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Brooke
Hey, we got a brand new full hour for you. Thank you so much for being here. And Jeff's song of the week may inspire you.
Jeffrey
Yeah.
Brooke
To get a little something done. While you listen, you'll find out why. Coming up, A new second date. Did I already say that?
Alexis
I don't know anymore.
Brooke
Sometimes I don't know if I'm glitching or not. So thanks for being here. I think I already said that, too. Get to the comments.
Eric
Go.
Brooke
Alexis, I don't know if this is
Alexis
gonna help because Axel said. Wait. Brooke and Jeff are not dating?
Brooke
Oh, God.
Jeffrey
Yeah, people think that a lot.
Brooke
Or you're married. I know. I don't know if it's because of just a lot of radio people being married.
Jeffrey
Yeah, I think that's normally the people and the people are dating.
Alexis
Or people think your husband and Jeff look kind of similar.
Jeffrey
That's all they do, look similar.
Jose
Yeah.
Jeffrey
You guys go Google Brooke's husband.
Brooke
He loves when people do that. Yeah, he really loves it. He loves to be in the spotlight. Oh, yeah.
Jeffrey
At least we know behind the scenes that when Michael gets too old, you can, you know, just a few years younger, you can just.
Brooke
I'm good. Yeah, no, I like version 1.0 the best.
Ashton
I know.
Brooke
All right, here we go. Brand new. Full hour starts right now.
Host Jeff
Snitches may get stitches.
Brooke
Yeah.
Host Jeff
But freaks get our hero of the week. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Jeffrey
I thought heroes got those.
Host Jeff
Today's hero is a man in Austria named Malta Dunser. He calls himself, quote, the king of the freaks.
Brooke
Oh, hey.
Alexis
Oh, hey.
Brooke
Malta.
Host Jeff
Not just on his Tinder bio, but everywhere. Cause he has a special party trick that he likes to do that just broke a Guinness World Record. One I've personally never heard of before.
Brooke
That's cool. I love a good party trick.
Host Jeff
The record, most balloons passed through the nose and out the mouth in one minute.
Jeffrey
I don't like that I've seen this done before.
Brooke
Do you use the same balloon or do you use different balloons?
Jose
Good question.
Host Jeff
Different balloons.
Brooke
And they're clean every time.
Host Jeff
I should mention they're deflated balloons.
Brooke
That's a good point.
Host Jeff
Yeah. If they were inflated, it'd be even more impressive.
Jeffrey
Oh, my gosh.
Host Jeff
He shoves the balloon empty up his nostril and then pulls it out of his mouth.
Alexis
I don't think we needed photos of this, Jaz.
Host Jeff
I think just the mental image is handful.
Jeffrey
There's a before and after picture you
Brooke
don't think you'd swipe right on this guy.
Host Jeff
And in one minute, he successfully did it 10 times.
Brooke
Why have I never done this but still feel like I could beat it?
Host Jeff
How did he discover he even had these balloon skills? Yeah, most likely on some trip to Colombia. I don't think we really want to know. But I'm guessing he also holds holds the record for the most children's birthday party someone's been asked to leave. Yeah. He says he tried out several different types of balloons till he found a version that slid through him the easiest.
Alexis
Oh, he's committed.
Jeffrey
Fun thing to say.
Brooke
Are you allowed to grease him up beforehand?
Host Jeff
He did grease them up.
Brooke
Oh, he did.
Host Jeff
With olive oil.
Brooke
These are the important questions.
Jeffrey
Olive oil, a Bono.
Host Jeff
I just imagine him going to Party City though one day and being like, I have an interesting question. I can't imagine how the employees react.
Brooke
Do you think that he picks a certain color, like. Cause it fits his vibe.
Host Jeff
He did all sorts of different colors for this. But thanks to his incredible balloon snorting world record, we are proud to make Malta our new hero of the week.
Brooke
Way to go, Malta.
Host Jeff
Bravo, sir. Now it's on to the shot caller question of the day, where I'm going to pass the microphone through my nose to our digital producer, Jake. There you go.
Jose
Well, today really should be a federal holiday. Cause it's Mariah Carey's birthday, she has no age.
Jeffrey
The diva herself.
Jose
That means somewhere right now, a high pitched whistle note just shattered a wine glass for no reason. And a Christmas song just made another billion dollars in the middle of March.
Vanessa
Oh, wow.
Host Jeff
Good for her.
Jose
But how well do you really know the Queen of Divas? Sure, you've butchered her songs in the shower for decades, but do you really appreciate her? We're gonna find out during a special All I want for trivia is clues edition of plenty of 20. Say a number. One through 20. I'll give you a multiple choice question about Mariah Carey and her extraordinary life. You just have to answer correctly to stay in the game. All right, let's start with the woman who first learned about Mariah through her performance as Mayor McCaskill in the Lego Batman movie. That's Alexis.
Alexis
Am I supposed to understand? Okay, anyways, three.
Jose
Before becoming a superstar, Mariah Carey had some very normal jobs. Which one did she actually have? Was she A, a waitress, B, a coat check girl, or C, a dressed up elf for mall Santa?
Jeffrey
The irony.
Alexis
I know that would be perfect. That's why I think Jake made it up.
Brooke
Or the inspiration.
Ashton
Mmm.
Alexis
Coat check girl. I mean, if you work at like a Fancy event center for sure they would have you up front doing it if you're pretty. I'm going to go coat check girl.
Host Jeff
Yeah, interesting.
Jose
Waitresses can't be pretty.
Alexis
They can.
Brooke
I heard the same thing. Jake.
Jose
Coat check girl is correct.
Jeffrey
Offensive, but correct.
Jose
Yeah, which is all that matters because we're moving on to Brooke. Alexis. Got that right. Brooke, I need a number, please.
Brooke
Oh, I bet Mariah's favorite number. Actually, don't know. We'll go seven.
Jose
Might be spoiling my questions. Brooke. Mariah Carey is known for her insane whistle notes. But roughly how many octaves can she sing? Is it 5, 7 or 12? And being able to communicate with dolphins.
Brooke
How many octaves can a normal person sing? I don't actually know. I don't know what Jeff.
Host Jeff
I think the average person is like three to four octaves.
Brooke
Okay, so even five would be impressive.
Host Jeff
Five is still like wow.
Brooke
Okay. And seven would be 12. Oofta. 12 feels impressive. Let's go 12. Let's go the highest.
Jose
Brooke wants a dozen.
Host Jeff
She can't have it.
Jose
I'm sorry, it's seven.
Host Jeff
I don't think there's even 12 octaves on a piano.
Brooke
I don't know, maybe she had a really long piano.
Jose
Jose, we're over to you. 3 and 7 are off the board.
Host Jeff
11.
Jose
In 2001, Mariah decided to bankroll a movie based on her life. Currently it sits at 6% on the rotten tomato meter. What was the name of this ill fated film? Was it Butterfly Dreams through the Rain Glitter or Turner and Hooch?
Jeffrey
Wasn't that with Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson?
Brooke
No, Turner and Hooch was Tom Hanks.
Jeffrey
I think it's the first. You know what? I think it's glitter and my heart is screaming glitter right now.
Jose
You should get that looked at after I give you that point. Glitter is the movie.
Host Jeff
Only 6% of Rotten Tomatoes.
Brooke
We should all watch it.
Jeffrey
That would be a fun watch. Yeah, if we could last.
Jose
It's Mariah Carey's birthday, so we're doing Mariah trivia. Alexis has gotten hers right, Brooke got hers wrong, Jose got his right. And we're over to Jeffrey, please. Jeffrey. A number, sir?
Host Jeff
Jeffrey will take number two.
Jose
What nickname does Mariah Carey use for her fan base? Is it the Lambs, The Butterflies or Mariah's Minions?
Jeffrey
Kind of cute though.
Jose
Despicable.
Host Jeff
Mimi, I mean, not to hate on her, but these aren't as clever fan nicknames as we hear from most of the other artists.
Jeffrey
Yeah, like Beyhives, Arianators.
Host Jeff
Okay, Lambs they're not kosher, so I'm gonna say no to that one. Butterflies. I'm not sure if they're kosher, so I'm gonna keep them in the game.
Brooke
I don't think we're eating butterflies.
Host Jeff
Well, maybe you aren't not supposed to. Mariah's minions. It just sounds the lamest. I have to go in right in the middle with butterflies.
