Take OFF The Knee Brace

Summary

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Bloodline Banter: "Take OFF The Knee Brace"

Podcast by 2M Media Group — Released May 21, 2026

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Main Theme / Purpose

This lively episode of Bloodline Banter, hosted by Riley and Landon, is a classic slice-of-life conversation blending Southern humor, nostalgic storytelling, sharp observations on modern manners, and candid opinions on everything from gym habits to rooting for Kentucky Derby horses. True to the podcast's title, the hosts riff on family dynamics, regional quirks, and pop culture, all with their trademark banter and warmth. The episode also features their popular "Cousin Council" advice segment, engaging with real listener dilemmas with unfiltered, often hilarious, honesty.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Sleep, Health & Prayers

• Sleep Scores and Routines: The hosts discuss their nightly routines and sleep scores, with Riley joking about his high score and attributing it to "prayin’ before bed."

  “Sometimes I pray, and I forget I’m praying and I just be talking to Jesus like he's my homie. And I’ll be like, ‘You’re quiet today, Lord, I hate — why you so quiet today?’” – Riley [01:27]

• Praying Before Bed: Landon admits to sometimes falling asleep mid-prayer, showcasing their candid honesty about faith and daily routines.

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2. Soda Debates & Food Memories

• Cherry Coke vs. Cheerwine: The duo discuss their soda preferences, with Cherry Coke taking top spot and root beer facing their comedic wrath.

  “Root beer is like someone one day was changing the oil in their car and they got real thirsty and they took a drink out of it, and they said, you know, we could sell that in a bottle.” – Riley [03:47]

• Root Beer Origins: A brief educational detour debunks the mystery of root beer’s name, revealing its sassafras roots.

  “It tastes like sassa ass is what it tastes like.” – Riley [04:55]

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3. Driving Stories & Southern Pet Peeves

• Courtesy & Road Rage: Riley vents about people not saying ‘thank you’ when he opens doors and about drivers who hesitate at green lights.

  “If I hold the door open for you and you don’t say thank you, I want to grab you by the head of your hair, drag you back through that door and lock the damn thing.” – Riley [05:13]

• Can-Am Crash Tales: The hosts share a harrowing (but humorous) tale of crashing a Can-Am at 65 mph on their childhood farm while racing against horses.

  “We hit that bitch going 65 miles an hour...Thank God. Were you in your seatbelt?” – Landon & Riley [08:37]

• ADHD Medication & Weight: Riley recalls taking dextroamphetamine as a kid, laughing about the dramatic weight loss and ensuing family cover-ups about the crash speed.

  “If I could get my hands on that shit right now, I’d look like a piece of paper blowing through the wind.” – Riley [09:06]

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4. Hometown Nostalgia & Country Life

• St. Jude Rodeo & Small-Town Events: The hosts reminisce about growing up in Ringgold, GA, with annual rodeos and barrel races, and highlight the simple joys of boiled peanuts and fried Oreos.

• Modern Country Living Wishes: Landon details his dream for a luxurious horse farm — but bounces between that and a sleek “Kim Kardashian” house or a lake house.

  “I want a really nice horse barn and a really nice house and it all be paved together in like a little pond with sprinkler sprinklers coming out...so you want a Heartland farm?” – [15:10–15:22]

• Rodeo Ethics & Anxieties: Discussion of rodeo events touches on discomfort with animal treatment and a healthy dose of self-deprecating "yuppie" banter.

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5. Health, Fitness, & Running Ambitions

• Gym Struggles & Flat Feet: Landon talks about starting a health journey but admits he rarely goes to the gym, while Riley expresses a ‘genuine’ desire to start running, despite past excuses about flat feet.

  “I want to be like one of them runners like on TikTok...I want to look good when I do it and I want to run.” – Riley [19:48]

• Medical Memories: Riley recounts using a golf cart in high school golf due to his weight and flat feet, sparking more family fun-poking about inherited metabolisms.

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6. Social Media and Embarrassment

• Modern Shame (or Lack Thereof): The hosts critique people for oversharing on the internet, especially folks who keep wearing hospital bands post-visit or, notably, those infamous "knee brace forever" kids.

  “The Internet has destroyed embarrassment. People have no shame to film their stuff crying and posting it.” – Riley [27:10]
  “They tore their ACL in, like, maybe the sixth grade or something. And I kid you not, they wore that brace until senior year…” – Landon [28:14]

• Influencer Couples & Fake Pranks: Both hosts rail against overly staged or performative couples content online.

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7. Quickfire: Bloodline Brain Check

• Fun Fact Trivia: They quiz each other with general questions:

  • What does WWW stand for?
  • Hottest planet (Venus, not Mercury)
  • Universal blood donor (O negative)
  • Netflix’s original DVD-by-mail model
  • Q in Q-tip stands for “Quality”

• Tongue-in-Cheek Responses:

  “Weight Watchers Worldwide. I don’t know. What is it?” – Riley [34:22]
  “How is Venus hotter than the one that’s closer to the sun?” – Riley [35:36]

• Personal Anecdotes: Organ donation views, memories of Blockbuster and Redbox, and whether climate or food is more important in daily life.

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8. Cousin Council Advice Segment (43:00–50:00)

Situation 1: Teacher Drama

• Listener’s math teacher holds a grudge due to past family drama; should the listener speak up or ignore it?

  “If I hold the door open for you and you don’t say thank you, I want to...drag you back through that door and lock the damn thing.” – Riley [05:13]

  • Riley: “I’d go to the principal. Teacher needs to drop her problems at the door when she goes in to teach.” [44:14]

Situation 2: Boyfriend’s “Gay Girl Best Friend”

• Listener worried her boyfriend’s “gay best friend” may not be so gay after all; lots of time spent together, ambiguous signals.
  • Hosts agree: Conversation needed, boundaries clarified, and more honest communication.

  “I think you need to sit him down and her down and be like, ‘Look, I don’t know if you’re really a lesbian, but you ain’t get my boyfriend.’” – Riley [46:31]

Situation 3: Moving from Kansas to North Carolina

• Listener nervous about relocating due to spouse’s military orders.
  • Both hosts encourage trying new places; you’ll adapt, make new friends, and expand your worldview.

  “There’s nothing better than just getting out of the place you were raised because your mindset opens up a lot.” – Riley [49:17]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “If you can’t quit bitching about the way I drive, get out and walk. No, I, I.” – Riley [06:58]
• “Root beer is like someone one day was changing the oil in their car and they got real thirsty and they took a drink out of it, and they said, you know, we could sell that in a bottle.” – [03:47]
• “I want my house to be about 10,000 square foot and I want everybody to come over.” – Landon [15:31]
• “The Internet has destroyed embarrassment.” – Riley [27:10]
• “They tore their ACL in like maybe the sixth grade ...they wore that brace until senior year of high school.” – Landon [28:14]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Sleep/Faith Routine: [00:59–01:27]
• Soda Chat & Root Beer Roast: [02:44–04:55]
• Pet Peeves & Driving: [05:13–06:41]
• Can-Am Crash Memory: [07:34–09:55]
• Childhood & Rodeo Nostalgia: [10:36–13:12]
• Modern Country Life Dreaming: [13:27–16:01]
• Gym, Flat Feet, & Golf Cart Accommodations: [19:48–21:12]
• Social Media & Knee Brace Bit: [27:10–28:14]
• Bloodline Brain Check (Trivia): [34:12–42:10]
• Cousin Council (Advice Segment): [43:00–50:00]
  • Teacher Drama: [43:13–44:36]
  • Boyfriend/Girl Best Friend Situation: [44:49–47:41]
  • Moving to North Carolina: [47:43–49:42]

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Tone and Style

The conversation is sharp, playful, and unfiltered — peppered with Southern authenticity, friendly ribbing, and bursts of raucous laughter. The duo’s chemistry elevates even mundane topics (sleep scores, car rides, soda, family stories) into smart, witty commentary. Their “Cousin Council” maintains this humor, yet manages to offer genuinely helpful advice.

