Brunch N’ Bible: “The Gift Of People” feat. Mudia Ogbeifun

Summary

Brunch N’ Bible: “The Gift Of People” feat. Mudia Ogbeifun
Release Date: May 13, 2025
Host: Heaven Kore
Guest: Mudia Ogbeifun

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Introduction

In this heartfelt episode of Brunch N’ Bible, host Heaven Kore welcomes her longtime friend and fellow servant of God, Mudia Ogbeifun. Together, they delve into the transformative power of mentorship and sound counsel, emphasizing how God strategically places the right people in our lives to guide us toward our destinies. This episode, titled “The Gift Of People”, serves as an inspiring exploration of community, growth, and the divine orchestration behind meaningful relationships.

Defining Mentorship

The conversation begins with Heaven initiating the topic by asking Mudia to define mentorship. [03:18] Mudia describes mentorship as having someone who has successfully reached a place you aspire to, offering tools, guidance, and support to help you achieve your goals. She emphasizes that mentorship isn't confined to age or hierarchy, highlighting the concept of "horizontal mentorship" where peers can also serve as mentors if they embody grace and wisdom.

Mudia [03:18]: "Mentorship will be going under their leadership, their counsel, seeking advice from them, guidance to get to that next step."

The Importance of Mentorship and Sound Counsel

Heaven underscores the necessity of viewing people as gifts, stressing that no one is an island. She connects the absence of mentorship to potential mistakes and lost destinies among women today. Mudia echoes this sentiment, pointing out that isolating oneself opens the door to negative influences and self-destruction.

Heaven [02:10]: "When we looked at people as a gift, I want us to look at it in the lens of mentorship and counsel."

Mudia [06:38]: "I would say it is costing us our destiny."

Impact of Lack of Mentorship on Women

The discussion highlights how modern cultural shifts towards self-reliance and isolation can derail women's spiritual and personal growth. Both hosts discuss the pervasive pride that prevents many women from seeking or accepting help, leading to feelings of being overwhelmed and vulnerable to the enemy's tactics.

Heaven [07:21]: "We have too much pride, especially as women. We could be drowning."

Personal Stories and Testimonies

Mudia shares her personal journey of transformation through mentorship. After accepting Christ in July 2021, she experienced a significant promotion and relocation, which led her to a supportive church community in Minnesota. Under the guidance of her mentors, Mudia discovered and pursued her passion for media, transitioning from graphic design to building websites and public relations.

Mudia [10:41]: "I was building websites I didn't even know when that started doing public relations, media communication."

Heaven adds her own experiences, detailing how mentors have pushed her beyond her perceived limitations, leading her to manage worldwide tours and organize international events.

Heaven [17:57]: "Now I'm building websites... Now I'm building websites I don't even know when that started doing public relations."

Qualities of a Good Mentor

Mudia outlines the essential qualities that make someone worthy of being a mentor. She emphasizes the fruit of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control—as indicators of a biblically sound mentor. Additionally, she warns against mentors who lack humility or prioritize their own needs over the mentee's growth.

Mudia [24:45]: "Biblically, do they have the fruit of the Spirit?"

Heaven reinforces that mentors should align with biblical truths and be genuinely invested in the mentee's holistic well-being.

Heaven [27:38]: "The Bible says, follow me as I follow Christ."

Challenges in Receiving Counsel and Rebuke

The hosts discuss the difficulty many face in receiving correction, often mistaking it as a rejection of their identity rather than addressing specific behaviors or situations. They stress the importance of mentors delivering counsel with love, wisdom, and appropriate timing to ensure it is received constructively.

Mudia [22:27]: "I think it's hard for some people because they think I'm rebuking your identity and not the situation."

Heaven [23:50]: "You can't even receive anything that I have to say because you're like, oh, no, everybody's against me."

Biblical Examples of Mentorship

Heaven and Mudia draw parallels from the Bible, illustrating how mentorship has been pivotal throughout scripture. They reference Gideon’s affirmation, Eli and Samuel’s relationship, and Aquila and Priscilla mentoring Apollos, demonstrating that mentorship aligns with God's design for personal and spiritual development.

Heaven [14:12]: "We look at the story of Gideon... the angel of the Lord locates him and says, you mighty men of valor."

Mudia [38:03]: Refers to Aquila and Priscilla mentoring Apollos.

Impact of Mentorship on Personal Growth

The episode highlights how mentorship can accelerate personal and spiritual growth by providing guidance, accountability, and the unveiling of God’s purposes. Mudia shares how mentors helped her recognize and pursue her God-given talents, while Heaven recounts how her mentors have stretched her roles beyond her comfort zone, fostering her development into a leader.

Heaven [20:25]: "Because of who you've placed in my life, I cannot fall."

Mudia [31:49]: "It will save you time. It will collapse time."

Conclusion

Heaven and Mudia conclude by reaffirming the significance of mentorship in a believer’s life. They encourage listeners to seek out biblically sound mentors who embody the fruit of the Spirit and to remain open to receiving counsel with humility. The episode wraps up with a powerful prayer, asking God to place the right people in listeners’ lives and to protect them from the enemy’s attempts to sow distrust and isolation.

Mudia [48:12]: "Heavenly Father, we just thank you, we thank you Lord, for the gift of people."

Heaven urges listeners to share the episode with those who may benefit, emphasizing that mentorship is a divine gift designed to nurture and propel individuals toward their God-ordained destinies.

