Lineman TDs, Bea Arthur, and Red Flags for Sports Fans | with Jared Freid

Summary

Casuals with Katie Nolan: "Lineman TDs, Bea Arthur, and Red Flags for Sports Fans" (with Jared Freid)

Release: October 23, 2025 | Host: Katie Nolan | Guest: Jared Freid

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Episode Overview

This episode of Casuals with Katie Nolan welcomes comedian and podcast host Jared Freid to an energetic, irreverent roundtable on sports fandom, nostalgia, the Golden Bachelor, and the sometimes embarrassing realities of being a fan. Katie and Jared riff on everything from childhood football glories to modern dating "red flags" in sports fans, offering thoughtful and hilarious commentary on sports culture, personal identity, and the increasingly blurred line between fans and the games themselves. The show blends sports news with personal anecdotes, pop culture references, and crowd-pleasing debates—true to the podcast’s mission of making sports talk fun and accessible for all.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Sports News Roundup

(04:10–15:17)

• World Series Set: The panel revisits their mostly-wrong game predictions and playfully critiques their own misconceptions about upcoming MLB outcomes.

  • “Of course they were going to go to Bizardo, and of course it wasn’t going to go well…” (Katie, 05:08)

• National Allegiances: Katie reflects on the trope of USA vs. Canada in sports rivalries, expressing preference for rooting based on story rather than country and resisting the urge to default to “America first.”

  • “Once we’re out there in the world, that’s America. That’s my team; they represent me and I root for them.” (Katie, 07:02)

• NBA on NBC Returns: The hosts praise the return of NBC’s NBA coverage, with nostalgic appreciation for “Roundball Rock” and the network’s attention to honoring the product and history.

  • “What an indictment… that the number one praise is how much the broadcast cares about and loves the product of basketball. That should be everybody, across the board.” (Katie, 13:12)
  • “They knocked it out of the park.” (Chris, 11:26)

2. Guest Introduction: Jared Freid

(15:17–18:25)

• Katie introduces Jared Freid, highlighting his podcasting pedigree (JTrain, U Up), comedy career, and Boston sports fan roots.

3. Happy Gilmore 2 & Modern Nostalgia

(18:25–24:04)

• Jared and Katie roast “Happy Gilmore 2” for its reliance on nostalgia and celebrity cameos (like Travis Kelce), wishing instead for fresh comedic talent to be featured, and bemoaning how beloved figures can sometimes play it too safe.
  • “The reason we are going to revolt, it is the picture of income inequality in this country… You didn’t need Travis Kelce to do mediocre acting to make sure people go see it. We were going to see it.” (Jared, 18:45)

4. Being a Transplant Sports Fan

(25:36–31:56)

• Moving and Fandom: Jared reflects on how moving away from Massachusetts changed his feeling of “local” fandom, and how being in a place like NYC means reinterpreting sports loyalties.
  • “It’s way harder to live in the illusion that the people of Cincinnati don’t deserve to win as much as the people of Boston when you have very similar malls with the same Chick-fil-A.” (Jared, 25:46)
• Katie notes the impact of working in sports media on fluctuating team allegiances and the odd expectation of impartiality.

5. Is Being a Fan Embarrassing?

(31:56–33:59)

• The group discusses whether being a sports fan is “embarrassing,” agreeing there’s a self-aware stupidity and purposeful suspension of disbelief in hardcore fandom.
  • “It’s immediately showing your stupidity. The definition... Cowherd always says: fan is short for fanatic. You’re acting like a crazy person.” (Jared, 32:07)
• They contrast fandom in sports vs. other domains (“cinema fan”) and muse on the joy and jealousy of losing yourself in something so completely.

6. Family Ties & NFL Bloodlines

(39:03–45:13)

• Jared shares unique insights on rooting for the Chicago Bears, given his brother Harry’s role as Director of Research & Analytics for the team. This adds a personal, life-or-death element to watching games, and recasts how one roots for a team:
  • “I am a Bears — this is life or death, this is family, this is blood.” (Jared, 40:41)
• A run of hilarious family and wedding planning anecdotes ensue, revealing the crossover between sports and personal life.

7. Local Legend: Jared’s Lineman Touchdown

(47:24–55:46)

• Jared relives his crowning high school football moment: intercepting a ball and running back a 14-yard touchdown against Katie’s hometown team, Framingham.
  • “I intercepted a ball and ran it back 14 yards for a touchdown… All 14 of them as a D-liner.” (Jared, 47:24)
• The two realize they were at the same game (Jared on the field, Katie dancing at halftime), triggering a delightful burst of shared nostalgia/generational cringe.
• Jared explains why he called himself “TD Freed” long after — earning a math teacher’s recognition and endless ribbing from friends.

Memorable Quote:
"It is like Al Bundy talking about his 10 touchdowns."
— Jared (49:16)

8. Modern Baseball: Too Much Math?

(57:03–59:15)

• Jared laments that baseball has become “personality-less” and too centered around advanced stats, which displaces the old-school stories and player narratives that made it compelling.
  • “I want Pedro throwing a ball at someone’s head. I want that… the rough edges more than the perfectly… the math does bug me, too.” (Jared, 57:59)

9. The Golden Bachelor & Football Culture

(68:45–83:24)

• Mel Owens Controversy:
  Jared unpacks the headlines around Mel Owens, the former NFL linebacker turned Golden Bachelor, who said he’d only date women 45-60 (while being 66).
  • “If they’re 60 or over, I’m cutting them… This is not the Silver Bachelor, this is the Golden Bachelor. But they’re gonna be hot, don’t worry about it.” (Mel Owens, recounted by Katie, 69:53)
• Jared, a Bachelor superfan, roasted Mel on the show and reflects on his lack of self-awareness in the role vs. prior “tearjerker” Bachelors.
  • “He didn’t get how big a deal being the Bachelor was, like this is an elected position… there’s Cinderella involved.” (Jared, 75:02)
• Defending Mel:
  Jared argues Mel reflected a common preconception about what dating after 60 “looks like” — until the show subverted expectations with fun, vibrant contestants.
  • “It actually made you think of that age differently after watching the show.” (Jared, 77:15)
• Katie and Jared agree the Golden Bachelor succeeds because it exposes new family dynamics and interrogates what love and partnership mean late in life.

10. Red Flags for Sports Fans: Dating Game Segment

(84:33–99:03)

Katie unveils a bouquet of “challenge flags.” Jared, as a dating podcast authority, has to decide which sports fan behaviors are genuine “red flags” in partner compatibility:

Examples:

• Superstitious Behavior: Not a red flag — “fun.”
• Pregaming: Not a red flag unless can’t function after.
• Wearing a Jersey to Church: Red flag — “Not knowing the environment.”
• Bandwagoning: Not a red flag — “A person who likes fun!”
• Harassing players online: Big red flag — “Misunderstanding where you belong in this whole thing.”
• Slamming a friend through a flaming table in a parking lot (Bills Mafia): Red flag — “Not ready for a serious relationship.”
• Eating horse poop after Super Bowl (Philly fan): Red flag — “Don’t date that guy.”
• Crying after a Super Bowl loss: Green flag — “A full range of emotions.”
• Stealing a home run ball from a child: Only a red flag if you don’t give it to the kid after.

Memorable Quote:
“Nothing changes a human more than a T-shirt gun… People turn into T-shirt gun people!”
— Jared (99:13)

11. Advice Segment: The Marathon Sign

(102:07–107:31)

• Listener Ryan asks for sign ideas to encourage his girlfriend at her first marathon. Jared and Katie weigh in:
  • Avoid puns that can be mocked, don’t make the sign about yourself (“participation trophy husband”), and absolutely follow through if promising a dog.
  • General rule: sign/message should work for both “grandma and your friends.”
  • Personalization wins the day: draw on her unique fears, dreams, or in-jokes.

12. Quick Fire: Life as a Comedian & Relationship Talk

(109:27–111:17)

• Jared shares the difficulty of dating as a public figure and the blurred boundaries between “material” and real life.
• Katie discusses how her partner (comedian Dan Soder) turns fights into comedy, helping her find humor in tough moments.

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• “The act of being a fan is dumb… we don’t judge things based on how they are. It’s like the Dave Matthews Band theory: it’s not a bad band, it’s the person who likes them the most that you hate.”
  (Jared, 37:00)

• “You put your own name [on a jersey]? What are you, a toddler? It’s crazy, but it’s not a red flag — they have whimsy.”
  (Jared, 96:43)

• “Flood the comments. Just do something… [We] need the worst thing on earth, the most toxic thing on earth, to make the videos go. That’s what Internet comments are — fossil fuel.”
  (Jared, 96:20)

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Additional Memorable Moments

• Serendipitous High School Connection: Katie and Jared realize their high school paths literally crossed—Jared’s lineman touchdown in a Framingham–Needham game which Katie cheered at as a Framingham dance team member.
  (50:13–51:42)

• Fantasy Football Check-In:
  Isabella, the team's newbie manager, continues her undefeated streak in the show’s fantasy football update—adding a dash of enthusiasm and inexperience that's celebrated by the team.
  (114:26–119:00)

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Timestamps of Important Segments

• 04:10 — World Series predictions & national allegiances
• 10:56 — NBA on NBC nostalgia and coverage praise
• 18:25 — Jared’s Happy Gilmore 2 rant
• 25:36 — On being a relocated sports fan
• 31:56 — Is fandom embarrassing?
• 39:03 — NFL family ties/Bears fan evolution
• 47:24 — TD Freed: The lineman touchdown story
• 68:45 — Golden Bachelor and the Mel Owens controversy
• 84:33 — Sports fan red flags dating game
• 102:07 — Listener advice: marathon sign
• 114:26 — Isabella’s fantasy football update

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Tone, Style, and Takeaway

The episode brims with camaraderie, self-deprecating humor, and open dives into the social meaning of sports. Both Katie and Jared bring warmth and wit to even the most absurd moments of fandom, making sports feel like a welcoming, messy, and often embarrassing family you can’t help but root for. Through laughter and genuine reflection, “Casuals” keeps its promise: sports talk that feels like recess, not homework.

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For fans looking for insights on the Golden Bachelor, sports as social glue, or the real-life etiquette of fandom (and dating one!), this episode is a must-listen.

Transcript

[Jared Freed]

Morning, Zoe. Got donuts.

[Katie Nolan]

Jeff Bridges, why are you still living above our garage?

[Jared Freed]

Well, I dig the mattress and I want to be in a T mobile commercial like you teach me. So Dana.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh no, I'm not really prepared. I couldn't possibly at T Mobile get the new iPhone 17 Pro on them. It's designed to be the most powerful iPhone yet and has the ultimate pro camera system.

[Jared Freed]

Wow, impressive. Let me try. T mobile is the best place to get iPhone 17 Pro because they've got the best network.

[Isabella]

Nice.

[Katie Nolan]

Je free.

[Jared Freed]

You heard them. T mobile is the best place to get the new iPhone 17 Pro on us with eligible traded in any condition. So what are we having for lunch?

[Katie Nolan]

Dude, my work here is done.

[Jared Freed]

The 24 month bill credits on experience beyond for well qualified customers plus tax and $35 device connection charge credit send and balance due. If you pay off earlier, Cancel Finance Agreement. IPhone 17 Pro 256 gigs 1099.99 A new line minimum 100 plus a month plan with auto pay plus taxes and fees required. Best mobile network in the US based on analysis by Oklahoma Speed Test Intelligence Data 182025 Visit t mobile.com when it.

[Katie Nolan]

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[Isabella]

No.

[Katie Nolan]

You didn't?

[Isabella]

No.

[Katie Nolan]

On October 21, he posted a picture of himself eating some yummy pizza on his Instagram stories. While the picture looks harmless at first glance, fans immediately spotted a fork placed on.

[Isabella]

I'm looking at it right now. Is he cutting it with a fork and knife?

[Katie Nolan]

We don't. I mean all we have is this one photo. But the photo does. Now I will say it's like a pizza that almost has like too much. That's too much salad on a pizza.

[Isabella]

I was going to say maybe he's using it to like scoop up the salad that falls off.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. Like if you're eating a full salad pizza, like the way they do those, you know, a cold salad on top of a warm. Then I could A fork is, I guess, is okay.

[Isabella]

Yeah, but.

[Katie Nolan]

But this isn't really a full salad pizza. It's a pizza that has a little bit of salad on it.

[Isabella]

All right, LeBron, pick them up with your hands.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. Figure it.

[Jared Freed]

Hello.

[Katie Nolan]

Hello. Happy Thursday. Welcome to Casuals. This is Casuals, a sports podcast that's for people that never really thought they'd listen to a sports podcast, but here you are. Here we are. And isn't it beautiful? I'm Katie Nolan, your host. Obsessed with sports, love sports, have worked in sports for a while now, and I just want to make sure that everybody in the world has a chance to maybe like sports. And so we started Casuals. I'm joined by my casualties. We're not going to talk too much because we have a guest today and he talks too much. As do I. We're being clear. As do I. We both talk too much. And so I've got to save space for the amount of time we're gonna spend with my friend Jared Freed, a very funny comedian. You may know him from many podcasts that he hosts or from his work on the Bachelor. We're gonna get to all of that. The casualties are here. Chris, say hi.

[Chris]

Hi.

[Brady]

Brady, brief hello go to Isabella.

[Isabella]

Hi.

[Katie Nolan]

Wow. Good job, everyone. If you wanna reach us [e-mail], our voicemail is 646-801-0043. On IG and TikTok, we are Casuals, the podcast. Legally, I am record required to remind you that we have merch. Now, if you want a comfy sweatshirt, a fluffy comfy hoodie, maybe a T shirt that's in the colors of your favorite team, but instead of it saying anything about that favorite team, it just says Casuals a bunch. You can get that. Go to SiriusXM store.com Casuals I think we're pretty reasonably priced. We tried to get some high quality, some more budget options. There's. It should be fine. But if you got a sticker sheet, that's cool. Gotta love that. And if you. If you've got any, you know, if you have any issues, just email us and let us know and we'll. We'll get. No, I'll get someone else on it, is what I'm saying.

[Isabella]

Don't. Don't email us, please.

[Katie Nolan]

Before we get to Jared, we've got to deal with a little bit of news just so that we don't go without addressing. The World Series is now set. It was not the last time we saw you. It was the last time you saw us because the game had already happened, but it hadn't happened yet when we recorded our podcast. Now I also would like to bring up. We predicted what would have already happened in the game that happened to the listener. And while most of us were wildly off looking at you, Chris, who predicted a perfect game from Shane Bieber and we didn't quite see that. I think he went four innings, if not less close.

[Chris]

Just like Brady. Well, we're close.

[Katie Nolan]

Very close.

[Chris]

Neither of us got it right.

[Katie Nolan]

Brady's was much closer, I would say. Brady, what was your prediction for the game?

[Brady]

So I predicted that the Mariners were going to go to Eduard Bizardo and he was going to be overused in late innings and he was going to give up a game winning home run and the Blue Jays were going to win. Unfortunately, I girl bossed too close to the sun and I got cued and said Joey Lorfito when it was just George Springer hitting the homer.

[Katie Nolan]

And I can just say if there was any note to give live in the moment about your prediction, Brady, I think we may have even addressed it. That part was like a really. And then this guy who has played maybe a second of the entire series is going to hit the game winning home run. But I, to Brady's credit, when Bizarro went in, I almost texted the group and said, oh God, here's Bizardo, let's see what happens. And I didn't. But then Bizzardo gave up a whole second pitch. Second pitch, second pitch was a ball. And Brady texted and said, like Bizzardo, I was right. But to his credit said, but I also said, lo Profito, no credit, half credit does not exist. No credit, I didn't get it right. And so I'd like to give Brady credit for saying that although no credit for saying the prediction, you did predict baseball. And also like now that I look at it, of course they were going to go to Bizardo and of course it wasn't going to go well because Bizarro had been pitching way too many innings in that series so far. And it felt like they couldn't get what they wanted out of Brian Wu. He was starting to struggle. And so then I just feel like they were like, bizarro will get us through to our closer. And he didn't. He didn't. And they lost. And it was devastating. And I'm sorry to Mariners fans, if any of you are listening and congratulations to Toronto fans. I didn't think I'd ever root for the Blue Jays, find myself in this Sort of situation as they are in my, you know, division. I don't normally like to. But against the Dodgers, you leave me no other choice. So it's Go Blue Jays for me. Does anyone else want to pledge an allegiance before we move on?

[Brady]

I don't know. I went. I leaned pretty far. Kendrick. So I don't know if I could swing back to Drake this time.

[Katie Nolan]

I don't think it's Drake. And can I do this here? I don't think we need to make the World Series a Kendric, because we just kind of got out of that. And if we're being honest, it's sort of a heavy topic that we got a little. We had fun with as much as you can, and now I think we should probably move on from it.

[Brady]

Heavy topic, but it was a bop for a whole summer.

