Sasheer Might Try Bouldering (w/ Tawny Newsome)

Summary

Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata

Episode: "Sasheer Might Try Bouldering" (with Tawny Newsome)

Release Date: October 29, 2025
Guest: Tawny Newsome

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Episode Overview

This episode dives into the friendships, hobbies, and hilarious personal quirks of Nicole, Sasheer, and special guest Tawny Newsome—comedian, actor, and podcast host. The trio chat about fitness obsessions (especially bouldering and weightlifting), the unpredictable behaviors of dogs (and their owners), nostalgia for early friendships, and why it's fine to be mediocre at hobbies. They balance vulnerable discussions about body image and boundaries with classic goofball humor, all wrapped up in the comforting dynamic of best friends just hanging out.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Comedy and Genuine Enthusiasm

• Nicole, Sasheer, and Tawny discuss how comedians are usually assumed to be sarcastic—even when expressing real love for things. Tawny notes, “Sometimes when you love something, the intensity is so much that people are like—‘This has to be a joke.’” (03:01, Tawny Newsome)
• Nicole shares how Ben Schwartz thought she was only “doing a bit” about loving Sonic.

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2. Hyperfixations and Gym Life

• Tawny admits her current “hyperfixation” is on fitness—"I will go so hard on a thing for, like, six months and then I'll be like, never speak to me about that thing again. But right now…it’s the gym, lifting, and bouldering." (03:31, Tawny Newsome)
• The trio swap workout routines, with Nicole discussing her injury from pole fitness, and Tawny sharing knowledge about “hypertrophy” and “sarcopenia” (“That would be such a good drag name, actually.” (05:08, Tawny Newsome)).
• They debate the merits of at-home weights vs. a gym and the wonders of adjustable kettlebells.

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3. Bouldering & Outdoor Activities

• Tawny explains the basics of bouldering and why it appeals to “the weirdos”: “First of all, it feels very like…it feels like the weirdos. It's a bunch of queer people. A lot of people alone…with a huge set of headphones, just reading a book in between while they rest. And then they just go scurry up a thing. I was like, I like this energy.” (12:04, Tawny Newsome)
• Nicole contemplates trying bouldering, relating it to pole fitness strength.

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4. Making Friends as Adults (in Fitness Spaces)

• Tawny states, “I would not talk to a person [in the bouldering gym]…I want to go with my boyfriend or alone.” (12:30, Tawny Newsome)
• Nicole describes how pole classes can lead to acquaintances but rarely deeper friendships. Sasheer adds, “Workout class does seem intimidating…You could just go in, work out, go home.” (13:44, Sasheer Zamata)

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5. Body Image & Dysmorphia

• Tawny: "Doesn't every woman over 35 have body dysmorphia?" (14:22, Tawny Newsome)
• Nicole reveals hers is inverted—she always thinks she’s smaller than she is. “In my head, I'm like Thumbelina.” (14:24, Nicole Byer)
• All reflect on the 2000s and warped beauty standards. “How do any of us live and like ourselves after going through that?” (15:25, Tawny Newsome)

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6. Physical Therapy (or Not)

• Nicole is skeptical of formal PT: “No, I don't do that…I just don't think it'd be helpful for me. I think I could just figure it out on my own.” (17:47, Nicole Byer)
• She describes self-directed rehab and gets gentle pushback (and understanding) from Tawny and Sasheer.

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7. Outdoor Group Activities (or: Killing Time According to Teen Vogue)

• Research Assistant suggests options besides hiking: nature zines, sculpture gardens, geocaching. Geocaching is quickly vetoed—"No, we can't go looking for treasure in Los Angeles. It will be syringes." (22:12, Tawny Newsome)
• They discuss the ethics (and weirdness) of cemetery outings: "If I ever got a text that was like, do you want to go to the cemetery? I'd be like, nah, dude, no. No, thank you." (22:33, Nicole Byer)
• Sasheer shares a (respectful?) scavenger hunt in a cemetery.

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8. Personal Boundaries and Friendship Communication

• Tawny admits: "I want too much info from my friends…I chronically tell people not enough information all the time." (26:47, Tawny Newsome/ Nicole Byer)
• They talk about sharing locations, boundaries about honesty with friends, and the sometimes awkward dance of telling the truth about plans (“I’m not available.” “What are you doing?” “She will not be arriving.” (25:39, Sasheer Zamata))

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9. Defining Memories and Core Friendship Moments

• Tawny recalls forming a best friendship in Chicago: “We became very good friends. And anytime I've told her that story, she's like—‘I said that?’ And everyone else around her is like, that sounds like you.” (39:42, Tawny Newsome, about Bethany Thomas)
• Sasheer reminisces about “The Chatterboxes,” her first best-friend duo, and attempts at sustaining a pen-pal connection (32:18–33:17).
• Nicole’s pool-centric childhood friendships and her mother's unique brand of discipline: “She said, the rules would be you can’t swim alone, but I know you. You’d bring your stuffed animals outside and go, I’m not alone. And I said, you got me there.” (34:26, Nicole Byer)

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10. Allowing Mediocrity in Hobbies

• Tawny: “Why do we live in this grindset fucking culture…where everybody has to be, like, top of their fucking game and it has to be content? Back in the day, people just used to do needlepoint.” (43:14, Tawny Newsome)
• Nicole: “I like being mediocre at several things.” (42:39, Nicole Byer)

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11. Protective Energy, Gender, and Mosh Pits

• Tawny describes being a protective “force field” for smaller women in a mosh pit: “As a woman of size, and now, because I've been in the gym, I feel very strong…” (55:01, Tawny Newsome)
• They riff on Southwest’s old “passenger of size” terminology.

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12. Quirky Anecdotes & Memorable Bits

• Nicole steals persimmons: The ethics of taking fruit over the fence vs. just knocking on a neighbor’s door. (“Have you had a Japanese persimmon?”)
• Parasocial podcasting: How friends/family act weird after listening to your podcast—"You can get a live podcast direct to your [phone]!" (65:50, Nicole Byer)
• Role-play of asking a neighbor for olives results in awkward hilarity. (59:08–61:40)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• "Sometimes when you love something, the intensity is so much that people are like—‘This has to be a joke.’ Or else my sense of self is, like, eroding."
  — Tawny Newsome (03:01)

• "Women, we have to lift weights so our bones don't turn to butter."
  — Tawny Newsome (04:06)

• "That would be such a good drag name, actually. Sarcopenia."
  — Tawny Newsome (05:08)

• "Hiking sticks are really good for your knees…Anyone who's not a mountain goat should be using trekking poles."
  — Tawny Newsome (10:42)

• "I just realized I asked a question that made me maybe sound like a serial killer: ‘How do you just be nice in public?’"
  — Tawny Newsome (13:32)

• "Doesn't every woman over 35 have body dysmorphia?"
  — Tawny Newsome (14:22)

• "In my head, I’m like Thumbelina."
  — Nicole Byer (14:24)

• "No, I don’t do [physical therapy]. I just don’t think it’d be helpful for me. I think I could just figure it out on my own."
  — Nicole Byer (17:47)

• "No, we can't go looking for treasure in Los Angeles. It will be syringes."
  — Tawny Newsome (22:12)

• "I chronically tell people not enough information all the time."
  — Nicole Byer (26:50)

• "I want too much info from my friends. I want details. I want what you’re nervous about!"
  — Tawny Newsome (26:47)

• "Why do we live in this grindset fucking culture…Back in the day, people just used to do needlepoint."
  — Tawny Newsome (43:14)

• "The number of times I'm like, I've been robbed—and the perpetrator was other purse."
  — Tawny Newsome (54:18)

• "As a woman of size…now because I've been in the gym, I feel very strong."
  — Tawny Newsome (55:01)

• "Fruit’s gonna let you know when it's not ready for you."
  — Tawny Newsome (63:09)

• "When I send people voice notes that get a little too long, I do call them personal pan podcasts."
  — Tawny Newsome (66:01)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Comedians and Sincerity: 02:49–03:21
• Gym Obsessions & Bouldering: 03:31–09:29
• Bouldering & Gym Social Scenes: 12:04–13:44
• Body Image Conversations: 14:22–15:29
• Physical Therapy Discussion: 17:46–18:59
• Group Outdoor Activities / Geocaching: 20:28–23:18
• Honest Friendship Communication: 25:02–27:14
• First Best Friends Memory: 32:18–35:49
• Best Friendship Bonding Stories: 39:42–43:14
• Hobbies & Mediocrity: 43:14–44:43
• Mosh Pits & Protective Instincts: 54:59–56:04
• Fruit Thievery & Neighborly Ethics: 58:40–62:05
• Parasocial Podcasting Weirdness: 64:44–65:50
• Farewells & Plugs: 66:15–68:11

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Final Thoughts

This episode is a perfect encapsulation of what makes Best Friends so beloved: open-hearted friendship, no-holds-barred vulnerability, laugh-out-loud banter, and relatable quirks. Whether it’s discussing osteoporosis, mosh pits, or the surreal etiquette of asking your neighbor for olives, Nicole, Sasheer, and Tawny deliver both humor and heart.

Recommended if you:

• Love hearing about real friendships and adulting
• Are curious (or obsessed) with women getting ripped
• Enjoy playful, tangential comedy that never feels mean

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Transcript

[Tawny Newsom]

This is a Headgum podcast. This is a Headgum podcast.

[Nicole]

Say we're ready, and then. And then we're not gonna tell you.

[Tawny Newsom]

I like a surprise. Is anything gonna fall?

[Nicole]

Who knows? Wait, that's a funny thing to do to people.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No, it's not.

[Nicole]

Just something fall on soft things.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, okay.

[Nicole]

Just like, rig something soft fall down on somebody. Like a bunch of little boo boos.

[Tawny Newsom]

A bunch of lace.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay, now they're ready.

[Nicole]

Okay. Hi, Sasheer.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hi, Nicole.

[Nicole]

We have someone here. We do.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's our good friend Tahni Newsom.

[Nicole]

Hi.