Notable Quotes

• Heaven [02:10]: "People are a gift. We just have to admit that no man is an island."
• Mudia [06:38]: "It is costing us our destiny."
• Heaven [04:22]: "One woman of God says that you can be age mates, but not grace mates."
• Mudia [24:46]: "Biblically, do they have the fruit of the Spirit?"
• Heaven [14:12]: "We look at the story of Gideon... the angel of the Lord locates him and says, you mighty men of valor."
• Mudia [31:49]: "It will save you time. It will collapse time."
• Heaven [42:23]: "Mentorship will shave years of mistakes off of your life, your destiny."
• Mudia [48:12]: "Heavenly Father, we just thank you... for the gift of people."

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This episode of Brunch N’ Bible serves as a compelling reminder of the indispensable role that people play in our spiritual and personal growth. Through heartfelt dialogue and personal testimonies, Heaven Kore and Mudia Ogbeifun inspire listeners to embrace the gift of mentorship, seek out godly counsel, and cultivate meaningful relationships that honor God and advance His kingdom.

Transcript

[A]

Welcome to Brunch and Bible, where we navigate womanhood through the Word. I'm your host, Heaven, and this is more than a podcast, it's a movement. At Brunch and Bible, women gather, grow spiritually, embrace the complexities of life through word driven discussions, and find practical applications for their own journeys. In this episode, we sit down to explore the power of mentorship and sound counsel and how God places the right people in our lives at the right time for guidance, growth and purposes. We dive into the importance of discerning your destiny, helpers, the beauty of community, and how to steward the gift of people. Well, hey, everyone. Welcome to Brunch and Bible, where we navigate womanhood by the Word. I am back with a new episode and I have another lovely, lovely guest. I'm here with Mudia.

[B]

Hello.

[A]

Hello. Say hi to the people.

[B]

Hey, y' all.

[A]

Yes. And so Mudia is another sister. Sister of mine. I just have so many sisters and we're gonna talk about that in this episode. Right? But I'm just grateful she's another woman of God. Powerful minstrel. She's a servant of God. She is a minister of God. And what's so beautiful about our relationship is actually that we've known each other since we were little girls, actually.

[B]

Yeah, like little girls.

[A]

I remember my mom taught you in Sunday school. She did, exactly. And so then to further that university, cross paths again. Yeah, Right. And now in Christ, we, we cross paths again. So it's lovely to have you. I think this is your first, very first time. I'm so excited on Brunch and Bible. So, guys, listen, Mudia, she is the real deal. So I want you all for this episode to sit down. First off, grab some water, grab some tea, whatever you have to grab. Put your seat belt on, buckle up, because it's about to be a ride. Today we're talking about the gift of people, and people are a gift. We just have to admit that no man is an island. Right? No man can actually do things on their own.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

And so when we looked at people as a gift, I want us to look at it in the lens of mentorship and counsel. I think that especially for women in this day and age, a lot of mistakes, a lot of even life circumstances that some of us go through is as a result of a lack of mentorship and a lack of sound counsel. Right. And so I just want us to just hit the topic off by what, what is the actual role? Right? What, what is it? When a woman actually has good mentorship, what can she Expect out of her life when she has people that are in her life that are guiding her. Actually, let's actually start off with what is mentorship? I think that's a good question to start off with because some people may not know that term. Like, okay, what do you mean by I need to have a mentor? What do you mean by I need to have sound counsel? So let's answer that question first and then we'll get into what the role of it plays. What do you think mentorship is?

[B]

Yeah, I think for me, I mean, it's relative to each person. But for me, I feel like mentorship, I view it as if I have a place that I want to be and someone has gotten to that place successfully. They have the tools, the counsel, the guide to support me to also reaching that point. And so mentorship will be going under their leadership, their counsel, seeking advice from them, guidance to get to that next step. And a lot of times mentions mentorship is not necessarily somebody older because a lot of times they think like, oh.

[A]

Like father, son, it needs to be.

[B]

It has to be like a hierarchy. And there is a place for that.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

But mentorship can be a horizontal pathway as well, especially if you have a peer, a co worker, somebody who might be of the same age range as you, same field as you, also a woman like you, who is actually already walking in the grace that God has given that person already before yours come. You can take note ahead of time.

[A]

That's. That's one. One woman of God says that you can be age mates, but not grace mates.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

You understand.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

So there are certain people that God has bestowed, you know, a certain level of grace or wisdom, especially most specifically for where you're going in life, that he will align you to, to help mold you and shape you. So the Bible talks about how we are the clay and he is the potter.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

And so we are a people. When we come, we're in raw materials.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You understand? So we come, we come into Christ and we're raw materials. It's like you're trying to bake a cake. Right. The end goal is a cake.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But you have flour, you have egg, you have oil, you have all these things and you need help. Somebody who's going to come and make, mix all those things together, bake you. Right. And. And in the end, you come out with the fruit of the product that the Lord wants. And we see so many different examples of, you know, mentor mentee relationships in the Bible. And I think it's something that even as women, we must key into. I think the first thing I want us to talk about is why. Why do we. In this day and age, there's this I can do bad, you know, by myself kind of mentality.

[B]

Don't trust nobody.

[A]

Exactly how has that affected our generation today, that mentality?

[B]

I would say it is costing us our destiny. Because the truth of the matter is the gift of people is a key currency of the kingdom of God. Come on, woman, you cannot go through life alone. You are not meant to handle the situations of life by yourself. The Bible even says it's not good for man to be alone. I know a lot of times we associate that to marriage, but it can be also any aspects of our life. We need people. Absolutely. And so when we go into this culture of I don't need nobody, I don't trust nobody, nobody's my friend. You're trying to out here to get me what that is. You. You're pushing yourself into isolation.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And what that is is now. Now you're in the enemy's playground. Because now once he has your mind, he has everything else. Absolutely all your actions, your behavior, everything that you do is based off of what you think. And now the enemy has hold of your mind and is also telling you, yeah, you don't need them, see. Yeah. They don't like you. Yeah. You don't ask them for question. The last time you asked them for questions, they threw it in your face. They did this. And you're just soaking that up like a song sponge. And you're going deeper and deeper and deeper into isolation. And you're not realizing that it is costing you everything.

