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Mark Gagnon
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Little Pete
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Mark Gagnon
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Little Pete
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Rory Rosen
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Little Pete
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Rory Rosen
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Little Pete
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Rory Rosen
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Little Pete
I have a huge armpit, by the way.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, well, you have an armpit.
Little Pete
Yeah, I do. I every. Every girl that I for the last 20 years, I lick their armpits.
Mark Gagnon
Wait, wait, hold on. Give. Wait. What?
Little Pete
Shortly thereafter, I was telling you I got arrested for that fight with my mother's boyfriend on Christmas, which I will talk to.
Mark Gagnon
There's not really a punchline. My gets hard and then the clip ends and I die laughing in my bed alone.
Little Pete
Was to come up to me right now and say, hey, little B, you want to go to Mars? I'd be like, nah, that. Let's go for strip club. I Cialis every day.
Mark Gagnon
Every day.
Little Pete
I don't even have erectile dysfunction. Cialis is good for your heart.
Rory Rosen
But. But Lil Pete was chosen by God to master the people.
Little Pete
I understand. I would not have died bald. I remember before I seized out at the gas station, I was feeling pretty nice.
Rory Rosen
I call him Accidental Dice Clay.
Little Pete
But I have dated some strippers with good hearts and did. That's right, laugh it the up.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, this is wild.
Rory Rosen
It's amazing. Lil Pete, he's a unicorn.
Little Pete
And it's all covered by the plan.
Mark Gagnon
You know you're on a plan at the brothel.
Little Pete
Okay. The ghost of little Pete wears a toupee. I would have came back from the dead to get that.
Mark Gagnon
Pete, this is insane.
Little Pete
Toupee. How much you pay?
Rory Rosen
You don't know. Weinstein's out.
Mark Gagnon
No.
Rory Rosen
Yeah. All is well.
Mark Gagnon
Again, random question. I ask all my guests this question. Have you ever been possessed by a demon?
Little Pete
Okay, I was on a three day crystal meth binge.
Rory Rosen
How tall was he?
Little Pete
Oh, he's Big. He's like Mark Site, bro. He's a big dude, bro. He's a big dude. He's 75, 74, 70.
Mark Gagnon
What's up, everybody? And welcome back to camp. Yes, this is the show, typically, where we're talking to, you know, people have been abducted by aliens, archaeologists, philosophers, and sometimes we're doing tent talks where I explain the most interesting things to my dumbest friends. But today it's gonna be a little different, all right? Because today I have two people in front of me that I'm very, very excited to introduce to you. The first is my good friend Rory Rosen. Very funny comedian here. How are you, Roy? And the gentleman sitting next to him is. The goat is a fascinating character in the world of comedy. His name is Little Pete. How are you, Little Pete?
Little Pete
Pleasure to meet you all. Mark, thank you for having me on here, man.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, of course, bro.
Little Pete
Very, very excited about this podcast.
Rory Rosen
You know, before. Before we start anything, we. Little Pete, we got to make one thing very clear to everybody.
Little Pete
Go ahead, go ahead.
Rory Rosen
Little Pete don't give a fuck.
Little Pete
Little Pete don't give a fuck. You don't give a. I'm going to tell you the origin of that story and everything, okay? I got a bunch. I got a bunch of stuff.
Mark Gagnon
I just need to preface a little bit, okay? I've been in comedy a while now, okay? I've been doing stamps since I was, like, 18 years old. And when you do comedy a long time, you see a lot of comedians come through. And now with clips, you know, I see a ton of different types of jokes and, you know, I see things and I'm. I go, oh, that's funny. This is very clever. This is very smart. Someone has, like a funny, you know, misdirection. You go, oh, wow, that's great. And then one day, I'm scrolling on Instagram maybe like almost a year ago, and I see a clip from a guy named Peter Francis, AKA Little Pete. And I see it pop up and there's no real traditional joke structure. There's you on stage. It's like a 15 second clip. I don't remember which one it was, okay? And there's, you know, some. Some setup. There's not really a punchline, and the audience doesn't really laugh. And then the clip ends and I die laughing in my bed, alone.
Rory Rosen
The funniest clips you've ever seen in your life.
Mark Gagnon
And then I watch another one, and then I binge your entire page and watch almost every single clip, and they all have me howling, laughing, and I can't. I can't even describe. It's like you broke comedy, okay. And you're a self described anti comic is the way you put it. It's like some type of absurd misdirect, not following the traditional form of what comedy is. But my rules for comedy, as we were saying before, be original first and then be funny. And you're doing both.
Little Pete
Thank you.
Mark Gagnon
So maybe just to start to introduce the audience, can we play a couple of your clips? Just. Just give people a taste.
Little Pete
You like anyone.
Mark Gagnon
Maybe we start with the Elon Musk clip, okay. Because this just. It just blew my mind. All right, let's go up to me.
Little Pete
Right now and say, hey, little P, you want to go to Mars? I'd be like, nah, fuck that. Let's go to a strip club. It's right down the block. Go see some titties and some ass.
Mark Gagnon
You know, that's the whole clip.
Little Pete
Can we play?
Mark Gagnon
There's another one.
Rory Rosen
Lil Pete is a legend of the strip clubs here.
Little Pete
Yeah, yeah, yeah, bro.
Mark Gagnon
The. The happy endings. Can we go to the happy ending?
Little Pete
Yes, absolutely.
Rory Rosen
This is Lil Pete's big break.
Little Pete
Yeah, this is my most.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, this is how most people discover.
Little Pete
Little Pete in my life, man. More than I could ever keep track of. So much so that if I ever hear the sound of a Chinese woman's voice, my dick gets hard. Yo, I'd be calling up to order Chinese and she's like, ha, you want to poke a fire rice, yo? My dick starts throbbing. No, it's a bit.
Rory Rosen
Because it's kind of like the point where he chooses to end the clip is another joke ending.
Mark Gagnon
Like, me and my friends, literally, like, we'll say something and then we just go, clip ends. And it's our inside joke. Because that's like you're expecting there to be another thing, and then there's not.
Little Pete
And it's funny because I actually went to the Asian house this weekend. I went on Saturday. And you know, they. They shower you before they you, okay? And the girl starts spraying the faucet on my head. I'm like, to pay to pay. And she's like, aw, to pay. How much you pay for anybody who's interested, I was paying 560amonth, but they just upgraded me to the $700 a month plan. But it's all inclusive. Yo, I will turn this shit into a fudgeing Mohawk now, okay? And it's all covered by the plan.
Mark Gagnon
You know you're on a plan at the brothel.
Little Pete
No, no, not a plan. At the brothel? At the.
Mark Gagnon
Subscription plan. At the Asian brothel.
Little Pete
No, no. But I'm at the point where I don't even call anymore. I just go knock on the door.
Rory Rosen
You know, he doesn't have like a. Like that kind of relationship with the brothel, but he may as well.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, I notice also on your Instagram, so you post these clips all the time. You post a lot. Okay. And they're all very funny to me. Okay, we're going to watch a couple more later. But you also post in your story, and it'll be a mixture of, like, motivational quotes that get me fired up. You know what I mean? It'll be something from, like, Sun Tzu, maybe Marcus Aurelius stoicism, Maybe some. Maybe Senica, perhaps one of the stoics.
Rory Rosen
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
And then it'll also just be only fans girls with their boobs out. And it'll just be back to back.
Little Pete
Correct.
Mark Gagnon
Wow. What is your. So what is that? Why do you post so many only fans girls in your story?
Little Pete
Okay, when I'm posting my. My story, I'm literally speaking to myself and my subconscious. I'm telling myself the things that I need to tell myself in order to keep fighting, in order to get to the next level of my life, okay? And one of the things that I use for motivation, besides motivational quotes, is women that I would like to fuck. You know I'm saying? Because what motivates you more than a girl that you would have to level up to fuck? You know what I'm saying? So, like, when I'm at work and I'm. I'm trying to make sales on the phone, I got to keep myself motivated when I'm going to do a comedy show and I need to make the crowd laugh, I got to keep myself motivated. So this is what I use, you know what I'm saying? If there's something I see that I need to oblige by, like, you know what I'm saying? Like, there was this one quote that I saw, right? And I really liked it. And I actually saw it right before I posted that video that made a big difference in my life. It said, the temptation to quit will be the strongest right before the victory. Okay? And I swear to God, the author of the quote is unknown. It's a Chinese.
Mark Gagnon
It's a gambler. It's a guy with a gambling addiction.
Little Pete
I think when I posted that video, I was almost like, on the verge of quitting comedy. I swear to God. I had auditioned for the New York comedy festival in 20, 23. I didn't get picked. Shortly thereafter, I was telling you I got arrested for that fight with my mother's boyfriend on Christmas, which I will talk to. How old is he?
Rory Rosen
L is your mother's boyfriend.
Little Pete
He's 75. So I have been arrested for assaulting a senior citizen.
Mark Gagnon
We got to get to that story.
Rory Rosen
He's a good man. Lil Petey's a good man.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, we're going to get to that.
Little Pete
Story, the whole thing.
Mark Gagnon
But. But you. But you're. You're having a couple L's in a row, okay? You having some losses, you're feeling low. You read this quote, you post it on your story. Post a clip goes viral, and you go, you know what? I'm staying in it. Yeah, that's. And then you also post a couple.
Little Pete
Yeah, couple.
Mark Gagnon
Only fans.
Little Pete
Girls also always. Always with the only fan.
Mark Gagnon
And I also go to his story right now. Can we go to Little Pete Comedy on Instagram just to see.
Little Pete
And I play whatever song has caught my ear on the radio, you know?
Mark Gagnon
So they're not connected?
Little Pete
No, not connected. But I am now that I've been posting. Okay, so much, I actually am talking to them online.
Rory Rosen
So wait, be the person you. That you would look up to?
Mark Gagnon
Yes. Another quote. Keep going, keep going.
Rory Rosen
Let it go.
Little Pete
You spoke about when. When I was posting my video of Hoes Need Love to.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
She actually reached out to me and she said, thank you for showing love to the hoes. Thank you for showing love to the hoes. That. That one right there. Violent.
Mark Gagnon
Okay. If you want to make the wrong decision, ask everyone. Yes. And let's go to the next one.
Little Pete
Andrew Tate, very inspired by this man.
Mark Gagnon
Dropping bars. All right, let's go to the next.
Little Pete
Ball guys I've ever looked up to. One of the first ball guys I've ever looked up to.
Mark Gagnon
And then a baddy.
Little Pete
And then just a baddy.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, and then just a baddy.
Little Pete
And then.
Mark Gagnon
Let's go, Jules.
Little Pete
Blow. Yeah, she. She cleaned house at the AVN Awards. This baby right here.
Mark Gagnon
Did you watch the AVN Awards?
Little Pete
I did not. I didn't get a chance. I would love to watch, but I didn't get a chance.
Mark Gagnon
Okay. So now I feel like people understand basically what. What I know about Lil Pete just kind of on the surface. All right, so let's just kind of take it from the beginning. All right? Why do they call you Little Pete?
Little Pete
All right, so growing up, we had, like, 10 Pete's in the crew.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Okay. So everybody needed a. A tag Name? We had Big Pete. We had Little Pete. We had Junk Ball Pete, we had Gay Pete, we had Sound Factory Pete.
Rory Rosen
You know, like, was that four or five?
Little Pete
Yeah. So no, and the list goes on and on and on.
Rory Rosen
So you said Sound Factory Pete?
Little Pete
Yeah, that's. That's my best friend. And he went to Sound Factory every weekend for like three years.
Mark Gagnon
What? Sound Factory.
Little Pete
It was an old club back in the day. It was like an old rave type of club. House music.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
And he went like for three years straight on, every Saturday. You know, we used to go there, we used to do Molly's, we did ecstasy, all of that. And he never, he never missed a weekend in three years. Okay, Sound Factory Pete. Because we got too many Pete's in the crew.
Mark Gagnon
Right. You know, but why was yours Little Pete?
Little Pete
Oh, because. Because of my height. Because at the time, you know, you got one guy was like six foot two. Everybody else is like five seven, five eight. So I'm going to be Little Pete. You know, I'm saying because I'm on the shorter end of the stick.
Mark Gagnon
How tall are you with. With lifts?
Little Pete
With the lifts. I'm wearing lifts right now. I'm a little over five two.
Mark Gagnon
That's great.
Little Pete
If you were to put me flat foot, I'm probably more like 5 1.
Mark Gagnon
You told me that you will sometimes wear 4 pairs of lifts at a time.
Little Pete
There was a time in my life when I did. I was wearing four pairs of lifts with Timberlands.
Rory Rosen
Okay, you probably were like around 5 7.
Little Pete
With the spikes in my toupee. Yes, yes. And I'm telling you like I would be having sex with girls and I'm rocking back and forth like a rocking chair. You know what I'm saying? And then one day my friend's like, yo, nobody comes in my apartment without the shoes on. I'm like, oh my God, it's all about to collapse right now. So I take my shoes off and like, I literally tackle the girl to the bed because I don't want her to see how short I am. You know, this is my 20, you know what I'm saying? Like, I'm. I'm 40 years old. Yeah. The, the height thing, I, it does not matter to me now because I realized that I was put on this earth to be Little Pete.
Mark Gagnon
That's true.
Little Pete
I got to rep that right into my five foot casket.
Mark Gagnon
And most importantly, Little Pete don't give a.
Little Pete
Little Pete don't give a. Don't give a. Little Pete don't give a.
Mark Gagnon
Now you were, you were Telling me before in your 20s, that I asked who was the most busted girl you ever took down?
Little Pete
Yeah. She was wearing a patch over her. One of her eyes. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
So she had an eye patch?
Little Pete
Yeah, she had an eye.
Rory Rosen
She had one eye.
Little Pete
Yes. But listen, if I was sober, I probably wouldn't have hit it, you know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
But, but why does she have the eye patch? Did you ever find out?
Little Pete
No, that I actually don't know. Obviously she was missing an eyeball.
Rory Rosen
That would be rude to ask.
Little Pete
Yeah. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Would it be, Would it be rude just to be like, oh, are you, were you, do you work on the high seas or, like, to get an idea of, like. Yeah, I don't know. Like, I, I, I, I feel like it could come up in a natural way, you know? But you never asked.
Little Pete
No, I never asked.
Mark Gagnon
And, but was she a good lover?
Little Pete
Listen, she was probably better in bed than I was because I was, like, actually too coked up to get my dick hard. So. So I got a softy blowjob and then I just ate her out. And then I just jerked off. The nut went all over the place, including my friend's mattress. He wanted to kill me.
Mark Gagnon
No.
Little Pete
Yeah. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, wow. On one out of 10, what would you put her at?
Little Pete
Four and a half. She's getting four points for a good person. Yeah. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Respect. Who? And who's the baddest girl you ever took down?
Little Pete
Oh, I've taken down some bad ones in my day, man.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. What are we talking?
Little Pete
I'm talking about, I've gotten girls that are way out of my league based on, based on bravery. Okay? And just having the balls to go up and kick it to them when nobody else did and just like, just having, like, the realest game, you know?
Mark Gagnon
I'm saying, what's your opening line? If there's a girl that's taller than you, let's say she's high heels.
Rory Rosen
Like, if you don't mind, if you, your mind, Little Pete, you. From the perspective of a woman, right, you have to think that, like, you've talked to Lil Pete. Now you, you know Lil Pete.
Mark Gagnon
I felt.
Rory Rosen
Dan, if you're a woman, you look at Little Pete and you go, well, he's not conventionally attractive, but this is about to be a fun night.
Mark Gagnon
Yes.
Rory Rosen
You got, you, you told me there's some strippers that you sub with. You said that the strippers will, like, go around, be like, yo, I. Little Pete, last Thursday. That was crazy.
Little Pete
I'll just Be like, yo, you are, like, the baddest up in this. Okay? You're beautiful. All right. What are you drinking? All right. Okay. And I'll take it from there. You know what I'm saying? Like, you can't try to, like, break too much ice on the first impression or they're gonna think you're, like, an amateur. Like. Like a real. A real g. A real man has a lot of patience. And if you were to walk away right now, that's your loss, because I'm gonna kick it to somebody else, and she's gonna get the benefits of who I am and my personality and everything else I bring to the table. And, like, when you can look in a woman's face and say that with your energy like I do, they're going to stay.
Mark Gagnon
I feel you have big dick energy.
Little Pete
I do have big dick energy. I do. I do.
Mark Gagnon
You know, but do you also have a. Are you packing?
Little Pete
Yeah, I'm packing. I'm. I'm easily seven and a half. No, bro. And, like, I take Cialis every day.
Mark Gagnon
I don't read.
Little Pete
I don't even have erectile dysfunction. Okay. Cialis is good for your heart, it's good for your skin, and it gives you the biggest hard on you ever had in your life. I think you got to be crazy not to take it. You know, My doctor told me anything that makes your dick hard is good for you. I'll tell you all about me all over. He's all over YouTube. He's YouTube famous.
Mark Gagnon
Okay?
Little Pete
Right. Anything that a hard dick means. Good blood flow and good blood flow. That's what keeps us alive, baby.
Mark Gagnon
Yes.
Little Pete
Yes.
Mark Gagnon
Vasodilation. You want the blood moving.
Little Pete
I take Cialis every day, just, like.
Mark Gagnon
As a supplement, like fish oil.
