Podcast Summary: “You Probably Don't Know What You're Good At. That Has To Stop”

Podcast: Becoming You with Suzy Welch
Host: Suzy Welch, NYU Stern Professor
Date: December 30, 2025

Overview

In this episode, Suzy Welch delves into the crucial topic of aptitudes—our natural, inborn strengths—and how most people either misunderstand or underappreciate what they are truly good at. Drawing on her personal experiences and her role as a professor teaching self-discovery and decision-making, Suzy outlines why discovering and owning your aptitudes is foundational to living a fulfilled and authentic life. Throughout the episode, she offers practical advice, personal anecdotes—including a formative and painful experience in business school—and direct tools for self-discovery.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Three Pillars of “Becoming You”

Timestamps: 01:30 – 03:55

• Suzy introduces her core framework: values, aptitudes, and interests.
• “These are the three tall poles of the becoming you methodology, each one of them super important.” (02:10)
• While values are often discussed, this episode zeros in on aptitudes—the natural “wiring” we tend to overlook.

2. Aptitudes vs. Skills and Expertise

Timestamps: 03:55 – 07:20

• Defines aptitudes as deeper, natural strengths—not learned skills or practiced expertise.
• Memorable analogy: writing with your dominant versus your non-dominant hand.
  • “Aptitudes are the dominant hand of your brain, okay? You could think of them as the raw materials of what you’re good at.” (05:25)
• Aptitudes are cognitive and can include certain personality traits.

3. Emotional & Personality-Based Aptitudes

Timestamps: 07:20 – 10:10

• Some personality traits are essentially forms of aptitude, e.g., curiosity, warmth, ability to make others feel liked.
• Insights from new studies: “The people who are the most liked are the people who actually like other people the most… That’s actually an aptitude, the ability to like a lot of people without judgment.” (09:15)
• Curiosity is highlighted as a critical aptitude for certain fields, like consulting.

4. The Gasp Story: A Lesson in Owning Your Strengths

Timestamps: 10:11 – 24:20

Context

• Suzy shares a pivotal business school story where she realized the costs of not owning her aptitudes.
• Early on, she underestimated her writing, her ability to connect with all kinds of people, and her curiosity.

Business School Experience

• At Harvard Business School, Suzy felt out of place among classmates with finance backgrounds.
• On the surface, she didn’t “fit”—previous crime reporter, not an investment banker.

Surprising Aptitude

• Invited to tutor economics and finance, despite not recognizing her own strength:
  • “I think you’ve got the wrong number...You’re calling the wrong person.” (15:15)
• Realization: She had a natural, inborn ability to understand and love finance, latent until confronted by evidence.
  • “The data was so obvious to me, that I was—had some kind of crazy aptitude for finance I just had no idea.” (16:25)
• Chose not to enter finance because her personality didn’t match the field, despite aptitude.

The Cold Call Incident

• In a tough, advanced finance class, Suzy diligently works through a very challenging case (four hours solo).
• She’s called to present; her solution is correct and praised by the professor.
• A male student (Tom) jokes: “I want to say that I agree with everything Suzanne’s husband just said.” (21:18)
• The class erupts in laughter, presuming she didn’t do the work herself.
• Suzy describes feeling publicly humiliated and dismissed.
  • “I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach. I mean, I like, saw stars.” (21:35)
• The situation is a memorable, teaching moment about the consequences of not openly owning one’s abilities.

5. The Moral: Claim and Own Your Aptitudes

Timestamps: 24:21 – 28:55

• Suzy reflects: The real regret isn’t Tom’s sexism, but her own lack of ownership.
  • “The person who I’m mad at is me. Because I never claimed my own abilities. I never owned how good I was at finance.” (24:35)
• Stating your aptitudes is not arrogance; it’s honesty.
  • “Why shouldn’t I? They’re all gifts anyway… A lot of the stuff I’m good at is ‘cause I just got some genes that made me good at it.” (25:18)
• Urges listeners to own their aptitudes, both for themselves and so others properly see them.

6. How to Discover and Test Your Aptitudes

Timestamps: 28:56 – 32:45

• Take formal tests—Suzy suggests youscience.com (no affiliation).
• Crowdsource data—ask people what first word comes to mind when they see your name pop up.
• Suzy’s self-made Pi360 tool: quick, inexpensive feedback from your network, rating your relationships, ideas, and execution.
• Emphasizes: “You gotta do the work. Doesn’t happen naturally.” (31:53)

7. Accepting Weaknesses and Focusing on Strengths

Timestamps: 32:46 – 34:15

• Suzy jokes about her “anti-aptitude”: singing.
  • “I’m the worst singer in the world. I’ve literally been in church singing and have had people ask me to stop singing.” (33:06)
• Accepting your weaknesses is liberating and allows you to focus on aptitudes.

8. Final Challenge & Call to Action

Timestamps: 34:16 – 35:45

• Encourages listeners to dig into their aptitudes through tests and honest self-inquiry.
• “Your aptitudes… It’s your job A, to discover them… and B, by owning them, saying, ‘I’m good at this and I’m gonna get better at it.’” (34:55)
• Becoming you means knowing—and telling—your own strengths story.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Aptitudes are the dominant hand of your brain, okay?… They’re what come naturally to you.” (05:25)
• “The people who are the most liked are the people who actually like other people the most.” (09:15)
• “I think you’ve got the wrong number… You’re calling the wrong person.” (15:15)
• “I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach.” (21:35)
• “The person who I’m mad at is me. Because I never claimed my own abilities.” (24:35)
• “Why shouldn’t I? They’re all gifts anyway… A lot of the stuff I’m good at is ‘cause I just got some genes that made me good at it.” (25:18)
• “I'm the worst singer in the world. I’ve literally been in church singing and have had people ask me to stop singing.” (33:06)

Structure of the Episode

• Intro and context setting (00:07 – 01:29)
• Defining aptitudes vs. skills (01:30 – 07:20)
• Personality and emotional aptitudes (07:20 – 10:10)
• Suzy’s ‘Gasp’ story: Harvard Business School humiliation and self-realization (10:11 – 24:20)
• Reflection: Own your aptitudes (24:21 – 28:55)
• How to find your strengths: tests, feedback, hacks (28:56 – 32:45)
• Normalize weaknesses; play to your natural gifts (32:46 – 34:15)
• Closing thoughts and call to action (34:16 – end)

Takeaways for Listeners

• Don’t assume you know your aptitudes—seek evidence and feedback early and often.
• Use both formal tools (like testing) and informal input (from those who know you) to discover your strengths.
• Claim your aptitudes publicly; let them be part of your story.
• Accept weaknesses to let your true strengths shine.
• Becoming “you” is an ongoing process—embrace the journey and take action.

For more conversation, you can connect with Suzy Welch on Instagram and LinkedIn.