[A]

Do you? Do you. What you said there was so key. Do you know this generation has so much pride?

[B]

Oh, absolutely.

[A]

We have too much pride, especially as women. We could be drowning.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And ask for help and not ask for help, and we will be sinking, dying. And you know, when I was preparing for this, the Lord had told me that pride is not only thinking that you can do big and bad all by yourself, but it's also not asking for help and thinking that you will be a bother to somebody. That is pride still.

[B]

Yeah, it's still pride.

[A]

It's still pride. For you to suffer in silence is pride because somehow, some way, the enemy has convinced you. He has told you that nobody can help me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This situation, nobody understands or they don't want to. They don't want to. I'm going to be a bother to them.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They already have so much going on. I Don't want to come and add my problem. We do this. And that has been the detriment of so many women.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

Like you said, it has caused so many women their destiny just because they couldn't open up their mouth and ask for help.

[B]

Yeah, absolutely. It's unfortunately. And I can relate to that because I went through a season of that for sure. I grew up where I'm a. Words of affirmation, girly.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So unfortunately, the enemy has used that as a target where people have used their words to destroy me. And so for me, I grew up in a situation where I feel like, okay, well, if you don't have access to me, then you cannot hurt my feelings. Right.

[A]

So I'm shutting you out.

[B]

So I'm shutting you out. And honestly. And I thought I was doing a good thing. And it took a season of God to put me in the middle of true God given mentors to show me that.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

People are actually amazing. Because I really thought that people are terrible. I got to the point where I felt like people were the worst creation.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Mind you, God created people. Right. And we serve a purpose. But I had to go through that, then go into actual biblical counsel. Biblical mentorship.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

One that is actually God given.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And where love truly, truly exist. Right. To show me that people aren't all that bad and they actually want to help. Because why take an exam when somebody already has the answers?

[A]

Come on. Come on.

[B]

Save yourself distress. I think this life is too short.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

To be acting crazy.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And not ask for help. And I get it. I get it. A lot of times people have been through so much, so they're trying to save themselves from that risk. But you know, you never know until you take a chance. And as the phrase that my dad always said, closed mouths don't get fed.

[A]

Come on. And one thing that you. You said that was so good is that you thought you were doing a good thing for yourself. And so many of us think that we are protecting our energy, we're protecting our space. We're. We use these terminologies. I don't know what, but we use the. Like, I'm protecting my energy, keeping my peace. Keeping your peace. Whole time you are sh. Shutting out God ordained help for your life. I want us to talk about how mentorship has shaped our life's journey. You taught. You touched on it a little bit, but I want you to kind of get further into and give us examples of how it truly has transformed you.

[B]

Yeah. No, absolutely. So once I gave my life to Christ. July 3, 2021. So it's actually still pretty recent. And shortly after, in October of that same year, 2021, I. I got a promotion in my workplace and I moved to Minnesota.

[A]

Yes, I remember.

[B]

And I thought that I was just going there for just job promotion. Little did I know that the Lord had already prepared a place for me and he took me into a season of consecration. But it wasn't isolation, right? Because he put me in the middle of a church group. It was a small group, small church. RCCG loved them to today. And I was under their leadership as the guard director. And they loved on me so much, it made no sense. I threw them. I understood what love really meant.

[A]

That's beautiful.

[B]

And. But under their mentorship, they gave solid advice. They also gave godly rebuke. Yeah, right, correction. They fixed some of my attitude problems. They showed me. They exposed myself to me in a loving way. Right. And it was just a beautiful experience. And one of the things, I'll give you an example of one of their counselor. I remember at one time, Pastor, he sat me down, invited me over to his house at me down, he was like, hey, Maria, I think you should open a media business. A media business, right? And I was like.

[A]

Media.

[B]

What does me and media go together? Right. But at that time, I used to help the church with graphic designs.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

Like, you know, it's a small church, everybody wears the same hats. You know what I mean? Everybody. One person's holding camera. One person.

[A]

Exactly. We know those ones.

[B]

We know the vibe. Vibes, okay? And so I used to do a lot of, like, the program, event planning. I'll create the menu, create the program, do graphic design, poster and whatever stuff. And he used to be like, oh, Mudia, you're gifted in this area. This. And I was. I'm using Canva, I'm using Adobe. It's not that deep. And he was like, no, no, no, no, no. It is that deep. And he kept pressuring me. But the thing about it is that he saw what I didn't see.

[A]

That's it.

[B]

And that is the value of mentorship, because they can see what you. You can't see. And I remember I took it to God in prayer and I was like, God is. And he was like, yeah, it's a thing. And I think you should pursue it today. That media business is what's feeding me.

[A]

Are you serious?

[B]

Even the 9 to 5 job, I don't have it anymore.

[A]

Are you serious?

[B]

Now I'm building websites I don't even know when that started doing public relations, media communication, I didn't realize what he was saying until this season.

[A]

Oh, my goodness.

[B]

The power of mentorship.

[A]

Guys, I told you, buckle up, Right? Okay. Buckle up. Because we're actually just getting started. That, that was so amazing. You mentioned so many key things. I want to mention at least 2 of of the things you talked about. The first one is that your community or your sound counsel, your mentors, those pastors showed you what love really. And what's so unfortunate, especially nowadays, is that there has been so much backlash, for sure. So much. We see so much exposure.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's one pastor is one.

[B]

It's rough out here.