Little Pete
You take a little vitamin, and then.
Mark Gagnon
You take a Cialis.
Little Pete
I take Cialis. I take testosterone. I'm prescribed. Yes.
Mark Gagnon
You're on T right now.
Little Pete
Yeah, My testosterone.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, you're pretty seasonal.
Little Pete
Yeah. Very low. Very low dosage. My. My doctor has me on the greatest anti aging stack you'll ever be on.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, you look good. I'll be honest.
Little Pete
Thank you. Ten years younger.
Mark Gagnon
You look nice.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. I mean, and the toupee. So. So how long have you had a toupee for?
Little Pete
I put it on March 26, 2000. I have a great memory. I have a great memory.
Mark Gagnon
March 26, your anniversary is coming up with the toupee. And it's a nice toupee. It looks very real.
Little Pete
And one of the things I say in my Comedy. I say people are celebrating 15 years of marriage. I'm celebrating 15 years and not being.
Mark Gagnon
Bald, you know, and so you felt it thinning a little bit, and you said, you know what?
Little Pete
I did three hair transplant surgeries of Bosley.
Mark Gagnon
Really?
Little Pete
And I actually have a dent in my head from a surgery gone wrong. It was the beginning of my painkiller addiction.
Mark Gagnon
No.
Little Pete
I thought, I'm going to get my hair back. I end up getting addicted to fudgeing heroin over here.
Mark Gagnon
The wrong hair.
Little Pete
Yeah, yeah, exactly. You know, saying life path took a very unique turn.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, you got addicted to pain pills.
Little Pete
From hair transplant pills. Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Oh, deed. And came back from.
Little Pete
Yeah, bro. I was in a coma for 10 days, fighting for my life, man. I'm a fentanyl survivor, bro. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
How good is fentanyl?
Little Pete
Oh, bro. Well, listen, I mean, I was. I had a tube down my throat through most of the experience. But I remember before I. I seized out at the gas station, I was feeling pretty nice. I. It was 2017. Right. The date is May 16. I had gone home to see my mother for Mother's Day.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
I get off a plane and I tell my boy, go get me some blues. He goes to the ghetto of West Palm and he gets me some laced up blues. And I sniffed four of them in a bathroom at a. At a chick fil A. And they burned. And that's very uncommon for. For oxy to burn. Yeah. And I'm in a gas station getting cigarettes. There's a ambulance filling up at the pump. I went down. I seized out. My lungs collapsed. The ambulance took me to Palm Beach Gardens Hospital, where I stayed for 10 days fighting for my life. I choked on my own vomit. I. I became infected with klebsiella pneumonia, which is a deadly superbug virus. The survival rate is very low. Fuck. Yeah.
Rory Rosen
It's a miracle.
Little Pete
Yeah. The doctors are basically telling my mother, who flew down to Florida with. With her boyfriend that I knocked out last Christmas, flew down to Florida with her boyfriend who I knocked out. And like, she held my hand every day for the 10 days.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, wow.
Little Pete
Yeah. And my, My lung was infected. They had to do a very risky surgery where they cut into your lung. I'll show you guys the scar. I'll show you guys the scar. They drain the klebsiella out of your lung and they put it into a machine that heats it up past 110 degrees because your body can't run a fever higher than 105, 106. Once they've killed the bacteria they then put blood back into your body.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, wow.
Little Pete
Okay. Yeah. And once they did that, like on May 26, I woke up and I'll never forget the doctor. He came into the room and he was like, son, I've been doing medicine for 30 years. I've never seen anybody survive what you just survived. And he said, son, you're the exception to the rule.
Mark Gagnon
Wow.
Rory Rosen
And I don't want to get. I don't want to get too, too woo woo in here. But. But Lil Pete was chosen by God to be laughter to people. And I'm not even kidding, tell this story. But Lil P told me a funny story actually. When he woke up from the coma where that was like one of the few times ever that little Pete was seen without a toupee.
Little Pete
Oh, when I woke up, I had no toupee.
Mark Gagnon
Wait, was it that time?
Little Pete
It was it, yeah, it was this time.
Mark Gagnon
And so what happened? You wake up, you have no toupee, you just OD'd on fentanyl and you're grateful to be alive?
Little Pete
I am grateful to be alive. I'm like, where is my mother fucking toupee? Okay. I'm like, what the fuck? I'm like, go get me that shit right now. So they bring the toupee up. It's in a plastic bag. It was in a locker downstairs. And the glue is stuck to like 3, $400 in my drug money because I was using drugs, I was selling drugs. Now I'm signing a waiver to get my own fucking to payback, right? And for some reason, like, I don't remember crossing over to the other side or anything. I remember getting invited to 50 cents Halloween party. Okay.
Rory Rosen
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Wait, what?
Little Pete
That's what I'm thinking. I'm like, is he a fan? I was always a 50 Cent fan. No, I don't know if he knows who I am yet, you know.
Mark Gagnon
How did you get involved?
Little Pete
This message comes from Greenlight.
Rory Rosen
Ready to start talking to your kids about financial literacy? Meet Greenlight, the debit card and money.
Little Pete
App that teaches kids and teens how to earn, save, spend wisely and invest.
Rory Rosen
With your guardrails in place, with Greenlight, you can send money to kids quickly.
Little Pete
Set up chores, automate allowance and keep an eye on your kids spending with real time notifications.
Rory Rosen
Join millions of parents and kids building.
Mark Gagnon
Healthy financial habits together on Greenlight.
Rory Rosen
Get started risk free@greenlight.com Spotify.
Little Pete
Have you ever spotted McDonald's hot crispy fries right as they're being scooped into the carton? And time just Stands still. In. In the. In the coma, I got invited to $0.50 Halloween party.
Mark Gagnon
That was heaven for you.
Little Pete
That was heaven for me.
Mark Gagnon
To a different place. And that's what you saw. You saw Curtis being like, yeah, I'm.
Little Pete
Getting invited to $0.50 Halloween party, and I'm going there dressed as a Chucky.
Mark Gagnon
You remind me of 50 Cent. I met 50. Yeah, you guys have a similar. Like, he almost died and then turned his life around and, you know, became a great rapper, and you almost died and turned around and became a great rapper.
Little Pete
You know, rapper, comic, anti. Comic.
Rory Rosen
The first time Lil Pete told me that story, he goes, so, yo, I put that shit on my head so fast, I put that shit on sideways. And then he said, you know, yo, let me tell you something. The ghost, a Little Pete wearing a toupee.
Little Pete
I was like, anybody who was worried about me dying understand, I would not have died bald, okay? The ghost of Little Pete wears the toupee. I would have came back from the dead to get that. Okay, you did. Yeah, you did.
Mark Gagnon
You literally came back. I think if you had your toupee on, you would have just died.
Little Pete
Oh, man. Good thing. Good thing, that. Good thing. I had so many seizures that they had. The doctor's like, wait, we. We got to put the. The electros on his head. This motherfucker's wearing a toupee.
Mark Gagnon
I think you went. You went. You went to heaven. And 50 Cent said, hey, man, you got some unfinished business. All right?
Rory Rosen
Just imagine.
Little Pete
You got to just sit down here and pick up the pieces you broken.
Mark Gagnon
Don't get your. Ha. All right? Go do some comedy, and we'll see you in 50 more years.
Rory Rosen
So imagine my pet is in heaven, and 50 Cent is there in robes, glowing robes. Peter, we've been waiting for you.
Little Pete
Yeah, I'm on the phone with my boy, Sound Factory Pete, right? And he's tell. I'm telling him. I'm like, yo, we got invited to $0.50 Halloween party. We got to get costumes. He's like, bro, shut up. You didn't even get invited to your mother's house for Halloween last year. That's how up you are on heroin. And he's like, bro, listen to me. He's like, get some rest. I'm glad you're alive. He. He prayed for me when. When I was in the coma, okay? He goes, we got to have a very serious talk tomorrow, man, about you getting your life together. He's like, good night. I'm like, all right, no doubt. And then I'm like, wait, Pete, should I at least text 50 and tell him that we're not coming?
Mark Gagnon
You know, respect, like, yeah, he invited me. You say you're going to go.
Little Pete
I told him I was going to go in the coma, like, you know what I'm saying? I got at least text.
Mark Gagnon
Okay, so how did you end up fighting your mom's boyfriend on Christmas?
Little Pete
Okay, so.
Mark Gagnon
All right, so bring me all the way back. Like your mom, my mother. Father passes away.
Rory Rosen
Is this after you almost died?
Little Pete
Oh, yeah. This is many years later.
Rory Rosen
Many years.
Little Pete
This is many years later.
Mark Gagnon
So take me to the whole story.
Little Pete
All right, so what happened was my mother tore her meniscus in 2023 in the summer. She couldn't walk that well. I was carrying her up the stairs every night. You know what I'm saying? Every night when I would carry her up the stairs, I would be like, oh, you fat little fucker. My mother's 4 foot 10, 120 pounds, man. I come from a long line of fat little bastards, you know what I'm saying? So she started having the boyfriend over all the time because she couldn't go to his house, she couldn't walk. Well, and not that we don't get along. He does not get along with anyone. Yeah, he's got one of those personalities. He's very combative, you know?
Mark Gagnon
And how long have they been dating for?
Little Pete
Since 2010.
Mark Gagnon
Okay. It's a long time.
Little Pete
And we. We feed a lot of stray cats. Okay. I. I adopted a stray cat from the backyard, you know, and there was this one day, I was on my way out to the gym and there was a stray cat in the backyard. So I made a plate of chicken and cat food, and I handed him the plate. I said, listen, go feed the cat. I don't have time right now. I'm going to the gym. He looked like I had four heads. He's like, well, what do you want me to do? I'm like, go feed the cat. Like, it's not that hard. He took very much offense to this, me telling him to go feed the cat, you know?
Mark Gagnon
And now tell me a little bit about him. How old is he? Where is he from?
Little Pete
74.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
He lives like two blocks away. His wife died.
Mark Gagnon
Okay. He's from Bay Ridge.
Little Pete
Yeah, from Bay Ridge. And because my dad died, his wife died, me, him and my mother ended up hooking up in 2010. And I was always happy for her. I've always liked her with this guy because he's not a bad dude, you know, I'm saying And she seemed. She seemed happy, you know?
Mark Gagnon
But he takes a little bit of offense about this.
Little Pete
He's very combative, right? Took huge offense about me asking him to feed the stray cat.
Mark Gagnon
So what happened?
Little Pete
He had actually called the house phone and my mom was like, he wants to talk to you. He's like, I'm never gonna go feed one of the stray cats in your backyard again. I'm like, hey, listen, you want to hang out at my house, buddy, you got to feed fucking stray cats, okay? There's no way around it.
Mark Gagnon
We're taking care of the cats.
Little Pete
Exactly. They need us.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
You know what I'm saying? They need us. So when it comes to grocery shopping, he's very big on saving money. Instead of figuring out how to make it in life, he figured out how to save money on groceries, you know what I'm saying? Instead of making a million dollars, he probably saved a million dollars on groceries, you know what I'm saying? Hey, he's a. He's a genius too, but in a different sense.
Rory Rosen
Don't point at me because I'm Jewish, Mark.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, no, it wasn't because you were Jewish. Okay? Come on, bro. It's assumptive.
Little Pete
All right, so he came over on Christmas Eve and Christmas. And I knew that that wasn't a good thing.
Mark Gagnon
Wait, what?
Little Pete
That he came over two days in a row. Okay, so why is that not a good thing? Because too much of him is not a good thing. You know what I'm saying? You know, and I knew this, but my mother seemed like she didn't want to really, you know. You know, accept it.
Rory Rosen
So you can't see red flags when you're wearing rose colored glasses.
Little Pete
That is true. So. And my mother does not have the best vision. She just had the cataract surgery last week, you know. Yeah, yeah, she got to have another one in March. Okay, so they had an agreement where one day he was going to pay, one day she was going to pay. So she sends me to the grocery store with her card, does not tell me that he's reimbursing her for everything that I buy. If I would have known that, I wouldn't even went. Because he's one of those guys that'll really pick the bill with you. Me and my mother were not like that. We're very free with what we buy. We. We probably spend too much, me and my mother. It's just our nature, you know? I'll go to the grocery store, I'll get this, this, this, and this. I'm not Looking for deals.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
So I get two. Two ice creams. One a Ben and Jerry's cannoli flavored ice cream. Good choice. Awesome. Yeah, awesome.
Mark Gagnon
Very talented.
Little Pete
Yeah. And one is a green tea ice cream. Okay. Yeah, it was great.
Mark Gagnon
So Christmas Eve reminds you of the hat. Respect.
Little Pete
To pay. How much you pay? I actually went to eat her pussy in the shower and she sprayed my face. What the fuck are you doing? You say, so anyway, Christmas Eve, we. We ate, we enjoyed the ice cream, whatever. We ate the green tea ice cream. We didn't eat the cannoli flavored Ben and Jerry's. And there were two separate occasions where he won. He was coming out of my bathroom and I hadn't put a towel on the shower rack. And he goes, yo, let me talk to you. You always got to put a towel on the shower rack. And I'm like, okay, no problem. And then I had left my jacket on the back of a chair. And he said, you need to hang your jacket up. And I'm thinking like, yeah, this is like my house. So, like, you know, I'm saying that's my call. So the very next day on Christmas, he comes into the house and I actually shook his hand that day. I don't often shake this man's hand because I don't like it.
Mark Gagnon
Tension brewing.
Little Pete
It's been tension rule for 14 years.
Mark Gagnon
Wow.
Little Pete
And he comes in the kitchen and he's like, get over here, I gotta talk to you. And he brings up that I got the ice cream and I didn't get the $299 discount on it. So we actually both look at my mother, we. We both looked at my mom to see if she was going to mediate this. And my mother with the hurt knee looked away like, I don't want nothing to do this. So I. I go, get the fuck out of my house. Get the fuck out. You talk to me like that on Christmas? Get the fuck out of my house. His response, I'm not leaving. It's not your house. I go to the door, I open the door, I'm like, get the out. Get the out. You ain't never coming back here. Get the out of my house. So the guy puts on his jacket, he puts on his hat, but he doesn't leave. He starts to vent about everything that he's wanted to say to me for all these years. He goes, you're short. You're a loser. You live with your mother. You don't have a girlfriend. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. He goes, you're never gonna make it in comedy. I'm like, what'd you say to me? I'm like, yeah, your dead wife. Your dead wife.
Mark Gagnon
Crazy.
Little Pete
Yeah, crazy. Now he's taken off his hat, which is like a French beret. He's taking off his jacket. He steps to me in my living room. Boom, boom. Two smacks in the face. I can show you the pictures, okay? I'm like, boom, boom. He goes down.
Rory Rosen
All right.
Little Pete
Yeah, he's got stents in his heart, too. Like, five of them.
Mark Gagnon
He's wearing a beret.
Little Pete
Yeah, no, that's 75. The beret went flying. You know what I'm saying? The beret went flying. He gets back up, he grabs a metal umbrella can, slams it over my toupee.
Mark Gagnon
What?
Little Pete
The umbrella can goes flying. Now I. I punch him again, okay? And I grab him by his pants and I throw him into the front door, head first. He's on the floor. I step over him. I'm like, you. You don't never talk to me like that. I'm like, yo, I'm out here with love, baby. I'm like. I'm like, yo, talk to me like that and I'll bust your shit. You know what I'm saying? I'll bust your shit. So anyway, how tall is he? Oh, he's big. He's like, mark site, bro. He's a big dude, bro. He's a big dude.
Mark Gagnon
He's 75.
Little Pete
74. 74 at the time.
Mark Gagnon
He's 74. In that case, turning 75 in May. No, he deserved to be 74.
Little Pete
So.
Mark Gagnon
So what happens? Who go. He goes to the hospital.
Little Pete
He goes to the hospital, right?
Mark Gagnon
Who calls a. What does your mom do?
Little Pete
My mom is screaming. She's screaming. The cat is under the couch. He's hiding. Okay? He goes to the hospital, all right? And he gets mri X ray. So my mother is his emergency contact. And we get the text on his phone. My mother's like, oh, my God. He went to the hospital. He's getting X rays. He's gonna file a police report on you. She's like, take pictures of your face. Take pictures of your hand. Which I did. So now it's December 26th.
Mark Gagnon
Did you guys open presents, by the way?
Little Pete
We did not open presents. We never got. And he didn't get to eat the ice cream either. Cannoli flavored Ben and Jerry's ice cream. Like you said, it's delicious.
Mark Gagnon
It's fabulous.
Little Pete
Not worth getting your head cracked open, but it's good.
Mark Gagnon
But it makes the head crack open a little better. Yeah, yeah.
Little Pete
You can ice your head with. You know what I'm saying? So got my evil genius up in this.
Rory Rosen
Oh, man.
Little Pete
So December 27th, right? I had told my boss about this. My boss has had tons of run ins with the law in his life, you know, and he said, no, no, he's in your house. You. You can't get arrested for this. Unless he's being held captive, which he's not. December 27th. I come home, we're eating dinner, me and my mother knock at the door. Three policemen outside. They're like, yeah, Peter Francis, you're under arrest. My mother is like, do you have to put the handcuffs on him? The guy's like, oh, yeah, ma'am, I do. Unfortunately, you know, so he gave the.
