95: BROOKE IS BEING BLACKMAILED…

Summary

Detailed Summary of "Cancelled with Tana Mongeau & Brooke Schofield" Episode 95: "BROOKE IS BEING BLACKMAILED…"

Release Date: September 14, 2024

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Introduction

In Episode 95 of "Cancelled with Tana Mongeau & Brooke Schofield," co-hosts Tana Mongeau and Brooke Schofield, along with their guest Makoa, tackle a distressing situation involving Brooke being blackmailed. The episode delves deep into personal vulnerabilities, experiences with media scrutiny, pop culture anecdotes, and relationship dynamics, offering listeners an intimate and unfiltered glimpse into the lives of these influencer personalities.

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1. Brooke's Blackmail Scare

The episode opens with Brooke sharing a terrifying experience where she received an anonymous email threatening her security. The email claimed that someone had hacked into her old apartment, possessing incriminating footage of her private moments, and demanded Bitcoin payments to erase the evidence.

Notable Quote:

• Brooke Schofield [02:14]: “...somebody sent me, like, it's literally a photo outside my apartment. ... It's so scary.”

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2. Tana's Concerns About Digital Privacy

Tana opens up about her fears of being watched through her screens, highlighting the pervasive anxiety celebrities feel about their digital footprints and privacy.

Notable Quote:

• Tana Mongeau [01:24]: “I've been fearing this moment for a long time...”

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3. Invasive Media Interviews

Makoa recounts a particularly invasive interview experience where a journalist relentlessly pressed him for personal details over an extended period, leaving him feeling exposed and uncomfortable.

Notable Quote:

• Makoa [09:44]: “I have never experienced what I experienced today. I told someone my life story from birth to now for... five and a half hours for an interview...”

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4. Paparazzi and Public Scrutiny

The hosts discuss a recent incident involving a friend being harassed by paparazzi, underscoring the relentless attention public figures endure and the impact it has on their mental well-being.

Notable Quote:

• Tana Mongeau [13:24]: “I had my first horrible experience with paparazzi the other night...”

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5. Vegas Adventures and Celebrity Encounters

Makoa shares entertaining stories from his recent trip to Las Vegas, including an unexpected encounter with Kevin Hart at a high-limit casino. Hart offers him heartfelt advice about authenticity and staying true to oneself.

Notable Quote:

• Makoa [19:57]: “...I see Kevin Hart at a High limit room at 9am... he ended up giving me... the best, nicest advice ever.”

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6. Exploring Emotions with "Inside Out"

The conversation shifts to a discussion about the animated movie "Inside Out," where both Tana and Makoa reflect on their own emotional experiences and how understanding complex emotions has aided their personal growth.

Notable Quotes:

• Makoa [35:49]: “I had a nightmare that we all went out... and I realize this could mean something...”
• Tana Mongeau [39:47]: “I have anxiety as a child, and I didn't know the word. ...”

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7. Relationship Dynamics and Breaking Negative Patterns

Tana and Makoa engage in a heartfelt dialogue about their relationship patterns, specifically Tana's anxious-avoidant attachment style. They explore strategies to break unhealthy cycles and foster healthier relationships through open communication and self-awareness.

Notable Quotes:

• Tana Mongeau [70:58]: “I need to break old patterns...”
• Makoa [73:01]: “Over communicate and bear your soul...”

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8. Pop Culture and True Crime Interests

The hosts dive into recent pop culture topics, including Anna Delvey's appearance on "Dancing with the Stars," and discuss their fascination with true crime documentaries. They draw parallels between sensationalized media portrayals and real-life experiences.

Notable Quotes:

• Tana Mongeau [45:18]: “She holds onto her actual receipts for so long...”
• Makoa [50:39]: “Anna Delvey on Dancing with the Stars...”

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9. Tour Preparations and Future Plans

As the episode nears its conclusion, Tana and Makoa discuss their upcoming tour preparations. They express excitement about engaging with fans across the country and hint at potential future episodes featuring guest Alex Moran to delve deeper into influencer lore.

Notable Quote:

• Makoa [85:32]: “We have a lot of preparing to do for this final leg of the canceled cross country tour...”

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Conclusion

Episode 95 of "Cancelled" offers a comprehensive and candid exploration of the personal and professional challenges faced by Tana Mongeau, Brooke Schofield, and Makoa. From dealing with blackmail threats and invasive media to navigating complex emotions and relationship patterns, the hosts provide listeners with an authentic and engaging narrative. The blend of vulnerability, humor, and insightful discussions ensures that both long-time fans and new listeners find value and relatability in the episode.

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Note: Advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content sections have been omitted to focus solely on the substantive discussions and key moments of the episode.

Transcript

[Brooke Schofield]

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[Tana Mongeau]

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[Brooke Schofield]

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[Tana Mongeau]

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[Brooke Schofield]

What makes a great pair of glasses? At Warby Parker, it's all the invisible extras without the extra cost. Their designer quality frames start at $95, including prescription lenses plus scratch resistant, smudge resistant and anti reflective coatings and UV protection and free adjustments for life. To find your next pair of glasses, sunglasses or contact lenses, or to find the Warby Parker store nearest you, head over to warby parker.com that's warby parker.com.

[Makoa]

Hello and welcome back to the canceled podcast. Hello. Hello.

[Tana Mongeau]

Honestly, I need to get something off my chest.

[Makoa]

Like flummediately.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I mean, if you have. You want to start, you can.

[Makoa]

I can't stop with flumazing and flummedia.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think you need to flip. Stop.

[Makoa]

I literally need to flip. Stop right now. But I literally flick. Can't. No, you. You need to get something off of your chest. What's up?

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I've been. Okay. So I have a lot of fears in life, and one of them, like, one of my major ones, I think this is like, pretty common, is that somebody's watching me back through my screen. You know what I'm saying? Like, they say that sometimes you can like, hack and you can.

[Makoa]

Oh my God. I taped my laptop screen for like years. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

So that's something I'm like, very aware of already.

[Makoa]

So if you're like, rating, do you face your phone to the ceiling?

[Tana Mongeau]

100%.

[Makoa]

Oh my God. Okay, I get it. Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Makoa]

Totally not from personal experience.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's what I was getting at, but I didn't want to say those words, like, straight up. I get an email the other day with, that's my apartment. Not my current apartment, but my last apartment. Can you just read that?

[Makoa]

Oh, my God.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wait, I want to read it to the people. Or should you read it to the people? You don't have to read the whole thing, but, like, get the gist.

[Makoa]

What? Brooke, it's so weird, like, when I watch things like this happen to you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Because it's like, yeah, like a normal person would be like, probably calling the police.

[Makoa]

No. But also, most people would not be like, oh my God, this happened to me, like, this is. Okay, go read this.

[Tana Mongeau]

So basically, somebody sent me, like, it's literally a photo outside my apartment. Okay. And I don't live in my old apartment, but still, I mean, that was my building, so that's scary. I suggest you read this message very carefully. Take a moment to chill, breathe, and analyze it thoroughly. Because you're about to discuss a deal between you and me, and I do not play games. You don't know anything about me, whereas I know you very well. And right now you're wondering how. Right. Well, you've been treading on thin ice with your browsing habits. Scrolling through filthy videos and clicking on links, stumbling onto some not so safe sites. I actually placed a spyware software called blah, blah, blah, blah. Basically they say, oh, what have I done? I've been keeping tabs on your pathetic little life for a long or a while now. It is simply your misfortune that I saw your bad deeds. I gave in more days that I probably should have, looking at your data, extracted quite a few or quite a bit of juicy information out of your system. And I have seen it all. Yep. I've got footage of you doing filthy things in your room. Nice setup, by the way. Is that not the fucking most eerie thing?

[Makoa]

What do they mean, nice setup?

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, they're saying, like, they know what my room looks like. Like, nice setup.

[Makoa]

Are you buying, like, weird viruses on the Dark Web that I should know about? Are you going to kill me with a wild staph infection? I just saw a Netflix episode about that someone.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I saw that, too. Okay, yes.

[Makoa]

You're doing none of that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Roommates or whatever. Yes, or, like, whatever. Okay. Anyway, I have. Hold on. I then developed videos and screenshots where one. On. Where on one side of the screen, there's videos you had been playing, and on the other part is you doing inappropriate things. Basically, it's saying that they, like, recorded me masturbating, which I know better than to think you could have done that because I am preventative. I have been fearing this moment for a long time. I have already thought this one through. Okay, but basically the gist, no chat.

[Makoa]

Roulette, no nothing weird.

[Tana Mongeau]

No cam girls, no nothing, nothing. But they did give me an amount that I could send them in Bitcoin in order to have this wiped.

[Makoa]

Both of them for you to even for, like, for them to assume that you.

[Tana Mongeau]

First of all, what am I? Faze Banks? What the hell is bitcoin? Anyway, I didn't send the money, obviously. So if you guys see Any weird stuff circulating? It's a. I can't believe you save.

[Makoa]

This for the podcast. I'd be. I'd be losing it because it's things like that and people like that. But exactly what they want to get out of you is you to be paranoid for no reason. Just about, like, living your normal life.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

And. But I'm like, I fall victim every time like that. I'm like, what is that?

[Tana Mongeau]

That was, like, really a photo of my building.

[Makoa]

Yeah. They're like, you were looking at these really weird dresses on revolve. Like, I just can't imagine you doing weird shit on a computer. But people don't strike me as that person.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And I don't. I'm like, already paranoid. Like, I don't do anything weird on the computer.

[Makoa]

So you think it's just, like, a weird person with, like, 1% hacking skills who's like.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, it's like, it's a thing. I saw another scam that's been going on lately where, like, people do like that. You know how you can make a. Like, make people call each other. Like, they're calling to me all the time. They're calling people, like, as the police department saying, like, you have warrants out for your arrest, like, blah, blah, blah, and, like, getting people to spend money in order to, like, get things wiped. And then it's like, not a real thing, basically. Like, there's so many ways to scam people. But I'm not getting scammed today because I have better things to spend.

[Makoa]

Do you think that has something to do with your fame or do you think that this person is.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I'm sure that that happens to, like, a bunch of people. Because. Because it's like, addresses are public information. Like. Or not public information, but, like, you wouldn't find most of my previous addresses online. That's like, a thing.

[Makoa]

Yeah. You have to start putting them in, like, a fake name.

[Tana Mongeau]

A fake name? I do now, but didn't then.

[Makoa]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

So anyway.

[Makoa]

Okay. Cyber bully the movie.

[Tana Mongeau]

Isn't that kind of scary?

[Makoa]

That's like, just wild. That's so wild and creepy. Well, as long as you're not, like, doing weird shit on chat roulette. You're. You don't know that many Bitcoin.

[Tana Mongeau]

And honestly, I could use, like. Well, no, I was gonna say, like, Kim Kardashian slayed it with a sex tape. I feel like, what? Worst case scenario, you see. What, Me walking around my house naked. Oh, no.

[Makoa]

Yeah. It's not the end of the world.

[Tana Mongeau]

I Didn't get these tits for nothing.

[Makoa]

See, we don't. We just don't relate. Not realm there. I'm just.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, I was thinking about it today because, like, there's a building outside my window that's out of cont construction for, like, six years. And I had one of my boyfriends there this morning, and he was like, they can just see right in here. And I'm like, yeah, I give him a show every day.

