Why Do White People French Kiss Their Dogs?

Summary

Black and White Advice: Episode Summary – "Why Do White People French Kiss Their Dogs?"

Podcast Information:

• Title: Black and White Advice
• Hosts: Turner Sparks (White) and Phil Duckett (Black)
• Episode Title: Why Do White People French Kiss Their Dogs?
• Release Date: November 25, 2024
• Description: Comedians Turner Sparks and Phil Duckett tackle all your questions on race, delving into even the most challenging topics with humor and insight.

---

1. Introduction and "Do You Know My People?" Segment (00:00 – 10:40)

The episode kicks off with Turner and Phil engaging in a playful yet competitive segment titled "Do You Know My People?" Here, they test each other's knowledge of their respective cultures through a guessing game involving famous personalities from Black and White communities.

• Turner Sparks (00:00): Opens with a humorous jab, "Because you're white. Do you wash your feet or do you just let the water run down like a lot of y'all say?"
• Phil Duckett (00:06): Responds sharply, "Thank you," indicating a light-hearted yet competitive banter.

Notable Moments:

• Phil: "I can't wait to see your knowledge of my people." (02:12)
• Turner: "Who's that?" referring to Phil's selection of Maya Angelou. (04:25)
• Phil: "Maya Angelou, the poet." (03:37)
• Phil: Guesses correctly about Old Dirty Bastard, scoring crucial points. (04:07)

Game Dynamics:

• The hosts exchange points based on correct guesses of cultural figures, highlighting their deep understanding and differing perspectives.
• The segment concludes with Phil narrowly winning, emphasizing the playful rivalry: "You won by one. That's our first time doing it." (10:15)

2. Listener Questions and Discussions (10:54 – 35:00)

Following the introductory game, Turner and Phil transition to answering listener-submitted questions, blending humor with cultural commentary.

a. Toya's Question: Navigating Cultural Differences in Cussing (11:57 – 16:53)

Question:
Toya from LA asks, “When I was in high school, I remember going to my white friend's house and seeing them cuss at their parents. Now my high school kids have white friends who do the same. What should I tell them to do?”

Advice:

• Phil: Suggests maintaining self-discipline and setting boundaries, reflecting on his upbringing: "If you raise your kids right, I don't think you have to worry about that."
• Turner: Offers a contrarian perspective, humorously advising kids to join in cussing to "test the waters," while acknowledging potential repercussions from their own parents.

Notable Quotes:

• Phil (13:00): "If you raise your kids right, I don't think you have to worry about that."
• Turner (13:37): "You're doing them a favor."

b. Cynthia's Question: Handling an Overly Affectionate Dog (16:34 – 22:03)

Question:
Cynthia from Raleigh shares her discomfort with a host family’s dog licking her face and seeks advice on addressing the behavior without offending her boss.

Advice:

• Turner: Suggests preventive measures like wearing a COVID mask to avoid direct contact humorously: "When you see a dog and you see the kids tongue kissing, you put on the mask."
• Phil: Recommends setting clear boundaries with the dog, asserting dominance to discourage unwanted behavior: "You got to be the alpha."

Notable Quotes:

• Turner (18:16): "So you need to go preventative here."
• Phil (19:34): "You don't have to beat the dog. No, down, boy."

c. Gus's Question: Black Men and Excitement for Magic Tricks (30:50 – 35:00)

Question:
Gus from Florida inquires, “Why do black guys get so excited for magic tricks?”

Advice:

• Phil: Explains that what appears as excitement may stem from a mix of fear and cultural conditioning, rooted in religious upbringing and skepticism towards the supernatural: "It's more fear."
• Turner: Reflects on personal experiences with magic shows, highlighting the unexpected reactions: "And then he was like... J.Lo."

Notable Quotes:

• Phil (31:06): "It's not excitement really, it's more fear."
• Turner (31:22): "They literally just ran away."

3. Cultural Insights and Discussions (10:40 – 35:00)

Throughout the episode, Turner and Phil delve into broader cultural observations, particularly focusing on interracial interactions and societal norms.

a. Attitudes Towards Footwear and Appearance (22:08 – 25:43)

The hosts discuss the importance of footwear in Black culture versus perceptions in White communities.

• Phil: Emphasizes meticulous shoe care as a cultural expectation: "If your kicks are busted, you ain't got a shot."
• Turner: Contrasts by noting that White individuals often neglect shoe maintenance, viewing it as less critical.

Notable Quotes:

• Phil (22:30): "Every shoe store has a clearance rack."
• Turner (24:57): "White privilege."

b. Flip Flops and Crocs Debate (25:30 – 27:08)

A humorous exchange about the disdain for flip flops and Crocs, reflecting broader aesthetic preferences and cultural stereotypes.

• Phil: Dismisses flip flops and Crocs as unattractive choices: "I hate the sound of the flop flop."
• Turner: Agrees, adding his personal aversion: "Very against Crocs."

Notable Quotes:

• Phil (25:44): "I hate them. I hate the sound of the flop flop."
• Turner (26:37): "I wear them on the subway."

c. Social Credit and Cleanliness (28:06 – 30:43)

Turner shares his experiences living in China, comparing it to life in New York City, particularly regarding cleanliness and social behavior.

• Phil: Expresses skepticism and concern over strict social credit systems, likening them to dystopian scenarios: "That's like that Black Mirror episode."
• Turner: Elaborates on the stringent cleanliness measures enforced by authority figures, humorously exaggerating potential consequences for minor infractions.

Notable Quotes:

• Turner (29:11): "Social credit score."
• Phil (30:02): "How do you get it back up?"

4. Concluding Remarks and Final Takes (35:00 – End)

The episode wraps up with the hosts sharing lighter moments and reinforcing their camaraderie.

• Turner: Expresses frustration over joke stealing within the community: "I would be furious. I would be like, this is my material."
• Phil: Continues the playful banter, highlighting the importance of originality and respect: "I'm going to stand an ovation."

Notable Quotes:

• Phil (35:27): "This is the work of the devil."
• Turner (36:21): "There's something to that."

