Second Date Update: Capes At Costco

Summary

Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update

Episode: "Capes At Costco" (June 3, 2026)

---

Episode Overview

This episode of "Second Date Update" centers around Amy, a listener who met not one but two men—in strikingly different circumstances—while waiting at the Costco food court. Amy’s quest to understand why her promising encounter with a “businessman” named Kai fizzled is the comedic engine for a show brimming with quirky personalities, Costco elitism, and the group’s trademark irreverent banter.

---

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Amy’s Unlikely Costco Encounters

[04:51]

• Amy recounts meeting two men while waiting for her tires:
  • First: A much younger guy, dressed in a cape, who is revealed to be a LARPer (Live Action Role Player).
    • Amy: “I realize he’s like 10, 15 years younger than me... and he was wearing a cape.” [05:37]
  • Second: Kai, a sharply dressed man in a business suit who made a positive impression by helping a nearby elderly woman.
    • Amy: “He got up right away and helped her clean it up. I just remember that was like really nice.” [08:17]

2. From Food Court Chemistry to "Ghosting"

• Amy and Kai exchange small talk and he gives her his business card, expressing interest in seeing her again.
• Their post-Costco texting soon fizzles out with no explanation, leaving Amy puzzled.

3. The Co-Hosts' Good-Natured Ribbing

• The team pokes fun at Amy’s “hot streak” at the Costco food court and the relative merits of her suitors:
  • On the LARPer:
    • Brooke: “That Larper kid was definitely on his mom’s membership while he was there.” [10:35]
  • On the businessman:
    • “I got a business card once from a guy that in his business, it said he was a love smuggler. His name was Zoltran.” – Brooke [09:22]
  • “Are you getting a better vibe from this guy?” – Co-host 2 [08:07]

4. The Call to Kai: The Real Reason Emerges

[13:10]

• The hosts reach out to Kai, who is initially confused and reticent but eventually explains his reasoning:
  • The deal-breaker, surprisingly, is Amy’s standard-level Costco membership.
  • Kai: “I’ve got the executive level Costco membership, and she doesn’t. Tells me a lot about how, you know, how she takes… the seriousness of, like, her life and her future.” [15:59]
  • Kai further elaborates how the executive membership confers early entry, cash-back rewards, and, in his view, reflects on a person’s financial priorities.
    • “It says to me because it doesn’t cost that much more for the executive membership that you don’t take your financial health seriously.” [17:22]
  • When pressed, Kai stands firm, expressing he can’t be the one to “teach” someone to “get to the next step,” equating membership to status. [17:53]

5. Amy’s Reaction

• Amy expresses disbelief, lightly mocking the superficiality of Kai’s priorities:
  • “I really thought that I met a normal person at Costco, but clearly I didn’t.” [17:40]
  • “Honestly, this whole thing is so stupid.” [20:18]

6. Group’s Reflections and Wrap-Up

• The team comments on the absurdity and exclusivity implied by Costco “status”:
  • Brooke: “I don’t know any single person that has an executive membership to Costco.” [18:56]
  • Co-host 2: “There’s just so much inequality and elitism in this world. I never thought Costco would be contributing to the social divide.” [22:42]
• Amy is offered a “second chance” with the Larper, which the hosts joke is now her only dating option at that particular Costco.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “The worst part is, he was wearing a cape.” – Amy [05:51]
• “You get in an hour earlier with the executive membership. So, like, what—you want me to get there at a normal time and wait online with the rest of the regular people?” – Kai [17:12]
• “He’s not normal, Amy. You met an executive member.” – Co-host 2 [17:51]
• “I thought this all out. It’s just—it’s not worth it.” – Kai, on not dating a non-executive member [18:24]
• “Maybe show him and join Sam’s Club.” – Brooke [20:13]
• “It was—you’re not a high enough Costco member.” – Co-host 2, summing up the rejection [20:06]

---

Important Timestamps

• [04:51] – Amy begins recounting the Costco encounters
• [05:37] – The LARPer reveal
• [08:17] – Kai helps the elderly woman
• [09:41] – Kai’s identity (name) revealed
• [13:10] – Hosts call Kai
• [15:59] – Kai reveals the membership “deal-breaker”
• [17:22] – Kai’s logic about financial priorities
• [20:06] – Kai’s final refusal and Amy’s response
• [22:42] – Hosts reflect on Costco “elitism”