[Sasheer Zamata]

She stars opposite Kevin Hart and Wesley Snipes in the Netflix limited series True Story. True Story was a series regular in the Steve Carell and Greg Daniels Netflix series Space Force Force. She voices the lead character. Oh, can you say this for me?

[Tawny Newsom]

Ensign Beckett Mariner.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Ensign Beckett Mariner on the Star Trek animated series, Star Trek. Lower decks for Paramount, it's Althea, Donnie.

[Nicole]

Beep. Bo bop, boo bop, bop, bop, bop.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hello.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay. Space.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Space stuff was happening.

[Tawny Newsom]

That was Madea scatting and starts a.

[Nicole]

D. I would watch Madea Goes to Space.

[Sasheer Zamata]

How have they not done that yet?

[Nicole]

I don't know. I think they're trying to keep it grounded.

[Tawny Newsom]

No, no, it seems insane. They wrote it, they filmed it, and they shelved it because they, like, released something they weren't supposed to in it. It's happened.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's. Yeah.

[Nicole]

I do want to see Madea's family vacation. I think that's the newest one.

[Tawny Newsom]

Does she play all of them a la the Clumps?

[Nicole]

No, I don't think so because Madea's just Madea and her brother. Or Tyler Perry plays Medea and Madea's brother.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay.

[Nicole]

Then sometimes will be Tyler Perry or a character in it. It's very confusing.

[Tawny Newsom]

Cool, cool, cool.

[Nicole]

But, yeah, I think they shot the Madea family vacation one at Atlantis in the Bahamas.

[Tawny Newsom]

Really?

[Nicole]

I think so. Oh, that's funny, right?

[Tawny Newsom]

Who else is in the family? And why didn't we get those casting calls?

[Nicole]

I don't know. I never get casting calls for Tyler Perry. Me either.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Not either.

[Nicole]

And I talk about him so much.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, maybe we found out why.

[Nicole]

Well, no, I love him.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, okay.

[Nicole]

It's usually pretty positive.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay.

[Nicole]

I love him.

[Tawny Newsom]

Do you find, though, that as a comedian, even when you talk about something positively, people are like, she's making fun of me. And sometimes I'm like, no, I'm earnest. I love this thing.

[Nicole]

Yes. I mean, Ben Schwartz thought I was mocking him or doing a bit about how much I Love Sonic, but no, I love Sonic.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Sometimes when you love something, the intensity is so much that people are like.

[Sasheer Zamata]

This has to be a joke.

[Tawny Newsom]

It has to be. Or else my sense of self is, like, eroding. I need this to be a joke.

[Nicole]

I think I just. I'm very enthusiastic. Yes.

[Tawny Newsom]

I love that about you. Hey.

[Nicole]

Thank you.

[Tawny Newsom]

Mm.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And I think there's, like, a assumption that comedians are usually trying to undercut something.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Like, we can't take anything seriously because.

[Tawny Newsom]

We usually are and we usually can't. So people are fair to think that about us. But then sometimes I'm like, no, I just want to be a sweet softie. Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Are you enthusiastic about anything right now?

[Tawny Newsom]

Ooh. So many things. Oh, I love to hyper fixate.

[Nicole]

Ooh.

[Tawny Newsom]

My therapist says as long as I'm hyper fixating on relatively healthy things, it's okay to have such a large imbalance because I will go so hard on a thing for, like, six months and then I'll be like, never speak to me about that thing again. But right now, it's actually lasting a while. Right now I'm very in the gym. I'm very into fitness. I've been rock climbing. I've been doing. I've always been a hiker, but now I've really been, like, supplementing it with, like, straight up lifting weights. Women. We have to lift weights so our bones don't turn to butter.

[Sasheer Zamata]

This is true butter.

[Tawny Newsom]

Our bones are going to turn to.

[Nicole]

Butter into Paula Deen's favorite thing.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yes, we will, but we'll be less delicious. We have to do it as we age. We have to lift the heaviest things.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, no. I can't believe it.

[Nicole]

Yeah, I do it.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

I've been out. I haven't been lifting because I hurt my. Who's this? What is this?

[Tawny Newsom]

That's the inside of your elbow.

[Nicole]

Yes, I hurt my elbow doing pull.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay.

[Nicole]

So I'm taking a sabbatical from lifting the heavy stuff.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay.

[Nicole]

I have a 50 pound kettlebell that I squat with at my house. Hell, yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Why? Wait, what happened?

[Nicole]

It's so hard.

[Tawny Newsom]

Why'd you get sad?

[Nicole]

It's so hard. My trainer, Ben, who lives in the uk, he's always like, you have to go. You have to go.

[Tawny Newsom]

Wait, wait.

[Nicole]

He's not English, he's Scottish. You have to go to failure.

[Tawny Newsom]

That's Irish.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Like, Irish. Yeah.

[Nicole]

Nicole, you have to go to failure.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And what are you saying? Failure?

[Nicole]

Yes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You have to go to failure.

[Nicole]

You have to lift to failure, otherwise you're not doing anything or you could.

[Tawny Newsom]

Lift within two reps of failure. Depends on if your goal is hypertrophy or just preventing sarcopenia. See, I'm in sarcopenia. That would be such a good drag name, actually.

[Nicole]

Yeah, it sounded like a person.

[Tawny Newsom]

I think it just means when you age and your bones start turning to butter and your muscles start turning into beef jerky.

[Nicole]

And then. And what was the other word you said?

[Tawny Newsom]

Hypertrophy.

[Nicole]

Who's that?

[Tawny Newsom]

She. She means when you lift so that your muscles get bigger.

[Nicole]

That's what I'm trying to do. I'm trying to get a fatter ass.

[Tawny Newsom]

Hell, yeah. You need progressive overload. See, I'm insufferable right now.

[Nicole]

But, yeah, you're saying all the things that Ben says that I'm just like, what are you saying?

[Tawny Newsom]

Give me Ben's number.

[Nicole]

I will. He's very nice.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just to hang.

[Nicole]

He would love it.

[Tawny Newsom]

Hey, yeah, No, I don't need a coach. I don't need your services. I just kind of want to chop it up. About the gains.

[Nicole]

About gains.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And. Are you going to like a regular gym?

[Tawny Newsom]

Thank you so much for asking. This was. It's like I engineered this. It's like I was like, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to go on there and I'm going to make them talk about lifting weights. No. So I bought a bunch of dumbbells for my house. And then I was like, oh, should I also join a gym? But I've also been going bouldering. So a couple of times I've used the gym at the bouldering place because you can, like, use the machines and stuff, and then you can do a little climb up a rock. But I've been bouncing around gyms to try and be like, do I also want a gym? Because at a certain point, you know, you just get too strong. Hate to brag. So I can't have enough dumbbells at my house. They don't. I would just be. It would be littered in dumbbells. So I need a gym at some point.

[Nicole]

Kettlebells.

[Tawny Newsom]

I have a couple of those because I. What do I have?

[Nicole]

I have some little weights, and then I have 15, 20, 25, 35, 50.

[Tawny Newsom]

Hell, yeah.

[Nicole]

And then I just. They're in a little basket.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh.

[Nicole]

Of home goods.

[Sasheer Zamata]

A kettlebell that. Home goods sells kettlebells.

[Nicole]

Oh, sorry.

[Tawny Newsom]

The basket is.

[Nicole]

You were like, what? I was like, whoa, wait a minute. Stopped you dead. Ass in your tracks.

[Tawny Newsom]

And it's like Halloween colored and says, like, home is where the boo wins or something.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It makes are falling off of it. I've seen a kettlebell where it's a big weight and then you like move like a little like dial and then a smaller weight can come out or smaller. It's like a Russian doll of kettlebells.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

And they have dumbbells like that too. But I'd already bought my dumbbells. So then I was like, I don't know if I need those. And I have a little. What's this one?

[Tawny Newsom]

You have a bench, like a bench press.

[Nicole]

You have a bar, but a little one. And it's pink.

[Tawny Newsom]

Why is it little?

[Nicole]

Because I didn't want the six foot one, so I got a four foot one.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, oh, oh. Short. Little. Not like. I don't know why I pictured like very thin.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And I'm like just a pencil.

[Tawny Newsom]

It's just a long pencil.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Me and Clyde are doing it. We're like, dogs should lift weights.

[Tawny Newsom]

Frankly.

[Nicole]

He should. Honestly. He should also get a job.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

And tribute to the household tax. The rich.

[Tawny Newsom]

That includes dogs.

[Nicole]

Yes. It's wild. He lives rent free in my house. I pick up his shit.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yes.

[Nicole]

I feed him and then he's like, play with me.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh my gosh. I speak too much.

[Nicole]

Speak on really is a lot of.

[Tawny Newsom]

What is he bringing to the table?

[Nicole]

Bad breath. But then I figured out that was my fault.

[Tawny Newsom]

This is taking a turn.

[Nicole]

It was the treats I was giving him. They were making the breath a little hot. So now he eats probiotics.

[Tawny Newsom]

They gotta be like in a treat form or something, right?

[Nicole]

Yeah, they're shaped like a bone.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Tawny Newsom]

He's not just eating straight up probiotics.

[Nicole]

No. And I don't even know what a probiotic is.

[Tawny Newsom]

Helps your gut health.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay. I knew you would know.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

Wait, what's a Boulder gym? Bouldering.

[Tawny Newsom]

So bouldering. Look, I just started climbing, you guys. No stolen valor here. I'm not going to act like I'm some elite level climber, but bouldering is just where you can just with your hands climb up like 15ft and there's like a crash pad down below as opposed to being in a harness with ropes. So you're not going up that high. Okay.

[Nicole]

And you feel safe without the harness and the in the belaying and the ropes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Because it's only like 12, 15ft and I'm like almost 6ft. So it's not very far to fall. Do the math.

[Nicole]

No, it really hurt. Oh, okay. Thank you. That was nice.

[Tawny Newsom]

So, yeah, I'm only one of me really up in the air. And so if I'm like, I can't hold on and like, you let go, you just fall another of me. And that's not that far. So it doesn't bother me. Have you ever done it? Would you ever do it? No.

