FULL SHOW: Holiday Men Hack Date, Jose’s Midnight Meet Up + Smaller is Better for Jeff (12/10/25)

Summary

Podcast Summary: Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update

Episode: Holiday Men Hack Date, Jose’s Midnight Meet Up + Smaller is Better for Jeff (12/10/25)

Release Date: December 14, 2025
Hosts: Brooke, Jeffrey, Jose, Alexis
Main Segments: Audience shoutouts, Winter coziness tips, "Plenty of 20" holiday dish trivia, “What's On Your Mind?”, Battle of the Tinder Dates (Holiday Edition), Second Date Update (Perfume Counter Hack), Laser Stories, Win Brooks Bucks

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Overview

This episode celebrates the holiday season with the show’s signature mix of humor, relatable personal stories, inventive dating hacks, and listener interactions. Themes of winter comfort, awkward holiday dates, and unique strategies to meet new people are explored, all in the group’s candid, playful tone.

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Key Segments and Discussion Points

1. Audience Shoutouts and Winter Coziness Tips ([00:38]–[04:02])

• Listeners are recognized for hard work during the holidays, especially delivery drivers.
• Hosts share survey results about how Americans get cozy in winter:
  • Top winter comfort activities: Curling up on the couch, layering up blankets, relaxing music, and tea/hot cocoa.
  • Brooke jokes about her husband carrying candles “room to room” to boost winter coziness.
    “...They go from room to room with him. He loves candles.” —Brooke [02:23]
• Quick comedic rundown of typical winter complaints—Alexis and Jose bemoan the desire to “hibernate like a bear.”

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2. “Plenty of 20” – Holiday Dish Trivia Game Show ([04:06]–[09:55])

• Producer Jake hosts a trivia game about real and fake holiday foods from around the world.
• Notable moments:
  • Alexis is skeptical about “Christmas Coconut Meatloaf” from Brazil.
    • Alexis: “Just a bunch of coconut and a meatloaf pan?” [05:40]
  • Everyone laughs at the absurdity of "Reindeer egg custard" (Finland) and “Glowing moose pudding” (Norway).
  • Jose incorrectly guesses “Christmas pudding” (England) is fake, missing that it’s a flaming fruitcake tradition.
    • “If she didn’t eat a booze cake, I know it doesn't exist.” —Brooke [07:48]
• Winners: Brooke and Alexis. The losing team is forced to sing “Feliz Navidad” while getting shocked.
  • “I've never heard of glowing moose pudding before. But just because of Jake’s Norwegian accent, I'm gonna believe in the spirit of Christmas. Even though I’m a Jew.” —Jeffrey [08:54]

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3. What’s On Your Mind? ([11:22]–[18:40])

Roundtable segment where each host shares their recent life dilemmas, delivered with self-deprecating humor.

Brooke ([12:00]):

• Torn about saying goodbye to construction workers who renovated her home—considers inviting them on a Bulgarian vacation.
  • “I’ve done a lot of research on Bulgaria, and it looks incredible.” [13:00]

Jose ([13:37]):

• Gets a parking ticket after a 2-minute pharmacy stop, gets hit on by a car enthusiast after.
  • “He’s like, you think you could take my number down?...like at midnight, we could, like, take pictures of our cars together.” [14:55]

Alexis ([15:18]):

• Embarrassed after mixing up athletes during a cross-country banquet speech.
  • “I’m talking about how far she made it in the season...she got injured week one and was gone.” [16:00]

Jeffrey ([16:44]):

• Bought a small TV by mistake, ends up preferring it and plans to go even smaller.
  • “I actually prefer a smaller screen. I like standing up and standing close to it.” [18:03]

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4. Battle of the Tinder Dates (Holiday Edition) ([21:38]–[28:56])

Two callers, “Peppermint Lolly Molly” and “Max My Visa Lisa”, compete to share the worst holiday date stories.

Highlights:

• Molly’s stories: Guy brings her to a tree lighting in his garage, another gets stuck in her chimney.
  • “I wake up and I hear something, and it’s a guy calling out for help...my date [is] stuck in my chimney.” —Molly [25:23]
• Lisa’s stories: Gets roped into caroling at her date’s ex-girlfriend’s house.
  • “He starts singing Single Bells...that’s when I found out he does it to his ex. The one that opened the door. Every single year.” —Lisa [24:38]
• Winner: Molly, for “decorating a guy’s tree while he watched football”—a recurring user dating scam.

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5. Second Date Update: “Holiday Men Hack” – Denise & Caleb ([34:34]–[50:38])

Setting: Denise, a creative dater, works part-time at a department store perfume counter to meet single men.

Story:

• Denise’s dating hack: “I realized that around the holidays there’s a lot of [guys] around the perfume counter shopping for their moms and their sisters...” [35:41]
• She meets Caleb, a shy guy buying perfume for his mom. Denise flirts, encourages him to ask her out, and exchanges numbers.
• Caleb, hesitant to set a date, reveals he’s “waiting for the right time”—eventually confesses he’s testing beard growth supplements:
  • “I just...I think you’d like it. I have a new one coming in this week...it’s called Beard Burst.” —Caleb [48:12]
• Hosts and Denise initially misunderstand, thinking the supplements are for a much more private issue.
  • Jeffrey: “We really shouldn’t ask anymore.” [45:43]
• Denise reassures Caleb that his lack of facial hair isn’t an issue, and they agree to go on a date.
  • “If you’re on this beard journey, I will go on this journey with you.” —Denise [49:29]

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6. Laser Stories and Listener Texts ([53:11]–[61:10])

• Laser Stories: Offbeat news, including a guy caught depositing meth at a bank [54:30], Latvia’s “hourly rental husbands” [56:12], Mariah Carey’s annual $2.5 million royalties for “All I Want for Christmas” [58:16].
• Listener texts: Heartwarming and humorous interactions—e.g., a listener with 4 boys discovers she’s pregnant with a fifth child.
  • “Dude, I just read a thing that, like, once you have a couple of the same gender, then they keep coming out that way.” —Brooke [19:59]

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7. Win Brooks Bucks ([61:21]–[66:53])

• A holiday-themed trivia contest between Brooke and a caller, Cody (who’s still seeking revenge after a loss the previous year).
• Fun banter about mall job perks, retail secrets, secret handshakes, and the group’s tradition of poking fun at Brooke’s “evil corporate owner” persona.
  • “Do the tickle…” —Brooke on the secret mall handshake [64:16]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• Brooke, on befriending construction workers:
  “I thought maybe we could do a big family vacation...I’ve done a lot of research on Bulgaria, and it looks incredible.” [13:00]
• Jose’s ticket scenario:
  “He’s like, can I take a picture of your car? ... Like at midnight, we could, like, take pictures of our cars together.” [14:55]
• Jeffrey’s TV confession:
  “Even the guy hanging it was like, are you sure you want to do this? I could probably just hang this with masking tape.” [17:32]
• Molly’s “chimney” date:
  “I find my...my date stuck in my chimney. He was trying to surprise me like some weird Tinder Santa.” [25:34]
• Denise’s holiday man hack:
  “I was thinking about other places that eligible single guys would be...around the holidays there’s a lot of them around the perfume counter shopping for their moms and their sisters and their aunts.” [35:41]
• Caleb’s big beard reveal:
  “It’s called Beard Burst. It’s for facial hair. Because beards are really hot right now.” [48:25]
• Brooke on listener’s pregnancy news:
  “Dude, I just read a thing that, like, once you have a couple of the same gender, then they keep coming out that way.” [19:59]
• Jake (producer) doing a Norwegian accent:
  “Tender elk pudding. It’s a neon green dessert made from moose gelatin and local berries…” [08:19]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:38] – Listener shoutouts & winter coziness tips
• [04:06] – “Plenty of 20” global dish trivia
• [11:22] – “What’s On Your Mind?”
• [21:38] – Battle of the Tinder Dates: Holiday Edition
• [34:34] – Second Date Update: “Holiday Men Hack”
• [53:11] – Laser Stories
• [61:21] – “Win Brooks Bucks” trivia game

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Recap & Takeaways

This episode captures the holiday chaos, humor, and empathy that defines Brooke and Jeffrey. From crowdsourced dating hacks (perfume counter strategy), to disastrous-yet-hilarious Tinder stories, through self-deprecating holiday mishaps, the gang keeps the show relatable, funny, and surprisingly touching at times. The Second Date Update remains a highlight for its unexpected twist (beard supplements!), and holiday Battle of the Tinder Dates delivers plenty of cringe-laughs.

For listeners:

• Looking for new places to meet people? Check out “man hacks” like the perfume counter (though results may vary!).
• Embarrassing holiday dates are universal—sometimes the best therapy is sharing them with strangers on the radio.
• Winter is best spent bundled up, with a hot drink, and maybe a much smaller TV than you planned.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Brooke]

Hey, full show is here and it's brand new. Yeah. Welcome to the podcast. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning and I may be creeping some construction workers out. I don't think maybe is the hey question, Alexis. It wasn't supposed to be.

[Alexis]

Maybe Brooke is. Or is it?

[Jose]

I don't think it matters the job site either. I could see you driving by a construction site and you creep them out.

[Brooke]

I'm cat calling. Yeah, yeah, leave us alone, lady. Yeah, for sure. Jose got an offer to meet up at midnight from a complete stranger.

[Jose]

Yeah, it's a weird story.

[Alexis]

It's a.

[Brooke]

What's on your mind today? Plus, we got a brand new second date update. We just got a lot of fun for you, but we want to start always with your comments.

[Alexis]

Yes, Selena commented. So a little while ago we did a shot caller on highest stress jobs.

[Brooke]

Oh, yeah, that's right.

[Alexis]

And Selena said. This is my first time ever making a comment, but I would like to add USPS workers, high stress job.

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Alexis]

There's a reason the saying is going postal, especially this time of year. Any sort of Delivery driver like UPS, FedEx, Amazon, etc. Should make a list. So I thought we should give them a nice shout out.

[Brooke]

Absolutely. Absolutely. Thank you. Thank you so much.

[Jose]

Thank you so much. Any delivery drivers out there?

[Alexis]

I am doing so much online shopping. I'm sorry in advance.

[Brooke]

Thanks, guys.

