FULL SHOW: Jeff’s Pizza Parody, Riffin’ Around Marching Bands + Reverse Catfish Date (3/6/26)

Summary

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Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update

Episode: FULL SHOW – Jeff’s Pizza Parody, Riffin’ Around Marching Bands + Reverse Catfish Date (3/6/26)

Release Date: March 8, 2026
Host: iHeartPodcasts

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Episode Overview

This lively episode of "Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update" features a high-energy mix of radio games, playful banter, pop culture news, and a signature Second Date Update segment. Main highlights include a hilarious parody song about the ongoing fast food pizza "wars," a game where the team guesses hit songs played by marching bands, and a jaw-dropping "reverse catfish" dating story involving a surprise Photoshop twist.

The show maintains its trademark charm: quick-witted humor, inside jokes between the co-hosts, and inviting listener participation. If you're in for clever games, awkward romance, and laugh-out-loud moments, this is an episode you don’t want to miss.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. Show Opener and Listener Comments

[00:00–01:37]

• Brooke and Jeffrey tease a new parody song by Jeff, warning it might "ruin" a classic.
• Popularity of their games and song parodies on social media is discussed; fans clamor to hear more marching band segments.
• Special shout-out to listener Sierra from Boise, supportive of the show's merch and cast.

“I don't know if he either made a classic better and I'm never going to be able to hear the classic song the same again—or if he ruined it for me.” – Brooke [00:05]

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2. Viral Content, Social Media, and ‘Stolen’ Material

[01:42–04:26]

• Light-hearted complaints about their TikTok and Instagram content being reposted without credit.
• The team jokes about their failed efforts to stop content theft, comparing it to a young entrepreneur’s run-in with the Spice Girls’ lawyers after starting “Spice Girls Taco Seasoning.”

“We should’ve got the Spice Girls Lawyers.” – Jeffrey [02:33]

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3. Shot Caller Trivia: National Day of Unplugging & Phone Addiction

[04:26–10:20]

• Host Jake quizzes the team with "Plenty of 20" stats about screen time and tech use.
• Questions include average Netflix use, teen phone screen time, and the number of times a typical American checks their phone.
• The segment is filled with comedic asides and playful ribbing between cast members.

“Average American checks their phone 120 times per day…is the real number over or under?” – Jake [07:15]

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4. Laser Stories: Weird & Funny News

[12:43–20:40]

• Hilarious news stories, such as:
  • A failed driving test in the UK where the student (and his instructor!) were arrested for drug use. [13:21]
  • Southwest Airlines’ (controversial) new plan to only clean premium seats between flights. [15:02]
  • Taco Bell’s latest dessert—a chocolate/caramel empanada, delighting the cast. [16:45]
  • An app that detects if someone nearby is wearing video-recording smart glasses. [18:18]

“Southwest generally hasn’t had cleaners come on planes between flights at all…they rely on flight attendants!” – Jeffrey [16:02]

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5. Riffin’ Around: Marching Band Edition

[21:09–28:34]

• The crew is challenged to name pop hits and movie themes played by marching bands, with a humorous twist.
• Standouts include Alexis correctly guessing “All-Star,” Jose nailing “Men in Black,” and Brooke struggling comically with “Dream On.”
• Game ends in a dramatic tiebreaker (“Take On Me,” guessed by Jose).

“You think we’re smart and knowledgeable about stuff…No one thought that.” – Jeffrey & Brooke [20:56]

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6. Second Date Update: The Reverse Catfish (Amy & Emmett)

[34:55–51:59]

• [35:46] Amy invites her date Emmett over for a “cold plunge” on their first meeting—a brave, out-of-comfort-zone activity detailed with plenty of humor.
• They have a good time, but after he leaves, Amy accidentally texts Emmett’s profile photo—intended for her friends—directly to him, calling him a “cutie.”
• Emmett not only ghosts her, but when the show contacts him, he reveals the real issue: Amy sent him a highly Photoshopped version of his own photo—he looked 20 lbs lighter, with a narrow chin and whiter teeth!
• Amy confesses to “enhancing” his pic for her friends, saying it shows “his potential.”
• Discussion grows heated as the crew debates whether Amy’s behavior is superficial or, as she insists, aspirational for her partner.
• After awkward negotiation, Emmett reluctantly agrees to a second date (with plenty of reservations).

“I just kind of wanted to show what your potential could be.” – Amy [46:20]
“Her friends are going to have an image of you in their head…it’s going to be like Shallow Hal but in real life.” – Jose [49:35]
“Regretfully, I’m going to say yes…because I don’t have a lot of matches right now.” – Emmett [50:23]

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7. Jeff’s Song of the Week: Pizza Parody – ‘Another One Stuffs the Crust’

[53:03–59:58]

• Jeff debuts a Queen-inspired pizza parody song, “Another One Stuffs the Crust,” celebrating the “pizza wars” among chains like Domino’s, Pizza Hut, Papa John’s, and Little Caesars.
• Live reactions as the hosts eat real pizza in-studio during the performance.
• Parody features inventive, food-filled lyrics, “pizza lust,” and clever brand callouts; the crew gets visibly (and audibly) hungry.

“And you probably walk weird too if Papa John stuffed your crust.” – Jeffrey (singing) [57:51]

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8. Win Brooke’s Bucks: Listener Calls & Trivia

[60:14–65:51]

• Listener Amanda (a nurse manager) battles Brooke in trivia—questions include Neil Armstrong’s moon landing quote, shrimp-cooking techniques, and animals with the largest eyes.
• Amanda shares a personal story about her daughter’s broken thumb.
• Brooke narrowly wins, but Amanda gets Hot Wheels Monster Truck tickets for her family.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• “You know what? I hear you, Brooke—this might make you hungry. So just to make sure…in-studio, Domino's is here.” – Jeffrey [55:30]
• “That's not a pimple, it's my lunch from an hour ago.” – Laser Stories (on "Guac-a-moleys" cosmetic procedures) [13:02]
• “If a guy sent a photo of me to his buddies where I was skinnier and hotter with bigger boobs, I’d be so pissed.” – Brooke [51:12]

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Timestamps of Key Segments

• Listener Comments & Social Media: 00:00–04:26
• Phone Addiction Trivia (Plenty of 20): 04:26–10:20
• Laser Stories: 12:43–20:40
• Riffin’ Around Game: 21:09–28:34
• Second Date Update [Reverse Catfish!]: 34:55–51:59
• Song of the Week – Pizza Parody: 53:03–59:58
• Win Brooke’s Bucks Trivia: 60:14–65:51

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Episode Tone & Takeaway

Equal parts silly, sharp, and slightly unhinged, this episode showcases all the strengths of "Brooke and Jeffrey": chemistry among the hosts, absurd but relatable dating stories, and pop culture humor delivered with a wink. The pizza parody is an instant classic, and the Second Date Update reminds listeners of the perils (and surprises) of modern courtship.

Useful for: Anyone who missed the show or wants to cherry-pick the funniest/most dramatic segments – especially the Reverse Catfish Second Date Update ([34:55–51:59]) and the pizza song ([53:03–59:58]). Fans of relationship comedy, radio soundbites, and food parodies will love this one.

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Transcript

[A]

Hey, it's Brooke and Jeffrey and we've got a brand new full hour, just a warning before Jeff's song.

[B]

Warning?

[A]

Yeah, I think that he. I don't know if he either made a classic better and I'm never going to be able to hear the classic song the same again. Yeah. Or if he ruined it for me. Oh, wow.

[C]

I can't even listen to the song

[A]

because I really love the original too. Got it. So you'll understand in just a second. And my God, we got such a response from of course, our shot caller. Question of the day the other day where we did the marching bands.

[B]

Yes. A few of you guys all come commented that you want to hear more of it. So guess what?

[A]

Yeah, we listened. Yeah, we did. Yeah, we got a riffing around marching band style coming up and a new second date. But first comment.

[B]

Yes. Well, I was gonna say, I know we say go to our YouTube all the time, but today really is the day to go because you can see riffing around and Jeff's song where there's a special guest appearance show up in it. So go to our YouTube, Brooke and Jeffrey.

[A]

Yeah, good point.

[B]

But for comments we have. This was a text actually, I saw because it says hi. Since nobody wants to read my YouTube comments, Alexis, I figure I'll try to get a shout out here. My nine year old son and I have listened to every single YouTube episode and love your merch for a cause. I've been listening since Jeffrey was just a little side character. Baruch, if you ever need a wine bestie, let me know. I love you so much, Jose. My son loves your laugh. And Alexis, well, I'm mad at you, but. Hi from Boise. Xoxo, Sierra.

[A]

That's so great, Sierra.

[B]

So I hope I'm on your good side now. Okay.

