Bellied Up Podcast – Episode #175

Is the Bartender Flirting or Just Doing Their Job?
November 13, 2025

Overview

In this laughter-filled episode of Bellied Up, hosts Charlie Berens and Myles “You Betcha Guy” reunite at the original bar from their first episodes to take live calls from Midwest listeners. The major theme revolves around the blurry line between bartenders doing their job and actual flirting—brought home by a caller seeking advice about a potential romance at his local bar. Along the way, Charlie and Myles riff on quitting nicotine, Midwest bar culture, family dynamics at deer camp, and provide genuinely insightful advice—all with their trademark banter and Midwestern wit.

Episode Highlights & Key Topics

1. Back at the OG Bar & Reflections on Quitting Nicotine

• Timestamps: 00:00 – 16:24
• Charlie and Myles are broadcasting from the very first bar they ever used for the podcast, celebrating their legacy with nostalgia and jokes about the bar’s legendary sturdiness.
• Charlie opens up about his journey quitting nicotine: from swiping half-smoked cigarettes as a kid to trying gum and Zyns, culminating in his current (mostly) nicotine-free lifestyle.
  • "I think I had one of the first Zyns that ever came into this country." – Charlie (04:51)
  • Myles humorously holds Charlie accountable in front of listeners, teasing him about relapses and support.
  • Insights into addiction, quitting strategies, and dealing with cravings.
  • Charlie’s advice: “You don’t need to quit forever. You just need to quit for 10 minutes.” (12:25)
  • Book idea: A diary-style addiction memoir that restarts every few weeks after slip-ups.

2. Caller #1: Eric and "Is the Bartender Flirting?"

• Timestamps: 16:24 – 46:47

Eric’s Story & Dilemma

• Eric calls in with a smooth, radio-ready voice and a relatable question: does his local bartender in small-town Wisconsin actually like him, or is she just being friendly for tips?
  • He references classic bar tropes: heavier pours, occasional free drinks, teaching him bar dice rules, and deep jukebox chats.
  • He describes an interaction: "There is an energy... a vibe. This couple next to me just straight out asks me, 'Are you two dating?'” (25:27)
  • Some physical touch (a grab and hold of the hand) but nothing overt.

Hosts’ Analysis & Advice

• Myles & Charlie break down bartender behaviors: free drinks, heavy pour, chatting about music—all “good bartender” moves, not clear-cut signs of romantic interest.
• Physical touch and frequent, locked-in eye contact are possible indicators, but caution is warranted.
  • “You have described not someone who is necessarily interested in you, as much as you’ve described a good bartender, someone who's good at their job.” – Charlie (24:35)
  • "In the business, we call that sending doomy eyes." – Myles (28:20)

How To Move Forward?

• Strategies for ‘breaking the bubble’:
  1. The Ticket Approach: Secure tickets to a bluegrass show and casually offer her one; thoughtful but low-pressure.
     • “That might be giving a mixed signal, though—like maybe you’re not interested. Or you get three tickets, say ‘bring a friend’... though that could backfire!” – Charlie (35:12)
  2. “Touchpoint” Approach: Get her number for a music-related reason, send articles or record store finds, and see how the dynamic develops outside the bar.
  3. The “Help Out” Move: Offer help closing the bar—a very Midwest, low-key method.
• Both hosts stress maintaining the friendship and not making things awkward at the local bar if romance doesn’t pan out.
  • “You seem like a guy who's going for the full person, not just a one-night thing. And I guarantee everyone else in that bar... is going for that one-night thing.” – Charlie (40:25)
• Eric decides he’ll start subtle—via a sexy jukebox playlist—and will report back (“bellied update”).

3. Caller #2: Ava and the Deer Camp Gender Divide

• Timestamps: 52:10 – 82:47

Ava’s Situation

• Recently returned to Chippewa Falls, WI, after a master’s in Barcelona; living at her childhood home, job-hunting, and mulling Midwest traditions.
• She wants to join her father and brother at deer camp—a space long dominated by men in her family, though her cousin Meg has recently broken that barrier.

Hosts’ Deep-Dive: Midwest Gender Roles & Deer Camp Politics

• Charlie and Myles frame the deer camp as a sacred “guys’ trip”—a retreat threatened by including women, at least in some men’s eyes.
  • “Guys are primal creatures, and they need that time... Guys being dudes, and that's hunting and golfing and stuff like that.” – Myles (62:13)
• Candid discussion about changing traditions, generational divides, and why there was resistance despite Meg’s inclusion.

Advice: Strategies for Fitting In

• The hosts suggest ways to “prove” Ava can hang at camp, tongue-in-cheek:
  • Start chewing tobacco, up the beer intake, engage in “locker-room” humor.
  • Find an ally among the uncles; use subtle bribery or leverage her tomboy skills.
  • “You gotta take the alpha dog status!” – Myles (73:37)
  • Consider differentiating herself by going for bow hunting.
• An improv family skit: Charlie and Myles roleplay her dad and brother to (hilariously) simulate the banter and hazing she’d face at camp.
  • "You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning." – Ava (77:44)
  • “You should have been a boy,” becomes a running, satirical refrain about breaking through these Midwestern barriers.
• Ultimately, the hosts encourage persistence, suggest that the time is ripe for Ava to assert herself, and leave her with the goal of “ripping and gripping.”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Built like a brick shithouse.” – Charlie, describing the podcast bar (00:51)
• “The people who think they can pick up the bartender are the people who think like the government is following them.” – Charlie (19:37)
• “Is it love or a bigger tip?” – Myles, introducing a recurring bit (23:51)
• “If she sends you one text back or just a thumbs up... then you know.” – Myles, about low-key flirting vs. disinterest (39:08)
• “That song’s erotic, dude. If you watch the intensity in Lion King…” – Charlie, on choosing a jukebox playlist (44:43)
• Ava roleplays the deer camp banter: “You wish, Grant!” – Ava, shutting down her fake brother (76:40)
• “You gotta love some toxic masculinity in the morning.” – Myles (81:09)

Call Segment Timestamps

• Quit Nicotine Story & Advice: 00:00 – 16:24
• Caller #1: Eric & Bartender Dilemma: 16:24 – 46:47
  • [Love or Tip? Segment begin:] 23:51
  • [Physical Touch Analysis:] 25:39
  • [Jukebox Song Strategy & Eye Contact:] 28:06
  • [How to Ask Without Being Creepy:] 33:46
• Caller #2: Ava & Deer Camp: 52:10 – 82:47
  • [Roleplay/Improv with Eva in Deer Camp:] 75:59

Tone & Style

• Charming, self-deprecating Midwestern humor with plenty of running gags.
• Friendly, earnest advice mixed with comic exaggeration.
• Calls blend personal stories with improvisational bits, always circling back to the listeners and their questions.

Takeaways

• For quitting nicotine: “Ten minutes at a time.” Small victories matter; the hosts’ humor makes the struggle relatable.
• For romance in Midwest bars: Most bartenders are just doing their jobs well; subtlety, friendship, and mutual interests are the best entry points for exploring more.
• For navigating traditional Midwest gender roles: Be persistent, prove you can fit in, but don’t betray your own style; self-assurance and humor go a long way toward breaking down old barriers.

“Bellied Up” Take-Home

If you want to find out if the bartender likes you, pay close attention to their cues, but always err on the side of being respectful and not making things awkward. Whether quitting nicotine or breaking into deer camp, success follows honest effort, a thick skin, and a hearty sense of humor—all sprinkled with a little Midwest charm.

Listen for: heartfelt advice hidden in jokes, relatable Midwest stories, and some of the best improvised bits you’ll find behind a (literal) Midwest bar.