---

Summary & Flow

Amy’s sincere hope of finding romance from a serendipitous Costco encounter gives way to bewilderment as her would-be suitor, Kai, reveals an astonishingly superficial benchmark: executive Costco membership as a proxy for romantic worthiness. The co-hosts’ banter and incredulous commentary heighten the absurdity, offering listeners both laughs and a peculiar window into the unexpected ways modern dating can go sideways. Amy, ultimately unfazed, leaves the episode with her dignity and humor intact, while Kai cements his status—as both executive and deeply idiosyncratic dater.

---

Perfect for those who enjoy:

• Unique dating stories
• Comedy derived from real-life awkwardness
• Satirical takes on modern romantic norms and “status signals”

If you missed this one, you’ll want to listen in full for the group’s chemistry, the date debrief, and, of course, to hear why your Costco membership card may (or may not) stand in the way of true love.

Transcript

[Discover Advertiser]

It's smart to always have a few financial goals and a really smart one you can set earning cash back on what you buy every day. And with Discover, you can get this Discover automatically matches all the cash back you've earned at the end of your first year. Seriously, all of it. And we trust you to make smart decisions. I mean, after all, you listen to this show see [e-mail] creditcard running a

[Odoo Advertiser]

business shouldn't feel like surviving a software group project. One app for accounting, another for inventory, another for sales, and somehow none of them talk to each other. That's where Odoo comes in. An all in one business management software that brings every part of your business together, from sales and accounting to inventory and marketing, all in one powerful platform. No messy integrations, no bouncing between tabs, and best of all, no spreadsheets. Stop managing software and start managing your business with one unified system. Try for free today at odoo.com iheartradio that's O-O-O.com iheartradio this is Bowen Yang

[Bowen Yang]

from Lost Culture Resource with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. We all know the feeling when life gets really busy.

[Matt Rogers]

Taking care of yourself can feel impossible.

[Bowen Yang]

That's why Premier Protein shakes are my go to.

[Matt Rogers]

They have 30 grams of protein, 160

[Bowen Yang]

calories, no added sugar, and they taste amazing.

[Matt Rogers]

So they're a healthy choice you'll actually want to make.

[Bowen Yang]

It's not just for fitness, it's for getting after life.

[Matt Rogers]

Premier Protein powers me to say yes to more.

[Bowen Yang]

Find your favorite [e-mail] that's P R E M I E R protein.com do

[CarMax Advertiser]

you want to find a stress free way to buy your next car? Start at CarMax and shop your way. If you want to browse with confidence, get pre qualified online with no impact on your credit score and shop cars within your budget. From luxury cars to family rides, CarMax has options for almost every price range, including more than 25,000 cars priced under $25,000. So hey, want to get started? Just head to CarMax.com for details and get pre qualified today. Want to drive CarMax?

[Redfin Advertiser]

You're listening to a podcast, so you're doing something else too. Like maybe scrolling home listings on Redfin, saving places you like without thinking you'll get them. Because that's what house hunting has become. But Redfin isn't built for endless browsing, it's built to help you find and own a home. Redfin agents close twice as many deals as other agents, which means when you find A place you love, you've got a real shot at getting it. Redfin helps turn saved listings into real addresses. Get [e-mail]. own the dream.

[Brooke]

All right, we got a new second date episode for you today. It's Brooke and Jeffrey. This is the official podcast and. Oh, yeah, tell them.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, what's wrong, Brooke?

[Brooke]

We need to apologize. We do.

[Co-host 1]

For yesterday's awkward audio.

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Co-host 2]

Oh, yeah.

[Brooke]

So listen, there was a little switch on one of the mics. We are not engineers. Okay. It was flipped on. We didn't realize. We thought it sounded okay in our headphones. It's a long story about how the board works. You don't need to know that. But first, we have some comments.

[Jeffrey]

Can we blame a random person?

[Brooke]

Let's blame Ashton. Okay.