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TL;DR

"Take OFF The Knee Brace" is a hilarious and heartfelt romp through Southern quirks, family stories, pet peeves, and honest opinions on social media oversharing, interwoven with live listener advice. Riley and Landon’s dynamic shines brightest in their unscripted, sometimes chaotic “banter,” serving up equal parts comedy, nostalgia, and no-nonsense counsel for their cousin-like audience.

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Transcript

[A]

Hello, everybody. Welcome back to Bloodline Banter. I'm Riley.

[B]

And I'm Landon.

[A]

You know, every time we say that, all I can think about is I

[B]

keep wanting to say, I'm Riley.

[A]

Well, you're not. Every time we say that, all I can think about is, and we got a good one for you today, folks, on this side, because I'm on Family Feud.

[B]

They don't say, though my name is.

[A]

My name is Steve Harvey. And we got a good one for you today, folks. On this side. We got the Rap family from New Mexico. We got the Rap Family, and we got the Jones family. Give me Carl. Give me Matt.

[B]

Would you ever do that?

[A]

Hell, yeah. I'd go, yes.

[B]

Would you ever go on Family Feud, Kirsten?

[A]

Okay, I would love to go on Family Feud.

[B]

But anyways, do they even do that anymore still?

[A]

Yeah, they film in Atlanta.

[B]

Oh, I thought they just.

[A]

I thought.

[B]

I kept watching reruns over and over and over and over and over again. Anyways, into regular scheduled programming. It's weird to ask how you slept last night because it's 3:30 right now. During the day. Yeah, we're not recording early in the morning, so we're. But how did you sleep last night?

[A]

I slept great. My sleep score was a 91.

[B]

You got a crown?

[A]

I did.

[B]

Mine was a 69.

[A]

Yesterday it was 93.

[B]

What's going on?

[A]

Jesus, I pray before bed.

[B]

You don't have to be worried.

[A]

Rejuvenated and washed in the blood.

[B]

Amen. I hope you do that every day.

[A]

I do.

[B]

That's probably. Don't. You probably just started doing.

[A]

Listen, I'll be honest. I do forget to pray sometimes, but it's not because I don't.

[B]

I was praying the other night and I fell asleep.

[A]

Sometimes I pray.

[B]

That ever happen to you? You ever pray? A little.

[A]

Sometimes I pray and I forget I'm praying and I just be talking to Jesus like he's my homie. And I'll be like, you're quiet today. And Lord, I hate.

[B]

Why are you so quiet today?

[A]

I don't know. I just took my medicine for the first time in two days. Yeah, well, I haven't taken it the past two days because I keep forgetting. But I took it about an hour ago. And I will say I'm a little bit loopy. So if I look a little drunk, I'm not.

[B]

Yeah, your eyes do look glossy. Yeah, I didn't know it done that to you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Anyways, I'm drinking a Coke right now. This is so funny. I'm Hitting the gym today.

[A]

Did you go this morning?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay. I wasn't. That's a lot. I knew it was. You'd have told me if you went.

[B]

I am going this afternoon, though. I am for real.

[A]

I'm dating, right?

[B]

All day. I woke up this morning, my three eggs, three extra egg whites in it, sourdough piece of sourdough toast and grapefruit. And then for lunch, I drank a core protein powder shake on the way here, and a fly flew in it. And then it got thrown away. And then Kirsten, I was like. She came to my apartment. She said, do you want to. I said, do you want a Dr. Pepper? I have Dr. Pepper. She said, no, I'm not drinking any sodas anymore. No more sodas. And I was like, well, I'm on my health journey starting today, and I'm drinking a Coke and I had a protein shake. And it's about healthy balance, you know?

[A]

Look right here. Zero calories.

[B]

I don't mess with the Diet Coke, but I will say this Cherry Coke has me by the throat. One a day is not going to hurt, right?

[A]

That's a mini one. You could probably have two of them.

[B]

Yeah. Somebody tried to get me to try Cheer wine the other day. And from the cookout.

[A]

Cheer one's good. Yes, it is. No, Cheer one floats from cookout. No, no, no, no, no.

[B]

But it's not comparable to a Cherry Coke.

[A]

It is non comparable. Cheerwine is like. It's like, from North Carolina. It's like a North Carolina staple, I think. And it's just like Cherry Coke.

[B]

I don't. I don't mess with the Cheerwine.

[A]

I didn't think it was that bad when I tried it, but I also had it in a float with ice cream. So, you know, you can't beat, like, a Coke float.

[B]

I don't fuck with a float. The only float I'm messing with is a pool float.

[A]

No, I don't like a. I don't like a float.

[B]

Especially not a root beer float.

[A]

I don't like root beer. Don't come anywhere near me. If you bring me root beer, I

[B]

will cut you up one side, down the other, and tell you how bad your grandpappy looks.

[A]

Root beer is like someone one day was changing the oil in their car and they got real thirsty and they took a drink out of it, and they said, you know, we could sell that in a bottle.

[B]

And they did with a little bit

[A]

of carbonation, and that's what they did and call it root beer. And that's what they did.

[B]

And it tastes like. What's, like the base of root beer?

[A]

I about said that's how bad it is. I don't even. That only make no sense, but. Yeah.

[B]

I wonder why it's called that. Is it like the root of something? We looked that up for us. Why root beer is called root beer, I don't know. In the meantime.

[A]

In the meantime, I meant to tell you this.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

The other day.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

If I am walking somewhere and I am whole. If I hold the door open for you. Huh?

[B]

Oh, we gotta. We've got a hold up.

[A]

Root beer on.

[B]

Root beer.

[A]

It is originally brewed from the root

[B]

of a sass frass plant and herbs.

[A]

So it's a frothy, fermented beer, like, beverage.

[B]

It's.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It's literally from the roots of a sassafras.

[A]

Sassafras plant. It's from the root of a sassafras plant. And it tastes like sassa ass.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Tastes like sassa ass is what it tastes like. Anyway, okay.

[B]

Thank you for that.

[A]

If I hold the door open for you. Okay, this rem. I'm not talking about you. Are you good?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Let it out.

[B]

I know you ain't talking about me.

[A]

Excuse me. I'm sorry.

[B]

So excuse our behavior.

[A]

That really just.

[B]

Anyways, keep going.

[A]

DeBarpy was contagious. Like a sneeze. Anyways, I was holding the door before a woman this morning held the door open for her. She walked out, never looked at me. Never said thank you, never said you, never said kiss my ass. If I hold the door open for you and you don't say thank you, I want to grab you by the head of your hair, drag you back through that door and lock the damn thing. Because I didn't have to do that.

[B]

No, I didn't have to hold that door. You were being courteous and kind.

[A]

When people won't let me over in traffic, makes me want to wreck into the side of their vehicle.

[B]

You know what my biggest ordeal is right now?

[A]

What?

[B]

I was in the passenger side seat of my friend's vehicle the other day, and the lot turned green.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

Just sat there.

[A]

Y' all don't understand. How big of a lot turns green.

[B]

You go immediately.

[A]

Y' all don't understand.

[B]

You go immediately.

[A]

How big of a deal that is. Because Lanena doesn't drive, Lanen doesn't ride. He drives.