[Nicole]

The next thing I was going to say was, you going to take me?

[Tawny Newsom]

You want to go?

[Nicole]

I think so.

[Tawny Newsom]

Is this like the time you texted me, hey, I like being outside and I might want to go on a little hike now? And then when I asked you about it in person, you said, hey, I don't know what got into me that day. I was like, whoa, whoa, who's having.

[Nicole]

Such a nice day?

[Tawny Newsom]

And you go, I'll go on a hike for less than a half hour. I'm like, bitch, you texted me. I didn't ask, I didn't do this. I didn't open this door.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Like, stop bothering me about this.

[Tawny Newsom]

I think she put a hand in my face.

[Nicole]

I said, ma', am, I really do think I did. I was like, okay.

[Tawny Newsom]

I said, you, you. You yelled at me in my phone.

[Nicole]

What happened was I was having such a lovely day outside and I was like, wow, my friend Tawny loves hiking. Maybe she'll take me on a hike. So then I texted and then you asked and then it became too real. I had one follow up. You hiked for hours and you're out there and you have like a walking stick, and that's scary.

[Tawny Newsom]

Sticks are really good for your knees. The trekking poles, they help your knees and your balance. They're good. Anyone who's not like 19 years old and or a mountain goat should be using trekking poles.

[Nicole]

I'm certainly not a mountain goat. How do I. Where do I get a pole from?

[Tawny Newsom]

REI store or Amazon.

[Nicole]

What's rei?

[Tawny Newsom]

How are we doing? Like the most insufferable who's on first street? You can get them online. Just order a trekking pole. You can get the cheapest one. You can carry one, you can carry two. It's good. It disperses your weight so that as you're moving, it's not just all on your two feet. You become like a four legged animal. And so it's good on your knees, your joints.

[Nicole]

How steep are these inclines?

[Tawny Newsom]

It depends. The earth is varied. It's varied.

[Nicole]

Boy, oh boy, I'm nervous. I'm gonna go though.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Are you?

[Tawny Newsom]

You were mad when I brought it.

[Nicole]

Up and I kind of got mad again.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, I.

[Sasheer Zamata]

There's other ways to be outside.

[Nicole]

Yes. Maybe I'll Go to. Maybe we could go to a park.

[Sasheer Zamata]

All of us. That sounds nice.

[Tawny Newsom]

I like a park.

[Nicole]

Yeah, that's pretty fun. And I can be outside, but I do want to go bouldering.

[Tawny Newsom]

Why that now?

[Nicole]

I don't know. That seems okay. I think I. Yeah. Going up. I don't know. It sounds like pole.

[Tawny Newsom]

That's true. You have a lot of strength from pole, so I bet you'd be great at it.

[Nicole]

But I might be bad at it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Don't know until you try.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Literally, no one cares there. Oh, yeah. I like the vibe of a bouldering gym. Cause it's. First of all, it feels very like. It feels like the weirdos. It's a bunch of queer people. A lot of people alone. Like, a lot of women just with, like, a huge set of headphones, just kind of like on their phone or like, reading a book in between, like, while they rest. And then they just go scurry up a thing, and then they drop down. Then they sit there and read. I was like, I like this energy.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Have you made any friends there?

[Tawny Newsom]

No, I would. I would not. I would not talk to a person. No, no, I want to be.

[Nicole]

That's very funny.

[Tawny Newsom]

No, I want to go with my boyfriend or alone. I don't want to talk to anybody. Do you talk to people in a fitness environment?

[Nicole]

Uh, in pole classes?

[Sasheer Zamata]

A little.

[Tawny Newsom]

Really?

[Nicole]

Just a little. I never made, like, friend friends, but, like, I have acquaintances from pole.

[Tawny Newsom]

How do you start a conversation in an exercise scenario?

[Nicole]

Usually it is. So, like, at the end of a pole class, we'll do like, a free dance or something. Or like, when you're working on something as a class that, like, a couple people got it and most of us don't got it, you kind of just like, encourage each other, and then, like, maybe that develops into, like, a little bit more of a conversation. But usually it sticks to, like, oh, you almost got your. I don't know the names of any of the things. Your thingy, your hip hold or whatever.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And then you.

[Nicole]

Maybe you talk a little bit more. But, yeah, it doesn't really devolve past pole.

[Tawny Newsom]

I just realized I asked a question that made me maybe sound like a serial killer. That's like, how do you just be nice in public? And you described something very basic, like, encourage people. Talk about the thing you're doing.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Well, workout class does seem intimidating because you're like, we're all here for the class. You could just go in, work out, go home. It's not actually a conducive environment for Conversation. So you do kind of have to make a move.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah. I also feel like there's a lot of conversation already happening in my brain between myself and my body dysmorphia that I have to, like, that takes up most of my time. Like, she and I are in a conversation.

[Nicole]

Oh.

[Tawny Newsom]

So it takes a lot to then come outside of that and then be like, how are you today? To another human.

[Nicole]

Wait, what is your body dysmorphia? Is this too personal to ask what your body dysmorphia is telling you?

[Tawny Newsom]

Doesn't every woman over 35 have body dysmorphia?

[Nicole]

Mine's the opposite, though. I think I'm smaller than I am in my whole life. I've always thought that. And then sometimes when I squeeze through things, I'm like, that's so wild that I had to squeeze. Why didn't I breeze through this small opening? And then sometimes I'll pass a mirror and be like, oh, bigger than I thought. Oh, my God. So, yeah, in my head, I'm like. I'm like. I'm so small. I'm like Thumbelina. In my head, I like this.

[Tawny Newsom]

I like that side of it.

[Nicole]

Well, it's tough because when you, like, walk past a mirror or something, you're like, huh, Right? It's not what I think. I. It's strange.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah. I guess I just think, like, everyone over 35, unless they had, like, I don't know, a therapist for a mother. We all lived through the 2000s where, like, Nicole Richie was the fat one on the Simple Life, remember, like, the 2000s were crazy. Remember that picture of Jessica Simpson that went around where everyone was like, she.

[Nicole]

Was a size four?

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, my God.

[Nicole]

Which is really wild.

[Tawny Newsom]

How do any of us live and like ourselves after going through that?

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's pretty rough.

[Nicole]

Yeah. You have mind body dysmorphia.

[Tawny Newsom]

We need to trade. We need to just timeshare the dysmorphia so we have balance. Is that possible?

[Nicole]

Mm, probably.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Nicole]

I don't know. Technology's gotten pretty far. Go to a scientist person, they could, I don't know, lift a piece of our bra.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hey, it's okay.

[Tawny Newsom]

Hey, hey.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No, you were getting there.

[Tawny Newsom]

No, no, no.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hey, Nicole, we saw the vision.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, we were with you. You're among friends.

[Nicole]

Thanks, guys.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You're welcome.

[Tawny Newsom]

Do you want to have a little more of that? Yeah. Okay. That's good. It's real good. Why don't we all take a sip?

[Podcast Ad Voice]

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[Nicole]

Yeah, take me to your rock gym. I'll do that. Would you do that?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I would do it.

[Tawny Newsom]

Hell yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

Sashir said she'd come back to poll with me, and I burst into tears. And then the next week hurt my arm.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. I was like, I'm still waiting for an invite.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

I'm ready.

[Nicole]

Well, I think I have two more weeks, and I think I'm okay.

[Sasheer Zamata]

All right.

[Nicole]

Because I could do that again.

[Tawny Newsom]

Did you have to go to physical therapy?

[Nicole]

No, I don't do that.

[Tawny Newsom]

As, like, a matter of principle.

[Nicole]

I don't really believe in.

[Tawny Newsom]

Exists.

[Nicole]

Yeah, I know it exists. I just don't think it'd be helpful for me. I think I could just figure it out on my own.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay, look, guys, I've been hyper fixating on gym shit for a year. It. I am resisting the worst parts of my personality right now to not do it. Yell at you about that? No way. That's not what friends do.

[Nicole]

Well, I'll tell you, I rehabilitated my ankle pretty well on my own. My trainer was like, you actually have, like, pretty good flexibility with it with what you've been doing.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, cool.

[Nicole]

Because every day I do a dumb little stretch with it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Did you make up the stretch or did someone show it to you? I looked online.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay, so you're using. You're doing your own research to, like, do physical therapy type things with your body. Okay.

[Nicole]

And my trainer is a physical therapist, so he does some. We do some stretches together that he's like. And then you do them. You do them on your own. And I go, yes. Okay. And then my pole teacher has given me some exercises. And then with my elbow, I've just gone online and looked up things.

[Tawny Newsom]

That counts. You're doing it. I thought you were just like, vibes.

[Nicole]

Just ride dogging it, babe. Just. Just gonna wait. See how it feels now. I work on it and I try to make sure that I can do things. And then I was like, I gave myself two weeks. I was like, if two weeks. If it doesn't get better.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

And it still, like, really, really hurts, then I'll go see a doctor or something.

[Tawny Newsom]

See, this is good. This is an informed approach.

[Nicole]

Hey, thank you.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, you're welcome. I like it. I'm sorry I give you shit for it.

[Nicole]

It's okay. Everyone gives me shit. It's okay.

[Tawny Newsom]

We talked about that. About how people think you don't know what you're talking about. Yes. But then you've, like, done research and you're like, I do. I do actually know.

[Nicole]

Only sometimes I would say 65% of the time, I do actually know what I'm talking about. And then 35% of the time, I don't know.

[Tawny Newsom]

That's not a bad ratio, honestly. Hey, thanks. Because I feel like there's people out there just going, 0, 100.

[Nicole]

Oh, yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

But acting the opposite. Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

A lot of people who think they know what they're talking about and have done zero research.

[Nicole]

And a lot of them have podcasts.

[Tawny Newsom]

I was gonna say this.

[Nicole]

It gets amplified. At least when I say things on the podcast that I'm like this. I go, actually, I don't know. You gotta look it up on your own. Yeah. I don't know.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Or we look it up.