[A]

And we're working on getting another merch for a cause up. So be ready for merch coming up in, I don't know, maybe a month. Month or so. Oh, okay.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

There's my real deep tease. Yeah, your brand new full hour starts right now.

[D]

People steal our stuff all the time.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh yeah.

[D]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Our phone taps, our second date calls. They're all over tick tock and Facebook and Instagram.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, it's cool that you found us that way.

[D]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Someone tried to put my laugh over another show.

[D]

Interesting.

[C]

And it made it better. Hey, I was like, this is a

[D]

good show, I might go listen. But hardly any of those videos were actually posted by us.

[C]

No, they never are old to make

[A]

ours go viral, please.

[C]

Thank you.

[D]

We tried for about like a week or two to go after these people that were using our content and do like, cease and desists, but the trolls just laughed at us and created even more fake accounts.

[A]

It was interesting. It did really honestly generate more.

[C]

So yeah, it's actually wild.

[D]

We just had to give up. But now I know what we should have done in hindsight.

[A]

What's that?

[D]

We should have got the Spice Girls Lawyers. Oh. I say that because a young lady from Canada named Lily Bond started her own business when she was just 13 years old called Spice Girls Taco Seasoning. That's spice spelled with a Y. Girls spelled with a Z so she doesn't get sued.

[A]

So there's girl.

[D]

There's a photo of Lily with her little company. She started selling packets of her homemade seasoning with her mom all around local farmers markets.

[C]

I would totally buy that.

[A]

Yeah, because she's the Spice Girl. Like, not as in the band. Like, she makes spicy tacos.

[D]

Well, unfortunately for Lily, it got too popular. Uh oh, and guess who heard about it.

[A]

Oh, no.

[D]

Nasty Spice.

[A]

Yeah. Did Lawyer Spice come after them?

[D]

Yeah, that's the name of the Spice Girls lawyer.

[A]

Uh huh.

[D]

Soon, the British pop stars threatened to sue the little girl if she kept up her mean entrepreneurial shenanigans. Wow. Lily tried to fight back, but could not afford the legal fees, saying the Spice Girls were too ruthless. So eventually, she was forced to give up her dream and her company name.

[A]

What is she going to. Well, she's gotten older. Maybe she's now Taco Teen trying to think of alternatives.

[D]

I'm sure that there's a music group that are called the Taco Teens, so you don't want to get into them either. Here's the good news. She did rebrand. And because of the global publicity from her feud with the Spice Girls, she's now selling even more.

[C]

Okay, it's meant to be.

[A]

Then she should be blasting Spice Girl's music in her town.

[C]

No, don't you poke the bear.

[D]

Maybe our digital producer has the phone number to Nasty Spice Lawyer. And we can get that after the shot collar question of the day. But first, let's do what all the people want to hear, some trivia. Jake, we're going to do that.

[E]

Today is the national day of Unplugging.

[C]

Unplugging?

[E]

Yes. Where you're encouraged to step away from your technology. Power down your devices for 24 hours.

[A]

Wait, but can you do it after our show? Please?

[E]

You know you're supposed to reconnect with the world on a day like today.

[C]

Got it.

[E]

It's a nice thought, but let's be realistic. The average Joe can't even put their phone away long enough to microwave a Hot Pocket. No, they're listening for the timer. They're checking three different apps. Two group chats watching a video of a raccoon take a milkshake from a doordash driver.

[C]

Aw, his little hands.

[A]

It deserves that milkshake.

[E]

That's just a snapshot of Jose's nightlight yesterday. But how phone addicted are we?

[C]

Really?

[E]

You're gonna have to tell me during a special scroll patrol edition of plenty of 20.

[A]

I feel like this is a PSA video they're playing in all schools right now.

[E]

You'll say number one through 20. I'll give you a statistic about modern technology use. You just have to tell me if the real number is over or under.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[E]

We'll start with the woman who attempted to sell her online feet pics for under five bucks, but her wifi sucked. That's Alexis.

[C]

And the guys kept going. No, here's one

[E]

for adults. In the United States, the average time spent watching Netflix per day is two hours. Is the real number over or under?

[B]

Oh, two a day is a lot like in a weekend, easy.

[C]

I mean, it's a weekend or a

[A]

vacation week, and it's only Netflix.

[B]

But honestly, like, one TV show episode now is like an hour.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Or more.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Two episodes.

[B]

I somehow think it is. Oh, I have to say. Higher or lower? Not true.

[A]

Over. Gosh, over two hours.

[B]

Okay, now you lost me. I'm going under. I thought maybe just two.

[C]

Under.

[E]

Under is correct. Alexis. The average is about an hour and 10 minutes per day. But the heavy users do push that average up higher. Brooke, we're over to you. Three is off the board.

[A]

All right, give me 19.

[E]

The average teenager's daily screen time on their phone is now up to five hours per day. Is the real number over or under 5?

[C]

Feels accurate.

[A]

Easy find.

[B]

Do you get the screen time updates

[A]

on your own self? Yeah, I mean, the problem is that even listening to music on your phone counts as that time. And so, like, I listen to a lot of music from my phone. I'm gonna say it's over.

[E]

Over five hours.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Is correct.

[D]

Brooke.

[E]

A recent study found teens are now up to 7 plus hours per day on their phones. We're talking screen time stats for National Day of Unplugging. And, Jose, we're over to you. The ladies are two and, oh, so far need A number from you for Jose. How many times a day do you check your phone?

[C]

Dude, I can't count. There's not a number. Infinity symbol.

[E]

Did you know the average American checks their phone 120 times per day? Is the real number over or under?

[C]

See, here's my thing. It's almost a tick where if I haven't looked down and just tap my phone, look at the time, look to see if I got a text and then untap it.

[E]

Makes you feel safe.

[D]

But it's the average person, not. Not the typical Jose with adhd.

[A]

Typical Jose brings the average way up.

[C]

Oh, my gosh, you're right, though. Does the normal person need to touch their phone every five minutes? I hope for society, I'm gonna say under. Don't be me.

[E]

Under is correct. Jose, many studies estimate people check their phones 90 to 100 times per day on average.

[A]

Can you imagine if we did something more useful 90 to 100 times a day?

[C]

Well, I know I do.

[A]

That's a lot.

[E]

Jeffrey, we're over to you. 90 to 100 is a lot. 3, 4 are off the board.

[D]

I'll do number six.

[E]

The average American spends one full month per year watching TV or streaming. One full month. We're talking 24 hours every day for a month. You burn an entire month of your life watching tv. Is the real number over or under?

[D]

I don't know how it's physically even possible to have that much.

[A]

Well, no, he's saying, like, out of all the time you add up for the year, it would be a month. Not that people actually sit down and watch 24 7.

[D]

I don't need to be woman. Explain to you. Okay, I understand that it's added over time.

[A]

You just said you didn't understand.

[D]

Your woman's pointing at me again. Just because of that, I'm gonna say it's far over.

[E]

Jeffrey said over, and he's right.

[C]

Wow, thanks a lot, Brooke. Your tiny man brain wouldn't have been able to compute that.

[D]

I know.

[E]

When you add it up, Americans average about two and a half months per year watching TV and streaming content. And now that everyone's gotten one right, we're gonna go to Alexander Alexis for the tiebreaker.

[D]

Hopefully it'll save me.

[E]

Alexis, if you get this right, you guys are all safe. If you get it wrong, I will get shocked.

[C]

Hey, a lot of pressure, alexis.

[E]

Teenagers spend two hours per day watching videos on platforms like YouTube or TikTok. Is the real number over or under?

[B]

I don't even need a second to think over. Yeah, Easy peasy.

[A]

Dang it.

[E]

Shoot. All right, Brooke, would you please woman splain to Jeffrey that I lost today's edition of plenty of 20.

[A]

Jeffrey, that means that Jake is gonna.

[D]

I get it, Brooke. I'm not even gonna explain how it works because I know Jake is a man and gets it. It's gonna be singing.

[C]

You'll figure it out.

[D]

Hotline Bling by Drake.

[E]

You used to call me on my cell phone Late night when you need my love.

[D]

Yes.

[E]

Call me on my cell phone.

[C]

It's a good intro.

[E]

Late night when you need my love. I'm just anticipating it. I know when that hotline bleed.

[C]

Okay.

[E]

He just looks at me in the eyes before he shocks.

[D]

Shot collar. Question of the day. We got your phone tab coming up in just a few minutes.

[F]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[D]

We do a lot of relationship stuff on the show. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[A]

Yes.

[D]

And this just came across my desk this morning. The top five female names that cheat the most.

[C]

Oh, my gosh.

[D]

Any guesses of a name that you think is on there? Alexis, you can go first.