[B]

I drive everywhere. But I decided to be the passenger in this go around, and I'm telling you, that lot turned green and we sat there for five Minutes I went. Go.

[A]

I will say.

[B]

And then you get bitched out for being a backseat driver.

[A]

I've done that to you before and you've bitched at me. I.

[B]

You've not. Not for being. Not for stopping at a green light.

[A]

I didn't say stopping at a green

[B]

line or not going quick enough at a green light. Because as soon as that turns green, I put the pedal to the metal.

[A]

Listen, as soon as that turns green. Vin. Now don't.

[B]

Don't.

[A]

Comes out in me. And I'll be smoking them damn tires.

[B]

Okay, Don't. I don't care about backseat driving any other time.

[A]

I do.

[B]

You. You. I don't.

[A]

I can't stand whenever I'm driving in the car with somebody and we'll be going on the road and then all of a sudden they go grabbing the door.

[B]

I don't care about that because I know I drive psychotic.

[A]

Like, if you can't quit bitching about the way I drive, get out and walk. No, I, I.

[B]

There needs to be at least seven more oh. Handles in my car. I drive like I came straight out of NASCAR Speedway, you know, And I

[A]

can confirm that because one time Landon and I were.

[B]

You are zoned out today. I feel like looking at you right now. Your body is on that. Your spirit is on the outside of your body. Just looking at you.

[A]

I feel great.

[B]

You look higher than hell.

[A]

I'm not higher than hell.

[B]

Did you.

[A]

Did I what?

[B]

Do something before?

[A]

No, I'm not.

[B]

Finish your. What you were saying.

[A]

I can confirm Landon drives like a bat out of hell and that he's been driving since. Like that. Since before he ever even had his license. Because one time we were on the farm. We grew up on a 300 acre farm. I don't think we've ever told this story before. And we are riding the Can Am on.

[B]

And for those of you that don't know what a can Can Am is just like a side beside Polaris, whatever. What do you call those?

[A]

No, no, no, no. Kirsten calls them a buggy.

[B]

No. Oh, we can go ride buggies.

[A]

We don't call him a buggy.

[B]

I also don't call him an atv.

[A]

We call him a side beside.

[B]

Okay, okay.

[A]

Multiple names anyways.

[B]

And that thing would go about in

[A]

about 2ft of grass. And we're booking at about 65 miles an hour. And all of a sudden we come to a screeching halt. And it wasn't a halt as in press the brake. It was like we hit. Like that. We hit a Tree.

[B]

But it wasn't a tree. It was a tree stump somebody had

[A]

cut off and not grinded to the damn ground.

[B]

Ground. And that was the only stump left in the whole damn thing.

[A]

In the whole field. We hit that bitch going 65 miles an hour.

[B]

Thank God. Were you in your seatbelt?

[A]

I don't think I was, no.

[B]

Because you hit that bar.

[A]

I was holding onto breath out of you, and I went like that. Oh, I just hit the mic. I just went like that. And it hit me in my chest. And this was before I was thick with three Cs. I was just skin and bones. Cause I was taking ADHD medication, which later got black recalled. And I was skin and bones, baby.

[B]

What was that?

[A]

Dextro amphetamine, 10 milligram, once a day. If I could get my hands on that shit right now, I'd look like a piece of paper blowing through the wind. It sucked the weight right off of me.

[B]

Really? Yeah, it did, but it made you look sickly.

[A]

But it made me skinny. Yeah. Anyways, people are gonna try to find that on the black market now and snort it.

[B]

No, they're not.

[A]

But I can confirm it was. It was insane.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I was driving, and then Landon's dad, Mom and dad were asking us. They were like, well, how fast were you going?

[B]

We're like.

[A]

We were going like 15 miles. And Landon's dad was like, now I can look on here and see how fast you were going. We were like 15 miles an hour.

[B]

We stuck to it. I was like, no, we wasn't going for, like, 25.

[A]

Maybe 20, Chad. Maybe 20.

[B]

Meanwhile, the whole front end of this thing is completely just bum, bum.

[A]

He checked, and we were going 65.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Hauling balls.

[B]

Yeah, we was.

[A]

But you know what? We live to tell about it.

[B]

Were we racing somebody?

[A]

No, I don't think so.

[B]

No. I'm pretty sure we were racing somebody on horses. We were on the Can Am and they were on horses.

[A]

Oh, yeah, Brandy. Yeah, we were racing horseback. And we were winning. But that horsepower beat us because we had a bump in the road. Or a stump, as one would say.

[B]

A stump in the field. I'm trying to think of other stories that we could tell like that, but there's just so many, and I don't know that. What was your favorite thing to do as a kid? Like, together, like, when we hung out. You know what? I always loved the St. Jude rodeo. Oh, my gosh.

[A]

I know. Listen, where we're from, back in old Ringgold, Georgia, they had the St. Jude rodeo every year. It was a rodeo put on by a family in our town and all the proceeds went to.

[B]

And that was like the only thing to do all year.

[A]

Children's Cancer Research Hospital. You know the one.

[B]

Really? They know what St. Jude is.

[A]

Yeah. It was really fun. I loved that.

[B]

Yeah, they. I don't. They had boiled peanuts.

[A]

Oh, they had.

[B]

They had the food. Listen, when I see a tent set up and do you remember.

[A]

Let me pause you right there.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

We used to go with our friends to these barrel races that they would have. Not necessarily a rodeo, but it was like a go. And a bunch of people would barrel race and there was always this little food truck set up and do you know where I'm going with this? There was always this little food truck set up and they had the best hot chocolate you have ever had. Where was this at Yates Farm, Yates Arena. I don't think I remember. I mean, I remember going, but I

[B]

don't think I ever remember having the

[A]

hot chocolate with Landon. They had this one little truck. They had hot chocolate every single time we.

[B]

Wow. Didn't get that. All I remember is eating out of the crock pot of the back of the horse.

[A]

You've gotta remember that.

[B]

I don't.

[A]

Landon, really? That was the best hot chocolate I've ever had.

[B]

The best hot chocolate that has ever crossed this earth is from McDonald's.

[A]

No. Where. It was that little. It was. Do you remember going to the high school baseball games? Oh, okay.

[B]

People are going to think I'm vaping, but I'm not.

[A]

Landon is hitting what is called a fume. It is a fidget air device and it.

[B]

It just has air in it. No battery, no, no, nothing like that. It literally just flavored air. And it helps my hand to mouth situation cuz I quit vaping.

[A]

And it helps with the oral fixation. And it's just flavored air and it's good as hell. You just draw it like.

[B]

And I said fidget with it.

[A]

I sit and fidget mine all the time. I didn't bring mine. I forgot it. But my favorite thing to do is to twist it.

[B]

Twist it. Yeah.

[A]

But fume has helped over 700000 people quit smoking and vaping. And you can try it. You can go to try fume.com. that's T-R-Y-F u-m.com forward slash bloodline. And if you purchase a journey pack, you will receive a free gift.

[B]

Yes. Or you can just use code bloodline. B L O O D. I check out at checkout.

[A]

It's pretty good and I love to fidget with it.

[B]

Yeah, it is good. Go buy them and let me know how you like.

[A]

What flavor do you have in.

[B]

You know.

[A]

I don't know. It's peach.

[B]

It is. I was about to say that.

[A]

It's so, like, airy.

[B]

Well, yeah, you're.

[A]

I mean, they're in the air. Smooth.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Anyways, trifune.com forward slash bloodline. Get a free gift with your purchase of a journey pack.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What were we talking about?