Jose
Butterflies. I'm sorry. The lambs. Really what Mariah calls her fan base.
Host Jeff
They're very sweet people.
Brooke
I think it's because they follow her along with no question.
Host Jeff
Yeah, you're all sacrifice themselves.
Jose
All right, this brings us to a tiebreaker between Alexis and Jose.
Host Jeff
Alexis, thank you. Dramatic.
Jose
Thank you. That's perfect. Alexis, we're gonna go to you. If you get this right, you'll win. If you get it wrong, Jose's taking home the crown. Now, Mariah Carey had a hit song called Obsessed, widely believed to be about which rapper she had a public feud with. Was it Eminem, Jay Z, or both of the Island Boys?
Host Jeff
Do you know this song, Alexis?
Brooke
Yes.
Host Jeff
How does it go?
Jeffrey
I thought it was about Nikki.
Brooke
I do know it's the. Why are you so obsessed? Jeff Whitewater.
Alexis
Yeah, that one.
Host Jeff
That was a treat for everybody.
Brooke
Hey, that was one octave.
Host Jeff
That was good.
Brooke
I think I hit more than one.
Alexis
Let's go, Eminem.
Brooke
All right, Lance.
Jose
It was Eminem.
Host Jeff
Alexis.
Jose
And that means you've won today's edition of plenty. Up 20.
Brooke
Are you a lamb?
Host Jeff
So Alexis gets to choose who gets shocked. Today, they're gonna be singing a Mariah Carey song, We Belong Together. Who's it gonna be?
Alexis
Brooke, I wanna hear you hit all 12 octaves.
Host Jeff
Oh, gosh.
Brooke
When you left I lost a part of me it's just so hard to believe Come back, baby, please Baby we belong together really reached that second octave there.
Host Jeff
That was your shock collar. Question of the day.
Show Announcer
Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Host Jeff
It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. And it's the opening weekend of baseball season.
Brooke
So awesome.
Host Jeff
For all the fans out there, this is awesome news. You made it through the winter, you got to spring. Enjoy it. It's still America's pastime, right?
Jeffrey
Of course it is.
Host Jeff
Sort of, yeah. For all you tiktokers out there who are just going to the games because of the new 999 Baseball Challenge, you're gonna need more than luck to pull it off.
Brooke
Okay, remind me what that is. That's hot dogs, beers.
Jeffrey
It's hot dogs and beers each inning. I think, Jeff, because if you haven't heard.
Host Jeff
It's a real thing. People on TikTok are challenging each other to consume nine beers and nine hot dogs over a nine inning baseball game,
Brooke
which you have to plan ahead because they're not serving in the last innings.
Jeffrey
Oh, yeah, very true. Actually, that's a good point.
Host Jeff
They are thinking ahead because instead of running away from this, the stadiums themselves are actually collabing. And I'm gonna show you a picture. It'll be up on the Brooke and Jeffrey Insta stories. If you're a true fan, you'll follow us there at Brooke and Jeffrey.
Brooke
But what, are they just giving away themed puke buckets? Is that the point?
Host Jeff
That's probably what they should do. But no, what they're doing is this 999 challenge carrying boxes that comes with nine mini hot dogs and nine flights of beers. And they did partner with Joey Chestnut, the competitive eater, to do this promotion.
Brooke
Okay, these are tiny. This makes it more doable. Like, there's probably four sips in each beer.
Host Jeff
It's still overwhelming. Just the size of that box is huge.
Brooke
It's cool.
Jeffrey
It's cool to carry around. Like, you want people to see you holding the box and they're like, oh, you're doing the challenge.
Brooke
I would do this challenge if this is what we're talking about, the box with your kids.
Host Jeff
It costs anywhere between 55 and $60. But that's the cost of a normal hot dog in a beer at a stadium anyway, so bargain.
Brooke
Some people thought 999 was the price of the.
Host Jeff
But six different major league baseball parks are doing this. Of course, one of them is Philadelphia because the fans there aren't rowdy enough. So for the people who are just kind of me on the sport of baseball, this is something fun for you to do at the games.
Jeffrey
Now, who's gonna be the first stadium to do vodka shots?
Brooke
Oh, Geez, Jose.
Host Jeff
The 999 challenge was too easy.
Brooke
This isn't football.
Host Jeff
All right, Laser Stories coming up next.
Jeffrey
Hello, it's Laser Stories.
Host Jeff
It's the radio segment that came out with a new sound effect machine for bed. But instead of whale noises or waves crashing, it plays famous celebrity swearing at you while you're still awake.
Brooke
I love it.
Host Jeff
Set it to Gordon Ramsay, Kitchen Nightmares edition, and let him shame you to sleep, you pathetic, driveling insomniac. I've seen crackheads doze off faster. It's Laser Stories, the segment where we read weird news stories around the globe just like everyone else does. Except we've got A laser. Those other snooze losers just don't. This first laser story is out of Washington state. There's a man named Donald Parks who's just been arrested for the 98th time.
Jeffrey
Jeez, why do they let him out?
Brooke
Is that a world record? It is.
Host Jeff
You know, do you get some sort of plaque when you reach your 100th arrest?
Jeffrey
Oh, it's like YouTube. They give you some kind of like, logo.
Host Jeff
Yeah, something like that.
Brooke
If he's like under 98, it's more than once a year.
Jeffrey
He gets arrested constantly there.
Host Jeff
It's his own tradition. Regardless, this time he led officers on a high speed chase after stealing thousands of dollars worth of merchandise from several stores.
Jeffrey
Ain't nobody got time for that.
Brooke
This has never worked out for you before.
Jeffrey
Yeah, he gets out and does it again.
Vanessa
Like, come on.
Host Jeff
You gotta love a guy that doesn't give up, though. The cops had to call off the chase due to the extremely reckless behavior he was exhibiting on the roads, but tracked Donald down a little while later and apprehended him.
Brooke
Just have his own, like, yeah, like the. All the other 97 times.
Host Jeff
The police found a bunch of stolen merchandise and drugs while searching his truck. And get this, they also found a custom bong device actually built into the dash so he could comfortably smoke drugs while driving. I am on a drug.
Jeffrey
It's called.
Host Jeff
Charlie sheen is a four time convicted felon. He has 27 misdemeanor convictions across those 97 prior arrests.
Brooke
You're right, Jose. They should have like some sort of Marriott rewards type of thing for the jail system. Like he'd be a platinum member.
Jeffrey
He's a platinum member for sure.
Host Jeff
He's now facing charges of dui, eluding police, and possession of narcotics. He just walks in.
Jeffrey
Hey, Sarah. Good to see you guys. How you doing?
Brooke
Oh, man, this cell again.
Host Jeff
This next laser story is out of the friendly skies. If you've ever been lucky enough to score an entire row to yourself on a flight. Yes, Then you'll definitely appreciate this. United just announced an upcoming new perk called United Relax Row, where you can book an entire row of three seats to turn into a couch.
Jeffrey
I see this in other airlines before
Brooke
I saw this pictures of this. It's like the footrest comes up and makes the whole thing like a flat bed. It's so amazing.
Host Jeff
Yeah, you can raise up those adjustable leg rests so that you could convert the row into a bed or some sort of couch, like surface for a couch. Cozy, stretching out.
Alexis
I remember the first time I saw someone laying across all three rows. I was like, we can do that.
Jeffrey
They don't kick you out.
Host Jeff
And it's not just that. They'll even give you a mattress pad, a blanket and two pillows. Plus, if you're traveling with kids, they'll toss in a plushie as well.
Jeffrey
I can see Brooke doing this with her whole family in one row. Michael and the kids all piled on.
Brooke
We always try to get the bulkhead in economy whenever we fly just because then you can and have a little more space. Kids can lay on the floor, which is not safe. But it's kind of like the seat belt rules my mom had when in the 80s. So kids are laying in the aisle.
Host Jeff
Yeah, but the thing is, you can't get it yet. United Relax row will be available starting next year on select flights. Each plane will have up to 12 of these brand new rows available.
Brooke
How much more are they going to charge us per se?
Jeffrey
Yeah, it's going to be like first class.
Host Jeff
No word on how much it's going to cost. Although, let's be honest, you know, it's not going to be cheap. And they also haven't said how the booking will work, if they'll make seats in these rows available individually or if they're going to sell them as a unit.