[A]

Listen, if you're going through that. My sentiments. It can be tough. I, I, I'm sure of it. But we don't talk enough about how true mentorship will show you the love of Christ.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

Because what Christ does is he sees in us what we don't see in ourselves.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

We look at the story of Gideon and this, I mean, this doesn't have to do with men's church, but it still is a parallel that Gideon was the least in his house.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And he was from the weakest tribe.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And he's minding his business. And the angel of the Lord locates him and says, you mighty men of valor. And he's like, what are you talking about right now? I'm the weakest man in my family. We come from the weakest tribe.

[B]

Nobody checking for me.

[A]

What are you talking about? Mighty men of valor. So the angel of the Lord comes.

[B]

To affirm, affirm his destiny.

[A]

And so we see that in mentorship, our mentors are supposed to come and affirm our, our destiny, our call. I'll give a short example. I have so many great mentors towards, and that is what has shaped me by the grace of God. Because God uses men to. Where I am today, operating and doing whatever I'm doing now is as a result of healthy mentorship relationships.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

I remember. I have so many stories, but I'll give a general one, and then I'll give a more specific one. I have a pastor, youth pastor, that is in my life heavily. He is one of God's greatest gifts to me. He has been there for me like family. Right. And we work together with, if anybody knows, I serve with youth and I help teach them. I help put, you know, organize programs for them. And this man would stretch me so, so much. He would be like, yeah, I need you to teach next Sunday, and I need you to do this. And you need to put together this program. And this, this like, bro, who told you I was a public speaker?

[B]

Thank you. When did I sign contract?

[A]

Who told you that? This is my niche. This is my forte. I don't even like speaking, honey, as much as I speak now, I do not like the microphone.

[B]

For once, he gives the mic to.

[A]

And so he's like, no, I need you to teach. I actually. Okay, you taught for the first quarter, but I actually need you to teach more. It wasn't. I'm like, for this conference, I want you to speak. Meanwhile, I'm helping organize the conference.

[B]

You're actually doing stuff.

[A]

So this man, whether I. Before I knew it, he was, he was beckoning me into destiny. He was pulling me. He was speaking to my spirit man.

[B]

Saying, heaven come and come to alignment. Yes.

[A]

So that's that. That's one there. There's another one where I've always naturally liked to organize programs. Even remember the days of college, I, I love to put together even. I was on asa. Anybody on African Students Association. Shout out. Anyways. Yeah. I was on Purdue's ASA team or executive team, and I had the programs management role. And I was in charge of making sure the events were going well, even with. We used to have a dance troupe called Afro. Afro.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And at a point, I was president and I was organizing dance conferences and these and putting women together and doing this, this and that. And so I came into Christ. And, you know, when you come into Christ, there are certain things that you have to let go of naturally. But God doesn't always ask you to let go of what innately is in you. And that passion was always there. And God sent a mentor to me to literally. Oh, my gosh.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Pull me into a place of destiny. One day, I'm just minding my business, and I get a call and he says, listen, that's how it be.

[B]

That's how it starts.

[A]

He says, you know, I just want you. I, I, I see you know what you're doing. And mind you, I'm doing it in little capacity. I'm serving here small, organizing this, this, and here. And he's like, yeah, I need you to be my tour manager. Yeah, we're. We, we travel the world. We do this.

[B]

Like, huh, Who.

[A]

What do you see in me? Because who told you that I can manage worldwide tours?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And when I tell you we are, and by God's grace, I accept it. And that thing has stretched me so much. We're organizing events all over the world.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I've been to Accra. I've been to listen all parts of the United States, Canada. You're everywhere, literally doing these things that I never thought I'd be able to do. Why? Because of the. Because of the power of mentorship. They come to shape us. They come to mold us. They come to call us into a place of destiny. And as women, we need that.

[B]

That. We need it.

[A]

We need that desperately. We need it.

[B]

It's biblical.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

It's biblical. The Bible says in Proverbs 11:14 that at no counsel, the people fall.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

But in the multitude of counselors, there is safety. And it says not just one, the multitude. So not supposed to have one. You multiple. Multiple counselors, multiple mentorships that can. Because everyone comes with different perspectives.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

So once you have multiple who are sound, actual sound, you are literally almost like forming your life barrier, a boundary around your life and your life situations.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

So it's. I agree with you. The power of mentorship.

[A]

And, you know, God has always given me this analogy of a bowling. A bowling alley. When you bowl, you have two ways that you can bow. You can bowl in the way where there's no guardrails up. And you take a chance that when you roll that ball, you could hit the gutter. You could strike out, but you could also hit the gutter.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's a second way that you can bowl where you lift those guardrails up, and there's absolutely no chance that you're gonna hit the gutter ball. And that's kind of how mentors are. They kind of form this wall. You cannot, like I always say that because of who you've placed in my life, I cannot fall.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it's not even saying that I'm placing my hope and trust in man. No, no, no, no, no. But literally, there are people who are in my life that are watching me that won't allow me.

[B]

That would allow you to fall. And that's why sometimes I. I wonder, like, if you truly love somebody and watch them fall. When we talk about enablers. Right.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Right. Because a lot of times people think that they're doing you a favor but not calling it out.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Because they don't want to hurt your feelings. Right. Let me not correct her. She's sensitive. Let me not say the wrong thing. Let me tiptoe around her. But what you don't realize that you're doing is that you're not allowing that person to build the endurance that is needed for life.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They're not building accountability. They're not building Stability, they're not building responsibility. So when life goes knocking at their door, they crumble. And then you, the enabler is not going to be trying to help them pick themselves up. When you, in the beginning, you could have been like, hey, sis, you know, you say things like this maybe out of love. Right. And so I always encourage people too, when it comes to counsel and correction, to receive it with a place of love.