[B]

I don't know, but that just made me think. Yeah, I don't. You couldn't pay me to go to rodeo now. Really?

[A]

Why?

[B]

Watching them bulls buck like that and those horses go crazy gives me a

[A]

little bit of anxiety. You are such as Phil Robertson would say, a damn yuppie.

[B]

It kind of gives me anxiety to watch them do that. I don't care about anything else.

[A]

I wear boots twice a year when I go to the Dixie Stampede in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee. And when I go to the damn rodeo. Okay, you. I will put on the kickers to go.

[B]

I mean, like all the other stuff like the roping and the bell racing and the.

[A]

The only thing that I will say.

[B]

Rodeo clowns. Remember the rodeo clowns.

[A]

The only thing I will say that is a little bit inhumane to me is the steer wrestling.

[B]

I don't even care about that.

[A]

Where they jump off and grab the steer's neck and twist it around until it falls on the ground. That's a little much for me.

[B]

I don't ever. I don't even care about that, really. All I care about is just the people that are. I'm afraid they're going to get their head stepped on and I want to

[A]

go to the pbr. And you know, I caught a lot of for this a couple years ago because I was making fun of the girl outfits that the girls were weari wearing. And I'll be honest with you. Some of yalls outfits look like. But I would like to go because.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Nfr. Damn. Y' all really gonna talk about me? A professional bull riding association. NFR is the National Finals Rodeo. I know. Hell, put me on horseback.

[B]

You would ride.

[A]

I'll carry the flag.

[B]

We used to ride horses pretty good bit.

[A]

I used to ride horses all the time.

[B]

But I'd like to have a horse farm one day.

[A]

For what?

[B]

Just to have horses like maybe like 12 or 15. And I'm really nice.

[A]

So expensive.

[B]

No, just. Just horses to have.

[A]

Okay. I just want to go to the Kentucky Derby if I'm being completely honest. So if you can get me into the Kentucky Derby, somebody else come and ride the horses.

[B]

I'll ride them every once in a while, but I just want one of those really nice. I don't know if you call it a ranch or a farm.

[A]

Money pit, Landon. I don't care.

[B]

I want a really nice horse barn and a really nice house and it all be paved together in like a little pond with sprinkler sprinklers coming out of the po.

[A]

So you want a heartland from.

[B]

Yeah, I do, but I don't. With no wife and no kids.

[A]

No kids, but a bunch of horses and a paved gravel driveway and a nice inground pool.

[B]

And I want my house to be about 10,000 square foot and I want everybody to come over and I can

[A]

also want your house to be very modern.

[B]

I've kind of changed modern farmhouse vibe.

[A]

This is.

[B]

I'll show you a picture. I'll show you a. Blaine is gonna

[A]

have a damn barndominium.

[B]

No, I ain't. I'll show you an info picture right here. Please hold.

[A]

Anyways, my favorite part about the rodeo isn't watching everybody, isn't meeting everybody. It's eating a damn fried Oreo and a bull peanut.

[B]

This is my inside picture right here. That's nice.

[A]

That is nice. But I would have never imagined you to like that.

[B]

Why?

[A]

Because you don't like wood and you don't like living.

[B]

Well, there's no wood hardly around here. I don't know why I need an arena though. Because. Okay, but yeah, I guess I need one for the horses, but I'll have to hire somebody else to. I will hire a Sherry Duvous. Sure.

[A]

Devoe. Yeah, Alyssa. She's a badass, okay?

[B]

And if my.

[A]

My premise don't have watched her. If I have watched her say, come on, Jose. Come on, Jose. Yelling at her little jockey one time. I've watched it a hundred times. Okay? I could sit and watch her tear on that jockey.

[B]

And I just want to say this. Let me go ahead and say this and I'll be done on my. My tangent about this. If my premise don't have a gate to get in, I don't want it.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

But I'm also conflicted cuz I kind of just want a lake house.

[A]

Landon don't know what the hell he wants because last week you wanted to live in Beverly Hills in a square house with.

[B]

No, I've never wanted to live in Beverly Hills.

[A]

No, but like that kind of house. No, Landon, you grew up in Like a log cabin. And your whole life, you have hated the wood look so bad that you would live in a cardboard box if it meant it didn't have any wood in it. Back me up here, Kir.

[B]

I mean, yeah, that's true, but not a. Not a house with like, 47.

[A]

Landon wants to live in, like a Kim K. Like Kim Kardashian house.

[B]

Yeah, what's wrong with that?

[A]

You think Kim K. Lives on a horse farm?

[B]

I think that Kendall does. And her house is just as nice.

[A]

I think. I don't really know anything about them girls except that they're rich.

[B]

You gonna have to be rich to have 12 horses for fun. Because, I mean, hell, I'm gonna.

[A]

I don't want 12 horses for fun.

[B]

I'm gonna have to damn make. That's expensive as hell, ain't it?

[A]

Money pits. Especially if you ain't gonna ride them.

[B]

Well, I mean, you can't make enough damn money riding them anyways to pay for them.

[A]

I. I would say surety vogs make a pretty good. Yeah, but not.

[B]

That's just like your average Joe, you know?

[A]

Well, your average Joe doesn't have 32 horses in a barn with a sprinkler and a pavement, okay? The only reason I go to rodeos is for the food, okay?

[B]

Can we quit talking about this?

[A]

Well, let's talk about how we got it brought up.

[B]

I don't even know. Let's add to society. Should we give advice?

[A]

I don't think anybody wants her advice.

[B]

I have some advice for some people. We say it every week. Buy that sunrise flower.

[A]

Yes. Sunriseflowermail.com forward/banter. Go and get you some. Hey, you know what I was gonna do whenever I got home and I just had this idea. I think I'm gonna try to make some bread with that bread flour.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I literally just asked chat GPT healthy bread recipes, and it told me to put cottage cheese in it. So I think I'm gonna look again for a different recipe on the bag.

[B]

Yeah, there is.

[A]

I'm gonna go home and make me some bread because I've been.

[B]

I made cinnamon rolls the other day with my bread flour.

[A]

I know.

[B]

It is so good. It really does make a difference. You know, I used to be the flowers flour. You got Martha. And you know, like. But flour's not just have a loaf pan.

[A]

Because one time I decided to make some banana bread. And I think I'm going to. What if I put. What if I made the banana bread with the sunrise flour? Yeah, I'm going To do that whenever I get home. So go to sunriseflowermeal.com banter or use code banter at checkout for 20% off your order.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Your first order?

[B]

Yes. Okay.

[A]

Anyways, what were we talking about?

[B]

I don't know. I was going to give.

[A]

Okay, so what are you going to do at the gym later?

[B]

I don't quite know. I have to look at my workout plan. Okay, let me.

[A]

You're gonna laugh at me when I say this, but I kind of mean it. I kind of want to get into running.

[B]

Okay. That's easier than the gym running. You don't have to know how to do it, you just do it. That's the reason I don't go to the gym.

[A]

Yeah, but I don't want to just run. I want to be like one of them runners like on Tik Tok. I don't want to post it, but I want to like have little energy gels that you carry and like the nice running shoes and like the vest. Cuz I want to look good when I do it and I want to run and

[B]

yeah, I would run. Like I run a marathon.

[A]

I would love to run a 5k. Would you do that with me?

[B]

Well, hell no, because I ain't running.

[A]

It's very ironic for me to say this because I have flat feet. My whole life I've had flat feet and like.

[B]

And he uses an excuse for everything.

[A]

No, I haven't in a long time because it doesn't bother me. After I lost £110.

[B]

Well, it used to bother you all the time.