[Jose]

Friends that are like managers at Amazon that are complaining every day and I'm.

[Jeffrey]

Like, yeah, that sucks.

[Jose]

One day shipping.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jose]

Sorry, guys.

[Jeffrey]

Thank you.

[Brooke]

Thank you so much. Hopefully this lessens your stress a little bit. A full hour starts right now.

[Jeffrey]

Winter has arrived early in parts of the U.S. oh, boy. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning, like I.

[Jose]

Snowstorms.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, that's.

[Brooke]

Jeez. That's what winter is.

[Jeffrey]

It's got a lot of people wanting to curl up into a ball and set their alarms for March. Cause In a survey, 66% of Americans say they wish they could hibernate like a bear all the way through winter into springtime, you know, after Christmas.

[Jose]

I agree. I love Christmas, but once it hits January, like, lock me up.

[Brooke]

I love skiing. So I don't want to hibernate, but I do want to do all the preparation for hibernation. Yeah, yeah, I see.

[Jeffrey]

You don't need permission to do that, but how would Americans accomplish that? Well, people were given 20 options to be as cozy as possible, and these were the top ones. They selected the most popular ways people like to get cozy in the wintertime.

[Jose]

I love this list.

[Jeffrey]

Number 7. Is lighting some candles.

[Brooke]

Yeah. My husband, he carries candles around with him around the house. Yeah. They go from room to room with him. He loves candles.

[Jeffrey]

Number six, not leaving the house.

[Denise]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Number five, sleeping in late. Hey, it's a good way to get cozy. These are the most popular ways people like to get cozy in the winter.

[Jose]

Do y' all ever sleep in and then wake up and, like, go back to sleep for 30 more minutes? You're like, that was extra time before I had children.

[Brooke]

That was cute.

[Jose]

Oh, yeah, sorry.

[Jeffrey]

Number four, hopping on tinder.

[Brooke]

What? That's how you're getting cozy.

[Alexis]

You don't want to leave your house. It's kind of counter.

[Jeffrey]

I'm just kidding.

[Jose]

Yeah, right.

[Jeffrey]

I'm just kidding. It's a cup of tea or hot cocoa.

[Brooke]

Oh, there we go.

[Jeffrey]

Much more cozy.

[Brooke]

I'll swipe right on that, Jeff.

[Jeffrey]

Number three, layers of blankets.

[Brooke]

Yeah. Heavier the better.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah. Number two, Putting on relaxing music. Like this holiday reach for the sky. So cozy. All right, enough of that. Enough of that garbage. And the number one way people like to get cozy during winter is by curling up on the couch.

[Jose]

And if you can do as many combos as all that with the heavy.

[Brooke]

Blankets and the couch and the tea and.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, my God, Then you could actually hibernate for seven months. So good luck. Just barely. Not making the list is hearing radio idiots get electrocuted with a dog shock collar, along with the soothing sound of our digital producer asking us some tricky questions.

[Jose]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

So, Jake, soothe us the way only you know how.

[Jake]

Oh, I had 20 ways to get cozy. I gotta throw this away. Let's see. Okay, let me think. It's Christmas time.

[Denise]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah.

[Jake]

Not just in America, but all over the world.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jake]

They're celebrating Yuletide from Tokyo to Toledo, from Smallville to Whoville.

[Jose]

Aw, cute.

[Jake]

And every country has their own unique holiday traditions, Especially when it comes to festive foods. Like, for example, in Japan, they treat fried chicken like a traditional Christmas feast.

[Brooke]

Isn't that cool?

[Jake]

Thanks to a marketing campaign in the 1970s that convinced everybody that fried chicken is what Americans eat on December 25th.

[Jose]

No, we eat it every other day of the year.

[Brooke]

No, I'd be down for that on December 25th.

[Jake]

Yeah, but could you tell the difference between a real holiday dish from overseas and one I just made up?

[Jeffrey]

Probably not.

[Jake]

That's your challenge today. During a special global dish or total ish edition of plenty of 20, you say a number one through 20. I'll give you a country along with a unique holiday meal. They enjoy you just have to tell me if that's a real global dish or just some made up total ish. Let's start with the woman whose idea of an international treat is a bowl of Mac and cheese with Fiji water.

[Jeffrey]

Alexis exotics.

[Brooke]

Top tier seven.

[Jake]

Number seven. Alexis, your holiday meal comes from Brazil and it's called Christmas coconut meatloaf. It's a loaf shaped block made entirely of shredded coconut pressed together like it's trying to pretend it's a protein. Brazilians serve it at Christmas because it's the only dish that doesn't melt in the heat. Most tourists say it tastes like dessert that lost its way. Is that a real global dish or international ish?

[Brooke]

Interesting.

[Alexis]

Just a bunch of coconut and a meatloaf pan.

[Brooke]

I kind of. I'm picturing a. What are those called? A fruit.

[Jose]

Fruit cake.

[Brooke]

Fruit cake.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah.

[Alexis]

But to not milk. Coconut does get mushy, doesn't it?

[Brooke]

I'd go for some coconut cake on a beach.

[Jose]

Coconut meat cake.

[Jeffrey]

I don't know.

[Brooke]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Alexis]

I'm gonna say fake.

[Jake]

Alexis says that's ish. That is international ish. Brooke, we're over to you. Seven is off the board.

[Brooke]

Give me eight.

[Caleb]

Number eight.

[Jake]

Brooke, your holiday meal comes from the magical land of Finland and the food is reindeer egg custard. It's a baked creamy holiday flan supposedly made from the mythical winter eggs that reindeer leave in the snow.

[Jose]

Oh, reindeer don't lay eggs, bro.

[Jake]

That's why they're mythical.

[Brooke]

That's what I didn't know. Jose, I'm so glad you told me.

[Jose]

I just figured it out.

[Jake]

Of course reindeer don't lay eggs, but the story is that families collect these frost covered gems on Christmas Eve, then eat them with their hands for good luck. Is this a real global dish or international?

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, only rabbits lay eggs on Easter. That's the true Christmas tradition.

[Brooke]

Jeff, I'm so confused. Like, what is the dish exactly?

[Jake]

Reindeer egg custard. Custard.

[Jose]

So they make an egg custard and then they just say it's.

[Brooke]

It's a reindeer egg custard.

[Jeffrey]

It doesn't sound fake.

[Brooke]

Well, the egg custard would be legit.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

And that's a cute story. I mean, I don't know. Why are they not just eating the reindeer in Finland? Like that's my whole thing.

[Jeffrey]

That's not magical sound.

[Jose]

That sounds delicious.

[Brooke]

I'm going to say total ish.

[Jake]

Brooks says total ish. Yeah, that one up. But Brooke did say it was cute, so I'll take That as a compliment, Jose. 7 and 8 are off the board.

[Jose]

12.

[Jake]

Jose. In England, they have something called Christmas pudding. It's a heavy fruitcake soaked in booze, and they light it on fire before serving it. The flame is supposed to represent bringing light into the dark winter, but mostly it's to distract you from the fact that it weighs as much as a bowling ball.

[Jose]

Oh, my God.

[Jake]

Is this a real global dish or international ish?

[Brooke]

I could see this.

[Jose]

Alexis, you've been out there a bunch. You know?

[Denise]

Have you heard of this?

[Alexis]

Did not eat this.

[Jose]

You didn't eat this.

[Brooke]

If she didn't eat a booze cake, I mean, I know it doesn't exist. That's actually going on.

[Jose]

You're so right. I'm gonna say this is a bunch of total ish.

[Jake]

Jose says ish. No, that's dish.

[Alexis]

I was surprised if a booze cake.

[Jeffrey]

That's a real one.

[Jose]

It's probably super bougie. Yeah.

[Jake]

Speaking of flav. Flaming fruitcakes. Jeffrey, we're over to you.

[Jeffrey]

Okay, give me number five.

[Jake]

Number five. Your holiday treat is from Norway, and it's called glowing moose pudding. Or as the locals call it. Let's see how I do this.

[Jeffrey]

Look.

[Jake]

Tender elk pudding. It's a neon green dessert made from moose gelatin and local berries, supposedly glowing to guide Santa through the long polar night. Families eat it after the main meal to light up the holidays, though it mostly makes everyone light up their porcelain thrones in the restroom. Is it a real global dish or international ish?

[Jeffrey]

Huh? First of all, your Norwegian accent, flawless, Jamie.

[Jose]

Oh, so good, dude.

[Alexis]

Thanks.

[Jose]

You gotta have.

[Brooke]

Norway listeners are probably like, I didn't know the show was local.

[Jeffrey]

I know.

[Jake]

Tender elk pudding.

[Jose]

Is there a Viking on the radio?

[Jeffrey]

It's so impressive. I've never heard of glowing moose pudding before. But just because of Jake's Norwegian accent, I'm gonna believe in the spirit of Christmas. Even though I'm a Jew. I'm gonna say this is real global dish. Don't let me down, Jake.

[Jake]

Jeffrey says global dish.

[Jeffrey]

I've let him down again.

[Jake]

I'm sorry, Jeffrey.

[Brooke]

Never trust the accent.

[Jake]

The ladies have won today's edition of plenty of 20.

[Jeffrey]

All right, well, the girls get to choose who gets shocked, and they're going to be singing Feliz Navidad by Jose Feliciano.

[Brooke]

I wanted you to sing Reach for the Stars, but fine, fine. Can we do a double shock of both of you?

[Jose]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Just because Christmas.

[Jose]

Okay, Feliz Navidad.

[Jeffrey]

We need the trumpet.

[Jake]

Trumpet sounds.

[Jeffrey]

That was Your shock collar. Question of the day. Or how do they say it in Norway?

[Jake]

Jake, look. Tender shock collar.

[Jeffrey]

We're going to do phone tap. Coming up right after this.

[Brooke]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[Jeffrey]

Have you guys ever thought about what our show is gonna look like 50 years from now?

[Brooke]

Oh my God, Jeff.

[Jose]

Whoa. Do not do 50.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, it's crazy to think that we're still gonna be on the radio.

[Jose]

Totally, dude. Radio will exist.

[Brooke]

I don't think that's gonna be it.

[Jose]

Come on guys.

[Jeffrey]

In future phone taps, we're just gonna be prank calling people's Alexas and their smart fridges.