[G]

Oof.

[A]

I don't know. Bars. Barb, I got one.

[B]

Great.

[A]

That's your mom's name.

[D]

Barb is not on the list. I'm sorry. Alexis. Brooke, what do you think?

[A]

Jennifer.

[D]

Jennifer didn't make the top five. Jose, what do you. There's only one guess. Jose, what do you think?

[C]

Can I say my ex's name? I shouldn't.

[D]

It's not on the list. I know the name. It's not on the list.

[C]

Let's just go with Sarah.

[D]

Sarah did not make the top five. We'll start with number five. Elizabeth or Liz. 12% say that they've cheated at some point before. Number four. Nicole.

[A]

Oh, yeah, Nicole's. That's so strong.

[E]

Absolutely.

[D]

Is that your mom's name?

[E]

No, it's not.

[D]

Oh, okay. If you're dating a Nicole right now, wait till she falls asleep and make sure to check her phone because 20 admit to having cheated at some point in their life.

[C]

One in five.

[E]

Nicole.

[D]

It gets worse because number three is Melissa.

[C]

What are you doing?

[D]

One of my best friends in middle school was named Melissa.

[A]

I bet she had another best friend.

[D]

I know I probably shouldn't have trusted her. Number two. Stephanie.

[A]

Stephanie's shady. Sorry, Steph, Scott.

[E]

Fanny in the name.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Stephanie's also kind of like party girl, I feel.

[C]

Right.

[D]

Absolutely. Almost 40% of Stephanie say at some point they've been off at some off campus keg party and thought, oh, that guy Is cute in that corner's dark.

[C]

Hey, our friend Stephanie and Sals, we're on to you. Or you're listening and I know you are.

[D]

And the number one most common name for cheaters as far as females go. Look out if you're dating an Emily.

[E]

Oh, surprising.

[A]

That would not be my guess. Is that because they're so unassuming?

[D]

I don't know, Emily. They lead the league in infidelity at 44%. So if you're dating one or if you are one of those names. Stop it. Just stop doing that because Laser Stories is coming up right after this.

[C]

Hello, it's Laser Stories.

[D]

It's the radio segment that's launching a new cosmetic procedure called guacamole.

[C]

Wait a minute.

[D]

That dyes skin growths on your face a bright avocado green. So now you can tell your hot date. Oh, that's not a pimple. It's my lunch from an hour ago. Yeah.

[C]

That is so gross.

[A]

That's better.

[D]

They'll never know. Guac your moleys Today with Laser Stories, the segment where we read weird news stories around the globe just like everyone else does. Except we've got a laser those other green beans just don't. This first laser story is out of the United Kingdom.

[C]

Alright then.

[D]

The other night, police stopped a vehicle when they noticed that it had a defective brake light. They also said it caught their attention due to poor driving.

[A]

Oh, Alexis was not in the uk. You guys can't say sometimes.

[D]

Yeah, ruling her out for this one because while they were speaking to the driver, they thought something was off. So they conducted a drug test. And guess what? Oh, the guy failed. Epic fail. But here's the kicker. There was another person in the car with him.

[C]

Him?

[D]

Yeah, his driving instructor. That's when both officers realized the 26 year old man behind the wheel was actually in the middle of taking his driving test.

[C]

That's amazing.

[D]

He wasn't fully licensed. That was problem number one. Okay, the other issue was the instructor didn't seem to have an answer if he was a willing participant in the impromptu drug party.

[C]

So the instructor might have been in on it.

[A]

That's how you get your instructor to pass you when you're not very good.

[D]

Yeah, well, both of them were arrested and the driving test was terminated.

[A]

Dang it. Both were arrested.

[D]

Afterwards, the young man's mother back at the test center was shocked to see a police officer, which led to a very awkward conversation. And she was told to go meet her son downtown. And no, he won't be driving himself There.

[F]

Wait.

[A]

He was 26 years old, and his mom took him to his driving test.

[C]

Brooke, that's not the worst part of the story.

[B]

He had to get there somehow.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean, yes.

[C]

It gets better and better.

[D]

Let's go to your next laser story, out of the friendly skies. Yeah.

[C]

I love it here.

[D]

Airlines are always looking for ways to save money. And Southwest is testing a new method that's raising some eyebrows. Their new plan is to only clean premium seats between flights.

[C]

That's actually kind of smart.

[A]

What are you talking about? That's terrible.

[D]

The flight attendants union said they received a memo from the airline about the, quote, experiment they're doing with cleaners coming on board and cleaning just a small portion of the plane.

[C]

Okay, now everyone's gonna be sweeping off goldfish crackers.

[D]

Only if you're in the good seats.

[C]

Oh, yeah, Nevermind.

[D]

So if you're not willing to pay a little extra, you're not just getting leg room. You're getting the dirty tissues in the back seat pocket.

[A]

That's the worst thing when you open that pocket and you're like, oh, God.

[C]

Come on.

[D]

Upon closer examination, it turns out Southwest generally hasn't had cleaners come on planes between flights at all.

[A]

I fly Southwest. You know enough to know that that checks out.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

They rely on flight attendants to tidy the cabin and pick up visible trash. That way they can turn the planes quicker and spend less time on the ground.

[A]

So they have to make rap parodies to do over the PA and clean up the plane on Southwest. That's a lot of work for them.

[D]

Still, the union is encouraging Southwest to clean all of their seats, not just the ones that people pay extra for.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

In a statement, they're likening it to the upper class on the tight Titanic, where you can have cigars and sip brandy up there while the passengers below deck don't get their seats clean.

[A]

I was gonna say any sort of transportation union shouldn't use any sort of Titanic reference.

[D]

This next laser story is out of fast food frenzy. Taco Bell just dropped a new addition to their menu, and it does not have meat or cheese.

[A]

What?

[D]

Repeat, no meat, meat or cheese on the new Taco Bell menu item.

[C]

What the heck is it?

[A]

Vegan?

[D]

Instead, they're dropping a new version of empanadas that are filled with chocolate, fudge and caramel. Yes, yes, yes.

[A]

Oh, my God. Those look amazing. You just passed the pictures around.

[D]

They're appropriately named the new Chocolate Fudge and Caramel Empanadas.

[A]

Wow.

[F]

Clever.

[A]

I like that.

[D]

I'm Showing the picture to the host right now. Brooke, what do you think of it?

[A]

I just want to eat it. Honestly, it looks like little hand pies that are just oozing with goodness.

[D]

So good. The caramel one's apparently salted caramel and the other is a chocolate shell filled with warm chocolate liquid.

[A]

How many comments are we going to get on how we all say caramel differently?

[C]

Yeah, I say grandma.

[A]

Yeah. What do you guys say?

[D]

One person on Instagram commented saying, this is exactly what I need in my life. Deep fried fudge,

[C]

cuz you got the munchies.

[A]

And it's nice because, like, I have one kid who's more of a caramel lover and the other is a chocolate lover.

[D]

So true.

[A]

I get it. To satisfy both of them, you just

[D]

eat one of each.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

And who wants to live to 40 in this modern climate anyway?

[C]

Seriously, Reach.

[D]

Yeah, down the hatch. They're coming out soon and you'll be able to order the pair for only $2.99, which means they're not real. What?

[C]

It's like plastic?

[A]

No, it's fine. It would be delicious.

[E]

Delicious.

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

Cheaper means better. You know that. Let's go to your final laser story out of Tech Trends usa. If you're worried about being filmed without realizing it looking at you, Karen, you're probably gonna want to know about this because there's a new app that alerts you if somebody nearby is wearing smart glasses.

[A]

Can't you just tell there's only one? They always look like a technor.

[D]

Yeah, they're just like the black.

[A]

I called a guy out in the bar the other day for it.

[C]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. He was like, I need them. I'm like, for what? He's like, watch. I can look up a fact. And I'm like, great. I don't care about your World War II facts.

[D]

Man, it's so rich having Brooke with her glasses bully somebody else with their glasses.

[A]

These aren't filming anybody. The fuzziest film ever. Thank you.

[D]

If you didn't know, Google Glass may have have failed a decade ago, but smart glasses overall are making a major comeback.

[C]

Yeah, actually, I think I'm not going to buy a pair.

[D]

And the new ones feature video recording cameras, but they often look pretty indistinguishable from regular eyewear. So the app nearby glasses, that's what it's called, supposedly clues you in. And it constantly scans for signals that emit from Bluetooth enabled devices such as wearable tech by Meta and Snap.

[C]

That's good.

[D]

And they created it. Cause smart Glasses are gonna be increasingly controversial as they become more and more common.

[A]

Yeah, you're never gonna trust anybody wearing glasses anymore. This is bad for me.

