BFCM Week Survival Episode: Anxiety, Pressure, and the Real Talk Operators Need

Summary

Brain Driven Brands – BFCM Week Survival Episode: Anxiety, Pressure, and the Real Talk Operators Need

Host: Sarah Levinger
Date: November 26, 2025

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Episode Overview

This special episode of Brain Driven Brands tackles the immense stress and anxiety that operators, media buyers, and D2C marketers face heading into Black Friday and Cyber Monday (BFCM) week. Instead of just tactics and sales advice, host Sarah Levinger and her co-host (Nate) open up about the psychological toll of Q4—a period rife with pressure, performance fears, and burnout. The duo share practical, science-backed tips to keep your mental health in check while steering your e-commerce business through one of the most chaotic retail seasons.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The BFCM “Meh” Feeling & Industry Anxiety

• Many operators report 2025's BFCM feels lackluster and more stressful than usual.
  • "This year in particular, a lot of people are talking about the fact that this Black Friday just feels meh." (Sarah, 01:15)
• Industry chatter (especially on Twitter) is fueling a sense that "this one sucks," but stress is always high this time of year.
• Both hosts recall experiencing panic attacks in past BFCMs, highlighting the universal, recurring nature of Q4 anxiety.

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Tactical Tips to Survive BFCM Stress

1. Zoom Out: Recognize the Annual Cycle

• Nate journals about business feelings monthly; every year, the pattern repeats: excitement, fear, and then relief by December.
• "By December 1st, I'm like, BFCM ripped. So... one, you're probably going to have a good Black Friday." (Nate, 02:39)
• Advice: Zoom out; this happens every year. Recognize your feelings—and survival—are part of a repeatable cycle.

2. To-Do Lists: Keep It Ultra-Simple

• Sarah only allows five (maximum seven) items on her to-do list, based on neuroscience.
• "It's not good for your human brain to see a to-do list that has 80 things on it... Five things tops." (Sarah, 03:26)
• Focus on “goal lists” not endless tasks; too many items leads to overwhelm and inaction.
• Practical example: A friend only keeps a "next year" list, staying disciplined to current priorities (Connor McDonald anecdote at 04:37).

3. Do Less, but Better

• "Now's the time to keep it simple, slow down, do less, do a few things really well." (Nate, 04:33)
• Avoid the urge to add last-minute campaigns or fire drills; consolidate efforts and trust the seasonal buying surge.

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Life & Wellbeing Hacks for Q4

4. Get Outside & Move

• Take intentional breaks for sunlight, fresh air, grounding, or just working from a coffee shop.
• "I cannot tell you guys what a half hour outside does for me mentally." (Nate, 05:31)
• Avoid isolation: If remote, change environments to stave off feeling “cut off” from the world.

5. Plan Fun (and Phone-Free) Activities

• Schedule time for personal events, like a concert, with a strict “no work phones” rule.
• "Plan something... three hours is a good time for an event. Put your phone away." (Nate, 06:09)
• A short block off from work will not impact next week’s sales—and massively boosts mental recovery.

6. Use “Food Treats” as Healthy Dopamine Hits

• Small, controlled rewards for non-monetary achievements (e.g., standing once an hour, not just sales milestones).
• "Food is a very good dopamine increaser... I'll set a goal, like stand up once an hour, and if I hit that, I get a pink Starburst." (Sarah, 07:48)
• Celebrate “you” often, especially as an operator or media buyer.

7. Sober Q4: Avoid Alcohol Until It’s Over

• Nate recommends not drinking alcohol during BFCM if you’re stressed—hangover anxiety makes everything worse.
• "Three years ago was actually when I started doing sober Q4s. I knew this was a super high stress time for me." (Nate, 09:22)
• Postpone celebrations until after BFCM, when the mental load lifts.