[A]

Yeah. Cuz I was big as a house. Well, I'd say when you had £320 going down on them joints, your feet got flat. Yeah, they would. They'd get pretty damn.

[B]

Well, all I remember is the only thing that helped you do was get that medical golf cart.

[A]

I. I played golf in high school and middle school and I did, I will say the ghsa, Georgia High school sports is association gave my big ass a golf cart that I could ride around on and it was the shit. Okay. I will say I didn't have to carry my bag. I put it on the back. My grandpa.

[B]

And nobody else got afforded that luxury.

[A]

No, Nobody else had five feet.

[B]

Nobody else £320 either.

[A]

You're right. But I was pretty damn. I hit that ball pretty Damn far. Cause 310lbs of ass behind.

[B]

Put some horsepower behind.

[A]

Put some horsepower behind that bitch. I was John Daly up on that hoe.

[B]

Oh my gosh.

[A]

But I really do want to try running. But it's ironic because I remember in sixth grade, I was in weight training with coach Green, and I got put in there because art was full, and they put me in weight training, and we used to have to run the parking lot.

[B]

Do you ever think to yourself, if you would have just joined weight training then, what would your life be like now?

[A]

Yeah, I'd probably look like a brick house. If I turned 300 pounds in a muscle, I'd probably look like, damn, John Cena. Yeah, you can't see me, but everybody could see me because I was bigger now. Anyways, we would run around the parking lot, and if one person stopped, we had to run another mile. So I would run down until I got behind the coach's truck because he had a big super duty Ford. And I'd stop and everybody would run around me, and they didn't say nothing because they didn't want to run another mile. So I was staying there for three days, and then I got switched out, and they found room for me in art.

[B]

I never got put in weight training. Ever. Ever. I got put in art. I had PE one time.

[A]

It was caught. It was quite traumatic, actually.

[B]

Just I. I didn't like physical movement either.

[A]

I. I didn't either.

[B]

I had a high metabolism, so I was thankful for that, but I didn't really like to move physically, and I've been to the gym maybe seven times my whole life.

[A]

Landon got that high metabolism from his dad's side of the family because I'm related to him on his mom's side of the family.

[B]

And my mom ain't fat.

[A]

No, I'm not talking about your mama. I'm talking.

[B]

My mom's side of the family ain't fat.

[A]

The Mitchells.

[B]

Not my side of the Mitchells.

[A]

I didn't. I'm not talking about your immediate family. I'm talking about your relatives on our side of the family. Yeah, but like, as in grandparents, uncles, aunts, my grandparents. Landon, I'm not talking about you. I know.

[B]

Well, that's the Mitchells. Edward ain't fat. Jennifer ain't fat.

[A]

I'm not talking about Edward or Jennifer, Landon. I'm talking about all the brothers this side of the family. No, not the brothers this side of the family. They're all. They're. Metabolism catches up to him eventually. Name one person in our family the metabolism hasn't caught up to. There's not very many, and I was. There's about two enough. Two?

[B]

Your mom and Edward and Lloyd and Edward.

[A]

Okay, but still Landon I'm just saying our side. Listen, high metabolism and big bakery runs in my family. And it.

[B]

It can only with like a select few of them, though. Landon Riley. I'm serious. I can think of like 20 right now that aren't fatter than a triple wide trailer.

[A]

I think everybody in the family has been at one point not fat, but bigger than they are now. Okay, we just went off on a wild damned goose chase. We done letting you in on the family reunion.

[B]

You know what goose chase made me think of? In Leanne Morgan's comment comedy special, she goes, well, what was I not supposed to do? Buy a Chevy with a goose neck? Okay, how to take this out.

[A]

Landon will pop them. Damn. And visit line in and out 100 times. And he didn't wear his last tray. So yesterday he put in his new

[B]

one and he went, I did wear my last tray. I just forgot to wear it for two days. And then I put this one in and my teeth have already shifted. My teeth shifted 7 inches already. I need to get my wisdom teeth taken out.

[A]

Yeah, Landon needs to get his wisdom teeth taken out and he still hasn't.

[B]

What else was I going to talk to you about today? I sent it in our messages, but I forgot I have a list.

[A]

And you're probably thinking, how unprofessional. This is not scripted. We just have topics.

[B]

Why do you say that every time? Even if it was scripted, who gives a. I do.

[A]

Because I don't want to watch some unauthentic.

[B]

Riley, nobody thinks.

[A]

Okay, I do have a question. What job do you think you would be fired from immediately?

[B]

What job do I think I would be fired?

[A]

Like any profession.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Not like 711 or like Costco. Like a career? Yes,

[B]

probably a surgeon or anything in the medical field.

[A]

Why?

[B]

Because I'm not wiping an ass and surgeons don't want passes and I'm not cutting nobody's appendix out. I'll puke.

[A]

Okay, but like, people don't just become surgeons.

[B]

Okay, well, you asked it and I answered your damn question. Okay, what about you?

[A]

I probably like a funeral home director.

[B]

No, I thrive in that.

[A]

Well, that's because you don't have any emotion.

[B]

It's not about that.

[A]

Which funeral directors can't really have much emotion because they deal with it every day. But I mean, like, listen, funeral directors, though, they have to be very, like, they have a. Have to have a good bedside manner.

[B]

I don't.

[A]

You don't like.

[B]

I have a good bedside man.

[A]

You don't like dealing with People when

[B]

they cry, I don't deal with them.

[A]

Okay? How the hell would you be a funeral director?

[B]

They don't deal with them.

[A]

Yeah, they actually. I have exactly what they do.

[B]

They do, but like, it's not like, oh, baby, come here, lay my lamp, let me pet you.

[A]

What are you gonna do? Look at him and say, well, everybody had to die at some point. It just happened to be granny's time, so get the over it.

[B]

It's not funny. I'm not laughing at that. Don't start, don't start. Granny has to die eventually. I'm not laughing at somebody dying. I'm just laughing at me. Trying to put myself in that position to console somebody at a funeral home when they die. I didn't say so. Off for everybody that has an opinion about it.

[A]

I'm not talking. I didn't say you were.

[B]

I don't care. Off to the topic. Onto the next. I'm not putting up with no today I will cut you.

[A]

Damn.

[B]

Anyways, I had something else in my notes and now I forgot. Oh, I can see my boxers. Please hold me. Pull my shorts down in between,

[A]

I mean.

[B]

Quit hunching. What are we talking about? Shut the hell up.

[A]

I have another thing on here and it says the Internet has destroyed embarrassment. And I. I feel that to my core.

[B]

Wait, what?

[A]

The Internet has destroyed embarrassment.

[B]

I'm glad you're glad.

[A]

Do you know what that means? Yeah, like, it means people have no shame to film their stuff crying and posting it.

[B]

Yeah, that's. I thought you meant like couples arguing. Embarrassing.

[A]

Like I can't stand when people seek for attention. It's like the. That wear the hospital brand for 13 weeks.

[B]

If you wear a hospital band out of the hospital, you are a psychopath.

[A]

I'm going to run for congress so we can pass a law that the hospital.

[B]

I went to school with a girl.

[A]

Son of a bitch. Off before you leave those.

[B]

I went to school with a girl that wore that damn hospital band year round.

[A]

That and the damn bitches that play volleyball that wear the knee brace one time in the neighborhood and they have

[B]

to wear a knee brace the rest

[A]

of their life on the outside of their pants. Now, God forbid we have skin to skin contact with the knee braids. It has to go over the Lululemon dupes from TikTok Shop like this.

[B]

I went to school and you already know who I'm thinking of.

