Brittany Snow: My Husband Cheated On Me (FBF)

Summary

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Call Her Daddy Podcast Summary

Episode: Brittany Snow: My Husband Cheated On Me (FBF)

Host: Alex Cooper
Guest: Brittany Snow
Release Date: August 29, 2025

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Overview

In this raw, vulnerable, and often humorous episode, Alex Cooper welcomes actress Brittany Snow for a conversation that traverses the highs and lows of celebrity, friendship, eating disorders, body image, codependency, heartbreak, and public betrayal. Brittany opens up about her struggles with an eating disorder, her journey of self-discovery and recovery, and the fallout from her very public divorce and betrayal by her ex-husband. The conversation also highlights Brittany’s directorial debut with the film "Parachute," which draws from her own experiences.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Brittany’s Authenticity in Hollywood

• [04:41] Brittany laughs off Hollywood stereotypes, explaining she has “no chill, no cool, no tact” and is “incredibly awkward,” making her more relatable.

  “I speak without thinking. And so just like, in this podcast, I’m going to say something that I will regret.” - Brittany ([04:41])

• Alex and Brittany bond over being genuine, with Alex praising Brittany’s fun, bubbly, and approachable energy.

2. Friendship and Personal Growth

• [08:49] Brittany is described by friends as sensitive, empathetic, and passionate, often acting as the “camp counselor” in her group.
• She discusses learning to be secure being alone, growth she only recently achieved.

3. Iconic Roles and Hollywood Memories

• Pitch Perfect:

  • The cast became a real family; Brittany confirms many players mirrored their characters.
  • “[Rebel Wilson] anything that Rebel does is funny.” ([11:37])

• John Tucker Must Die:

  • The film shaped young women's attitudes toward men and trust.
  • Brittany shares a real-life story inspired by the movie: she and her ex-boyfriend's other girlfriend confronted him together after discovering his cheating ([13:59]).

4. Body Image, Childhood Rewards, and Eating Disorders

• "Parachute" and Escapism:

  • “We all have our own parachutes or things we use to avoid addressing our feelings...” - Alex ([16:21])
  • Brittany reveals she built her sense of worth from validation through achievement, a system established in childhood and in Hollywood.

• Eating Disorder Origins:

  • Parental reward system for achievements led Brittany to tie food to worthiness ([19:03]).
  • “My reward center got all mixed up… I had to redefine how food was not evil and it was also not something to be earned.” - Brittany ([19:54])

• Industry Pressures:

  • After coming out of treatment, she was told on set to lose weight despite her recovery. “[The] first day on set, they said, ‘You’re too big. We need you to lose weight.’” ([20:05])
  • Internalized it as truth, hurting her further: “I thought, they're right... now makes me want to cry.” ([21:11])

• Recovery and Hope:

  • Discusses reading a magazine article that brought hope; later, her own article served the same role for another woman ([25:20]).

• Misconceptions:

  • “It’s not about food... It’s about an obsession of trying to disassociate and not be with yourself...” ([29:07])

5. Hitting Rock Bottom & Recovery

• [26:14] Brittany describes a dark, pivotal moment depicted in her movie, where she wished for her brain to stop:

  “It’s not about the act of wanting to hurt yourself as much as you just want your brain to stop… that was the moment I said, no more.” ([26:14])

• Alex assures Brittany of the value in sharing this openly, and together they stress the importance of seeking help and not suffering alone.

6. Relationships, Codependency, and Patterns

• Dating Patterns:

  • Brittany reflects that she dated men who filled perceived gaps from her childhood: “I went for a type of guy that made the things that I thought I was lacking make sense.” ([33:55])

• Codependency:

  • Her film is inspired by a real-life codependent relationship; Brittany discusses how childhood history and unmet needs play out in adult partnerships ([34:59]).
  • “I got addicted to someone saving me a little bit. And I thought that that was love.” ([35:53])

7. Divorce, Betrayal, and Public Humiliation

• The Public Divorce:

  • Brittany explains the pain of her ex-husband’s cheating playing out in the public eye, only discovering the truth after it aired ([42:05]).
  • Calmly, she states: “What people think happened, happened… They messed up.” ([42:25])
  • The hardest part was trusting herself again: “I didn’t see any of it… To trust yourself after that… I had instincts and I think because I was in love, I didn’t trust them.” ([44:25])

• Grace Over Anger:

  • Brittany chose not to engage in public feuding: “I was not going to play that game… I don’t have the anger that… people wanted me to have.” ([45:55])

• Healing and Advice:

  • She highlights the importance of friends who “just let me be” instead of trying to fix things ([53:31]).
  • Shares the need to see the other person clearly and not to idealize past relationships: “…if it did [work], it wouldn’t have happened.” ([50:23])

• Looking Back With Perspective:

  • Brittany is grateful for the clarity the betrayal provided, calling it a “neon sign” that the relationship wasn’t right ([52:06]).

8. Self-Discovery and Future Confidence

• Proudly discusses sitting with pain and embracing impermanence (“it passes… and then you just realize, oh, it... comes and goes.” - [54:30])
• Reaffirmed belief in putting herself out there and retaining hope for love and partnership, but on healthier terms ([68:38-71:23]).

9. What She’ll Never Tolerate Again

• Brittany won’t date men who try to “fix” her, judge her for sweatpants, or show only potential vs. real effort ([57:30], [60:54]).
• Emphasizes the importance of gathering real evidence vs. projecting onto partners, and being honest with herself.

10. On Love, Dating, and Fighting

• Brittany values fun, passion, partnership, and deep conversation in relationships ([73:01]).
• Disagrees with “if you don’t fight, you’re healthy”—says real relationships need conflict, intimacy, and honest communication ([74:17]).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Brittany on validation and childhood:

  “Reward system got all mixed up… I had to redefine how food was not evil and it was also not something to be earned.”
  – [19:54]

• On Hollywood pressures:

  “First day on set, they said, ‘You’re too big. We need you to lose weight.’”
  – [20:05]

• On recovery:

  “I have this really cool new voice in my head that I’m like, hey, girl, where you been?”
  – [30:55]

• On codependency:

  “I got addicted to someone saving me a little bit. And I thought that that was love.”
  – [35:53]

• On betrayal:

  “I was not aware of a lot of things… what people think happened, happened.”
  – [42:25]

• On healing:

  “The shock and the nervous system… your home is burnt. A huge part of changing and growing is just sitting in that pain and not trying to fix it…”
  – [50:23, 53:31]

• On self-worth post-divorce:

  “It was a neon fudgeing sign… I didn’t ever have to worry if I’m… [doubting myself]”
  – [52:06]

• On relationship red flags:

  “I had an ex tell me I couldn’t wear sweatpants… ‘they signified giving up.’”
  – [57:30]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Brittany’s awkwardness and approachability: [04:41]
• Friendship role & learning to be alone: [08:49-09:25]
• Pitch Perfect and cast dynamics: [10:49-12:04]
• John Tucker Must Die/Real-life confrontation: [12:56-13:59]
• Body image and eating disorder origins: [16:21-21:34]
• Pressures in Hollywood and self-worth: [20:05-21:34]
• Hope and helping others: [25:20]
• Rock bottom and recovery journey: [26:14-30:55]
• Codependency explained: [34:59-36:44]
• Discovery of husband’s cheating/public betrayal: [42:05-44:55]
• Audience advice on healing after betrayal: [50:23-54:30]
• What Brittany won’t tolerate in relationships: [57:30-60:54]
• Slow dating, red flags, and boundaries: [64:04-65:56]
• Open to love and remarriage: [68:38-71:23]
• Fighting is normal in healthy relationships: [74:17]

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Final Thoughts & Why See "Parachute"

Brittany closes by inviting women—and men—to see "Parachute," a movie she hopes will make people feel less alone with their pain:

“I hope it's… something that maybe sheds light on a feeling you didn’t know how to put into words.” – [77:18]

She reminds listeners that pain is impermanent, resilience is built by sitting with discomfort, and that recovery and love are always possible.

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Summary prepared for listeners seeking the core insights, emotional arcs, and actionable wisdom of this episode.

Transcript

[A]

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[A]

It is your founding father, Alex Cooper.

[C]

With Call Her Daddy.

[B]

Britney Snow. Welcome to Call Her Daddy.

[C]

I'm so excited to be here.

[B]

I am so happy we are doing this. I DM'd Brittany, like, how long ago?

[C]

A year ago. I think it was a year ago.

[B]

Well, I mean, you really made me work for it.

[C]

I remember. Well, I wasn't ready to. To be very public about anything, really.

[B]

I get it.

[C]

And so I remember opening up the DM and being like, oh, my God, Alex. And then being like, no, just. Just not gonna do that. So it was. It took a while for me to come around.

[B]

Well, I'm so happy you came around because I have been. Wow. I've been thinking about you for a year in the least creepy way.

[C]

It can be creepy.

[B]

And now you're here in my merch, and I fucking love it. You look amazing. I didn't even realize how blue your eyes are until I'm staring at you with this blue one and it is, like, fudgeing insane.

[C]

I'm going to wear it all the time.

[B]

You look great. You can keep it. You've been in the industry for over three decades. What is the most, like, un Hollywood thing about you?

[C]

That I've been in this business for three decades and I have absolutely no chill, no cool, no tact. No. I do everything wrong. I am incredibly, incredibly awkward in front of most people and I have this thing that I. I speak without thinking. And so just like, in this podcast, I'm going to say something that I will regret.

[B]

That's good for me. Though that's good for me, not for you. No, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

[C]

No, no, it's gonna be great. It's great for everyone because I think people instantly feel like, oh, this girl is an idiot. So I feel so much better about myself and most people like that I meet that are fancy and stuff like that, I think they feel better that someone is bumbling and is somehow invited to the party.

[B]

But I think it makes you more likable because I feel like everyone in Hollywood has like a couple sticks up their butthole and you're just kind of like, oh, no, I'm just gonna be like myself. And like, even if you think I'm wild and insane, like, it's okay. Like, I'm right here.

[C]

Wild, I'll take not insane.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Britney Snow, she's like, woo, Crazy party girl. No, but yeah, I think after a while there was no going around it. There was no way that I could be anything else. So I might as well just lean into it a little bit because it was so much more painful for me to try to be stoic and classy and try to be, you know, I guess with the stick. Yeah, I don't even know where you get the stick, but I couldn't find one and so it just, it never went up there.

[B]

I am going to say, I think I didn't know you were like this fun and bubbly. Like, I know not to say I didn't think you were gonna like, I'm like, oh, you're gonna be a weirdo. I just, I genuinely thought like, you are like a very, like, prestigious actress. You're, you know, you are like, you've been in everything.

[C]

The pacifier with Vin Diesel, that's the.

[B]

One that really sealed the deal. Okay, but like, I didn't know what to expect. And you, I'm sitting across from you and I said it before we started filming. Like, I feel like you're my friend from like childhood. That you're just like a very. You have a great energy.

[C]

Thanks. I need this pump up before I start every interview.

[B]

You're amazing. Queen Slay, let's go.

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[B]

How would your friends describe you?

[C]

I think the first word they would, they would probably say is sensitive, empathetic and probably passionate. There's no way that anybody can guess what I'm like, what I'm thinking. You know, I'm, it's always on my, on my heart is on my sleeve, shoulder, whatever. It's out there. And I think that people either love that or hate that about me because I, I'll always say what's on my mind a little bit because I'm just too sensitive not to.

[B]

I love that. I appreciate that. What role do you think you play in your friend group?

[C]

I'm a little bit of the camp counselor in a way where I'm like, everyone together, we're going out to dinner and we're gonna like it and we're all gonna wear these cute outfits and everyone's like, you know, stop. We have jobs and husbands and, and you don't. And, and I, I think, and also I am definitely the one that probably I, I need the most Connection, I guess I'm constantly in connection with my best friends. I want to. I want to hang out all the time. But lately, I think in the past year, I've gotten really good at being alone, which has not been my MO at all. Instead of being anxious about being alone, I'm actually very, very secure in it, which is nice.

[B]

That's growth, and that is the best feeling when you can get to that point. So I'm really happy for you.

[C]

But I love being around my friends and doing activities.

[B]

You're like, answer my text, bitch. Like, where the fuck have you guys been? Let's go to dinner tonight. Okay. Let's talk about a couple of the movies that you've starred in that are so iconic. And then we're going to get to a new film. But first, Pitch Perfect. Obviously, I have to ask about it. It is, like, forever. Just the best, best, best movie series. Can you talk to me? Obviously, you had some of the funniest people on set with you. Is there any, like, incredible, hilarious memory that you have from that movie that just comes to your mind when you can, like, tell us a little story?

[C]

I mean, all those girls are some of my best friends in some way. We also became such a family because when you're doing a movie with so much rehearsal time and then you also have to shoot after that, you're there wherever our location was for about four to five months, and we became really, really close. And all of us are very somewhat similar to our characters in different ways. I won't give away how, because that's blowing some of them up, but. But I think that we all feel very connected to our roles in that group and how it's showcased in the movies. So I guess to answer your question about funny moments, I mean, anything that Rebel does is funny.

[B]

When I interviewed her and she was doing an impression of Adam Devine, I was like, I think I actually, for the first time, just physically peed my pants in the middle of an interview. Her doing the impression of him. And then I interviewed Adam and he tried to imitate Rebel, and that was a fucking disaster. Sorry, Adam. But like. And the two of their dynamic, it is like, you could just watch it forever. It's hilarious.

[C]

And I think that that was the cool thing about all of our dynamics on the movie is that we did constantly. We got along so well, but we constantly made fun of each other, which was sort of a camaraderie that we needed because we going into those movies, we had no idea that they were going to become what they became. So we had a lot of fun, poking fun at the fact that, like, are we really making this type of movie?

[B]

Right?

[C]

And are people gonna like it?

[B]

I bet it didn't even sometimes feel like work because you're like, we're just like, half the time, I'm sure there's some people improvising and it's just like, fun. So John Tucker Must Die. I this movie, I feel like we just have to. I don't know who hasn't seen it, but to anyone that hasn't seen it, first of all, I think this changed my life, it really formed me as a woman, I remember being young and being like, never trust man. Which I'm like, I learned so much from that movie, if you can describe to people who haven't somehow watched it because they live under rock, can you describe, like, the premise of it?

[C]

Sure. So John Tucker must die, which is hilarious because he doesn't die, we don't kill him. So anyone who wants to know if it's a horror or something or a thriller in any way, it's just about this guy who is the high school man, and he's dating a bunch of girls at the same time as you do in high school, not anymore. And. And all of us are in different cliques. Well, I'm not. Why did I just put myself in there? I'm not in the clicks, I'm not dating him, all of them are in different cliques and they all somehow get together by circumstance and find out that they're all dating him at the same time, so then I devise a plan for them all to get back at him and teach him a lesson.

[B]

It is like, no, because honestly, it's like something I would have done in high school, like, this is literally me, I think that's probably why I connected with it, I'm like, would be like the mastermind that's like, listen to me, this is how we're taking this man down, this is how we're going to kill him. Okay, figurative me, not literally. What is the pettiest thing you or a friend has done to get back at a guy that you've broken up with?

[C]

Well, to be, to be completely fair, and this is, this sounds so lame, okay, Because I had just done John Tucker Must Die, and while I was shooting that movie, my boyfriend at the time, who was the first love of mine and I, and I still have such fond memories for him, but at the time we were on like a break, Ross Rachel vibe, and he was dating this other Girl and I found out about it, and so me and her, right after John Tucker must die because I don't have any good ideas of my own. Show up at his house together.

[B]

No.

[C]

Yeah. And he opens the door and I remember saying to him, I think you owe us an extra explanation or something like that.

[B]

You really took your character too far. Yeah, you were like, let me, like, really, like, method act right now, and like, let me just like, get into character. Here we go. Oh, my God. What did he. What was his reaction?

[C]

I remember him being shocked, but. But it didn't really help or work or anything. And then I remember saying bye to her and being like, that was weird, right? Like, why did we do that?

[B]

Like, what was the plan? Like, what did you want him to say?

[C]

What, after it was going to happen?

[B]

Like, what was the goal? Honestly, when you are, like, young and in love, you do some crazy.

[C]

Oh, yeah, There were, there were things that I definitely did, even up to the, probably the point where I was, I think 27 is when I. I got my together a little bit. But until then, I look back and I am traumatized.

[B]

Yeah, that's actually a really good age, I would say. I feel like at 27, I really started to, like, refine my craft, you know, like just tweak it a little bit so that if someone told the story of me, it wasn't giving. She's crazy. It was giving, you know, she's passionate.

[C]

Passionate.

[B]

But it's not level of crazy that.

[C]

I used to be unhinged. Comes before 27.

[B]

Yes. Not after, not after anyone that's 28 right now losing their shit, stalking their ass. Just keep going. Like, maybe put your benchmark at 30. You're going to be fine. Now onto your new movie. This is the first movie that you have written and directed called Parachute.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

First of all, just congratulations. Thank you. That is so incredible, as someone that's been in the industry to take this leap and also just, I love it, like, as a woman, like, showing people, like, you can do everything, you can be in front of the camera, you can be behind the camera, so congratulations.

[C]

Thanks.

[B]

You've said that we all have our own parachutes or things we use to avoid addressing our feelings or confronting difficult situations in your own life. What hardships have you tried to run from?

[C]

Okay, let's.

[B]

Here we go, baby, Here we go.

[C]

Well, I think, you know, my, my naming of the movie, it being Parachute, is that I really do think we're all trying to lessen the fall. As cheesy as that sounds less. In the fall of just being with ourselves and feeling our feelings. I think now more than ever, it's. We go on Instagram or we go on TikTok or whatever, and we scroll to numb the pain of just being with our own feelings, or we're trying to. To hit a dopamine, sort of like, hit in a way to make us sort of ride the wave to the next moment. And I think that comes in all sorts of facets, but I think that they're very intertwined and can be subbed out for each other with social media, sex, alcohol, all these different ways that we're trying to lessen being with ourselves. And I think for me, I came from being a child actor that was very based in growing up with validation coming from achievement and coming from. You did really well on this. You get a reward not only from my parents, but from just people on set or things in general. And so I started to become really addicted and. And connected to the feeling of needing to get that hit. And when I wasn't, I didn't feel like myself. And so I think probably I would have been addicted to something. It just so happened that I went on a diet before someone gave me drugs. I never had a problem with drugs, but I think if someone would have given me drugs, it just, one is the one is the before the other. And so I think what I was always trying to run from was the just normalcy of just being.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And not having to achieve anything.

[B]

You're so right. How many things we do to distract ourselves from being able to sit in silence and be okay with, like, what's going on? Why are you sad? What happened in your childhood? Why are you like that? And everyone's like, no, quick social media, oh, my God, let me watch this YouTube video. Oh, my God, let me watch this person. And, like, it's just. It's never ending. The main character in the movie deals with body dysmorphia and eating disorder. And I, like, you, just kind of opened up about, like, I know you've struggled with that in the past. That's why you wrote this movie. When you were younger, how would you describe your relationship to food?

[C]

It was very based on connection to achievement, which is a weird thing to say, I guess, but I got a milkshake if I did well on an audition, and I wouldn't get a milkshake if I didn't do well. And I think a lot of parents do this. This unknowingly in terms of you do well in your Soccer game, we go out for, you know, cheeseburgers, or if you lost, like, we need to go practice more. And so I think my reward center got all mixed up. Then couple that with the terrible amount of, you know, societal norms of how you look at yourself being a woman. I think that was sort of like a culmination. That that was hard. And I think I had to redefine how food was not evil and it was also not something to be earned.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because, like, I'm curious, did you have.

[B]

Anyone in the industry ever make comments about your body or was this a, like, very personal, internal thing you were struggling with?

[C]

There was a movie that I. I had just gotten help. I'm very young at this point, but I had just gotten help and I gained a bunch of weight during that time. And it was. It was half because I was healthy and half because I didn't know how to balance. And I think a huge part of my recovery has been balance. But I got on set. The first day on set, they said, you're too big. We need you to lose weight. And so I went on. They put me on a diet, they got me a nutritionist, they got me a trainer. And the other people in the movie got to go to set normal hours, but I had to work with a trainer at, like, 5 o' clock in the morning. And it sort of set up this belief system, I think, that it doesn't really matter if you're healthy. This is a long time ago. It doesn't really matter if you're healthy. It matters what they're gonna see.

[B]

But do you remember, like, sitting in that room when you had just gone through recovery? You're, like, feeling better about yourself, and then you sit down and they say that to you. Like, what did you feel when they immediately said that to you? Do you remember?

[C]

Yes. This is how fucked up it was. I thought, they're right. Yeah. Which now makes me want to cry, because I think there's no way that that was correct. But I think I'm so hard on myself, and I wanted to be great and sexy and beautiful that I thought, okay, this is a goal for me to. To get right.

[B]

It's also just so sad as women. Like, you can do so much work, but it's like we're fighting against a system that is conditioned us since the beginning days to, like, believe. Like, there is this one body standard that is you will get treated differently. You will get different jobs if you look this way. Like, if you're thin, you get XYZ and So, like, as much work as you can do on yourself and, like you said, feel healthy. The minute someone looks at you and makes a comment, especially to a woman about her body, it is so hard for us to not immediately internalize it and be like, I gotta get skinnier. Like, it's. You can do so much work, but it's. It's also just so up how people feel so comfortable to even say that. But at the end of the day, it's like, oh, yeah, they think they know they're gonna make more money if you look a certain way. And so it's just like.

[C]

It's a societal thing. It's. It's in. It's in the workplace. It's in every sort of. It's on social media. To. To be honest, the most is that this is the norm and that we need to adhere to the norm. But what it. The norm is ever changing and so different person to person. So true.

[B]

So, I don't know, when you look back, I'm curious, like, do you remember a specific moment where you realized that your relationship to food was different than your friends around you?

[C]

Definitely, because I remember thinking. I remember thinking that I was obsessing about something that other people could kind of take or leave. And as a. As a teenager, it became such a. An obsession, which now I really understand. The obsession of that was a way to leave my body. So I wasn't even connecting to this thing I thought I was solving. I was actually dissolved, associating. I was. I was becoming obsessed with something that was sort of this goal over here. And I think a lot of addicts in general become connected to the obsessing more than they become. I mean, that's a generality that. I don't know. You know, I'm not a doctor, but. But I do think that that's a part of it. And so when I was a teenager, I would collect magazines and, you know, fitness magazines and all these different things to try to get there. And my friends would look at them and think, Leonardo DiCaprio is not in this magazine. Like, why are we reading this?

[B]

Like, brittany, where is Brad Pitt?

[C]

Yeah, we get the fallout of Leo to go up on the wall.

[B]

And you're like, no, look at this woman. Yeah, yeah, got it.

[C]

And I think that was the first time I was like, oh, why am I so into this? What is this gonna solve for me? But I think. I think it was useful in a way. And I. I talk about this with my charity September letters. There was an article in. In a Magazine, in a fitness magazine in Inter, mixed with all of the do this in Pilates and eat this. There was a story about a girl with an eating disorder and she was sort of explaining her OCD with the obsession of it. And I ripped out that magazine article and I thought, this girl has what I have. She's doing the same thing. So I put it in my back pocket and I wanted to keep it as a, as a way of hope that there was something in someone out there that had the same thing that I did. And then later it kind of came full circle because I did a magazine article for People and I shared my story and I talked about how I found that magazine article. And there was a girl at a coffee shop who was behind me and she started crying and I turned around and she pulled out my magazine article from her back pocket. And she was like, I carry this around as something, as a, as an example of hope that I'm. That I can get better. And I was like, okay, well, I did it.

[B]

Like you maybe not did it, but.

[C]

You know, it mattered. Those, of course.

[B]

No, like you did something that ended up how you felt about the magazine that you first saw, it ended, you ended up doing the same exact thing to affect another woman, which I think is so beautiful. And it's so sad because I do believe there is good in social media, in us doing this. Like, I can't imagine so many people are going to listen to this and so many women are going to be like, oh my God, I needed this episode. I've been doing this. I like, I think there's so much positivity that can come, but unfortunately I do think there's more negativity because of how oversaturated and over comfortable. I feel like people have gotten on the Internet to just like sling out. That's just like, we're not thinking before we post, right. And I think it's really harmful. What was your, like, rock bottom moment where you realize, like, I need to get help?

[C]

I. Well, it's in Parachute. It's what, it's what Parachute is about the movie. And although it became many people's stories in this way, there was a moment that I. I mean, people are going to see the movie, so I guess I should get comfortable talking about it, but I thought that it would be better. This is a lot for Call her Daddy. This is trigger warning all the way, you know, to hell. But what I tried to encapsulate with the images in it as well is that I don't even think Sometimes it's. It's about the. The act of wanting to. To hurt yourself as much as you just want your brain to stop. And I just wanted my brain to stop. And so I think that at that moment, there was a. There was a thing that happened in my brain that said, yeah, but it'll be okay if you're skinny. And that was the moment I said, no more. No more. Is that going to be the thing that solves anything anymore? But this is. This is not just me. I would be hard pressed to find many people who have been through something like this that haven't had a moment like that or felt like that was an answer, and it's not. And there are so many people that have gotten through it. And I. I sound like I'm being really dramatic, and I'm hoping that I'm not, but I think that hopefully I can be an example that it does get better.

[B]

I hope I can, like, ease your mind for a minute right now. Like, first of all, this is not too dramatic or heavy for Call Her Daddy. This is, like, the exact place we should have this conversation because of how many women listen to this podcast and how many women look up to you and you have a voice and you do have a platform and you're so talented and to put your experiences into a movie that so many people are going to be able to watch and connect to, like, full stop. This is not dramatic. This is real life. And you experience this.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And also, I think it's so incredible to talk about this. So someone watching this is going to be where you were how many years ago and be like, wait, maybe tonight I don't have to harm myself. Maybe I should go to someone and ask for help. That's what this is about, right?

[C]

I think so. And I think that's what. I guess people keep asking me, why did I do the movie? Why did I make the movie? And I think because I didn't have a movie like that when I was going through it. And I didn't even think what I was doing was necessarily. I. I thought I was very alone in. In it. So if that helps, if this helps, people really look up to you. And so I just hope that, yeah, there is some. Not that I'm some martyr either. Like, I don't have all the answers and I don't have a guidebook, but I definitely know that it's possible.

[B]

What do you think is the biggest misconception people have about eating disorders and body dysmorphia and body image issues that.

[C]

It'S self indulgent or vain or about the food. It's not about food. It's not about how you look. I mean, topically maybe, but I think underneath it's. It's really about an obsession of trying to disassociate and not be with yourself, with. With actually like in your body. It's better to just kind of obsess about something else and the achievement and the dopamine hit you get by losing weight or, or something like that. That's so much more of the, of the intricacy than it is about just not eating.

[B]

That's what is frustrating. It's like when people. You're so right. Think it's vain. Whatever it is, it's all a control mechanism like you're saying, because you have a lack of control in your life and inside of you where you're trying to dissociate. So it's the one thing that you're like, I can handle this here and you don't have to think about what's going on upstairs. Like you said, this movie is about talking about these distractions. Sure. To some people it's food. To other people, like you said, it's sex, it's alcohol, it's drugs. It's hurting ourselves in some capacity to not feel what we're actually going through.

[C]

Or even like lesser known ones, like gossiping or just being about drama or just being the person that's in everyone's business. I mean, you're sort of doing these emotionally unavailable things because you can't just sit with yourself. So it's better to go over here, go over here. And I think that a lot of people get that misconstrued because they think, oh, eating disorders are one thing, alcoholism is one thing. And they're really quite similar. They're just using a different mechanism.

[B]

When I mentioned, like, obviously recovery is not just this, like, clear path, like, where are you at in your journey?

[C]

I mean, I'm better than I ever have been, which I think is such a marking of how I was able to do this movie and write about myself and have this conversation. I think I have a lot of perspective and I'm a lot able. More able to sit with myself. And I have this really cool new voice in my head that I'm like, hey, girl, where you been? That that started, you know, I think probably 10 years ago that I pretty much always see the different perspective and things, which is huge. Something terrible will happen and another voice in my head will come in and be like, well, let's think about this from another perspective. You know, maybe it wasn't that. It was this. I don't really have black and white thinking anymore. I have very gray thinking, which is such a huge marking of a good recovery, I think. And not in like a Pollyanna way either. I just kind of see the good in things a lot.

[B]

It's amazing. How did your relationship with your body impact how you approached sex in your life?

[C]

That is a great question. And so layered because I think in my earlier years it was difficult to be in my body. And I bless my ex boyfriends when I was in my early 20s, before recovery, truly bless them because it was really hard for me to understand sex in the way that was healthy because I had to actually be in my body and I was letting people see me and that was really hard for me. And then more and more, and especially now I have so much recovery and autonomy and like confidence in my body now that I've never had before. I mean, I was naked in X, so if that says anything.

[B]

Right. But that's like a huge step, I feel like probably for you. Right.

[C]

That's why I took it. To be honest. I was scared shitless. But I think it was such a, such a goal for me, and I hate to use the word goal since I've, I've dragged that through the mud this whole podcast. But, but, but I. What I wanted to do was be able to have that sort of confidence of playing a character that was brazen in her body and, and bold and it not get into my head. Yeah. And that. And yeah, it was, it was really about balance. Yes.

[B]

You did it.

[C]

I did it.

[B]

What kind of guys, growing up and during this time of your life, like, were you going after. Who were you pursuing? Britney? What were you up to over there?

[C]

Have you seen a side by side of all my exes? Because I have.

[B]

I have too. Why don't you explain it to people that have it?

[C]

Well, you can go on Google. And I definitely had a type. God bless me, Brittany, from when you were young. I think, you know, I've had a lot of therapy.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

And I think that I, I was going after people that sort of made sense in my mind and, and that were lovely and, and very kind to me. And I've never dated anybody who was like an asshole, which, which I know seems weird when you look at my dating history, but, but they weren't, they were all lovely. But I think I went for a type of guy that made my. The things that I thought I Was lacking. Make sense, if that makes sense.

[B]

So trying to, like, almost fill the gaps of where you were. Like, I'm not feeling great about this, but they bring this to my life, so they feel that for me.

[C]

Exactly.

[B]

But when we get into therapy, as we know, Brittany, it's like, no, you've got to be whole on your own, because then you'll pick a complete different partner completely. No one will have to fill any gaps. They can be an individual, you can be an individual. You just come together.

[C]

Exactly.

[B]

Okay. Fascinating. I know a huge theme also in this movie is codependent relationships. Have you ever been in one?

[C]

Well, it's about. The movie is about what really happened. I got into a codependent relationship with a guy who is still a friend of mine. And I think it was. I think all relationships, especially before therapy, are sort of these microcosms of what you dealt with in childhood, because it feels like home. And so it feels like, oh, that thing that I was missing from my mom or dad, I'm going to somehow recreate in a relationship. And I know I'm not talking about anything that people don't know, but I do think it's really interesting with codependency, because I never had someone really unconditionally take care of me in that way. And so I got addicted to someone saving me a little bit. And I thought that that was love.

[B]

Can you talk about that like your childhood? What do you mean? You weren't taken care of?

[C]

I think I love my parents and my. And I won't even talk ill about them at all, but I think that it. And a lot of parents were like this in this generation, too. It was very conditional. It was very. I got, you know, an anxious attachment style for good reason, because I. I got a reward system, like I was saying.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So I think that when I had someone who was just like, anything you do is great, and I'm going to be there for you no matter what.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

If you fail, if you win, I mean, it was just like gold.

[B]

Right?

[C]

You're like, whoa, Yeah.

[B]

I don't, like, have to do this. And then if I don't do this, I, like, get punished or I don't get attention or I don't. Wow. That is interesting.

[C]

But then I started to. It's. It started become becoming very evident that. That it became codependent in a way of. Of being addicted to that savior saved cycle. And I think that was the relationship that got me into recovery.

[B]

Yeah. Because I. While you're saying that I'm thinking about it, like, it's so hard to spot. But then when you're in a codependent relationship, like, all of a sudden you do eventually, I feel like most people get to that point where, like, you feel like you've been saved. The person's there, and there's still this void, and you're still like, wait, what? Like, why am I not fulfilled? Why am I not happy? It's like, because a partner can actually not solve what you're lacking and what you're missing. You have to solve that. And so it's a band aid. It feels good for a minute. Like, you said they would come in, you're like, huh, this is good. But really, it's just, they're like covering the tracks of what your parents didn't give you. And then once they do that, then you're feeling cozy. And then you're like, wait, but I still am feeling kind of like on these days. And then you realize, like, it actually has nothing to do with the person across from you. Of course a partner can influence how you feel about yourself. But when you're looking for someone to fill the gaps, once the gaps are all filled, then it's like, why do I still feel empty in moments?

[C]

Yeah, I. And no person can. They're all just gonna bring out these things in you that. That you need to go and look at for yourself.

[B]

Well, I do have to ask you. Okay, first of all, here we go.

[C]

Let's do it.

[B]

Here we go. Let's go. Well, first of all, are you single?

[A]

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[B]

First of all, are you single?

[C]

Yes, I am. I am. I am.

[B]

Wait, that was kind of like, I am. You are.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

But are you, like, talking to people? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because if you were like, single single, you'd be like, absolutely. I saw a little like. Yeah. So you're, you're, you're dating.

[C]

Yeah, I've been. I've been. Let's use air quotes here. Yes, Single. Weirdly. I'm not saying weirdly like it's so weird for me to be single. I'm saying weirdly because it's, it's very easy for me to get in a relationship.

[B]

Got it.

[C]

And I've been actively trying to be alone and be with myself and just feel the feelings and not have to band aid it with sparkly, shiny, you know, emotional thing.

[B]

Totally.

[C]

And so, yeah, I've not, I've been in and out of things a little bit, but nothing concretely. And so until, you know, we'll see.

[B]

Okay. So last year, yeah. You went through a very public divorce with your ex. Your ex husband went on a reality show and there was a situation with another woman that Just played out. And you had no idea it was happening until it aired for the world. What did you feel when you saw this play out for the world to see?

[C]

I will preface this with they've taken up. And I. And I'm collectively calling them all they. Because I don't know any of them except my ex husband. They took up a lot of energy and emotion and time and real estate in my head. And I don't want to give them any more time and energy because then they would win and they would get what they wanted, which was getting my time and energy and attention. I was not aware of a lot of things, and I'll say that. So I will say what people think happened happened. And I think that there's also, in my experience with this and how I've processed it, there's a lot of grace that I give myself and also I can own. There's a part of this that I'm not. I don't have a part in. They messed up. But. But I. I'm trying. I tried. I tried very hard to see it all from every side and. And release that anger because it doesn't serve me.

[B]

At some point when you're moving on from something, it's like you don't want to give things air. I think as a woman watching it, I got triggered because like, I have had a. Not exact same similar situation, but like, I've seen things online of someone I was dating in the past and I was like, sorry, what? And it warps your perception of like, how can you trust people? Like, it's such a.

[C]

Or how can you trust yourself?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Which I think was. I think the saddest part about the whole thing was I was. I didn't. I didn't see any of. I was what? Like. And to trust yourself after that and be like, I have a. I have a good sense of character. There was some. I had instincts and I think because I was in love, I didn't trust them.

[B]

Yeah, that's what I feel like. Which is the worst is when you get a little space from it. We kind of always know, but like, there's so many reasons we don't want to know. Because it looks all good and most of it feels good, but there's like a tiny thing in your head that's like. And you're like, no, get out of here. Like, everything is good. Like we are thriving over here, but it's not. And I guess like I just now like thinking you're fabulous and getting to know you. I can't help but just ask, like, how do you. How I feel like, you're kind of.

[C]

A private person, specifically with my relationships. A hundred percent.

[B]

Yeah. So how do you, how did you just like, handle, like, him and then all them for a minute, like, how do you handle internally, people coming at you and wanting to know something so personal that like, this person betrayed you. Like, they took it so public and you didn't have a say in it. Like, how did you recover from that? Like, and how are you recovering from it?

[C]

I think that was the hardest part was the not being able to not be. Not because anyone silenced me, just that I was not going to play that game. I don't have the anger that I think that I, I think people wanted me to have in terms of, like, I wasn't. It was so, like, what. I just didn't even want to go there, you know.

[B]

I get what you mean. You're like, I know people want you to put out this big statement, like, I saw it. And you're like the.

[C]

Yeah, I, I, of course I saw it.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You know.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Watched it with my dog. So.

[A]

By yourself.

[C]

Whatever. I. It's like, now I can laugh about it because I think it's so.

[B]

I think it's insane.

[C]

It's insane and it's so funny. Like, it's so crazy.

[B]

Is there anything like closing out that chapter of your life that you feel like was like, very misconstrued on the Internet like, that you could clarify right now?

[C]

I think I would say that, yes. What happened, happened. And I think what people, you know, what it's alluded to in the press is some is true. But what I do think, you know, which the press can't do, thankfully, is the intricacies of. There was love there. There was a. There was a marriage there. There was, There was so much love. And, and I think that that gray is hard to understand because it's much more salacious and interesting that it's just like he did this and she did this and. And I think that's what I would want to, I guess put out there is that I think a lot of people go into relationships where someone hurts them, but. But I don't regret it. I don't regret anything that happened because I loved that time that we had when we had it.

[B]

Yeah. Did you know her?

[C]

Which one?

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Any of them?

[C]

No.

[B]

You had no clue. And then it slowly just bomb.

[C]

I did not, I did not know, like, what was going on. I think as someone who's so hands on with My career. I think I was just completely shocked that I didn't have a handle on reality in that way. Like, that was shocking.

[B]

Who did you call first?

[C]

I went over to a friend's house. It was. It was. It was the worst day.