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Perspective: The Big Picture

• Don’t take drastic, high-risk actions out of stress or FOMO.
  • "If you just kind of sit back and chill, you will stack cash in the next 10 days... If you didn't do anything else in your business for the rest of the year, you'd make more money in the next 30 days than you did in the prior one." (Nate, 10:12)
• Remember, this isn’t life or death:
  • "We're not saving lives. Okay? We're running ads." (Sarah, 10:37)
• Reflect on the privilege of remote digital work and staying grounded in gratitude.
  • "None of this matters. Somehow we make a living sitting in air conditioned offices, clicking buttons on a laptop... It's magic what we do." (Nate, 10:54)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• "You're probably always feeling exactly how you feel right now at this time of year, and you survived, so you'll be all right." (Nate, 03:15)
• "Please, dear God, don't make to-do lists that way... Five things tops." (Sarah, 03:34)
• "Go outside, get some fresh air and sunlight... I cannot tell you guys what a half hour outside does for me mentally." (Nate, 05:30)
• "Plan something... Put your phone away. There's nothing I can do for three hours on a Friday that's really gonna make us revenue for next week." (Nate, 06:24)
• "Celebrate when you do something that's good for you... It's so critical to maintain your mental health during this time of the year." (Sarah, 08:13)
• "If you are stressed about bfcm, do not drink alcohol until it's over." (Nate, 09:18)
• "We're not saving lives... Be okay, everyone." (Sarah, 10:37–10:54)

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Key Timestamps

• 00:54 – 01:15: Setting the episode focus: BFCM stress & industry-wide anxiety
• 02:11 – 03:20: Journaling & recognizing the yearly stress cycle
• 03:26 – 04:28: Optimizing to-do lists with neuroscience in mind
• 05:19 – 05:49: Getting outside, sunlight, and combating isolation
• 06:09 – 06:33: Planning restorative, phone-free downtime
• 07:48 – 08:13: Rewarding yourself with “food treats” for healthy motivation
• 09:18 – 09:53: Advocating for a sober Q4
• 10:12 – 10:54: Encouragement to zoom out, don’t panic, and be grateful
• 11:22 – 11:39: Final tip: Find a friend in the industry for support

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Final Takeaways

• Keep perspective—BFCM anxiety is cyclical and shared.
• Simplify your tasks, focus on high-leverage activities, and don’t chase every minor optimization.
• Prioritize mental and emotional wellbeing: sunlight, nature, rest, fun, and healthy treats.
• Avoid self-medication (like alcohol) during stressful periods.
• Celebrate small wins, reach out to industry friends, and remember: you’re already surviving—and sometimes, that’s enough.

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Hosts:

• Sarah Levinger – @SarahLevenger
• Nate – @aatelagos

If you appreciated the episode, share, subscribe, and keep your mental health front of mind this BFCM season.

Transcript

[A]

Was that two years ago or was it three now?

[B]

It might have been three.

[A]

It was a while ago.

[B]

For those of you listening, welcome back. This podcast was supposed to start, like, nine months earlier than it actually did.

[A]

Truth.

[B]

We had, like, worked together, I think, for like, a year or two at that point. And, like, we're ready to do a.

[A]

Pod 20, 23, something like that.

[B]

Yeah. And, like, you know, the very smart people we are, we're like, let's start recording in Q4. Like, that'll be a good time for us.

[A]

Let's launch a podcast during the busiest time of the year.

[B]

And I think we, like, we each canceled on each other a couple times, and I think I forget who DM'd who first, but one of us was like, hey, like, I'm not doing all right. I'm so stressed.

[A]

Oh, my God, Yes. I remember this.

[B]

And then the other one was like, yo, me too. Like, that's like, thanks.

[A]

I'm having panic attacks as well. So.

[B]

Yeah. So for this episode, as we approach bfcm, we want to try to calm your nerves a little bit, try to give you some tactical and practical advice on how to limit stress and anxiety. This bfcm in this Q4, does that sound like a good episode?

[A]

I feel like it. Yes. It's. It's going to be necessary. Especially this year. I don't know. And this is tough because I get on Twitter constantly and I see the conversations that people are having. And this year in particular, a lot of people are talking about the fact that this Black Friday just feels meh. Like, the stress is always there during Q4 because all of us have way too much to do and not enough time to do it. But I've seen lots of posts about people talking very definitively about this one sucks for some reason. I think I know why, but I'll let.

[B]

Well, we'll. We can do that next episode, but let's go back and forth on tips how to chill out for the next.

[A]

Okay. Yes. You have, like, one to start? Because I have one.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, go ahead. You do.

[B]

So a couple things. For the last couple of years, I've been taking, like, a monthly. Sometimes more often than that, but like, a monthly journal. That's, like, how I'm feeling about the business. Oh.

[A]

And fascinating.

[B]

Every single year, this time of year, it goes through the same thing.

[A]

I have no idea. You did this. This is amazing. Oh, my gosh. Okay.

