106: TANA’S EMBARRASSING MOMENT WITH JUSTIN BIEBER

Summary

Cancelled Podcast Episode 106: TANA’S EMBARRASSING MOMENT WITH JUSTIN BIEBER

Release Date: December 21, 2024

In the latest episode of Cancelled with Tana Mongeau & Brooke Schofield, hosts Tana Mongeau and Brooke Schofield delve into a candid and multifaceted discussion covering personal vulnerabilities, recent life events, and reflections on their journey as influencers. This long-form summary captures the essence of their conversation, highlighting key topics, insightful moments, and memorable quotes.

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1. Recapping Past Experiences and Nostalgia

The episode opens with Tana and Brooke reminiscing about their early days, particularly their shared experiences during "emo night" at the Palladium.

• Brooke reflects on her past relationships within the emo scene, humorously stating, "I was really dating the emo nite roster for too long." [01:14]
• Tana shares a memorable moment: "I have to hand pick through every emo person to find you. And what a time it was." [01:48]

2. Tana's Embarrassing Medical Procedure: "Ass Shots"

A significant portion of the episode centers around Tana's recent decision to undergo gluteal injections, colloquially referred to as "ass shots."

• Tana explains her motivation: "My need to not have a micro pancake ass is greater than. Supersedes all logic." [03:40]
• She details the procedure and its aftermath: "I had to go get them against my own will a couple days ago. And they basted me like a turkey." [05:33]
• The conversation highlights the challenges and recovery process, with Tana humorously noting the limitations post-procedure: "I'm smoking the Hank Hill pack. Like, my ass is so flat." [03:02]

3. Navigating Health Concerns: Colposcopy and Anxiety

Following her initial procedure, Tana discusses unexpected health issues that led her to undergo a colposcopy—a procedure to investigate abnormal cervical cells.

• Tana shares her anxiety: "I was hysterical." [07:32]
• Brooke empathizes with Tana's fear, adding her own experiences with medical procedures: "They have to sedate yourself to the point of no return." [09:56]
• The duo examines online reactions and misinformation surrounding colposcopies, emphasizing the pain and trauma associated with the procedure: "It's barbaric. Everybody says it's a. It's barbaric." [10:28]

4. Celebrating Relationships and Personal Milestones

Amidst discussions of health and beauty procedures, Tana and Brooke celebrate personal milestones, particularly Tana's one-year anniversary with her partner, Makoa.

• Brooke expresses heartfelt appreciation: "I just couldn't get the post up in time. It took me so long." [19:26]
• Tana shares sweet anecdotes about Makoa's support: "He set up a whole morning picnic because I had a bit of a lip." [20:35]
• They reflect on the positive impact of relationships on personal growth and sobriety: "Having children... just make you really realize what is important." [53:18]

5. Exploring New Ventures: Acting and Side Projects

Both hosts discuss their forays into acting and the challenges that come with stepping outside their established personas.

• Brooke talks about auditioning for acting roles and the emotional toll it takes: "It's the hardest thing I've ever done." [62:52]
• Tana contemplates participating in reality shows like "The Challenge" and "Survivor," weighing the difficulty against her passion for performance: "I think I would do so well in it." [44:43]

6. Interactions with Other Influencers and Media Misrepresentations

The episode touches on the challenges influencers face with media misrepresentation and public misunderstandings.

• Tana recounts an incident with Paper Magazine, where her stories were misinterpreted: "They took what I say, 'I lived with Justin Bieber in Hollywood Hills,' and twisted it." [41:08]
• Brooke discusses the pressures of maintaining authenticity amidst public scrutiny: "People are so up and up because she hasn't done anything." [34:28]

7. Reflections on Social Media and Mental Health

Towards the end, Tana and Brooke reflect on the impact of social media platforms like TikTok on their mental health and societal perceptions.

• Tana expresses concerns about mental health implications: "TikTok is so scary. Like it's crazy for me to be able to like open TikTok and then like actually want to like self-harm." [58:20]
• Brooke shares her thoughts on the shift from TikTok to other platforms and its effects: "It's just got to be bad for our dopamine receptors." [59:29]

8. Concluding Thoughts and Future Directions

The episode wraps up with discussions about moving forward, purchasing new homes, and the end of filming from their regular set.

• Brooke opens up about the anxiety surrounding buying a house: "The anxiety of being in escrow is some of the most heightened anxiety." [76:05]
• Tana looks ahead to new chapters in their podcasting journey: "This is the end of my life as I knew it, I think, in a lot of ways." [71:17]

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Notable Quotes

• Tana on her determination for cosmetic procedures: "My need to not have a micro pancake ass is greater than. Supersedes all logic." [03:40]
• Brooke on the challenges of medical procedures: "They have to sedate yourself to the point of no return." [09:56]
• Tana celebrating her relationship: "He set up a whole morning picnic because I had a bit of a lip." [20:35]
• Brooke on acting challenges: "It's the hardest thing I've ever done." [62:52]
• Tana on media misrepresentation: "They took what I say, 'I lived with Justin Bieber in Hollywood Hills,' and twisted it." [41:08]
• Tana on social media's impact on mental health: "TikTok is so scary. Like it's crazy for me to be able to like open TikTok and then like actually want to like self-harm." [58:20]

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Conclusion

Episode 106 of Cancelled with Tana Mongeau & Brooke Schofield offers an unfiltered glimpse into the lives of two prominent influencers grappling with personal challenges, health concerns, and the pressures of maintaining their public personas. Through humor, honesty, and heartfelt moments, Tana and Brooke navigate topics that resonate with many, providing listeners with both entertainment and relatability.

Transcript

[A]

How do you feel when you switch.

[B]

To GEICO and save on your car insurance? It's like going to work on Thursday morning and thinking to yourself, just one more day until Friday. But then somebody walks into the elevator and says, happy Friyay. Then you check your phone quickly and discover today is actually Friday. So yes. Happy Fri. Yay, random stranger in the elevator. Happy Fri. Yay, indeed.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

Switching and saving with GEICO feels just like that.

[A]

Get more with Geico. An O'Reilly Auto Parts gift card is.

[B]

The perfect gift for that hard to buy for person.

[A]

Give the gift of convenience from O'Reilly Auto Parts. Auto Parts. Hello and welcome back to the canceled podcast.

[B]

Sorry if I look like I'm in a biker gang right now. Yeah, we again hazed over here.

[A]

Never can coordinate vibes, but I kind of love it.

[B]

It's. Well, the thing is, is this beanie is not a short sleeve T shirt beanie.

[A]

There's no such thing as a short sleeve T shirt beanie.

[B]

It's.

[A]

Well, it's just like, like, so wrong. You can wear anything with anything really. And you do. You do do it. I've seen it.

[B]

I just felt like I had to, like, commit to the look and throw on a jacket. I love it.

[A]

You look amazing. And emo is tonight at the Palladium. So honestly, you can go.

[B]

I used to love emo night so much.

[A]

Do you remember that? Literally the second time we ever hung out, like, just you and I. Or like, it was at emo night, but like, you were like, come to emo night, please. I forget which boyfriend you were with at the time. It could have been like, honestly, a few of them.

[B]

I was really dating the emo nite roster for too long.

[A]

You were. And I showed up to you like, you, you were like, come to emo night. Come to emo. And I got to emoit. You disappeared. Like, literally went.

[B]

I wasn't.

[A]

I had to hand pick through every emo person to find you. And what a time it was.

[B]

You were just looking for emo boots, size 14 in the. Was I? So then was I there?

[A]

Did and honestly looked exactly like you do now.

[B]

The leather jacket beanie combo. Well, the beanie with anything. It's so funny to me how often I wore a black beanie with a slutty outfit. Like, it's like your head is cold and your body is.

[A]

No, that was like. That was the era that I met you in. It was like you were like 2021.

[B]

Like, it was always beanie, beanie and fishnets like, you are so conf. You are so confused.

[A]

In my opinion. I honestly don't even think that's that weird, because that's like. You know what I mean? Like, it's too cold for fishnets, so I have a beanie that's at least.

[B]

Like, my head was warm. Nothing else.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Cheeks, my favorite little leather micro shorts. And micro shorts weren't even in.

[A]

You were ahead of the curve.

[B]

I was ahead of the curve. Hey, hey. I have the giggles, and I'm trying to dial them back right now and think about what we should talk about.

[A]

I have some topics. I'm trying to decide where to start.

[B]

I've just been hopped up on painkillers and different things. I got ass shots two days ago.

[A]

Yes, you did. Can you tell me about the experience?

[B]

Well, the thing is. Okay, so sometimes I forget Paige is my assistant. Right? Like, I really do. And it's like I was talking her in the car one day, just not, like, thinking about it in the an assistant way. I was like, God, I need ass shots. I saw this live photo of my ass where was just bouncing in 2021. Voluptuous, massive. And right now, I'm smoking the Hank Hill pack. Like, my ass is so flat. And I was born with a flat ass. You know what I mean? So it takes me back to my genetics, and it's like, I've worked so hard to get so far away from that girl.

[A]

You've rejected those for so long. You cannot stop now. Exactly.

[B]

And so I was like, just saying, like, God, I want to get ass shots. But I wasn't like, you know what I mean? It's like, God, I want to get a pony. I wasn't like, okay, yeah.

[A]

And then, like, a pony. Yeah.

[B]

Yes. And then the pony showed up. So then a couple days later, I was telling her, I was like, I need to go to the med spa. And I meant for, like, Botox in a lip flip. Very different from ass shots. Okay? You can go in and get Botox and a lip flip. Like a latte, right? Pick it up, in and out. Ash shots is a whole thing. You've got to take a sedative before most people do laughing gas. And then you're, like, out for the count, bruised up, you can't walk, whatever, right?

[A]

I can't believe you put yourself through that, of all people, because I feel like you do not like to do that.

[B]

Like, my need to not have a micro pancake ass is greater than. Supersedes all logic. All everything. Whatever. So anyways, what I get injected in my ass. Sculptra makes her own ass grow. It makes her collagen regenerate. They have to like mix it and prepare it. Okay. Like on some like the Powerpuff Girls. What's the guy.

[A]

Why was I gonna say that? Like making his little thing in the beginning.

[B]

Sugar, spice, everything. Nice sculpture. They have to mix it up and make it. And once they prepare the solution, it has a 15 day shelf life and then it's expired, which is really concerning that's getting injected in me. But then it.

