Beyond Blind Blaming – Episode Summary

Podcast: Beyond Blind Blaming
Host: Kevin D. St.Clergy (B)
Guest: Elyse Archer (A), Founder of Supersize Life
Episode: Breaking Through Self-Imposed Limits: Sales, Success, and Identity
Date: December 2, 2025

Episode Overview

In this engaging episode, host Kevin D. St.Clergy sits down with mindset and sales coach Elyse Archer to uncover the hidden mindset blocks that hold high achievers back. They discuss how our results are ultimately limited by our self-identity and beliefs, why traditional success chasing leads to dissatisfaction, and the transformative power of investing in personal growth. Archer shares vulnerable stories from her own journey, breaking down practical steps to move beyond self-imposed ceilings—whether in income, confidence, or fulfillment. This conversation is candid, inspiring, and anchored in actionable wisdom for anyone ready to trade blame for true leadership.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Myth of External Success

• Chasing Validation: Many believe happiness and fulfillment arrive after external accomplishments—money, career, possessions—but this often results in lack and dissatisfaction.
  • “I think that a lot of people think again that when I achieve X thing on the outside, I will be successful, I will be happy, I will be fulfilled… Your results will never supersede your identity.” – Elyse (00:00)
• Living True to Oneself: Referencing Bronnie Ware’s Top Five Regrets of the Dying, Archer highlights that the number one regret is not having the courage to live authentically rather than by others’ expectations.
  • “The number one regret that people shared was I wish I had had the courage to live a life true to me…” – Elyse (00:13; 12:38)

2. Breaking Identity Ceilings

• Elyse’s Personal Journey: Despite professional success, Archer felt broken inside. Discovering personal development podcasts led her to question her life’s alignment, culminating in major changes at age 28: a divorce, leaving her corporate job, and starting her coaching business.
  • “I was top of the leaderboard, had a nice house… was married. What I wasn’t telling anyone was on the inside I was feeling completely broken.” – Elyse (03:29)
• Quantum Leaps Require Internal Shifts: Despite years of “improvement,” Archer’s income plateaued until she did focused mindset work, which catalyzed a quantum leap—in six weeks, she turned her annual income into her monthly income.
  • “The inner work…to heal so many limiting beliefs…that I had rediscovered what it was like to have an open heart and to live with wholeness again. And from that place…more money naturally came.” – Elyse (16:41)

3. Investing in Yourself & Facing Fear

• The Decision to Invest: Archer describes scraping together $50,000 for a coaching program she couldn’t “afford,” serving as a pivotal moment for self-worth and transformation.
  • “Because I was so uncomfortable, I had to get under the hood and look at every limiting belief I had ever held…” – Elyse (15:28)
• Choosing Confidants Wisely: She only shared this decision with trusted, like-minded individuals to avoid the projection of others’ fears onto her ambitions.
  • “If they don’t have the results that you want, why in the world are you going to ask them for their opinion on anything?” – Elyse (21:57)
  • “No one else is on the same path as you…they’re just going to water that dream with their fears…” – Elyse (22:58)

4. Mindset, Sales, and Ownership

• Selling from Wholeness: Instead of chasing targets from a place of lack, Archer teaches “selling from wholeness,” focusing on inner alignment and the self-concept of someone who already has the desired results.
• Personal Responsibility vs. Blind Blaming: High performers who break through understand they are the common denominator in their results and take responsibility, rather than blaming markets, bosses, or scripts.
  • “Anytime we’re putting our results outside of us, we haven’t taken full ownership and we’re not in our full power.” – Elyse (28:08)
• Self-Serving Bias in Sales: When things go well, people credit themselves. When not, they blame circumstances—a common protective mindset.