[D]

You know, the app's developer calls them, quote, an intolerable intrusion and consent neglecting.

[A]

Yeah, for sure.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

At least when you're holding up a phone, it's obvious that you're filming or taking a picture. With these, you have to tell people, hey, just so you know, I'm filming with my glasses.

[D]

It's like when people would cover up the cameras above their computer screens with, like, a piece of tape. Now you're gonna have to do that over your eyes. I guess others have sort of a different opinion on it. In fact, right now you can subscribe to this guy's only fans to see him wear the smart glasses as he peruses the shoe aisle at Macy's. First person perspective. Yeah, it's a good time. That sound means Laser Stories has come to an end for the day. We'll do it again same time on Monday. You know, you might think that a group of people who've worked in the radio industry.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

On a station that plays music daily. Would actually be familiar with some of it. Oh, you'd be wrong.

[C]

Yeah. I'm just a comedian. I'm not here for you.

[A]

Yeah, we turn it down and talk to each other.

[D]

That's right. You think we're smart and knowledgeable about stuff.

[E]

No.

[A]

No one thought that.

[D]

We're about to prove how unsmart and knowledgeless we truly are.

[A]

God, you can name any segment right now. What's happening.

[C]

That's true.

[D]

Because we're playing a brand new edition of Riffing Around.

[B]

Oh, yes.

[D]

And if you've ever heard it before, there's going to be a new twist to it this time. Will it be easier or somehow even more difficult for my co host to identify some of the most popular music ever?

[C]

And spoiler alert, you're probably better than all of us at this game, guaranteed.

[D]

You're gonna find out when we play coming up right after this. In the entire English dictionary, no two words put instant fear in your soul quite like riffing around. Broken Jeffrey in the Morning. And that's right. And it's time for Riffing Around. Okay, let's go. I play the instrumental of a popular song you've definitely heard before, and my co hosts just have to name it without whining or insulting my manhood. Brooke. And if you don't listen to the beginning of our show, we start every morning with a segment here called Shot Caller. Question of the day.

[A]

Yes.

[D]

So we actually kind of tested this out just a few days ago doing hit songs played by marching bands. It turned out to not be a total train wreck, so we decided to do it here for a marching band version of Riffin Around. We'll play it, you name it. We're gonna start off with the young lady who's a self professed tuba groupie or twopie for short.

[B]

You're not supposed to tell people.

[D]

Name this. Marching Tun.

[B]

The Shrek song that I categorized.

[D]

Yeah, I need the specific name of the song.

[B]

Shape of an olive. All Star

[D]

is right. That's one point for Alexis. Jose, you're gonna get a point if you can name this soundtrack from a very famous movie played marching band style. Oh, there we go.

[C]

Galaxy Defender.

[D]

Oh, you're on

[C]

him.

[D]

Shouting mib definitely was not a huge hint in the beginning.

[C]

I thought that was mit.

[D]

Oh, yeah, the MIT Marching Band.

[A]

I couldn't understand what they were shouting.

[D]

Men in Black by Will Smith from the Men in Black movie. Now we're on to Brooke. I know normally, Brooke, you'd be bullying band geeks before you force them to make out with you underneath the bleachers. So you should definitely recognize this tune. This is the moment you should know it. And Brooke Freeman. What is it, Brooke? You need a guess?

[A]

Is it Aerosmith?

[C]

Need a guess.

[A]

Just jumping up and down a little. Take you away.

[D]

I know. Take you away. It's not it. Alexis, can you steal?

[B]

I thought they're yelling dream on dream.

[D]

Wow, Alexis stealing an Aerosmith song.

[B]

I don't know who I am today.

[D]

We are on to the second round. The score is Alexis. Alexis 2, Jose 1, Brooke, 0. And we're gonna do another movie here for Alexis. You don't even have to know the name of the song this time. Just the title of this famous animated film performed in drumline fashion. What is it?

[B]

Oh, oh, it's the Incredible Alexis.

[D]

You're on fire right now.

[A]

That's incredible. Thank you.

[D]

That is the theme from Incredibles by Pixar. Jose, to earn a point time, you must answer as your phone tap character. Veto.

[A]

O. Hey.

[C]

Okay, I can do that over here.

[D]

So veto. Please name this marching band hit.

[C]

Okay,

[D]

Little bit old school with the music.

[C]

This time I will recognize this. And I'm old school.

[D]

You're the artist.

[C]

Oh, I remember this song. Me and my grandma used to make meatballs. Why we would sing There Ain't no mountain High enough over there.

[A]

That's actually just the voice of Jeff's manhood Right there.

[D]

And Brooke, you were so close. You had the point. You just lost.

[A]

But I couldn't resist.

[C]

I'm proud.

[D]

But Brooke, you do have a chance to win it back. If you can name this one word. Hit. Oh, don't shake your hips like that, please. It's no.

[C]

Oh, I know.

[D]

Lola is a no. Alexis, you have the first chance to steal Cabana. Oh, Jose, can you.

[C]

Copacabana.

[A]

And her name was Lola and she was at the Copacabana.

[D]

Music and passion are always in fashion. Copacabana.

[C]

Rick, you knew too much about it.

[D]

And we're on to the third and final round. Let's recap the score. It's time tied three to three with Jose and Alexis. Brooke with a big fat zero. That means marching band riffing around is on to our final round. The drums are gonna hit harder than Brook's mid morning martinis. Alexis, tell me the name of this song.

[B]

What does he say in the main part?

[D]

Jump it, young man.

[A]

Give it to young man in a seal.

[B]

Oh, it's the ymca.

[C]

Out of nowhere, he comes up with.

[B]

Sorry, I'm singing the song in my head like Jumpman.

[D]

Young men.

[C]

They're young men at the Young Men's Christian Academy.

[D]

I don't know.

[B]

Make more sense if they're jumping.

[D]

Anyway, you did get a point there. So Alexis, you take the lead. Jose, I need to answer this one as your German character, Hans, who definitely blitzed out with his schnitz out to this iconic jam. Name it. What?

[C]

I kind of know it.

[D]

It's building.

[C]

Where is it?

[D]

Brooke, stop dancing like that. I'm gonna take another point away. Too much hand motion. He's doing something.

[A]

What is it?

[D]

Here it is. If you don't get it going.

[C]

Oh, yes it is. I cannot count in German, but it is a final countdown.

[D]

That's right, the final countdown by Europe. That means Jose has tied it up. Yay. Brook has no chance of a comeback. So, Brooke, you're out. And we're going to move right on to a rapid fire tie breaker round between Jose and Alexis. First person to say gets the final point. Name the title.

[C]

Oh, what is.

[D]

Okay, can we turn?

[A]

I feel like I should have continued with my saxophone.

[C]

I don't know. Oh, my God. Take on me.

[D]

Take on me.

[C]

Jose pulls it out of nowhere.

[D]

And the winner of Riffin Around Marching Band edition is. Jose Belanos. Congratulations.

[C]

I didn't go to college for this.

[D]

No, you didn't.

[C]

It's awesome.

[D]

But you do get to hold the Brooke and Jeffrey spirit stick as our official Winner.

[C]

Oh, what is it under the table?

[D]

I'll show you. Tune in next week when we do riffing around finger snaps only edition. I'm Jeff. Hi diddle me me debo. Phone taps Coming up right after this. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. And the other day we got an email from a listener who said she is engaged. And before their wedding they agreed to get couples counseling. Not to resolve like any major issues in the relationship, just to work on good communication leading up to the moment. And who better to help him with that than dynamic duo of Joseph and Carol Benson?

[A]

That's right.

[D]

They've done a prank call before on the show and it's time to bring them back for a brand new phone tap right now. Brooke and Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s.

[G]

Hello.

[D]

Hi, this is Joseph Benson from dynamic Duo Counseling. Is this Andrew?

[G]

Yes, it is.

[D]

Hi, Andrew. I'm also joined on the call by my fabulous and extremely flexible wife, Carol. We're partners in life and in business. Right, honey buns?

[A]

Well, that's right, pookie pants. Hi, Andrew.

[G]

Hey, what is this about?

[D]

Good question. Yeah, let's just dive right in, shall we? Because I have in my notes that you and your fiance Erica are going to be marrying soon. Oh, that's exciting.

[G]

Yeah. In June. Yeah.

[D]

Oh, and apparently she thought it was a good idea if you two both took some couples counseling classes together.

[G]

Yeah. Is that what this is?

[A]

Ding, ding, ding. Andrew, you have found the right place.

[D]

Okay, he is curious and I like it.

[A]

Me too. We should tell him our slogan.

[D]

Oh, let's do that. Fix the fight. Sleep good tonight. Oh,

[G]

okay. Yeah, yeah, that's nice. Sure, but we don't fight. She just wanted to make sure that we had better communication before getting married.