[A]

I'll take whatever that. Whatever's past due.

[B]

Right. That's. You know what I mean? And so I show up for my Botox midday. I have hawk tua after. Like I'm not prepared to be out.

[A]

Did you go to talk to it after?

[B]

No, this was like a week and a half ago. And the new name was like, are you ready for your ass shots? And I was like, no. I would have 17 people with me to hold all of my orifices. I would be so sedated, like, I can't do this today. And she was like, okay, well you have like seven days to do it before it goes bad. They're also like $10,000 worth of shit. Like, I'm not going to put mama noone out like that, Right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So now I'm in this bind where I'm like moving and doing all this shit, but I have to get these ass shots.

[A]

There's just no other choice.

[B]

So I had to go get them against my own will a couple days ago. And they basted me like a turkey. I honestly want the people to see.

[A]

I'm at the Jingle Ball and I receive a video like something I've never seen before.

[B]

It's. Honestly, it's so funny too because I thought I was going to literally go to the Jingle Ball and meet you there after my ass shots.

[A]

It's like, you've never done it before.

[B]

The thing is, is I used to snap back like a rubber band. I'm telling you, this is age. Like I remember this one time I got juiced and pumped up like a turkey and I went directly on a jet to Miami and I was in 11 that night. Brand new ass shots, leaking out, shaking ass at the strippers like it used to not. But now I'm like, it's age. It is, it is. 100%.

[A]

Maybe it's the time of year too. I feel like everything's harder this time of year.

[B]

The needle like, like my skin, like resisting the needle.

[A]

No, I Can't. I'm not kidding. I couldn't even hardly watch it. I'm like, I'm. I have a really sensitive stomach these days. It's like, hard for me to see things. I saw something gory earlier today and I actually threw up.

[B]

Oh, my God, it's so scary. I need to insert it so that people know that I'm clinically insane. It's so scary too, cuz I always bring a lot of people with me to like, support me through. Through it. And like, watching their faces while it's happening is like, oh my God.

[A]

That's almost more traumatizing than anything. Like, I have. I have a procedure coming up tomorrow and who's my emotional support person? Brooke Baldwin, who happens to be getting her wisdom teeth out tomorrow morning. That's Brooke Baldwin.

[B]

That's crazy that you both are going through that.

[A]

I know. And like, I almost didn't skip. Well, because it's like when I. They said I had to schedule, it was like I. It made me feel like I had to schedule it, like, immediately. So then the only day that they had was December 9th or December 27th. And I'm like, I can't go on December 27th. So I had to go on BB's Wisdom Teeth Day. But then I had to move the appointment so that I can take her to her wisdom teeth. And then.

[B]

So who's. Do you need me to come help your puss out?

[A]

Well, here's the other thing. Yeah, it's like I'm. My legs are in the stirrups, but so it's like, I don't. There's not a lot of people that I really, like, think would enjoy the experience. But it's supposed to be so traumatic. Tana. So.

[B]

So yeah, can you.

[A]

I want to bring the people back to last week when I said everybody should be getting a pap smear. And so easy. I was like. Because, you know, people say pap smears are like, super traumatic, and I was like, expecting that. So I, like, put it off.

[B]

I hate when I get those every week.

[A]

Yes. I put it off for, like, genuinely just like, way too long. And I'm 28 years old and just got my first one, and so I go and get my pap smear and it was easy peasy. Okay.

[B]

You made it seem like it was like ear wax.

[A]

It was.

[B]

I didn't even.

[A]

I hardly even noticed that it was happening. I literally. And I was completely fine. Like, no pain meds, nothing, obviously. And so I came on here and I told the People. Well, immediately after that, I get my abnormal results back. Okay? And now I have to get what is called a colposcopy, which is not to be confused with a colonoscopy, which is what I've been running around telling everybody all week that I'm getting. Basically, when you Google it, it says that they are going to put just like a camera up there. Okay?

[B]

Like.

[A]

Like that's what they're doing.

[B]

That's what a colonoscopy is, right?

[A]

Yeah. They put a camera on their asshole.

[B]

Yeah, but go pro up your poop shooter. But take the microway Tana.

[A]

A colonoscopy is like, to find abnormal cells. But, like, if you're getting a colposcopy, they already know there's abnormal cells, so they have to take a biopsy. Okay? What a biopsy is, apparently, is a big fat chunk out of your cervix. Okay. And it's done with no anesthesia, no pain management, nothing. They're just. They just say, you'll be fine. And I would like to read you some of the raving reviews online.

[B]

Pain management, that feels like Trump's.

[A]

They said, I swear to God, they said, take an ibuprofen before.

[B]

I said, girl, if you don't take one of each of the medicine cabinet, I would never tell any of the fans out there to do that. But as my dear friend, no.

[A]

So, so, and literally online it says, like, it's not that bad. So I searched it on Tick Tock because everything on Tick Tock is true.

[B]

I've always said that.

[A]

And I'm not kidding. Like, all the videos are like, I cannot believe. Like, this is actually inhumane.

[B]

I would walk in, like, I hate people. I love them. I would really walk in the game. Ready for me?

[A]

Trust me. I'm picking up my pain management from Tijuana in the morning. And then this is what people are commenting. This is just one video of a colposcopy, like, review. And the comments are, colposcopy was, without a doubt the most painful thing I've ever experienced. I fainted. I have two kids and I had thyroid cancer. This was much worse.

[B]

Do you know when you get pizza and there's like, cubed ham on your pizza? That's what I'm imagining. I'm taking.

[A]

Okay, well, so I posted a video about this today, and somebody said, when you say chunk, just know it is a chunk. They said, it's the size of your fingertip. Okay? This person says, I work in a clinic and it's. It is common to hear women screaming in all caps in a colposcopy. I've set up for the procedures with no anesthetic ever included. Having chunks of flesh removed hurts. It's barbaric. Everybody says it's a. It's barbaric. It's unacceptable that we as women are treated like this. Like, I cannot. No local, no top.

[B]

We're in la. Like, where does JLO go? I know they give her laughing gas.

[A]

There are no words for the agony. Worst thing ever. No anesthetic told it there. They tell you it's just a pinch. It is not just a pinch. Like, everyone basically is like, absolutely sedate yourself to the point of no return.

[B]

I would get so up. I would do it myself and come in and be like, here's my. Yeah.

[A]

So I saved this video to show you. Well, I watched, like, a real one get performed. Like. Like, I watched it, like, the camera footage of it.

[B]

What do you mean? Live on Twitch.

[A]

No, it's on TikTok. Because it's just like, you know, it looks like a throat or something. Like, you can't tell. It's like someone's cervix. But I thought you might appreciate that. I show you just the video of them doing it to an orange instead.

[B]

I would actually appreciate the citrus version.

[A]

I searched colposcopy Visual, bro, this song.

[B]

Over they're at Being gyno Girls is hilarious. Okay, hold on. I'm sorry. It just being done on an orange is so funny.

[A]

Like, imagine them doing that to, like, your lip.

[B]

I swear to God, I would come in with it, like, myself.

[A]

Like, I think that's, like, they're slicing. Like, even if it's appears small.

[B]

The only thing I want to say is that, like, it looks fast. Like, is it that fast? But it's on your still feel it after and you, like, have to do it.

[A]

Yeah, I have to do it. Or I could just, like. Like, ride it out and, like, maybe die or something. I don't know what's wrong. That's the thing. Like, so you don't. That's what they have to find out.

[B]

I'm trying to make you feel better. Like, I'm like, I want to support you through this. Obviously, I love you.

[A]

No, I mean, I think it's gonna be fine, but because some people. So there are some people who are commenting and they're like, it's not as bad as you think it's gonna be, but, like, most people are commenting, like, literally, you should probably just. Now I feel like I would try.

[B]

A new like I would go on Molly like to like like so I would enjoy it like no take more.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know. I really. It's just really crazy. But I don't know. It's. It's made me reevaluate some things.

[B]

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[B]

Of course. I take that too literally on a daily basis.

[A]

Yeah. Well, that's how I feel about the lady who told me that she won't give me under eye filler. Okay. Because at first I appreciated. I was like, you know what? That was like that I probably needed that. But then I'm looking at myself and I'm like, please, somebody give it to me.

[B]

I don't think you need.

[A]

So if you're out there and you would be willing to perform the procedure on my face, no anesthetic needed. I will sacrifice.

[B]

I know a girl. Well, wait, what procedure? Wait.

[A]

Well, no, I just want to film my. I've always folded my under eyes. But then it started, like, low key, like.

[B]

Well, as I've been researching what's happening, what's happening to Lindsay Lohan, and she looks amazing. Christina Aguilera. A lot of roads are leading to sculpture. Like, they're getting sculpture in their face, which is.

[A]

No, but everyone's saying prp, which is the same concept. Like, you regenerate collagen on your own.

[B]

I'm saying I've been trying sculpture for years in my hip dips. Like, you know.

[A]

Oh, you started it again.

[B]

I know my body just, you know, I know it's acclimated to that. There's more sculpture in me than, like, white blood cells.

[A]

Yeah, I had PRP scheduled, but then we had to film cancer.

[B]

Can't they do it during your cervix removal?

[A]

No, but, like, wouldn't that be nice?

[B]

That's what you should do. I would have, like.

[A]

Like when you're already under.

[B]

Like, I'd have an at home nail tech there. Like, something to distract me. I'd be like, I want the tortoise French tip. Like, what if you, like, collabed on something else happening? No.

[A]

Well, but it is funny because I actually did get my nails done at the spa at A Kesha concert the other night. Like, genuinely?

[B]

No. I walk into this Spotify event and I'm like, don't know many people there. It's so funny too. I walk in the. It's me and Makoa and the first person we see is Finita. And she walks up to Mako and not even me and just goes, you eat ass. I know you eat ass. God, I love her grilling macawan. If he eats us. And I'm trying to find you and I start asking everyone where you are and then you're just getting your nails done.

[A]

I was getting my nails done, but I needed my nails done. There was a nail tech at the party and I've always seen that and been like, this. Is that really?

[B]

You didn't know that? The one with the orange hair, that's my nail tech.

[A]

I think she did bb.

[B]

That's so funny.

[A]

And she slayed her. Mine are coming off low key, but I honestly didn't give her lots to work with.