[Makoa]

But sometimes. Do you ever just have really ugly sex? Like, I feel like, no, that's not.

[Tana Mongeau]

The kind of show I'm talking about. I'm talking about, like, me, like, making a scrambled egg with my titties out.

[Makoa]

Okay. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I'm not like. But are you never not just swinging. Swinging around in that way?

[Makoa]

I just feel like sometimes I. I put my hot girl pants on, but sometimes I am just doing fugly naked. Or I'm having, like, every time me and Macoa have sex, like, afterwards, I'm like, sometimes I'll be like, that wasn't. Like, if that was the sex tape. Like, if that was a hidden camera, like, I'd be livid. Like, you know what I mean? Just starfish. Like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, because if it looks good, it's probably not good.

[Makoa]

Yeah, it's.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, but also, like, they don't work at night, and I also only work at night, so.

[Makoa]

Wait, who doesn't work?

[Tana Mongeau]

You know what I mean? I'm not, like, just, like, getting in the middle of the day. Yeah.

[Makoa]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Mm. Well, I wish I were.

[Makoa]

I don't like daytime sex, though.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, I do. I love it.

[Makoa]

Do you like morning? Morning sex?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes.

[Makoa]

Overnight sex. I see. I just. I don't want to see anything in broad daylight. Like, I prefer the darkness. No, I'm.

[Tana Mongeau]

What are you seeing?

[Makoa]

I don't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, I'm not seeing a guy.

[Makoa]

Be like. Like, while he's coming. Oh, my God. Like, in broad daylight.

[Tana Mongeau]

Why did you have to do that?

[Makoa]

I don't know. It's just who I am.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, but I'm just thinking, like, oh, I just opened my eyes behind me.

[Makoa]

But have you ever had some morning sex where you're like, fuck, I wish it was dark out for this one.

[Tana Mongeau]

I mean, I'm sure. But that's just, like, when I. When I'm in the mood.

[Makoa]

You're the horniest in the morning.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

See, and I'm not a morning person. That says everything about us. Like, in the morning, I'm like, ugh. Like, the idea of going like this, like, oh, my God. My wrist is tired.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, I'm not saying, like, you don't. There's not a lot of work that's happening in the morning. You're just laying there. Well, I'm just laying there. No matter. I don't care what the hour. I'm just laying there. Let that be known. Today, Bibi described her. She was, like, talking about, like, you know how a normal person would say, like, dead fish?

[Makoa]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

And she was like. And I was just there, like a sardine. I'm like, sardine?

[Makoa]

I think there's just 10 other people.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, why did it have to be a specific dead fish?

[Makoa]

That's fair.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, that's really made me laugh. And I'm sure she would love that I shared that information.

[Makoa]

I don't even want to say this on the podcast. Well, first of all, I just want to say that today I thought I was doing an interview, which I do quite frequently, right? Whether it's a podcast, whether it's an interview for a publication. I dabble in my interviews now and again. And I was told by my management that a magazine wanted to do a profile on me. And I was like, that's perfectly fine. Tell them to come over. And I've been doing what I do for a living now for 12 plus years, and I have never experienced what I experienced today. I told someone my life story from birth to now for, like, five and a half hours for an interview while they were, like, writing on a little book.

[Tana Mongeau]

Why did she have, like, a quill, Brooke? And I'm like, do you do. Are we not past this, like, technologically appreciate the media?

[Makoa]

Right? Like, there is obviously in what we do, negative and positive sides to the media, you know, And I understand that a journalist and an interviewer is going to be pushing for a little more or they're going to ask a little more. But I have never felt pushed like this.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my God.

[Makoa]

Like, this person was, like, begging Makoa in front of, like, begging Makoa to his face to interview him, like, for this profile.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. When you're on the spot to be like.

[Makoa]

And like, he politely declines. He politely declines again. They're asking me, like, it, like, just pushing for, like, you know what I mean? Like, like, I. We said no, like, 10 times. And it's like, don't say you want to do a profile on me and then come to my house and beg to interview McCoy. That's, you know, and just begging for a house tour, asking for, like, the square footage of my house. Exactly how much money we make. On canceled. Exactly how much money I make on tour? Exactly my thoughts on.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, it's like, how is that relevant to the story?

[Makoa]

Like. Like, can I say. Can I ask how many bedrooms are in your house? Trying to get a tour? And I'm like, no, I have stalkers. I never want anyone to know the layout of my house. Could I give a rough estimate how many bedrooms of Are in your house? No, I have stalkers. I really don't want to say how many bedrooms are in my house or how many floors it is. Okay. Do you think you could just ballpark me the square footage? Like, just so I can kind of. You understand that people kind of want it? No, I'm really sorry. I have a soccer. Like, this is what it felt like for, like, five hours of just being pushed to, like, how painful it. And you know me. Like, things like that upset me because I give so much.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

So it's like I'm standing on business about certain things, and it just felt like a lot of pushing and pulling to create, like, leaving the house, say, taking photos of the kitchen, photos of everything. And I'm like, this is not what I signed up for. And now one of her questions was like, I forget what it was. And she was like, why do you think you're so open to talk about sex online? Like, you know, and now I'm sitting here about to talk about sex online, and I'm like, should I be like, it just has me in my own head because I was, like, talking about everything. Dude, it was crazy. She was asking me about, like, my childhood and, like, how abusive it was and, like, whatever. And I said an anecdote on Trisha's podcast about how one time my dad threw a MacBook brick in my head. And she's sitting there being like, can you tell me more about the MacBook brick of your head? And I'm like, no, I'm gonna leave that for my. I'm gonna leave that for my book. And she's like, okay, but how did it feel when the MacBook brick hit your head? It's like, did you just hear me? Like, it was the most insane.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, what did it sound like?

[Makoa]

Like, I know. I'm not kidding. She was like, did your head go wrong and start charging? Like, it's like, it was the weirdest shit where I was just, like, saying no to someone for five hours while being, like, grilled uncomfortably on my life. You get here, she starts grilling you. Like, it was just.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know. I felt your tension, so I tried to Take a load off.

[Makoa]

Yeah, it just, it was just so.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, you're so much better than me, though. I honestly commend you for standing on business because I could never. I would have given her everything she wanted and then I would have like, literally wanted to die after.

[Makoa]

Well, she was like begging me to cook an egg for the story for an hour.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think that she was like, it could have taken some of that. Like, you know what I mean?

[Makoa]

I think that they just can't lie. So she wanted to set a scene. Like, I would have been like, if.

[Tana Mongeau]

You don't tell them I'm cooking an egg right now.

[Makoa]

That's. That's the point. Like, I'm not about to get up and scramble an egg for you. Like, I might as well have symbols.

[Tana Mongeau]

And start doing hungry.

[Makoa]

No. Like, it was like an hour of her begging me to cook this egg and I was like, if that's what you need to make this story, then we shouldn't be doing this. Like, it was just. So drink.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's like an ad they have like in the middle of the.

[Makoa]

For like Eggland's Best. Yes. Like, I. I don't know, I just. And I talked for five hours straight about my life and I just almost feel so uncomfortable about it. So now I'm like sitting here with everything I'm saying and I'm like, no.

[Tana Mongeau]

You'Re too second guessing in your head about it. But I think it's fine. It is so weird though, how invasive they can be. Like, I had a. I had my first like horrible experience with paparazzi the, the other night. Not for me, but for a friend I was with. Obviously we've been like paparazzi. But like, no one gives a. About an influencer. She, like, I feel like she was. She's Supergirl, like in the Marvel or.

[Makoa]

One of those, you know, I don't.

[Tana Mongeau]

Know, I'm not sure. But like, obviously that picture, you know, all the superheroes are like the super people. Like, that's huge to so many people. So we walked out of the Malibu Chili cook off and I've never seen so many flashes in my life. I literally thought I was going to develop epilepsy. Okay, I can't see anything. I can't see one foot in front of me. And they're like chasing her down the street and she's just so politely like, she's just like, she's the sweetest angel ever. And when someone like, you know how they ask you to sign and then they just sell them, you know what I mean, she was like, no, I'm so sorry. And this guy goes crazy on her.

[Makoa]

He goes berserk.

[Tana Mongeau]

So crazy. Like, Christian Bale was here last night. He's a real fucking superhero. You're a fucking loser. Like, just being so horrible to her. Oh my God, I almost lost my marbles.

[Makoa]

It's like people, your marvels. You almost lost your marvel.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's why I don't think it's a marvel superhero.

[Makoa]

People just give so much. And then it's even like, just genuinely today, I was like, dude, I'm bearing my soul for you and this isn't enough.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, yeah, it's never going to. Also, that man, he's like, you're nothing. You're the scum of this earth. I'm like, you just chased her down the street.

[Makoa]

So like also just the signature sellers are so funny. Like the blue ink, you know, immediately, like, if someone hands me a blue Sharpie and print out of me, I know it's going to be on ebay tomorrow. I just joke with them. I'll sign them and be like, give me 10%.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, I will say, like, literally the day before, when I was also at the Chili Cook off, somebody had asked me to sign one of those and you taught me not to do that because it's like they just sell them.

[Makoa]

So I was like, it's like, sign one. Like, let's.

[Tana Mongeau]

Usually. I usually will, but like. So I was like, but they'll sit.

[Makoa]

There and try to get you to sign 200. And then it's like, where's my cut?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And so I'm like, no, I'm sorry. Like, I can't. And then here comes the owner of the restaurant that fired me. And all of a sudden I'm signing everything.

[Makoa]

You're like signing the guy's forehead.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm like, you want me to hold your baby?

[Makoa]

I will.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was like trying to flex on him so hard it was not even serious. But I was like, I needed him to think highly of me.

[Makoa]

Did you see the beginning of Adam Sandler's new special where the little kid was asking for his signature, but it was the same thing to sell it. And he went off on the little kid. That's how he starts his new special.

[Tana Mongeau]

I only watched it on the background.

[Brooke Schofield]

What makes a great pair of glasses at Warby Parker? It's all the invisible extras without the extra cost. Their designer quality frames start at $95, including prescription lenses, plus scratch resistant, smudge resistant and anti reflective coatings and UV protection and free Adjustments for Life. To find your next pair of glasses, sunglasses, or contact lenses, or to find the Warby Parker store nearest you, head over to warbyparker.com that's warbyparker.com if you're.

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[Makoa]

Speaking of, Adam Sandler, I. I need to tell you all about my Vegas trip. I just got back from Vegas, okay? And a lot happened in Vegas this past weekend. I think I'm buying a house there. It's a lot going on, Okay? I love Las Vegas, dude. I swear to God, like, I'll run for president over the mayor. Mayor. I'll run for mayor over there. You know, the qualifications can't be that high to be, like, the mayor of Las Vegas, right?

[Tana Mongeau]

No.

[Makoa]

And it might be me one day. I love that place. But one of the highlights of my Vegas trip this past weekend. Well, first of all, I know that you and I are going on tour. And this would be my last time in Vegas for a while. So I put my foot into it. I gave it my all. And I had a night where it was my really good friend's birthday. So I was gambling all day. I went to my friend's birthday at a club. We went to another casino with him after his birthday. To gamble. And then at 8am I went back to where I was staying. And of course, you know me, if it's 8:00am and I just had a long night in Vegas, I'm keeping it going.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Really quickly. She texted me at 8am and she says I'm up late, but I go up late. Is not 8am Okay. I was cooking a scrambled egg.