5. Key Themes and Takeaways

• Cultural Differences: The episode underscores the nuanced differences between Black and White cultural practices, especially in interpersonal interactions and societal norms.
• Humor as a Bridge: Turner and Phil utilize humor to discuss sensitive topics, making the dialogue accessible and engaging.
• Boundaries and Respect: A recurring theme is the importance of setting boundaries and respecting cultural differences to foster understanding and harmony.
• Stereotypes and Realities: The hosts challenge stereotypes by sharing personal anecdotes and offering balanced perspectives on commonly held beliefs.

6. Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Phil Duckett (04:25): "She's been on Oprah, like, 19."
• Turner Sparks (08:53): "My white boss invited my husband and I over to his house for a Sunday barbecue."
• Phil Duckett (13:00): "If you raise your kids right, I don't think you have to worry about that."
• Turner Sparks (18:16): "So you need to go preventative here."
• Phil Duckett (25:44): "I hate them. I hate the sound of the flop flop."
• Phil Duckett (31:06): "It's not excitement really, it's more fear."
• Turner Sparks (35:16): "Black and white advice, everybody write into us."

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Conclusion: In this episode, Turner Sparks and Phil Duckett effectively navigate the complexities of interracial cultural interactions with wit and wisdom. From playful competitions to addressing genuine concerns, they provide listeners with both laughter and valuable insights into bridging cultural gaps.

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Connect with Black and White Advice: Have a question on race or cultural differences? Email [e-mail] and prepare to be educated in future episodes!

Transcript

[Phil Duckett]

Because you're white. Do you wash your feet or do you just let the water run down like a lot of y'all say?

[Turner Sparks]

No, no, no, I wash my feet.

[Phil Duckett]

Thank you.

[Turner Sparks]

Do people not wash their feet?

[Phil Duckett]

Taylor Swift says she doesn't wash her legs at all. And Travis Kelce said it. His brother said it. The soap runs down your body, so that washes. And I said, this is why white people smell like Fritos, because. Have you ever had a question you wanted to ask opposite race, but you were too nervous to ask?

[Turner Sparks]

I'm Turner Sparks.

[Phil Duckett]

And I'm Phil Duckett.

[Turner Sparks]

And this is Black and White Advice.

[Phil Duckett]

Where we answer all your questions about race, even the scary ones.

[Turner Sparks]

This is Black and White advice.

[Phil Duckett]

Have we started?

[Turner Sparks]

We're on. So this is good. This is a good way to start. Do you start with the segment? We're going to get to the questions later. Right? Advice questions are coming up soon. But before that, do you know my people?

[Phil Duckett]

I love this segment. I love it. I know we've been talking about it for a long time, but I think it's good because it gives us a chance to show people of our culture and see, you know, how deep we are, like, you know, into it.

[Turner Sparks]

I think I know every black person.

[Phil Duckett]

That's a bold statement.

[Turner Sparks]

Like, on, like, you name somebody, if some comedian I know, if it's the guy down the block, I'm going to know him. So I'm pretty confident going in.

[Phil Duckett]

I bet you you won't get half of these people right. I just have a feeling.

[Turner Sparks]

Here's how the game works. So you show me a picture of a black person, I show you a picture of a white person. And then if you can get it in zero guesses, you get. I mean, one guess, you get five points, right? If after that it turns into a yes or no, you can ask, like, 20 questions. You can ask, is it a politician? I can say yes or no. Is it a someone in a band? Whatever. I can say yes or no. Whatever question you want to ask. But each question you ask, your points go down by one. So one question, you get four. If you get in one question, four points. 3, 2, 1, 0. At zero, you just tell me the answer. Whoever gets the most amount of points wins.

[Phil Duckett]

All right. I can't wait to. I can't wait to see your knowledge of my people.

[Turner Sparks]

Do you want me to go first?

[Phil Duckett]

I would love for you to go first.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm actually a little scared now. The fact that you know Rush Limbaugh.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, you should be.

[Turner Sparks]

I Mean, you might know everyone on my list.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

Here we go. Ready? We'll start here.

[Phil Duckett]

Phil Mickelson. Phil Mickelson.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, no. Oh, boy. This could be a.

[Phil Duckett]

Out the gate.

[Turner Sparks]

How do you know Phil Mickelson?

[Phil Duckett]

I play golf.

[Turner Sparks]

God, what the fuck?

[Phil Duckett]

Really going to put Vijay Singh up there. And I got that right, too.

[Turner Sparks]

Chichi Rodriguez. I was going to go with him.

[Phil Duckett]

Probably wouldn't guess that.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, my God. All right, you asked me. I don't feel good.

[Phil Duckett]

Maya Angelou.

[Turner Sparks]

Come on. You can't. That is Secretary of the Treasury.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, my God. Do you think this is Condoleezza Rice?

[Turner Sparks]

Maxine Waters.

[Phil Duckett]

Maxine Waters.

[Turner Sparks]

Wait, so is it a politician?

[Phil Duckett]

No, she's very well known. She's very well known, if you're cultured. Very well known.

[Turner Sparks]

She's not a comedian. I know she's not. Oh, wait. Was that a question?

[Phil Duckett]

Yes. No, no. You was a guest.

[Turner Sparks]

I wasn't. I wasn't.

[Phil Duckett]

Ask.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I said she's not a comedian. Okay. Is she a musical artist?

[Phil Duckett]

Not a musical.

[Turner Sparks]

All right. I don't know who that is.

[Phil Duckett]

This is Maya Angelou, the poet.

[Turner Sparks]

See, I read her. I don't look at her.

[Phil Duckett]

He fucking reads her.

[Turner Sparks]

I'll be honest. I've. I don't think I've ever seen a picture of her. Picture of Maya? Angela.

[Phil Duckett]

I told you I was going to dog walk Turner on this shit. Told you that. All right, let's go. Bring it.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm deleting all the.

[Phil Duckett]

Bring it.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, boy. Oh, boy. You're going to destroy me. Okay.

[Phil Duckett]

Jay and Silent Bob. Jay and Silent Bob.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, my God. This is. I might quit this podcast.

[Phil Duckett]

Old Dirty Bastard.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, that's Old Dirty Bastard.

[Phil Duckett]

Finally. God, I was like, you know, finally.

[Turner Sparks]

I got that right away.

[Phil Duckett]

I can't believe you. And no od. But not Maya Angelo. I've seen you read so many books. I just knew you were gonna know. Maya, she's. Thank you.