[A]

I know, I think they tore their

[B]

ACL in like maybe the sixth grade or something. And I kid you not, they wore that brace until senior year of high school.

[A]

At her high school graduation. She is. Lord help, I can't stand that. And another thing I hate is couples on social media.

[B]

Nobody depends on who it is.

[A]

The ones that always are either together, not together. They're hate each other at one point, then they love each other, or like, they constantly. Like, I can't stand the people who set up the phone and pretend like the phone's not there, and then they're pranking their significant other.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought you meant, like, the other couples. Like, I follow a couple. Like Sam and Jess are good.

[A]

Oh, I follow a lot of couples that I like. Like, I'm mutual with a lot of people.

[B]

But you're talking about the ones that do the pranks and the.

[A]

Not just the pranks. I'm not talking about any one in particular. I'm just saying, like. Yeah, you are.

[B]

Name drop.

[A]

I'm not talking about anything.

[B]

Rally's a vagina.

[A]

No, I'm not. I'm not talking about any there. I can't name draw. There's several of them.

[B]

Well, damn. Well, then I got time.

[A]

No, I'm not. I'm talking about any of them. They're all on Tick Tock. Riley, I can't deal with. But anyways, I just. Who is texting?

[B]

Go look at you now and tell me you don't have that same reaction. It makes me want to throw my phone straight through that window and hit my apartment complex. That's how mad it makes me. And I could throw it that far.

[A]

Throw it.

[B]

I'm about to name drop.

[A]

No, you're not.

[B]

Anyways, no, you don't have to feel left out. We. Yeah. Anyways, on to the let's. Let's do bloodline brain check. You want to do that?

[A]

Yeah. This episode is really just taking a

[B]

turn for the worst.

[A]

Hell, everybody's gonna think we're just sitting here over here, talking and being.

[B]

Well, we can't talk. Speaking of talking, let me tell you something. I make a tick tock this about this later, and it's directed straight at you. Don't ever call me and ask me for my opinions about something and then get turn into a vagina when I hurt your feelings because you need to not know the truth.

[A]

No, no, no. We're gonna have both sides of the story. This morning I was in the shower. I was sitting there because I sat in the shower and I was scrolling tick tock. Landon FaceTimed me. I'm not gonna answer him when I'm in The shower. I didn't know.

[B]

I FaceTimed. That's the whole thing.

[A]

Then I called him back and I said, hey, did you call me? He said, no, and he's laying like this on the couch.

[B]

No, I didn't.

[A]

Yeah, you did. I said, I just got a FaceTime from. He said, no, you didn't. I said, yes, I did. I literally showed him where I FaceTimed him.

[B]

My phone clearly don't work.

[A]

Okay, well. And then the call drops. I thought his ass hung up on me. I guess he said. He said the call drops. So it did. The connection was trying to undo his WI Fi or something like that.

[B]

Okay, pertaining to what I'm.

[A]

And then the call dropped and I said, this bitch hung up on me. So I called him back and I said, what is wrong with you and the college?

[B]

And I said, nothing.

[A]

And then.

[B]

There's nothing wrong with you.

[A]

No, no, no. That anxiety medicine. I took about 20.

[B]

I don't need anxiety medicine. I need something else.

[A]

What?

[B]

Something stronger than that. Anyways, that. That didn't even

[A]

talk about.

[B]

I just told you. Whenever somebody calls me and asks for my opinion on something, I tell them and they don't like what I have to say. Don't ask for my opinion if you don't want the damn truth. Riley's wanting to write a book, and he wrote me the introduction. He read me the introduction.

[A]

I do want to write a book. I want to be a New York Times bestselling author. And I think I read the introduction and Landon started comparing the introduction to everybody else's book. I don't want my book to be like everybody else's bitch.

[B]

I didn't. Wasn't comparing it to everybody else.

[A]

Yes, the fuck you were.

[B]

No, I wasn't.

[A]

Landon, you said, well, that's not how so and so's book starts out. I don't have to be. No, I'm just trying to give you

[B]

examples of a good book. Well, your book also don't need to say. What did you say in your. What was that one sentence?

[A]

I said the word in fact. And you'd have thought that I said supercalifragilase against biology.

[B]

If you're writing a book about your life and it's like a memoir based or whatever, and you start the sentence off with in fact.

[A]

I didn't start the sentence off well.

[B]

In fact. In any sentence.

[A]

In fact, Landon, that's a normal word that most people know what it means,

[B]

but you never say it. And I just feel like you don't

[A]

usually Say it when you're talking to somebody.

[B]

That's how my book would be.

[A]

Okay, well, congrats.

[B]

It would be who I am deep down.

[A]

That is who I am. I'm a good writer. I had a one in English know

[B]

that you don't say. In fact.

[A]

Okay, well, I'll change it to probably.

[B]

That's better.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

People would like that better. More relatable.

[A]

Anyways.

[B]

Anyways, he asked my advice. I gave it to him. He didn't like it. So off. That's the whole point of this whole entire conversation. If you come to me and you want my opinion on something and I give it to you, don't be mad. Whenever you don't.

[A]

Anyways. Bloodline brain check.

[B]

Ask me questions I don't even want to anymore. You don't piss me off.

[A]

Well, get over it. We're recording.

[B]

I don't care.

[A]

We're at the 34 minute mark. We got about 25 more minutes to go.

[B]

I. I'm gonna go ahead and say something else too, but I can't say it on camera no more.

[A]

What?

[B]

I can't. It'll embarrass you.

[A]

I'm just glad you took that into consideration.

[B]

I almost didn't. We'd had to cut it. What am I doing? He's quiet now.

[A]

I said ask her, bitch. If you're gonna say it, say it.

[B]

I can't.

[A]

Then shut up about it.

[B]

Trick questions. Not trick questions.

[A]

We've not argued on the podcast in a minute. Maybe this episode would do real good. This is not fake.

[B]

I don't even know the answer to this. But I didn't even know there was an answer to this. What does WWW stand for?

[A]

Weight Watchers Worldwide. I don't know. What is it?

[B]

I don't know. What is W? I think like www.but what does that stand for?

[A]

Wi.

[B]

Wi.

[A]

Website.

[B]

Will we.

[A]

Wonderful website.

[B]

Capital of Kentucky.

[A]

Richmond.

[B]

Don't know.

[A]

Why don't you say give me the answer?

[B]

They don't have the answers on here.

[A]

Are you on chat GPT?

[B]

Yeah, I am.

[A]

Say, give me the answers.

[B]

Okay, there's. There's like a hundred.

[A]

Okay, say give me these questions again with the answers. That way you know the questions again

[B]

with the end with the answers. I know this one.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Which Kardashian was married to Kanye Kim? Yeah. What planet is closest to the sun?

[A]

Mercury.

[B]

Yeah. Now what's the hottest planet?

[A]

Mars. Mercury. Cause it's the closest to the sun.

[B]

No, neither of those are right.

[A]

What is.

[B]

No, Saturn's the one with the Rings around them, the hottest planet.

[A]

Okay, Bill and I give it to you. Venus. There's no way it's Venus.

[B]

It is.

[A]

How is Venus hotter than the one that's closest to the sun?

[B]

Hottest planet, planet. It's Venus. I know it is Venus, not Mercury. Even though Mercury is closer to the sun, Venus has extremely thick atmosphere full of carbon dioxide that traps heat through a massive greenhouse effect. You may tell you what planet greenhouse gas.

[A]

You may tell you what planet I care about.

[B]

Earth.

[A]

Earth. Because I'm here. I don't give a what happens.

[B]

What do you think about people wanting to like, go to space and all that?