[Brooke]

I thought we were just gonna dial straight into their brains.

[Jeffrey]

We might.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Jose and Alexis are gonna have to fly out for whatcha doing at the Costco Gr.

[Brooke]

That's fun.

[Jeffrey]

That'll be a fun trip.

[Jose]

This guy's got a real thick Martian accent.

[Brooke]

I don't think we'll have to fly.

[Alexis]

I think we could teleport.

[Jose]

Oh yeah, that's an even better point.

[Brooke]

And we'll still be upset about the muffins changing.

[Jeffrey]

Definitely. And with attention span shrinking so quickly, we won't have time to do our next segment. What's on your mind? Oh, we'll just have a button that telepathically sends listeners all our thoughts as you sleep.

[Jose]

That's not going to be good.

[Brooke]

You don't want all of them.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, you're gonna get them. So until we get to that point, try to enjoy us sharing our lives the fashioned way by talking them into microphones so ancient. It's during a brand new what's on your mind coming up right now.

[Jake]

It's broken.

[Jeffrey]

Jeffrey in the morning. And I just hate it when people act all intellectual and talk about Mozart when they've never even seen one of his paintings before. Okay, it's not.

[Brooke]

Okay, you tell him, John.

[Jeffrey]

We don't pretend to be intellectual.

[Jose]

Okay?

[Jeffrey]

Not even close. No, we just go around the room and share the low brow thoughts that we've all been thinking about lately. Yeah, we're bro Sophistication guaranteed. Starting with Brooke. Brooke, what's on your mind?

[Brooke]

Fuck that, Jeffrey.

[Jeffrey]

Art slam.

[Brooke]

So I haven't talked about it, but at the beginning of August we started a big renovation on our house, which we feel really fortunate for.

[Jose]

Oh yeah.

[Brooke]

And we hired this company and these two guys run this company and they, they have been incredible. Incredible, right? So much so that they're there every morning at 7. Like on the weekends. I'm like, do you want coffee and bagels? Like we've We've started to really fall in love with them.

[Jeffrey]

I'll take a back massage if you're offering.

[Brooke]

My daughter has Christmas gift ideas for them. Right. They're like, part of our family, which is fantastic, except for construction is wrapping up.

[Caleb]

Oh, no.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, no.

[Brooke]

Exactly.

[Jose]

You have to find them projects.

[Brooke]

I'm having anxiety about them leaving, and so I'm wondering. Wondering, is it weird to try to be friends with them?

[Jeffrey]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Afterwards. Like, I was thinking that maybe we could invite them over for dinner. I want to meet their babies.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, wow.

[Brooke]

They're from Bulgaria. I thought maybe we could do a big family vacation.

[Alexis]

Oh, wow.

[Brooke]

I've done a lot of research on Bulgaria, and it looks incredible.

[Jose]

They could be a tour guide.

[Denise]

They could translate.

[Brooke]

That's what I'm saying.

[Jeffrey]

I would love to see the looks on their faces, though, when you ask if you could go with them to Bulgaria to meet their families.

[Brooke]

Am I crossing a line?

[Alexis]

I'm talking to them and hear if they're excited for this project to be over.

[Jeffrey]

Invite them to be a part of your family, Brooke. I think you should do it and see how it goes.

[Jose]

Start with dinner. They say, let's come. You want to come over for a.

[Brooke]

Nice Christmas dinner, That's okay, right?

[Jose]

And then see how that goes.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Alexis]

I don't know if okay is the word, but it's something.

[Brooke]

Guys, I like them so much.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, we can tell. Jose, what's been on your mind?

[Jose]

Well, I live in downtown in the city.

[Denise]

Right.

[Jose]

And parking is always an adventure for me, and I want to go do stuff.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Yeah.

[Jose]

So anyway, I was gonna go stop at the pharmacy, and next door there's a burger place.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Jose]

And the pharmacy parking lot's full. It's a small place. So I'm like, I'm gonna park in a little burger lot.

[Brooke]

See, Brooke already knows that gives me anxiety.

[Jose]

You guys already get it, right? So, anyway, so I park for, like, literally two minutes, no more than three. I come out. There is immediately a parking enforcement ticket on my windshield. And I don't know how, because I truly was so quick. Guys. Like, I'm truly. I've never been so shocked. I sit in my car. Immediately somebody comes up, knocks on my. My door.

[Brooke]

Oh, they're there.

[Denise]

Oh.

[Jose]

I roll my window down. The guy's like, hey, I'm. I'm the guy that gave you the ticket. I just want to say, like, I am so sorry. You look so upset.

[Jeffrey]

I wonder why.

[Caleb]

What?

[Jose]

He's like, I saw you looking around, and, like, I didn't know you were going to be that fast, or I would have waited. I, I, I didn't know.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, that's what all your dates say to you, too. That was so fast.

[Jose]

That's so true.

[Jeffrey]

Didn't expect that.

[Jose]

And I'm just like, what? And he's like, by the way, I really. Can I take a picture of your car? And I go, what? And he goes, I'm new to town. I'm a car enthusiast. I drive the Beamer over there. There's like, an old Beamer, like, with, like, mismatched parts on it.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah.

[Jose]

He's like, you think you could take my number down? And then, like, sometime, like, like at midnight, we could, like, go through the city and, like, take pictures of our cars together.

[Brooke]

Midnight, you know?

[Jose]

I was like, no, thank you very much. So I paid $85 for two minutes of parking in the pharmacy.

[Alexis]

Dude, should have bought fries.

[Jose]

Maybe I still can.

[Alexis]

I don't know.

[Jeffrey]

Alexis, what's been on your mind?

[Alexis]

So this past fall, I was helping coach high school cross country.

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Alexis]

And then as the season came to an end, we had the end of season banquet, and I had to do what I hate most, and that's public speaking at the banquet.

[Jeffrey]

Good thing you don't do it for your job.

[Brooke]

I know, I know.

[Alexis]

No, and nothing's worse than high schoolers and their parents in one room with me talking.

[Jeffrey]

But you did it.

[Alexis]

I did it. But I tried to, like, prep. Like, I asked some of the kids I'd talk about, and I looked up them times they ran the season, their best, whatever. So I'm up there talking, and at one point, I'm talking about one of the girls and how well she's done. And I'm getting really specific when I look into the audience and I see her shaking her head no, and I'm like, no, that's weird. And I, like, finish, and then I go look at my notes after talking about the wrong kid.

[Jose]

Oh, no, serious.

[Alexis]

I'm talking about how far she made it in the season, all this. Got injured week one and was gone.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Alexis]

Tough times. I finished and I'm like, okay, I'm done, at least.

[Jose]

And you made it far across the room.

[Lisa]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Alexis]

After your injury, the kids go up after and they're talking about the coaches now. And I'm like, oh, this will be good. Every coach, you know, they're like, they run with us. They're so inspirational, motivational. It gets to me. And they're like, so Coach Alexis, she always has a lot of stories she.

[Brooke]

Tells.

[Alexis]

She talks a lot on our runs.

[Jeffrey]

Big imagination on that.

[Alexis]

Period over. Everyone claps and everyone like, huh.

[Brooke]

That wasn't a compliment.

[Alexis]

Might have to call it sick on the banquet next year.

[Brooke]

Good job, Jeffrey. What's on your mind?

[Jeffrey]

Six months ago I made a big purchase. At least like I thought it was. I went online to one of those big electronic stores. I won't say which one, but I bought a brand new smart tv.

[Brooke]

Whoa. That's a huge purchase.

[Jeffrey]

When it showed up, I realized I hadn't paid close enough attention to the details.

[Jose]

Oh no.

[Jeffrey]

Cause it was about half the size that I expected it to be.

[Caleb]

Is it?

[Brooke]

That's the only detail I want look at is how many inches big.

[Jose]

That's like the biggest part.

[Jeffrey]

They put so many numbers though. I'm like, which number am I supposed to pay attention to?

[Brooke]

Like you thought you were getting like a 60 inch TV and you got a 30 inch.

[Jeffrey]

It was pretty small.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Jeffrey]

It goes in my living room right above the main fireplace. You can imagine, big fireplace, large empty wall, tiny tv.

[Brooke]

You could have just returned it and got the right size.

[Jeffrey]

Even the guy hanging it was like, are you sure you want to do this? The guy was like, I could probably just hang this with masking tape. We don't need a whole like bracket. But I was like, just do it. I'm just going to ride this out. Fast forward to present day.

[Denise]

Okay.

[Jeffrey]

It stopped working.

[Brooke]

The TV in six months. There's got to be some warranty on this.

[Jeffrey]

It can't locate the WI fi signal in my house. So the tech people came out, they can't figure it out. I have to replace it now.

[Jose]

Oh no.

[Jeffrey]

And I realized I actually prefer a smaller screen.

[Brooke]

You do?

[Jose]

Is that what you do on your.

[Jeffrey]

I like standing up and standing close to it. Cuz I feel like less of a couch potato that way.

[Jose]

Yeah. The Michael Scott TV from that one episode.

[Brooke]

And you can't turn on closed captions cuz they're too small to read.

[Jeffrey]

They're too small unless I'm wearing my glasses.

[Jose]

Binoculars.

[Jeffrey]

That feels good.

[Brooke]

You're going to get it even smaller.

[Jeffrey]

For my next one. I'm going even smaller. I'm thinking 24 inches right above the fireplace.

[Jose]

Smaller than my gaming monitor in my stream.

[Alexis]

You should just use an iPad at this point.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, it's a good idea. Do they mount those up on your wall?

[Brooke]

I think that's where the duct tape coming.

[Jeffrey]

Oh man. I'm gonna invite you guys over for a party.

[Brooke]

Can't wait.

[Jeffrey]

It's Gonna be banging. That's what's on our minds. You can text in 78592 and tell us what's been on yours.

[Brooke]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[Jeffrey]

It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. We just shared what's been on our minds. And the listeners, so loyal, texting into 78592, telling us what's been on theirs. This one says, good morning, Brooke, Alexis, Jose and Jeffrey. Have a great Friday from Caitlyn in Tennessee.

[Brooke]

Hey, way to go, Caitlyn.

[Jeffrey]

Caitlyn, you know, you're identifying yourself publicly here. Oh, your friends are going to mock you when they find out you listen to our show. What are you doing to yourself?