Mark Gagnon
People'S elbow to a elderly family. Yeah, he's gonna need.
Little Pete
Now I'm getting taken out in handcuffs like John Gotti.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
Christmas. Christmas lights. Everybody's outside looking at the lights. I'm going out in handcuffs. You know what I'm saying? They took me to the precinct. The detective comes in, and she's like, yeah, you know, you're being charged with assault on a senior citizen, blah, blah, blah, which is a felony. Do you want to tell your side of the story? And I'm like, no, I'll wait till my lawyer gets here.
Mark Gagnon
Smart man.
Rory Rosen
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
What are you wearing on your perp walk?
Little Pete
What am I wearing? Oh, no, just regular jeans and.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Excuse me. Shirt like this.
Mark Gagnon
Okay, cool.
Little Pete
So my mom was very smart. My mom's a smart woman. She called my boss and she called the lawyer. My lawyer is actually Arthur Idalla, who represented Weinstein. My mom taught him. Yeah, my mom taught him when he was a kid.
Mark Gagnon
Weinstein.
Little Pete
Yeah. No, his lawyer represented Weinstein.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, the lawyer that represented. Not the best.
Rory Rosen
Look, he gets the best of the best.
Little Pete
The best of the best.
Mark Gagnon
The guy that represented Weinstein.
Little Pete
My lawyer? Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
You were like, this guy is. You know. But Weinstein went to jail.
Little Pete
Yeah, no, but he got him out. He got him out on technicality.
Mark Gagnon
Wait, Weinstein's out?
Little Pete
Yeah. He got reversed on technicality.
Rory Rosen
You didn't know? Weinstein's out.
Mark Gagnon
No.
Rory Rosen
Yeah. All is well again.
Little Pete
Things are the.
Rory Rosen
Way that they should be.
Little Pete
This guy had done a DUI case for me when I was in, like, my early 20s, and he helped me with it. You know, it was a crazy dui. So my mother actually got him on the phone, and he was like, don't worry, you know, I'm sending somebody down There, you know, we'll. We'll. You know, we'll help him.
Rory Rosen
Well, Pete has a lot of connections like that. By the way, Lil Pete went to high school with Chris DiStefano.
Little Pete
I did.
Mark Gagnon
Chris.
Little Pete
We went to college, actually. Chrissy D. Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, that's awesome.
Little Pete
Yeah, we. St. Joseph's College. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, and he played on the basketball team.
Little Pete
He did. He did.
Mark Gagnon
You also played on the basketball team.
Little Pete
No, I did not. You did it. I did not.
Mark Gagnon
Did you try out?
Rory Rosen
He was the ball.
Little Pete
I did not try out. I. I had finished my. My sports career ended in high school.
Mark Gagnon
Okay, fair.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
So. So the lawyer goes down. You're in prison.
Little Pete
I'm in. I'm in central booking. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Yeah. And you know, it's funny, the. The cop that took us from the precinct to central booking, he was like, I'm not going to cuff you guys, but you got to promise me that you're not going to run. And I'm like, do I look like El Chapo to you? You know what I'm saying? Where the hell am I going to run? Like, I'm just asking you to take me to the bathroom. I don't know where the it is. Is. I'm going to try to escape from central booking. My lawyer's coming down. I'll be out of here in five hours. You know what I'm saying? What do you think? I'm going to add fucking reckless endangerment to my fucking case?
Mark Gagnon
So what are you looking at time wise? If you're convicted of elder.
Little Pete
Elder abuse, at least two years in prison. Two years, bro.
Mark Gagnon
I don't know. Like, how do you think you're going to do in prison?
Little Pete
Terrible. Terrible.
Rory Rosen
I disagree.
Little Pete
No, bro, I will be literally like a first date. You know what I'm saying? Like, they're coming for me, day one.
Rory Rosen
No way. No, they would love you.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Rory Rosen
They would champion Lil Pete in prison.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Everyone would be like, yo, have you met this guy? I love this guy.
Little Pete
I'm gonna have to join, like, a gang or something.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, the gangs would be bidding on Lil Pete.
Mark Gagnon
Can you bring your toupee to prison?
Little Pete
I don't think so. Yeah, that's. That's the main point.
Mark Gagnon
Then you could join the skinheads. That'd be a lot.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
So, you know, it's, you know, good and the bad.
Little Pete
So. You know what's crazy? When I got arraigned and the. The DA read the police report, he left out everything about him attacking me first. Left out everything. Yeah. And it's funny because the judge was like, to the d. A. Wait, what was the fight over? And the guy goes, ice cream, your honor. And the judge was like, ice cream. So my mom, the good woman that she is, she actually made a statement. She signed an affidavit. She. She made a recorded statement saying what actually happened.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
And the case was dropped. The funny thing is she got back with him while all this was going on. Like, she's over here on one side destroying this case, Then she's going over his house for dinner and everything.
Mark Gagnon
So what did he think about your mom defending you?
Little Pete
You know, by the time that it. At the case actually got dropped, it was June, this was January. When all this happened, February, they were already back together. And he was just like, ah, whatever, you know what I'm saying? He. He knew that he got caught in a lie.
Mark Gagnon
So when was the first time you saw him? Since the fight happened?
Little Pete
I never saw him since, oh, one time in the grocery store about a month ago. We've never spoken since this.
Mark Gagnon
Since that happened, you guys never spoke?
Little Pete
He doesn't come over the house anymore?
Mark Gagnon
Never. Really?
Little Pete
No. Does not call.
Mark Gagnon
He never apologized to you?
Little Pete
No, he never apologized.
Mark Gagnon
Do you have any feeling that you want to apologize to him?
Little Pete
No. Because if we would have just had the fight, then. Yeah, but when somebody tries to actually get you thrown in prison and assault your time and ruin your life, that's no coming back.
Mark Gagnon
Wow.
Little Pete
Yeah. You know, I'm saying he tried as hard as he could to get me thrown in jail for. For what I didn't even do.
Mark Gagnon
So you saw him in the grocery.
Little Pete
Store like a month ago. He was buying groceries, probably saving $2 on each item, you know, And I just walked out of there, you know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
10 pints of ice cream, just holding them all up.
Little Pete
Instead of going to making 100 grand, he's trying to save 100 grand on groceries.
Mark Gagnon
Wow.
Little Pete
So.
Mark Gagnon
And so. But they're still together, your mom and this.
Little Pete
They're still together to this day.
Mark Gagnon
Wow.
Little Pete
My mother doesn't do well single man. You know what I'm saying? She was.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, a little older. You get lonely.
Little Pete
She. She's not good home on Saturday night. Like I said, I didn't do comedy for. For the time that they were actually broken up because, like, every time I leave the house, she's calling me, where are you? Where are you? So I don't, you know.
Mark Gagnon
Wow.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, that's wild.
Little Pete
That's a wild story.
Mark Gagnon
You told me that you had a Couple other stories you want to share. What's up, people? We're gonna take a break really quick because it has been alleged that I smell. This has been said countless times. It is complete slander. I don't believe this to be true. But word has gotten out from the flagrant boys that apparently I smell Again, it's not true. Anyone around me, ask anyone, and they'll confirm that this is not the case. But the people over at Mando, they reached out and they said, hey, if you're concerned about putting aluminum on your body, a lot of other products may have this. They might have aluminum that's actually inside their products. And you put it right on your lymph nodes. Mando said, hey, we have a solution for you, okay? Because this right here, whole body deodorant. That's right, whole body, no aluminum. None of the bad stuff that's gonna, you know, potentially cause issues for you health wise. Okay? Look into it. You wanna know what I love about Mando? Mando is clinically proven to control odor better than a shower with soap alone. Isn't that crazy? Stop showering. You don't need a shower anymore. Think about how many hours you waste showering every single day, right? Like, think about that in your total lifetime. It's probably years of your life spent showering with Mando. You get the time back to be making money with Mando. You're gonna get a ton of great smelling scents and fragrances. You're gonna get deodorant wipes. You're gonna get this whole body deodorant package. This is an invisible cream. I mean, you can. I use all of them at the same time just so I can spend more time with my grandmother. So if you're interested in getting time back, spending time with your dying loved ones and not showering ever again, What I want you to do is I want you to go to Shopmando. That's S-H-O-P Mando M A N--O.com and use the promo code Camp. That's right, Shopmando.com use the promo code camp. And for the listeners of this show, when you get the starter pack again, the starter pack is going to have everything you need. You're going to have a cream tube, you're going to get the solid stick deodorant. You're going to get two free products of your choice, like the deodorant wipes and you know, maybe the spray, maybe the, you know, mini body wash, whatever it is that you would like like, you're gonna get $5 off when you use the promo code camp. So if you're interested, check it out. Shopmando.com now let's get back to the show. What's up, guys? We're gonna take a break really quick because you need more time. It is the most valuable commodity that exists, and Huell is going to help you do that. All right? If you're like me, you're constantly on the go, you're constantly running late. I mean, every time I'm leaving my house, I'm going out the door and I'm like, I forgot to eat today. And then I find myself just eating garbage, like, throughout. I'm, like, going to the bodega or corner store, just grabbing, like, sugary nonsense or even if I'm trying to e oftentimes it's packed with stuff that's terrible for me. And that's why I love Huel. All right, Huel is everything you need. It is a complete balanced meal, all in this convenient, beautiful little bottle. In this bottle, I'm telling you right now, you're going to get everything you need to power you through the day. 35 grams of protein, 25 vitamins and minerals, 7 grams of dietary fiber. I mean, omega 3, omega 6, everything that you need. I mean, it is a scientific process to put all the nutrients packed into this bottle. Not only is it extremely convenient and you can take it on the go with you anywhere you need. It's ext healthy. It's going to give you all the energy and good vibes to get through the day in order to tackle everything, whether it's going to the gym, going to work, you know, going on a date with your girl, whatever you need. And most importantly, it's extremely affordable. That's right, it is. You know, you're going to see these in your corner store, in your bodega, and your 711 gas station back home. Pick up a Huel. Try it for yourself. It tastes great, it's easy, it's convenient, it's good for you, and it's very affordable. And it actually just got a little bit more affordable for the people that listen to this show. That's right. Because when you go to hu.com and use a promo code camp, that's Huell h u e l.com camp. Use the promo code camp. And the listeners of this program are going to be getting 15% off and a free gift. What is that gift? No one knows. But if you want to find out, check it out. Huell.com use the promo code camp. Get 50% off your order and try it.
Little Pete
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Little Pete
Okay. So, yeah, the exception to the rule was one of them. And you guys want to hear the origin of Little Pete don't give a.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, I'd love to. Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Yeah.
Little Pete
All right.
Mark Gagnon
So do you know this?
Rory Rosen
No, actually, I don't know that. Have you told me the origin of little.
Little Pete
I've never told the story.
Rory Rosen
This is beautiful.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
All right, so this is last April. I'm in Hustler strip club, you know, and I'm doing a threesome with these two chicks, and one of them is on top of me in the 69 position, and the other one is eating my ass out.
Mark Gagnon
You're having. You're having sex with this?
Little Pete
I'm having sex with these girls in the back. Back?
Rory Rosen
Yeah, we're doing Legend.
Little Pete
We're doing a 69.
Mark Gagnon
So how does that work? I don't mean to interject too much in the story, but I've been to strip clubs. I've never had sex with a stripper.
Little Pete
Okay. You have to go there often. You have to get to know the girls. And I've done that enough to where I have, like, interpersonal relationships with them outside of the strip club. So, like, when we go to the back, like, we're getting down to business, you know, and it's costly. You got to take care of them, but they will compensate you. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
So when you get your ass eaten.
Little Pete
Oh, yeah, I was getting my ass eaten. The one girl's on top of me in the 69, she farts in my face, and she's like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I'm like, nah, I don't give a. Girl eating my ass goes, yeah, you heard him. Little Pete don't give a. Yeah, on top of me goes, yeah, Little Pete don't give a. So for the remainder of the time that we were in that room together, we're all screaming out like, little Pete don't give a. And the next week, I got on stage at Rodney's to do a spot for my boy. And, you know, before I started my set, I was like, listen, before I start my set, I want you all to keep one thing in mind. Little Pete don't give a. And it just caught, like wildfire, you know?
Mark Gagnon
Yo, too soon, bro.
Rory Rosen
Come on, Little Pete.
Mark Gagnon
Too soon. Wildfire right now. Yeah, come on, Come on.
Little Pete
My apology. It caught like the flu.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, the flu, bro. There's a Lil Pete.
Rory Rosen
I understand that, like, in a lot of his videos that you watch, part of what's funny, like, there aren't laughs and a lot of the beats and sometimes like that, sometimes a lot of them have huge laughs. When we get to the. To the gladiator bit, there's a huge pop there. But. But when I saw Lil Pete and I kind of saw his potential, I started putting up on my show that I run at the stand every other month. And when I tell you that if you put Lil Pete on a good show, murders, murders. People doubling over. And a lot of people just say that people murder because they're good. Okay? Lil Pete murders. It's beyond good. People are kicking, people are fucking. Like glasses are falling.
Little Pete
Like, stomachs is hurting. It's crazy.
Rory Rosen
It's in what Lil Pete has been able to do on our show. Like, I've. And there are a lot of great comics that will play that room in the stand. I've never seen anyone body like Lil Pete.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, I saw a clip of you as building seven at 9 11. The music.
Rory Rosen
Yes. Lil Pete famously was building seven and 911 musical. The tower seven. Don't give a fuck. Don't give a fuck.
Mark Gagnon
Tim Dylan loved it, right? He watched it, enjoyed it.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, it was an amazing show. We had Tim, we had Sarah Squirm and we had Marcel Hernandez and. And I mean, they were fascinated by Lil Pete. And so. So are a lot of. There are a lot of Roseanne. Huge fan.
Little Pete
Which one? Roseanne.
Rory Rosen
Roseanne Barr.
Little Pete
Oh, Roseanne Barr from.
Rory Rosen
Did you not tell you told me she watches your Instagram.
Little Pete
Oh, Rose. Rose Barker. Roseanne Barker? Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Who's that?
Little Pete
Yeah, Rose Barker. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
I don't know who that is.
Little Pete
She's a pre declarated comic.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, I don't know.
Rory Rosen
I think you're talking about Roseanne.
Little Pete
No, I was talking about Rose. Rosebud Barker.
Rory Rosen
Rosebud Baker. Rosebud Baker. Rosebud Baker.
Little Pete
Like mob beagle.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, Rosebud button is great.
Little Pete
Rose Parker.
Mark Gagnon
That's another thing I love about Pete is that he just doesn't really know any other comics. He doesn't know like, just learning now.
Little Pete
Cuz I was. Yeah, I'm just becoming. This is only like the last six months that I've been brought to the stand, you know, it's only like the last six months. Before that it was all like very entry level clubs and stuff where I was just killing her over there.
Mark Gagnon
I want to know a little bit about the strip club thing. So how long have you been going to strip clubs for?
Little Pete
I mean, I've been going to strip clubs for, for many years. But the last three years, right, it's been very much a lot because after my drug overdose in 2017, right. I went near five years without having sex. Five years. I went from, from May of 2017, right. To February of 2022 without having sex. That's. That's a huge dry spell. Yeah, I actually did a bit on it. I'll show you the bid. I did it at Eastville when I first started. Yeah, it was called no Buns. It's a great. You'll love it. It's great. Okay, so how did you break the dry spell? Okay, so I started dating this girl from Hustler. Okay. And I was taking her there every week and she was very unsexual, this girl. She was. She was not doing well with money and. And like she was very much stressing about it. She was probably gonna have to move back with her parents and stuff. But I noticed that because I was like treating her like a princess like every week. Like her friends were really starting to love me. So one week we went there, we did some Adderalls, we drank. The Adderalls wore off and I was like, fuck it, let's get some coke. Joke. I did a couple of bumps and I went in the room with her and her two friends. She didn't want to get involved in threesome. I wind up her two friends in front of her, in front of her. Well, she's dancing house music and it was, it was just wild, you know what I'm saying? And the friends were loving me. The friends were loving me. We had a great time. I don't know what the hell she was doing, but yeah, I break out of my 5 year dry spell with a threesome with the girl that I'm actually dating watching me do the whole thing.
Mark Gagnon
And she was cool it.
Little Pete
She didn't seem to give a. We left together holding hands.
Mark Gagnon
And did you guys talk about it?
Little Pete
She was just like, yeah, you didn't get laid for five years. You got to do what you got to do. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
Why didn't she break the dry spell? I don't know.
Little Pete
She was very shy. She's very. And she's the one I. I really wanted to. With her.
Mark Gagnon
Did you ever. Did you ever close a deal with her?
Little Pete
No, I never did. Wow.
Mark Gagnon
The one that got away.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Well, it's funny. When I asked Little Pete how he ended his dry spell a few days ago, he told me, well, I started doing drugs again.
Little Pete
Yeah, I'd rather do drugs and get laid than be sober and not get.
Mark Gagnon
You know. That's interesting.
Little Pete
I will take drugs and over sobriety any day.
Mark Gagnon
That is interesting. So what's the best strip club in the city?
Little Pete
Listen, I think there's a couple really good ones. Sapphire on the Upper east side. My friends are the managers over there. There's Hustler.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Yeah, there's.
Mark Gagnon
What about Pumps? You ever been to Pumps?
