Nicole is a Creamologist in the Creamy Kitchen

Summary

Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata

Episode: “Nicole is a Creamologist in the Creamy Kitchen”
Date: April 1, 2026 | Host: Headgum

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Episode Overview

In this lively and candid episode, Nicole and Sasheer dive into their current obsessions, reality TV drama, experiments in the kitchen, aging struggles, and the nuances of maintaining friendships. Packed with hilarious banter, thoughtful advice, and the playful chemistry that defines their best-friendship, this episode navigates everything from ice cream mishaps to dream analysis and the weird rules of the Chinese zodiac, sprinkled with their trademark wit and empathy.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Language Learning Adventures

• Nicole & Sasheer swap updates on using language apps like Rosetta Stone and Duolingo
  • Nicole shares her experiences conversing in Spanish, feeling motivated by encouraging encounters.

    “I drove home on fucking cloud nine. I was like, I love, I love communication.” – Nicole (03:54)

  • Sasheer finds it easier to practice with fellow learners who speak slowly, rather than fluent speakers.

2. 90 Day Fiancé Drama Deep Dive

• Nicole recaps the current drama from the “90 Day Fiancé: The Single Life,” centering on Kim’s complicated family secrets and catfishing scandal.

  “Catfishing your son as your son, as your son. That's a lot.” – Sasheer (06:30)

• Both marvel at the escalating messiness of reality TV and the unpredictable twists that keep them hooked.

3. What Are You Watching?

• Sasheer is hooked on “All Her Fault” on Peacock:
  • She highlights the show’s focus on parental ignorance and how men are portrayed as out-of-touch dads.
  • Both chat about Dakota Fanning’s adult career and reminisce about Denzel Washington movies.

    “I need to sit down and watch more of Denzel Washington's movies. ... Maybe I'll add him to the stable.” – Nicole (10:28)

• Nicole introduces her concept of a “stable” for attractive older actors (a running joke for regular listeners).

4. Interesting Teeth and Supermodel Nostalgia

• Spirited discussion about the appeal of “interesting teeth” in celebrities like Denzel Washington and Morgan Freeman.
• The pair dig deep into the “Top Model” documentary, debate past modeling industry beauty standards, and express shock at Tyra Banks’ on-screen antics.

  “They really put them through it.” – Nicole (15:59)

5. Nostalgic Breakfast Foods & Kitchen Experiments

• Nicole and Sasheer reminisce about Toaster Strudels, Pop-Tarts, and the ritual of icing packets vs. Pop-Tarts simplicity.
• Nicole’s adventures with her Ninja Creamy ice cream maker get a highlight, including her failed Diet Dr. Pepper ice cream experiment.

  “I'm a creamologist in the creamy kitchen. In the Ninja Creamy kitchen.” – Nicole (25:10)

• The duo give shoutouts to the culinary prowess of Ina Garten, the Barefoot Contessa, with Nicole describing her as a “food scientist.”
• Amusing confessions about baking errors (folding flour incorrectly) and how even mistakes can be delicious.

6. House-Only Socks, Bare Feet, and Gripping the Earth

• They debate the merits of wearing socks at home, barefoot liberation, and unexpectedly, foot ailments like plantar fasciitis.
• Playful banter about the oddity (and horror) of picking things up with toes, segueing into conversations about aging pains and sleeping positions.

  “I like to grip the earth with my toes.” – Nicole (30:13)

• Sasheer contemplates the benefits of sleeping in a hammock for her aching shoulders.

7. Superpowers & Nosy Tendencies

• Hypothetical: Would you rather fly secretly or read minds at night?
  • Nicole: “I pick making people do what I want. I want everyone to act right.” (39:34)
  • Sasheer: “So you want to be in everyone's business and make them do what you want?” (39:39)
• Nicole outs herself as “extremely nosy,” even hanging out in her car to spy on a suspicious neighbor.

8. Recurring Dreams & Their Meanings

• Nicole details a “scary man and intrusive house” recurring dream.
• Ali provides dream analysis, linking it to issues of vulnerability and loss of control.
  • Nicole is displeased by the symbolism, wishing instead for “gifts are coming, good fortune.” (46:09)
• The friends discuss inheritance of Chinese zodiac signs, discovering they are both Year of the Tiger, and enjoy the fortunes and rules associated with Chinese New Year.

  “Everywhere I go, people are like, stop being so rigid.” – Nicole (48:16)

9. School Snacks & Cookie Boom

• Fond memories of Otis Spunkmeyer and Famous Amos cookies in school.
• Playful research into cookie brand history, realizing the 1970s were a "cookie boom."

  “The 70s was all about drugs and love and cookies.” – Nicole (52:10)

10. Advice Segment: Friendship & Grief, Drifting Friends, and Tough Conversations

• The episode closes with insightful advice to listener letters on:
  • Reconciling with friends who disappear during grief (death of a parent).
  • Navigating friends whose texting style is abrasive or who seem to be drifting away after a move.
  • Setting boundaries and deciding whether to have hard conversations with a frequently canceling (and possibly using) friend.

  “If you have found, hopefully you have found people in your life who you can talk to about your dad or loss...but you can't get that out of people who don't want to give it.” – Sasheer (58:47) “In my old age, I'm kind of over trying to convince people to hang out with me. Like, either you want it or you don't.” – Sasheer (69:01) “I also do kind of feel like Dee’s using our friend…something’s fishy about Dee.” – Nicole (70:34)

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Memorable Quotes & Timestamps

• On learning Spanish:
  “I drove home on fucking cloud nine. I was like, I love, I love communication.”
  – Nicole (03:54)

• On reality TV:
  “Catfishing your son as your son, as your son. That's a lot.”
  – Sasheer (06:30)

• On model beauty standards:
  “They really put them through it.”
  – Nicole (15:59)

• On kitchen failures:
  “I'm a creamologist in the creamy kitchen.”
  – Nicole (25:10)

• On bare feet:
  “I like to grip the earth with my toes.”
  – Nicole (30:13)

• On aging:
  “And that's my issue about getting older. I don't mind the wrinkles…It's the aches and the fucking pains.”
  – Nicole (32:48)

• On nosiness:
  “I want everyone to act right.”
  – Nicole (39:37)

• On dream interpretation:
  “I was hoping it'd be like, gifts are coming, good fortune.”
  – Nicole (46:09)

• On friend drift:
  “In my old age, I'm kind of over trying to convince people to hang out with me. Like, either you want it or you don't.”
  – Sasheer (69:01)

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Important Segment Timestamps

• [01:49] – Language learning with Rosetta Stone and Duolingo
• [04:27] – 90 Day Fiancé recap and thoughts on messy reality TV
• [06:51] – “All Her Fault,” Dakota Fanning and Denzel’s place in Nicole’s “stable”
• [12:33] – Teeth talk, Top Model documentary, and model beauty standards
• [22:51] – Toaster Strudel and Pop-Tart nostalgia
• [24:28] – Nicole’s Ninja Creamy ice cream disasters and triumphs
• [26:07] – Ina Garten’s brownie recipe and culinary confessions
• [29:36] – Socks vs. barefoot at home and foot health
• [32:48] – Aging aches, pains, and hammock sleep hypotheses
• [39:34] – Superpowers and nosiness confessions
• [41:02] – Nicole’s recurring dream and live dream analysis
• [44:14] – Chinese zodiac, shared Year of the Tiger, and New Year traditions
• [52:10] – School cookie nostalgia and the “cookie boom” of the 1970s
• [53:13] – Listener Queries: Car branding
• [55:01] – Listener Queries: Friends drifting after death in the family
• [61:07] – Listener Queries: Texting styles and blunt friends
• [66:06] – Listener Queries: Canceled plans, boundaries, and tough talks

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Language and Tone

Throughout, Nicole and Sasheer maintain their playful, self-aware, and honest tone, blending heartfelt advice with off-the-cuff humor, and never missing a beat in their friendship dynamic.

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Summary Takeaway

This episode perfectly encapsulates the spirit of “Best Friends”—hilarity, honest self-discovery, and practical wisdom, all delivered with warmth and irreverence. Whether reminiscing about strange ‘90s snacks, diving into kitchen experiments gone awry, or unpacking the emotional complexity of friendships (and dreams), Nicole and Sasheer show how the best conversations cut between laughter and meaningful connection.

Transcript

[Ali]

This is a headgun podcast.

