In this episode, I sit down with my lovely wife Lauren to explore her story. She shares about growing up as a “good girl,” always chasing approval, achievement, and the A+. But beneath that pursuit was a deeper struggle: the fear of being weak, broken, or not enough. We talk about how that mindset shaped our marriage, her ministry, and her identity—and the powerful moment when she finally laid it all down at Recovery. This conversation is filled with the kind of grace that sets people free. If you’ve ever struggled with perfectionism, people-pleasing, or performance-driven faith, I believe this episode will offer truth and healing to where you are.

In This Episode

Childhood roots of perfectionism and people-pleasing
How "being good" can become a way to avoid needing God
Marriage as the first wake-up call to grace
Hitting the idol of achievement in music ministry
The surrender chip moment: Letting go of control
Embracing powerlessness and understanding grace
How fixed mindset stifled creativity and risk-taking
Moving toward a growth mindset in songwriting
Learning to say “no” and disappoint people with peace
Parenting and people-pleasing under the spotlight
Shame, criticism, and trusting God with your reputation
Remaining vigilant: How perfectionism tries to sneak back in
Final encouragement for those stuck in performance

Resources

Beth Moore's Bible Study: Believing God
TVC Recovery Ministry
Follow Lauren

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Freedom from Performance