Brooke
That'd be so wild. You have a partner, you and your husband, and then somebody's in the middle row.
Jeffrey
Yeah, you guys put your legs over my lap.
Brooke
I guess we're all snuggling.
Host Jeff
Well, we will keep you updated on more details as they come. This next laser story is out of movie mayhem. Oh, it's a funny gimmick to watch the movie Jaws while floating in a pool or at a water park.
Brooke
Yeah, I've seen that.
Host Jeff
But Volente Beach Resort in Lake Travis, Texas, has taken that experience to an entirely new level because people can buy tickets to the event called Jaws. On the water, you're given an inner tube to float in the middle of a dark lake water while watching on a massive screen. All right, but the catch, at any point you could be dragged under the surface.
Brooke
No way. How the company get real sharks.
Jeffrey
Did they come on?
Host Jeff
Not sharks, but they did hire divers to swim around during the film and scare viewers. While at some points you might just feel a fin nick the bottom of your feet. At the most intense part of the movie, the divers will grab your legs and pull you under.
Vanessa
Terrifying.
Jeffrey
They should have sharks fins on the divers.
Brooke
Are you disappointed? If you're the person who doesn't get pulled under like I was waiting for
Jeffrey
that or you're finally about to kiss her and then they pull you.
Host Jeff
The tickets are 35 bucks and sold out in literally seconds. So why such a high demand? Psychologists call this controlled extreme, a way to pretend to experience death in order to reset your accumulated anxiety.
Brooke
Oh, that's where we are with anxiety in society.
Jeffrey
Let's fake die.
Host Jeff
And then after the movie, patrons say they've never felt more alive. Though many on social media argue you couldn't pay them enough to attend. One person said, if I was invited, the water would be a whole lot browner by the end of the show.
Jeffrey
I just be holding on for dear life the whole time.
Brooke
Jose would be crying the whole time. Don't get me.
Jeffrey
Don't get me.
Host Jeff
Let's go to your final laser story out of Trent Town. What do you think of this trend? Some couples are passing on expensive engagement rings and opting to spend the money on a vacation instead. Oh, yeah.
Brooke
Oh, I love it. I think the engagement ring thing is just a big marketing ploy.
Jeffrey
I mean, it was like, yeah, De Beers or somebody.
Brooke
All of it. Yeah.
Host Jeff
It's not even an early honeymoon. It's an engagement moon. According to a new report, 65% of Americans say that engagement rings have evolved from a traditional symbol of love into a financial burden. 26% of Gen Zers would rather pass on a pricey ring and just use the cash to go on a trip together. And 25% of those people say they just get matching tattoos instead. Even tattooed rings.
Brooke
Okay, let's not do that till after you've been married a while.
Host Jeff
How are you supposed to know that you're engaged to someone?
Brooke
Why do you have to broadcast it to everybody? I don't know. You can put. I had an engagement ring. That was a ring my mother in
Host Jeff
law made and you said such kind things about it.
Brooke
I loved it and I still have it. I just don't wear that much because it's long story, but.
Host Jeff
But you love it.
Brooke
Yeah. I can't wear it with my wedding band. Like, it's not like that. Traditional. That goes together.
Host Jeff
Yeah. So there's some new options coming down the pike. About half of younger Americans say they feel more pressure from social media and from society to get an expensive engagement ring rather than from their own family or their partner.
Jeffrey
Celebrities that have houses on their feet.
Brooke
Yeah. And then you see him get robbed.
Host Jeff
As for this guy, he's a traditionalist. Not only did he meet with the father of a pink sketcher to ask permission first, but he also showed him the Tongue ring that he wants to put on her.
Brooke
Oh, the tongue ring.
Host Jeff
Yeah. Very sweet. And that sound means Laser Stories has come to an end for the day. We'll do it again same time on Monday.
Show Announcer
Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Host Jeff
Ah, radio. It's more than just a movie starring Cuba Gooding Jr. That got a 33% on rotten tomatoes.
Brooke
No, that was a great movie. That's a higher percent than the show would get on Rotten Tomatoes.
Host Jeff
I mean, radio's a thriving industry that provides daily entertainment to dozens of listeners over age 60.
Brooke
Literally killing Jake in the background.
Jose
Stop thinking about the movie.
Host Jeff
Look, if you somehow get a job in radio and manage to last more than one year in this industry, then you're gonna see some stuff which says a lot about Brooke, who's been working since she got out of college during the, what, Eisenhower administration, Watergate era, maybe? No, she's seen some things. And today we're asking her to peel back the curtain to share the top things she's learned in her career as a bubbly radio personality.
Brooke
I'm bubbly.
Host Jeff
You were at one point. We're gonna do it. What has Brooke learned about radio?
Jeffrey
Coming up. I think he's referring to the cocktail.
Brooke
That makes sense.
Host Jeff
It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. And on this day, back in 1968, Brooke Fox was hired onto this radio show. She signed her first contract with a quill pen, had the station intern take her black and white monochrome portrait, hung it up in the lobby, and from that point on, her life was never the same. Wow. Not only has she been on the air doing this job for decades, but she's been part of Wacky stunts, remote broadcast gone awry, and even interviewed Apple Dapp from the Black Eyed Peas at Disneyland one time.
Brooke
I forgot about that.
Host Jeff
Which was her biggest claim to fame and what will ultimately be put on her tombstone.
Brooke
He's the only person that would talk to me on the red carpet.
Host Jeff
Brooke Fox is a true legend in her field. That's why today we're gonna focus on her storied past to find out what she's learned in this crazy, ever growing, never slowing industry that we call radio. So, Brooke, let's get to your list. What is the first thing that you've learned?
Brooke
Okay, one of the things I learned is that when you do a stunt for the show, when you think it's done, people can still be watching.
Eric
Okay.
Brooke
Yeah.
Host Jeff
What do you mean?
Brooke
For example, we decided when I bought my very first house, I was 26 years old, paid zero down For a house. We're like, yes. We're gonna set up a Big Brother and we're gonna put webcams all over it.
Eric
Whoa.
Brooke
And the whole morning show is gonna live with me.
Host Jeff
Oh, sounds crazy. Feels invasive.
Brooke
Yeah. Problem was, is I was also secretly hooking up with my producer at the time, and I got caught on camera. Yeah, but just making out I had my clothes on.
Jeffrey
I was gonna say that's like, courage in this industry.
Brooke
Wow.
Alexis
And now you don't even invite us over.
Brooke
Yep.
Jeffrey
See, that's why she's looking up with one of them.
Host Jeff
You did learn something from that. That's cool. What else have you learned about working in radio?
Brooke
I learned that I never want to be in the military. Military?
Host Jeff
What makes you say that?
Brooke
Well, it's not because of, like, anything, but the food. Really? Truly.
Jeffrey
I mean, gone wrong.
Brooke
Yes. My dad was a Marine. Thank you for your service. I get it. But also, the food is terrible. And the very, very first week I was ever part of any radio show, they're like, all right, we're doing a stunt. You're going to eat MREs for a whole month.
Ashton
Oh, my God.
Host Jeff
Military food?
Brooke
Yes.
Jeffrey
Powdered?
Brooke
No. They are wet packed, which makes it even grosser.
Jeffrey
It's like wet food for a cat.
Brooke
Kind of. I mean, the beef stew is not far from fancy cat. You're not lying.
Jeffrey
Come on, man.
Brooke
And the thing is, thinking back on it, it was, like, in March, so I'm not even. There's no Veterans Day. I don't know why we were even doing that.
Jeffrey
Slow day on the radio.
Brooke
I didn't question it, E. Meanwhile, nowadays
Host Jeff
we make Ashton eat Taco Bell for a month.
Brooke
Dude, that is like. I'm sorry, posh.
Host Jeff
You should be grateful, Ashton.
Eric
Yeah.
Brooke
I'm gonna bring you in an MRE and see how you feel.
Host Jeff
If you're just joining us, we are looking back on Brooke's illustrious extensive career in radio to find out what nuggets she's learned from this industry. What else, Brooke?
Brooke
That sometimes what you see in the news about celebrities kind of tracks with who they are.
Jeffrey
Oh, it's not a rumor.
Brooke
Yeah, that it's accurate.
Eric
Right?