Little Pete
Oh, the one in Queens? No, I never been there. There. Okay, that's funny, because one of my old nicknames is Little Pumps. You know what I'm saying? If you look at my email, it's called Little Pumps 84.
Mark Gagnon
Why do they call you Little?
Little Pete
They used to call me that back. Back in the day. You know, swole. Yeah. Yeah, that's why.
Rory Rosen
Pumps iron.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, wow.
Little Pete
Yeah. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
So what makes a strip club great?
Little Pete
I think, like, when you have, like, girls that really take their sales job seriously because they're. They're sales people and they're trying to.
Mark Gagnon
Make the customer happy.
Little Pete
Yeah, that's it.
Mark Gagnon
Sometimes you go to strip club and it seems like they don't care that you're there. There.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, well, it's not that they don't care that they're. You're there. I would assume that they're sad.
Little Pete
That's possible.
Mark Gagnon
Possible.
Little Pete
You know, ones that are. Are, like, concerned with getting the clients to come back for time two and time three, because they have to give you a good night. They. They have to show you good time. Otherwise, why would you. Why would you go back, you know?
Mark Gagnon
What's your type?
Little Pete
I. I'm tech, basically more into petite, natural women. You know, the girls that I post on Instagram, they're not really my type. Although they do motivate me. Me, I. I post what the majority of people like, you know, and it seems like the fake tit, fake lip people a little. I'm an Entertainer. Yeah. I feel compelled to. To entertain and brighten up everybody's day, you know?
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, it brightens my day, bro.
Little Pete
That means the world to me. That means the world.
Mark Gagnon
But on just, you know, when Peter Francis is out on the town, you're looking for a natural woman.
Little Pete
Yeah, that's more in terms of like, if someone that I would, like, date bring home to my mother, like a more petite, natural.
Mark Gagnon
Would you bring a dancer home to your mother?
Little Pete
Oh, absolutely, if she's a good person. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
And you've done that before.
Little Pete
I haven't brought any of the girls that I've seen over the last three years post dry spell home to my mother, but I have. I have dated some strippers with good hearts. And did they all the ones that I date, that they're the kind of strippers that you could take home?
Mark Gagnon
Do they. Do you tell your mom, oh, I'm dating a stripper?
Little Pete
My mom knows that I go to strip clubs. She hates it. It. She doesn't know that, like, I've dated them, like, you know, somewhat seriously, you know, like, if I'm dating someone, I'll just tell my mother, like, oh, she's a waitress, you know.
Mark Gagnon
Does she follow your Instagram?
Little Pete
She does.
Mark Gagnon
And what does she think about the women that you post on your story?
Little Pete
My mother does not like anything about the comedy, the women I post, or anything about what it looks like the future of little Pete's life is going to look like.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, really?
Little Pete
But she loves me. You know what I'm saying? My mother has, like this vision of me is like this prestige, normal, inside the box gentleman. More wrong. She could not be.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, you're not inside the box at all.
Little Pete
Not happening. Yeah. And I tell her, I said, listen, my. You just gotta accept what is, you know, I'm saying whatever you wanted, whatever you thought was gonna happen, it's not gonna happen.
Rory Rosen
Well, Pete's relationship with the mother is beautiful. She paid for his toupee for.
Little Pete
Oh, for many years. Yeah, we. I. This past year I took it over.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, wow.
Little Pete
Yeah. She paid for. She paid for my toupee when I stopped. Yeah. When I stopped doing drugs and stopped selling drugs and I, I moved back in with her. I was broke for like two or three years before I actually started to make like, any money at my job now. And she supported me through the whole thing.
Mark Gagnon
And what's your day job now?
Little Pete
I. I'm a broker of annuities. Like, you know, like JG Wentworth.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
Where I want cash now for my annuities. I. I do that. I help people get the best price for their structure settlements. And it took me like, two or three. Yeah. Everything about me is just outside the box. I've never met anyone who does what I do.
Mark Gagnon
So someone needs cash now.
Little Pete
Now.
Mark Gagnon
And they're trying to set up their structured settlement, and they're calling. They're calling Little Pete.
Little Pete
Or I'm calling them either way. Yeah, Mostly I call them and I'm like, listen, if you're gonna sell a.
Rory Rosen
Lot of cold calling price.
Little Pete
Yeah, okay. I have so much cold calling material, it's ridiculous. I can't wait to do it in comedy, you know?
Mark Gagnon
I mean, this is wild.
Rory Rosen
It's amazing. Lil Pete is. He's a unicorn.
Little Pete
Yeah, I am a unicorn. I have a unicorn. Has to go to the bathroom. But I don't want to break this conversation.
Mark Gagnon
No, we could take a little break. We're gonna go to the bathroom.
Little Pete
Can we do a bathroom break?
Mark Gagnon
Let's do it.
Little Pete
Great.
Mark Gagnon
Ladies and gentlemen, we're back. Hey, Gabe, could we pull up the gladiator clip of. Of my good friend Peter Francis here?
Rory Rosen
I think some more comedy.
Mark Gagnon
I think this would be a good one to come back in on Paranoid.
Little Pete
About COVID Every time I come in the house, she starts taking my temperature. She wants to see my vaccine card. I'm like, relax, ma.
Rory Rosen
Ain't no covert over here.
Little Pete
I got warrior blood. All right. Like a gladiator. What did Russell Crowe say in the movie? I have come to reclaim Rome. Yeah, well, now little Peters come to reclaim Rome, baby. Yo, beautiful women be walking by me in the club. I'll be like, yo, are you not entertained?
Rory Rosen
Classic.
Little Pete
Are you not entertained?
Rory Rosen
Vintage Little Pete.
Little Pete
That's right. Laugh at the up. Oh, man.
Rory Rosen
And then the cap cut. Logo, shout out, cap cut.
Mark Gagnon
The whole thing is so funny to me, genuinely. It's like. It's not normal comedy.
Little Pete
It's not like.
Mark Gagnon
It's not like, oh, my mom's paranoid about vaccines or about COVID so she wants to see the card. Here's a funny metaphor about my mom's paranoia. It's just you being like, yo, I.
Rory Rosen
Yo, Lil Pete is Deontay Wilder, man. Lil Pete is Deontay Wilder, bro.
Little Pete
He.
Rory Rosen
He's Lil Pete. It's basically like, like, not necessarily. He's like a technical mastermind of stand up comedy, but it's just like the subjective funniness that he comes with. Just the pure funny, just the natural raw, like, it's unbelievable.
Mark Gagnon
The top comment compared to Andrew Dice Clay.
Little Pete
Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Lil Pete is. I call him Accidental Dice Clay. He's Accidental Dice clay. And I 100% see a world where people are paying for hours of Lil Pete comedy and they are saying the punchline along with him while he's saying it. That is the level of iconic that Lil Pete can reach.
Mark Gagnon
Now, Lil Pete, I have a question, random question. I ask all my guests this question. Have you ever been possessed by a demon?
Little Pete
Yeah, there actually was.
Mark Gagnon
You were possessed by a demon?
Little Pete
It was. It was in the early part of August 2015.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Okay. I was on a three day crystal meth binge.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Okay. That might have had something to do with that.
Mark Gagnon
No, I don't. Maybe.
Little Pete
And I was over my house with two people, guy and a girl, and we dropped an oxy. It went behind the refrigerator. And we were like moving the refrigerator around looking for it. We couldn't find it. They left. I started to eat the linoleum floor. That is my kitchen floor. Okay. I was eating the linoleum and I.
Mark Gagnon
Was hissing, like, how did it take?
Little Pete
Like, like absolute.
Mark Gagnon
It wasn't good.
Little Pete
It was not good linoleum. No.
Mark Gagnon
And why were you eating it? What was.
Little Pete
I don't know.
Rory Rosen
He was on crystal.
Little Pete
I don't know.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, but maybe you had a thought process like, oh, I can eat this.
Little Pete
I was just so mad that I couldn't achieve the goal and find the oxy that I. I guess, like, I thought eating linoleum was going to make me feel better.
Mark Gagnon
It didn't.
Little Pete
It did not. I. I continued to eat the linoleum and I swear to God, I saw my dead grandmother. She's been dead about a decade at this time. She's standing in the corner of my living room room. I could smell her. And she grabbed my face. I could feel her nails, like, digging in. And she's like, you've done enough damage. Get out of him. I wake up about six hours later. Okay. And I'm vomiting like crazy. And I. I read that after demonic possession, you actually vomit a lot. And. Yeah, that was basically my story of, you know, being possessed by a demon for a brief period of time.
Mark Gagnon
How do you think. How do you think the demon got into you?
Little Pete
Maybe like that third or fourth bag of crystal meth. He might have slipped his way in, you know?
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. Have you ever heard of a succubus?
Little Pete
No.
Mark Gagnon
A succubus is a. Is a sex demon that will fornicate with you in your sleep.
Little Pete
I think I get visited by those quite often, actually. I think they come like Weekly.
Rory Rosen
Little Pete. Like, I mean, when it comes to, like, they come.
Little Pete
I think they come like weekly when.
Rory Rosen
It comes to chrysal meth, I guess in demonic possession. I mean, like, like a lot of it is like energies and, and kind of frequencies that you could kind of tune into. And you know, when you, when you're doing stuff like crystal meth, it just gets your energy so like, ramped up and out of whack. It leaves you completely vulnerable to.
Mark Gagnon
You're a practitioner of the dark arts.
Rory Rosen
I wouldn't call myself a practitioner. I would just call myself a regular Jewish guy. But, but, but I, but I, but I. Evil genius. I'm curious about the dark arts. I, I, I think they're very. Because what's the thing is that people will convince you that we live in some sort of like, secular society. The rhetoric is that we live in like a secular world or that we live in like a Christian country. And, and there are a lot of Christians in the country. It's a huge part of the country. But since its founding, America has been faced based in magical thinking. Rosac, Crucians, Freemason. We know, you know, this is, this is Camp Gagnon. We know this. But like, the it to this day, it's just such a huge part of society and nobody's thinking about. But meanwhile, like Coca Cola is putting out slogans that are literally like, it's real magic. And they mean it. It's really like advertising. It borrows a lot from magical thinking. Like, I went to. Right before I got fired from my sales job, I went to a sales conference and half the people at my company practice witchcraft.
Mark Gagnon
What?
Rory Rosen
Dude, it was nuts. It was nuts. I used to work in accessibility. Like, like literally just like, like, like a, like it was like a tech company. And then half the people in the sales team, like, practice witchcraft. I, I went because we went to New Orleans for the sales conference. I went and I bought this hat that is covered in runes. And it was like a runic protection spell, like, on a hat. It was sick. And I bought the hat and I showed to my boss, yo, look at this sick, like, witch hat. Isn't this crazy? And then he just starts reading the runes. He starts going like, shifa hanatarofa hashem. And like, and I was like, yo, what? Like, what the. Rob. Shout out Rob. And then, but, and, and I mean, it's just, it's such a regular part of life and people don't really talk about it. But even regular people, like, Lil Pete's not like, necessarily Like a mystical, I mean, actually Lil Pete is one of the most mystical people.
Mark Gagnon
He's like a gnome.
Rory Rosen
It is, yeah.
Mark Gagnon
He is like a spell casting kind of like wizard.
Rory Rosen
A spell casting wizard gnome.
Mark Gagnon
Lil Pete, Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Lil Pete has, I mean he's, he's, you know, he's somebody. But, but even Lil Pete, just like a regular ass guy, like he's had demonic experiences, he's had magical experiences. A huge part of life in the modern day. People just ignore it.
Mark Gagnon
Have you ever had a magical experience? Have you ever had a paranormal experience that's unexplainable?
Rory Rosen
Yeah, I mean I had a divine, I had a divine moment with, with, with God. Like my, the first time I, I, I felt God. Like I, I cold turkey quit antidepressants. I was losing my fucking mind. And by the way, that happens to so many Americans in the country who are given prescription medication and then just go fucking off the fucking wall. Like the, like, I know a lot of people talking about mass psychosis, like Adderall prescriptions, people missing a few days in their SSRIs, like, these things are very, they add up, up, you know, So I cold turkey quit and, and I was walking actually to therapy and I don't even know. I just immediately like, I had like, just like a flash that like took over like my mind's eye and, and, and I just saw like that interconnectedness of everything and like that, that like the holy, like kind of like the, the mind of the universe and like, like I just got it. It just, it was like, it was like a moment of gnosis, like where it just like, like it's just one second, you just get it. And then, and I started crying. And then, and then I was like, I'm losing my mind. I was like, this wasn't a magical experience. I could see that I'm losing my mind. But you read into these things and, and you read like, you know, a lot of shamanic experience like, comes from like altered states of mind, like ayahuasca, stuff like that. Like a lot of those, like gnostic, like spiritual experiences do come from external substances. So it does, it makes sense as to like, why it's a, you know, it's so prevalent in American life. There was a shaman that stormed the Capitol and, and if you watch his interview with Andrew Callahan, he, he is a shaman, he practices shamanism. So it's like, it's like it, dude, it's crazy.
Mark Gagnon
What do you think? Would you ever do witchcraft to get fame and money?
Little Pete
That's a Good question. That's a good question.
Mark Gagnon
Would you make a deal with the devil?
Rory Rosen
The fact that he's thinking about it is so awesome. The fact that he's considered actually.
Little Pete
Did you? Did I? I actually did. Yeah. Well, because, like. Like I was watching an interview with Mike Tyson, and he said, like, when you're favored by God, you're favored by the devil, too. And like, when I. When I say my prayers, you know what I'm saying? Like, I. I'm asking both of them to protect me, you know what I'm saying? And I'm like, I know you guys both got dibs on me to make it one for me to be a good person, one for me to be a bad person. All right? Like, let's gamble. You know what I'm saying? Just make sure I make it. You know what I'm saying?
Rory Rosen
Lil Pete, we had a conversation that was very interesting after we went to your show at the Mary Lou, and Lil P. Was talking about how basically, if God has chosen you for greatness, then there's a war between good and evil.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Because it's in the devil's vested interest.
Little Pete
They're the ones that are responsible for the thoughts in our head, God and the devil, that. The thoughts that come into our head. Head are from them. You got the angel on your shoulder, you got the devil on your shoulder. And when I watched, like I said, I was watching an interview with Mike Tyson, like, if you're favored to make it by God, you're favored to make it by the devil too. You know I'm saying? And, like, you're gonna get power from both of them. You're gonna get power from both of them. And that. That very crazy temptation that we have, it's the free will that they've both given you, you know, and the more power you get, the more money you get, the more fame you get, the more tempted you'll be to. To roll into the dark side, because it's something that you've never experienced before, you know what I'm saying?
Rory Rosen
That's having a P. Diddy dude. Yeah, he's a huge P. Diddy fan.
Little Pete
Yeah, because he.
Mark Gagnon
Before or after the arrest?
Little Pete
No, listen, I.
Mark Gagnon
Even.
Little Pete
Even. Even after the arrest, I'm still. I'm still rooting for the guy to beat the odds. I always root for the underdog. I'm still rooting for the guy.
Mark Gagnon
But what if he's guilty? Guilty?
Little Pete
He is.
Mark Gagnon
He is.
Little Pete
He. He is. But. But his ex girlfriend, Cassie, she was a willing participant, you know?
Mark Gagnon
Well, when he beat her up, though.
Little Pete
No. Yeah. Though. That. That's not what he's being charged of, though. You know what I'm saying? He's being charged of sex trafficking. And if the person is a willing participant, it's not sex trafficking.
Mark Gagnon
Okay, but I'm listening.
Little Pete
I'm not in favor of what the guy's done. He's a bad person. He's evil. You know what I'm saying? But, like, in the court of law, is he guilty of what he's been charged of? That's what I'm saying.
Rory Rosen
Have you talked to your Harvey Weinstein lawyer about this?
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
No. He thinks Pete did. He's. He thinks Pete did. He's. You know what I'm saying?
Rory Rosen
Well, P. Diddy.
Little Pete
I mean, listen, there's probably nobody that deserves a conviction more than him, but.
Rory Rosen
I. I'll say this.
Little Pete
Is he guilty of what he's being charged of?
Mark Gagnon
But you're kind of hoping, like, the way O.J.
Little Pete
Got off, you know, I just want to see the smartest man win. You know what I'm saying? I just want to see the smartest.
Mark Gagnon
Man guilty or not.
Little Pete
Yeah. Guilty or not.
Rory Rosen
But I'll say this, though, About. About P. Diddy, is that, like, a lot of, like, the things that we see, like, unfold, like, in culture, like, today, even, like, you can look, like, through a mystical lens, because I don't think that there's even a way for you to look at Diddy and not think, like, demonic possession.
Little Pete
Definitely been infected by devil darkness.
Rory Rosen
You know, he was drinking liquid cocaine. Like. Yeah, he was drinking liquid cocaine, and he was on all sorts of drugs. There's a very famous video of. Of Diddy where he's basically in an office and he's just, you know, just slamming drawers, like, slamming the phone, and he goes, whatever I want, I will get. Whatever it is that I want, I have to get. And, like, a lot of celebrities, like.
Mark Gagnon
And you made him Israeli in that. It was not P. Diddy.
Rory Rosen
Israeli P. Diddy. I mean, Israel is, in a lot of ways, like Wakanda for pedophiles, you know?
Little Pete
Yeah, I am. I am. I am. Lucifer was the angel of Music.