[Nicole Byer]

Starting something new isn't just hard, it's terrifying. So much work goes into this thing that you're not entirely sure will work out, and it can be hard to make that leap of faith. Trust me, I know. When we started this podcast, we weren't even sure what we were doing. What if no one listens? What if I make a fool of myself? Now we know that we were right in believing ourselves, despite all the fears and hesitations. It also helps when you have a partner like Shopify on your side to help get started with your own design studio. With hundreds of ready to use templates, Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store that matches your brand style, accelerate your efficiency. Whether you're uploading new products or trying to improve existing ones, Shopify is packed with helpful AI tools that write product descriptions, page headlines, and even enhance your product photography. Get the word out like you have a marketing team behind you. You easily create email and social media campaigns wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling. Best yet, Shopify is your commerce expert. With world class expertise in everything from managing inventory to international shipping, to processing returns and beyond, it's time to turn those what ifs into Cha Ching with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.combestfriend friends go to shopify.com best friends. That's shopify.com best friends. Hola, mi amor.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hola, mi amiga.

[Nicole Byer]

And that's where that stops. Okay, we've talked about it before, but I've been continuing my journey on Rosetta Stone.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Great.

[Nicole Byer]

La mujer Gorre. They're really stuck on the women.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Women are running.

[Nicole Byer]

El hombre is corre.

[Sasheer Zamata]

People are running.

[Nicole Byer]

The men. I think el hombre is the men. The men are running. Yeah, they're stuck on running, reading, escriba writing. Um, yeah, this is. It feels like what's happening with Rosetta Stone is the same thing that happened with Duolingo with me, where it was like, yo como mensanas.

[Sasheer Zamata]

They were talking about apples forever.

[Nicole Byer]

They loved apples.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, I do. I think I will get a lot of help by talking with people who are also learning Spanish. Because when I talk to people who know Spanish, they can say a whole sense of words that I know.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But it's so fast. Or it sounds in a way that I. For some reason my brain's not catching up that I can't get it. And I'm like, oh, man, I knew what you were saying, but I didn't because it Was so fast.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But I think if I slowly talk with people who are also slowly talking, I can get it better, hopefully, and then eventually graduate talking to people who are fluent.

[Nicole Byer]

I think that's a good strategy. I've been insane. I was leaving a parking structure the other night and was paying on. It was like a tap thing on their phone and I saw that it said acceptar. And I said, tu tu Abraham or tu abro espanol. And he was like, si. And I said, yo aprente or a prendo espanol. And then he went, si. And then he said something. I can't remember what he said, but I was able to respond. And he was like, muy bueno. And I believe he said, keep going.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Good.

[Nicole Byer]

And I was, I. I drove home on fucking cloud nine. I was like, I love, I love communication. But it is interesting because I. I feel like everybody I speak to in Spanish who speak Spanish, they're all so nice to me and like, really patient and like happy to speak to me in Spanish. Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I think they're like, excited that you're trying. Yes. Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

And that's all you of people.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's all you can ask.

[Nicole Byer]

You can only ask for them to drive.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Just try.

[Nicole Byer]

Just try. I know you don't watch 90 Day Fiance, but I only talk about it with Marcy, who I host 90 Day Bae with. But I just want to tell you what's happening in the 90 day universe. Just real quick. There is a woman, Kim, episode one of 90 Day the Single Life, because she was dating Usman, Soulja boy from Nigeria, who is a singer. They break up. She gets back home, now she's single, she's looking to mingle. And at the end of the episode, you find out that she, well, she has a son named Jamal. But at the end of the episode, you find out there's another son that she gave up for adoption, Larry, who is Jamal's full blood brother, that she was in like a bad relationship with their father and gave him up for adoption. The end of episode two, you find out there's a third one. She gave up two kids for adoption, a boy and a girl. We don't know the girl's name. And then on Instagram yesterday, we find out she said on the show that Larry reached out to her via like ancestry.com or like, somehow he found her.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

But then she was like, I gotta clear something up. The reason why Jamal was so mad at me is because for three months I was catfishing Larry as Jamal.

[Sasheer Zamata]

She was catfishing her Son.

[Nicole Byer]

She was catfishing her son as her son who didn't even know that the other son existed.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, well, yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

And I was like, whoa, how do you start messy? And get. How does it get messier?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Messier. Which also, like, I guess you don't know how someone's gonna react when you're like, hey, I'm your mom who gave you up for adoption. So maybe she thought, as a brother, it would be better. But that's. But then also, like, they're gonna find out, and that's gonna make it even harder. You're making an uphill battle for this person to be like, I trust you now.

[Nicole Byer]

Now, nobody trusts her.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Nobody trusts her.

[Nicole Byer]

Isn't that wild?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Catfishing your son as your son, as your son. That's a lot.

[Nicole Byer]

It's so much. And I'm just like, yes. Reality television is back. That is messy. I'm loving it. People are really wild. Oh, my goodness.

[Sasheer Zamata]

My goodness gracious.

[Nicole Byer]

What are you watching?

[Sasheer Zamata]

All Her Fault. Have you seen it? No. Heard of it?

[Nicole Byer]

I think I've heard of it. It's on Peacock, right?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Peacock. With Sarah Snook and a bunch of other people.

[Nicole Byer]

That's a great name. Sara Snuff, right?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Isn't that her name? Yeah. She was on Succession, which I didn't see, but I know she's in that show.

[Nicole Byer]

Did she succeed?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I have no idea. It's funny, while I'm watching the show, all her fault. Anytime there's another woman on screen, I'm like, it's her fault. Oh, actually, it's her fault. You know what? It's probably all her fault.

[Nicole Byer]

Her fault.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And it kind of. It's really interesting. It kind of is a lot of people's faults. There's, like, different moments where it's like, oh, now I see why it's her fault. Oh, now I see why it's her fault. Interesting. Okay. But then also, there's a real strong theme of men being inept. Like. Cause it. There's. It's not. This is not a spoiler. Cause it's literally the first scene of the show. In the concept of the show, a kid gets taken, and no one's sure how or why or how we got to this point. But a lot of the dads of the show are like, yeah, his teacher's name is. And, like, looks at the wife to be like, what's the teacher's name? Like, they don't know about their kids or, like, the family life or what is involved with the daily schedule, so they can't Answer the questions for the police because they literally don't know. And I was like, damn, I hope everyone watches this and is like, ev, yes, dads need to step up. Some dabs are amazing.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But there's a lot like that. That's pretty normal for men to be like. But she. But you got it. You're the mom. This is your job. You got it.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't think my dad knew any of my teachers. I. My dad, I don't think he went to back to school. I think that was like my mom, that was her jam. That was. That was her thing.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. Which, like, especially in these times, in these modern times, women are also working full time jobs and taking care of their kids. Like, it's too much.

[Nicole Byer]

It is too much. So a kid goes, how deep are you into it?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I only have one episode left.

[Nicole Byer]

Do you know whose fault it is?

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's kind of everybody's fault. But then. But they're now pointing at one person where it really is all her fault

[Nicole Byer]

is Dakota Fan again.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes.

[Nicole Byer]

Okay, so I have seen this.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, you.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, no, no, no. I know it exists. I know it's in the ether.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. Which I love. Dakota adult acting, like, as opposed to child acting, I guess. I love that she stuck with it. That she wasn't like, that's, that's, you know, that was my past.

[Nicole Byer]

I was like, you get to meet her and I hope you say that to her.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I'm really glad you're stuck with it. I'm really stuck with it.

[Nicole Byer]

You know, some kid actors, they give up.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Not you.

[Nicole Byer]

They stuck with it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's true, though. Or they're like disillusioned with the, with the industry and they're like, I don't like this doesn't feel right. Or they go do something else with their life. I do think she had a little bit of a break, but I'm glad that she's back.

[Nicole Byer]

What? She was in Sam. I am. Was that her big thing? Her first movie?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I guess.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't know any of her other movies.

[Sasheer Zamata]

She was Girls. Uptown Girls.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, I've never seen that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

She was in a Denzel Washington movie.

[Nicole Byer]

Ooh, the Equalizer.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Was it the Equalizer?

[Ali]

I don't think so.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I don't remember. I don't think so.

[Nicole Byer]

Probably not. Gladiator 2. No, I'm kidding.

[Ali]

Man on fire.

[Nicole Byer]

I need to sit down and watch more of Denzel Washington's movies. Yeah. Because he is one of our legends.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Truly a living.

[Nicole Byer]

Maybe I'll add him to the stable. How old Is Denzel Washington. He is 71 in the stable

[Sasheer Zamata]

in your old man's table.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. Thank you for saying that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

In case people didn't hear the previous

[Nicole Byer]

episode, this is the first one they listen to, and they're like, she has a stable where she's putting actors above 65. Okay. Yeah. Well, get on board, y'. All.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I feel like Denzel. I. I would be scared to have him in my stable because he seems like he suffers nose. No.