[Nicole]

Oh, yes. We sometimes have Ally look up stuff.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, what could we have Alli look up right now?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Ooh, let's see.

[Tawny Newsom]

What's something we've all been wondering?

[Nicole]

What is something I've been wondering? That's funny. I'm usually filled with questions and queries.

[Tawny Newsom]

I guess we know everything we need to know.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I guess we know everything.

[Tawny Newsom]

Wild. Oh, nice. We've reached the end.

[Nicole]

We've reached the end.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Maybe look up fun group outdoor activities that aren't hiking.

[Nicole]

Oh, okay. I would like to see that, team.

[Research Assistant]

I'm. I'm going to it.

[Tawny Newsom]

Thank you.

[Research Assistant]

Also, I figured out how to Google search and get rid of AI. Yes. You have to scroll. If you're on Google, you have to scroll all the way down to the right and there's a web.

[Nicole]

Oh, yes, yes, yes.

[Research Assistant]

Change the game. Okay, so I'm looking @ Teen Vogue 65 Things to Do with friends outside. That's not hiking. Create a mini nature zine.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Create a zine.

[Nicole]

Wake up magazine.

[Tawny Newsom]

We have to go into publishing. I just wanted to sit in a.

[Nicole]

Park dog, say, oh, you want to go outside?

[Tawny Newsom]

Be our competitor.

[Nicole]

Also part of that feels like has.

[Sasheer Zamata]

To be inside and to print things.

[Nicole]

Yeah, that's funny. What's number two?

[Research Assistant]

Visit a public sculpture garden.

[Tawny Newsom]

That's closer. Closer.

[Research Assistant]

Three is go geocaching.

[Tawny Newsom]

All right. Too much already.

[Nicole]

What's geocaching?

[Tawny Newsom]

That.

[Nicole]

I.

[Tawny Newsom]

That used to be a thing where you'd find, like, little treasures that people had left. But using a gps. Is that still the same thing?

[Research Assistant]

Yeah, yeah. You download an app and you find hidden treasure in your area, and it's like a real life scavenger hunt.

[Nicole]

What? That. What?

[Tawny Newsom]

No, we can't go looking for treasure in Los Angeles. It will be syringes.

[Nicole]

We can't.

[Tawny Newsom]

We can't do that.

[Nicole]

Teen Vogue.

[Tawny Newsom]

What are you doing?

[Research Assistant]

Go fruit picking.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That sounds nice.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, I like that.

[Research Assistant]

Explore a local cemetery. Respectfully.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No.

[Nicole]

Respectfully. I like that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Respectfully. Was there.

[Nicole]

Don't disrespect these. If I ever got a text that was like, do you want to go to the cemetery? I'd be like, nah, dude, no. No, thank you.

[Tawny Newsom]

I also don't think I've paired the word explore with respectfully. I've never explored something disrespectfully.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I actually have done a scavenger hunt in a cemetery that really?

[Tawny Newsom]

So you have explored disrespectfully.

[Nicole]

That is pretty disrespectful. I hope they thought it was respectful. It was like.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It was like Valentine's theme. So there was, like, little, like, things you had to find, like a gravestone of, like, a couple or like, this person was born in this year and this person died in this year. Find the pair or whatever.

[Nicole]

And like.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, you're just, like, walking around, seeing. Seeing who was there.

[Nicole]

I won't even go to the movies at that cemetery because I think it's disrespectful.

[Tawny Newsom]

Me either. I don't like. Well, I also just don't want to watch a movie alongside a bunch of dead people.

[Nicole]

Yeah, there's something about it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You're always alongside a bunch of dead people.

[Tawny Newsom]

Well, this feels like I've gone to their place of worship.

[Nicole]

I went to their home.

[Tawny Newsom]

I went to their house. If they come in my house, I'm like, whatever. You know what we're chill. It's fine. Right now we're watching Dune 2 guys. But for me to go to their house and then be like, we're watching Fast and Furious 9. I'm just like, oh, loud.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's so funny.

[Nicole]

We're watching Fast and Furious 9.

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't know what they watch at that thing. I've never gone to it.

[Nicole]

I've never gone either. The watch things like Back to the Future, which feels too, like, happy for the dead.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, but then do you watch something that's, like, about dead people and things?

[Nicole]

I don't know. I don't.

[Tawny Newsom]

Why did.

[Nicole]

Why did it start?

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't know. It's just a big space.

[Nicole]

Why did someone say, we're gonna watch movies on. Are people sitting on gravestones? Is that like.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No, no.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, God, no.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's just like an open patch of grass.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh. How do we know there's natural.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Gravestones are pretty far from where the movie happens.

[Tawny Newsom]

How do we know there's not graves under that grass?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, I guess we don't.

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't like it.

[Nicole]

I don't like it either. It creeps me out.

[Tawny Newsom]

And when I get invited to it, I tell people why. I don't just say, oh, no, I'm busy. I go. I don't go to that. I don't think it's right.

[Nicole]

I don't think it's right. I think that's very funny to give an answer like, not, I'm busy. Not, no, thank you.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You shouldn't go either.

[Nicole]

Hey, I'm judging you. I don't do this.

[Tawny Newsom]

I'm not judging you, but I'm just saying what I'm comfortable with my spirit doing. I always give an answer. I don't like to do a Just like, oh, so sorry, I can't make it. I feel like I tend to give a too honest answer because I want people to know where I stand on things.

[Nicole]

Yes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And they will ask again. They'll be like, I got it.

[Tawny Newsom]

That's true.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Loud and clear.

[Tawny Newsom]

And if I like. So I want to be like, oh, I would like to do that. I just have to, you know, go to the dentist this week or whatever.

[Nicole]

But I just have to go to.

[Sasheer Zamata]

The dentist this week.

[Tawny Newsom]

Like, I can't do it because I have to go to the dentist as opposed to, I. I'm not going because I don't believe in it. I think it's important to have a distinction.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I think so.

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't know. Do you guys gloss over when you. Or do you Tell too much of the truth.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I would like more information from you sometimes, because sometimes you'll be like, I'm not available. I'm like, I'm not the press.

[Nicole]

Like, let me. What are you doing?

[Sasheer Zamata]

She's not available for comment.

[Nicole]

Well, she will not be there.

[Sasheer Zamata]

She will not be arriving.

[Nicole]

What are you doing?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Just say what you're. Sorry, I can't go. I'm going to dinner. I can't be there. I'm out of town. I'm not available. All right.

[Tawny Newsom]

I'd also like to know when sasheer checks your avails.

[Nicole]

I didn't realize I was doing that. I thought I was saying what I.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Was doing sometimes, but sometimes, like, no, I'm not available, or I have a heart out. What are you doing? Tell me. I'm your friend.

[Nicole]

Oh, good Lord. I'm so sorry. I. I simply didn't realize I was doing that.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, sometimes you'll say, like, I have to be in Pittsburgh, and it takes everything in me to not be like, what are you doing? What are you. Where are you going? What are you doing in there?

[Nicole]

Usually it's a show.

[Tawny Newsom]

What are you doing over there?

[Nicole]

You know, just doing the he he, ha, ha's.

[Tawny Newsom]

I would, like. I think, are you like, me where. I want too much information. I want details. I want what you're wearing. I want what you're nervous about. I want the flights you're nervous about. Yeah, like, oh, I'm going to Pittsburgh. Not sure what kind of cuisine they got there.

[Nicole]

I don't know. I just don't know what I'm gonna be eating when I land.

[Tawny Newsom]

I want too much. I want too much info from my friends.

[Nicole]

I chronically tell people not enough information all the time.

[Tawny Newsom]

Mm.

[Nicole]

I'm not.

[Tawny Newsom]

I.

[Nicole]

There's something in me where I just. I don't know how to.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

I got the. Too much. I'd be telling people too much. I'm like, I won't go to the cemetery because I think that it's. I think it's against God or something. And then, so I feel like we need to also timeshare that quality.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Maybe you think that, like, you have it in your head and you think it's already come out.

[Nicole]

Maybe. Yeah, maybe. I think when I say a thing, I'm like, oh, you can fill in the blanks.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's enough info.

[Nicole]

That's enough info. You got it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

But I guess it would be helpful to just let people know things I don't know.

[Tawny Newsom]

Do you share location? Yes, I share that with One of our other friends, my friend Steph, who I've known since we were 12, and she's one of the only people I share location with. And I think it also helps her because she'll just be like, I see that you're in Morocco. I have a quick question.

[Nicole]

She decided to go to Morocco.

[Tawny Newsom]

It's a baseline, as opposed to her always having to start with like, where are you now? What's going on? That's helpful.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, I think it cuts down on questions. My mom also has my location, and she can feel when I'm traveling, like, she could just, like, sense, like, are you on a plane right now? Or, like, are you going somewhere?

[Podcast Ad Voice]

Where are you going?

[Sasheer Zamata]

And I'm like, I am, actually. Whoa. And this is before I shared my location. And then she was like, can you just give me your location? And then I did. And she's like, oh, I see you're on your way to Mexico. Have fun.

[Tawny Newsom]

Like, great moms love to feel like they're in the CIA a little bit. They love to just already know a thing.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But, yeah, it cuts down, like, where are you?

[Nicole]

What are you doing?

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, who are you with? Why are you going there? Worker pleasure.

[Nicole]

Worker pleasure is always so strange. I don't like, you know, when you, like, leave the country and they're like, are you here on business or pleasure? And I'm like, yeah, pleasure. Like, pleasure just seems insane.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, pleasure.

[Tawny Newsom]

Questions like that. That seem archaic and insane. Cause I'm sure they served some purpose back in the day when it was like, we just need to know if we need to install a fax machine in your room. I feel like now no one needs to know that info at a Hyat. My phone does everything. You don't need to know what. What I'm here for. I'm here to see the circus or I'm here to build a museum. It's none of your business. I like that.

[Nicole]

Those are the two options. Build a circus or go to the museum. Wait, what did you say? Go to the museum or go to the circus.

[Tawny Newsom]

Go to the circus. Classic pleasure.