Mark Gagnon
That's true.
Little Pete
They talk about that in the documentary, and they say that he basically embodied Pete Diddy as. As the angel of Music. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, I don't know. I've never seen him practice witchcraft. I mean, maybe.
Little Pete
No, he did. Before he went to trial for Shine in 2001. His bodyguard gene Deal said he drove him to the Bronx Zoo to Get a very exotic bird. And the bird was sacrificed by somebody who looked like they were into rich witchcraft.
Rory Rosen
I mean, somebody looked like someone with a tattoo.
Mark Gagnon
Definitely witchcraft.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Rory Rosen
But the. The thing is with.
Little Pete
With.
Rory Rosen
With Diddy is that like a magic, particularly Western magic, like, is. Is all about the manifestation of your will into reality where it's like, I will something. And like, that was like a big Alistair Crowley thing where it's like. Like, I. Like, it's just about making your will happen. And like. And. And you see. Actually a lot of celebrities participate in magical thinking and stuff like that. And, you know, considering the circles that P. Did. He ran in and considering his. His pure dedication of what I want, I will get what I want. Like, there's a. I would say a high likelihood of him producing magical thinking.
Little Pete
I have a bid that you guys are gonna love. I'm gonna do it on my birthday at the right side. It's called the Recurring Nightmare, okay. It's based on a true story, as all my shit is. Is. You guys are gonna love this bit. I'm gonna close out with it at my birthday party at the right side of history. You guys are gonna love this.
Rory Rosen
The last Sunday in March.
Little Pete
This is. That's my birthday. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Let me check it out right now.
Mark Gagnon
Don't pull your dick out, Pete. Okay?
Little Pete
But.
Rory Rosen
But Pete mentioned Mike Tyson, and Mike Tyson is one of the great magical practitioners of our time. Because if you look into the hypnosis element of Mike Tyson, like. Like, because a lot of sports and athletics is very magical. And because it's. There's like a ritual sacred space, like, you can consider like a basketball court to be like, okay, but has to be the same. It's very.
Little Pete
If yours is Sunday, it's the.
Rory Rosen
Oh, no, It's. It's the 23rd, I believe.
Little Pete
All right, so we'll still do the trip.
Rory Rosen
It's still your birthday. But. No, but Mike Tyson, like, a lot of it in sports, you know, because everyone's an athlete at the high level, so it's really about who can will victory.
Mark Gagnon
You truly believe.
Rory Rosen
Business, yo. Like Michael Jordan, bro.
Little Pete
You don't.
Rory Rosen
Like. Like, it just like. He just resonated with such energy that he could just like. It's about willing it. It's about making it happen. It's about having a strong will. It's about like. Michael Jordan was like, no, I'm winning. And. And that. The whole thing about him is. And. And that's. That's like the most magical thing you do. Sports are so magic.
Mark Gagnon
But why is that magic? Why is that not just like, you know, competitiveness, entrepreneurship, like trying to be.
Rory Rosen
It is, it is all those things. But, but magic, it's kind of like.
Little Pete
I think the strongest mind wins. So, so magic, I think the strongest mind will prevail. You know what I'm saying? Like, it will not accept the failure. It will not accept.
Mark Gagnon
But why is that? Why is that magic?
Rory Rosen
So the thing is about magic and you have to understand a lot of it is energetics. Yes. And like, but before there was psychology and people understood like, I guess, segments of the mind, people would externalize phenomena, you know, like not inside their mind. It's like, no, it's the outside world. And you know, you see that in religion with gods and, and, and this and that. But fuck, what was the question?
Mark Gagnon
Why is it magic?
Rory Rosen
Why is it so magic? If you think about it, it was basically like a very primitive way of interacting with the mind and like controlling the mind. And if you believe in like the mental nature of reality, which is like, oh, like, you know, you've probably heard like, oh, it feels like we live in a simulation. We do. It's our own simulation. Our brains are like universe simulators and we're running our own and we're kind of all together on this like Minecraft Land server, you know what I'm saying? So we kind of like share parts of our reality. But like, but, but you know, let's say magic. You, you don't, you don't have to think about it as woo. You can demystify magic and magic still works. It's just about like controlling the stuff that you believe and, and ritualizing things and you know, like practicing that. I mean like, there's so many useful tools that, that like help people control their psychology. It invites certain energy where it's like, okay, I'm gonna do this ritual, I'm gonna use this incense, I'm gonna do this sigil and it's gonna bring about this energy in me. And it's like a lot of it is about intentionality, you know what I'm saying? So it's actually like, you know, it's really easy to just like dismiss magic as like some woo woo. But it's like that's just how people understood the world and if you learn that language and you. You know what I'm saying? So, so whether my mom fully believes.
Mark Gagnon
This, my, like growing up, my mom would tell me that everyone in Hollywood, all these celebrities, they're all magic pract.
Rory Rosen
Well, a Lot of them are. Gisele Bunkin, Tom Brady's ex. She's openly a witch. Yoko Ono literally has a song called I'm a Witch. And the lyrics are. I'm a witch. Yes. A real witch. Yes, I'm a witch. Like, it's literally, it's. It's in. It's like they're, they're not hiding it.
Mark Gagnon
But I always assume, like, again, I grew up with this, so my, I was always a little skeptical where I was like, okay, are they really witches? You know, but like, I always assumed that they're trying to be controversial to get, you know, people fired up. Like, oh, I'm going to pretend to be Satanic and to get the, to, you know, to be rebellious and be edgy.
Rory Rosen
Well, so. So that there are a lot of different, like, elements of like, Satanism where it's like some people are just like people who grew up Christian but then like, were like molested or something. And then they're like, actually, fuck that, I'm doing whatever the opposite of that is. And they, and then actually some versions of Satanism are actually like love and acceptance and liberty oriented thinking, but they've just kind of subverted the imagery to no longer be like a battle like evil and hate. But then there are other people who are straight up just evil and demon worship and they don't care a lot of. And the thing is about a rich people. I don't know if you're familiar with the mandate of Heaven. Like, it's like this old Chinese principle where it's like the emperor. It was like, no, you were chosen to be the emperor, like, because the emperor would be like, why am I put in this, like, position of power where I reign over people? And oh, well, God put you there, there. And then he has to.
Little Pete
Rich people the same every purpose.
Rory Rosen
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
And the divine right of kings is like a similar thing.
Rory Rosen
Exactly. It's the divine right of kings. And a lot of rich people. And I, I've worked at country clubs. Like, I've had a lot of interactions with people. Like, you know, they need. They're like, oh, well, how did I end up with all this? Or like, there's got to be a reason, like, why I ended up with this. Like, the universe wanted me to be that. A lot of rich people in mystical thinking. I'm sorry, yeah, no, they say that.
Little Pete
There'S a soul plan that before you come to Earth, your soul has already agreed to the life challenge that, that you're gonna have in life. You know what I'M saying, like you're aware of all the circumstances that you could possibly be this or you could possibly be that, depending on how you choose to use your free will. You know what I'm saying?
Rory Rosen
An insane turn of events from Lil P doing crap. Very serious conversation.
Little Pete
And no, I was obviously put on earth to tell some type of a story because I really believe that everything that happened to me in my earlier part of my life had to happen to me in order for me to do this now.
Mark Gagnon
You know, I mean, so you, you had mentioned to me at one point that you were considering becoming a practitioner. Just to see. I mean, have you ever done spell casting?
Rory Rosen
I kind of try to keep it simple where I'll, I, you know, because, because I'm fucking, can I say retarded. I'm retarded. I shouldn't be fucking with high level demons or anything like that, but, but I'll try. I have like a little altar. I have like a ceremonial altar.
Mark Gagnon
This guy's a witch. Did you know he's a witch?
Rory Rosen
No, I just have an altar.
Little Pete
He's the king of the Jews.
Rory Rosen
He's an evil genius. I'm coming for the crown.
Little Pete
I'm not going anywhere without him ever.
Rory Rosen
That is 100%. Our relationship is 100% based off of. I saw L. Pete and my Jewish instinct was like, yeah, his Jewish instinct.
Little Pete
Was like, get on top of this right now. You got to bet on the stock while it's still low.
Rory Rosen
Two things I love, it's Lil Pete and young black talent. That is uns I always tell all.
Little Pete
These women, I'm like, you want to get a guy who flies on private jets, right? Well, you got to get him before he's on that private jet. Because once he's on that private jet, why the hell is he going to pick you?
Rory Rosen
But, but little he's going to take.
Little Pete
He'S going to be loyal to the woman that took the ride with him. No doubt. But now he's got his choice of anyone. Like, y'all really think you that good in bed? You know what I'm saying? Like you, you're going to get the guy with the private jet to leave his wife. Wife. Like, like you're gonna have to do some satanic black magic while you're sucking.
Mark Gagnon
His dick, you know what I'm saying?
Little Pete
To get him to just abort his family and everybody he loves.
Rory Rosen
Well, that's, that's a huge thing. The, the, the, the sex magic. I, I, we, we've talked about this before with the Sex magic. It's crazy because so a lot of it is that. So sex, the. The orgasm, right? It's like this crazy, like, moment of like, ah, like, like euphoria, like out of body, like, like. And clearly there's just this strong energy that it, it's libido. That's what it's referred to as. And, and what it does, it's one of the strongest energies that people have easy access to, right? So a lot of people will do like, sex rituals where they, like both people are like, casting a spell together while having sex. Or there's jerking off magic where you draw like a sigil on the ground and you kneel in the middle of it and then you fucking, you jerk off and you think real hard about your dreams and, and you know, and, and, and, and it's like a. It's like a lot of it. Like, it's a method of manifestation. It's. There's a lot of divination with sex. It's nuts.
Little Pete
Evil genius, dog.
Rory Rosen
But, but like evil genius. But the fun there is fun.
Little Pete
I want to get on my side, yo.
Mark Gagnon
I'm.
Rory Rosen
I'm. I'm here to protect a little. Because if I wasn't here with Little Pete, Little Pete would end up like Pete Diddy. And just like, like, if I was Little Pete, you know, they'd be surviving little Pete in 20 years from now.
Little Pete
Throwing my own freak offs, you know, if, if. Yeah, no, Me and Roy in our underwear and like. And now you're coming to the party.
Mark Gagnon
I'm not. I'm busy that day. I'm busy. I'm busy. Would you. Would you do a. Would you do a sex magic ritual?
Little Pete
Do I get late?
Mark Gagnon
I think you might just have to jerk off in a circle with Row, I think.
Rory Rosen
Well, what's crazy about the sex magic, right, is a lot of people, like, will do the sex magic. And, And I, I just went to New Orleans, so I just got a whole bunch of books about like, gay magic and, and stuff. Stuff. And seconds for the peep. Let's go. Salud. Salud.
Little Pete
The alcoholic, you know, I'm saying the Irish side of the family. St. Patty's Day Parade every year, you know what I'm saying? We're about to break out the bagpipes. And sex magic, like, Little Pete don't give a. Where's the hose at? You know what I'm saying? We about to get percolating up in this baby.
Rory Rosen
So. So a lot of sex magic. It's about edging and extending your Orgasm and just edging so that you can have like a orgasm like a pig that like lasts like multiple minutes. And you're just like maintaining the orgasm and you're like. And that's when the, you can, you know, divinate. And then there are a lot of people that'll have sex and they'll be like, oh, I just summoned fucking Hermes. Now Hermes is fucking you and you're fucking Demeter. And now we're Hermes. And, and so it's like, if you think of orgasm is like cool, you know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
I think it's cool.
Rory Rosen
So imagine you're orgasming, but now you're also like, oh my God. Oh, I'm manifesting all my dreams in reality. Oh, and also I'm possessed by God. Oh, and then the girl sitting there and she's like, oh, I'm possessed by a goddess too. Oh, and also all my dreams are also becoming real. It's like just like a next level. Like these people are, I mean, God bless them, you know what I'm saying? But these people are crazy. These people are nuts.
Mark Gagnon
This is a real thing that happened.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, I, I, I.
Mark Gagnon
Do you know anyone that done, that's done this?
Rory Rosen
I have a really funny story from right when I comedy that there, there's a comedian.
Little Pete
When did you start comedy, Roy? What year?
Rory Rosen
I did, I started comedy in, in the Pandemic. My, my first 2020. Yeah, my, my first open mic I did right before I got kicked out of my parents house.
Little Pete
And, and I did my first open mic right before it closed down. For the Pandemic too. Yeah, I actually did Gladys's comedy hour at the Comic Strip.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, nice.
Little Pete
Yeah, and it was funny because we went out for drinks after, right? And I was talking about the hair piece and everything. And later on that night, one of her friends texted me. She's like, can you do a spot on the Friday night pro show? I'm like, yeah, of course. She goes, but listen, Gladys thinks it's really funny that you take such good care of your toupee. She wants you to do a bid just on the toupee. This is the first time I ever wrote comedy in my life. Went there on St Patty's Day 2020, doing a bit about the toupee. Crushed it. Wound up hooking up with some Colombian chick. We went to some after hours spot. Me and her were getting busy on the dance floor and I'm like, yo, I want to be a motherfucking comedian. Comedian, okay. Changing my whole plan right now.
Mark Gagnon
That was it.
Little Pete
I want. I'm. I want to be a comedian. It. This set my soul on fire. You know what I'm saying? Like. Like Lucifer and God burning it at the same time. I'm like, this is the path I'm gonna walk. I will walk this path. I don't give a what comes with it. I will deal with it when it's in front of me.
Rory Rosen
I said this before. God chose Lil ping laughter to the people and so did say, they got dipped.
Mark Gagnon
Satan. All right.
Little Pete
No, they got dibs on me.
Mark Gagnon
I'm telling you, you gotta reject sa.
Rory Rosen
Satan if I'm Satan. I'm trying to draft this guy so fast.
Little Pete
They both want me on that team.
Rory Rosen
You know, they're bidding.
Little Pete
One's like, yo, I got the over here. One's like, I got heaven over here. And I'm like, where's the at? I'm like, that is on fire.
Mark Gagnon
You gotta be on the straight narrow.
Rory Rosen
You gotta go to the antihero, bro. He's shadow the hedgehog.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. Wait, but what happened with your. This story? The sex magic story?
Rory Rosen
Oh, well, what was the story? The sex magic? Well, sex is like just what it can do to your energy is crazy. Actually. Speak. I mentioned sports and magic as well. The. They say that Michael Jordan, like, in. In that playoff run, like, that run, he was fucking like four or five girls a night. You know what I'm saying? And, like, just the amount of libido that. That, like, will summon up in you. And you're just like you. Because you. You fuck like four girls and you're like, yo, I'm the fucking man. I'm the fucking man. And it juices you up and it kind of like Mike Tyson hypnotizes you into being like, I'm the man. I'm gonna make this happen. I'm unwavering in my will. And blah, blah, blah. I don't remember what the story is. The. But no, these people are. But I'd say it's. Oh, open mic. It was the open mic when I started comedy. This comedian, funny guy Isaiah Mueller, is doing a. A bit on stage that nobody knows what he's talking about because he's talking about sigil magic, which is when you draw, like a symbol of some sort of entity, you know, maybe on the ground or you could do it. There's actually something called glam magic where you do it in your makeup and then you. And then you. Anyway, but that's not relevant. But he basically, he was like, yo, I'm. I'm unemployed, I'm broke. I couldn't find a job. And, and I'm like a magical guy. So I've been doing like a lot of sigil magic to try to find a job. And, and the way that masturbation he's doing, he's talking about how he's doing masturbation magic, basically, where basically you take a sigil, you kneel in the middle of it, you take whatever it is that you're trying to manifest. Like you have like a print of it or maybe, I don't know, maybe you pull it up on your phone, whatever it is, and you look at the goal that you're trying to achieve and you jerk off. And then you're supposed to like, come on it to like a sold out weekend. Because if you think about it, what it is, yeah, it's like a sold out weekend. And it's basically like you're just visualizing it and infusing that and that, that thought with so much energy that comes from your libido energy can and your sex energy cannon and the fucking. And you're jerking off. So, so he, this guy printed out job applications and he's fucking in a sigil, jerking off to job applications, like.
Mark Gagnon
To LinkedIn or something.
Rory Rosen
Yeah. And, and he, he, he saw one on for the Museum of Ice Cream and he, and he fucking, like in his bust on the application of the Museum of Ice Cream, show him the.
Little Pete
Picture from the first night that we were posing when I did the Right side of history.
Rory Rosen
Oh, yo, yo.
Little Pete
And you were like, yo, little Pete has crazy. Little Pete has crazy small nipples, yo.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, Lupit does have crazy small steroid nipples.
Mark Gagnon
Wait, hold on. What happened with the second?
Rory Rosen
So what ended up happening? He, so he's, he's doing this bit where he's explaining this and he, and he's like, yo. And then I got hired at the Museum of Ice Cream. And at the Museum of Ice Cream everyone has like their own, like ice, like there's like, everyone has an ice cream nickname. So there's like Java Chip and like Strawberry and you know, I mean, and that's how they refer to each other on the job. And he was talking about how his name was Froyo and the bit was like, I don't think they would have named me that if they knew how I got this job and I was the only one in the room who got it. I'm fucking crying, laughing. He's the only person. And I know. And I've also met a BDSM practice like Dominatrix who? There's a lot of magic in BDSM dominatrix stuff as well.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, this is.
