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Brooke
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Tana
Hello and welcome back to the canceled podcast.
Paige
Come on, Brooke. One of them.
Justin
No, please, you guys. And you know what? You put me on the spot like that and then everybody's like, she doesn't vibe with them, but it's like, I just don't bark. Like, it's just not really my thing.
Tana
You just like don't want to embarrass yourself publicly. I get it.
Paige
The only reason that I ever was so passionate about you barking is that I think if ask any single person to bark, it says a lot about.
Justin
Them how they decide to bark. Yes, but what does it say about me for me to not decide to bark?
Paige
You're not a dog.
Justin
I'm a self respecting individual, which we have witnessed on this podcast to not be true.
Paige
It's. Well, you're looking at barking as this whole degrading thing.
Justin
Yeah. I feel like you're trying to peg me.
Tana
Like, I feel like I'm like. And what's wrong with that?
Justin
It feels like you're emasculating me. Like you're trying to get me to like, like bar, like, like jump, you know? No, no.
Paige
I think it's empowering.
Justin
I think you're gaslighting. I think this is what you would.
Tana
Say we just growled into the mic.
Justin
Yeah, like, I know, but this is a manipulation tactic and I'm learning to discover them quicker.
Paige
One day she, I just know it. She's gonna get on all fours and fucking.
Justin
When you start howling, I'm gonna be caller and leash.
Tana
When you have like an LAX airport incident like that, you're gonna start barking 100%.
Paige
I can't believe I did that. I really didn't mean to.
Justin
I can. And I loved it. It was one of my favorite Santa Monica stories.
Tana
I wish I.
Paige
It's just so funny because if you were there, you would have beat the brakes off me.
Justin
No, I don't think that's true. I think in that situation, you see how I put. I get it sometimes.
Paige
That's true. That's true. Sometimes you, like, will side with me, but I just all try to side.
Justin
With who I feel is right in the moment.
Tana
You do got that dog in you.
Justin
Yeah.
Tana
Yeah.
Justin
Speaking of.
Paige
Hi, guys. So, first of all, it's crazy slipper day over here.
Justin
Yeah. And I poached Tana's slippers, but I had to because I was having, like, a little bit of an emotional day. So now she let me wear the slippers.
Paige
It's so funny. These ones were for Brook and they're like a size 6. And I feel my toe about. Look at my toe. It's like it has a boner.
Tana
You're about to get, like, busting out.
Justin
It's busting out with my first lady outfit. I'm like, dressed. I'm dressed business casual for the Cancel podcast today.
Tana
We are going to different places right now.
Paige
We are.
Tana
I just rolled out of bed. First of all, I'm so fucking hungover. Second of all, you are running for office. Third of all, you're going to the club.
Paige
So I'm going to Barney's. Beanie.
Justin
I liked it. I think we all dressed on for each of our themes of the day. I got dibs on presidential shooting.
Tana
Oh, I like that. I got dibs on my ex making rounds.
Justin
How dare he?
Paige
My shirt says girl blogging. I don't know what the.
Justin
You got dibs on Patreon drama.
Paige
Oh, my God. Okay, I'm into that.
Tana
I'm into that.
Paige
I can handle it.
Justin
We start with.
Paige
Well, I mean, first of all, here's the goal for today, right? Let's set a goal. We never do that at the beginning of a kiss.
Justin
Yeah.
Paige
I feel like the goal genuinely today is, you know, light hearted, jacking off under the rainbow tarp or having fun with it or silly goofy. Right?
Justin
Yeah.
Tana
These bitches are going to be so sick of me.
Justin
No, I will admit I've had, like, a little bit of a, like. Oh, no. I've really been, like, nailing everyone a little too hard on the Cancel podcast. I've kind of been having bad vibes. And I admit it, you guys. So today's Good vibes.
Paige
I don't think you've been having bad vibes. I don't.
Justin
I think I like personally been having bad vibes. And it's translated on. On like I've been just.
Paige
Well, I think a lot is just happening. I said it in the Alyssa episode last week. Like I would do anything for just two weeks where it was like, we sat here, we're like, what do we talk about? The weather? Like, no one's death threatening me via tasks.
Justin
You said on that episode. It's like they make it too easy. It just like some things just keep popping up out of nowhere. Like a 29 part series from Quentin Cain.
Tana
We have so much to fucking talk about.
Paige
Can you believe I'm.
Tana
I literally can't. Actually, I can because that man, he did his big one.
Justin
Wait, so can. Now I can talk about the voice memo? I never talked about the voice memo. I think I might have mentioned it on Patreon, which we know kwop1 has.
Paige
Clipped, but Brooke is coming up this one account for leaking the Patreon.
Justin
But it's. They leaked our whole live shows. Every live show that they obviously didn't attend. So they have malicious intent. They're going out, seeking out the videos and then posting them, knowing, like doing it. Like, you know it's malicious to give you some. It's not like it's like fun and like flirty, like, oh, I want people to be able to see it. It's like, it's. It's literally like they don't like us and that's why they're doing it. And it bothers me about it.
Paige
I agree with that. And it is hard. I. I know that it's just one of the downfalls that comes with all of this. And listen, I'm about to put my foot into hiring a fucking DMC takedown team. And I think that eventually the Patreon will never get leaked because that's a goal. We appreciate all the people that subscribed and we want to give them something that no one else sees.
Justin
And I don't care if it ends up on TikTok every time I. I'm gonna put my fucking barefoot, bare my barefoot into this Patreon. So that could have been a cool.
Paige
Time for you to bark.
Justin
That would have been a cool time, but it wouldn't.
Tana
Let her rip.
Paige
And also, sorry for cutting you off when you were saying a very important sentence and then I was like, that was a cool time for you to bark. Oh my God. Mute my mind.
Tana
The immediate apology Is crazy.
Justin
No, you nailed it. But, yeah. No, I want to be serious. I really do. Like, I. Patreon is really exciting to me, and I think it's a really fun thing that we're doing. So I'm. I'm still gonna be controversial as on Patreon. Okay.
Paige
100.
Justin
And we appreciate so much, obviously, everybody who's subscribed. You're not gonna regret it. Let me tell you that much at all. And kwap1 is getting deleted immediately.
Tana
She can only do so much. She can't post.
Justin
No. Yeah. Wait till she gets it, finds out her account is banned permanently.
Paige
Attacking one person is just so funny to me.
Justin
I know. I just was like, I'm not gonna be malicious anymore. I'm good vibes only. And I'm like, death to kwop1.
Paige
You know what's funny? Is I almost this guy named Kwop a while ago.
Justin
No.
Paige
So it's like, I swear to God. Whose name is Kwop someone I shouldn't have. And I didn't. I came to my senses. Okay. I'm just saying, every time you say Kwop, I'm like, where is he? You know? Not like, where is he? Where is he? Like, where is he? Like, where is he?
Justin
Yeah.
Tana
Posting on Tick Tock.
Paige
No, clearly, Literally, kwop. We should probably just start with Clinton Keynes.
Justin
Yeah. So then we can get, like, funny.
Paige
And silly and goofy.
Justin
I will say his. His series was silly and goofy. I was going to talk about this voice memo on the podcast, and then I decided I was gonna spare a fan. Okay. Because the fan didn't want to be, like, thrown under the bus or whatever. But then Clinton mentioned this fan in his series, so now the fan feels like, fair game, and it's like a sweet fan who's. Well, they've been playing both sides, like, telling, like, Clinton insight about me and telling me inside about Clinton, but I wasn't gonna stop engaging because I needed the insight about Clinton.
Paige
Very fair.
Tana
Sure.
Justin
And so they sent me a screen recording of this voice memo from Clinton in which he states that he pities me and I am so. Was such a despicable human being for making up all these lies, and he just cannot believe that somebody's life is so miserable that they have to make up these lies. And then at the end of the. The end of the voice. Should I just play it?
Tana
Yeah, yeah.
Justin
At the end of the voice memo, he states, wait you so hard, because.
Paige
I just always want to hit the Wendy Williams death to all of them. And then, like, it's like, you're not Wendy Williams.
Tana
Clap if. Think he should suffer.
Justin
Okay, I'm not gonna play the whole thing. I just want you. It's four. It's a minute long, but I want you to hear the end. What is. I just pity her.
Paige
Like the kind of American life that she has to live to be able to do this.
Justin
The kind of person she has to be.
Tana
It's just sad. I just look at her and I think, how pathetic.
Paige
Like, it's just sad.
Justin
You know what I mean? It's just. It's a bunch of.
Paige
It's just sad. And July 12th, everyone will see.
Tana
Everyone saw.
Justin
But that's. What's the joke. That. That voice memo was taken like three weeks ago. That's how long he was preparing this, like, what he thought was going to be like the drop of the century.
Paige
I didn't even think about that.
Justin
You know what I mean? We thought it was going to be a mom reveal. I thought it was going to be a mom reveal. No, I was ready, everybody, like, wait till July 12. He's doing a mom reveal. Because I had seen that he had been in the Philippines. I was like, oh, he must have like gone to see his mom, done a video or whatever. But no, what I never expected was a fucking 29 part series from Clinton Cain.
Tana
You know what cracks me? It's like every video has 2 million views and like 2000 likes. I'm not every single video for trying.
Justin
But how validating it has been to me to see everybody, like, finally see what I went through. Because there, there are a lot of people who are like, wait, I felt gaslit for a second.
Tana
No, for a second he had me and then I was back. I stepped back to reality. I'm like, wait, he's talking about you guys being at Mel's for actually five hours and not just one. Like, no one cares. Where the fuck is your mom?
Justin
So what's so funny about it too is like, like there's every little thing like, yeah, like you said, he honed in only on all these, like, specific details, but, like, specifically to discredit me as, like a, as a storyteller. Okay. Basically make it seem like I told all of these lies and because of that, I am no longer credible in the story must not be true. And the lies included, like, oh, we got pulled over on the, on the way home from Joshua Tree. Not the way they're like, it was cracking me up to like, like, I can't even explain it.
Tana
And when it came to like the act. Wait, sorry.
Paige
No, Go ahead.
Tana
When it came to, like, the actual issue that everyone's like, okay, what about your mom? It was like a 5 second video being like. And it wasn't actually my mom. It was this woman that I really resonated with and I loved her.
Justin
And he said it was not pathogen or pathological lying like everybody thinks it is. It was one silly answer on a podcast and I regret. Like, I'm like, bless your heart. I never even got through the whole series. I'm still seeing little clips here and there.
Paige
I never watch. I like, skimmed through a couple.
Justin
I'm going to admit there's like a lot of speculation that he fabricated text messages.
Paige
It's not speculation, babe. He used the icloud edit feature in the screenshots and that feature didn't exist when you sent those text.
Tana
Oh, my God.
Justin
But I want to go on record really quick and say I said that shit. Like, what?
Paige
Kid Rock?
Justin
Oh, yeah, duh.
Paige
But no, but I'm saying, like, the dates on the text were missing comments.
Justin
Like some, some. You know what I mean? The Internet was up writing for me almost too hard to the point where I was like, no, guys. Like, we. I sent those texts.
Tana
Yeah, but you didn't say anything bad in those texts. No, that's the gig. And the gag of it all I.
Justin
Went through, like, because obviously I still have. I have a. First of all, I have a Clinton Kane iPhone. Y'all saw it if you were on tour. I have a Clinton Kane iPhone that still has every single tech. It's all my. It's my old phone that I had when I was dating him. So I have all those texts, whatever. And I was finding fights. Like, one time I got in so much trouble because he said, how come you haven't texted me good morning? I go, I don't know. I like, I mean, I just woke up. And he goes, well, you sent me a tick tock at 10:30. Why are you lying to me about when you woke up? It was like this whole fight and it was like I just realized, like, you know what? I was never going to win. But what I loved about his series is that he validated me in ways that I can't even explain. Oh yeah, like he made it so blatantly obvious exactly what it was like to go through that relationship with him.
Tana
It was just so funny because it's like he ended up gaslighting the public.
Paige
He did.
Justin
And some trying to sell for it. And like, I get it. But like, also, even if I. Even if all those like, Lies that are like. Like holes in my story were true. Which they weren't.
Paige
That's the thing is you could make another 40 part series on debunking the. The weird things he honed in on. But it's like, it'd be sad for you to do that because the bigger picture here is why is he honing in on those things?
Justin
Yeah. Well, here's my takeaway from his series is that first of all, like, this has. It's gotten so big that it's like he. We've. We've. Clinton. Clinton Kane is like, we've taken care of it. You know what I mean? I don't even think we have to harp on it.
Paige
I do think there should be petitions for lobotomy.
Justin
Yeah.
Tana
So executions public, like, go fund me.
Paige
But like, if enough people sign up.
Justin
No, this, what I'm saying is like, it's like almost not funny anymore. It's like, you see that? You guys see now that this is a very, very mentally ill man that we need to potentially get admitted somewhere.
Tana
Happen to tarring and feathering people, take them to the town center, stone him to death.
Paige
Guillotine. No, she's right. But you're a. You're the bigger person. I'm loving that.
Justin
I personally, I've gotten my. You know what? I've. I've gotten my vengeance. Like, I feel very validated. I like the whole relationship was so frustrating because there was no third party and nobody to tell him that he was wrong and I was right. And now tens of millions of people have done him and it makes me so grateful in ways that I cannot explain. But I will go on record and say that I did say I wanted to fuck the shit out of Kid Rock and I meant it.