[Brooke]

Oh, no, she didn't put her last name.

[Alexis]

And they'd have to be listening also to hear this.

[Jeffrey]

How many Caitlyn's could there be in Tennessee?

[Jose]

Every Caitlyn in Tennessee just lost all their friends.

[Caleb]

Yes.

[Jeffrey]

No street cred for Caitlyn. Another says, hello, my name is Reynaldo and I'm a big fan of the second date update and would like to contact Brooke and Jeffrey for a second date update.

[Brooke]

Hey, that's so cool. You can do that on our way website.

[Jeffrey]

Jose, you know you're not allowed to request second dates through your phone, Tate, so. That's not me. It's too weird. Another one says, not sure when's what's on your mind, but what's on my mind is that I have four little boys ages one through seven, and just found out I'm pregnant with baby number five.

[Brooke]

Oh, what a nightmare.

[Jeffrey]

What are the odds it's another boy?

[Brooke]

Dude, I just read a thing that, like, once you have a couple of the same gender, then they keep coming out that way.

[Jeffrey]

Why is that? I feel like that is science. I don't know, like a little boy factor.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Brooke, would you. Would you be willing to do a gender reveal? Like with a corn dog? Maybe for her, if the wiener's in blue inside, it's a boy.

[Brooke]

Or if the thing's hollow, then you know it's a girl.

[Jeffrey]

All right, we'll. We'll put together something for you, but yeah, that's what we do. More weirdness after this.

[Brooke]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[Jeffrey]

Let's talk about the perks of being single during the holidays, okay? It's gonna be good for you, Jeff. Yeah, no one talks about this enough. Cuz, obviously no need to go gift shopping, so you save a ton of money.

[Brooke]

Okay?

[Jake]

Yeah.

[Jose]

You still got all my presents for.

[Denise]

All your friends and family?

[Jeffrey]

Yep. You don't have to embarrass yourself trying to ice skate together in a big crowded rink full of screaming children.

[Brooke]

True, true.

[Jeffrey]

But that doesn't. Cute. And of course you have free reign to shamelessly flirt with all the hot 70 year old mall Santas you want.

[Brooke]

Hey. What? Hey, how you doing?

[Jeffrey]

Oh, yeah, I guess even if you're not single, you can try, but they.

[Brooke]

Think they're not doing that.

[Jose]

I love that both you and the Monsanta are drunk.

[Jeffrey]

But maybe the best part of being single for the holidays is you can go out on as many festive dates as you want. And when they go wrong, come right onto our show to share your pain during a special holiday themed edition of Battle of the Tinder Dates. We're gonna do it coming up right after this. Two hopeless daters.

[Lisa]

One dating app that dares you to swipe right.

[Brooke]

The question is, whose love life is more trag. Jake.

[Jeffrey]

It's Battle of the Tinder Dates. It's the holly jolly game show that introduced Rudolph to a brand new type of reindeer game called Spin the bottle. Everybody wins.

[Brooke]

Get rub.

[Jose]

Right over there.

[Brooke]

Kind of innocent.

[Jeffrey]

Special holiday edition of Battle of the Tinder Dates where we hear about the least wonderful dates during the most wonderful time of the year.

[Alexis]

That's right.

[Jeffrey]

We'll explain the rules in just a second. But first, let's meet today's contestants. In this corner, she's been banned from four holiday candy stores because of the enthusiastic way she handles a candy cane.

[Jose]

Oh, my gosh.

[Jeffrey]

Meet Peppermint Lolly Molly.

[Denise]

Hello.

[Jose]

You know you don't have to eat it all at once, right?

[Brooke]

See, I feel like that she's a curbside eater only, you know, like she puts that part in her mouth first.

[Jeffrey]

She'll never reveal her secrets. And in the other corner, she actually enjoys anti answering scam calls just so she can flirt with the fraudster on the other end of the line. Meet Max. My visa. Lisa.

[Brooke]

Hello. Hello, Lisa. You need more in person dates.

[Jose]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Don't let people tell you how to live your life, Lisa. Okay, here's how long. Good. Here's how the game works. One contestant will start by telling one of their worst dating stories that happened during the holiday season. Then the other will try to counter with a nightmare story of their own. We're going back and forth for three rounds until we declare a winner. Just in time for Christmas, we're gonna kick things off with Peppermint Lolly Molly. Go for it.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Okay, so he invited me to a romantic tree lighting.

[Lisa]

Oh, cute, right?

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

So he sent me the address to meet him, and I get there, and it's his house, and it's a small fake tree in his garage.

[Brooke]

No, wait, it's not even in his living room.

[Jeffrey]

No, garages are the traditional location for holiday trees, bro.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

The rest of his family was waiting inside to meet me.

[Jeffrey]

Full of surprises.

[Brooke]

I was gonna say you didn't want to be in the garage, but now you just want to stay there?

[Jose]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Lisa, can you counter?

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Okay. A guy invited me to go caroling with him.

[Jose]

Whoa.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

He told me he does it every year.

[Jose]

Okay.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, that's a big deal for a guy to invite a lady to come singing with him. That's the highest level.

[Brooke]

Says Jeffrey. Says the karaoke king.

[Jeffrey]

Okay, so what happened?

[Brooke]

How dare you hit the high notes that I.

[Caleb]

What happened?

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

So I meet up with him, and it's just the two of us. And the first house that we go to, this woman opens the door, okay. And she's, like, my age. And he starts singing Single bells to the tune of Jingle Bells.

[Jeffrey]

I don't get it.

[Brooke]

Lonely on Christmas Day.

[Jeffrey]

Why would you sing it to.

[Jake]

Okay.

[Jeffrey]

I don't know.

[Jose]

Yeah, it's true.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

That's when I found out that he.

[Lisa]

Does it to his ex.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

The one that opened the door.

[Jose]

Oh, God.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Every single year.

[Jose]

That's brilliant.

[Brooke]

I've never seen a lone caroler. So that makes sense why he's the only one going to the one house.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, it's her fault for keeping the door open and hearing the entire thing, too. She should have just closed the door. Okay, we're on to the second round here. So peppermint lolly Molly, we're back to you.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Okay, so I had, like, a really good dinner date with this guy who is super into Christmas, which is great. So am I. And he kept talking about the magic of the holiday, and dinner was fine, and then he dropped me off. And then at 2 in the morning, I wake up and I hear something, and it's a guy calling out for help.

[Brooke]

What? Scary.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

No, it was so scary. And I'm, like, half asleep, and I don't really know what's happening, and I find my. My date stuck in my chimney.

[Brooke]

What?

[Jose]

Whoa.

[Jeffrey]

Huh? How?

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

He was trying to surprise me like some weird Tinder Santa.

[Jose]

Oh, no.

[Brooke]

I know.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Fire department. Yeah, like, it's bringing and entering, but, like, cheerfully or, I don't know, a.

[Jeffrey]

Little bit too festive for your liking. It sounds like. Lisa, we're back to you. You.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Okay, so we went to a Christmas light event, and there was a live nativity scene with actors and costumes and everything, which was cool until my date started heckling the wise men for committing to the wrong star.

[Jeffrey]

What?

[Brooke]

I don't remember that part of the story.

[Lisa]

People told them to shut up.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

They asked us to leave. They, like, escorted us out.

[Brooke]

No frankincense and myrrh for you.

[Jose]

Wait, you're telling me they blessed the wrong baby?

[Jeffrey]

The third and final round here, which means. Peppermint lolly. Molly, hit us with it.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Okay, so I was at this guy's house, and he suggested we decorate his tree together, which is so cute. I felt like I was in, like, a little Hallmark movie. And.

[Brooke]

Oh, my God, this is genius. Do you want to come over to my house on a date and put up all my decorations?

[Lisa]

Well, that was the thing.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

He just, like, watched football the whole time.

[Lisa]

No.

[Brooke]

Oh, no.

[Jose]

That's messed up.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

And so I went home, and I, like. I text him later and was like, what was that? And he admitted that he uses girls from apps to do that every year.

[Jose]

Oh, that's mean.

[Brooke]

That is not the Christmas spirit.

[Jeffrey]

But the good news is, at least he chose you this year, so that.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Didn'T feel like a win.

[Jeffrey]

It's kind of a con.

[Alexis]

You didn't have to take it down. That's worse.

[Jose]

Yeah, true.

[Jeffrey]

Okay, Max, my visa. Lisa, this is your last chance.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Okay, so I met a guy at a bar, and right when I get there, he pulls out mistletoe.

[Brooke]

Oh.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

And he did it every five minutes throughout the entire date.

[Brooke]

Oh, God. You had to kiss him so many times.

[Jeffrey]

I know. Lips must be sore.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

He wasn't even a good kisser.

[Jose]

Oh, you did kiss him.

[Jeffrey]

But you have to do what the mistletoe says.

[Jose]

I did.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

I tried, and then eventually, I was.

[Lisa]

Like, Okay, I want you to close.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Your eyes, and I want you to count to 10. And by the time he counted to 10, I just hightailed it out of that bar.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, wow. Quick escape. All right, that's the final bell, and that means the match is over, so we need to score it. Judges. Alexis, who's your choice?

[Alexis]

I'm going Lisa, for having to carol at his ex's house.

[Brooke]

Confrontation.

[Alexis]

My nightmares.

[Jeffrey]

Brooke.

[Brooke]

Oh, I'm going Molly for the guy stuck in her chimney. That's like. That's like a bad local news story.

[Jeffrey]

We're all locked up, so Jose gets the final vote.

[Jose]

I think the meanest thing that happened was tricking someone into decorating a tree. Molly, you win.

[Jeffrey]

That means congratulations, Peppermint lolly. Molly, you are The Kris Kringle of keeping it single for the holidays. Congratulations.

[Brooke]

It's cute when it rhymes. Molly.

[Jose]

Yeah, Jeff was waiting for that.

[Peppermint Lolly Molly]

Thank you so much. I don't know why this feels both embarrassing and victorious.

[Brooke]

Both things can be true.

[Jeffrey]

It's like you're on a date all over again. That's your holiday battle of the Tinder. Dates, phone tabs. Coming up right after this.