[Turner Sparks]

She doesn't write picture books.

[Phil Duckett]

She's been on Oprah, like, 19.

[Turner Sparks]

How many music videos does she have?

[Phil Duckett]

ODB. I ain't gonna lie. I'm shocked you got that. But we're in New York. Wuang Clan is a movement. Even still.

[Turner Sparks]

So Dirty Bastard, Live and Uncut.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay. Now, he redeemed his. Totally redeemed yourself, baby.

[Turner Sparks]

All right. Who's that?

[Phil Duckett]

Robert F. Kennedy. Kennedy. Robert.

[Turner Sparks]

You got it.

[Phil Duckett]

Yes. And did, too. Sorry. Sorry. Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, I'm gonna ramp it up now. You go ahead. I'm gonna make it harder. You're three for three.

[Phil Duckett]

I don't play, buddy. I don't. I play for keeps. Idris Elba.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, that's Idris Elba.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay.

[Turner Sparks]

Did you just put that in there? Because.

[Phil Duckett]

No, no. I knew I had to give you an easy because I didn't think you were gonna get the first two, but I was like, you don't know, Idris.

[Turner Sparks]

What did you think I would get? Did you think I would get my answer?

[Phil Duckett]

I really did. I thought I would get it, and I had a 50, 50 chance. You knew ODB because Wu Tang is such a big thing. But I didn't know, but I really thought you.

[Turner Sparks]

You also gave me a young picture of him.

[Phil Duckett]

I gave you a picture of him.

[Turner Sparks]

But he was like, 19. Anyway, whatever, I got it. Okay. You ready?

[Phil Duckett]

I'm ready. David Byrne.

[Turner Sparks]

Fuck.

[Phil Duckett]

Weird Al.

[Turner Sparks]

I love the Attempt. It's wrong, but what I love about the Attempt is that you saw the outfit. You're like, who would wear, like, a wacky outfit?

[Phil Duckett]

Big Out Joe did a music video. An outfit like that. Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

Do we have footage of that, by the way? So I'll just say this. So now you know. It's musician. You can name the group or the person.

[Phil Duckett]

What's the dude's name from Peaky Blinders?

[Turner Sparks]

I don't know. Peaky Blinders.

[Phil Duckett]

That's who he does look like.

[Turner Sparks]

Was that a question?

[Phil Duckett]

No.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, yeah, you can ask. Yes. No questions.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm just gonna. There's nothing to guess. I don't know who it is.

[Turner Sparks]

Okay. It's David Byrne from the Talking Heads.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. I don't know that.

[Turner Sparks]

I feel like most white people would. I tried to pick ones that most white people would know. I think most white people would know David Byrne. Okay.

[Phil Duckett]

All right, so my turn last. I got. Okay. Ving Reigns.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, what's that guy's name?

[Phil Duckett]

You know who it is?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's an actor.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, man. I don't think I'm gonna be able to guess it, though. Is he, like. Everyone should know his name.

[Phil Duckett]

Most people. Nah, I get you know his name. You definitely know who he is when you see him. But a lot of people know his name. Especially he's in Mission Impossible.

[Turner Sparks]

Wait, is that V. Rams. Yes.

[Phil Duckett]

Bang. Oh.

[Turner Sparks]

Man.

[Phil Duckett]

How did I get that? I don't know. You pull that one out your butthole. Boy, that was crazy.

[Turner Sparks]

I can't even think of what he's.

[Phil Duckett]

Been in Mission Impossible, baby boy. He's Holiday Heart. He's been. He's been in so much.

[Turner Sparks]

Was he in Pulp Fiction.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. Yeah. He's in. He so much. He's been at it a long time.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, you ready?

[Phil Duckett]

Rush Limbaugh. Is that your dad?

[Turner Sparks]

No.

[Phil Duckett]

Can I give you politician?

[Turner Sparks]

Can I give you a hint?

[Phil Duckett]

Yes.

[Turner Sparks]

It's the Maya Angelo of white people.

[Phil Duckett]

Is that Rush?

[Turner Sparks]

That's Rush. That's the Maharashi.

[Phil Duckett]

Is that Rush? Live ball.

[Turner Sparks]

I was like.

[Phil Duckett]

I was like once. I said. I said. Hold on. Call back. Is that Rush? Wow. No, he looks thoroughly Republican.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, of course. That's. Hello, ladies and gentlemen.

[Phil Duckett]

It's. Damn.

[Turner Sparks]

Remember when he got addicted to opioids?

[Phil Duckett]

No. I was nine, so I wasn't really in the lifestyle was. That was a thing. He got hooked on heroin.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. And he. What did he call him? Oh. Ladies and gentlemen, I have to come clean. I've had a slight issue with oxycodone.

[Phil Duckett]

A slight issue.

[Turner Sparks]

Had to take a couple weeks off.

[Phil Duckett]

But you go to rehab.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

What a way to spend that. You better get this. Lauren Hill.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, Lauren Hill. Oh, you kidding me? The m. Education do this.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm impressed you even knew the name of the album. I'm be honest.

[Turner Sparks]

I had the album.

[Phil Duckett]

Do you.

[Turner Sparks]

Every white person had the album. I didn't know that she was very popular with the white community.

[Phil Duckett]

She was very.

[Turner Sparks]

Well.

[Phil Duckett]

Cuz she was in Sister Act.

[Turner Sparks]

I don't think that had to do with that. No. Cuz she was in the Fujis.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

And we. Everyone loved the Fugees. The Fugees cut across all. All races.

[Phil Duckett]

So I could have put. Because, you know, I wasn't going to use her. I was going to use Wyclef. You'd have got him.

[Turner Sparks]

Of course. I would have got Pras. Oh, yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. We knew the whole. See, we're learning.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. Okay. You might be a little deeper than that, though.

[Turner Sparks]

Look at this. All right, we're going to go one more.

[Phil Duckett]

Dave Matthews. Is that Jeremy Piven?

[Turner Sparks]

This is my favorite one. No.

[Phil Duckett]

David Copperfield. No.

[Turner Sparks]

No. But this is by far my favorite. This guy is like a God to white people.

[Phil Duckett]

Musician.