[B]

But you can get like your eyebrows threaded during your cervix optomy.

[A]

I don't think I can.

[B]

Like, I almost think because that hurts, you know, I'm trying to think.

[A]

I don't know, I think it's. I think all. All roads are leading to sedating. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, I don't even think that's like misusing of the drug. The fact that we live in a society where women are supposed to raw dog. That is.

[A]

Yeah. I also have some leftover. Well, I didn't take any of my pain medicine when I got my boobs done, so maybe I take it tomorrow.

[B]

Yeah. But I just feel like the anxiety too. I don't want to like, you do what you is best for, you know.

[A]

I am really anxious about. I'm not kidding. Like when I started watching these videos and reading these comments, I was like hysterical. But yeah, I mean, whatever.

[B]

I think that just go in really comfortable maybe, you know. God, I have no advice. It's so funny.

[A]

Me and Bibi were like having a competition today because, like, I think she's like, I don't want to say jealous, but like she's. I think she's getting mad that I'm.

[B]

Like, like, oh, this is YouTube's worst nightmare. One of you's got a octomy and the other one's getting their wisdom teeth out.

[A]

She's getting so much. Like, it's not even bad. Like, it's literally not bad. Like invalidating my feelings because I think she wants to tomorrow to be her Day.

[B]

Understand that's like. That's tough for you two with the like pain Olympics.

[A]

No, but it's actually funny because we're going to just have to. We're both going to be like out for the count at the same time. And I think we should just like.

[B]

But maybe Chris can each schedule a day this week where it's like your day for everyone to like coddle you about.

[A]

It is really funny. Like, just a funny coincidence.

[B]

They have to pudo slice. Yeah. Let me know if you need anything. I mean, seriously, that's like. Okay.

[A]

I just want to feel something.

[B]

Does that mean like more space for your tampons?

[A]

I don't even know what a cervix is like now.

[B]

Are you going to need like super plus plus?

[A]

I. What? What made you assume that I was already using?

[B]

Okay, I. If I could actually shove a roll of paper towels up there, I would. I have to talk to you about my blood as well. I was going to save this for the Patreon.

[A]

Maybe we should.

[B]

It's not really rated R. It's just disgusting. And I know people are so sick of me talking about like this. No pun, but like, I have got to talk about it.

[A]

Tell me the.

[B]

Okay, mind you, Mokoa and I just had our one year anniversary. Okay.

[A]

Happy anniversary. It's today. Very special day. It's yesterday.

[B]

I just couldn't get the post up in time. It took me so long. I had to go through every photo of us to ever exist, you know, and pick my favorites. But so sweet. And I just love him so much. I just want to say, like, I'm so happy. And I just can't believe it.

[A]

It flew by.

[B]

I know.

[A]

It's so crazy. You sat down here literally the second you met him and you said, I'm telling you right now, like, I'm gonna marry this guy.

[B]

And I just. Know what, I love him so much. He's really love of my life. It's so crazy. It feels like 10 years, but also like five minutes. And he did the sweetest stuff I like last week I was saying there's this area of the house that I've never used. This little like grass area. Think in front of us. Oh, yes. And he set up this whole morning picnic because it was after my ass shot. So we had to like reroute the plans because I had a bit of a lip.

[A]

You had to like sit on a donut?

[B]

No, I'm not kidding. He made me like a BBL pillow and there was a picnic and he Made like, a scrapbook of all of our photos and all this cute stuff. And it was really sweet that he, like, also because he had a whole day planned. And then I was like, wait, I can't walk. Just very cute anniversary vibes. Like, I've just been on my cute vibe with McCoy, okay. Two nights before our anniversary, right? And I've. I've been talking to you about this. I've always had a bleeding problem, okay. And the more I think about, I'm starting to have memories of my childhood, of, like, my mom, as she got older, having the same problem. Like, really bleeding.

[A]

Like, I remember maybe it's like a clotting issue. Like, some people don't clot and I don't clot.

[B]

Like, during my nose job, I almost died. You know, I was spewing like a fountain, and they thought I was anemic. And like I said, still think I am. I never got the blood test. It's.

[A]

You can do the test right now.

[B]

Just the.

[A]

Just the arm test.

[B]

Oh, yeah. And that when I. When I do that, it does. Yeah. So lately it's been crazy. Like, I'm talking super plus tampon filled in three minutes. It's like, literally, how is this coming out of me like this? I don't know what's going on. Okay. I don't know if I'm really about to take it there. But I. I also decided, we're all friends here, that I wanted to try Mounjaro.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Now I feel like I have to go on a whole tangent about that. Okay. I'm not taking from the diabetics.

[A]

I feel like we're past that. Like, are people still mad about that?

[B]

I don't know if people are still saying, I don't have a good view semaglutide that you are taking from people in need. But I just want to let everyone know that I go to this. Like, well, I'm not. I don't go. Like, I. This was. I just wanted to try it, okay. And I went to, like, a celebrity person who only does, like, the people she does is crazy. Like, you know who she does? Like, I wish I could tell you. Like, I've been getting the tea and it's like, everyone's on it. Like, if I'm not taking this medicine, she is only giving it to, like, insert a list person here, right? And, like, she keeps that in her walk in closet. It's never making it to the icu. Whatever I decide, I want to try it. And so then obviously now you know like, if anything medically weird were to happen with my gastrointestinal areas, that's now a factor, right?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Okay. And so I go to the bathroom the other night. It's like two in the morning. I'm bleeding out everywhere. Like I said. I'm filling up these. I'm just really bleeding out and. Digital footprint. I'm trying to think of the word. Okay, this. I'm noticing a. A symptom of this injection being that, like my shits.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

They're not giving like full and thorough. Okay. Like sometimes it's like one step higher than a fart. Okay.

[A]

Like just take a little.

[B]

Just a little. Like a.

[A]

Like a shart on water.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Like a little more than a shark. Like there's some solidity to it. I'm so sorry.

[A]

Okay, just imagine, I'm pretty sure like Amari can hear us. And I imagine like walking by, like.

[B]

And so, you know, bleeding out. And then obviously, you know, I feel a little, A little pebble.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Incoming.

[A]

Incoming.

[B]

And I've already, you know, situated my period situation. Okay. And you know when you're wiping the front, I wipe the front.

[A]

Do you?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

No, you shouldn't always front to back the whole thing. Yes.

[B]

Oh, don't get me started on full front to back wipers. I know what you're going to say. You're going to say something can happen if I wipe. I'm not saying I wipe from my ass to my. But I'm saying like, like, I'm just saying like, if it's. If I'm like bleeding, like I'm just gonna like scoop up.

[A]

Yeah, well, you gotta, you know, it's like wipe like changing a diaper. I feel like you gotta scoop every direction.

[B]

I'm so sorry. Okay? This is so, so embarrassing. And so obviously, you know, when I'm pooping, I go from the back up, right? And so I wipe back up. And when I. And you know, I'm. I like to check out what's happening each time. I'm that kind of person. Okay. It's not.

[A]

Nobody. Nobody thought.

[B]

Aaron was just turning off the camera and I was like, that is so real. Make podcast equipment more expensive. I just, I go to check.

[A]

Nobody doesn't check. You're lying if you say don't check. If you just blindly throw it in the trash, then you're dirty because you don't know if you're done or not.

[B]

100. Like. So I just, I go to check and like, I blood. A lot of blood. Like I've never seen this. You.

[A]

How do you know it wasn't your period?

[B]

I don't. Oh, okay. But, like, I only wiped my. Okay. And it is like blood clots. Like big black blood clots with so much bright red blood. So I scream at the top of my lungs. I go back to check again. I'm like, oh, my God. No, I just. Blood. Right? And so obviously it's like two in the morning and I'm not gonna. Like, no one else was home either. It was just me and Mako.

[A]

Who do you call?

[B]

So I shove a super Soaker up there. You know your. No, no, no, no, no, no. Well, and I run out to Makoa and mind you too. I was like, just a. To him before I walked in the bathroom. So imagine like, I, like, just. I was just a little bitchy. It was nothing. Like, not a huge fight, but I was just a little bit of a. I walked to the bathroom. I was planning on walking back, head held high, standing on bitch. This right?

[A]

No.

[B]

And I walk back and I have to be like, I just shit blood. I just shit blood. And then it's like, obviously someone who cares about you is going to ask like, every question and I'm having to explain all this to him. And, like, there's just no probable way that that much. With the way that I wipe that. That much blood was on like, my gooch.

[A]

Your gooch?

[B]

My teeth.

[A]

I'm like, working hard on not being judgmental in this conversation. And I agree with you. I think that you must have shipped blood. There's no way your gooch could hold all that volume. That blood volume.

[B]

It was like a serious clots. Serious. And then I was in the bathroom, like, really trying to, like, again so I could like, you should have shoved.

[A]

Honestly, you should have shoved a tampon.

[B]

Up your ass just to see, because I can't stress to you enough. So then obviously I'm on Google. And a side effect of Manjaro can be that people get, like, hemorrhoids or like, fissures, right? But this wasn't giving, like, rip of the hole. This was giving what I saw came out of me, deep inside of me, and no solution. I mean. And I just still didn't go to the hospital, which I think is, like, really crazy.

[A]

Well, if it's resolved itself, like, you're probably good to go.

[B]

And so now I'm like, I don't know if I ever want to try Manjaro again. Because I'm like, what if that was the reasoning, you know what I mean, but then everything just went back to normal. But imagine having to walk out to Makoa tail between my legs two days before our one year anniversary. Like I ship led and then now I'm explaining to him a period and how I wipe and all this just like nonsense.

[A]

Well, you know what? Nothing to be ashamed of. Periods are normal. My period is not normal at the moment.

[B]

What's going on?

[A]

That was the concern. That's why, literally why I went in in the first place.

[B]

Why?

[A]

Because I've never, literally my entire life I've always had like perfectly like to the hour, like, like regular periods. And I very, I'm very lucky, very light periods. Like maybe it's. It always goes two, two days on, one day off, one day on again. It's like the strangest thing, but it's so consistently that. And all of a sudden like I got my period a week early and then the next month I got it another week early. So now I'm two weeks early from my normal period time. And then this last period that I just had one day long, like not even a day. So I was like, wait, something's wrong. And then I went and they were.