[Makoa]

It's just fucked naked. It's for a publication. It's just crazy because even the first night that me and Ty got there, we landed super late and we didn't. Like I had a beer or two and we were still somehow, I swear to God, up until like 7am gambling, like just. It just. It's dark, lose track of time. You don't see the light. They do that up for a reason. They don't show the sunlight in a casino. So you can stay up and everyone else does too. So you're like with everyone and you like think it's just way earlier than it is. I don't know. So I stumble in on this other night after my long Vegas big one. I've been out on the town gambling, clubbing for my friend's birthday for like 12 hours. And I have some chips in my pocket and a dream. And so I go to the high limit room gambling room at the casino that I'm staying at. And I walk in and I see these big ass bodyguards surrounding a person. And I'm like, how big do they.

[Tana Mongeau]

Really have to be for him?

[Makoa]

I know, and they were huge. That's the gag. So it really was like, who's this person? You know? And so I peek my little head around and it's Kevin Hart playing blackjack in Vegas at 9:00am And I'm like, this is my dream scenario, whatever. And as I'm peeking around to look at him, we make eye contact and I'm like, this. This is my moment. When. When else is this gonna happen? You know? And I walk up and the giant bodyguards, which is just. They're. They were giant.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's hilarious.

[Makoa]

Immediately try to stop me. And then Kevin's like. I'm saying Kevin like he's my homie.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wait, I just. I'm so sorry. I just had an image, you know, when your parents, not our parents, like normal parents would be like walking down the street and they like swing you in between them. That's what I just pictured Kevin doing. In between his like two bodyguards.

[Makoa]

Yeah, our parents never did that at all. But. And so I start to walk over and the bodyguards immediately stop. But Then he like, okay, it. He's like, no, come over, right? And I go to introduce myself and I'm like, hi, I'm Tana. Whatever. And he's like, I know. Like, he knew, right? And you know me, like, my vision is a little blurry. Okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's just a random short guy. Be honest.

[Makoa]

No, it was actually Kevin Hart. And he ended up giving me imagine. It really was just a random shortcut. Like, you would have to. You would have to admit me somewhere. Anyways, he was playing blackjack, and then he was sitting next to a girl, and then he was, like, asking her to. Or like, I don't know what he was doing, like, motioning to her to, like, play the hands. So, like, instead of sitting there and playing them, he was, like, turned around talking to me and having her, like, play the hands. And he just gave me, like, the best, nicest advice ever. And it was essentially just like, be authentic. Like, be yourself. Like, continue to do that. Like, you've been doing it for this long. You understand how, like, him even kind of being aware of anything of our existence was my. And maybe he was just faking it, but he was faking it really well. And it was super nice.

[Tana Mongeau]

Everything that he said to the grave, saying that Kevin Hart is a huge fan of the canceled podcast.

[Makoa]

See, that's where I'm at. So I don't know. And then imagine me like, I'm on my high horse. I start. I walk over, I start gambling like a motherfucker. Like, I have it like that. Like, I'm Jeff Bezos. I'm like, kevin Hart's my friend. Like, I'm so rich, I'm going to gamble. Fudgeing $20,000 right now. Didn't need to. Ridiculous. After meeting Kevin Hart, I realized this could mean something. What if I'm like, who says I couldn't have walked in and it wasn't Adam Sandler? Like, I. I'm not as far away as I might think.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, you're not as removed as you think you are.

[Makoa]

Like, if I'm.

[Tana Mongeau]

We're close, we're actually closer to Adam Sandler than that. And you know that we're close with one of Adam Sandler's lifelong best friends.

[Makoa]

And here's. It's just like, I feel like in Vegas, I know the type of people, like, I know that in the high limit rooms, I'm gonna walk in and see, like, Well, I don't know. I guess I was just there and saw, like, little Dicky. You really can just see random People. I was gonna say, like, mainly like athletes and like rappers and like I can't picture. And like I can never picture Adam Sandler there. But I also.

[Tana Mongeau]

He's at ihop.

[Makoa]

I also could never have pictured Kevin Hart.

[Tana Mongeau]

I could.

[Makoa]

In the Aria High limit room at 9am Maybe I'm wrong.

[Tana Mongeau]

I see Kevin Hart over Adam Sandler. Adam Sandler has no reason to gamble. He's a billionaire.

[Makoa]

And Kevin Hart is Basketball shorts. Kevin Hart is definitely just as rich.

[Tana Mongeau]

He's not just as rich. Kevin Hart is not just as rich as Adam Sandler.

[Makoa]

Are we sure?

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I'm actually not sure.

[Makoa]

I think Kevin Hart and Adam Sandler might be like equal and. Or close to equal in.

[Tana Mongeau]

I just know money and success. Like Happy Madison Productions. He's a billionaire, but doesn't Kevin Hart have a production? I think he actually might he Kevin Hart. I don't know. He's to me, like probably the funniest person alive.

[Makoa]

So. The other night I got high and I decided that I. Well, I need to tell you for context really quickly. A couple weeks ago, I had a nightmare that you and me and a bunch of our friends all went out somewhere and like got hammered, shit faced. And then. And it was like somewhere in la, like an award show almost. And we were like hammered. And in my dream, my nightmare, I met Adam Sandler, but I didn't know. Like, I. Like in my dream, I woke up the next day hungover. And I was asking you guys, like, hey, guys, what happened last night? And you all were telling me like, you met Adam Sandler. Here's the photo. But I was like hammered. And I was like, Tina. And I was like, I hate people. I love them. There was like tmz, Hollywood Fix videos of me. Like, I hate people. I love them. In Adam Sandler. This was my nightmare. No, I woke up and cried, Brooke. Like, I genuinely. Like, I didn't even know. It was a fear of mine. Like meeting Adam Sandler and either a not knowing what to say or being Tina. Right? Yeah. So I've written a script of what I would say to Adam Sandler.

[Tana Mongeau]

Why is it so long of what.

[Makoa]

I would say to Adam Sandler if I ever met him? And here's another option as well. I might be too stunned to speak if I ever meet Adam Sandler. So I could just hand him the phone.

[Tana Mongeau]

You're like, siri, like this.

[Makoa]

Yes, but a part of me thinks he might get a restraining order upon my first sentence as well. You are the epicenter of my world.

[Tana Mongeau]

I Think. Okay. Wait, can I make notes?

[Makoa]

Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

Don't fucking say that.

[Makoa]

Words cannot express how in my eyes, you truly hung the moon. You've evoked every emotion a human can fathom. Feeling all inside of my household. You changed the world. You are home for so many and rightfully so. You are America's father, brother, best friend, and loving husband. I can never thank you enough for being a safe space. Please do that weird Walt Disney frozen shit, because I wouldn't see much purpose in ever living in a world you don't. However, you will always live forever in souls worldwide. I love you. Ending line. Thank you for the greatest moment of my entire life, because I'd be meeting him.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes, of course. I think that's almost perfect. With. With the exception of the first sentence only because I feel like I might. I might have stumbled. Like, I know he's probably smarter than me, but I would be stumbling over epicenter. I'm like, what's epicenter? What does that mean?

[Makoa]

My world revolves around him. And I could totally be using the wrong word, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I think that's right. That's definitely right. But I feel like it's. It might be too strong of a hook.

[Makoa]

Okay, but other than that. Restraining order.

[Tana Mongeau]

Other than that, no notes. That was beautiful. And honestly, I hope he sees this clip because that would really probably mean a lot to him. His daughters, I'm obsessed with them, first of all. And they have that thing that I love when somebody has, like, a tiny forehead. It's my favorite thing. It's what Josie Cansecco has.

[Makoa]

Yeah, but, like, that's the central point of something.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. I think it makes sense.

[Makoa]

It says of a difficult situation. But I guess my life is in my world. You know, I think that.

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't know. I think that that could slay. You reminded me of something when you were just talking about having a bad dream. Okay. Last night I had a bad dream, and it was like. I felt like it was very. You know how I had that bad dream for a really long time that you made me, like, late.

[Makoa]

To Disney World.

[Tana Mongeau]

To Disney World. And then it actually came true.

[Makoa]

It did come true.

[Tana Mongeau]

This was a tour dream.

[Makoa]

Okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, we were, like, at some. We were at a pool party. I don't know why. We ran into my ex. I don't know why. Doesn't matter. But we, for whatever reason, were late to bus call. Okay. And by we, I mean you. We're late.

[Makoa]

Bus call is when. Like, each night on tour, when the bus is going to leave to the Next city, like after the show. It's like bus calls, 2am like you can do whatever you want. Just be on the bus by 2am before it leaves. And if you're not on it, it will leave without you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. So basically our bus call was like a certain time and like, yeah, the bus is going whether you're going or not. So Tana's not getting on the bus, but I obviously am. And in my dream they were like, this is totally fine. We're going to fix this. We're going to get you guys a second bus. Okay? So I'm like, perfect. So I go, I get on the bus, I open, I crack open the doors and it looks like something straight out of Jurassic World in there. Okay. It was like, it was like a, an abandoned, like cobwebs everywhere. Like it was. They put me on like the nasty abandoned bus and I go, I don't get to get on the real bus. I'm the one who made it to bus call. And it was like a huge scandal and I could see that really happening.

[Makoa]

I would do everything to make sure you at least have like some nice hardwood floors.

[Tana Mongeau]

It was like so crowd was like peeling. Like there were like bugs crawling out of the walls. And I was like, wow, you guys gave me this like literally like, it's so funny that trap of a bus.

[Makoa]

It's not funny. So forgive me when I just said it's so funny that. But like that it's always about you being late. Yeah. All of your nightmares like center around me being like, I'm sorry.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's okay. But I woke up mad at you this morning.

[Makoa]

Well, I'm happy we could work it out on the remix.

[Tana Mongeau]

Work it out on the remix. Oh wait, speaking of, I want to.

[Makoa]

Tell you that I also had a nightmare about tour last night.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Makoa]

And we were, we almost talked about this downstairs. Like Brooke was like, I had a nightmare about tour last night. And I was like, me too. And I was like, wait, this is. We should save this. Can I please tell you the nightmare that I had last night?

[Tana Mongeau]

Uhuh.

[Makoa]

So you and me are about to leave for the canceled podcast tour and we decide to bring Jake Shane with us. Okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

His publicist would never allow it, ever.

[Makoa]

One show maximum. But in my dream, you, me and Jake Shane go on stage to do this show that we're doing, the three of us together, right? And then, you know, we're vibing with the crowd, we're doing an advice segment. Like it all feels very real and all of a sudden the lights go down, and it's clear that two people are crashing our show. Like, they're grabbing mics from the sound guys to, like, run on stage and, like, crash our show, right? And you and me are fre out. We're trying to get off stage, but the crowd in my dream is, like, centered or, like, we couldn't get off. Like, it would have. We would have had to, like, crowd surf out of it. And then the lights come back on and the two people. Our mics are cut off, by the way. You and I are, like, trying to talk into our mics and be like, help. Like, hello? Like, what's going on? Matt Rife and Jake Paul. And then we have to sit there, trapped on this stage while Matt Rife and Jake Paul do a set about us. And we would speak that up. I know it'd be, like, a better show. Honestly.

[Tana Mongeau]

Honestly, I would pace so many dollars. Not that I think Matt Rife would literally ever even talk about me, but, like, I would do anything to just hear him, like, talk shit about me to his friends. Like, I want to know. You know what I mean? Like, I want to know what he's, like, saying in response to, like, all the shit that I pulled because, like, what was I doing? Like, I was kind of getting crazy with it for a second there, but, like, you know what I mean? He'd be hilarious about it, to be honest.

[Makoa]

To be a fly on the wall in a room of a lot of people.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know? If you could hear anybody, like, what anybody has to say about you, who would you choose?

[Makoa]

Besides, I was gonna say Pete Davidson. After all that Mukuru? That's what you're gonna say? Delete. Immediate apology. No. No, Tana. No. Actually, no. Oh, my God. Kylie Jenner.

[Tana Mongeau]

You think I don't know.

[Makoa]

I'm trying. I would want just someone, like, I.

[Tana Mongeau]

Would have, like, random people, like, who probably have never seen me before in their life. Like, who I think, like, I've convinced myself hate me. I'm like, Billie Eilish hates me. I can just tell Kris Jenner hates me. I don't know why. Like, she's never seen my face before, but I can tell she hates me.

[Makoa]

That actually happened to me at poker this weekend. Blac Chyna was playing a table over.

[Tana Mongeau]

She's doing so well.

[Makoa]

And I, like, sober. I convinced myself that you and I, like, had a story about her on the canceled podcast.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, you can never be too sure.

[Makoa]

Yeah. And then I didn't know. Whatever. So the whole time I was like, oh, my God. Like, I hope she likes me. Like, I want to rewrite history. Like, I love her. Like, I. I want to be friends, whatever. And I, like, walk past her table, and she, like, waves and says I look pretty. And I was like, wait, I literally made all that up. But I. That's my. I. Like, the thing with this podcast is just, like, the amount of stories told and things said. Like, you just never know who was okay with it and who wasn't or who we've talked about, actually, literally at all.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And sometimes you say something that you think is just, like, a casual story, but then it's like, they're probably like, bitch.

[Makoa]

Yeah. Like, Kevin Hart's gonna send me a cease and desist. Yeah, please don't. Kevin. I had a really good time with you.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love you, Kev. I saw Bobby Lee the other night. He was with a girl who's, like 6 foot 2 or something.

[Makoa]

And I was like, wow, he's single? Or like, he's, like, dating? He doesn't have wife?

[Tana Mongeau]

I think so. No, he has a ex wife, I think.

[Makoa]

Oh, right. Didn't he do that, like, jubilee ass button shit with her?

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm not sure.

[Makoa]

Love Bobby Lee.

[Tana Mongeau]

Mm.

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[Tana Mongeau]

Who else is at the Balaboo Chicken or chili cook Off? You should have come.

[Makoa]

It's so funny because you and I were both at something like. Like, I'm at a Vegas poker tournament with, like, everyone in my realm, and you're like, a Malibu chili cook off with everyone in your realm. And it's like, just. We were both doing the most, like, on brand for our weekend.

[Tana Mongeau]

The fact that I went to the chili Cook off, not once, but twice, I've never been.

[Makoa]

I would love to, simply because I love chili. I think chili is just so.

[Tana Mongeau]

I am not kidding. I didn't. I don't even think chili was in the room with us. There was.

[Makoa]

You didn't have any chili?

[Tana Mongeau]

Pictured it being like. Like, euphoria where there was, like, a chili competition.

[Makoa]

Yeah. And they go, like, they don't have chili at the Malibu Chili Cook Off.

[Tana Mongeau]

I didn't see, I guess, any chili.

[Makoa]

Anyone going to an event in Malibu isn't really eating.

[Tana Mongeau]

No. And, like, the little Kid I ran into my manager's kids, like, full head to toe, chrome hearts.

[Makoa]

I'm like, no chili inside. No cheese, no dogs, no sour cream, no onions.

[Tana Mongeau]

I did see a corn dog.

[Makoa]

Well, that makes me feel better. I thought I was missing a lot of chili. And that's where I would have wanted to be.

[Tana Mongeau]

No.

[Makoa]

Except for that I was at night, I was like.

[Tana Mongeau]

I literally starred myself the whole day. I was like, I'm gonna have so much chili tonight. And everyone I was with was like, do you know where we're going?

[Makoa]

So no chilies cooked off. That's the most la ass. Like, the Malibu chili cook off being, like, something that people go to just to, like, see people and, like, be a big party. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's like a billion dollars to get in, too. I'm like, and there's no chili and no chili. And then to go on the rides. It's like $20 per ride or, like, per carnival game.

[Makoa]

I'm like, all I would have wanted is some good seasoned beans. I saw Jose Canseco. He gave me all of the lore on my seeing my father.

[Tana Mongeau]

How was it?

[Makoa]

It was brutal. He. Oh, I don't. It's. I'll save that one for the book. But we love you, Jose, so very much. That's it. Rooting for Jose forever. Literally. You're the best.

[Tana Mongeau]

I would like to introduce a new segment.

[Makoa]

Okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

That I've created.

[Makoa]

Okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's called all of the things that I like this week that you need to like as well.

[Makoa]

Oh, my God. We could go back and forth.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think we should, because I think we need more positivity on the canceled podcast due to popular request. And I want to spread some positivity and tell you some things I really loved this week, starting with the new docu series Chimp Crazy on Netflix.

[Makoa]

Have you seen it?

[Tana Mongeau]

It's Tiger King. But chimps is Joe Exotic. No, it's the same guy who made Tiger King. But it's exact, like, same level of crazy, like, in these women. And they are so fabulous. Like, huge blonde hair, like, lips this big. Like, they're just like us. And it's crazy. It's just fascinating because, like, you can just. But you.

[Makoa]

Where do the chimps come into play? Are they just, like, sharing a banana?

[Tana Mongeau]

No, they were chimp owners. Like, like, the same way Joe Exotic had big cats, which I also have to get to because I currently have a big cat. They had chimps. And, like, it was crazy because, like, not even that long ago, you could buy a chimp for like 30k. A chimpanzee. You know how long they live? As long as a human being. Okay.

[Makoa]

How fun.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, until they rip your face off into smithereen. Imagine she's just like, oh, how cute. But look how big they get. And they can't even go near them. And they're so much stronger than humans. There was a cop that said, well, I don't want to spoil it for anybody, but a chimpanzee can pull the door off of a car in one swipe. Okay. And he can also rip your face off, which apparently they do. But you have to watch it. It's so fascinating. But I would say wait until Sunday because that is when the next episode comes out.

[Makoa]

Are people getting their faces ripped off?

[Tana Mongeau]

You'll have to tune in on a Sunday and see.

[Makoa]

You know me, I just be like, okay, now give me the Kylie Jenner pack.

[Tana Mongeau]

But it's so fascinating. Like all the drama and like the law breaking and stuff, it's just, it's so good. It's the same guy who made Tiger King. So it's the same.

[Makoa]

I never watched Tiger King.

[Tana Mongeau]

You were literally Carole Baskin for Halloween. But I'm living. So I watched Tiger King and I was like, this is my dream job. Obviously, like, you know, you watch like Steve Irwin and stuff, wrestle a crocodile and you're like, I could do that. Maybe you might not want to do that. But I did. And I'm like, I'm going to be a big cat person.

[Makoa]

But you're just going to say, I'm going to be a big cat and you've like fully lost it. I was like, new meds. Try again.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, but my meds are working. I can't wait to tell you about it. I have a big cat in my house. And by that I mean I have a five pound Bengal who's going to be upwards of 20 pounds. I mean, he's probably not going to be because he's the run, but he, he owns my apartment now. I don't live there. He is so ravenous and so raven.

[Makoa]

You showed me a video yesterday of him on some like devious trying to like swing from the ceiling and swipe your in and out. And I honestly was like.

[Tana Mongeau]

And he growls like so aggressively. It's so crazy.

[Makoa]

But they don't bite, right?

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, they bite. Are you kidding? Have you seen my arms? I'm sliced to smithereens. I look like ceviche. But he's playing.

[Makoa]

Does he just think you're also a cat?

[Tana Mongeau]

No.

[Makoa]

If I was him. That's what I think.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'd be like, he doesn't know his strength, and he doesn't know he's hurting me. And I cut his nails, like, every day. But he's literally Jack. Jack from the Incredibles. Like, he's so powerful, and, like, I'm not kidding. I could cut his nail and it would just grow right back. Like, in that moment. It's like. It's actually terrifying. And I knew, like, having a bangle was going to be, like, more responsibility than a regular cat, but, like, I just didn't realize how powerful he was going to be. But I've also never had a kitten.

[Makoa]

I feel like that's what macoa feels like having me.

[Tana Mongeau]

You think so?

[Makoa]

Like, just.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, but you're pretty docile.

[Makoa]

It's true.

[Tana Mongeau]

You don't bite.

[Makoa]

I bite. Oh, But I've never bit you. Have I ever bit you?

[Tana Mongeau]

You've bitten me. Yeah. And I had to get a tetanus shot.

[Makoa]

Okay, I want to go.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Makoa]

Inside out, too.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, I have to see it.

[Makoa]

You haven't seen Inside out too?

[Tana Mongeau]

No.

[Makoa]

Brooke, you're gonna. Well, you've seen Inside out one.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes, yes.

[Makoa]

I. I am going to venture to. It's a Disney movie, correct? It's Pixar. Right? But it's a Disney movie. It is my favorite Disney movie ever created.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's such a cute concept.

[Makoa]

It is. And it's so. The second one goes so much more introspective on all of the emotions. They add more emotions. The emotions have emotions. Like, it's. It's very crazy, but it is really why I wish you'd seen the second one so we could, like, really talk about this. But it's wild to me that it is kind of marketed for kids. Like, a slight spoiler alert. One of the new emotions is anxiety. And watching anxiety, like, create a million horrible scenarios for, like, this, like, it just. I was watching this video the other day. With it was Bretman Rock and his little nephew.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think it's his nephew.

[Makoa]

And his nephew, like, saw something blue and was like, oh, it's blue. Like, sadness. Like, it's like. But that made me, like, existentially weirdly sad. Because should kids know the complexity of emotions like that? Or is the point of innocence of childhood not knowing the complexity of emotions and not associating them with just, like, simply a color as if they're something to be, like, animated and, like, do you know what I mean? Like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, I honestly, like, you could look at it that way, but you could also see I'm experiencing fear. What color is that?

[Makoa]

I don't know. I don't think fear is an emotion. Maybe purple.

[Tana Mongeau]

I also think it's a positive because I think a lot of kids, like, either can't talk about their emotions or don't talk about their emotions because they, like, can't understand them. For example, I had anxiety as a child, and I didn't know the word. Like, I didn't know what anxiety was. So I. I ran around saying I was guilty. I feel so guilty. I feel so guilty.

[Makoa]

And so you're saying that would have maybe helped you to understand, like, if.

[Tana Mongeau]

I knew that anxiety existed, I would have been, like, settled. At least in knowing that I'm not. I didn't do something wrong because I always felt like I did something wrong and I didn't. Couldn't figure out what it was.

[Makoa]

That's fair. That is fair. Yeah. I guess I was like sadness and anger as a child, but I think I knew that.

[Tana Mongeau]

What do you think your top two are? Your top two emotions?

[Makoa]

I think I literally, like, out of inside out, you mean? Yeah, I'm literally sadness, like, to the.

[Tana Mongeau]

T. No, I don't think you're sadness. And if you are sadness and you need to get on antidepressants because you always tell me you're not depressed, but, like, not even that medication pusher, but.

[Makoa]

Like, how she doesn't want to walk.

[Tana Mongeau]

She's like, oh, no, you're late. Is laziness in there?

[Makoa]

Sadness exemplifies a lot of lazy traits.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Makoa]

And then I think I'm like, joy. Okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think I'm joy, too, but I'm also like, shame. Is there shame?

[Makoa]

You're also angry. Anger.

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't know.

[Makoa]

It's like you and your man.

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't have anger anymore because my meds are working.

[Makoa]

Thank God.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm serious. That's why I didn't hit that paparazzi, because I would have. He deserved it. Loser.

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[Tana Mongeau]

I can't believe you haven't said anything about my blood. My new blush routine.

[Makoa]

I was just going to say that about my bleaching tone.

[Tana Mongeau]

I will. I did say something about it. You just weren't paying attention to me. I said it right when I walked in the door.

[Makoa]

Well, you didn't hear me respond back and say, God, I love your blush routine.

[Tana Mongeau]

I want everybody here to know that my new blush routine also on my it's of the week is the Sabrina Carpenter full shiny blush. It's back. Okay. It was never out for her, but it was out for me.

[Makoa]

And my favorite.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know I'm gonna get comments that are like, brooke looks like a clown.

[Makoa]

But I love shine. It's. I've been loving shiny blush when I.

[Tana Mongeau]

Need more things that you love. I'm loving our new segment smoking weed. Oh.

[Makoa]

Like, no, but, like, can I tell you something? I didn't even think about this till right now, but it is on my new list of loves. First of all, when I was in Europe, I didn't bring. I know a lot of people who, when they travel, like, overseas, they will.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, smuggle drugs through their butthole or.

[Makoa]

Smuggle wax pens and weed pens and stuff like that. But I just don't want to play. I don't. Like, that's when I become anxiety from inside out, okay? Like, I can't have a weed pen in my shit and go through customs. I will lose it. Okay? And so I didn't bring any marijuana to Europe. And so I had, like, a complete break from marijuana for, like, the longest time in a while. First of all, I come home and unpack my suitcase, and I put on a pair of sweats from my suitcase, bedbugs and all that. I didn't wear it all in Europe. And I put my hand in the pocket, and there was a weed pen in it the entire time. So all of that for literally nothing. I did smuggle it and didn't know, but.

[Tana Mongeau]

But you were probably settled knowing that. Yes. Wait, don't kill me. It's to just wipe your arm like that. Just. There are. So. I wish everyone can see it. We literally look like we're like a light post outside of the county fair right now. There's so many bugs flying around.

[Makoa]

And that's how I hope you know I love you and you canceled listeners, that I love you guys. Because in any other realm, I would be gone. I was gonna say gone, like Donkey Kong, but that's literally not the phrase. Anyways, so the wax pens that I do smoke, they always. Wait, there was one in my pants, so I could have been smoking it the entire time. I just didn't know until I got home. I get home, I'm smoking my wax pen again. I try to order another one it is not on delivery apps anywhere. Natalie and I order through the same delivery service, and she told me that the wax pens I've been smoking for the last year. And mind you, this is like, a public company that sells wax pens. Like, it's like a brand that sells wax pens. All of the weed pens were recalled for pesticides in them. I. Ironically, with our bug lore right now, I've been smoking pesticides.

[Tana Mongeau]

We probably have so many pesticides in a day. Think about that.

[Makoa]

But, like, into my lungs, into my.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, you could. We consume them, right? They're all, like, vegetables and shit.

[Makoa]

Oh, I guess that's true. But, like, weed X rayed.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, you don't want it in your windpipe.

[Makoa]

So I've been loving smoking. I smoked a backwood last night. I've been loving smoking the actual plant again instead of. Because I always say that on these wax pens, I feel like I'm smoking. Smoking a Tetris piece. Like. Like, you know the game Tetris? I feel like I'm, like, hitting one a tetrimino. Like, the high is so robotic and weird. And now I think it's. I know that because they've been smoking pesticides, which I might actually need.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, enough. I'm huffing. What else is going on in your life?

[Makoa]

Well, I. More so there's some interesting shit happening in pop culture.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, okay.

[Makoa]

I think we just have to start with my favorite of the day. I saw you posted on your story, so I know you're ready to talk about this one.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, hell yeah.

[Makoa]

Anna Delvey on Dancing with the Stars.

[Tana Mongeau]

First of all, so jealous. Everybody knows how badly I want that.

[Makoa]

That is.

[Tana Mongeau]

Second of all, them just leaving in her ankle monitor is, like, the funniest thing of all time.

[Makoa]

Dancing with the stars with an ankle monitor.

[Tana Mongeau]

How do you get that approved by your, like, parol officer? You're like, wait, can I do this funny thing?

[Makoa]

It's just a telltale story of time that, like, the p. Like, according to most people, she's the villain in her story.

[Tana Mongeau]

I mean, like, some would call her a master manipulator, thief, criminal. I wouldn't, but some would.

[Makoa]

So for her to be on, I'm just. I feel like five years ago, or even, for example, eight years ago, Dancing with the Stars would have never had Lindsay Lohan with her ankle monitor on. Like, do you think the times are just changing and these major traditional public things are having with the times? That's what I'm. But I'm saying at the time, Lindsay Lohan with her ankle monitor would have been views, but like, it just. It wasn't the time.

[Tana Mongeau]

Just like we started like kind of. What do you. What's the word? Like sensationalized. No.

[Makoa]

Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

We're laughing. We're laughing that Anna Delvey has a fucking income monitor. And I'm tuning in because of it. So it's like whatever reason I'm watching doesn't matter so long as I'm watching.

[Makoa]

That's true.

[Tana Mongeau]

And I don't think it's. I think a lot of it's a streaming service now, so that's different. There's different rules on a streaming service than there are on traditional television.

[Makoa]

Oh, you're. That's like has to 100% be it. Because even right now, can you see Gypsy Rose being on Dancing with the Stars? Whereas like five years ago that was never happening.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was shocked to find out that she's not on it.

[Makoa]

Mm. Her and Ken and Ryan are in like a three way salsa with the baby.

[Tana Mongeau]

Do you think she would. I was going to say slay.

[Makoa]

I've had a really big problem with saying Gypsy Rose slays, so I'm no stranger to that. I told her to her face.

[Tana Mongeau]

She was like, from it? Yeah. Okay. You're killing it.

[Makoa]

Yes. Mother work.

[Tana Mongeau]

This is teetering the line.

[Makoa]

When are we anyway, who else?

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm trying to think of who else is on it. Joey from the Bachelor.

[Makoa]

I am tuning in for Anna motherfucking Delby. That's all.

[Tana Mongeau]

I. I want to be on it so bad. I think that I've been. I've been dancing again just in case they ever ask me. So I just want everyone to know.

[Makoa]

I would do anything in the world for you to be on it. I will be in your Brooks friend seat. I need that like this.

[Tana Mongeau]

I need to flex on some people at home.

[Makoa]

My grandma. That's why. Yeah, like, that is why, like, it's so. The older generation loves Dancing with the Stars.

[Tana Mongeau]

My grandma literally live for it.

[Makoa]

It's my biggest fear.

[Tana Mongeau]

What else? Sabrina Carpenter's album came out.

[Makoa]

We talked about a little on the Patreon last week about.

[Tana Mongeau]

Right.

[Makoa]

The Sabrina Camila lore, you know? You know, my Sabrina and Camila of.

[Tana Mongeau]

The week are redhead and Halle.

[Makoa]

No. Oh, we talked about that.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know. But I was thinking we should probably touch again now that everybody's moved to Sophia's side.

[Makoa]

It's the telltale story of like the villain villains it out and still villains it out enough until people side with them. Same thing with like literally anecdotally but.

[Tana Mongeau]

What happened with Sophia is she held onto the actual receipts for so long, which could never be me. I would have jumped on that, like, first opportunity. But she literally sat on those. That for a year. She sat on the fact that he asked her on the date before she ever even attended the event. She sat on that. And he knew. And he let his girlfriend go on that whole tangent. He's the villain here, by the way. But he was letting. He was letting Halle go online and say all this, knowing damn well that he had already asked the redhead on a date before they ever even ran into each other. She. Never letting her embarrass herself.

[Makoa]

And she said. She just said, sorry, he wasn't wearing a collar. I don't know why I always make her British dude.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, but she. I mean, she. Her delivery is questionable. I think that she's, like, definitely probably still a mean girl. But, like, I get, like, she's likable.

[Makoa]

Do you know that I. I DM'd her, obviously, asking her to be.

[Tana Mongeau]

I followed her for sure.

[Makoa]

I DM'd her asking her to be on Canceled. Because I'm like, she's saying all this online, like, you know, like. And she's theoretically canceled. So come on. Canceled? Why not? And what's her name?

[Tana Mongeau]

Sophia lacourt.

[Makoa]

I was literally typing in a completely different name.

[Tana Mongeau]

Sounds like you're really.

[Makoa]

I said, okay, I'm gonna ask. Canceled pod. Only if you want to, but obviously kind of hilarious. She said, oh, my goodness. You totally don't remember, but I've met you a bunch of times. You were so nice to me. I think you're amazing. I met your bodyguard at Coachella. Yada, yada, yada. I adore you. Appreciate you guys reaching out, but I have New York Fashion Week, essentially, she. And she ends it with. And by the time I fly to la, someone else will get canceled and everyone will be bored. The whole thing is silly anyways. Like, she said, no. By the time I'd be on the couch, someone else will be canceled.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's respectable. Because it's like, she's not just trying to milk it dry. She's like, get over it.

[Makoa]

That is true. I wasn't expecting that. I wasn't expecting that response. I was like, okay. Interesting.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Because I think a lot of people are kind of accusing her of being, like, a drama. But, like, Bethany Frankel made a good. Like, she made a good little think piece where she was like, listen, if you're the one to bring something online, then you can't control how it pans out. And right now she's not the villain anymore.

[Makoa]

I said this on the Patreon, so I will keep it to like literal two sentences. But like it's just so wild to me how the guy is not clearly the villain.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, he is the villain. I just want to come to that consensus and I don know how we have it.

[Makoa]

Where are the million tiktoks with multi millions of views that aren't just pitting these women together? What about, hey, he's a.

[Tana Mongeau]

What a fucking loser that guy is. But I.

[Makoa]

What if they like the smell?

[Tana Mongeau]

No shade to Halle, because I have gotten back with exes who have done me way worse.

[Makoa]

Oh, 100%, duh. And she's.

[Tana Mongeau]

And she's saying she made it in the Hamptons. Like, are you kidding?

[Makoa]

She made a TikTok the other day where she was donating all of her creator fund to teachers. And yeah, and I, I just. She's definitely handling this with so much class. But it is a story as old as time where people end up loving the villain. So we'll see how that goes. And I think more people should definitely hold that man accountable. My redhead and blonde situation of the week.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Makoa]

Is Alex Warren and Thomas Petru.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, Lay it on me. I don't know anything about this lore.

[Makoa]

Well, so Thomas Petru started the Hype House. Of course, I have known him forever. He used to film videos and edit for Jake Paul. And I think that he kind of probably spent a lot of time in that Team 10 world and that was kind of what incited him to start his own content house. In my opinion, the Hype House is ending was very messy. I feel like it wasn't one big. And this is just my opinion, but it wasn't one big group separation at once. It was like Daisy Keech left, then like Little Huddy left, then the D'Amelio's left, then Addison left, then. And then it ended up just being like him and Alex Warren and his girlfriend Mia. But then they were taking on new people like Vinn Hacker and Jack Wright. But then they left and then new people. Then everyone was kind of like, dude, we like this.

[Tana Mongeau]

I can't believe that was like a real thing that happened.

[Makoa]

It's so crazy to think about all of the OG people in one house now. You know, like daisy huge, Charlie D'Amelio, Addison Rae, Dixie Taylor Holder, Bryce hall and whoever else all under one roof. Like renegading. Right? But that was the time. And then eventually I think he tried for Like, a third round of it. But it. Everyone was like, we liked this for the OG People. Like, Like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, lay it. Lay it to rest.

[Makoa]

Yeah. Take it out back and shoot it. Right. Alex Warren made a song about Hype House.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. But it sounds like it's. Honestly, he did a really good job of making it, like, really universally. Yeah, like.

[Makoa]

Like, the house was burning down. I had to get out. It could be about a friendship or a relationship.

[Tana Mongeau]

Sounds like a metaphor. But, like, really, like, the house. The hype house was burning.

[Makoa]

I'm really excited for it, and I want to have Alex on, honestly, to, like, tell us everything.

[Tana Mongeau]

We should. Should we have him sing us a little song?

[Makoa]

I know, because he is, like. And obviously we've talked so much about how much we love Alex Warren because he went through a lot of the actual hardships that other singers may or may not have faked. And he is a very strong person. Him and Covers Lore is beautiful. They're a beautiful couple. Oh, my God. We could ask them so much.

[Tana Mongeau]

We could, and it would just be interesting. And he, like, got shot, and, like, I'm pretty sure, like, the bullet's still in his body or something.

[Makoa]

We should have him on, like, before we leave. That would just be a good episode to have, like, in the bank. And I know you do it. I love Alex.

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[Tana Mongeau]

I like when you do a little, like, grin before you say something.

[Makoa]

No, because I don't think I can say this out loud. Oh, this was in the very beginning of the episode. I was telling you, like, about that interviewer asking, like, how I feel talking about sex. And it's because I was about to say something, like, wildly sexual, and I just. I don't know. Ty was. I don't know how this came up. Ty and I were talking about, like, can I ask you a question? You answer it first.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, I mean, it would depend on the question, as it usually dies.

[Makoa]

Can you tell me, like, a phrase that you would say to a guy during sex? No. Please.

[Tana Mongeau]

I can't.

[Makoa]

Please?

[Tana Mongeau]

No. I would, like, literally, no.

[Makoa]

Well, then I can't say anything.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, I don't know. I'm not like, a big, like. I'm not using a lot of, like, catchphrases. To be honest.

[Makoa]

What if these are all of my bedbugs?

[Tana Mongeau]

They're not.

[Makoa]

Okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Makoa]

Sorry.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I'm not, like, big on catchphrases. It's more just like, good job.

[Makoa]

But there's no way you're like, great work, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I do. Sometimes I high five them.

[Makoa]

So do you take your, like, funny quirkiness? Like, you don't get, like.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I try not to be. I try not to be funny in. In sexual relations at all because that just really kills the vibes. Like, I would tell someone, you say, you know what you say. I know what to say. You know what I say, probably, but I'm not. I'm not there. This. I'm. I'm learning a lot about digital footprint.

[Makoa]

Okay, then, you know, and I don't even. I can't even actually have any of this out there.

[Tana Mongeau]

And I'm realizing, say it, say it, and then I'll say, give you one. You tell me, and then I'll give you.

[Makoa]

No, I told Ty a phrase that I. I may sometimes say in bed, and I'm not even going to say the phrase on podcast.

[Tana Mongeau]

What does spit on me and choke me and kill me?

[Makoa]

Like, yes. But, like, honestly, just. I'm not saying, like, I will bleep it before I leave this on the Internet, but Ty was, like, really saying that that's abnormal. But I was telling him, like, obviously over the years, I feel like I found out that it, like, works, but I.

[Tana Mongeau]

But it's tough. Like, okay, wait, I'm, like, afraid because of, like, what's going on. You just tell me, like, this.

[Makoa]

Don't say it. Don't say it.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, you can't say it on the box. I'm not kink shaming you.

[Makoa]

It's not even my kink. Yeah, like, you're. I don't know, like, I couldn't. I couldn't get there to say what I would say.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wait, I don't know if I know what you said right. Wait, can you say it again? Can you say it again? Are you saying. Or.

[Makoa]

They're honestly interchangeable.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm not kink shaming you.

[Makoa]

It's not my kink, though. You know, I'm just saying, like, it works. There's a bug on your shoulder, your rough shoulder. That was so calm and graceful.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I mean, you know, whatever gets the job done. But you know how you, like, do you ever.

[Makoa]

But I just want to know, like, what a good Brooke Schofield in red phrases. And I told you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, you're gonna have to find out when this hacker drops my tape because, yeah, I'm not like, I don't know, like, it depends on the guy. But have you ever, like, used something on a guy that, like, you might have used in the past and it, like, just didn't hit the same. He's like, wait, what the.

[Makoa]

He, like, hit me?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, that's kind of a good. A good example of that. Some guys are just like, more chill and like, you can't really pull out all the big stops.

[Makoa]

I think I've learned over time that a lot of the big stops I may have pulled at a young age.

[Tana Mongeau]

You definitely, like, get. You build up to that. So you. I think that.

[Makoa]

But I've, like, built down almost like.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm like, yeah, well, you have to because, like, you can't just pick up where you left off with some new guy because he's like, wait, why are.

[Makoa]

You, you know, swinging from all fours?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, why are you calling me Ronald Reagan? Like, you know, I knew I was.

[Makoa]

Going to make a chimp crazy joke, but it would just felt wrong.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, but do you ever. This is a good question I like to ask people. And by that I mean it's like the stupidest question ever. Do you ever wake up and you feel so grateful that you were born a human and not one of those little gnats?

[Makoa]

No. If anything, sometimes I'm like, oh, my God. A gnat has never had to, like, buy more likes on Hinge, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, like, yeah, but what are their likes?

[Makoa]

Has never, like, signed up for, like, well, those better help at 8am coming down off of Molly.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay. I mean, yeah, like, I see your point for sure.

[Makoa]

And that has never done anal without lube.

[Tana Mongeau]

Are you doing anal without lube?

[Makoa]

I know, but I have.

[Tana Mongeau]

Why this?

[Makoa]

Just because it was like, in the moment, like, okay, I'm so sorry.

[Tana Mongeau]

Anal any day now, Brooke.

[Makoa]

Today we were writing our chauffeur tour and she's like, well, what if I told my first time doing anal story? And I'm like, what? You did anal? Like, perfect. What is it? And she goes, no, I can do anal tonight. Like, willing to do anal for the show is so ridiculous. I don't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

I keep promising the people and it's just, you know what you're going to do?

[Makoa]

Analyze.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

What are you so afraid of? What are you waiting for?

[Tana Mongeau]

I think I'm waiting for. I'm waiting for a micro to come along.

[Makoa]

Oh, that makes perfect sense. It's just like, backwards. But, like, you Somehow. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

I've never anything the size of a penis.

[Makoa]

Really?

[Tana Mongeau]

Are you?

[Makoa]

That's what your shits look like sometimes.

[Tana Mongeau]

What's your biggest, you think?

[Makoa]

Definitely. Much bigger than some dicks.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was really. Oh. Oh my God. Have you seen that person who took a photo of their turd? Like they had a really big turd and so they took a photo of it and then they like sent it in their work group chat and they were like, who's turd of it? Wait, I'm. I'm butchering this story. Never mind.

[Makoa]

I feel like you're also just talking about something that's happened in our group chat and arguably maybe from me. No. One thing I will never do, I can honest to God say, like, since 1998, I've never one time, even for myself, taken one singular photo of my shit. I think that is so fucking weird. I think it's so weird that guys do that. You've definitely done that. I know you have. Aaron, you don't even have to answer me. I think. Have you?

[Tana Mongeau]

No. No, I don't think so. I don't imagine I had much use for any of those.

[Makoa]

And maybe I just like attract really peculiar friends and people in my life, but I feel like I'm always having a friend take and. Or show me a photo of their shit.

[Tana Mongeau]

I.

[Makoa]

And I'm really against that.

[Tana Mongeau]

That should be a way to weed someone out of your life. That should be an immediate I. We are not friends anymore. You just showed me your turds.

[Makoa]

But it's like a lot of people we know and love. Like your friends.

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't know.

[Makoa]

And love takers. Photo takers.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's so crazy. You say that because there was someone in my high school called the poop trader and they were going in and smearing their poop on the wall. It was middle school, actually. But still to this day, the poop a trader has not come forward.

[Makoa]

No notes. I have no notes on that. I tried to get there too. I was like, think of smearing. Thought of like. Yeah, no, I.

[Tana Mongeau]

My pants recently.

[Makoa]

Really?

[Tana Mongeau]

And so did my friend.

[Makoa]

Did you just add. And so did my friend. So that it was.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, but she told me and I was like, that's so crazy. You say that because I my pants recently too. And honestly, it was your fault.

[Makoa]

So saying that it's my fault that you. Your pants is the most you was ever. Literally the most you ever.

[Tana Mongeau]

It was your fault that I myself.

[Makoa]

Why?

[Tana Mongeau]

Because you made it so that I.

[Makoa]

Couldn'T make your restroom our photo Shoot. Was in the middle of nowhere. Brooke was having a bit of a tummy trouble somehow. It is my fault that she sh. And, you know, I can spend some time doing the math on that later. I'll get back to you.

[Tana Mongeau]

It happens to the best of us. And we are not saying anymore because I have a crush.

[Makoa]

You know what I was thinking about the other day? Homophobia. I just got high as fuck, and for some reason, I was thinking about homophobia. Like, think about, like, arachnophobia. Like, what do you mean? Gay people scare you? Like, like, are you scared of a good outfit? Like, the fact that there are, like, real people out there that, like, are like, oh, gay people.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, that is. It is really scary.

[Makoa]

And maybe this is just a dumb topic. I can stop talking.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know it's not a dumb topic, but it's like, yeah, it's definitely not a. I don't think you could classify it as a phobia. It's a distaste. People have a distaste for gay people, which, if you are one of those people. Well, you know what I want to say. Yeah, you should die, I guess.

[Makoa]

Yeah, I'm making jokes right now, but I. It just, like, really blows my mind. Like, there are people out there.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wait, I was just. Yeah, I was just watching, for some reason, a clip. Clip of Ellen DeGeneres on Howard Stern talking about TR or Caitlyn Jenner. You know, Caitlyn Jenner doesn't believe in gay marriage.

[Makoa]

I'm like, wait, even just not believing in gay man. Like, why? Where the fuck does it concern you?

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, it's just like, accept me as I am, but I do not accept you as you are. Like, in what world?

[Makoa]

That is so interesting.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I don't. With her.

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[Makoa]

I got asked a couple months ago to promote this, like, crypto coin, and obviously that is just for 2019. Like in 2020, maybe, you know, Titcoin, all of it. Bitcoin, if you will.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

I was like, no. And they were like, no. You have to, like, this is the coin of the year. Like, we'll pay you whatever you want. Like, we'll give for a tweet. Like, just say you love this coin, whatever. And I'm, like, ghosting the people. And then do you know what they sent me trying to pitch me to, like, be able to do, like, promote this coin and accept the money? Was Caitlyn Jenner doing, like, Instagram videos for them? Like, I love Boeing coin, and I this. And they were like, Caitlin. Like, that was just. Yeah, it was very strange because they weren't released yet. It's not like it was like Caitlin's story screen recorded. It was like they were about to go out in, like, a week. And the brand is sending me this, like, exclusive content of Caitlyn Jenner backing like, like, boink Coin.

[Tana Mongeau]

That is actually being like, this is.

[Makoa]

Why you should do it too. And I was like, I just don't. I can't.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

Do you know right now? What if in a hypothetical world, something really hypothetical just happened to me?

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, I'm following.

[Makoa]

I hypothetically was just offered a lot of money to endorse a political party. Like, millions. Like, I was just offered to endorse a political party, hypothetically.

[Tana Mongeau]

Is it the one you identify with?

[Makoa]

No. And then I was being allegedly told an alleged list of other influencers that have already hypothetically accepted money to do those hypothetical things that were hypothetically offered to me to hypothetically do.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think we can hypothetically assume who those people are.

[Makoa]

But it's not one or two.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, yeah, it's 12.

[Makoa]

No, it's like. It's like 100 of them. It's allegedly like, both political parties. That's the thing.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I think that Charlie XCX got behind Kamala on purpose, and then everybody just decided it was Brat Summer.

[Makoa]

I fear we're having two different conversations. I'm gonna agree with all of that. I think Charlie XX just did that. And I think that we are all agreeing that that's Brat Summer.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

One of my best friends went on a hinge date a couple nights ago, right?

[Tana Mongeau]

A girl.

[Makoa]

And she was texting me while she was on the date. And this was a first hinge date, right? And they had been talking on FaceTime. And he was a very, like, holistic health guy, and he lives here in la and he runs like a. This is all alleged. This is just what he was telling her, like, they were probably FaceTiming for a week and then they went on a date, right. And he was telling her like, I'm a holistic health guy. I run this holistic health company here in Los Angeles where I give people and I quote, blue scorpion venom. Okay, I didn't. No blue. I don't. I. That sounds like an inside out character almost.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. I don't even know if there's colors.

[Makoa]

If like are there. I don't know if they're blue scorpions. Right. But apparently it can like cure cancer and it has all these anti aging benefits according to this man. And then I did google it today and like just see, like, are there benefits to ingesting scorpion venom? And apparently there are like cancer, like, I don't know. And so she goes on a date with this guy and he's telling her all about his scorpion venom and everything and how he takes it and whatever. And they go back to his place in North Hollywood, by the way. And I just feel like anyone who was curing cancer with scorpion venom might live in not North Hollywood. Watch it.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was there today.

[Makoa]

What?

[Tana Mongeau]

You better watch out. I was there today.

[Makoa]

I like North Hollywood. It just doesn't give me cancer curing suburb. Maybe I'm maybe Brentwood. I don't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

And so they're back at his house and they probably each had like three or four drinks and he was like, essentially like, you have to try the scorpion venom. And she was like, are you sure? About to get roofied, blah, blah, blah. Right. And so he gives her a dropper of this alleged scorpion venom. And then I don't know, she. She went to sleep there like almost immediately and then woke up and went to her house and was like projectile vomiting all day. So I'm like this man. In my opinion, I formed the opinion that this was a really, really creative way, like creative writing prompt. Like get to 500 characters to roofie someone.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Like to roof you, like with consent.

[Makoa]

That's what I think. Right?

[Tana Mongeau]

I mean, yeah, but like, but then.

[Makoa]

She was kind of saying like, I don't know, like I didn't really feel roofied. But then I projectiled the next day.

[Tana Mongeau]

I've had that where I'm like, fine. But then I. Well, I always projectile the next day.

[Makoa]

That's true.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm a puker.

[Makoa]

But I just.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I don't know. Maybe don't go. I don't know. I can't judge. I go home with people all the time. Well, no, I don't, but it's not safe to go home with a first date if you met him on the Internet.

[Makoa]

I agree with that. And I just don't think I would take anything out of anyone's dropper.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, it's. Yeah. No, no, I don't like that at all. And I've been watching every true crime documentary.

[Makoa]

Wait, go ahead.

[Tana Mongeau]

Sorry. I know. I'm just saying, like, all I've been watching is, like, all the true crime, like, serial killer documentaries. And I'm like. I don't. I didn't realize, like, so many people are doing that.

[Makoa]

Isn't it, like, you pass, like, one in every eight people, you pass a serial killer. Well, I feel like I've probably opened some into my life.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was on a date last night, and he had a hinge notification pop up.

[Makoa]

Up. No.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

He offers you scorpion venom. It's all full circle. I was just talking about you the entire time. Imagine. What? Did you say anything?

[Tana Mongeau]

No. Because it kind of made me like him more.

[Makoa]

I know, Brock. I know. Mind you, was this not the same man that you were saying? Like, he. Like, you want to end things with him because you think he's too nice, so.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I don't want to end things with him. I was just telling you, like, I would like some excitement. Like, I would like him to be.

[Makoa]

You would like a hinge notification to pop up?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes.

[Makoa]

But you're sick. That's sick.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, what I'm learning about attachment styles is that I'm an anxious avoidant. I think that's what you call it. And it's, like, I mean, historically true. Every time, like, somebody, like, comes along that, like. Like, I know it's just a natural progression, like, would naturally progress to a relationship. I have to, like, literally fight tooth and nail to like, keep myself in it because I'm like. Like, it just freaks me out. But somebody comes along who I know literally doesn't care if I live or die. Ding, ding, ding, ding. Love you.

[Makoa]

Can you. I know a decent amount about anxious avoidant when it comes to guys, and I. Obviously, it's the same thing, I guess, when it comes to girls. I just feel like you always hear the classic case of the guy, like, giving so much at the beginning and then getting anxious about it being too serious, so then he becomes avoidant. Like, what is being anxious avoidant look like for you?

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, I just think that's what it is. It's like, I, like, really like him, and I wanted. And I still do really like him, and we're, like, hanging out all the time. But I'm like, at the rate that it's going right now, we'd be dating, like, tomorrow. And that, like, freaks me out, but.

[Makoa]

I feel like you're like, oh, I want a boyfriend. I know.

[Tana Mongeau]

But, like, now that it, you know, I don't know what it is. It's the weirdest thing because it's like, there's not like, I really like him. There's nothing wrong with him.

[Makoa]

And you feel like. But it was literally over until he was.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, it just felt like it just like I was like, oh, that was really quick.

[Makoa]

Love bomb quick.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, not love bombing at all.

[Makoa]

But I noticed something with me, like, at least growing up with my parents at a young age, I always felt like I really had to fight for their love and fight for their attention. So I noticed myself carrying that into relationships. Like, I would only be. Yeah, I only felt like a relationship was fulfilling or love was true if I had to fight for it. And do you, like. Like, could you see yourself in that sentiment?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, of course. I mean, if you look at my track record, it's always that. It's always, like. Like, the need for, like, love from somebody who is not giving it to me.

[Makoa]

And so how do we break that cycle?

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't know. I think that's where better help comes in. I do. No, because seriously, because it. Like I told you the other day, I was like, this is like. It, like, actually bothers me because I'm like, there's nothing wrong at all. I love hanging out with him. I really like it. Like, there's nothing wrong. But, like, why is it terrifying to me, like, if he were to ask me to be his girlfriend tomorrow, I, like, freak out.

[Makoa]

Because it's real. Like, it's the. It's giving you the potential for, like, real love. And that's scarier than, like, fake love, essentially, right?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I guess it just feels like. I don't know. I don't, Like, I feel afraid when it's like. It feels like it's a lot of. It's up to me. People who I'm usually involved with are people that. I'm always afraid that they're going to cut it off any second. And this is, like, someone who I would, like, feel so bad if I hurt him.

[Makoa]

Yeah. So you, like, it's almost like a mechanism where you. You feel like you have to protect them from you?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I think so. Because I'm like.

[Makoa]

But that's interesting to unpack. Well, I think, because you deserve, like, all the love in the world where. But like it's not that I all.

[Tana Mongeau]

For you don't think so but it's just.

[Makoa]

I don't know but maybe it's more deep rooted than just your like immediate thoughts. I'm interested by this. What if you communicated all of this to him almost how you are to me.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know that's what I'm thinking I'm going to have to do because I really like him. Like I'm like.

[Makoa]

Yeah. Before it like gets to a sabotage area.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well I also think I just need to explain this as like. Like this is how it always goes and so I'm trying to avoid this like particular situation.

[Makoa]

I'm trying to break this cycle, this pattern that I find myself in.

[Tana Mongeau]

And yeah. So I think it is just like telling him like literally the actual truth because I don't like I would feel so bad if cuz what normally would happen in this scenario is I would just fucking freak out and then disappear.

[Makoa]

Well I guess the good thing is I feel like normally you have been more attached to or attracted to guys where you wouldn't be in this scenario and you've done a lot of mental work since you've had the opportunity to be in the scenario with like what's seemingly other than the hinge notification. So then I don't even know.

[Tana Mongeau]

But like we've been. I mean we've only known each other.

[Makoa]

For like a couple weeks type.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And I'm getting like Ryan notification after Ryan. I'm not, not dating these people but I'm the notifications.

[Makoa]

Yeah. I feel like this is such a. Like this is new territory for you and the right thing to do would.

[Tana Mongeau]

Be to just tell them how you operate healthy. I'm like but that's what I felt.

[Makoa]

Like I had to do with like ma almost in the beginning at least was like over communicate the ways that I used to be toxic and the ways that I want to be with him. Do you know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

Like in the beginning I would be like okay right now normally you know this would freak me out but I'm going to approach it as a new person. Like I had to like verbally break those patterns with him. You know like hey I'm. I would normally communicate like this. I want to communicate like this.

[Tana Mongeau]

I definitely, I agree that it's like I think it's something that has to be communicated because it's going to drive me crazy because I'm like every time. You know what I mean? I just need him to know that I'm Usually that way.

[Makoa]

I think it's like when all of your other relationships have been toxic, that that really is like the best way I've found for like myself at least. Breaking the pat patterns is just over communication, which is like fucking annoying. But like, if you find the right person who's down to over communicate and work through things with you with that method, like, there is a. There's another side.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Makoa]

I feel like it's. It's just like the tale is oldest time that we always talk about where it's like I always say, like, growing up, I. My life was a roller coaster and all of my relationships were a roller coaster. So I learned to find more peace on a roller coaster than like, if it stopped, I'd be like, wait, why did it stop? Like, if it's peaceful, that almost would freak me out more. I had to like, retrain my brain, I guess, to like, like the piece.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, because I like, I want like the pressure to be on somebody else to up. But like, I feel like when he's so good and he's so perfect, I'm like, it feels like I'm gonna it up.

[Makoa]

But he's not perfect. He's a human being and so are you. And I think it's like you have to recognize, like, hey, we both could up. But what if we both don't? And what if we both just communicate? You're right. Everything.

[Tana Mongeau]

Honestly. I'm gonna send him this clip it.

[Makoa]

That's such a funny fucking thing to do. Be like, yo, I really don't want to say this again. Just like two times, speed it and like, and then give me a call.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, it's like, it's just a conversation that literally has to be had because I'm like, I do want to break old patterns. Like, it's. It's so childish because it's like, hello, I'm 28 years old. What do you mean? Like, I'm. I need somebody who's like, playing game. Like, why am I wanting somebody who don't me. I don't.

[Makoa]

It's just a protection method that you've used thus far that like in your.

[Tana Mongeau]

I choose usually those guys because then I don't really have to worry about it, like working it out or something.

[Makoa]

And you're protecting yourself from ideally what you think your biggest pain is, which is abandonment or especially getting abandoned for who you are when in reality there's so many people who would like, love you, including me, everyone, like, for who you are, you know, and. But I think it's just like. Yeah, honestly, for all the crazy out there, if you want to break that, just start over communicating. Being like, hey, look, I'm batshit. And if you want to help with this, here's how.

[Tana Mongeau]

The good news is we have a lot of mutual friends. So he's kind of already getting like some insider information. Like, mostly, don't fucking date this girl. But.

[Makoa]

But you are so dateable and lovable, and I think that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, thank you, but you know what I mean? Like, I'm not. I'm not trying to say that I'm not. It's just like I am toxic in relationships because I've only ever been in toxic relationships. So I expect, like, I expect that from the jump. And when it's not that way, I'm like.

[Makoa]

And it's like you become like, literally physically and mentally used to that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. It's a literal addiction. Like.

[Makoa]

Yeah. And it's like a neurochemical. Like, yeah. Makeup. Like you. Like, breaking those molds isn't as easy as just saying, I don't want to be like this anymore. It's like going through pain and resistance against everything that you would innately know. And.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, but you're not gonna marry somebody that you have like, all this anxious, like, energy toward all the time, which is like every guy I've ever been with ever. I'm always like, what's he gonna do today?

[Makoa]

Yeah, and that's what I'm saying. So, like, again. But again, you might be chemically more comfortable in the what's he going to do again? Thing than going through all that pain and resistance with like, the looking in the mirror and the telling bearing your soul and the ability to get hurt in that way. But in my opinion, it's better to be hurt that way than to get cheated on because it's easier to stay in. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I agree. I don't know. I don't know how to fix it.

[Makoa]

I think you just have to really over communicate with this man. And I think it could be really good too.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think I'm going to do it right after this. I'm serious. Just Aaron says snaps.

[Makoa]

I think just you've done so much work on recognizing your patterns and how you want to change them. So don't like, regress when given the opportunity to progress.

[Tana Mongeau]

Thank you. This, I honestly, like, I appreciate you being so insightful about it because I'm talking about it like it's like. But it's like an actual real problem.

[Makoa]

Because I feel like you and I have a lot of conversations where you're like, oh, my God, like, I want to fucking find a husband. Happened.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, I'm just 28 years old. I gotta stop dating guys who are just losers.

[Makoa]

And you're aware of that. So it's like when something good comes, like, even if this guy isn't the one, like, good for it, like, gotta.

[Tana Mongeau]

Break the cycle at least. Yeah. Like, date a guy who actually likes you. Yeah.

[Makoa]

And rip the band aid off of over communicating and bearing your soul and potentially facing that pain. Because it's better than facing the same pain that you've subject yourself to 10 times.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

Even if he's not the one. And then if he's not the one, it's like, still, he was a stepping stone to getting to the one.

[Tana Mongeau]

You're right.

[Makoa]

You know? I don't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

You're right. I'm going to do it tonight. I'll tell you guys how it goes.

[Makoa]

You just slam a bottle of wine. You're like me, Tina style. You're like, listen, I'm fucking nuts.

[Tana Mongeau]

No. Well, I'm kind of. I've kind of been, like, trying, you know, like, dropping little Easter eggs.

[Makoa]

Do elaborate.

[Tana Mongeau]

I just, like, kind, like, tried to, like, drop in, like, little things here and there just to show, like. Or I'll, like, tell him, like, what I've done in past relationships. Or, like, oh, yeah.

[Makoa]

And like, then I keyed his car.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Okay. So that he, like, gets that vibe. And then he also obviously knows about, like, like, my past relationships and stuff. So, like.

[Makoa]

And he's still actively, like, pursuing you for the you that he sees in front of him. So that within itself is a green flag that you should not run away from. That's awesome. I know.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm not running away. I'm just letting you know that I.

[Makoa]

Definitely want him to. Well, I was gonna say I want him to delete Hinge and you to delete Raya, but it's also so soon.

[Tana Mongeau]

It is. It is very soon. I'm getting, like, really ahead of myself. But it's because it feels like it's progressing so fast because of the way he's talking. And, like, I'm like, oh, shit.

[Makoa]

Like, well, obviously, make sure he isn't just like a really kind love bomber.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's not love bombing.

[Makoa]

Elaborate. Like, why do you. Why do you think so? Why are you so sure?

[Tana Mongeau]

Because I've been love bombed 25,000 times.

[Makoa]

This is like, just like, kind honesty.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, that's good. I think. I don't know.

[Makoa]

I Guess that's true. How do we ever really know if we're being.

[Tana Mongeau]

I guess if I was good at identifying love bombing, I probably wouldn't have had it happen so many times.

[Makoa]

No, but it comes in all. It all shapes and sizes. Like, it really does. Like, I feel like. You know what I mean? Like, the first time I ever got love bombed, I was like, this is never gonna happen again. And then, like, it happened differently.

[Tana Mongeau]

And then. Yeah.

[Makoa]

Yeah. I guess you really always. It sucks because getting love bombed, like, scars you so much that, like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, then anything after that feels like.

[Makoa]

Like, oh, is this love bombing?

[Tana Mongeau]

No. Or the opposite. It's like, after you've been love bombed, it's like, it feels like every guy who's treating a relationship like a normal person should doesn't like you.

[Makoa]

That's true. I guess there can be, like, adverse reactions to love bombing. Like, it more so made me just want to take things really slow and know they were telling the truth. But also, like, if someone's just being kind and loving to you, like, eventually you have to take the chance on them, and that still could be love bombing. And you won't ever find out, really, until it's too late.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, good news is we're about to leave on tour in, like, a week, so I have, like, all that time to figure it out.

[Makoa]

I also think, like, I could just see you so being the type of person where you're like, I ended it with him because we're going on tour, and I just don't want to string him along. But in reality, tour is so lonely. Like, what if. What if you guys talked every day and he proved his loyalty? You know, I love for you.

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't want to end things with him. That is not what I'm saying. But I remember last time we had Mr. Big in the picture when I was on tour, and that's all I thought about all the time. And I came on here on canceled, and I was like, I cannot have a guy when I'm on tour because then I'm always thinking about, like, where are they? What are they doing? But this guy, I don't think I would be thinking, what is he doing? Because I know what he's doing.

[Makoa]

Yeah. That's the difference is that, like, when someone, like, he could potentially provide security for you. Yeah. You were thinking about Mr. Big the whole time. Because it was like, literally, he was.

[Tana Mongeau]

Laid up under some whore.

[Makoa]

Right, Exactly.

[Tana Mongeau]

Sorry.

[Makoa]

Honestly, that one was warranted. You ate with that one.

[Tana Mongeau]

Loser.

[Makoa]

I don't know. I'M just really proud of you. I think like you have recognized so many patterns that you would normally partake in and now is the time where you're facing those split roads a new.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know, but it's like a conscious. Like I have to like literally make the conscious decision where. Whereas like usually I just be like, huh, huh.

[Makoa]

That's like. I meant that with Nicole. Like that was the hardest thing ever for me. I was having to constantly make these conscious decisions that felt almost against.

[Tana Mongeau]

To just be normal.

[Makoa]

Yes. Against what I would naturally do because of me only ever knowing so much toxic love to be in a healthy, happy situation. And I still will find myself fucking like, you know what I mean, Thinking like a crazy ass bitch. And then I'm like, wait, he loves you, you love him?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

Like consciously act.

[Tana Mongeau]

You're right. It's. I mean it's not an overnight process.

[Makoa]

It's not an easy feat and like. Or an overnight process. I think that you and I have obviously, like, we talk about how we're raised so much, you know, and like how much we want to break those generational curses and like loving non toxic Lee is one of them and I don't know. It's an active decision so too.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm working on it. I'll keep you posted.

[Makoa]

You just go like smash his windows in tonight?

[Tana Mongeau]

No, he'd be like, why'd you do that?

[Makoa]

See, and that's what you need. You don't need an equal window smasher. You don't need him to go fuck your friend because you smashed his window. You need a. Why'd you do that? Ass, man. Hard to come by.

[Tana Mongeau]

He's not like a nice guy either. Like, not like a too nice of a guy.

[Makoa]

That's how I feel about Makoa though. Like if I smashed in his windows, he'd be like, you really could have handled that differently, you know, like he wouldn't give me the reaction that like me would have wanted. So it like made me change in that way, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

Like there's no point in being nuts to someone who isn't going to.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like that used to infuriate me though. Like, Joe would never fight. And I was like, hello.

[Makoa]

You got this, Brooke.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm. I'm trying.

[Makoa]

You got this. Well, I mean, dude, we leave on tour in 10 days. Less nine days, I think eight days now. Really? I'm supposed to go to New York Fashion Week tomorrow night, which might be a horrible idea before tour, but also might create for some great lore for the shows.

[Tana Mongeau]

Please don't go.

[Makoa]

Should I really not? I know. Wait.

[Tana Mongeau]

We going to finish.

[Makoa]

This might be our last episode on the couch before we leave. Maybe we'll do one more. Maybe we'll have Alex Moran on and get the tea.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Makoa]

But we've got a lot of preparing to do for this final leg of the canceled cross country tour and we.

[Tana Mongeau]

Are so fucking excited to see you guys.

[Makoa]

And now we gotta go over to the Patreon and talk some as we do. I love you guys so much. I hope you enjoyed today's episode. I really sat down with a sparkle in my eye and these bugs. If I just have one more altercation with 80,000 bugs like some something, I'm going to go into cardiac arrest. So I hope we still delivered a beautiful episode for you guys because we love you so very much and we will talk to you in the next episode of the canceled podcast. Bye.

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