[Brooke]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[Jeffrey]

Grab your stain proof laughing pants because it's time for the number 8 phone tap in our countdown of the top phone taps of Christmas.

[Jose]

I got mine, Jeff.

[Brooke]

Mine are already on.

[Jeffrey]

Today features Jose's character, Steady Eddie. Eddie calls the front desk at a roadside motel with a very strange request.

[Brooke]

That one was weird.

[Jeffrey]

An even weirder backstory to it. So get ready for your number 8 phone tap of the year. Right now, it's Brooke and Jeffrey's ten phone taps of Christmas.

[Lisa]

Number eight.

[Caleb]

Travel Lodge. This is Will.

[Jose]

Hi.

[Denise]

Is this the motel off exit 282?

[Caleb]

Yes, it is. Are you looking to book a room?

[Denise]

Oh, no, no, no, thank you.

[Caleb]

Okay, well, how can I help you?

[Denise]

Well, I'd like to book a room, please.

[Caleb]

Oh, you do want to book a room.

[Jose]

All right, well, that's what I said.

[Caleb]

Can I get a name for the reservation?

[Denise]

My name is Edward, but my friends call me Steady Eddie.

[Caleb]

Okay, Edward. When are you looking to stay with us?

[Denise]

Well, it's tonight, but I do have a particular request. Okay, yeah, so, like, my parents, Doug and Dorothy, our first date was at your motel, like 30 years ago, or 40 or 50. They're super old.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Denise]

That's actually where I was conceived.

[Caleb]

Oh, right.

[Denise]

Amazing, right? Anyway, it was on the ground for. And I don't mean like on the ground. Well, maybe. Actually, knowing my mom, I have nine. I mean, it was room 114, and I have been back there many, many times just to check it out.

[Caleb]

So that's the room that you're wanting then? 114 is.

[Jose]

Oh.

[Denise]

Oh, no. Oh, gosh, you're funny. Actually, I like the room next to it, please. That's room 116.

[Caleb]

Okay, let me make sure that's available.

[Denise]

And the reason why is. Cause my parents just left the house and they're heading your way right now.

[Caleb]

Wait, they're heading right now?

[Denise]

We don't have a lot of time here, so if I can get into 1:16, then I'd like to listen.

[Jose]

Listen.

[Caleb]

Listen to.

[Denise]

Yeah, I've always wondered. Cause, you know, like, I wasn't there back then.

[Caleb]

Okay, about this. When you get here, we'll see if the room's booked or not. Okay.

[Denise]

No, I just want to make sure there's no perverts or any freak shows ahead of me, you know?

[Jeffrey]

Oh, God.

[Denise]

Is there a way that I could send some oysters to the room?

[Caleb]

Sir, this is a motel. We don't have oysters here.

[Denise]

Maybe a couple Slim Jims, get the party started, you know?

[Caleb]

Yeah, we don't do anything like that. No room service, no sending anything to room. Sorry.

[Denise]

Okay, well, fine. What if I go to the front desk and I bring some pineapple juice? Can you just drop it off with them and say it's from their little boy?

[Caleb]

No, I can't do that. I'm gonna level with you here. I'm gonna be honest. Your parents probably just want a night to themselves and don't need anything extra from their.

[Denise]

I've been with them for 30 years. I've never left the house without them. They're gonna be scared without them.

[Caleb]

I think you need to give your parents some privacy.

[Denise]

I get what you're saying. You want me to drop off some blindfolds. You're clinky. No, no, that's not Clinkery Dot Dang.

[Caleb]

No, I am not saying that. Please do not bring blindfolds.

[Denise]

I do actually have an exact replica of the Indiana Jones whip. I don't know if my dad knows how to use it, but I could drop it off.

[Jose]

No, no, no. Listen to me.

[Caleb]

Do not come here, okay? Just stay away. Okay? I have other customers and I need to help them right now, so.

[Denise]

Oh, sure, other customers, if you don't mind. Like, you mean like the. Like Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning? Brooks in the motel right now chucking oysters and Slim Jims and checking out all the rooms, listening for my parents.

[Caleb]

I have been on the phone with you for long enough. I have other customers I need to take care of.

[Denise]

Your roommate Freddy said you've been so bored lately, that's why he set you up for this prank phone call.

[Caleb]

Wait, how do you know my roommate?

[Jeffrey]

How do you know Freddie?

[Jose]

Because this is actually Jose from the radio show, Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning, and we're doing a phone tap on you, man. Freddie set you up?

[Caleb]

Wait, are you. Wait, so Freddie did this? Yeah.

[Jose]

Freddie said you've been super bored at your job. Every time you come home, you're like, dog. Nothing is happening at my job.

[Lisa]

Like, I was like, who?

[Caleb]

Who wants to listen to their. Oh, my God.

[Denise]

Excuse me. Excuse me. I wouldn't say weird. Some people are Very close to their family.

[Caleb]

I'm going to have nightmares about this.

[Denise]

Well, I'm going to be sleeping nice and sweet in room 116 next to my parents.

[Caleb]

Okay, you're a little too good at that.

[Lisa]

That was your number 8 phone tap of 2024 5.

[Brooke]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[Jeffrey]

Where's the best place to meet single men in real life?

[Jose]

I don't know, Jeff.

[Jeffrey]

You might think it's out at the bars or at the gym, maybe behind the Jiffy Lube, but nope, none of those. You have to go back there and find out, Alexis.

[Jose]

Hope it's an employee.

[Jeffrey]

Alexis.

[Brooke]

Don't ask. Alexis.

[Jeffrey]

One of our listeners says there's a sneaky spot where you can meet cute guys. Guys who aren't on the dating apps.

[Brooke]

Really?

[Jeffrey]

And it's only during the holidays you're gonna find out where that place is.

[Brooke]

Hey, hey, hey, Santa.

[Jeffrey]

And have to beat me there in a sprint during a brand new second date update. Coming up right after this second date update. Big day on the show, cuz. Denise is back.

[Brooke]

Oh, I've been waiting for Denise.

[Jeffrey]

We all have. Yeah, you may remember her from a second date update around six months ago or so where her strategy was to find available men at the golf course. Oh yeah, yeah.

[Jose]

That was smart too.

[Brooke]

That was. Right.

[Jeffrey]

She decided to take up the hobby and she would go there and say, oh no, I don't know how to do this. How do I swing this long metal stick? And then, well, to do gentlemen would come over and help her. She ended up meeting one guy named Franklin who owned a couple car washes. That whole thing didn't work out in the end, but Denise is not giving up.

[Brooke]

That's right, Denise.

[Jeffrey]

She is back requesting our help once again. But not hitting the golf clubs. Apparently.

[Brooke]

We got a new man hobby.

[Jeffrey]

According to your email, Denise, you've got a new strategy to meet guys.

[Lisa]

Yes.

[Brooke]

Okay, do tell. Yeah.

[Lisa]

Okay. I was thinking about other places that eligible single guys would be okay. And I realized that around the holidays there's a lot of them around the perfume counter shopping for their moms and their sisters and their aunts.

[Jose]

Their girlfriends said just keep the list.

[Alexis]

Going there guys buy perfume for their moms.

[Jose]

I've never bought from my mom, but I have bought my mom chocolate strawberries. So there's a line there.

[Jeffrey]

She should get some perfume next time too, Jose.

[Denise]

Really?

[Jeffrey]

Show her. Yeah.

[Lisa]

Not too far fetched, right?

[Brooke]

No. We actually are a little confused, Denise, because most men buying fragrance, they're going to have a significant other Other.

[Lisa]

Most exactly. Or maybe he's helping his friend.

[Jose]

Oh, we didn't think of that.

[Alexis]

Brooke.

[Jeffrey]

You can't see the look on Brooke's face right now, but she is shaking her head, very skeptical about this entire thing.

[Brooke]

It's a reach. But it sounds like it worked for you because you're on with us and you must have met somebody this way, right?

[Lisa]

Yes. So I did get a part time job at a department store. I do have a full time job, but I'm just doing this at night to meet guys. I say if I'm going to a bar and spending money to meet guys, I can have a job to get money and still meet the guy.

[Brooke]

That sounds smart. So who'd you meet?

[Lisa]

Okay, so I did meet a guy. His name is Caleb.

[Brooke]

Caleb.

[Lisa]

You know, while I was working there, I noticed that not Caleb, but like a lot of guys were married and they would slip their ring off.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, no.

[Jose]

What?

[Brooke]

Sketchy.

[Lisa]

Yeah, I mean, it's something about a really good conversation that get these men going.

[Brooke]

I don't think it's a conversation.

[Alexis]

Good thing about being employees, you can ask who they're buying it for, like straight up.

[Lisa]

Well, okay. So towards the end of the night, that's when he came in. And I was kind of hoping that he wasn't the one, but, you know, I was hoping that maybe.

[Brooke]

Did you say you were hoping that he wasn't the one?

[Jose]

Single one?

[Jeffrey]

What do you mean?

[Lisa]

I mean, not somebody like, oh my gosh, love at first sight. I'm head over heels the one, but a really nice guy. I like options. I like options.

[Jeffrey]

He surprised. He surprised you when he came over to the counter, it sounds like.

[Brooke]

Or he was the only option that was single.

[Alexis]

Yeah.

[Lisa]

What really caught my eye was that he was very shy compared to all of the guys that I've seen all day. And he was actually getting perfume for his mom.

[Jose]

We found out.

[Lisa]

Yeah, they exist.

[Jeffrey]

Okay.

[Lisa]

But he didn't know what to get her. So that's where I came into play luckily.

[Jeffrey]

Okay.

[Lisa]

And I took this opportunity to flirt with him and I sprayed some on my hand and on my neck.

[Jose]

Oh, you do the neck move.

[Alexis]

You had him smell your neck?

[Brooke]

Does this smell like your mom?

[Denise]

Wow.

[Jeffrey]

You pulled out all the moves. Okay.

[Lisa]

All of it. He went with one of the perfumes and I run him up and you know, he just kind of stood there while hanging around the counter because, you know, he's so shy and I was just initiating conversation. So I was very, very direct and I said, if you want to ask me out. It's okay. You can.

[Brooke]

Awesome.

[Jose]

I wish every girl would. Do we need a big green flag? Like, come on, buddy.

[Alexis]

No, because if they say no, then I'm gonna go. Never leave my house again.