[B]

Like, let's take a chunk. It's so funny. Jeff Wittek always like cooks me, like just as a bit. He'll be like, yeah. And you guys sit down and just talk about your periods and vaginas for an hour. And I'm always like, we talk about so much more than that. No, we. Fudgeing don't.

[A]

Well, it's normal.

[B]

I shit blood. Like, that's the thing. People, like, don't talk about your bowel movements on your podcast. If you had a podcast and you shit blood and you had to go tell your boyfriend two days before your one year anniversary because you're home alone, it's three in the morning that you think you shit blood. But you're also on Manjaro and you're trying to figure it out. You might want to discuss that on a podcast too.

[A]

I complete. I'm, you know what, diva, I am always on your side.

[B]

Take the mic away. Take the fudgeing mic away. I just like, I don't know. I like. I've been wanting to talk about the fact that I like dabbled in some Manjaro, but I just think that it's like that showed me that I shouldn't. And after watching the substance, like, I just, what the fuck is wrong with me? I think I learned my lesson. And back to the Jonas Brothers it goes. Kidding I'm not.

[A]

Oh, I get it. Oh my God, I hate when that happens. I was on a major delay, but yes, Nick Jonas does have diabetes. I feel so sorry.

[B]

I just. It was one shot, I promise. I'm not.

[A]

I just, I actually, I just. I don't think semaglutide goes to Nick Jonas. I think it's also tri Zepatide. Oh, see, I just. I know nothing about it.

[B]

Every bitch in LA knows everything about it. That's the thing too that's so frustrating is like, I know I'm gonna get so much hate for saying that I tried one shot. Even though again, it's seriously a celebrity nurse who like keeps them in a cooler in her car and drives around.

[A]

It's actually crazy because I borrowed your. Your celebrity nurse and well, I didn't even know it was happening. I just was asking my manager, like, need lamictal now. Okay. And she just showed up at my door and she was like, oh, by the way, like, my name is like, blah, blah.

[B]

I recognize that it's like a kind like the, the doctors to the stars that like don't have an office and like, they just drive to all these celebrities houses. That's all they do.

[A]

And like the people who were prescribing like Anna Nicole Smith her medications and Michael Jackson and stuff, that's how like, where it gets a little scary for me.

[B]

No, it's. It's a very, very like crooked dark side of Hollywood. Like all the doctors because they just, they don't care. And it's crazy too because all of the doctors that I have and like, see, for all the things like I pretty much do only use like the celebrity doctors and like, they give me so much tea, like I should not know what like, prescribed.

[A]

Yeah. Where it is hipaa.

[B]

I know every single person like major A list celebrity that like, has ever tried Ozempic. Like, and it's all of them, but it's nuts. Like, that shouldn't be.

[A]

Yeah, but they're. If they're telling you about other people, they're telling other people about you.

[B]

I know. Getting ahead of the curve here. But like, it's just nuts that I'm going to get so cooked. But it's like every single person on my for you page.

[A]

This is the canceled podcast.

[B]

I guess it's so true.

[A]

Wait, speaking of podcast, which we actually weren't at all. You went on talk to a.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And now she's going to jail.

[B]

What do you mean she's going to jail? Why are you trying to Correlate those.

[A]

No, no.

[B]

Imagine I set up a sting operation on hog dua. No.

[A]

I just think, like, are we cursed or something? Like, I feel like everything we touch turns to stone. Like, we both went on. Okay, no, but honestly, I actually got a lot of hate for going on talk to her because they thought that, like, she was genuinely, like, ghosting you and like, she didn't want to have.

[B]

You on, but, like, it was just scheduling issues. But it was just a funny. I mean, like, she wasn't replying to me. Everything I said was true.

[A]

Like, it was just. But it was like a funny bit. And like, it wasn't like, oh, my God, she hates Hannah. I'm gonna go on talk to her. Like, that was never the vibes. But did you not see, like, everything that she's in? I don't know if it's like, Well, I shouldn't be talking about something that I don't know if it's true or not. But, like, basically the scandal is her, like, whole app that she was. It was like hawk to a coin. Which already is like, I love her so much.

[B]

And I feel like we had to learn that influencers shouldn't have coins. After Logan Paul had like. Yeah, he had.

[A]

Yeah, he had like, a similar scandal. I think it was like, the same thing. And in my opinion, this is the fault of whoever's advising her because I don't think Haley Welch is like, Is really like, doing all that. You know what I mean?

[B]

It's. It's actually the team around that is. It's wild. I haven't. I haven't really seen.

[A]

But like, a lot of people, I guess lost money. But then it's like. I mean, at what point is it.

[B]

When did they having the coin?

[A]

What?

[B]

Like, like, when did she release the coin?

[A]

Like, recently, like.

[B]

Like this year?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No one should have coins anymore.

[A]

But like, I guess. Yeah.

[B]

I mean, it's not. I'm not judging her. I think that I 100 put the fault on whoever that was.

[A]

What I wanted to have the conversation about. I think it's just like a such a classic example of like, somebody, like getting a lot of attention really quickly and like taking the first team that comes across their desk and like, these people got her in trouble.

[B]

That it's. The tale is old this time. That's always going to happen. Someone's going to blow up overnight. Especially, like, it's one thing when people are from major cities and have resources and stuff. It's much scarier when it is someone who, like, doesn't want this, knows nothing about it, is not protecting them.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Someone's knowledge.

[A]

You can make so much money from doing this thing that you're gonna do it. Like, Haley Welch is not, like, plotting behind the scenes to scam people.

[B]

No. There's so many things in my career where even just, like, releasing a perfume, like, I would go to my team and be like, I want the perfume. I want it to look like this. And then, like, it comes out this. The bottles, Alibaba. And everyone's saying I just wanted to scam people, but it's like, no, I just didn't know that. You know what I mean? Like, it's. It's because I'm sure she probably asked all questions in her wheelhouse, like, hey, is this okay? Like, you know what I mean? But, like, yeah, that sucks.

[A]

I know.

[B]

I, like, always just get really sad for any influencers when I see that, when I feel like they're like.

[A]

Like it.

[B]

Being puppeteered potentially. Like, and it's, like, very scary and that I feel like with her rise to fame in the way it is, it's really scary territory. Even just being there, like, all the people. I was like, I hope she really, like, wants to do the things that she's doing. It's crazy, though. Even I posted and all my comments were like, tana, no, Tana. Like, I understand that people are saying, like, that her content maybe lacks substance.

[A]

I just don't.

[B]

But, like, I agree. Socrates. Like, I'm Einstein. Like, that really, like, a hop, skip, and a jump away from me going on. Hawk tua.

[A]

Like, I like, truly think, like, they're just really, like, actually funny. I think that everyone's just mean.

[B]

I was getting so much hate for going on, like, genuinely, like, I was getting a lot of. And I was like, of all things, like, you can think she's stupid. You don't have to watch it. You don't have to. But, like, for people to be so up and up. Because she hasn't done anything.

[A]

No. Now there's getting attention. Yeah, but, like, oh, yeah. And then now there's this.

[B]

Yeah, but like, this was before that, I guess. And it's just, like, that's so strange to me. I just. I feel so sad for her because it's like, I really think I've said it a million times. I'll keep saying it. I think any girl or person in her position would do it, too. For a check.

[A]

Yeah. And I think it'll pass, hopefully. But did you have a good time.

[B]

Yeah, it was cute. Honestly, it was just like I had a long day. It was at the end of my day, I just really went to chat. I really just. It wasn't like this hootie crazy time. I think I just left with a very protective energy. Like I was just very much like, especially when I just see these younger crazy girls getting thrown into this industry. I think that my mind just always goes to all the that happened to me and I just like get very like protective and just all the people around and I, I was telling her they'll probably cut it from her podcast, but I was kind of just being like talking to her about how like you're gonna have off days, you don't have to be on every day, you don't have to be this character that you don't want to be. Like you are a multifaceted human being and like, remember that. And she was kind of saying like, tell my managers that. And I was like, you know, like, I just really fucking hope she's like happy and wanting to do.

[A]

Maybe she is. Maybe her managers are slaying and I'm just an asshole.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

So I actually want to talk to you about people in the industry not slaying.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I was just on the COVID of Paper magazine, and I want to say it was the biggest fucking honor. And it was just such a cool concept. I think that I don't know if they're stopping at L A and if they only did this for LA or if they're going to do it for, like, New York and other cities too. I really don't know. They did this set of digital covers that was like, all la, right? So they had just all these different characters, like Marsha Molinari who, like, does H. Wood and like, all that type of stuff. And like, Lisa Rinna, who's like, a different era of a different type of la, and like, Ricky Thompson and just like, Rebecca Black and all these. Heidi Montag, different era, like, all these just very. The Queen of Melrose. Just very different characters who all kind of represent LA in different ways and stuff like that, you know? And they essentially. They wanted the feel of the COVID to be like walking into a party in la. Like, this is so fucking random, this grouping of people. And I felt like they executed that really well. It was very much like, why the fuck are all these people, like, together, right? And I'm so excited to do it. They wanted me to vape on the COVID I was, like, sold in a corseted dress cutting into me, like, lightheaded from smoking. But I love that when, like, I think you truly serve when you leave a little injured too, you know? Like, I love that. I feel like I gave it my all. I was on the COVID with Carter. I love him so much. It was. It was everything, right? That. That's my point. That's it. I go to the shoot. It's the best day ever. And then a couple weeks later, the COVID comes out. I see the COVID and I'm like, I'm so happy with my image and, you know, me and my fucking facetune. So I was really happy just like, that they chose a good image that didn't. I didn't feel like needed facetune, whatever, right? And so after we shot the COVID they interviewed us, right? And they're asking us all these questions, just like, what does LA mean to you? Why do you love la? What are your craziest LA stories, right? And I answer, like, 20 of these questions. And one of the last questions was, what are your craziest memories? Living in la, right? And so I tell this person and I quote and I quote, I tell this interviewer about the time that I lived on Weed Lake Drive next door to the hype house. Next door to me was Post Malone crew. And like, my house was very much just like a revolving door. It was such a crazy time. I'm saving so many of these stories for the. The book. Like, just the parties and the. That happened in my house. It was so insane. And I was talking about the house as well. I was talking about how, like Faze Clan lived there before me. Justin Bieber shot a bunch of music videos in the house before me. Like, Juice World lived there at one point. So many crazy people. I was talking about how the owner of the house sued me and sued pretty much every single person who lived in the house. And I'm the only person who's ever won against him. And, like, I'm the only girl who ever lived there. I tell them all the lore of me living in this house and I say I'm saving the story for the book. And do you want to know what they took from this quote? What did they take? That I lived with Justin Bieber in Hollywood Hills. I lived with Justin Bieber. I lived with Justin Bieber. Are you imagine me I open my phone blown up, like, genuinely, all my DMs, TikTok comments, text messages, you lived with Bieber. How are you going to drop this lore on us? Like, how are you just now going to fucking tell us that I get a Reddit notification? Tana's known to lie. She's so exaggerated, yada, yada.