[Nicole]

Classic pleasure.

[Tawny Newsom]

What do you guys do for fun?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I definitely see circuses for pleasure.

[Nicole]

Have you ever seen the Universe Soul Circus?

[Tawny Newsom]

No. Wait, is this black people? Is this black?

[Nicole]

Shen Yun doesn't start on time.

[Tawny Newsom]

Well, we didn't even need to ask that.

[Nicole]

But it was fun and it was long.

[Tawny Newsom]

Is it Ariel like silks? And is it, like, black Shen Yun?

[Nicole]

I saw it when I was a kid.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I saw it when I was a kid.

[Nicole]

The Only thing I remember was the ringleader, ringmaster. He had a lot of energy.

[Tawny Newsom]

You got to.

[Nicole]

And I just remember being like, whoa. Does he sleep through the night?

[Tawny Newsom]

Like stares at a while.

[Nicole]

I always think about that. Like people who have like, like, like Kevin Hart. I'm like, does he like reboot at night? Like, does he shut off or does he have to like sit and like decompress for hours before he can go to bed? He has so much energy.

[Tawny Newsom]

No, I mean, I. I did a show with him a few years ago and he sleeps like four hours a night. And he like records this podcast on the lunch break while we're filming. And in the morning he's working out, in the evening he's doing other business shit. Like, he just never stops.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's always business for him.

[Nicole]

So always business for him. Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Never pleasure. He's never at the circus.

[Nicole]

Never at that circus. Tawny, I have a question about friendship. Do you remember your absolute first best friend?

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, maybe. Oh, gosh, maybe my first best friend was named Griselle in elementary school. I don't remember her last name. I think it was in first grade or maybe kindergarten. And I just remember she was like so pretty. She was in like a pink dress. And I just remember we would giggle all the time and like run around at recess. And I remember she had very nice like gold jewelry on. And I remember as a child, I was like, wow, we're allowed to wear like pretty jewelry, like grown ups. It's almost like she felt like a grown up. Her mom had her outfits laid.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, that's fun. That is impressive. I feel like I wouldn't trust a child to take care of jewelry.

[Tawny Newsom]

It probably wasn't real jewelry, you know, in my mind I probably. It was probably just like something sparkly. And I thought it was very, very fancy jewels.

[Nicole]

Thought it was Van Clef Cleef.

[Tawny Newsom]

Who that?

[Nicole]

Do you know? You don't?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I don't.

[Nicole]

Van Cleef Clef, Heathcliff. It's clovers. It's like necklaces with weird clovers. And for some reason it's so expensive.

[Tawny Newsom]

Is it pure gold?

[Nicole]

I don't know. But it doesn't seem like there's any diamonds or anything in there.

[Tawny Newsom]

Is it just for Irish Americans to wear?

[Nicole]

I think everyone can wear it.

[Tawny Newsom]

Are you sure they're allowed?

[Nicole]

I think it's for everybody.

[Tawny Newsom]

Interesting.

[Nicole]

Yeah, I think as long as you got the cash, you could do it. Lisa Shir, do you remember your absolute first best friend? I don't think we've ever talked about that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I don't think we talk about that either. Yeah, I do. Lauren White. And we met in first grade at a Christian school and we were called the Chatterboxes because we would chat so much and I was a military brat. So we moved after second grade and we tried to be pen pals and, like, stay in touch, which we did a pretty good job of for years. And just like, you know, hand wrote letters to each other. I don't even know of what. Like, I have no idea what updates an elementary school kid would have.

[Nicole]

You learned another letter. Another letter. We made it to M. Each grade you get to another letter.

[Tawny Newsom]

I'm just impressed. Your friendship had, like, a little branding, like a little name. The Chatterboxes.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But they said it as, like, a bad thing. Like, you guys were the Chatterboxes. We were like, yeah, we are.

[Tawny Newsom]

Even better. Oh, you guys had a hook. You had a vibe.

[Nicole]

Bad girl.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah. Walking across the playground, everyone's like, look at that. Look at them.

[Nicole]

He's a chatterbox.

[Tawny Newsom]

Hunty little chatterbox.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No one can stop us chatting. Do you remember yours?

[Nicole]

Yes. There was Daniel Prospero. She had an above ground pool and she really liked horses. And then there was Stephanie Hoffman, who had an in ground pool.

[Tawny Newsom]

Whoa.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You're like, where are the people who have pools?

[Nicole]

Who has a pool? Yeah, I feel like those are my very, very, very first ones. And then Stephanie went somewhere. Did she move? No, she went to a different school. And then I think that, like, kind of killed our friendship.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, I'll do it. No more access to the pool. Yeah.

[Nicole]

Had to go to the above ground pool.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, my gosh.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, boy.

[Nicole]

But also, I had other things in common with them. I just remember that distinctly because I didn't have a pool growing up because my mother was punishing me.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Me.

[Tawny Newsom]

That's why you didn't have a pool?

[Nicole]

She was.

[Sasheer Zamata]

So you could get a pool, but you're not gonna get one.

[Tawny Newsom]

She's like, actually, when we bought this house, there was one there. I filled it in with cement.

[Nicole]

Well, she said to me once, she said, do you want a pool? And I said, more than anything. And then she said, maybe we'll think about getting a pool. And I was so excited for like, a couple of days. And then she goes, we're not getting a pool. And I said, why? And she said, the rules would be you can't swim alone, But I know you. You'd bring your stuffed animals outside and go, I'm not alone. And I said, you got me there. Because she was Absolutely. Right.

[Tawny Newsom]

I mean, for her, for. First of all, that's. She knew her daughter well.

[Nicole]

She told me there was nothing I could do that was original.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, my God.

[Nicole]

That she would. She would always know what I was up to. I was, how you say, a little difficult when I would, like, do things. And I think when I would do things, she'd be like, I'm not surprised. So I would stop trying to do things.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh. She was like, this isn't novel. Yeah.

[Nicole]

This isn't original.

[Tawny Newsom]

I've thought of everything. I have eyes everywhere. My dad was the same way. He was very like, I see everything. I know your every move. I've thought thoughts before you even knew they could be thoughts.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yep.

[Tawny Newsom]

So don't try it.

[Nicole]

Yep. That was. That was my mother. And I'd be like, I'm still gonna try it.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

I'm gonna do it.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah. Did you ever outsmart her even once?

[Nicole]

No.

[Tawny Newsom]

Damn.

[Nicole]

No. Not at all.

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[Sasheer Zamata]

Is one time we went to a.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

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[Sasheer Zamata]

So I have a picture of her.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

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[Sasheer Zamata]

So I feel like Aura frames is.

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[Nicole]

Tawny Me. Do you have a favorite memory of an experience that solidified your friendship with someone?

[Tawny Newsom]

Whoa, that was a lot of nouns. Memory.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You?

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, me.

[Nicole]

You got a favorite memory of an experience that solidified your friendship with someone?

[Tawny Newsom]

Someone. Yeah, I sure do. Let me think on it.

[Nicole]

I didn't read the end of it into a best friendship.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, shit. Okay, well, hey, that narrows it down. That narrows it down.

[Nicole]

Let's see.

[Tawny Newsom]

Solidified it into a best friendship. I mean, okay, so my. One of my best friends, Bethany Thomas, who you guys have met. We have been close for like 15, 16 years or something like that. We met in Chicago and we met doing a play. And she was like this very well known. She still is this incredible theater artist. She makes a living doing theater. Which I'm like.

[Nicole]

Which is really fucking hard.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yes. Like, so hats off to her. She's got the biggest voice in the country. She's incredible. And so we met. Cause we were cast to play opposite each other in this play called the Life by Sy Coleman, which was a 70s musical about sex workers who were just trying to make it off the streets. And so we were set to play best friends. And she also was like the epitome of very, like, indie Chicago. Cool. She was in a couple of bands. She like, did. She just did all kinds of weird, cool artsy shit. And everyone knew Bethany. And I was kind of newly out of college and like, not many people knew me yet. And so I went up to her at a house party and it was like everything you picture of, like early aughts house party is just like solo cups and MGMT blasting in the background and everybody's vibes. And I go up to her and I'm like, hey, I'm Tawny Newsom. We're cast together in a play. And she was like, oh, okay, cool. Yeah. So like, you're an actor. What else do you do? And I go, oh, well, like you, I'm also in a band and like a movie. She just goes, ugh, who doesn't have a band these days? And turned away. And I was like, you're so cool. I am nothing.

[Nicole]

I am nothing.

[Tawny Newsom]

And we became very good friends. And anytime I've told her that story, she's like, like, I said that. And everyone else around her is like, that sounds like you.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes. Did it take warming up or like, was your next interaction much better than that one?

[Tawny Newsom]

I feel like. So the thing about Bethany is that isn't even like a bad interaction. Like, she says shit like that and means no harm or like, Disrespect. She's just like, fuck, everybody's in a fucking band. It's 2010, everybody thinks they're blonde, redhead right now. Anyway, do you want to go to the bar with me? Like, so it was already very familiar and warm and I feel like once we started rehearsals, she was also very. I love Bethany because the second you prove to her you're not an idiot or you're talented, if she has to work with you, she's like, okay, I like you. So you know, we got into rehearsals and we started singing and she was like, great. You're not terrible buddies.

[Nicole]

That's a fun way to walk through life. Everyone's terrible until they're not. Everyone's guilty until proven innocent.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Let me not.

[Tawny Newsom]

I mean she will hear this and let me not label her exactly like that. But she just has a very strong sense of like, self. And her talent enters a room almost before she does. Because everybody in that community knows her and like, loves her. And so I feel like there's a very like, okay, come, come to my level. As people fucking should.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, definitely.

[Nicole]

So she is wonderful. And I will say the very first time I met her I was like, wait, have I met her before? But I hadn't. She is very familiar and she like makes you feel at home with her. Yeah. Because she is very self assured.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

And that's always a fun person to meet.