Brooke
Like years before the scandal and before the lawsuits and the craziness, we got to interview Diddy at one of the stations.
Host Jeff
Is this another hidden camera inside your house reveal?
Brooke
No, no, no. He comes in with this huge entourage, right? And he is not nice. Just gonna say that.
Jeffrey
Shocking.
Brooke
Only is he a really bad interview, or maybe I'm just a bad interviewer. He kicks Us all out of the studio.
Jeffrey
Diva.
Brooke
And then proceeds, because the microphones are still on, my man proceeds to scream at his stylist at the top of his lungs for 15 minutes about paying his stylist 70 grand a year to only pick out T shirts.
Jose
Oh.
Brooke
I mean, more rage than I've ever heard anyone expel.
Jeffrey
But now you can relate because you're a stylist. You pay 70.
Host Jeff
You know what, that angle at the
Jeffrey
time, okay, that's actually why.
Brooke
Dude, it was wild. We had the audio of it. We recorded it, and our boss was like, you can't hear that.
Jeffrey
I'm like, nowadays we would.
Host Jeff
Because he's so nice on the making the band show. So that totally ruins him.
Jeffrey
How are the parties?
Vanessa
Yeah,
Host Jeff
she signed. She signed the NDA. She's not allowed to talk about it. What else have you learned?
Brooke
You know what? It's funny that you say that, because I've also learned that I am not cool enough to be invited to any drug parties. I am not cool enough. When I first started in the industry, I had a boss who would have these big dinners with record reps. And I would get to go to the dinner, but it was always at a hotel where the reps were staying. And they'd all go up to the hotel room, and then they'd come back down, and then they'd go up to the hotel room, and then they'd come back down. I had no idea.
Ashton
I had no idea.
Brooke
And I would just sit by myself at the table waiting for everyone to come back.
Ashton
She's like, I didn't know guys also
Jeffrey
go to the bathroom together so much.
Brooke
And then they would come back, and my boss would go. Everything on the menu. Literally, Literally. And then passed out in his dinner plate. What a time.
Host Jeff
It's those early mornings in radio.
Jeffrey
You get so tired.
Brooke
Must be it. Yeah.
Host Jeff
So far we learned four things. Do you have one more?
Brooke
Yes. To always be grateful for every listener.
Host Jeff
You guys.
Brooke
My very first fan I met in a little tiny town in Cheney, Washington. And she used to win prizes for us all the time. And she showed up at an event, and her name, her real name was Candy Penix. And she showed up with a shirt that had my head pictured all over it. My face. And it was the strangest and also most nice thing anyone's ever done for me.
Host Jeff
The fans.
Brooke
I remember you, Candy.
Host Jeff
I remember you, Candy. Is she still around?
Brooke
I don't know. I tried to look her up on Facebook, but I couldn't find anything inappropriate.
Jeffrey
Stuff pops up. Wait a Minute.
Host Jeff
Gotta clear your search history after that.
Brooke
So I appreciate every single person that's gotten us here.
Ashton
That was good.
Host Jeff
Wow, look at that. Those are the top things that Brooke has learned in her six decades working in radio.
Brooke
Six and a half.
Host Jeff
Six and a half. You make it look so easy, Brooke. Phone taps coming up right after this. It's almost time for your prank call to Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. And going to work now is a lot different than it was a couple decades ago. At least that's what I hear from Brooke. I wasn't in the workforce. I was just a hopeful, young chiseled preteen at the time. But one of the perks that certain companies like to do now is bring your pet to work day. A lot of places do it. And in today's call, I will take full advantage of that. You're going to see how in your brand new phone tap right now, Brooke
Show Announcer
and Jeffrey's phone taps on the the twenties.
Eric
Hello?
Host Jeff
Hi, I'm calling from insurance. My name is Denny Plopkins. Is this Leslie?
Vanessa
It is. Hi.
Host Jeff
Hi, Leslie. I'm just calling to follow up on an insurance claim that you made with us regarding an incident with your car.
Vanessa
Yes.
Host Jeff
Okay, now before we proceed, just so you know, no official decisions have been made yet on who's at fault. So.
Eric
Okay.
Host Jeff
I'm here to get the full story of what happened from your perspective.
Vanessa
Okay, so I was driving and I
Eric
was going the speed limit. Actually a couple miles under the speed limit.
Host Jeff
Go ahead.
Vanessa
Do you have your dog?
Host Jeff
I do, yeah. It's take your pet to work day here.
Vanessa
That's so nice. Oh my God, I love that.
Host Jeff
Stop it.
Ashton
Let's go, let's go.
Host Jeff
Down, down. No, Daddy's trying.
Vanessa
Oh my goodness.
Host Jeff
Okay. I'm sorry about that, Leslie.
Vanessa
Nope, no problem at all.
Eric
I love dogs.
Host Jeff
So I'm sorry. It totally interrupted your story. You said you were going 20 over the speed limit and.
Vanessa
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Eric
I said.
Vanessa
I said I was going under the speed limit.
Host Jeff
Oh my goodness.
Ashton
Cheryl.
Vanessa
Ah.
Ashton
Cheryl,
Brooke
no.
Jeffrey
Down, birdie.
Vanessa
What on earth?
Host Jeff
Down, birdie.
Eric
Oh my God. Are you okay?
Jeffrey
Get over here.
Host Jeff
I'm so sorry about that.
Vanessa
Those things can really hurt you. What kind of bird was that? It just. It just loose in your office.
Host Jeff
Oh, no, no, no. That's my bird. It's an African gray parrot.
Eric
Oh my goodness.
Host Jeff
Remember, it's take your pet to work day. Okay, Yeah, I was trying to get my assistant Cheryl to come over and take care of him.
Vanessa
So how many pets did you today?
Host Jeff
Just a couple.
Vanessa
Just a couple.
Host Jeff
There's no rules limiting the number of pets you can bring in on take your pet to work day, so I just thought I'd bring the whole family. Oh, Whiskers.
Vanessa
Hey, maybe you should just call me
Eric
back when it's not so chaotic over there.
Host Jeff
No, I. I think I'm staying on track. You had some incident driving your car. I think we covered that, so just keep going.
Eric
I mean, I.
Vanessa
It wasn't really my incident. I was doing everything right. I was driving the speed limit. I was actually a couple of miles under, as I mentioned earlier.
Host Jeff
Oh, Jerry. Jerry, stay over in your court.
Vanessa
Jerry.
Jose
Jerry.
Host Jeff
Yeah, sorry. Jerry's my goat.
Vanessa
What kind of car do you drive, Just out of curiosity? I want a visual for myself.
Host Jeff
Leslie, you're trying to get me off my game, remember? We're not talking about my car. We're talking about your car, the one you crashed.
Vanessa
Excuse you?
Eric
No.
Host Jeff
Well, you haven't really told me much about your incident. You just said that.
Vanessa
Why don't we finish the list of pets, and then maybe I can tell you what happened.
Host Jeff
Oh, I forgot that I brought you today. No, no, no.
Ashton
Guys, be nice.
Host Jeff
Remember what we talked about before we came to work Inside.
Ashton
No inside voices.
Host Jeff
Roscoe. Roscoe. Okay, get away from Jerry. No, you. Cheryl, I'm gonna need some help over here.
Vanessa
This is out of control. No way you're at a national insurance company. Like a proper office job? You have an assistant?
Host Jeff
Yes, her name's Cheryl, and she's doing a mediocre job at best, but yes.
Jeffrey
Wow.
Host Jeff
Would you like to speak with her?
Vanessa
I think I would. I'm concerned for her safety.
Host Jeff
One of the clients wants to talk to you. Cheryl.
Eric
Oh, my God.
Host Jeff
Okay, come on.
Vanessa
No way.
Host Jeff
That is her.
Eric
The cow?
Jeffrey
Yep.
Eric
Oh, my God.
Host Jeff
She doesn't believe that you're really my assistant.
Eric
Cheryl.
Ashton
No.
Host Jeff
Oh, well, now she's really not gonna believe that. I don't want to come down there
Vanessa
and meet the elephant.
Host Jeff
I feel like you're figuring out this is a prank call.
Vanessa
There's no way.
Host Jeff
Yeah, because my real name is Jeff. From the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning.
Vanessa
What? On Twitter, this is the most bizarre.
Host Jeff
Your best friend Jules wanted to set you up for this.