[A]

She's lying about why. Realistically, like, I don't think you would ever lie knowing it was going to be printed in a magazine.

[B]

Just this time. Like, again, I hate people. I love them. That girl did live with Justin Bieber. You know what I mean? But like, are you kidding me? And then I'm just. I am such a Belieber. I am such a Belieber. Like, I know a lot of people from Bieber's team that like, follow me, like, just at the off chance. And, like, I am.

[A]

He thinks he, like, made that up.

[B]

I'm so leave Bieber alone. Like, I am so leave Bieber alone. Like, him and Haley and Jack, like, let them fucking live. I never want to be a part of that problem. How fucking embarrassing. Paper magazine. And it's not like, it's like a writer saying, like, Tana alleges she lived with Bieber. It is like, Tana. And then I lived With Bieber in Hollywood Hills. Mind you, the other people's are like, I went to a glory hole once. Like, how it looks like I'm like, trying to, like, name.

[A]

I actually really sorry that happened to you because the anxiety that that would give me, like, is like, it would be really bad. But you know what? This is what I will say. He, of all people knows exactly what it's like to have your words just twisted and bent out of shape. Okay? He probably knows that that was a misunderstanding.

[B]

Of all people knows he didn't live with you.

[A]

He of all people knows that he wouldn't go within 100 yards at your house.

[B]

I'm so embarrassed. Paper eventually responded and they sent, like, this emoji and they were like, our bad. Like, we'll change it.

[A]

Our bad is crazy.

[B]

It's fine now. But like, that just would happen to me. Like, that didn't happen to any other of the 30 people on that cover.

[A]

Like, that's so funny. Like, it's not funny.

[B]

No, it's so. It is so funny. Like, I've just. But like, there were like four days last week where I was just responding to so many texts. Like, I know I didn't live with Justin Bieber. Are you. Can I just have one thing? Like, how about congrats on the COVID of Paper? Like, are you crazy?

[A]

To me, this is what I am pulling from this conversation. Crazy how many people read the article. You know what I mean? Like, I never read it. If I see a cover, I never usually read the article.

[B]

I know I was kind of gagged. I guess that is true. I do. I love reading articles.

[A]

Really?

[B]

But I don't know.

[A]

I always say I read an article instead of saying I watched a TikTok, I read an article about.

[B]

You read an article that your podcast co host lived with. Just live with Justin Bieber.

[A]

I'm happy we cleared that up. Every idea starts with a problem. Warby Parker's was simple. Glasses are too expensive. So they set out to change that. By designing glasses in house and selling directly to customers, they're able to offer prescription eyewear that's expertly crafted and unexpectedly affordable. Warby Parker glasses are made from premium materials like impact resistant polycarbonate and custom acetate. And they start at just $95, including prescription lenses. Get glasses made from the good stuff. Stop by a Warby Parker store near you. I'm going to start training for the challenge.

[B]

Please.

[A]

I'm dead fucking serious.

[B]

I think you could do it.

[A]

Here's the thing. I watched an entire Season of the challenge in the last 24 hours. Because I've never watched it. Olivia's obviously like our friends. She's. She was on the challenge. She's on like four seasons.

[B]

We love her.

[A]

Obviously. She's been my friend. I've never seen her on the challenge. So watching her in this, like, in this light was so crazy. Tana, she's a monster. Like, first of all, so amazing. Like, just like so strong. She's a, like, she's just like, she can do everything.

[B]

I need to watch it tonight.

[A]

So agile. Just so good. All the challenges. Never gives up. Will do everything, anything. She's, you know, slurping like sardine mayonnaise water, like doing every. She's jumping from buildings, she's scaling walls.

[B]

She's like a really wild, like, she's like a fun party girl. Like, she's really.

[A]

She's such a girly girl. Like, by the way, she. There's not a single challenge that she does without a Miami lash on. Like, she is. She's in a full beat, like genuinely like doing the crazy.

[B]

And she always talks to us about going to film the challenge. I feel like she's always going to film the challenge and like, I just never seen her and I don't know why. Yeah.

[A]

And like, obviously, I mean, it's not really a spoiler because, you know, this happened to her. But like in the. She's in the finale and it's a hundred hour long finale. Smashes her entire face. Breaks it in five places.

[B]

Yeah. And then she's a buyer, a new nose. And she's just funny and she.

[A]

But she's just going. She's going, can I still, Can I finish? Can I finish? She's going, is it broken? Her. Her literal nose is like on her temple. Like, it is so crazy. But what I gather from it is that obviously I want to do that as well.

[B]

Well, I loved that show that Jojo Siwa and Black China Run.

[A]

Yeah. Special Force is.

[B]

And Jojo Si was like, literally, I'm scaling a mountain. And she like kills it. She kills it.

[A]

I think those are like more extreme conditions in the challenge because the challenge is unique in that, like it's. It's like real world kind of vibes because it's the same people come back over and over again. So it's like a. It's like a reality show kind of. So that's why she keeps going back is. Whereas like the relationships like her. The season 38 was filmed in Argentina, but I think they switch around. But like, all the, like, people, like, like, two people were engaged, and, like, two of them just had a baby, and, like, they're very much, like, intertwined in each other's lives and seasons and, like, people come back and stuff. So it's very, like, cool in that way. But I want to go on it so badly.

[B]

Like, I think you 100 good. That's so fun.

[A]

And I think, like. Like, I know it's like I'm being haha funny, but, like, I think, like, genuinely in this scenario, I would adapt, like, the adrenaline and stuff. Like, I think I would be able to do those things.

[B]

I think you might also be so entertaining on a show like that. Like, I would love to see that.

[A]

Olivia is so fun. I just want you to watch it. So funny, like, with completely unintentionally the most hilarious person I've ever seen. And, like, also, the editors on the challenge are hysterical. Like, just. You could tell they just started getting hootie with it at the end.

[B]

No, I love that.

[A]

So funny. And I need something to live for. So I think I'm gonna go really crazy and really start training for the challenge, and then I'm gonna throw my phone off a balcony and I'm gonna disappear for three months.

[B]

I think it's so lit. I think you would kill it. That's why I want to go on Survivor. We should try.

[A]

I don't think I could last on Survivor because I, like, the challenge is sick because, like, you still go to bed in a mansion every night.

[B]

Oh, I guess that's true. I also only ever imagined myself, like, I've always said Survivor's my dream, but I only imagined myself on Survivors single because I would like my way to the finale.

[A]

Oh, showmance.

[B]

Like, yeah, just, like, you would have.

[A]

An amazing social game. I just don't. I don't think that I could, like, physically endure the conditions on Survivor. Like, that's. I think that I could handle the challenges. Not really a puzzle girl. I don't think I. I don't think I could slay a puzzle. I love a puzzle, but I think, like, I don't, like, imagine just one night of, like, being freezing cold in the rain. Oh, bugs. You can't go on Survivor.

[B]

I know. I was just thinking about, like, what I would have to do. I think I'd have to get, like, hypnotized against bugs because other than that, I would slay down.

[A]

I heard hypnotism works.

[B]

I should. I really should. My bug fear controls my life. You know this.

[A]

I also Beat Olivia Kaiser in a push up competition one time.

[B]

Stop saying that because I just know you didn't.

[A]

I. On. On God. I'll insert the video.

[B]

Was she hammered?

[A]

I'll insert the. No. And today. I made her say it on the phone today to evidence because.

[B]

So then you need to go on this.

[A]

I did.

[B]

That's enough.

[A]

But she, I mean, she's obviously just like way stronger than me in like literally every way. But for some reason I beat her in a push up competition.

[B]

I think.

[A]

And there are witnesses.

[B]

I think that would be so good for you. Like, I really do.

[A]

I do too. That are rehab so. Or like. Or like a retreat, I should say a retreat. I'm not on drugs.

[B]

Yeah, big difference. Seriously.

[A]

Every idea starts with a problem. Warby Parker's was simple. Glasses are too expensive. So they set out to change that. By designing glasses in house and selling directly to customers, they're able to offer prescription eyewear that's expertly crafted and unexpectedly affordable. Warby Parker glasses are made from premium materials like impact resistant polycarbonate and custom acetate. And they start at just $95, including prescription lenses. Get glasses made from the good stuff. Stop by a Warby Parker store near you. Something huge happened last night. Absolutely massive and huge and insane and amazing. Trisha Paytas went on snl.

[B]

I just saw this clip today. I just got chills. Like actual football.

[A]

Multiple clips. There are multiple clips. She manifested this. She is the queen, the best in the world, I would venture to say, at like speaking things into existence. Like she has said literally on record, like, I am going to be on snl. I want to be on snl. I want to host snl. And last night she. Not only was she on snl, but she was on SNL as Trisha Paytas, which is like the coolest thing in the entire world.

[B]

And iconic.

[A]

With first of all, Paul Mezcal, who I'm. I would literally, I would do anything for you.

[B]

I love you so much.

[A]

And with David Spade, who she loves more than anyone on this saw.

[B]

It's one thing to be the queen of manifestation and everyone is like supporting that. She has had so many people tell her that she cannot do the things that she is doing to the point that she has lived almost in this, like belief. Like it's, it's jaded her thoughts towards herself as well. And just to see her, to see her achieve her dreams is like, I can't even like put it into words. Like I genuinely cannot even put it into words. It is so beautiful and Magical and like, it is and she deserves it.

[A]

It's just amaz. Amazing.

[B]

It's one thing when someone is speaking words of inspiration, but her life story to me is so inspiring to like, just girls. Just girls who don't get dealt the best cards and girls that society isn't the best too. And I'm just like, I can't even believe. And I'm just imagining Moses like filming her.