[Tawny Newsom]

Especially when she meets like. Because you like her. Like you're fellow pros but in completely different fields. And so I think she's also very good at like, she's non competitive but like, you know, she just like, she likes a fellow pro. I feel like too often as women sometimes we're like, I don't know, just forced to kind of pretend that other people have worked as hard as us and have as much talent as we do and we just kind of have to be like, yeah, no, we're peers.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Uh huh, sure.

[Tawny Newsom]

So it's nice when you don't have to do that.

[Nicole]

Wait, you sing? I know this. Yeah, but you also play the drums.

[Tawny Newsom]

You know that from doing drugs at my house.

[Nicole]

Did the singing come first or the drumming come first?

[Tawny Newsom]

I guess the singing came first. Cause I started it when I was like a kid trying to do like music, theater y shit. And then I quickly realized I was not like a Bethany Thomas type and didn't have a great musical theater voice. So I joined a bunch of bands, did a bunch of rock music and then being in those bands, I was like, I wanna learn to play all this stuff a little bit. So I kinda, like, learned to play guitar. I suck. Learned to play bass. I suck a little less. Learned to play drums. I was like, I'm mediocre. So that's the one that kind of sucked. Yeah.

[Nicole]

And I will say it's okay to be mediocre at stuff.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's fun.

[Nicole]

I like being mediocre at several things. Like, I'm not a great sewer, but I know I can take out my sewing machine and make, like, a couple of things. Okay.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Ish. You know, you made actual clothing items.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

I would say that's pretty good.

[Nicole]

Hey, thank you. The inside's a mess.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I mean, no one has to see that.

[Nicole]

You are right. Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

You also, you described to me how to make a clothing item that I found really impressive. Because I was like, oh, you can make that? And you were like, yeah. You just.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, but I will.

[Nicole]

It is mediocrity at its finest. It's hobbies.

[Sasheer Zamata]

We're just.

[Tawny Newsom]

Why do we live in this grindset fucking culture where I'm not yelling at you, I'm yelling at the world where everybody has to be like, top of their fucking game and it has to be content and we have to be like the best? On TikTok, doing the thing. Back in the day, people just used to do needlepoint.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I know.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Motherfuckers was just putting flowers on a pillow for fun. Just for stress relief. The number of things I do to just keep my phone out of my hand, I'm. We increase those. Be bad at them. Who cares? I color every day.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Oh, nice.

[Tawny Newsom]

I do.

[Nicole]

Wait a minute. I might want to get into that.

[Tawny Newsom]

I love it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

We can do that outside.

[Tawny Newsom]

Ah, we could color outside. I bought a coloring book on Amazon. Cause I like the patterns that are really, really teeny. Because it's like more satisfying to fill in really teeny ones. And I like a glidey gel pen. Cause it glides really nicely. And I bought one on Amazon. I think it's literally called Women's Anxiety Coloring Book.

[Nicole]

You know what I said?

[Tawny Newsom]

Rude.

[Nicole]

Love that. Because they were like, someone will be writing that in the search, and I'm gonna send them right to me.

[Tawny Newsom]

Anxiety coloring Book. Specifically gendered for women.

[Nicole]

I love it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I wonder what the men's looks like.

[Nicole]

Is this like trucks?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, trucks, trucks, trains, Transformers.

[Tawny Newsom]

Deodorant.

[Nicole]

Boy FERC deodorant.

[Tawny Newsom]

Hammers and nails.

[Nicole]

Body spray.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Wait, now I want a boy anxiety. Me too.

[Nicole]

I want dragons.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Big drug, Paul Thomas Anderson.

[Tawny Newsom]

It's just all. It's just All Getty Images of pta.

[Nicole]

Pta.

[Tawny Newsom]

Thomas Anderson. We just had this conversation over text.

[Nicole]

And I also had that conversation last night. I don't know why I cannot. It's because it stands for Parent Teacher association. And I don't understand why all of my friends are saying it. Because none of them have children.

[Tawny Newsom]

It also stands for physical therapy appointment.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Huh.

[Nicole]

I do. I do. I do want to see that movie, though. The PTA man. Everyone's got to stop. Everyone's got to stop. Just say the man's name.

[Tawny Newsom]

Well, we could also say the name of the movie. You called it. Leo is in a war all the time.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's really funny.

[Nicole]

Well, it's like, everybody. Every day's a fight. Everybody. What's the. How do you. What's the name of it? Was it one battle after the other?

[Tawny Newsom]

Actor. Another.

[Nicole]

Not far off.

[Sasheer Zamata]

He was in a fight every day.

[Nicole]

I also want to see him. That's a much easier movie for me to say.

[Tawny Newsom]

Him. Yeah, that is a lot easier. I don't know.

[Nicole]

Have you seen it?

[Tawny Newsom]

No.

[Nicole]

I want to see.

[Tawny Newsom]

Is it scary?

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's what I'm concerned about. It looks really bloody.

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't do scaries. Same.

[Nicole]

Oh, you don't do scary, but you did Sinners.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's black people.

[Nicole]

Several times.

[Tawny Newsom]

I'll do black people.

[Nicole]

Him is black people.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Tawny Newsom]

Then I'll see it.

[Nicole]

Him is Jordan Peele produced.

[Tawny Newsom]

See, I needed more context.

[Nicole]

And then Marlon Wayne's in.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay.

[Nicole]

And then other people.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay, got it. I rescind my statement of not seeing it.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Tawny Newsom]

I want to.

[Nicole]

Now we'll figure it out.

[Tawny Newsom]

Great.

[Nicole]

Do you have a core memory that comes to mind when you talk about friendship?

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't know. Why? Your questions scare me.

[Sasheer Zamata]

They're like a task.

[Nicole]

That's the way I say it.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

There's no segue. I just look down and then say something.

[Tawny Newsom]

It's just that your. Your energy shifts so hard that suddenly I feel like I've applied for a loan and I'm not getting it. Like, I guess I got.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Also, the clipboard doesn't help. It's like, so.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

Uhhuh.

[Tawny Newsom]

Like you're reading.

[Nicole]

See?

[Sasheer Zamata]

You have friends.

[Tawny Newsom]

Allegedly, yes.

[Nicole]

You have friends. How many?

[Tawny Newsom]

Two of them are right here, I think.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Interesting.

[Nicole]

Interesting that you think.

[Tawny Newsom]

A core memory. That.

[Sasheer Zamata]

What?

[Tawny Newsom]

That makes me think of friendship.

[Nicole]

Do you have a core memory that comes to mind when talking about friendship and what that means to you? Your energy shifted.

[Tawny Newsom]

I know, because I think it feels weighty. It feels like if I say the wrong thing. I'll disappoint someone.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No, there's no wrong.

[Tawny Newsom]

What's that about? I don't know. A core memory that makes me think about friendship. I mean I love. Cause I don't have siblings. I feel like my whole life I've been like trying to gather people with sibling energy to me. Cause I love friends, but I specifically really value those types of friends where it's like we could be in a weird little family and we don't even have to talk all the time, but I can call you crying if I need to. And so I think I have that with weird people. Through doing stuff with Star Trek. Cause Star Trek is such a intense family community. It's not just like you're in a cast of a show. It's like you end up in so many weird scenarios and like conventions and stuff and just out late with wild ass people that it feels like you build, yeah, you build these like familial bonds really quickly. So I probably have that with my castmate Jack Quaid who's a very like, he's like my brother. It truly feels like, oh, I finally found like a little sibling. And the core memory I would name is us going to a, going to a club in Chicago during one of our first conventions. Cause I was like I'm kind of from here and you haven't ever visited here and I need to take you around and like show you Chicago. And so I took him to like four different bars and clubs and it was all my like favorite haunts. And I just remember this was like, I think maybe the first season of the Boys was out. He was not the large star that he is now, but he's still a very handsome, affable man. And women in Chicago, drunk women in Chicago were throwing themselves at him so thirstily and he was like not engaging, did not know how to handle the attention. And I just remember becoming like his bodyguard and having to like defend him from like wasted 50 year old white women from Displaynes. And I was just like wrenching him out of bars and finally I was like, Jack, you have to understand you're like a Chicago 15 so just get used to it. And he was like, I don't want to get used to it. Can we go somewhere more?

[Nicole]

No.

[Tawny Newsom]

So it's weird. My core memory is about my friend getting harassed all night. I'm sorry about that. But it did really bond us because I realized that like that protective energy I felt, I was like, oh this, I feel this because he feels like a Little brother.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's sweet.

[Nicole]

That is sweet.

[Tawny Newsom]

I think it's kind of a sweet story about harassment, right?

[Sasheer Zamata]

About protection.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, you're right.

[Nicole]

So sheer. Protects me. We were once in a bar and this man was in my personal space and I, for whatever reason, didn't know how to be like. Like, get away from me. So I just kept, like, shrinking and shrinking and shrinking. And then I was like, help. And so she was like, hey, get away from her. You want a knuckle sandwich?

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, you turned into an old timey, like, little playground boy.

[Nicole]

Put it there.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yes, you did. Did you do a Y I auto Y?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I oughta. Yeah, I just turned my little paperboy hat. Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Did you wind up like this before you punched?

[Nicole]

And he's like, this is too weird. I'm just going to go, yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

He was like, in your neck. Like his, like, whole head was right here. And I was like, what are you doing?

[Tawny Newsom]

I was like, oh, God, I do wait. But Nicole, are you not good at telling a weirdo to fuck off in a bar? You seem like you would be.

[Nicole]

I am sometimes.

[Tawny Newsom]

Just not in that moment.

[Nicole]

In that moment. I don't know why I was like, I can't.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, it.

[Nicole]

My fight.

[Sasheer Zamata]

What is it?

[Nicole]

Fight, flight, Fight freeze. Yeah, it varies.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

Greatly. My, like, fight instinct is very. The threshold's low.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

Like very small things can happen. And I'm like, I'll kill you. And then like, someone will wrap their whole body around me that I don't know. And I'll be like, well, can't move.

[Tawny Newsom]

Well, I clearly deserve this in some way.

[Sasheer Zamata]

They must really need this.

[Nicole]

They need a hug.