Rory Rosen
She's a sex witch. Dude, there's so many sex witches. This is New York City, bro. This is where the sex witches live. It's. It's them and the Orthodox Jews. This is the most magical place on the planet.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, do you think you've ever had sex with a. With a sex magician?
Little Pete
Oh, I actually dated a BDSM worker for like a year.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, wow. Did she. Did she tie you up?
Little Pete
Yeah, she did.
Mark Gagnon
Did you like it?
Little Pete
Yeah, I did. And you know what? She was like, our safety word is cat. And while I'm tied up, I'm like, cat, cat. She goes, no, purr for me, cat. Purr for me, cat.
Mark Gagnon
And what. What does she do to you?
Little Pete
No, she just, like, tied me up and, like, sat on my face and stuff. She didn't really get too crazy with it. She was like, you're a good person. I can't hurt you. She's like, I've heard a lot of other people. She's like, but I. I can't see myself doing it to you.
Mark Gagnon
She's hurt other people.
Little Pete
That's what she said. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Do you know what she did?
Little Pete
No, I didn' with her. This is going back to 2011. Yeah. She was a. She was a full fledged dominatrix. Very successful, very successful in an industry. We met at a club called Mansion and she really liked me, you know, she really, really liked me. Yeah, she moved out to la. That's why we stopped seeing each other.
Rory Rosen
Who wouldn't?
Mark Gagnon
Who wouldn't?
Little Pete
She. She used to, like, just tie me up and sit in my face and, like, come my face and, you know.
Mark Gagnon
She didn't get coming in your face.
Little Pete
She used to come in my face. Yeah. And she'd be like, purr for me. Perfume me, cat, while she's coming in my face.
Mark Gagnon
What? Little Pete, what do you think is the gayest thing you ever did?
Little Pete
I've gotten a finger up my ass from the doggy style position.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
While I'm eating another girl out.
Mark Gagnon
From. From a woman.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, that's great.
Rory Rosen
Question mark.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, I mean, how. How? Like a knuckle, you think?
Little Pete
No, like. Like two fingers.
Mark Gagnon
Probably two. I mean, that's why.
Little Pete
Yeah. I've gotten. I've gotten two fingers up my ass in the doggy style position. Eating the other girl out. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Tell me when.
Little Pete
Stop, wait. And keep in mind, I'm coked. The up Right now. So it could have been three fingers. I would have been like, yo, keep going, you know?
Rory Rosen
Wait, right now.
Little Pete
No, this is like.
Rory Rosen
Or when you were.
Little Pete
No, this is. You're looking for the time frame on this when you're.
Rory Rosen
Are you coked up now or in the store?
Little Pete
No, in the story. In the story, I actually started throwing my ass into her fingers. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, that's way G than I expected. So you were. You had that thing tooted up. You were right.
Little Pete
I was throwing my ass into her fingers while I'm eating the other girl out.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. And so you're saying like, like, full. Full finger, you think?
Little Pete
Oh, absolutely. Like. Like. Like hitting, like, pop, pop, pop, pop.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, it's going in and out.
Little Pete
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Did. Did you. Did you reach the moment?
Little Pete
Oh, yeah, absolutely. I. I came while she was jerking me off and eating the other girl out at the same time.
Mark Gagnon
Pete, this is insane.
Little Pete
Yeah, I'm a crazy wild dud to.
Rory Rosen
Ask you the same question, but I don't want to ruin your reputation, listeners.
Mark Gagnon
No, the greatest thing I ever did is I. I. I kissed a guy to bring him back to life.
Little Pete
Oh. I also got blown by. I got blown by a. I didn't realize that it was a until after she blew me. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
Okay. And how'd you feel about that?
Little Pete
When she put her hand on mine and I realized that it was.
Mark Gagnon
It was a perfect match.
Little Pete
Yeah. Yeah. I was like, oh, man. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
But would you. Would you have.
Rory Rosen
As Lupit's Jew. The official public stance of Lil Pete on this issue is that he has absolutely zero qualms with her sexuality but is upset that she's trying to trick him.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Yeah.
Little Pete
So the whole time I was getting blown. You know what I was thinking?
Mark Gagnon
If she.
Little Pete
Must be my lucky day. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
If she. If she had told you before, like.
Little Pete
Oh, I'm a trans, I wouldn't have done it.
Mark Gagnon
You wouldn't have.
Little Pete
I wouldn't have done it even.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, the mouth, though, That's. That's a woman.
Little Pete
Yeah. No, I probably wouldn't have, you know, like. But even to this day, I still jerk off to the part before I realized that she was.
Rory Rosen
Let's go.
Little Pete
I was like, lucky day. Must be my lucky day, man. My boy was pissed. He's like, you always get all the good ones. I'm like, what am I gonna say?
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, right. Did you tell him afterwards, like, oh, I think that was a trans woman.
Little Pete
No.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
That was our little.
Rory Rosen
You know. There's a song about this, you know, Skepta.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, yeah.
Rory Rosen
So, yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Women in Disguise.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, disguise.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Rory Rosen
The tune of Transformers theme song.
Mark Gagnon
I've heard the song. It's a fabulous song about Amsterdam. Yeah, it's an unbelievable song.
Rory Rosen
Yeah. I'm not going to quote it, but everyone that's listening should look up. Disguised by Skepta.
Little Pete
It's one more bathroom break.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, absolutely. Anything you need, anything you need. We're going to go to the bathroom. We'll be right back. What's up, guys? We're going to take a break really quick because I need to tell you about how you are potentially entitled for some compensation. That's right. You may have been injured without even knowing it. And I think statistically, most Americans have been injured by this. We know that our food is poison. Many of these companies, these massive conglomerates, are pumping our food with stabilizers and gums and other processed chemicals that are legal in most other countries. But for some reason in America, they are fully legal and they are allegedly causing many health problems. That's a very small alleged. I actually just read a book about this. Ultra processed humans. It's fascinating that the processed chemicals that are going into our foods are terrible for you. I mean, if you were to take a baked cookie and a cookie that's filled with processed preservatives, even if they have the same exact nutritional profile, while the one with the preservatives and all the gums and stabilizers and ultra processing chemicals is going to be worse for you by a far, far margin. So if you have been exposed to many of these ultra processed foods, they've been known to be addictive, they've been known to CR to target children, and they can potentially cause chronic diseases such as type 2 diabetes, fat fatty liver disease, both of which were unheard of 40 years ago, but now affect the lives of thousands of children. Children. It looks like the people over at Morgan and Morgan are fighting for the people once again. That's right. Morgan and Morgan, America's largest law firm. I mean, they have, you know, handled thousands and thousands of cases, recovered billions of dollars for their clients, and now they are targeting the ultra processed food giants of the world. Okay? So if you or your child has been diagnosed with one of these diseases that I mentioned before, you may have legal options. They have helped thousands of families seek justice against these big corporations and they are ready to fight for you as well. If you are interested, go to. For the people.com Gagnon. That's right. That is f o r the people.com Gagnon. If you're interested in potentially hearing more about the way that these companies can be affecting you and your health and the health of your family and how you may be entitled for compensation because of that, now I do have to disclose. This is a paid advertisement. Now let's get back to the show. What's up, guys? We're going to take a break really quick because I got to tell you about an amazing service known as Bluejack. That's right. Bluechew is a service that basically delivers this chewable tablet to your door whenever you want, once a week, once a month. I don't even know if they could do it that frequently, but they'll send it right to your door. You don't have to go to the doctor and have some awkward conversation with some guy in a lab coat. Some dude that's judging you, probably, if I had to guess, with Bluechew, it's super discreet. The packaging is discreet. It's just a couple questions on their website. And they will send you chewable tablets that have basically the same active ingredients as like, a Viagra or a CF Alice, but at the fraction of the cost and in a chewable form. It's great. It truly is. I mean, one time I was in the woods and we were cold, and everyone. It was raining, and I. I pitched a tent with the. The help of Bluechew, and everyone gathered under it, and we were safe. And it saved me and a lot of. A lot of lonely people. So if you're interested in Bluechew, here's how you get it. You're going to go to bluechew.com and use the promo code. Get Gagnon. That's right. G, A, G, N, O, N. It's kind of funny. Gagnon has the promo code. I don't know why exactly, but it is funny. And you're going to receive your first month for free. That's right. Bluechew.com use the promo code. Gagnon. Check it out. Bluechew. Let's get back to the show. And we're back. Maybe let's just kick it off with another little P clip, shall we?
Little Pete
Yeah, yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Gabe, could you just pull. Pull one of these up? What's one?
Little Pete
Try the Boston Marathon. I think you're going to like that. It's the second to the last. I think you guys are gonna like this.
Mark Gagnon
Okay, let's check it out.
Little Pete
The work went sideways. The client was refusing to cooperate with my Company. So I had to drive to Boston so I could see the man in person in an attempt to try to talk him off the fence. When I got to the man's house, he wasn't home. He was in the hospital with his daughter. I spent the entire day in Boston waiting for this man to get home. I took a in McDonald's. I took a in Burger King. I took a in Subway.
Mark Gagnon
Okay?
Little Pete
And I took the biggest dump of my life in Mickey's Tavern. It was the biggest bomb they seen since the Boston Marathon. Y'all was dropping bombs on all day. I must have been a terrorist in another life, man. Yo, I dropped so many bombs in Boston that day. The government got me on a federal watch list now. That's right, the FBI, they got a picture of little Pete on the wall next to Osama bin Laden and Jahani. John.
Rory Rosen
That was me. That's me. Yeah. I came to a little piece.
Little Pete
You know, I'm going to be back at the comedy shop on February 16th, right? Sunday, Febr 16th, 8pm I'm gonna be back. I got some great new material, man. Oh, man, I can't wait to do it.
Mark Gagnon
Now, Pete, I just wanted to ask you, and I hope this isn't controversial, Okay. I hope this doesn't. This doesn't offend you. I notice you have a little scar here.
Little Pete
Yes.
Mark Gagnon
What is that from?
Little Pete
Okay. Labor Day weekend, 2014. I got jumped.
Mark Gagnon
Whoa.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
What happened?
Little Pete
Got jumped. He say Share say type of. I walked into an ambush bush and I had three guys attacking me. Who.
Mark Gagnon
Who ambushed you? Why was. Why was someone ambushing?
Little Pete
Hearsay sure say type of stuff. Okay, here's a sure say without getting into a crazy long story.
Mark Gagnon
Okay, Here's a shoe.
Little Pete
My life was on the line and I fought back.
Mark Gagnon
Where was. This is in Bay Ridge.
Little Pete
It was actually. It was a marine park.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Okay. I fought back and, you know, I started going crazy fighting three people at once. And thank God, you know, I got out of that apartment alive and I checked myself into the hospital. I needed like three or four stitches.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
And. Yeah, that was basically it.
Mark Gagnon
Whoa.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, they got you pretty bad. They tuned you.
Little Pete
I got them good, too. I got them good, too.
Mark Gagnon
It was a three on one.
Little Pete
It was a three on one. But like, like when I. When I lose my mind, like, bro, it's like a whole lot.
Mark Gagnon
Were these guys geriatric or. They were younger.
Little Pete
No. And they. They were gangster dudes, bro. They were gangster dudes. One of them was going to shock me in a tub he actually went to do a shot of heroin. He nodded out. I took a. He took a knife off the kitchen table. I slashed one of them with the knife. What the. He started screaming like, oh, my God, I'm. I'm hit. I'm hit. And then I just ran out of the apartment, man.
Mark Gagnon
Whoa.
Rory Rosen
You think a lot of cops watch this show?
Mark Gagnon
Probably some. Probably some. But this, this case is closed though, right? Like this?
Little Pete
Yeah. No, nothing ever came of it.
Rory Rosen
No, it's all. It's not. None real.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, it's all completely fictitious. It's like a made up story.
Little Pete
Yeah, exactly. Made up story. Yeah. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
I mean, this is. That's pretty.
Little Pete
But I took a. A huge shot in the face with a brass knuckle. It totally split my lip open.
Mark Gagnon
Whoa.
Little Pete
I was. I was tased. I did not go down. They tasted. I pissed myself on myself.
Mark Gagnon
Dropped another bomb.
Little Pete
Yeah, I dropped another bomb. I. I didn't go down. Thank God. The guy that did it to me nodded himself the out. And when I. When I took the knife and slashed the other guy. Guy, he screamed like a little, ran away. The other guy got scared and I just. I just ran out of the house. I ran right into a cab.
Mark Gagnon
Whoa. I mean, that's a pretty crazy story. I mean that's. That's wild. And so when, when did you stop selling drugs?
Little Pete
In 2017. After the drug overdose, after the life saving surgery, after the coma. I realized to myself that if I continue to sell drugs that I was never going to get off the opiates. I was never going to get off the heroin.
Mark Gagnon
Can't get clean.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
When you're around.
Little Pete
Yeah. So I stopped and I was totally broke. I was broke. I had no money. Moved back from Florida because I was living on my own in Florida at the time. Palm Beach Gardens.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Moved back in with my mother.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
Shout out to Palm beach, baby. I'm coming back there one day. And my mom had said to me, she's like, listen, if you just get your life together, you stop doing drugs. Excuse me. I'll support you for the time being. You know, My best friend got me a sales job, which is the job that I have now to this day. It literally took me like two years to just, you know, get back in the game. Like making cold calls, building up my clientele. Yeah, all of that. Yeah. I was 20, 17, 18, 19, very rough years of my life. I was broke, just kind of like going to the gym, going to work, going home. Home. I went on a couple of dates here and There, but nothing really came of it, you know, and dry spell.
Mark Gagnon
It was a dry spell.
Little Pete
A huge dry spell. But realistically, I feel like I needed it because, like, the alone time actually made me stronger.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
You know, and, you know, like I said, I did. I did the first open mic right before the pandemic. Pandemic hit. Pushed me back another year and a half. But when I started the comedy at the end of 2021, I was ready for it. I was. I was ready to come out and, like, start, you know, and if it had happened before this, you might have not got the same, like, confident. I don't give a version of little Pete, you know what I'm saying? Because the strength that I have now, it was actually built through those five years of isolation. And no, you know, nothing makes every man. Nothing makes you. Realistically, nothing makes you stronger than not getting. You know what I'm saying? Nothing makes you stronger, you know what I'm saying? Saying, like, if you ask Mike Tyson or 50 or any of those dudes, their strength was built through the periods of time when they were, like, in jail or in the hospital. And not getting.
Mark Gagnon
You got to refocus yourself now.
Little Pete
Now, when I look a woman in the face, I look her in the face, and the look says, like, yo, I'll do another five years and no standing on my head. I don't need you in my life.
Mark Gagnon
You know what I'm saying? That's power.
Little Pete
That's exactly when they drop your. When they drop their parents, when you truly look them in the face with the I don't need you type of. I don't give a. Type of.
Mark Gagnon
Well, Pete don't give a. I'm gonna.
Little Pete
Tell my story exactly the way it happened. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
Would you ever have a drug deal go sideways?
Little Pete
A drug deal go sideways? When I was 18 years old, like, the first time I actually tried to sell drugs, I.
Mark Gagnon
Selling weed.
Little Pete
Oh, Ecstasy, a G pack.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
I got robbed with a gun to my head. They. They took the whole G pack.
Rory Rosen
Were you high?
Little Pete
No, I was. And hi. Except for the $100 that got stuck in my pocket, they took the whole everything, you know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
So what happened? Like, you just met these guys at a thing.
Little Pete
Somebody actually set me up. Somebody actually set me up. And it was somebody who I knew. And, yeah, he was like, yeah, it's my boy. He's going to take care of you. They got the G packet. E for you. Just bring the 6,500. And they put the guns in my head. I get. I was 18 years old. I gave it to them really quickly.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
Of course, the 6400. A hundred dollars got stuck in my pocket. They. They put the gun to my head and everything. I coughed it up, up real quick.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, of course. You don't want to deal with that. If someone. Someone robs me, I'm just gonna be like, yeah, you got it.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
What's more valuable than your life? You know what I'm saying?
Little Pete
Can I get one of those pills for that? Can I get one? Let me just keep 100 bucks and get high. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. When was the first time you did eat?
Little Pete
Oh, I was. It was Labor Day weekend, 2002. Yeah. It was so funny. My memory's great. So I'm tripping balls, right? I go up to my boy's room and I put on a porno. I start jerking off. My boy comes in the room and he's like, oh, it's all right. I'll jerk off with you. I love watching Porto too. I'm like, no, it's all right. You don't have to jerk off with me. He goes, nah, you're my boy. I'll jerk off with you. You know what I'm saying? He's like, we're boys. We'll jerk off together. We'll do everything together. You know what I'm saying? And he knew all the porno chicks names just like I did, man.
Rory Rosen
Remember the good old days when people used to live one time?
Little Pete
2002. This is a couple weeks later, right? We went to this club called Central Club.
Mark Gagnon
Hang on. I just. I want to just circle back. Did you both complete watching the porno together?
Little Pete
We did not know. You can't bust when you're on ecstasy. You can't bust it.
Mark Gagnon
You guys are both on E. Jerking off together watching porn?
Little Pete
Yeah. Correct.
Mark Gagnon
How long?
Rory Rosen
That's the gayest thing.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. So when I asked the gayest thing.