[Katie Nolan]

Absolutely. Not at all saying that it wasn't a great song. Great song. It's just. I don't think we need to bring it back up. And then also, can we not turn this into a Canada USA thing? Because I've said before, regardless of my feelings about anybody who plays for and represents America on an international stage, regardless of my personal feelings about them, I do think it is our duty as Americans when we leave the house. We're one team. We. We can fight back at home amongst us, but once we're out there in the world, that's America. That's my team. They represent me and I root for them. And so when we turn this into an America Canada thing, then I would have to root for the Dodgers. And that's just not something I am comfortable doing. And I also think that, like, four nations, it ruined four nations for me how much that became USA Canada. And I wasn't necessarily feeling like I was aligning with the side that I was technically supposed to align with. You know what I mean? So maybe we could just make this small baseball team versus big baseball team.

[Brady]

It is owned by the entirety of Rogers Communications. It's not like the Blue Jays are poor.

[Katie Nolan]

They're poor. Help them. They're poor. They got a homegrown star that they just paid. They've got like, there's a. There's there's fun narratives. I just don't want to do the lazy Canada America because then you're going to make me side with Canadians and then I'm going to be painted as anti American and they'll have something to point to. And I just don't like the way that this all works out. I am pro the America. I believe in. I don't think she's at her best right now, but I believe in her still. And I'm anti dodger. Sorry.

[Brady]

I'm rooting for Buddy Kennedy to have a good time. The the middle infielder who played two games for the Blue Jays and seven games for the Dodgers this year and gets a World Series ring no matter what either way.

[Katie Nolan]

Well then I'm. He's probably having a pretty good time. You sure you don't want to predict he's going to hit the game winning something?

[Brady]

No, he's sitting home. He's not on either tv.

[Katie Nolan]

That's very funny. Well, imagine sitting at home and getting a ring that's our king. That's what we would hope we if you gave a fan a World Series ring. While we're talking about ring and this will trans transition us into the NBC NBA on NBC of it all. Did you see the Oklahoma City Thunders ring that they unveiled? It's a big championship ring as it always is. And it has all these little, you know, things that make it special that they've made it uniquely their ring. This is any championship. Now they go through their little presentation of like and three diamonds here representing the this one. The ring opens up and inside of the comically large ring, the championship ring that you obviously couldn't wear every day, there is a just a plain band that has things on it. I didn't look into what they were, but it looked like maybe the numbers of all the guys on the team. And it's like a wearable championship ring inside the ring of the championship ring.

[Chris]

Smart.

[Brady]

There's a ring in the ring so.

[Katie Nolan]

You just can pop that out and you could put the fancy ring, I don't know, in a pawn shop for all I care and then keep and wear because it's not fair that you don't get to always wear the reminder that you've won a championship because they look ridiculous if you put it.

[Brady]

Yo, dog, I heard you like rings.

[Katie Nolan]

I put a ring.

[Brady]

Put a ring inside your ring.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, it's. I don't know. I sort of feel that way about it. And then another part of me goes, hey, at least it's a ring they can actually wear because these things are ridiculous.

[Brady]

It was supposed to be a ring you could actually wear.

[Katie Nolan]

I know. But then they all just got bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger. It's late stage capitalism. Championship rings NBA on NBC. I look, I'm not gonna sit here and go like I loved it as a kid. I don't have the connection to it that I know die hard NBA fans have of my age group. And so I just wanted to give a voice to those people by saying I saw the reaction online more positive than the reaction to anything I've seen in a very long time except Pam Anderson and Liam Neeson's romance, which turned out to be a fucking fake.

[Brady]

You talk about Leon Nelson.

[Katie Nolan]

What did I say? Oh, Leon Nelson. Yeah. Favorite white boy, almost runner up White boy of the year. People loved it. The return of Round Ball Rock. Obviously we all were hyped on that. That song rules. But there was. People were nervous that they were gonna half ass it or like kind of bring the song back, but ruin it in some way. And I' asking you, Chris and Brady, your thoughts. But I will say it through the lens of everything I saw. People were like this ruled. They nailed it.

[Chris]

I particularly enjoyed the game. I think they got really lucky that the game was as exciting as it was and had as dramatic of an ending as it did. But yeah, they, they, they knocked it out of the park. They did a fantastic job. I think we're always as consumers concerned when a big change like this happens in the sporting landscape. And, you know, new stations get rights to something that they haven't had for a long time. And you wonder whether they can bring back the same magic that they had back in, you know, the 90s, early 2000s. But they did a great job. We saw Michael Jordan at halftime being interviewed by Mike Tirico.

[Katie Nolan]

Is that how that's going to be for the rest of the.

[Brady]

So I'm fine with that.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. Because he was announced originally. We all were like, what's he going to be doing? Because they just said he was going to be like in a special role.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And now it turns out it's Mike Chico interviewing him throughout the season.

[Chris]

I guess just very small tidbits. Wasn't live or anything. It was all pre produced. But it was a more entertaining way of, you know, keeping my interest throughout halftime than anything else they could have done. I haven't watched, I haven't paid attention to anything that's been going on during the halftime of any basketball game for a very, very long time.

[Jared Freed]

Because they don't do it actually.

[Chris]

Exactly.

[Jared Freed]

That's the, the thing that NBC did.

[Brady]

That ESPN doesn't do that you didn't get. Like there were, there must have been a third of the ads during halftime of this. Like they actually did things. And then like before the game where ESPN would have thrown to an ad like tirico just laid out. And we got to watch player introductions and we got to watch the Thunder fans boo Kevin Durant and like, yeah, it expect to just cram every ad.

[Jared Freed]

You can into every minute do that.

[Katie Nolan]

Because it feels like.

[Jared Freed]

Well, the last few years, I was.

[Katie Nolan]

Gonna say, yeah, how long? But it has felt like the last few years it's like, well, of course they put an ad there because they have to put an ad there. And it's kind of nice to go like, actually they don't. They could just not. The main praise that I saw for NBC was that they honored. They took having the product seriously. They like honored the product and put the product first. And you could tell they were genuinely fans and cared about how it was presented to fans of the product. What an indictment on what's came before it. That that is the number one. Like, wow. It's really noticeable how much this broadcast cares about and loves the product of basketball. That should be everybody across the board. The amount of money you're spending on these rights. This should, this should be top priority. And I guess I, I look for hope under any rock I can these days. And I felt a little hopeful seeing that people were like, wow, this is what it looks like when you love sports. Out loud on the sports broadcast.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Brady]

The rock has started four seven footers last night.

[Jared Freed]

Wow.

[Brady]

Or six, 11 or whatever at least. And I'm. It just was a reminder like this sport is ridiculous right now.

[Katie Nolan]

It really is.

[Brady]

Like they should be caring about it. We have four athletic seven footers flying around doing superhero shit. Like we should be treating this like an amazing thing.

[Katie Nolan]

125, 124. The Thunder defeated the Rockets in double overtime. It was an awesome game. Very exciting. Just the right amount of Michael Jordan like you said. So I'm interested to see how it goes. Basketball season has officially started and as I've said on the radio and I've said elsewhere, I'll start paying attention in a couple weeks. Just give me a little bit of time. I'm not ready yet. Late game warriors defeated the LeBron less Lakers. Because he's. His back hurts. Cause he's too old for this. 119. 109. He's not. Not for the club or for the earth. Keep going LeBron, till your grandson. Get your grandson into the team and then you can retire. Fine by me. Luca, 43 points in that game. That's quite a few points.

[Chris]

He's going to average quite a lot of points this season. Especially while LeBron is out.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. Incredible. All right, let's go ahead and get to our guest today. His name is Jared Freed. You probably know and love him already. He's got he's been a host of many popular podcast podcast throughout the years, but one of which is the J Train Podcast and another is you up which is a modern dating podcast that he co hosts. He's also a standup comedian and a friend of mine. So when we come back from a quick break here, we will be joined by the always funny, always has so much to always opinionated Jared Fried. We'll be right back. Viori delivers a new perspective on performance apparel with pieces designed to look great beyond the gym. Whether you're running errands, heading to the office or meeting up with friends, Vuori is perfect for whatever your day brings. Take the Vuori Performance Jogger. They're great for fitness, but they're also stylish enough for everyday wear and comfortable enough for lounging around as part of the dream knit connection. They are made of Viori's softest premium stretch fabric. They're lightweight, moisture wicking and feature a four way performance stretch. Mine, I got them in like a teal green color. What I really love about them is that they're thin. So in this time of the year, sometimes when you put on like a bulky sweatpant, it's too much. These are perfect. They're lightweight, they wick away sweat. So they're very good for wearing even in like a hot month. We're allowed to be comfortable in hot months, guys. And you should do that with the Vuori Performance Jogger. It's an investment in your happiness for our listeners. They are offering 20% off of your first Vuori purchase. Get yourself some of the most comfortable and versatile clothing on the [e-mail] casuals. That's V U O R I.com casuals exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions. With my job, I can't drink during the week.

[Jared Freed]

Weekends are a different story.

[Katie Nolan]

After eight hours of this, I earned my wine. You know what I'm saying?

[Jared Freed]

My family is a lot. It takes me four beers just to.

[Katie Nolan]

Hang out with them.

[Brady]

Binge drinking isn't all college kids doing keg stands. Oregonians in their 30s and 40s binge drink at close to the same rates as younger people, raising our risk for.

[Katie Nolan]

Long term health problems.

[Brady]

[e-mail] an OHA initiative.

[Jared Freed]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Commercial Insurance. Business owners meet Progressive Insurance. They make it easy to get discounts on commercial auto insurance and find coverages to grow with your business quote in as little as 8 [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company coverage provided and serviced by affiliated and third party insurers. Discounts and coverage selections not available in all states or situations.

[Katie Nolan]

911. What is your emergency?

[Jared Freed]

Get off the field. 911 has faced nearly every emergency on earth. ABC Thursdays. They will go where no first responders have gone before.

[Katie Nolan]

Five everyday heroes were launched into space.

[Jared Freed]

All contact with the spacecraft was lost due to a sudden geomagnetic storm.

[Katie Nolan]

Do you copy?

[Jared Freed]

91 1. All new Thursdays, 8, 7 Central on ABC and stream on Hulu.

[Katie Nolan]

We're rolling. Okay.

[Jared Freed]

Are you rolling now? Jared, you missed my point about Marcelo should have been the caddy and Happy Gilmore too.

[Katie Nolan]

Here's the deal with Jared Freed is he's so funny and he has so say that if we don't just start rolling, we're going to miss half of it.

[Jared Freed]

This ain't an act.

[Katie Nolan]

Jared came in with a hot.

[Jared Freed]

It's me all the time.

[Katie Nolan]

A hot Happy Gilmore take. Did you want to put that on wax or do you want me to?

[Jared Freed]

The reason we are going to revolt, it is the picture of income inequality in this country. You're going to see me in my sarong and my battle club running through 6th Avenue going, Marcelo should have been the caddy. Up and coming comedians should have had bigger roles in the movie. Like. Like, here's the thing. You didn't need Travis Kelsey to do mediocre acting to make sure people go see it. We were going to see it.

[Katie Nolan]

I know. For better or for worse, we were going to see it.

[Jared Freed]

We had Kelsey tweet.

[Katie Nolan]

I know you do.

[Jared Freed]

We had Happy Gilmore, too. Put me in my comfy cozies Nostalgia. Suck on the blanket. And they had suck on the blanket. That's right. My brother used to do that. He sucked on the blanket. And that was. You ever wrestle with your siblings? Yeah. Watch. You're like, my sibling's been dead for years, everyone.

[Katie Nolan]

No, no, he's still alive.

[Jared Freed]

Okay, good. My brother used to suck on his. His blankie. And then when we'd wrestle, his finishing move was the put the blankie in your face move.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, Ew. Yeah, that was wet blankie.

[Jared Freed]

That was the. Listen, Jake the snake had a snake. You know, like, listen, we all have our finishing moves.

[Katie Nolan]

Everybody has their thing.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Hot.

[Jared Freed]

Some people suck on toes.

[Katie Nolan]

Did you see how many people said they liked it? It not sucking on toes. Happy Gilmore.

[Jared Freed]

It's disappointing a lot of people. Well, it's disappointing that we're just taking whatever we get given. You know, take your porridge, don't ask for more.

[Katie Nolan]

Eat your slop and shut your mouth.

[Jared Freed]

Right. That's basically what that movie was like. And Adam Sandler, so beloved, you know?

[Katie Nolan]

And I still love him. I do.

[Jared Freed]

Anything. That's the problem. This is the problem. His live show, like, people walk out, they have a new view on life.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

They're like, he played guitar and he. And he gave an ode to Chris Farley. Thank you for touching my nostalgia buttons. And it's like.

[Katie Nolan]

But Happy Gilmore 2 did not touch any of my nostalgia.

[Jared Freed]

No, it made me angry. I was like, listen, you have professional golfers who make millions and millions of dollars. Now, they're like your foil in the movie. Like, we. Here's the problem. You know, we don't know who Shooter McGavin is unless you give him a chance to be a great actor and Happy Gilmore one. So we got no. No one to find from the movie.

[Katie Nolan]

You're right. That's a really good point.

[Jared Freed]

Jerry Sandler did everything for himself and nothing for, well, any funny person. Who's the future Adam Sandler?

[Katie Nolan]

But we still love him.

[Jared Freed]

Well, he's a capitalist pick. He likes money more than he likes helping fellow comedians who remind him of himself.

[Katie Nolan]

So Jared didn't get the part in the movie and he deserved it. No.

[Jared Freed]

Could have helped a young Jew.

[Katie Nolan]

I was surprised by.

[Jared Freed]

We love the Hanukkah song. You comedians. Not anymore.

[Katie Nolan]

We're in it. It was cool.

[Jared Freed]

We don't know who's Jewish anymore because Adam Sandler's hiding them all. I did a movie with his wife. His wife. Awesome.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

She's so nice.

[Katie Nolan]

She does seem awesome.

[Jared Freed]

He's awesome. I'm not saying I love, you know. How are you?

[Katie Nolan]

I'm fine.

[Jared Freed]

What's going on?

[Katie Nolan]

Nothing. What's going on with you?

[Jared Freed]

I was gonna let you have the show. I was gonna shut the up.

[Katie Nolan]

I was gonna take it. But then I also, like, I want to make points on your points. Jared's here. Jared's here. And we're gonna talk about. I was gonna say that it is. It was cool for a lot of golf fans. I don't know how many of those you know.

[Jared Freed]

Well, there's a lot of. I'm getting into golf, but I am a product. I am a relatable comedian because I am just like everyone else, and I am 40, and I'm starting to get into golf just like, oh my God, I'm starting to get into golf. I wonder why? Because we're the same fucking person with no special anything, no special talents, no special story. So you grew up outside of a major city in an upper middle class town, just like me. So.

[Katie Nolan]

And you're in your 40s and you want to like golf.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, and I'm playing a little bit more and I'm taking lessons. And you know, golf has gotten so big that now that's why, you know, the Rider cup was a disaster, a nightmare, because we. It got big enough to go on YouTube and your worst friend was like, I'm going to go to the Ryder Cup. Oh, you get drunk and yell at the players. Oh, I'll do that without any form of like looking in the mirror and thinking maybe I sound like a piece of shit. So yeah, there's a golf is big.

[Katie Nolan]

And I was just going to say for golf fans who saw the golfers in the Happy Gilmore movie, that was cool for them. There were a couple cool cameos.

[Jared Freed]

I don't, I don't think there's one person maybe, but I don't think that did nothing for you. Make a funny movie. What was in service? There's two things that you're making a funny movie for, right? To make people laugh and to make a lot of money. Okay. Do you make an extra dollar because Joe Blow golfer is your foil in the movie? No, but does it make it funnier? No, it makes it less funny.

[Katie Nolan]

It true.

[Jared Freed]

And it makes people who have made money believe they can do comedy.

[Katie Nolan]

There was one golfer specific joke that was very funny. But if you didn't know that that golfer was a real person, you wouldn't have known that it was the joke. Remember the guy from the first one, the kid that they always made a joke that he grew up to be this actual professional golfer. I know got the golfer to play the role.

[Jared Freed]

That was right. They thought he looked like him. That was the big joke on the tour is that he looked like someone from Happy Gilmore.

[Katie Nolan]

And then they cast. That's the joke an uncle makes that.

[Jared Freed]

Gets a laugh at.

[Katie Nolan]

Than I would be nice to Adam Sandler, who is not my friend yet.

[Jared Freed]

And I wouldn't mind for me, I didn't get a message. Hey, after my Netflix special. Hey, good for you. Another fellow Jew. You did a good job.

[Katie Nolan]

That's what it is. It's the, it's the Jew you need a. Every Jew to congratulate.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, I look differently at other Jew. I go, I see some family there I see some.

[Katie Nolan]

I recognize you.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, I. I see some game recognizing. Everyone gets to have their people. Yeah, I'm out on an island.

[Katie Nolan]

So then how come you don't speak up more about the Jewish Renaissance that hockey is experiencing right now?

[Jared Freed]

What's his name? I followed him. There's a couple that's. No, the guy in the Rangers. Fuck that guy.

[Katie Nolan]

Jack Luke and Quinn Hughes.

[Jared Freed]

I follow the Jew on the New York Rangers. He didn't follow me back. I'm out. Wow me.

[Katie Nolan]

So you unfollow.

[Jared Freed]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

You'll do that?

[Jared Freed]

Of course you'll fall.

[Katie Nolan]

How long do you wait before if.

[Jared Freed]

I'm, like, watching your stories and watching your life unfold before my eyes, there's a moment where I'm like, what am I doing?

[Katie Nolan]

Do I follow you? You. I should really make sure from.

[Jared Freed]

I should really make sure.

[Katie Nolan]

Let me just double.

[Jared Freed]

I will stand up abruptly and you'll hear. The listeners will hear the fumble of a ear pod. You know when you hear someone leave a show, I'll get tangled in the wire if I am not following.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm on the guest WI Fi and it's making me sign in. There's no chance we're going to find out today. But I'll show you if we're not. I will fix it. It's the E before the I that gets me. I'm always typing you like you're fried.

[Jared Freed]

E, I, D. That's right.

[Katie Nolan]

That's how you spell his last name. So we asked you before you came here.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Your sort of approach to sports, where you stand with sports. I wanna. Don't even say. I would like to read your words to you so that we can discuss.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, I couldn't.

[Katie Nolan]

You said. And I quote, I'll shut up while I say something. You said. So it really is just more of you talking. I'm a Boston sports fan, but I've noticed how hard. How it's hard to be a local sports fan once you move. You have to really work at it. It's way harder to live in the illusion that the people of Cincinnati don't deserve to win as much as the people of Boston when you have very similar malls with the same Chick Fil A. I love sports, but I'm less of a fan.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Talk to me about this.

[Jared Freed]

I thought you and I might connect on that subject. As someone who left Boston to go or the greater Boston an area not to piss off Boston people.

[Katie Nolan]

Yes. Because I'm from Framingham.

[Jared Freed]

You're from Framingham. You're a Flyer, which we're going to get to later.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, of course. It's in the rundown.

[Jared Freed]

It's on the rundown. Because I may have had a moment against the Framingham Flyers in my own sports life. Tease. So. So I think you and I probably share that thing where you're kind like, well, I'll speak for myself. And then let me know if you agree. I don't want to speak for a woman.

[Katie Nolan]

Please.

[Jared Freed]

You know, when you have periods. Wow.

[Katie Nolan]

Speaking for yourself.

[Jared Freed]

Okay.

[Katie Nolan]

You know that uterus you have?

[Brady]

I.

[Jared Freed]

So I've been outside. I've left Boston for college. You know, I left Needham for college. I went. I went to Needham High Public school, you know, outside of Needham. Outside of Boston.

[Katie Nolan]

Needham want them?

[Jared Freed]

You need them? We got them. So I go to Penn State. I was an outsider at Penn State because Penn State is more Philly Pittsburgh jersey. So it was fun to be an outsider who's now, like, trying to be a Penn State fan because you get to be kind of the. The naysayer. The. The. The little bit the more real. You get to be the real. In the. The smoothie of the fandom. You get to be the, you know, the kind of like, I don't know. We're not that good. It's not that great. I don't have the emotional ties to my childhood. With the Penn State thing, I wasn't sitting on.

[Katie Nolan]

You've just started liking them. You're using, like, fresh eyes.

[Jared Freed]

Fresh. Exactly. Thank you. That's why you got the big bucks.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, that's right. A TV with my name.

[Jared Freed]

TV with your name on. I got nothing. Didn't even get auditioned for a Fellow Jews movie. So then I moved to New York, and then, like, I kind of reconnect with Boston people a little bit. Because you have your high school friends that moved here as well. But, like, so we'll go, like, watch games. But then you travel the country for comedy and you meet people who love their team. And I'm, like, truly jealous of the. The community of sports. Because when you live in New York City and people in Boston be like, is it hard to live in New York City? Do they, like, take your cap and throw it off your head? And you're like, no, it's a transplant town. There's no better place to watch a football game than New York City because everyone's just cheering for different teams. It's not that serious. Serious. So it's hard to get serious here. You have to, like, legitimately check in with the Red Sox every day.

[Katie Nolan]

And you're not doing that?

[Jared Freed]

No, I think that takes a lot of work. I think that takes more work than I'm willing to do, which is why we.

[Katie Nolan]

You can't speak for me only because my experience was while moving out of the city and into other places, I also started working in sports. And once you start working in sports, it's very much encouraged to not talk about your fandom, to hide your fandom, because you're supposed to sort of be impartial, I guess, which I've always thought was strange because it's like, well, not reporting on sports. I just talk about it, and if I didn't like it, why would I be here? But anyway, I digress.

[Jared Freed]

Well, a few of those, I'm sure. And so I'm sure there's some fakers.

[Katie Nolan]

I had to sort of grow my. Like, I came into sports only knowing my own teams. And then once I got into sports, I was like, well, now I'm. I'm sort of responsible for knowing all these other teams, which made it a little bit more like work. But also, weirdly enough, grew my personal connection to my teams, really. So now I think I probably know less about my teams than I should, but I care about them just as deeply. And you can't take that.

[Jared Freed]

Would you say that you exert t. I would assume with that specific story that you might hate your own teams more. Cause you know them a little bit.

[Katie Nolan]

I mean, I hate them in the sense that I hate the management of them and the ownership of them and the way that they choose to. To spend their money on players. But I'm also trying to divest myself from the business side of sports because I've never cared. And it's sort of becoming dominant in the covering of sport. Everyone's talking about it like it's all about the money. And to me, like, the money was supposed to just be something that was made off of it. And we never really talked about, well, and now it's like they saved all that money when they traded Raphael Devers. I'm like, I don't give a. It's not my money, right?

[Jared Freed]

Well, why would I care? If you live in a world where there's a finite amount of money to spend, then it does.

[Katie Nolan]

Which baseball does not.

[Jared Freed]

Which baseball doesn't matter. Like, yeah, it is. Like, what's the context with which. Who saved money?

[Katie Nolan]

Right?

[Jared Freed]

Like, if you can spend endless money, well, you also have the highest price tickets in the league. So you're trying to save money while having the highest price tickets in the league. So I have to assume this management doesn't give a fuck about me. Right. So like, you know, that's where the business, you know, becomes again, like. And I. That's where, like, I think I lose out is because you don't have Tuesday night you. Where you watch in the game when it's a big game. Oh, you know who's in town. There's none of that.

[Katie Nolan]

And.

[Jared Freed]

And it's just in the weather and since I've been here and now I moved to Florida, it's hard to like feel a family thing with a team where I know them. And then I noticed it because the Knicks were really good last year. And I noticed how it was the first time in 18 years living in New York City where people were asking, thinking, when where are you watching the game? And you felt the Knicks. And I was like, and I really like the team. Brunson's really easy to like. And I was like.

[Katie Nolan]

And Timothy Chalamet.

[Jared Freed]

Timothy Shall. Yeah, you got Chalamet, Ben Stiller, you know, they're all hanging.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. So it was like cultural. It was a good. So do you. I guess my main question to you.

[Jared Freed]

I guess I lose the community.

[Katie Nolan]

This is what I think. This is what I think you were getting at. And I kind of want to know your. Your genuine, honest thoughts on Jared. Is being a sports fan embarrassing? Yeah, it is.

[Jared Freed]

It's immediately showing your stupidity the. The definition. Colin Cowherd always says the fan is short for fanatic. So that's. To me, I find that very true. Like you're acting like a crazy person.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. But if you're a cinema fan.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

You know, they're, they're. That's also short for fanatic.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Is it embarrassing to be a fan of. You just think being a fan in general is embarrassing.

[Jared Freed]

Absolutely.

[Katie Nolan]

Behavior.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah. There's nobody done.

[Katie Nolan]

So you like sports? Not a fan.

[Jared Freed]

I like sports. But I know because now blind faith can be fun. Yeah, I, I kind of. I'm jealous of it. Nick Kroll used to have a joke about dumb people having sex. And like it was like this you can find on YouTube. I think he didn't like Kimmel way back when about like how much more fun they have having sex because they're not thinking of anything.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. So I think how hot they look.

[Jared Freed]

Right. So it's like so fun to just lose yourself and a team. Like, like the idea like I grew up you probably as well. Definitely as well. With the Brady era Patriots and 2001, the idea that the Patriots are winning the Super bowl after 9, 11, and you two, playing at the super bowl halftime show, that's all stupidity. To believe this was all meant to be. And oh, my God, America's coming out on top. I'm jealous of that version of me. Like, to lose yourself in it and feel like. Like you're part of it in some way when you're not, you know, like.

[Katie Nolan]

You are kind of.

[Jared Freed]

Kind of. Again, like if you're in the stadium, you're cheering. Defense D. You know, like, you do that so theatrically.

[Katie Nolan]

Can I get that again?

[Jared Freed]

Just a quick defense. Defense, very good.

[Katie Nolan]

Like, it's defensive.

[Jared Freed]

Throwing their pom poms, the crowd in a tizzy.

[Katie Nolan]

It's something.

[Jared Freed]

Tom Brady passionately grabs one of the balls. Bill Belichick, then dating an appropriately aged.

[Katie Nolan]

Woman at the time, kind of. Can we talk about him?

[Jared Freed]

Sure, sure.

[Katie Nolan]

Where are you standing on that? Where are you at on the Bill Bell check.

[Jared Freed]

It's weird. I. I think weird is like a fun perspective. I don't know. Like, I don't want to, like, get too into it.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure.

[Jared Freed]

Because I. I don't know. It does go down the road of, like, anti woman pretty quickly.

[Katie Nolan]

Of everything. Anything that involves a woman, if people can take that off ramp and just focus on how much they hate her, they will. That's always how it works on the Internet.

[Jared Freed]

Right. And she doesn't make it easy.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. She is. She is a.

[Jared Freed]

She makes it easy to go down.

[Katie Nolan]

That road, you know, but it does not mean it is the road. The only road of the story that matters.

[Jared Freed]

She's Shakespearean. The relationships, like, Shakespearean. It's very like, this is the fall of man. This is throughout history, you know? But I also think Belichick, I think he's got a weird dating life. Like, I think that's, like, kind of underrated. People don't. Didn't he, like, I. I alleged or. This is my misremembering. We need a Google for real.

[Katie Nolan]

Somebody please be on the Googling.

[Jared Freed]

You're a real. Please, please. Real person in the industry.

[Katie Nolan]

Please, please be careful.

[Jared Freed]

I didn't. He, like, didn't his wife. Didn't they meet because she was like, worked at the jets and like, he, like, it was like a cheating thing to begin with. Like, I don't think his, like, dating past has really been unearthed. Pablo Torrey, for all the work he's done, he hasn't gone into the history of, like, Bill Pelican's love life.

[Katie Nolan]

Well, we. I mean, that's what he's actually doing. When it isn't what he's actually there. He's trying to show that the guy is following a siren song. Essentially, this person that he's dating has gotten into the leadership council of his whole thing.

[Jared Freed]

I get that very quick. I think what Pablo is doing is great. Like, I think people aren't doing it because there's no money in it it. And if there was money in investigative journalism, there'd be more people doing it. And he's just getting accused right now of being like a bad person for being an investigative journalist. Like, which is crazy.

[Katie Nolan]

Isn't it funny? Watch people go like, why are you looking into that? You're like, because it's a job.

[Jared Freed]

That's what we do.

[Katie Nolan]

Job title.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

How it's done.

[Jared Freed]

I don't. It's very bizarre. But that's the. This is why we're living in the idiocra.

[Brady]

The.

[Jared Freed]

The future idiocracy promised. Like, that's like a dumb person's anger.

[Katie Nolan]

Single.

[Jared Freed]

So I respect what he does, even though I'm still waiting on my invitation to the show.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, I can. I can text him.

[Jared Freed]

I would love to.

[Katie Nolan]

I don't think he's going to like you saying that sports fans are dumb, but we can work on it.

[Jared Freed]

I think fandom is dumb. Not sports fans aren't dumb. I met plenty of sports. Sports fans, but I think the act of being a fan, like, we don't judge things based on how they are. It's. I call it the Dave Matthews Band theory. Dave Matthews Band's not a bad band. It's the person that likes them the most that you hate.

[Katie Nolan]

That's. Yeah, that was like oar in. In college. I feel like it was when you'd go like, okay, we get it. Rick and Morty went through a bit of that for a while. The loudest Rick and Morty fan you know is the one that you're like, right, right.

[Jared Freed]

Like, it's like there's a point of like being too into anything is bad.

[Katie Nolan]

They met in 2007 in Florida, and Holiday became the president of this was long term relationship. I'm thinking of Linda Holiday. I don't know if you're thinking of anyone one before that. But Holiday became president of the Belichick foundation, working alongside him on philanthropic efforts. They shared a dog named Nike. They never married, and their breakup was in 2023.

[Jared Freed]

That's weird. Never marrying. Who do you have kids with?

[Katie Nolan]

Hey, look, you're talking to a lady. Who's been engaged for quite some time.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah. What the.

[Katie Nolan]

I. It's my fault. It's me. I have to plan it, and I don't want to plan it.

[Jared Freed]

What's wrong with you? You hate your dad.

[Katie Nolan]

No, I thought about it, that's all. First, I consider. My mom and I have a fraught relationship. We get through it.

[Jared Freed]

I don't know. I don't know. Why don't you get married? When are you gonna do it?

[Katie Nolan]

I don't know. Whenever I figure out what the correct way to get married is.

[Jared Freed]

What do you mean, correct?

[Katie Nolan]

That's how my brain is. Exactly. And so I don't know how.

[Jared Freed]

Let's do it right now. Dan, get in here.

[Katie Nolan]

He's with us. He's not. He's home. All right. Where were we? I think so, too. I think that's. The pressure is, like, I could invite so many cool, fun people. I could throw the coolest, funnest party. I don't know how to do that. That. That's a long story.

[Jared Freed]

And it would be reported on. In a. In a magazine. That wouldn't matter. Like, you're not. Like, you guys wouldn't get paid.

[Katie Nolan]

We've actually really. Page Six was the one of the first places that said we were dating. And we both were like, why is this? Who cares about this?

[Jared Freed]

Oh, that's cool.

[Katie Nolan]

And then we found out there was a rat in our building. Not a literal rat, but a person who went and called Page and was like, I think Katie Nolan and Dan Soder.

[Jared Freed]

See, that's a sports fan. That's an idiot dummy.

[Katie Nolan]

He was like, my neighbor. I didn't even know a neighbor, knew who I was. Now I feel unsafe.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, it feels a little bit unsafe.

[Katie Nolan]

But we don't live there anymore, so it doesn't matter.

[Jared Freed]

I think you guys would. Here's the wedding I would plan for you guys.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay. Let's go.

[Jared Freed]

It is Hudson, New York. You're gonna do, like, a Westchester.

[Katie Nolan]

That's great. That's where we got engaged.

[Jared Freed]

I think I know.

[Katie Nolan]

Look at this.

[Jared Freed]

Come on. I know.

[Katie Nolan]

He's reading the vibes.

[Jared Freed]

I felt it. You're gonna do something upstate in the fall. No, it's gonna be in the spring because there's less sports going on.

[Katie Nolan]

It's true. It is one of the hard parts.

[Jared Freed]

But it'll be cooler because it's gonna be a little cheaper. You're gonna keep it on the cheap side.

[Katie Nolan]

Thank you.

[Jared Freed]

And then it's gonna be like, wear no dress. There's gonna be no dress code.

[Katie Nolan]

Naked.

[Jared Freed]

Naked. Everyone go naked. Everyone. Adam and Eve style. Queen, Lord intended.

[Katie Nolan]

That's right. And only fruit that you have to pick from a tree. You have to pick it. It's the opposite of that.

[Jared Freed]

I see you guys having great food at the wedding. What? I see. Great dance floor, bad food.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay. Wow. Ouch.

[Jared Freed]

You just don't seem like eaters. I'm just gonna. Look at me. I know you guys enough. But not.

[Katie Nolan]

We aren't eaters of high quality.

[Jared Freed]

We eat garbage.

[Isabella]

Last night.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, no.

[Jared Freed]

Don't make me say this is my grandma's favorite game when she was alive. Rest in peace, Georgia.

[Katie Nolan]

Rest in peace.

[Jared Freed]

She loved. What'd you eat for dinner?

[Katie Nolan]

What did I eat for dinner last night?

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

This should be easier than it is.

[Jared Freed]

I don't remember. No. Sometimes it's hard. I get that.

[Katie Nolan]

Last night we had Greek.

[Jared Freed]

You're more eaters than I thought you were. Thank you. That's my new TikTok show. Are you an eater? Right. Ask you your dinner, and at the end, I go eater.

[Katie Nolan]

Nice. Your brother, the. Your brother.

[Jared Freed]

The brother. Your brother that sucks on his blanket and shoves.

[Katie Nolan]

That's the one who is the director of research and analytics for the Chicago Bears.

[Brady]

Huge.

[Katie Nolan]

Sucked on his blanket.

[Jared Freed]

This is why I have this realization about my fandom, is because now I'm this huge Bears fan that, like, I know about the players. I'm very involved.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

You watch every game. I watch the game differently than I did. You know, there was a Patriots time where, like, it got to the point with the Patriots where it was like.

[Katie Nolan]

Like, if they didn't win, you were upset.

[Jared Freed]

It was like, expecting. It was like having a son who's an Olympian. You're like. Like, you'd have friends be like, congrats on the. The. The world Trials. I'd be like, yeah, who cares? I've done that.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

You know, like, we took it for granted. Right? And now the Patriots are fun to watch again. A little bit. But I am a Bears. Like, this is life or death. This is family. This is blood. I need them to win. I'm emotional about it. I. I can't. You know, bad play calls. I'm like, like, getting mad at play calls again. It's like finding my youth. Like, I. I. Because my brother was with the Dolphins. Yeah. Soder's friend fired his ass.

[Katie Nolan]

He did. Is that really what happened?

[Jared Freed]

It's not that. My family cheers against Mike McDaniels and the Dolphins.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, it's McDaniel. So you better get that. Right.

[Jared Freed]

We are anti dolphins in this house.

[Katie Nolan]

So he really did fire.

[Jared Freed]

I don't think it was a fire. Let's just say he didn't keep him. Wow. So he was, like, with Flores, and we love Brian Flores in this house. In this house. And then he got hired by Eber Fl.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

To Chicago. My brother met his wife, his bride, in Miami. She's a sports reporter herself.

[Katie Nolan]

Wife is.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah. My brother cheated on Ibrah's. His wife.

[Katie Nolan]

No. I was like, what? This is tea.

[Jared Freed]

People might not think that's a. That's a joke. My brother met. Why? I don't know my brother's wife. I went along with the fucking improv yesterday.

[Katie Nolan]

No, I was asking a genuine question.

[Jared Freed]

My brother married a woman named Ruthie Polinski, who was the sports woman on NBC in Miami.

[Katie Nolan]

Great.

[Jared Freed]

They met because she went on a.

[Katie Nolan]

Podcast, what a Modern Love Story.

[Jared Freed]

Oh, this is crazy. I went on a podcast called the Latke Room, a Jewish sports podcast. Which Latke.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

Shout out to those guys. Johnny. There you go.

[Katie Nolan]

He has no. He.

[Jared Freed]

He's gonna listen to this.

[Katie Nolan]

He read your name out of his phone before he got here, and he still got it wrong.

[Jared Freed]

I really it up the locker room. Those guys are great. They asked me to come on in the pandemic. I do this interview with them, and it's a sports Jewish podcast. You know, these are Jews who care about their own Adam Sandler. No. So then I talk about my sports life a little bit with them, and I'm like, I shouldn't even be here. I'm a fat loser.

[Katie Nolan]

Her.

[Jared Freed]

You should get my brother on. He's in sports. And then I call my brother, and I'm like. And I was trying to work on how to talk about myself because I. You know that, like, thing where you go on a podcast? You're like, I got to talk about myself.

[Katie Nolan]

Yes.

[Jared Freed]

So I call Harry. I go, go listen to this podcast. These idiots, you know, they're hockey. They were professional hockey players. Jewish professional hockey players.

[Katie Nolan]

I gotta look this podcast up.

[Jared Freed]

I think it's done now. But they had, like, the guest list was crazy. Like, they got everyone. I think they had one guy on that was Jewish. Then they didn't, like. Like Doug Greenblatt, I think they had on. And they were like, so you're Jewish? And he was like, no. Like, it was like. It was like a disaster. It's a fun listen.

[Katie Nolan]

Very funny.

[Jared Freed]

So I was like, harry, go listen to this podcast. You got to hear these idiots. And the next episode Was his now wife. So he listens to the podcast with Ruthie, and she's like, I'm moving from Providence. She was on the news in Providence. I'm moving to Miami for this big job with the sports, with the. The. The NBC station. And he hears her whole life story. They both went to Michigan.

[Katie Nolan]

Wow.

[Jared Freed]

You know, so they. And then they match on hinge, like, within a week of her moving there. So in the pandemic, they meet and he already knows the whole story. He's like, already, like, it's a beautiful story.

[Katie Nolan]

It feels like meant to be.

[Jared Freed]

Be shared. That's what they say. Us Jews at not Adam Sandler. So we. They. So then he gets hired by Chicago. She's from St. Louis. They kind of of moved to the Midwest. She's now with a station in Chicago. And now he's with the Bears and sick. He. Then Ben Johnson comes in because Hebrew flutes gets let go. And there's a little bit, like, when.

[Katie Nolan]

You were nervous, we were like, they might McDaniel me.

[Jared Freed]

We are nervous. And Ben Johnson, like, came in and they knew each other from Miami.

[Katie Nolan]

Look at that.

[Jared Freed]

Because he. He, you know, was with the team with Miami when the. During the Flores days. So he's now. He's loving, you know, he's very happy. I know. I. I don't want to speak for him too much, because NFL stuff, people get, like, real crazy.

[Katie Nolan]

They do. But Director of research and analytics. It's like a big job name.

[Jared Freed]

That's like a legit headset during the game.

[Katie Nolan]

Yes.

[Jared Freed]

So, you know, it's a big job. And we all watch. You know, I'm watching in Boca with my parents and, like, my dad and I. My dad's like, what the fuck is he doing? Like, we're blaming my brother. Like, it's like, very funny. Like, if there was a video of us watching the game, like, the texts are crazy. Wouldn't have done that. And he, like, doesn't even have his phone.

[Katie Nolan]

So the poor guy's like, you guys have no idea what you're talking about.

[Jared Freed]

Well, that's what's so hard. Because after the game, I don't know when to call them.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. Right.

[Jared Freed]

I don't want to, like, call and like. And after, if they lose, I'm, like, avoiding the call.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

Because now I gotta, like, talk them off a ledge. Yeah, this. But right now, 4 and 2, we're very happy. We hope for the bet. We were 4 and 2 last season, too. So I get a lot of people that are like, what? What Bears. How'd that happen? I'm like, it makes sense. It makes sense.

[Katie Nolan]

I have Dolphins merch.

[Jared Freed]

I'm sure you do.

[Katie Nolan]

In my house.

[Jared Freed]

Right? That's hard. And people, especially you, I know you as Boston.

[Katie Nolan]

And I said to Dan, I was like, I look, I'm happy for your friend. I get that you're going to root for the team. It sounded very similar to when you were talking about rooting for the Bears. And it meaning more because this is your. This means more to you. It's connected, but in a different way. So I was very understanding, but I was like, just don't get. Just with the merch. Let's not bring a lot of merch into the house. It's a division ride rival. And I'm not. I just don't wanna. And at first he was great. And then like second season, I think he. He went a little nuts. He bought like a nice sweatshirt that he really like, which now he's going, if I gotta get rid of this, I'm getting rid of it. The day that it's hard happens.

[Jared Freed]

I went big on the Dolphins when Harry was there because I was buying all the old school stuff because they've.

[Katie Nolan]

Got the cool dog, the little dolphin with the helmet.

[Jared Freed]

Oh, so good. So now I bought a bunch of Chicago's stuff and I'm heavy on that.

[Katie Nolan]

It's good stuff.

[Jared Freed]

I gotta get. I have one Miami hat left and I wear it sometimes. And he gets mad at me, you know?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. How dare you. That's like calling your ex and talking. Because we, look, we maintain a relationship. You guys were together for a long. Okay, I wouldn't have led with that. But maybe that's why you stay in touch with your brother's ex. I don't know your family dynamic. You were, you were a D line. This is what I. Is this where we talk about Needham? Framingham? Because was it Framingham where you got a touchdown?

[Jared Freed]

I scored. I intercepted a ball and ran it back 14 yards for a touchdown. All 14 of them as a D liner.

[Katie Nolan]

Incredible defensive tackle. Yeah, incredible.

[Isabella]

Not an end.

[Jared Freed]

Inside defensive end.

[Katie Nolan]

And so then I assume your team gave you a nickname.

[Jared Freed]

No, I gave myself a nickname.

[Katie Nolan]

Great.

[Jared Freed]

We won 14, seven. Okay, so we're at Needham Rockets, Framingham Flyers. Under the lights, and in Framingham. In Framingham.

[Katie Nolan]

So about it.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

You were playing at Bowditch Field under the lights.

[Jared Freed]

It was like one of the few base state carry division people that had teams that had lights at the time.

[Katie Nolan]

We didn't have a very Good football team. But we did have lights.

[Jared Freed]

Don't take this away from me.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, sorry.

[Jared Freed]

So I.

[Katie Nolan]

We were. We were stacked that year, if I recall correctly.

[Jared Freed]

Stacked, stacked. And I played football my whole life. I played Since I was 8 years old, Pop Warner. And I think I, you know, it's a big part of my life. I took a couple years off when I was younger in Pop Warner. Then I came back to it, which isn't very like me. I'm usually one to just stick it through, but I was like. It was more a part of my life than I would have ever really thought about until now. Do you know what I mean? Like, I. I don't think people would say that about me, but it was more a part of my life. Like, I don't think if they were like, oh, Jared, that guy played football his whole life.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

I don't think. I wouldn't say that. But you feel embarrassed hours to say that.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Because, like, I'm not a.

[Katie Nolan]

Like, don't make me show you.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

I wasn't great at it.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

I did it.

[Jared Freed]

I did well. I was. I played and I played D line my whole life, too. So I played one position the whole time. I did it. So by the time high school came, I was like, playing. You know, that's what I do. That's what I like to do. And I. I was okay. I thought I was okay. And then this. I was a junior in high school. We're playing Framingham. Quarterback. Does a. Like a wagon.

[Katie Nolan]

What year is this?

[Jared Freed]

This is 2000. This is. This is the embarrassing part. Anytime I tell the story, it is like Al Bundy talking about his 10 touchdowns.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm just trying to place for myself. If I danced at this football game.

[Jared Freed]

You might have 2002.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

That's fucking.

[Jared Freed]

We were in the same place.

[Katie Nolan]

That's weird now. That's weird now.

[Jared Freed]

This is like back in the day.

[Katie Nolan]

I don't like this now. I actually feel uncomfortable with this. 2002, I. No, no.

[Jared Freed]

I graduated in 03, so I was a junior in 2002, and I was.

[Katie Nolan]

A freshman in 2001.

[Jared Freed]

2001, I was.

[Katie Nolan]

So wait, what month of was it? Post 9. 11.

[Jared Freed]

If I graduated in 2003 and then my first year of college was 2003, it would have been so 2022 would have been my senior year. 20. So it was 2021.

[Katie Nolan]

That wouldn't have been 2021. I wish it was 2001.

[Jared Freed]

It was 2001. I'm sorry.

[Katie Nolan]

It was just Last year.

[Brady]

Last year.

[Jared Freed]

I was just chilling.

[Katie Nolan]

It feels like maybe it would have been 2001 or 2000.

[Jared Freed]

No, 2001. I was a junior then.

[Katie Nolan]

I. Then that was my freshman year. And I would have been on the dance team. And I would have been dancing at the Framingham High football game with my pom pom. With my pom poms.

[Jared Freed]

You were the one crying.

[Isabella]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Going. Now he's going to run it back all 14 yards.

[Jared Freed]

Well, I'm winning the big one.

[Katie Nolan]

Don't let the big guy score a touchdown.

[Jared Freed]

That's what I would have said.

[Katie Nolan]

He's a lineman.

[Jared Freed]

How could you have this happen, for Christ's sakes? QB does a waggle. He goes from his. They snap the ball. I'm on the right side. And then he goes. He does a.

[Brady]

From.

[Jared Freed]

They snap the ball. And he pulls out his left.

[Katie Nolan]

Hot sports talk. I love this.

[Jared Freed]

And then I shimmy, shimmy down the line. I see him going left. I'm like, forget the pursuit. I gotta pursue angles now. Cause I'm thinking I'm gonna meet him when he starts running. So I start going right, my right as I shimmy, shimmy. He goes back with the ball to throw it to the fullback, who's behind me. I reach up out of the sky, I pull it down, rumble, stumble. I turn to the crowd, big fist pump. And then I sprint to the sidelines. Do no dance. Do nothing other than the fist bump, bump. Needham goes on to win 14 7. Now, this happened before halftime. I'll never forget, which is when I performed. You're performing. So you're out in the field dancing.

[Katie Nolan]

To the band, just trying to make it work.

[Jared Freed]

So K2 future celebrities.

[Katie Nolan]

That's right. Me on the kick line.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And you running a. Look at that.

[Jared Freed]

So then I go in the. I'll never forget it. We go into the locker room and it's like, we're up 14, 7. Everyone's like, yeah, you know, going crazy. And I remember there's two guys that are seniors that are like twins. And I remember, like, I over. Like, in my mind, I'm like, well, let me go back a little bit, please, because we got caught up in your dancing. It was my fault.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm so sorry. I was pretty hot.

[Jared Freed]

I came off the field, I go, hey, guys, you see that hot chick.

[Katie Nolan]

Dancing in her turtleneck?

[Jared Freed]

So I come off to the sidelines. My two friends who weren't, they didn't play as much as me. Me, I go, did you see that? I was like, like, yeah, look at me. I scored. And they look at me. They go, oh, was that you? We thought that was Mulligan. Excuse me, Ben Mulligan, who called Mully, he goes, we thought that was Mully's touchdown. And I go. And they're like, with me. They're like, not giving me my moment. And I'm like, you guys are pieces of. He's like, no, we saw Molly's touchdown. Pretty good touchdown by him. And I'm like, you dickheads. I'm so mad.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

We go to the locker again. Like, it's one of those things where you're like, thank God these are still my friends to this day. So it's funny, surprising to me. Still giving me shit.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

So as they should. I would do the same thing to them.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure.

[Jared Freed]

We go off the. To the. Halftime comes, we go in the locker room, these twins who are older, I've played football with them my whole life. Life. They're going, jared Freed scored. Are you kidding me? They're like, talking about it as if, like, the Make a wish kid scored. They're like, jared, he scored.

[Katie Nolan]

Freed.

[Jared Freed]

It was like reading YouTube comments, noticing something that you never noticed. It was, like, so honest. Of, like, of all the people of anyone to score. I'm like, I start on this team.

[Katie Nolan]

What do you play every day?

[Jared Freed]

I've been playing with you since I've been eight years old. Like, the idea. And I'm like, I'm getting chills as I tell this because I'm like, I was so annoyed. I'm like, have I misremembered my whole existence?

[Katie Nolan]

Are you gaslighting me?

[Jared Freed]

Right? Am I like, am I being told that I was like, this slob, loser, unathletic kid? They're like, jared, for of all the people who would have Scott. Can you believe it? And then, like, one of them was like, I've never even intercepted a ball for a touchdown, and I'm the best. And you're like, oh, my God. And I was like, this is the worst thing that ever happened to me. And now I got to hear how everyone really thinks about me.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. So instead of them celebrating how great I am, you have your friends pretending it was somebody else. And the people who do know that it was you are. Are in complete disbelief because of how untalented they perceived you to be.

[Jared Freed]

Right. Thank you for spelling it out. More horrifying than I've ever.

[Katie Nolan]

Horrible.

[Jared Freed]

So then the game end, and I remember I started calling myself TD Freed.

[Katie Nolan]

It hurts me to hear you say the phrase. I started Calling myself.

[Jared Freed]

I started calling myself TD Freed to fuck with my friends who wouldn't acknowledge that I scored. I would call myself TD Freed any chance I got to the point where I called myself it so much that a year goes by. We had this math teacher who I was in one class and my friends were in another. The ones that wouldn't give me because.

[Katie Nolan]

They were dumb and you were smart.

[Jared Freed]

Right. I'm an AP and there. And, you know, I was regular. So. No, it's probably the other way around. I went to Penn State. They went to, like, Bowden. So I. They go. The teacher, at one point, I guess I was calling myself TD Freed so much that I came up in their class and they go, yeah, Jared Freed. And he goes, td. And they were so mad. That's so funny that it got like all. A year later, a teacher that has.

[Katie Nolan]

Nothing to do td. I know td.

[Jared Freed]

I know td.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, yeah. Remember in that game in Framingham?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah. Scored the winning touchdown.

[Katie Nolan]

Crazy.

[Jared Freed]

The winning touchdown.

[Katie Nolan]

Congratulations.

[Jared Freed]

These chairs are going to make me hate my body. Watch this on YouTube.

[Katie Nolan]

I think you're going to look fun.

[Jared Freed]

Anyone comments that I will come to your house and I will find you.

[Katie Nolan]

It's just clips, so.

[Jared Freed]

Oh, it's just clips.

[Katie Nolan]

Full thing's not out at any time soon.

[Jared Freed]

If you're listening and you comment on Spotify.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

My fat stomach.

[Katie Nolan]

And no one's going to say you look fantastic. Cut it out.

[Jared Freed]

Do I look thin?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, you look.

[Jared Freed]

I didn't like the way you said that.

[Katie Nolan]

Can I. Nick?

[Jared Freed]

Okay.

[Katie Nolan]

You look thinner than you did last time I saw you.

[Jared Freed]

That is even worse than hearing.

[Katie Nolan]

But I don't think of you as not thin. I think you look trimmer than you did last time.

[Jared Freed]

I was just with my parents and all they talk about is my weight and that's like gaslighting.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, you can't be around that. That's.

[Jared Freed]

Well, I moved to Delray to be closer to my parents and.

[Katie Nolan]

That's very kind of you, but you got to also protect your face.

[Jared Freed]

I get a lot of free meals out of it. Yeah, well.

[Katie Nolan]

That'S. You know, maybe if you had to pay for them.

[Jared Freed]

You're about to hear this headphone bumble. The headphone fumble of a guy leaving. Thank you. No, I feel good. I'm layered. It's good. This is great weather for my body.

[Katie Nolan]

Perfect. I've been waiting for this weather. Because you don't. Otherwise you're just like, I gotta show these arms again.

[Jared Freed]

No, it's average body shape.

[Katie Nolan]

It's just not in the mood. This is time for the layers. We've made it layers.

[Jared Freed]

No jacket. That's the king of looks.

[Katie Nolan]

Do you care about the World Series Series? It's starting on Friday.

[Jared Freed]

I care about Ohtani just because I think you have to care about him as a figure in sports. I don't care about the World Series. I think it's sad what's happened to baseball because I love going to a baseball game.

[Katie Nolan]

What's happened?

[Jared Freed]

Just that it's not like, I don't know the personalities. It feels personality less like I, I, I like storylines. I mean, again, I'm not that different than most people. I think like with football, every week a storyline, I think baseball, the storyline becomes too math ridden and the nerds have taken over. And I don't care about warp and bloop and fart.

[Katie Nolan]

Fart is the only predictive stat on mvp.

[Jared Freed]

You gotta have a good fart.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. If your fart is through the roof.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

I, I don't know. I just don't care. I want like Pedro throwing a ball at someone's head. Like, I, I want, want that like.

[Katie Nolan]

The rough edges more than the perfectly. You know, the math does bug me too.

[Jared Freed]

It's, but why are we, you know, it's like to me, it's like listening. It's like when you quote an inner an Instagram commenter in a, in a news report. Like.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. People are freaking out. Like three people on Twitter, they got barely any engagement on the post.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

It's like you wrote the article before you had the proof.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And then you found it.

[Jared Freed]

I just don't like that at all. So.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, I'm with that.

[Jared Freed]

I think sometimes with baseball, it becomes more of the story than it actually is.

[Katie Nolan]

I think that the reason for the numbers, if I may offer any perspective, is there is a, a section of the fan base that really appeals to. And there are people who like baseball in a very numbersy way. And I, and I love that they have access to all of that stuff. My issue is where it's like, I don't, that's not how everybody consumes baseball.

[Jared Freed]

Let me, let me hit back at you. The numbers, I think are important to people in baseball because they were about the history.

[Katie Nolan]

Straight.

[Jared Freed]

But a lot of these numbers are new.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

So I guess you could go back and find out what like Willie, Willie Mays warp was.

[Katie Nolan]

Is that what I think it's war. I think you're going for war. But it's like war, like, like bloop. Is like when you hit a ball and it doesn't go all the way.

[Jared Freed]

It's like now I'm like Bill Belichick.

[Katie Nolan]

Calling it the Insta face.

[Jared Freed]

The Insta face, yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Well, then you just got to date somebody. Somebody who is how old? She's 40. She's in her 20s. We don't really know for sure. And he's in his 70s.

[Jared Freed]

Imagine if, like, you were told this is.

[Katie Nolan]

What's.

[Jared Freed]

This is like, this is actually turning into the. This is. The Patriots are turning into the family that won the lottery, that the money just got too big.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Because. And it's Tom and Bill.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Like Tom Brady.

[Katie Nolan]

You know, Tom needs love. Tom needs to find a woman.

[Jared Freed]

I don't think that's what he needs. I don't know what he needs. I. His. It's like. Like Tom Brady. I just saw a video of him talking about how he's going to Riyadh to play flag football. And he's talk. And he goes, his excellence. He referred to the king of Saudi Arabia as his excellence. And I was like, is that AI. I was like, I don't know what this is.

[Katie Nolan]

I felt like, mostly disappointment over how. And this is. Everyone's entitled to their own opinion. Here's mine. How willing everybody has been to bend a knee to them that for money. It's just been very oddly happy to do anything for you, as long as it's for a check. That I can then say, like, you'd do it for a check.

[Jared Freed]

You do it.

[Katie Nolan]

And it's like, well, I don't think I. I think people need to believe in the idea that somebody might not do it. We need that.

[Jared Freed]

Right. Well, you know, I keep hearing this perspective on the Riyadh thing of like, oh, we're pushing their culture a little bit forward.

[Katie Nolan]

Forward.

[Jared Freed]

But then, isn't it. I was thinking about this last night. Is. Couldn't the argument to that be. And listen, I'm not, like, sitting here like trash. Whatever did.

[Katie Nolan]

We'll move on very quickly.

[Jared Freed]

I think it's. I think it's more. I think it's worth discussing as a. Like a philosophical debate. I hate when these, like. I love a gnaw on the bone.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

I don't like when someone's like, let me just label them the worst human alive. So I feel good. I'm not doing that.

[Katie Nolan]

Great.

[Jared Freed]

I will. But I would say, like. Like the feedback to we're pushing their culture forward would be, well, aren't you showing that you bend, like, the knee bend that you just explained. Aren't you showing that their king owns you?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, they're literally paying.

[Jared Freed]

Like, he. He invited. He didn't invite a bunch of clean comics who do what he wants done by his people. He invited the edgiest comics in the world to not be edgy at his demand.

[Katie Nolan]

And that's why the price tag's so high.

[Jared Freed]

But. But that shows. Look at how powerful our king is.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

He can make the guy who will say anything say a few less things. So from that perspective, you go, you're not pushing culture forward. You're showing how powerful their king is. And also, money walks, bullshit talks. Or bunny talks, bullshit walks.

[Katie Nolan]

Bringing up the people as if you are selling tickets to them and that you're not. You're being paid by the government. You're being literally paid by the government to be there.

[Jared Freed]

That's. That's a. That's a whole in that argument as well. But. But that also goes to the argument that I just brought up. Like, you're not. You're not like, speaking truth. They didn't find you on YouTube.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

The King did and said, let me show you what I'll do to these YouTube monsters.

[Katie Nolan]

And look, whatever.

[Jared Freed]

I don't know. Is this un.

[Katie Nolan]

Anything can happen.

[Jared Freed]

Well, Tom Brady taking the money to do.

[Katie Nolan]

And not just Tom Brady, Gronk, also active current players who are really good, like Saquon Barkley. I don't have the list in front of me, but off top of my head, I feel like it was. Feel like Christian McCaffrey maybe was involved.

[Jared Freed]

I don't know. That's where it gets difficult to, like, talk crap about. Like, my friend Nimash Patel got invited. He. And then didn't go. And I love Nemes. And I'm like, good for you. Like, making a decision on your own. But then you see people in his comments being like, hope you do some soul searching. It's like that loop Loser. Like, I hate them all.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. I. That's kind of where I net out with most things now, which is a frustrating. But I just go, like, I just look at Dan and Myrtle, my dog and my fiance, and I go, like, I'll just focus like this, you know, if I just stay right here, everything's perfect and great.

[Jared Freed]

Well, that's why, you know, that's probably how you'd be if you met. Like, that's why the Internet is really like a hellscape. It's like, it's. You've taken all of the humanity out of it, and it's Just the hateful people part. If you knew these people, if you knew Tom Brady and you talk with them at dinner and he was like, explain the whole thing.

[Katie Nolan]

Tried.

[Jared Freed]

Did you. No.

[Katie Nolan]

I mean, I've tried to know Tom Brady my whole life, I think.

[Jared Freed]

Well, I. I used to talk about Tom Brady as an inspirational figure, and I do believe you can. Again, this goes back to fandom versus having to deal with reality. Like, I remember, like, you know, Tom Brady. I was like, what a inspirational guy. Like, look at his story. Just because he's dating the supermodel now doesn't mean that he didn't, like, work. Like, it's all about hard work. And that.

[Katie Nolan]

That.

[Jared Freed]

And then, like, I remember I said this and, like, I think it was Juliet Lippman, who I've become friendly with, and she's like. She was like. He also, like, left his pregnant wife.

[Katie Nolan]

Ew. That. We're bringing up that piece.

[Jared Freed]

I go. And I go, yeah, I guess I didn't think of that. Yeah, you know, like, you know, you think of the whole story.

[Katie Nolan]

You go, but that was like, six faces ago, so that doesn't count. Tom doesn't get dinged for that now. It's a different guy. He's been through witness protection at this point.

[Jared Freed]

I bet you he's got to be a fun dude.

[Katie Nolan]

I think. I think maybe deep down somewhere where he's tried a strawberry, you know, it's just. He's like, not.

[Jared Freed]

He's still on that.

[Katie Nolan]

I think he has changed. I think when he went to Tampa Bay, he, like, didn't he get hammered after they won? And he, like, he's. It was embarrassing.

[Jared Freed]

That's the problem. He's definitely the guy who drinks tequila on the rocks and tells you how it's the. Like, not. It's like, the best way you can have alcohol. Like, he explains to you the health.

[Katie Nolan]

Benefits of the alcohol calories of this actually end up being negative because of the. How much your body.

[Isabella]

That guy.

[Jared Freed]

How the sugar is different than the other sugar.

[Katie Nolan]

Yawn, snooze. He was great at football. He led my football team to some of the happiest. All of the happiest football moments I've had as a sports fan, and I'm so grateful to him for that. And then that's pretty much where my defense of him.

[Jared Freed]

I know. Well, this is the Wiz is exactly. Goes back to the quote. It's hard to be just blind faith anymore. And maybe that's the Internet. Maybe that's moving out of. Out of. Out of The Boston area. Like. Like, there's nowhere worse for Blind Faith than Buffalo, New York. Like, have you ever been to Buffalo?

[Katie Nolan]

If so, by accident.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Don't go, no.

[Katie Nolan]

And I like their. I think their fans are actually getting screwed right now by their team because they're opening a new stadium and they're like, where's the stadium pricing? It's going to be right near, I think across the street from their other stadium.

[Jared Freed]

Okay. Oh, and it's going to be like.

[Katie Nolan]

Two, but it's like nicer. And now they're like selling. You know, the way they do that, I forget what they're called, but they sell you these. The. The right to bid on a seat.

[Jared Freed]

So they're getting every dollar.

[Katie Nolan]

They're just pricing people out of it in a way that you're like, but Buffalo, what have you done? What have you given these fans? Not a lot of moments where they get to. But they still show up and they're so passionate. They're nuts. They're out of their minds. They throw each other through tables. Like, give them something.

[Jared Freed]

You know, it's going to be. Here's where I'll. Here's where it's going to end up, is that they're going to say, you can only jump through tables that we sell to you.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, no.

[Jared Freed]

You know, it's going to be like, hey, you got to buy the clear bag to put your stuff into. Right. The minute they start charging for parking spots in a way that becomes detrimental to the fan that's showing up just for the parking lot, that's where it's really like, become too self aware. But you go to Buffalo, they're very self conscious as a people. And they all ask you, they're like, so what do you think of the Bills? Do you like the Bills? And I'm like, why would I like the Bills?

[Katie Nolan]

Why would I like the Bills?

[Jared Freed]

They'll go, what do you think of Buffalo? Do you like Buffalo? And I'm like, I don't know. I could, I guess.

[Katie Nolan]

Good wings.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, the wings are good. I can understand why someone would live here.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure.

[Jared Freed]

Like, but like, that's more than I.

[Katie Nolan]

Think most people would say, right?

[Jared Freed]

I'm like, listen, you know this from Dan. When we travel the country.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Everyone is very concerned with, like, do you like us? Do you like this town?

[Katie Nolan]

Are you mad at us?

[Jared Freed]

Or they'll shit on their own town. I'm like, I get why someone would live anywhere. I live in Delray Beach.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. Crazy to me, it's crazy.

[Jared Freed]

Delray Beach. I mean I could go on and on. I mean I could be on the tourism bureau. You could.

[Katie Nolan]

It's that good. What's great about it? Give me the top one thing.

[Jared Freed]

One thing. The best weekend vacation for someone living in the Northeast during the winter that you could ever take.

[Katie Nolan]

And where is it?

[Jared Freed]

In the half hour south of Palm Beach Airport. So you can get on a $200 flight from wherever in the Northeast to Palm Beach. PBI the best airport in the world.

[Katie Nolan]

World.

[Jared Freed]

And in 25 minutes you're at your hotel. In 40 minutes you're on the beach.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

Wouldn't that be nice?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, but it is in Florida.

[Jared Freed]

Oh, don't do the Florida thing.

[Katie Nolan]

Why not? The Florida thing is a thing for a reason.

[Jared Freed]

The Florida thing is so overdone, it's getting me annoyed.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay, fair.

[Jared Freed]

Because every time I say I move to Florida it's always like the most like cartoonishly looking liberal person going really?

[Katie Nolan]

I mean. And you go are you calling me cartoonishly liberal?

[Jared Freed]

No, because I didn't expect it for from you.

[Katie Nolan]

Great. Okay, fair. I actually I also did button my shirt all the way to the top today. A little cartoonishly liberal.

[Jared Freed]

It's a little I, I.

[Katie Nolan]

It's just early for you to move to Florida is what I'm is what I'm saying.

[Jared Freed]

This is the thing about Delray Beach. Everyone outside of it thinks it's old cuz they only visit their grandparents there. Everyone in Florida thinks it's too young because there's a lot of college kids there.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

Cuz FAU is nearby and all those things. It is actually appropriately aged for us. It is food. Boo boo for us by us.

[Katie Nolan]

Wow. And that's what they meant when they said they were thinking it was exactly the two of us.

[Jared Freed]

That's when they came up with campaign.

[Katie Nolan]

Was about can we talk about Mel Owens?

[Jared Freed]

You want to talk about mellow?

[Katie Nolan]

I do. Let's talk Mellowens golden bachelor former Rams linebacker. We got. I remember the announcement that 66 year old. This was at the time of the show they were doing gold match. 66 year old former Rams linebacker was going to be the new golden back bachelor. And I remember being like first of all, I don't know. I. There's just there are concerns we've learned about what happens to a person who's been in football for a long time.

[Jared Freed]

Okay.

[Katie Nolan]

As they get older my first thought was like I don't know if the aged linebacker is like the pro. I don't know if that's like a But I don't know. I digress. Let me focus on my point.

[Jared Freed]

I never would have thought of that.

[Katie Nolan]

He went on a podcast before his season. Maybe it had filmed already.

[Jared Freed]

This is the perfect podcast for me to talk about this, please.

[Katie Nolan]

That's why I'm dying to talk about this. He went on MGO Blue podcast with John Jansen. I have to just. I've got to give it its shine. We are quoting it. And he, he said, they asked me, what's your preferences? This is about the women that were going to be cast.

[Jared Freed]

We'll follow this guy until he dies.

[Katie Nolan]

What's your preference differences? So I just said ages 45 to 60. Just being honest. He recalled. And then we had lunch with the executive producer. I said, you know, if they're 60 or over, I'm cutting them again. 66. At the time he said this, however, the executive producer allegedly told him that would be a no go on the show. Telling him, mel, you can't. This is not the Silver Bachelor. This is the Golden Bachelor. He goes, but they're going to be hot. Don't worry about it. About it.

[Jared Freed]

Let that sit for a second.

[Katie Nolan]

Let that sit for a second.

[Jared Freed]

It's a tough quote. I can't argue the quote first question.

[Katie Nolan]

What the.

[Jared Freed]

Can't argue the diff. The, the, the, the problems with the.

[Katie Nolan]

Quote is golden bachelor, isn't it 60 plus. Isn't that the point of the show or.

[Jared Freed]

So you're bringing this up to let people know if they don't know I am a Bachelor super fan.

[Katie Nolan]

Of course.

[Jared Freed]

Who I assumed they. Maybe they don't. Maybe, you know, they're new to me, new to the jcu, the J Train cinematic universe. I.

[Katie Nolan]

The TD Freed world.

[Jared Freed]

TD Freed. Yeah. So I yell at the Bachelor and it has somehow turned this into me being on the show. I went on the Bachelor, I did a roast of Mel Owens because. And they only had a roast because they're like these quotes. People hate them. We gotta show we can take a joke and kind of cut them at the knees a little bit. Which is a good plan if you're good plan. Because when these well produced.

[Katie Nolan]

The Bachelor, one of the most well produced shows.

[Jared Freed]

Everyone who works on the show. I have been. I'm ne. I. And listen, I've been yelling at the Bachelor for years. They never acknowledge me.

[Katie Nolan]

Smart.

[Jared Freed]

Suddenly. Right, right. It's worked for them. Now I'm going on the cruise. They're doing a Bachelor fan cruise. That's sounds like a nightmare show on the cruise. My parents are Coming nightmare. So I can't wait.

[Katie Nolan]

Me and my parents on a cruise. I've done that nightmare.

[Jared Freed]

So. So I get a call like. So they're like, yeah, Mel made these quotes. And I've heard them. And I'm like, they're really bad. Because here's the thing about a dating reality show. You need a little reality in your show. So if you have a man coming on who's claiming I won't date someone over 60.

[Katie Nolan]

Ew. To anybody over 60.

[Jared Freed]

Right. And. And it's mostly women who watch the show who aren't going to like, empathize and try and find the argument and what you're saying. Because what he's saying, you know, the people who defend what he's saying, they're like, you're allowed to like, whoever. You're like 45 to 60, fine. But you sign up for the Golden Bachelor, dude. You sign up for a show about people who are later in life dating now. The quotes are stupid. I went and list. So when they brought me on to do the roast and because I have a vested interest in the show based on yelling at. I want to know everything. I go and listen to that population podcast. That podcast is the most local sports Yahoo podcast I have ever.

[Katie Nolan]

MGO Blue podcast.

[Jared Freed]

Nobody would listen to it.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Like, unless they were like the nerdiest loser Michigan fan. And I'm saying that as my grandfather played football at Michigan. My brother went to Michigan, my sister, the original TD Laker.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

So leather hats and so, so he. I have family from Michigan. They are the biggest Michigan football fans. I. I know that world.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Michigan men are a breed of their own.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

There is nothing. Think of what people would hate about Jim Harbaugh. That's every Michigan alumni, they're super serious. They're super self serious. They are all about business. They're all about, you know, it's always. What's the next.

[Katie Nolan]

What's your point?

[Jared Freed]

My point is Mel goes on this super serious football show. They don't even bring up the Bachelor for the first like 40 minutes of the show. That's the only reason he's on this dog shit podcast. And then whatever his name is. Jojo Jameson.

[Katie Nolan]

It's. Yeah. J. Jonah Jameson. It's John Jansen.

[Jared Freed]

John Jansen. John Jansen. He's like, so what's with this Bachelor thing? Are you out of your fucking mind? The biggest show in the country. What's with this Bachelor thing? And then he talks about it like. He's like, yeah, it's like something he's doing. And you're like, is everyone here nuts?

[Katie Nolan]

Are you guys nuts?

[Jared Freed]

Like, this is the gravity.

[Katie Nolan]

Were we talking about Mel Owens a week before?

[Jared Freed]

No. Right. He's not even on Dog Shit Nerd Michigan podcast.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

To bring it up at the end is, like, actually batshit cuckoo bananas. It is crazy to talk about it as a.

[Katie Nolan]

Before you go, talk about the Bachelor you're doing. And you're like, what? That's the thing I'm here for.

[Jared Freed]

It's the only network show people watch. It is a huge, huge. And. And you're going, hey, so what's this thing? And they talk about it so flippantly. So, like, I. I think that's the most derogatory thing of the. Of the podcast is just him being like. And listen, it felt like, to defend Mel, who I've now met. And I like. And I get, like, why they picked him, because he is, like, at that age without the quotes, he. And without going on tv, like, as a. Like a figure.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. He'd be like, he's handsome. Success.

[Jared Freed]

Physically able. Like, I live in Delray Beach. I hang out with my parents. Friends in Boca. Being able to be active is, like, a huge thing for people in their 60s.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Being, like, able to get up and travel and do pickleball. Play pickleball and be like, a fun guy. Like, Mel can do that on paper. So I get why he got chosen. But plus, having success, not having to work, being on your own schedule. All of these things matter to women in Boca, and I'm sure they matter to all women of that age. He didn't get how big a deal being the Bachelor was like, that this is like an elected position and that there's Cinderella involved in the show. People watch this to see love unfold. This is an inspirational show called A Bachelor.

[Brady]

Especially.

[Katie Nolan]

It is so emotional that first season.

[Jared Freed]

With fuddy duddy Gary, right?

[Katie Nolan]

Screw Gary.

[Jared Freed]

Well, Gary got a bad. I could defend Barry or Gary for years.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

Gary got one unnamed anonymous source saying that he had a bad breakup, and now we just say he's a bad guy.

[Katie Nolan]

Didn't he, like, leave the woman? That was. That he picked, like, right away. I mean, also watching people's families, that he loved them, and then they. I don't know.

[Jared Freed]

We don't know the whole story. Gary production told me they were like.

[Katie Nolan]

Gary might be fine.

[Jared Freed]

I will say this. Like, I'll defend Gary because even when I, like, talk with production, they were like, that guy. We liked him. Like, so.

[Katie Nolan]

Sorry.

[Jared Freed]

I just. That's one you're gonna have to trust me on.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure.

[Jared Freed]

Mel didn't really get that and I think this is to defend Mel. Here's how I would defend Mel in those quotes. When Golden Bachelor was first an idea and not a reality, we all thought of the Golden Girls. We all thought fuddy duddy, old people, people. And then when it actually aired, how.

[Katie Nolan]

Dare you call the Golden Girls fuddy duddy.

[Jared Freed]

We all thought they were fiction icons that came back for them, comedic that came around. Icons that, that I'm not denying.

[Katie Nolan]

Just cuz you didn't want to bang them.

[Jared Freed]

Who said I didn't want to bang them?

[Katie Nolan]

Nice. You're back in.

[Jared Freed]

Thank you. I've been watching the Golden Girls get to sleep at night.

[Katie Nolan]

The best.

[Jared Freed]

It's a really good show.

[Katie Nolan]

It's such a.

[Jared Freed]

Well written, is so good the way.

[Katie Nolan]

They make the story lines into. It's perfect.

[Jared Freed]

It's such a good show. You love, you laugh.

[Katie Nolan]

So you're defending Mel and you. My training need to get to what the defense of him is.

[Jared Freed]

The defense of him is we all had the mind's eye view of what the show would be and then it ended up being fun, vivacious, awesome women with like, like going on their adventure, the Thelma and Louise adventure. And I think Mel was thinking cuz all the comments that I got that were negative about the Golden Bachelor before it aired was this is sad. We're going to watch old people date. And then you saw the show and you were like this isn't sad, it's uplifting. This is uplifting.

[Katie Nolan]

Sad moments.

[Jared Freed]

Right. But this is my parents, my parents aren't old, they're just a little bit older. Like it, it, like it actually made you think of that age differently after watching the show. And I think Mel didn't watch the show and thought of that age even though he is that age. And then we get.

[Katie Nolan]

And then some. He's 66 going any woman over 60? No.

[Jared Freed]

Mel said he's going to work until he's 103 and said it with a straight face and said he's never going to stop working.

[Katie Nolan]

What does he do for work?

[Jared Freed]

He's a lawyer.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh.

[Jared Freed]

So I, when I went on the show I said he was a, a divorced assistant football coach because he also coaches the linebackers at the local high school. But he funny, he, I don't think he understood that's the only defense of his like flippant nature with like making those comments. Cuz like then he goes on the show and you, you see the women, they look amazing. They're fun. I went on, they did the roast. They were great. And I just don't think he's thought very deeply about dating before. He's got two sons. You need a girl dad whose wife has passed.

[Katie Nolan]

That really is that. If you're building it in a lab. It's like dead wife had love, lost love, mourned love, ready to look for love again.

[Jared Freed]

Right. You need. Nothing is more attractive to a woman than a man who has committed to someone who's not here anymore.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

So that's what they had in Gary. And then with this guy, there's a divorce that happened. The wife won't talk to anyone. The ex wife won't talk to anyone. Every time he's asked about the divorce, he gets like. He's like, yeah, the papers are on the table. It just ended. And we're like, we need way more.

[Katie Nolan]

That's gonna need you to be more.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, yeah, we need a lot more. Like, everyone just assumes he just ignored her into divorcing him. Like, that's what I.

[Katie Nolan]

So, so mean.

[Jared Freed]

I'm just saying.

[Katie Nolan]

So to ghost your wife based on.

[Jared Freed]

What we've seen, like, that's kind of like he's left it up to us to, like.

[Katie Nolan]

And that's never a good idea.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

Control the narrative.

[Jared Freed]

Don't leave it up to a audience of 88% women that are looking for.

[Katie Nolan]

A thing to talk about.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

Why would you do that?

[Jared Freed]

I'm a fan of the show, I think. I mean, I've watched every episode twice. I watch them all twice. So I.

[Katie Nolan]

Out of your mind?

[Jared Freed]

Yeah. I love it and it's fun. But Mel, the football player, that. That became, like, part of it. He's just like. He really. Mel loves himself some Mel.

[Katie Nolan]

Great. Someone's gotta.

[Jared Freed]

I mean, it's a bad time to be a Mel on tv. Like, they. They really needed to go back to the Gary. Well, with, like, Fuddy Duddy.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. Just like a sweet older man who understands where he's at in his life and wants a woman for. As a partner to experience love before they head on out.

[Jared Freed]

Because. Well. Yeah. And has to believe, like, we're on our last few years, like, because not. He does not.

[Katie Nolan]

He thinks he's gonna go.

[Jared Freed]

He's 27.

[Katie Nolan]

That's crazy. Somebody should hold a mirror.

[Jared Freed]

I'm saying this as a lover of the show. So if you watch Wednesday night's episode, he does hometowns.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, great.

[Jared Freed]

There is a scene where he is getting questioned by Peg's daughter. That if you want to watch how little he's thought of this whole thing compared to any woman. This daughter should be hired by families to question fiances. She. It was like, I got sweaty.

[Katie Nolan]

I love that.

[Jared Freed]

You got to watch this.

[Katie Nolan]

I love that character's daughter.

[Jared Freed]

And then she's like, like. And she's appropriate. She's not mean. She's just totally, like, down the middle. And afterwards, she's like, I think he's a good man. He didn't give answers. I would have liked. You know, he. She's like, perfect. I actually, like, have so much this woman. I was like, watching. I'm like, good for her. She's defending her mom.

[Katie Nolan]

She's single.

[Jared Freed]

No. She had her boyfriend there who didn't even shave for the fucking show.

[Katie Nolan]

How dare he? You'd be better for her. Thank you. Him.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

She's not Jewish. I don't think.

[Katie Nolan]

Sorry.

[Jared Freed]

I don't think we'd be a match.

[Katie Nolan]

I will say about the Golden Bachelor, what I do like is it the different dynamic it presents for familiar situations. For viewers of the bachelor franchise. For example, hometowns. The energy, you know you're getting in hometowns on a regular bachelor or bachelorette is you're gonna go meet their parents. Maybe an aunt or an uncle or grandparent who means a lot to them. Maybe a brother or a sister. Everybody's kind of being a little phony because they're all kind of like this hot, young, 26 year. Is one of your three favorite 26 year olds. Exactly. This is amazing. It's true love for Golden Bachelor. It's like you're meeting their children who were made by the mom who either passed away or there was a divorce. They are also looking at you to make sure you're not here to take their dad for or like, to take their. The. The. Their mom for, like, all the money. You know what I mean? They have a connection to. And then you're getting interrogated by them in a way that would produce somebody like Peg's daughter who's, like, giving you the business. Cause it's not your dad who's worried about you. It's your child worried about their parent.

[Jared Freed]

Peg's daughter has sat at a few brunch tables.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

She is trained, ready, willing, and able to question Mel Owens in a way he has never been questioned before. Clearly, Mel Owens has two boys. Like, he has never talked more about a woman in his life. He's never talked about his love life. All he's been asked by his two boys is, is she hot. That's it. And it was so fun to watch. And. Yeah. No hometowns. Yeah. There's like, they. And even like the, The. The. The children of. They've also watched their parents date. They know. They know their parents dating habits and problems. Just like more so than the parents of the regular age bachelor.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. Because they're not in on all that knowledge.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

But when you're a kid looking at your parent, I mean, they've been around while it's been happening. I.

[Jared Freed]

It is. You're so right. And I love. I mean, I love hometowns on all bachelor shows because it's people on TV who'd never wanted to be on tv, which is like the best people to have on tv.

[Katie Nolan]

I agree.

[Jared Freed]

And it's just great. But I don't. You know, they had like the grandma and her mom was there and her hair's all over the place and she looked like she was electrocuted. It was like.

[Katie Nolan]

I love it. No hair and makeup. I love it.

[Jared Freed]

I love the show. Be a person. I had so much fun watching. Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And we have fun watching you watch it. That's the. Mostly the way you follow me on Instagram as I watch.

[Jared Freed]

I mean, I still need a. Still need a button on that story.

[Brady]

You do follow. Jared.

[Katie Nolan]

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

[Jared Freed]

Would have been awkward.

[Katie Nolan]

Thank God. And there's no way for you to tell if I have you muted.

[Jared Freed]

You didn't have to bring it up.

[Katie Nolan]

Why would I.

[Jared Freed]

You didn't have to bring it up.

[Katie Nolan]

I do want to give us. Because we are long winded, something clippable because we gotta show the people how much fun we had so that they'll come here.

[Jared Freed]

We gotta do an ad and watch that.

[Katie Nolan]

Absolutely not. But essentially.

[Jared Freed]

Do I look thin?

[Katie Nolan]

You look so thin.

[Jared Freed]

Okay.

[Katie Nolan]

There is a. If you took your left hand and reached under your seat, there is a vase full of flags that I need you to pull up and put on your table.

[Jared Freed]

There we go.

[Katie Nolan]

Amazing. That little bouquet there.

[Jared Freed]

Oh, I get to throw a red flag.

[Katie Nolan]

They're challenge flags. Now the.

[Jared Freed]

This is what my brother does.

[Katie Nolan]

I know.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Wait, he throws the. He's the one who throws the flag.

[Jared Freed]

No, no, no. He's on the headset.

[Katie Nolan]

But he's one who goes. We should challenge that.

[Jared Freed]

He's just discussing it. He's part of the.

[Katie Nolan]

So in baseball, when they do this is that they're. They're. Yeah, I get it.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

So it's. It's kind of blending the concept because you host a very popular co. Host with Jordana A modern dating podcast.

[Jared Freed]

The U up podcast. If you want a like a realistic talk about dating. Not like, I mean we do the clips too.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

But a lot of dating talk has been co opted by like the worst human beings alive.

[Katie Nolan]

Most types of talk. I do feel like that's happening to.

[Jared Freed]

I just watched a guy, he's just turned on his own in such a way. It's like cuz the way to pop off with dating stuff as a man on social media is to trash men with no nuance and to like just basically say pander. Panned. Totally pandering. This guy. I was like, does this guy have a phone? It's like 2 million followers. It's him in his car being like. Every time I see an ugly man, I just think of the woman that had to like lower her standards to be with an ugly man. And I was like, dude, you're disgusting.

[Katie Nolan]

Weird.

[Jared Freed]

What like a. Like that's your life. Making up scenarios in your car.

[Katie Nolan]

In your car.

[Jared Freed]

What a loser. I don't know. I. I love loser. I'm bringing back loser.

[Katie Nolan]

Nice. That hurts. It still hurts. Hurts.

[Jared Freed]

What a loser. Right? Like that's not like a swear. That's like you've thought about it.

[Katie Nolan]

It's like dork. Somebody calls you a dork with a hard K. Dork. Like you're a dork.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, love. Dork.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Love. Loser. Love. This is from Keith Robinson. Dan knows him well too. He's the king of it stinks. Stinks.

[Katie Nolan]

Stinks is good.

[Jared Freed]

Stinks is great. You stink. It stinks. They stick. Stink. Love it.

[Katie Nolan]

Perfect. A hard K. They're valuable.

[Jared Freed]

Cuckoo bananas. I've been trying to like make happen.

[Katie Nolan]

And I'm gonna let you do that one. That's gonna be cuckoo bananas. You can do that on your own.

[Jared Freed]

Just say, do me a favor. Just say cuckoo bananas. Watch how good it feels.

[Katie Nolan]

He's he. That guy. He's cuckoo bananas. No.

[Jared Freed]

You didn't like how it rolled off? I didn't, I didn't.

[Katie Nolan]

But that's. Look at. We write to edit different strokes for different folks. Yeah, maybe that's. Maybe that's what you're into as the co host of a modern dating podcast.

[Jared Freed]

That's right.

[Katie Nolan]

You must talk a lot about a concept of red flags, which is when you notice some behavior in a pot.

[Jared Freed]

Kind of started that whole thing.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay, and now what game?

[Jared Freed]

Red flag. Deal breaker. So the whole point of the podcast is to talk about dating in a very thoughtful way that also understands that people makes mistakes Right. So smart. That's what we do.

[Katie Nolan]

As it should be. Also, modern dating is just a nightmare phrase that you need somebody to help you kind of navigate. Cuz from what I understand, it kind of sucks out there right now.

[Jared Freed]

Well, that's an easy way to look like to paint it. I think it's always sucked if you think, you know, I think you would have thought dating sucks now. You probably really thought my marriage of 30 years sucks. You know, like I, you know, I don't know. I think modern dating, the phrase is really to explain. We talk about things that if you talk to your parents about it, they really wouldn't understand.

[Brady]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

So if you said they watch my Instagram story every day, but they never make a plan, I can talk about that for three days.

[Katie Nolan]

Whereas your mom would go like, what does that mean?

[Brady]

What does it matter?

[Jared Freed]

Just go out with them, pick up.

[Katie Nolan]

The phone, talk to him.

[Jared Freed]

Do you know you guys asked for a picture of me playing football? Yeah, I did ask and I texted my mom, hey, this is, this is my whole life. Ready? I go, mom, I need a picture of me playing football. She calls me immediately and I have the missed call. I go, I can't get on the phone. She goes, when do you need it? You always need this things at the last second. I go, is there a picture in the house of me playing football? I gotta get a box out. We need a ladder. She mentioned a ladder and I'm like, if you need a ladder, we're gonna go, no picture, no pic. She goes, I just got surgery. You're gonna make me get a ladder out. I just said, I just said, walk into dad's office. Is there a picture of me playing football?

[Katie Nolan]

God forbid, by the way, God forbid there's a picture of you playing in your father's office. You think he'd wanna hang that on the wall?

[Jared Freed]

She goes, call your brother. I go, you don't think it's weird to say call your brother about a picture of me playing football? I go, most parents have pictures of their children.

[Katie Nolan]

Mine are all in boxes too. I've had this exact same with my mom. She goes, oh, I gotta drag the rhythmic gymnastics box out again. Or you could leave it out. I won a junior Olympic gold medal. You could just leave it out. You could just be proud.

[Jared Freed]

It is an option box now.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure do. Multiple point.

[Jared Freed]

Is everything labeled rg?

[Katie Nolan]

You have you co host a modern dating podcast called Very popular.

[Jared Freed]

We do it on YouTube, we do it on Instagram.

[Katie Nolan]

Amazing. Proud of them. We're so proud of them.

[Jared Freed]

I like making this go longer.

[Katie Nolan]

Also with you mentioning Katie. I'm going to kill. I'm going to.

[Jared Freed]

I'm going to truly choke you out, Katie Nutson.

[Katie Nolan]

Because of the way you said that you are. You love sports, but you're less of a fan. And because you're an expert on dating. Dating, yes. I thought I would shut the.

[Jared Freed]

I just don't like saying an expert. That's a quote that will get me in trouble.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay, you're fair enough.

[Jared Freed]

Because guy calls himself an expert and then I dump some chicks mad at me.

[Katie Nolan]

He calls himself TD freak. I called him an expert.

[Jared Freed]

Thank you.

[Katie Nolan]

And I will correct it. You're not an expert, but you are well versed in discussing dating and the nuances of the modern day world.

[Jared Freed]

I can speak for men in 2025 better than any straight man.

[Katie Nolan]

All I want to do is I'm going to read you behaviors that sports.

[Jared Freed]

Fans exhibit and whether they're a red flag.

[Katie Nolan]

If it's a red flag and you only have, I think five of them in there and I've got like this.

[Jared Freed]

Look like there were 30.

[Katie Nolan]

It's only like five. And I've got. Yes, you're going to pull it and you're going to throw it at your camera, which is going to be that one. Don't like hit it, please.

[Jared Freed]

Giving money to Katie Nolan.

[Katie Nolan]

It's. I ordered them on Amazon. You're just going to pop it out and then like lightly toss it. Please don't throw it.

[Jared Freed]

No, that's not my game.

[Katie Nolan]

But I will. I got a list.

[Jared Freed]

I don't do that.

[Katie Nolan]

Have a list of about 20 things and you only have like five flags. So you can't. They can't all be red flags. Flags. Okay. But you're going to let me know if these are like real red flags for somebody you'd want to date or that somebody else might want to date.

[Jared Freed]

So the, the premise is you meet someone, they do this thing.

[Katie Nolan]

They do this thing.

[Jared Freed]

Is it a red flag?

[Katie Nolan]

Is that a red flag to you? Okay. And these are behaviors that sports fans have been known to do. Let's start with being incredibly superstitious.

[Jared Freed]

Not a red flag.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

Being superstitious for sports, I think that's like a fun.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, I think so too. Thanks for agreeing.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And for not hitting us with a flag. Okay. Pregaming before going into a stadium.

[Jared Freed]

That's not a red flag. Depending on, do they make it home to. Are they able to hang after the game if they're not able to Hang after the game because they pregame. Before the game you're running into. Can this guy rally?

[Katie Nolan]

And then.

[Jared Freed]

Oh, that's a red flag.

[Katie Nolan]

It pre. Okay, no, no. Pregaming is fine.

[Jared Freed]

It's not a red flag.

[Katie Nolan]

Wearing a jersey to church.

[Jared Freed]

Get out of here. Gonna challenge that one. That's a red flag.

[Katie Nolan]

Why is that?

[Jared Freed]

It's just not knowing the environment. Yeah, you got to know. So much of dating is knowing the temperature of the room and wanting to know the temperature of the room.

[Katie Nolan]

Of the room.

[Jared Freed]

So if you're wearing a jersey to church, I'm going to live in the land of the bell curve. I always talk about the bell curve. Most of us are in the fat part of the bell curve. We're all normal people. We're not that special. We're not that great. We're not that bad. Most people, 99% of people know that wearing a jersey to church is doing something to make someone else angry. You're ruining your partner's day. So if you are knowingly doing that, then you're not really a great partner.

[Katie Nolan]

Fair enough. Pittsburgh, you've been put on notice.

[Jared Freed]

Listen, if you and your partner are wearing the jersey and you're both garbage together, then that's different.

[Katie Nolan]

Nevermind, Pittsburgh, we've taken you off notice. They know that they're garbage and they're both.

[Jared Freed]

I just wanted to make sure the Pittsburgh people knew that.

[Katie Nolan]

But I do want to say maybe we could add even a little. What if they wear a Ben Roethlisberger jersey to church?

[Jared Freed]

Because for me, right? That's like. That's like a little bit of an oxymoron.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. So what's he doing here?

[Jared Freed]

Right?

[Katie Nolan]

Bandwagoning a successful team. So let's say the Yankees, however many years ago, they were good when everybody jumped on that bandwagon.

[Jared Freed]

Totally.

[Katie Nolan]

There's a red flag.

[Jared Freed]

Green flag.

[Katie Nolan]

Green flag.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a person who likes fun, who can get on board, swim with the current, understands the temperature of the room. Great partner.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay, fair enough. You've got your reasoning.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Booing players on their own team when they make mistakes or do poorly.

[Jared Freed]

Totally fine with that.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay. Accountability.

[Jared Freed]

Accountability. Also, like boo and cheer go together. Do they never cheer and they only boo? No, that's a red flag. Okay, but if they're right. Like, but if they're just. If they're booing along with cheering, you have to do both. Life is great. Gravity.

[Katie Nolan]

Scheduling major life events around sporting events. Can't have the baby shower that day. Because the Bengals play.

[Jared Freed]

It really depends on how far ahead they're getting. Women love a planner. So if you're, like, really planning, like, a year ahead, you're like, wait, we can't tonight, because if we make the baby now, it kind of lines up with, you know, the NFC championship games, and the Cowboys are doing really well this season, so let's just avoid this entirely, and let's have sex next week. The baby would come during the bye week. Like, that is, like, something that a woman would find hot.

[Katie Nolan]

Right?

[Jared Freed]

Like, the idea that, like, the.

[Katie Nolan]

The proper nouns of it, she's not really caring about. It's mostly about. She heard you say you were scheduling something, and she went, huh?

[Jared Freed]

There is nothing hotter to woman than.

[Katie Nolan]

A man with a plan harassing players online when they make a mistake.

[Jared Freed]

That's a red flag.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, that's an nice, good, obvious one.

[Jared Freed]

Throw that one.

[Katie Nolan]

And why is that?

[Jared Freed]

It's just the nature that you have power in this whole thing. The misunderstanding of where you belong in this whole thing. At the stadium, booing is different to me because you made the trip to the stadium. You came there for a good time. You came there to support the team, and the team let you down. You put money into this. You actually, actually walked and, like, got dressed. The fact that you're doing it from your house and you made no effort in this whole thing, like, booing at a stadium is like, we were here with you. We were here. We put a lot of energy.

[Katie Nolan]

We were all rooting for you.

[Jared Freed]

Right. And you're doing it wrong.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. Do it right. But online.

[Jared Freed]

Online, different. I. I have very little respect for Internet commenters because. Because it sucks. Because it's fossil fuel. We need the commenters. We need the worst thing on earth, the most toxic thing on earth to make the videos go. So the only thing that make people comment is rage or laughing face emoji. I just wish more of the medium people would just do laughing face emojis.

[Katie Nolan]

Flood the comments.

[Jared Freed]

Just do something.

[Katie Nolan]

Putting your own last name as an adult person on the back of a jersey. Red flag or.

[Jared Freed]

No, it's not a red flag. I laugh at them, but it's not a bad person to date.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay?

[Jared Freed]

They have whimsy.

[Katie Nolan]

Whimsy. You know, imagine if I was on the team. Whimsy.

[Jared Freed]

It's a little whimsical, but what if.

[Katie Nolan]

It was team but me, Right?

[Jared Freed]

That's Phil Dunphy. That's a good dad.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

You know, like, you put your own name. What are you, a toddler?

[Katie Nolan]

Like, it's crazy, but it's not a red flag.

[Jared Freed]

But it's not a bad person to date.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. It's not a green flag, but it's not a red flag.

[Jared Freed]

Right. Falling in love is crazy, too.

[Katie Nolan]

Slamming a friend through a folding table that has been set on fire in the parking lot of a football stadium.

[Jared Freed]

It's a red flag.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, no.

[Jared Freed]

I'm sorry. I respect what the Bills fans do. I do think it's fun, good natured. I don't think any of those people going through the tables are ready for a serious relationship.

[Katie Nolan]

Well, they might already be in one.

[Jared Freed]

And those people dating them should reassess. And I just think that's. You're not. You're. You're more. If you're dating, like, first date, you're like, are they taking this seriously like I am? And then you see them fly through a table with the ultimate warrior makeup on. I don't think they're thinking about the next step. I just think it's like.

[Katie Nolan]

The next step is going through the table.

[Jared Freed]

Right. The next step is taking off the warrior.

[Katie Nolan]

Ultimate warrior makeup.

[Isabella]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

Easily finishing nine beers and nine hot dogs in nine innings. That's the 999 challenge.

[Jared Freed]

It's. I like it because it's commitment.

[Katie Nolan]

Commitment.

[Jared Freed]

Different than the table thing. You're going to say, well, you don't think a guy who gets thrown through a table is ready for a relationship, but you do think. Think the guy who has nine hot dogs and nine beers at a game is ready. And I'd say yes, because the person going through the table, they might not have a ticket to the game. They literally went to a parking lot to throw themselves through a table. That was their. That was their first thought. That was.

[Katie Nolan]

Football's kind of like an afterthought to the plan.

[Jared Freed]

This guy at the baseball game has made a plan. He's gone to the game, bought the ticket. Bought the ticket. He sat in his seat. He got through all nine innings, not.

[Katie Nolan]

Making a problem, can afford nine beers and nine hot dogs at a game, which is about a thousand dollars, I feel like.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

So that's. Yeah, good point.

[Jared Freed]

That's kind of a. I. I don't think. And that is, to me, the adult version of through the table you're sitting.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, you're right.

[Jared Freed]

These are good things.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay. How about stealing a home run ball from a child? Red flag or no red flag?

[Jared Freed]

It's not a red flag to do it.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay, interesting.

[Jared Freed]

So I think, like, when you first are, like, in the scrum for the ball. Nothing changes a human more than a T shirt gun.

[Katie Nolan]

It's true.

[Jared Freed]

When a T shirt gun comes out, people turn into T shirt gun people.

[Katie Nolan]

You find out who you are, right? That who everyone around you is.

[Jared Freed]

Thank you. That is who you are. You are your worst self when that T shirt gun comes out. You're pushing grandmas out of the way. You're doing face smushes to little kids.

[Katie Nolan]

Doesn't matter if you're an extra small. That XXL T shirt has to be yours.

[Jared Freed]

I need it. I want it. I gotta have it. Ariana Grande. So I am. I give empathy to the person going for the ball or the T shirt gun. It's when the dust settles. Like a T shirt gun coming out or a home run ball being hit at you. That's like a woman who's getting married and hurt. Like, that's like a woman who. Whose wedding day is approaching. And then the ball lands and the T shirt goes with whoever it goes with. And then I throw. I think that's the wedding ending. And them going, who did I marry?

[Katie Nolan]

Who's my husband?

[Jared Freed]

What did I do?

[Katie Nolan]

What did I do? What happened? Am I okay? Right?

[Jared Freed]

Did I act like a jerk? I'm sorry for what I said before.

[Katie Nolan]

And so you think in the moment after that's where you would go, Did I steal this from a kid?

[Jared Freed]

Here you go. And then you give it back.

[Katie Nolan]

My bad.

[Jared Freed]

So they gotta give it back. If they stick to this and they take the ball and they go, we caught it. That kick kid. And go himself. That's when you got a. That's a red flag.

[Katie Nolan]

That's a red flag. Yeah. Crying after your team loses the Super Bowl.

[Jared Freed]

Totally fine with that.

[Katie Nolan]

Love that. Good.

[Jared Freed]

Totally fine with that. Because the team losing the super bowl, there's so much more. It's family, it's friends. You know, this is something my dad wanted and that we shared. There's so much more part of the fabric. To me it's a green flag. You're dating someone who. Who has the full range of emotions.

[Katie Nolan]

Eating horse poop after your team wins the Super Bowl.

[Jared Freed]

Who did this?

[Katie Nolan]

Philadelphia Eagles fan.

[Jared Freed]

He ate horse poop. Why did I even ask? Of course.

[Katie Nolan]

Why are you not reaching for. I'm like wondering if you're gonna maybe not flat.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, that's a. You don't date that guy.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Definitely don't know if you needed me.

[Katie Nolan]

To say it, but definitely don't date that guy. Oh, I had.

[Jared Freed]

He ate Horeshit.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, we watched him do it did it on camera, too, of course.

[Jared Freed]

Listen, you gotta get the views.

[Katie Nolan]

Lost in the excitement of it.

[Jared Freed]

And then he's gonna go. Every time I see an ugly man, I think of the woman who lowered her standards to date him. This is a real shill.

[Katie Nolan]

Crazy thing to say.

[Jared Freed]

Is that crazy?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

He just invented a sad loser for us to all smash.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay. And then lastly, we get viewer emails and voicemail all the time. Mostly not about advice. We're not stepping on your. But we have. Sometimes they ask for advice, and I figured since you're good at giving advice, not an expert. Please don't scream at me and let me get through the intro. But I just want to read an email that's asking for advice, and maybe you can help. Advise, not annoy. I just have a hard enough time making this podcast as short as they want me to make it, and it's hard to do when you and I could just yap for hours.

[Jared Freed]

I'm having a great time.

[Katie Nolan]

Ryan email. And he asked. Hey, Katie. And the Casualties. That's what we call my producers. Isn't that fun?

[Jared Freed]

The Casualties.

[Katie Nolan]

Isn't that fun?

[Jared Freed]

I love a podcast universe.

[Katie Nolan]

Isn't it great? My girlfriend is going to run her first marathon. Congratulations to her. I plan on making a sign for encouragement, but I don't know where. Along the earnest scale it should be cute. Some ideas that Ryan suggests. Oh, the places you'll groan. I get it.

[Jared Freed]

I get it.

[Katie Nolan]

But I'm grown, so I don't need.

[Jared Freed]

We don't groan. What he needs to be aware of is what the worst human could do to his sign.

[Katie Nolan]

Good point.

[Jared Freed]

And change what you meant into something dirty and awful.

[Katie Nolan]

An instinct that those of us who've been forged in the fire of Internet comment sections have learned to do almost just naturally where we go. What's the worst way this could be taken out of context so we can cover up? And you're right, grown is a tough.

[Jared Freed]

It's a tough word.

[Katie Nolan]

So we'll skip that one.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah, I think take that one out.

[Katie Nolan]

Cross the. That one off. Just. This is a sign. It would say, just here to say I'm proud of you, Lauren. Participation Trophy husband.

[Jared Freed]

No, no.

[Katie Nolan]

You don't like the hashtag?

[Jared Freed]

The hashtag.

[Katie Nolan]

Not a fan of saying hashtag.

[Jared Freed]

Well, the participation husband. Making it about you.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jared Freed]

It's not. It's faux support.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay, Third option. And this is the final one, so if you don't like this, we better have a better option. Right? Finish and I'll adopt you A D dog. Now, that would motivate me.

[Jared Freed]

He's got to get a dog.

[Katie Nolan]

But, yes, she would have to. He would then have to get her a dog. But I feel like. I don't think you write that in as a suggestion if you're not willing to.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

It would be insane. Ryan. We'll just state for the record for you to write that on a sign and then she finishes, and then you don't adopt a dog. So as long as we're on the same page, you would do it, right?

[Jared Freed]

You have to. If you're going to be boyfriend of the year, you gotta do it. Like, because that would make you Instagram post of the year because you show.

[Katie Nolan]

The payoff of the puppy. Everybody would share it anyway because the puppy's cute. You're thinking engagement. Not. Not like literal engagement. Engagement online.

[Jared Freed]

His girlfriend. This is an opportunity to brag about you, about how great and supportive you are for her. It's turning you. You are a Tiffany's point bracelet. You are to be shown. And if you're going to do this, know what the future holds for you, which is an Instagram post that shows you with the sign and her looking beautiful after the race with the tinfoil blanket on after she's done like a burrito, you know, like. And then the next picture is you with the dog and her on the. On the doorstep of whatever on your little stoop starter home you guys have.

[Katie Nolan]

Right? So we hope these days, if you.

[Jared Freed]

Are not already thinking of. I think this is. Do that one with a warning. You got to get the dog.

[Katie Nolan]

You're going to have to. On a regular timeline. On a timeline that's pretty quick turnaround within.

[Jared Freed]

Within two weeks.

[Katie Nolan]

Start having the adoption agency at least pick out. Like, you should have a plan.

[Jared Freed]

This guy's got work to do. You got to be ready to get the dog within two weeks. And you have to already be like, I'm definitely getting married to this girl.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

Like, if those are not, of course we got to change directions.

[Katie Nolan]

Right. And what would you suggest if none of these three options would work? You said something as advice that was to sort of guide you towards what to write on a sign, which was.

[Jared Freed]

What'S the sign going to be?

[Katie Nolan]

You said something about grandma that I thought was good advice for this.

[Jared Freed]

My grandma advice is the same for best man speech and for sign at the marathon for your girlfriend. It's gotta work for grandma and your friends. It can't just work for your friends and not grandma. So remember, Grandma's in The room. Your friend who ran the marathon isn't gonna go to her parents and be like. And Mike came and look at. And then have to explain your grown thing.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

So that's my overarching advice. I'm trying to think of, like, what would be fun. I don't know her specifically.

[Katie Nolan]

And we also don't know where on the route you are, whether this is mile two or if you're on mile 21.

[Jared Freed]

Right. Well, what's a fear she has that everyone in her family knows?

[Katie Nolan]

Spiders. If you were asking about me, it's spiders.

[Jared Freed]

So spiders. Imagine all the whole course is full of spiders. Like, I think you want to something personal. Personal to her and her hopes and fears and dreams.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

That her family also knows about. It's kind of like popularized in a fantasy family. So that your family goes. He supported you and he knows about.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, pretend all the guys, all the runners behind you are platypuses. And you're gonna go like, oh, my God, he knows your weird, weird fear.

[Jared Freed]

The. The key with the sign is to make it about her while also making it about you.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

So you're making it about. The sign is so much about her that you look like a better boyfriend to everyone in her immediate friend group and family.

[Katie Nolan]

And yet it can't be so on the nose that your hashtag participation trophy husband. You can't name yourself. You can't devote marker strokes, sharpie strokes to your name or your.

[Jared Freed]

Well, acknowledging about you to acknowledging. Look at me, right?

[Katie Nolan]

They're already looking at you because you're holding the sign.

[Jared Freed]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

So let the sign do the talking and be about her, which will then reflect positively on you. Where all the places people can find you. The U UP podcast. That's one.

[Jared Freed]

The U up podcast. The J Train podcast. Guest. I'm Jared Freed. Jared Freed. And then I'm on tour.

[Katie Nolan]

Where are your dates? This comes out on Thursday.

[Jared Freed]

So Friday night I'm in D.C. i'm at the Warner Theater in D.C. i'm very theater ready. It's called the Table for One tour. I'm ready. I got a full. Good. I got a good hour cooking.

[Katie Nolan]

Good.

[Jared Freed]

It can get better. We're going to work on.

[Katie Nolan]

They don't have to know that.

[Jared Freed]

Well, I mean, I promoted. To be honest.

[Katie Nolan]

Say that it's good.

[Jared Freed]

No, it's good. But I don't want to, like, you know, undersell over deliver, you know, so we're D.C. and then I'm coming to Milwaukee, Minneapolis and Chicago. And then I'm coming to Fort Lauderdale, Miami, Orlando, Tampa, San Diego, and then way more dates. New York. I'm doing a New York show. So I got all the jaredfree.com jared free.com jared free.com the e before the I. E before the I. Or just go to, like, my Instagram. It's all there. The first post is like, the whole tour. But come bring your family. Family. It's about my parents. I talk about my parents. I talk about going to Europe alone, whether I want to be in a relationship or not. Because you get asked that when you're a man at 40.

[Katie Nolan]

Well, especially with a relationship podcast, I would imagine.

[Jared Freed]

Well, I just don't get the question. This is why. It's just a good set, not a great one yet. I'm still fumbling around. I'm like, what a weird question.

[Katie Nolan]

Are you interested in dating?

[Jared Freed]

Of course. I think everyone. I'm not that guy. Do I strike you as the guy who just wants to fuck forever?

[Katie Nolan]

No. What? No, I've never truly, by my reaction, never had that thought even once.

[Chris]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

I. I'd like a normal life.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[Jared Freed]

You know, like, I think it's absolutely normal to not want a relationship.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

What's the hardest part about dating a comedian?

[Katie Nolan]

Oh. Oh. I think at first, I've gotten used to this now, but at first it was accepting that when a fight or something happens between us, I'm gonna have to share it with the world because he's gonna tell the story of it, and it's gonna be, you know, and.

[Jared Freed]

It'S only one person it could be about.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

It's not chick I dated 10 years ago.

[Katie Nolan]

Exactly. At this point, they go, when he talks about a woman, you know, it's me.

[Jared Freed]

Do you think that's harder? Cause you're public too?

[Katie Nolan]

Maybe it would be. But honestly, I've accepted this of about it because it's actually now one of my favorite things, which is that when something bad happens to us, he turns it into a joke and makes me laugh at it, which is, I think, how you burn clean energy in life, which is take anything that's bad and somehow make it good in an, like, enjoyable, entertaining experience.

[Jared Freed]

The fossil fuel thing I did about the Internet commenters, and you took it in a new direction. I like it.

[Katie Nolan]

Hey, thanks.

[Jared Freed]

No, I. I'm with you. That people think, oh, this will be a great material. You're gonna do jokes about me. It's like, no, I have to be so enraged about something.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Jared Freed]

Like, I. The first 10 minutes of my act is about my dad offering me Oic. It really hurt my feelings.

[Katie Nolan]

Like his own supply.

[Jared Freed]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

Literally offered to me. You want some of this at dinner?

[Katie Nolan]

You want to hit this right at dinner?

[Jared Freed]

At dinner, middle of the fries. I talk about this. It's the first 10 minutes of my act. I don't mind talking about it because it's my life, you know? Like, I, I. And I try to. And I'm like, they're still doing. Like, it still annoys me, and I can't believe that they.

[Katie Nolan]

And.

[Jared Freed]

Cause I leave the house thinking I look good. I don't leave the house.

[Katie Nolan]

And you do. Jared.

[Jared Freed]

No.

[Katie Nolan]

No. Come on, Jared. Free. Thank you so much for being here for six hours of this podcast.

[Jared Freed]

Pleas a pleasure.

[Katie Nolan]

We will edit it down to only the parts where we are both thin and hilarious.

[Jared Freed]

If we are not thin and hilarious, I will literally go crazy. No, this was fantastic.

[Katie Nolan]

Always good to see you.

[Jared Freed]

I'm a huge fan of you and thank you so much.

[Katie Nolan]

Huge fan of you as well. Thank you for being here.

[Jared Freed]

Even if you just started following me.

[Katie Nolan]

Today on Instagram, it's not true. I've been. I have been. I just got nervous. I would never mute you.

[Jared Freed]

Okay, good. No, this is great.

[Katie Nolan]

Cool. Bye.

[Jared Freed]

Bye.

[Katie Nolan]

Amazon has everything for everyone on your list. Like your teenage son who won't give up the peach fuzz currently posing as.

[Isabella]

A mustache on his upper lip.

[Katie Nolan]

Get him an electric razor.

[Isabella]

Amazon has early holiday deals on gifts everyone wants, like the latest kitchen gadgets.

[Katie Nolan]

And toys and some they don't even know they need, like that razor.

[Isabella]

Grab him a mirror too, so he.

[Katie Nolan]

Can see how pretty he is without.

[Isabella]

That dirt on his lip.

[Jared Freed]

Hey, everyone, it's me, Andy Cohen. Buckle up because I have a podcast called Daddy Diaries where I take my listeners on an as it happened, recount of life as a daddy to two kids, dozens of housewives, and the occasional original fella. Listen to the Daddy Diaries to hear about my high highs and low lows of parenting, housewives drama and so much more. Daddy Diaries. Available wherever you listen to podcasts. Netcredit is here to say yes to.

[Katie Nolan]

A personal loan or line of credit when other lenders say no. Apply in minutes and get a decision.

[Jared Freed]

As soon as the same day. Loans offered by NetCredit or lending partner.

[Katie Nolan]

Banks and serviced by NetCredit.

[Jared Freed]

Application subject to review and approval.

[Katie Nolan]

Learn more at netcredit.com partner NetCredit Credit to the people. Clorox Toilet Wand.

[Jared Freed]

It's all in one. Clorox Toilet Wand.

[Katie Nolan]

It's all in one. Hey, what does all in One mean the caddy, the wand, the preloaded pad.

[Jared Freed]

There's a cleaner in there inside the pad.

[Katie Nolan]

So Clorox toilet wand is all I need to clean a toilet. You don't need a bottle of solution.

[Isabella]

To get into this toilet revolution.

[Jared Freed]

Clorox clean feels good.

[Katie Nolan]

Use as directed. Okay? Amazing. Big thank you to Jared Freed for coming by. He's got such a busy schedule here, and it was nice of him to swing by. Always good to talk to him. And crazy that we may have been at the same high school football game. So funny both having what to us felt like the biggest moment of our lives. Because surely I was like, I'm dancing for Framingham High, the fhe dance team. Okay, it's Thursday, and so this is the time of the week when we take a look at what happened in football through the lens of Isabella's fantasy football team. Isabella is a new fan. She is in charge of our fantasy football team this year. She drafted them and she is setting the lineups every week and so far has been kicking ass. She has yet to lose. I do not know what happened there this week. Let's find out. All of us together. Isabella, did you win your fantasy matchup this week?

[Isabella]

What do you think?

[Katie Nolan]

I, I, I won even with that.

[Jared Freed]

Puka by 64 points.

[Katie Nolan]

Wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry. She won by 64 points?

[Brady]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

What did I mean?

[Brady]

150 to 86.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, my God.

[Brady]

What?

[Katie Nolan]

Did somebody not start?

[Brady]

Because she said, oh, I'll, you know, Puka's out there. I'll just, I'll throw Devonte Smith. I don't have to do anything. And Devonte Smith had a career high 183 yards.

[Isabella]

Yeah, he did really, really well.

[Katie Nolan]

This is insane. Has anyone on your team underperformed? Is there anybody you're mad at?

[Isabella]

No, I don't think so. Everyone seems to be coming through for me, so I will say though this.

[Brady]

But you will never feel anger at him.

[Chris]

I was gonna say he had a. Definitely had a down week.

[Katie Nolan]

Wait, who?

[Chris]

Last weekend.

[Jared Freed]

Caleb.

[Katie Nolan]

She's not ever gonna, she doesn't.

[Isabella]

She's not even had a down week. And that's fine.

[Katie Nolan]

No, and that's why you have. That's why it's a team sport.

[Isabella]

And that's why he's not gonna be in my starting lineup this week. And that's okay.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, that's breaking news. That's breaking news.

[Isabella]

Yeah. No, I'm putting in Daniel Jones. Are you kidding me? Look at that man's numbers.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm obsessed with this. This is the point of the podcast.

[Chris]

He is playing like a top five qb, then rejoins.

[Isabella]

Yeah. And then he's going. I'm going up to. Against someone with Patrick Mahomes as their qb. So, like, I can't have Caleb Williams in there. I'm sorry, sweetie.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm so sorry.

[Isabella]

You did not.

[Chris]

He plays against the second tier teams.

[Katie Nolan]

A football has been made. I do have two major in a lab.

[Isabella]

You did. I have two. Okay. One player. And then also my defense is on the bye week, so I have to get a new defense.

[Katie Nolan]

And your player that's on a bye week is Kyron Williams. Yes. And you've currently got him in your RB2 slot, correct, as your second running back?

[Isabella]

I do.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[Isabella]

And I have a couple people on my bench that are. Are not playing. Actually three people. So I have to. I may have to like, get another person.

[Katie Nolan]

Does sound that way.

[Brady]

Well, you have a running back. J.K. dobbins is sitting on your bench.

[Katie Nolan]

So put him in. You can. He's fine. Right?

[Chris]

He had his.

[Brady]

The bar is lower because there's a lot of teams on by.

[Katie Nolan]

Right.

[Chris]

But he. He had an off game over the weekend, but before that, he's been putting up some pretty decent numbers in that offense. And he's playing against the Cowboys that have been given up a whole bunch of points.

[Katie Nolan]

And you're also grateful that you benched him during his off week. That's the best way it could be. He had a bad week.

[Chris]

He didn't feel he had a bad week because Isabella, bench.

[Katie Nolan]

Exactly. And so now you'll start him and he'll have a career game.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm also just obsessed with the idea that the only Daniel Jones she knows is this Daniel Jones, where she goes like, yeah, I'll start Daniel Jones. Why wouldn't I do that? There's nothing in her mind that goes like, does he suck?

[Brady]

There was a Giants version of him that they just cut.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. They couldn't have been much worse.

[Isabella]

Oh, like he was on the Giants and he was bad.

[Brady]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. They just gave him up for nothing.

[Katie Nolan]

No, we don't know him. We only know this one.

[Isabella]

Sorry to.

[Brady]

What you do need is a defense, though, because you have Seattle's defense. Seattle's onboard. I have a suggestion for you. It is a winning suggestion.

[Isabella]

Okay.

[Brady]

The Cincinnati Bengals are available.

[Isabella]

They are.

[Brady]

They are playing against the New York jets this week. And the New York Jets. Their entire quarterback situation is cheeks.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, she can pick them up right now.

[Brady]

Yeah. Yep.

[Katie Nolan]

Isabella. I would do that Right now? Yeah. Oh, my God, I'm obsessed.

[Isabella]

Wait, do I have to. Oh, I have to drop. Drop Seattle.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay, well, you have to drop anybody. You have to drop something. You don't. It doesn't have to be Seattle if you don't want to. If you really like them, you could drop.

[Isabella]

Oh, you know what? I'm gonna drop, actually. I'll drop this Whittington guy. Oh, wait. But he seems kind of good. Hold on, wait.

[Brady]

He just has cool hair and a distinguished name.

[Isabella]

Okay.

[Jared Freed]

So.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Isabella]

Okay.

[Chris]

I wouldn't call him good compared to everyone you have.

[Katie Nolan]

Yes, he can. Now that we've said that, as you know, now that you've been success, player added, amazing.

[Jared Freed]

Oh, look at that in real time.

[Katie Nolan]

Isabella, I'm so. I genuinely. We're joking. But I'm so proud of you. You've done such a good job with this team. You mentioned the other day on. When I saw you in the. On the radio show, you were like, I been checking the lineups. Like you've been like tuned in and I'm just. This is the cutest. It's infuriating in the sense that like, how have you not. How are you winning by that many points? Points. It's your experience. Feels easy in a way that I'm not sure I ever felt, but I'm. I love it. I think it's really cute. I think it's really cute on you and I hope it feels cute to you as well.

[Isabella]

It does.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay, good.

[Isabella]

It does.

[Katie Nolan]

Football's super cute. Get into it.

[Isabella]

Yeah.

[Brady]

The fun game this weekend. Sunday night, Aaron Rodgers against the packers for the first time.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh yeah.

[Brady]

Sunday nighter.

[Katie Nolan]

Sunday night. Cuz it's the packers and the. And the. Where's he Steelers on Monday night.

[Brady]

I like Sunday night.

[Katie Nolan]

Sunday night, the Collinsworth game in.

[Brady]

In Pittsburgh. So it's not. Not in Green Bay. It doesn't have to get the. The Packer fans, but. Yeah. Rogers against the old team for the first time.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, that should be interesting. He's been doing a lot less talking this year. He's like not, you know, causing controversy like he used to. Don't you feel? Or am I just. Have I tuned to the him out. Have I told my algorithm to cut the. With the.

[Brady]

I feel like we would know if he was doing the McAfee podcast.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh yeah, true. Maybe the money ran out. Must have because gave it to all those college kids.

[Brady]

Something I'd never wanted to tune into. But like somehow it's just force fed into my ears and I haven't heard about it.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, true. All right, let's wrap this up because it's the hour six of the podcast. So thank you everybody, for listening. Don't forget, if you want to reach out to us, Casuals with Katie Nolan. Gmail 646-80-0043 is the voicemail on Igne Tik Tok. We are at Casuals, the podcast. If you'd rather talk to me live, you can do that on the radio. Mad Dog sports radio on SiriusXM, channel 82 every Monday through Friday from noon to 1 Eastern. If you call 888 Mad Dog 6, I answer the phone and we talk about sports. You can do that there. That's it, right, guys? Get merch. Buy merch. Siriusxmstore.com Casuals and I think that's that's it. And we will see you on Tuesday after. How many games into the World Series will we be by then?

[Jared Freed]

Three or four?

[Brady]

Saturday, Monday, three games in.

[Katie Nolan]

So we'll talk to you then. We love you. We mean it. Bye.

[Jared Freed]

Hey, everyone, it's me, Andy Cohen. Buckle up, because I have a podcast called Daddy Diaries where I take my listeners on an as it happened, recount of life as a daddy to two kids, dozens of housewives, and the occasional fella. Listen to the Daddy Diaries to hear about my high highs and low lows of parenting, housew and so much more Daddy Diaries available wherever you listen to podcasts.

[Katie Nolan]

Clorox Toilet Wand.

[Jared Freed]

It's all in one. Clorox Toilet Wand.

[Katie Nolan]

It's all in one. Hey, what does all in one mean? The Caddy, the wand, the preloaded pad. There's a cleaner in there inside the pad. So Clorox Toilet Wand is all I need to clean a toilet. You don't need a bottle of solution.

[Isabella]

To get into the solar revolution.

[Jared Freed]

Clorox Clean feels good.

[Katie Nolan]

Use as directed.