[Brooke]

Rejection is not that big of a deal. Trust me, it's not.

[Jose]

I have every day.

[Jeffrey]

What did Caleb say?

[Lisa]

Well, he said, okay, will you go out with me?

[Brooke]

Cute.

[Lisa]

I said yes. And I wrote my number on his receipt.

[Jeffrey]

Wow.

[Lisa]

And then after he left, he had texted me a couple of times.

[Jose]

Okay.

[Lisa]

But there hasn't been an official date yet.

[Jose]

He was really timid. Did you bully him into a day?

[Lisa]

Like, I wouldn' say bully. I would say strongly convinced.

[Jose]

Yeah, he could have said no too.

[Jeffrey]

I'm totally kidding.

[Brooke]

You aren't shy and you love that line that she just gave.

[Jose]

You know what I mean?

[Brooke]

So maybe it's universal. Do you think he just doesn't know what to do on a date? Like, I'm being serious. Like, does it know where to go or, like, what to plan?

[Lisa]

I think because he is so shy, maybe all of this might be a little overwhelming for him. Maybe he doesn't actually, like, acts women out on the regular.

[Jeffrey]

Or do you think maybe he's taken already and was also being a little bit sneaky with you?

[Lisa]

I've seen cheaters. I know how they move.

[Brooke]

Yeah, he doesn't move like a cheater.

[Lisa]

He's not like that.

[Alexis]

Yeah, he's Obama's boy.

[Jeffrey]

Yes.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

It might be possible he put the perfume on his mom, and then he was like, oh, wow. What?

[Jose]

Jeff, don't continue.

[Brooke]

Like, we already did a lot of jokes.

[Alexis]

That would do it. Too late.

[Jeffrey]

I'm just saying it's a possibility for a shy boy.

[Jose]

He's dating his mom now.

[Brooke]

Shy boys want to hook up with their mom.

[Jeffrey]

Let's put everything on the table, and then we'll find out the truth. When we come back, we're gonna call Caleb and find out who he really wants to go out with in your second date update, let's set some rules for Jeff. Happening right after this second date update. If you're a shy boy who's buying perfume for his mom this holiday season.

[Denise]

What?

[Jeffrey]

Jeff, be careful.

[Brooke]

Why?

[Jeffrey]

Because it might be a trap.

[Brooke]

Maybe you want a trap, Jeff.

[Jeffrey]

You maybe do. And I say that because our listener Denise, is a purposeful dater. She tries to put herself in situations so she can meet available men who aren't on the apps.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Like in a previous episode, she was trying to meet guys at the golf course, but now, since it's around the holidays, she's been trying to meet single men at the perfume encounter by working there part time.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jose]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

That is commitment perfumes.

[Denise]

Not cheap.

[Jose]

So I get kind of checks or boxes.

[Jeffrey]

Right. Available probably.

[Brooke]

Well to do thoughtful buys.

[Jeffrey]

Gifts might be a little bit counterintuitive, but there are lots of clueless guys out there who need help shopping for presents. Hopefully for their mother or for their sister.

[Brooke]

Or maybe there's a guy out there that's buying perfume or cologne for himself or for the.

[Jose]

The homeless for charity.

[Brooke]

Homeless?

[Jose]

You. You bought some. Come on, bro.

[Alexis]

I think they need other things first.

[Jeffrey]

Don't go around spritzing the homeless. That's just not a good. Not a good move. But it is how she met Caleb, and she even kind of pushed him into asking her out. Problem is, he hasn't followed through with the actual date yet. So that's where we're going to try and step in and help. Is that right, Denise?

[Lisa]

Yes.

[Jose]

Okay, Denise, recap.

[Brooke]

Are you worried that we're going to scare him even further? Like he's a shy guy and then.

[Lisa]

I mean, it has been some weeks, so I definitely need the help.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Lisa]

I can't do it, or else I'm going to come off too pushy and I'll scare him away.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah. I mean, if it's been weeks, what does she have left to lose at this point?

[Jose]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

What is going to ghost her even more?

[Jose]

She keeps doing the same thing.

[Jeffrey]

That's true.

[Brooke]

All right, well, we'll try to talk softly and not frighten him.

[Alexis]

No one's talking softly in this room.

[Jose]

The second I laugh, laugh, he's gonna be like, oh, what was that?

[Jeffrey]

Okay, well, we'll be delicate with your shy future boyfriend, and we will try and get him to say yes to actually going out on this date with you. So here we go. We just need him to say that. Here we go.

[Caleb]

Hello?

[Jeffrey]

Hey, is this Caleb?

[Caleb]

Yeah, this Caleb.

[Jeffrey]

Hey, man. This is a radio show.

[Brooke]

Oh, strong Jeff.

[Jeffrey]

Good morning. Yeah, hi.

[Caleb]

Hey, good morning.

[Jeffrey]

Morning.

[Jake]

We're a show.

[Jeffrey]

We're called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. I don't know if you've heard of us before.

[Caleb]

I believe I heard of it.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Jeffrey]

Okay. Well, maybe you've heard of the segment that we do that's called the Second Date Update, where we try to reconnect listeners after they've met up once and they're having trouble seeing each other again?

[Caleb]

Yeah, I think so.

[Jeffrey]

Okay.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Jeffrey]

All right. So that's what we're trying to do here with you because one of our listeners, Denise, has been trying to get a hold of you.

[Caleb]

Denise.

[Brooke]

I remember. Denise smells good. Denise. You met her perfume. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jose]

That's why she said that.

[Caleb]

This must be a joke because I've been texting her.

[Jose]

Yeah, I heard that.

[Jeffrey]

But Denise feels like you haven't made enough of a push to actually go out on the date.

[Brooke]

Like, it almost feels like you're texting her out of obligation, not because you actually want to see her. Is she reading that right?

[Caleb]

No. No, I like her.

[Jeffrey]

You do? Okay.

[Jose]

That's great news.

[Caleb]

Yeah, I just. I just can't go out with her.

[Jake]

Oh, no.

[Alexis]

Ever?

[Jeffrey]

Is there a reason?

[Caleb]

No, it's. I want to. It's just not the right time. Not yet.

[Brooke]

Not yet.

[Jeffrey]

Not the right time.

[Jose]

What do you have to wait for, brother?

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, what does it. What does it mean?

[Caleb]

Yeah, I got some. I got some things I'm working on working on myself. And that's what I'm doing.

[Jeffrey]

I mean, with all due respect, people are dating, they have busy lives and sometimes they just can't wait forever. So we're just trying to figure out.

[Brooke]

Like how long this self time is going to take.

[Jeffrey]

Exactly.

[Brooke]

We're talking another week or are we talking two years?

[Caleb]

Well, I'm not exactly sure. I ordered some. Some special supplements and I'm trying them out, see whether they're effective.

[Jose]

So you mean like health supplements? Some people do, like skin, like my buddy takes one. Fish oil or whatever.

[Jeffrey]

For sure. What kind of supplements are we talking about, if you don't mind me asking?

[Caleb]

Yeah, I probably shouldn't say more than I did, but okay.

[Brooke]

Oh, we didn't need to get into a private matter.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah.

[Jose]

You're doing steroids, bro.

[Brooke]

No, I was thinking maybe hair loss. Is that what's going on? Going on?

[Caleb]

Oh, well, it does have to do with growing.

[Jeffrey]

Oh.

[Caleb]

Oh, what?

[Brooke]

Like, wait, sorry, my mind went somewhere.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

You mean like I'm too immature? Fingernails. Right?

[Jose]

Yeah, it could be.

[Jake]

It.

[Caleb]

Yeah, I don't. I. I shouldn't say anymore.

[Jose]

Oh my God.

[Jeffrey]

Okay. Oh, yeah, we. And we really shouldn't ask anymore.

[Brooke]

I don't want to speculate anymore.

[Jose]

Stop asking. My bad.

[Jeffrey]

You're testing out multiple supplements. It sounds like if seeing what works. That's why you're waiting.

[Brooke]

Are you asking Jeff? Cuz you're wondering what the results are for yourself.

[Jeffrey]

My motives are none of your business, bro.

[Jose]

Yeah, Jeff's like, also, what are you taking?

[Jeffrey]

You're just.

[Alexis]

How long till you see results?

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, you're just. You're testing.

[Caleb]

I just really want to be ready for Denise. If it goes well.

[Jeffrey]

Okay.

[Brooke]

I mean, I think supplements are no supplements. You could do that. You could be there.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

I'm just trying to hype him up.

[Jose]

I feel bad for him.

[Jeffrey]

Okay.

[Alexis]

I don't think it works.

[Jeffrey]

I think trying to be one of.

[Brooke]

The guys, I'm trying to, like, make it feel better about whatever it is.

[Jeffrey]

I know what Brook's trying to say. She's trying to say, caleb, truly, a lot of people think that they have it in their mind, oh, I'll start dating once I lose five pounds or once my hair transplants come in. You're waiting for the perfect moment, but there really is never a truly perfect time. You just got to say, you know what? I like this person. I'm going to go for it.

[Caleb]

Yeah, I guess that makes sense.

[Jeffrey]

Okay.

[Jose]

They always say love comes when you least expect it, right? Not when you plan the most for it.

[Caleb]

I just think Denise is really going to like, like it.

[Brooke]

But confidence is good.

[Jeffrey]

And I. I don't know if this is a. If this is a good thing or a bad thing, but I have a feeling you would never go out with Denise unless I told you that she's actually on the phone right now listening to this whole thing.

[Lisa]

Hi, Caleb.

[Caleb]

So embarrassed.

[Lisa]

No, it's. Hey, I'm flattered that. That you, you know, you really want to be ready for the date.

[Brooke]

That's cute.

[Caleb]

Thank you.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, of course.

[Lisa]

I mean, you don't. You don't need to worry about that, though.

[Caleb]

I do.

[Lisa]

No, no, no, no, no, no. I just mean I thought you were cool the way you were when we met and that's what attracted me to you. Like beyond the physical.

[Caleb]

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I'm cool.

[Jose]

Super cool. Dude.

[Lisa]

You know, Kayla, you don't need to take supplements or whatever it is just because of you.

[Caleb]

Mad. Yeah, I just. I. I think you'd like it.

