Sasheer Saw a Woodpecker in Real Life

Summary

Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata

Episode: Sasheer Saw a Woodpecker in Real Life
Date: October 1, 2025

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Overview

In this lively and laugh-filled episode, Nicole and Sasheer meander through everyday dilemmas, delightful anecdotes, and friendship philosophies. From sleep struggles and the pitfalls of AI, to home improvement mishaps, unexpected wildlife sightings, geography debates, and classic advice for listeners, the pair offers a candid look at their day-to-day bestie banter. The episode’s core, as usual, revolves around their easy, hilarious chemistry and ability to turn the mundane into the memorable.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Struggles of Falling Asleep

Timestamps: 00:16–01:44

• Both Nicole and Sasheer commiserate over their inability to fall asleep easily, often getting distracted by phones, movies, cleaning, or journaling.
• Nicole tries to journal when she can’t sleep, but admits, "These are just things I've done. This doesn't mean I go to sleep immediately." (00:34, Nicole)
• Sasheer observes that Nicole transitions from awake to asleep seamlessly during trips, but Nicole says she only struggles in her own bed.

Memorable moment:
Sasheer: "You're Katy Perry. Wide awake." (01:37)

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2. Celebrity Space Missions & Grocery Store Analogies

Timestamps: 01:44–04:15

• The duo riff on the oddities of celebrities like Katy Perry and Gayle King going to space and wonder about the real scientists who have to accompany them.
• Sasheer likens solo missions to a grocery store trip, saying, "If I have a mission, if I'm going to the grocery store, I'm not picking up friends to come with me." (03:23)

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3. Cooking Fails & TikTok Recipe Workarounds

Timestamps: 04:15–06:32

• Nicole and Sasheer reminisce about their failed attempts to cook a pasta dish by watching recipe videos repeatedly without ever reading the caption.
• Sasheer shares how she now screenshots recipes when captions are missing, causing mild chaos for her partner John.

Notable quote:
Nicole: "You're just watching the video play, and you're like, basil mozzarella. And I was, like, furiously trying to type it as you're reading it, instead of pausing..." (04:03)

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4. Skepticism About AI

Timestamps: 05:03–06:32

• Both hosts express skepticism about the proliferation of AI, especially AI-branded products ("AI glasses") and intrusive tech.
• Sasheer: "I don't trust anything named Gronk. That's the name of a smart thing. Gronk." (05:19)
• Nicole is especially baffled: "What about these are AI because it's like artificial intelligence. Like, it has to be doing something on its own. These are glasses. What are you talking about?" (06:06)

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5. Movie Night: Lucky Number Slevin Review

Timestamps: 06:56–08:46, 27:03–28:13

• Sasheer watched Lucky Number Slevin for the first time, was amused by the 2000s' aesthetic, and recommends it as a "fun movie" once you get through initial confusion.
• The cast list and Josh Hartnett’s hair receive special shoutouts.
• Nicole and Sasheer lament the current state of movie streaming ("Why do I have to get this thing to watch the thing?" – Nicole, 26:55) and pine for the days of Blockbuster.

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6. Wildlife Encounters & Misconceptions

Timestamps: 09:31–11:55

• Nicole excitedly shares her real-life sighting of a woodpecker in her yard, initially describing it as wearing a "red hat," which Sasheer finds dubious until presented with video evidence.
• Sasheer learns what a woodpecker actually looks like, admitting, "That's not what I thought a woodpecker would look like." (11:09)

Highlight:
Nicole: "It had, like, a red hat. No, not a hat. No, it was like I saw a real bird." (09:42)

• Sasheer also has animal stories—her local raccoon takes baths in the pool.

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7. Neighborhood Antics & Trash Finds

Timestamps: 11:59–16:38

• Nicole describes her neighbor who mows the lawn with scissors and sometimes asks for ginger ale or milk for her dog, which seems to be the cause of its upset stomach.
• They both joyfully recount the joys and pitfalls of scavenging trash furniture, with stories spanning from New York to LA and college days.
• Discussion of outdoor furniture’s limitations (it never actually lasts outside).

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8. Dollhouse Decor and Creative Play

Timestamps: 17:02–19:57

• Sasheer has fond memories of wallpapering her trash-found dollhouse with miniature supplies from Michaels.
• Nicole recalls her Barbies were essentially "unhoused," living wherever in her own house.

Memorable exchange:
Sasheer: "I can't believe your, like, dolls didn't have a home. You had homeless dolls, unhoused dolls, if you will." (19:49)

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9. The Geography Segment: “Where Is This State?”

Timestamps: 28:23–33:36

• The duo attempt to recall US geography, struggle to place Utah, Colorado, Wyoming, and discuss which states are considered "the South" or "the Midwest."
• Hilarity ensues as they bicker over questionable maps and things feel off-scale, especially Wyoming’s prominence.

Notable quote:
Nicole: "Like, I feel like someone's having an agenda. Yeah." (31:56)

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10. US Territories and Uncontacted Tribes

Timestamps: 34:07–39:39

• Thanks to their producer Ali, the hosts learn about US territories, including American Samoa and the Northern Mariana Islands.
• Nicole brings up North Sentinel Island and the fascinating, hostile-to-outsiders Sentinelese people.
• Sasheer is captivated by the idea of an uncontacted, mysterious people and jokes about wishing to be that mysterious herself.

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11. Dreaming of Island Retirement

Timestamps: 39:41–46:01

• Both hosts muse about retiring to an island—Guam and Okinawa are considered, with Ali providing detailed travel logistics.
• Nicole imagines herself on Okinawa, coming full circle as her ancestral home.
• Sasheer dreams about befriending the Sentinelese tribe in her old age, “Maybe they'll be like, turtle. And I'll be like, whoa, you know the word turtle?" (45:36)

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12. Listener Questions & Advice Corner

Timestamps: 46:53–61:56

12.1 Traveling with Friends

• A listener seeks tips for traveling across Europe with a best friend.
• The duo advise having conversations about expectations, daily routines, sleep habits, and meal plans.
• Nicole: “Do you need a white noise machine to go sleep?” (48:51)

12.2 Dealing with an Interrupting Friend/Roommate

• Another listener asks how to handle a roommate who constantly interrupts.
• Both share their own struggles and stress the importance of honest but loving communication.
• Sasheer’s therapist's advice: “Hey, girl, I was talking here.” (52:39)
• Nicole explains, “It could be as like, like as understanding as possible...I love hearing you talk, but it's a little hard for me to like get my opinions in a conversation." (56:09)

Notable anecdote:
Nicole once had to tell Sasheer to stop wiggling her fingers in her face, and it worked after repeated reminders.

12.3 The Peanut Butter & Jelly Knife Debate

• Sasheer ignites a debate: do you use one knife, two knives, or even a spoon? Ali says knife and spoon; most others use a knife.

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13. Sleep Positions: Deep Thoughts

Timestamps: 60:48–61:49

• Nicole cannot sleep on her stomach or back due to back pain; prefers her side.
• Sasheer sleeps on her side or tummy for deep sleep, on her back when napping lightly.

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Notable Quotes

• Sasheer: "I don't trust anything named Gronk. That's the name of a smart thing. Gronk." (05:19)
• Nicole: "You're just watching the video play, and you're like, basil mozzarella. And I was, like, furiously trying to type it..." (04:03)
• Sasheer: "That's not what I thought a woodpecker would look like." (11:09)
• Nicole: "I can't believe your, like, dolls didn't have a home. You had homeless dolls, unhoused dolls, if you will." (19:49)
• Sasheer: "Maybe they'll be like, turtle. And I'll be like, whoa, you know the word turtle?" (45:36)
• Nicole: “Do you need a white noise machine to go sleep?” (48:51)
• Sasheer (therapist advice): “Hey, girl, I was talking here.” (52:39)

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Tone & Style

• Lighthearted, playful, and confessional. Nicole and Sasheer exchange quick banter, self-deprecating humor, and supportive affirmations, often laughing at their lack of knowledge or the everyday absurdities they encounter. The episode is filled with warmth and relatable friendship energy.