[Nicole Byer]

Fools. Yes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And be like, I don't have time for this.

[Nicole Byer]

Like, I. I don't.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I. I don't want my feelings to be hurt. Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

I think he'd break out of the stable and be like, I have things to do.

[Ali]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I don't have time to be in the stable.

[Nicole Byer]

His teeth are so magnificent.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Really great teeth. Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, my goodness. I love a good tooth, but I also love an interesting tooth.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

And his are, like, big and strong, but they're also interesting.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, I guess so.

[Nicole Byer]

What a weird compliment to give someone. I love your big, strong, interesting teeth. Why? Just, I think, like, straight. Maybe all of his teeth are straight. What do the bottom teeth look like?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I don't know.

[Nicole Byer]

I'm only thinking about the top ones.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Those are the ones that we see the most. I don't know where. The bottoms one. I think in my mind they're all straight, Elliot.

[Nicole Byer]

Maybe they are all straight.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Put it on the screen.

[Nicole Byer]

Put on that screen for us.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Looks pretty straight to me.

[Nicole Byer]

Well, those bottom ones, I think, are a little. Oh, I think that's a little tongue action.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You can tell the difference between his tongue and his teeth.

[Nicole Byer]

I think those bottom ones are interesting.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I guess so. Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

H. What a beauty.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I think that he's just, like. Has a natural good smile.

[Nicole Byer]

He does. Yeah. Looking good.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Really took you somewhere.

[Nicole Byer]

It really did. Oh, my goodness. What were you. What were you gonna say?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, I've been seeing these clips of the.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, Morgan Freeman, too, has interesting teeth. No. He can get on the stable.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't know. I'm really. Something's going on.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Something is going on.

[Nicole Byer]

Sorry, what were you saying?

[Sasheer Zamata]

The. I've been seeing clips from or like, snippets of the Tyra Banks top Model documentary.

[Nicole Byer]

We gotta watch it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

We have to watch it. Yes, but, like, talking about teeth and how they, like, actually did dental surgery to women on the show.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Because they're like, you have a snaggletooth, you have a gap. Let's fix it.

[Nicole Byer]

Which is so curious to me, because I don't know Like, I always thought models, like, it's like, yes, you're beautiful, but you're also interesting. And it's like, teeth are a part of looking interesting, but I think that's more recent.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I don't know if that was, like. Oh. I think models used to, like, when it was like, supermodels, when that was a thing. I think you had to be, like, perfect in a way. You. They still looked very different than. Yes.

[Nicole Byer]

Average people.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But, like, I think the more interesting look or unique look, where it's like, yeah, you can have very fuzzy eyebrows, a gap in your tooth. Yeah. Just like, something that's not, like, obviously, like, this is quote, unquote, standard beauty. I think that's more of a recent thing than.

[Nicole Byer]

Okay. Back then about Kate Moss. I think she has interesting teeth.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't think she has perfect. Maybe she's the only one. But anyway, you're right. Like, Linda Evangelista. Stunning. Cindy Crawford. Stunning, Flawless, beautiful. Naomi Campbell. Naomi Campbell's so beautiful. I love that she throws telephones at people. Like, oh, my goodness. That's fun. She's having fun. She's always having fun launching things at people.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes.

[Nicole Byer]

I think she did her community service in a gown.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I didn't know that.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. But, yeah, we do have to watch it, because it feels like the clips I've seen, Tyra's like, we did what we did to make good television.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I'm surprised she even said yes to that.

[Nicole Byer]

Maybe Top Models coming back. Is this what. Yes, I think this is to, like, introduce cycle 25 or something like that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Wow. Honestly, with, like, as many people. Many clips of people are pulling from the past of, like, things that do not hold up well. I would stay away from the franchise.

[Nicole Byer]

Same. I would go, ooh, that's not for me. And then poor Ms. J, I believe, suffered. He suffered a stroke. Yeah. I was like, a lot of things happened. My goodness. And then I read somewhere that the portfolios they left the show with were too much for modeling agencies.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Of course they were, because they're, like, in pasta. They're, like, laying impossible with tomatoes on their head.

[Nicole Byer]

They're like, these aren't real. Ragu was, like, too much.

[Sasheer Zamata]

They're like a different race that doesn't really represent you. Oh, we can't really use this.

[Nicole Byer]

For me, I did. I was, like, not super deep in a top model. But the worst ones for me was, like, the makeover episodes where, like, somebody would have, like, long, beautiful brown hair, and they'd be like, all right, we're gonna Shave it and dye it red.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

And then they'd be like, yeah. Tyrus says it looks better this way. And it's like, my goodness.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. They really put them through it.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. And then apparently her. I was rooting for you. Yeah, apparently. I think I saw a clip that was like. She said more things that had to be cut and then, like, a lawyer was brought in. Or Am I right?

[Ali]

No, you're right. You're right.

[Nicole Byer]

We have to watch this. I want to watch it. It's on Netflix, right?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Is it ok?

[Nicole Byer]

We have to watch it at your house? Because I have ads.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Great. We'll do that.

[Nicole Byer]

Every seven minutes an ad pops up. It's tough.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I just saw this thing that said that Sony just patented a TV where when a commercial comes on it, something like it won't show you the show until you stand up and say the name of the product. And then I pledge allegiance pretty much

[Nicole Byer]

to Glad Trash bags.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Eggo. Eggo waffles.

[Nicole Byer]

That's nuts. Who's buying that tv? Someone who didn't do research.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

They're stuck in hell.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, pretty much. I don't know if it's actually made or if they just patented it, but it feels really dystopian.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, my. Yeah, I. We don't need that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No. Also, it's weird because, like, you're just selling the tv. It's not like. Like when someone buys the tv, they already bought it from you. There's not like there's a subscription or like, what. What benefit does the TV company get from ads?

[Nicole Byer]

I don't know, but we need.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Speaking of ads, we need to throw.

[Nicole Byer]

We gotta throw to an ad right now.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You know that feeling when you're packing for a vacation but nothing feels cool or weather appropriate? You could buy a whole new wardrobe for your trip, or you could just rent stuff from Nuuly and send it back when you're done. Nuuly is a subscription clothing rental service that lets you pick six styles every month for 98amonth. You get your choice of any six styles. Rent for whatever you have going on. You can get dresses and fancy stuff or just some things for every day. Access to thousands of styles from hundreds of brands. Nuuly carries labels like Free People Reformation, Lisa says Gah and more. Nuuly is proud to have inclusive sizing with options for plus petite, tall, maternity, fast, free shipping and returns, plus professional dry cleaning, plus laundry and the option to buy what you love at a really great discount. The great thing about Nuuly is you get to Wear more while spending less. Curb that must buy something new feeling you get when there are events on the calendar and still feel excited about your wardrobe. It helps you have fun and get creative and explore your style without making commitments. Free your closet of impulse purchases and skip the nothing to wear spiral by renting instead. There are no late fees, damage fees, or fees to pause or cancel, so no big deal if you lose a button, spill something, or just need to take a break. Nuuly is a great value at $98 a month for any six styles, but right now you can get $28 off your first month. When you sign up with the code Best Friends, just go to n u l y.com and enter the code Best Friends at signup to get $28 off your first month. That's n u u l y.com nuuly with two U's and the code best friends for $28 for your first month so newly Subscription Clothing Rental Change your clothes as best friends. We take a lot of trips together and we love to travel together. A few years ago we went to Big Sur and we stayed at an Airbnb with a group of friends to celebrate one of our friends getting a master's degree. It was so important that we had room for ourselves and each of us wanted our own private space because we are adults and we don't love to share all of our space. And we ended up staying in this really cute house at a beautiful view, plenty of bedrooms. There was a pool. Nicole needs a pool. That's like a necessity for her. We had a big kitchen for people to cook in. I don't cook, but other people do. And it was great. And I think the thing that made it so special was that it was through Airbnb. Airbnb gives you more space, more privacy, better locations, and beautiful homes to make vacation memories. We'd rather meet up in a living room than a hotel lobby, and booking stays through Airbnb makes that possible. Picture this. It's late at night and you're scrolling through your feeds when all of a sudden you see that one product that you've been looking for. You click on the link, you add it to the cart, maybe even shop around a little bit more before finally hitting checkout. As you're filling in your address, you realize you don't have your card anywhere near you. That's when you see it. That purple pay button that has all of your information saved, making checking out as simple as a simple tap of your screen. Get started with your own design studio. With hundreds of ready to use templates, Shopify helps you build a beautiful store that matches your brand style. Accelerate your efficiency. Whether you're uploading new products or trying to improve existing ones, Shopify is packed with helpful AI tools that write product descriptions, page headlines, and even enhance your product photography. Get the word out like you have a marketing team behind you. Easily create email and social media campaigns wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling. See less carts go abandon and more sales go abandon. Cha ching with Shopify and their shop pay button. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.com Best friends go to shopify.com Best friends that shopify.com Best friends.

