Madness, Fat Bats, and Lebron/Snow White Crossovers | with Gianmarco Soresi

Summary

Casuals with Katie Nolan: Episode Summary Episode Title: Madness, Fat Bats, and Lebron/Snow White Crossovers | with Gianmarco Soresi
Release Date: April 1, 2025

---

1. Introduction

In this episode of Casuals with Katie Nolan, host Katie Nolan welcomes comedian John Marco Cerese to discuss a variety of sports topics, making the world of sports accessible and entertaining for casual fans. The conversation touches on recent achievements in figure skating, the excitement of March Madness, controversies in Major League Baseball, and humorous takes on first pitches thrown by celebrities.

2. Women’s Figure Skating: Alyssa Liu’s Remarkable Comeback

Katie Nolan opens the discussion with a spotlight on Alyssa Liu, a standout US figure skater who made headlines by winning the World Championships in Boston. At 19, Alyssa became the first US woman to win the title in nearly two decades, following her earlier retirement at 16 to focus on personal growth. Her return to skating and subsequent victory exemplify passion and personal agency in sports.

Katie Nolan [05:30]: "She was doing it on her own terms... It was like this was a girl who knew she was great at something, decided she was done with it, came back to it kind of more naturally."

3. March Madness: Final Four Analysis

The conversation shifts to the NCAA March Madness tournament, highlighting the men's Final Four teams—Auburn, Florida, Duke, and Houston—all number one seeds. This rare occurrence, only the second time all top seeds reached the Final Four, sparked discussions about the predictability of brackets.

John Marco Cerese [14:37]: "If anybody still has a bracket that's alive and well, that's a very boring person, because that means you just picked the guy who was gonna win the whole way through."

In contrast, the women’s Final Four features South Carolina, UCLA, Texas, and Yukon, with Yukon’s Paige Beckers making waves by scoring 40 points in a game, setting a UConn tournament record.

4. Major League Baseball: Controversies and Mishaps

John Marco Cerese delves into recent MLB events, including the introduction of the controversial "torpedo bats" by the New York Yankees, which have been linked to record-breaking home runs. The discussion criticizes the fairness and impact of altered equipment on the integrity of the game.

John Marco Cerese [27:35]: "It's like cheating. Your tools are better."

Additionally, the episode highlights MLB’s technical issues on Opening Day, where fans experienced streaming outages despite paying for the service. The response from MLB, offering minor discounts, was met with skepticism and frustration from the hosts.

Katie Nolan [22:39]: "How dare they present that as a gift... They are just making slightly less profit."

The segment also humorously critiques Fanatics' merchandise errors, where team logos were incorrectly printed, leading to awkward and unintended messages.

5. First Pitch Fiascos: Celebrities Take the Mound

A recurring segment explores the often entertaining yet cringe-worthy attempts by celebrities and comedians to throw first pitches at baseball games. Highlights include:

• Bert Kreischer’s Attempt

  Katie Nolan [32:53]: "He looks like that guy that, like, he still did it in high school."

• Sarah Silverman’s Performance

  Katie Nolan [33:26]: "She threw that like she did. Played sports."

• Nick Thune’s Uniform Blunder

  Katie Nolan [34:52]: "Oh, listen, a nice pitch. If he was wearing sweatpants... I'd be like, whoa, that regular guy can throw a pitch."

• Sam J.’s Struggles at Fenway Park

  Katie Nolan [35:47]: "Oh, boy. That is horrendous."

These anecdotes provide a humorous take on the challenges celebrities face when stepping into the athletic spotlight.

6. You Don't See That Every Day: Unusual Sports Moments

In this unique segment, the hosts share extraordinary and lesser-known sports stories:

• Chicago Bulls’ Lightning-Quick Scoring

  Katie Nolan [60:49]: "This is a problem. LeBron... I'm gonna say, motherfucker."

• Nashville Predators’ Reddit Mishap A Reddit user mistakenly posts in the Nashville Predators' subreddit, believing it to be a community for predators, leading to humorous confusion and inappropriate interactions.

• The Lost Boys: MLB Players from the 2020 Season Kyle Hart, one of the "Lost Boys" who played during the fan-less 2020 season, returns to the MLB after excelling in the Korean Baseball League, finally playing in front of fans again.

  Katie Nolan [67:28]: "I wonder if they look at the stats for those games, like how it was affected by not having like people cheering or booing."

7. LeBron James vs. Stephen A. Smith: A Heated Rivalry

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to the escalating feud between LeBron James and sports commentator Stephen A. Smith. The conflict ignited when Stephen A. criticized LeBron for featuring his son, Bronny James, on the Lakers team, accusing him of nepotism.

John Marco Cerese [44:03]: "LeBron James confronts Stephen A. Smith while he was courtside... 'Keep my son out of this shit, bro.'"