Vanessa
What? Why?
Host Jeff
She said that the two of you mess with each other all the time, and she thought your recent car incident would be a perfect chance to get back at you.
Vanessa
I was like, what is happening right now?
Host Jeff
Was it my African Grey Parrot that put it over the top, or was it the elephant, honestly.
Ashton
Down, girl.
Jeffrey
Down.
Host Jeff
We'll get a peanut later.
Vanessa
It was the cow, right? Now, there's no way. I've seen what cows do. There's no way.
Host Jeff
Most cows may be, but Cheryl is my assistant. She's well trained. Yes, you are a good girl, aren't you? I'm gonna milk you later.
Jeffrey
Brook and Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s.
Show Announcer
Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Host Jeff
They used to have a game show called Name that Tune.
Brooke
Oh, yeah.
Host Jeff
I think they even brought it back recently where they play a snippet of a song, and the two contestants would wager basically, like, oh, I could guess that song in five seconds. And the other would go, oh, yeah. Well, I. I could guess it in four.
Brooke
Dude, my mom loved that game. She's like, two notes. I got it in two notes.
Host Jeff
Well, if we were playing that game on our show, it would be. I could ruin my own date in three seconds.
Ashton
Oh, yeah?
Host Jeff
Well, I bet I could blow it in under two.
Jeffrey
Oh, yeah?
Ashton
Well, look at this.
Host Jeff
Well, you're gonna be shocked when you hear the briefest conversation our listener had to end the evening that instantly brought it to a screeching halt. Even you're gonna be impressed when you hear your brand new second date update. Date next.
Show Announcer
Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Brooke
Second date update.
Host Jeff
If you're a guy and you're out on a first date having dinner, what are some possible distractions that could derail you that you got to stay away from?
Jeffrey
Oh, that's a good question.
Host Jeff
Like one, A rat runs across the floor in front of you.
Brooke
I think. Alert everyone.
Host Jeff
Pretend you never saw it. No, it's probably the owner. Owner's pet. It helps him cook the food. Like in ratatouille. All is good.
Brooke
Okay, let's go somewhere else.
Host Jeff
Or distraction two. Let's say the waitress is a little b L, busty and lonely. Look at her.
Jeffrey
But she's a B.
Alexis
Don't call her that.
Brooke
To her, you don't.
Host Jeff
Exactly.
Brooke
How do you know she's lonely? By looking at you.
Host Jeff
Oh, you can tell Brooke. Yeah, they have that lonely look in their eye. You just keep your eyes on the ground when you put in your order. And our listener Eric had a different type of distraction that he had to deal with.
Brooke
Let me guess. A busty rat.
Host Jeff
Is it maybe that? Or could it even be worse than the ones I mentioned? Possibly. Eric, welcome to the show, man.
Eric
Hey, thanks for taking my call.
Host Jeff
Absolutely. We'll get to the distraction on your date in a second. First, tell us about the girl. That you met.
Eric
Her name's Vanessa. She. She works in the beauty industry and,
Brooke
like, she's a esthetician. You mean like that?
Eric
Yeah, and she is gorgeous. In fact, like, I was kind of surprised that she said yes to the date.
Brooke
Oh, that's cute.
Eric
And so I thought, you know, I gotta turn on the charm. So I took her out.
Jose
Okay.
Eric
And I wanted to take her to this bar and grill.
Brooke
Applebee's. I love that place.
Eric
It's not Applebee's. It's not Applebee's. It's got really good vibes.
Vanessa
All right.
Host Jeff
All right. And how was Vanessa when she showed up?
Eric
She looked really cute and really friendly and approachable. And this thing happened.
Host Jeff
Okay. The distraction.
Eric
It wasn't a rat or any of that. Like, 20 minutes after we sat down, someone walks in to the restaurant.
Host Jeff
Who is it?
Eric
It's my ex girlfriend.
Jeffrey
Oh, my God.
Host Jeff
I thought you said there wasn't a rat.
Jeffrey
What are the odds?
Brooke
So do you just. I mean, dang, is it a big restaurant? Can you ignore her?
Eric
It's not a big place. And she was with her guy. She was with her new guy. It was pretty obvious.
Alexis
When's the last time you saw her? Like, has it been years or. It's, like, recent?
Eric
It was about six months.
Brooke
Okay.
Host Jeff
Okay.
Jeffrey
Enough to be awkward.
Eric
And then I look over like. Like a few minutes later. And, you know, I'm trying not to look over, but I see that she's, like, sucking down margaritas and, like, she's laughing and she's having a great time. I know.
Jeffrey
Brooke is a great, great. She's having fun.
Brooke
Well, you know how it is. Like, when they come in and they're doing the extra loud laugh just to, like, get your attention. And I mean, it sucks for you because it ruins your whole date. Even if you don't say anything, you're distracted, you're no longer fully present for.
Alexis
And then if you mention your ex, then it sounds like you have a
Host Jeff
lot of drama, but did that come up? Did your date, Vanessa know that your ex was in the restaurant too?
Eric
I told her. I said, look. Yeah, my ex girlfriend just came in.
Host Jeff
What was her reaction?
Eric
She was, I don't know, intrigued.
Vanessa
And I was like, don't look, don't look.
Eric
But she looked anyway.
Jeffrey
Of course I want to see.
Eric
And she's like, oh, wow, she's really pretty. Like, okay. Anyway, let's talk about you.
Brooke
Why didn't you say, let's go find another spot?
Eric
Oh, I offered that. But Vanessa, she was like, no, no, it's all right. It's all right. Like, we were here first, and she had a point.
Vanessa
Yeah.
Host Jeff
If your date wanted to stay through it, then that's on her. Were you to get things back on track?
Eric
Well, that's the thing. I felt like the vibe of the day kind of changed from there, and, like, it didn't. Didn't ever go back.
Brooke
Okay. Are you over your ex?
Eric
Well, yeah. I mean, we're not together question.
Brooke
I mean, it just. I mean, I think that makes it even trickier, right? Because, like, maybe Vanessa picked up on that.
Eric
Well, that's the thing at the end. I mean, there was this thing that happened that. Another thing at the end of the day, it's like we're walking out. And I guess I just wanted to show Vanessa that I was sort of like, above it all. And so I approached my ex girlfriend's table and I said, hey, hope you have a great night. It was good to see you. And I said, your hair looks great. And then I was like, I know. I was like, why would I say that?
Vanessa
But she changed her hair.
Eric
She changed her hair and I thought it looked good and it just came out.
Host Jeff
Okay, well, that's the part you probably should omit from there. Did Vanessa hear you compliment your ex girlfriend's hair?
Brooke
Yeah. Where was she standing even?
Eric
I don't know. She might have. Like, she was really close to me.
Jeffrey
She definitely heard it.
Brooke
See? And you didn't introduce Vanessa. I mean, that's the baller move, right? Hey, Vanessa.
Host Jeff
This is my upgrade.
Eric
I should have done that. Yeah, I just panicked and I was like. I just conversated with like, three or four seconds, and then I left. I was out.
Brooke
And I'm sure you're all flustered now, walking Vanessa to her car.
Jeffrey
Your hair also looks nice, by the way.
Host Jeff
What happened when you leave?
Eric
We hugged in the parking lot and. And that was it.
Jose
Yeah.
Host Jeff
Just. But from the way that he's talking about it, you can tell that he regrets how he handled the situation.
Jeffrey
Yeah, totally.
Brooke
Sure. I mean, it's totally unfortunate. Do you think the date would have gone flawlessly if your ex hadn't walked into that restaurant?
Eric
Yeah, it just. It sucks that that happened, but it feels like it's out of my. Like, it's out of my control right now.
Host Jeff
Yeah. That wasn't your fault. And as long as you didn't, like, go home and post a long tick tock or Instagram post about seeing your ex and how great she looked, but
Brooke
you're past it now, so then you look Pathetic. To two women, not just one.
Host Jeff
Exactly. As long as you didn't do that, then we might have a chance to save this for you.
Jeffrey
Please tell us you didn't do that.
Eric
That I didn't do that. Exactly.
Brooke
Exactly.
Host Jeff
Okay.
Jeffrey
Post it on MySpace.
Host Jeff
Well, whatever.
Brooke
One of those where we find out something.
Host Jeff
Whatever damage you did to yourself, we're gonna have to undo it when we come back. Get you your second date update right after this. Hold on.