[Nicole Byer]

Now. I hope after you heard what that ad was, you stood up wherever you were listening to this or watching this and you said the name of what it was.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Because that helps.

[Nicole Byer]

For some reason that helps. I hope you repeated code. Best friends.

[Sasheer Zamata]

B E S C I E N

[Nicole Byer]

D S. You said Eggo a while ago. I haven't thought about eggo waffles in a long time. Yeah, I haven't had one in a long time.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I haven't either. I feel like I probably have been to a restaurant where they served IO waffles.

[Nicole Byer]

Probably.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But I haven't bought eggo waffles in a long time.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't have a toaster. Like a. Oh. I guess I could put it in the. The oven. Toaster.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

Well, to me, a toaster oven is the slits.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Ew.

[Nicole Byer]

The slit. So you put them in the slit. Flick it down.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No, don't flick it.

[Nicole Byer]

Come up.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No.

[Nicole Byer]

But I have the oven.

[Ali]

Oh.

[Nicole Byer]

Is there a difference? They're both called toast. Oh. One's just a toaster.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Mm.

[Nicole Byer]

And one is a toaster oven. Do you remember toaster strudels?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, they were good.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, you really lit up.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That was like my breakfast for a while when I was a kid.

[Nicole Byer]

I think I knew this about you.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

I'm an old school pop tart head. Oh.

[Sasheer Zamata]

For some reason, toaster strudel felt like a little fancier.

[Nicole Byer]

It's like because you gotta open that icing pack and then drizzle it on.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I'm a chef. I'm a pastry chef. Chef.

[Nicole Byer]

It's like a lunchable when you're, like, assembling and you're like, it's the perfect cracker bite. Yum.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And it's got like a flaky outside. So it's kind of like a croissant.

[Nicole Byer]

It's got a flaky outside. This is so fun. We got to get you some Toaster Strudels.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I don't know if I would like it today, but I, like, really liked it when I was younger.

[Nicole Byer]

Maybe we've talked about this, but I loved the brown sugar cinnamon Pop Tarts. And I would cut them in half and scrape out the inside and just eat the sugary inside. And then I would eat the. I would leave the back. Cause that had no use for me. And then I would put the frosted side upside down so my tongue could really get it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh. She said, let me get all the sugar immediately.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. I said, I want diabetes any way I can get it. And I succeeded as fast as possible. I did it. It took a while, but got there. I also really love a strawberry unfrosted Pop Tart heated up with vanilla ice cream. Whoa.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That sounds really good.

[Nicole Byer]

It's really, really yummy. Oh, my Ninja Creamy update.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

You didn't ask for it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Didn't know there was one.

[Nicole Byer]

My ninja. You still haven't seen my Ninja cream with Creamify technology. So I was trying to make diet Dr. Pepper ice cream because I love diet Dr. Pepper and I love, like, a float. And I was like, what if the float was just ice cream? But I didn't put enough diet Dr. Pepper in it? And it was like a whisper of diet Dr. Pepper, and it wasn't good. This is my fourth creamy, and it was bad.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I'm so sorry.

[Nicole Byer]

Don't be sorry. I'm experimenting.

[Sasheer Zamata]

She's a scientist. I'm a cremologist.

[Nicole Byer]

I'm a cremologist. In the creamy kitchen. In the Ninja Creamy kitchen. I was like, out of four, one being bad. That's not bad.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Good. Average. Yeah. Is it, like, inedible or just, like, didn't taste how you wanted it to taste?

[Nicole Byer]

It didn't taste how I wanted it to taste. It was a vanilla base with the diet Dr. Pepper in it. And I think what I needed was more Diet Dr. Pepper than the base.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

And, you know, experiments, you have your control, your variable, and your hypothesis. And the hypothesis was, this will be yummy.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Failed. Failed.

[Nicole Byer]

But I've made other delicious ones.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay. Maybe you can use that root beer light ice cream in a root beer float. Or I guess a Dr. Pepper's float.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. But I got so mad that I put hot water on it and cleaned it out.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Wow. Okay. She said, no one will ever say this.

[Nicole Byer]

No one will say my mistake also. Okay. I didn't grow up with cable, so I didn't really watch the Food Network. So I'm very new to Aidna Gardner, the Barefoot Contessa, which is such an interesting. Was that the name of the show or is that like, her alter ego?

[Ali]

So the Barefoot Contessa was the name of her shop that she owned and operated. Like, that was in the. I think it was in the Hamptons. And then she became known as the Barefoot Contessa, and then she got her show.

[Nicole Byer]

This woman is a food scientist.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Ooh.

[Nicole Byer]

Every recipe I've ever tried from her is incredible. So I didn't make brownie pudding because I'm waiting for you.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Thank you.

[Nicole Byer]

But I did make brownies.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

And these are the best brownies I have ever had.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Ooh.

[Nicole Byer]

Let alone made. And I made a gluten free version that was also incredible.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Wow.

[Nicole Byer]

I couldn't believe it. And I fucked it up.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And it was still good.

[Nicole Byer]

It was still good.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Wow.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. I did not fold the flour incorrectly.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

So when it baked and you cut into it, you can see hunks of flour, but it's still really good.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's great.

[Nicole Byer]

Isn't it wild that you could fuck something up and it's still delicious?

[Sasheer Zamata]

That is wild.

[Nicole Byer]

And I followed. I actually followed the directions. I didn't take any shortcuts.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

Not here.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No. Not now.

[Nicole Byer]

I took that. That left that she wanted me to. I didn't go right and go around. So you have to melt bittersweet chocolate with a bunch of butter. And she says to do it above simmering water. And I was like, what the fuck does that mean? So I was like, I think I've seen this happen before. So I put it in a glass bowl and let the water simmer. I. You. I would have just put it in the microwave and burn it and been like, whatever. But it was.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Wow.

[Nicole Byer]

It was so. It was so silky. It was so nice.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

I couldn't believe.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Good job.

[Nicole Byer]

Thank you. Thank you so much.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's really impressive.

[Nicole Byer]

I'm the barefoot Nicole.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Were you barefoot when you did it?

[Nicole Byer]

You know, I was. I was in my house and I don't wear a slipper or a sock.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You wear socks in your house? No, not since the fall of 2024 or whatever.

[Nicole Byer]

What was that? I wasn't wearing socks then either. That was 2020.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I see.

[Nicole Byer]

I believe it was October. No, it was the beginning of November 2020, because I remember Thanksgiving. I was in Mobile and was dictating to John Millhiser's now husband how to make sweet potatoes. Because I was like, I need sweet potatoes the way my mother made them. Because I'm dying. No, I can't wear socks in the house.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, okay.

[Nicole Byer]

Do you wear socks in your own home?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I do.

[Nicole Byer]

Most people do.

[Sasheer Zamata]

My tootsies get so cold,

[Nicole Byer]

I don't even turn my heat on until my feet hurt. Because sometimes, because I don't have like, like carpeting. I have rugs, so it's like a tile floors. And they'll get so cold in the winter that I'll step on them and be like, oh. I'll be like, oh, I guess I gotta turn the heat on so I'm not in pain.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, definitely.

[Nicole Byer]

Ali, do you wear socks in your home?

[Ali]

I do.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, yeah. Okay. This is like a thing. People want their dogs covered. I want my dogs free to bark. I think it's a spectrum thing for me. Oh, where you ever step on something and it's stuck to your sock and then maybe you don't like, remove that thing very, like, quickly, and then you're like, oh, let me, like, look at it. If that happens, I get very upset and I'm like, this is disgusting. Like, it really does something to me.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

I'd rather step on something barefoot.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That makes sense. Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

And I like to grip the earth with my toes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You're gripping the earth?

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

How do you walk around stepping? I don't know if I can grip.

[Nicole Byer]

I grip to make sure I'm not falling down.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, great.

[Nicole Byer]

I have bad balance.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's true. You do need all the help you can get.

[Nicole Byer]

Sometimes I'll get up from the couch and have to sit right back down cuz I'm like, I might fall over.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Do you pick things up with your toes?

[Nicole Byer]

Ew, no.

[Sasheer Zamata]

We're talking about grip.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah, I'm gripping the earth, not items.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Well, I don't know if you're like, I wanna pick that up, but I wanna bend down. You can just, boop, use your toes.