5. Identity & Breaking Patterns

• Shifting Identity for Growth: To reach new goals (e.g., from $10k months to $100k months), you must become the person who believes, thinks, and acts at that new level.
  • “Focus not so much on creating the end result, but focus on creating the version of yourself who has the end result every day.” – Elyse (30:59)
• Judgments on Success: Subconscious negative beliefs about wealthy or high-achieving people (“rich people are greedy,” “gym rats are douchebags”) can hold you back from embodying your next level.
  • “Noticing and being aware of the judgments…on your next level. That will stop you from making more money in your business or in your sales every single time.” – Elyse (34:17)

6. Imposter Syndrome & Inner Child

• Acknowledging the Feeling: Even after reaching new milestones (like buying a new home), Archer felt discomfort—an “inner child” response questioning worthiness.
  • “When the small, younger version of me is still kind of stuck in her old paradigms…she will show up and be like, who are you to live in a house like this?” – Elyse (36:24)
• Practice “Of Course”: Normalizing success re-trains the subconscious, e.g., “Of course. Thank you.” upon achievements.
  • “When something really good happens, I say, of course. Thank you. Of course. Thank you. Just to normalize it and help get both the subconscious mind and the nervous system calibrated to that level of success.” – Elyse (39:12)

7. The Ongoing Power of Environment & Growth

• Continual Self-Investment: Archer credits masterminds, mentoring, and investing in beauty/environment as accelerators for her growth.
  • “The environment that I’m in matters. Wardrobe to me matters…when we invest in ourselves…that is what made a really big difference in my results.” – Elyse (39:51)
• Warning: If your business outpaces your personal development, burnout follows.
  • “People get burned out or they stop liking what they’re doing, especially when they’re business owners, when their business outgrows their personal development.” – Kevin quoting speaker (41:38)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Regret:
  “I wish I had had the courage to live a life true to me rather than what everyone else expected of me.” – Elyse (00:13/12:38)
• On Permission:
  “No one was coming to give me permission to be powerful. No one was coming to tell me that it was time.” – Elyse (00:46/16:15)
• On Expansion:
  “Your desires are green lights…you are going to be called on to constantly expand…You’re never going to see the full picture.” – Elyse (22:58)
• On Self-Investment:
  “When I made my first big, scary investment…that is what made a really big difference in my results.” – Elyse (41:15)
• On Identity:
  “Your results will never supersede your identity.” – Elyse (00:11/30:08)
• On Self-Serving Bias:
  “When salespeople are doing really well, it’s all me. When it’s a bad month…couldn’t be me. The market’s down…” – Kevin (28:44)
• On Comfort Zones:
  “Staying in the comfort zone is not the path. So your comfort zone becomes a cage at a certain point.” – Elyse (26:23)
• On Normalizing Success:
  “When something really good happens, I say, ‘Of course. Thank you.’…help get both the subconscious mind and the nervous system calibrated to that level of success.” – Elyse (39:12)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:00 | The core myth: external success does not equal fulfillment.
• 02:53 | Elyse shares her “misaligned” success story and pivot into coaching.
• 12:35 | The “Top Five Regrets” and the moment that changed Elyse’s money story.
• 15:28 | The bold $50,000 coaching investment and breaking an income ceiling.
• 19:59 | Navigating friends and family’s limiting beliefs about bold decisions.
• 24:59 | Do you need to hit rock bottom to change?
• 27:13 | Victim mindset, blind blaming, and taking radical responsibility in sales.
• 28:44 | Self-serving bias explained.
• 31:58 | Identity-based change—becoming the next-level version of yourself.
• 34:17 | Subconscious judgments on wealth, success, and how they limit us.
• 36:24 | Imposter syndrome, inner child work, and normalizing new levels of achievement.
• 39:51 | The power of continual self-investment and environment.
• 41:38 | Burnout as a symptom of personal growth lagging behind business growth.
• 42:08 | Elyse’s offer: free quantum sales growth video training.

Resources & Follow-Up

Free Training: elisearcher.com/blindblaming (Quantum Sales Growth Methodology – exclusive for listeners)
Connect: @ElyseArcher on all social media platforms

Tone:
Candid, practical, emotionally honest, and empowering—this episode is both a vulnerable and actionable “playbook” for anyone ready to stop blaming circumstances and start leading themselves to greater success and fulfillment.