[A]

It just. Oh my God. I literally, I can't believe she. She just stepped out and did it too. I feel like she's like that recently or like, at least like, from my perspective.

[B]

It's like I have a podcast with her and I did not know she was going.

[A]

Yeah. Like, just randomly she'll pop out doing the craziest thing and you're like, trisha, how? Like, yeah. Katy Perry Music Video 100.

[B]

It's like, how does she have the time too? It's like, I'm just so proud of her. Like, I just feel like she's so hard working though.

[A]

I feel like, like obviously we talk about how like she's iconic and stuff, like all the time, but like, no one talks about how, like, she literally, like, how does she have enough hours in the day? Like she. By. By morning she's Jasmine in Aladdin and then she's like working in a tavern all day and then she puts out 17 episodes in at once. Like, she's really hard working it.

[B]

No, it's.

[A]

Maybe that's the difference between her.

[B]

Working with her on like, not Loveline has been so cool. Like, she is. Britney, my manager and I were just talking about this. Like, just like she, she's on the email, she's on her zoom. Like, it's like I just. It's so crazy. I feel like I do have kind of a lot of people that like, help me and do a lot of things for it. And like Britney, my manager was saying that she'll just like see Trisha in her inbox every day and she's like, what the of like, yeah, she doesn't.

[A]

Have like a lot of like, help. But she, she doesn't and is the best mother wanted. That's. But I was gonna say I.

[B]

Two kids.

[A]

Yeah. Which is crazy. I feel like this is a good example of what I've tried to tell you before. It's like I do think like having children, like, obviously you like feel a sense of purpose, but like, not even just like, like your purpose is being a mother. It's like all of a sudden you know exactly like what you want and like, who. What direction you want to go in. It is like, that happened to her. Like, I feel like, like, since having Malibu, like, just everything, like, she's been so intentional with what she's done.

[B]

I agree. I mean, I can't imagine, like, having a kid probably does just make you really realize what is important and what's not. Even just with being with Mokoa, I feel like I. It's made me realize in so many ways. Like, just the amount before him, like, just, like, the amount of side quests I was on. I don't mean people either. That makes me sound like a whore.

[A]

No, but, like, I was thinking about this because I was. I was thinking, like, how it went so quickly, like, the one year. But I feel like he's just made you, like. Like, he's shown, like, your potential. You always, like, you were always capable of being sober for this long, and you've always, like, had this, like, soft, like, feminine side, but he, like, brought it out of you. I feel like that's really sweet.

[B]

I couldn't agree.

[A]

I think it was really hard for me to say. I, like, really have a hard time saying nice things.

[B]

It's. I really do, like, feel that way. Like, it's nuts. It's like you never want to feel like you're living for someone, but even with, like, the sobriety and just different stuff. Like, like, not only do I want to be the best version of myself for myself, but I now want to be the best, like, girlfriend, wife, mother, one day. Like, for someone else as well. Like, you know, and it's really cool. And it does. Yeah, it's nuts. You're right. I can't imagine the next level. Like, having kids and just. Yeah, it's crazy.

[A]

I feel like becoming a parent makes you, like, super.

[B]

Mako and I lately have been having really, actually serious, definitive conversations about, like, when we want kids, which is kind of crazy. And it's. I. It's looking like the 30s.

[A]

Let me know.

[B]

Oh, it's looking like the 31s and twos.

[A]

I'm. I'm 28. And, you know, people will not let me forget that I am almost 30. It's like, I want to say I'm 28, but, like, everyone's always, like, pushing 30, so I'm pushing 30. And what's wrong with that? Everyone says your life starts in your 30s.

[B]

I think it does. I think your 20s is all about figuring things out. And your 30s, I'm assuming, is about the things you figured out. Yeah.

[A]

And I Like reject everybody I met before. Like age 21.

[B]

So 100.

[A]

Something bad happened.

[B]

What happened?

[A]

They passed a Tick Tock ban in the United States.

[B]

I'm so stoked.

[A]

It's so crazy that you say that, because I'm happy about it too. I wonder if we're happy about it for different reasons.

[B]

Probably. I'm just kidding. Sorry that I did not mean that in the way that that came off. No, I did not.

[A]

But you were exactly right.

[B]

I did not mean that in the way that that came off. Off.

[A]

And you were not wrong.

[B]

I used to not be. And like, listen to me. If you go through the Chick Fil a drive thru in a couple months and you see me asking you, you know, spicy deluxe or regular? Mind your own damn business.

[A]

Stolen joke. Stolen dollar.

[B]

I love stolen joke. Stolen valor.

[A]

Stolen joke alert.

[B]

We do not do that enough. I mean career wise. But then to me it's just like there's gonna be another app next week, you know, if it happens. So it's like it doesn't scare me in that way. For me it's just like I do feel like the brain rot. Like, oh, brain rot is a funny joke. But like I am dumber. I am walking around my house all day. Suitcase, suitcase, suitcase. I like my suitcase, suitcase. Like shut up. I'll tell you what, get a slower attention span, bitch.

[A]

The most dangerous thing about that is that I felt all along that it was making me smarter. Like there I have gone on record and said like I have learned so much since having downloaded Tick Tock. But it's like how many times have you guys heard me like speak something as absolute truth that is just completely made up?

[B]

No. And it's like I, I, it's cool that I know about Mu Dang, but I don't need to know about Mu Dang. Do you know what I mean?

[A]

And it's like we're focusing on the wrong thing things.

[B]

It's, I think it's just too much. Like I was literally about to sit here and talk to you about like burr, basket, gate and like that nurse mom who's an awful mom, like, and it's like, yes, those things are being brought to our attention so now we discuss them. But I'm just imagining the amount like the terabyte of free space I could have up here without Tick Tock.

[A]

Because it's just like in time, just.

[B]

Time, like watching one full YouTube video is now like so significantly better for your brain and attention span and focus and knowledge and what? Like it's just I think that I would be a better, smarter person with a terabyte of free space.

[A]

I think so too. I just, I'm grateful that like, because a lot of influencers that that's their primary like and only big platform, you know what I mean? Like, or like Tick Tockers or like people who like, like the beauty girls or stuff. Like people who don't do long form content. Like, I'm grateful that we have a podcast and stuff, but I would be like really freaking out, honestly if I.

[B]

Was like, I think that that's about like belief and I don't know, like, I guess self belief because if you think about it, even when vine died, all of the people who were still.

[A]

Yeah, but like, businesses depend on it. Like, I do feel like a lot of people are gonna like take a hit from it. It's true.

[B]

But I also think so much short form stuff will then just move to reels or shorts. Like.

[A]

Yeah, but like, that's my biggest fear. Like, please don't, please don't put. I don't want to be real. I don't want to be real.

[B]

I don't know though.

[A]

I don't want to be reeling.

[B]

YouTube shorts are reals. My 4 user just so different, I guess because I don't use them. So never mind. But I don't know, all I see.

[A]

Is AI on Instagram reels. And the problem is I can't detect AI. So I'm like, oh my God, look at this baby walking down the Runway. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I can't, I have no gauge for that. Like I'm like a 50 year old or like 60, 80 year old woman. I'm like, that is so cute that, that cat and that elephant are getting along.

[B]

That purple ocean is gorgeous. Yeah, I feel you. Oh my God. But like, no, I think, I think Tick Tock being banned would be more beneficial than not. I think there are beneficial aspects of it, but I don't know, I think.

[A]

Just mental health, honestly, that's like my actual thing. Like, I don't know if that's what you were alluding to before, but like Tick Tock is so scary. Like it's crazy. It's crazy for me to be able to like open Tick Tock and then like actually want to like self harm.

[B]

Obviously as influencers. Yes. Like we're opening a vault to perception of us.

[A]

No, I don't even just mean that. But like things you see and like it's my, like at the drop of a dime, like I can My entire like mental state can be changed.

[B]

I was just literally. That's what I was just gonna say. Like the fact that it's like a video that's going to make you sob and then a video that's going to make you want to buy something and then.

[A]

Yeah, there's got to be like a weird substance style movie about that.

[B]

Yeah. Like, it's like you shouldn't be feeling that range of. And just the way it has made. Like I'm watching a movie and I'm like, can we get a bass boost? Like it's like, like you need like.

[A]

Someone making slime on the side.

[B]

Yes. Like, I would literally need Subway Surfer beside Interstellar to enjoy it. And that's pathetic. I, I just. I don't know. It feels regressive and I'm. I. Whatever.

[A]

There's just no long term, like psychological studies on like what short form content is like doing to us. You know what I mean?

[B]

Got to be just sodomizing. Why'd I use that? Our dopamine receptors.

[A]

I don't know what that means because they don't tell me that.

[B]

I think it's like butt bad. Bad butt stuff.

[A]

Oh, it's got.

[B]

But it's just got to be bad for our dopamine receptors, you know? Well, I'm not. I can't talk or an influencer anymore. I'm an actress.

[A]

How'd that go? Did you act?

[B]

I have been on the side quest of a century and I don't know if I'm allowed to talk about it. My new bit lately has just been side quests for joy. I went and did a Kevin Lang video and I think it's like with all these. They're hilarious. If you've never watched Kevin Lang, he is so. This has nothing to do with me acting. I don't know.

[A]

Talk about whatever you want.

[B]

This.

[A]

You know what? That's the privilege of having a podcast.

[B]

Make the equipment more expensive. I went into the Kevin Lang video and he does jubilee style videos. But like, guess the bald person and like they're all in morph suits type. Like it's so. And all the people on his panel are comedians, stand up comedians. So it's actually so funny. And it was like the funniest day of my life. And I was like, I might just around and start doing stand up. Like I've just been on a serious side quest. But anyways, I. I talked about this in the last episode, but something hit my inbox asking me to audition for something that I absolutely could not say no to. And you know how I feel about acting. I think if someone told me it's a mental block. It is a mental block. But, like, if someone said, you need to make an album by the end of next week, like, I would genuinely find that easier. You need to write a book in. You know, like, it's just. I really find acting to be so hard. And I get this role and it's funny. The role to me feels like I'm playing almost like Natalie Bowling. Like, I'm very, like, wispy. And everything I say, say is with serious conviction. Like, no, really, there's an elephant in the other room. Like, you know, like, that's like my vibe and, like, my. Just the characters, it's so, like, not me. You know what I mean? And so I hire this acting coach and I'm like, really trying to take this seriously. And it's so nuts to me that even because you wanted to act at one point, like, yeah, it wasn't going well, but it's like, even just memorizing pages of conversation, like, the fact that you have to, like, know where your eyelines are and be listening to people and thinking about how you're reacting and your facial expressions and your hands and where they go, and I lose all ability to inflect my words. It is so insane. The. The line could genuinely be like, I'm Tana Mojo and I have a podcast. And I'm gonna be sitting here like, I'm Tana Mojo and I have a podcast.