[Nicole Byer]

So did you wake up this morning and you wanted to upset me? You said, I'm gonna come to the studio. I'm gonna make her. I'm gonna make her so mad.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You want to talk about feet?

[Nicole Byer]

Well, I'm gripping the earth to walk around. I'm not gripping things.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You could, though.

[Nicole Byer]

I guess I could. Maybe I'll strengthen my toes and maybe that'll help my balance.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Exactly.

[Nicole Byer]

I have maybe a pinched nerve in my heel. I don't know how to fix it. The Internet seems to think it's plantar fasciitis, but I feel like plantar fasciitis hurts when you're walking.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I don't know.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't know either. I had a. I do know I did have plantar fasciitis for a second. That's so funny that I was like, I simply don't know. But, no, I.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Did you have firsthand experience? Actually. Did it hurt when you were walking?

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. When I would get out of bed, it would hurt so bad. And I went to a foot doctor, and look, I can't believe. This is like a repressed memory. And he gave me a cortisone shot, and then it just didn't. Never hurt again. But now. Yeah. Like, if I keep my foot straight, reflect when I'm standing on it, and then keep my legs straight and bend over to touch my toes, my little heel hurts.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hmm.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't know what to do.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Do you think massaging it would help? Theragunning it?

[Nicole Byer]

Maybe. But I'm. I don't know what to massage or theragun. Because my lower back pain is my it band or whatever. This band here. So I have to, like, massage that for my back.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Right.

[Nicole Byer]

So I'm like, do I massage the heel or the calf or, like, the ball of my. Or am I. Do I just do it all and see what happens?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I would do it all and see what happens. Gotta get there. It's a numbers game.

[Nicole Byer]

It is.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Chances are you might hit it.

[Nicole Byer]

And that's my issue about getting older. I don't mind the wrinkles. I don't mind, you know, life slowing down. It's the aches and the fucking pains.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's really annoying.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't want that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I don't want that either. I laid down last night and my neck hurt. I just, like, shifted, and I was

[Nicole Byer]

like, man, the hell that's happened to me too. Where I, like, I now in my sleep, in order to not hurt myself, I, like, protect my. I, like, woke up while I was doing this once. I sit all the way up in bed, pivot around, and lay back down. Yeah. Because I think one time I, like, was laying down and just rolled over and I was like, no, no. So now my body goes. Sit all the way up. Move your body around. Support it. Now lay back down.

[Sasheer Zamata]

So annoying. Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

I'm just, like, not here for it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. I don't know if I'll try this or not, but I was thinking recently, I was like, how can I sleep in a way where I don't feel like I'm crushing my body? Like, my bones are just, like, crushing themselves. Like, if I lay on my side, it feels like. Like, everything's like sinking into itself. And then it's like, well, now my shoulder hurts. But I was like, if I slept in a hammock, I feel like everything's like, held, you know? Like, did

[Nicole Byer]

try it. Set up a hammock in your bedroom, please.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I might.

[Nicole Byer]

I. That's. This is what. I would like to see this. I'll come over on watch. Well, you could get one of those, like ortho. I think they're orthopedic beds where there's two tracks.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

Where you sit up and you can like support your lower back with it, like going up into it and you just.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I do feel like I would be best suited to like kind of be in a chair.

[Nicole Byer]

We gotta take a break. Hi, it's Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamada, host of the podcast Best Friends.

[Sasheer Zamata]

We're here to tell you a little bit about something special coming up. Or as they say in Italiano serra speciale.

[Nicole Byer]

Mmm, no notes. You might not be able to drop everything and book a ticket to Italy, but you can go to the theater on April 10th to see you, me and Tuscany.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You, Me and Tuscany is a brand new rom com from Will Packer, the guy who produced Girls Trip and is starring Halle Bailey and Reggae John Page.

[Nicole Byer]

You, Me and Tuscany has all the ingredients of your favorite rom coms heart, huge laughs and sizzling chemistry.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Set in the enchanting vineyards of Tuscany, it's the movie escape we've been waiting for. It's the perfect film for date night or a night out with your girls. Get lost in the sauce with you, Me and Tuscany. Directed by Kat Coiro. Only in theaters April 10th. I thought GLP1s were a way to cheat weight loss, but they're a powerful healthcare tool that's now becoming more accessible than ever. With the new pill, there are many potential benefits to GLP1s for an overall health journey. In addition to weight loss, not only can patients lose weight, but they can also expect to have better lab numbers, more energy, new levels of confidence, and more benefits that go beyond the scale. If you've been thinking about trying GLP1s, a self administered shot can be intimidating. But now there's a pill that delivers comparable results that are both convenient and approachable. Ro offers the first FDA approved GLP1 pill for weight loss at the lowest cost around. The new GLP1 pill has the same weight loss ingredient as the shot and packs comparable results to the shot. It can help patients lose 14% of their body weight in a year on average. That's One daily pill for fewer cravings and feeling fuller with an innovative new formula clinically proven to maximize weight loss. The new FDA approved GLP1 pill is available at $149 for the first dose in addition to your RO membership fee and $299 a month for the higher doses. The robody membership includes access to FDA approved GLP1s, unlimited provider messaging, side effect management and more, all for just $45 for your first month and $145 per month thereafter. The ROE membership fee excludes the cost of GLP1 medication. In addition to the newly approved pillar, RO also offers a full suite of the most effective brand name FDA approved GLP1s all at the lowest cost. RO offers the lowest cost GLP1s whether you're using insurance or paying cash. After your first online visit, if you're eligible for treatment, you can expect to start your medication in less than a week if paying cash or about two weeks if using insurance. I trust this source because it's FDA approved and we like things that make people feel confident and are good for their health. Go to RO Co Best Friends to see if you're eligible for the new GLP1 pill on RO. That's RO CO Best Friends. To get started on ROE, go to RO CO Safety RO CO Safety for boxed warning and full safety information about GLP1 medications based on study and non diabetics with obesity or overweight plus a weight related condition with diet and exercise.

[Nicole Byer]

I'm back from Mattressential.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That was fast.

[Nicole Byer]

It was so fast. I zoom, zoom there. If you could have a superpower, would you rather be able to fly but you can't tell anyone or read people's minds, but only at night

[Sasheer Zamata]

fly.

[Nicole Byer]

Interesting. I don't want to know what people

[Sasheer Zamata]

are thinking at night or really anytime. I don't need to know your thoughts.

[Nicole Byer]

I picked. Or I would pick reading people's thoughts at night.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. And is it like, are you choosing whose thoughts you're reading? Or is like thoughts just come into your mind?

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, I think maybe you could choose. I don't. I don't think that far ahead.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

Okay. If you could fly or move metal or make people do what you want, what would you do?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hmm. Flying's pretty cool.

[Nicole Byer]

I pick making people do what I want.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

I want everyone to act right.

[Sasheer Zamata]

So you want to be in everyone's business and make them do what you want?

[Nicole Byer]

Well, when you put it that way. Wow. But I guess, am I just nosy? Yeah, I guess so. I really am. Nosy. There was a woman standing in the cul de sac the other day. And I was like, what is she doing? So I sat in my car longer to see what she was doing.

[Sasheer Zamata]

What was she doing?

[Nicole Byer]

I don't know. She outlasted me. I was like, I have to go inside.

[Sasheer Zamata]

She was standing there.

[Nicole Byer]

She was just standing there. It. And then, like, the park is right there. So I was like, did she come from the park?

[Sasheer Zamata]

It was.

[Nicole Byer]

It was too much. I should have just asked, what are you doing?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Good.

[Nicole Byer]

But that's rude.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Maybe if you say like that. Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

What are you doing?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Like, hey, you. You.

[Nicole Byer]

Okay. Okay. I bookmarked this in my brain to tell you, and I forgot about it for a very long time. This is the second episode we're doing today. I had a recurring dream.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

I had. I had a dream that I've already had happen again.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You said it right the first time.

[Nicole Byer]

So I've had this dream. It happened again. So again it happens to me.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I had a dream once, and then another time I had that dream again. So it was recurring, I think I've

[Nicole Byer]

had this dream maybe three, four, or five times.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

So in this dream, I have a house that is a very bright color, but the garage is on a different side of the house. And it's on a whole different street, but it's, like, connected to the house. But then if you walk past a pool and then, like, I guess into the woods, there's two more houses. And there's a man who lives in one of the houses. And he is a. Like, he hates me and he's mean to me, and he yells at me. And I was like, I'm gonna call the police on you. And he's like, and then I'll kill you.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, my gosh.