LeBron’s response on the Pat McAfee Show and subsequent social media interactions further fueled the tension, with both parties exchanging accusations and insults. The hosts discuss the implications of this public confrontation, emphasizing the challenges of maintaining professionalism and personal boundaries in the world of sports entertainment.

8. Upcoming Sports Highlights

Before concluding, the producers share key upcoming sports events:

• Men’s and Women’s NCAA Final Four Matches

  • Women’s match featuring Paige Beckers’ remarkable performance.

• NHL Clash: Capitals vs. Islanders

  • Highlighting a player on the verge of breaking a scoring record.

• MLB Showdown: Braves vs. Dodgers

  • Featuring Dustin May’s return from injury against an undefeated Dodgers team.

9. Conclusion

Katie Nolan and John Marco Cerese wrap up the episode with light-hearted banter about their growing interest in sports drama and anticipation for the upcoming games. They encourage listeners to engage with the show via email and social media, promising more engaging sports content in future episodes.

Katie Nolan [72:03]: "I love the drama."
John Marco Cerese [71:56]: "If you ever see anything in sports you want to talk about, you can come here. We'll always have you."

---

Notable Quotes:

• John Marco Cerese [14:37]: "If anybody still has a bracket that's alive and well, that's a very boring person, because that means you just picked the guy who was gonna win the whole way through."

• Katie Nolan [22:39]: "How dare they present that as a gift... They are just making slightly less profit."

• John Marco Cerese [44:03]: "LeBron James confronts Stephen A. Smith while he was courtside... 'Keep my son out of this shit, bro.'"

• Katie Nolan [72:03]: "I love the drama."

---

This episode offers a comprehensive and entertaining overview of current sports events, blending insightful analysis with comedic commentary to engage both avid and casual sports fans.

Transcript

[Katie Nolan]

Are you still quoting 30 year old movies? Have you said cool beans in the past 90 days? Do you think Discover isn't widely accepted? If this sounds like you, you're stuck in the past. Discover is accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide and every time you make a purchase with your card, you automatically earn cash back. Welcome to the now it pays to Discover. Learn [e-mail] credit card based on the February 2024 Nelson Report Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile.

[John Marco Cerese]

I don't know if you knew this.

[Katie Nolan]

But anyone can get the same Premium.

[John Marco Cerese]

Wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities.

[Katie Nolan]

So do like I did and have.

[John Marco Cerese]

One of your assistant's assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to [e-mail] Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month Required intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full [e-mail] hey Isabella, did you see Tiger woods posted on X or whatever that he's working with doctors and his Achilles is all fixed and he's gonna play in the Masters? Are we happy? We're happy about that, right?

[Katie Nolan]

Because it's healed.

[John Marco Cerese]