[A]

Oh, perfect. Cuz we have another slogan. Right, teddy bear?

[D]

We sure do, sugar lums. It's no more bicker. Make love quicker, but not too fast.

[G]

Wow, you guys are talented. I mean, you guys can say things at the exact same time.

[A]

That's right.

[D]

Yeah. It's not even rehearsed. We're just so connected on. On like a soul level.

[G]

Oh my gosh.

[A]

My soul is his soul.

[D]

No, my soul's your soul, sweetums.

[F]

Oh.

[D]

What? Andrew, would you like to hear our souls make love over the phone? I'd really rather not.

[A]

Sometimes we can't even stop them.

[D]

Their souls just want to intermesh.

[G]

Right.

[D]

Subscribe to our Patreon and you can watch our souls do their thing.

[G]

No, that's very uncomfortable. Oh, I don't Know what any of this means?

[D]

Listen, I know it's definitely different to be counseled by a duo of couples counselors, but we're just. Just unique.

[A]

That's right.

[D]

We're innovative groundbreakers in the counseling industry.

[A]

I'll let you break my ground.

[G]

Oh, honey, what the hell?

[D]

Wait till the call is over.

[G]

Can we just have the regular ground unbroken?

[D]

Is there.

[G]

Is there an option for.

[D]

Oh, I feel it shaking. Oh, unstable.

[A]

Listen, Andrew, we're going to get you and your fiance to the point. Me and my sugar loaf are at.

[D]

Wouldn't that be nice?

[G]

Yeah, but we don't need to be sugar loaf. We're plenty good with the regular.

[A]

You prefer a sticky bun, huh?

[G]

You know, can we just stay away from all pastries?

[D]

We're just speaking our love language, that's all.

[A]

That's right, honey.

[D]

Right.

[A]

Some people's love language is quality time or words of affirmation.

[D]

Yeah, but ours are baked good euphemisms. Isn't that right, my little sassy scone?

[A]

That's right, dough daddy.

[G]

This isn't really what I thought it was gonna be. You know, the whole nicknames and the talking same time and the snuggle bugs and all this stuff.

[D]

Yes, my little blueberry muffin top.

[A]

His tone's not changing.

[D]

I'm hearing that.

[A]

Let's give him something.

[D]

Okay. Use your words, not angry birds. Chirp, chirp. Over there.

[A]

I bet that did it. Yeah.

[G]

I don't understand how Erica thought this would be productive or beneficial for us.

[A]

He's still not getting it.

[D]

Okay, let's give him one last one. Maybe we'll really get through to him.

[G]

Oh, no, no.

[D]

Please don't. Don't feel small. It's a prank call.

[G]

What?

[D]

Yeah, it's a joke on the radio. We're not couples counseling. We're Brooke and Jeffrey from the radio. Your fiance Erica, set you up?

[G]

Yeah. I was like, what? What did she sign us up for? It wouldn't be the first time. Oh, wait, is she listening? Like. Just kidding, honey.

[D]

Sounds like you're having your own little duo conversation with yourself.

[A]

I can actually see why your fiance thought maybe better communication would be good for you guys.

[D]

Definitely.

[G]

Yeah, well, maybe not that much communication.

[D]

Sounding like an angry bird again. Use your words, not angry Birds.

[G]

Oh, I like that other one. What was it? Big Love Quicker. That was pretty good.

[D]

Okay, you perv.

[C]

Brooke and Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s.

[F]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[D]

When you have a crush, there's certain things that you do not want them to See right away.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Like your awkward middle school photos.

[A]

Oh, no.

[D]

Or your inability to parallel park. Or that Christmas card with your secret family. What? Definitely don't let them see that.

[C]

Oh, my gosh.

[A]

That's a third party date stuff.

[D]

Yeah, well, one of our listeners says she was mortified when her date accidentally saw something that was never intended for his eyes.

[A]

Oh, no.

[D]

She's already apologized multiple times for it, but still needs our help. We're gonna try in your brand new second date update right after this.

[A]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning second date update.

[D]

What would you say is a brave or courageous first date? Skydiving.

[C]

Oh, my gosh.

[A]

See, I was gonna say eating one of those lobster boil things. It's just so messy. Sucking and stuff.

[C]

Oh, you're right.

[D]

I mean, that's sloppy. I don't know if that's necessarily courageous. Yeah, I was thinking more white water rafting.

[A]

Oh.

[D]

Or listening to Brooke and Jeffrey podcast on a Bluetooth speaker in the middle of a Whole Foods while you're on a roller coaster. That takes bravery.

[A]

Why the Whole Foods?

[D]

But I only ask because one of our listeners says she convinced a guy to do something extremely brave for their first date activity, and she's requested our help today. Let's welcome Amy, the brave maker, to the show. Hey, Amy. How you doing?

[F]

Hey, guys. I'm doing good.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

All right. It sounds like you already had the courage to do this.

[F]

Oh, yeah, I do it all the time.

[A]

You do it all the time.

[D]

All right, we'll get to the brave activity that you forced this guy to do, but let's learn about him. Him? Who is he and how'd you meet him?

[F]

So his name is emt, and I met him through a dating app. And so in my profile, I list that I love doing cold plunges.

[C]

Oh, I've heard of those. Like dip in ice water, right?

[F]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Do you like to do it as, like, a health center, or are you going out into the wild and finding some cold water to get into?

[F]

I actually have, like, a cold plunge tube in my back deck.

[D]

Cool.

[C]

You're like Joe Rogan. He's got one of those.

[D]

Yeah, pretty cool. What a great comparison.

[C]

Yeah, Amy's just like Joe Rogan. Guys, come on.

[B]

Compared to, like, a Pilates studio. How about that?

[A]

That feels better.

[D]

How flattering. So that was your first date activity? How did that come up?

[F]

Yeah, so that's kind of how he approached me. Messaging me. He was like, I don't think I have the cajones to do a Cold plunge.

[A]

Like, on a first date, you're like, challenge accepted.

[F]

Yeah, I was like. It kind of sparked a flirty conversation, and I was like, I do it all the time. You get used to it. And he would be totally fine.

[C]

See, this is kind of cute because even someone like me, who would never do this, like, if a girl was like, I challenge you, like, for our date, I would do it.

[F]

Yeah, right.

[C]

And to bond and, like, get out of your comfort zone.

[F]

Exactly. And it was just like, it was really friendly competition kind of pushing back and forth. And he was like, oh, that's more of a second or third date thing.

[C]

No, that's funny.

[A]

That's funny. So wait, did you invite him over to your house then? Since you have, I don't know, a bucket at your house filled with ice, I don't know what you got.

[F]

That's exactly what it is. And then I totally convinced him to do it after a little bit of light pushing.

[A]

I'm sorry. I feel like the bravest part of this is you inviting a guy from a dating app straight to your house,

[C]

telling him to bring a swimsuit.

[F]

Oh, well, you know, I do the girl thing. I tell people. I. You know what I mean?

[D]

Like, yeah, you make him very aware that there are cameras on site and anything that happens will be recorded.

[C]

I've already pressed 9 1. I have one more digit and I will call the police on you.

[D]

So you be chilling. Okay. So you convinced him to do it?

[F]

Yeah, yeah, he came over. You know, I got us some liquid courage, and I did it first to show him, like, not full of it. I'm not a baby. I can totally do it. Put my money where my mouth is now.

[D]

He has to.

[F]

And then, yeah, then he went for it.

[D]

Wow. And how did it go?

[F]

I was really impressed. I mean, when he got in, he totally screamed. Highest pitch scream I think I've ever heard, but he totally did it. And, you know, we dried off, laughed about it. Just like, grab my portable heater and watch the movie. It was. It was a really nice date.

[A]

It sounds actually pretty romantic.

[F]

Yeah, it was really great. It was really up there for top dates. And like, after a bit, we just, like, hugged and he left. And I felt really great about it. And. And then I did something kind of stupid. Oh, yeah. Like, after he left, I thought it went really well, so I was like, oh, well, I'm gonna send a picture to my friends because I think this might go somewhere.

[D]

You're right, he's pre approved.

[A]

Like, not a. Yeah, not a sneaky. Picture that you took. A picture that you grabbed from his dating profile, right?

[F]

Oh, yeah, from his profile pic.

[D]

Okay, I don't think he want to send a picture of the guy straight out of the cold plunge.

[F]

That's not going to be an emotion. No, no, kinder than that. I know how things work.

[D]

Okay, so how do you mess that up?

[F]

Yeah, I accidentally sent it to him instead of my friends.

[A]

Wait.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

What did the message say?

[C]

Oh, my gosh.