Paige
And you have to. Maybe that's why you haven't done anal yet, because it was meant for Kid Rock. I'm being so fucking.
Justin
I did say nothing's more American than Kid Rock and nothing's more American than anal.
Tana
Oh, my God.
Justin
Both mixed them up. But y'all knew what I meant.
Tana
You have to wait for like the next Fourth of July.
Paige
Kid Cock.
Tana
Kid Cock on the four. I'm sorry.
Justin
All summer long, I'm like, dude, yeah, no, I did, I did say that. And yes, it was disrespectful, but no.
Paige
You were getting cheated on left and right. And you said Kid Rock is hot. Don't even actually even say it was disrespectful.
Brooke
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Alex
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Paige
Warren and Kover called me and they were telling me all these stories of times Clinton came over and was trying to brag to them about cheating on you and they had to like custom. Like Clinton came over and he was like, that's just my whole brand is being toxic. Like Brooke knows what she signed up for so I'm cheating on her and look at this girl and this girl. Like he was trying. They had to like, yeah.
Justin
Alex messaged me the other day and was just like, how crazy is this?
Tana
Honestly, the nicest thing that you could have done was just say that you would fuck the shit out of Kid Rock because you could have done way worse.
Justin
I know I should have cheated on him the whole time.
Paige
Got 100%. I responded to the series and I just said like, I don't feel any different about him after watching it. Like nothing new has changed in my opinion. I knew he was going to do exactly that. I thought he would at least do it from like Brunei or something. I thought there'd be a spunky twist. However, like that's just lack of budget and production. I knew it was going to be just like that.
Justin
It does make me feel like weirdly sad that nobody cared about him enough to get him to not post that.
Tana
Seriously, like, where's the PR team?
Justin
No Seriously, Like, I mean, first of all, I don't have a PR team, so he definitely doesn't have a PR team. You know what I mean? No offense, but, like, he, you know, like, there's no reason he would have a PR team. And it makes me sad that his manager, like, someone there had to be.
Paige
He would need Kris Jenner herself to save him PR wise. Like, there's. There's no PR team.
Justin
I know that makes me feel a little bit of, like. I don't want to say guilt. It's not guilt, but I feel like it's okay, we got. I got my vengeance. Everyone move forward.
Paige
It's just hard. It's just like. It is just so shocking and it, like, I don't know, but you have.
Justin
To, like, yeah, I'd be psycho if I was watching this all happen. And being like, he, like, this is funny. It's not funny. It's really horrible.
Paige
But I appreciate your empathy. I do appreciate your empathy, and I think it's beautiful. And it attests to who you are as a person.
Tana
Yeah. The fact that you and your character. Guilt over any of this is beyond.
Justin
It's hard. It's. It's because it's not go. I felt guilt forever. I didn't want to ever say anything, but now it's like, it's gen. You know what it.
Paige
What?
Justin
You know what it is, Paige?
Tana
In the hands of the public.
Justin
I look at him and I just pity him because how miserable. I love the UNO reverse, too, to tell these lies. And it just. It does make me sad. He sat there and made a fucking Google Calendar and like, all these things to validate. What makes me sad is he believe. He genuinely believes what he's saying and still, like, he watched all of that back and wholeheartedly believed that he was right and I was wrong. And that is. That is a mental illness that I didn't even know existed until I said.
Paige
And I'll say it again, I think he's right where you left him. And that within itself is so sad. Like, I've always said that certain people's lives are their own punishment. And yeah.
Justin
And I listen honestly in. I don't know what he could do to come back from it, but take a second call your therapist and tell her that your mom's alive because she's not. She's not helping you with the wrong.
Paige
I've always said. Like, I think in this scenario, from a PR standpoint, the best case for him, and I mean this with everything in me, would have Been to come online and tell the truth.
Tana
Just.
Paige
Yeah, like, I didn't believe in my. Like, you're.
Justin
He's digging his heels in and it's like, why?
Paige
Yeah, I didn't believe in myself. I didn't believe in my music. I didn't believe in my ability to be a boyfriend. I made these things up. I came from a world where it caused me to maybe have these illnesses, like pathologically lying and gas or whatever the fuck, you know? Like, I think if he owned up to it, yes, people would be so angry, but it would create a world for a new leaf to be turned over and growth to be shown. And that's the only thing that could garner any form of respect in this scenario, in my opinion. Right.
Justin
I think it was played so hard. If he got on, he was like, yeah, fuck, seriously.
Tana
If he just handled that shit, like, sketch. If he was like, cat out of the bag.
Justin
Like, wait, can you.
Paige
I did have sexual relations with all those women that weren't from Schofield.
Tana
And he's like, let's address the elephant in the room. My mom's alive.
Justin
I don't know what party got to his mom, but it was like part, part. Like 28.
Paige
Like, that within itself is just.
Justin
And also, ask me how many. How many videos out of 29. He had an Australian accent.
Paige
Like, baby, that's part one.
Tana
Yeah, like, open with that. No one gives a about Mel's Diner.
Justin
But ordered the whole menu just to stay longer.
Tana
Quentin Kane, you are an embarrassment.
Paige
I just saw this video today of. Do you remember when he performed at that after party event? And I was just laughing. Like, we're all, like, sobbing to his music. Like, the belief in him that we all had, like, and it.
Justin
But it's. You know what? It's like. It's almost like it, like, actually made him work. Like, he was so talented at the time and that. It's like, I don't want to say that because, like, there's all these videos going viral of him, like, performing, like, badly and stuff, and it actually makes me sad, like. No, it really does.
Paige
No, he has a good voice because he was.
Justin
No, like, I don't know what. Like, it's almost like being a bad person, like, makes you worse at things because it was when he started getting so horrible that he started getting so bad.
Paige
That's crazy. God was like, let me take those vocal cords away real quick.
Tana
No, seriously.
Justin
And I don't know. I, like, I really. I. It's. Yeah. I don't want to regret Getting too mean about it, because it's like, the Internet has done its job. And thank you guys, obviously, all for supporting me, because it, like, really, it felt good.
Paige
I love seeing you receive the support that you have had internally all along. Like, obviously, everyone close to you has always felt this way.
Tana
Yeah.
Justin
But it's one thing for people around you to validate you, because, of course, like, they're telling you you want what you want to hear. But, like, a lot of. I was made to feel crazy in so many situations that, like, it was validating because he posted texts, and those were real texts for me. I was apologizing like a.
Tana
But every single person who commented on those videos was saying, like, oh, my gosh, I can see exactly where Brooke was coming from, because I've been in situations like that with an ex or whoever who was gaslighting the. Out of me, and they respond the exact same way. Like, those texts, if anything, were just proof of, like, the situation that you were putting.
Justin
Yeah, that's the thing. I would. I was constantly having to apologize, and that's what was so infuriating about it, because I don't like to admit when I'm wrong. And I also don't like to. I hate to say sorry if I'm not sorry. And that's all I was doing. He could have been telling me, but.
Paige
That was in itself is just an attest to the abuse. And I. Honestly, dude, I've been saying this all week, like, my new bit, and no one can stop me from this. Clinton Kane is dead.
Justin
I know, but I don't like that.
Paige
I don't mean, like, literally, but I'm.
Tana
Just saying, like, from our lives, just. He's gone. Erase.
Justin
I know. And I'm. I'm healed, and I feel good, and I feel amazing. And I'm like, I. Again, like, I just almost kind of. Not that I want it to be over because I caused this, and I know that I did.
Paige
I think it will be, but it.
Justin
Just is, like, it's a lot, and it's.
Paige
I think the series was the nail in the coffin. He came to the forefront and showed everyone who he is, and eventually it will, like, move on, you know? Yeah.
Justin
How do you hope he can tell.
Paige
All these girls on TikTok talking about how, like, JoJo Siwa just released her new song at, like, like, not the most opportune time because everyone cares about the Clinton stuff so much, so she keeps making her choreography crazier. Like, let's let JoJo have a moment.
Justin
I don't even know she really Clinton. Only. Only JoJo could save you. And honestly, it's not even working. Donald Trump got shot and, like.
Paige
And your had more. Do you know her had more engagement than Donald Trump's?
Justin
I don't know.
Tana
Oh, no, I believe. I fully believe that.
Paige
I saw some analytics, but then where am I to.
Justin
Yeah, I'm gonna go on record and say that those are faulty analytics as what were most of Clinton's points. And I don't know.
Paige
That is crazy.
Tana
Yeah.
Justin
I got so drunk yesterday, it was like, not even. Okay. Like, I was. I was doing things I'm so ashamed of and.
Paige
Weren't you just leszing out?
Justin
I was leszing out. Well, that's not. I'm not ashamed of that, but I. I was like, there's, like, evidence of me at a restaurant I wasn't even. I know. I don't even know I went to.
Paige
Oh.
Justin
And I'm, like, seeing tick tocks of, like, people I didn't even know I met. Like, I'm like. I'm, like, kiking with them.
Paige
But at least when you're hammered, Brooke.
Tana
Like, you don't you hold yourself together.
Paige
Yeah. Like, you are.
Justin
I know you. You always say that as a positive, but it's not a positive. It's a curse. Because then everybody thinks I was dead serious with all that shit I was saying, and I didn't mean.
Paige
Oh, okay.
Tana
I do the same thing, though. I go from black the fuck out. I'm, like, trying to, like, keep composed, like, keep it together, and then it's just lights out.
Paige
But you go silent. You get a case of the giggles that I've never seen you.
Justin
No, but I also go silent.
Tana
I go nonverbal. I can't talk. I just go, me too.
Paige
Imagine you're playing a game of telephone with yourself and everyone you've ever texted and FaceTime never.
Justin
Yeah, that's tough.
Tana
Yeah.
Justin
I do choose. I do choose.
Paige
Yeah.
Tana
I choose peace. And I know better at this point because I've ruined my life countless times.
Paige
How was the lesing, though? Are you ready to just.
Justin
Like I said on the last episode, I'm spending so much time with all these lesbians that I'm like, wait, I feel at home here.
Tana
Yeah, you got the short nails going.
Justin
You know what I mean? But I am. Well, I've had the short nails going, but I'm scared of. You know how, like, the swifties didn't welcome me, like, because it was like, you either, like, join or don't. Like, I don't Want to get accused of, like, queerbaiting or anything. So until I'm, like, literally scissored up, I'm just gonna go ahead.
Paige
I got wildly accused of that for like, a very long time. And then I had to really, like, munchbox for people to care. And it honestly infuriated I don't, because it's like, I was curious. I didn't know what I was doing.
Justin
Yeah, okay. But here's like, here's what I think.
Paige
It's like, the entire time I was dating Bella, every Daily Mail article was like, tana and friend. Bella and friend. Like, they never once.
Tana
History will say they're best friends. Yeah, yeah.
Paige
Weren't fighting cats and dogs, knocking knees and boots and shit.
Justin
Yeah, that's the thing. But it's like, you know, if. I don't know if I like horseback riding, I like, but I haven't tried it. Well, but it's not a hobby. It's not a hobby.
Paige
So if I don't.
Justin
Okay, wait, so wrong.
Paige
Wrong answer.
Justin
See, I'm learning with you guys.
Paige
If I.
Justin
If I follow along, I appear Irish. Okay. But I don't know that I'm Irish. I've never checked.
Paige
Okay.
Justin
I've got freckles and I've got almost red hair. So sometimes I'm thinking I'm like, I'm probably Irish, but I've never done 23andMe. So until I get those results back, I won't know for sure.
Paige
I almost intelligent analogy ever. Like, that was just so impressive. I know. I'm good. No, that was such an intelligent.
Justin
I don't know if it's inherently in me because I've never put, like, I've really never put it to the test. Like, like, seriously, like, I've hooked up with girls, but, like, drunk and like, you know, I've never, like, really tried to date a girl.
Tana
I also think it's very, like, it's a case by case for me. It's like, person.
Justin
It's.
Tana
I don't know, like a person by person case. So. No, no, like, actually, like, having sex or, like, when it comes to, like, dating girls, for me, it's very. And like, just anyone I date in general. Like, I just have to like them as a person. Be, like, really attracted to them. It doesn't matter, like, what sexuality they are, like, what they identify as. It's just very like, if I like you and like, I think you're attractive and I like your personality, like, then you're for me. But it's like, maybe it Just, it's gonna take finding that for you to go there.
Justin
I think so, too.
Paige
I 100 agree with.
Tana
I also think, like, women are.
Justin
It also could just be, like, literally, I've been driven, like, literally off the rails by the men.
Paige
And it's just like, that's what happened to me. I also think with me, like, for example, when I enter a room, like, I think I'm more straight than I am gay most of the time. And, like, when I enter a room and there's, like, a bunch of hot guys, I see them and I know that they're hot guys because I think I'm inherently attracted more to men.
Justin
But, like, I'm not finding out all attractive. Like, the more you talk to her, like, yes.
Paige
Like, for me, with every girl I dated, it was very, like, case by case, like, wait, I just love you and I'm so attracted to you. I'm not, like, walking into this room, like, trying to fuck y'all. Whereas if you were, like, straight guys, I might be more like.
Justin
That's what your natural, like, disposition is. Yeah. Instinctually, you're natural. Yeah, I understand.