Little Pete
You ever did, I didn't consider this gay at all.
Mark Gagnon
It's just kind of brotherly bonding.
Little Pete
Exactly.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. Yeah.
Little Pete
I mean, I'll jerk off at all my friends.
Mark Gagnon
You Would you do that with Rowie?
Little Pete
Absolutely. I told Rowie the other day, coming home from. From your comic comedy show, I said, I will absolutely do a demo with you, bro. You know what I'm saying? You want one and me on the other end. And. And there's no closer Brother Bond than doing a demo with a demo. Yeah.
Rory Rosen
What's a demo?
Little Pete
Like Train Running A train. Running. Oh, yeah, Running train. Because one thing I've noticed, right, I've done a lot of threesomes in my life. I've done a lot of threesomes, right? I've done threesomes with two guys and a girl. And I've done threesomes with two girls and a guy, right?
Mark Gagnon
You ever done threesome with three eyes?
Little Pete
No, absolutely not.
Mark Gagnon
I'm just curious.
Little Pete
When you're doing a threesome with two girls, right? Here's what happens, right? You're gonna connect to one girl more than the other, and eventually the one that you connect to less is gonna start to get in the way. But when you're doing a real threesome with one of your bro skis, it's the most fun you've ever had in your life. You're high fiving each other on the flip side, you know what I'm saying? And y'all, y'all just having a great time. You on one end, me on the other end. No jealousy, all love. We're having a great time tonight. We're having a great memory that we could look back on with the girls. It's totally different. Like, one girl goes to the bathroom, she's hating on her. She comes back, the other one goes to the bathroom, she's hating on her. Like, I don't hate on my boys. I want to see all my boys live. I want to see all my boys making.
Mark Gagnon
What if your boy's got a bigger piece than you?
Little Pete
No, that's okay. You know what I'm saying? Like, it's all good.
Mark Gagnon
Has that ever happened?
Little Pete
Oh, absolutely. One of the. One of my friends that I did a demo with, this guy must have had a 10 incher, bro, you know what I'm saying? Like. Like we were the chick and he pulled down his pants, she looked at his dick, and she goes, yo, let him do it. You know what I'm saying? And I'm like, you mean let him do it. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
And. But you were cool with that because you want to see your boy, you.
Little Pete
Want him to do it, let him do it. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
And you just watched for a little.
Little Pete
Yeah, absolutely.
Rory Rosen
L. Pete is offered every time. Every time Lil Pete has come and done right side of history. Every single time he's offered that we go to the strip club after the show.
Little Pete
Remember I was bothering Ricky Velez? Remember how much I was bothered him that day? And he's like, I got to go home to my kids. I'm like, all right, don't worry about it, yo. Yeah, yeah.
Rory Rosen
Little Pete was giving the business to Ricky Velez.
Little Pete
I was like, come to hustle with me, man.
Mark Gagnon
But he was. He was. He was busy. Yeah.
Rory Rosen
I mean, he just doesn't know how to have fun.
Little Pete
Every time I go to right side, I'm like, yo, who's coming to the strip club with me after? Who's parlaying?
Rory Rosen
And, you know, it's funny. Every single time, nobody goes to L.
Little Pete
I go by myself.
Mark Gagnon
It's going to be a whole thing, right? You go to the street club with Little Pete, one thing leads to another, and then you're getting a demo run on you by Pete and his boy. You know what I mean? Like, you don't want to. You don't want to. That's sketchy, right?
Little Pete
He did. He's coming through.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
He's gonna slip you a Pete Diddy with the twist, the lime, and then y'all getting a shot of come on the rocks.
Rory Rosen
Oh, my God.
Mark Gagnon
You ever. You ever do a four? A foursome?
Little Pete
A foursome? No. Threesome was the most I ever did. Oh, I've done three girls and me, where one girl didn't participate. Oh, that's right. That's right. But never an actual. Never actual four part.
Mark Gagnon
Would you ever be in an open relationship?
Little Pete
Oh, yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Like. Like, if you were dating a girl and she was like, hey, let's just, you know, be open. You.
Little Pete
I'm kind of doing one of those right now, actually. Really? Yeah. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
And if she hooks up with a guy, you're not jealous?
Little Pete
Well, she works at one of the strip clubs, so if she hooks up with a guy, it's just business.
Mark Gagnon
You're cool with that?
Little Pete
I'm cool with that.
Mark Gagnon
Now, what if she's like, oh, I want to, like, maybe date another guy?
Little Pete
That would hurt me.
Mark Gagnon
That would be a little.
Little Pete
That would hurt my heart.
Mark Gagnon
That'd be a little tough.
Little Pete
Yeah, that would hurt my.
Mark Gagnon
But if she's like, let's bring him in and we can all live together, like, we're all.
Rory Rosen
That's like an onision situation. That's never good.
Little Pete
Yeah, no, no. The. The living would. Would bother me. You know what I'm saying? But if it was for one night and it was just business, I understand. You know, I understand that. That it's a cold world when it comes to money, and people got to do what they got to do.
Mark Gagnon
You know, what if you want to bring another girl in and.
Little Pete
Oh, we've done that. We've Done that.
Mark Gagnon
And you guys all date each other.
Little Pete
Well, not date. It's. It's for the night. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
But what if it was a date situation? She lives with y'all.
Little Pete
That's weird. That's weird.
Mark Gagnon
You know what I'm saying? Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Do you know the story about the. There was a. On tlc, they did, like, an episode of. I don't remember what other shows, but about, like, this polycule couple that was, like, this one girl and a bunch of guys. Guys. And they all. I don't. I don't know if any of them were publicly furries, but they all kind of dressed like they were furries. You know what I'm saying? Like, the. The highlight in the hair and the. And they. They did an episode about them because the newest boyfriend got her pregnant.
Mark Gagnon
Oh.
Rory Rosen
So then all of the older boyfriends were like, yo, what? Like, we've been putting our time in, like, you know what I mean? They felt, like, kind of entitled to the baby, swoops in last minute, gets her pregnant. And they did a whole episode about that. And there was one guy that was just clearly just like, yeah, it's great. And, like. But so this was crazy. That guy. You can look this up in the news. That guy ended up murdering the baby. Yeah. He ended up getting arrested. He murdered, like, the baby and, like, violently, like, attacked the polycule.
Mark Gagnon
What?
Rory Rosen
Yes.
Mark Gagnon
What the.
Rory Rosen
I mean, the new guy got his lady pregnant.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, man, That's a little. It's a little up. I don't. I don't know.
Rory Rosen
You could go watch it on tlc. It's crazy.
Mark Gagnon
Would you. Would you ever be with a furry?
Little Pete
What is a furry, exactly?
Mark Gagnon
Can we pull up a picture of a furry?
Rory Rosen
Yeah, we have to show Little Pete what a furry is.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, a furry is a. It's basically like a. Maybe a lifestyle. Yeah. So basically it's a lifestyle of people that sort of have these altars, you know, these alternative.
Rory Rosen
It's called the fursona.
Mark Gagnon
But what if she was.
Rory Rosen
No, there are really hot furries now, Lil Pete. There are some really hot.
Little Pete
Is it an ass lick? Furry?
Mark Gagnon
I mean, it could be. If you wanted.
Little Pete
It could be.
Rory Rosen
Then maybe, you know, maybe.
Little Pete
But you would have only an ass lick.
Mark Gagnon
You would have to have a. A fursona, though. You would have to be like, can we click on.
Little Pete
This is not going to help the little P Character, this furry Persona.
Rory Rosen
No, furries are actually. I think it's one of the healthiest ways to deal with being well.
Little Pete
Then I Should I should. Being a Furry at the next right.
Rory Rosen
Side of history, that would be so fucking awesome.
Little Pete
I'll be with the leather jacket, yo. Come on with the leather jacket. I'm going like, yo, furry don't give.
Mark Gagnon
A. Yeah, he doesn't, bro.
Little Pete
Birthday show. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, I mean, it's just a whole lifestyle crazy with this.
Little Pete
Yes, sir. We about to take it to the next level. God, Devil. Y'all better watch out for my faith in both of you.
Rory Rosen
Wait, can we search hot furries? Yeah, because there are actually. I. I think I can switch Lupita on this. And. And they have, like, a. A fun little culture, you know what I'm saying? They, like, hang out. They have, like, games night. I've been. I've been the past, like, three weeks. I've been honestly, like, pretty obsessed with listening to music that's made by furries for furries.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, really?
Rory Rosen
There are some bangers, dude, you're also.
Little Pete
A very unique guy yourself, bro. You're also a very unique guy, bro. You know what I'm saying? You're the opposite end of me, but you are a very unique guy.
Rory Rosen
Look at that one. What about that one, bro?
Little Pete
I will lick her armpits. I have a huge armpit, by the way.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, well, you have an armpit.
Little Pete
Yeah, I do. I. Every. Every girl that I. For the last 20 years, I lick their armpits.
Mark Gagnon
Wait, hold. Oh, wait. What?
Little Pete
I have a huge armpit fetish, okay? I. I am an armpit licker, okay? Any girl that fucks me, you're getting your armpit slicked.
Mark Gagnon
Can we pull up some armpit? Maybe some armpit pictures and just maybe peek and explain why? What do you.
Little Pete
I. I've been looking at girls. Oh, man. Especially the hairy ones.
Rory Rosen
Sorry, I don't want to break your shit.
Little Pete
Give me my drink. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
Wait, so what is it?
Little Pete
So, yeah, every stripper that we've talked about has gotten their armpits licked.
Mark Gagnon
And how do you bring it up to them?
Little Pete
I just do it.
Mark Gagnon
You just do it?
Little Pete
I just do it. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
And are they surprised?
Little Pete
Usually they just laugh.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
I also make them lick mine, too.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, because you like getting your armpit lick?
Little Pete
Yeah, I do. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Because it's kind of ticklish.
Little Pete
I do. Yeah. And if you notice, right? If you want to bring up my. My Instagram story from Christmas. Right, the Christmas one.
Mark Gagnon
I don't know if we have that technolog.
Little Pete
Show it to you guys if you like. And I said for Every stripper that I've crossed paths with over the last few years for you will never forget the nights that you spent with little Peep, because I. I blow these women's minds.
Mark Gagnon
Does it ever smell like when you.
Little Pete
I love that. Okay, I. I like. Yo, before we even start, go wipe the deodorant off, okay? Because we're doing this the way the cavemen did it.
Mark Gagnon
You like it stinky.
Little Pete
I do. I love it.
Mark Gagnon
And when did you find out that you like this?
Little Pete
20 years ago.
Mark Gagnon
20 years ago. Just as a young man exploring your sexuality.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Okay. And can we just maybe pull up? Like, I'm sure there's, like, a subreddit dedicated to armpits.
Little Pete
Yeah, that one with the hairy armpits. Like, I will.
Rory Rosen
What did you say to. What did you say to Ivy?
Little Pete
I would bite her armpit hairs and pull them out my teeth.
Rory Rosen
She won't. Well, so. So we had.
Little Pete
We.
Rory Rosen
We ran, like, a dating show script at the right side of history. We do a sketch at the end of every. Every show, and we had Lil Pete participate as a contestant on a dating show to win Ivy's heart.
Little Pete
No, no, no.
Mark Gagnon
Just say yes. I'm over 18. Go back. It gives you two options.
Rory Rosen
And then we. You know Adam Gilbert. Yeah, Adam Gilbert. He was littler Pete that night Lil Pete proposed. And then Adam Gilbert goes. Yo, what are you doing with my ex?
Mark Gagnon
Okay, so go. Just go to the main page of this.
Rory Rosen
What is the name of the subreddit?
Mark Gagnon
It's called Armpit fetish. It has 356,000 members. And go to the. I guess not the only one, evidently.
Little Pete
Wow.
Mark Gagnon
And now go to the sort feature. Okay. And. And go by top of all time. And let's just see kind of what, like, go to. Go to today. You're going to see today right there. And we're going to go top all time. God, all time at the bottom. And. Yeah, let's just peruse some of these and just see maybe if any of these are.
Little Pete
Oh, yeah. I got to smell it, though.
Rory Rosen
Yeah. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
And so if it smells too good, what's. That's a. That's a problem.
Little Pete
No, I mean, listen, I'll. I'll just tell, like, can you please go wipe the deodorant?
Rory Rosen
Vagina, Dude.
Mark Gagnon
It's fine. We. We'll edit this out. We'll blur it. We'll blur it. And so you like the hair?
Little Pete
I. I. Yes, I do.
Mark Gagnon
And what if it smells like. Right guard.
Little Pete
I'm a little disappointed.
Mark Gagnon
That's disappointing.
Little Pete
I Am. Yeah, I. I prefer, like, sweaty smell.
Rory Rosen
Oh, she licked her own armpit.
Little Pete
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Rory Rosen
Can I.
Little Pete
So, yeah, it's one of the first things I do when I go to the back of the strip club. Like, I go right for their armpit and they. They actually love it. Like, they're like, yo, this is the wildest, craziest night that I've had in a long time. I will never forget you. Okay, here's my night number.
Rory Rosen
L. Pete. Lil Pete. I'm. I've said it multiple times on the podcast. Lil Pete is a legend of.
Little Pete
I'm just a wild dude, bro.
Mark Gagnon
And. But why the armpit? Do you. Have you ever considered maybe your own psychology? Why you like the armpit?
Little Pete
You know, when we were, like, when I was younger, like, my parents had a membership to like, a. A beach club called Silver Gold.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
And, like, we used to go there and, like, I would just look at, like, every woman's armpit from like, the age of like, four or five and.
Rory Rosen
Like, give us a. Why? I guess it's definitely a.
Little Pete
It was. It was an early on fetish and it stayed with me through my whole life.
Mark Gagnon
And, and. And you're. Have you ever done a bit about. About armpit?
Little Pete
No, but I plan on doing it if they actually give me more than five minutes.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, yeah.
Little Pete
I will get into this. I promise you. I will get into the whole armpit thing.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. So if. If a woman said, like the hottest woman you can imagine. Okay. And she said, hey, you can make love to me. Okay. You can. You can. You know, we can have sex or you can lick my armp. 20 minutes. Which one would you pick? You can only do one of the other.
Little Pete
That's a really good question, man. I'm probably gonna try to talk her into doing both.
Mark Gagnon
You can only pick one. You can only pick one.
Little Pete
I'd probably go with the armpit. You know what I'm saying? Have you ever.
Rory Rosen
Have you ever like, an armpit like.
Little Pete
No, that I've never done. It's strictly licking. Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Okay.
Little Pete
Strictly.
Mark Gagnon
But would you. Would that be interesting to you if a girl was like, really?
Little Pete
I'd much rather stick my dick in their.
Mark Gagnon
But you don't want to put your. Your penis on their armpit.
Little Pete
No, it's. It's just the licking and smelling thing.
Mark Gagnon
It's a. Okay. It's licking and smell.
Little Pete
Yeah, it's just a licking and smelling thing.
Mark Gagnon
Now if a girl was like, hey, I'm going to go to the gym and get really, really sweaty.
Little Pete
I come with you. You know, I'll come with you. I leave with you. You don't even need a shower. Like I'm going to do your fudgeing shower now.
Mark Gagnon
Is, is the armpit. Is it gendered? You know what I mean? Like you like a hairy armpit.
Little Pete
No, I mean, listen, but it has to be stopped, probably.
Mark Gagnon
You don't, you know.
Little Pete
Totally, Harry.
Mark Gagnon
Not totally, but now, like, let's say you were doing like, like a threesome. You and like, another guy. Okay. Would you lick his armpit?
Little Pete
No, absolutely not. I will not touch the other guy.
Mark Gagnon
It has to be a woman's arm.
Little Pete
It has to be a woman's armpit. Yeah. I am totally heterosexual. No bisexual tendencies.
Mark Gagnon
But like that, does that, does that do anything?
Little Pete
Not at all. It has to be attached to a woman. It has. Yeah.
Rory Rosen
Only they're there.
Little Pete
Strictly. I am strictly only interested in women.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Little Pete
Okay. But I have a lot of free freaky tendencies. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. Is there anything else that tops the, the armpit predilection? No, the armpit is like, that's your thing.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
What about feet? You like feet?
Little Pete
Oh, yeah, very much.
Mark Gagnon
Okay.
Rory Rosen
Oh, yes, yes.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay.
Little Pete
No, the girl has to have a cute foot if she's got an ugly foot.
Mark Gagnon
Like, and what counts as an ugly.
Little Pete
Foot when the middle toe is longer than the first? I can't stand that. Like, I swear to God. I was recently in the strip club and I'm like, how does a beautiful girl like you not have a boyfriend? Then I look down at her foot and I'm like, oh, that's why, that's why you don't have a boyfriend. Cuz you got that middle toe popping like, like, like, like, you know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
So what else will you.
Rory Rosen
Dude, Little Pete got me laughing so hard is making my asthma.
Little Pete
This is.
Mark Gagnon
I just can't believe it. I, I've never heard of this before, so.
Rory Rosen
Well, there's. Apparently there's 375 people just on Reddit who.
Little Pete
Yeah, yeah.
Rory Rosen
Thousand.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, yeah. So. So, okay, look at the cat.
Little Pete
Look at the beautiful cutie baby, baby. I love all these babies.