[Tawny Newsom]

They need a hug with their calves.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

I don't lock my car door and someone opened my door and took some stuff and then I wanted my tote bag back and I was like, maybe they'll come back. So I wrote a note and I was like, hey, can I my tote bag back? Here's $20. I don't know what that response is.

[Tawny Newsom]

Is that.

[Nicole]

That's not fight, flight or freeze.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

What is that?

[Nicole]

What is that response?

[Sasheer Zamata]

There's also fawn, but I don't know if that sounded umbrella.

[Nicole]

It's an anomaly. Am I proving my mother wrong every day? Oh, my. Unpredictable.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, your mom didn't see that coming. Did they bring it back?

[Nicole]

What? My mom tote bag. Oh.

[Tawny Newsom]

Also it. Imagine me calling your mom it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And they.

[Nicole]

I don't know, maybe.

[Tawny Newsom]

Did they find a way to bring it back?

[Nicole]

I don't know. I was like, no, she's still dead.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay, well, science is progressing every day.

[Nicole]

I thought maybe her life. I don't know. I don't know why I thought that. No, they never brought my tote bag back. Oh, but there's still $20 in my car in case someone else opens the door and needs it.

[Tawny Newsom]

Well, now they're just gonna take that and then you're gonna write a note that says, please bring my $20 back.

[Nicole]

Here's a tote bag. They can have the $20. I want them to leave my basketball and my stripper shoes alone because they took my stripper shoes. My pleasers.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, and those can be hard to fit.

[Nicole]

I will say they were broken. The heel was coming off. So they didn't get very good things.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, maybe they were on a scavenger.

[Nicole]

Hunt and they were like broken pleasers. Oh, it's on the map.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Whoa.

[Nicole]

Yes.

[Tawny Newsom]

I went to a punk show last night and my boyfriend Brandon, like, we were in the pit. Guys, I was in a mosh pit for the first time in like 15 years. It was very fun. Scary.

[Nicole]

Isn't that like people punching?

[Tawny Newsom]

Nobody punched. This was an age appropriate pit.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

Nice.

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't think I'd go to a pit for a show where everyone's like 19. You can't go get in a mosh pit where most of the attendees at the concert are still on their parents insurance. You need to go where everybody cares about their knees and their joints.

[Nicole]

So everyone's are butter now. You gotta go in with a mosh pit. It's just a churn. Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

People are concerned about bone density in this pit. We saw the band pup and it was like, Everybody was like, 30, 35 plus. I was like, great. But he turned to me and he was like, somebody stole my wallet and my earbuds. And I was like, no, this was such good vibes.

[Nicole]

That sucked.

[Tawny Newsom]

But he found his earbuds on the floor, smashed a shit. And then he found his wallet. It lost him.

[Nicole]

It fell. Oh, my God. Oh, that's nice.

[Tawny Newsom]

So he had just left his bag open. Oh. Which is annoying. But it was like, I was like, oh, I like the vibes of this place. You lost your wallet in a mosh pit and somebody turned it in.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Thank goodness. That is community.

[Nicole]

That is, yes. Community fellowship. I once lost my wallet and then I was like, oh, I think I left it in my car. And then I was like, oh, no, my car is open. So then I had to go back to my car. Wasn't in my car. But then I just looked further in my purse, and it was just in a pocket that I didn't look in.

[Tawny Newsom]

The number of times I'm like, I've been robbed and the perpetrator was other purse.

[Nicole]

Yeah. That happens a lot.

[Tawny Newsom]

She gotta go to jail. Yeah.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Other purse has stolen a lot of things.

[Nicole]

Other purse has stolen so much.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I saw mosh pit at my chemical Romance, and it was, like, mostly women, and it was like, I was like, that's so cool. Like, I. You know, I don't know how many other opportunities there are for, like, women to feel, like, comfortable and safe in a. In a pit situation. And. And then they were, like, doing, like, little, like, dances together and, like, lowering themselves to the ground and then, like, raising up at the same time. And I was like, they're having so much fun.

[Tawny Newsom]

That's nice.

[Nicole]

I love that.

[Tawny Newsom]

I did feel a need being of protective energy. I as a woman of size. And, like, now, because I've been in the gym, I feel very strong.

[Nicole]

A woman of size is really funny because it reminds me of Southwest's passenger of size policy. Oh, is that what they call it? Yes.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

No.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yes.

[Nicole]

Passenger of size.

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't like passenger of size.

[Nicole]

A woman of size.

[Tawny Newsom]

Well, gosh, Southwest, you gotta get different terms.

[Nicole]

Well, they have abolished it, and they're now making the fatties pay for two seats. Can you believe they used to be heroes and now they switch to the villain. Oh, that's good. That's better.

[Tawny Newsom]

It was really good.

[Nicole]

It was quick.

[Sasheer Zamata]

This is rhymes.

[Tawny Newsom]

I was trying in the pit. I was trying to protect the girlies. There were lots of little girlies in there just going crazy. But then, like, it would start to close in. There was all these big dudes, so I was, like, trying to use my body. They didn't ask for this help, but I felt like I want to try and, like, help these ladies. Not fall down.

[Nicole]

A tiny lady dancing, and you look up, and a woman of size is.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Protecting you with a force field.

[Tawny Newsom]

And I just shout. I've been working out. Don't worry. This is replacing my leg day.

[Nicole]

My bones are so strong, they'll never be butter.

[Tawny Newsom]

Just the most insufferable person. I think as we all march towards menopause, I'm just gonna find ways to be more and more insufferable. As long as it promotes health.

[Nicole]

I love that I will say live music when I go. I usually dance for the whole time. I'm so sore the next day. It really is a workout.

[Tawny Newsom]

So this same week, I also went to LCD sound system oh, and we danced so hard. I got like 25,000 steps that day. Wow. I was like, this was the best. Yeah, it was such a fun show.

[Nicole]

I remember I got like. Cause they say you're supposed to get 10,000 steps. And one of my highest days, it was like 15,000 steps. But I'd been at the airport and the auto show and I've talked about this before, so that's what I got to do every goddamn day.

[Tawny Newsom]

You gotta go get on the plane.

[Nicole]

Go to the airport, go to the auto show.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, unfortunately.

[Nicole]

That's crazy.

[Tawny Newsom]

Unfortunately, current guidelines suggest everyday airport you.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Have to take a flight for health.

[Nicole]

But I was like, I walked so much that day and I was like, how do you do that in real life?

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, well, do you know about the movement snack?

[Nicole]

Excuse me? What the fuck are you talking about?

[Tawny Newsom]

Once again, everyone, I'm sorry. I'm not sorry. The movement snacks. This part of my personality sucks so bad.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I just want.

[Tawny Newsom]

No, but I want everyone listening who's like ready to throw their phone into the seat. I want you to know you're right, but I'm not gonna change. So the movement snacks. So they've done a bunch of studies where in addition to so not like to replace the 10,000 steps, but they're saying like, another way to get similar benefits from movement is to break up your day with like, like little short bursts of movement. They can be as little as like two minutes long. So you can just like stand up and do 10 squats, or you can do like a few lunges, or you can like do little like chair push ups. And if you do that like six to ten times during the day, it can give you as many of the health benefits. Again, do your research. I'm not a scientist, but it can give you a lot of benefits. Like walking can.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I was really hoping that movement snacks was gonna be. You place different snacks around the house and you go get them.

[Nicole]

You said I would like something to negate working out.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No, it's working. You're moving to get it. But what kind of snacks I guess of your choosing?

[Nicole]

I guess you could hide apples somewhere.

[Tawny Newsom]

Would you accept like a carrot dangled in front of you? Like a horse? Like a cartoon horse walking through my treadmill.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nicole]

Okay, I gotta get it.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I feel like I'm closer, but I'm not.

[Nicole]

Maybe I'll hide my persimmons around the house.

[Tawny Newsom]

Persimmons?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Well, that's a dangerous game.

[Nicole]

Cause what if you forget and then.

[Tawny Newsom]

You'Re like.

[Nicole]

My neighbor? Has Japanese persimmons that I've been stealing. Oh, leaning over the fence.

[Tawny Newsom]

Why didn't you ask her for some? Hey, you know what? Look, everybody's different. Some people watch movies in the cemetery, some people steal persimmons. I'm not here to judge.

[Nicole]

The thought never occurred to me.

[Tawny Newsom]

What?

[Nicole]

Am I supposed to knock on their door and be like, can I have your persimmons?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

Oh, that's crazy. Why have you just been taking them like fucking Oliver Twist? Because the thought of knocking on their door being like, can I have your fruit? Is great. That's wild.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But then you might make.

[Nicole]

It's truly so wild.

[Tawny Newsom]

Wait, but no, isn't it normal to.

[Nicole]

Be like, hey, you have a fruit tree?

[Tawny Newsom]

Do you have something to exchange?

[Nicole]

No, I have nothing. My harvests are one tomato at a time. A cherry tomato. Do you want me to go over there with three little cherry tomatoes and say, can I have your big fruit?

[Tawny Newsom]

You could offer tickets to a show.

[Nicole]

What if they don't like me?

[Tawny Newsom]

Look, I haven't thought this through, all right? I just. I would love to live in a world where you could knock on a neighbor's door and ask, hey, can I? Cause most of the time, I think what I'm thinking is most people have a fruit tree, they have more fruit than they can handle, so they're usually trying to give that shit away. Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I wish someone would ask for my olives. No one ever wants my olives.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

Really?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yeah. So let's role play this, okay?

[Tawny Newsom]

You're a woman. You've got fruit or olives and you want them and you don't know each other.

[Nicole]

Ding dong. Oh, hello. Hi, I'm Stacy.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Hi, Stacy. I'm Natalie.

[Nicole]

Hello, Natalie. Can I get your food? I live next door and I saw that you have olives.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I do have olives.

[Nicole]

Can I have them?

[Sasheer Zamata]

You absolutely can have my olives. I have way too many. I don't know what to do with them. Please take them.

[Nicole]

So how does this go? Will you go make a bag or something, or do I go in your backyard?