[A]

But that's what I'm saying. It's a mental block because you are like, you do it all the time without knowing that you're acting. But, like, because you know you're going into this and like, thinking like, Makoa.

[B]

Went on this whole tangent to me where he was like, I watch you see people that you hate every single day, and you walk up to them like they are your long lost cousin. Okay, I don't. Wow.

[A]

Hey, that's called being nice.

[B]

That's. Yes, that's la. Okay. Obviously I have my people all around me that I love. But I'm just saying a lot of. You know what I mean? I don't fucking know or just. I'm always doing something that I don't want to be doing and I have to act like I love doing it. And that's just. It is what it is.

[A]

The live shows are acting, acting. Like, I haven't heard this story before.

[B]

That's fair. But just a lot of what I do, like, even just Again, going into a meeting and pretending to be really excited about whatever I'm meeting about. Maybe it's like, the last place on earth I want to be. I don't know. Whatever. And all of my life is also about and always has been about performing on camera and giving this best, funny side of myself on camera, whether I'm feeling it or not. Like, on days where I feel like I'm still gonna come on and be in it. And that's acting almost. It's the hardest thing in the world for me. And I've realized that the only way I can pull this off is by method acting.

[A]

Tana, wait. Did you. I was literally the. I'm holding myself back from saying it because I'm so bad at, like, not cutting people off. But I wanted to say that, like, I feel like you should do what, like, Jim Carrey did. You'd have to, like, turn into the person. Because I feel like that's the issue is, like, you're so good at being Tana Mojo that, like, in order to become Sonic the Hedgehog, you would have to be Sonic the Hedgehog.

[B]

Brooke. I was making mokoa call me my character's name. I'll bleep it, but her name is okay. What the. Like, and I'm walking around for days just like, do you think we could maybe get a latte? Like, I really want a latte. Like, we should. Oh, I'm so happy to podcast. Like, literally, I walk into this audition, and, you know me, like, I'm very, like, fee fi fo fuming.

[A]

You physically had to go in and audition. Oh, my God, I can't fit. Were you so nervous?

[B]

I walk in. I. As a sociopath, baby. You know, Paige was like, what the. I get in Paige's car, and I'm like, thanks for picking me up. Like, how are you? Like, just whole night I walk in, I'm like, I'm just. And you know, this isn't, like, me at all. I'm doing this to all the directors and pages watching me. I'm like, I'm just so nervous. Like, I just can't believe I get to be here, like, fully committed to the bit the whole way through. Like, I love that.

[A]

So much water.

[B]

I'm like, thank you so much. Like, my voice never left this octave. Like, I just was, like, this honestly hired murderer.

[A]

I, like, when do you find out? Do you know already?

[B]

I don't know. I think I gave it my all, and I still think I was kind of shitty.

[A]

Did you see Maxine No.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

That's what I'm picturing. I'm picturing you going into that big warehouse right now and just sitting down and doing your monologue and getting out of there.

[B]

That is so funny.

[A]

And you said you go to all the girls. Don't bother. I crushed it.

[B]

That's exactly what Ashley said. That's so funny. She was saying the exact same thing. I don't know. They kept following up with me, like, I couldn't do one of the days to audition. And they were like, no, we've got to get her in. And they were.

[A]

They probably had a good. Like, I feel like you have a good shot at this.

[B]

I just. I'm like, it's funny because I want to get it for, like, the other people that are in this project. And, like, I'm imagining the. The premiere and the carpet and, like, my friends all watching. I'm imagining all the pros. But when it comes to actually having to do this, I hope I don't get it. I hope someone else who wants it.

[A]

I think, because, like, in the moment, it's not like, you're not, like, on stage or something. It's like, it's very much like. Like, this, like. Or, like, other things are going on, and, like, no one's really paying attention to what you're doing. And, like, you can, like, just drill through it, like, a billion times with, like, Paige or something, and, like, you'll just have it.

[B]

I literally don't even think I could with Paige. Like, I think it would have to be major acting coach. And my memory, I really bad, like, but that's goldfish brain.

[A]

But it's not goldfish brain. It's like, you're thinking of it, I feel like, as acting. And trust me, I am no actress. I'm like, no, no.

[B]

But I appreciate.

[A]

But the difference, like, it's like, if I were to read something in Spanish, like, I don't speak Spanish, so I can't, like, memorize. It's way harder for me to memorize something, but if I understood what it said, like, I could memorize it more easily. Like, you're not paying attention to, like, what the scene actually is versus, like, memorizing the words.

[B]

I don't remember, like, the first, like, five years of, like, knowing Amari.

[A]

Like.

[B]

Like. Like, I. Like, you know what I mean? Like, you're really underestimating my, like, how shitty my memory is. So it's really hard for me.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I think that everything that I've ever done, like, for the most part, Major, big things. Like, things as big as, like, acting in a movie or a show, per se. Right. I've wanted. And I think that it makes me, like, the feeling that I leave. Like, even just after this audition, I was watching all the girls outside, like, practicing their lines, and, like. You know what I mean? Like, even it makes me want to cry thinking about it right now. It makes me really sad because it is the tale as old as time of an influencer being handed something that they do not deserve. Like, even just on my way to the audition down the street, I'm thinking about people, people who fly across the country for one shot at this to get rejected 30,000 times to then, like, maybe one in 1,000, finally getting it. Like, I don't want this and I don't deserve it, and I shouldn't have it for that reason. Like, it makes me, like, sad.

[A]

I don't think it means you don't deserve it. Like, I don't know, sometimes, like. Like this particular role, like, knowing what I know about the role, like, it calls for, like, you or, like, someone alike. You know what I mean?

[B]

I agree. But even that. Then I just.

[A]

Still.

[B]

Even an influencer wants it is better than. Yeah. Me, who's just taking it so I can serve at the premiere. Like, you know, it's like, yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And maybe. Who knows? I do think everything happens for a reason. Like, maybe I'll end up enjoying it and liking it, and it's a whole different life, and it's met what's meant to be.

[A]

Will, I think you would do so well in it. I feel like there's so many things that I, like, could have seen you in, and it's just fun. Like, it'll. You'll. You'd be nervous, like, the first time you do it, and then after that, you're just not anymore. The same thing as, like, a live show. Like, a live show was terrifying for me the first time. And then after that, you've done it.

[B]

I know. I guess I'm just passionate about performing for a crowd. I think you hit the nail on the head in the sense that I am. I'm so, like, neck deep in being Tana Mongeau that it is really hard for me to, like. And I've just always been passionate about things that do revolve around, I don't know, my own personality when I. And, like, acting is such a talent. I can't stress that enough. And, like, I think that it. And the fact that people do memorize all the lines and their eye Lines and where their hands are supposed to be.

[A]

It's like.

[B]

And they're blinking and their inflection and all of that. And then a movie will come out and then people will still say that their acting was so horrible. That is so hard. It's like I think so vaulting.

[A]

Trust me, I was horrible and everybody knows it. But like, for example, like Amanda, Amanda Diaz lives next door and she like is constantly doing self tapes. And so who has to self tape with her? Me. Okay. So by the time I've gone through this so many times, I am Susie on the other end of this scene. You know what I mean? So I've been practicing. Okay. And I think I could play it.

[B]

It is. I can't even stress. It's. I think it's the hardest thing in the world. My hats go off, especially to just people who can really like, it's amazing.

[A]

But people who like take it there, like with characters that are so unrealistic like, like or become like such completely different people from like movie to movie. There are some actors who like always play like some version of themselves. Blake Lively says this like when she was doing like the press for it ends with us. Like she was saying, like she's always played like people similar enough to her.

[B]

Like, I almost feel like it would be easier to be like.

[A]

I'm trying to think of someone who's a good example who's played like. Like Reese Witherspoon is like, she's always going to be like a. A cute like blonde, bubbly Jennifer Coolidge.

[B]

Like Adam.

[A]

Yeah. Like people get time typecast. But there's some actors that are like actually just completely transformative and they like become completely different people.

[B]

I feel like Margot Robbie. Leonardo. Yeah.

[A]

Margot Robbie is like amazing for like Tanya I. Tonya versus Barbie.

[B]

Like like that insane. I also just want to say in my one week of side quest acting, all the people who have some to say about like Austin. What's his name? Austin Butler becoming Elvis and Ariana Grande becoming Galinda. Like I'm already like. Like just in my one week I'm like, can I Like, it's like if I actually end up doing this and I come back as a completely different person, I completely understand why you're like for 18 hours a day you're being someone else and then the other 12, you're just thinking about how tomorrow you have to go be that someone else again and commit to it. Like, no wonder, Austin. But I would Baby hunka hunka burn in love. I would think I was elvis, too. What?

[A]

100 and I.

[B]

You don't have time to be Austin.

[A]

I really. I get. Exactly. Honestly, I've experienced this in just regular life because of how often I've completely adopted my personality by accident and then just. It stuck. And that's why you guys have seen so many versions of me.

[B]

It's just, I. I can't even believe, you know, this is my last night in this house, in our last podcast on the gray couch. And I don't know. So this couch is coming, but it's going in the movie.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So we can do, like, we can sit on this couch still, but from all further episodes will be from your.

[A]

House and see this again.

[B]

Yeah. Which is kind of wild because I feel like, yes, we shot this podcast from many other places, but this feels like we've been through the most up here on this couch, you know, and just. Even. Just people like that girl on tour who, like, drew this.

[A]

Oh, that was so cute.

[B]

On, like, she drew this amount of couch and us sitting like this. And I don't know. I'm just thinking about all the. I don't know why. In my mind, the one thing I'm thinking about is, like, you want to be on the podcast, Alyssa? I don't know why that's coming to my mind.

[A]

Oh, my gosh. I literally talked to her yesterday.

[B]

No way.

[A]

By accident.