[F]

It wasn't bad. I was just like, look at this cutie. I got him to go in the cold pl. And I followed up. I was like, hey, I'm so sorry. I was trying to send to my friends because you're so cute.

[C]

I wish you said cutie. That is cringe. Sending a picture.

[A]

Don't you think you'd be flattered?

[C]

I mean. Yeah, I guess.

[A]

She's showing you off already. She's excited about you.

[B]

As long as he's into her equally, you know, if he wasn't into her.

[A]

And then that happens.

[B]

I feel like it's a turn off.

[D]

That's a good point. I mean, how did he respond to it?

[F]

I thought he was into me, but then I got like, no response from him. And then like even the next day I wrote, I'm really sorry. Would you forgive me? It was just. It was a mistake. And I still didn't get an answer. I haven't gotten any answers since.

[C]

Wow. I mean, you put stuff on social media. It's not like he was hiding that.

[A]

And it's not like you were saying anything explicit or the cutie helps you. Yeah, I mean, you guys had just joked so much prior to that. It seems like he could have laughed it off.

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

Or you've come off as a totally superficial person that only cares for him about his cute looks.

[A]

Jeff.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Saw him get out of a cold plunge.

[A]

Yeah, no way.

[B]

He was looking good.

[F]

And what I don't get is like, towards the end of the date, I felt we hit it off. It felt like we were gonna have a second date. It just. It felt really good. And I'm usually not like, delusional about these things.

[C]

That's like why you were sending it to your friends. Like I said, he's like pre approved now you gotta show him off to everybody. Hey, what do you think of him?

[D]

Yeah, well, we'll see how delusional you really are or aren't when we come back. We'll give you the full Delulu test when we do your second date update and call Emmett right after this Brooke

[A]

and Jeffrey in the morning second date update.

[D]

Oof, talk about an awkward ending. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning because our listener Amy had a solid first date with a guy that she liked named Emmett. In fact, went so well they were already planning their next hangout when Amy, quote, and these are her words, screwed it all up. Cause she meant to send Emmett's profile pic to some of her girlfriends, trying to show him off a little bit, but instead sent it straight to him, probably with a bunch of heart, eyes and pickle emojis underneath because I know how you ladies do.

[A]

Pickle, huh?

[D]

So immediately the bumps on it. Yeah, I know. I've seen Brooks texts. They are weird. So immediately she sent him an apology and explained what happened. Got no response. And now her fate lies in our cell. Couple hands. Amy. Would you prefer to go by the name Shamy for the next few minutes? Because I do feel the shame for you. We're just joking.

[A]

I mean, I think it's an innocent mistake. We've all done something really stupid like that before. Like for him to not understand it and not respond, like that kind of sucks.

[C]

Yeah.

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

But you also understand that it's a little bit creepy to be sent photos of yourself. Yeah, that's.

[B]

You don't think all girls do that? Then you're stupid.

[A]

I know, I'm Alexis on that. I get so excited when I get a text from my girlfriends after the go out with somebody.

[C]

But I think that's the thing. We all know everybody does it, but to see it happen, it's just like kind of jarring.

[D]

Yeah, it could freak you out.

[A]

So it should be flattering that that's just how we have to paint it.

[D]

Okay, Brooke, you tell him that.

[B]

I will.

[D]

You should be flattered.

[A]

You should be.

[D]

Okay, we're going to see if he even answers the phone, but I'm going to dial his number right now. Let's do it. You ready, Amy?

[F]

I'm ready.

[D]

Okay, here we.

[C]

Go.

[G]

Hello?

[D]

Hey, is this Emmett?

[G]

Yeah, this is Emmett. This is.

[D]

Hey, man. This is a radio show called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning.

[A]

What's up, Emmett? The whole show's here, man.

[D]

How you doing?

[G]

What's going on?

[A]

You sound like a fun loving guy.

[D]

Just calling our fans. Not much, bro.

[C]

We're not.

[D]

Yeah, no, we're kidding. By the way, this is part of a segment that we're doing. It's called the Second Date Update. We do have a reason calling you.

[G]

The only date I've gone on here recently would be this lady named Amy is that you're calling about?

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[G]

Wow.

[D]

Wow.

[A]

Offer it up to us.

[C]

You're helping us here.

[D]

A lady?

[A]

Yeah.

[G]

Oh, my.

[D]

Sounds like you are hot for her.

[A]

What a coincidence.

[D]

That is funny, because Amy is the person who reached out to us wanting to get a hold of you.

[G]

Okay.

[D]

Because according to her, you have not been really talking to her at all, all since your date.

[G]

That would be correct, yes.

[A]

Is there a reason?

[D]

Because Amy thinks there might be a reason.

[G]

I'd be curious to know what that reason is.

[A]

Oh, what she thinks. Well, it feels like it should be obvious.

[D]

Yeah. She told us that after the date, she was happy with how things went.

[A]

And excited.

[D]

Very excited. And wanted to show a photo of you to some of her girlfriends. Right.

[G]

She sent me my own picture.

[D]

Yeah. So she thinks maybe that weirded you out and scared you you away.

[G]

It was a little strange. I mean, not sure how much she told you, but the picture was, like, altered.

[C]

No, she got it from your socials.

[D]

Yeah. Like, screenshotted it off your page, off your dating app.

[G]

Right. I mean, I. I know the picture she got it from, but it looked weird. It was, like, different.

[B]

Wait, do you have an Android? Is this an iPhone to Android?

[G]

Probably.

[D]

There's, like a green bubble behind it. I didn't understand.

[A]

It's all grainy videos, really funny. Is that it?

[G]

No, it wasn't that. I. I compared the two pictures. It made me look, like, 20 pounds lighter.

[A]

What? Oh, wait, I thought you were gonna say, like, she put a cool filter on it, like she made you skinny.

[G]

Yeah, I looked a lot skinnier. My chin has never looked so narrow in my life.

[C]

Hey, look at you. Strong chin.

[D]

That's a good thing, right?

[A]

That has to be some mistake.

[D]

Like, why.

[C]

Why would you Photoshop or whatever she did?

[D]

I'm with you. It's weird. What are you thinking?

[G]

I don't know. Maybe she aied the thing or something. Ran it through some kind of filter or something.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[D]

Why would she do that, though?

[A]

Maybe she wanted to make him look hotter for her friends.

[D]

But she's not a superficial person, Brooke.

[A]

Maybe. I mean, there are some friend groups that get weird with each other. And competitive.

[D]

Yeah, I mean, I can understand how that would make you feel. Weird?

[G]

Yeah, I mean, I'm not like, an ogre or something. Something.

[A]

That's, like, so insulting. I would be really insulted.

[D]

But, you know, it'd make you probably feel really weird is if I told you that Amy was, like, secretly listening in on this phone call just so she could hear your explanation for avoiding her. That would be weird, right?

[C]

You want to talk to her?

[D]

Because that is kind of what's happening.

[G]

She's listening to this.

[D]

Yeah, that's how it works.

[G]

Okay, well, I want to know what's up. Why is she enhancing me? What's going on?

[D]

I'm telling you, she's listening right now. And you can ask. Ask her that.

[G]

Amy, are you there?

[F]

Yeah, yeah.

[G]

What is going on?

[F]

I mean, look, I feel like everybody can use a little, like, help looking better. The filters are there. I just kind of wanted to show what your potential could be.

[C]

Oh, it was not.

[F]

Hey, not 20 pounds. It was, like, 10 to 15 max.

[D]

Oh, okay, you're overreacting.

[G]

I'm overreacting? And the additional tan that you gave my skin.

[D]

Oh, he was tan.

[B]

Hey, that's kind of nice.

[G]

Oh, yeah.

[F]

I mean, it's just beach boy. It's just a tan. I mean, it's just a tan. It's not like I changed your nose or anything. I didn't do anything, like, crazy permanent. It's nothing that you couldn't do if you worked out more, put in a little bit more effort.

[D]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Try to defend you and say, like, maybe this is something that you think is normal because you do it to your own pictures.

[F]

Well, doesn't everybody put, like, your zoom filter on when you're on. You know what I mean? I mean, like.

[D]

Brooke, what are you saying? That you're exactly against self improvement? That you don't want. You don't think people could get any better than they actually are?

[A]

Self improvement is something that you do to improve yourself, not something you do to improve someone else, whether they like it or not.

[D]

Sometimes you need to be shoved into self improvement.

[F]

I mean, it was all tiny. It was like the skin. It was a minimal amount of, like, weight loss and, like. And just, like, a slight whitening of the teeth, and it was.

[A]

It.

[D]

Oh, teeth whitening.

[C]

See?

[G]

Whitens my freaking teeth.