Two hours later he quote tweeted it and base and said like April fools. Oh, I feel like that's bad karma for him. I hate this holiday. Hello and welcome to Casuals, the sports podcast that is for people who want to know most of it but don't one I have to know all of it all the time. I'm Katie Nolan. I'm your host. My guest today, very funny comedian John Marco Cerese. He will join us in just a little bit. If you'd like to email us casualswithkatie nolanmail.com our voicemail 646-810-0043 on IG and TikTok, we are at Casuals, the podcast. As always, we gotta start this podcast off with a little bit of a yap, a quick one today. I've said that before and I also feel like I'm damning myself anytime I say that because it's like, well now it's gonna go on forever. But today we're talking about women figure skating in the yap and don't tune out. Maybe it's not your sport, maybe it's not a sport you pay a lot of attention to. Maybe like me, you're really only paying attention to Figure skating around the Olympics. But this past weekend in Boston was the World Championship of Figure Skating. And the winner of that was a US Woman named Alyssa Lou. That is the first female, the first US woman to win the World Championships in almost two decades. Last time it happened was Kimmy Meisner. I don't remember that name. We are old. Why this is so interesting. Alyssa Liu. She was the youngest ever US champion at the age of 13. In 2019, she finished sixth in the 2022 Beijing Olympics. She got bronze at the Worlds in 2022. And then at the age of 16, she, she retired. She basically said, I've achieved all of my goals and more. I've done everything I wanted to do in skating. And so I'm gonna focus on my friends and my family. I'm gonna focus on school, I'm gonna study. I'm just gonna walk away from skating. I think I've. I've achieved all that I set out to achieve, and now I'm gonna go. People were shocked because she was so good. She had such a promising career, but also very supportive that she went out on her own terms. In 2023, she went on a ski trip with her friends. And while she was skiing, she said that she experienced this, a rush that was unlike anything she had felt other than competing at figure skating. And she said that it was almost like an exciting reminder of what skating used to feel like. And she started to miss that. So she went back on her own terms and she was like, maybe I'll just like, skate again. And she did a bunch, got back with some old coaches and then came out and won Worlds this year. What's amazing about it and why I loved it so much is because not just, you know, that she came back on her own, you could watching her perform again. I don't know if you're a figure skating person. I never figure skated. My best friend when I was little, Jill Beto, she figure skated. She was very good, but it was not for me. I played hockey for a living. And then when we couldn't afford equipment for two kids and Kevin's didn't fit me anymore, I stopped and I danced and, you know, rhythmic gymnastics, but I never figure skated. So when I watch figure skating and even gymnastics at the Olympics, an artistic sport, it's always the scoring is very confusing and I don't really know what I'm looking for, but I'm watching the performance as if it's a performance, right? This performance from a, ironically enough, a 19 year old who had retired and came back from retirement, which sounds crazy, but watching her perform was, like, so engrossing. I was so glued to the screen. She. There's something about sometimes in figure skating where you're like, wow, this is very technical. And I can tell that it's impressive technically, but emotionally, I. I'm not really connected to what's happening. And maybe it's because. Maybe it's because Alyssa skated. Her short program was to a song by Levy, an artist who I was calling Laufey for a very long time, but I'm here to. To everybody know the correct pronunciation is Levy. It's a beautiful song. It's called the Promise. Maybe it's because that's, like, a modern song that I know her. Her long program was also to Donna Summer, another fantastic performance. But it just felt like this was a girl who knew she was great at something, decided she was done with it, came back to it kind of more naturally, and now is doing it for her. She was doing it on her own terms. The way that she was expressive during her performance, the way that she connected with the. It truly felt like, you know, they always say, like, the job you're most likely to get. The best job interview you're going to have is one for a job that you don't really need or you don't really want, because you just kind of go in there as yourself, and you're like, I'll try, but I'm probably not going to get it. And then you end up whatever. I feel like this is that. I think a lot of times with young female athletes, the sport itself is responsible for so much. And I'm not saying I know this about her. I don't know anything about her experience in figure skating, But a lot of times in gymnastics and other sports that have young female athletes, there's just this pressure sometimes abuse sometimes, like an indoctrination into this sport. And there really is no. You wonder when the young girl gets to develop into the person that she wants to be. And what. It's just. This just stuck out to me because it felt like Alyssa got to walk away and then come back when she wanted to. It felt like she got to spend time with her friends and family and stay, study and grow into a person who then, as a new person, was like, and I do still want to figure skate. And then she came back and she crushed it. She absolutely crushed it. It was beautiful. I really think you should go look it up. There's her short program and her long program, both amazing. But so shout out to Alyssa Lou for coming back and doing it on your own terms at the ripe old age of 19. It's exciting to see. Hopefully we'll see her at the Olympics, which is what, next year in Italy. That would be exciting. And I just, you know, you don't usually hear about these athletes until you're at the time of year when it's the Olympics. So this is us letting you know in advance you'll have somebody to root for. Alyssa Liu, congratulations on being the first woman to win a US Woman to win the world championships in almost two decades. We love you. What a beautiful performance. And le vey just for everyone. Lei vey not laufey, but Levy. Okay, so that's your. Yeah, that was relatively quick, right? About figure skating. Very quick. Housekeeping. I want to thank Thad, our fan, Thad who sent us the blue hose hat. I guess we mentioned the blue hose for a second during our March Madness bracket and. And he sent a whole hat. While we're talking hats, I have secured I believe a, a, a tatas hat. I believe I was offered a $40 deal from Ian Carmel, friend of the podcast. And he And I said $40. Absolutely. Sold. And so now we're just figuring out how to get it to me. But I believe if all things go well, we will have a taytas hat. Yeah. Here in the studio with us. Okay. That being said, my guest today, John Marco Cerezi. Hilarious. You've probably seen him somewhere on the Internet. His clips are everywhere. He's an incredibly funny comedian. He is a studied drama, University of Miami. We get into all the rest of it. It's a. I kept him here for way too long. But here is. Welcome to the podcast. John Marco Cerese. For 140 years MultiCare has been in Washington prioritizing long term solutions, partnering with local communities and expanding access to care. Together we're building a healthier future. Learn [e-mail] Are you still quoting 30 year old movies?

[Katie Nolan]

Have you said cool beans in the past 90 days? Do you think disc isn't widely accepted? If this sounds like you, you're stuck in the past. Discover is accepted at 99 of places that take credit cards nationwide. And every time you make a purchase with your card, you automatically earn cash back. Welcome to the now it pays to Discover. Learn [e-mail] credit card based on the February 2024 Nelson Report. If you've been having your McDonald's Sausage McMuffin with an Iced coffee from somewhere else, now is a Great time to.

