Black and White Advice: Episode Summary – "Why Do White People Love the Royal Family?"

Released on November 12, 2024

Hosts: Turner Sparks and Phil Duckett
Podcast: Black and White Advice
Description: Comedians Turner Sparks (white) and Phil Duckett (black) answer all your questions on race, even the scary ones. Have a question? Email us at BlackandWhiteAdvicePod@Gmail.com and prepare to be educated.

Introduction

In this episode titled "Why Do White People Love the Royal Family?", hosts Turner Sparks and Phil Duckett dive into a mix of humor and insightful discussions surrounding race, societal perceptions, and cultural phenomena. The episode features interactive segments, audience questions, and the introduction of new segments aimed at fostering dialogue across racial lines.

Segment 1: Name the Criminal

Timestamp: [00:52] - [09:48]

The episode kicks off with a lively game called "Name the Criminal", introduced by guest Joe Russell. The premise involves presenting crime stories sourced from the New York Post, challenging Turner and Phil to determine the race and gender of the perpetrators based solely on the scant details provided.

Notable Interaction:

• Joe Russell: "Halloween mask wearing duo nabbed for stealing 8k in Magic the Gathering cards from a comic book store."
• Phil Duckett: Guesses "white male" but through humorous banter, they conclude it's actually two black males.
  [03:39] Phil Duckett: "I'll see you in Rikers."

The segment highlights the hosts' playful yet incisive examination of racial stereotypes and assumptions in criminal profiling.

Segment 2: Main Discussion – Why White People Love the Royal Family

Timestamp: [11:27] - [19:18]

The core of the episode addresses the titular question submitted by Jordan in Chicago: "Why do white people love the royal family?"

Key Points Discussed:

1. Colonial Nostalgia:

   • Turner Sparks: "Simply fans of colonizing."
   • The hosts humorously critique the romanticization of colonial history, suggesting that white admiration for the royal family stems from a subconscious appreciation of colonial power dynamics.

2. Disney-like Aspirations:

   • Turner Sparks: "Women want to be princesses. This is the Disney culture of it all."
   • They draw parallels between the fairy-tale allure of royalty and Disney's influence on aspirations, particularly among white women.

3. Meghan Markle's Impact:

   • Phil Duckett: "All these white women who dreamed of being a princess one day see Meghan come in, strutting that little melanin she got, and they're like, this black bitch stole my dream."
   • The discussion delves into Meghan Markle's integration into the royal family and the racial tensions it may have sparked within its traditional fanbase.

4. Historical References:

   • Turner Sparks: "They slaughtered. Local people... built a couple houses... now it's like a boutique hotel."
   • The hosts critique the commercialization and cultural erasure resulting from colonialism, masked by the romantic narrative often propagated by admirers.

Humorous and Edgy Remarks:

• Phil Duckett: "They let them work in, but they could never afford to stay there."
• Turner Sparks: "They control this shit."

The conversation oscillates between sharp social commentary and irreverent humor, maintaining a balance that provokes thought while entertaining listeners.

Segment 3: Audience Questions

Timestamp: [19:21] - [37:14]

Following the main discussion, the hosts address additional questions from their audience, maintaining the show's interactive format.

1. Question from James in Florida: "I'm going to my first black wedding. What is a proper amount of money to spend on the gift?"

   • Phil Duckett: Advises adhering to wedding registries and personal financial comfort.
   • Turner Sparks: Suggests a range of "$50 to $100," emphasizing the importance of knowing the couple rather than adhering to strict amounts.

2. Question from Keith in Brooklyn: "I'm a white person who lives in Bed Stuy, Brooklyn, and I'm constantly aware that the locals view me as a gentrifier and that I don't belong. What can I do?"

   • Phil Duckett: Suggests "Go back to where you came from," initiating a candid conversation on gentrification.
   • Discussion Points:
     • Definition and Impact: Gentrification is dissected as both a potential revitalization and a form of cultural displacement.
     • Community Integration: Emphasis on contributing positively to the neighborhood while respecting its history and residents.
     • Cultural Preservation: The negative aspects of gentrification include erasing local culture and history, leading to tensions between long-term residents and newcomers.

3. Question from Jack in Buffalo: "Why do black people only smoke menthols?"

   • Phil Duckett: Attributes the preference to the "cool sensation" and richer flavor, albeit humorously admitting uncertainty.
   • Turner Sparks: Shares a personal anecdote about never having smoked, leading to a humorous back-and-forth about childhood experiences with smoking.

Notable Quotes:

• Phil Duckett: "Black people, we don't know the name of. We just... we call you."
• Turner Sparks: "It's like orange juice with pulp."

These interactions showcase the hosts' ability to blend humor with genuine inquiries, fostering an environment where sensitive topics are navigated with wit and insight.

Segment 4: Hate Mail

Timestamp: [30:24] - [33:04]

Introducing a new segment, "Hate Mail," Turner and Phil confront derogatory messages from listeners head-on, using humor to diffuse negativity and encourage open dialogue.

Featured Hate Mail:

• From Vinnie in Carlisle, England:
  "All you guys, all right? I'm not going to do the exit. Are you guys just an ugly version of Colin Jost and Michael Che?"
• Hosts' Response:
  Phil Duckett: "I never thought I'm gonna answer yes. Yeah... That's not hate mail."
  Turner Sparks: Engages with humor, acknowledging the insult while maintaining composure.

This segment underscores the podcast's commitment to addressing and dismantling racist attitudes through candid conversation and comedic relief.

Promotions and Closing

Timestamp: [33:14] - [37:52]

The episode concludes with promotions and announcements:

1. Phil Duckett’s Comedy Special – "Gentrification":

   • Release Date: October 25
   • Details: Available on all major platforms like YouTube, Sirius XM, iTunes, and Spotify.
   • Humorous Note:
     Turner Sparks: "You do, they named it after my middle name, Gentry."

2. Patreon Subscription:

   • Encourages listeners to subscribe for bonus content and early access to episodes.
   • Phil Duckett: Teases exclusive content and personal interactions for subscribers.

3. Final Remarks:

   • Phil Duckett: "Stay black, America."
   • Turner Sparks: Reiterates the show's mission to answer questions and promote understanding across racial lines.

Conclusion

In "Why Do White People Love the Royal Family?", Turner Sparks and Phil Duckett adeptly navigate through humor, personal anecdotes, and sharp social commentary to explore complex racial dynamics and cultural fascinations. The episode not only entertains but also educates listeners, encouraging thoughtful reflection on topics such as gentrification, cultural appropriation, and racial stereotypes. Through interactive segments and candid discussions, the hosts reinforce the podcast’s mission to bridge understanding between black and white communities.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Phil Duckett [03:39]: "I'll see you in Rikers."
• Turner Sparks [11:51]: "Loved colonization."
• Phil Duckett [17:00]: "Black people. You think we give a damn about what rich white folks are doing with their marriages?"
• Turner Sparks [21:15]: "What's up, everybody?"
• Turner Sparks [31:22]: "Send it to your kids school."
• Phil Duckett [35:09]: "Just laying up inside a Tarzan looking woman."

These quotes encapsulate the show's blend of humor and critical insights, reflecting the hosts' unique perspectives on race and society.