[Lisa]

I don't know if I want to respond to that. I hope I'd like it. I. Oh, my goodness.

[Caleb]

I have a new one coming in this week and it's really promising.

[Brooke]

You mean a new one? How many of you tried?

[Caleb]

Yeah, like, it's called beard burst. I'm trying to get facial hair.

[Jeffrey]

Burst.

[Jose]

It's a facial hair growing thing.

[Brooke]

He said. What did you just say?

[Caleb]

Beard burst? It's her facial hair. Cuz beards are really hot right now.

[Jeffrey]

Rook just fell out the of. That's amazing.

[Lisa]

It's about facial hair?

[Caleb]

Yeah. I'm having Trouble. I want to curl my beard.

[Lisa]

Caleb, you have a cute face. Without facial hair, I mean.

[Brooke]

Oh, my God.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, my God. We were being so delicate with him.

[Caleb]

What did you think it was?

[Jose]

What? I don't think I'm allowed to tell you. Yeah, I think all the listeners are thinking the same. Right?

[Alexis]

Go listen to this back after we're done.

[Jose]

Yes.

[Jeffrey]

You'll hear it different. Yeah.

[Caleb]

Oh, God. Did you think I was trying to order drugs?

[Denise]

Oh, my God.

[Brooke]

But, yes.

[Caleb]

I don't have facial hair, and I want it to get bigger and I just can't grow it.

[Brooke]

Okay, Nobody cares about that.

[Lisa]

Listen, I am pro wanting to feel better about yourself, so you know what? If you're on this beard journey, I will go on this journey with you.

[Jeffrey]

Wow.

[Denise]

Wait, a beer journey together.

[Brooke]

That doesn't mean you're going to grow your own. Right?

[Jose]

No, I know.

[Jeffrey]

Sounded crazy desperate.

[Lisa]

Denise, how about this? As long as I can be your personal facial massager, I think we can make this work.

[Jose]

Face massages sound beautiful.

[Brooke]

That is, like, the best offer we've ever.

[Alexis]

Denise is tired of working at the perfume store.

[Jeffrey]

It's a much better offer than the one that I'm about to give. Where we're going to pay for your next date if you'll agree to see Denise one more time, Caleb.

[Caleb]

Oh, yeah, Absolutely. I really want to see her. I just. I just hope you don't meet a Hemsworth at the perfume counter and kick my ass to the curb.

[Lisa]

No, I'm sure Hemsworth would have nothing on you, sweetheart.

[Jose]

She's great, bro. You gotta keep her.

[Alexis]

Have you looked at a photo of him recently?

[Brooke]

Yeah, I was gonna say she's great at lying.

[Lisa]

Yeah, I did meet him at the perfume counter, guys.

[Jose]

Okay, that did make commission off him.

[Jeffrey]

That's right. We started on a mission to get Denise a date from her perfume counter, and she found her perfect Hemsworth lookalike. Well, soon. Soon to be looking like Hemsworth.

[Jose]

Sounds like the opposite of a Hemsworth.

[Jeffrey]

Caleb. You're the man, Caleb.

[Brooke]

Yeah, thanks.

[Caleb]

Then tonight I'm gonna delete my Tinder profile.

[Jeffrey]

All the ladies mourn.

[Brooke]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[Jeffrey]

Man, talking about medical things on the radio, even supplements. You really gotta be careful.

[Brooke]

Well, the problem is, is that when somebody says that, you don't want to ask a lot of questions. Yeah, but then that leads. Leaves it open to interpretation.

[Alexis]

Exactly.

[Brooke]

Which was obviously wrong.

[Jose]

Yeah, I just.

[Jeffrey]

I wish he would have just came out and told us Beard Blaster pills right at the start of the conversation. Because we could avoid a lot of awkwardness.

[Jose]

Yeah, I thought it was like skin moisturizer at first. It's almost the same, like fish oil. Oh, no, it's beard grower.

[Brooke]

Yeah, right.

[Jeffrey]

The problem was he was talking about how Denise was really gonna like it, and he mentioned growth a few times.

[Jose]

It just.

[Jeffrey]

It led us into a weird space.

[Alexis]

Yeah, but good thing we called him. How long would it have taken till his beard grew? It would have been half a year.

[Jeffrey]

It's still not big enough yet. It has to reach my knees.

[Brooke]

There's another whisker one day closer.

[Jeffrey]

You know what?

[Jake]

We did it.

[Jeffrey]

We got him to go out on a date. So hopefully they reach out to us again and give us an update on their situation.

[Brooke]

Reminded us of where our minds always go to.

[Jose]

Yes, absolutely.

[Jeffrey]

Send us photos of the beauty. Weird when it comes in. Caleb. But that was Jeff.

[Jose]

I'm still worried.

[Jeffrey]

Okay, just send them right to me. But that was a special holiday second date update. If you want to hear more, you can go to Spotify, Iheart, Apple, wherever you get your podcast, find it, pop a few supplements and binge Brooke and.

[Brooke]

Jeffrey in the morning.

[Jeffrey]

Guys, this is so unlike me, but I think I may have messed up Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning because we had a big announcement for our listeners that I probably should have mentioned a little bit earlier.

[Brooke]

Oh, God.

[Jeffrey]

Basically, the announcement was, we're gonna count down our top 10 best phone taps of the year starting on Monday, December 8th.

[Brooke]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Which was two days ago. But okay, in my defense, in my defense, I've been going by the lunar calendar, and according to that, I'm still three months early.

[Brooke]

So we're already two days into the phone tabs. It doesn't matter what the lunar calendar.

[Jose]

Says, but you're still in trouble, Jeff, for being too early.

[Brooke]

The sun is in charge.

[Jeffrey]

Jeff, overall, what does this mean? Basically, we're late, but the top 10 phone tabs of the year are on right now.

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Jeffrey]

Let's hear. These are the favorites, the most listened to ones from our podcast. Playing them every day all the way till next Friday when we reach number one. That means the following Friday, not the lunar one, because that one's coming up in June. And if you miss any of them, they're all up on our YouTube at Brooke and Jeffrey or on our podcast, wherever you get our show. Apple, Spotify, Spa, Fitfi, wherever you get them.

[Brooke]

Did you recommend write down a word you can't see anymore on the paper.

[Jeffrey]

I'm reading off the lunar calendar again. And according to my lunar calendar, we are late for Laser stories which is next week.

[Brooke]

No next.

[Jeffrey]

No, it's just next. Okay. It's the radio segment that's bringing fashion to the ski slopes with new stiletto high heeled ski boots. So now you could shred some powder and show off your calf muscles at the same time.

[Brooke]

Wow.

[Jeffrey]

Only do it with Laser stories. The segment where we read weird news stories around the globe just like everyone else does. Except we've got a laser. Those are the glow ups from the snow up. Just don't. This first laser story is out of Ohio. 36 year old guy named Wasser Sandalson walked into his local bank recently and asked if he could make a deposit.

[Brooke]

It all right.

[Jeffrey]

And there was quite a line. So one of the supervisors told him he could use the drive thru ATM and it would work just the same.

[Brooke]

Yeah, but he was already there.

[Jeffrey]

But the line was too long.

[Brooke]

Oh oh. Told him before he got to the counter. I imagined him waiting in line at the end of the line finally being told actually get in your car.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, that would be a real slap in the face. But Wasser went and got into his car, pulled around to the drive through and was using the bank's air tube system. God I love those.

[Alexis]

Oh they're so cool.

[Jeffrey]

I know, they are fun. He included a few checks and then maybe accidentally dropped a small baggie of meth in the canister as well.

[Jose]

Oh, you just put that in my safety deposit box for me.

[Jeffrey]

Thanks. Yeah, well of course the bank called it in and cops showed up.

[Brooke]

They going to send it right back.

[Jeffrey]

Oh man, the bankers just aren't cool anymore. Officers tracked walk Wasser down who completely denied it was him with the drugs.

[Brooke]

Absolutely. I was already in the tube.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, then that's a good idea. They went and searched his car and found more meth.

[Jose]

Darn it. What a coincidence.

[Brooke]

I thought they was giving away free like the dumb dumbs.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, whole world's against him. No word yet on the exact charges he's facing. Wasser blames the confusing tube system for his incarceration. That's it.

[Brooke]

But he didn't rob the bank, so.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, he gave exactly.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Justice. Where is the justice in this world? This next laser story is out of Europe. While there's droughts all over the world thanks to global warming, the small country of Latvia is experiencing a very different kind. They have an official man drought.

[Brooke]

Oh no.

[Jose]

Move.

[Alexis]

Get out.

[Jeffrey]

For some reason the Baltic nation officially has has 16% more women than men currently a gap more than three times any other European country.

[Jose]

Wow, nice ratio.

[Brooke]

Half of our list of the audience is thinking, move there, Alexis. I know.

[Alexis]

I did sort of think that after I'm like, wait, maybe live there, take visits somewhere else.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, well, the ladies in Latvia have come up with a solution. It's called hourly rental husbands.

[Brooke]

Not one you have to keep your whole life. Hey, ain't you interesting?

[Jeffrey]

So you're interested, Brooke? Okay, let's. I'll tell you more then. The services have exploded across the region with companies promising to send over, quote, men with golden hands.

[Jose]

What does that mean? Like back rubs?

[Jeffrey]

No, no, no. It's none of. None of that stuff.

[Brooke]

Bro is already on a Latvian website, so you better explain quick.

[Jeffrey]

I know you're googling right away. This is a fancy way to say a handyman man with golden hands who will show up to fix leaky pipes, mount your TVs, or do other chores for you around the house without you.

[Brooke]

Nagging him five times to do it.

[Alexis]

That's sweet.

[Jeffrey]

That's actually true, cuz. Another service takes the concept even further by explicitly renting husbands where customers book online or by phone, and within an hour, a random man appears at your door. Not to flirt, not to argue about weekend plans. They're simply there to paint your walls, fix the curtains. Whatever you need, they will do it immediately.

[Jose]

Which will turn on the women more than them actually trying to hit on the women.

[Brooke]

It's not. You're not wrong.

[Jose]

Fixing stuff is natural.

[Brooke]

Did you just take the garbage out?

[Jake]

Yeah.

[Jose]

He's like, lady, leave me alone. I'm doing my job.