Mark Gagnon
So give me, give me some other rankings. Like, if you see a woman, okay, like, you're going to notice her feet, obviously you're going to notice, like, her face and maybe her crotchet.
Little Pete
Armpits is one of the first things I look at. It's first thing, one of the first things.
Mark Gagnon
Okay. And are you able to tell if an armpit is beautiful when the arm is down?
Little Pete
That's hard.
Mark Gagnon
It's tough, right? Yeah. I can imagine you. You would see it and you'd be like, is. You know they're a fold. Do you like it when it's a little, like dark under the armpit?
Little Pete
It depends on who it's attacking attached.
Mark Gagnon
To a beautiful woman, let's just assume.
Little Pete
Is basically I do like a little bit of darkness. I like when I have to strain my eyes to see if there's like a little bit of stubble or hair.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Rory Rosen
What about ass hair?
Little Pete
It doesn't bother me. You know what I'm saying? Like, awesome. Yeah, it doesn't bother me. Like. Yeah, I'm an ass eater. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
You. You enjoy that.
Little Pete
I do, yeah.
Mark Gagnon
What if it's a little. Little wafty down there? What if there's no.
Little Pete
It doesn't stop. I can't.
Rory Rosen
I can't do it.
Little Pete
Yeah, he doesn't. He doesn't have that same iron stomach that I had.
Rory Rosen
No. The first time I ever 69, he's.
Little Pete
Far less freak than I am. He's far less.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, no, the. The first time I ever 69 to girl was my first girlfriend and he.
Little Pete
Just told me that there was like a dingleberry.
Rory Rosen
You ever seen Horton? Here's a who.
Mark Gagnon
Of course.
Rory Rosen
So I'm eating her and I'm face to face with her ass. And from her butthole there's one little hair. And from that hair there's one little speck of poop. It looked like Whoville on the dandelion. Yeah, there are thousands of bacteria in Whoville.
Little Pete
And.
Rory Rosen
And I almost threw up inside of her vagina. It was that now I could never like, even. Anal sex is not something that I'm interested in.
Little Pete
Yeah, I don't do a lot of anal sex either.
Rory Rosen
Hilarious that he draws a lot.
Little Pete
Why is that, like, okay, as far as fucking women in the ass, I. I much prefer women in the. You know what I'm saying? I like anal play, but not like the. The actual anal sex. It's just, it. It doesn't come up often with me. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it does. It doesn't come up often.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, but if, but if you were going. You were in that region and you saw, you know, you saw.
Little Pete
I've. I've had anal sex with three women in my life. Three women.
Mark Gagnon
Oh, wow.
Rory Rosen
Lucky.
Little Pete
And yeah, your dick has to be really, really hard. So that's on a night that you probably haven't partied with any drugs, but.
Mark Gagnon
You'Re Taking Seattle every day.
Little Pete
So not.
Mark Gagnon
Not a problem. Now every day you took C. Forgot.
Little Pete
Absolutely.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, I completely forgot that he take C every day.
Mark Gagnon
So before this podcast, you were like, I need to take my Calis.
Little Pete
I take it. First thing I do when I wake up in the morning is take my Cretor for cholesterol and Calis.
Mark Gagnon
How hard are you? How hard are you right now?
Little Pete
No, I'm not hard at all right now.
Rory Rosen
What's that joke that you have about? Yeah, he has a joke about Cialis getting. Getting pulled over and he's got a bunch of bottles of Calis and he's like, yo, I got to get with the Freo.
Little Pete
No, no, the cop. A bottle of Cialis with the label ripped off. And the cop goes, do you know that it's illegal to carry this without a prescription? Right? And I said, officer, what would the charge be? Attempt to get an erection in the first degree. You know what I'm saying? True story, right? Outside of a strip club, while I was parking in a spot, they had pulled me over because I hadn't put my signal on to turn down the block. And the guy was just like, all right, I'm going to let you go. And I'm like, all right, thanks. Because otherwise, like, I have a great, great night planned ahead. And you know what I'm saying? I can't do it from central booking. You know what I'm saying?
Mark Gagnon
And he lets you go?
Little Pete
He left. He let me go.
Mark Gagnon
He understood.
Little Pete
Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Wow.
Little Pete
He was a good dude. There was another time I got pulled over with my mother in the car, right? And we had. We had gone out to eat, we had been drinking, and she had been bothering me to get back to the house. And the cop goes, you know you ran the stop sign, right? And I'm like, yeah, well, my mother asked me to. He goes, oh, well, your mother asked you to do it. Then you're okay, go ahead. You know. Know.
Mark Gagnon
That's sweet.
Little Pete
It really was.
Mark Gagnon
I gotta remember that. Oh, wow, that's nice. Okay, so you. So you notice the armpit, you notice the feet. Any other features of a woman that you find captivating?
Little Pete
I look at white teeth, pretty eyes. Like small breasted.
Rory Rosen
Usually, like, small breasts are extremely underrated in today's society. And I'm gonna say it, everyone that's in a. The big fake titties, I mean, like, that's. It's kind of. Of gay because the big fake titties, it's kind of like the dick of boobs. It's literally like, oh, it's big. It's hard. Like, whoa, My God, it's so big and hard.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, it's a.
Rory Rosen
It's a boner. It's a titty boner. And the thing is about big boobs. That. Big boobs are awesome. But there is a time frame, because eventually, you know, what is up must come down. And, you know, like. Like with Colombian women in the house, like, somewhere around 30, perhaps. 30. 30. But, you know, I. I retract that statement. That was kind of crazy. I'm sorry. Colombian women, dude. I. I actually really love Colombian women.
Little Pete
I might get my future bride from Colombia. I might get a Colombian mail order one of these days. You know what I'm saying? If I'm, like, 45, 46, and I'm not married, I'm getting a straight Colombian armpit hair, musky, all that.
Mark Gagnon
Would you. Would you go to Thailand?
Little Pete
Oh, I would love to. I want to go to Amsterdam with him. Him, bro. With him. Yeah. And film the whole thing live, bro.
Rory Rosen
We'll make it happen, dog. We'll make it happen, dog.
Little Pete
Yo, yo.
Rory Rosen
Any camera crews listening to this podcast, we're going to answer them.
Little Pete
Pure the Boucher. But I'm telling you, you'd go to.
Mark Gagnon
The red light, right?
Little Pete
To the red light, right?
Rory Rosen
There's Beeline.
Little Pete
I had a joke that I never actually got a chance to tell, and it said that I read an article saying that Hunter Biden makes $31 million a year. Yo, if I was making $31 million a year, I would work for six months and quit, okay? And I'm going straight to the red light district, and I'm going be like, ooh, say what, say what, say what? You know that I like it, baby and you know that I'm about it, baby what song is that? It's from Donnell Jones. Ooh, say what, say what, say what? You know that I like it, baby and you know that I'm about it, baby.
Mark Gagnon
Have you ever brought a girl home and sang to her?
Little Pete
No. I probably should.
Mark Gagnon
You absolutely should.
Little Pete
I actually have a video where I sing. You want to. You want to bring it up?
Mark Gagnon
What is it? Why are you singing?
Little Pete
It's part of the joke. I'll tell you which one it is, right? The.
Rory Rosen
To circle back, though. Big boobs are great. Everyone loves big boobs. Tiny titties are eternal. Those things are. Have longevity.
Mark Gagnon
There's a naturalism.
Rory Rosen
There's a natural that I think is. And let me tell you something. Something. Tiny titties forever. And I stand by that die by that I love tiny titties. Shout out all the women out there with tiny titties. But also, just in general women. You guys go through a lot, and it's really difficult.
Little Pete
Yeah, it's called Farts Are a Sign of Love. It's the name of the video.
Mark Gagnon
Okay, let's check it out, girl.
Little Pete
And I really like her. One of the first things I'll do is fart. And farts are a sign of love. Think about it. Who do we fart in front of? The people that we love and care about the most. If I don't like you, I'm not gonna fart in front of you. And if I don't fart in front of you, that means I don't like you. Ladies, if you ever find yourself on a date with Little Pete and you hear me, fart. That means you warmed your way into my heart tonight. That means this could be love, because I've had the time of my life.
Rory Rosen
And I felt this way before.
Mark Gagnon
Do you consider yourself a feminist?
Little Pete
Feminist in what way? Like.
Mark Gagnon
I didn't think you were gonna. I didn't think you were gonna, you know, balk at a. A layup question, you know, like, do you think women should be allowed to vote?
Little Pete
Oh, absolutely. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
All right. Okay. All right. That's good. I mean, of course. Yeah. All right. No problem with that. Do you think women should be allowed to, you know, fly planes?
Little Pete
Absolutely.
Rory Rosen
You think that women are going through a tough time right now?
Little Pete
No, I think women have got it better than they've ever had before. You know what I'm saying? You got women.
Rory Rosen
Women are killing it right now.
Little Pete
Women are. Got women out there making more money. Money than me. You got women out there that could kick my ass.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, that's true.
Little Pete
You got women out there that'll straight up put a strap on and bang Little Pete with it, and they'll go about their day in, like, okay, nothing. You know what I'm saying? So they've come a long way.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, that's fair. That's fair. That's fair. They're doing pretty good. I'm curious a little people, what do you think about Ukraine and Russia, like, that conflict?
Little Pete
Listen, it's. It's a very bad situation, you know, and there's two sides to every story, you know?
Mark Gagnon
Yeah.
Little Pete
Yeah. I just hope that both. Both sides can. Yeah, where. Where the minimum casualties and people get hurt.
Rory Rosen
You know, what people don't realize is that no matter, you know, what the brand is and kind of what the core messaging Is of Lil Pete. At the end of the day, Lupit do give a fuck.
Mark Gagnon
He gives a.
Rory Rosen
He do give a fuck.
Mark Gagnon
He gives a little bit of a fuck.
Rory Rosen
He does.
Little Pete
No, I do. I just. I don't. The little Pete.
Rory Rosen
Lil Pete don't give a fuck.
Little Pete
Mean. It means what I will. I will tell my story the way that I've experienced it. I don't give a. How it comes out. Okay. I don't have the cleanest life story, but I will tell it the way it happened. And whoever, you know, wants to hear it is welcome to hear it. Whoever doesn't want to hear it, you don't have to listen. I don't give a. I will tell my story to the fullest. That's what it means. Boom.
Rory Rosen
Little Pete don't give a.
Mark Gagnon
Little Pete don't give a.
Little Pete
Little Pete don't give a.
Rory Rosen
Not a.
Mark Gagnon
Well, gentlemen, I've really enjoyed this.
Rory Rosen
This is a blast, man.
Mark Gagnon
I feel like we learned a lot about each other. I think we learned a lot about what it means to be a human, that's for sure. And I think I've learned a lot about myself.
Rory Rosen
Did you?
Mark Gagnon
I did.
Rory Rosen
That's amazing.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah. So with nothing left to say, really, for me, I just want to thank you both so much for coming on and sharing. Sharing your story, sharing, you know, the. The trials and tribulations of a. Of a witch and what it means.
Rory Rosen
To, you know, practice literally just a Jewish person.
Mark Gagnon
No, you practice sex.
Rory Rosen
I. I do not practice sex. Mad magic. I'm curious about people who do it because they do it a lot more than you think they do.
Mark Gagnon
I know that you jerked off watching this podcast. Manifesting.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, manifesting it.
Little Pete
All the armpit looking that I'm going to be doing in the future.
Mark Gagnon
Yeah, exactly.
Rory Rosen
I have, like, a thing for, like, old arc, like archaeological, like, scientist kind of guys, so I, you know, I'd be jerking in this pocket. Yeah. Camp y. Yeah. Yeah.
Mark Gagnon
Well, gentlemen, I really enjoy this. I hope the audience enjoys it half as much as I did.
Rory Rosen
Thanks for having us, Mark.
Mark Gagnon
We got to have you back. We got to have you back. And we got. We got to get to the bottom of. Of more. More of the wild times of little feed and roe and just all the geopolitical conflicts that are happening right now. Yo.
Rory Rosen
And yo come to yo right side of history.
Little Pete
Yeah, please. Little. Little Pete's birthday.
Rory Rosen
Yeah, a little. It's going to be little Pete's birthday party. We're doing it in march, I believe. March 23rd. 3rd. Get Lil Pete on Instagram. Get me on Instagram.
Mark Gagnon
Lil P, would you mind just sending us off with, you know, a song?
Little Pete
And you know that I like it, baby and you know that I'm about it, baby I've had the time of my life and I never felt this.
Mark Gagnon
Way before Keep going. And I swear it's so true Ladies and gentlemen, thank you guys so much. See you next time. Next time. Good night. If you've made it to the end of this episode, that's because you rock with us. And for that, we rock with you. You are sophisticated. You enjoy honest, true communication. A highbrow type of person that understands this. History is not just dates and names. It is a tapestry of human triumph and tragedy. From the day Nostradamus made his first prophecy to the morning Paul Revere took his midnight ride from ancient oracles to modern revolutionaries. That is why I need you. If you have not already, please sign up for Today in History. Our free newsletter. Today in History brings you the stories that matter, the moments that changed everything, and the secrets hidden in time. Join thousands of history enthusiasts who get their daily journey through time. Don't let another day of history pass you by. Take the conversation to your inbox. Sign up now through the QR code or link in the Description Description Today in History because history's stories shape tomorrow's world. Thank you for watching the episode. We'll see you next time.
Podcast Summary: "Camp Gagnon"
Episode: Stripclub Fanatic Explains Armpit Fetish
Release Date: February 18, 2025
In this captivating episode of "Camp Gagnon," host Mark Gagnon welcomes two intriguing guests: Rory Rosen, a seasoned comedian, and the enigmatic Little Pete. The episode delves deep into Little Pete's unconventional life, exploring his unique armpit fetish, tumultuous personal history, and rise in the comedy scene. Through candid conversations and hilarious anecdotes, listeners gain insight into the complexities that shape Little Pete's distinct comedic style.
Mark introduces the guests, highlighting Rory Rosen's comedic prowess and Little Pete's fascinating persona in the comedy world.
Mark Gagnon [03:15]: "The first is my good friend Rory Rosen. Very funny comedian here. How are you, Roy? And the gentleman sitting next to him is Little Pete, a fascinating character in the world of comedy. How are you, Little Pete?"
Little Pete [03:15]: "Pleasure to meet you all. Mark, thank you for having me on here, man."
Mark expresses his admiration for Little Pete's originality in comedy, noting the absence of traditional punchlines and the infectious laughter his clips evoke.
Mark Gagnon [04:25]: "And then the clip ends and I die laughing in my bed alone."
Little Pete [04:53]: "Thank you."
Mark emphasizes the non-traditional structure of Little Pete's humor, appreciating its originality and effectiveness.
To illustrate his unique comedic approach, Little Pete shares clips from his performances that blend absurdity with sharp wit.
These clips highlight Little Pete's preference for unexpected humor, often steering away from conventional joke setups.
Little Pete opens up about his harrowing battle with addiction, including a near-fatal overdose in May 2017. He recounts his experience in the hospital battling klebsiella pneumonia and the pivotal role his mother played in his recovery.
This segment underscores Little Pete's resilience and the support system that aided his recovery.
The conversation shifts to a dramatic altercation between Little Pete and his mother's long-term boyfriend, culminating in a physical fight and subsequent arrest for assaulting a senior citizen.
Little Pete [30:07]: "Boom, boom. Two smacks in the face."
Mark Gagnon [36:12]: "How did you end up fighting your mom's boyfriend on Christmas?"
The incident is detailed comprehensively, revealing underlying tensions and the complexities of family dynamics.
Mark probes into Little Pete's experiences with the supernatural, leading to a discussion about demon possession during a meth binge and encounters with mystical entities.
Rory and Mark explore themes of magic, sex magic, and the intersection of personal experiences with mystical beliefs, adding a deep layer to the conversation.
Returning to the episode's core theme, Little Pete elaborates on his armpit fetish, tracing its origins to childhood observations and explaining how it influences his comedic material.
He discusses the incorporation of this fetish into his stand-up routines, promising to delve deeper into the topic in future performances.
Mark and Little Pete engage in a humorous exchange about Little Pete's sexual escapades, preferences, and unconventional dating experiences, including BDSM relationships and interactions with strip club dancers.
These stories blend humor with personal revelations, showcasing Little Pete's unabashed and raw personality.
As the episode wraps up, Mark expresses gratitude towards his guests for their openness and entertaining stories. Little Pete reiterates the meaning behind his catchphrase "Little Pete don't give a," emphasizing his commitment to sharing his life's journey authentically.
Mark Gagnon [04:25]: "And then the clip ends and I die laughing in my bed alone."
Little Pete [05:06]: "Let's go to a strip club. It's right down the block. Go see some titties and some ass."
Little Pete [19:32]: "I've never seen anybody survive what you just survived."
Little Pete [30:07]: "Boom, boom. Two smacks in the face."
Little Pete [55:03]: "You're a perpetrator of demonic possession."
Little Pete [105:17]: "Every girl that fucks me, you're getting your armpit slicked."
This episode of "Camp Gagnon" offers a multifaceted exploration of Little Pete's life, blending humor with poignant personal stories. From overcoming addiction to embracing unique fetishes, Little Pete's journey is both entertaining and inspiring. Mark Gagnon and Rory Rosen skillfully navigate through these narratives, providing listeners with an engaging and insightful experience.
End of Summary