[John Marco Cerese]

Rec in the Pacific Northwest. It's never too cold for an iced coffee in the morning. Grab yourself a medium caramel, French vanilla or classic iced coffee for just $2.29. Beverage may cause craving for McMuffin or hash browns. Prices and participation may vary. Cannot be combined with any other offer or combo meal. If you share a fridge with someone, Instacart can make grocery shopping so much easier. With family carts. You'll share a cart and each add what you need. Between the two of you, odds are you'll remember everything. So more milkless cereal. Minimize the stress of the weekly shop with family carts. Download the Instacart app and get delivery in as fast as 30 minutes. Enjoy. Zero dollar delivery fees on your first three orders. Service fees apply for three orders in 14 days. Excludes restaurants. John Marco Cerese, thank you for being here.

[Katie Nolan]

Thank you for having me.

[John Marco Cerese]

I know you're a very casual sports fan. Very casual, if at all.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. My dad. My dad always acts like. Like I'm watching. He's like, did you see the game? And I'm like, I haven't for 20 years. Why do you keep asking? But no, I. I did stuff, and I. I turn it on and I dream about going to Madison Square Garden, front row. I like basketball.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Because I can keep track of the characters.

[John Marco Cerese]

Of course.

[Katie Nolan]

It becomes more theater to me.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. Easier when you can see their faces than, say, hockey, where they've got a helmet on.

[Katie Nolan]

I don't understand.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, that's okay. And I argue that you don't really have to understand to like it a little bit.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure. You know, as long as I can establish characters.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

That's all I need to enjoy the game.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. You went to the U. You went to University of Miami.

[Katie Nolan]

University of Miami. I went to one football game freshman year. We lost 36 to zero, and that was the last game I went to.

[John Marco Cerese]

I mean, what a brutal game to see.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. I don't think. I don't think I was going during, like, a real good time.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

So. Yeah. Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

You tried to give the culture the chance to get its, like, hooks in you. Freshman year, you go to a game, but it just didn't work. They didn't do it.

[Katie Nolan]

It just didn't do it. We were lost by the first quarter.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. That's tough. Did you tailgate?

[Katie Nolan]

No, I saw them and I said, that looks nice. Any salad options here at the tailgate?

[John Marco Cerese]

Do we have a white or a red I could partake in?

[Katie Nolan]

I want to do it. I want To. Yeah, in theory, I do.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

Except for baseball. Baseball is the one that I like. I sound like the typical. Like when you swinging a stick at a mall. Baseball is tough for me. I've been to several baseball games. I can't. I will ne. I will never go to a baseball game. I don't care if it's the last game in the World Series. I will never go to a baseball game ever again.

[John Marco Cerese]

You're breaking my heart right now.

[Katie Nolan]

I will never do it.

[John Marco Cerese]

Why? Just boring.

[Katie Nolan]

It's just so slow. I'm going crazy.

[John Marco Cerese]

That's life. That's beaut. You can do. You can run your lines while you wait. There's, like, stuff. There's plenty of space.

[Katie Nolan]

I. It's. It's that I went to a baseball game without. With no friend. Like, I went with, like, the owner of a comedy club. So don't bring over here.

[John Marco Cerese]

No.

[Katie Nolan]

And so it was torturous.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, that would be torturous. That was like. I went to see kind of similar. Kind of different. I went to see Spring Awakening in college with my dance history professor and sat. We sat next to. And I was like, this is really hard to watch with a. With a professor because of dance history.

[Katie Nolan]

Is that what you just said?

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

What do you mean? Like, that was the whole class?

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. I was a dance minor, and it was a dance history class.

[Katie Nolan]

Wow, that sounds amazing.

[John Marco Cerese]

Isn't that something? Yeah, but to sit next to your teacher while someone's, like, masturbating on stage was a tough, tough hang.

[Katie Nolan]

I saw it with my mom.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. See, you know. Yeah. So she got it.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

She understood. All right. What we do here is we go through sports news. I know you might be like, that's terrifying, because I don't care or know any of it, but we are a podcast for casual fans. So if I'm doing my job right, I give you enough information for you to be able to entertain and understand.

[Katie Nolan]

I see the video. It's. It's LeBron talking to the. The guy and go, whoa, Something's going on.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And LeBron and his son, and he's playing, and they're saying, the sun's not as good, I guess.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, we're getting to that actual story.

[Katie Nolan]

I see these pieces and I go, cool.

[John Marco Cerese]

We're going to hopefully fill in some of the blanks for you and then get. But I think an outsider's perspective on sports is usually funnier anyway.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure.

[John Marco Cerese]

And then you being so funny. I have no worries about this.

[Katie Nolan]

Great.

[John Marco Cerese]

This could all go sideways. But I think it's gonna be fine. All right, we'll start with March Madness. You're aware of March Madness?

[Katie Nolan]

I am.