[Sasheer Zamata]

Um, I guess I personally don't want to deal with it, so you're welcome to go pick them if you want.

[Nicole]

And can I come in anytime I want to your backyard?

[Sasheer Zamata]

I would like to know when you're coming.

[Nicole]

See, I feel insane.

[Tawny Newsom]

Well, you took it to a place.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I did.

[Nicole]

I can I come anytime?

[Sasheer Zamata]

First you wanted me to do work. Are you going to bag them? Then you wanted to trespass on my property when I'm not here.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah. She's not the store, first of all. But it started really good.

[Nicole]

It did start really good. Well, should I. Well, I don't know. Do I wait here? You go. Bag them or, like, do I. Are you gonna let me in? I don't. It seems so.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You are leaning over the fence. So it seems like it's in the front of the house, right?

[Nicole]

It's on the side of the house.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay. I guess you just have to go in the gate.

[Nicole]

I don't know.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Okay.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay.

[Nicole]

And I don't know how to get to their front door. I don't know if their gate opens.

[Sasheer Zamata]

You can't even get to the front door from the street.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

You can.

[Nicole]

There's a gate, but I don't know if it's, like, locked.

[Tawny Newsom]

Just keep stealing them.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Maybe. Is there. Maybe there's a doorbell by the gate.

[Nicole]

Oh, maybe. I didn't even think of that. You said, keep stealing, and that's.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I heard that.

[Tawny Newsom]

Just keep stealing them. I realize this has caused too much.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It got complicated.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah. I thought this was gonna be easy, and normally not. It wasn't.

[Sasheer Zamata]

No.

[Tawny Newsom]

Just steal them. And if she calls you out on it, just be like, what do you want me to do? Burst in your house?

[Sasheer Zamata]

What do you do for me?

[Nicole]

Rob your house? Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

Make you do work? Burst in your house. I don't know where the doorbell is. I don't know.

[Nicole]

I don't know how to get in here.

[Tawny Newsom]

Just get combative.

[Nicole]

Yeah, I'll hit her.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

Throw the persimmons at her. But have you had a Japanese persimmon?

[Tawny Newsom]

I have.

[Nicole]

They're nice.

[Tawny Newsom]

They're really good.

[Nicole]

They're so sweet.

[Tawny Newsom]

My friend Andrew says that they are the perfect dessert. But he says that when people are like, what should we have for dessert? Is there cake? Is there? And he goes, you know, it's a perfect dessert. Just one ripe persimmon.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I'm sure they love that.

[Tawny Newsom]

Everybody hates it.

[Nicole]

Everybody hates it. I also don't know if mine are ripe. Ripe.

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, right. Cause you're just snatching them.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Yes.

[Nicole]

Are they hard?

[Tawny Newsom]

It's persimmon season right now. So chances that they're ripe, Are they hard? They shouldn't be too hard. No.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I think also if they come off the tree easily, that means they're ready.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

I'd be pulling some. I should show you the picture because a lot of them still have tons of leaves.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Is it branch in your hand?

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

And I'm like, are they good when you bite into them?

[Nicole]

They're very sweet. And I really like them.

[Sasheer Zamata]

It's probably good.

[Nicole]

They're fine, but they are. It's like a. Like a. Maybe a harder apple.

[Tawny Newsom]

One thing I know about fruit, and it's not much fruit tells you when it's not ready for you. Fruit's gonna let your mouth know.

[Nicole]

Fruit's gonna let you know. I don't even know why you are right.

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't know why I said it like that.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I like that.

[Nicole]

Fruit's gonna let you know.

[Tawny Newsom]

Cause you bit into a fruit and the fruit's like, not ready.

[Nicole]

Or it'll be like, you waited too long. And that happened with the watermelon I grew three or four years ago. Yeah, I was. I was. I thought size mattered, and it doesn't. With watermelons, you gotta swap it. Well, I watched a video, and that's not even it. When a watermelon is growing on the vine, there's like, little. It looks like a pig's tail. It's a little curly spiral.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, yeah.

[Nicole]

The curlicues next to. On either side of it. When they're brown, it's ready.

[Tawny Newsom]

Okay.

[Nicole]

And I followed that with mine, and I didn't wait for it to get huge. And it was misshapen, and I posted it. People were like, that's a squash. And I was like, wait till they see it cut open. And I opened it, and it was this, like, lovely shade of, like, reddish pink. And then it was so fucking sweet. And. Yeah, you gotta wait for the little pigs to get brown. Them little piggies to get brown.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, wait for them little piggies to get brown. That's when you know your watermelon's ready.

[Nicole]

You know what they say, Watermelon's ready.

[Tawny Newsom]

When the piggies get brown. I think. Okay, I think I saw your watermelon on your stories or on your Instagram, maybe. Do you guys have this thing where when your friends have a podcast, you like, we have to talk more about the social parasocial relationship where you know your friends in real life, but if you listen to them too much, then you know things they didn't tell you.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Tawny Newsom]

So, like, I can't listen to this show. I can't ever. Because then I. Because when we go to lunch or something, we want to be like, hey, how's your week been?

[Nicole]

Blah, blah.

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't want to be like, I saw you got a pizza stone. I don't want to just launch in.

[Nicole]

With info that was, I saw you got a pizza stone.

[Sasheer Zamata]

But even if you did, we just give you more information.

[Tawny Newsom]

About it, I guess, but it feels strange now.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I do get that.

[Tawny Newsom]

Do you run into this with other people who have shows?

[Nicole]

I don't listen to other people. I don't listen to podcasts at all, so I don't have that issue. But I did have that issue with my sister where we would be. I would, like, go see her. We'd be in the car, and we'd be talking, and she would say something that I definitely didn't tell her, and I'd be like, wait, what? And it took a couple of visits before I was like, oh, are you, like, listening to my podcast? And she was like, yes. And I was like, ah, don't.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, that's what I say to people. I'm like, gross. Don't do that.

[Podcast Ad Voice]

Yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

I also have the issue with family, and I have to be like, you do have to check in on me. Like, you do. You also have to ask me questions.

[Nicole]

I was like, call me. I'd rather you call me.

[Tawny Newsom]

As in, yeah. Because she.

[Nicole]

She was like, I like hearing your voice. And I was like, yes, but you have the. You have the main line.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can get a live podcast direct to your.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And you can even ask personal questions.

[Nicole]

Like, it's an interactive podcast, cater to you.

[Tawny Newsom]

When I send people voice notes that get a little too long, I do call them personal pan podcasts.

[Nicole]

I like them.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Like, I love a voice podcast that's.

[Tawny Newsom]

Fun because you can listen to it while you're doing stuff. And you're like, oh, that's my friend telling me. Got something.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Well, I think we're nearing the end. Okay. Do you want to tell people where to find you, what you want them to see?

[Tawny Newsom]

I'll be. I'll be roaming the streets, I'm sure this fall.

[Nicole]

This fall. Coming to the streets.

[Tawny Newsom]

T she been in these streets, y' all get there. Time for you to meet me there. You can't. I. I've just been writing a lot. I've been working so much for Star Trek. What do I have to tell you all? Starfleet Academy, the show I was writing for, comes out in the beginning of 2026.

[Nicole]

Nice.

[Tawny Newsom]

Fun.

[Nicole]

Do you have any conventions coming up?

[Tawny Newsom]

Oh, my gosh. I have the Star Trek cruise coming up.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Ooh, yes.

[Nicole]

Yes.

[Tawny Newsom]

It's a cruise full of freaks. And I love it so much.

[Nicole]

I love it so much.

[Tawny Newsom]

In February.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Tawny Newsom]

Yeah. You can buy tickets to that. Oh, and I started doing. God, I'm just like, all track. I started taking my friend Andrew, who I've done podcasts with for years. I started taking him like sampler platter of Star Trek episodes. So we're just kind of cherry picking from different series. So right now we're going through all the pilots and that you can subscribe to on Suboptimal Pods. That's my little subscription site.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Nice. Yeah.

[Nicole]

Hell yeah, dude.

[Tawny Newsom]

Hell yeah.

[Nicole]

Well, Tawny, thank you for taking the time out. Thank you to come on over. Come on over, baby.

[Tawny Newsom]

I appreciate it. And I appreciate that you both dressed alike but didn't share it with me so that I could match you.

[Nicole]

It's very funny.

[Tawny Newsom]

I don't feel ganged up on or left out at all.

[Nicole]

When I walked in, you were like, oh, you guys dressed up the same. And then I responded, well, she dressed like me. And then everyone was like, wow.

[Tawny Newsom]

I said, hey, you didn't have to start with that energy. We were having a nice time.

[Sasheer Zamata]

And I was like, oh, okay.

[Tawny Newsom]

Wow. We were having a nice time.

[Nicole]

I'm always in a striped shirt. I should have just been nice.

[Tawny Newsom]

It's okay. It's nice.

[Nicole]

Now here, I'll say this. This. You did get the memo. Look at them socks.

[Tawny Newsom]

Boom. Oh, yeah.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Striped socks. There we go.

[Tawny Newsom]

Boom.

[Nicole]

Okay, goodbye.

[Tawny Newsom]

That was a Headgum podcast.

[Lamorne Morris]

What's going on? It's Lamorne Morris and Hannah Simone and we host the Mess Around a New Girl Rewatch podcast now on Headgum. Now here's the thing. Every single week, we chat about an episode of New Girl and we really get into it. Like, we get up in there. We get up in there. You know, we reminisce about our times on set. We share behind the scenes tea. We react to rewatching episodes that we haven't seen in years. We talk about how Jake Johnson is dog.

[Sasheer Zamata]

That's not true. We talk about so many memories we have of working with the biggest stars on the planet. I'm talking Princess Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo.

[Lamorne Morris]

We're just two BFFs having a good old time. Okay? Sometimes we even talk to other co stars like Zooey Deschanel, Jake Johnson, Max Greenfield, and Damon Waynes Jr. And your dad. We talked to your dad on this show as well.

[Sasheer Zamata]

Make sure you subscribe to the Mess around wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes drop every single Tuesday.