[A]

I think they're stupid. Why would you want to leave the comfort of the.

[B]

Oh, by the way, the capital of Kentucky is Frankfort.

[A]

Who the knew that? That sounds like something in Germany.

[B]

What's the opposite of transparent?

[A]

Translucent. Opaque, yes.

[B]

Do you remember that stuff you could make with cornstarch and water?

[A]

Oobleck.

[B]

Is that what that is?

[A]

I'm pretty sure.

[B]

Do you know what I'm talking about? Oblique. Oblique. It's like you mess with it and it like turns hard. And then you leave it in your hand.

[A]

No, it just goes. No, you leave it alone. And it's hard, but you pick it up. It's like liquid.

[B]

No, you mess. You gotta crunch it to make it hard. And then it's like liquidity when it. When you're not making it.

[A]

I think he's contradicting himself.

[B]

No, like if you put it. If you put cornstarch and water in a bottle. Yeah, but if you, like, mix it

[A]

up, leave it there, it's hard. But then if you try to mess with it, it turns into liquid.

[B]

Yeah, but I'm saying you can also, like, put it in your hand and like crunch it together. And then if. When you quit crunching it, it like falls to liquid. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyways, What year. If you don't know this, we have to stop. And then you have to answer. Ask me some.

[A]

What.

[B]

What year did Christopher Columbus sell the great blue sea?

[A]

1492.

[B]

Yes. Which blood top is universal donor?

[A]

Oh, negative.

[B]

Do you have that?

[A]

No, my mom does. Really? She gets a call from Blood. Where do you. Positive. You just ask him.

[B]

I don't.

[A]

I don't. It might be on the back of your license.

[B]

It's not.

[A]

It's on the back of mine.

[B]

I'm not an organ donor.

[A]

I'm not either, actually. I think I am.

[B]

You are an organ donor?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh,

[A]

let me look and see.

[B]

My blood type is not on the back of my license. No.

[A]

Yeah, mine is.

[B]

What is it?

[A]

A positive, I think.

[B]

You had to be an organ donor. Are you an organ donor? Kirsten, you don't have to have a. Hell, no medical information. None.

[A]

Okay, well, yeah, I'm an organ donor. Let me make sure. I am.

[B]

I'm not. You could never. That sounds rude of me to say, but I'm not an organ donor. I don't have any plans on being an organ donor. I never will be an organ donor. Would you. Are you gonna follow through with that?

[A]

Well, I mean, my whole life, I've kind of been afraid of it because I don't want them to, like, take my skin, take my eyeballs, whatever. No, they're going to, but I've come to the realization.

[B]

They take your skin.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Yes, they do. Your skin is the biggest organ on your body.

[A]

They take anything they can. If you're an organ donor, they will take anything that they need. No, they take anything. They take your eyeballs.

[B]

They ain't getting my skin.

[A]

Regardless, I have always kind of been afraid of it, but I've come to the realization that, like, if I'm dead, I don't care what you do, just make sure I'm dead. That just because I have an irrational

[B]

fear of being buried, I would donate an organ. What's like a kidney or something. To someone while I was alive. Yeah, I would do that.

[A]

I would do that, too, depending on who it was.

[B]

But I wouldn't. You're not getting my stuff when I die. That's just how. I'm probably not even gonna be healthy enough. Probably the time it gets here, because I'm.

[A]

Who knows? You're on a whole journey.

[B]

Yeah, but I'm never gonna quit drinking. I'm never gonna quit drinking Coke anyways. Ask me bloodline brain check questions.

[A]

Okay, let me look some up, because I prepare. Are you hungry? Yes.

[B]

You are? Well, who. And I was gonna meal prep after this? We'll do Cousin Council and then. Hey, did you meal prep?

[A]

Yeah. Well, yesterday.

[B]

God, this podcast episode is all over the place.

[A]

What is the only US State that grows coffee commercially?

[B]

Grows coffee.

[A]

Think of what the weather has to be like to grow coffee.

[B]

I don't know what the weather has to be like to grow coffee. Florida.

[A]

No.

[B]

Okay. Montana?

[A]

No. Hawaii.

[B]

That was close to Florida.

[A]

No, actually, it's not at all close to Florida.

[B]

The climate.

[A]

Yeah, but geographically, nowhere near.

[B]

No, I'm talking about the environment. I was going either. Yeah, I mean warm, moist, wet, humid. Or the complete opposite, which would be Montana.

[A]

What country consumes the most Coca Cola per capita?

[B]

It has to be the United States of America.

[A]

Mexico.

[B]

Yeah, but they have real coke there.

[A]

I know.

[B]

Mexican Coke.

[A]

What does the Q and Q tip stand for? I didn't know it stood for anything, to be honest.

[B]

Quantity.

[A]

No. You're close.

[B]

Quantive? Quantitative.

[A]

No.

[B]

Quality?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Quality. Okay.

[A]

What is the capital? We've already. I asked you this one last week. What planet rotates on its side?

[B]

Sorry? What planet rotates on its side?

[A]

Yeah, you're giving me the echo that I don't care.

[B]

Y' all can all off put it. Saturn.

[A]

No.

[B]

Mars.

[A]

No.

[B]

No. Because they're trying to go to Mars. Mercury.

[A]

No.

[B]

Venus.

[A]

No.

[B]

Pluto.

[A]

Hell, you've only got a couple more. Go ahead. Pluto.

[B]

Jupiter.

[A]

No, I think you've got, like, two left.

[B]

Bitch. Come on, Earth. And I know it's not Earth. I don't know what.

[A]

You've got, like, one left. Uranus.

[B]

Oh, I thought that wasn't a. Yeah, it is.

[A]

How many sides does a decagon have?

[B]

Deca. 8.

[A]

No.

[B]

10.

[A]

No.

[B]

12. Yes.

[A]

Who invented the telephone?

[B]

Alexander Graham Bell. Yeah.

[A]

Your phone ain't working. What?

[B]

Yeah, I do need to call him up because my phone don't work. It doesn't.

[A]

What was Netflix originally known for? I did not know this.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

DVD rentals by mail. I thought that was the red box. Yeah, but before. Y' all remember the red box?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, I remember the red box.

[A]

We would go to the damn CVS all the time to get a new movie. And we'd go home, we'd go to cvs, then we'd go to the Chinese restaurant and get takeout. Then we'd drive home, watch the movie. And then the next time we had Chinese food, we would take it back and get a new one.

[B]

Yeah, I don't know.

[A]

You remember going to the Blockbuster?

[B]

I remember the Blockbuster.

[A]

Oh, hell, I'd up the Blockbuster. It was right next to the Walmart. And the Chinese restaurant is in the same shopping center of the Walmart. We do the same damn thing with the Blockbuster, baby.

[B]

Yes. Okay, we're getting into Cousin Council.

[A]

All right, let's get into Cousin Council. And listen, we know we said we would have the robes and the gavels this time. I ordered them. They are, in fact, in transit. But, you know, you never know what you're actually have.

[B]

Everything. We're just missing one gavel with them. And I refuse not to have a gavel. So, yeah, I have to have one. But they're coming. Okay. Subject cousin, council submission. Hey, bloodline banter. I have a situation. That sounds made up, but it's 100 real. My dad used to date my math teacher's sister, and it ended really badly, like, cheating on her with multiple girls. Ever since then, my math teacher has treated me differently in class, and it's been really uncomfortable. I finally asked my dad about it, and he admitted everything and basically said that's why my teacher acts the way she does toward me. Now I feel like I'm st the middle of something I had nothing to do with, but I'm the one dealing with it every day at school. What should I do in this situation? Do I say something to the teacher, Go to the counselor, or just try to ignore it? You don't go to the counselor. You don't ignore it. You tell the teacher that your dad's problems are not your own and to get off your damn back and shut the hell up. And if you have a problem with it, you get your ass whooped in the parking lot.