[B]

It's more the situation that's, like, so relatable for women when it happens. And it's like you feel like you've been hit by a truck because your reality has been completely distorted, because you're like, everything I believed is changed, and you have to basically pick the pieces up by yourself. And it's a really, really up situation. If anyone is listening has felt it. You know what I mean? Of like, you want to say you to the person, but you're also like, wait, five seconds ago, you were my person. How does it change? On a dime? It does. And so, like, the picking up of the pieces by yourself when 48 hours ago you had this person and a life together. It's really disorienting. But I feel like if you have any, like, closing advice for women right now, generally, of just like, when you experience someone betraying your trust and disrespecting you in a relationship, like, what have you found has given you strength to move forward and trust yourself after something like that has happened to you?

[C]

It doesn't happen right away because I think the. The shock and the nervous system that. And the breakdown of the. The familial sort of system of safety is destroyed because this person is your home and your home is burnt. So I think what happened for me, which is, you know, and I won't speak about this specifically, because I think this goes with a lot of my past relationships or things that I tell my friends, which is to actually start realizing and seeing them as real people and not this idealized version of what you thought or what you built, but who they are really, and the intricacies of. Of taking the shine off a little bit and really getting into the brass tacks of, like, did this really work? Because if it did, it wouldn't have happened. And. And that's really hard to hear because I think a lot of us want to be like, it's. It's them and blah, blah, blah, but, like, it is. But I think that there's nuance in the fact that they must not be happy.

[B]

It's so true. And, like, you're so right, Brittany. It's like, I know it's so hard to hear, especially if there's someone like, today you found out and you're like, oh, my God, what do I do? There is something to be said of having enough, like, respect for yourself to know, if this person did this to me, why would I want to be.

[A]

With someone that could ever disrespect me?

[C]

And that's. That is that. That has been such a gift for me. People keep telling me, like, what did you feel afterwards? And I'm like, grateful in a weird way because it was a neon fudgeing sign. It was like, bigger than this.

[B]

You're like. And double.

[C]

Yeah, triple. So I didn't ever have to worry if I'm. Yeah.

[B]

You know, yeah, like, like, you'll never doubt. You'll never doubt. Like, that wasn't meant to be. And that's what I think. Leaving that conversation, it is helpful for women to hear, like, someone that has just recently gone through something that like, is unfortunately really relatable. And we all go through it probably at some point in your lifetime, if you haven't you, you're lucky. It is like staying really, really clear on who the you are and what you deserve and not allowing yourself in the wake of the loss in the first couple months to romanticize something like being grounded of like, no, no, hold on. Listen to what this person did to you. Like, this person is like, you know what I mean? Like, you just have to kind of. You're right, be realistic and you can cry. Like, I feel like sometimes people are like, get over it. Like, make sure you surround yourself with friends that are like, cry snot in the tissue. Like, you should be sad because you're mourning something that you didn't have control over the ending of. But like, then move the on.

[C]

I, I really, really shout out and give such thanks to my friends who just laid there with me and they didn't try to fix it and they didn't try to because there's nothing to fix, there's nothing to change. It is what it is. And they just like, let me just be. And that's what I needed at that time. And you know, I listened to a lot of Woo Woo self help podcast, but a huge part of, of changing and growing is what I think is just like sitting in that pain and not trying to fix it in trying to and just, I don't know, it makes resilience possible.

[B]

I do want to know though, with divorce because I do think women, there's such a stigma of like, oh God, you gotta start over. And like, how are you gonna do that? And men have it so much easier. And it's such like, what have you learned about yourself through this divorce.

[C]

Oof. So much. And honestly, I'm not this type of girl, so I will preface that with. With that blanketed statement, But I'm so proud of myself. And I'm. I'm never proud of myself, but I think that it was really, really crazy for a minute, but I think, like, anything. I just. There was this one time that I texted a girl from Pitch Perfect, one of the. One of the Bellas, and I said, what do you do in this situation? How are you handling. How did you handle this emotion? Because it's so. It's so much pain that I didn't know if I could do it. And she. She just said, you just sit there. You just sit there and you just take it, and you just exist. Just exist. And I just remember sitting there being like, okay, I'm just gonna exist. And I just, like. And it passes, and then you just realize, oh, it. This stuff is so ephemeral in a way. Like, it's just. It. It does hurt, but it comes and goes, and I think that that sort of impermanence can be an example for so many things in life. So true.

[A]

That's like.

[B]

Again, it's the hardest thing. And it's like what we go back to when we were talking about, you know, struggling with an eating disorder, where you're like, oh, my God, if only, like, I could just get out of my head. But it's like. But it does get better if you do get help. It's. It is the same thing with everything in life. Like, there is. You're right, there is this impermanence where, like, in the moment, it feels like, oh, the ship's going down. We're like, how am I gonna get through this?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And then one day you wake up and you're like, like, huh, I feel better. Right?

[C]

And I don't know how.

[B]

Then one day, you're sitting on Caller Daddy, and I ask you if you're single, and you're like, ah, well, let me talk to you about my roster, Like. And it's like, life goes on.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Had you ever been cheated on before?

[C]

Yes. And, ooh, do I love dealing with that in therapy, girl. Because, you know, here's the thing. Fuck them for doing that.

[B]

Of course.

[C]

To be honest.

[B]

Of course.

[C]

But underneath that, I can't control that. And what, am I going to be angry for the rest of my life and draw, you know, holes in their.

[B]

Eyes like a little voodoo doll like you?

[C]

But what I can do with that is look at my part of, like, I Picked them. And maybe that was something that I should have looked at because. Because maybe I was doing something from my childhood of, like, needing that validation or that sort of conditional love and the fighting for the, like, are they gonna think I'm hot? You know, like, whatever. And it's like, I don't want to. I don't do that anymore.

[B]

What is something that you have, like, you put up with in the past that now that you've, like, become centered with yourself and you can look back at past relationships, you're like, I will never put up with this anymore.

[C]

I had an ex tell me that I couldn't wear sweatpants.

[B]

Sorry. What? He would hate me. Holy. Who is this man?

[C]

I will not tell you. But, yeah. Oh, yeah. That they. That they signified giving up. Which I love the description as well. So I'm just getting started giving up, giving up.

[B]

Relaxed, cozy, comfortable, thriving.

[C]

I was like, I can look hot in sweatpants.

[B]

You can look so fucking sexy in sweatpants. Let me be the person tell you.

[C]

So I think that guy in general, although young, young, like a young soul. And. And also we're friends now, so it's fine.

[B]

Right? Right. And you wear sweatpants every time you see them.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Oh, my friends got me a ring that is engraved sweatpants pants.

[B]

No.

[C]

Yes. Well, it's just when we broke up, because they were like, girl, where are you? Sweatpants. Yeah.

[B]

Well, it's also just so sadly indicative of, like, male female relationships where it's like, why do men feel comfortable saying that to women when it's like, we would never say, oh, don't wear. Well, I would say, don't wear your khakis. Like, but it's like, why? You know what I mean? It's such a. It's such like, a demeaning statement that you're like, what? Why?

[C]

I think he had an idea of what sexy bedtimeness was, and it didn't incorporate sweatpants. I don't know. But I think that's. That's marketing and also shitty, you know, things given to men as of. Yeah, this is what a woman is supposed to do, you know, And I think that bleeds into a lot of relationships too, is that I think men think that there's this generalization of what women should be like. Right. And I'm sure you've dealt with this a lot too, but I think a lot of times I've dealt with in relationships where, like, a guy thinks they want a boss, they think they want the girl that comes in. In a suit and Then changes into sweatpants because she's fucking tired. But they don't really sometimes because they want to provide and they want you to have dinner and all this stuff where you're like, are we in 1940? Right? And I think changing that and actually having guys pull up and be like, if you want a boss, you're going to get a boss. And she's going to wear sweatpants because she's been working all day.

[B]

Right. And she's paying for this fucking dinner in this house. So bow down. Okay, yeah. No, I appreciate that because I get we're talking about sweatpants, but it's indicative of other things. Theme is no, and I agree with you. I think there's a lot of men also goes back to pornography. Like, they see this and they're like, oh, my God. Like, this needs. It's not realistic. Every porn star I've ever talked to is like, it is the fakest thing I've ever done in my life. Like, I am faking it. This is fake. This is the. What you see is fake. What you see squirting out is fake. Like, it's all fake. And so it's like, I think men have such a warped perception of what they want women to be. They need to educate themselves and. And get up to speed. Speed. Because I'm exhausted seeing men treat women like, why aren't you acting like a Barbie doll? Like, why aren't you wearing lingerie to bed? And it's like, you put on a G string. Like, I'm done with this. Like, it's exhausting. Okay, so you've learned that. What else are you gonna take away from? Like, you're never gonna deal with. From past relationships.

[C]

I think I fall in love with. With. And this is before, not. Not anymore. But I really fell in love with people who had potential. I saw it in them. Like, let's go. Us against the world. We are a team, baby. And there wasn't evidence that that was true. Sometimes. Sometimes there was. But I think I won't put up anymore with. With just potential because it's an idea. And although I think it's different than believing in someone and their ability and their drive, because I think that's sexy. But I think that there's. There's. There's a difference.

[B]

Yeah. I feel like it gets so scary. And I've had that before. And I bet it's very relatable for women listening. Like, when you have a guy in front of you and you have all these ideas of what they can be we need to start being more accountable with ourselves. Of, like, but what is he showing you? And it's like, well, no, no, no. But, no, no. Look at what he's saying and what he's doing every day. Like, get your head out of the clouds. But it's, what? Hard. And I think that's also just coming from the standpoint of being a woman. We've been taught to just, like, make everyone comfortable and, like. And look at things. Like, I don't know. I feel like we just have moments where we try to make the best of things, and instead it's like, girl, what is he showing you? It's hard. What we're talking about is, like, us also, as women, like, just trying to get validation. It's like, all we know. It's like, did they tell you you're pretty? Did they tell you you're thin? Did they tell, like, did you do a good job? It's like, we're constantly just fighting to be validated because we already are starting from below zero as women. It's like, we aren't men. We're living in a man's world. Like, you're already at a disadvantage. So we're looking externally for all these things. And then when you start dating, it gets psychotic because you're like, do I like him, or do I just, like, really need that, like, little validation tonight at that date? Like, which is it? But eventually, it's. It's. It's exhausting. But then it's. I found once you exhaust yourself enough.

[C]

Well, I actually ended up having to, like, really start listing it out in my head. Like, I'm like, he yelled at a waiter once.

[B]

Oh, Brittany, I know.

[C]

And I was like, that wasn't the.

[B]

Like, by peace, and you can pick up the bill. Okay, goodbye. Good day, sir. Oh, my God.

[C]

Yeah. And then, like. And then I, like, snapped out of it, and I was like, whoa, whoa, where have I.

[B]

Like, but we can avoid those things, and we can pretend it didn't happen. Like, I have done that before, and this is so embarrassing, but, like, I've done something similar where, like, they do that, and then I, like, pretend I didn't see it. Like, I'm like, oh, my God. Like, where's my hair tie? Like, and it's like, I just saw this man be rude to a waiter. But you don't want to see it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Because you have. You have an agenda in your head, and that didn't fit the script. I'm like, no, no. Like, I want to go out with you again. Because what you're feeling this one thing that I'm liking right now. So, like, that waiter issue never happened. But then eventually, you look at yourself in a couple months, still talking to him, and he's, like, doing it now to you, and he's doing. And you're like, okay, well, I saw this, like, fucking five months ago, but here.

[C]

But I was listening to your episode with Camila Cabello, and you guys were talking about the, like, slow burn as opposed to, like, the firecracker thing. And that is something that I really, really have. Has been hugely helpful for me lately.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Is the. Is just slow and steady, baby. Just, like, really slow and steady. And I do think that it works because. Because you're gathering information.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You're just, like, gathering slowly.

[A]

I think it's also so healthy to think about it in that way, because.

[B]

Slow burn doesn't mean we're, like, flatline on the first date. It's not like I'm like, oh, my God, like, you are so boring. I'm gonna fall asleep. But, like, let's go for a second just in case. Like, no, there's. There is a spark, but it's not to the point where you're, like, leaving so overwhelmed, because again, usually that means chemical. It's chemical.

[C]

It's chemical. And it's something in your. I forgot what podcast it was, but it was saying that, like, if it's chemically and it's, like, fizzy, and it's, like, nervous, and your nervous system is going, then it's triggering the child in you that found something in the child in them. And you guys are, like, doing that nervous energy thing, and that's not real. That's not safe. That's. Oh, my God. This is, like, my mom. And, like, I can fix this.

[B]

You're like, I love you. Like, let me solve all your problems. Let me do my savior complex right now. Put me in, coach. And it's like, oh, my God. No, you can. What you want is a mature relationship where you can look at the person, be like, I actually see we have similar interests.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

We have a very, like, similar values. Like, that is what you need to.

[C]

Yell at the waiter.

[B]

If you yell at the. What was his name? I wish I get. Ricky, knock it off. The waiter deserves better. Okay?

[C]

I. And of course, I did the thing where I was like, I'm so. I.

[B]

It's.

[C]

It's totally fine. He doesn't need the new. It's. Yeah.

[B]

And then you went on another date with him. Oh, my God. So many. But you needed to learn it yourself. And then did you. What, did you eventually just not talk to him again?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Okay. You know, you're like, no, I have a date. I have a date tonight. No, no, no. Nope. Not no, it's over.

[C]

No.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

We are.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Donezel Washington.

[B]

So what is. Thank you. What is your approach to dating right now? And like, are you. And I know this is, like, too premature, but, like, are you open to getting married again in the future? Are you just not even thinking about that right now? Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Airbnb. You guys, I feel like 2025 was the year of personal trips for me. I'm always traveling for work. But this year I really felt like I found time with Airbnb to find incredible good places to stay. Whether it was a romantic getaway, whether I was traveling for one of my friends weddings, Matt and I really made sure that we were staying in Airbnbs because when I'm traveling, I want to feel comfortable. I want to feel like I have a piece of home with me. And as you guys know, I love my dogs, Henry and Bruce. Shout out if you're listening to this. I want to be with my dogs at all times. And so finding an Airbnb that can accommodate dogs really means a lot to me. And Airbnb is the best way to make your trip one to remember because you get to explore not only a new city, but a new space in that city. I personally love staying like a local because it really helps you immerse yourself wherever you are, as opposed to feeling like you're a tourist. You can grab groceries at local market. You can explore the neighborhood bars and the restaurants. And if you just want to go somewhere but you don't really know where yet, let Airbnb make the decision for you. Guest favorites might inspire you and perhaps even create a new tradition. My number one tip is to check out Airbnb first to find the perfect place to stay, because your accommodation can really make her break the trip.

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[B]

Are you open to getting married again in the future? Are you just not even thinking about that right now?

[C]

That's a good question. Because I vacillate a little bit because I think it's a huge. You're getting married soon, so you. So I can't, you know, destroy this too much.

[B]

Marriage is off. Alex, run. I'm like, no. Okay, off. Matt, we're done.

[C]

No, you're already married, right?

[B]

No.

[C]

Oh, I thought you got the license and everything.

[B]

Oh, oh, you're right. Oh, I am legally married. Oh, my God. I'm like, am I married?

[C]

Wait, did I get that wrong?

[B]

You're right. Oh, I love that.

[C]

I'm telling you about you.

[B]

I love that you're Matt. It seemed like, Alex, I am married. Well, no, to be fair, I was waiting for the 90 day thing, and I think by now, I think I am legally married. But my wedding is coming up.