[B]

I keep having this recurring dream that her and I like fist fight.

[A]

Really?

[B]

I am that angry. I'm still. I still feel really.

[A]

I'm not that angry. You know what? It's different. I'm feeling a lot less angry lately. Like, I feel like there's a lot of people I reamed into, like, a little too hard who I like probably. Like, I should have reevaluated my situations at that time.

[B]

For the most part, I think I'm the opposite of you. Like, do you know what I mean? Like, anytime I spoke up about someone on this podcast, I meant what I said. I meant.

[A]

I meant what I said. But I. Sometimes I feel like I'm. I'm so emotional and, like, I feel things so deeply that it was like, it was actually never that deep. You know what I mean? Like, and there's people who, like, I really just cooked.

[B]

I think. Okay, I get what you're saying, and.

[A]

It wasn't that deep.

[B]

I think anytime I was talking about a person, I pretty much like what I was feeling. Like, I. I still feel.

[A]

Well, I feel like you usually, like, see things for exactly as they are, and I see things for what they are absolutely not.

[B]

That's fair. And like, I don't know. Alyssa. Alyssa was just personal and years of feeling a type of way and like, whatever. So that's a personal. I. Do you know which one I have been thinking about a lot lately though, that I think I would do differently is Britney Broski.

[A]

Like, I. Yeah, I saw her at the Gladiator premiere and I, like, wanted to be like, oh, my God, I'm such a big fan. But then I was like, oh, she hates you.

[B]

I think that.

[A]

And by you, I mean, I mean me. Like, I don't mean.

[B]

Well, you. I mean, I think I was just personally offended by the way that that text was worded. But now hindsight 20 20, like, like, no, Brittany Broski doesn't want to come on the canceled podcast and she was.

[A]

Really ahead of her time.

[B]

Let her cook. Like, I obviously still should have never said the. The wine lady's name, but that's. That's really it for me.

[A]

That was pretty bad. I think. I just.

[B]

I think I just wish I could.

[A]

Have turned the volume down on myself for a couple things. Do you know what I'm saying?

[B]

Like, so that's so, so, so fair.

[A]

Like, I wish, like, I, I sack saying, shouldn't have been so loud. You know what I mean? Matt Rife. Shouldn't have been so loud. Clinton Kane, turn it up.

[B]

Well, that's just. That's you, sweetie. You feel zero or 100, you know?

[A]

I know, and that's my bad. But you know what? I'm slaying this medication journey. Contrary to popular belief.

[B]

Your medicine is the best thing that ever happened. Ever, ever happened. And I love you so much for it. Like, slate down, feeling amazing.

[A]

Have you ever been to the Rose Bowl? No, I went to the Rose bowl this morning.

[B]

You've been doing a lot of, like, jingle ball Rose Bowl.

[A]

I know. I thought the Rose bowl was a football game, which, me too. Imagine my dismay when I got there and it was a flea market.

[B]

Like, I'm imagining it in an arena.

[A]

It was. It's an arena, but it's like a. It's a flea market in the arena. So it's like, that's just so enormous and it's so huge. But they have just the coolest stuff. Like, you would have the best day ever. But I regret not bringing my wagon because you need a wagon if you're going to get things there. Because it's like, what are you going to carry, like a coffee table around?

[B]

Like, where is it? In Pasadena?

[A]

It's In Pasadena. It's at the Rose Bowl.

[B]

But say I live in la, but it's like I just go to the same six places.

[A]

Well, I didn't even know what it was. Apparently everybody knows.

[B]

I feel like you're always just doing something. You're always on, like, a side quest. In la, though, like, you really make the most of living in L. A?

[A]

Well, I have a lot. Most of my best friends here are from la, so they, like.

[B]

Oh, so they like, take you to things that are not as, like.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Or just.

[A]

They just, like, know where to go or, like, everything. But there were so many, like, just funny things. Oh, by the way, what made me think of it is because I was looking for my lip gloss a second ago. Tell me why. I have this Wells Fargo belt that I got today.

[B]

What do you mean, Wells?

[A]

It's a belt with a Wells Fargo.

[B]

I really need that since everyone thinks I'm a bank.

[A]

You do.

[B]

With this house just every day, that's. I'm just swipe. Delicious galore. Just. And everything cost $17,000. I don't know if you knew, but when you're buying a house, everything cost $117,000. Yeah.

[A]

You don't realize how many things you have to pay for, too. When you buy a house, which is.

[B]

Everything cost $177,000 when you're buying a house, everything.

[A]

That's so crazy.

[B]

Although everything needs insurance, by the way.

[A]

You're going to.

[B]

Why does the grass need insurance? I trust that the grass will be fine.

[A]

I shouldn't. We're in la. There's droughts.

[B]

No, I know. No, there's. There's drought insurance, there's fire insurance, there's gutters, There's.

[A]

It is hard. But once. I'm telling you right now, once the dust settles, you're going to be so grateful. Sitting in your house and knowing I still have this money, except it's in the shape of a bathtub.

[B]

I do completely agree. I think it's finally the way I process emotion is so different. Like, I'm just now being, wow, I bought a house.

[A]

I'm so happy for you.

[B]

It's crazy.

[A]

I've been wanting you to do this, literally, since the day we met.

[B]

I just want to say, though, to every single person who said to me, like, you are so stupid. You haven't bought property. It's so easy. Suck me.

[A]

That visual was worse than the orange.

[B]

It is the. It's the hardest thing I've ever done. It is the hardest process. I think that it's it's the tale is all the time that I always say that I have amazing luck but horrible luck. Like where like I'm so lucky I can buy a house. But like every single thing that's going to go wrong is going to go wrong.

[A]

Like the thing that can go wrong will go wrong. That's Murphy's Law.

[B]

In the final. I don't even know if I want to like go into this, but in the final days, in the final days and I don't. I just want to let you guys know as well when I say like it's so hard. The anxiety, anxiety of being in escrow is some of the most heightened anxiety. Like it's like you put your all your money on the table. You know what I mean? And it's just like you're waiting for this to close and it to be yours. You don't have a move in date. Like when you have a lease. That's so horrifying. Like, I don't know when. Just let me just. I don't know. Sure. Just whenever everything falls through to the point that I think after months of touring houses, after finally finding the one after the escrow being done, like everything people say don't fall in love with the house till. You know what I mean? Until it's like you can't back out. Right. And so I'm in this stage now where I can't back out and like the worst case scenario happens to me where like I can lose this house. Right? And I'm just sobbing every day. I'm on the phone for fucking like 18 hours a day. And the reasoning was because four years ago I bought someone a car. And I know how crazy is that? Just a good deed. I still stand on it. I love her.

[A]

No good deed goes unpunished.

[B]

She didn't even do anything wrong either. Like, I don't even want people would like go find her, reach out or anything because it's just like I bought her a car and I love her so much. And now like you know, she, she doesn't work with me anymore. She's still one of my best friends. She didn't do anything wrong either. Like she would never hurt me or me over in any way of her if there was a gun to her head and it was like tana over, she would die. Like, and I, I know that, I believe you know that. Like, you know, and just the car, she ended up totally in the car. And it somehow affected me so horribly. And then the people that I pay to be on Top of these things.

[A]

Missed it.

[B]

Had a vacation for 10 months while it just sat and me every month. And so then the owner of this house, who's selling it to me is like, hey, you close?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I have someone waiting with cash. More cash.

[A]

No more. Who? Kill them.

[B]

More cash than you. More cash waiting to buy this house. Right.

[A]

Who has more cash than you know, but someone.

[B]

And so then I have to start paying the owner of this house $15,000 a day on top of the purchase price until I can do it for, like, weeks. Like, just, oh, well, I'm so happy it's done. But to everyone, it's just so crazy that I was 21 and people were being like, why haven't you bought a house yet? I wasn't smart enough. Like, I don't know.

[A]

I'll. There's an element to it, too, where this is, like, a different house buying process than like. Like the average Joe, because it's a big, huge, enormous mansion.

[B]

I don't. But I don't. It's like, Jake Paul bought a $10 million house when he was, like, 18. I don't really, but I just think. I don't know, like, even Bella Thornton. I just. I'm trying to think of all the people I know who just bought houses, and it was so easy for them, but, like, for me and my circumstances, I'm so happy I waited. I also would have bought a house in, like, the shape of a flower, you know, I hate this is.

[A]

That's the worst thing about, like, life in general is, like, tastes changing. Like, that's how I, like, I fear for that in relationships. I fear for that in everything. Because it's like, if I still wanted what I wanted five years ago, Like, I don't. Of course I don't.

[B]

So happy I didn't.

[A]

So it's like, how can you commit to anything?

[B]

Even just now, all the houses, like, I. I don't know if I've said this, but, like, the house that I'm buying, like, I'm not madly in love with. Like, I bought. I'm buying the thing that is the best investment.

[A]

It's gonna be through and amazing.

[B]

The house is. I. Lovely.

[A]

In love with it, and that's what really matters.

[B]

That's true. The houses that I loved, though, like, all ev. I fell in love with this house. I still think about it, but it was a horrible investment. And, like, I'm just thinking about what I would have bought in those eras, and it's like, I'm so glad I didn't I don't know.

[A]

Well, I'm excited for our little new chapter. Hopefully we have a set. I feel like it's gonna. It just marks, like, the start.

[B]

This is the end of my life as I knew it, I think, in a lot of ways. And it's good. It's a very. It's the newest chapter. I feel like I felt since I moved to la. So I'm.

[A]

I'm ex. I'm very excited for you. And what perfect timing with your one year in a. Like, it's just perfect.

[B]

It really. It really like. It does. I feel this chapter, it's. It's great. But I wanted to talk about that moment. Who won't buy her kid a winter coat? I have so much to fucking say. Stupid, stupid bitch.

[A]

We should do it on Patreon.

[B]

We should go over to the Patreon, because I do. I have a lot of other topics. I also think I'm losing my mind and. Or a psychic. Like, I'm either schizophrenic or psychic, and there's no in between.

[A]

I'm sorry, hold on one second.

[B]

In the meadow, we can build a snowman. All right, guys, we're gonna head on over to the Patreon because there are, like, nine people on my for you page that I need to talk about for sure. And we love you so, so, so very much. Happy holiday season. The weather outside is frightful the fire is so delightful. Get me off this mic, seriously. Bye, guys.