Forrest and therapist Meg Josephson explore the fawn response, a survival strategy where safety is sought by pleasing other people. They discuss how fawning can start as self-protection in childhood, but later morph into overthinking, hypervigilance, and self-abandonment. Meg shares her own experience, including how fawning creates resentment and makes it difficult to find a healthy relationship or figure out your authentic needs. Topics include becoming aware of unconscious habits, building distress tolerance, grief, self-compassion, healthy boundaries, and speaking up for ourselves.

About our Guest: Meg Josephson is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and author of the new book Are You Mad at Me?

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:18: Self-sabotage as self-protection

4:01: Bringing the unconscious fawn response into awareness

9:51: Silencing wants and needs, conflict avoidance, and resentment

14:33: Rediscovering wants and needs after people pleasing

18:05: The healing arc: grief, anger, and relationship

25:30: Viewing people pleasing as a “part” rather than an identity

30:11: Nice vs. compassionate

51:36: Hypervigilance and the NICER practice

57:22: Authenticity as “uncovering” rather than “fixing”

1:03:02: Recap

Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.

Sponsors

If you have ADHD, or you love someone who does, I’d recommend checking out the podcast ADHD aha!

Level up your bedding with Quince. Go to Quince.com/BEINGWELL for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

Join hundreds of thousands of people who are taking charge of their health. Learn more and join Function at functionhealth.com/BEINGWELL.

Listen now to the Life Kit podcast from NPR.

Go to Zocdoc.com/BEING to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices