Juan Soto, Tush Push Ban, and a Eulogy for Hooters | with The Kid Mero

Summary

Casuals with Katie Nolan: Episode Summary

Title: Juan Soto, Tush Push Ban, and a Eulogy for Hooters | with The Kid Mero
Release Date: February 25, 2025
Host: Katie Nolan
Guest: Miro (The Kid Mero)

---

1. Introduction and Welcome
Katie Nolan opens the 11th episode of Casuals with Katie Nolan with her signature enthusiasm, expressing gratitude to listeners and introducing the episode's guest, Miro, known as The Kid Mero. She sets the tone for a relaxed yet insightful discussion on current sports topics, blending humor with knowledgeable commentary.

---

2. Juan Soto’s Monumental Move to the Mets
The episode kicks off with an in-depth analysis of Juan Soto’s surprising 15-year, $765 million contract with the New York Mets, previously a Yankee fan favorite. Katie expresses disappointment but maintains her fandom loyalty.

Katie Nolan [11:34]: "I was disappointed, but I wasn't mad. Soto is chasing records and the most money possible."

Miro shares his enthusiasm and recounts personal anecdotes about Soto, including playful interactions in gaming environments, highlighting Soto’s popularity beyond the baseball diamond.

Miro [16:25]: "Juan Soto hitting a home run in his first game with the Mets is phenomenal. Great work, social team!"

They discuss the implications of such a long-term deal and its impact on both the Yankees and Mets franchises, emphasizing Soto’s influence and marketability.

---

3. Yankees’ Facial Hair Policy: A Changing Identity
The conversation shifts to the Yankees' outdated facial hair policy, which has long restricted players’ grooming styles. Katie and Miro debate the necessity and impact of this policy on team image and player individuality.

Katie Nolan [20:14]: "The Yankees' facial hair policy made players look completely different and sometimes weird."

Miro criticizes the policy, suggesting it detracts from the players' natural appearances and team relatability. They agree that lifting the ban allows players to express themselves more freely, enhancing team spirit and fan connection.

Miro [21:04]: "I need Garrett Cole to have a chin and a neck. You can create that with a beard."

---

4. NFL’s Tush Push Ban: Strategy vs. Sportsmanship
Katie and Miro delve into the NFL’s proposed ban on the Tush Push play, popularized by the Philadelphia Eagles. They critique the move as detrimental to the sport's integrity and entertainment value.

Katie Nolan [33:12]: "I feel like it's cheap. It's just a bunch of big guys pushing around, not showcasing real skills."

Miro agrees, likening it to overcomplicated strategies that undermine the fundamental aspects of football. They argue for a return to more traditional, skill-based plays that highlight player talent and game strategy.

Miro: "Play the game. Let my defense get a chance to strip the ball, punch it out."

---

5. The Closure of Hooters: A Cultural Reflection
The hosts nostalgically discuss the recent closure of Hooters, examining its cultural significance and the shift in societal attitudes towards such establishments.

Katie Nolan [56:18]: "It's sad that Hooters is closing. Those jobs will be lost."

They reflect on how easy access to digital content has replaced the need for physical venues like Hooters, noting the loss of a unique social and dining experience.

Miro: "If we want to eat wings and look at boobs, we can see full nips online. Hooters is no longer necessary."

---

6. Hot Mic Segment: Candid Moments in Sports
In their popular Hot Mic segment, Katie and Miro share amusing and candid recordings of sports figures caught off guard:

• Steve Smith Sr. Affair Allegations:
  They discuss the controversy surrounding Steve Smith Sr., who was accused of an extramarital affair, highlighting the invasive nature of social media interactions among athletes.

Katie Nolan [41:12]: "Steve Smith Sr. was caught on a hot mic talking about his personal life in a way that shouldn't be public."

• Conan O’Brien Hosting the Oscars:
  A humorous take on Conan O’Brien’s hosting style, blending pop culture with sports commentary.

---

7. Stephen A. Smith’s Presidential Run: A Comic Relief
The duo humorously speculates about ESPN personality Stephen A. Smith running for president in 2028, dissecting his fit for political office with light-hearted banter.

Katie Nolan [45:52]: "Stephen A. Smith running for president? America, look at me!"

They poke fun at the idea, questioning the relevance of sports media skills in the political arena while enjoying the absurdity of the notion.

---

8. Upcoming Sports and Entertainment Events
Wrapping up the episode, Katie and Miro highlight key events to watch in the coming week, including:

• IndyCar Grand Prix of St. Petersburg:
  Encouraging listeners to tune in for the season opener, they discuss the differences between IndyCar, NASCAR, and F1 racing.

Producer Chris [72:31]: "IndyCar is similar to F1 with open-wheel cars, offering thrilling races on various courses."

• Mavericks vs. Lakers Game:
  They preview the intense match-up featuring Luka Doncic facing his former team, touching on his stellar performance and fan dynamics.

Miro: "Luka is going to get a bigger cheer than any of the Dallas players tonight."

• Academy Awards:
  Previewing the Oscars, they discuss potential nominees and the impact of streaming services on movie viewership.

Producer Chris [72:52]: "Conclave and Nora are front-runners for Best Picture, with exciting performances to watch."

---

9. Conclusion and Sign-Off
Katie and Miro express their appreciation for each other’s contributions and the listeners' support, promising more engaging content in future episodes. They reiterate the podcast’s focus on blending sports with pop culture in an approachable and entertaining manner.

Katie Nolan [80:43]: "Thank you all so much for being here. I love you. See you Thursday!"

---

Notable Quotes:

• Katie Nolan:
  "If you love sports but don't want to be yelled at by old men in suits, Casuals is for you!" [00:31]

• Miro:
  "Juan Soto hitting a home run in his first game with the Mets is phenomenal. Great work, social team!" [16:25]

• Katie Nolan:
  "The Red Sox have had some success. I'll still be like, yo, the Red Sox, y'all suck." [16:53]

• Miro:
  "Beards are facials for dudes." [22:19]

• Katie Nolan:
  "We're cooked." [47:23]

This episode of Casuals with Katie Nolan masterfully intertwines personal anecdotes, sports analysis, and cultural commentary, delivering a comprehensive and entertaining listen for both casual sports fans and enthusiasts alike.

Transcript

[A]

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For 140 years, MultiCare has been in Washington prioritizing long term solutions, partnering with local communities and expanding access to care. Together we're building a healthier future. Learn [e-mail] what is up welcome to Casualty Visuals, the podcast that's about sports but like in a chill way and isn't weird about it. I'm Katie Nolan. I'm your host. We have a lot to get to today. Do I say that in every single podcast? This is our 11th episode, you guys. We're like in the thick of it. It's like a real podcast. Thank you for listening to it. I really appreciate it. If you want to get in touch with us, you can do so and you have been doing so. And thank you. You can email us Casuals with Katie nolan gmail.com our voicemail box is 646-801-0043 on IG and tick tock. We are at Casualsthepod all the places that you can reach us to let us know what you think, but only if it's nice. If you're saying something mean, none of those are going to work. It's going to bounce right back. Phone number is just going to be a busy signal. So maybe take a minute, think about something nice instead and then call back and then you can leave a voicemail. We have a lot to get to the kid Miro is going to be in studio with us. Very exciting. But we start every podcast with a yap. And today's yap is like sports adjacent kind of. Right? But I was watching. I'm going to be honest, I didn't watch the SAG Awards. I wish I did because all the clips I saw, I was like, oh, this was actually seemed kind of entertaining. Like there was a moment where they, Kiki Palmer and Colman Domingo said to the audience, like imagine if everybody here, if you had to take a sip like A Take a drink if you've ever been on Law and Order. And then they went around the room and all the people that you saw reach for their drinks. You really forget every actor coming up, even when they were like a child. Like, I think Sabrina Carpenter has been on Law and Order. Like, it's a. It's a. An institution. And I thought it was a very cool thing. Then there was also, like, a. A couple just good moments at the SAG Awards. But the one that really made it to my timeline was Timothy Chalamet's acceptance speech. He won best actor for A Complete Unknown, so he won for that. And in his speech, he sort of said, you know, it's. It's rare to. I know it's rare to hear actors talk like this, but I want to be one of the greats. Like, I'm really trying to be one of the best to ever do this. He mentioned people who inspired him. Some were actors who were in the room. And then he also mentioned Michael Jordan and Michael Phelps. And I saw somebody online reference Bradley Cooper, and they said, you know, I find it really interesting. Bradley Cooper did something similar a few years ago, and we all hated him for it. And. And Timothee Chalamet does it, and, you know, he's. He gets praise. And so I, I. As a reminder, if you don't remember, Bradley Cooper, a year ago or two years ago, was really gunning for an Oscar with that movie Maestro, which was the Leonard Bernstein biopic, and he. He, like, directed it, starred in it. It was a whole thing. And I think what was picked up on by a lot of people in the media and also just, you know, people who watch stuff was. Seemed very thirsty for the Oscar. He seemed very much like it really mattered to him that he'd be taken seriously as an actor, and he. He wanted to really be recognized for that and get the Oscar. So seeing this person make this comparison, I immediately was like, well, I don't think those two things are the same. And I realized I might not think they're the same because I love sports. Timothy Chalamet famously knows Ball. I think we all saw him on college game day. He just seems like a. A sports fan. And so I think it makes sense for me that he would see it this way as well. To a sports fan, this is kind of clearly like the difference between going to a team in search trying to get a title, or, like, helping your team get a title, like wanting a title, right? So this is like, it's almost like Bradley Cooper. You could See as, like, just as a comp. Not saying this was even my opinion. It's just a general opinion. Kevin Durant in 2016, when he went to the warriors after the warriors had a 73 win season. And yeah, they didn't win the finals that year, they lost in seven games to the Cavs. But it was clearly a team that was going to win, and he went to that team and he won the next year. Different than, say, a Michael Jordan, you know, somebody who's on a team and wants to be the greatest at something. Somebody who's driven by the. It's Chalamet mentioned in his speech that, like, we're in a subjective industry, and he mentioned that, like, the. The trophy isn't what he's going for, but it is useful encouragement on his path to what he's trying to do. And I just found that really interesting because, Brady, I don't know if we left it in the podcast, but you had mentioned the other day how interesting it is to you to hear people talk about art and sports. And because art is so subjective and sports are pretty objective in terms of, like, did you score a point? You get the points? There isn't really a debate about whether or not the point was scored. And so I just think in a discussion about subjectivity and objectivity between art and sports, I immediately recognized what Chalamet was doing. And it made sense to me that people saw that differently and in a different light than what they saw with Bradley Cooper. I feel like also, if we want to continue going with the. With the metaphor, you know, Chalamet knowing Ball understands it. Dating a member of the Kardashian family. Tell me something. More athlete than dating a Kardashian. I feel like that's a. That's part of the whole deal. So, yeah, short little yap. It's just one of those things when you see something in the entertainment industry and you go, oh, sports can explain this. Sports can make this make more sense to you. And that's why a podcast about the intersection of sports and pop culture is so important, and the world really needs it. Speaking of things the world really needs, I think the world needs to hear from my friend Miro. I have not seen Miro. I mean, I don't think it's been since garbage time, but it's been a. A long time. At least five to seven years since I've seen him. And. And when I first found out I was getting a podcast and I was coming up with the list of guests I wanted to talk to, it's happened around the same time the news came across the wires that Juan Soto, who was at the time playing for the New York Yankees on a one year deal, was going to go to the New York mets on a 15 year, $765 million deal. And the first person I thought of that I wanted to talk to was Miro, one of the only Yankees fans I talked to. The one of the only Yankees fans I'm interested in hearing the opinion of. Um, I had to get him in here specifically to talk about that. Uh, and then obviously want to talk to him about other things because we have a lot going on in the sports world. We're going to touch on all of it. We talk about the Yankees changing their facial hair policy. We talk about the proposed ban of the tush push. We talk about whatever happened with Steve Smith senior over the weekend and whether or not Stephen A. Smith is going to run for president. We have a lot to talk about with Miro. I was so excited. If you you may know him from Jesus and Miro Bodega Boys. They had a show in Showtime, they had a show on Vice. He's currently host of the Victory light podcast and 7pm in Brooklyn with Carmelo Anthony. You can find both of those on YouTube. His YouTube channel is @. According to the kid. I love him. I'm happy he's here. Let's waste no more time and chat with my friend Miro.

[A]

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[B]

Our state has changed a lot in the last 140 years. We know because Multicare has been here guided by a single purpose. Making our communities healthier. That comes from making courageous decisions, partnering with local communities to grow programs and services and expanding healthcare access to those who need it most. Together, we're building a healthier future. Learn [e-mail] the reason I wanted you here the second I found out I was having a podcast and I heard the Juan Soto news. I was like, all right, so we gotta get Miro on to talk about this because you loved Juan Soto.

[A]

I did. I saw.

[B]

Okay, and we'll get to that. Before he became a Yankee, you were already a Juan Soto fan, 100%. So you must have been thrilled when he became a Yankee.

[A]

And then Call of Duty buddies.

[B]

Yeah, like playing War Zone. Like, wait, really?

[A]

Like, yeah, During COVID and stuff.

[B]

You're like friends.

[A]

Yeah. So he. It was funny because he. I. There's a cut scene in NBA 2K. I don't know if it's 20 or 2119. I don't know what year.

[B]

It's all the same game, right?

[A]

Yeah. I don't know what year it was, but I'm in it as like an interview.

[B]

That's sick.

[A]

And so like, if you play like my career, at some point, like Katie. Katie Nolan, the point guard, rookie point guard, comes in to talk to the kid Merrill, and I'm like, yo, you kind of playing ass this week, yo. Hey, what, they getting down on you. How you feel about that? And then, you know, you got to answer correctly. So he sent me like a screen grab of him. Like the Juan Soto, the point guard.

[B]

That's fine.

[A]

Interviewed by. By me be like, loco, yo, you said I was whack.

[B]

That's very funny.

[A]

You're very good. I love you very much.

[B]

Yeah, you love him very much.

[A]

And now I knew he was coming way before everybody else, you know he's.

[B]

Coming to the Yankees.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I'm saying that's good.

[B]

You couldn't single.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You can't trust me with that information.

[A]

Yeah, listen.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I was gonna call you Taylor and be like, haha. But I did. I. I was like, first of all, we haven't spoken in a while and that's not the first. Like, you know, it would have been okay.

[B]

It would have been okay. It would have. It would. I. It's part. It's par for the course for us, the Sox, Yankees relationship that we have, which is why it's leading our show that I want to say Juan Soto no longer on the Yankees.

[A]

Yes. With the mess the New York Metropolitan.

[B]

And. And I want to know truly in your all Caps style how that felt when you found that out.

[A]

Hey, hey. And this is not. Look, you might look at me and be like, this guy's about to lie. I see you.

[B]

I can tell you there's no chance you weren't mad.

[A]

No, listen, so I was, I was, I wasn't mad. I was, I was, I was Disappointed. I was like, you know, like. But I had spoken to a lot of people.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That said one thing to me.

[B]

What?

[A]

And it was. It was like multiple people saying the same thing. If we lose, he's out of here. If we win, he's. He stays. But they're gonna have to give him a bag. And then at the end of the day, I was like, bro, he's a Boris guy. He's just gonna go for the most money possible, break a record. You know what I'm saying? Like, I feel like Boris is like a billion. One of the billionaire dudes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's just like, yo, I got 50 billion. There's no possible way I could spend this money in my lifetime, but I want 100 crazy. You know what I mean? Like, I want to break another record. You know what I'm saying? So that's why I have all my three children studying under Scott Boris right now. Smart to get Nil deals.

[B]

Really smart stuff for tumbling.

[A]

I don't even know what my oldest son does, you know?

[B]

But he'll figure it out.

[A]

He'll figure the out.

[B]

Somebody will pay him.

[A]

Bowling.

[B]

Yeah. Something. The money's there.

[A]

The money's there, Nil.

[B]

Yeah, go get it. Oh, he's got to go get image.

[A]

Likeness. But, yes, I was. I was disappointed, Katie. But I wasn't like, yo, fuck this guy. Because listen, my Dominicanness outweighs my Yankee.

[B]

That was what I was going to ask was like, which are you more loyal to?

[A]

I'm a fan of Poppy.

[B]

Yeah, well, you. I mean, how could you not be? Yeah.

[A]

I love Manny and the vacant stare that he has in his nowadays. Crazy like Katie. I liked when I hit the ball. Katie. I remember one time I did an interview with Boston radio station, and you called. You was 8 years old, and I said, wow, this little girl is so little. And she calling on the phone, man. That was cool, man.

[B]

I loved Manny.

[A]

So Jesus Christ is my Lord and savior. That's you, Lord and savior, man. Katie, man, I play virtual reality P with the ball, man.

[B]

I.

[A]

It's just that I know at timing.

[B]

If you don't know, this is a spot on impersonation. It's very, very good.

[A]

My uncle played with him at George Washington.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. Shout out to Elvis. You know what I'm saying? Duran. Not, not. Not that guy. They have the same exact name, which is insane. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

For a second, I was like, Nepo.

[A]

No.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, tangentially related to Alfonso Soriano. Dominic is a. Wow, bro.

[B]

This feels like Something I can't. It has to come from you as a source. Otherwise it sounds like I'm being like, you must be all related. You know each other.

[A]

Yeah. All you guys are the Bronx, live in one building.

[B]

Okay, so all time favorite Dominican baseball players.

[A]

Oh, top five, man. Top five of all time.

[B]

All time.

[A]

Oof. Tony Pena. Number one.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Canoe. Number two.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Juan Soto, Number three.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Yeah, he's up there, bro.

[B]

He's good.

[A]

After all that time, he's good. Mariano Duncan. We played today. We would today. Number four and number five, my uncle, Pedro Martinez.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm saying the best. He's literally my uncle.

[B]

Not literally like blood, but, like, stop doing that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's twice now. I thought that you were related to somebody that you're not related to.

[A]

This is my nephew.

[B]

Oh, that's cool.

[A]

The Chimero Martinez.

[B]

That's really cool. That's very cool. I brought my mom to the Emmys the year I lost. I didn't know at the time.

[A]

Still a flex, though, by the way.

[B]

I didn't know at the time. I mean, kind of, but less so when you're like, I really thought I was going to win for her in her face. But we were leaving that room, it's like a big auditorium, and Pedro was there, and my mom was like, katie, Katie, Katie, you have to introduce me to Pedro. I was like, ma, I don't know. I still look at Pedro that way. I don't know him. And she ran up to him and grabbed his hands and she said, pedro, I love you. And I was, like, mortified. But he was like, I love you too.

[A]

That's it.

[B]

I was about to say, so sweet. It was so. I was like, this poor man. I'm like, I'm so sorry. And he was like, I love you too. Listen, this tiny little woman.

[A]

I want to say something is very important. Dominican men, we get a bad rap. You know what I'm saying? We get a bad rap as philanderers, you know what I'm saying? If you watch a lot of 90 day fiance, okay, this is the worst of us is a 98 fiance. But what we are is romantic, you know? I'm saying affable people.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So I knew before you even said what he was going to say. I just added the mommy at the end. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

He might have. He might have.

[A]

Oh, I love you too, Mommy.

[B]

He might have.

[A]

Thank you so much for. For loving me. Yeah, and I love you too.

[B]

She melted. He melted her. It worked.

[A]

You know What I'm saying, he's got a lot of. He's got a lot of riz.

[B]

He. He absolutely full of riz. He's rizzed up, as the kids would say. All right, so then I don't know if you saw this, you know, if you're keeping up with his career, but Juan Soto hitting a home run in his first thing with the Mets.

[A]

If I'm keeping up with his career. If I'm keeping. If I open my eyes and look at my phone, I saw that eighty hundred times, like, with different rap songs where, like the. When the beat drops, he hits the home run.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, yo, give me a break.

[B]

Which is always cool, by the way. I do love those.

[A]

Yeah. It's phenomenal. Great work, social team. Yo, Met fans, calm the down. You're the Mets, bro. Like, I don't know how many times I gotta say this.

[B]

Katie, say it again.

[A]

The Red Sox have had some success. I'll still be like, yo, the Red Sox, y'all suck.

[B]

Whatever.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? Like, he's a. He's a big baby. He's all. But he's dead. So I have to show I love.

[B]

I love Devers. He's not a baby.

[A]

He's a baby. He has a face.

[B]

He doesn't have a baby. But. Well, that's because the cheeks.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Are full of gum.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Or whatever.

[A]

Whatever.

[B]

Knows, like, I mean, that would be an entire crate of Zinn.

[A]

So much the minutes in. There you go. I just. I just. I just did that.

[B]

What? So Mets. How do you feel about Mets fans?

[A]

They're good, bro. You know what? My. My homeboy told me that is a Mets fan. I said, bro, look, Juan Soto hitting. Who's hitting after Juan Soto on the Mets? Who's hitting after Juan Soto on the Yankees? Aaron.

[B]

Which was crazy. And you guys didn't win the World Series with that.

[A]

It's just nuts because that's not what it's all about.

[B]

No, it's not just.

[A]

It's not just hitting.

[B]

Isn't it about the World Series? But you're saying not just.

[A]

But also. Yeah, but it's also not just about winning World Series for the Yankees. It is because we are so, so successful and we have historic, dominant, historic franchise back then. That forever in the history of the sport.

[B]

Right.

[A]

But back then, a sport that is so old.

[B]

So old. So just like most of your championships. Very old.

[A]

Listen, that. And that's. People could say that. But then also, as a Boston fan.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, big fan. Of Bill Russell and what he did for, you know, civil rights and the movement and everything like that. Also, all your championships were from before the civil rights movement.

[B]

So what are we really talking about here?

[A]

It's just historical. Legacy of legacy. Legacy franchise.

[B]

You're right. The banners are banners.

[A]

The banners are banners.

[B]

Doesn't really matter where they came from.

[A]

All right? If it was KG or if it was Robert Parish, it counts the same to you. Okay, that's true.

[B]

So he makes a good point.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? Mickey Mantle never mentioned, never saw you probably didn't even live in the same era. That's fine. You're a hero. I love you, too. You might have called me a slur. Don't matter, don't care. You know what I'm saying? You are a legend.

[B]

Does it suck having him, Juan Soto, still in New York?

[A]

No, because it's like, you know, it could still be. I could still see him out on, like, Dykeman or something, like. And be like, yo, pass the hookah, bro. Yo, we lit do like the whole.

[B]

He's out on Dyckman a lot, smoking hookah.

[A]

I mean, you know what else is listening? I'm a Dominican from New York City. I could tell you that Dominicans have creatures of habit. Yeah, we're creatures of habit, Katie.

[B]

So you do the same things no matter where you.

[A]

If we find something, if I have fun on this show, I'm coming back here next week, even if I'm not the guest.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

I'm just pulling up. You're going to be like, yo, yo, Meryl's outside again.

[B]

Again.

[A]

There's going to be a little camera. This is going to be me staring at the camera like a weirdo. We're creatures of habit. If we enjoy ourselves, we go back.

[B]

That actually explains the Mets. It's like, he doesn't want to leave New York. He just wanted more money.

[A]

Right. I want more money. I'm having a good time here.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? I don't got to shave, which, if you would have waited, you know what I'm saying?

[B]

I mean, crazy that that's gone now.

[A]

I mean, it's a like. Like it's about damn time.

[B]

Yeah. So the. For those who don't know, because we are casuals, so we don't assume anybody knows. The Yankees have always had a policy that you. And it has cost them. I feel like some. Some people. But it has also caused a lot of people going to the Yankees to look completely different.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Like, John Damon is the first one that comes to mind for me. I remember when I heard that Johnny Damon was going to the Yankees, I was like, how?

[A]

That's crazy possible.

[B]

And then you see his face and you're like, who's that?

[A]

Who is that? That's not him. That's why I was okay with it, by the way.

[B]

What?

[A]

Because if he would have shown up looking like Jesus, like, how he was with y'all.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I would have been like, this doesn't sit right with me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

It didn't sit right with me looking at that much of his face. Some people, you're just not meant to see that much of their cheeks.

[A]

I mean, I saw him and I was just like, is he part Native American? I'm saying, like, I like his bone structure.

[B]

Bone structure is different. I didn't notice that before.

[A]

Yeah, because it was too much.

[B]

Are you glad they finally got rid of this stupid policy?

[A]

Yeah, in a way. You know, I'm saying, like, part because it's like. Like, you know, like guys like Austin Wells, like, we're just like, yeah, I'm just going to do the mustache. I'm like, bro, you look. It looks weird.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I need Garrett Cole to have a chin and a neck. You know what I'm saying? And you could create that with a beard.

[B]

Is he. Is he going to. Is he a facial hair guy? Because I can't stand his face. My God, he's top of my. Of guys I can't stand.

[A]

From the Yankees, Devin Harris. The guy just got.

[B]

Who.

[A]

Who's relief pitcher? You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[A]

His first name is Devin Williams.

[B]

Williams. Harris is so close to Williams in terms of, like, white last names. You were very close.

[A]

You know, I mean, he's black, so. But same. Yeah, Harris Williams. Same, same thing. Whatever. Harris wall. Harris Williams, 20, 28. But he looked crazy, too.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

With just a little mustache. He looked like a little baby with a mustache.

[B]

Like a baby with a mustache.

[A]

It looks crazy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm not with that. I don't like that. So.

[B]

I've always hated it.

[A]

I also need a beard, too. I'm a beard guy.

[B]

Yeah. Have I seen you without.

[A]

I look like I'm. I look like I am 15 years old.

[B]

But isn't that nice sometimes?

[A]

No.

[B]

I wish I had something I could take off of my face to make me look younger that wasn't like three layers of skin.

[A]

Listen, I've got facials a yo. But. And I. I get where you're coming from. They're very good.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They're important, but, like. Yeah. Now, beards are facials for dudes. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Okay. That's. Put that in a T shirt. Beards are facials for dudes.

[A]

There you go.

[B]

It was a dumb policy. Why did they care in the first place?

[A]

It's just some dumb old. Because we were talking about, like, legacy teams.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The Celtics probably have some dumb, stupid rule where it's just like, yo, you can never disparage the leprechaun or some shit like that, or, Kevin Garnett will beat you up.

[B]

It is a rule. You've read our secret rule book. Who showed that to you? An outsider.

[A]

You can't step on lucky. It's like. It's like running over the mound in baseball. It's a written rule. You got to run around him.

[B]

Don't touch.

[A]

On a fast break.

[B]

You don't touch. Our little offensive but allowed mascot.

[A]

Right?

[B]

The only offensive portrayal of somebody that is allowed.

[A]

That's crazy. Irish people. What's up, man? Y'all not gonna. Y'all not gonna do nothing? They're not gonna be like, hey, technically, we don't look like that.

[B]

Technically, you could address that to me.

[A]

Oh, shit. That's right.

[B]

I'm a court. I think a quarter quarter Irish.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Nolan is Irish. The rest of it's Italian.

[A]

I always wondered. Yo. And it's probably not true. What? Do you have any relationship to Christopher Noah?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

No.

[A]

I don't know. Why would be.

[B]

No, we're not related. And unfortunately, I don't have. I'm not a part of any sort of nationality or heritage where I can say, he's like my uncle or any. He's. I don't know that man.

[A]

The third cousin.

[B]

No. I respect what he does. I understand about a third of his movies, and I. And I. And I like him a lot, but not related.

[A]

Shout to Nolan, man, because he'll make some.

[B]

That crazy.

[A]

It's. It's. You know, the first. Listen, if you describe a piece of film to me.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And the first adjective you use is important.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm like, get this shit the out of here, bro. Get it out of here. I don't want it if it's not good. Funny. Like a good time. No.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's important.

[B]

Did you see what was the most confusing. What was that really confusing? Christopher Nolan. One that was around the pandemic. It was the one where you have to, like, go back in time to fight a war in the future. Tenant.

[A]

Tenant. Yeah, with Den. Damn. I was gonna say Denzel Jr. That is horrible. John David Washington.

[B]

I mean, that's Denzel Jr.

[A]

He's his own man. Right. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

But he's his. He's good. He's a good actor.

[A]

He's a.

[B]

He's really good. Did you see that movie?

[A]

I did. It was great.

[B]

I didn't understand it at all.

[A]

I didn't either. I mean, I did because I was like, yeah, word.

[B]

I got my brain to a point where it felt like it understood it, but if I had to tell you right now what it was about.

[A]

No, no way.

[B]

No way.

[A]

But he did. That other movie was Zendaya. That was pre cool. It was like black and white. It's like character driven drama.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I didn't see that unfaithful couple, but I feel like I meant to see it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I didn't.

[A]

It's like some shit you watch with your. With your. With your partner and you're like, yo.

[B]

This would never be us. We're better than this. Yeah. We're in love. Different.

[A]

Yeah. Yo, your fucking feet stink. Get the fuck off the couch. Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

I was also going to ask you about. Did you see Juan Soto had to give up stuff to get the number that he wanted?

[A]

Yo, can I tell you something?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

My man. Yo, I love you, bro. I'll subtitle this later.

[B]

I was gonna.

[A]

I said all that in Spanish. All I said was understand.

[B]

I heard the word understand.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I heard more.

[A]

Yo, fam, you got the biggest contract in baseball besides Shohei, who's forget. It's crazy.

[B]

It's crazy.

[A]

Forget it. We're not even gonna talk about that.

[B]

Crazy.

[A]

You got the biggest contract in baseball after him. And you got him a Chevy, bro.

[B]

Yeah, a $92,000 black Chevy Tahoe with a giant red bow on it like a Christmas commercial.

[A]

Come on, dog. And then you bring the beginning. If you're going to do all that and have a video and have the social team, like, get the Osmos out, like, at least. Come on. The Osmo Pocket 3 with the. With the little clip mic. With the furry clip mic. If you're going to do all that, get him a Urus. You know what I mean? Get him.

[B]

I mean, I guess it's what he wanted.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know.

[B]

I guess that's what.

[A]

Yeah, he's.

[B]

He wanted. Brett Beatty, who was probably not going to make the lineup anyway, agreed to give up the jersey number. 22. It's just a number. Soto got Beatty's number and texted him that a gift was coming. Then asked around and found out that Beatty had always wanted a giant black on black SUV. He'd been driving a 2016 4Runner. When they got to spring training, Soto delivered him a $92,000 black Chevy Tahoe.

[A]

Katie, we're casuals.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But even casuals know baseball players make more money than God.

[B]

Yes. I mean, because they're allowed to. There's no cap on what they can make.

[A]

Yes. I am hoping that my son decides that he does not want to be a tight end and that he would rather play third base.

[B]

Yeah. You should take the option away.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Of tight ends.

[A]

And he. Whenever I. I mean, I'm trying to, but he loves football. You know what I'm saying? And like, you know, get a scholarship. Sure. But like, my thing with him is just like every time he steps in the box right handed, I hit him with a rock. You know what I'm saying? Like, yo, you are a left handed batter. I don't care if it feels unnatural. It's. Eventually it will feel natural. And you are going to b.

[B]

The younger you start doing it, the more natural it'll feel when you get older. Imagine he does both. That's.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Very valuable.

[A]

Very valuable in the Major League baseball.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's what I'm looking for, Roi.

[B]

Yeah, of course. Because a child is an eye and you need the ro from it. Four. You have four kids?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

How old is the oldest?

[A]

When we last saw each other, I.

[B]

Remember it's a long time ago, so.

[A]

Maybe I was at like 2.

[B]

Yeah. I think I want to say. I thought. I thought you stopped at three.

[A]

So I had three boys.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Or we had three boys. I'm saying I shot the other. We had three boys and it was like, yo, like, the last two were like accidents.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The first two were like, yo, Chinese calendar. Ovulation.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Map it out. Yo, you have to sex, y'all finish your grilled cheese. We have to have sex.

[B]

The good way to do it. Always fun to make.

[A]

Super romantic.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Not transactional at all. Not like, yo, are you done? Stay there.

[B]

You know, I heard I have to say a prayer while you're in me. Before you can leave.

[A]

Before you can leave.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? Like, you have to wipe your feet.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

I don't know. Whatever the. I don't even know what the. I was talking about the four. My fourth child Is my daughter excited and I a baby girl? Yeah, man. Like I am. I understand. I used to be a girl, dad.

[B]

Now you get it.

[A]

Yeah, I totally get it. Yeah, I totally get it. Like, you know, I'm sure if I spoke to your dad, he'd be like, yeah, yeah, it's true.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Your dad is Christopher Nolan, by the way. Which is crazy. She was just like, yeah, we have crazy.

[B]

More successful. It's crazy. He's not really hooking it up for me. Dad.

[A]

Dad.

[B]

But come on. So you think you should have paid him all that or you should have given him that car to get that number, or you think he could have done more?

[A]

I think he could have done more. You got a lot more money, bro. Maybe buy him too. If that's. Because if that's the one piece that I did miss was that he really wanted a black on black suv.

[B]

Yeah. But just I was as. I'm reading him, like, he didn't actually say he wanted a Tahoe, you know, Is Juan Soto cheap?

[A]

I'm not gonna call him cheap because 92 bands is still a lot of money.

[B]

Still a lot of money in this economy. Maybe not to a guy with as much money as he has.

[A]

Right.

[B]

But still a lot of money.

[A]

Right. Still like tough economy. To the. To the common man. Yeah, the common man with 20 chains on. On casuals. That is. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Nice chain. What's the. Pete. What is that?

[A]

Is it. It's an homage to Biggie Cuban's with the Jesus piece with my peeps, you know? You know, got that. But let's not focus on that because I don't have any. I'm not anywhere near CEO money. You know what I'm saying? Not at all. Not even in the same. No, no. Never will be.

[B]

I don't know. Maybe.

[A]

No, don't say that.

[B]

Okay. Sorry.

[A]

It will never happen.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

I will never. I need to walk out of this building straight into my car and not be assassinated.

[B]

I mean, we mentioned Shohei. He gave Joe Kelly a brand new Porsche.

[A]

See, there you go.

[B]

When he wanted number 17.

[A]

There you go.

[B]

I just feel like.

[A]

See, you got to ask around, Katie.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Has anybody ever. Is there precedent here? That's what I would do if I was. If I was js, that's short for wants to call him. So I'm like, you know, yo, js, like, you know, ask around.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you know, I guess he didn't because I would have got him at least like an Escalade. Bro, come on.

[B]

There's been some crazy things that people have given in order to get the numbers they want. Like in. In 97, I guess Roger Clemens gave Carlos Delgado 15, half a brick of coke.

[A]

Whoa. That's crazy. I mean, it was that time.

[B]

I mean, $15,000 in a Rolex. Okay, that's pretty good.

[A]

That's nice.

[B]

Tom Glavin paid to build a nursery for Joe McEwing's daughter in exchange for number 47 in 2003.

[A]

That's mad practical.

[B]

I mean, build it himself. Oh, paid to build it. Okay. I thought it was gonna say, like, he got in there.

[A]

Tom Glavin in there.

[B]

Just like we go in pink or purple for this. What do we pay? What's the color scheme of signals? Yeah, Madison Bumgarner gave Andrew. Is it Chafin? Andrew Schaffen. And an undisclosed amount for number 40 after Chafin turned down initial offers of new boots, a new rv, and a horse.

[A]

Oh, so he leveraged it.

[B]

He was like, none of those. Just cash.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, give me money.

[B]

Yeah, well, interesting.

[A]

Listen, I don't know. I don't. I feel. I feel uncomfortable. I feel. Is it. Is it gauche?

[B]

Gauche?

[A]

Ghosh, Ghosh. Is it gauche to give people cash as a gift?

[B]

I don't know. I. I always think this now before weddings where I'm like, how much are we putting in here? Because it used to be if you gave, like, a couple hundred, you were the generous guest. But now I feel like if I give anything less than 100, it's like, what's this for?

[A]

What do you.

[B]

100 has to be the floor. Like, you can't. What am I gonna give you, 20 bucks?

[A]

What is this for, a box of cornflakes?

[B]

You got married. This. I know this where we're at. Cost a ton of money. Because weddings now, as I'm learning since I'm engaged, but not yo. Yet. It's a lot of money.

[A]

Married for 138,000 years.

[B]

I thought you were gonna say you're gonna give me $138,000 at my wedding. And I was like, invited. Invited, Yo. Hey, invited.

[A]

Listen, I don't have that kind of money.

[B]

I'd take a Chevy Tahoe.

[A]

You've always wanted one.

[B]

I've always wanted one. Black on black. All right, we'll pivot to football. Did you see this? The Tush Push story that the Packers. The Green Bay packers have proposed to ban. The Tush Push, a play that's been popularized and perfected by the Philadelphia Eagles. The Tush push is implemented when a team needs minimal yardage and for a fresh set of downs and is achieved by lining two players up behind the quarterback and pushing him from behind. Packer COO Mark Murphy called the play quote bad for the game after the Eagles beat the packers in the playoffs. Do you have thoughts on this Tush push? People hate it.

[A]

I hate it.

[B]

You hate it. Why?

[A]

I feel like it's like. It's like, cheap.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? Like, it's just. I feel. Did you see what happened? Well, I mean, listen, casuals NBA All Star happened, and Chris Paul and Wemby did that little trickery to try to win the game. And then they like, you're disqualified. I was like, man, well, why? Like, that was. That's Chris Paul at his finest.

[B]

Yeah. Like, he read the rules.

[A]

He read the rules.

[B]

He figured out what he had to do. But it was an All Star game. But it was there to see.

[A]

Exactly. So then I thought about it and I was like, this is. That's right. They should have been disqualified because we're here to be entertained, right?

[B]

What is sports entertainment and especially All Star Weekend. Like, we're not here for anything other than, like, show me your skills.

[A]

Hello.

[B]

Hello.

[A]

So, like, show me your skills. Jaylen Herz under center, bro. I don't want to see a bunch of big pushing you around. Yeah, like, what?

[B]

It's rugby. It feels too much, like. And I. But I do respect that, like, the Eagles brought in, like, a rugby guy to teach them the proper formation to, like, do this. But why does no other team know how to do it?

[A]

That. Because they. Because they know that it's bullshit. They're like, yo, listen, if we did this in a high school game, everybody's dad would be waiting in a parking lot to beat our ass, you know, saying they would destroy black on black Chevy Tahoe. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's what would happen. Everybody knows this is bullshit. Everybody knows that's. Bro, if you're not from Philly, that's, you know, it's throw the ball. Have you running back hit a gap. You know what I'm saying? I coach peewees if you can't tell by my passion. And my kid plays left guard, so, like, I should be one of those guys. It's like, yeah, hell yeah. If you got a strong offensive line, you should use a touch push. Hell, no. That shit is cheap. As I also don't like kneeling. The football run a play.

[B]

I'm. Well, I run A play, bro.

[A]

You know, you. You. Are. You. Are you confident in your squad, bro? Run a play. Don't kneel the. Let my defense. Let my defense get a chance. You know what I'm saying? To strip the ball, punch it out. You know what I mean? Are you skilled? You know what I'm saying? Play the game. Let's play this shit till the clock run out.

[B]

This is a. It's a good mentality to have for a youth football coach, I think. I don't think kids should be kneeling the ball. That's why.

[A]

That's crazy.

[B]

But in pro football, kneel the ball, run the clock out.

[A]

Health reasons, whatever.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

You know, I don't know.

[B]

No one's gonna.

[A]

Let's expand the season of 82 games.

[B]

What are the hits like for the kids? Are they hitting?

[A]

They're not. They're hitting.

[B]

Yeah. For real hitting?

[A]

Yeah, they're hitting. But it's like, bro, when you're peewees, you don't have enough momentum behind you to really, like. Yeah, blow somebody up.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, they get blown up, but it's just like. Because their heads are bigger than their bodies. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Like, they're top heavy. Yeah.

[A]

My kid is a unit.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm saying, like, he's the third child. Third boy. Like, he's very big. Every time I take him, pediatrician, it's like, wow. He keeps saying, like. Like an old white dad phrase. Like, gee willikers. Like, get a load of this.

[B]

Goodness gracious.

[A]

Yeah, get a load of this kid. He's a piece. This kid's a. Pardon my language. This kid's a monster. He's gonna. What's he playing? He's playing left guard, defense, tackle. Yeah. What's his. What's a Celly? The sexy dexy. I love it. I love it. Keep at it, man. Keep at it. Champagne. Keep at it, champ. You're great.

[B]

All I think now when I hear you saying you have a big kid, I'm like, that's got to cost a lot to feed.

[A]

Hell, yeah.

[B]

Keep that kid.

[A]

This kid eats like. There's like a Dominican saying, like, yo, you eat like a duck. Because on a farm, if you just keep feeding a duck, they'll just keep eating and eating and eating and eating and eating and eating till they literally throw up. Oh, my God, he's like that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, he's just like, I want to eat. And he talks like that.

[B]

That's great.

[A]

Katie, I'm hungry. You have uncrustable.

[B]

Oh, my God, how many uncrustables in a sitting? 20. 20.

[A]

No number is too great, Katie.

[B]

You have to hide the box so he can't keep going back for more. The fact that they need to sit out and defrost is actually helpful because it puts a buffer between him and just housing uncrustables. Wow.

[A]

He would eat him. I've seen him try to bite a frozen one.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah. And I'm just like, yo, you can't. We don't do that in America, bro.

[B]

You can't be out here doing that. Has he ever tried to toast one? I've heard that's nice. If you put him directly in the toast one.

[A]

I was like, bro, this is horrible. Just let it sit in the little wicker basket.

[B]

In a wicker basket that mommy put there for you. Shout out, Mommy. Shout out, Mommy.

[A]

Shout the moms everywhere.

[B]

Do you hate that they. That it feels like the packers are like, so. I know you hate the tush push, but do you hate that the packers are, like, snitching? Yeah. It's like, they can't do it. So they're like, take it out of the game. I don't like it. Right.

[A]

That. I mean, like, going back to my ethos of youth football.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's like, bro, play the game.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Stop it. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Stop it. Or do it yourself.

[A]

Or do it yourself. Yeah. Oh, yeah. We're gonna do it on third and one. We're gonna do it on second and one. Yeah, we're gonna do it on first and, like. You know what I'm saying? First and one, which is not a.

[B]

Real thing, which would be crazy. How did we get here?

[A]

How did we get to first and one?

[B]

Sort of situation has led us to here. I can't even think.

[A]

Rex Ryan's feet are out.

[B]

God.

[A]

That's got something to do with it.

[B]

Oh, God. Yeah. I feel like if you're gonna ban it, because if it, like, causes injuries, then you show me the data, Right? That it causes injuries, and then maybe we'll ban it. Otherwise. Yeah, it's bad tv. Yeah. I don't like watching it.

[A]

It's. Boy, it's over and over. It's boring. Also, what made it exciting for me then they ruled out when they played the Commanders.

[B]

Yeah. And the jumping over.

[A]

The jumping over. The jumping over. That was entertaining.

[B]

Yes. Finding out that if they did that again, the ref was just gonna give them the touchdown. I was like, I didn't know we had that rule.

[A]

Did I Just make that. They just made that up.

[B]

They were like.

[A]

John, what do we do? I don't know. The simone guy keeps jumping over the pile. I don't know what to do. I don't. Katie, what do you think? Just keep a touchdown. Say if the Simone guy jumps one more time, we're gonna give him a touchdown. He's from Tonga. Just it, dude. The guy with the, you know, palomalo guy. Just say that. We're gonna. We're gonna give him a touchdown. If he does it again, that's it. All right. Break.

[B]

Yeah. It was the we'll turn this car around.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Of NFL rules.

[A]

Yeah. That was the little.

[B]

Do that one more time.

[A]

Hey, I swear to God, we won't.

[B]

Go to Disney World.

[A]

Which, by the way, I do. I never thought I would do, but I thought, hey, yeah, hey. It's a little different.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But it's not like, I'll turn this. It's like, hey, listen to me. I'm driving the car right now. We're going 80 miles an hour. If you. If I swerve, we're cooked. And my daughter's like, I mean, daddy drives crazy. I'm like, I don't drive crazy. I have super cruise on right now, actually. The computer driving.

[B]

You let the computer drive. I don't trust.

[A]

Nah. My hands are on the wheel. But, like, if I gotta, like, you know, get like a snack out of the console or.

[B]

Damn. You're gonna have a self driving car.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? No, no, no, no.

[B]

Not me.

[A]

Because I got in one in San Francisco and it was too creepy.

[B]

I don't like it. I. I feel like an old head. Very quickly.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

When this AI stuff started, I was like, no, no.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

No, no, no.

[A]

I'm like, yo, I felt the same way. And then I was just like, I could do all my kids homework with this.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So it's. It's been pretty useful. Yo, how many. How do. How do I. How many grams is a. Hey, whoa. For food measurements, of course. Yeah.

[B]

For a math problem.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I'm helping my child with.

[B]

That's what that little scale is for. We do science at the house. That's to see the.

[A]

With the ball jar. How much the ball jar weighs.

[B]

The big story that I want to talk to you about was this Steve Smith senior story.

[A]

Did you see, baby?

[B]

Did you see? This is the kind of sports talk you may only get on a show. Like, casual.

[A]

Yes. Let's get into it.

[B]

Okay, so on Saturday. On Saturday, former NFL wide receiver and current NFL Network analyst Steve Smith senior was accused of having an extramarital affair with a woman associated with the Baltimore Ravens marching band by someone who claimed to be her husband. So on Friday, an ex account replied to a video of Smith golfing with a straightforward question of whether his wife knew he was having an affair with the account owner's wife. These tweets have since been deleted.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

But so basically, Steve Smith posted a video of himself golfing, and this guy was like, does your wife know that you're sleeping with my wife?

[A]

My wife. And then he posted screenshots. He came with receipts, which is nuts, because, listen, you're in a relationship, I'm in a relationship. We speak to our partners in. In ways that are not meant to be public.

[B]

No.

[A]

You know what I'm saying?

[B]

In good and bad ways. Lots of ways that are like, you just aren't supposed to take this slice of life of our convo. Right.

[A]

This is a.

[B]

It shouldn't see the light of day.

[A]

Never.

[B]

And truly, I think if it saw the light of day, I would be, like, so mortified. I think I would go into hiding for a hundred percent if you saw me dirty talk. But here's my thing with this story. So it's. We're not. I'm not gonna read the texts. And I. I think you can look them up online. They're the. The original tweets are deleted, but I'm sure somebody has them. Screenshot. Come on, go look them up. Because I'm not saying these words out loud, especially not to a friend in their is face. I can't. I'm not. None of these words are text. Never ever.

[A]

Not the Bible, not the Quran, not the Torah. None of these words are in any of these.

[B]

You're. If you're committing a. A secret deed, if you're going behind someone's back to do something sneaky, stop writing it down. Like, a voice note will do you wonders in this situation because they disappear.

[A]

Yo, to quote Tornado and Savage, I DM in vanish mode. I do that a lot.

[B]

You know, I've accidentally turned my DMS into vanish mode sometimes, and I don't know how to unvanish them. Like, I think I just pull on it sometimes when I'm like, thinking of what to say and I. All of a sudden it'll be like, you're in vanish mode. And then I start to feel like, am I doing something bad?

[A]

Be shady.

[B]

But yes, this stuff Exists. Like the ability to hide it all.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Exists. This is lazy.

[A]

Or also, yo, y'all, these are not young people.

[B]

Steve Smith Sr. Not young.

[A]

Is not a young man. Like, yo, just talk with your mouth.

[B]

Right?

[A]

You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Right?

[A]

Like, what are we doing?

[B]

It also, I would say, and maybe I'm wrong, but I think whatever they were saying to each other sounds better in audio than reading it. Whenever I read words that you only really say to each other written down, it never makes me go like, oh, yeah. It makes me go like, oh, that's what it looks like in daylight.

[A]

Damn, Adam Levine. You really said that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? It's like eating a lasagna versus reading the recipe tool.

[B]

Yes. Where you're like, oh, it's that many layers of cheese and God. Oh, my God.

[A]

How do you say, Is it ragut? Is that how you say it?

[B]

That a beshamel? What? Oh, my God.

[A]

No. I need a lactate just reading this shit.

[B]

Yeah, that was.

[A]

That was something nasty.

[B]

Real, real nasty.

[A]

Freaky, man.

[B]

As of now, Steve Smith Sr. Has not issued any public. Public statement addressing the allegations. Did he Won't. He won't. You don't think so? Did Shannon Sharp address when he had sex on live?

[A]

Yeah, he made a joke out of it. He's like, oh. He like, you know, I'd like to have sex sometimes. You know, I'm a sexually active man.

[B]

Getting on live is so difficult to do that. That doesn't make sense to me.

[A]

That's what I'm saying.

[B]

Steps you had to take.

[A]

Hey, hey, hey, hey. Whenever my social media people are like, yo, you got to post a story, and I just go automatically click into Instagram, and it just throws me on the reels. Yeah, listen, I don't know what's going on. I'm 40 years old.

[B]

Yeah, this stuff moves fast. Now. I don't understand. Most of it updates.

[A]

My iOS just updated.

[B]

I don't know where any of my emails disappeared.

[A]

What is going on?

[B]

I got a thou. I had, like, a comically large amount of email.

[A]

Like, the little badge was like, 180,776.

[B]

Then I update my phone, and it said 1,200. And I was like, what happened? Where'd they go?

[A]

Where's all my Neiman Marcus offers?

[B]

Right.

[A]

That's never open.

[B]

Here's my thing. That's now none of my business.

[A]

I don't care.

[B]

It kind of took it off my shoulders.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

I was like, oh, those emails are gone.

[A]

I don't care.

[B]

I hope whoever sent them understands.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They'll reach out if they really needed it.

[A]

Right. It's in a whole other, like. It's like in a garbage can.

[B]

Yeah. It's not for me to know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I don't care if you tell me that something I need is in there. I can go digging.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

But I don't need to look in there until that time comes.

[A]

So straight up, like, yo, your. Your loyalty reward program thing is in. It might have went into your span. Oh, okay. Let me go check.

[B]

Let me find it.

[A]

I got it. Yeah, back into. Oh, mom sent me this thing. A picture of the kids.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm. Now I'm in the regular world.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Email.

[B]

So thank you, iOS, for getting those emails out of my face.

[A]

So now I just see job offers and when. You know, when we're playing Ridgewood.

[B]

Job offers.

[A]

Yeah. Shout out.

[B]

Congratulations.

[A]

Yeah, congratulations. Good job.

[B]

Good job.

[A]

You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Speaking of Stephen Smith's hustling, this was a story I was not gonna give any oxygen to because I hate it. But I do think you might have a good take on it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

ESPN personality Stephen A. Smith running for president. That's in 2028.

[A]

Cut it out. Yo, shut up. Yo, America, look, look, yo, look at me. Look at me. America, listen to me, man. We if. Enough, man. Like, this is dad talking now. This is not the kid Mero talking. This is the dad Meryl talking. Yeah, enough. Y'all been around enough. Yo, you went on the trampoline. You broke it. You went in the thing.

[B]

You.

[A]

You broke the neighbor's window with the. With the baseball, dog. Y'all are around too much. It's time to go inside and take a shower, you know what I mean? And sit in your room. You could play on your iPad for 30 minutes max. Okay, America, enough. Y'all are running around crazy. Yeah, the playroom is a mess. You know what I'm saying? The foyer. I keep the. Y'all broke the roomba. You know what I mean? So that is footprints all over the fucking foyer. America, you're going crazy. Stop. Okay? We look crazy. The neighbors are looking at us crazy. They're opening the windows just to hear what we're doing over here. Just the truth, dog. Guy has won the open. Like, ooh, they going crazy. Damn. What they doing over there? We look crazy. Stop. We're fucking cooked. There was. Yo, fam. I never in my life. I'm 40 years old, Katie. Yeah, I keep saying that.

[B]

I don't know why it's important.

[A]

It's important.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I never, in four decades of living in this world, bro, I never seen a AI video of a man eating another man's feet in the halls of a federal building. There's so much saliva coming out of my mouth because I'm passionate about this. Y'all stop. We're fucking cooked. I want to get that tattooed on my neck. So every time I want to say it, I just gotta go like this.

[B]

That's so funny.

[A]

We're cooked.

[B]

We're cooked. There's a predictions market that has Stephen A. Smith listed as the fourth best to become the Democratic Party's 2020. I like that we're still assuming there's going to be a 2028 election of any sort. I love. We're still keeping that idea alive.

[A]

Very optimistic.

[B]

Very optimistic.

[A]

I'll be watching from Punta Cana.

[B]

Stephen A. Smith is the same, basically the same odds as Pete Buddha, Judge Aoc and Gretchen Whitmer to be the Dem nominee. This is nuts. This is somebody being good at what they do and. And us assuming that that translates. It's. We got it. Why? Where do we get that idea?

[A]

Where did that.

[B]

Those skills are applicable to this other gig?

[A]

Help.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Help.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Help. That's like, yo. Somebody being like. Yeah, that's like you being like, yo, Meryl. You know what? You're very funny. I want you to deliver my baby. What? How the. I don't know. I don't know how to do that. I've seen it done four times.

[B]

Four. Oh, by a professional, of course. Yeah.

[A]

Not me.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. You never had like a scary.

[A]

That's what I did.

[B]

Oh, good.

[A]

That's what I did. And then hold the hand.

[B]

Yeah. Well, famously, you did the first thing too. You made it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You didn't make.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? Shot the club up about. You know what I'm saying? You know, I mean, got it got all up in that cervix. But yeah, hit the bottom.

[B]

Stephen A. Smith is president. I just.

[A]

It's crazy.

[B]

I just. I also Democrat. Since when? Stephen A. Smith, a Democrat.

[A]

That part also. Imagine having a debate.

[B]

He'd crush.

[A]

He would crush a debate. And that would crush me. Because then it would be like, yo, we have a guy who wears a comically large cowboy hat whenever the cowboys lose.

[B]

Struts into the studio.

[A]

Struts into the studio. And he's the president now. But you know, that you failed guy is the president.

[B]

I Mean, it's like, I wish we could go back to when president was, like, a boring guy.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Nobody. Like a boring lady may. I'd be fine with as well. But a boring guy who just. Who just does the boring. The pay is good at paperwork, knows how the government works. Gets like. I just wish it could go back to being somebody that I don't care about. I don't want to talk about.

[A]

You have no personality. I don't care.

[B]

I don't want everybody that I'm in a call of duty lobby with to have his. The. The president's name as their clan tag. Like, what are we doing now he's president? That's like saying, I love the teacher. I love the teacher so much. Like, come on.

[A]

I love Ms. Johnson. Oh, my God. Ms. Johnson's the best.

[B]

Go back to that. Being lame and not something I have to think about, like culture and politics. I would love to be separate again.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? Get him out of here.

[B]

It's an old time. It's back the way it used to be when things were right.

[A]

So you said you want to make America great again.

[B]

Oh, my God. I reach under my seat, I pull out a red hat. Oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Yo, listen, man. I want to just go into, like, a H and R block and grab a woman or flip a coin.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You know, man, Woman don't care. Just come here, pencil skirt. You look very intelligent. Come here. You're the president now.

[B]

You're the president.

[A]

You. I don't give a shit what you got going on.

[B]

Who was it that said that the only person qualified to be president, you'd have to drag them kicking and screaming into the office? I want that back. I want a person who doesn't want to be president because they know it would be really hard suck. But they go and they do it because they know how to do it properly. Can we go back? Are we past that? I think we're. I don't think that's ever coming back. Nah, I think we're just.

[A]

We're in the American Idol final phase.

[B]

So cool.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? So I'm voting for Max B. You know what I'm saying? Next. Next election. I don't know.

[B]

I'm writing you in. So, hey, be prepared.

[A]

At least I'm getting two votes.

[B]

While we're talking about going back to things, being great again, are you watching college basketball? We're coming up on March, so, like, it's time to start caring. St. John's is good again. The seventh. Seventh winningest program in college basketball history is on the rise once again. Rick Patino's St. John's Red Storm is now ranked number seven in the country. And over the next week, they have a chance to do something the program hasn't done since 1985. Clinch the big east title outright. How are you feeling as a New York guy who loves basketball?

[A]

I'm a New York. I love basketball. Also, very notable, Red Storm alumni, Felipe Lopez Dominicano.

[B]

Yeah, papi.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? So. Yeah, so I'm very well versed, you know what I'm saying? Felipe had the whole city in a chokehold, you know what I'm saying? But the Red Storm, Queens, you know, I mean, New York City. And Rick Patino.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Who. I don't know why he wears eyeliner, but.

[B]

But let him do it. You know, it's working. Helps him see.

[A]

Hell, yeah.

[B]

It's like eye black, but a little too close to the eye. Too close.

[A]

Right? It's literal eye black. It's in his eyes.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

But. But, yo, he listen. That's why people always, like, yo, why do they fire the coach first in, like, sports when, like, the team is doing bad? Because when the coach is good and they come in to the mix, like a guy like Rick Pitino, it's like, hey, I don't. Listen. Your past may be checkered, but you know how to coach basketball, dog.

[B]

So Rick pitino, obviously, in 2017, in. @ Louisville. Louisville had the Atmosphere Models coming through. There was a. He had, like, a lack of oversight over some sort of a scandal with Atmosphere models. Atmosphere models, you know, like, lady ladies of the call. Yeah, there were some girls on the call.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, right? We talk about Doris Burke. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Shout out, Doris. Shout out to DB The Queen. But, yeah, you know, he. And now he's here, and he's doing fine.

[A]

Now he's doing his thing.

[B]

Right.

[A]

He's moved past that.

[B]

And so this big St. John's hasn't made a sweet 16 since 99.

[A]

God damn.

[B]

Which to me feels like a couple years ago, but I guess was 26. 26 years ago.

[A]

You know what's crazy? People say, yo, the 90s. And I'm like, yeah, that was, like.

[B]

20 years ago, right? It wasn't.

[A]

It was not. It was not narrator. It was not disgusting. I interviewed Will Smith and Martin Lawrence for the. For the Bad Boys, the New.

[B]

Very cool. That's very cool.

[A]

Yeah. And I was just like, yeah, I was like, yo, when the first one came out in like two that they were like, this came out in 1995. I was like. I was like, I gotta get. I gotta get up and leave. I can't be wearing a Supreme T shirt at my age.

[B]

Oh, my God. I know. We're old.

[A]

It's crazy.

[B]

They're all wearing the kids now. We're wearing what we wore. It's crazy. It's.

[A]

I don't understand why.

[B]

I don't understand what Tyrese Halliburton dressed like that.

[A]

What?

[B]

Yeah. I don't know. I don't know what type of. What type of pants I'm supposed to be wearing.

[A]

I don't even know.

[B]

At this age.

[A]

I get nervous cuz I'm like. The cool pants now are very, very, very big.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And for women, y'all have always had, like a kind of like, that style.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Different styles of pants for dudes. I feel like there's been, like, two styles of pants in the last 100 years.

[B]

And like, a decision that you make in regards to what pants you want to wear also says a lot about how old you think you are or how. And you don't want to look like. Like you think you're in your 20s, but you're also like, these are. These are the pants I want to wear. I want to wear pants. Why do my pants have to say so much about me as a person? Can't they just be what covers my ass?

[A]

That's it.

[B]

Can't they just be.

[A]

Can't it just be pants?

[B]

Can they just be pants? They're what keep me separate from the world. Nah, they don't have to be such a statement. We have similar, actually pants on. As I'm saying this. Yours are cool, neutral tones. Yours are cooler. Your outfit's a lot cooler than mine. His jacket. I don't know if you saw the Prada jacket.

[A]

I don't even know.

[B]

Yeah, I didn't even know.

[A]

Yeah, I just. Yo, I keep it a. I keep it a buck. You know how I. With you? Like, we go back like a durag flap, and I like this. I picked this up just like. You know what I mean?

[B]

What does that mean?

[A]

Just.

[B]

I picked this up. Okay.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

Casual. Just a casual Prada jacket. Fine. Fine and normal. Certainly not what you were wearing back when we first were hanging out.

[A]

Listen, I mean, listen, I was. I just use something. I just use Helena Rubenstein's credit card to get it.

[B]

I will say I put on a. I got my first pair of, like, designer jeans. I had a pair of Prada jeans. I put them on, and I was like, oh, this is how jeans are supposed to fit. Like, this is what it's supposed to look like. I looked at myself in those jeans and was like, oh, but they're so expensive.

[A]

Yeah, you say I did in the mirror.

[B]

I looked, and I went, bitch, poke it out to the point where, you know, when you, like, grow out of pants and you, like, get rid. I'm keeping them forever. I was like, I'm never gonna get rid of these pants. I will hopefully fit back in the.

[A]

Sisterhood of the traveling pants.

[B]

I will pass these down to someone. Unfortunately, I mean, I didn't pay for them. They came from a wardrobe budget for a job that I had, and I was like, this rules.

[A]

Ain't that. Ain't that. Ain't that the shit?

[B]

The best. I just wish they weren't pink. They gave me these pink jeans. I'm like, if these were just jean jeans, I could wear them all the time. But I have pink Prada jeans.

[A]

Listen, Hamptons is calling.

[B]

Yeah. When you see me in them, shut up. Tell me they look good, and shut up.

[A]

Don't say nothing.

[B]

Hooters is closing.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, duh, right? Porn is on the Internet, guy.

[B]

I know.

[A]

You know what I'm saying?

[B]

If I want to eat wings and look at boobs, I can see full nip.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

If I just sit at my laptop.

[A]

Open my laptop and get the same.

[B]

But we're losing the recipes, the going to the Hooters, the seeing, the, like. Oh, my God, look at those. Whoa. What's in there?

[A]

Yo, That's.

[B]

The younger generation just doesn't have that at all.

[A]

They don't care. They're gooners. Are you familiar?

[B]

Unfortunately, I am familiar with the term Hooters.

[A]

Worked back in the day because there wasn't such easy access to Pino.

[B]

I know.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? Like, I had. I had. Yeah. That's short for porno. Yeah.

[B]

I learned that on your show. Like, live on your show. I remember being like, are you guys talking about wine?

[A]

No, no, no. Not Pino, Grio.

[B]

Not Pino.

[A]

Pino. You know what I'm saying? Yeah.

[B]

So kids these days.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

We're those people now, right? You know?

[A]

Well. Right. So. Yeah. Damn.

[B]

Kids these days. Kids these days have too much porn.

[A]

It's too much easy, and it's too easy to get to. So it was like, back in the day. Like, I remember the first porn I saw.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You. That's crazy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

My kids are not gonna remember the first porn they saw. They saw that by accident probably. You know what I mean? Like, scrolling through a tick tock. Like, oh, shit, I just saw a dick. Like, oh, my God. Oops. You know what I mean?

[B]

Oops. When you're on Twitter now.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You're like, oh, this is. I'm in the replies to this reading. An argument about why Stephen A. Smith shouldn't be president. And then I'm like, oh, I'm looking at. I'm looking at porn. This is a full porn.

[A]

Yeah, full graphic.

[B]

Like, it look full.

[A]

Yeah. 28 minutes, full scene.

[B]

I didn't even know we could upload videos that long.

[A]

You know what I'm saying?

[B]

When did that happen?

[A]

How long does it take? That's dedication.

[B]

Devin Booker pled for Hooters to not go. He tweeted. I think it was just like, please don't go Hooters.

[A]

Don't go.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

That's crazy.

[B]

Kevin Love tweet posted a bunch of pictures of him as a kid. Like, at Hooters. At Hooters. Growing up through the years at Hooters. It's a sad. It's sad.

[A]

I mean, I. Yeah, I mean, like, it's sad that there's. Those jobs will be lost.

[B]

Yes. What will those women do now? I mean, they were probably already on only fans. I feel like if you've got the boobs to be a Hooters, I think they should just rebrand. I think it was too top heavy. I think we shifted to a lot of, like, lower. Exactly.

[A]

Booters.

[B]

That's exact. You took the word right out of my mouth. Hooters.

[A]

This is here.

[B]

Or even if. If we need to go 2008, you know, instead of 2000 and late. I feel like you could go, like, you could go Cooters. Cooters is maybe we get out ahead.

[A]

Of it with the crazy.

[B]

Just you do a front G string.

[A]

Yo, yo, Katie.

[B]

I'm just spitballing, okay? No bad ideas in a brainstorm. But you go in, spit, spitball. You go get a wing, and you look at front butt.

[A]

Front butt is crazy. I don't know.

[B]

Welcome to Cooters.

[A]

Imagine. Yo, I don't want to know what's in that blue cheese. You know what I'm saying? Like, if that's what we doing. Buddhas, I feel like makes more sense. Everybody's about ass now.

[B]

I mean, they made those poor women have their asses out anyway. They always had those shiny tights, those Sabrina Carpenter tights. They did with the orange shorts.

[A]

Yeah. But it wasn't like a meritocracy with the ass.

[B]

Yeah, you're right.

[A]

It was a lot of, like, your.

[B]

Boobs could get you in the door.

[A]

Right.

[B]

But you did have to have your ass out no matter how it ranked on the scale of 1 to 10, which is crazy. Crazy.

[A]

It's like, dog. If you just have a lot of vertebrae back there.

[B]

Yeah. You know, you have a famously long back. Hey, I don't want to get you back in trouble again, but I do remember that. That CVS receipt controversy and how mad they were at you.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

I mean, you pissed them off before people knew that. They were like an army of people that you couldn't piss off.

[A]

I. I realized that very quickly. I was like, y'all are.

[B]

Y'all are not to be with.

[A]

Yeah. This is not a. Just a couple of people.

[B]

The 50s. Okay, so RIP Hooters. That's from both of us. We got you. We loved you.

[A]

Peace.

[B]

Yo, I've eaten there probably twice.

[A]

Yeah, same. Yeah, on, like, a road trip.

[B]

The wings were okay.

[A]

Yeah. It was a matter of the wings.

[B]

I liked them because if you get them mild, which I do because I'm a big baby, they just add more butter to the sauce, and so they're just like, buttery ass wings. I like that. I really like that quite a bit. But unfortunately, it's gone. All right, now we gotta go to.

[A]

Magic City for wings.

[B]

Yeah. We have a new segment this called Hot Mic.

[A]

Oh, shit.

[B]

These are a couple times over the last week or so that people have been caught saying things on a hot mic. It's a really inventive segment. It's like the name doesn't give too much of it away, and I like that. All right, so our first one that we have was a young baseball fan heard during a spring training game earlier this week heckling Mets pitcher Danny Young. Do we have that audio? Let's roll it. That was none of those. Those are bad pitches.

[A]

Those are bad pitches. None of those. Those are bad pitches.

[B]

Those are bad pitches. Good feedback.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, good feedback.

[A]

Good in real time.

[B]

Good feedback. That's saying you don't have the command of that pitch today.

[A]

Yeah, you don't got it today.

[B]

Let's. Let's switch to maybe the curveball.

[A]

You know what?

[B]

Because you don't have your command on this today.

[A]

Shout out to her.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because if Mel Stadelmeyer would have came out and told you the same shit, you would have. You would have listened, you would have.

[B]

Gone, wow, that's really. Actually, if somebody came out to the. To the mound, that saved you a mound visit.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

No more of that.

[A]

No delay game.

[B]

Those are bad.

[A]

Those suck.

[B]

Stop doing that.

[A]

Not working today, champ.

[B]

All right, our next.

[A]

No, moving on a fastball stop.

[B]

Our next one was Buffalo Sabres announcer Rob Ray got hit by a puck in the first period of the Sabres clash against the Rangers this week.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Let's take a listen.

[A]

Puck is dropped. And it's. For now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love that.

[B]

Sick.

[A]

I love that. Because, I mean, you know, we're sports fans.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

We watch Sports Casuals. All those guys are like. And Jack Hughes brings the puck up the ice. Pass, center ice, slap shot. When they break.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they turn into real people. I love it.

[B]

It's fantastic. I love. I love like, a genuine. Like that hurt. That sucks. I'm on tv. This is gonna bleed. I'm at my job. It was so just like. It was like, cathartic for the viewer.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And especially Sabers fans. I'm sure they're not very good.

[A]

They are not.

[B]

But that was. I also just love, like a. At the ice level, a reporter. Like, I love like a. Like a sideline. It's like when a sideline reporter gets hit with a football. That's funny.

[A]

It's funny.

[B]

It's funny. It's funnier. If they say, and now he looks all like, mangle. He got, like, really up.

[A]

Yeah. Listen, if that was ufc, they would have been like, yo, tko.

[B]

Yeah, that's it. He's got to go.

[A]

But he's got to go.

[B]

Still doing his job.

[A]

He's still leaking.

[B]

Pretty amazing. This was last week or whenever the All Star. That was last week. Right.

[A]

Also real quick.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If I'm at a Buffalo Sabres game.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like you said, they're not great.

[B]

Right.

[A]

If I get hit by a puck, I'm probably out.

[B]

I'd go for the week. I'd actually take the rest of the week. I'd use it as an excuse.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Get out of here.

[B]

I'd be like, I'm going to island.

[A]

In the booth, man. Get me out of here.

[B]

I have to go. Someone else can do this.

[A]

I'm concussed.

[B]

Last week, during allstar, Shaq was heard at the end of the broadcast. Caught on a hot mic. Let's listen to this.

[A]

Oh, man. In the words of Mar Marshall, I'm tired of America. We're just getting fired anyway.

[B]

Er, it great. We're getting fired anyway, Ernie. It Wow.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

I love Unhinged. The NBA crew unhinged. Just going like, well, we're done. So.

[A]

No, let's go. Let's. Yeah, let's just go like, yo, balls to the wall. Like, yo, man, that. That's a special crew.

[B]

Yeah, it was really something. It was lightning in a bottle.

[A]

Yo, Ernie. Shout out to Ernie Johnson, bro. Cuz I saw Ernie Johnson wearing, like, the Space Jam Michael Jordans at the sports Emmys, and I was like, damn, dog, those. Are those Mike's actual shoes because from the film. Huge. Yeah.

[B]

He's got big feet already.

[A]

Got big ass feet.

[B]

He does.

[A]

Yeah. I didn't even know that.

[B]

I didn't know that either.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? You would think it was Shaq.

[B]

You would think. I bet Shaqs are probably still bigger. They have to be.

[A]

Puts a Buick on each foot, a.

[B]

Buick lacrosse, a Chevy towel, a black.

[A]

I let him say on my hot.

[B]

Mic, we have one more on a hot mic, because why not? Aunt Edwards, after the Timberwolves overtime win against the Thunder last night, they came back and he said this. Gentlemen, gentlemen, we're on live now. We're on live. Hey, guys.

[A]

Hey. I love what the report is like. We're live, okay?

[B]

So see the microphone in the camera? People can hear you.

[A]

Yeah, people can hear you. You say motherfucker you. Yeah. And then they're just like, I don't give a. Yeah. Double down is my favorite.

[B]

Yeah, I get it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because you're like, I just did that. I'm him. I.

[A]

What the. You mean? Yeah, I say that after I make a peanut butter and jelly and I cut the crust perfectly for my daughter, I'm like, what the. You mean I'm him? Who else is doing PBJs like this? Nobody. Get the out of here, y'all. Crazy dad of the year. Not contender number one. Crusty.

[B]

Mom ain't got diagonals like this.

[A]

Nah, you bugging Mom. Leaves a little bit of the crust on, and you'd be like, daddy gets it with the kitchenaid scissor.

[B]

What do you do with the crust? Do you eat it or you throw it out?

[A]

I eat that shit.

[B]

Of course.

[A]

I put so much peanut butter and jelly on the kids sandwiches that it leaks out. So then I eat the crust, and it's like a. It's like a biscotti.

[B]

Fancy boy, fancy boy with your chains on. It's like a biscotti. That's mostly it, Mira. We don't really have much else to say. I. Oh, you know what? I did want to know before I let. Did you. Hockey kind of caught a lot of people last week. A lot of people were like, way into hockey. Did it. Did you catch any of that? Yeah. You liked?

[A]

I loved it. That last game, that USA Canada game.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Going into overtime. Yo, I was like, God damn. And also like, listen, as a Dominican, I go, I've said that shit 10 times. You could do a super cut of me saying that shit with the World Baseball Classic comes around.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The best it is like, yo, it's my time to play.

[B]

It rules. It really rules.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because it's like, I look, first of all, I looked at the lineup for the 2026, like, Dominican team, and I'm like, ho.

[B]

Yeah. It's a lot. It's stacked.

[A]

Whoa. You know what I mean? Like, holy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? Like, when I love Gary Sanchez, man, I wasn't going to disparage you on live, on air, you know what I'm saying?

[B]

He was about to. I think he looked like he was about to.

[A]

I almost did because they were like, at catcher, we have this guy and, And. And Gary Sanchez. And I was like, okay.

[B]

Oh, well, that's every position can be. That's.

[A]

It's okay. What.

[B]

Do you think that hockey format can teach the NBA anything?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Terms of All Star.

[A]

Yes. Like, well, first of all, stop around with allstar.

[B]

Yeah. Like, you're doing too much.

[A]

Yeah. Like, stop around. Stop tinkering.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, stop. It's not a. It's not like, it is a media product, but it's not a TV show, bro.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Where you're like, oh, let's replace an Viv and see how the. The audience response. We didn't respond well, you know what I'm saying? But like, dog, we don't need all this shit.

[B]

The Kevin Hart stuff.

[A]

Don't need it.

[B]

Don't need it.

[A]

You know what? Do it on Friday.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Do all the crazy shit on Friday.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Experiment on Friday.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Saturday. Have the new guys, the new talent, whatever, you know what I'm saying? Like, woo, woo, woo. Whatever. Sunday is like the Lord's day.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? Where Kevin Durant and LeBron James and Stephen Curry don their uniforms of their franchises with the patch that says east or west, depending on their conference delineation. And they play basketball at a high level, you know what I'm saying? That's what I used to watch as a kid.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Going hard. Didn't Kobe break somebody's nose? Or Kobe Got his nose broken in.

[B]

Like, a nose broke in Kobe's vicinity.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

During All Star recipes.

[B]

How do you get them to care about it like that again, though? Like, it doesn't. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, I don't know. Like. Like, be like, yo. Because kd, he had like, an interview where he got, like, emotional. He was just like, yo, bro. Like, you know, I'm. And it's true. He might be one of the last people to be like, yo, I. I'm coming from, like, the hood, bro. I'm coming out of the mud. Like, yeah, I had to make. I had to make it right. Like, it's like now it's like. But even my kids, like, if my kids make it in sports, it's just like, yeah, of course we made it in Sports, bro. Jason McCourty was like your part of the coaching staff. Like, of course you made it, dog. Like, you have a remote control dummy in peewees. You know what I mean? Like, I was. I was like, my ladder drill was like not stepping on glass. There was no ladder. It was just like, glass. Like, yo, don't step on the glass.

[B]

I was just trying to get to practice.

[A]

Yeah. You know what I'm saying? That was the ladder drill. Practice, not stepping on a needle. But yeah, it's like, you know, I don't know where I was going with that, but it was just like, you.

[B]

Know, it's getting them to care about the.

[A]

Yeah, that part. I think it has to be organic and you can get guys that care. They might not be like the super A list megastars, but like, they will give a. Yeah, I mean, there's always like the.

[B]

The like the Mac McClungs who give a. About the dunk contest.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? But like, even like above him, like, in that, like, there's tears of NBA guys, you know what I mean? There's like the KD, LeBron and then there's like that next tier. You're telling me if you put John Moran in an all star game, he's not dunking on everybody. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So make it happen.

[B]

Make it happen NBA. Get the guys who want to play the game and let them play the game. That's what you think. That's your.

[A]

Hire me to consult and I'll give you more ideas.

[B]

It's. Email him, but if he doesn't answer, it's in. It's in a weird inbox. So email him again.

[A]

Right?

[B]

And then he'll get Back to you. I promise. He does want the job. He does want the job. He'll take it. It's even got a lot of kids to feed.

[A]

It's so many. I like, I always say, I got four kids and two mortgages, you know, I'm saying we are here getting it.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

Yeah, but I was. Dumb thing. These. These were purchased way after. Yeah, all this shiny.

[B]

You do have a lot of shiny.

[A]

On it was after. Yeah, it was like, bro, you got. You got a house. You house. You got a thing in Dr. Yeah. You got a portfolio, which, by the way, they do not teach us that in school.

[B]

That should be the only thing we learn at this point, how to, like, do stocks and portfolios and taxes. Like, instead they teach you about, like, low growth. Remember when we had to learn about, like, compounding interest? I was like, this doesn't feel as important as learning literally anything else about math.

[A]

Come on.

[B]

Thanks, school. But that's okay. School's not allowed anymore. So actually we're getting rid of school.

[A]

Yeah, It.

[B]

So great. Everything's fixed, right?

[A]

We are the last generation to know what the Pythagorean theorem is. You're welcome.

[B]

And it's. That's the A squared plus B squared equals C squared. That's right. Absolutely right. Miro, thank you for being here.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

It was so good to see you.

[A]

Reunited and it feels so good. If you want to have a good time, go check her out of old video. We did a long time. Because I said we've been like this since garbage time.

[B]

Yeah, a long time. It's like 10 years ago.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's disgusting.

[A]

Yeah, long time. So, yeah, I'm. I'm a fan. I'm. I love watching you do your thing.

[B]

Shut up. I'm saying same to you.

[A]

And. And we're both doing our thing, God damn it.

[B]

Doing our best casuals.

[A]

Victory Light, you know what I'm saying?

[B]

Victory light. And what? 7pm in Brooklyn.

[A]

7Pm in Brooklyn with Carmelo Anthony, you know?

[B]

Ever heard of him?

[A]

Come on. He's a guy. He played a lot of basketball, scored a lot of points, you know what I'm saying? In a New York uniform.

[B]

And that's your friend now.

[A]

It's the homie, so that's cool.

[B]

I'm so glad I got to see him and I got to share that with you guys. Love him. Love that. Before we go, it's Tuesday, so, you know, we end this podcast by telling you what to watch this week. Lovely producer Chris. What have we got on the docket for this week.

[C]

Well, the first thing that I think everyone should keep an eye out for this week is the fact that the IndyCar season is beginning this weekend. So on Sunday at 12pm Eastern on Fox, you can watch the Grand Prix of St. Petersburg. So make sure you check that one out. You can watch that on Fox or you can listen to it on SiriusXM IndyCar Nation, channel 218 as well.

[B]

Two stupid questions. Number one, Russia.

[C]

No, Florida.

[B]

Ah, okay.

[C]

Thank you for clarifying.

[B]

Makes more sense. Second stupid question. What makes an IndyCar an IndyCar? What's the defining. What makes it different than, like, a stock car or say, F1? For anybody who doesn't know racing, it's.

[C]

Similar to F1 in the fact that it's an open wheel car. So if you have a look at a stock car like a nascar, the wheels are sort of tucked underneath and it's very chunky. Whereas Indycar looks a lot like F1s. It goes faster than a NASCAR. It actually goes faster than a Formula 1 car as well. At least on the straights. It's just a bit slower around the corners. F1 cars are faster around the corners, so it's built a little bit differently. The engineering is a little bit different. But it's really fun racing. They race both on road courses, street courses, circuits. If you haven't gotten into IndyCar yet, I highly suggest it. I think racing as a whole in this country is starting to grow. Obviously. I think that stems from the growth of Formula one, specifically from Drive to Survive, the Netflix series. So if people have found themselves getting into F1 through drive to survive, check out IndyCar. Check out the local product. A lot of good drivers.

[B]

If you had to name. If you had to name one driver that people could root for.

[C]

Willpower.

[B]

Willpower.

[C]

Yep. His name is Australian Willpower. Who's got the best name in racing.

[B]

That's sick. I. I'm always rooting for Willpower. It doesn't often pull through, but I am always rooting for it.

[C]

He's Australian, so it's.

[B]

Oh, this is an inside job.

[C]

And he's also good, but he's also. He's one of the best, best drivers on the grid.

[B]

Okay. On the grid.

[C]

Has a great name.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Is Australian Ticks. All the boxes.

[B]

Yeah, all your boxes.

[C]

We're all Willpower fans.

[B]

I feel indoctrinated. All right, what else are we watching? Oh, this one's tonight.

[C]

The next one is tonight at 10pm We've got the Mavericks at the Lakers. This is Luka Doncic playing against his old team for the first time since the Mavs ridiculously traded him for having too much Arnold Palmer.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I guess it's crazy because Arnold Palmer's are delicious and they're not always bad for you. If you're taking an unsweetened iced tea and you're putting lemonade in it, it's not.

[A]

One of the reports that came out after Luca was traded from the Mavs was that the front office said we were worried about him because we caught him putting Arnold Palmers in his water bottle during practice. And we told him liquid calories are death.

[C]

Yeah, great reason to trade your franchise player. One of the best, if not the best young player in the league. Great job, Matt.

[B]

Because of liquid calories. Truly ridiculous.

[C]

So make sure to watch that. He could go off tonight. That's at 10pm Eastern on TNT. And also you can listen on SiriusXM, NBA radio, channel 86.

[B]

What a good company, man Chris is letting you know where on Sirius you can find it. I love that.

[C]

It took me 11 episodes to figure out that I should be plugging SiriusXM as well.

[B]

But you got there and that's all that matters. I wish this game was happening in Dallas. It's not. So it's not as, I think, intense as it could be, but it is their first time meeting since everybody's playing, right? Nobody's not playing that was involved in that trade.

[C]

I. I checked. Well, Anthony Davis isn't playing because Anthony Davis is injured, but Luke is. Luka's playing as of. I checked about half an hour ago. He's. He's still listed as playing, so that's going to be exciting. I just wish it wasn't at 10pm because that's.

[B]

10Pm is late. It is late, but, you know, stay up, have a night, make a night of it.

[A]

Luca plays in Dallas. He's going to get a bigger cheer than any of the Dallas players.

[C]

Oh, 100%.

[B]

Yeah. It's going to just be fun. I just love any of those where you're like, oh, let's see how this goes. Real human moment of like, this could go anyway. Okay. And then the third thing, this is kind of a big one. Yeah.

[C]

The Academy Awards are also on on Sunday. That's at 7pm Eastern on ABC. Conan O'Brien is hosting the event. Yeah. One of the biggest events on the pop culture calendar each year. I haven't made. Made it through as many movies as I would have liked this year just because it's just been so tough to watch a lot of them. Most of these movies are not available on streaming service, which makes it very difficult for me to watch. But there's still, you know, there's still some intrigue there. There's still a lot of things I'll be. I'll be looking out for. Like, the best picture race is still well and surely open. And Nora won the. The Producer Guild Award and the Director's Guild Award, but then Conclave won the BAFTA and sag, so that one's pretty much tied. Don't know who's gonna come out. I've seen Conclave. Haven't seen a Nora yet. I would like to see a Nora.

[B]

But it's streaming. Isn't it?

[C]

Very hard to watch. You have to. You have to rent that one, huh?

[B]

Boo.

[C]

Yeah. But Conclave's on Peacock, so if you want to watch Conclave.

[B]

I didn't know Peacock had movies like that. I didn't.

[C]

Yeah. So make sure. Yep. You can check out Conclave. Might be a good primer as well for what's about to take place in the Vatican and probably the next few weeks, the way that Pope Francis. Health is looking.

[B]

Yeah. Pope Fax. He's not doing too well.

[C]

Not doing too well at the moment. But after watching that movie, I now know exactly what's gonna happen.

[B]

You weren't alive the last time we had one of those. I remember the smoke.

[C]

I just didn't take much interest in, like, what goes on behind the scenes. I know the basic facts of it, but being able to watch the movie, that sort of takes you behind the doors of the Vatican when that process is taking place to elect a new pope, I found fascinating. I really enjoy the movie, but that's, you know, that's one of the frontrunners for sure. Best Actress. That's going to come down to probably Mikey Madison from Enora, who won the bafta, or Demi Moore, who won the Golden Globes and the SAG Awards, which.

[B]

Feels like the plot of the movie that Demi Moore is nominated for. So that's got to be. That's an interesting angle of, like, a young actress up against an older actress. So, yeah, go check it.

[C]

And we spoke about this a few weeks ago when the nominees were announced that we're all going for Demi Moore because we love the substance, or at least I love the substance, and Isabella loves the substance as well.

[B]

So I like listening to a podcast describing me the plot of the substance. That's the same.

[C]

And then I'm always going to give shout out to the screenwriters on these things. So best adapted screenplay, the front runner is probably Peter Straughan from Conclave. And best original screenplay, the front run is probably Sean Baker for Anora. So just wanted to give those, those.

[B]

Guys shout out what's going on with Wicked? Are they still in the conversation for any of these things or.

[C]

No, there's probably more like technical categories I think for Wicked rather than, you know, best movie or anything like that. I think it's gonna be those below the line sort of.

[B]

Did Ariana. Is Ariana nominated for supporting? I believe so. Which is very interesting because she really was a co lead. That was kind of the whole thing about Wicked. But I guess I believe the actor, I think Cynthia Erivo might be nominated as well. Well, certainly gonna be interesting to watch. It's the Oscars. So you don't really. And it's the Oscars with Conan. So there. You really don't have to say. I don't. I could not watch any of the movies and I would still watch that because Conan rules and I think it'll be great. So a big cultural moment will all be there. Right after we watch the IndyCar race at noon, then we'll take a little break. I don't know, how long are IndyCar races?

[C]

Yeah, a couple hours.

[B]

Right. And we'll take a little break, have some dinner maybe and then sit down and watch the Oscars. So good job. All right, that's a podcast. Specifically the 11th episode of a podcast. Thank you guys so much for listening. Thanks to Miro for being here. What a fun time. We will be back on Thursday with another rip roaring episode for you. For all our casuals out there. I was trying to think of what we were going to call our fans and then I realized I think it would just be casuals. Is that bad? Should we. Do we have to make it more cutesy? Should they be casualties? No, probably not.

[A]

It's good.

[B]

I don't know. I think sound off in the comments. I think it's. We'll probably just call them casuals. But don't forget, we are at Casuals the podcast or casualskin gmail.com 646-80-10043 thank you all so much for being here. I love you. I mean it. See you Thursday.