[Turner Sparks]

Yes. That's. You're down to. I'm gonna.

[Phil Duckett]

Dave Matthews.

[Turner Sparks]

Nailed it. What was that? But I feel like I just.

[Phil Duckett]

You didn't win.

[Turner Sparks]

What was that? I was down by three.

[Phil Duckett]

Down by three.

[Turner Sparks]

I got that. I got five points.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

Because I got the Lauryn Hill.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

So that puts me up by two.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. And I guessed once.

[Turner Sparks]

I shouldn't have given you that. Yeah. You won by one. That's it. That's our first time doing it.

[Phil Duckett]

So I got 15 points in good credit. Yeah, that's the scoring system. I get good credit. You get street credit for your points. Your school is called street credit. I get good credit.

[Turner Sparks]

I think I got 15 points. You got 16.

[Phil Duckett]

My credit. I'm about to go get a car.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, that's it. That's been. Do you know my people?

[Phil Duckett]

I love it. I ain't gonna lie. And next time I'm bringing this.

[Turner Sparks]

This is a great. Now we know how it works.

[Phil Duckett]

I got it now.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, we'll be right back with black and white advice. Questions from you got something on your.

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[Turner Sparks]

Hey, you want to get bonus content, early episodes and have your questions answered on the show?

[Phil Duckett]

Well, then subscribe to our [e-mail] blackandwhiteadvice and subscribe right now.

[Turner Sparks]

Do it and we'll give you a shout out on a future episode and.

[Phil Duckett]

I might call you the N word.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, we're back with black and white advice. Are you ready for these?

[Phil Duckett]

These are my favorite part of the show. Honestly.

[Turner Sparks]

Here's the first question. This is from Toya in la. Okay. When I was in high school, I remember going to my white friend's house and seeing them cuss at their parents. Now I have two high school kids of my own. They both have white friends and they go to those friends houses often. What should I tell them to do when they see their white friends cussing at their parents?

[Phil Duckett]

Toya is it what I would tell you to tell your kids is same thing my mama told me. Don't let your little buddy Chad get your life taken. Cause yeah, it's a normal thing. I grew up in an all white cul de sac and all that. And you go to your friend's houses and it does start to rub off. Now we ain't crazy enough to cuss at our parents cause we like our teeth and shit, you know, I mean, but you do. You see them and then you're like, well, he talks like that. So even when I would come back sometimes I would just get, like, a normal little attitude and my mom would be like, I sure hate Turner. Would get you murdered in here. Like, you just.

[Turner Sparks]

You bring that energy home to your mom.

[Phil Duckett]

My mom nipped that in the butt at the door. Baby, you ain't Caucasian. There's going to be some rules in here. So I think. But here's the thing. If you raise your kids right, I don't think you have to worry about that. Because you set the tone early enough, they know what's acceptable and what must not. That's how I feel.

[Turner Sparks]

Okay, I'm gonna complete opposite. Advice, please. If you go to a white family's house and the kids in the family are allowed to cuss at their parents, those are the most liberal parents on earth. You, as a black high school kid, you need to join in.

[Phil Duckett]

Join in the cussing on the.

[Turner Sparks]

At their parents. Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Turner is giving advice that is going to get you.

[Turner Sparks]

That's right, Kathy. I do want some fucking eggs. And then if you say. Because here's the thing. If these are. I'm telling you, my parents never allowed this. No one I know is parents ever allowed it, except for, like, the extreme liberal white parents let their kids because they raised them in a way that, like, oh, no, it's okay, Patrick. Yeah. Do whatever you want. So then therefore, they. There's nothing that would make them happier than to have a black person yelling at them in their own household because they're like, look at me. I'm so, like, accepting. So it's. You're doing them a favor.

[Phil Duckett]

That might sound good in theory. Until the word gets back to your black mama that you cuss these grown people out, your mom is going to beat the shit out of you.

[Turner Sparks]

No, but the word will never get back because people be happy about it. They'll go home and they'll go. I'm so proud of us that we. We allow, like, we allow all voices in our home. Anything is. Anything you can do. There's. I'm telling you, there's white families right now listening and nodding their heads when I say this. This is a gift to them.

[Phil Duckett]

All right, well, I'm gonna tell that by a minority. I'm gonna say this to all the white families. Listen, Your child come to my house and cuss at me. I'm whooping his ass and my child's ass. Let's Go ahead and get the understanding on that. You come to my house talking shit, I'm gonna treat you like a grown man. That's how it goes.

[Turner Sparks]

What about eating, like, finishing dinner? This is something I remember because, like, white families don't make you finish your.

[Phil Duckett]

Dinner, which that's privilege, because y'all, like.

[Turner Sparks]

We have more food, honey, but like any other race.

[Phil Duckett]

No, no, you went. I can still hear the line in my head sitting at the table. Because as a kid, I hated lima beans. I couldn't stand them. I just. It was just in. Black Eyed peas could not. They were like actual eyeballs to me. I hated them. And I remember sitting there and they were getting cold. You know, when they get cold, they start to coagulate, so you really don't want to eat them. And my mom was like, you. She said, baby, you gonna eat them peas? And them peas gonna eat you, either one. And as a kid, I'm like, well, peas don't have mouths. But that's what she was saying. I don't give a fuck. You will eat them or they will eat you, but you're not getting up until they're gone. So.

[Turner Sparks]

And what about your friend? Like, if your friends came over, would your mom make your friends finish?

[Phil Duckett]

My friends was white. They didn't eat very well that often. So they always finished the food at my mom and my mama can cook. So they were like, Ms. Duckett, can I have more beans? And I was like, oh, fuck, they loved him.

[Turner Sparks]

I remember being like, two of us went over to this Latino kid's house and his mom, I finished my food, but the other kid was like, no, no, I only eat when I'm hungry. I've been told to only eat when I'm hungry. And she flipped out on him and made him finish all his food. And then he went back and, like, complained to his parents. And then the parents called the family and was like, when my child's at your house, you can't force feed them.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, we can solve that. Tell his bitch ass not to come to my house. Can't eat freeholds anyway, so.