[F]

Well, I mean, just a little bit. I mean, your teeth are really straight, so it's not like I had to do a bunch of stuff. And, like, I mean, other than that, your teeth are perfect.

[A]

Other than that. That is not the compliment you think it is, Amy.

[F]

Yeah, I mean, I'm just trying to be honest.

[D]

I mean, and all these improvements are so much cheaper when you do them on Photoshop and not in real life, I think so.

[C]

True.

[A]

Amy, were you attracted to him, or were you actually hoping that these changes would happen if you started dating?

[F]

I was Definitely attracted to him, but I do a lot to take care of myself. Hence, cold plunge. And yeah, I would hope that somebody would take care of themselves the way that I did if I were in a relationship with them. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. It's always good to start something where you just totally want to change the other person.

[D]

Emmett, do you feel loved right now?

[G]

I don't know what to think right now. This is just the weirdest thing ever.

[D]

Listen, Amy is taking a big risk here. She didn't have to say that she whitened your teeth, but she sees the potential in you and your teeth. That should be inspiring.

[G]

She did have to confess, though, she sent me the picture.

[A]

Right. Emmett, you deserve someone who likes you for you.

[D]

Crickets from the room. Okay, so look, I believe that any woman who goes through that much trouble. I'm guessing it took at least an hour and a half to Photoshop and AI all the bad stuff out of your phone, and she did that for you. And that level of dedication deserves a second chance, if you ask me. If you say yes, we will pay for another date with her.

[G]

I don't know. I would be embarrassed to ever be seen in front of her. Friends are gonna be like, this doesn't look anything like this guy.

[D]

But if you put in the work, then you won't have to be embarrassed.

[A]

Why are you inviting this man to run into all these red flags?

[D]

Because the photo sounds really hot.

[C]

Yeah, I didn't think about that, though. Her friends are gonna have an image of you in their head, right?

[G]

It's gonna be, like, shallow how, but in real life.

[D]

Look, Emmett, if you say know, at least, hey, now you have a better dating picture profile. You can lure more women in.

[A]

Do not catfish people with that.

[D]

It's him. Just the better version.

[G]

Like a free head shot, I guess. Well, you know, you spin it that way, I guess.

[D]

Look there. It's up to you, man. You want to see Amy one more time, we'll pay.

[F]

If it makes you feel better, send, like, the original photo to my friend.

[C]

Include him in the group chat. Include him?

[A]

Why do I not believe you? The way you say no.

[F]

I mean, like, I'll have him with me when I do it. Like, I swear I wasn't trying to make him feel bad. That photo was not for him. I just.

[A]

Okay, okay. Don't let him see the responses from your friends, because I have a feeling they're not going to be very nice.

[D]

Well, we still need to hear from Emmett. Is it a yes or no?

[G]

Regretfully, I'm going to Say yes. Because, Emmett, I don't exactly have a lot of matches right now on my algorithms, so

[D]

this is true love.

[A]

I feel like this is the rock bottom, Jeff.

[F]

So I know we did the cold plunge first date, and I think second date, tanning.

[D]

Oh, my God, you're speaking Alexis's love language.

[G]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Third day dental office.

[D]

Yeah. Lucky you.

[F]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[D]

Man, you try to show someone their true potential and you get blasted for it.

[A]

Dude, I don't think we went hard enough. I mean, that's so messed up.

[C]

It is messed up. Like in the weirdest way, trying to find the Light initiative. She was like, this is what you could be. I want to inspire potential.

[A]

If a guy sent a photo of me to his buddies that were I was skinnier and hotter with bigger boobs, I would be so pissed.

[D]

You know what?

[C]

Now that you say that, you're right. It's a double. There's no way.

[D]

I've seen pictures of your mom though, Brooke, so I feel. I'm just saying. Amy never told us that she was going to do that, so I think the whole room was absolutely surprised. But I did have some conversations with her and told her that she could do our photos on our website. Oh. Because I think we could all improve. So head over to our podcast. You might see an updated photo already with our skin a little bit tanner, teeth a little bit whiter.

[C]

Oh, my gosh. Please don't make Ashton any skinnier. Dude, be a piece of paper.

[A]

It's like I'm finally doing Botox again.

[D]

Go find it. Subscribe to our podcast at. Brooke and Jeffrey.

[F]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[D]

I made a decision this year. Year. I am done being the side character in my own life.

[A]

What? Why would you not be the main

[B]

character in your own life?

[D]

Exactly, Brooke. No more of that.

[C]

I don't get it.

[D]

No more. Whatever you guys want to do, I'm fine with it. Okay, no more. Brooke picks out my lunch and pays for it. Now I'm going to pick out my own lunch and have her pay for it.

[A]

Why do I still pay for it?

[D]

What I'm saying is, I just realized it. It's all about mce.

[A]

What's that?

[D]

Main Character Energy.

[A]

Oh, okay. Bring it, Jeffrey.

[D]

I am bringing that MCE for a brand new Sow Song of the week. And this main character's gonna do what I wanna do.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[D]

And that's warm up a biscotti in the microwave for 10, maybe even 15 seconds.

[A]

Whoa.

[D]

Before I do. Yeah, I am A rebel.

[C]

Brooke, you heat him up. Biscotti.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I like this new Jeffrey.

[D]

I'm going for it with my brand new song of the weep coming 10.

[A]

Ooh.

[D]

That's a man. Damn right.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Who said that?

[A]

You said.

[D]

I sure did. Main character song of the week. Right after this, it's time for my song of the week. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. And you may not see this in the news because there's a few kind of bigger issues going on right now, but something that is flying under the radar is right now, at this moment in history, the pizza wars between the big boys are more tense than ever.

[A]

Dude, how many food wars are happening right now? I just saw something about burger wars and all those CEOs going back and forth.

[C]

Team Burger King on that one.

[D]

None are as big as the pizza wars, though. I'm talking about Pizza Hut, Domino's, Papa John's, and Little Caesars.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Even though fast food sales in general are slumping nationwide, somehow pizza keeps on growing.

[C]

It's timeless, baby.

[D]

It's so good. Domino's just reported they made $1.54 billion in revenue last year.

[C]

And they were struggling for a while, remember?

[D]

Yeah. And that's B. Billy Goats billion.

[C]

That is crazy.

[A]

They somehow still need to raise their prices.

[C]

Yeah, totally.

[D]

Well, and the other guys, they're not doing too bad either. They opened about 6, 700 new locations around the world in 2025 alone.

[A]

Oh, wow. Pizza is like the cheapest thing to make.

[C]

Like, Starbucks is, like, shutting down all their locations. These guys are growing.

[D]

Pizza's thriving. And how are they doing it? By being innovators, duh. They've got double XL New York style pizzas, hot honey nacho stuffed crust pizzas, jalapeno pizza, popper party packs, and meal deals for literally every hour of the day.

[A]

Day.

[D]

Do you want a 2am Cinnamon twist pizza with extra ravioli for $3 off?

[E]

Done.

[D]

They've got a deal for that.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

And it makes it kind of hard as a true pizza lover, to pick. Which one do I order from? You're all so good with so many options.

[A]

I don't know.

[D]

So that's why I knew I had to sing a song in honor of the ongoing and ever growing pizza wars in America.

[A]

Oh, man, this is gonna make me hungry.

[C]

Texting your favorite. By the way, I want to hear.

[D]

Instead of doing the classic by Queen, Another one bites the dust. It's Young Jeffries. Another one stuffs the crust.

[A]

I'll never sing the song again.

[D]

The same. You know what? I hear you Brooke, that this might make you hungry. So just to make sure that my in studio co host audience is 100 focused I got you guys pizza Domino's is here.

[C]

Dude, what?

[B]

Is this real?

[C]

Let's give him a T. Here, here.

[D]

Oh my gosh. Thanks bro.

[E]

Yummy.

[C]

Can we do the song later? Jeff?

[D]

I'm hungry. This is the most excited you guys have ever been about a song of the week before. I'm still going to sing so if you guys want to pay attention or not, that's fine.

[A]

This is so good.

[D]

So I'm going to point when I'm ready. Here we go. Points. In a world where pizza deals keep getting bigger, toppings getting wilder and no promotion is too outrageous this summer, four chains battle for total pizza domination. Hot dog fingers scrolling the uber eats. Which deep dish I want mo Pizza Hut pies are loaded with meats but so are the dominoes hot and ready. Hey, for a pint of the lips Little Caesar's got the one that I need. I like my ladies like my brain sticks hot and kind of crazy. Yeah. Another one bites the crust at the Pentagon after dusk. And another deal's on mini cinnamon buns. A mix and match. Seven bucks. Yeah. Hey, they'll let you choose any two. I'm falling in pizza lust. Yummy. Hi, can I order the triple decker ultimate supreme pizza apocalypse infinite feast box? I've got a $5 coupon code. Why do you think I met this? Papa John's eating tubs of garlic sauce. I ate all the boneless wings that

[C]

they had and licked inside of the

[D]

box Cuz I'm hungry for a wheel of food on a pulsing blanket of cheese.