[Co-host 1]

Yeah, your guys comments are really funny about it, though. We got sounds like everyone in the studio is in an empty closet. Are y' all in a wind tunnel? Did they cut the budget and force y' all to make this episode in a closet? I'll stream more. This sounds like you're in the shower recording the show. By the way, Jeff, don't let the soap fall down. Yeah, and then a few more saying, I think you're all in the bathroom together. I bet Jeff's happy about that.

[Brooke]

Yeah, well, yeah, if you missed yesterday's awkward Tuesday, go back and listen the second part. We fixed it.

[Co-host 1]

Yes, it's just part one.

[Brooke]

We've never claimed to be perfect, so, yeah, I believe this is somewhat error free, this new episode. So enjoy the second date for the flaws. Yeah. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Second date update.

[Co-host 2]

If you're single, where is the number one hot place to meet people?

[Co-host 3]

Mm.

[Co-host 2]

I mean, sure, you can meet someone doing the pretzel at a Pilates class or eating a pretzel at a baseball game.

[Brooke]

I actually eat the pretzels at the Pilates class.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah, do both. But what if you could go somewhere where you get the best value for a pretzel plus a date along with it?

[Brooke]

I can't decide. Losing me. Is the pretzel the most important part?

[Co-host 2]

It is. It is the crux of this entire segment, because that place exists. And our listener Amy, says it was the furthest thing from her mind, that she'd end up meeting a guy there. But it happened.

[Brooke]

Oh.

[Co-host 2]

So, Amy, we got to know. Where was this?

[Amy (Listener)]

We actually met at the Costco food court.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah, got a million things. Plus apparently some cute guys on the menu too. Tell us the story. What happened, Amy?

[Amy (Listener)]

Yeah, so I was hanging out in the food court because I was getting my tires done at the tire.

[Brooke]

Oh, I thought you're just putting out the vibes.

[Amy (Listener)]

Oh, yeah, I, you know, I was just like on my phone watching reels on insta, kind of laughing to myself. And then this guy kind of like comes up behind me and he's like, oh, you look like you're having fun over here.

[Co-host 2]

Oh, oh.

[Amy (Listener)]

And he sits across from me.

[Brooke]

And then you finally look up and realize he's cute and not annoying.

[Amy (Listener)]

Well, stay with me. Oh, I realize he's like 10, 15 years younger than me.

[Redfin Advertiser]

Younger.

[Brooke]

Oh, you don't sound very old.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah, he just got out of middle school and he came up to shoot a shot.

[Amy (Listener)]

Well, it's not even the worst part. The worst part is that he was wearing a cape.

[Co-host 2]

Oh, my cape.

[Jeffrey]

Now I'm hoping it is.

[Brooke]

Yeah, Now I am picturing how old is this guy? Are we talking early 20s or are we talking literally teens?

[Amy (Listener)]

Yeah, very early 20s.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Co-host 2]

All right, so the cape is obviously a turn on. Keep going.

[Jeffrey]

Why?

[Brooke]

Because he ask why he's the Costco crusader.

[Amy (Listener)]

Yeah, I had to ask. Turns out he's a LARPer

[Co-host 2]

live action role play. So he had a plastic sword with him.

[Brooke]

I mean, if listeners don't know, it's like where people dress up in like medieval stuff and then they.

[OrderlyMeds Advertiser]

Right.

[Brooke]

Sword fight in parks.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah, I feel like that was pretty self explanatory. But that's okay.

[Brooke]

People don't know it.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah. Just in case.

[Co-host 2]

Okay, so this larper sits down across from you and you are super turned on. What happens next?

[Amy (Listener)]

Well, I'm trying to get rid of him because like I'm just trying to wait for my tires.

[Brooke]

Okay, okay.

[Amy (Listener)]

So he asked, he's like, do you want to go somewhere to eat? I'll pay. And I'm like, no, I'm already had my hot dog. Like I'm just, I'm good.

[Brooke]

Dude, the confidence on this guy.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

To do this. I love it.

[Co-host 2]

That is very bold of him to like not only just ask you out right there. As soon as he met you, he wanted to like take you to a different place and eat somewhere else and

[Brooke]

didn't even take his cape off for it.

[Amy (Listener)]

Well, and then I noticed, I think he was like kind of looking at his friends that were in the corner that also looked like LARPER people.