[Turner Sparks]

Okay, that's conflicting advice there.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, it was going to be conflicting advice, because again, it's just join in if you, like, do it at your own discretion. I'm telling you, just growing up in them type of house, if they don't get back to him. If you want to test it out, test your cuss words out on white people.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm all, tee off.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, tee off. Just know there's a Time and a place, young boy. And do not take that back to your black household.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, all right, all right. Here's Cynthia from Raleigh, North Carolina. Oh, what up, CAC Written in. She says, my white boss, who I get along great with. I guess Cynthia's black. My white boss, who I get along with great, invited my husband and I over to his house for a Sunday barbecue. When we got there, we saw his kids playing with their dog and tongue kissing it on the mouth. Tongue kissing the dog on the mouth. She writes then, gross, but not my culture. So I ignored it. Later, right before the food was served, I was sitting on a chair outside, and the dog jumped on me and started licking me all over my face and mouth. With my boss, his wife, and kids around, I didn't want to cause problems, so I just sat there and ate the burger that they served me with full dog saliva on my face. Later, the dog kept trying to jump on me. How can I have. How could I have handled this so I could go wash my face but not offend my boss? And how could I have made sure that the dog didn't do it again? Okay, I think I have the answer. Please.

[Phil Duckett]

I hope you do.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. When you go over to a white family's house, because this is going to happen, white people tongue kiss their dog.

[Phil Duckett]

He's part of their family.

[Turner Sparks]

Fact of life.

[Phil Duckett]

Fact of life.

[Turner Sparks]

So you need to go preventative here. When you go to the house, you bring a Covid mask. And that way, if you see a dog and you see the kids tongue kissing, you put on the mask and you go, listen, I got Covid, and I got a tickle in my throat. I might have Covid. I'm not sure. So I just want to go full mask. Trust me, Even though it's 2024, white families will be okay with this. They love the COVID mask idea. They'll say, oh, yeah, by all means, put on the mask. And that way, if the dog jumps up on you, you got protection.

[Phil Duckett]

This is the worst advice.

[Turner Sparks]

This is the best advice.

[Phil Duckett]

How about you don't let the dog jump on you. You can say, down. You don't have to beat the dog. No, down, boy. You. You don't watch Caesar Chavarez the dog. Whisper. Whatever. You got to be the alpha. Now, clearly, the dog's running over at the white house. When I come in here, down people.

[Turner Sparks]

Are very white people very close to their dog.

[Phil Duckett]

Down treat. They. They don't care as long as you give them a treat.

[Turner Sparks]

But no, no, no. But that's not how a convers a conversation in a white house with a dog goes, hey, Charlie, what do you do? You're being bad. Meanwhile, he's just licking the face of the guest.

[Phil Duckett]

You know, even in the Bible you got a mask, you can turn the other cheek. You don't have to give them full tongue. You can turn your cheek.

[Turner Sparks]

That was before COVID mask came out.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm. I'm telling you, I've. I've seen that a dog's never licked me in my. Because I just, I don't allow it. So you do the down, I say the down. Or I just turn my head on my chill and the. And then the owner sees how uncomfortable I am and they're like, sparky, that's enough. Kettle up. But yeah, no, I've never just succumbed to the lick. Like. No, no. I actually saw an article about this because it was crazy, man. Because you know that this whole theory. Dog's mouths are cleaner than anything ever. That's, you know, that's what everyone said. The reason they don't mind is dogs mouths are cleaner than all humans mouths. Well, funny you should say that. There was a lady who was on vacation in Mexico, cut herself on one of her plastic room keys. It was a little nick, didn't think anything about it. Came home, her golden retriever was excited to see her, licked her arms, her face. She got all both arms and legs had to be amputated from a bacteria in the dog's mouth. She lost everything. You know what the crazy part about the whole story is? What this kept the dog. Imagine coming back from the hospital with no arms and legs. And the dog who took them is still eating your kibbles. Get the fuck out of here.

[Turner Sparks]

Okay. Where's this dog going to get. This isn't like a backyard dog.

[Phil Duckett]

We're going to the pound. I don't have arms or legs. Arms or legs, fam. You're out of here.

[Turner Sparks]

What do you do if you're at some like your in law's house and they have a dog?

[Phil Duckett]

My in laws do have dogs, right? Yeah, they put them up. I'm black. I'm not comfortable with damn dogs. Especially dogs. I don't know if I didn't know that dog as a puppy, as a ute. I can't have him around me. Okay. You know what I mean? And it's just. Any dogs because, you know, everybody's like, he's so friendly. He's never bitten anybody. Why the fuck does he have teeth then?

[Turner Sparks]

Can I agree? Why does okay. When I was growing up, every. Like, if someone on the block had a Rottweiler, you just knew to stay away from the Rottweiler. Now it's like, no, no, no. Mine's the good Rottweiler. Yeah, mine's fine. You just. Rottweilers, like Doberman pinschers. They're friendly animals. I'm like, then why is pinscher in the name of the animal?

[Phil Duckett]

Why are they guarding the junkyards? They do something. Anyway, so back to the story. Don't just have some boundaries. It's okay to have boundaries. Even with dogs. Even with your boss. Your boss ain't gonna fire you. Cause you didn't wanna get licked in the mouth by a dog.

[Turner Sparks]

Or bring a Covid mask.

[Phil Duckett]

Or bring your Covid mask in 90 degree weather in 2024 for a barbecue.

[Turner Sparks]

An outdoor barbecue, right?

[Phil Duckett]

People look at you crazy, man. I still look at people crazy when I see people wear Covet masks now in the city, I'm. I kind of weirds me out in 2024.

[Turner Sparks]

I saw a guy last night in the park alone, juggling and had a Covid mask on.

[Phil Duckett]

Alone. See what I'm saying?

[Turner Sparks]

Like, some people are mentally ill, I think, all right, here we go. Every time I'm a white guy living in New York City, every time I walk through Harlem, black folks make fun of me for my, in quotes, ratty old shoes. How can I remedy this without breaking the bank? This one's for Phil.