[Jeffrey]

So could it come to America soon? I feel like depends on the lady's interests.

[Brooke]

I don't know. I feel like, Jeff, you'd be ready to husband to do all this work for you before I. Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

D me in. This next laser story is out of the Holly High Note Hall. Mariah Carey's recorded hundreds and hundreds of songs across her career, but she could have basically retired comfortably if she'd only ever released one song. And yep, it's that one.

[Jose]

Don't wanna lock.

[Jeffrey]

Jose knows it.

[Jose]

Someone tell me to stop. You can stop. We're good.

[Brooke]

This is maybe the year that I. I've tapped out of this song. Song. It's the first year I'm like, yeah.

[Jose]

I haven't listened to it from beginning to end yet.

[Jeffrey]

You might be one of the only people, Brooke, because according to a recent financial publication, Mariah rakes in more than $2.5 million in royalties every single year from the song.

[Brooke]

Yeah, but have you seen her lifestyle that affords like one of her dog's.

[Jose]

Houses help for a month?

[Denise]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

And it is a little ironic since the song is supposed to be about somebody not caring about materialistic aspects of the holidays as long as they can be with their partner. But still, he makes a ton of dough.

[Jose]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

And Mariah isn't the only one making bank off it. All I Want for Christmas was co written by a music producer named Walter Afanasif.

[Brooke]

Now let's go, Walt.

[Jeffrey]

He did a lot of work with mariah in the 90s. And even though he hasn't really done much since, he has a net worth of over a hundred million dollars because.

[Jose]

His lifestyle isn't as lavish.

[Brooke]

Is another.

[Jeffrey]

Mansion y. Interestingly enough, the song is not fading into obscurity. It's actually becoming more popular. It hit number one on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first time back in 2019, but it's returned to the top spot every year since, which is a six year streak.

[Brooke]

It's so old.

[Jose]

I always play Christmas music, but I don't like God for that one.

[Alexis]

I mean, Jeff just did a parody to it. What? A few weeks ago.

[Jose]

I mean, it's iconic.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

You're welcome, Mariah. Will it go to number one in 2025? I guess we'll have to wait and find out.

[Jose]

Probably.

[Jeffrey]

This final laser story is out of holiday headquarters.

[Alexis]

Yay.

[Jeffrey]

Are you putting up a tree? This year the new poll found most Americans will have a Christmas tree in their home and a surprising number of us will have two or more.

[Jose]

Yeah, if I had a bigger house, I would totally.

[Brooke]

You would have more than one?

[Jose]

Oh, yeah. One in every room.

[Brooke]

I feel like you'd really leave them up all year long. Yeah, I do.

[Jeffrey]

14% overall, or 1 in 7 people will have at least two trees in their place. That includes 2% who said more than three.

[Brooke]

Hometown Jeff. I forget, do you do a Christmas tree or do you not?

[Jeffrey]

I do many Christmas trees. Doesn't necessarily mean you're putting in multiple full size trees.

[Brooke]

Got little tiny cuties.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, maybe you got like the big one in the living room and like me, you put a medium one in the sauna. Oh, yeah. Now I don't know, but overall that number is way up from where it was last year. So when you're visiting at a friend's house over the holidays, don't be surprised to see more green. Yeah. Oh, I am seeing way too much green right now in front of me. But for some reason. Reason I just can't look away.

[Brooke]

You never can.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, my God. I like what I'm seeing. It means Laser Stories has come to an end for the day. We'll do it again same time on Friday.

[Brooke]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[Jeffrey]

You know, this song reminds you of. What? Brooke, do you remember what you you did last Christmas? Which factory you bought in which third world country?

[Brooke]

A raise.

[Jeffrey]

A raise. Oh, that's funny, because I remember you laughing about denying workers their benefits. The only thing that I remember, though, I don't know the details. You really did have a good Christmas last year, though. You're the one denying benefits.

[Jose]

I'll just take those healthcare premiums and pocket them.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, so generous. But one guy wants to ruin your Christmas this year.

[Brooke]

Oh, my God.

[Jeffrey]

A man named Cody, who is back after he lost to you a few months ago by just one point.

[Jose]

I remember Cody.

[Caleb]

Hi, Brooke.

[Brooke]

Wow, Cody, it sounds like you've really been holding a grudge against me for a couple months.

[Caleb]

I've been holding it for a year.

[Jose]

Oh, wow, he's salivating at the mouth, man.

[Brooke]

Have you been, like, spreading nasty rumors and stuff about me? Me too.

[Caleb]

Never. No.

[Jose]

No.

[Jeffrey]

Nobody in this room does that. Not online.

[Jose]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

What? Jeff, what did you put online?

[Jeffrey]

Nothing. Just don't look at Twitter. Okay, so, Cody, we got to get to the game here. You got 30 seconds on the clock to answer as many questions as possible. Brooke has left the studio. If you don't know when you could say pass. But you have to beat her outright if you want to win. Are you ready?

[Caleb]

Absolutely ready they'll ever be.

[Jeffrey]

Good luck, my man. Your time starts now. The first Nobel Peace Prize was awarded on this day in 191901. Scientist Marie Curry won how many Nobel prizes in her lifetime? Duff beer is from what TV show?

[Caleb]

The Simpson.

[Jeffrey]

Mars and Murray are the inventors of what famous chocolate candy. In the Guardians of the Galaxy, the character Groot can only say what three word phrase.

[Caleb]

I am Groot.

[Jeffrey]

What sport is known as America's pastime?

[Caleb]

Baseball.

[Jeffrey]

The base for the Spanish dish Paa is what?

[Caleb]

Pass.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, God, I love paella. Ooh, but I do love some pass in my paella. That is yummy. Oh, is Brooke. Is Brooke laying off more people out there?

[Denise]

I think so.

[Jeffrey]

Okay, we got to give her a chance to finish firing them. And she's back.

[Brooke]

She was laughing outside.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, we saw. Now, Cody, it says that you work two jobs at the same mall, and when our producer asked you if you have any Christmas traditions, you said no, you don't. Because this Is the busiest time of year for you working around the clock at the mall?

[Caleb]

Oh, oh, yeah, yeah. I'm working six days straight for two weeks straight.

[Jose]

That money, though, brother. And you're very important. We appreciate your work.

[Jeffrey]

If I go to the mall and I say that I work there at the food court, will I get a discount? Oh, does that work?

[Caleb]

Or some of the places will give.

[Jeffrey]

It to you without you having to ask if anything. Okay, is there like a secret work word that you have to say, like moist?

[Brooke]

I think it's a handshake.

[Jeffrey]

A secret handshake?

[Jose]

Yeah, it's a secret.

[Brooke]

And then you do the tickle.

[Jeffrey]

Okay, so if I. If I go to Panda Express and I give them a secret moist handshake, I'll get 30 off Chicken Chow mein.

[Caleb]

No, you just have to wear, like, your lanyard from your job. Or, like, say, an apron from the one I do.

[Brooke]

Okay. Nothing moist about any of that.

[Jeffrey]

No, I feel like I'd rather work in one of Brooks factories, honestly. So, anyway, anyway, Brooke, it's your turn. Are you ready?

[Denise]

Yes.

[Jeffrey]

Good luck. Your time starts now. The first Nobel Peace Prize was awarded on this day in 1901. Scientist Marie Curry won how many Nobel prizes in her life?

[Brooke]

3.

[Jeffrey]

Duff Beer is from what TV show?

[Brooke]

Simpsons.

[Jeffrey]

Mars and Murray are the inventors of what famous chocolate candy?

[Brooke]

Eminem.

[Jeffrey]

In Guardians of the Galaxy, the character Groot can only say what three word phrase.

[Brooke]

I am Groot.

[Jeffrey]

What sport is known as America's pastime?

[Brooke]

Baseball.

[Jeffrey]

The base for the Spanish Dis paella is. Is what?

[Brooke]

Rice.

[Jose]

I love you, Brooke. Duh.

[Denise]

What am I, an idiot?

[Caleb]

What?

[Jeffrey]

Stupid question. Let's go over the scoreboard to see how you bolted with Jose.

[Jose]

There's a person on my back.

[Brooke]

And.

[Jose]

Oh, Cody, you got three correct today.

[Brooke]

Oh, not bad, Cody.

[Jeffrey]

Pretty good.

[Caleb]

Okay.

[Jeffrey]

All right, I'll take it.

[Jose]

Solid.

[Denise]

And.

[Jeffrey]

And.

[Denise]

Brooke.

[Jose]

Five.

[Lisa]

Wow.

[Jeffrey]

Sorry.

[Caleb]

This is not over, Brooke. This is not over.

[Brooke]

I could actually hear you shaking your hand in the air.

[Lisa]

Little fist.

[Jeffrey]

Revenge is going to come one of these days. Let's go over the answers for everybody. First Nobel Peace Prize was awarded on this day in 1901. Scientist Marie Curry. She won two Nobel prizes.

[Brooke]

I would have given her a third.

[Jeffrey]

One in chemistry and one in physics. Duff Beer is from the Simpsons TV show. Mars and Murray are the inventors of Eminem's candy. The M's represent each of their names. Mars.

[Brooke]

It's a wild story. They ended up hating each other.

[Jose]

Oh, really?

[Brooke]

Yeah. Go look into it. I can't believe there's not a movie about these guys.

[Jeffrey]

In the Guardians of the Galaxy, Groot can only say the three word phrase, I am Groot.

[Jose]

Great impression, Brooke.

[Brooke]

Oh, thanks.

[Jeffrey]

America's pastime is baseball, and the base for the Spanish dish paella would be rice.

[Jose]

So good, man.

[Jeffrey]

So, Cody, I'm sorry, man. It wasn't enough to beat Brooke today. But just for playing, we are giving you a pair of tickets to see the Everett Silver Tips take on the Seattle Thunderbirds at Angelo the Winds arena on Sunday, December 28th.

[Caleb]

Okay. All right.

[Jose]

Okay, Cody.

[Brooke]

Well, hey. Come back. Try again. That's it.

[Jeffrey]

Wow, Inspiring message.

[Brooke]

I didn't have anything else to add to that.

[Jeffrey]

Back and play again soon, man. We're going to do win Brooks Bucks same time tomorrow? Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.