[Jeffrey]

There's just a group of elves in the. In aisle eight.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

So maybe his friends put him up to this. Is that what you're thinking at that point?

[Amy (Listener)]

Maybe yeah. And then, you know, he leaves finally.

[Brooke]

Okay, okay. Why are you telling us about him if the date isn't with him or easy to.

[Co-host 2]

Is this the guy we're calling?

[Amy (Listener)]

So I'm still in the food court and like 15, 20 minutes later, this guy in a business suit sits diagonal to me. And then we start to talk. You know, it's just like normal small talk. Costco talk. Yeah, I told him about the larper guy. He thought that was funny.

[Jeffrey]

He's like, I'm larping right now. This isn't my suit business.

[Brooke]

Cosplay business.

[Jeffrey]

Larping.

[Co-host 2]

So now you're getting hit on it. Sounds like a second time by Completely different. By a different dude at the same Costco food court. Are you getting a better vibe from this guy?

[Amy (Listener)]

Yes, definitely getting a better vibe. Like there was like this old lady kind of at the table next to us and she spills her Coke. Her diet Coke. And then he like got up right away and like got a bunch of napkins and like helped her clean it up. I just remember that was like really nice. Right?

[Jeffrey]

That is nice.

[Co-host 2]

I know he took his attention away from you to focus on a different woman, some might say, but you know.

[Brooke]

Okay, you'd be jealous.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

A girl gets up from Jeff's date. Excuse me, I'm over here.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah, I think she can handle it herself.

[Brooke]

So did. Did you actually connect with this guy on a romantic level? In the Costco food court.

[Amy (Listener)]

The vibes were good. So I get a text that my tires are ready. I'm like, oh, I have to go, but it was really nice to meet you. And then he gives me his business card.

[Brooke]

All right.

[Amy (Listener)]

And he's like, I'd love to take you out sometime, get to know you more.

[Jeffrey]

What does his business card say? What does he do for a living?

[Brooke]

Kind of weird. Like the business card hun people.

[Co-host 3]

It's.

[Jeffrey]

He's flexing. I would assume he's flexing.

[Brooke]

Not many people carrying him anymore.

[Co-host 2]

Does it just say businessman?

[Co-host 1]

Call me for business Entrepreneur.

[Brooke]

I got a business card once from a guy that in his business it said he was a love smuggler. Oh, yes. His name was Zoltran.

[Jeffrey]

I thought you married him.

[Co-host 2]

That's super weird.

[Jeffrey]

Shout out if you're watching.

[Co-host 2]

All right, but this dude that you met in Costco sounds legit. Does he have a name?

[Amy (Listener)]

Yeah, his name is Kai.

[Brooke]

Kai, okay.

[CarMax Advertiser]

Hi.

[Brooke]

That's a cool name. It is a cool name.

[Co-host 2]

It's better than Zoltran for sure.

[Brooke]

So sorry I never went out With Zoltran. But he did always send me the longitude and latitude of where he was going to be at Burning Man. Everywhere.

[Co-host 3]

Oh, my God.

[Jeffrey]

Now I want to hear about this guy.

[Co-host 2]

The more I know, the less I like. So what's happened since Costco with Kai? Have you been talking to him?

[Amy (Listener)]

Yes. So we texted a little bit, like, a few days after, and then, like, texting kind of stopped. And that was, like, a week and a half ago. Oh, it's, like, so rare to meet someone in person, so I just want to know, like, what's going on? Like, did he meet someone else? Was he, like, not into me?

[Co-host 2]

Well, apparently everybody's meeting everybody at this Costco food court. So is there a chance Kai went back there and found a new woman?

[Jeffrey]

Oh, no.

[Co-host 2]

I mean, at Costco, you get everything in bulk, so why not include dates in that?

[Jeffrey]

They got four girlfriends now.

[Brooke]

There's not that many single people at Costco. Like, that Larper kid was definitely on his mom's membership while he was there.

[Co-host 2]

There's nothing wrong with that.

[Jeffrey]

And he was in a group, too.

[Co-host 2]

All right, well, let's find out when we come back. We'll call Kai the businessman and find out what business he's been up to that's stopping him from going out on a date with you.

[Brooke]

Yeah, what's your business, Kai?