[Phil Duckett]

I mean, that's easy. Because, I mean, every shoe store has a clearance rack. We're not. We're not tripping about the brand of shoes. It's the condition of the shoes. You know, ever since white women made it cool to wear the dirtiest fucking Air Force ones they could find, y'all have really embraced that. And I'm. I mean. And like black people, we've. That's the one thing since the beginning of time, since I've been alive before then even black women, they'll tell you what's the first thing you look at when you look at a man? They're like, oh, it's feet. They go from the feet up. That's how they do it. So in our community, if your kicks are busted, you ain't got a shot. Because if you don't care about your appearance, you don't care about nothing. That's how we feel.

[Turner Sparks]

Why shoes, though? Like, why do black women start with the shoes and go up?

[Phil Duckett]

I'm not a black woman, so I can't speak for them, Turner. But I'M just telling you what they start at. The shoes. Your kicks gotta be clean. But even as a man, like, even now, when I take my shoes off, I get. I have a toothbrush, I shoot my. Put my laces in, and I brush my shoes before, you know, I mean, before I put them on again. Keep them crispy as long as you can, because that's just how we raise. It's a cultural thing. And then y'all started just getting the bummiest. I'm talking, like, the Air Force ones don't even have a logo on them anymore. And y'all put them with $1,000 outfit. And I guess that's called white privilege. I don't know. But we just ain't allowed that everything.

[Turner Sparks]

White privilege.

[Phil Duckett]

Yes.

[Turner Sparks]

Yes, it is. We've got to the heart of so wearing shoes that aren't nice show because.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. Think about it, like, I mean, from the beginning, black people, at least we were always. Your first impressions are everything.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

People judge you before you even open your mouth based on.

[Turner Sparks]

I agree. But that's like the.

[Phil Duckett]

But for black people, we always had to be pristine because we already get judged on so many different levels. We were already not accepted, so we had to look. That's, you know, where the word Sunday's best comes from? You know, when they. Oh, he was in his Sunday best. No, it comes from slavery. Back in the church, the slave owners used to have competitions on whose slaves would be the dress the nicest for church on Sunday. So it was known as Sunday's best. He would dress his slaves up to be the cleanest, and he like, my N S look better than your. And that's where Sunday's best came from. So we always say we have to look nice for on special occasions. And that's how it grew into this. So now, even still, it's all about first impressions, always about being fly. It's always about being pristine and clean, because that's how it was ingrained in us. And now it still is. So that's why we do it. White people have never. They could look however they want. They had think about the. The most. The richest white people, you know, dress like homeless people most of the time. You know what I mean?

[Turner Sparks]

True. But that's, like, modern. I feel like even up to the mid-90s, rich guys dressed in suits.

[Phil Duckett]

Trump's like, Bill Gates drives a Toyota Tacoma and wears Wrangler jeans.

[Turner Sparks]

But Trump's like the last holdover from that era.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, but I mean, and then it became.

[Turner Sparks]

No. Once like, went to Silicon Valley. Yeah, Bill Gates. Those white guys started being like, oh, it's a. I'm so rich, I can dress like. Yeah, like a dump.

[Phil Duckett]

But the thing is, you've always been able.

[Turner Sparks]

You still have to let me come in and like.

[Phil Duckett]

But you could always do what you want. You always do, you know? I mean, it was just kind of. What? It's just. Who's going to tell a white dude? You run the company. You can come into your office and. Jogging, bicycle shorts. Yeah, but it's just like one of those things y'all people do.

[Turner Sparks]

No, but it's. This is a shoes thing. People do wear suits, right?

[Phil Duckett]

People still and wear bummy shoes with the suits. Have you seen that? I've seen bummy sneakers. New balances with nice suits. Why people do that? We. If I'm wearing a suit with sneakers, the sneakers got to be brand new.

[Turner Sparks]

What's your opinion on flip flops?

[Phil Duckett]

I hate them. I hate the sound of the flop flop. The flop, flop, flop. I don't have any cares. That's what it sounds like. Yeah. I don't like it. I hate flip flops. The rainbows. Are those rainbow.

[Turner Sparks]

Are they? No, I can't afford rainbows. Those are expensive. These are reef.

[Phil Duckett]

I think rainbows are like 100 bucks.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, but it's lifetime. 100 bucks for flip flops.

[Phil Duckett]

I don't wear them, period.

[Turner Sparks]

Those flip flops are like 20 bucks. Really?

[Phil Duckett]

See, I don't know. I've never invested. What do you think of Crocs?

[Turner Sparks]

Very against Crocs.

[Phil Duckett]

See, growing up, we were alive when Crocs came out and used to get picked on. When they first came out, people were like, did you see those? Because, like, they were a joke.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

And now every celebrity, every kid, they swear Crocs. Like, even the slight, most famous.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm against Crocs, okay? So if you put in terms of Crocs. Now. I know what you're talking about. In terms of the dislike of flip flops. I didn't know till I moved to New York City that people. And it's not just black people, people in general, in city, people don't like.

[Phil Duckett]

Flip flops and wear flip flops. In New York City, Turner.

[Turner Sparks]

I wear them on the subway.

[Phil Duckett]

You don't give a fuck about nothing, Turner. You can't. There's too much dumpster and bum juice. And. And what about when it rains and it flops into the puddle and it's dookie water and shit on your heel? I have so many questions. Let me ask you and this is.

[Turner Sparks]

Are my feet gonna fall off?

[Phil Duckett]

This is what I want to know. Because you're white, do you wash your feet or do you just let the water run down? Like, a lot of y'all say, no.

[Turner Sparks]

No, no, I wash my feet.

[Phil Duckett]

Thank you.

[Turner Sparks]

Do people not wash their feet?

[Phil Duckett]

Taylor Swift says she don't wash her legs at all. And Travis Kelce said it. His brother said it. They're like. I mean, unless I, like, was running through mud. But if it's a regular day, the soap runs down your body, so that washes. And I said, this is why white people smell like Fritos. Because. Because this is ridiculous.

[Turner Sparks]

You know, so eat a lot of Fritos. Fritos are good. If you're. If you're going to go against Fritos, I'm going to cancel this shows. This is the end of the podcast right now. If you're going to come out against Fritos.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm just saying. When I heard that, I was taken aback.

[Turner Sparks]

Tortilla chips for people who are like, hey, these tortilla chips, we need more salt. There's not enough on these salted chips. There's not enough salt. Can we. And chop them down a little bit and triple the salt.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, my God.

[Turner Sparks]

Put them in a bag. Shake it up now.

