In this episode of Breaking the Rules, we do something a little different — we guide you through a live experiential exercise used in therapy to demonstrate how Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) actually feels in the moment.

Using a simple jelly bean (or Mentos), we walk through an exercise that highlights one of the most important lessons in OCD treatment: the urge to escape discomfort can be powerful, but it can also be tolerated.

Through this exercise, we explore how quickly the mind and body react to discomfort, how intrusive thoughts and urges show up, and how reconnecting with meaning and values can shift our relationship with those experiences.

Experiential exercises like this are commonly used in ACT, DBT, and ERP therapy because they allow people to learn through doing, rather than just talking about the skills intellectually.

In this episode we discuss:

What experiential exercises are and why they are powerful in therapy
Why learning skills during calm moments is different from using them during triggers
The Mentos (or jelly bean) exercise used to simulate urge surfing and response prevention
What happens in the mind and body when discomfort rises
Intrusive thoughts, urges, and the instinct to escape discomfort
The role of meaning and values in increasing distress tolerance
Why acceptance changes our relationship to discomfort, not the discomfort itself
How clinicians can use this exercise with clients, families, and teen group.

🔖 Chapters

00:00 Introduction – Doing Something Different Today

02:00 What Is an Experiential Exercise?

04:00 Why Experiential Learning Matters in ERP

06:00 The Mentos (Jelly Bean) Exercise Begins

08:00 Surfing the Urge to Swallow

10:00 Intrusive Thoughts and Rising Discomfort

11:30 Debrief: What Happened During the Exercise

14:00 Acceptance and Changing Your Relationship to Discomfort

16:00 Intrusive Thoughts, Images, and Urges

18:00 Using This Exercise With Clients and Families

20:00 Teaching ERP Through Experience

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What Exposure Therapy Actually Feels Like (The Mentos/Jelly Bean Exercise)