Show Announcer
Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Brooke
Second date update.
Host Jeff
Let's recap. Eric's first date, for those of you just joining. Eric met a woman named Vanessa for dinner recently. She's in the beauty industry, and for the first 20 minutes, everything was great.
Brooke
It was perfect.
Host Jeff
Even conversation was flowing. The connection was easy. It was all gravy until Eric's ex girlfriend walked in and sat down within eyeshot.
Jeffrey
Womp, womp. What are the odds, man?
Vanessa
Yes.
Host Jeff
So vibes changed after that, and he
Brooke
had to admit that his ex was there.
Host Jeff
He did.
Brooke
He was so weird.
Host Jeff
He told Vanessa. Not sure if that was a bad idea or a horrible idea, but he did it.
Brooke
I mean, he had no other choice.
Alexis
The worst idea is what happened after.
Host Jeff
Yeah, it was on his mind. And that's why right before he left, he stopped by his ex's table and told her she has nice hair.
Jeffrey
And that's the bad part.
Host Jeff
So great date if it was just Eric and his ex. But Vanessa was present too and isn't calling him back. I wonder why that could be.
Brooke
Yeah.
Host Jeff
And as a joke earlier, I said, eric, you didn't post a tick tock about how good your ex looked that night, and your answer was not exactly.
Brooke
Yeah, what did you post?
Host Jeff
What does that mean?
Eric
Well, I didn't. I didn't post anything. I just. I. I did text my ex one time.
Brooke
What did you text her?
Eric
I'm so sorry for the awkward encounter, and I didn't know what to say.
Brooke
Okay.
Jeffrey
Okay. That's actually not bad. It could have gone way worse.
Brooke
Did your ex respond?
Eric
She gave me a thumbs up. Oh.
Host Jeff
Yeah.
Jeffrey
Okay.
Host Jeff
Well, she's the sexiest of all the things you could write back.
Brooke
She's over it. Yeah.
Jeffrey
Yeah, she doesn't like you.
Host Jeff
Unless they were both into thumb play. You don't know Brooke.
Jeffrey
Ooh, it's their thing.
Brooke
What is? I don't. I'm not even going down that.
Host Jeff
You're not advanced enough to get to that stage of romance.
Jeffrey
Nobody play thumb wars with Jeff.
Host Jeff
Yeah, definitely don't like any of my posts that I sent to you. Because I'll read it in a different way. But let's find out what Vanessa thinks. I'm going to dial her number and we'll see what she has to say. You ready, Eric?
Eric
I'm ready.
Host Jeff
All right, thumbs up to that. Here we go.
Eric
Hello?
Host Jeff
Hey, is this Vanessa?
Vanessa
Yes.
Host Jeff
Hey, Vanessa. Thank you for answering.
Jeffrey
Yes.
Brooke
You sound busy. Sorry.
Vanessa
Yeah, but who's this?
Host Jeff
We don't want to take up a lot of your time. We're a radio show. We're called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning.
Vanessa
Okay.
Jeffrey
Good morning.
Host Jeff
Just to cut right to it, we're doing a segment called the Second Date Update. Trying to help out one of our listeners that you went out with recently.
Vanessa
Yeah. Who?
Host Jeff
It's a guy named Eric. Very sweet sounding guy.
Vanessa
Oh, so you like, talk to him or whatever. So you know what happened?
Brooke
Oh, you're right to the point. And I like that about Vanessa. There's no sugar coating anything here.
Host Jeff
All that we know that happened is Eric's ex showed up in the middle of the date.
Vanessa
Oh. Yeah, I actually honestly think he handled that really well. Oh, really?
Brooke
Oh, that's good. He was worried that he was like, awkward about it and.
Vanessa
Yeah, no, he was a hundred percent honest and upfront with me about it.
Eric
Like.
Vanessa
Oh, he was really classy. He even said goodbye to her to prove that he's above all the drama.
Brooke
So you were. You like.
Host Jeff
Yeah.
Brooke
You liked that?
Vanessa
I thought it was really mature.
Eric
Absolutely.
Host Jeff
I was not expecting that.
Brooke
We thought for sure you were gonna say that. He didn't seem like he was over his ex or something like that.
Vanessa
Oh, no. He told me some stories and. Oh my God, that woman is a piece of work.
Brooke
Whoa. Oh, oh, so he even shared some crazy ex stories, huh? So is that what upset you?
Vanessa
I'm not upset. Why do you keep asking that?
Brooke
I meant, like, why you're not calling him back.
Host Jeff
Yeah, we're trying to figure out what's happen happened with you since the date with Eric.
Vanessa
Yeah, I mean, so we said goodbye in the parking lot, but I stayed because I wanted to follow his ex home
Eric
way.
Alexis
You mentioned that.
Brooke
What do you mean?
Host Jeff
Just to make sure she got home safe.
Vanessa
Well, no, I. I wanted to make sure that what happened to Eric didn't happen to the guy that she was on a date with.
Brooke
Wait, what happened to Eric? What was his story?
Vanessa
Well, it's his story, so I don't really want to share it, but like, it sounds like she traumatized him.
Host Jeff
So what happened when you got back to where she was going?
Vanessa
Well, he Dropped her off and she kissed him. But he did not go inside. And so I went up to talk to the guy.
Brooke
What?
Vanessa
When he went back to his car.
Brooke
Wait, wait, wait.
Ashton
Whoa.
Brooke
Okay. You parked, got out of your car, approached his car in the dark?
Vanessa
Yeah, because I had to warn him. And I was like, what are you doing right now? Do you want to grab a drink with me?
Host Jeff
Wait, what?
Ashton
What's the goal by asking this guy out?
Vanessa
Because I wanted to warn him. Because, like, Eric told me all these stories and I needed time. If they weren't stories, I could just tell him on the street.
Brooke
You just met Eric. You don't know what's true, what's not true? It's a one sided story. Like, totally. Eric still alive. It's not like you're saving someone's life.
Host Jeff
So what happened when you went out and talked to the other guy?
Vanessa
I told him all the things about why they broke up and how she's a big time manipulator. And he was kind of like, maybe I can kind of see those signs or whatever. This was like, I think their second date. And I was like, okay.
Jeffrey
I mean, she's a bad person, I guess, but you don't know that.
Vanessa
I mean, I've been talking to Eric for like a week or so before our date, and he seemed like a trustworthy guy and I absolutely believe him. And so you've got to trust some people out there.
Host Jeff
For some reason, Brooke doesn't trust our own listener who just happens to be on the line right now quietly listening in on this phone call.
Brooke
I bet he is speechless right now
Host Jeff
because, yeah, he is there, actually. Vanessa on the phone right now.
Vanessa
Who is?
Host Jeff
Eric is.
Eric
Yeah, I'm sorry I didn't like sneak up on you, Vanessa, but, like, what? What? Why? Why did you. Why would you follow what?
Vanessa
I mean? You know the stories you told me. I had to save this guy from going through what you went through.
Eric
Wow. I didn't ask you to do that.
Vanessa
No, you didn't. But I feel like I needed to give him the heads up.
Eric
Well, I was trying to be honest with you, and now I feel like this could blow back on me.
Jeffrey
How?
Host Jeff
How, Eric?
Brooke
We mean, how Jeff? Of course the ex girlfriend's gonna find out about this.
Vanessa
No, he will not hear from her. I made him promise not to tell her anything. He stopped going on dates with her.
Jeffrey
We tricked everyone but the woman we've never spoken to.
Brooke
What did your ex do that was so awful?
Eric
We're on the radio. I'm not gonna say that.
Vanessa
But like, you telling me this stuff on our date is pretty much giving me permission to go and tell this.
Eric
No, it would be permission if you
Vanessa
told me you were gonna do that
Eric
and then I said yes.
Vanessa
That would be permission.
Eric
That's what permission is.
Jeffrey
Yeah.
Vanessa
You had already left though.
Ashton
Yeah.
Host Jeff
Superman doesn't ask for permission to save somebody's life when they're in danger.
Jeffrey
He just swoops in and saves them.
Brooke
Okay, Eric, honestly, was this guy in any danger because of your ex?
Eric
I don't think he was in danger.