Tana
I also think women are far more intimidating than men. Like, you never know if they're actually, like, gay. If, like, they're into it. And it's like, it's fucking playing sudoku, but figure it out.
Paige
BB on camera just looked me dead in the eyes and goes.
Tana
Me and baby are going to hook up one day.
Paige
And I've always said that too.
Justin
I know. It's. It's like, a lot of tension that goes on in this friend group.
Paige
It really is. We just need to have a big group. Fuck.
Tana
No. But just working out on the react.
Paige
Am concerned for you with is. In my opinion, I have been the most emotionally terrorized.
Justin
Yeah.
Paige
That's by the women I've dated. Like, you want to talk about psychotic fights? You want to talk because it's, like, psychological matching your emotional intelligence and throwing it right back.
Justin
Couldn't be a man.
Tana
A man. When you guys. When you fight with a man, all they can say is, like, you stupid fucking bitch. A woman. Like, a woman will come for you and be like, yeah, that's why your mom abandoned you when you're six years old and your dad never fucking came home.
Paige
I'm like, oh, and think about the fact that, like, think about how, like, have you ever tried to fight with a guy at like, 3am and he's like, I'm too tired. We have. Yeah.
Justin
Like, they don't even want to.
Paige
A woman's Never too tired, babe. You will see the sunrise and the next sunrise.
Tana
And it's like when you think you finally, like, came to a resolution. Like, you guys are done arguing about it and, like, you figured it out. Nope. You'll bring up five more points that weren't addressed the first time. Like, they will find something so minuscule.
Paige
And you can't play any of the games that you play with a man.
Tana
Oh, no.
Paige
You can't play with a woman because she's played. You know what I mean? It's like.
Justin
I do. I agree. And I'm, like, already, like, emotionally a little bit off the rails, so I feel like that's the last thing I get myself involved in.
Tana
Granted, it also is the most loving relationship that you will ever be in. Like, you will never be more seen or heard in your entire life. That's good.
Justin
I do need somebody who's going to match me emotionally because I keep getting involved with these guys who think only with logic and not, like, with a woman's brain. I need somebody to think with an emotional brain.
Tana
Yeah.
Justin
And I'm the most emotional.
Paige
The only times I've ever actually had to go, like, full, full up, no contact, like, restraining order, though, is with women. Like, because it does just. I don't.
Justin
Restraining order is crazy.
Paige
Like, no, it.
Justin
Clinton tells everyone he has a restraining order against me.
Paige
It's so funny that he lives in San Diego.
Tana
Yeah.
Justin
Justin Horowitz just ran into him in San Diego. But you guys look for it. Wait, don't look grim.
Tana
Don't look grim.
Paige
I was just in San Diego all weekend, and you should have seen me like this. Like, oh.
Justin
Like, I was like, he had to run. Well, wait, I shouldn't say that, but, like, he couldn't stay here. What was he going to do? Go back to Bruno, find another girlfriend?
Paige
Like, yeah, San Diego's not safe.
Tana
Yeah, go to Bruno country.
Paige
Yeah, I know.
Justin
That's what he's done every single time. That's how he's ended up so many places.
Paige
This is the problem with girlhood, is that we will always circle back to some shit. Like, girls are never, like. You know what I mean?
Justin
Like, no, I've been like, leave him alone. And I just can't.
Paige
And then six seconds later, something like, bring.
Justin
So sorry.
Paige
What?
Tana
I was going to, like, kind of segue with, like, lesbian relationships, too. Like, when I broke up with my ex, she was like, can we be friends? And I was like, I do not have the emotional capacity to, like, remain.
Justin
Friends with you almost every relationship ever.
Tana
Yeah, I was like, I cannot just view you as a friend without there, like, being any, like, romantic attachment there.
Paige
My last ex girlfriend is saved in my phone, like, dead ass. And, like, to help me as crazy ass. Don't answer. And, like, blocked on everything. Like, it'll never work, dude.
Tana
It's. It's hard now.
Justin
I think I. Again, I know I say this so often on the cancel podcast, but I think I really need to just keep dating off the table until they get my ducks in a row. And, like, obviously I'm not. I'm doing something so terribly wrong, and I keep getting really bad situations.
Alex
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Tana
Speaking of exes, though, talking about being friends. Wait, boy, do I have some tea for you. Timmy Page, do I have some tea for you guys.
Paige
I don't want to make anything about me, but it is so hard to keep track of how many men I want dead. Like, I'm not even kidding. Like, all the women I love in my life lately, it's like, oh, my God, like, another one that I now want dead.
Tana
He's public enemy number one. Okay, so, well, do you want to.
Paige
Give some more on him in general?
Justin
So I was going to educate the canceled listeners.
Tana
Let me give, like, a little backstory. I'll make it pretty quick. I'll make it snappy.
Justin
You have to name him.
Tana
That's what we do here. I'll call him Greg. Okay, backstory on Greg. So I met him on Hinge. This happened, like, November last year, right? Hinge already. First fucking red flag. This man had just came out of a four year long relationship.
Justin
Never that.
Paige
Oh, I know.
Tana
Oh, I learned my lesson. But he claimed he was over it. She was a toxic ex. This and that. They also went to couples therapy.
Justin
That's how you know.
Tana
Which I also said there was one day we were, like, talking about our exes. He was getting into it, and I go, go get your wife. And he goes, yeah, I should call her. He did. Anyway, we spend New Year's together. We're having, like, a great time. We're like three months in. All of his friends are saying to me, they're like, greg likes you so much. Like, just admit that you guys are in love with each other. It's so obvious. But none of. Neither of you will just say it. Da, da, da. Whatever. So I'm like on cloud nine. I'm like, I have this man wrapped around my finger. Like he loves me. He doesn't. So fast forward. We're getting deep into it and now I'm getting to the point where I'm like, okay, to make. Make it or break it. Like, what are we doing here? I don't want to waste my time.
Justin
You're at the. You're at the cap, the time cap for like to be in a situationship.
Tana
The free trial subscription has ended.
Justin
Now you expire. What's like three months, right?
Tana
Yeah. So I did my three month mark.
Paige
Even four or five. Like, but after that it's like everyone should die.
Justin
They know that they want to date you or not.
Paige
You're so right. Why am I bringing excuses from it?
Justin
I went 11 months. I went 11 rounds.
Tana
Yeah, cookie. So I was month three and I was like, all right, what the fuck are we doing? There's one night, we get drunk, we start talking about it and he actually brings it up. He's like, what do you think about us? And I'm like, wait, this is good. I'm like, I think this is going really well. Like, I like what we're doing and whatever. Like, I like, want to keep seeing it, like, forward. And I was like, what about you? And he's like, yeah, I like you. Like, this is perfect. Da da da. And he goes, so, like, do you want a boyfriend? I'm like, kicking my feet. I'm like, yeah. Like, I think like, eventually it would get there. And I was like, what about you? And he goes, well, I'm just really not in a place for that right now. Like, you know, I'm going through a lot. I'm like, working on myself.
Justin
They always want to play working on themselves.
Paige
They always want to play house until the house. Like, you really want the house to be a home, right?
Tana
Like, it's like, catch this actual psychological fucking warfare, right? We have this whole deep talk in his car and he's like, let's just go inside. Oh, he makes a joke in the car and he's like, we're talking about like, our sex, whatever. And he's like, you're the best sex I've ever had. I was like, likewise. It's honestly fucking insane.
Justin
Call me. And we're sick.
Tana
I'm sick.
Paige
No, but dicmatization is a real form, babe.
Justin
And I say we don't get scientific.
Tana
On the canceled podcast I was in dick sand, right? Sinking in dick sand.
Paige
Edgar Allan Ho. Don't.
Justin
You guys are too intelligent for me.
Paige
I was in dick sand. I want a shirt, I want a tapestry.
Justin
I want a video merge Page gets a good, good check.
Tana
Thank you. I was in dick sand with this man and he makes a joke and he's like, should we just, like, say I love you during sex? I'm like, haha, yeah, like, that would be so funny. It wasn't. We end up going into his room. He puts on Fade into youo by Mazzy Starr, which is my favorite song of all time.
Paige
If you don't want to get married.
Tana
Play the weekend, you sick fuck plays Fade into you by Mazzy Starr. We are having the most soul intertwining. I don't even know how else to describe it. Soul intertwining. Eye contact. I love you. Sex. Transcribing, babe. I did so. Oh, my God. Literally transcending time and space. We are linking like the avatars do, right? Twice.
Justin
Making another avatar sexual reference. Like, she wasn't even here for that.
Tana
I watched it. Oh, I'm like, I make the edits around here.
Justin
I know.
Tana
We're making the halo. We are. And he goes. He looks at me and he goes, say it. And I go, you first. He goes, I love you. I said, I love you too. And we have the most insane sex ever. I don't hear for this. I don't hear from this man for a week. After a full seven days, I do not hear from this man.
Paige
And it's genuinely like. Just like, what are you doing? Are you solving a really hard Rubik's Cube, bro? Like. Like, no, I have.
Justin
He's genuinely stuck in quicksand.
Tana
I hope this man got hit by a fucking semi.
Paige
Right?
Tana
So I finally reach out because I'm like, what the fuck is this? And I sent him like, this whole text just essentially saying, like, I'm going to poker hand.
Paige
It's a good sentence.
Tana
Oh, thank you. I said, I'm honestly a little upset that I haven't heard from you, especially after bringing up in the conversation that we had, because I talked about his lack of communication too, which was just shit.
Justin
Yeah, of course.
Tana
I said, I've been thinking about it and I want to see myself out before we keep getting deeper into this. I would want you or whoever I'm with to be excited and have no doubt in their mind we had a really amazing time together and none of it was a waste. Me, I really like you, but it's best to fold when your hand's not strong. I hope you understand that is strong. He responded. He said, not reading that essay.
Justin
No.
Paige
And it sucks because we're both giving Alyssa Violet.
Justin
Not listening to that voice literally, because.
Tana
Like, that made me fold. I was like, no, it's so funny.
Paige
I. I 100. I'm the same way. I would fold every time because it's funny.
Justin
And it's like, it's not funny.
Tana
But no. But then he followed it up.
Paige
Oh.
Tana
And he said, I appreciate and respect your message. I don't want to push the issue. If you made up your mind. For what it's worth, I didn't intend to, like, see you this week. Have a call to discuss how we last left things. He said, poker metaphor in the breakup text is crazy. I said, take it to a publisher for real. But I said, if your mind is still in the same place, then us talking about it more would just be beating a dead horse. I was never good at gambling.
Justin
I love the.
Paige
I keep getting chills. You're such a leader. I would. Where were you?
Justin
I know.
Tana
You should have phoned a friend. I'm always here.
Justin
He. Well, we'll see. We'll see later.
Tana
Because I got bars.
Paige
So really do.
Tana
He ends up reaching out. I haven't talked to him. So we didn't talk after this. Right? It was like, yeah. No radio, no contact. Radio silence. He reached out on June 9, 2:30 in the morning.
Paige
He said, I love women.
Tana
Ate you about tonight. Then he edited it. Are you about tonight? Didn't respond for 10 minutes.
Justin
He goes, are you out tonight?
Tana
Undo. Sorry. So he knew he up. He was drunk as he sent me like the drunk 2am text. Knows he fucked up. Took it back.
Justin
But I didn't eating. I would love to get that.
Tana
Oh, I did. I was like. I was rubbing hands like Birdman.
Paige
But we were giggling. That was the best reference ever. We were giggling, kicking feet. But you're so strong. Like, the way she handles all of this and the like, lack of contact and whatever. Like, you're really my.
Justin
Yeah. For you to be able to be the first to be like, you know what? This isn't for me. Sorry. Gotta see myself.
Paige
I would have had a smokey wing on in 20 and I would have been about tonight.
Tana
Listen, I'm always like, I will not be made a fool. Me a fool.
Justin
I'm being made a fool.
Tana
So, yeah. Tori always said she's like, you're literally made of steel for not responding to that. I said, thank you. He texted me Today at one in the afternoon. So he's been thinking about it. This wasn't like a late night text. He goes, I'd like to be friends with you if that sounds cool and not weird to you, or if there's an avenue there at some time down the road, let me know. I hope you're well, etc. I send him a screenshot of a cerebral email that I got for my sixth month celebrating my mental health journey.
Justin
That is really, like, honestly, that's really powerful. God, you're so genius. You're so smart.
Tana
Thank you. Thank you. So I sent him the screenshot and then he just talked about, I'm more stable and well adjusted now. Da, da, da, whatever.
Paige
And he goes, of course you are.
Tana
He goes, think about it. Let me know if you think we can have a platonic relationship, because I do enjoy who you are. I think that could be. Fuck you. First of all, I hate when an ex is like, can we be friend? No, I have enough friends. I have plenty of friends. Actually, I don't.
Paige
What are we going to do?
Justin
Good friends, like, nobody wants to be friends with.
Paige
All we've ever done is knock genitals. What the fuck? Are we going to go to a pottery class?
Justin
See you guys. Do you. I feel like sometimes you guys get together beforehand.
Paige
Oh, no, we just spend. Yeah, we've never gotten apart.
Tana
We don't separate.
Justin
But I was going to a pottery class and still.
Paige
Bitch.
Tana
I'm literally just. I'm. So if you don't want to date me, leave me the fuck alone. I heavy on it. You could have just left me alone. You could have just fucking left me alone.
Justin
And I'm begging.
Tana
QLB. Quite literally begging.
Paige
I also want to for 10 seconds. I have personal beef with him now, right?
Tana
Oh, my God.
Paige
What do you do? So mind you, Paige was. Paige is very good as well. About like, kind of like when she's newly talking to someone protecting almost like her friend group. Like, she's not. Dude, I make out with someone once and I'm bringing them around to everyone, like signing the wedding papers. Like, I'm unfortunately just like that. Like, you will like, make sure, like, I'm not going to bring you trial run until, like, you're my fucking boyfriend. Because you don't deserve that and like all these new friends and, you know, whatever. And we've talked about that at length. Like, I think it's such a good thing that you do. Right? So I only had the privilege of.
Tana
Privilege is crazy.
Paige
Of meeting this diva. Wrong word, Greg. This diva. Greg diva, like, two, three times. Right. And obviously, like, I'm ready to meet him and get to know him as much as she is comfortable with.
Justin
Duh.
Paige
But the only time we'd really ever even had some camaraderie was at a Lakers game. Like, we all went to this Lakers game, and we were all in the suite, and he was hammered. I was sober at the time, too, so it was kind of like one of those where I was like, whatever. We just didn't really get to, like, link up. And I was going through a lot of drama at that Lakers game. That was when.
Tana
Yeah.
Paige
Lila Gate began.
Justin
Yes.
Paige
So I just wasn't. We didn't even talk, like, that much at all. Whatever. Right. And I'm assuming that you were never going to. Him talking shit about me, obviously. Duck. No, duh. So it's like, his only interaction with me was, like, nice and kind, like, whatever. And Trevi, a couple weeks ago, goes out to the club with this guy that she met on Hinge, right? Come to find out he's best friends or neighbors with Greg. So Greg comes, and then Trevi is meeting fans at the club, and Greg is, like, there and hammered and, like, whatever. And a fan comes up to Trevi, and it's like, I love you and Tana. Like, you and Tana in this video. Whatever. Greg has the nerve to open his little yap and say, like, oh, Tana. I know Tana. I don't like Tana. I don't even fucking know you.
Justin
Like, fuck Greg.
Tana
Literally bold of you to fucking say. You actual weird motherfucker.
Paige
Like, and was just try, like, speaking to, like, sounding exhausted of, like, our.
Tana
Lore and acting like he knows her and, like, he's been around her, and he's like, oh, yeah, like, Tana, you don't know her. You actual weirdo.
Paige
And so you want to be friends.
Justin
You want to kick it in the friend, right?
Tana
Sort of like, now you want to be besties. No, I'm actually gonna come on here and slander your name.
Paige
Yeah.
Justin
And you should say his real name, I think.
Tana
No, just kidding. Well.
Justin
Well, no, we don't do that anymore. Someone. Someone made a thing today that said Brooks, like, Zeus. And, like, everyone just is, like, getting struck by lightning.
Tana
I love playing God. And you know what? I love playing Amelie. And here's the thing. Like, how actually crazy is it because Trevi texted us. It was, like, 2 in the morning or not, like, 12. And she goes, SOS 911. I'm out with your Greg. And she Was like the man I went on a date with just so happens to be friends with him. And he brought it up. He was like, do you know Paige Cameron? And she was like, yeah. And then she goes, oh, oh, oh. And he goes like that.
Paige
Why are you fishing?
Tana
She goes, oh, why are you like.
Paige
Oh, do you guys know Peach Kimberly? Like ob Is that your only claim to anything in Los Angeles? Like yawning.
Tana
Barf, barf, barf, barf, barf, barf. So anyway, she barked quietly for you. Thank you. All I have to say do is.
Justin
Yeah, no, that's so fucking frustrating. It's like, like you say, leave me alone. Like, don't come back into my life. Come, like walk back. Because it's like I was doing just fine. You sent him your fucking six month thing. You've been on this whole healing journey. You haven't thought about him in X amount of fucking months. And now he wants to what, be playing tender switch?
Paige
That's just what I don't exactly. What I don't get is it's like.
Tana
A cheap way for him to kind of like try to open the door again to us hooking up.
Justin
Duh. Like, hello, Duh, right? And it works every time.
Tana
I almost folded and I was like, hold on, hold on. Let me put my diva hat on.
Justin
See, you're so much better than me. I'm like trying. Oh my God.
Tana
Yeah. At some point I'm just like, I can't be made a fool. I have to stand the up.
Justin
No. And that's amazing. And such a admirable quality because what the endless.
Tana
But it pains me, I don't want to do.
Justin
I know.
Paige
We could go to Silver Lake tonight with blindfolds on, arms out like this. And the first person we grabbed by the collar would probably be just like Greg. And that's what he needs to remember. Like, yeah.
Justin
You are not special. You are literally just.
Tana
You are just another raggedy man.
Paige
Same with him, like, it's like especially we could go fishing with our eyes closed and probably grab someone with the line and find, you know, it's just.
Tana
We are.
Justin
It's him and his other girlfriend, right?
Tana
They are just 10.
Justin
One of them.
Tana
Yeah, well, that's the thing too.
Justin
Yeah. So.
Tana
So that was fun today.
Paige
Sending back the cerebral screenshot is just.
Justin
Going, you know, you know what is so valuable about that is like you're gonna feel good about that forever. You know what I mean? Like when you do fold, it's just like a disgusting feeling that you have to carry with you forever.
Paige
That was such a good take. Yeah, like, we don't vocalize that enough. Like, just in general, it's like girls watching, like you will always feel like shit folding. And when you're in the position to not fold, like, do your best not to.
Justin
Well, yeah, I say that because I've been in the position. I've literally ended things with the same person that I'm like, going through this with. Like, with right now. I've done it myself and I felt amazing. I felt like a fucking million bucks. And now that it's not on my own terms, I want to die. And I'm like, why couldn't I have just fudgeing stood on business and.
Paige
But it is what I meant. They never to be in the vulnerable position and like, think you can just chat a little. But like, in reality, you're all part of this big plot to get like, you know.
Justin
Yeah.
Tana
And like, they're just. They never change. So lesson learned. Door is closed. Sayonara. Nice knowing you.
Justin
See you, Greg.
Tana
Bye, Greg.
Justin
Don't let the door hitcha.
Paige
It's so funny that your manager's name is Greg.
Justin
Sorry, Greg.
Tana
Oh, sorry, Greg.
Justin
Just catching strays.
Tana
I'm gonna be at his house tonight.
Paige
Don't.
Justin
Careful drinking.
Tana
I know.
Justin
That's where I get myself in trouble. I just need somebody new. I'm like upset. I got like blue balled by this athlete who I've been obsessed with forever. And then like, I talked about him like, you know, here and there on canceled, like from years. We've known him for like four years now and.
Paige
Oh, that one.
Justin
Yeah, he came back in recently and we've been like, we were like, really chatting it up, like, really hitting it off. And I was like, fuck this loser who, like, you know what I mean? Like, I was like, I've got this guy. And then he just disappeared on me. I'm like, God, I will never win.
Paige
You know, last week the boys lie girl said to me, like, athletes, artists and assholes. And it just like, it's so true. Like, give anyone creative or athletic freedom and suddenly, no, it's. They don't have a empathetic bone in their body.
Justin
It's almost like, like it has to be correlated with like success though. Like a certain level of success. It's like it gives someone like an ego that is irreparable.
Tana
My man didn't even have any level of success, actually. He was at the first rung in the ladder of success. And he thought he could do all that.
Paige
Yeah, actually. Yeah. What is It.
Justin
That's bold. But then it's like. It's same thing with, like, ugly guys.
Paige
I really also just think it's la. Like, I'm so. It's funny. I just set one of my close friends up with one of Makoa's friends and she was kind of being like, wow, like, this guy's such a great guy. Like, where do you find these? And I'm like, literally, Maui. Like, unfortunately. Like, it's like, I'm so outsourcing. I'm so on outsourcing. Like, it's like. Because even, like, your guy, you're saying was on the number one rung of this ladder, but we've always said it. It takes a certain level of delusion to move to la. And. And why is it perfectly fine when women do it? I don't know. I can't. I can't get the nail on the head there. But I'm just saying with these men.
Justin
Like, there's not enough research.
Paige
They move here because they, you know.
Justin
They think they're, like, so. Yeah.
Tana
Shitty. Whatever.
Justin
What they have is so valuable. Like, they have what they have to offer the world is, like, enough to get them out here. And then they have. Yeah. No, no, no, no.
Tana
And it's just so funny.
Paige
I think it's different because women don't use. Like, women will move to LA with that delusion, but they're not using it to, like, hold power or manipulation or a narcissistic hierarchy over a man. Like, it's. I think that's why I say it like that.
Tana
Yeah.
Paige
I don't know. But then there's guys like, Aaron, dude, I really. Aaron. I feel like Aaron is always in the room when we're like, literally today we're, like, all having a conversation, maybe all of us, where we're like, I fudgeing hate men. And Aaron's like, hey, like, there are the rule. They're just so few.
Justin
I know, but I would, like, I have to take some sort, like, some level of accountability for choosing guys that I know are wrong.
Tana
Oh, yeah.
Justin
You know what I mean? It's like there's. There's a million good guys, like, actual, like, errands everywhere that we are, like, literally just walking right past to get straight to the guy who's seven feet tall.
Paige
Yeah. I also. I do think they're fewer and far between in la.
Justin
It's. It's not. I'm talking about athletes. I could have said the guy who. See, I sing it in the corner. That wasn't supposed to the guy with.
Tana
The mustache, mullet, patchwork tattoos.
Justin
I'm just saying, like, it's. It's like something that I gravitate toward every time as a guy who I know is gonna suck. And it's just, like, something. It's literally, like, magnetic.
Tana
The guy who's gonna ash his cigarette out in my eyeballs is what I'm going for every single time.
Paige
You ate so hard with that, and I'm starving. No. Even just the hinge of it all is scary because you're picking someone solely based on their looks and where they live and their. You know, I don't.
Justin
You got to be careful with the dating apps, too, because it's like, you have to assume that if they're meeting you there, they're meeting lots and lots of people there all the time.
Paige
No. You know, I had a hinge man with fucking patchwork and a mustache fuck up my year. And then I was like. And then I was like, wait, I literally don't know you.
Tana
That's crazy.
Paige
That is. The good healing thing about meeting people on dating apps is that you can, at some point, remove yourself from the situation. Like, I don't fucking know you at all from Adam or Eve. Adam or Eve. I always say that wrong, and she.
Justin
Always says Adam or Eve.
Tana
What do you say? Wait, that's just.
Justin
I don't know you from Adam.
Tana
Oh.
Justin
Or if she doesn't know you from Adam.
Paige
I'm just always trying to, I think, but.
Justin
But also, I want to go on record and say there's a lot of times that everyone knows this, that I've corrected Tana and been wrong, and I want to take accountability because sometimes I.
Paige
Just be saying, while we have this right now, like, literally, just serious.
Justin
But, like, I. You know, sometimes I just, like, really, like, I have an issue I always have, like, with being, like, a know it all. I was, like, the person to, like, you know, that I was just gonna say I was, like, the person to, like, correct my teacher and stuff, but it's because my grandpa, like, I grew up with my grandpa. He was like. He was an English teacher, and he wanted to correct me all the time. I felt like that was, like, the nature of my household, and I was such a, like, little, like, fucking.
Paige
I also have an issue with thinking I'm right about everything I say, so if anything, I think it's a good balance.
Justin
Yeah, well, I think I'm right always, too, but I'm really almost always wrong.
Paige
But I'm speaking with a lot of delusion, a Lot of the time. And I do think you hold me accountable. So I don't want anything to change.
Alex
Water damage is no joke. Did you know that water damage makes up more than 25% of all home insurance claims? And the average claim costs over $13,000. Don't let a small leak turn into a big expense. Learn more at go.pemco.com Nojoke Pemco Mutual Insurance Co. Seattle, WA Wait, I was.
Justin
Gonna ask you guys. Do you guys think anything about my picnic or pick me like tech tendencies has anything to do with growing up in a household of men, like wanting the approval of.
Paige
Yes.
Justin
I always. I.
Paige
Because I first chime in ever. He goes.
Justin
Because I'm. I'm. I've been like really trying to unpack it. Thank you, Aaron. That was, that was. He's getting me back for a second ago.
Tana
Yeah.
Justin
Obviously. Like I had my grandpa and my uncle who I grew up with. Like, only really because my grandma, like once I like was like really formative years. Like she was gone. So like everything was just like. Like I need the approval of like them.
Paige
Oh, if you want to go so crazy on that.
Justin
Like, I have like the strongest like, like male figures in my life ever. Yeah.
Tana
I think it's. But it just comes down to like trying to like measure up to the men in your life.
Justin
No, I also think it's like my natural instinct is like to impress a man or to like to like. I want to say things like, I want to say things that I know that like they're going to relate to and stuff like that. Because that's like kind of like I.
Paige
Wonder about such a massive pick me until like 18 or like I just got humbled crazy like by the Internet. And I think that saved me from that.
Justin
But I was. Well, that's what's happening to me.
Paige
I was such a fucking pick me. Like, cuz I always wanted my dad to love me.
Justin
Yeah.
Paige
You know what I mean? Like, and that translated into all of the first people I ever dated. You know what I mean? And what's my interaction?
Justin
Yeah, it's like those, those are the opinions that I've always valued the most is like my uncle and my grandpa. Because those are the people who were in my house. So now I'm like like, yeah, that's men.
Tana
Yeah. I think that's just like growing, like growing up too and realizing you don't need the male Val validation. I think everyone goes through that phase. I did that too in high school. Are you kidding me?
Justin
Yeah. But I Was like, it's so. It's so hard to unlearn it because it's like really, it's not. It's so subconscious. Like I have no idea that I'm doing it. And I'll watch something back and I agree with everyone, but I'm like, wait.
Paige
Like I completely, completely resonate with you on that. Like, I think it's something that I still am unlearning and still have to figure out and like, you know what I mean? I don't know.
Justin
Yeah, same thing with like just misogyny in general. I feel like I'm naturally. And that combined with like everyone in my household being like way older.
Paige
Same was.
Justin
Yeah, yeah, you too. That it's almost like I'm like very old fashioned and like it just like, I think I just had a perfect storm of like all kinds of things to give me a really bad personality. And I'm apologizing.
Tana
No, I have a bad personality.
Paige
You have the best personality in the world.
Justin
I wasn't really working on it, but.
Tana
You have the best personality.
Justin
No, no, no, no. Not. See, now it looks like I'm fishing. I gotta.
Paige
No, no, I don't think you're a fish.
Tana
I'm thinking this way too hard. Also, you're a girls girl. Like so if you. I'm like, if you want to be a little, pick me here and there. It doesn't fucking matter because at the end of the day you're a girls girl and you will ride for your girls.
Justin
I do love girls so much and I've always had the best and strongest like female friendships. And I like, I care about that more than I care about anything else. So that's why I get like sometimes frustrated with. I also pick the allegations because I'm like, I really would, I would choose a woman every time.
Tana
Yeah.
Paige
I also think so many people, unfortunately, and some by choice and some not by choice will never be blessed with the awareness pack. Right. We'll never be blessed with the awareness Clinton, Cain and. And yes. But even just, but just everyone, like so many people just will never have that like social. Like the fact that right now you can say I was raised this way and it made me this way and I want to change that pattern some people will never get. Yesterday I was with a Nepo. Nepo baby ass bitch. And I was just watching her like dig a grave conversationally and I was like, you'll never get that. Yeah, like, you know, the amount of.
Tana
People who don't actually spend the time to self reflect and Think about shit like that.
Justin
Well, it helps that we have, like, really no choice because, like, if we're. We're not gonna do it, someone else is gonna do it for you. So it's kind of like, honestly, it's helpful sometimes. Like, the. Not criticism. Criticism isn't, like, helpful. But I like when people point things out that you didn't necessarily know about yourself.
Paige
Okay, but look at Alyssa Violet. And I don't mean to like.
Tana
No, let's.
Paige
Whatever.
Justin
Did we not take it there hard enough last time?
Paige
I'm just saying, point blank, being she had a week of the Internet, of thousands of people saying, hey, this is probably a really wrong take, and her entire take from that was, the Internet's just a toxic place. Mind you, the diss tracks.
Tana
You're going for years.
Paige
Yeah, like. Like, she could have. You know what I mean?
Tana
Like, you didn't have to post that.
Paige
Reeled back.
Justin
Yeah.
Paige
Clinton.
Justin
Katie could have read the comments on my videos and made. Maybe he would have changed up his 29.
Paige
I'm saying. I'm saying, like, the self awareness, like, awareness pack is given to everyone. Some people just choose not to see.
Justin
Like, they just.
Paige
They get the. The walking stick and they start. You know what I mean? Like, it doesn't. It doesn't always hit. And you're lucky to have those cogs turning properly.
Justin
Yeah, I'm trying.
Tana
You. You're.
Paige
I think you're succeeding. Trump got shot.
Justin
Trump did get shot. We kind of breezed over that earlier. Or was skimmed over that earlier.
Tana
I love the little tap. You are such a dad. You go like, that's exactly what Cameron loves.
Justin
I'm a knee slapper like her. Crazy. Crazy. And I keep. I, for some reason, I like, adopted it to where I hit exactly the.
Tana
Like, they were the reflex thing on.
Justin
My knee, but sometimes, so you don't notice it on. Canceled all the time.
Tana
I'll, like, do the.
Paige
You're a bear.
Tana
Just. It has mustard stains. Like, that is Tana's bear.
Justin
Yeah.
Paige
It's so funny that we both have the same slippers, you and I, Paige. And mine are clearly covered in various sauces, and yours aren't. But I like to eat down to my feet.
Justin
We did. So we skimmed over. Wait, one of these. Wait, both of ours have a mustard stain.
Tana
Does mine have a mustard stain?
Justin
Oh, wait, no. It's just a fuzzy.
Tana
Oh, you pass it to me. All right, I'll take the mustard home.
Justin
We skimmed over Donald Trump getting shot, but that's actually so insane. And I want to know what you guys think it's going to do to the election?
Paige
I saw this guy doing standup comedy and the video had like 10 million views and like a million likes. So it wasn't just something I skimmed across. This is something that was like massively well received. Right?
Justin
Yeah.
Paige
Of him saying, like, I wasn't really fucking with Trump until I knew that he had ops. Joe Biden's biggest op is the stairs. And like, I was like, damn, this shit is actually like, like sway. First of all, hilarious. Second of all, like, listen, this is swaying the election, in my opinion.
Justin
Well, yeah, an attempted assassination will do that for sure.
Tana
That's the picture of him, like bleeding from his ear, holding his fist up with the flag in the back. It's crazy hilarious.
Justin
Second, hilarious.
Paige
Did you on the watch list by now? I just kept seeing memes of Trump's ear bleeding and people saying, don't get your ears pierced at Claire's.
Tana
No, I was gonna say I keep seeing edits.
Justin
I can barely lift my head back up.
Tana
I'm like, I keep seeing.
Paige
This is where America's at.
Tana
No, I keep seeing edits of him, like, as the Norman Rockwell album cover.
Paige
Wait, Was just seen in a MAGA hat.
Justin
You know, definitely Carlson's boyfriend, right?
Tana
Who? Norman Rockwell. The guy on the COVID Jesse Lee or Jesse Ruff.
Justin
No, no, no, no. Look, are we. Is that what you're looking at?
Paige
We're looking at a photo of the Grand Canyon.
Justin
Well, Lana, of course. Lana's a Trump supporter.
Paige
Wait, what do you mean?
Justin
Right? It would feel. That feels right to me.
Paige
Okay, you're probably right.
Tana
That makes sense. I mean, that checks out.
Justin
But that. So first of all, someone made that in pics art.
Tana
She also didn't wear a mask during COVID And she was honestly hilarious. She wore like a mesh bedazzled.
Paige
Oh, so does that mean you're full MAGA now? Like, cuz Lana.
Tana
No, no, no.
Justin
Look at there. She's holding an automatic weapon.
Tana
She's hilarious. God, I love her so much.
Justin
That's.
Paige
Okay. Aaron literally just acts out of the tub.
Justin
She looks amazing.
Tana
She's so hot. I love her.
Justin
Yeah, we're not flying.
Tana
And I also keep seeing.
Paige
No, you first.
Tana
No, I was gonna say you go like this. I'm like, ah. I also keep seeing fan edits of like, Trump and Joe Biden and it's like in another lifetime, we, like, would have played golf together.
Paige
Dude, like a Phoebe Bridger song.
Justin
I saw a meme that was like Joe Biden called Donald Trump to see if he was okay, like, if he wanted to, he would.
Paige
Can I be honest with you? There was a edit the other day of how Trump and Biden would be friends in another life. And it moved me to actual tears, like, streaming down my face.
Justin
It makes me sad for both of them. Like, they're so old, that's all.
Paige
Like, no, I just want to see them, like on a golf course.
Tana
I'm like, alyssa Violet.
Justin
First of all, Donald is on that golf course. He did not miss his fucking 8am tea time the next day.
Paige
That's iconic.
Tana
That's so fucking funny. Also, weren't they like arguing about that?
Justin
But I want to be. I want to just be.
Paige
There's a point in my life where, like, if I got shot at the ear, I would still be in Barney's Beanery that night.
Justin
I wouldn't. And that's the difference between you and I. I would have made such a debacle about that.
Paige
No, I would have called the Hollywood fix, had my ear out like, Kevin Wong.
Justin
Kevin Wong's outside. I have myself bandaged up.
Tana
So crazy, like, in a wheelchair has nothing to do with your legs. You have a cast on your arm.
Justin
Everyone's like, I look like that meme from spongebob.
Paige
No, you couldn't get that dried blood off you.
Tana
Paper skin. Holy. Oh, God.
Justin
I can't help it. What is it? That's another thing I have, like, I don't know where I got is like that the hope to get hurt.
Tana
You actually just made me gulp.
Paige
I went, no, Brooke, genuinely, you couldn't get that dried blood off your ear. Someone had a fucking ever.
Justin
I was the type to like keep the hospital band on for like months.
Paige
Listen, like, what happened? Can I actually say something that I will probably regret? Me every week. Me every single week. I do, however. And listen, we were just talking about this. We are such victims of propaganda.
Justin
I'm like the number one target for propaganda. I fall victim every single time. I believe Clinton gain.
Paige
I think the shooting was staged.
Tana
Okay? I keep seeing tiktoks about this and.
Paige
I obviously, like, before I even get into that, it's very unfortunate that anyone like lost a life or got injured. So it's like hard to talk about it in a light hearted manner when there was something serious that happened. But I 100% think it was staged.
Justin
I don't know how I feel about. I haven't seen any like, tick tocks about that. Honestly, I haven't seen any tick tocks about.
Paige
I just think if he was genuinely in fear of his life. Maybe he would have.
Justin
No, but doing shot will do something. Or getting shot will do that to you. Like, you know, like, the adrenaline.
Tana
Like, I am seeing really weird videos about, like, the crowd not ducking or running, but. Yeah.
Justin
Did you see that girl behind him? I did see that video of that girl behind him who was like.
Paige
But I guess also MAGA stands are kind of like that.
Tana
I don't know.
Justin
Also, I don't. I'm not confident that I would know what was happening in a situation like that. Especially, like, the sound. It doesn't sound like a gunshot.
Paige
Yes, you would. I've been in so many shootings. So many. I was actually just thinking about this shooting. I was at one time. Sorry. Here I go. Flip ant, breadcrumb.
Justin
Wait.
Tana
Yeah.
Paige
I was in high school, and a lot of Vegas parties would get shot up. Like, a lot. Right. Which was just, like, awful. Right. And one of my friends, Jack, he lived. I love you, Jack. He got shot, but I was standing next to him. And you just know. Like, I was thinking about this genuinely. Like, you hear the immediate noise, and, you know.
Justin
No, but I don't think. I don't think I have.
Paige
It's a noise that you don't hear here.
Justin
I've. But I have.
Paige
Oh, but you freeze.
Justin
And I'm. I'm telling you, you and I just have opposite.
Paige
I'm like.
Justin
I was like the girl on stage.
Tana
Yeah.
Justin
You know what I mean? Like, I would have been the girl behind Trump who's like.
Tana
Yeah, just.
Paige
I just realized that. Yeah, it's like flight or freeze. But I was thinking about this. My friend Jack, he got shot at, and I was, like, standing next to him, and I ran and I jumped out a window. And in the backyard of the house that the shooting was at.
Justin
Didn't you steal something?
Paige
This was a different time. There was. There was. They had all these dogs in the backyard, like rottweilers. And. And so I jump, I jump out the window, and then the dogs are chasing me. I got bit by a dog.
Tana
Stop.
Justin
Oh, no.
Paige
Isabella was there. I don't know. It's just, like, a random story, but bit by dog.
Tana
But, like, the scar.
Paige
I got bit by a dog. Like, there was a point where it was like, maybe you could have just hid in the bedroom. I don't know. It doesn't matter. I didn't need to share that. It was just. I'm just saying, like, no.
Justin
Tana lore.
Paige
I think, you know, when you run.
Justin
Well, I have. It's.
Tana
Well.
Justin
Or it's Been a lot of years since I've heard a gunshot, to be honest.
Tana
Was that.
Paige
No.
Tana
What, did he, like, show up somewhere, like, with a gun?
Paige
Yes. That was a bonfire. Oh, my God. Where? But he's, like, one of my best friends, so that's, like, pathetic.
Tana
I want to, like.
Paige
Like, I grew up with him, this guy, but they would show up to bonfires and just shoot in the air and watch everyone run, like, they just enjoyed it.
Tana
I ran that, man.
Paige
I. Yeah, you did.
Justin
So. So did she, right.
Paige
That I was just twins left and right, though. I didn't need to do that. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Justin
I saw someone say that me and you both had sex with Trevor Wallace today. And I just want to go on record and say, no, we didn't.
Paige
No, we didn't.
Justin
But I love him so much.
Paige
And honestly, it was by the hair on our chin that we didn't. You know, like, it wasn't like, oh, I don't want to. Like, it just happened to not happen.
Justin
I wasn't even in that position. I never got to the house.
Paige
We watched Pawn Stars.
Justin
Better than Avatar.
Tana
It's honestly so.
Justin
Poor guy. He's like, leave Trevor alone.
Paige
Yeah, I love him.
Justin
I saw him post the other day. He goes, just finished seven shows in Sacramento. We go, trevor, do a bigger venue. Seven shows.
Paige
Put them all together.
Tana
Holy fuck.
Justin
Like, could you imagine if someone told us we had seven Sacramento shows?
Paige
Yeah. No, I would say. I would literally just tweet, everyone, please congregate on this one date. And then there'd be Tanacon again, right?
Justin
Yes. That really is kind of wild if you think about it.
Alex
Water damage is no joke. Did you know that water damage makes up more than 25% of all home insurance claims? And the average claim costs over $13,000. Don't let a small leak turn into a big expense. Learn more@go.pemco.com no joke. Pemco Mutual Insurance Company, Seattle, Washington.
Paige
Speaking of. Just, like the Tanacon era of it all, something so unfortunate of me is going viral.
Justin
What is it?
Paige
I'm going.
Tana
There's so many things.
Paige
No, I know. I don't. I don't know what's happening right now. Again. I just want two weeks.
Tana
Me neither.
Paige
So I was dating Monson and in secret as well, because my marriage, I think, to Jake Paul was still, like, publicly on. I don't even. I don't know.
Justin
It's hard when that happens.
Paige
I wasn't. I wasn't mentally all there. Right. So I just. The timelines for me are crossed over, right? But obviously I become everyone I date and always have just down to the core. I'll be surfing next week. I don't know, dude. I become everyone I date. So at the time, I was Mod Son, right? And I got this offer to do this holiday show, and it was like I was. Huh?
Justin
Was this when you went on Maury?
Paige
No, not at all.
Justin
But it's so funny.
Paige
No, like, it was a live show. It was at the Gramercy in New York City. Like, I sold tickets.
Justin
I remember Lila went, and I was so upset because, like, we were all, like, I was the only one who didn't get invited.
Paige
You should be happy you didn't.
Tana
I'm seeing all the videos.
Justin
I'm still offended.
Paige
So I'm dating Mon, and I just released my song without you. The whole Internet wants me to talk about this song, and I don't really know what to say.
Tana
Why does everybody you.
Justin
That song is good. I love that song.
Tana
You guys.
Paige
Now maybe a little less auto tune and we could. But I remember.
Justin
I remember you're without you era. Like when you were on Twitter and just like, oh, my God, it was crime. Never seen someone post so much for anything. It was amazing.
Paige
Well, I would retweet every person streaming a song so I could chart above all the artists. Like, that was my. Like.
Justin
Wait, so I think they're trying to get you back up there right now to piss Clinton off.
Paige
I know.
Justin
Not that he was ever.
Tana
And everyone stream.
Paige
It's. It's just wild. Listen, I made that song about Jake with Mod. It was like this whole thing, like, it was a mess, right? But so I get offered to do this holiday show, and I go and I perform without you. Not only do I perform without you, I perform without you With. Exactly. I'll tell you, actually, a little lore more. But I have a half up, half down hairstyle. My trap run, I'm wearing. I'm wearing a black latex jump suit. I look like I should be, like, a construction worker.
Tana
You're, like, in the Karma music video Red lip.
Justin
Like, it's always the red lip that gets you in a little bit of trouble.
Paige
It was a holiday show.
Justin
Right, right, right.
Paige
Christmas. And again, something about Maude that I did really love being with him. And, like, I appreciate this about him to this day. Is he. He just, like, he'll believe in something. Like, he produced a song. He believed in it to the core. He was like, you're gonna be a pop star. You should dress like this. You should do this, you know, like, he'll believe in you so hard that you'll start delusionally. Also, like, it wasn't delusional.
Justin
The song was a bop.
Paige
You saw the outfit, though.
Justin
I saw the outfit. That was a horrible video.
Paige
So at the time, Ashley Swan was also dating Michael Chawartha, and he was, like, giving me vocal lessons. He's on stage in the video. Mind you, the middle had just released with Zed and him. Like, why don't you just meet me in the middle? So I'm like, he's the biggest star in the world right now.
Tana
No, literally, she just out of bed.
Paige
But so he's, like, coaching me. He's on stage in the video. I'm like, I'm the middle. Like, no one could tell me shit. And these videos of me, and it's just so clear. Like, it's just like, that girl's dating Mod Sun. Like, it just. It just checks out.
Justin
Maybe you have a little bit of a personality disorder. Well, what is like, that. Well, mirroring, like, that's what happens when you date someone and you, like, become.
Tana
Personally, I think you gave Lady Gaga VMAs paparazzi a run for her money. I'm gonna kill my. You perform, mama.
Paige
Can I tell you something funny that's coming out of this, though? I have to tell you another story.
Justin
Of course.
Paige
So with the without you performance videos going viral comes my other performance videos going viral, right? And as you know, I have done, like, four whole music tours, which is horrifying.
Justin
I can't believe that.
Tana
I didn't even know that. That's crazy.
Paige
I have.
Justin
You've lived so many lives.
Paige
Hefner went gold. And listen, there was. There was shit to sell. So I was like, you know what I mean? And at the time, I was only managed, and in a world where I was kind of a cash cow and these songs were making a lot of money. And so we're going to tour the songs, and I was like, with it, right? But one of my most viral performances of Hefner is me in this red camo dress performing Hefner. And I'm seeing all these videos, and that's who I was at the time. I was Red Camo. I was Hefner.
Tana
And I still have that dress.
Paige
And. Yeah. And I. And I think the performance, you know, they were funny. And it was like a fun time. Like, I wouldn't change anything. I can't guarantee I'll go back to that era. Sorry to let the people who want that for some Reason down. But I want to tell you a story about this day. Okay? So the red camo dress day. I keep seeing the videos of that, right? I'm on tour. And at the time, I was just a mess to work with, like, as. You know, like, I just. I shouldn't have been touring, right? But I somehow fell into that. And so at the time, I wanted to sleep all day. I wanted to get up. Like, no parental figures, no one telling me anything. So even getting me on that stage was, like, a very hard thing. And as you know, I'm ADHD galore. I need my Adderall to do a lot of shit, but now I take it accordingly. And whatever. At the time, it was getting shoved in my mouth, like, yeah, like. Like, so that I would go on the stage. Right?
Tana
Yeah.
Paige
And we had just done this whole run of tour, music tour. I'm performing Hefner and W and Kobe. Unreleased. I love W. Everything, right? And this was the final show of that run. And I believe it was in San Francisco. I don't fully remember, remember, But I didn't want to get up. I didn't want to do it. I had a flight to Dubai that night from San Francisco.
Justin
Come to Dubai.
Paige
Like, think about that. Like, as soon as you're walking off stage performing Hefner, you're on, like, to Dubai. It all made no sense. And then I had to fly back from Dubai straight into a show on stage in New Jersey. Like, it just was a very strange time.
Tana
Okay?
Paige
And so that morning, my Adderall was supposed to be shoved into my mouth.
Tana
Oh, no.
Paige
And I'm not. This is. The book will unpack all of the lore. But let's just say. Well, no, let's not just say, instead of an Adderall being shoved into my mouth. Not a Xanax.
Justin
Don't say Xanax.
Paige
Worse. Worse.
Justin
Percocet.
Tana
Worse.
Paige
Valium. Valium.
Justin
Oh, my God. It's bringing me to Eminem instead of Adderall.
Paige
Someone gave me Valium.
Tana
I'm like, who?
Paige
No, Book.
Tana
Holy Book.
Paige
Book, book. Whole Valium. In my opinion, all of those drugs you just named would be easier to do anything on. Valium is like, I'm Gumby. I'm a fettuccine noodle.
Justin
I'm starving.
Paige
I have to go do a meet and greet and perform rap on a stage on Valium. What form? Rap was crazy because I'm not a rapper like you.
Justin
You are.
Paige
It doesn't come natural to me. No, it doesn't. And I'm watching All these videos of me go viral from a show day where I was supposed to be on Adderall performing. I'm on Valium. Caught a flight to, like, that's so bad. Caught a flight to Dubai that night, like, successfully.
Justin
Yeah, that's actually a slay.
Paige
Well, you know, so up. You could just move.
Tana
You know, the icarly episode, like, where they, like, accidentally, like, or what happens. Like, the. The actress, like, passes out. They have to, like, hold her up and, like, move her.
Paige
That was.
Tana
That's you.
Paige
That was actually me. Hunter has so many, like, BTS videos of that day. It was so bad. It was so, so bad. And I'm watching all these videos. Like, what do you mean? Someone on your team accidentally gave you Valium instead of Adderall and you still had to do the show in the meet and greet, and now these videos are going viral.
Justin
Pulled it off, though, because, like, I wouldn't have been.
Paige
You can tell I'm giving Lil Xan. Well, like, on your. Like, I'm happy you're a performer, mama.
Justin
You're performing rap diva.
Tana
Give the people what they want, Diva.
Justin
I'm really happy you're out of that era of your life, though. I will say all of it.
Paige
The music, too. Like, it's not. I don't think there is a part of me that wants to do some, like, funny, but, like, it'll never be taken that seriously again. And I want you to do, like.
Justin
A Hootie country song something.
Paige
Hootie is fun.
Justin
Something. Make a little line dance, too, because I'm trying to prep, you know, for.
Tana
Dancing with the Stars.
Paige
It's so funny. The other day I got a sound promo for that Charlie XCX song. And so then it was like, they were like, you have to learn the dance in order to get paid.
Tana
Apple.
Paige
I'm in this position where it's like, in order to get paid for this. Tick tock. I have to learn this dance.
Tana
She's sitting there two hours on her hips the whole time.
Paige
Two hours, and I couldn't do it. Two hours and I could not do it.
Justin
It's so.
Paige
I love it.
Justin
It's so cute. I was doing it on my little.
Paige
Water tower the other day, but that's what I mean. Like, some people have it in them somehow.
Tana
Some can just renegade. Others can't.
Justin
Charlie, right? I miss her.
Paige
Right?
Tana
Holy.
Justin
Wait, what else do we have? We? Well, that's not really that important, I guess.
Paige
Do you know Rosa Park's husband had a car? Really? Think about what I just Said to you, I'm actually gonna get a better.
Justin
Why was she on the bus?
Paige
There we go.
Justin
Yeah, we talked too much though, about Rosa. Like she didn't do anything wrong. You know what I mean? Like, I know, but it's like no notes. You know what I mean? Like there's no nothing she should have done different.
Tana
Currently.
Paige
I agree.
Justin
Including getting in the car.
Tana
Yeah. Maybe she should have just what called an Uber.
Paige
It's so crazy times.
Justin
Can you. You know what me up is that I went to all of high school and all of most of college without Uber existing.
Tana
It's the craziest Postmates. What the.
Justin
Oh, I would have been toes.
Tana
Listen, it's gotten to the point where like I will be in bed and I will order a crunchwrap and I'm like actually bring it upstairs to my apartment, come through the front door and deliver it to my bed. Well, yeah, like, I give the instructions. I'm like, first store on the right, come into my room, 100%, drop it off.
Paige
Doordash and Postmates are the worst thing to ever happen to me. But that I do think about that often. Cuz like, I know money and I couldn't drive. So like the I would have to do to get a ride now, like, like I've sucked it for a ride.
Justin
You were like, really resourceful. I never really like, I guess I didn't have to deal with that at that time.
Paige
Do you know that Uber was such a, like beta startup in the beginning of it that I was sponsored by Uber? Like I got free rides in in exchange for posting.
Justin
My number one expenditure is like, is first of all meal delivery services and Uber, like I would have designer bag on designer bag if I just didn't Uber. Like Uber eats every single meal.
Paige
I thought it was gonna be forever. It was free.
Justin
It was genuinely free. But it's like literally meal. It's like, it's control. Like, it helps me a little bit because like, I'm such a like crazy binger and stuff. Like, not that that's like a horrible thing, but I literally, I can't even keep food in my house.
Tana
That's my problem. If I go grocery shopping, I have three bags of chips in my, in my pantry, clearing all of them one sitting.
Justin
Yeah, I don't know grocery shop. So I'll come home with only tortillas and I'm like, fuck, what the fuck am I supposed to do with this?
Tana
Yeah. And also like, buying all the ingredients to make a proper meal is gonna cost more than what it Just cost to post me.
Justin
That's why I could fuck with, like a. Fuck with, like, one of those services that, like, I did, which. Well, I did one recently. I don't even remember.
Paige
Like, hello, Fresh. Like those.
Justin
No, no, no. I did a. Oh factor, I think, is what it was. It was where it's like, they literally.
Paige
It'S already packaged and you got six of those.
Justin
They're so. Oh, it was so good.
Tana
But I also, like. And doing the dishes after I come home from working, the last thing I want to do is cook a meal and clean the motherfucking dish.
Paige
I was just going to say is I'm so about, like, ROIs. I'm so about my return on investment. The amount of fucking time it takes to cook a meal and then wolf it in 30 seconds. I'm sorry. Yeah, I'd rather be facetuning.
Justin
Well, that's why I always. I think. I think that's why I attached myself to Bulldog like, the way I did. Because I could just eat it right out of the pan.
Tana
Yeah. But even cleaning the pan after, oh, I'm so lazy when it comes to that.
Justin
I just put it right in the dishwasher.
Tana
Then it's like running it empty.
Paige
Why does the dishwasher feel like a cyber drug to me? Like, I can't figure that out.
Tana
And like, doing laundry. That pile will sit on the end of my bed for a week.
Justin
You guys, I did the worst thing for myself and I bought this, like, laundry hamper. If you knew about it, you would be toast.
Paige
Do tell.
Justin
It's the biggest laundry hamper you've ever seen. It like, it looks like it's like a commercial, like, hotel size, like, laundry hamper. It was on Amazon, I think it was like 30 bucks. And my friend told me not to buy it because she was like, you will never do laundry because you have so many, like, so much room in there. You'll never. You'll have items you don't see for six months. And it. Boy, was that the truth. I had, like, like, literally, like Brooks gone missing in there. Like, it's actually that bad. Also, Murphy shit in my closet yesterday.
Tana
Oh, Murph.
Paige
Well, I was gonna say, this is why I'm all about outsourcing men. Miko has been doing.
Justin
That's good.
Paige
An la man would never at all.
Justin
I did finally hire Allison full time, except I realized, like, I was so busy for a second that I was like, oh, my God, I can't. I cannot survive without an assistant. And then everything went silent and all Of a sudden, I have nothing for her to do. And so she's over. And I'm like, we're just, like, watching Love island. Like, she's getting paid. And I'm like, but, like, I promised.
Tana
Her 40 hours a week.
Paige
Why did Murphy. You could knock out a lot in 40 hours with love island, though.
Justin
I know Murphy in the closet because she was afraid of Justin Horowitz. Justin came over and he was, like, taunting her.
Tana
No.
Justin
And, like, she was, like. She just was afraid to come out and use her litter box. So she in the club, but she's never done something.
Paige
Why is that mean when I don't want to see people that are in my house?
Tana
If I had a dick, I would be peeing in bottles off my bed.
Paige
Oh, my God. The way men can drive and piss in a Gatorade bottle. You know, they make women. But there's no point in my life where I'm suction cupping. Ow. I hurt myself.
Tana
Yeah.
Justin
Simon, cupping suctionist. Simon's mom, Birdie invented it.
Tana
Yeah.
Paige
So I just punched myself in the clit. I actually need a second.
Justin
It's like when you do your little.
Tana
Yeah, you go, Yahoo. Yahoo. You're mj. Yeah.
Paige
Big difference.
Alex
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Paige
Oh, I'm so sad about this, Paige.
Justin
Do you want to talk about it, or do you want me?
Paige
I think you start. Let's go chronological. Your dm. My reaction.
Justin
So the shirt I'm wearing today, my first lady shirt that I wore for my little meeting, is from Pepper Mayo. Okay? It's brand. It's one of my favorite brands. We love DM'd me recently. And they were like, listen, we are bringing some girls to the ERAS tour in London, okay? And but in the message, not this isn't a but, but like, but it says, we want to bring you and Tana. So I was like, oh, my God. I'm praying to God that Tana get first of all, it's free. Second of all, wants to go brand safe era. Yes. And so I send it to Tana. Well, first of all, I say, urgent 911 dying. Wake up right now.
Paige
And everyone has to stop doing that unless people are dead. But that's another conversation.
Justin
Ask me what time she text me back.
Tana
4:00Pm 6.
Justin
Check out urgent 91 1.
Tana
Right.
Justin
6:00Pm she responds to me and she says, what? I send it to her and. And it says, we have limited capacity. Like, there's only so much space in the suites. So, like, it's. We can only offer it to you too. And we worked our little magic. We were like, how insane would it be to surprise Paige? My management puts. Gets the emails today, gets all.
Paige
I'm so excited. And so I message Pepper Mayo and I say, hey, like, I thank you so much for the invite. I'll pay if you don't want to. Obviously, it's another additional person. Can I please bring my best friend who's also my assistant. She loves Taylor Swift more than anything. And I had this whole content plan. We were going to surprise the fuck out of you. But it's my bad for not telling my managers and your managers that this is a surprise to you because it just goes down to show, like, Paige, I could not do anything without you knowing. Like, there was a point where I wanted to surprise you with the car. And I was like, I would just have to tell you, like, you're two in my email, you're two in my bank, you're two in my flights, everything. Yeah, like, there's no. There's no possible way.
Tana
Yeah. And listen, you hit it really well up until this morning. I got the text and yeah, my.
Justin
Management put her into a chat. Like, literally a group chat.
Tana
A group chat. And she was like, hey, so about Taylor Swift. And I go, oh, no. And I was like, I think Tana was going to surprise me with this. Which.
Paige
But this is also always what I get for, like, trying to put my David Dobrik hat on like that. This is not the type of content you make. You're not. I remember at one time I surprised Sky Brie with a Bottega bag and, like, brought the wrong Bottega box, posted it and it flopped. No one gave a fuck. Like, my return on investment was not there. Like, like it. It's just not my. The forte.
Justin
But listen, the car, Slade.
Tana
The car, Slade.
Paige
But that's because I was there. I don't know if we've actually ever talked about the actual peril and mental hell I had to go through. And I still think you knew low key.
Justin
Yeah, I totally knew.
Paige
That's what I'm saying. Like, like, actually surprising anyone. We live too much of a close.
Justin
Like, there's a lot of, like, logistics that go in buying a car. You can't just, like. Oh, you can't just, like, toss someone a car. Like, you have to have help or, like.
Tana
Like, it's a whole thing scrambling.
Paige
But, yeah, you're going to Taylor Swift in London.
Tana
First of all, I'm so excited. And also, it's so sweet of both of you to even, like.
Justin
Well, it was her idea. I was. I don't know why I even started taking credit.
Tana
Okay.
Paige
Okay.
Tana
I'm like, so anyway, I'm like, it's gonna let you. That's sweet. That's why.
Justin
That's why I owned up to it.
Tana
That is. First of all, like, honestly, I'm like, surprise aside, it's so fucking sweet of you to even invite me to do that. And, like, you know how much I love her, and that is like, my.
Paige
If I went to the ERA tour in London and I left you in Los Angeles. Angeles, I might as well be.
Justin
Overseas without you. If she. No offense.
Paige
Did you just say Hitler?
Tana
Yeah, Okay.
Paige
I was gonna say that. And then I worked. I, like, went back and said the devil. Oh, but it was cute that, like, you took what I was gonna say.
Tana
But, like, it really is, like, that's so cute of you to even do. And, like, also for Tana to, like, plan a surprise for me, like, also takes a lot for her because I am her and, like, I handle everything. So she was like, what? She texted me. She's like, what are you doing? August 14th through the 18th? And I was like, I don't think anything.
Paige
And she's me adding through the 18th because I want to go to, like, Positano. Were you saved by someone who wanted me?
Tana
But, like, seriously, that's so cute. And I was so excited. And, like, I got the text this morning. I was like, oh, that's obviously Brooke.
Paige
Also did eat with the fact that I will never go overseas without you.
Tana
Yeah.
Paige
Like, Ibiza. We already know what happened.
Justin
I've never been overseas. I've never left the country except for to go to Mexico, which, like, is, like, not immunity.
Paige
I'm so excited that our first time is together.
Justin
I know. And all of us, we need somebody.
Paige
There for, like, you know, moral support, help, anything.
Tana
But also, the three of us in a box at Taylor Swift. Oh, my God.
Paige
It's gonna be the best.
Justin
And with Tortured Poets Department.
Paige
Oh, my God, it's gonna be the best lived. I can't wait for I can do.
Justin
It with a broken. What we're going through today with Greg Greg.
Tana
I can't wait to be Scream singing.
Paige
It's so funny, too, that we're going to London. Because I've said this, I vocalize this. I used to hate London so much and going there, but it's only because I only, like. I had a lot of bad experiences there. Now I love it so much because I got to, like, rewrite it. But you're going to love London so much.
Justin
Really.
Tana
And I want to. Buckingham Palace.
Justin
How'd you know I was going to say that?
Paige
Because I want to go. And don't you think a lot of the reason.
Justin
See if they can get the smile.
Paige
The Peppa Pig bus tour.
Justin
Oh, my gosh.
Tana
Oh, I can.
Paige
So.
Tana
I'm so excited. Yep.
Paige
It's gonna be. It's so funny. A lot of the reasons that I hate London, or used to, are reasons I think you'll love it even more. Like, I've always said, like, I really don't think people from the UK like Americans and they, like, judge us. But you love being in an environment because you want, like, prove them wrong, like, type shit. Like, you're gonna love it.
Justin
You're gonna be shaking about, like. Is that where Adele's from?
Paige
Probably.
Justin
I want to be Adele so bad.
Paige
Hello.
Tana
But I'm so excited.
Justin
It's gonna be everything.
Paige
Paige. Surprise. Yeah, it's my fault, though. I'm not. I can't blame your management for doing that, because it's like, if I wanted to surprise her, I should have told. I should have battened down the hatches.
Tana
Batten them down. But listen, regardless. It's still so insane. I'm so excited.
Paige
It's gonna be so much fucking fun.
Justin
What if the surprise is that we were punky you the whole time? No, it's not happening.
Tana
There's actually nothing better.
Paige
It's so funny how, like, nice you are. Like, I would beat the out of me if I was punking you. And you're, like, screaming, like, down for it. You know, the other day, I, like, I'm buying Isabella this purse, right? And I texted Paige, wait, this one's crazy. I texted Paige and I said, also, did you order Isabella's Goyard or no? Like, because I'm getting her this bag, whatever. And Paige was going to order it, right? And I go, I'm fine with no by the way we'll go get, like, as a. Me and Isabella will go get it. Like, I'll take her to go get it. But I. I didn't put an apostrophe, so it just said, well, go get. And Paige responds, and she goes, omg. No, I was gonna go in person, but honestly, I'm ordering it. And I go, oh, yeah, I'll go with Bella ordering a scammy. She goes, I thought you meant, well, go get it. I'm like, why the. She responds so nicely. Then she's like, did you go get?
Tana
She's like, did you order it yet or did you get it? Yeah, you should have been like, okay.
Paige
And she was like, oh, omg. No, I was gonna go in person, but honestly, ordering, like, if I said, well, go get, you should have beat the brakes off.
Tana
Like, that's just funny. Like, well, go get it, then.
Paige
That is, like, your big. That's one of our biggest strong suits, I think, is that, like, we have this in common. I almost think if someone's being like, an. Like, we just take it funny.
Tana
I think it's funny. Like, if you told him.
Justin
Just roll with the punches.
Tana
Like, if she was like, well, go get it, then I'd be like, I.
Paige
But, like, I'm like, now, like, I'm perceiving that. Like, if I said, well, go get it, then, like, beat the out of me.
Justin
I would have. I would have caused a scene.
Paige
Absolutely.
Tana
The way I really thought, I was.
Paige
Like, okay, I'm excited for Taylor Swift. I'm so smallest man who ever lived. Live. I actually might need a 5150 after been there.
Tana
Oh, I can't wait.
Paige
We love you, Pepper Mayo. Wait.
Tana
And I really hope she does. So long, London. I don't even know if that's, like, interesting.
Justin
Well, but she has that list.
Tana
I need to figure it out.
Justin
She has to do it in London.
Paige
We have to find out the set list before so we can really be prepared.
Tana
And if it's not in the set list, it better be her surprise song.
Justin
And I want Travis Kelce there so that I can feel his energy in the room.
Paige
We love you, Pepper Mayo. Seriously. Thank you.
Tana
Thank you. I'm so excited.
Paige
Do you know that Paige told me she's only been to a Cheesecake Factory, like, 10 or 15 times in her life?
Justin
I've only done Coke 10 to 15 times. Remember when Lindsay said that?
Paige
Oh, yeah. I bet you were saying that.
Justin
Actually, like, I've probably only been there.
Tana
Maybe, like, realistically think about it. I could, like, Count them all. My cheesecake experience.
Justin
Well, I was too poor to go to Cheesecake Factory. Growing, like, that's like a. I thought that was, like, really same. It is.
Paige
I mean, I would make men pay. Awful. But Justin and Mikey, wherever you are, thank you for buying me Cheesecake Factory for years.
Tana
Thank you, Justin.
Justin
That is really nice. But.
Tana
But the brown bread, everything adds up.
Justin
Oh, my God. It's so. But that's why. I mean, I was. I was like you. It was really showing for a little while. On Brooks Gofield.
Tana
How many Chick Fil A sandwiches do you think you could eat?
Paige
My favorite conversation.
Tana
I've been asking everyone this question, genuinely. Okay, ready? You have 30 minutes. How many Chick Fil A sandwiches could you eat before you're about to burst? Like, so three.
Justin
But I would have to eat them quickly because it's like, it's the time in between the bites that makes me feel like I can eat. Like.
Paige
I agree with that.
Tana
Okay. Okay. What about no time limit?
Justin
Well, it's like, it has to happen in 30 minutes or it won't happen. Like, if I give myself more than that, I'll just feel full.
Paige
Okay, what about 24 hours?
Tana
Okay. Okay, that's.
Paige
What about in 24 hours? How many could you have?
Tana
Or just how many back to back before you are ready to explode?
Justin
Three. Why?
Tana
Eight.
Paige
I have a. I have a problem because I get full really fast, but then I'm hungry again in, like, 20.
Tana
Yeah.
Paige
So, like, it's. I could only probably do, like, two fast, but then if you gave me, like, 24 hours, I could have 30.
Justin
Well, if you gave me a Chick Fil a sandwich and then you gave me an entire pot of bulldog. And, like, it has to feel different to me for me to house everything, but I can't do, like, seven.
Paige
Marijuana is also a huge factor. I love marijuana. For that quick respawn.
Tana
We got a stomach. I'm like, someone get Joey Chestnut on the mic. I want to do a Chick Fil A sandwich. Eat off.
Paige
Oh, my God, let's do it.
Tana
I really think I could do, like, seven.
Justin
Can we do mukbangs on Patreon?
Tana
Hold the fucking phone. You know what we need.
Paige
Yeah, but then I'm gonna have to do lipo on Patreon, and that's okay.
Tana
Two hands. Korean corn dogs.
Justin
I've never had one. Still. And I have to go to Koreatown to pick up a cat because that's where all the good ones are.
Tana
That's where you got yours, baby kitten love.
Justin
Yeah.
Paige
If you don't try that corn dog. Before we speak next. I don't even know next episode, I.
Justin
Have to have the one with, like.
Paige
The little yellow things on the hot Cheeto one. And it, like, has cinnamon in it weirdly, too. And you know I love cinnamon and cheese together.
Tana
We need to get Trish.
Justin
I don't know that.
Tana
Yeah.
Paige
Cinnamon twist with Taco Bell nacho cheese. You know?
Justin
Oh, you're right. You're right, you're right.
Tana
We need to get Trisha here, and we all need to have the Korean corn dogs.
Paige
That could be a Patreon special.
Justin
Yeah. Because that kind of gives, like, phallic. Oh.
Paige
Because it looks like a ween. Do you know that there's conspiracy theories that Disney released the movie Frozen because so many people were looking up Walt Disney Frozen. They thought, like, Walt Disney was like. Do you know what I mean? Like, Frozen.
Justin
It's giving Tana Mongeau canceled.
Tana
That makes so much sense. So much sense.
Paige
That was it on that one. I don't know. I saw a viral clip of people saying that today, and I was like, wait, we could recreate that.
Tana
Can you pull up the Disney logo for a second? I have some shit to say.
Paige
Okay, Gives me.
Tana
That says, give me.
Paige
Don't say that, because Lila will be on something tomorrow.
Tana
That is not a d. That's a gift. My entire life as a kid, I thought it was Disney.
Justin
Yeah. Could you imagine, like, liability is now, like, Disney Channel, Gibney Channel.
Tana
And you're watching Gibney Channel.
Paige
Kind of iconic. She should do it.
Justin
You just gave her something good.
Paige
Oh, I agree with you. Now, I want to ask if you've ever experienced dyslexia. Yeah.
Justin
Oh, my God. I dated this guy who was. He said he was dyslexic, but he was really just illiterate. And it's the funniest. Literally, like, funny. I played a. What's that game, like, Quiplash with him the other day, and it was so funny because you just always knew what he wrote because it was. He can't spell. And it was so cute.
Tana
Yeah, that's Gets me.
Paige
Anything I could say about that situation would feel regressive.
Justin
He wasn't dyslexic, though. I'm not making fun of his disability. He's.
Paige
He doesn't have a disability.
Justin
Is dyslexia is not a disability?
Paige
No, I think it is. But you're saying he's not dyslexic.
Justin
Oh, well, he might. I don't actually. Don't know. Wait, maybe that Was mean to say it was.
Tana
Here she goes. Apology tour. He's dyslexic. It's fine.
Paige
Someone's got to apologize because he's not.
Justin
Mixing up the words. He's just completely missing them.
Tana
That's me.
Justin
You know what I mean?
Paige
Yes. I dated someone with dyslexia.
Justin
I know. Bella Thorn.
Tana
She's.
Justin
She's like, dyslexia's number one.
Paige
You know what I love about her, though?
Tana
You have to text her in, like, binary. It's like, 011-10.
Paige
I don't even know what you're saying. I'm just laughing.
Justin
I have no idea what that means, but sometimes when I know a joke is too intelligent for me, I have to just. I laugh, and then I watch it.
Paige
Wait, I know it's funny, and I'll do my research later.
Justin
Yeah, exactly.
Tana
Thank you.
Paige
Do you know that she wrote an entire book and, like, refused to have people. I have it downstairs. There's a page about me. Love you, Bella. She refused to have anyone edit it. She was like, this is real. This is me. I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.
Tana
And she came up with Tana Mugadu because she didn't know how to spell it.
Justin
Didn't she have relations with Pete Davidson?
Paige
I think that's Olivia O'Brien.
Justin
Oh, same thing, right?
Tana
Basically. Red. Guys, I love you both so absolutely much.
Paige
Oh, but you have to go.
Tana
I have a heart out.
Paige
What if I went with you?
Justin
Wait.
Tana
I'm waiting.
Paige
I want to go with you.
Tana
Come with me.
Paige
Alyssa, Violet has an announcement in an hour.
Tana
Oh, I'm so excited.
Paige
I'm not.
Tana
Well, because I know it's gonna be trash. Garbage.
Paige
I'm hoping it's a Clinton situation, but I. Again, I said this on the last. Maybe on Patreon, where I, like, got warned by so many people that, like, she would do everything to, like, ruin you, lie, and try to take me down.
Justin
Well, I think. I think it would be me. I was the one who really reamed her. But I don't think she has any reason to want to take me down. I remember she didn't know who I was until a day ago.
Paige
I just, like, have spent so much of my life with, like, allegations against me that, like, aren't true or it. And I'm scared that's where this is going to go with her, and I'm going to have to, like, just have so much anxiety and, like, protect myself and, like.
Justin
Yeah.
Tana
Also, though, I've met Alyssa before, and she's literally so mean. So, yeah, I don't know.
Justin
I played the fifth. I'm scared of her.
Tana
No, you know what?
Paige
I'm not scared of her. I'm scared of having to deal with someone doing that announcement in an hour.
Justin
Why is everyone always, like, dropping, like. Like, we're not rappers. Like, what do you mean, July 12.
Paige
Like, yeah, what do you mean?
Justin
She was performing rap.
Paige
If it were a diss track, that would be iconic. I won't lie.
Justin
I think I would eat that up on.
Tana
Yeah, because you did your poetry. She's coming back with her diss track. Honestly, it's kind of beautiful.
Paige
Oh, God. I'm. I'm just like, you did a really.
Justin
Good poem and that. Everyone's really responding to it.
Tana
Well, Tina, you had me laughing out loud. I swear to God, I was watching.
Paige
That's all. Jake.
Tana
Laughing out loud.
Paige
I'm just saying. I'll say it again. Like, I would have never even thought to do something like that if it weren't for Jake.
Tana
The doordash line had me in tears. Had me in literal tears.
Paige
Can we just go over to Patreon before. I'm going to. Honestly, if you haven't subscribed to Patriot already, here's what I'm going to do over there, and I'll let you guys.
Justin
Know when you Fucking alcoholic.
Paige
Patreon.
Justin
Patreon.
Paige
Patreon.
Tana
Patron.
Paige
Okay, I'm going to be having.
Justin
I also could be wrong. Remember, I correct you all the time, and I'm always wrong.
Paige
I'm going to be having a panic attack over there for $10 a month if you guys like to join it.
Justin
And then it'll be posted by Go.
Tana
Get the Patreon, because I'm about to talk so much shit.
Paige
I love you guys. And thank you for listening to another episode of the canceled podcast page. Thank you for joining us. I think you brought the levity and the lighthearted nature that we needed this.
Tana
Week, and everyone touched slips.
Justin
You did. And I do apologize for not.
Paige
No, no, no. We've been going through.
Justin
I'm on a guilt day. I'm on a guilt day. Weird.
Tana
Everyone's slaying. I love you guys so fucking.
Paige
I love you both more than life itself.
Justin
I love you more than life itself.
Paige
We love you guys.
Tana
Did you.
Paige
Sorry. Bye, guys.
Tana
Thank you for joining me for Pajama Day. Guys, before I leave, I just want to plug my best friend and roommate, Emily Mast. She goes by Box Blonde, and her new single Warmer just came.
Paige
And we love her.
Tana
I love her so fucking much. She is so talented, gorgeous inside and out, and she is so fucking deserving. Please, please, please go stream. She deserves it more than anyone in the fucking world.
Paige
And that just attests to your character that the second you're sitting on a platform, you are plugging the people that you love and believe in. And I'm excited for them.
Justin
Special Send the elevator back down.
Tana
I'm sending it. You're coming to the top, baby. Hi, guys. I love you.
Justin
We love you, Paige.
Alex
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Cancelled Podcast Episode 92: Brooke and Tana React to Clinton Kane’s TikTok Series
Released on July 26, 2024, Cancelled brings listeners an unfiltered and intimate conversation between co-hosts Tana Mongeau and Brooke Schofield, alongside Justin, as they react to Clinton Kane’s recent TikTok series. This episode delves deep into the complexities of public scrutiny, personal relationships, and the turbulent dynamics between influencers.
The episode kicks off with a brief exchange among the hosts, setting a playful and candid tone. Brooke begins with an advertisement segment for Warby Parker, which is swiftly bypassed as Tana welcomes listeners back to the podcast.
The primary focus of this episode is the hosts' reaction to Clinton Kane’s extensive 29-part TikTok series. Tana and Brooke express a mix of frustration, disbelief, and emotional turmoil over Clinton’s portrayal and allegations.
Justin shares his feelings of being emasculated by Clinton's attempts to provoke vulnerability, stating, "It feels like you're emasculating me. Like you're trying to get me to... jump, you know?" (01:46).
Tana adds, "When you start howling, I'm gonna be collar and leash," highlighting the perceived manipulative tactics Clinton employs (02:13).
The hosts dissect Clinton’s claims, particularly focusing on accusations of lying and gaslighting.
Justin reveals, "They leaked our whole live shows... I sent those texts," defending his credibility and condemning the malicious intent behind the leaks (04:43).
Brooke sympathizes, noting the challenges of maintaining privacy and the relentless nature of internet scrutiny (05:22).
The conversation becomes deeply personal as the hosts recount their interactions and fallout with Clinton Kane.
Justin discusses the emotional validation he felt from some of the public support, despite the ongoing negativity, stating, "I have to say I did say I wanted to fuck the shit out of Kid Rock and I meant it" (12:10).
Tana shares her frustration with Clinton’s inability to acknowledge his shortcomings, "He could have just left me alone," emphasizing the need for boundaries (20:36).
Paige (Brooke) recounts similar sentiments, reflecting on the impact of Clinton's actions on their mental health and public image, "I don't know if we're ever going to get past this," (35:00).
The hosts delve into the emotional and psychological toll of dealing with public drama and personal conflicts.
Justin admits to feeling overwhelmed and the struggle with maintaining good vibes, "I'm gonna put my barefoot into this Patreon," indicating his attempts to find solace and positivity (03:49).
Tana emphasizes the importance of self-reflection and growth, stating, "Growing up too and realizing you don't need male validation," (49:45).
Paige discusses coping mechanisms and the journey towards healing, "I have to protect myself and..." (90:08).
The episode highlights the importance of female camaraderie and support in navigating personal and public challenges.
Tana praises the strength found in their friendship, "I'm just like, I will not be made a fool," reinforcing their collective resilience (42:04).
Paige underscores the value of accountability and mutual support, "I think you're succeeding," acknowledging Justin’s efforts towards personal growth (42:54).
Towards the end of the episode, the hosts share exciting news about upcoming events and collaborations.
Justin announces a planned trip to London for Taylor Swift’s ERA Tour, expressing enthusiasm for the experience, "It's gonna be the best live," (76:58).
Paige discusses previous performances and the impact of touring, sharing stories about managing overwhelming schedules and unexpected challenges (64:31).
Tana expresses excitement about attending the concert together, "I'm so excited. Yeah," highlighting their bond and shared experiences (80:15).
As the episode wraps up, the hosts reflect on their journey, the lessons learned from dealing with public controversy, and the importance of authenticity.
Justin acknowledges his flaws and the influence of his upbringing, "I'm trying to unpack it," emphasizing his ongoing journey towards self-improvement (50:05).
Tana and Paige reinforce the importance of self-worth and the strength derived from their friendship, concluding with heartfelt messages to their listeners (92:15).
Justin: "You just don't bark. Like, it's just not really my thing." (01:08)
Tana: "You do got that dog in you." (02:37)
Justin: "I did say I wanted to fuck the shit out of Kid Rock and I meant it." (12:10)
Paige: "Clinton Kane is dead." (20:31)
Tana: "We don't separate." (37:43)
Paige: "I have to protect myself and..." (90:08)
Justin: "I'm trying to unpack it." (50:05)
Tana: "I will not be made a fool." (42:04)
Paige: "I love you guys more than life itself." (92:26)
Episode 92 of Cancelled offers a raw and honest exploration of the intricate relationships and public battles that influencers like Tana Mongeau and Brooke Schofield navigate. Through their candid discussions, listeners gain insight into the challenges of maintaining authenticity amidst fame, the importance of supportive friendships, and the ongoing journey towards personal growth and resilience.
For those who haven't tuned in, this episode serves as a compelling entry point into the world of modern influencers grappling with personal and public conflicts, providing both entertainment and meaningful reflections.