[Nicole Byer]

And it's really strange. And I don't know. And I, like, the house is very. It's very, like, visceral. And I can see it. And it's the same house. And the front door is the same and where the garages is the same. And then that man is the same, but he lives in. He either lives in one of the two houses in the woods or he lives in this, like, attached house over the garage. But he's taken over both of those.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Interesting.

[Nicole Byer]

And he won't let me take them back to do what I want with them.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, no, that's not nice at all.

[Nicole Byer]

No.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Is it scary?

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. He said he was gonna kill me.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I mean, that's pretty scary.

[Nicole Byer]

And then he, like, came in. Not this Dream, but like a dream I had before. He came into the house and was like, leave my house alone. And I was like, and it doesn't matter if you lock these doors, I can get in here. And I was like, ah. Oh. What do you think that means?

[Sasheer Zamata]

When do they start? Do you know? These are recent dreams.

[Nicole Byer]

These are over the span of years. Oh, wow. I can't remember the first time I had this dream, but it was a long time ago. And when it happened last night, I was like, oh, my God, the man's back. And the house is back.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Not the man.

[Nicole Byer]

Not that man.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I feel like an intruder in your house or like someone trying to get in your house is something about, like, privacy or, like. Like, I guess, literally feeling intruded upon or your boundaries being crossed. Allie, do you mind looking at us?

[Ali]

Yeah. It symbolizes vulnerability, anxiety, or violated personal boundaries. In your waking life, the intruder can represent unwanted, shameful, or neglected parts of yourself breaking into your consciousness. It also may indicate a fear of loss of control or unwanted influence.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Whoa.

[Nicole Byer]

I'm not feeling that right now, but maybe unconsciously I am.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

And the man who's so mean to me, he looks like the scary man who isn't scary from home alone.

[Ali]

Oh, with the shovel.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, with the show. We're recording this the day after Chinese New Year. Do you know what you are? I just moved on from my dream so quickly. I was like.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I didn't like that also. What am I?

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah. And what Chinese New Year was yesterday? What are you.

[Sasheer Zamata]

In what regard? Like, what year was I born? Like, what.

[Nicole Byer]

What do you mean? I'm a tiger.

[Ali]

Each.

[Nicole Byer]

And so I believe each year of Chinese culture is assigned an animal.

[Sasheer Zamata]

We were both born in the year of the tiger.

[Nicole Byer]

So deeply upsetting that I was like, you were born in a different. Why did you think it was different? I don't know. We're the same age. My God, The brain I live in is exhausting. Well, we're both tigers.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes.

[Nicole Byer]

This is gonna be a good year for us.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, yes.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Great. I'm glad.

[Nicole Byer]

I cannot give you any specifics

[Sasheer Zamata]

because

[Nicole Byer]

I read it yesterday and it's out.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But you got the important parts, which are that it's gonna be a good year.

[Nicole Byer]

It's gonna be a very good year.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I'm glad.

[Nicole Byer]

I can't believe how much I didn't like the answer about my dream. That I was like, we'll never talk about that again.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Truly.

[Ali]

There was another part that was good if. Yeah. Depending on how you react to the. The scary Guy. If you're trying to stop them or if you feel helpless, that can mean two different things.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't feel helpless, but I just go, well, all right. He doesn't want to leave.

[Ali]

Okay, then you are. Okay. It doesn't have anything for that one.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's like. I mean, it kind of feels helpless because you're not like trying, you've given up. Like, you're like submitting to what's happened.

[Nicole Byer]

Okay, yeah, so I'm helpless.

[Ali]

It says then that that reflects anxiety or powerlessness over a situation.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't like that either, but this is terrible.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I mean, there probably wasn't gonna be a good reason why you're having a dream about someone breaking into your house and taking over and trying to kill you.

[Nicole Byer]

I was hoping it'd be like, gifts

[Sasheer Zamata]

are coming, good fortune.

[Nicole Byer]

Someone's gonna break in and leave you some treats.

[Ali]

But people who are born in the year of Taikar have personalities rooted in courage, strength, ambition, and really positive energy.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah. This is gonna be our year.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Great. Can you see why the year of the horse is a good year for people born in the year of the tiger?

[Ali]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

That way I don't have to remember anything.

[Sasheer Zamata]

She's a finger princess.

[Nicole Byer]

I really am.

[Ali]

Okay, so the year of the horse is excellent for those born in the year of the tiger because the two signs share a natural, highly supportive resonance, creating a high octane year for growth, career advancement and increased wealth. As a fire year, it provides momentum for the wood based tiger, while their similar bold, independent and action oriented personalities allow tigers to seize opportunities and lead effectively.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I like that.

[Nicole Byer]

Right? Isn't that fun?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Wealth, support.

[Nicole Byer]

I wonder what your girlfriend is. The nice man's a horse.

[Sasheer Zamata]

83.

[Nicole Byer]

What?

[Sasheer Zamata]

No, 89.

[Nicole Byer]

I was like, 83.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No, 89.

[Ali]

Year of the snake.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay. We just had a year. Last year was the year of snake, which was like, about shedding and stuff like that.

[Ali]

The. The year of the snake, 2025, symbolized wisdom, transformation, intelligence and introspection. It was a time for shedding old ha. Planning and focusing on internal growth rather than outward action.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole Byer]

I love Chinese New Year.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

There's so many rules. You're not supposed to wash your hair, take out the trash, give people money, go to your parents house if you're married.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, wow. That's.

[Nicole Byer]

That's a very specific rule. Isn't it funny that that's what I retain?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

I was like, good fortune, don't know anything else.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Well, you love rules.

[Nicole Byer]

I do love rules. And I was like reading about the year of the tiger, One of the things I retained was, it literally was like, chill out about your rules. Like, just let things happen. I was like, oh, my God, this is annoying. Everywhere I go, people are like, stop being so rigid.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And you're like, no, I love rules. Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, wow.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It'll happen when it happens.

[Nicole Byer]

Hey, thank you. I appreciate that. Thank you for giving me the space and the grace.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I'm here to give you the space and the grace.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. Okay. Are you in town next week?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Nope.

[Nicole Byer]

Dang. I gotta see. Send help.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, yeah, Maybe when we're in Chicago. Okay. During the day.

[Nicole Byer]

Okay. Yeah. Then we gotta plan our romantic getaway.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes. The New York trip is gonna happen.

[Nicole Byer]

It's gonna happen.

[Sasheer Zamata]

The New York, New Jersey extravaganza. From the Poconos to the big city

[Nicole Byer]

and everything in the middle. Middletown, New Jersey. I'm coming for you. Middletown. And I'll get my spicy chicken. I have to figure out how to get it. Yeah, the french fries were also pretty good. I'm gonna be so upset if I do get this spicy chicken and it's not as delicious as I remember, which is like with the toaster strudel. You're like, I don't know if I'd like that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, that's why I want to try. I want to have a nice memory. Because if I try, I'm like, my childhood was a lie. I had bad judgment back then.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't want my whole schooling to be a lie.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It probably is still good.

[Nicole Byer]

I think people were writing and saying

[Sasheer Zamata]

they were good, right?

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, did I tell you that Someone told me what the cookies were? No, Otis Spunkmeyer.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, that's a good brand.

[Nicole Byer]

You know her?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, it was at my school, too.

[Nicole Byer]

Every school has Otis Funkmeyer.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's just two schools. I don't know.

[Nicole Byer]

Every school in America has Otis Bunkmeyer.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It must be every school.

[Nicole Byer]

That's crazy. Ally, did you have Otis Bunkmire?

[Ali]

No, I've never heard of it.

[Nicole Byer]

Every. Even Ali's school had it and she just wasn't informed. What a funny name.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's very funny.

[Nicole Byer]

I wonder if, like, famous Amos if there was a notice.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, that took me a while to understand. So there actually was a Amos?

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah, he was a black man. Oh, I think Allie hit it.

[Ali]

So, no, Otis Funkmayer is not a real person. The brand name was created by the 12 year old daughter of the film founder, Kenneth B. Rawlings, who established the Cookie in Oakland, California in 1977. The whimsical name Was created by combining Otis Sistrunk with Orville Redenbacher.

[Nicole Byer]

I don't see that. I don't see that. I don't see that whatsoever.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No.

[Nicole Byer]

And then was Famous Amos a black man? Sometimes I'd be saying stuff that's lies. Yes.

[Ali]

Oh, Wallace Wally Amos Jr. Was black. He was a pioneering black entreprene and former talent agent who launched his famous cookie brand in 1975.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I love that.

[Nicole Byer]

Oh, the 70s was a big time for cookies. Lotus Bunk Myers, 77. Mrs. Fields, will you tell me what year she's 77? Whoa, whoa. The cookie boom.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That really was a cookie boom.