[B]

Like, November 1st comes around, and, like, we're excited, and then we get to, like, the 15th, and, like, sales aren't really there yet. And I'm like, I'm freaking out. I think I need a new job. This sucks. Like, everything. Yeah.

[A]

It's a quick onset.

[B]

And then every year by December 1st, I'm like, BFCM ripped. So what I want you guys to kind of, like, acknowledge is a couple of things. One, you're probably going to have a good Black Friday.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, Yep. People spend money. There's one thing you should bet on. It is American consumers spending money even if they don't have it. Yeah. I think, like, if you are really stressing about performance, just limit your downside. Like, just don't get aggressive. Don't try to go crazy. Trust that the wave of buyers is coming. But I guess to sum up, tip one is like, zoom out. This happens every single year.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

You're probably always feeling exactly how you feel right now this time of year, and you survived, so you'll be all right.

[A]

Yes. Okay. So your. Your tip kind of leads into my tip. I have sticky notes.

[B]

Nice.

[A]

And my sticky notes have two goals on them. Everybody's probably got their own, like, how. I don't know, like, system for how they do their to do lists. But I don't do to do lists visually, mostly because I know too much about the human brain. And it's not good for your human brain to see a to do list that has 80 things on it. Please, dear God, don't make to do that way. You're gonna do to do lists. Five things tops. The brain really can't handle more than maybe seven items in a list, and that's studied heavily. So to do lists that you have to be so careful with what's on there and how intense it is. And this is the reason why I have a goal list in front of me and nothing else, because I want to make sure whatever I put on that to do list fits that goal. If my goal this week is to make 50 ads for black Friday, which I don't suggest you do, but if that's my list, it's like, I have all this different stuff I got to do. You need to break that list down into the key goals that are going to get you there first.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Start with your top level goals.

[B]

Love that list.

[A]

Only seven things on your to do list. Please be careful what gets on there, and then don't add to it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Even if something critical comes up, be careful.

[B]

This is actually, like. This is, like, good marketing advice too. Like, now's the time to keep it.

[A]

Simple, slow down, keep it simple, do.

[B]

Less, Do A few things. Really? Well, I Talked to Connor McDonald on my podcast this and he, he has a list of 103 things but it's for next year. Like he is having the discipline. I was like, to be like, there's a bunch of stuff that we could do. And he's like, I'm sure a couple of these, like I could rush through for my team before bfcm. But he's like, it's not needed. These are all going to map to larger goals for next year. We'll consolidate them. Yeah, I love that. Five things max on your to do list for the next week. All right. Those are two, like good, like practical, like marketing advice ones. I've got just like a life one.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Go outside, get some fresh air and sunlight.

[A]

You don't need to be in air conditioning so much.

[B]

Warm enough out. Go play golf, get bare feet on the ground, do some grounding.

[A]

I love this one.

[B]

I cannot tell you guys like what a half hour outside does for me mentally.

[A]

Like, oh, life changing. Yes. Especially if you can get outside and you like, it's still decent. Like in Colorado, it's pretty cold and rainy today, so being outside would suck. But in general, just move outside your office.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Even it's just like maybe you go work at a coffee shop today because I know a lot of you are remote. If you're constantly isolated in your own space, you believe your brain starts to get in this weird mode of like being around people or other things is kind of jarring. You should not get to that point. Please go and be a part of the world for a little bit.

[B]

Love that. That actually goes into my next one. So I'm not even going to let you go yet. Plan a fun thing. Like I'm going to a concert tonight. This guy, Corey Smith, he's like a real underground country artist. He's like 50, but he rips. He's so dope.

[A]

I love those like, kind of like micro artists because they're, they're following. They're small enough still that it's just like so fun to go see them in person.

[B]

I've seen them like six times. It's always a party. I'm pumped. But plan something. And I, I think like three hours is like a good time for like an event. Just go do something. Put your, your phone away. I'm not even gonna bring this one. I've got two phones, like work phone to stay at home. It's just like, forget about it. There's nothing I can do for three hours on a Friday. That's really gonna make us revenue for next week. So just forget it.