[Phil Duckett]

We got freedom to hear that, though, so. Because if you wear flip flops, I feel like you have to soak your feet and wash in between them because you've touched too much.

[Turner Sparks]

I mean, I wash them when I shower, but when I lived in China, I did soak when I came home. My wife made me do that.

[Phil Duckett]

Why did you leave that practice over there?

[Turner Sparks]

Well, now I'm in America. That's the.

[Phil Duckett]

You mean to tell me that New York City is. Is cleaner than China? No way.

[Turner Sparks]

It is.

[Phil Duckett]

That's terrifying.

[Turner Sparks]

I mean, actually, it's not. Wait, no, no, no. Let me say this, because I know China's going to go nuts. It's not today, but it was. China's gotten a lot cleaner over the last, like, five to ten years.

[Phil Duckett]

Really?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

What happened? New regime?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, you could say that. Uh.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm gonna go easy on that.

[Turner Sparks]

I don't. I want to be able to go back to that country.

[Phil Duckett]

Gotcha.

[Turner Sparks]

Let's just say there's a new man in charge who won't leave.

[Phil Duckett]

That is terrifying. Who won't leave.

[Turner Sparks]

And part of his way of. And one of the things he's done is say, at this country, we got to clean that. He's just taking, like, a Fire hose to the whole place.

[Phil Duckett]

What are we chopping fingers off for? Littering or whatever?

[Turner Sparks]

There's this. I mean, you want to get into it?

[Phil Duckett]

I would love to know.

[Turner Sparks]

Social credit score. Have you heard of that?

[Phil Duckett]

That's like that Black Mirror episode. So if you get caught littering, they lower your. So you can't have friends.

[Turner Sparks]

So you can't. So, you know, we all have credit scores.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

You can't buy a house or whatever it is. You can't get a loan if there's truth. But that's if you default on. If something's wrong with your money. Right. But there they have what's called a social credit score. And that just means, like, if you go out into the street one day and you're wearing, like, stripes with plaids, boom, down, like, you can't get on the train the next day because people are like that.

[Phil Duckett]

Is that an example or is that something for real?

[Turner Sparks]

I mean, that's exaggerated, but there are. There are. It is simple. Like if you are yelling at somebody in the street super loud, and it wakes Everybody up at 2am Then the next day you go to buy a train ticket to get to the next city, and you'll just be like, no, your score is too low because somebody reported you.

[Phil Duckett]

How do you get it back up? Or you just stuck in the city now.

[Turner Sparks]

You got to just go kiss ass around the neighborhood for a while.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, my God.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, you're stuck in the city or you got to go buy a car. And then, because it's all social things, social faux pas that you did wrong, one of them's littering. There's yelling like noise pollution, street pollution, all kinds of stuff. I'm telling you, he put it in, like, five years ago. I hadn't been there in five years. I went back a month and a half ago. It worked. It's a very clean country now. Very quiet. I bet people are very obedient.

[Phil Duckett]

Tell me that if I litter, I can't leave my city. I'm gonna do everything by the.

[Turner Sparks]

Much more polite. Yeah, there's party that goes. There's something to that.

[Phil Duckett]

There's something to it. Well, yeah, good luck.

[Turner Sparks]

Like when I'm woken up at 3am by someone screaming in the street.

[Phil Duckett]

I won. The crackheads yelling at the ceiling.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm like, I'd be. I'd love to lower their score.

[Phil Duckett]

Lower his score right now.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, last question. This comes from Gus in Florida, Phil. He wants to know why do black guys get so excited for magic tricks?

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, shit. I Can tell you it's not excitement really, it's more fear. That's what it is.

[Turner Sparks]

So you know what I have in my head when he asked this? What I have in my head is that David Blaine doing magic for the Dallas Cowboys. Remember that? In the 90s?

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

I think that was the first time any of us saw that like street magic thing.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

And Emmett Smith and Michael Irvin, he was in their locker room and he finished some trick and they literally just ran away.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

And I don't even know. They ran like yard. Hundreds of yards every.

[Phil Duckett]

Well, every time our minds won't we start running. That's what we do. I run too. Like.

[Turner Sparks]

No, because of magic.

[Phil Duckett]

Because of anything. If something's really funny, think about when black people die laughing. We take off running.

[Turner Sparks]

Take off.

[Phil Duckett]

I start sprinting when it's really funny. I can't. It's what we do. It's funny as we fall. Yeah, yeah. I fall in. I run the same thing with magic, but it's not. It's exciting. But it's mostly fear. A lot of us, a lot of black folks were raised in religious like just kind of growing up just your roots are in church. Even people who don't go now your grandmother.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Even like the hood as dudes. You met their grandma influenced by this. Every day they're every Sunday they're in church. And God and what's demonic and what like a lot of us even we like horror movies. We ain't watching the Exorcist and all that. That's demonic. And we quick to call something my. Like that ain't nothing but the devil magic. Like that is crazy. But it's so in such a different realm and we. There's no way to explain it. So we like Nah, that's the devil right there, dog. You know, I mean because I've been to those shows where like a mentalist was like matter of fact. Matt Richards comedian, one of the best magicians I've ever. Well, he's actually a mental. Mentalist. It is phenomenal. He went on, he came over one time and we were.

[Turner Sparks]

Wait, does he do that at like on stage? He does.

[Phil Duckett]

He does a magic. He does a magic show.

[Turner Sparks]

I think I had to follow him doing magic one night.

[Phil Duckett]

It is unreal how good he is. And literally.

[Turner Sparks]

And then what are you supposed to do next?

[Phil Duckett]

But that's. I don't know. But I'm telling you, I wouldn't follow that.

[Turner Sparks]

It was awful. I bombed so hard.

[Phil Duckett]

Cuz it's. You're just mind blown. It's like, this guy's the real. But anyway, he was like, literally when he walked in, he was like, take the sticky note. He's like, write down anything. Think of something. Anything. I don't care what topic, anything you want. Write it down and fold up. He said, at the end of this, I'll tell you what it is, and when I shit you not, he said. He's like, are you ready for that word? I'm like, he said, wait, you just.

[Turner Sparks]

Wrote down a word?