[Co-host 2]

Exactly. We'll do it with your second date update right after this.

[Amy (Listener)]

Thank you.

[Co-host 2]

Hold on.

[Brooke]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Second date update.

[Co-host 2]

An interesting place to meet someone is at the Costco food court. That's what happened to our listener, Amy. She met not just one guy there, but two while waiting for her tires to be done. And the first dude, maybe wasn't quite what she was hoping for. Get a cape on. Was hanging out with his Magic the Gathering friends. And even though she didn't say this, I just got the feeling that he probably asked for a sip of her Sprite.

[Brooke]

Well, he was 10 to 15 years younger.

[Co-host 1]

More of a boy than a man.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

Hey, you got any games on your phone?

[Co-host 2]

You're not gonna drink all of that, are you? Can I sip a second straw in there? But then a second dude walked over, a much better dude named Kai.

[Brooke]

Businessman.

[Co-host 2]

A businessman in a business suit.

[Brooke]

Yeah, all about that business business walk.

[Co-host 2]

Who did all the business talk opposite, pretty much. Till he promptly business ghosted her. Yeah, Amy, who doesn't meet a lot of guys doesn't mean any guys online or a lot of normal guys out in the real world. Wants to know why.

[Brooke]

Yeah, I mean, Amy, you haven't heard back from Kai. Have you been back to the Costco food court? Because that was kind of like a sampling of single men for you at one point.

[Amy (Listener)]

I haven't done my weekly Costco trip yet, but I don't know, I. I want to know what's going on with Kai.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Co-host 2]

Go back to the well.

[Jeffrey]

You know how they always say you want what you can't have?

[Co-host 2]

Yeah.

[Jeffrey]

This is the perfect example. The nice guy wants a date. I'll take you today, right now. If you want to leave right now, I'll go. And then there's the guy that's like,

[Co-host 2]

oh, you're Rooting for the LARPing kid.

[Brooke]

I am.

[Jeffrey]

I forgot to call her back and

[Brooke]

she's like, I need to know.

[Co-host 2]

All right.

[Brooke]

I don't know that we want to date the 20 year old.

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, he's going to be faithful.

[Co-host 2]

I'm sure his mom will be back there to get a bunch of like, chocolate covered pretzels for him when he's done. But first let's focus on Kai. We'll see if he's really, like, ghosting you on purpose or if something else is up. We'll dial his number right now. Here we go.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Hello?

[Co-host 2]

Hey, is this Kai?

[Kai (Businessman)]

Speaking.

[Co-host 2]

Hey, Kai.

[Brooke]

Very businesslike response there, Kai.

[Jeffrey]

Good morning and condolences.

[Brooke]

What?

[Co-host 2]

Oh, God, I don't know how business. Kai, I'm sorry, man. We're a radio show. That's why it's so weird over here.

[Jeffrey]

Hey, good morning.

[Brooke]

Trying to get all up in your business.

[Co-host 2]

Let's take it from a nine down to a two, guys.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Yeah, yeah, I think you guys might have the wrong number.

[Jeffrey]

No, no, sorry, sorry.

[Co-host 2]

We have the right guy because you are somebody who met a listener of ours out recently and it kind of falls underneath the umbrella of this segment that we do called a second date update.

[Brooke]

I mean, kind of loosely.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah, because we know that there wasn't like an actual date that happened.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Yeah, yeah. I haven't been on any dates recently.

[Co-host 2]

Right. But our listener Amy says that you two met at a Costco food court a little while back.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Amy?

[Brooke]

Yeah, Amy. Remember, you sat across from her and she, like, had a pizza. You had a pizza and then you picked up a grandma's drink or.

[Co-host 2]

Brooke, why don't you let you let me handle the details?

[Jeffrey]

Yeah, he spilled the grandma's drink.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah. Old lady nearby spilled her coke and you volunteered to go help her. And Amy thought that was really sweet.

[Kai (Businessman)]

It was okay. I'm sorry, what the. What? What is the point of all of this?

[Brooke]

Well, she liked you.

[Co-host 2]

She felt that there was some sort of connection happening and she thought since you gave your business card to her and you were talking afterwards, there would be another meetup. But that hasn't happened.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Yeah, you know, we did share a couple of texts. I just don't think it's going to work out in the long run, to be honest.