[C]

Deliver them like in a Pixar Flip

[D]

a little piece of wall E another one stops the crust cuz they fill it at random junk like a little hot dogs and Mac and cheese balls

[C]

with a sprinkle of cheeto dust.

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

Hey, you probably walk weird too if Papa John stuffed your crust.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Also can I get the early bird avalanche ranch double heart stuffer cheese NATO bowl for one? Or could I get it with double meatballs and an extra easy breezy cheesy sauce? Gold Caesars got the crazy pups I'm double dipping. Hello. I would like to send my girlfriend a Valentine's day heart shaped pepperoni passion pizza. Can you spell her name in pepperonis and put a note that says you're the marinara to my mozzarella? And when I get home I want to dunk my breadsticks with you all night long.

[C]

Can you read that back to me?

[D]

A Pizza Hut deal for lunch. Papa Go ideas for a midday munch?

[C]

Do dinner with the Caesar's crunch after Domino's Sunday brunch.

[D]

Wait, is that a Pizza Hut pepperoni pool float with a built in heated pizza pouch. I need to get that. I bought a case of the perfume brand so I can smell like a calzone. I've been merging like a nurgin on the pizza glasses and pizza catch pillows. Yeah, they got your booze humming Domino's 2 Papa John's got chaperones But I

[C]

wanna know which pizza wins When Ninja

[D]

Turtles hungry for cheese.

[C]

Stop coming.

[D]

Another one bites the crust. A kid's birthdays, it's a must when little league's done Any celebration Brisweez lights it up.

[C]

Yeah. Hey, and if you're desperate, dude, Sbarro's

[D]

got New York stuff. Authentic

[C]

happy pizza wars, everyone.

[A]

My new favorite song of the week.

[C]

That's great.

[D]

You're just saying that because of the free food.

[A]

Well, could I, like, put a request in for what food will you want to sing about next week? Should we get another delivery? The fry war is heating up, is it not?

[D]

I will get on it just to make sure that you guys are fed for the rest of our time here.

[A]

That was great.

[D]

That was your song of the week. You could text into 78592 and tell us what you thought. We're gonna post the video up on all of our socials with all the lyrics there on our TikTok, our Instagram, our Facebook so you can watch Brooke eat pizza during the song.

[A]

Talking so much so I can just get back to this life.

[D]

All right, we'll leave so that we

[F]

can feast Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[D]

Amanda is joining us. She's a nurse mare manager. And I've always wondered, do the things that happen on Grey's Anatomy actually happen in real life? Oh, yeah.

[C]

I don't know, Jeff.

[A]

All the time, there's always bombs implanted into other people's bodies.

[E]

Singing episodes.

[D]

Yeah. Amanda, who's your hospital's McDreamy and have you seen them in a broom closet recently?

[F]

Oh, gosh, I can't say that on the radio.

[A]

So there is something and everybody knows it.

[D]

Oh, my God. Why is it so steamy in this grill closet?

[F]

Sore subject. Talking about McSteamy.

[A]

Oh.

[D]

Oh, well, I was bringing up McDreamy,

[F]

but there you go.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Why does Jeffrey make every conversation awkward?

[D]

That wasn't even me.

[F]

Yeah, that was definitely me. Sorry.

[A]

About that.

[D]

Okay, we'll bring it back. Brooke is already marching out of the studio so we can get to the game. You got 30 seconds to answer as many questions as possible. If you don't know when you could say pass. But you have to beat her outright if you want to win. Are you. You ready?

[A]

I am.

[D]

Good luck. Your time starts now. What famous American said the quote, that's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind?

[F]

Neil Armstrong.

[D]

What's the cooking technique term called when cutting shrimp in half? Long ways? Flay name the scientific term for someone who eats both meat and vegetables.

[F]

Vegetables? I don't know.

[D]

What do you call a scientist who studies earthquakes? Seismologist of any land animal. What bird has the largest eye in the world?

[F]

Ostrich.

[D]

There we go. Amanda, well done. Brooks gonna rejoin us back in the studio. And I did hear, Amanda, from our producer that you have a seven year old and unfortunately she had to get a cast recently.

[C]

Oh no.

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

What happened? Tell us about the incident. And what percentage do you blame yourself for it?

[F]

Only a little bit. It. So she. She fell off her scooter? Yeah, she broke her thumb just this weekend.

[C]

So she can't suck her thumb. If I broke my thumb, that would ruin me.

[A]

How long did it take you to realize it was broken? Cuz I've talked to moms who were like, we went two days and we had no idea it was broken.

[C]

The swelling just.

[A]

I feel terrible.

[F]

No, it was. It was pretty quick. Her thumb was literally crooked. So

[A]

I mean, that's good that you knew. Yeah, but I don't mean mean that that's good that it was cricket.

[C]

Yeah, no one was annoying. Hairline fractures.

[F]

Yeah, I'm also a nurse, so that helps too, you know.

[C]

Oh, wow. You could have, but you snapped it back into place.

[A]

My mom was an emt and that's usually the worst amount of attention you get. Yeah, I've seen like, are you decapitated? Then don't come to me.

[F]

Yeah, we. We tend to minimize things.

[D]

Yeah, tell her that Jeffrey, Jose, Jake and Ashton all wish her the very, very best. Absolutely. All the guys on the show. Show are supportive of Lucy and her recovery.

[C]

Brooke, what about you?

[D]

Brooke wishes her mid.

[C]

You know, not a slow recovery, but not a quick one.

[A]

Yeah, having a cast as a kid is kind of cool.

[D]

See, she wants you to know, she

[C]

wants you to really experience it and

[A]

you could use it as a weapon on the playground.

[D]

What a role model you are to everyone in our society.

[C]

Don't hurt people now.

[D]

It's Time to answer some questions for trivia. Are you ready, bro?

[A]

Yes.

[D]

Your time starts now. What famous American said the quote, that's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind?

[A]

Neil Armstrong.

[D]

What's the cooking technique term called when cutting shrimp in half long ways?

[A]

Flambe.

[D]

Name the scientific term for someone who eats both meat and vegetables.

[A]

Omnivore.

[D]

What do you call a scientist who studies earthquakes?

[A]

Seismologist.

[D]

Of any land animal. What bird has the largest eye in the world?

[A]

Ostrich.

[D]

What fruit was once called the Persian apple?

[A]

The pear.

[D]

We'll see if any of those answers were right. Let's go to the scoreboard to see how you bolted in just a second. We're gonna stall for a quick minute.

[A]

Score keepers are conferring.

[D]

Yeah, this is a very, very different.

[A]

They're on the sidelines looking at the replay. And.

[D]

And the counting is finished.

[E]

We figured out what comes after three.

[D]

Okay, good. Let's go to the the scoreboard with Jose. Another proverbs balanos.

[C]

Amanda, you got three correct today.

[D]

Sweet.

[C]

And after we had to redact from Brook's score.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[C]

Brooke got four correct.

[D]

Oh, Amanda.

[C]

Sorry.

[D]

Was not enough. Today, let's go over the answers. The famous Americana said, that's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind would be Neil Arnold Armstrong. Yeah. Stepping onto the moon. The cooking technique term, when you cut a shrimp in half long ways, that's called butterflying.

[C]

You look like a little butterfly.

[D]

You know, butterfly, shrimp. The scientific term for someone who eats meat and vegetables is an omnivore.

[A]

That's me.

[D]

Scientists who study earthquakes are called seismologists. The ostrich has the largest eye in the world of any land animal, not just birds.

[A]

Take that, squid.

[D]

And the fruit once known as the Persian apple is peaches because it was shaped like an apple, but light pink and sweeter.

[C]

Tried to give you that one.

[A]

Should have called it hairy apple.

[D]

Yeah, well, I'm sorry Amanda wasn't enough today. But just for playing, we are going to give you a family four pack of tickets to Hot Wheels Monster Trucks live glowing fire on Sunday, May 31. Get ready for more heat and action as Hot Wheels brings the ultimate monster truck show to fans at angel of the Winds Arena, May 30th and May 31st.

[F]

Oh, that's perfect. That's awesome. Thanks so much.

[C]

Give Lucy a hug for us and

[D]

a big thumbs up from Brooke. Just a bragging one. Yeah, for sure.

[F]

Thank you, guys.

[A]

Take that, seven year old.

[D]

Come back and play again soon. We'll do. Winbrook's Bucks same time on Monday.

[F]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.