[Nicole Byer]

That's wild.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

Somebody better get up in that and give me a full book report about it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Give you a book rewards.

[Nicole Byer]

Well, I want to know if there's more than three brands that were created. Whoa.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I like that.

[Nicole Byer]

That's wild. The 70s was all about drugs and love and cookies.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes.

[Nicole Byer]

I'm gonna time travel. That's where I'm going to.

[Sasheer Zamata]

70s.

[Nicole Byer]

1977. Let me get them cookies.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, they're like, you need a little snack while you're high.

[Nicole Byer]

Just a little something sweet to bring.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But like you've been tearing it up on the disco floor.

[Nicole Byer]

You've been tearing it up on the disco fl.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Have a little sweet treat.

[Nicole Byer]

Have a little sweet treat. Oh, these Otis Spunk Myers are out of sight. Let's answer questions.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Let's answer questions.

[Ali]

Okay, this says from Lindsay. Hi, I have a super important question for Nicole. Can you please explain how car brands can sell the same model of a car for years but drastically change what the car looks like? For example, a Ford Mustang from the 60s looks wildly different than a Mustang made today. Why is it even still called a Mustang if it looks like such a different car? Is it just an advertising thing? At what point is a Mustang no longer a Mustang? Ah, I've been thinking about this for years. Please help. Thank you. You're all the best. And I love the podcast.

[Nicole Byer]

Unfortunately, I simply don't know the answer. But I will say I do think the electric Mustang is only a Mustang in name and speed, but to me, that's not a Mustang. I. If I were to make an educated guess, I would assume that car brands are just revamping models for the time. Like a 60s Mustang looks like a 60s car. It looks like a. Ooh, I can't think of the name of Looks like a Charger. It looks like other 60s muscle cars. And then the 80s. It looks like a Caprice. It looks like other 80s cars. And then the 90s, it like looks. They look like, like a, like a Pontiac Thunderbird. They all like have the same. They all share the same DNA of the time period. That's what I think.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. They probably also. It's probably brand recognition too.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. Whereas, like. Oh, yeah, I know, I know.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I know what a Mustang is. I know what a Bronco is. My dad had this thing, so it's like, even if it looks different, you know, like the name of it, you're like, I'm familiar with this, so I'll get it.

[Nicole Byer]

I think so too. Like the Jeep Wagoneer came back. And an old Wagoneer is a big, sturdy, chunky car. And then what they brought back is a big, sturdy, chunky. It's huge.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, wow.

[Nicole Byer]

So I think, yeah, I think it's brand recognition. And then like the Bronco came back. That's a big, strong car. I do wish they leaned into a little bit of the classic. I think it's 62 to 76. That is like their like the most popular model of that car. I wish they dipped a little bit into it. But they didn't. But yeah, that's my educated guess.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's a good guess. Solved.

[Nicole Byer]

Solved.

[Ali]

Hi, Nicole and Sasheer. Reaching out with a friendship query. My dad died pretty unexpectedly a few months ago, and while some of my friends have been incredible and supportive, some of them have not been showing up in the ways that I really expected them to. One friend in particular was really there for me a couple of years ago when I went through a breakup. But since my dad died, he keeps canceling plans after he canceled multiple times. I kind of gave up trying and he hasn't reached out since. Is it worth it? Trying to rekindle the friendship. It makes me really sad. Why are people so weird about death? For context, I'm also in my 20s and most of my friends parents haven't died yet, if that makes a difference. Any advice would be so appreciated. Loved seeing Nicole at the Wilbur and sadly was so ill that I missed the Shira's show at laugh Boston in 2022. Very grateful to both of Yalls. Effervescent effervescence during some hard times.

[Nicole Byer]

I love that. Four years ago.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes.

[Nicole Byer]

I couldn't see.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You can never forget about it.

[Nicole Byer]

Never forget. Death is weird for people who haven't experienced it. Yeah, like I remember one of my first stand up jokes was about my dead parents that like went over poorly. People were like, ugh. And it was like nobody could really relate in the audience because they were like in their 20s and still had parents. I think if this friendship is worth it, I think it's worth explaining that, you know, I miss you. If you find it hard to support me in this time, I just would love to hang out. Like, I don't. You don't have to, like, listen to me. I don't know. I think it's worth saying I miss you. I like this friendship. Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, definitely. And maybe I don't. You know, I don't know how you're communicating with this friend. But sometimes even aside from death, you'll realize certain friends are good for certain things. And you can put them in different categories in your brain where, like, okay, this person's great for, like, light fun hangs or brunch. This person's great for partying or, like, going out at night.

[Nicole Byer]

This friend's good for funerals.

[Sasheer Zamata]

This is my funeral friend. Or, like, this person I can get deep with.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And some people don't have that capacity. Also, like, yeah, your friends in your 20s probably have. Haven't had anyone close to them pass yet, but they will. But even, like, there's people in your. In their 30s that. Who also don't, like, have the capacity or just don't know how to talk about it or approach it or. Or they get uncomfortable or whatever. Like, it. You just don't know. Some people just can't handle, like, that kind of stuff. So you could have a talk and be like, I would like you in my life still.

[Nicole Byer]

Or, like, you know, I want to

[Sasheer Zamata]

hang out with you and maybe ask, like, is there a reason they've been pulling away? And if there isn't, or if you don't feel comfortable having a conversation, you could just hang out with them in different ways. It's like, okay, I think maybe they're not, like, able to meet me at this place because also, like, you don't want to share that part of you to people who cannot hold that space for you. Yeah. Because that's also unsatisfying for you. So if you have found, hopefully you have found people in your life who you can talk to about your dad or, like, loss, and they'll. Even if they don't understand, they can at least allow you to have that space and grieve, but you can't get that out of people who don't want to give it.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah, I agree. I also think therapy is very useful tool when you lose somebody, because

[Sasheer Zamata]

I

[Nicole Byer]

don't think it's fair to dump all of your sadness onto somebody or only depend on friends because it's like, yes, they're here to support, but also, like, a professional can really support you and help you through it. Yeah. I remember when my mom died, one of her adult friends said to me, a child, yeah, I'm not gonna go to the funeral. The funeral is just not my thing. And I was like, not your thing? You think it's my thing? I'm 16. What are you talking.

[Sasheer Zamata]

This is your friend?

[Nicole Byer]

Yes. And it was really interesting to find, like, adults who couldn't, like, deal with things. And when my dad died, it was like the same, like, kind of the same thing. Like, adults would be like, oh, no. You know, if you need anything, let me know. Then when you do tell them you need something, they're like, oh, I just. This is a bad day for me. And you're like, you actually didn't mean that. Yeah. And you can't take it from it personally. You just have to go, all right, that's not the person who's here to help me. Somebody else can help me.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

But it is hard. It's hard to figure out who those people are in your life.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. And I would imagine there's also like group therapy sessions or like, like different groups. There probably is like a young adult, like children of parents who have passed kind of group where you can like, like talk to people who have the same kind of experience. And that'll probably be a lot more satisfying than talking to your friends who.

[Nicole Byer]

Who don't have that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Who don't have that experience. And maybe you'll make friends there too. Who knows? But like, it might feel more satisfying to share with people who get it and, and hear stories from people who are experiencing this too, and that, you know, hopefully you can have all of it. You can get. Get support from your friends, but also get support from other people who hopefully have a better perspective on it.

[Nicole Byer]

Hell yeah, dude.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hell yeah, dude.

[Nicole Byer]

Solved. Solved. Let's do one more dude.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hell yeah.

[Ali]

Okay. This is called Help me understand my friend. Hi, Nicole and Sashir. My name is Stanley and I'm 21. I have a friend who will call Megan. Something that you should know about Megan is she's a little difficult to talk to and is stubborn with her opinions. She always has to be right and she likes to stick to her own opinions and thoughts.

[Nicole Byer]

Thoughts.

[Ali]

She speaks her mind and doesn't seem to care about others feelings with what she has to say. In other words, if you were to tell her your body hurts, she'll be the type to tell you that pain is in your head and to grow up. If you try to explain yourself, she will say you're making excuses. Although sometimes she's just telling it as it is. It can be very annoying and ruin the vibe. Megan can definitely be fun to hang out with, but when it comes to texting her, it's hard to read her tone because she barely uses emojis. And I can't tell if she's emotional upset from what I said or what the emotional tone of the text is. Her responses usually seem to come out mean or dry. But according to her, aren't we barely had time to hang out because I moved away and we don't text as much anymore. I try to text her to see if she wants to hang out, but she always leaves me on red or barely replies with anything. How would you guys deal with a friend who is stubborn and hard headed? Or even with a friend who thinks they are superior than everyone? Your advice would be much appreciated.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I mean with the texting that just is hard because people text differently and you can't tell. I thought your text used to be pretty harsh because you would use periods all the time. And I'm not the only one who thought that.