[Brooke]

Can I ask, Kai, at one point, did you think that it would be nice to take Amy out on a date?

[Kai (Businessman)]

Yeah, I mean, that's why I gave her my card. I just, you know, I quickly learned that it just wasn't going to work.

[Co-host 2]

Well, when you say you realize that something was off or it wasn't going to work, what do you mean by that?

[Kai (Businessman)]

I guess different priorities.

[Brooke]

How can you tell what her priorities are? Just a couple of texts. Are we missing something?

[Kai (Businessman)]

I don't want. I mean, this is going to sound. I just don't want to be, like, judged by you guys.

[Jeffrey]

It's okay. You're anonymous.

[Brooke]

That's sweet. You're worried about our opinions.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Look, you know, there are just certain things that you learn about a person and you just realize you're on a different path than them. And so one of those is. I don't know if she mentioned I'm actually. I've got the executive level Costco membership and she doesn't.

[Jeffrey]

Oh, I've heard about that.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Tells me a lot about how, you know.

[Brooke]

Tells you what?

[Kai (Businessman)]

How she takes, you know, the seriousness of, like, her life and her future.

[Brooke]

What?

[Kai (Businessman)]

I'm going. I'm going to Costco two, three times a week. For protein, for bulking and, you know,

[Brooke]

how much protein can you be eating? I'm worried about your digestive system.

[Kai (Businessman)]

I do a lot of meal prep. I do a lot of meal prep.

[Co-host 2]

They already sell everything in bulk, though.

[Brooke]

Wait, are you being seriously. I mean, I just want to know what the normal membership says about someone.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Yeah, it says to me that they just don't prioritize their life.

[Amy (Listener)]

Okay.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Okay.

[Brooke]

Can I.

[Amy (Listener)]

Can I say something?

[Brooke]

Oh, hi.

[Amy (Listener)]

Hello.

[Brooke]

Yeah, I don't know. You didn't opt for the higher level membership of this second date?

[Co-host 2]

Yeah. Kai, that's Amy. She's been waiting on the other line waiting to talk to you.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Oh, come on. Hey.

[Co-host 2]

Sorry.

[Kai (Businessman)]

Hey.

[Amy (Listener)]

Hi. I'm sorry, I just. I just want to. So the reason you don't want to go out is because I don't have the executive Costco membership? Like, that's the issue.

[Brooke]

Yeah, you say it.

[Co-host 2]

So matter of Factly, I think there's some things left unsaid that she needs to hear from you.

[Kai (Businessman)]

All right. You get in an hour earlier with the executive membership. So, like, what, you want me to get there at a normal time and wait online with the rest of the regular people?

[Amy (Listener)]

Oh, my God.

[Kai (Businessman)]

You get 2% cash back rewards with the executive membership, which pays for itself. It says to me, because it doesn't cost that much more money for the executive membership, that you don't take your financial health seriously.

[Co-host 2]

Wow, he brings up some good points, Amy. Do you have anything to say to that?

[Amy (Listener)]

Wow. You know, I really thought that I met a normal person at Costco, but clearly I didn't.

[Jeffrey]

Financially illiterate.

[Co-host 2]

You met an executive member. He's not normal, Amy.

[Kai (Businessman)]

I'm sorry. We're both literally and figurative at just different status levels. And I can't be the one to, like, be teaching you how to. To get to the next step. For me, that's a deal breaker.

[Amy (Listener)]

Oh, my God. This is crazy.

[Brooke]

It's a little on the unusual side. We're trying to.

[Co-host 2]

It is crazy to not take advantage of all the benefits that executive members do get.

[Co-host 1]

Even.

[Brooke]

Even if, like. Even if this is the issue, like, she's not going to stop you from having your membership. You can still go in early.

[Kai (Businessman)]

So what? So I'm going to go in, go early, come back with all my stuff, and she's not even gonna have been able to go yet, and so I'm gonna feel good by that. I thought this all out. It's just. It's not worth it.

[Co-host 1]

Why do you both have to go to Costco so much?

[Co-host 2]

Amy, you're holding him back from his Costco privileges, and he can't afford to do that.

[Amy (Listener)]

Is this serious? Like,

[Jeffrey]

I think there's something else, and this is his experience.