[Phil Duckett]

I wrote down a name. He said, it could be a word, a person, place, thing, anything.

[Turner Sparks]

Before you tell us, let's mention that he's black.

[Phil Duckett]

Matt Richards is a black magician.

[Turner Sparks]

Yes.

[Phil Duckett]

Right, right, right.

[Turner Sparks]

I've never seen that before.

[Phil Duckett]

You don't see him very often, I tell you that. It's like Haley's comment. So he literally. He was, like, ready for it. And I wrote down JLo at the beginning, and we had not talked about Jennifer Lopez.

[Turner Sparks]

Can I ask you a question?

[Phil Duckett]

Sure.

[Turner Sparks]

Did he then. You wrote it down? Did he then ask you a series of questions?

[Phil Duckett]

No, he was just talking, and he was like. He said, are you ready for the work? He'd asked me questions about other things, but nothing pertaining to what I wrote down. We were just having a podcast, like, just talking.

[Turner Sparks]

Who's on a podcast?

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. And we were just talking.

[Turner Sparks]

Okay.

[Phil Duckett]

And then he was all right. He's like, so, you ready? And then he was like. And he looked at me and he was like, it's a musician. And as I was like, yeah. He said, jennifer Lopez. And I said, get the fuck out. I literally just ran out. I was like. Because I literally wrote it down, and it would have been, like, 45 minutes. I put it in my pocket. I didn't show anybody. That's. And it was just like, I don't know, man. It made my head explode. I was like, how do you do that? He was like, I've been doing magic since I was three years old. And I was like. But still. He was like, I'm a mentalist, so there's certain things that you do. I said, there's nothing that I did today that would make you think Jennifer Lopez was on my mind.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, he was.

[Phil Duckett]

I just. I've been doing it forever. He does it at the Comedy Cellar all the time. He has a magic show. But, yeah, it's impressive, but we know. But it makes you run, because this has to be different.

[Turner Sparks]

Spirits. It's the work of the devil.

[Phil Duckett]

This is the work of the devil. But this is the Salem Witch Trials, and I'm gonna burn all you motherfuckers.

[Turner Sparks]

But also, we all know that magic's not real, right?

[Phil Duckett]

That's what y'all say, but this wasn't magic. This was mental. He was in my fucking mind.

[Turner Sparks]

But even he told you there's some type of a.

[Phil Duckett]

Something you gotta be in my head. There's. I don't. What. What do you think? I was out here dancing to J. Like, I wasn't like, you know, I was on Yo. MTV Raps. Nothing. I. It was just a thought that came to my head, a name. And I was like, oh, he'll never get this. So random.

[Turner Sparks]

All right.

[Phil Duckett]

I don't know. Black people in magic, we are, yeah, highly volatile. We. It freaks us out, but it makes us run because we, like, nah, that's crazy. But now it's a different type of excitement. It's more fear.

[Turner Sparks]

I used to do magic for, like, 15 years. They tell you that? No.

[Phil Duckett]

And seeing someone.

[Turner Sparks]

Before I was a magician, I've had black people run away from me.

[Phil Duckett]

It's scary, Joe. It really is. It's like, yeah, it's an unknown force. It's the dark arts.

[Turner Sparks]

I get that. I don't understand it. Also, can I ask you this? Why when black people think something's funny that, like, will repeat it? Like, you say something funny, and then the response will be, he said. And then just say the same thing. And then the he said guy usually gets as big of a laugh as the original guy. And I'm like, why is he getting credit? He didn't do anything. He just said. He said. And then, like, you could be like, why the chicken crossroad? To get to the other side. And the guy would be like, he said. He said to get to the other side. And then they'll start. Everyone will be like, yeah, he did.

[Phil Duckett]

Send the steal process.

[Turner Sparks]

And I'm like, he's stealing your joke right in front of you. He's doing your bit.

[Phil Duckett]

We don't take it to your face. Doing your bit is like, if that.

[Turner Sparks]

Was me, I would be like, yeah, that was. I did say that. We all know I just said that. Of course I said that. That was my line.

[Phil Duckett]

But it was the reassurance that did you hear. Because sometimes it takes a second to process. So with them saying it, it's like, that's exactly okay. I thought I was tripping. No, they just.

[Turner Sparks]

I would be furious. I would be like, this is my material. What do you think? I just. This, like, I have this to give away. We have a finite amount.

[Phil Duckett]

I can't wait to do a. He said with him real quick.

[Turner Sparks]

You do not. He said me. I dare you to. He said me.

[Phil Duckett]

I can't wait to do that. This fool Turner just said, I don't mind if you.

[Turner Sparks]

He said me. But then, if ever. But then if that gets a pop.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm going to stand an ovation.

[Turner Sparks]

If you do that on stage, we do this live and you do that on stage and everyone then laughs bigger. You. I'm like, that was my joke.

[Phil Duckett]

You got to walk off.

[Turner Sparks]

At least steal it behind my back.

[Phil Duckett]

He's like, I can't work like this. Oh, man.

[Turner Sparks]

Steal it when I'm not in the room. No, that's just right in front of me. All right, that's the show.

[Phil Duckett]

I had a blast today, buddy.

[Turner Sparks]

Black and white advice, everybody write into us. We now have a G. We have a email address blackandwhiteadvicepodmail.com. any questions you have for me, for Phil, anything, write us in. We'll do it soon on the show. That's it.

[Phil Duckett]

You've got a question but you're scared to ask? Just drop the boys a message?

[Turner Sparks]

Cause they're up to the task?

[Phil Duckett]

They're all in the dice? They ain't always nice? But you can't think twice when giving? Black and white and black, black and white.

[C]

Got something on your mind you need to talk about? Forget texting. Just call up a friend so you can hear a voice. It might be old school, but it helps. This healthy suggestion is brought to you by Regents Blue Cross Blue Shield of Oregon. Together we help.

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How do you feel when you switch to GEICO and save on your car insurance? It's like going to work on one Thursday morning and thinking to yourself, just one more day until Friday. But then somebody in the elevator says, happy Fri. Yay. Then you check your phone quickly and discover today is actually Friday. So, yes, Happy Friday, random stranger in the elevator. Happy Friday indeed. Yep. Switching and saving with GEICO feels just like that. Get more with Geico.