[Nicole Byer]

Everyone thought that. I was like, that's just good grammar.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Like, yes, period. Like,

[Nicole Byer]

what did I do? It's just good grammar.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes. But in text messaging this, that's like a less formal format. Yes. Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

You aren't the only one.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. Which I guess they've maybe talked about it and the friend was like, no, that's just how I text or whatever. I guess just don't take it personally.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah. I also think the like the communication dying down a little bit because they moved away might just be a blessing in disguise. This person might not need to be in your life. What is it? People are in your life for a season for a reason. So I don't know, maybe the season's done.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

Especially if you feel frustrated by them. I think it's a good, a good thing to like take stock, like be like, why am I friends with this person?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

What are the good things they add to my life? Do I need to continue being friends with this person? And if there aren't enough reasons, then I think you could let it fizzle out.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. And some people aren't good at maintaining that same level of friendship that you had when you leave town. Like if you're no longer in front of them and available to them as easily as you used to be. Not that they like don't want to be your friend. Or like, can't. But it just is different. Like, they're like, I can't stop by and see you, or like, we can't go to the movies together. So, like. Like, to them, it might not be a conscious thing. It was like, oh, I just don't know what to talk to you about. So for them, for Megan, it might be harder to reach out or respond

[Nicole Byer]

because they're like, well, we don't hang out anymore. What are we gonna talk about?

[Sasheer Zamata]

What are we gonna talk about? And also maybe like, it feels like if we do talk, it has to be a catch up. And maybe they don't have the time for that or.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Or the energy for that.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah. I think if you want to remain friends, you can ask how. How does. How does a long distance friendship work for you? I don't know.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I think.

[Nicole Byer]

I think. I think let it go does sound

[Sasheer Zamata]

like Megan's a lot.

[Nicole Byer]

A little tough.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. And if she's our. If she on her own is already, like, kind of receding.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah. If I said my body hurts and someone said, it's in your brain, I'd be like, ma', am, my body. If I fell down in front of them, they're like, it's in your brain, people. I'd be so mad.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Mind over matter. Mind over matter.

[Nicole Byer]

Get up. Get up. Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And also just sounds like this person's young, so.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Which I guess the way they learn is by people saying, hey, you can validate my experience, but it all depends if you want to do that or not. You're not responsible for this person learning.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah. So, well. Well, should we do another? Is that it?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Let's do one more.

[Nicole Byer]

Let's do one more.

[Ali]

First, I want to say that you are the most hilarious, beautiful, and stylish women on earth. Thank you for this wonderful podcast. Second, I'll get into my query. I've been feeling distant from my friend D for a few years. She says she loves me and calls me her sister and best friend. She frequently says yes to my invitations to spend time together, but rarely actually shows up. She almost always ends up texting me with last minute excuses for why she isn't coming. I understand that things come up, but after this happened consistently for a couple years, I mostly stopped extending those regular invites to protect myself and my feelings. I found that if I didn't reach out, we rarely spoke. Making things worse, I often run into D at our mutual friends events or see photos of her out with other friends on Instagram.

[Nicole Byer]

Them.

[Ali]

The reason I've chosen to distance myself instead of talk to D about my feelings is that she's confided in me that in the past about experiencing depression that causes her to want to stay at home. I've told her that I'm always there for her in those times. Also, she may be experiencing financial hardship as she has asked me to borrow a few hundred dollars here and there. She's always paid me back, except for the most recent time when she said she'd pay me back the following week, but I haven't heard from her about that again. I recently decided to try again with Dee. I had several extra tickets to an NFL game, which Dee and I attended together in the past. I invited her and her partner to attend with some of our mutual friends and me. I let her know that I was bringing a cooler with drinks and food for everyone to share so she'd know there were no costs involved without me mentioning money. I let her know that I'd love to see her and had missed spending time with her. Dee gave me an emphatic yes and said things like I can't wait to see you, I need sister time and I can't wait to hug my best friend. Fast forward to game day. She texted me early in the morning to say her partner wasn't feeling well and they weren't coming. I was beyond hurt and couldn't understand why she didn't just come without him, as we've done many times before. I was very upset and didn't want to say anything that I would regret, so I chose to just text back okay in that moment. I haven't really spoken to D since this occurred. I'm torn about whether or not I should talk to her about how I'm feeling. I feel bad having an uncomfortable conversation about her not showing up when she's confided in me about her depression. On the other hand, I feel sad that she doesn't seem to want to spend time with me and I'm just the person she texts when she needs to borrow money. Do you think I should initiate a conversation about this or do you think I should continue setting boundaries and bringing up Bring it up eventually if the time is right. Thank you, I think.

[Nicole Byer]

Have a conversation maybe. D. I think Dee's behaving poorly, but also I think maybe Dee finds comfort in this friendship and it's like I can come to this person when I'm down. I also tell them that, like, I think it's easy for maybe Dee to cancel because they've confided that they suffer from depression and it's hard to go out. So it's like you're the person I can cancel on because, you know, I get sad. Yeah. But that being said, that's not fair to our friend who's writing in. But maybe it's like, hey, maybe you don't invite Dee to outdoor things. Maybe it's like, like movie hangs inside where she doesn't. Or D doesn't have to feel pressure to go out. I don't know. This one's tough.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's tough. Yeah. Because I was like, sounds like the person who wrote in is doing a really good job of like trying to figure out what is where D can hang out. That's like low pressure. You don't have to pay money. There will be other people. So it's not necessarily like a one on one. We're getting dinner and downloading. Like, Yeah, I. In my old age.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I'm kind of over trying to convince people to hang out with me. Like, either you want it or you don't. And I'm not in the business of like, like trying to bet, like begging to like, be in places I'm not wanted, so. Yeah. But not that this is what the writer's doing, but like, like if Dee's continuously bailing, that would make me feel like you probably don't want to hang out right now. And maybe it doesn't mean forever.

[Nicole Byer]

Huh.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And it may not have anything to do with this person at all. Like, it could be like, I mean, you and I have talked about people in our lives who used to be in our lives a lot and are currently not. And like, being like, what's going on? Did we do something? And it's like, maybe we remind them of something they owe one thing about. Or like, maybe like we represent something that we don't even know what that could be. But they're like, I just don't want to be around this right now. And that's okay. Like, we don't have to force it. Like, if it. Who knows what the thing is. But I, I no longer try to investigate. I'm just kind of like, you told me with your actions how you feel. So I'm here if you want to hang. If you don't want to hang. I'm, I'm, I, I'll leave it to you.

[Nicole Byer]

Yes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

To be the one to initiate, because I have obviously initiated a bunch and you know, I want to hang out. So.

[Nicole Byer]

Yeah, I think that is one way to do it. I also do kind of feel like Dee's using our friend.

[Sasheer Zamata]

The fact that she's asked for money

[Nicole Byer]

for money and not made it back, Paying it back and then, like, not hanging out and cancel. Canceling, like, that all sucks.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole Byer]

I think that warrants a conversation that's like. So you're asking me for money? I know you've been depressed. I keep inviting you to things. You could have came to the football game alone. These are my grievances. How do you feel? Yeah, I don't know this D. Yeah, something's fishy about d Something's fishy about d Something stanking with D what is it? There's a rotten fish in Denmark. It's a Shakespearean quote, and I think it's wrong.

[Ali]

Something's rotten in Denmark.

[Sasheer Zamata]

There's a rotten fish in Denmark. There's one rotten fish in Denmark.

[Nicole Byer]

Someone's gotta find it. Stinking up that friendship. Ooh, the mind is wild. Solved. Solved. If you have any questions or queries, we got a phone number.

[Ali]

323-238-6554.

[Sasheer Zamata]

We also have an email. It's Nicole and sasheermail.com.

[Nicole Byer]

well, Sasheer, this has been fun.

[Sasheer Zamata]

This has been fun.

[Nicole Byer]

I hope we do it again someday.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I have a feeling we will. Goodbye.

[Nicole Byer]

Goodbye. Best Friends is a production of Headgum Studios.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Our producer is Ali Khan.

[Nicole Byer]

Our executive producer is Anya Khanovskaya.

[Sasheer Zamata]

The show is edited, mixed and interviewed. Pioneered by Rochelle Chen.

[Ali]

That was a hit gum podcast.

[Sasheer Zamata]

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