[John Marco Cerese]

The college basketball tournament. In the men's tournament, we are down from 64 teams. We now just have four left. The final Four. It's Auburn, Florida, Duke, and Houston, who all entered the tournament as number one seeds. So it's the people that the committee decided were the best made it to the end. Surprisingly, this is only the second time in history that all the number one seeds made it to the Final Four. Usually there's upsets, sure. Not many of those this year, but still. Like, if your Final Four on your bracket is all number one seeds, like, if anybody still has a bracket that's alive and well, that's a very boring person, because that means you just picked the guy who was gonna win the whole way through.

[Katie Nolan]

I did these in, like, in high school, and I would have. I would have been killing it right now.

[John Marco Cerese]

When's the last time you filled out a bracket?

[Katie Nolan]

It had to have been high school, and it was just. Just guessing.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. I mean, just guessing. I would say 80% of people are just guessing. I don't think most people, because college basketball, we don't pay attention to it, really, until this point.

[Katie Nolan]

Are you doing it? Are you putting money in?

[John Marco Cerese]

No, I think I put, like, 20 bucks on a bracket. It busted right away, which is what you say. It's not inappropriate. It's what you say when your bracket's done. So I picked, like, St. John's to.

[Katie Nolan]

Win, and then I understood. I didn't think it was other.

[John Marco Cerese]

As I said, busted to your face.

[Katie Nolan]

As the team's win?

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, it's very graphic. Does any aspect of March Madness appeal to you? The fact that it's, like, once a year, the fact that it's, like, an event.

[Katie Nolan]

I love a bracket. Who doesn't love a bracket? You see the things move and you get excited. Yeah, Yeah, I. I get. I. I like. I like the excitement. I like the excitement of competing with your peers and. And guessing and feeling like, oh, I won or I lost.

[John Marco Cerese]

What about, like, an upset? As an outsider sports fan, do you love an upset, or do you like when the best teams.

[Katie Nolan]

No, I'm always looking for the upset. If I'm going to, like, if I'm watching a Super bowl with no context, and it's like, well, this is the team who should win. I'm like, I hope they lose.

[John Marco Cerese]

Good.

[Katie Nolan]

I hope it's embarrassing. I hope it's. It's crazy. So I love an upset.

[John Marco Cerese]

Okay, good. Because I never know if that's like a sports thing or if outside of sports people are like, no, I want to see the best compete against the best.

[Katie Nolan]

I think there's very few times, like, I feel like I was young enough for the Michael Jordan run. Like, I was a kid at that age. And that's one of the few times where you're like, just keep winning. You just want him to keep winning.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right? Cause you're like, I feel like I'm witnessing something historic.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But otherwise, if it's a big team again, individual characters succeed, big franchises, let them go.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. The women's tournament this year has actually been much more interesting and exciting. And I'm not just saying that because I'm an ally.

[Katie Nolan]

I would never think that.

[John Marco Cerese]

But they are also down to the final Four at South Carolina, UCLA, Texas and Yukon. That's three number one seeds and a number two seed. But the two seed is Yukon, and this is their 24th appearance in the Final Four. So the women's game has a little bit less parody. These are all kind of schools we thought were going to make it to the end. But some exciting moments from this year's tournament. Maryland did not beat South Carolina, Don Staley's team that won last year in the sweet 16, but they almost did. They made it out by the skin of their teeth. Yukon's Paige Beckers put up 40 points. Does that mean anything to you? That's a lot of points.

[Katie Nolan]

40 points is a lot of points. Yeah, I know that when I played basketball middle school, I was not doing close.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, not 40 shots. Yeah. Well, that's good. Zero point shot volume. It's important Percentage probably pretty low.

[Katie Nolan]

I always had good shot volume for sure. Second I got the ball. I tossed in that thing away.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. Turns out even non shooters shoot 40 points when they won over Oklahoma. It's not only a new career high for her, but a UConn tournament record as well. Which is crazy because they've been in the tournament and dominant through the tournament for decades. And then the TCU Horned Frogs, they were eliminated by Texas last night, but Haley Van Lith sank a three in their Sweet 16 game against Notre Dame. That gave us probably the best celebration video of the tournament so far. We're going to show it to you. This is her father celebrating, and he. And the person that he celebrates with at the end is her boyfriend. Okay, so this is in the crowd after she hits a three.

[Katie Nolan]

I love it. I love a good celebration. I love A good dance. It's. It's that. That's where I. That's where I connect to sports. I go. Oh, you get these, like, acute senses of community and just celebration.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Between a father, father in law. Are they married yet or.

[John Marco Cerese]

No, I think they're just boyfriend, girlfriend.

[Katie Nolan]

Is there a name for that? There needs to be a name for that.

[John Marco Cerese]

There should be like, a. Somebody should come up with a name. Yeah, I thought something would come to me more.

[Katie Nolan]

There's a religion. Dad. I almost want daddy.

[John Marco Cerese]

Father, father and a half father.

[Katie Nolan]

You never had half father, half father. Could be stepdad might take offense to that.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, maybe. But they're a full dad. They're the dad that stepped up father in theory. Okay. Theoretical daddy.

[Katie Nolan]

Theoretical daddy, I think works.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, I love. Yeah, I love a dad boyfriend relationship.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

I like the confidence of a dad to, like, by the way, I don't know if you saw he was wearing a shirt adorned with his daughter's, like, name, and it was like he was wearing a shirt that was, like, for his daughter, and then he, like, ran down the stairs and smacked him in the. I love a dad that's confident enough to be like, come over here and celebrate this with me.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure. I think what's. So I, I saw. I won't name any names here, but there was someone who won an award once, and you saw their partner, like, in the audience as they got the award, and they didn't react at all. But that's the difference in, like, sports and, like, awards. It's like sports. That happened right then.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Awards. It's like a year ago you did a thing, and now we're doing the thing. So that's what I love.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

So I do. I do enjoy those moments.

[John Marco Cerese]

You. So you didn't like when the spouse did nothing?

[Katie Nolan]

No, I, I, it was not good.

[John Marco Cerese]

No.

[Katie Nolan]

And I, I just clocked in my head because I think my girlfriend will be winning some things in. In her life.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And. And I just said, like, listen, buddy, those cameras could be on any second, so that you. You lock in. You lock in and you dance.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

You clap.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

Because this guy did not look excited. Oh, it did not look good. It looked like, oh, divorce tonight.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, man. And this was how long ago?

[Katie Nolan]

It was like a year ago. They're still together? As far as I know.

[John Marco Cerese]

Well, good for them. Brady, what's up? You keep popping back in. I want to add a wrinkle to.

[Katie Nolan]

The Haley Van List story.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, what do we got?

[Katie Nolan]

So not only. Not only is the Aggressive chest mom.

[John Marco Cerese]

Coming down from her dad to her boyfriend. Her boyfriend is Jalen Suggs. Oh, yes. Who is the point guard for the Orlando Magic.

[Katie Nolan]

He is about 6 foot 5.

[John Marco Cerese]

He is.

[Katie Nolan]

I should have clocked something. He was a Giant. Yeah, Giant man. And has been wearing her jersey from.

[John Marco Cerese]

TCU around every game and they are absolutely adorable. He has been front and center in cheering squad and they. I want to hang with the Van Litz now. Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Have there been a lot. I feel like there haven't been like a lot of superstar athlete couples.

[John Marco Cerese]

There's a couple. Do you know who Sue Bird is? She's like one of the most accomplished female WNBA players.

[Katie Nolan]

I think so.

[John Marco Cerese]

Her and Megan Rapinoe, who is the soccer star who has the short pink hair. Probably last you saw her, if you saw her at all. They're. They date.

[Katie Nolan]

I don't like it between sports. Different sports.

[John Marco Cerese]

You don't like that?

[Katie Nolan]

I don't approve.

[John Marco Cerese]

Not okay with that.

[Katie Nolan]

No, no, no.

[John Marco Cerese]

Why is that?

[Katie Nolan]

I you. Different rules, different world, different system.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

You should keep to your sport. I'm sorry to be a little behind the times.

[John Marco Cerese]

Not to be old fashioned. Stick to your own. I believe is the quote, the pull quote from John Marco here. Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

He likes you to date within your own. That's pretty wild. Pretty wild thing to say.

[Katie Nolan]

Yep.

[John Marco Cerese]

All right, so that was basketball.

[Katie Nolan]

That I love it.

[John Marco Cerese]

Pretty painless.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

The other big thing everybody's talking about right now, it was opening day of the Major League Baseball. I know you're not a fan of the Major League Baseball season on Thursday. So only like 158 games left to go till the season's over. MLB TV, that's the streaming service for Major League baseball. It's like 150 bucks to sign up for.

[Katie Nolan]

They pay you that, I assume they.

[John Marco Cerese]

Suffered major outages on the game's most visible day. Fans across the country logged on to the $150 streaming service they signed up for on very famous Baseball Day and were unable to watch their team's game as a make good. MLB is offering those affected by the outage a promo code for $10 off any purchase of $25 or [e-mail].

[Katie Nolan]

How dare they present that as a gift. I don't even know this industry and I know that's a scam if I ever heard one. That's. Oh, yeah. Oh, the thing failed. Well, now I want their merch for sure. Oh, $10 off. They were already up charging them $25. They're just making slightly less profit. That's. That's. You guys gotta abandon baseball.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, I think everybody should stop watching baseball because of that.

[Katie Nolan]

Stop watching it.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's pretty screwed up. Also, having to make a purchase of 25 or more is like, can I just get $10 off even if I buy something? $10? God forbid. I gave you 150 and you gave me. Literally. I couldn't watch baseball. You gave me literally nothing.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm sure everything they're selling is 50 bucks, though. I'm sure it's like sticker for $100.

[John Marco Cerese]

I mean, a lot of it is.

[Katie Nolan]

Cal Ripken walked by this sticker once.

[John Marco Cerese]

And since you might not know this, a lot of the merch is made by a company called Fanatics, which is, I guess, not known for quality merchandise. They recently put out an ad for opening day on social media that features two fans in Twins jerseys at a ballpark. And it says opening day 2025. It's got the little Twins logo on the bottom. So you assume this is being served to Twins fans, Minnesota Twins fans. But if you look a little bit closer on this Fanatics ad, the hats that they're wearing are Cleveland guardian hats. And if you look even closer, the field that there's. The ballpark they're in is. Is famously Camden Yards, which is where the Orioles play. And so this perfectly sums up the quality of Fanatics merch to most sports fans.

[Katie Nolan]

I mean, if it was $10 off, I think I'd get something. I mean, as long as I had the coupon.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

I mean, listen, these Facebook, these promos are slapped together by someone or not.

[John Marco Cerese]

Someone, or just AI.

[Katie Nolan]

Probably AI got something wrong.

[John Marco Cerese]

I feel like you're the only person that that ad wouldn't have triggered a. You could be a. I would have seen that ad.

[Katie Nolan]

Looks like a. At the baseball stadium to me. I love that Twins logo with the big C. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

All right, well, that's it. We'll get you some Fanatics merch. They famously, a couple weeks ago, put out a bunch of hats that clearly nobody. Oh, maybe that wasn't Fanatics. It was on MLB Shop, though, where nobody thought through. They took the logo. So, like, a lot of teams have, like, let's say the Texas Rangers, they have a big T. Is their logo.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm sorry, how dumb do you think I am? You over calibrated how bad I know sports. You explain to me how the logo of the team works.

[John Marco Cerese]

Is the team. Well, I'm just saying they took the taste.

[Katie Nolan]

They have like an animal. But it's not the animals playing. That's like. Well, there's a mascot. Okay.

[John Marco Cerese]

They take the T and they put it over the name of the city. So instead of it being like some of them.

[Katie Nolan]

That's insane.

[John Marco Cerese]

Some of them have a picture, so that works better in this format. But a lot of them just have a letter. And what it does is it forms a new word and is a Spanish word for boobs.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, is it?

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

I thought I was reading an English word for boobs.

[John Marco Cerese]

This is angels. But what does it look like to you?

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, my God. Anals.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's anals.

[Katie Nolan]

Anals. I'd get that shirt.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's not bad. The Ashos.

[Katie Nolan]

How did they do this?

[John Marco Cerese]

It's. It had to be a. There's no way. But they really did make the hats. They took a bunch of them down like Taytas was. I think they took anals down. They took.

[Katie Nolan]

I mean, that looks hideous.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's ugly.

[Katie Nolan]

I. Okay. I have this idea. I don't think it's sustainable business wise. I want to make sports jerseys, but it's for whatever musical you did in high school. So it'd be like Seymour on the back.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And like the logo would be like the plants or whatever.

[John Marco Cerese]

Sure.

[Katie Nolan]

So it's like.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's like Little Shop of Horrors.

[Katie Nolan]

Little Shop of Hors. Because I don't get. I don't. I can't wear a jersey without feel like I'm putting. I'm faking it.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right. Like I'm really composer.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. Yeah. But if I had one that was like Seymour or you know, Phantom and there's like a mask on the front, like, very cool. So it's an idea I have.

[John Marco Cerese]

Okay. I think you should get to work on this. I know theater jerseys. I mean, theater fans are very passionate. This is a good ready audience.

[Katie Nolan]

And sometimes you like a jersey. Jerseys can be great to wear.

[John Marco Cerese]

Especially like one of the button up baseball jerseys. They could wear open over like a shirt and it just has like Phantom or whatever now.

[Katie Nolan]

Do you know the baseball musical Damn Yankees? Damn Yankees?

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

That'd be a perfect one.

[John Marco Cerese]

That's the one. That's where you start and then you.

[Katie Nolan]

Expand and a musical, it's when they sing sometimes instead of speaking.

[John Marco Cerese]

Okay.

[Katie Nolan]

It's too complicated.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. But I'll look into it.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure.

[John Marco Cerese]

Another thing everybody was talking about this week that I'm sure has crossed your radar. The Yankees New York baseball team, they scored a team record nine home runs in Saturday's victory over Milwaukee. That's A lot. You can. That seems like a lot to you?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Nine in one game of the.