[A]

I would not say that as a student, okay? See, I'm not a snitch. But honestly, I'd go to the principal and be like, yo, my mama used to date her sister. My. My. I mean, my daddy used to date her sister. My dad was an. Something fell through. Or maybe your dad wasn't an.

[B]

No, he cheated on her.

[A]

Okay. Yeah, my dad was an fell through. And, you know, I hate that my dad did that, but this teacher's treating me differently. And you needed to tell Ms.

[B]

So and so Blank. She didn't give a name.

[A]

That. Yeah, don't matter. Teacher needs to drop her problems at the door when she goes in to teach.

[B]

Amen.

[A]

That was personal problems.

[B]

That's very good.

[A]

Pick them back up when you leave.

[B]

But anyways, you should definitely handle it.

[A]

Yeah, I would handle it. Yeah?

[B]

Yeah. Would you handle it the way I handled it?

[A]

No. My nana probably would.

[B]

My mom would.

[A]

Yes. Yep.

[B]

This. The subject of this is my boyfriend and his gay girl best friend.

[A]

I read this one. I actually had this one wrote down for me. Yep. Go ahead.

[B]

Go ahead. You can read it.

[A]

I don't know that I have it pulled up.

[B]

It's a long one. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. For the year we were together, he was perfect. No red flags, nothing. But recently, in the last five months, he has been slowly introducing me to his gay best friend. Before then, he had never mentioned her once. So she's lesbian. Yes. Right. He told me one day on a Date that she had been sending him drunk voice messages and that he used to have a crush on her all throughout middle and high school till he met me. He also shares that she had picked everything that she had picked everything we had done on our date side did not plan. So she, I guess like told him where to go, what to do. Okay. So I did a little digging and had a girlfriend experiment and turns out she is straight when she is drunk. She's straight when she is drunk. She and him go to school and leave school together and are together 24 7. Him and I go to different schools. Also recently found out that she is higher on his best friends list on snapchat as well as their chat background being a picture of them, the two of them. I have discussed how I do not trust her with him and he said nothing will will ever happen between them. But still continues to talk to me about her boy problems and how stupid they are. Boy problems or girl problems?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

I don't. Sounds like you've got a bisexual situation. Situation on your hands.

[A]

I would tell her, hey, p. S.

[B]

Are we going to wait? Would you guys consider this cheating? And what should I do? I don't know.

[A]

I don't know either. I think you need to sit him down and her down and be like, look, I don't know if you're really

[B]

a lesbian, but you ain't get my boyfriend.

[A]

No.

[B]

And if he don't, if he has a problem with that, then listen, if,

[A]

you know, I don't think that you should control who your significant other is friends with. But it sounds to me like she

[B]

needs to make up if she likes.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The kitty cat or the dangling or the dingling. Yeah.

[A]

I don't think she knows.

[B]

Which could be a problem.

[A]

Yeah. Especially in this situation. I think that, you know, I don't think you should control who he's friends with. But in this situation where, like, it's kind of like they have a thing but they don't have a thing, I'd ask him. I'd ask both of them.

[B]

What the. I would too. I would too.

[A]

I need you guys.

[B]

We were going to college together and I'm scared because my parents love him more than me. Oof.

[A]

I tell you, mama, he's.

[B]

Don't it suck when the family loves?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, it does. It does. You know, I'm asking what the. And then I'm gonna need you to email back a response and tell me.

[B]

Yeah, I kind of need to update on this.

[A]

Yeah, I do, actually.

[B]

What's your name? Kylie.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm gonna need to update on this. Please. Email spec. Okay, I have another one. This was kind of serious. I think they're just one advice. I'm from Kansas and I'm moving to North Carolina in two weeks. I'll be there for two. Two years because that's the rest of my husband's military term. But I'm really scared and nervous to leave home. What's your advice for moving away from everything and everyone you know? P s. Y' all are some funny ass people and make my day better. Thank you, Presley. Moving from Kansas to North Carolina.

[A]

I will say Landon has moved before. Like, before moving.

[B]

I'm about to answer this because I can. I'm the have the building.

[A]

Yeah. Landon has no emotional attachment to anything. He will get up and haul ass out of anywhere. I will say it was kind of hard for me to leave my hometown. Not because I was scared or like anything like that, but I just didn't know anything other than I didn't know anything other than where I'd lived my whole life. And I lived in a town full of 6,000 people. So, I mean, moving to the capital once you get there and settle down, a big shock. But I will say this. I would do it again in a heartbeat. I obviously miss my friends and family back home, but there's nothing better than just getting out of the place you were raised because your mindset opens up a lot. You don't really care what anybody thinks about you after that. I never really did when I was home either.

[B]

But, like, see, I moved when I was younger.

[A]

Landon moved when he was 18 to 10.

[B]

I moved it. Yeah. Like outskirts, Seaside. And for a year, I enjoyed it. I loved it.

[A]

I. I have.

[B]

And then I moved back for a couple years, and then I moved here.

[A]

I've had the opportunity to move away from home a lot. And yes, I am where I've had the opportunity to move away from home a lot. And I never did until I moved to Nashville. And I wish I would have sooner.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So do it. Don't worry about it. You'll make new friends. You'll keep in touch with the ones that you have, and it's gonna be okay. And if anybody doesn't support you, go tell them to fuck their self.

[B]

Yeah. And just. Yeah. Yeah. North Carolina is a great state, too.

[A]

It is. You got the beach and the mountains. So who knows? You might live in the mountains and get tired of the mountains, want to drive to the beach or vice versa. So you kind of got the best of both worlds.

[B]

Wilmington, North Carolina, is a nice place.

[A]

I've heard.

[B]

Yep. Anyways.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Well, that concludes Cousin council for the day.

[A]

Yeah. So sending.

[B]

We're gonna have to get our robes in asap.

[A]

We are sending your stories, confession submissions to [e-mail] and who knows, you may hear yours on the next episode.

[B]

Yeah. Also, drop your number. We'd love to call some of you.

[A]

Yeah, we started calling people last time and it was actually kind of entertaining. So if you want us to call

[B]

you and talk about your situation, drop your number.

[A]

Yeah, drop your number, and we may end up calling you on the pod.

[B]

Yep. Anyways, Presley, keep me updated on your move to North Carolina.

[A]

Best of luck and you'll be fine. Don't worry about it.

[B]

Are you ready to conclude this episode?

[A]

I think we are. Sorry, this episode's kind of been all over the place, actually. Yeah, but some people like that, some people don't. We really didn't have any structure going in.

[B]

Well, the two critiques we get is we need longer episodes or we need two episodes a week.

[A]

We will work on the two episodes. We might have something cooking up with that behind the scenes. But as far as longer episodes, I mean, this is.

[B]

I can only talk for so long before I run out of to say.

[A]

Yeah. And I usually don't run out. Honest with you. I gotta go to the Apple store because if I'm gonna work out, I'm not gonna do it in vain. So I need to have my Apple Watch. Sucks. So I have to be at the Apple store in 45 minutes because I just bought a new Apple Watch.

[B]

Okay, well, everybody, we'll talk to you later. I guess.

[A]

Add us on Snapchat, make sure you're subscribed down below and. Yeah, we'll catch you next Thursday.

[B]

Love you. Bye. Love you.

[A]

Bye.