Host Jeff
That's exactly what you said when you started to date her, bro. Wouldn't it have been nice if at the start of your last bad relationship, Vanessa had come up to you on date number two and been like, look, this girl is bad news for you. She is going to hurt you. And she would have been right?
Eric
I mean, maybe. Yeah, it was a pretty bad ending. And I guess that could have been good.
Host Jeff
See, clearly she has a heart of gold and wants to save men from terrible women. But I think we're missing the point.
Brooke
Is that what she's doing?
Host Jeff
If I'm just summarizing what I think
Brooke
I'm hearing, it's not like a glaring red flag that she's following strangers over the night with her car and interfering in relationship she knows nothing about.
Host Jeff
Okay, tomato, tomato. Brooke, I pretty much said the exact same thing. We're avoiding the main question here, and that's Vanessa. Why aren't you talking to Eric since that night?
Vanessa
Well, I was focusing on making sure that this guy was. Was okay.
Host Jeff
The other guy.
Brooke
Have you gone on more than one hangout with this guy?
Vanessa
Yeah, of course, he didn't believe me at the start, so like, I went to go talk to him again during the day.
Eric
Wait a second. So you are seeing my ex girlfriend's new boyfriend, Eric?
Vanessa
They went on two dates. That's not a boyfriend.
Brooke
Yeah, don't be crazy.
Alexis
She ended it for him, remember?
Host Jeff
Right. She's not seeing him. She's warning him.
Vanessa
In fact, I'm seeing him again tonight and I'm gonna warn him for a third time.
Brooke
Wow.
Jeffrey
Wait a minute.
Brooke
Sounds like he's enjoying the warning.
Eric
This doesn't sound right. There's something off here.
Brooke
You know what? Go with your gut, Eric.
Jeffrey
You're right.
Host Jeff
The thing that's off is that I haven't offered to send you two out on another date. Thank you for reminding me, Eric, because we would love to put up however much money it takes to get you two back together for one more meetup. I guess I should ask Vanessa. What do you think?
Vanessa
Listen, Eric, my focus right now is in this other guy, and once he 100% believes me not to go out with your ex, then I will focus on you.
Host Jeff
I don't know.
Eric
I don't know, Vanessa.
Host Jeff
Well, we're out of time, and it's sounding like it's a no for Eric. So instead, the gift cards are going to Vanessa and the dude that she followed home to save from dating your ex girlfriend. I don't think I've ever said those words in my life. Entire life. But I'm glad that I get to today, because at least it gives Jose hope that someday a woman might follow him home without asking.
Jeffrey
Oh, yeah, that's. That has to be how it goes down.
Host Jeff
Oh, so romantic.
Show Announcer
Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Host Jeff
I would not be surprised if Vanessa hangs around that woman's apartment all next week. She might even move into the building with her just to warn any future. Future dudes that she stops by with. Don't date her. She's crazy. Trust me, I would know.
Brooke
We never asked. She did sound busy when we first called her. Like, she could have just actually been in her car outside of her apartment.
Host Jeff
Yeah, scoping out the place, ready to save any dudes from their own demise.
Jeffrey
It could get worse. Like, if the other girl sees her, then she's gonna start following her. Eventually, they're gonna stalk each other.
Host Jeff
Yeah.
Brooke
You know, I feel like he needs to call his ex and warn her.
Host Jeff
Yeah, it's always good when a crazy girl says, you know, that other girl girl is crazier than me. Look out. But there's a whole podcast full of crazy people going on even crazier dates. It's ours.
Brooke
Yeah, so go find the ones hosting that.
Host Jeff
You'll feel a little bit less crazy when you find us on Spotify, Apple, wherever you get yours. Brooke and Jeffrey's second date Update. Like, and subscribe. We got a text into 78592 that says, I don't think Jeff realizes how many of his parents parody songs my family listens to during our long road trips.
Brooke
Oh, that's awesome.
Jeffrey
Oh, wait a minute.
Host Jeff
We play them back to back to back.
Brooke
Oh, wow.
Host Jeff
Not because they're necessarily that funny. Oh, they're all right. But at least I don't have to play I Spy with my kids or listen to my wife complain about her sister for hours on end. So thank you, Jeff, and keep up the mid work.
Brooke
Mid, mid, mid, mid.
Host Jeff
Good to know that my music is keeping families together by preventing them from talking directly to each other.
Jeffrey
You're like a buffer.
Host Jeff
Maybe I can save you from having to suffer through more conversation with your immediate family members during my brand new song of the week. It's coming up right after this. It is time for my song of the Week. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Vanessa
Yeah.
Host Jeff
And if you're like me, you recently turned the page on your Marie Curie centerfold calendar. Cause not only is it National Hot Female Scientist Month, it's also the start of spring.
Brooke
Yay.
Host Jeff
That's right. Spring has arrived. That magical time of year when you realize, oh, yeah, I'm allergic to everything. But spring is the season of regeneration, the season of. Of renewal. In the season for finally throwing out all the old crap that you don't need anymore that's just lying around your house.
Jeffrey
Sprinkling.
Host Jeff
You're digging through your cupboards. You're like, why did I even buy this mini donut maker? What was I thinking? Your closets are stuffed with empty Amazon boxes, and you've got a drawer full of Taco Bell hot sauce packets from three years ago.
Jeffrey
Everybody has that drawer, though.
Brooke
You're giving me anxiety thinking about all the cleaning I need to do.
Host Jeff
Oh, yeah, don't even get me started on cleaning with kids in the house.
Jeffrey
It's like a reverse statement.
Host Jeff
That's like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos.
Brooke
That is exactly what it is.
Host Jeff
What's the point? But I do think it's important and actually really healthy for everybody to take a day or a weekend to go through your house or your apartment or even brook one of your offshore factories to declutter, decontaminate, and just hit the reset on your living space. Give yourself a fresh new start with spring. Yeah.
Brooke
Yeah. Will someone do it for me?
Alexis
I love cleaning.
Brooke
I'll do it. Okay, sure.
Host Jeff
Bring someone in to do it. As long as it gets done. So I wanted to give everybody a fun little song that might inspire you to keep on scrubbing, keep on cleaning. And that's why instead of singing the classic smash mouth hit, I'm a Believer, it's Young Jeffries. I'm a spring cleaner.
Brooke
Okay? I mean, this sounds like motivation, and I'm here for it.
Jeffrey
Here we go.
Host Jeff
I'm a point when I'm ready points.
Ashton
My whole house been looking like a garbage pail.
Host Jeff
Still haven't taken down my Christmas tree,
Ashton
but the lights on it are so shiny, the stuff is getting smelly.
Host Jeff
Oh, no, wait, that's me. I gave Marie condo ptsd.
Ashton
But then the seasons changed Now I'm a spring cleaner Throwing away gift cards that expired I checked the road Ooh, right underneath I found an old wiener
Host Jeff
from last July My place looks like
Ashton
hoarders on amphetamines I haven't seen my cat in bout a month. Where are you, Luke? Skywhiskers? What's this old remote to?
Host Jeff
And why do I have three tossing out ziplocs full of batteries?
Ashton
Cause when the flowers came I bought a degreaser My old duvet I burned to save time rubber gloves Ooh, life is much sweeter While huffing cleaner like 409 spray bottle solo. I called up Cinderella cuz I've been wondering How'd she get forest creatures to help her clean? I sweep the floors all day My swiffer machine done more broom play than the cast of StopLife My vacuum sucks, my roomba's a quitter Ate so much litter it broke down and cried
Jeffrey
and
Ashton
so I called a ma and ordered a pizza she saw my place and flatly declined Most boys in my freezer yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah
Eric
and
Ashton
now I'm a freezer
Host Jeff
no, that pile's my dirty clothes this pile's only semi
Ashton
dirty A laundry room crime damned up like a a beaver so much when
Host Jeff
the garbage guy comes to my house he's gonna be like, holy.
Ashton
Sorry, trash guys more free than rum Screen up. Now I'm a spring cleaner.
Host Jeff
Yeah,
Brooke
I'd applaud but you'd spray me again.
Ashton
It's a spray bottle solo, dude, just
Jeffrey
do whatever he wants.
Host Jeff
Sorry, did I not mention there's a splash zone during this song that we. I'm sorry. It does smell a whole lot better in here.
Jeffrey
It does. That's true.
Host Jeff
So yeah, we kind of needed that. That was a new coffee.
Ashton
Song of the week.
