Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata

Episode: "Sasheer's Hot Dog Shrine is Mostly From Nicole (w/ Harvey Guillén)"
Date: September 17, 2025
Guest: Harvey Guillén
Podcast: Headgum

Overview

In this joyful, openhearted episode, Nicole and Sasheer welcome their friend and actor Harvey Guillén (What We Do in the Shadows) for a hilarious and honest conversation. The trio reminisces about their early performing days, struggles in entertainment, the complexity of true friendship, and the joy and drama of gift-giving (including the legend of Sasheer's hot dog shrine). Along the way, they reflect on industry gatekeeping, forming boundaries, and why some friendships last and others fade. The tone is lively, caring, and often laugh-out-loud funny.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Welcoming Harvey Guillén & Career Highlights

(00:02–02:00, 22:30–26:30)

• Nicole introduces Harvey with accolades, noting his historic Critic’s Choice nomination and work across TV and film.
• Harvey shares recent projects, from "What We Do in the Shadows" to new films and TV.
• The conversation quickly becomes personal and playful, with lots of mutual admiration.

“I haven't seen you with highlighted hair. This is lovely.”
— Nicole (01:33)

2. Audition Fails, Performing, and Learning the Hard Way

(02:01–21:00)

• All three trade stories about disastrous early auditions—from stapling (or not) their resumes, to wearing the wrong outfits, or literally drawing their own headshots.
• They reflect on how arts education often leaves out practical career advice.
• Teachers and directors can sometimes be cruel or play favorites, impacting students' confidence or opportunities.
• The group critiques the “pay your dues” culture in theater/academia and questions arbitrary traditions.
• The conversation is peppered with hilarious moments about crying in Forever 21 and failed dance auditions.

“They also don't tell you that an audition is different than a table read. That is different than the job.”
— Nicole (07:40)

“You want me to be a butcher? What's your plan B?”
— Harvey (50:31)

3. Friendship Tiers, Cake Metaphors & Keeping It Real

(22:30–32:00)

• Harvey introduces his "tiered cake" friendship analogy—top tiers for best friends and partners, wider for acquaintances, and the “crumbs” on the plate for former friends.
• Both hosts and guest agree about the value of friends who aren't in the industry for keeping you grounded.
• Nicole and Sasheer recall moments of celebrating each other's career wins from the start.
• There’s an ongoing playful tug-of-war about who belongs on what friendship tier.

“Friendships are like... a wedding cake. The top is your partner or best friend, then close friends, then acquaintances, and at the bottom—the crumbs.”
— Harvey (23:09)

4. Showbiz, Authenticity & Persistence

(32:00–46:00)

• Harvey discusses how being persistent and authentic (despite Hollywood or teachers trying to mold him) helped him book unexpected roles.
• Nicole and Harvey reflect on how others’ skepticism (from family to counselors) can be overcome with steadfastness.
• The narrative includes how Harvey’s work with designer Christian Siriano helped spark a new, more inclusive men’s line (and led to entire wedding outfits inspired by his Oscar look).

“Each of us is our own mold. That’s why you stand out. That’s why you are a star.”
— Harvey (48:07)

“For the longest time, no one would dress me... Clothes should be for everyone, not just a size 0.”
— Harvey (41:30)

5. The Hot Dog Shrine Saga & The Gift-Giving Dynamic

(62:28–66:03)

• Nicole buys Sasheer a series of hot dog-themed gifts (including a dedicated toaster), which Sasheer doesn't want in her home.
• The friends describe a "shrine" of hot dog paraphernalia in Sasheer's place—mostly from Nicole.
• The two lovingly navigate how to set boundaries on gifts, especially those that don't fit someone’s taste or lifestyle.
• Harvey shares his own experiences with giving and receiving thoughtful gestures among friends.

“You have a hot dog shrine in your house that's comprised of gifts that Nicole has given you. It's mostly from Nicole.”
— Sasheer (63:56)

“If you’re trying to put this cake together with crumbs, they’re not cohesive... it’s a crumb cake, and it’s gonna fall apart.”
— Harvey (55:43)

6. Friendship Boundaries: Letting Go of “Crumb” Friends

(53:34–59:24)

• Honest discussion about ending friendships when someone becomes toxic, distrustful, or simply drains your energy.
• Harvey notes the shift from trying to save every relationship to focusing on those who “stabilize his cake.”
• Both hosts share anecdotes about reconnecting with people only to confirm why they fell out.

“You forget sometimes, when people miss you and you don't miss them—that means someone was giving more to this friendship.”
— Harvey (56:45)

7. Baseball, Dodgers, and Finding Joy in the Little Things

(66:56–71:07)

• Nicole shares her first Dodgers game and jokes about not understanding baseball strategy ("Why are they hitting the ball so far? Bumpy!").
• Harvey describes the thrill of comeback wins and the energy of the stadium.
• Banter ensues about sweepers, ball retrievers, and the universal fun of live sports.

Notable Quotes and Moments

• On school and arts training:
  "No one talks about those moments... all those cry moments in a Forever 21." — Sasheer (07:11)
• On authenticity:
  "I don’t need to fit into a mold, ‘cause each and every one of us is our own mold." — Harvey (48:07)
• On persistence:
  "Success is my only option. Failure is not." — Harvey (46:30)
• On gift-giving:
  "You can’t keep accepting hot dog gifts from me. This is not a hot dog house." — Sasheer (63:36)
• On friendship boundaries:
  "Just focus on the tier that's fixed, that's stable, that's strong. Focus on that." — Harvey (55:49)
• The cake metaphor:
  "If you’re trying to put this cake together with crumbs, it’s a crumb cake, and it’s just gonna fall apart." — Harvey (55:44)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:02 – Nicole introduces Harvey and jumps right into candid friendship
• 02:00–14:00 – Audition disasters, formative failures, and harsh teachers
• 22:30–32:00 – Tiered cake metaphor, true friends vs. acquaintances
• 41:30–43:30 – Harvey’s push for size-inclusion in red carpet fashion
• 46:01–51:00 – On not having a plan B, battling doubts, and choosing your own path
• 53:34–56:11 – Cutting off toxic friends and moving on from “crumbs”
• 62:28–66:03 – The Hot Dog Shrine: Nicole's gifts, Sasheer's boundaries
• 66:56–71:07 – Dodgers game, the simple joy of live sports

Tone & Style

The episode is a loving, fast-paced mix of candor, comic timing, and deep friendship. The hosts and guest riff constantly, trade self-deprecating jokes, and keep the atmosphere warm—even when talking about disappointments or hurt. Harvey, Nicole, and Sasheer’s camaraderie is infectious, making listeners feel like part of a close-knit group.

For New Listeners

This episode encapsulates what Best Friends does best: celebrates honest, supportive friendship, doesn't shy from life’s awkward stumbles, and never takes itself too seriously. Come for the laughs, stay for the real talk—and maybe don’t buy your friend a hot dog toaster (unless you’re really sure they want it).

Find Harvey Guillén on Instagram/Twitter @harveyguillen
Watch for his upcoming projects, including work with Christian Siriano.