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Timestamps of Key Segments

• 00:16 — Sleep difficulties & bedtime distractions
• 01:44 — Katy Perry space mission/grocery store metaphors
• 04:15 — Cooking & TikTok recipe troubles
• 05:03 — AI skepticism & product confusion
• 06:56 — Movie night: Lucky Number Slevin
• 09:31 — Nicole’s woodpecker story
• 11:59 — Neighborhood animal antics
• 14:08 — Trash furniture finds
• 17:02 — Decorated dollhouses & Barbie homelessness
• 28:23 — Geography segment: Where’s Utah? What’s the South?
• 34:07 — US territories & uncontacted tribe discussion
• 39:41 — Dreaming of island retirement
• 46:53 — Listener questions (traveling with friends, interrupting roommate)
• 60:48 — PB&J knife debate and sleep position discussion

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Final Thoughts

This episode perfectly encapsulates the off-the-cuff magic that makes Best Friends so inviting: two comedians, reveling in playful nonsense, supporting each other through real annoyances and big questions alike, and reminding listeners that best friendship is equal parts heartfelt conversation and unstoppable laughter.

Transcript

[Nicole]

This is a Headgum podcast.

[Sasheer]

Hi, Nicole. Hi, Sasheer.

[Nicole]

How are you?

[Sasheer]

I'm good. I was just lamenting about how my body is dumb. No.

[Nicole]

So dumb.

[Sasheer]

Well, it's frustrating.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Because I will be exhausted and the minute my head hits the pillow, it goes, should we look at our phone or watch a movie or maybe clean up a little bit?

[Nicole]

Yeah, I have that issue too. I also like my go to is the phone. But sometimes there are times where if I do turn off the lights and I am fully laying down, I'm trying to go to sleep and it's not happening, then I'll journal. Try. That doesn't always help. These are just things I've done. This doesn't mean I go to sleep immediately. Journal. Or start cleaning and be like. Also saw a video that was like, if you can't go to sleep, go do something.

[Sasheer]

Like, be productive.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

I've never seen you struggle with sleep. I have only seen you be awake and then sleeping. Watching movies, sharing hotel rooms. Never once have I seen you, like, toss and turn and struggle. I feel like you snuggle down and then you're honk shoing.

[Nicole]

I think it's in my own damn bed. That is a problem. Like if I'm watching tv. Yes. But that. Then I'm on the couch or on your couch and I'm not in my bed.

[Sasheer]

No.

[Nicole]

Then I had to transfer myself to my bed and then I'm wide awake.

[Sasheer]

You're Katy Perry. Wide awake. Katy Perry's having a tough time on tour.

[Nicole]

I wish we did see her.

[Sasheer]

It's not nice to say she's having a tough time on tour than laugh, but she almost fell out of the damn sky on that, like, horse thing.

[Nicole]

Apparently she got electrocuted.

[Sasheer]

She got electrocute. Her whole ass husband left her. It's not funny. It's not great, but it is wild. Yeah, that's like. That's some karma energy that, like, I hope I never put out into the world that it comes back to be like that.

[Nicole]

I mean, do you think, like, her equilibrium got a little knocked off when she went to space and things just never really settled back to where it was supposed to be?

[Sasheer]

Maybe I haven't heard much from Gail. Who else went to space? Maybe everyone's having trouble.

[Nicole]

Maybe. I hope not.

[Sasheer]

Who else went to space?

[Nicole]

Oh, some really impressive people. But I can't share some really impressive people.

[Sasheer]

No.

[Nicole]

There's one woman who like, like, was trained be an astronaut as, like, a scientist who was, like, supposed to go to space and like, this Was the trip that she went on.

[Sasheer]

That's fud up. You went to astronaut school for however many years, and you're a trained astronaut, and they said you can't go to space, but what you can do is orbit around with Katy Perry. I would shoot myself in the face. That is terrible. That's what you get.

[Nicole]

I think, like, I guess, you know, when they were arranging this trip, they were like, we do need some science people, some space science people, not just, like, celebrities. And yeah, like, people were like, wait, everyone's talking about Gail and Katy Perry, but there's actually some really cool people on this thing.

[Sasheer]

But here's my thing. Why did Gayle and Katy Perry go. If I have a mission, if I'm going to the grocery store, I'm not picking up friends to come with me.

[Nicole]

Wait, why not? I'll go to the grocery store with.

[Sasheer]

You because it's out of the way. It's out of the way to have them come.

[Nicole]

But if I'm, like, around the corner, you're not gonna take me to the grocery store?

[Sasheer]

No, I'm on a mission. I have to get the things on the list.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer]

No, we don't do good at the grocery store.

[Nicole]

No, we get lost.

[Sasheer]

And remember when we tried to make that thing and it was like, some.

[Nicole]

Pasta dish or something?

[Sasheer]

Yeah. And we watched the video over and over and over again, and Matteo was like, why don't you just read the caption?

[Nicole]

Yeah. You're just watching the video play, and you're like, basil mozzarella. And I was, like, furiously trying to type it as you're reading it, instead of pausing it or going to the website and looking at the recipe or.

[Sasheer]

Literally looking at the caption. The caption, I have learned since that moment, the caption always has the recipe.

[Nicole]

But neither of us caught it. I was like, okay, all right, what's the next one?

[Sasheer]

And I'll tell you something. I had John make me. It was like, butternut squash, pasta, chicken stuff.

[Nicole]

I don't know.

[Sasheer]

But this one didn't have the recipe in the caption, so you better believe I screenshot each step.

[Nicole]

Yeah, that's really funny.

[Sasheer]

He was really mad at me. He was like, what? This is hard. He was like, it's against a picture, and it's just, like, kind of blurry. And I was like, you'll make it, right?

[Nicole]

But there is an app that does that. You can, like, pin things like you find on TikTok or Instagram, and then it'll write the recipe out for you.

[Sasheer]

I Forgot what's called probably fueled by AI and I'm anti.

[Nicole]

I. I think everything has AI.

[Sasheer]

I think so, too.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

But I turned off the AI on my phone and on Twitter, I blocked Gronk. Okay, that's the name of their AI. Gronk.

[Nicole]

I know.

[Sasheer]

I don't trust anything named Gronk. That's the name of a smart thing. Gronk.

[Nicole]

You sound like a caveman.

[Sasheer]

Yeah, Gronk. Tell me the truth.

[Nicole]

Yeah, but, like, they're still AI on Instagram and also Google when you search.

[Sasheer]

Stuff, why are they pushing it so hard that I have to accept it?

[Nicole]

I don't know.

[Sasheer]

I keep talking about AI.

[Nicole]

Well, it's everywhere, and it sucks. Yeah. I don't love it.

[Sasheer]

No. I want things from people.

[Nicole]

Also, I keep seeing things where. Like, ads where it's like, AI, this product. And I'm like, is it AI or is it just technology? Like, there was, like, AI glasses, and I was like, how are the glasses? What do you mean?

[Sasheer]

What you see is not what you're actually seeing, dude.

[Nicole]

Yeah. I was like, are these just transition lenses or just like. Or the ones that you. That video record? I was like, what about these are AI because it's like artificial intelligence. Like, it has to be doing something on its own. These are glasses. What are you talking about?

[Sasheer]

Isn't that wild? We're ruining communities so people can wear glasses. Yeah, People died so I can wear these. Like, that's crazy.

[Nicole]

What are we doing because of these?

[Sasheer]

What are we doing?

[Nicole]

Yeah, it's nuts.

[Sasheer]

Get me an office. I'll fix everything. Imagine an office. Yeah, give me an office.

[Nicole]

Any office.

[Sasheer]

I said in office. But an office is funnier. Just get you anywhere.

[Nicole]

That's the only thing stopping you is the fact that you don't have a space. Space to do this.

[Sasheer]

Yeah, I need a space and a desk. Sashir. And a window. And I'll get things done.

[Nicole]

Okay, well, it might be a little hard to get a window.

[Sasheer]

Oh, my God. Oh, I watched a movie last night. Lucky Number Slevin. Have you seen it?

[Nicole]

I haven't even heard of it.

[Sasheer]

Me either. But you better believe Ben Kingsley's in it.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer]

Morgan Freeman's in it. Josh Hartnett's in it.

[Nicole]

Love that.

[Sasheer]

Lucy Liu is in it.

[Nicole]

Love that.

[Sasheer]

Corey Stahl is in it. Before Ant man fame.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer]

Other people. Bruce Willis is in it.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer]

And he's got different hairs. The wig department was eating.

[Nicole]

You better say those trendy words. Eating.

[Sasheer]

They were eating on that set.

[Nicole]

Nice.

[Sasheer]

But it's A really fun movie. So for the first time, 30 to 40 minutes, you're gonna be like, what is up? And then, like, the last half hour, you're gonna be like, oh, that was up.

[Nicole]

40 minutes is a long time for me to not know what's up.

[Sasheer]

Well, I'll tell you this. The sets are fun. It's very 2000s.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer]

It's very, like, Todd Oldham or like, oh, dang. Who am I thinking of? Ellie, can you look up who designed the Parker Hotel in Palm Springs?

[Nicole]

Yes. And is this. What is this movie about? You don't know until 40 minutes in.

[Ali]

Jonathan Adler.

[Sasheer]

It's very Jonathan Adler in the early aughts. Thank you so much. It is about a man named Slevin who has a case of mistaken identity. And Lucy Liu lives across the hall, and she comes on over, and he's in a towel. And then he's in a towel for a lot of the movie, which is a real treat for all of us. And then he's in deep. Or. No, it's a case of mistaken identity, and they think he owes a bunch of money to some mobsters. But then there's this, like, backstory in the beginning that you have to watch. It'll make sense later.

[Nicole]

All right, cool. I can't wait.

[Sasheer]

And Josh Hartnett's hair is so wild and free. I love Josh Hartnett.

[Nicole]

I do, too.

[Sasheer]

I thought he was gonna have a real career resurgence, but I'm like, where have you been?

[Nicole]

Yeah. Has he done anything after Trap? Was it called Trap?

[Sasheer]

Trap? What do you mean? What's it called?

[Nicole]

I couldn't remember his Trap or Trapped. Oh, okay.

[Sasheer]

Trap. One of my movies of the year. Last year was great. I loved it. I had a blast twice. It was one of my favorite movies.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

When somebody gets snatched in a white van, I screamed. It was delightful. But, yeah, I don't know if he's been in anything since. I want him to be. Yeah, he's on the Bear.

[Nicole]

There you go. That's a successful.

[Sasheer]

That is a very successful show. Josh Hartnett's on the bear. I'm gonna watch it.

[Nicole]

Nice. Speaking of animals, I saw a woodpecker in real life.

[Sasheer]

No, you didn't.

[Nicole]

Yes, I did.

[Sasheer]

No, you didn't.

[Nicole]

In my tree.

[Sasheer]

No, you didn't.

[Nicole]

I did.

[Sasheer]

What did it look like?

[Nicole]

It had, like, a red hat. No, not a hat. No, it was like I saw a real bird.

[Sasheer]

What did it look like? It had a hat on.

[Nicole]

Well, it was like the top of its head was red.

[Sasheer]

Okay. A red feather.

[Nicole]

Red Feathers, Red hair, Red feathers, red hair. And then, like, black and white speckled feathers on the rest of the body.

[Sasheer]

And was it Peck in the wood? Yes.

[Nicole]

I have a video. I can show you. Oh, I have damn proof.

[Sasheer]

You do?

[Nicole]

Do you want to see?

[Sasheer]

Kind of, because I don't believe you.

[Nicole]

It's true.

[Sasheer]

I don't know. You said it was wearing a hat, so I immediately was like, no. I caught the raccoon on camera in my backyard the other night.

[Nicole]

Oh, my goodness.

[Sasheer]

He was a big boy.

[Nicole]

What was he doing?

[Sasheer]

Oh, just roaming around. Sometimes he takes baths in the pool.

[Nicole]

Funny. Okay.

[Sasheer]

Whoa. I don't know what I thought a woodpecker looked like, but that sure is not it.

[Nicole]

Can you hear your pecking?

[Sasheer]

Yes, I could hear it pecking.

[Nicole]

That's.

[Sasheer]

It's Peggy in the Wood.

[Nicole]

It's a woodpecker.

[Sasheer]

I'm agreeing with you now. I'm on your side now. I just.

[Nicole]

I said I. I'm just furthering the case to be like, see, it's not just a bird. It's a woodpecker.

[Sasheer]

You don't have to further the case. I'm watching it. I'm watching the proof, and I'm saying that's not what I thought a woodpecker would look like.

[Nicole]

That's also not what I thought a woodpecker would look like.

[Sasheer]

What does Woody look like?

[Nicole]

Yeah, Woody looks like. He has, like, a very thin beak. Mm. I think. Then all around.

[Sasheer]

Not fit for packing. Yeah, because that one's built.

[Nicole]

That's. This is a strong.

[Sasheer]

Yeah, that one's.

[Nicole]

You gotta be strong.

[Sasheer]

Thick neck.

[Nicole]

I'm working out. So what.

[Sasheer]

When did you see that?

[Nicole]

Yesterday. This is morning yesterday.

[Sasheer]

As a matter of fact, yesterday, I was actually.

[Nicole]

I was sitting in my yard, and there was actually a lot of activity happening. There's the woodpecker. There was a rabbit that, like, ran past. There are a bunch of bees and butterflies. Hummingbirds were just dancing in the sky. Nice.

[Sasheer]

Hummingbirds are just dancing in the sky. That's nice. I have, like, raccoons and my neighbor who cuts her grass with scissors. My neighborhood's not magical. Yesterday she stopped me on the street, and she was like, nicole, hello. I was like, hello. And she was like, how are you? And I was like, good. And she's like, I'm not good. My back is aching, and I can't walk anymore. But she was walking around, and I don't know how to be. Like, it might be painful to walk, but, like, you are walking.

[Nicole]

I feel like you said that she Would have immediately fell down. I don't know if you know you're walking.

[Sasheer]

No, help me to go.

[Nicole]

I can't be walking.

[Sasheer]

And then she. She was cleaning up the street, like she does. And then she was like. And then it's dirty all over again. And I was like, yes. And then she was like, call me if you need anything. You have my number, right? And I said, yes, but I don't think I do.

[Nicole]

What could you possibly need?

[Sasheer]

I don't know.

[Nicole]

Yeah, she needs things for sure.

[Sasheer]

Like, she needed ginger ale once because her dog had an upset stomach.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Don't make that face. I don't understand it either.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

And then she needed milk because her dog drinks milk.

[Nicole]

Oh, do you think maybe the dog's upset stomach was because it was drinking milk?

[Sasheer]

Yeah, most definitely. Yes. I think that's the cause and effect.

[Nicole]

Oh, no, it's. Poor dog.

[Sasheer]

Yeah. And then John, when he was living with me, went to go get her ginger ale once, but got her, I think, cans, and she wanted a 2 liter or vice versa.

[Nicole]

Can't be picky when you're asking for things.

[Sasheer]

Yeah. She didn't say thank you. She just said, oh, it's not the other. So, yeah, that's the magic that happens near my house. Hummingbirds in the air, woodpeckers pecking. I got fat raccoons slithering around my backyard.

[Nicole]

So sorry.

[Sasheer]

It's okay. It's kind of cute. But I do have to fix my gate.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Because that's how they're entering.

[Sasheer]

Yes.

[Nicole]

I did stumble upon. And by stumble, I just, like, was on the street. My across the street neighbor was getting rid of a wicker outdoor chair. Oh, you know I love chairs.

[Sasheer]

And I was like, snatch that right up.

[Nicole]

Did. Well, I texted him, and I was like, why are you getting rid of this chair? It's so great. And he was like, I don't need it anymore. Because I was like. Because I also wanted to be like, is it. There's something wrong with it?

[Sasheer]

Is it rotted? Are there bugs?

[Nicole]

He's like, no, it's perfectly fine. We just don't have room for it. I was like, well, I'll find room, and it's gonna be on the outside. And. But it was, like, too heavy and cumbersome for, like, just me to move it. So I asked him to help me, and we were, like, going down the front steps, and he slipped. And he, like.

[Sasheer]

He didn't fall.

[Nicole]

He did fall. And then. But, like, this old. He's older. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Oh, my God.

[Nicole]

I was like, are you okay? And he was like, yeah, yeah, I'm fine. He popped back up and I was like, okay, but like, you have to let me know if you're okay. And then we, like, finished moving it. And these are, like, looking around the house and like, like being like, are you going to fix this? Oh. He was like, trying to, like, be helpful in other ways. And I was like, are you okay? I texted him later. I was like, just checking on you. He's like, I'm fine. He, like, changed the subject and I was like, okay.