[A]

There we go. Why, why do you think that? On the flip side, why do you think that it's so hard to receive.

[B]

Receive.

[A]

Rebuke. Right? Because the Bible talks about God chastised.

[B]

Those who he loves. Yes.

[A]

Right. So we know that if there's anywhere where love is, there will be rebuke. Because I'm not going to sit down and watch your life go haywire when God has given me the grace for you and the grace to help guide and advise you. And so on the flip side, why is it so difficult for us to receive there? There's some people who are more conditioned to it. But yeah, even if you want to talk about an experience where you were a bit hard headed or, you know, like, why do you think that it's so hard for us to.

[B]

I honestly, the first thing that comes to mind, I think it's hard for some people because they think I'm rebuking your identity and not the situation.

[A]

Come on.

[B]

Because you're the person that is in the situation and I rebuke it or I give correction. You think that I am rebuking you or rejecting you. I'm rejecting you and that's not the case. And I think a lot of times people feel that way because of the approach at which the correction is presented.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I always say this too. When offering correction, you have to be very. Use wisdom with that and also strategy. It's also not just using going out here saying anyhow.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

How do you say it? And is that the right time to say it? I can be like, hey, heaven, you know, I think I was watching your video and maybe you should wear a darker color due to the lighting. And what you heard is, Mudia hates my dress.

[A]

She doesn't like me.

[B]

She doesn't like me. She doesn't like me. She hates me this, this and that. But what I didn't realize that 10 minutes ago somebody came up to you, you and actually told him that they hated your dress. And so here I am, coming 10 minutes later, offering sound correction from a true place of love and no malice. But it was that time, wrong timing.

[A]

The timing was wrong.

[B]

And so, baby, you can't even receive anything that I have to say because you're like, oh, no, everybody's against me. I'm done. Cut the show.

[A]

That, that, that. That's so good. That even segues us into the next question, which is, what makes someone mentor worthy? What makes someone, you know, worth submitting to as far as their counsel? Because there are so many different kinds of people in.

[B]

Oh, yeah, for sure.

[A]

There's people who are successful. It doesn't mean that they should be your mentor. It's people who have gone ahead and done some things, and they're movers and shakers. But that does not mean that that is the person that God is revealing to you to guide your life. Right. And so what are some qualities that make someone mentor worthy?

[B]

Truthfully, the one thing I'll say, it doesn't have to be hard.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

Simple. Biblically, do they have the fruit of the Spirit? Okay, those are those seven attributes is what you're looking for. Do they have love or do they have joy? Do they have peace? Why would you want to be under a mentorship? Their whole person's life is scattered. Do they have. Are they faithful? Do they have loyalty? Right. Are they patient? You know, and I would say also avoid if, like we talked about, pride. If somebody is not humble before God, baby, they're not taking your case to God. If they can't even bring themselves to the feet of Jesus, it's not your matter. They will not go and carry together to Jesus because it's not about just giving advice. Are they interceding on your matter?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Are they seeking God's counsel concerning you?

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Is it also one of those things where it's all about me? Right. The. The person who is giving you mentorship, you are like a slave. Intern. Me, me, me, me, me. What you can do for me, how you can help me shine my shoes. Oh, it's mentorship. You are learning discipleship, but it has no benefit fit to you. I always say avoid that. And most of the time, the. The. The foundation of it all in terms of quality, I will go back and say love. The Bible says love is patient. Love is kind. Love does not keep malice. Right. And so when you're looking for someone who has good mentorship, I say look for the fruit of the Spirit and not the gift of the Spirit.

[A]

Come on.

[B]

A lot of times we are looking for Pastor so and so, prophetess, A and B, healer. This and this. This person has built this cnd. Cnd. They have built this church, or so they must know. But you will have some people who are in those positions and are totally wicked. There is no sign of the fruit of the spirit.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That is not going to benefit you in any way. And also, before you go looking for mentorship, because you have to be careful because a lot of time people have orphan spirit.

[A]

You. You need somebody to hide under.

[B]

You need somebody to be. I need a. I need a spiritual fight. I need a spirit. At the end of the day, God is your father no matter what. So there should be no counsel that goes above his word.

[A]

Yes, absolutely.

[B]

If anything, all other words, submit to his. And if it doesn't, then you gotta look, look, look, look again, look again. And so a lot of times, if we get so hungry for mentorship, hungry for leadership and counseling, we end up submitting ourselves to things that we shouldn't submit ourselves to.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

And we have to just be very careful in that.

[A]

Yeah. I think for me, honestly, a mentor is that someone who's mentor worthy is someone who follows God.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The Bible. The Bible said. Paul said, follow me as I follow Christ.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so it's actually biblical to have a man to.

[B]

To follow. Yes.

[A]

So let's debunk that right now.

[B]

Right now there are some people out here saying, follow nobody.

[A]

Oh, please, please don't. Don't listen to those people. Listen. Men is biblical. Right. We see so many healthy relationships in the Bible. We see Eli and Samuel. We see even Moses and his father in law. We see Ruth and Naomi. Like, it's countless. Right. But the biggest thing is, are these people following Christ?

[B]

Yep.

[A]

That's the biggest thing. Because if you don't have someone who's falling to Christ, you're going to find yourself in some error at some point. At some point, you'll find yourself in error. And I mean, someone who. I think one thing that I've noticed in my healthy mental relationships is somebody who's not just interested in building you up spiritually, but also invested in you.

[B]

As a person, as a whole.

[A]

A whole being, wholeness. Because they can say, oh, let's go and pray. But even those little things like, yo, like, how was your ball game? Like, or they're just personal endeavors. They're invested in you.

[B]

Literally. I had the same pastor, his wife, I love her to death. She will go to JCPenney and be going shopping.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

She'll see my size. She'll buy it.

[A]

I saw.

[B]

I can show Muti. I saw this shirt. You like it so much. Or she'll Be. She's cooking for her weekly meals.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

She'll add my own food in there. She will come to my own apartment and drop it off. She didn't say, oh, come and pick it. That. She didn't say, oh, we are praying today. You know, like, she's concerned about other things about me, so. I absolutely agree with you on that point.

[A]

Yeah. And then I think another point is someone who's wise. The Bible says, if in all your gettings, get understanding, chase after wisdom. If you look at all of proverbs, it's literally, I could go verse by verse, wisdom. Because in that wisdom, that man or that woman will know exactly what to do.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

When to do it. We talked about timing.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I. In my. More. Some. In my mentor relationships, there's one of my mentors that. That he took his time. He wasn't in a rush. Oh, come under my wing. No, no, no. He watched me from a distance.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

He learned my ways. He learned. He was scanning me, scanning my resume.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. I see this girl. I see how she moves. I see this is what she's dealing with. This is what. And as a result, he was able to tailor, you know, his mentorship to me personally. Because you can be a mentor and have several mentees, but you're not treating them all the same. They have different needs. Absolutely right. And so, you know, one of my mentors, his birthday just passed, and she's like, listen, you reveal dimensions of God to me. That is what mentorship is supposed to do, is if that. Exactly. If you cannot be revealed dimensions of God through your mentor, I want you to go back and put pray to make sure that you are under the right mentorship.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They are supposed to reveal dimensions of. Of Jesus to you. Yeah. Because it's.

[B]

It's. It's.

[A]

It's God working in them to correct you, to mold you, to shape you. Absolutely right. They're an extension of his hands, his eyes, his mouth.

[B]

Yep. Y.

[A]

Well, I think. I think mentorship is a beautiful thing, and we also have to watch out for manipulation. Like, Moody was talking about manipulation. Manipulation is very easy where you feel like. And I always tell my team that serves with me, hey, as much as you're pouring in to this. This vision, you also need to be poured into. So we do. We. The last time we were doing a seminar where everybody can benefit. You know what I mean? There's a time where it's, okay, I need to do X, y, and Z. There's a time for that. But overall, if your mentor Relationship is draining you. Like when I say draining you and you. You are not getting what you need to get.

[B]

Just this. Yeah. It's okay to just reevaluate it.

[A]

Reevaluate.

[B]

Thank you so much. Respectfully. Love you. And I think that's. You hit a key point too, because that very reason was a reason why I did not attend a certain. A certain church when I moved back home to Indy from Minnesota. When I came back home, there was a recommendation of a church that of course my leaders has suggested to go to. And I mean, they're amazing people, wonderful people. But I remember the first encounter I came to the church and literally I met the pastor and everything and he was like, oh, you are so and so. This person said so much about you. I heard that you have this business and do this. We need this. We need that. The church is struggling. Yeah. Mind you, this is my first time.

[A]

He didn't even say, hey, how are you? What's. What do you like to eat? What is your favorite color?

[B]

He was telling me all the problems of the church and how I'm going to come to solve his problem.

[A]

You're the savior. That.

[B]

Oh man. If they where that red flag guy, if he could wave it as high. And so to me at least he. That probably wasn't his intention. But in that moment, I felt like, oh, I'll be you used here.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

If you're only worried about what I can do for you. You don't even know anything about my life. You haven't even started to ask questions and you're already saying like, this is how you can help me. This is how the church needs you. Oh, honey, I already knew that this mentorship, it wasn't gonna go far.

[A]

And one thing I want us to know is that although you have mentorship, it does not replace your personal seek with God.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Understand that.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Because once you do that, you enter into what is called idolatry. Thank you, ma' am. And then what happens is sometimes God actually has to rip your leaders from you. Not because that was the whole intent. Sometimes they're actually meant to come into your life to bless you.

[B]

To bless you.

[A]

But you have now made them your firm foundation.

[B]

And that is a sinking sound. It doesn't. He will never anyone taking a step place. It doesn't matter how amazing they are.

[A]

No.

[B]

I literally had a situation where when I was moving back home, it was a desire of mine, but it was also an assignment from the Lord to move back home. And I remember I. He told me quit Your job. And you have until this month to move back in Indiana. I said, you want me to do.

[A]

How are we going to now what?

[B]

What is everything all right? You know, it's my enemies, my village people are work here. And literally I remember, of course I sought counsel and I was like. And person A said don't. Why would you quit your job and do this Wisdom says person B, same thing. And then got to put on s a question. Maybe I did not hear correct correctly, but. And when I got to that point, the fire that was lit up my butt, it was like, no, you heard me. And so go. So at the end of the day, God's counsel, we always stand above any mentorships counsel. And the only way you can know that that person is like you talk about your own personal walk with God and even going back to the attributes you talked about following Christ. But is that person biblically sound?

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

Everybody can follow Jesus, but it's every. Are you biblically, biblically style?

[A]

Are you grounded in the word?

[B]

Are you grounded in the word balances? That balances. And honestly anchors it anchors. And the only way you are going to know that they are biblically sound is if you are biblically sound. If not, anything they say goes, yep, absolutely.

[A]

And one thing that I love because we said that in a multitude of counsel there's safety. Right. I have multiple counselors and multiple mentorship. But one thing, I was actually telling my friend this the other day that I know that these people, not only do they hear from the Lord, but they are people of the word. Because not once.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

By the grace of and the mercies of God have their counsel ever contradicted one another.

[B]

Come on, come on.

[A]

I'm telling you, it should never. It shouldn't, it shouldn't, it shouldn't. If these are people of the word, if these are people who hear from the Lord, even they're hearing, they will check it.

[B]

They will check it. And going back to that situation when they were like, oh, I'm not sure you should do this. They again, because you always have the flesh that might speak first. And if you have a sound counselor, they go back into time within the word and in prayer and they came back and say, yeah, it's time for you to go.

[A]

Yeah, that's how you know. Exactly.

[B]

It should always correlate with each other.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

God can be saying A and the God giving counselors are saying B. I.

[A]

I can't understand that until I can. Yo, this is a concept that guys, it can match my head I don't get it. Yeah, it should all align. It's one God.

[B]

It's one sound. One voice.

[A]

One voice.

[B]

One voice. And. And I just pray that women out here and anybody, any gender realizes the value of. Of people, the value of counsel, the value of community, the value of fellowship. And know that God designed this for you. Absolutely. It doesn't have to be hard. It really doesn't have to be hard. And it only becomes hard when you are now making that person your God.

[A]

Absolutely. Absolutely. Now, on the flip side, mentorship requires a lot of humility.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because sometimes you may think, you know what you know, honey, and he will bring a mentor to be like, sis.

[B]

You don't know Jack.

[A]

We even see this in Scripture. It talks about how in Acts 18, verses 24 to 26, it talks about Aquila and Priscilla. Now, if we know anything about them, they were basically a ministry power couple in the early church, and they actually mentored a guy whose name is Apollos. Now, Apollos was someone who was a minister already. He was already preaching. He was already doing whatever. But what does the Bible says? It says that when Aquilla and Priscilla heard him, they took him aside and explained to him the way of God, more accurately. So, yeah, he did have some gifts.

[B]

Yeah. He was able to be fine, too.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So you see the power of mentorship coming here. And then shortly after this, I don't have the full scripture, but it says that then he.

[B]

He.

[A]

Something shifted in his ministry. Something shifted in his ministry. And he began to minister based off the fact that he now had Aquila and Priscilla, who were. Who had been tilling the ground, who were there with Paul during the early church. And now the young buck comes around and he's gifted and all these things. And sometimes we. We despise some mentors that God has placed in our life because maybe we feel like we're more spiritually gifted them. We think that we can see, we think that we can move in the supernatural. And maybe these are people who don't even do any of these things.

[B]

Right, right.

[A]

And a lot of times you see it like that because God needs to bring balance to what you think is. Is your life or however. And so I. I just think it's. It's beautiful. Because mentors, they also help you to know the things of God. Right. Like you said, if there's somebody who's already been there before, why am I struggling when the path has already been.

[B]

Created out for me?

[A]

The Bible talks about, don't remove the Ancient landmarks that the fathers have set.

[B]

Yes. And I think too now we are struggling in our generation where it's like. Because times are rapidly changing and it's not the way it used to be, unfortunately, we think that we can just despise what has been done of the forefathers, their wisdom. And it's like, no, you just take the wisdom and apply it to your situation now.

[A]

Right.

[B]

It doesn't mean you just throw it away and create new wisdom. Because there's some things that time creates and you obviously don't have that time. It doesn't matter how gifted you are, how. What you do, or how about you pray? Oh, how about you read your word? There's things cloud for years.

[A]

Ancient wells.

[B]

Ancient wells.

[A]

If you know you Ancient wells, I'm telling you. But we look at the story of s. Of Samuel and the prophet Eli, we see how even Hannah understood the power of mentorship. She gave up her son from jump. Meanwhile, this is a boy that she has been begging God for. Yes, immediately she gave birth to a child. As soon as she weaned him from nursing him, she gave him to mentorship.

[B]

Not knowing if she would ever have another child again.

[A]

Not knowing, not knowing. And so she understood that. I know, I told. I told God that you, you need a prophet. I need a son. Right. And so as I give birth to this son, I'm giving you to him as a prophet. I, however, I don't have all that it takes to groom him spiritually. And it takes humility as a parent or whatever the case may be to say, hey, yeah, I can't do this. I'm shifting this. Now he enters the house of. Of Eli, who is. Who is, you know, a prophet. And Samuel's also a prophet.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Right. And so now we see Samuel hearing God for the first time.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah. And he's like, who's calling me? Somebody like Samuel, Samuel. He's like, he's running to Eli. He's like, did you call me?

[B]

Yeah. He's like, no.

[A]

And he's like, no, go back. And so it happens a couple of times. Now. Eli discerns what's going on that. Hey, boy, the next thing time you hear that, you better say, lord, here I am. What? What is it? I'm here.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It took the wisdom of Eli. If not, Samuel would have knocked his.

[B]

Head over and over like he think he's hallucinating. He will go, but imagine if Eli never said that.

[A]

He would have been turning on himself for how long trying to figure out what's going on? Am I going crazy? I'm hearing somebody calling my name. I don't know. Because he didn't have the wisdom.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Mind you, someone with the same call was able to discern quickly and say, listen.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Mentorship will shave years of mistakes off of your life, your destiny.

[B]

Yep. Absolutely.

[A]

It will save you time. It will collapse time. Because he could have stayed there, maybe even for years, hearing the same. Samuel. Samuel. Samuel. Samuel.

[B]

And the thing about it is that sometimes God will only speak. What? And you'll catch him in the next season.

[A]

Well.

[B]

And think about the time that has passed before he comes again.

[A]

God works in windows.

[B]

Oh, honey. His ways and other ways. So you will never assume that. Oh, yeah, I have tomorrow.

[A]

Yeah. Mentorship is. Is so important. And, you know, as women again, we just want to encourage you all that we. God has put so much in us.

[B]

Y.

[A]

That's one thing that you need to understand is that God is. Has put so much in you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And all of those things will not come together at once. No. And there's times where you won't even know you're right from your left. You have all these gifts. You can braid, you can cook. You can do this, you can do. You can do right. But there's something that God wants to do with all of that. And as you submit yourself to mentorship, you're submitting yourself to the process of being matured, being cooked, being processed. You know, my. My mentor always says this thing. He likes to grill, and he was like, you know, there's times where he's cooked steak, and, you know, it looks pretty on the outside, but on the inside, it's raw. It's not ready. And so what God does is he uses mentors, the power of mentorship, to ready us to make sure that we're properly cooked, to make sure that as pretty as we are on the outside, that when we slice and we see.

[B]

What'S inside the inside, that you're well.

[A]

Done, you're bona fide, you're a mature Christian, and there's. There's no reason to run from it.

[B]

There isn't.

[A]

There. There is. If you've had any bad experiences. Right. With mental. You want. You want to touch. No, no.

[B]

I was just gonna say that. And. And don't be. As much as it hurts to be abused, whether verbally, spiritually, by mentors, one, understand that that was not God's will for your life. And if God is a loving father, know that he has your best interest at heart. And so if you've had bad experiences. Take those experiences to Jesus and put it at his feet and say, God, I tried, and this is what they did to me. This wasn't my fault. This is what happened. Put it all at his feet. Release it from yourself.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

Obtain forgiveness. Release the bitterness, Release the. The offense. And then try again. Absolutely. It's okay to try again. And trust that the Lord will place the right people needed in your life and in your pathway.

[A]

Absolutely. Because people are a gift.

[B]

They are a gift.

[A]

And when we have certain situations that come in our life, what the enemy tries to do is capitalize off of the fact that we've been hurt by people. It happens. Right. Sometimes mentors don't always get it right.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And. And so we have to make allowance for that. But one thing he'll try to do is. Is paint the narrative that everybody is the same. Yeah. And I can't trust.

[B]

Right, right.

[A]

And it feeds into even our own traumas and our own insecurities. But I'm here to tell you that the gift of people is powerful.

[B]

It's powerful.

[A]

It's powerful. It's life changing.

[B]

It is.

[A]

It exposes you to dimensions of God that you may not even see. See on your own.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Right. And so I think. I think we can round up here. Is there anything that you want to say even as we leave? And then I'll have you pray, you know, for the people, for the women that are watching, or even men. But is there any closing remarks that you have about the gift of people?

[B]

When Jesus was departing earth, he said in John, and he said to the disciples, when he washed their feet, he said, now do this to each other, because the washing represents the cleanliness. And I remember, I think it was. It was Peter's feet he was washing, and he was like, no, no, you can't wash my feet. And Jesus says, if I don't wash you, you can't. Like, you can't be a part of me. And then after that, he says, do this to each other. So there's a place for counsel. There's a place of people, there's a place of correction. And so don't shy from it. And there's another thing that he says in his Word, in the same book of John, he says, I am living you with a gift, the gift of the peace of mind and heart. I believe that's in John 14. Be rest assured before you go into any situation. Do I have the peace, peace of mind and the peace of heart. If you don't take a break and Go and seek that peace from God because it's a gift, he gave it freely. And so don't step into any mentorship situation. Don't, don't step into any leadership situation because they are so called, they are so powerful, or you just feel the Holy Ghost feelings lie. Feelings lie. Today I'm happy, tomorrow I can be very upset. Sense.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

That doesn't mean that I'm a terrible person. So make sure that you're not approaching any situations with your feelings, you're not approaching any mentorships with, with just what you think is right. Make sure that it's a, is a God given ordination over your life and there's a peace of mind and heart in that. So I'll just round up in prayer.

[A]

Yes, please.

[B]

Heavenly Father, we just thank you, we thank you Lord, for the gift of people. We thank you that you, when you created man, you said, and it is very good.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

So there is a goodness that comes with people. And so, Heavenly Father, I just pray for the woman or men watching across the street, across the screen and that you would endow them with the right people in their lives, oh God. The right mentors, the right friends, the right community, the right fellowships that will build them and continue to push them in the pathway of your righteousness, of your destiny and the purpose that you have ordained over their lives. Oh God. And we cancel the voice of the enemy that is trying to push them into isolation, that is trying to bring down the value of people and the love that you have even put in man. Yes, God, we just pray, oh Lord. And we rebuke that demonic spirit in the name of Jesus. We close their ears to such thoughts in the name of Jesus. And we pray, oh Lord, that from this moment forward that their perspective will begin to change when it comes to people and they will begin to see things in the way that you want them to see. Oh Lord, we thank you, O Lord, that you are moving in the light in the kingdom of God. You are moving in the, in the, the leadership teams, you are moving in the mentorship teams, you are moving in the lives of councils that you are raising up, biblical counselors in this time, oh God. And we just thank you for it. And we just pray at the end of the day, let your kingdom come.

[A]

Yes God.

[B]

And let your will be done in the lives of men, in the lives of women, and in the lives of your kingdom. We thank you, Heavenly Father, in Jesus name that we pray. Amen.

[A]

What an amazing episode. Oh my goodness. That was so good. And I learned personally a lot. It just put a lot of things into perspective for me, and I hope it did the same for you. And if it did, I want you to, like, share, comment, and listen, send it to a friend or two that, you know, may be struggling in this area or somebody who just needed a quick reaffirmation that, yes, you're in the right. You're in the right place, you're in the right space. And until the next episode, we will see you later.

[B]

See you.

[A]

Bye.