[Co-host 2]

Excuse.

[Jeffrey]

This is pretty weird.

[Brooke]

I don't know any single person that has an executive membership to Costco.

[Jeffrey]

That's a great.

[Amy (Listener)]

Well, that makes sense.

[Co-host 1]

Those out of your friend group because

[Co-host 2]

you're not good enough.

[Brooke]

So, like, how are you gonna meet somebody?

[Co-host 2]

He'll meet somebody when he goes in an hour before the rest of the normies get to go in.

[Brooke]

But executive memberships are all going to

[Co-host 2]

be, like, quality people. Yes. I'm sorry.

[Brooke]

I feel like it's going to be, like, vending machine guys and then married people.

[Jeffrey]

That's a vend machine guy.

[Brooke]

I don't know, like, people who stock the vending machines. They get a lot of their products at Costco. Or maybe people are putting together concession stands for school events. Like that's who you're going to get in that early hour.

[Co-host 2]

You hold them in high regard, though. Clearly.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Co-host 2]

So people helping the community. Yeah, to me.

[Amy (Listener)]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

But they're just not going to be single. That's what I'm saying.

[Co-host 2]

I don't know, Kai. I mean, we always have to offer to ask at the end of this segment every time if you'd like to go on one more date with Amy, despite all of her flaws and shortcomings.

[Brooke]

I mean, what a man you'd be if you could look past it.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah, because we would pay for it.

[Kai (Businessman)]

No, I'm good. Thank you, though. Okay.

[Brooke]

I'm sure Amy's distraught.

[Co-host 2]

Amy, I'm sorry. It was. You're not a high enough Costco member.

[Amy (Listener)]

Yeah, I guess not. I guess I'm not good enough.

[Brooke]

Maybe show him and join Sam's club.

[Jeffrey]

He can't even afford Sam's club.

[Amy (Listener)]

Girl, honestly, this whole thing is so stupid.

[Brooke]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[Co-host 2]

All right, well, I guess it's back to the larper for you, Amy.

[Brooke]

Do that second date that Jose's been wanting.

[Amy (Listener)]

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

[Discover Advertiser]

It's smart to always have a few financial goals and a really smart one. You can set earning cash back on what you buy every day. And with Discover, you can get this. Discover automatically matches all the cash back you've earned at the end of your first year. Seriously, all of it. And we trust you to make smart decisions. I mean, after all, you listen to this show. See [e-mail] credit card.

[Bowen Yang]

This is Bowen Yang from Lost Culture Resource with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. We all know the feeling when life gets really busy.

[Matt Rogers]

Taking care of yourself can feel impossible.

[Bowen Yang]

That's why Premier protein shakes are my go to.

[Matt Rogers]

They have 30 grams of protein, 160

[Bowen Yang]

calories, no added sugar, and they taste amazing.

[Matt Rogers]

So they're a healthy choice you'll actually want to make.

[Bowen Yang]

It's not just for fitness. It's for getting after life.

[Matt Rogers]

The 30 grams of protein gives you the fuel you need.

[Bowen Yang]

It's not just for intense gym sessions.

[Matt Rogers]

It's just for life. With the wide variety of flavors, from

[Bowen Yang]

cafe latte to cake batter, it never feels boring.

[Matt Rogers]

It's a flavor for everyone.

[Bowen Yang]

I personally love the peaches and cream, but maybe you're a root beer floater, cinnamon roll kind of person.

[Matt Rogers]

Premier Protein powers me to say yes to more.

[Bowen Yang]

Find your favorite [e-mail] that's P R E M I E R protein dot com. Or at Amazon, Walmart and other major retailers.

[Co-host 2]

You know, it's funny that she didn't even really argue with him that much over his problem.

[Brooke]

I think she was stunned. Yeah, I mean, honestly, like, I think. I mean, Jose may have said it at one point where he's like, it's got to be something else. Yeah, this has got to be a cover for something.

[Co-host 2]

Was she stunned or did she know deep down that he was right and he is better and she's just not Costco executive material?

[Brooke]

You know, I didn't bring it up, but why would you want to go earlier to Costco? Because they're not going to have the sample people there yet. Oh, it's like going on a Wednesday night, really late. You don't get any of the samples. Not very fun.