[C]

Right, Right.

[B]

So those are.

[C]

That's what matters.

[B]

Yes, you're right. Weddings matter. Marriage matters more. And I am married. And this is good to know. Note to self, Alex, you're married. You dumb. I am married. I. I think so. Let me check.

[C]

It's like a technicality. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, technicality. Anyways, back to you telling me I shouldn't get married.

[C]

No, no, I'm not gonna tell you because here's the thing. Marriage is awesome, okay? And I loved being married. I really thrive in relationship. I do.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

And I think that there's something so beautiful about the, like, you know, this. The coming together and being like, we got each other, partnership, teammates. I do. I love that idea. I don't. I vacillate a little bit of, like, can you have that without the paperwork? Just because I've been on the other side. But I also am a hopeless romantic. I love love. I can't help it. And so I would love to be able to believe in marriage again. And I date to. I'm, you know, I'm dating to. To find my person.

[B]

I think that's absolutely the right way to look at it. Like, of course, like, you would love one day. Like, maybe. But I think a lot of times we can get. Dating's exhausting.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[B]

And it can get infuriating. But I do think everyone who has been in love at one point, and you don't. We don't even need to take away from past loves. It's like, that feeling is amazing when you are with someone you love and then even if they become a piece of later, like, you can just remember those good moments when you're dating. It's like you are dating to find the even better version of that feeling. And I think that is. That should make people feel hopeful of, like, put in a little bit of work for like, a year to two years, to three years, to five years to then have a lifetime with someone. Like, it's. It comes. We just have to be patient. But it is annoying. I like, it can be annoying, but then it also can be really fun.

[C]

Because you can be like, some of my favorite women right now are, like, still dating after heartbreak. I mean, that's huge. It's so strong to be able to put yourself out there like that again and to believe that you are worthy after totally. Something bad happens in that way. That's badass. So I. And you have to believe in yourself in order to know that you can withstand your own mind.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

In the. In the battle of that, I agree.

[B]

And I think because women are so judged based off of our age and our looks and all the things and society tells us, like, you're dead by 30. Like, oh, my God, like, feeling my best as I'm entering this new era like you, I think we can also just start to say it and just, like, do what makes you feel good. Like, don't. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there. Date, have fun. Like, we're alive once. Give it a fucking try. Meet people. Connect with people. Like, if you can change your perspective on it. I think when people look at. I was like, oh. Like, have you found the one? Like, no. And that's so exciting because that means they're out there and you're gonna figure it out.

[C]

There was some great advice that someone gave me where they're like, if you're looking for them, they're looking for you. And it was so simple, but I thought, oh, yeah. Like, if you're out there and I feel like I'm pretty cool, right? Then someone's out there. That's pretty cool too. That's like, where is she?

[B]

Where is she? And one day you're gonna walk in and they're gonna be so nice to the waiter. You're like, oh, my God, this is totally the right guy for me. What is your best quality that you bring to a relationship?

[C]

The more surface one, I guess, is I. I'm. I'm pretty fun. I'm a good time. Whether or not you like me or not, you're gonna have a good time. Not sexually or maybe. But. But, like, maybe I meant Like, I meant more like on the day. Like, good banter, good conversation. You know, you're gonna.

[B]

Men clip this when you go on dates and then be like, I want this. What is this? You're like, oh, let me take you for a ride. Not sexually, but maybe just a good.

[C]

Time means so many different things nowadays.

[B]

Yes, it does. It does.

[C]

But I had to, you know, explain that. But I think emotionally, I am extremely. I, like, I really, really get into the. The nitty gritty with somebody. Like, I. I go hard for them. I, like, I'm super passionate about what they're passionate about. I really am, like, a great partner because I just love. I love that teammate aspect. And I love. I think, like, in relationships, too, we don't listen enough. And I really like to listen when I'm in a partnership.

[B]

What is your take on if you don't fight in a relationship, it automatically means you're in a healthy relationship.

[C]

I completely disagree. And I know this from experience.

[B]

Yep.

[C]

Because I think men. And this is another generalization, because it's not true for everyone. I do think men have learned that. That having that sort of emotional, like, fight is much more of a woman's thing. Saying what you feel, and let's fight about it now. And they've been trained to stuff it down. It doesn't really matter. Let's talk about it tomorrow. And I always think that sometimes is detrimental to a relationship, sometimes. Because I do think that there's a lot of regrets, there's a lot of love and, you know, companionship and collaboration to be had in the. The normalcy of. Of good fighting.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Not yelling at each other and throwing things, but coming from two perspectives.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, it. Yeah. I feel like it comes down to communication. Like, I feel like there are so many relationships that people can look back and be like, we never fought. AK like, we never really talked. We talked.

[C]

AK you probably never had sex.

[B]

Sex.

[C]

Because intimacy, it's conflict is intimacy, and so is really talking to them, and so is sex. And so it's so. I think it's intertwined.

[B]

It's a good point. Or it's like the most disconnected sex. And you're, like, literally thinking of someone else. You're like. And then he's like, do you like that? You're like, oh, yeah, yeah, sorry. Yeah. You're, like, literally out of body thinking about someone else. Like, yeah. If you really break it down. And that's why it is, like, kind of, like, beautiful when you get out of relationships and have a little bit of time to reflect. It all comes together for you. Everything that you were blinded by in the relationship. You're like, huh, that is fascinating that I put up with that. Or we both put up with that. Like, we both got okay with that situation. Totally. It's a really weird cycle that you can get into, and you don't see it until you're out of it. You're like, yeah, God damn.

[C]

And I'm glad. That's why I've waited a year to talk to you, to bring it back to the beginning, full circle. I love it because I do have so much more perspective on. I think I would have. If I would have come here a year ago, I would have been so angry and I would have not been able to see also my part in things of, like, who was I there? Because I was there too, you know?

[B]

Totally.

[C]

And I think a lot of times we get so bogged down on the. The situation and what happened that we don't look at it from the other side. And I know what I need to change going into my next relationship of who I want to be. So true.

[B]

Let's close out one more time with your movie. Parachute. I. I'm so inspired by you and what you are doing with the themes in this movie. Can you just give, like, a little final pitch to the daddy gang of, like, I feel like men and women, but, like, specifically for the ladies listening, like, why should they see this movie? And, like, what do you think it will do for women when they watch?

[C]

I hope it's a. It's a combination of being incredibly romantic and a beautiful love story, but something that I feel is connected to everybody and something that maybe sheds light on a feeling you didn't know how to put into words. That would be my pie in the sky. Hope is that you maybe feel like this, but you didn't know how to. To formulate that until you saw it. And I've. I think my biggest compliment that I've gotten from people seeing the movie, specifically men who don't have to have these issues as. As most. As many women, they say to me, wow, I, you know, my sister has this. My mom had this, my whatever or, you know, guys too. But I didn't understand it. And now I have a little bit more context of how painful it is, and it's changed my perspective on it.

[B]

It's amazing.

[C]

That's what I would hope.

[B]

Again, I. I think what's fun about having conversations like this is, like, the struggles that you've had through your life and everything of, like, you sitting here earlier being like, there was a point where, like, I didn't know if I could keep going. Going through something that's also so relatable and heartbreaking and divorce and, like, all these, like, very humanistic struggles that we all can relate to. I think it's encouraging to see you sitting here right now being like, I'm figuring it out. Because that there is, you know, there's someone that literally one of those things is happening to them right now, and this interview could be something that they're like, all right, I'm gonna keep pushing because I just watched Britney and goddamn, look where she's at. And that can be me in a year. So thank you so much for coming on and talking with me. And you're the shit.

[C]

And you're the shit.

[B]

Thank you so much for coming on.

[C]

Thank you so much for having me. This was awesome.

[B]

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[B]

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[A]

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