[Sasheer]

I think sometimes masculine leaning people get very, like, defensive about being hurt, where it's like, hey, just be hurt.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Like, I'll get you something if you need it. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Do you need an ice pack? Do you need Ben Gay?

[Nicole]

Yeah. Some Advil? Something?

[Sasheer]

Some tea?

[Nicole]

Yeah. He was like, no, I'm good. I was like, okay.

[Sasheer]

I really love that you're going through the garbage, stealing people's chairs.

[Nicole]

I'll never stop.

[Sasheer]

I've done it.

[Nicole]

I've done it all my life.

[Sasheer]

I've done it all my life from.

[Nicole]

New York to L. A. I'm going to always go through the trash.

[Sasheer]

You know what's wild? I had so much trash furniture in my house in New York. Never got bedbugs, which was, you know, great. But. Yeah, I just, like, couldn't stop. Wouldn't stop.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Like, even in college, all of our stuff was just from the trash.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Because people like. And also I've discarded things or, like, not thrown it away, but, like, been like, I'm done with this furniture piece, but it's still good. And like, so a friend would take it or something. But, like, yeah, most of the time it's a fine piece of furniture. They just don't want anyone done with it.

[Sasheer]

I have. I don't think anyone's going to want this because it's been outside and they don't make outdoor furniture to be outside. I know it's a lie.

[Nicole]

It's like, why is it deteriorating?

[Sasheer]

I simply don't know. Yeah, I have a little. It's like a little two seater, but it's falling apart. So I think what I have to do is actually, like, take it apart and be like, you don't want this? And, like, put a sign on it.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Otherwise I'm going to take it. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

And then they'll be so disappointed with how it's going to just fall apart under, like, a little bit of pressure from your butt.

[Nicole]

You're going to put a bad Yelp review for Your trash.

[Sasheer]

My neighbor next door loves my trash. I put out a bunch of shoeboxes, and she took them.

[Nicole]

Oh, my gosh.

[Sasheer]

And I didn't, like, break them down. And she was like, I'm taking them for the children. I don't know what children need. Shoe boxes.

[Nicole]

You know, all the. All the hungry children who need shoe.

[Sasheer]

Boxes, they're hungry for that cardboard. My mother was also a trash lady.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Our piano was from the trash. My dollhouse was from the trash. And my sister had a dollhouse that my mom, like, had bought. And we just disagreed on. On everything. On the. On the interior. She wanted, like, plain, boring stuff, and I wanted to wallpaper that tall house, so. So then she got me the trash one, and I was so excited. One but thing. I'd be like, no, I want to wallpaper the nice one. But I was like, no, this trash one will be what I want it to look like.

[Nicole]

And what did it look like?

[Sasheer]

It looked like trash. Like, I wallpapered it and stuff.

[Nicole]

What do you wallpaper it with? Like, construction paper? Like actual wallpaper.

[Sasheer]

Have you never been to a Michaels?

[Nicole]

Yeah, I've been to the Michaels. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

They have wallpaper for doll houses.

[Nicole]

It's scaled down. Why would I know that this?

[Sasheer]

I had no clue.

[Nicole]

I didn't. Never would have thought it was actual wallpaper for doll houses. Yes.

[Sasheer]

Well, if there's dollhouse furniture.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

There's dollhouse accessories. So there's wallpaper for doll houses.

[Nicole]

Of course.

[Sasheer]

I was thinking there's not really paint for doll houses. You just have to buy the samples that are smaller than. Because you're not gonna need a gallon of paint.

[Nicole]

Certainly not.

[Sasheer]

And you can wire a dollhouse so that the lights work.

[Nicole]

That's fun.

[Sasheer]

We never got to that point. And then when we moved, we left those dollhouses for the two little girls who moved in after us.

[Nicole]

That's really cute.

[Sasheer]

Isn't that nice?

[Nicole]

That's very nice.

[Sasheer]

Probably in the trash now.

[Nicole]

Well, definitely. I'm sure they grew up and maybe destroyed the dollhouses at some point.

[Sasheer]

Why would you say that?

[Nicole]

Well, because they're kids.

[Sasheer]

Why would you say that they destroyed it?

[Nicole]

I mean, not like, you know, like, hammer it, but, you know, maybe they played so hard with it that eventually it fell apart.

[Sasheer]

I thought you thought they were hammering my hard work in arts and crafts.

[Nicole]

No, they really appreciate it for years.

[Sasheer]

Okay, thank you. So did you not have dollhouses growing up?

[Nicole]

I guess I didn't.

[Sasheer]

Did you have Polly Pockets Malibu Dream Houses?

[Nicole]

No, I did have Barbies.

[Sasheer]

So where do they live?

[Nicole]

In my house.

[Sasheer]

That house is too big.

[Nicole]

Yeah. I don't. I don't remember having a smaller house for them.

[Sasheer]

Did you have cars for them? Did they travel?

[Nicole]

I do think. I do think they had cars. Yeah. Okay.

[Sasheer]

What kind of cars?

[Nicole]

I don't remember. You know, I'm not a car person.

[Sasheer]

I know. But I remember my sister had a. It was like a 65 Cadillac that her Barbies drove in, and I didn't like it because it was too big. My Barbies had a white Ferrari and they had a. A Jeep Wrangler, A pink Jeep.

[Nicole]

Oh, that's funny. Mm.

[Sasheer]

And I think a Camaro. I think that one was a hand me down. So Catherine had that one.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer]

Which is not nice. I was always like, I'll take the new things, but.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

I can't believe your. Your, like dolls didn't have a home. You were. You had homeless dolls, unhoused dolls, if you will.

[Nicole]

I did.

[Sasheer]

Living in a shelter of your house.

[Nicole]

But they, you know, they always looked amazed.

[Sasheer]

They always looked nice. Well, you should probably take a break.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer]

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[Nicole]

Doable.

[Sasheer]

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[Nicole]

We're back.

[Sasheer]

I've been thinking. Do you ever think you're like, I need a hobby, but you are like, kind of busy and don't need a hobby. That's where I'm at right now.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

So I have this like crescent moon thing that's on my wall. It is like a shelf system, if you will.

[Nicole]

Yeah, I've seen it.

[Sasheer]

But it's so small you can't put nothing in it.

[Nicole]

Right.

[Sasheer]

So I was like, what if I turn into a faux terrarium with like fake foliage and fake trees and flowers? Yeah, I don't have time. Time for that.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

I got to go to Michael's, pick up all this stuff and then hot glue.

[Nicole]

Or could you just order it to your house?

[Sasheer]

I could, but I'm trying to be more mindful about what I order to the house. I got rid of Prime.

[Nicole]

Nice.

[Sasheer]

I have it through December, so I'm. You can still use it. I can still use it, but I did cancel it because I think it's wild that I order things and they come tomorrow.

[Nicole]

Yeah, it's pretty wild.

[Sasheer]

So I was like, let's not do that anymore. I'm trying to be old school now.

[Nicole]

Is it detrimental for like, like gas purposes, like petroleum or like. I know there's downsides to it, but like, what, what do you know are the downsides of having it come tomorrow?

[Sasheer]

I don't know. I was walking around my house the other day before I canceled it, and I was like, where the is this dumb thing I ordered? Why isn't it here? I was like freaking out cuz it wasn't there in a day. And I was like, listen.

[Nicole]

Oh, so it's for yourself?

[Sasheer]

Yeah, kind of.

[Nicole]

Got it.

[Sasheer]

It's insane that I have this like sense of entitlement that like shit's going to arrive to my house the next day. Also, I went on Amazon to watch a movie and I had to fucking pay for it. Then what the fuck is prime for?

[Nicole]

That is a really good point. Yeah. If it's on Amazon prime and I have prime, I should be able to watch it. Yes. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

And then did you know Apple doesn't have everything you ever want to see?

[Nicole]

No, they don't have everything.

[Sasheer]

Why not? If I'm renting It. Why don't you have everything I want to see? I'm so mad.

[Nicole]

I don't know.

[Sasheer]

I was trying to watch lucky number 11 and Amazon was like, sign up for Sphere. I was like, what is Fear?

[Nicole]

Who's Fear?

[Sasheer]

I don't know.

[Nicole]

Yeah, there's so many random. You know, I'm sure they're. They are real companies, but, you know, like, why do I have to get this thing to watch the thing?

[Sasheer]

I don't know. Yeah, I want a blockbuster to open up.

[Nicole]

That'd be so nice. Listen, they should.

[Sasheer]

They really should.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Because at 8:00pm last night, I was fiddling around on my TV trying to watch Lucky Numbers 11.

[Nicole]

And who told you about Lucky Number 11? Why were you, like, why are you in the mood to watch it? You didn't stumble upon it like you were.

[Sasheer]

I've never seen it before in my whole life.

[Nicole]

Well, how did you get into it?

[Sasheer]

I just. I needed to watch it. I am watching all of Josh Hartnett's filmography.

[Nicole]

Oh, okay.

[Sasheer]

No, I'm not. The nice man in my life was like, I think he'll like it.

[Nicole]

And I said, oh, okay. Nice.

[Sasheer]

But at 8pm last night, if there was a blockbuster, I would have gone to the blockbuster.

[Nicole]

That would be really nice if it had a resurgence.

[Sasheer]

Right?

[Nicole]

They still exist. They at least tweet.

[Sasheer]

Like, I think there's one left.

[Nicole]

Ah.

[Sasheer]

And I think it's in Arkansas. Don't quote me.

[Nicole]

Okay, I'm gonna quote you. No, no, Nicole told me. No.

[Sasheer]

Ally, will you look up where it is?

[Nicole]

Yeah, but. Yeah, I think that'd be great because. Yeah, we can't. It's frustrating to, like, not find the thing you're looking for because it doesn't exist anywhere.

[Sasheer]

Isn't it nuts?

[Ali]

Last blockbuster is in Bend, Oregon.

[Sasheer]

Oh, I was wrong. I said Arkansas.

[Nicole]

Yeah, Arkansas is here. In.

[Sasheer]

Oregon's there.

[Nicole]

Good job. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

At least I think. I don't know.

[Nicole]

Yeah, I think so. That feels right.

[Sasheer]

Do you remember when I went to Sundance and I had no idea where Utah was?

[Nicole]

And it was so cold, I couldn't believe it.

[Sasheer]

There was dogs dressed more warmly than me. I was in, like, just a jean.

[Nicole]

Jacket and, like, Converse. Like, didn't have snow boots.

[Sasheer]

People are. I had no idea.

[Nicole]

Blew me away.

[Sasheer]

I thought it was in this. I. I don't know where I thought.

[Nicole]

It was, but I know it was.

[Sasheer]

Where is Utah? California is here. Nevada's here. I don't know.

[Nicole]

It's kind of like, isn't it, like, in, like, this little Quadrant with, like, Nevada, Utah, Arizona. The other one. What's the fourth one? Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Is that Colorado?

[Nicole]

Oh, yeah. I think it's Colorado maybe. Then Utah, Arizona, Nevada.

[Sasheer]

Ally, can you pull up a map of the United States of America?

[Nicole]

We gotta figure this out.

[Sasheer]

I mean, kind of. We learned this in school.

[Nicole]

Oh, for sure. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Did not retain it. I constantly don't know where I am. I'll be, like, doing shows and I'm like, where am I? Am I high or low? Whoa. That's not where I thought it was.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Utah, Colorado, New Mexico, Arizona. And the Nevada is between California and Utah. But this scale looks crazy to me. That's not how I thought it looked.

[Sasheer]

That's not how I thought Utah. You know, I. I think I. Utah was there where Idaho was. And then I thought Colorado was up north. Whoa. Colorado is down.

[Nicole]

This is down, man.

[Sasheer]

And you know what?

[Nicole]

So down?

[Sasheer]

Wyoming. I've never ever thought of. Never. Never my whole life have I thought about Wyoming and where that plays out.

[Nicole]

It's also a surprise to me that it's just there.

[Sasheer]

It's just there. And it's just a perfect square.

[Nicole]

What the.

[Sasheer]

And then Minnesota. I don't think I knew it bordered Canada. I knew Wisconsin. No, I don't think I knew it had lakes, the Great Lakes. I knew Michigan.

[Nicole]

Did. We know Michigan does. Yeah. Wisconsin has access to the lakes, too.

[Sasheer]

Interesting. So is Colorado considered the south or. No. New Mexico starts.

[Nicole]

Yeah. New Mexico's south.

[Sasheer]

Arizona is the South.

[Nicole]

I guess I always thought Colorado was the Midwest, but it doesn't. It's not in the middle. It's. No. Kind of to the south and to the West. Is it Southwest?

[Sasheer]

Is Missouri the South?

[Nicole]

Yeah. Missouri, because is.

[Sasheer]

Midwest is like the south, canonically the South.

[Nicole]

Sure. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Oh, yeah. This is wild as hell, y'. All. Because on the east coast, the south kind of starts up, like, pretty high up. Because Kentucky is the south. But Kentucky and Kansas are kind of parallel.

[Nicole]

Can we get another map to compare? Because I really feel like I'm not believing it for some reason. I'm not believing it. I feel like everything's kind of right. But, like, the scale just feels crazy to me.

[Sasheer]

Don't believe it.

[Nicole]

I don't believe it.

[Sasheer]

I don't believe that map. No, a different. Sure don't. That was kind of a wild map, right? It just felt like Wyoming seemed so prominent. It was like a real, like, map by Wyoming.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Like, I feel like someone's having an agenda. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

We want you to see Wyoming.

[Nicole]

Some days feel real big. Compared to the other ones, I will.

[Sasheer]

Say Wyoming is not as prominent. I barely clocked it.

[Nicole]

Maybe it's the colors.

[Sasheer]

Oh, maybe. So Oklahoma is the south. But I feel like when I went to Oklahoma, they were like, you're not in the South. And I was like, what?

[Nicole]

What did they say?

[Sasheer]

I think they said mid. I don't know. It was a show. So people were screaming at me.

[Nicole]

I mean, to be honest, the Midwest is not even in the middle or west. It's actually pretty easy compared to the rest of the country, now that I'm looking at it. Now I'm really analyzing it. Yeah, it's pretty. Pretty east and north.

[Sasheer]

Pretty east and north. Yeah. What is Montana? What's that considered north? Just the north.

[Nicole]

Wait, where's Montana?

[Sasheer]

Oh, I see it next to North Dakota. Also bordering Canada. Did you know?

[Nicole]

I honestly never thought about the Dakotas.

[Sasheer]

Did you know Idaho borders Canada?

[Nicole]

Apparently a lot borders Canada.

[Sasheer]

This is crazy. We sure. So you could. You could. We could get into Canada easy.

[Nicole]

Do they know? Do they know?

[Sasheer]

From Washington, Idaho, Montana, North Dakota, Minnesota, Wisconsin via boat. Michigan via boat. Ohio via boat. I think the tip of Pennsylvania, you could get in there. New York, Vermont and Maine. We can invade. And New Hampshire. Whoa.

[Nicole]

Let's get him. That's crazy.

[Sasheer]

Compared to Mexico, where it's just California, Arizona, New Mexico, Texas, and by boat, Louisiana.

[Nicole]

It's true.

[Sasheer]

Well, I guess you can't even really count Louisiana.

[Nicole]

That's really by boat. Yeah. It's like a far journey. You wouldn't do that. My goodness.

[Sasheer]

Wow. And Alaska borders Canada. How do we get Alaska? That seems weird. I actually don't know. I don't know the country in between our state. That's just like. I think one of our territories is Samoa or Samoa.

[Nicole]

Maybe Samoa. Is that ours?

[Sasheer]

I think. I think some of it is ours, I think. What are our territories? Well, I know the US Virgin Islands, Puerto Rico. Trying to think of. I think it's like the U.S. samoa or Samoa. I heard someone say Samoa and I don't know what's correct.

[Nicole]

I don't either. I don't know, like France and France.

[Sasheer]

Just like that. France and France.

[Nicole]

Well, yeah. Like if people.

[Sasheer]

The French say France.

[Nicole]

I think so. Well, like Bangladesh. Bangladesh.

[Sasheer]

Oh, yes, yes, yes.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

But you've been to Bunk.

[Nicole]

I've been to Bangladesh, yes.

[Ali]

The US has five permanently inhabited territories. Puerto Rico, U. S. Virgin Islands, Samoa.

[Nicole]

You.

[Ali]

Samoa.

[Sasheer]

But only part of Samoa, right?

[Ali]

Yeah, there's a.

[Sasheer]

Because I. Yeah, yeah.

[Ali]

It's called the American Samoa. So sorry, there Must be a differentiation. And then Guam and then the Northern Mariana Islands.

[Nicole]

Oh yeah, me either. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Where are they at?

[Nicole]

Who's Mariana?

[Sasheer]

Yeah, who's Mariana?

[Nicole]

Why is she at the islands? Well, now we have that. She don't have anymore. Yes.

[Sasheer]

You don't have them at all. They're just named after her in memory. I was on the Internet this morning and there is an island off of India. Maybe it's not even. Yeah, it's an island off the coast of India where the people who live there are. They. They reject modern technology. They reject everything. They don't let people come in. They shoot like low flying planes. They shoot people who try to talk to them. So it's illegal to go there because it's dangerous for you. And I kind of like it.

[Nicole]

I do like that.

[Sasheer]

I kind of want to like, I want to go and live. I don't want to learn. They're not affected by AI.

[Nicole]

Yeah, but. But you couldn't go there because you get shot.

[Sasheer]

Yes, but I'm friendly looking. I think they would be like, well, not her.

[Nicole]

I feel like that's like, like a girl being like, well, I can change him. He won't be bad to me. Yes.

[Sasheer]

This year. And I'm that girl. I alli. Sorry. Can you look up what that island's called? Wow, really into geography.

[Nicole]

Today we're learning.

[Sasheer]

But will we retain?

[Nicole]

No.

[Ali]

Okay, so the Mariana Islands, also just called the Marianas and it is in the Northwest Pacific Ocean by Hawaii.

[Sasheer]

Oh, okay. Now can you look up island off of India with people who don't like people.

[Nicole]

I.

[Sasheer]

I'm the worst.

[Ali]

Literally, I say when I type in island off of India, the. It fills in with hostile natives.

[Nicole]

Oh my God.

[Ali]

North Sentinel island, located in the Andaman Sea. Sorry if I'm saying that wrong. Is home to the Sentinelese people who are known for their hostility towards outsiders and are one of the last uncontacted tribes. The Indian government protects the island and its inhabitants, forbidding contact and travel within a certain radius.

[Sasheer]

Isn't that fun? And at first they did try to establish contact with them and like send people to like, you know, research them or like, and they, I think they eat coconut and fish and that's what they survive on. So like, they would try to bring gifts of sam or like fish and coconuts and they would shoot you. And then I think there's only like one or two known people who've made contact with them.

[Nicole]

Whoa.

[Sasheer]

Isn't that interesting?

[Nicole]

That is very interesting.

[Sasheer]

I think we, we could take a Lesson from them. Go back to basics.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Stick to your own kind.

[Sasheer]

Well, not that. Not that far.

[Nicole]

Is that what they're doing?

[Sasheer]

Yeah, sure. But like, not like that.

[Nicole]

They're standing their ground. They're keeping. They're keeping to themselves, making sure there's no trespassers or anyone different than them coming across the line. Sure.

[Sasheer]

You can take it like that to share. Also, the only metal they have is from a boat that washed upon the shore. And then they fashioned that into more weapons.

[Nicole]

That's really funny.

[Sasheer]

I like them. They were like a gift. More weapons to make.

[Nicole]

Are they shooting people with guns or with like arrows?

[Sasheer]

And arrows, but, like, enough that they can attack and like kill and make it so nobody can go.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Also, I think there was a tsunami into that. I've learned so much about them.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

There's tsunami, I think 2004. So they sent people to make sure that they were okay, but they are one with the earth. They're fine. They made it to higher ground and then I think shot and killed the people who came to check on them.

[Nicole]

I just try to make sure.

[Sasheer]

Which I think is really funny.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

And I believe it's like there's 500 to 2,000 of these people and they don't know actually how many. And I'm like, my God, that's like so mysterious. I wish I was that mysterious. Like, where is Nicole? Everyone knows where I am at all times.

[Nicole]

It's very mysterious. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

I want to go to an island. I want to be in the sun.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Let's get you to an island.

[Sasheer]

Get me. Maybe we should go to the island of Marianne.

[Nicole]

Yeah. What's it like?

[Sasheer]

How far away is it? Is there an airport? Can we get there? Can we get there? They're really putting you to work today.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Ali]

The distance between LAX and the Northern Mariana Islands is. It's approximately an 18 hour flight, including transfers.

[Sasheer]

Transfers over the ocean in the middle of the sky. I gotta get off the plane.

[Nicole]

You just plane onto another plane in the sky. And this is like this plane's run out of gas. Now we gotta go back.

[Sasheer]

That's so funny.

[Ali]

On a travel website now.

[Sasheer]

Yeah.

[Ali]

You would have to. Okay, so you'd go from LA to Narita and then from there to Singapore. And then this. Wait, this is not making any sense.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Wait, this must be it. Yeah. You.

[Ali]

You go to this Saipan International Airport and then from there you must travel to the islands.

[Sasheer]

Oh, so they only do flights out of Singapore.

[Nicole]

Oh, wait, I thought it was near Hawaii. Or was that A different island. Where was it?

[Sasheer]

Yeah. Wait, are you sending us to the island where there's hostile people who live there and want to kill us? Trip advisors. Like, this is how you get there.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Like, no one wants them there. We're like, we have directions.

[Sasheer]

We have directions. You can absolutely go.

[Nicole]

Seems like a lot of people aren't looking. Yeah, they're like just a question mark. It's like much you want to go there.

[Sasheer]

It's like, if you want to go to an island, you have the Caribbean right there.

[Nicole]

So many islands we can go to.

[Sasheer]

Hawaii's right there. Well, not right there. It's a little ways away.

[Nicole]

But it's much closer than 18 hours.

[Sasheer]

It is, but I want to go to Guam.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

I mean, what a fun name.

[Nicole]

Guam. That is a fun name.

[Sasheer]

I just went to Guam. I would be like, oh, my God, what did you do in Guam?

[Nicole]

What is there to do in Guam?

[Sasheer]

I don't know.

[Nicole]

I don't either.

[Sasheer]

Ali. Yeah.

[Ali]

And just to wrap up the Mariana Islands, it's south, southeast of Japan, west southwest of Hawaii and north of New guinea and east of the Philippines.

[Nicole]

See, now I need a world map. I really don't understand that.

[Sasheer]

We don't understand where that place is.

[Nicole]

The concept of where Hawaii, Hawaii, and Japan are, that's not making sense in my head.

[Sasheer]

Okay, the United States is here. Hawaii is here.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Japan is here.

[Nicole]

Oh, okay, great. I think so. Then Marianne is in between these two.

[Sasheer]

I think it's up there.

[Ali]

And then what there is to do in Guam. Amazing diving, coral reefs.

[Nicole]

Ooh. So island stuff.

[Ali]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

Yes. Just fun island stuff.

[Sasheer]

I would go, oh, there's that world map. Oh, that's a bad map.

[Nicole]

Only got parts of the world.

[Ali]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Oh, it's above Australia.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer]

All right. Wow, that water looks blue. Whoa. Guam. Wow.

[Nicole]

It's Guam.

[Sasheer]

M. Guam. It's what I've always dreamed of. We should take a break. I think I'm gonna retire to an island.

[Nicole]

Nice.

[Sasheer]

I think that's what I'm gonna do.

[Nicole]

That sounds great.

[Sasheer]

Do you think you'll retire to somewhere?

[Nicole]

I guess I haven't thought about retiring to somewhere.

[Sasheer]

Okay. The year is 20 something, and I can't do math that quick. Okay, you're 86 years old, 92 years old. Where are you gonna retire to? All of your friends are dead.

[Nicole]

Well, Dan, I guess it doesn't matter.

[Sasheer]

It's just you.

[Nicole]

It's just me. I don't know.

[Sasheer]

And a cat that you adopted named Bojangles.

[Nicole]

This cat lasted that long at Some point, your last friend died, and then.

[Sasheer]

You adopted Pochenkles, who's an orange tabby cat is missing hair in some parts.

[Nicole]

Oh. All right.

[Sasheer]

He has one eye.

[Nicole]

All of that seems complicated.

[Sasheer]

He's really sweet.

[Nicole]

Okay, how do you like that? I mean, I plan on going to Okinawa, Japan next year, so I actually still haven't been there yet, but it looks awesome. And it's an island and it's where I'm from, so maybe I'll like, be born there and die there.

[Sasheer]

I like that. That's full circle.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Oh, my God. I'd have to go back to Red Bank, New Jersey.

[Nicole]

You'll have to.

[Sasheer]

Well, if I wanted to be a circle. Okay, now create a future for me.

[Nicole]

Okay. You're 86 years old. You have a pet turtle, and you race it every morning.

[Sasheer]

Okay.

[Nicole]

And yeah, all your friends are dead. It's just you. Where are you gonna be?

[Sasheer]

Guam. Or since I'm so old, maybe I'll try to establish contact with that tribe. And if they kill me, they kill me.

[Nicole]

It's a pretty epic way to go.

[Sasheer]

But maybe they'll be like, turtle. And I'll be like, whoa, you know the word turtle?

[Nicole]

They're gonna see you holding the turtle.

[Sasheer]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

And they'll be like, wait, yeah, is.

[Sasheer]

That a turtle on a boat holding a turtle? Turtle.

[Nicole]

One English word they know is turtle.

[Sasheer]

Uh huh. And then I learned their language and I live out my. My last days with them.

[Nicole]

Okay. I mean, yeah, we don't know how old these people were that were visiting. Maybe they're like, oh, if you're gonna like, live the rest of your days out, you may as well be here. Yeah, but if you're like, young, we don't have room for you.

[Sasheer]

We don't have room. And they're naked and I'm like, by. By the time I'm, you know, 90, 80, whatever. Let me be naked on an island.

[Nicole]

Nice. Yeah. Let it all out.

[Sasheer]

Yeah, it's nice. Should we answer your questions?

[Nicole]

Let's do it. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

I really want to retire to an island.

[Nicole]

It does sound nice.

[Sasheer]

Where's Okinawa?

[Nicole]

It's like south of Japan. Or it's like in Japan, but, you know, very southern part. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

I wonder if it's near Nagasaki.

[Nicole]

It's not. It's like really far.

[Ali]

So this is called BFF Euro Trip from Aaron. Hi, Nicole and Sashir and the wonderful team. I'm about to go on a three week trip across Europe with my best friend. We've been friends for 20 years, but have Never traveled together. Any advice or trips for navigating it? Once we're there, I'd love to sit in a nice chair. And my best friend has unmedicated adhd. Thank you.

[Nicole]

We've never done three weeks. I don't think we've done two weeks.

[Sasheer]

Yeah. I think two weeks has been our tippity top. But I think we could do three weeks.

[Nicole]

I think we could do three weeks. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

This is tough because I think we're both go with the flow kind of people where it's like we wake up and if there is no plans for the day, it's like, oh, what do you. Oh, I thought of this. Or we could do this. And it's just like a conversation about, like, what the best thing is to do. But if you're like type A and type B people, that might be a little hard.

[Nicole]

Yeah. I mean, we don't know what type they are.

[Sasheer]

No.

[Nicole]

I guess.

[Sasheer]

Have a conversation about what your expectations are for the trip.

[Nicole]

That's nice. I do like that. Yeah. And maybe do you have some stuff planned beforehand before you even take the trip? Not completely. Because it is nice to have, like, room for free time or discovering things. But yeah, maybe, like.

[Sasheer]

Yeah.

[Nicole]

I think the expectation talk would also be helpful because you don't want to assume that your friend knows what's going on, and your friend shouldn't assume that you know what's going on. You might have two totally different ideas of what the trip's gonna look like.

[Sasheer]

Yeah. And if they're moving and grooving through Europe, it's like, how are you, like on a train? How are you on a plane?

[Nicole]

What's your sleep schedule like? Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Do you sleep during travel? Are you. Do you get to the airport early or the train station early? Like, you should have all those conversations.

[Nicole]

Do you need a white noise machine to go sleep?

[Sasheer]

I don't know why I thought you were gonna say a wet nap, like a, like a wet wipe thing. And I was like, why would they need a wet wipe? The white noise machine makes sense.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Or do you use wet wipes to clean everything? Yeah.

[Sasheer]

How clean are you? But do you want to go out to eat for dinner or do you want to, like, go to the grocery store and like, cook or like. Well, if you're in a hotel. Well, if you're an Airbnb.

[Nicole]

Yeah. They might be in Airbnbs, so they might want to cook.

[Sasheer]

Yeah. I think it's just having a full blown conversation where you don't have to go through every day. But be like, if you don't have, like, the big things, plan. Plan the big things. Like, do you want to spend a day at the museums or do you want to, like, go to the coast of somewhere? Like, just, you know, plan that out and then. Then live day by day.

[Nicole]

This Live, laugh, love.

[Sasheer]

Live, laugh, love day by day.

[Nicole]

Oh, dear Lord, these things, those three things. I don't know it has these things. I pray these these things. I pray these things.

[Sasheer]

I pray to love thee more dearly day by day. Love thee more nearly day by day.

[Nicole]

Lovely.

[Sasheer]

What's our next question? Because that one was solved.

[Ali]

Hi, Nicole and Sashir. Love the podcast and thank you for all that you do to help me stay sane. I was wondering if you have any advice for a friend who was a terrible interrupter. For context, this person is my friend and roommate that I met through a mutual friend who knew that I was looking for a roommate. Since then, we've become good friends and live together very well. The only problem is she's a terrible interrupter. I mean, it's truly unbelievable. She does it so often that I'm starting to question her self awareness. I don't know if our other friends notice it. It's kind of a hard thing to bring up. I'm sure I notice it more than anyone because we live together. I thought about just kindly telling her that she does this, but we haven't known each other for that long, and knowing her personality and her insecurities, I don't think she would take it well. I've also tried saying things like what I was going to say was, or as I was saying, but she either doesn't notice or doesn't care. Our living situation has been really good so far, but this makes me angry. And when I'm annoyed with her, it's about this. I don't want to mess things up, but I also don't want to let my annoyance fester. Any advice? Thank you.

[Nicole]

Mm. I do think you just say something because, yeah, you don't want to let it fester. And like, like, just keep collecting annoyances every time you have a conversation. But also, like, I don't know what. I have no idea how to fix this either because I. We have a friend who interrupts and I've tried to, like, get in there with what I want to say or, like, wait till they're done talking and then be like, and here's my side of what I want to say. But like, yeah, I. And also, I've actually said out loud, like, I don't like, when people. Or like, I can't. Like, if it. You know, it doesn't feel good when, like, it feels like people are just talking over me and I don't get a word in. And then. But like, it hasn't changed. So then I don't know. I don't know what to do about that.

[Sasheer]

I don't know either, because I have the same problem. And I've started to just keep talking, and then it turns into talking at each other. Like, the volume gets raised and I'm like, who's gonna win? It's gonna be you. It'll just be you.

[Nicole]

I will.

[Sasheer]

Yes, yes. That's what happens. And I. My therapist has said that I should just go, hey, girl. I was talking here.

[Nicole]

Hey, girl.

[Sasheer]

And she was like, you know, put it in your own words, but, like, the sentiments. Like, hey, can I just finish what I was saying real quick? And I feel like I've said that. And they're like, well, let me just finish what I'm saying real quick. And I'm like, well, all right. I don't know.

[Nicole]

I tried.

[Sasheer]

So this is tough.

[Nicole]

It's pretty tough. Yeah. I guess if you're a person who interrupts, I think, you know, the person who wrote in kind of clocked it. They probably don't have self awareness or like, they just really can't see that. Like, oh, like, the other person also needs to get words in too. Or like, I should pause for a second to listen. Which sounds so basic, but it's like, that's how a conversation works.

[Sasheer]

Yes.

[Nicole]

And how do you explain that to somebody?

[Sasheer]

I don't know, but sometimes I do things that I don't realize. Like, I actually do not realize, like that nice man who's in my life. I didn't realize that when I get excited, I turn directly to his face and scream the things I'm excited about. And he very kindly one day was like, hey, I love you very much, but sometimes when you get excited, you scream so loud directly into my face. I went, me? No, I don't. And then not five minutes later, I was like. And he went, hey. And I went, oh, no. That was it. And he was like, huh? And then last night I got excited about something and I gently turned my face away and screamed. And he went. He's like, I know you're working on it, but maybe when you're excited, you don't scream.

[Nicole]

That's really funny. You're like, so the problem is me turning to your face. I'll just turn Away from you and scream.

[Sasheer]

Well, if I had turned all the way around, but his face was here and I just turned like this, just.

[Nicole]

Like beside his face.

[Sasheer]

Uh huh. He was like, no, not that one either.

[Nicole]

And then I did do one where.

[Sasheer]

I turned fully around.

[Nicole]

He went, there we go. So it's just the back of your head he's looking at, you know, where I'm creeping.

[Sasheer]

Oh my God. So maybe, and I haven't tried this with my friend who interrupts, but I think maybe I could be like, hey, did you know you interrupt a lot? Like one on one.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

And then like when she does it be like, there it is. I'm sorry to point it out.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Because it was really help. I really didn't know that I would turn to him, open my mouth and like scream. And he was like, you do it right by my ear too. He's like, you kind of like lean in.

[Nicole]

I think that's good. Yeah, I like that. Because even if it doesn't change immediately or at all, you did say it once. So it kind of gives you the open door to keep being like, hey, this is what I was talking about. It's happening right now, you know, as opposed to, to like, I guess. Yeah. Like bringing it up like around other people or like, or just keeping it to yourself or hinting at it. Yeah, if. Yeah. A one on one one talk of like, I don't know if you realize this and yeah, it could be as like, like as understanding as possible.

[Sasheer]

Like.

[Nicole]

Yeah, you know, you're probably so excited to talk and I love hearing you talk, but it's a little hard for me to like get my opinions in a conversation. And I, I think what like makes me excited about hanging out with you is the back and forth that we have. So I would love if you can like have a moment to like see when I'm trying to talk or like actually hear what I'm saying and like, let me get in there. And then if, yeah, if it happens in real time, you'd be like, okay, that's what I was talking about. And hopefully eventually they're like more aware of it.

[Sasheer]

And I think the key to criticizing like a characteristic of somebody is saying, I'm saying this lovingly. I'm not like trying to offend you. I love who you are as a person. Because I needed to hear all those things before I was told I screamed in their face.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Which even like recanting, it does sound crazy that I scream in someone's face. I believe it.

[Nicole]

No, it, I'M not surprised at all.

[Sasheer]

Do I scream in your face? I know in the car I make loud yelps and you get scared.

[Nicole]

Yeah, that has happened.

[Sasheer]

Sorry.

[Nicole]

You gasp, you scream, you say, look, I'm like, I'm driving.

[Sasheer]

Sometimes there's things you can't see.

[Nicole]

I'm trying to be safe. I don't. I don't know if you scream in my face. But also, I don't know. I think I'm maybe just used to your levels, your highs, your lows, you know?

[Sasheer]

Okay, so solved.

[Nicole]

There was a moment where you.

[Sasheer]

I would put my fingers in your face.

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

And I didn't know.

[Nicole]

And I did. And I did tell you. I was like, hey, this is thing that you do where you put your hands and your fingers in my face. And I would like you to stop. And you're like, that's. Why would I do that? And I was like, I also don't know, but I would like it to stop.

[Sasheer]

Did you have to tell me multiple times?

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Or.

[Nicole]

I think there was a moment where you did it again. I was like, that's what I'm talking about. And you're like, oh, I guess I do do it. But then I think pretty quickly you did stop.

[Sasheer]

What was I like, wiggling finger. What was I doing?

[Nicole]

I think maybe you were wiggling fingers or, like, pointing or. I don't know. It was like how you were, like, expressing something. I don't know. But they were always, I'm a nightmare human.

[Sasheer]

And because screaming, I'm pointing.

[Nicole]

I think because. I think I noticed it more because you smoked all the time.

[Sasheer]

So it's like.

[Nicole]

So, like, not only are you. Your hands here in my periphery, but I'm smelling the smoke. Yeah.

[Sasheer]

I'll forever be sorry about that.

[Nicole]

It's okay. I'm glad that you were able to make the adjustment.

[Sasheer]

Here's the thing. I'm having, like, a little bit of. Not, like an identity crisis, but I'm like, I do yell when I'm excited. Do I get up and yell?

[Nicole]

No, I don't think you get up and yell. I don't think so.

[Sasheer]

I have to yell.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Sometimes you'll straighten your whole body and be like.

[Sasheer]

Oh, my God.

[Nicole]

But you'll still be seated. Or you'll slide.

[Sasheer]

Like, oh, my God, I do slide. And it's also really wild to see somebody do that. Because I was like, oh, I do do that. I also do a thing when I'm flabbergasted. I'll sit right up. Like, if I'm Reclined. I'll sit up and be like, what? So sheer. Last night, I. So that nice man and I were talking about how you make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

[Nicole]

Oh, yeah. I assumed it was a conversation you're already having because you're texted.

[Sasheer]

Well, because I needed an opinion, and I'm in the minority. I'll ask you guys too. So peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Are you using one knife or two knives?

[Ali]

I'm using a knife and a spoon, to be honest, because I think that it's easier to spread jelly with the back of a spoon.

[Sasheer]

Casey.

[Nicole]

I use one knife.

[Sasheer]

That seems to be the consensus. Everybody's using one knife, and then there's freaks who use spoons. The spoon blew me away. The spoon. When I read about the spoon, my body went straight. I was like, what do you mean we're ladling jelly?

[Nicole]

I mean, it does make sense like that. Yeah. If you use a knife, it's probably gonna slide off the knife, but I guess I don't care. I also haven't made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in years, maybe decades.

[Sasheer]

Nobody has.

[Nicole]

It's also funny because on our group text, people were like, well, when I'm at somebody else's house, I use two knives to be respectful.

[Sasheer]

And I'm like, when are you making.

[Nicole]

Peanut butter jelly sandwiches somebody else's house?

[Sasheer]

You never know.

[Nicole]

But I'm a guest making a PB and J.

[Sasheer]

And then I have another question. When you sleep, I don't remember what your answer was. Tummy side or back side? That's so wild that you immediately had an answer. Because my question was, well, what are the conditions of the sleep? Am I very tired? Am I not that tired?

[Nicole]

Yeah.

[Sasheer]

Am I just napping? Different positions for different types of sleep.

[Nicole]

Interesting. No, I. It feels bad for my body to sleep on my stomach or my back.

[Sasheer]

Oh.

[Nicole]

Like, my. My lower back will hurt in either of those positions.

[Sasheer]

Interesting. When I'm going for a hard slumber where my mouth is open, I'm like, side and tummy.

[Nicole]

Okay.

[Sasheer]

And then if I'm falling back asleep from, like, waking up at 8am and I should just stay awake, but I'm like, I'll just have a little naparoo that's on my back.

[Nicole]

Oh, do you feel like you're more alert on your back or, like, ready to wake up?

[Sasheer]

Like, maybe.

[Nicole]

Like, it's not as deep of a sleep.

[Sasheer]

Maybe. Maybe that's what I'm going for. But I'm in full REM sleep when I'm napping for two hours.

[Nicole]

You're like, but I'll wake up soon, cuz I'm on my back.

[Sasheer]

Wow. We should end this episode.

[Nicole]

Okay. It was a fun one, huh?

[Sasheer]

It was a fun one, huh? Did you think, for whatever reason, I don't believe that you thought it was a fun one.

[Nicole]

I do.

[Sasheer]

It was a fun one, huh?

[Nicole]

I don't know. I'm just having a good time.

[Sasheer]

I'm just having so.

[Nicole]

Sure.

[Sasheer]

It was a fun one.

[Nicole]

Yeah. Okay.

[Sasheer]

I always have fun with you.

[Nicole]

I always have fun with you. All right. See you later.

[Sasheer]

That was a fun one, huh?

[Nicole]

Oh, wait. If you want to ask me questions, our queer is too. In between our fun times. You can call or text or leave a voice message at 323-238-6554. We also have an [e-mail]. all right, goodbye.

[Sasheer]

I've never been more useless. Sorry.

[Nicole]

Best Friends is a production of Headgum Studios.

[Sasheer]

Our producer is Ali Khan.

[Nicole]

Our executive producer is Anya Konaskaya.

[Sasheer]

The show is edited, mixed and engineered by the great Casey Donahue.

[Nicole]

That was a Headgum podcast.