[Jeffrey]

You are so good at this.

[Co-host 2]

Just saying, you're just there for the free stuff.

[Brooke]

You gotta go in the prime area to get the free stuff.

[Jeffrey]

I mean, shopping and being fed is a huge benefit.

[Co-host 2]

There's just so much inequality and elitism in this world. I never thought Costco would be contributing to the social divide.

[Brooke]

Oh, my God.

[Co-host 2]

But there they are.

[Brooke]

I know. They're just trying to bring people together in bulk. Backfired.

[Co-host 2]

How did that happen? The good news is no executive status is needed to reach out and email the show.

[Kai (Businessman)]

No, no.

[Brooke]

No status at all. We take anybody.

[Jeffrey]

I mean, you can still pay us if you want. Yeah, but it's not a requirement.

[Co-host 2]

Literally anybody, if you need help with your dating life will call that person who's not calling you back. Go check out our podcasts are up online. Wherever you get yours at.

[Bowen Yang]

Brooke and Jeffrey, this is Bowen Yang from Lost Culture Research with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. We all know the feeling when life gets really busy.

[Matt Rogers]

Taking care of yourself can feel impossible.

[Bowen Yang]

That's why Premier protein shakes are my go to.

[Matt Rogers]

They have 30 grams of protein, 160

[Bowen Yang]

calories, no added sugar, and they taste amazing.

[Matt Rogers]

So they're a healthy choice you'll actually want to make.

[Bowen Yang]

It's not just for fitness, it's for getting after life. The 30 grams of protein gives you the fuel you need. It's not just for intense gym set,

[Matt Rogers]

it's just for life. With the wide variety of flavors from

[Bowen Yang]

cafe latte to cake batter, it never feels boring.

[Matt Rogers]

There's a flavor for everyone.

[Bowen Yang]

I personally love the peaches and cream, but maybe you're a root beer floater, cinnamon roll kind of person.

[Matt Rogers]

Premier protein empowers me to say yes to more.

[Bowen Yang]

Find your favorite [e-mail] that's P-R-E-M-I E R protein.com or at Amazon, Walmart and other major retailers.

[OrderlyMeds Advertiser]

When people turn to healthcare for weight loss, they're looking for real support. That's why more people are choosing orderlymeds.com orderlymeds connects you with real doctors and access to proven GLP1 medications like semaglutide and Tirzepatide. No guessing, just a more supportive experience. And all shipped directly to your door in discreet packaging. Do your research, ask questions, then visit orderlymeds.com podcast for an exclusive offer. That's orderlymeds.com podcast. Individual results may vary. Not medical advice eligibility required. See Cite for details.

[Ryan Reynolds (Mint Mobile Advertiser)]

Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same Premium Wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities. So do like I did and have one of your assistant's assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to [e-mail]

[Co-host 3]

Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month required Intro rate first 3 months only, then full price available, taxes and fees extra. See full [e-mail] Grainger knows when you're

[Grainger Advertiser]

a procurement manager for an office park, you're not managing one building, you're managing all of them. And to stay ahead, you need to see through walls and around corners. Lights about to fail, filters ready to clog H Vac on its last leg. If you wait until something breaks, you're already behind. Count on Grainger for quality products, easy reordering and 24. 7 support. Call 1-800-GRAINGER click grainger.com or just stop by Grainger for the ones who get it done.

[Autotrader Advertiser]

Are you really buying a car online on Autotrader right now?

[Brooke]

Really?

[Autotrader Advertiser]

At a playground?

[Co-host 3]

Yeah, really. Look at these listings from dealers.

[Autotrader Advertiser]

Wow, your search can really get that specific.

[Co-host 3]

Really?

[Autotrader Advertiser]

And you just put in your info and boom. Cars in your budget.

[Co-host 3]

Mom needs a second. Honey.

[Autotrader Advertiser]

You can really have it delivered?

[Co-host 3]

Really? Or I can pick it up at the dealership. One sec, sweetie, Mommy's buying a car.

[Autotrader Advertiser]

I think your kid is walking up the slide.

[Brooke]

Kyle Again? Really?

[Co-host 1]

Auto trader Buy your car online. Really?