[A]

These are so good. This is good reminder for me because this week I've been heads freaking down. I got a lot of big plans for 2026, and so I'm doing 2026 planning. And I'm like, I'm so tired. Okay, so my next top tip for this. This is going to sound weird, but get yourself food treats. Food treats in particular, because food is a very good dopamine increaser and oxytocin, like, lots of serotonin. Food is just critical for the human body. Don't go overboard, obviously, because we're in the holidays. So I don't want you guys to go in, like, sugar coma. But I typically set myself a goal for the week that is not monetary, revenue based or any sort of, like, success crazy level. I'll set a goal of, like, I want to make sure that I stand up at least once an hour.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then I'll track it on my phone. And as long as I hit that goal level, then I will get like a bowl of starburst. And I'm like, I get one. I get one pink one. Because the pink one's the best. Get yourself a train. Yeah, go. Go celebrate your successes that are not connected to revenue.

[B]

I'm big on, like, treat theory. Oh, I. I take too, too much advantage of it. But, like, it should be once in a while. It's a good thing.

[A]

It's so important for you to celebrate you because as a media buyer, creative strategist, cmo. I mean, I have friends right now that I can't even get a hold of because they're so overloaded and they've got so many things that they're trying to pick up. I'm just like, guys, you've got to celebrate when you do something that's good for you. It's so critical to maintain your mental health during this time of the year. Because otherwise to freaking Nate. Nice point at three years ago. What was that? I mean, you and I were having panic attacks at this time.

[B]

It's not good.

[A]

Like, look at how much better we're doing.

[B]

Doing great.

[A]

We haven't had a panic.

[B]

No, I haven't had one in a long time. I'm better. I'm fixed. So check it out.

[A]

Jesus. But yeah, this is what I'm saying. Nate and I have put in the work to try and make sure that we don't experience that again. So if you are a person in the D2C industry, an operator and you're experiencing this. You gotta try to make sure that you get some time and some success, like indicators.

[B]

All right, I've got one more. Okay. That is gonna be surprising coming from.

[A]

Okay, okay.

[B]

If you are stressed about bfcm, do not drink alcohol until it's over.

[A]

Oh, and this is coming from somebody who loves his.

[B]

Trust me. Yeah, I feel that that's legit for. So three years ago is actually when I started doing sober Q4s.

[A]

Yes. I remember this. Yeah.

[B]

Because I was like, I knew this was just like a super high stress time for me. I get that hangover anxiety super bad. So I was like, I'm not gonna do it. This Q4 I'm drinking because this brand isn't really big on Black Friday. And I. I went like the whole summer sober because we were pregnant.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I didn't want to be drunk from that. Anyways, I'm gonna booze up at the concert tonight. But advice for you guys, if you are stressed about BFCM, hang on with the alcohol. Hold on. December 2nd.

[A]

Is that it? Should we do more?

[B]

Do you have more?

[A]

That was a decent list. I mean, that's pretty much what I'm focused on.

[B]

That's pretty good. Yeah. Just listen. Don't do anything in the next week that, like, you would regret. Like, don't go crazy aggressive. If you just kind of sit back and chill, you will stack cash in the next 10 days. Like, there's. I'm. I'm guaranteeing it. If you didn't do anything else in your business for the rest of the year, you would make more money in the next 30 days than you did in the prior one.

[A]

So perspective, people. We're not saving lives. Okay. We're running out.

[B]

Yeah. Also just kind of realize that none of this matters. And, like, somehow we make a living sitting in air conditioned offices, clicking buttons on a laptop, and money goes into our bank account. It's magic what we do.

[A]

So, like, be okay, everyone.

[B]

Just enjoy it.

[A]

Just do it. Yeah. Hopefully this helps you guys. This is a short episode, but sometimes those are good. Like, we appreciate you guys listening. We're gonna keep chatting it up. Providing all kinds of weird things about science, psychology, and B to C and e. Commerce in 2026.

[B]

Yeah. We appreciate you guys letting us take a break from the usual thing here, but we think it's important. All right, last bonus tip. Hold on. Get yourself a friend in the industry.

[A]

Yes. Especially someone you could text and be like, oh, my God, I can't even believe this happened. And someone you could be like, guess what I did this week that's amazing. We both find some friends, people. Be careful with your mental health. Keep track of it. Doing great. Everybody's doing great.

[B]

Thanks for listening to Brain Driven Brands. We'll see you next time.

[A]

Thank you so much for joining us on the show today. Appreciate you guys listening. If you want to follow me, I'm Sarah Levenger. Anywhere you consume content, he is aatelagos. If you like this show and if you like this episode, go ahead and like subscribe, share with a friend. Drop us a review when you have a minute. We would appreciate it. Otherwise, have a great week. We'll see you next time.