Brooke
Oh, my God.
Host Jeff
You could text in 7592 and tell us what you thought about it.
Jeffrey
Watch it on YouTube.
Brooke
Everyone's gonna want to know where you got that spray bottle from because it literally shot. Yeah, that was fully a crush.
Host Jeff
Industrial strength. Yeah, you're not even gonna need to shower for like a month after this, so.
Brooke
Planning to anyway.
Host Jeff
Perfect. That's your song of the week.
Show Announcer
Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Host Jeff
Just like the pimple on my forehead, Today's player is brand new.
Brooke
Is that why you're wearing a hat today?
Host Jeff
That's right. I had to pull it down a little lower. Her name is Amy. She's a first timer, but she's been listening to our show for over a decade now. She says she's not. Not good at trivia. But she wanted to play Brooke cuz quote, why not?
Jeffrey
Hey, good reason.
Host Jeff
Love that. Amy, welcome to the show.
Vanessa
Thank you, Amy.
Brooke
I'm distracted staring at Jeffrey trying to see where his pimple is, and I can actually kind of see a red area coming out from the bottom trying
Vanessa
to show itself to distract you.
Brooke
Pimple patches are cool now. Oh, yeah.
Jose
Two schools of thought.
Vanessa
Yeah.
Host Jeff
Okay, enough pimple talk. I think we need to get to trivia talk.
Vanessa
Okay.
Jeffrey
All right, all right.
Host Jeff
Am cool with that or do you want to talk about this more?
Vanessa
No, I think I'm ready to move on.
Host Jeff
Good call. You got 30 seconds on the clock to answer as many questions as possible. If you don't know when, you can say pass. But you have to beat Brooke outright if you want to win. Are you ready?
Vanessa
I am ready.
Host Jeff
You got this. Your time starts now. On this day in 2022, during the Oscars, Will Smith slapped what host? What country has the most people in the world with almost 1.5 billion apples float in water because it's 25 air. Do oranges float?
Vanessa
Yes.
Host Jeff
In 1971, the first video game ever created was based off of what sport? Tennis, bowling or golf?
Vanessa
Tennis.
Host Jeff
What color is the Pillsbury Doughboys scarf?
Vanessa
Blue.
Host Jeff
Oh, I liked. I liked how you passed on the ones early just to get to the ones you knew for sure. That was. Well done. Bring Brooke back into the studio here if she's willing to. She found a pimple or she found some ointment or something she wants to rub on me. Most likely inflamed. No, she's just looking at her phone. Anyway, Amy, since you're new, let's get to know you a little bit. It says on my screener that you work at home as an ambulance biller, you have a 22 year old son, and you enjoy hiking and camping. And your favorite segment on this show
Vanessa
is Second date Update.
Jeffrey
Oh, nice.
Host Jeff
Good call. Did you know that you can listen on our podcast too?
Vanessa
Yeah. Oh, yeah, I listen every morning, actually, on the app.
Ashton
Oh, cool.
Host Jeff
On the app.
Brooke
Our station app.
Host Jeff
Station app. You can go to Apple, Spotify, wherever you get your podcast. In fact, we recently ranked the number one show people listen to with the volume at zero, which is interesting. I didn't even know that they tracked that stuff.
Ashton
It counts, but there you go.
Host Jeff
Now we know something about you, Amy, and you've learned something about us.
Vanessa
Sounds good.
Host Jeff
All right, do you want to talk about pimples again or can we go to Brooke?
Vanessa
No, definitely not pimples we're going to
Brooke
go over to some thrilling conversation today, hasn't it?
Host Jeff
Brooke? Are you ready?
Brooke
I'm ready.
Host Jeff
Your time starts now. On this day in 2022, during the Oscars, Will Smith slapped what host, Chris Rock. What country has the most people in the world with almost 1.5 billion Indian apples float in water because it's 25% air. Do oranges float?
Brooke
No.
Host Jeff
In 1971, the first video game ever created was based off of what sport? Tennis, bowling or golf?
Brooke
Tennis.
Host Jeff
What color is the Pillsbury Doughboys scarf?
Brooke
Blue.
Host Jeff
Name the only vegetable that has petals, thorns and a heart.
Brooke
Artichoke.
Host Jeff
All right, we got it all in and it's time to head on over to the scoreboard to see how you bolt it with Jose.
Jose
Hey, do all of us a favor
Host Jeff
and go have a heart attack, you little rat faced.
Jeffrey
I feel like he's talking to me, like directly. Amy, you got three today.
Vanessa
Oh, yay.
Host Jeff
That's not bad, you rat face and rook.
Ashton
Yep, you got five.
Brooke
Holy cow.
Host Jeff
Amy, it was a good showing on your part, but it just wasn't quite enough. Let's go to the over the answers. On this day in 2022 during the Oscars, Will Smith slapped Chris Rock for mentioning his wife's name. The country with the most people in the world, almost 1.5 billion, is India, followed by China with 1.41 billion apples float in water because it's 25% air. Oranges also float. Their porous peels trap a lot of air in there.
Brooke
That makes sense.
Host Jeff
In 1919 71, first video game ever created was based off of tennis. It was the game Pong. The color of the Pillsbury Doughboy scarf is blue to cover the pimples on his chin. And the only vegetable that has petals, thorns and a heart are artichokes. So, Amy, I'm sorry wasn't enough to win today. But the good news is, just for playing, we're giving you a family four pack of tickets to Evergreen Speedway Macaroni kids night NASCAR season opener on on Saturday, April 4. It includes Figure 8 races, fireworks, Easter activities with golden eggs, candy and more.
Vanessa
Awesome. Thank you.
Brooke
Hey, we never heard. Does your 22 year old son also listen to the show?
Vanessa
He did. You know, we used to listen every morning on the way to elementary school.
Brooke
Okay, that was a long time ago.
Jeffrey
10 years ago.
Host Jeff
Yeah, and she kicked him out of the house when she stopped listening.
Brooke
There we go. That's a response.
Host Jeff
Good mom. Anyway, Amy, thanks for being on. I hope you had a good time. You can come back anytime you want to. Okay.
Vanessa
Thank you, everybody. Have a good day.
Host Jeff
Okay, but probably most likely during a trivia time. Yeah, feel free to call in, and Jose will chat with you whenever. Yeah, so we're gonna do Winbrooks Bucks same time on Monday.
Show Announcer
Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Episode: Jeff’s Spring Cleaning Song, Brooke’s Radio Wisdom + In Walks the Ex Date (3/27/26)
Date: March 29, 2026
Podcast Summary by Segment
This episode of Brooke and Jeffrey delivers an entertaining blend of odd news, radio tales, and the signature “Second Date Update” drama. Among the highlights: a record-breaking nose act, Mariah Carey trivia, viral ballpark eating challenges, and an off-the-rails second date derailed by an unexpected ex encounter—with a wild twist after the fact. Plus, Jeff delivers a playful Spring Cleaning song, and Brooke shares hard-earned “Radio Wisdom” from her decades on the air.
Stats show 65% of Americans now see rings as a burden; more couples opt for engagement trips or even tattoos instead.
Notable quotes:
A warm retrospective segment where Host Jeff interviews Brooke about her long, storied radio career. Highlights:
Hidden Camera Mishap: Live-in radio stunt caught her kissing the producer on cam.
Stunt Eating Military Rations: Forced to eat MREs for a month on air—never wants to be in the military.
Diva Interview Disasters: Once witnessed Diddy screaming at his stylist immediately post-interview.
Not Cool Enough for Industry Drug Parties: Naively left out while label execs disappeared for “meetings.”
Cherishing Loyal Listeners: Fond memory of “Candy Penix," her first big fan, who made a shirt with Brooke’s face.
Notable quotes:
Host Jeff calls an insurance client pretending it's bring-your-pet-to-work day. Chaos ensues as he juggles imaginary dogs, birds, a goat, a cow, and an "assistant" named Cheryl (the cow). The mark is flabbergasted, and the call climaxes with a ludicrous cow “assistant” mooing on command.
A parody of Smash Mouth’s “I’m a Believer” called "I’m a Spring Cleaner," full of punchlines about hoarding, lost cats, dirty laundry, and the futility of tidying with kids. Features a live spray bottle sound effect.
Verdict: Must-hear for Second Date Update devotees and long-time listeners alike.