[Katie Nolan]

That's a record. That's a record.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[John Marco Cerese]

Four of them were hit by players using these new bats called torpedo bats that shift wood. As basically as I can explain it, it takes wood from the end of the bat and it moves it a little closer to the label to basically try to meaty up the part of the bat that's going to hit the ball. They call it barreling the ball when you hit a ball really well, I call it cheating.

[Katie Nolan]

What is this?

[John Marco Cerese]

So it's apparently on the up and up. Apparently it's legal to have changed the bat in this way, but everybody was sort of like, what the hell is this?

[Katie Nolan]

But how's it fair for stats if Babe Ruth heard. Babe Ruth had to make his own bat out of a tree he found that morning. And they got scientists. We move this slightly there. It's like. It's great. But you. You can't then be like, well, I beat this other person. Yeah, your tools are better.

[John Marco Cerese]

This story, not necessarily new, but I thought I'd like to hear your opinion on it. The Athletics, a team that used to be in Oakland. They were the Oakland A's, or the Oakland Athletics, you may have heard of.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay, I've heard of the.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, they are no longer. They are just the Athletics now because they will be playing this season and possibly the next two or three in a minor league ballpark in Sacramento after their team ownership let the lease on the Oakland Coliseum expire in 2024, which is where they used to play. And the new stadium that they're trying to get built in Las Vegas, they're trying to move. The team won't be ready until at least 2028.

[Katie Nolan]

So why don't they keep the Oakland for now?

[John Marco Cerese]

Because they let the lease expire, so they got kicked out.

[Katie Nolan]

But they can still call themselves Oakland, right?

[John Marco Cerese]

They could.

[Katie Nolan]

What's. What's a. What's a home game for them? They're in just people who are physically fit. I mean, I guess that could be something like, hey, I'm athletic. I support them. The Athletics versus the Fatsos. I don't know if there's another team that's missing. Missing their stadium, but that makes no sense. Just call it Oakland. That's best part of the whole fun. I mean, when I grew up in D.C. area and so we were a big fan of. What are they now?

[John Marco Cerese]

The Nationals?

[Katie Nolan]

No, the football team.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, the. The. The Commanders. The Washington Commanders.

[Katie Nolan]

I had to Throw away a lot of T shirts.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, well, they were racist T shirts.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

You probably shouldn't have had them in the first place.

[Katie Nolan]

They were on fire when I threw them out.

[John Marco Cerese]

Good. He burned them for your YouTube channel. Probably. That content does very well. But isn't it crazy that these owners are basically kidnapping a team? Without a new. Like we've seen across sports, owners will sometimes take a team and move it to a new city. We've never. I don't. Well, we've seen it maybe once in hockey. It's just crazy to me that they're allowed to take it away for like three with nowhere else for it to go. Even with, like apartments. I like to. When my lease is up, I've got a new place lined up up, so I go straight to a new place. They're just going to like a in between minor league stadium.

[Katie Nolan]

If anything, the city of Sacramento should be offended.

[John Marco Cerese]

Like, what do you want?

[Katie Nolan]

Are you going to use our stadium? But you can't be the Sacramento Athletics.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, and you want us to go to the games and buy tickets, but then you're going to leave soon. Why would I get attached to you?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's crazy to me.

[Katie Nolan]

I'd be furious.

[John Marco Cerese]

Baseball media member Ben Ross posted a photo of the press conference set up at the team's temporary home. And it looks like a walk in standalone shed. I figured we'd look at it, but since it's taking too long. Cut this out. Oh, no, here it is. This is the media setup. Oh, too funny for press conferences. Look at that. It's very thin and long and we don't have to watch the video, but.

[Katie Nolan]

I've performed in Sacramento and this is honestly one of the biggest banquet halls I've ever seen in that city. So really, this is. They're living large for Sacramento standards. We can't judge it by our city.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's so true. Okay, and then more baseball, but almost done, I promise. Stand up comedian and friend of the show. Do you know Stavros?

[Katie Nolan]

Of course.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. He threw out a first pitch at an Orioles game.

[Katie Nolan]

My biggest fear in my entire life is that I will be asked to do that one day.

[John Marco Cerese]

Really?

[Katie Nolan]

And I would. It will. It'll be one of those. That's so bad. It's not a funny bad. It's like a. Oh, my. My God.

[John Marco Cerese]

Really? You think it'd be like staging intervention bad.

[Katie Nolan]

It's kind of like, you know when they see like a. A rich person and they have to like chop a cucumber and they do it like with two hands and you go, you're not human.

[John Marco Cerese]

Was it a Jenner that we saw chopping vegetables? And when everybody was like, yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And that's what's gonna be like for baseball. It's gonna be like, oh, he's never held anything in his hands other than a micro.

[John Marco Cerese]

Why did he hold it like that?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Why did his body move that way? I'm now looking forward to it.

[Katie Nolan]

I should be able to go out and do the first time sometimes something else.

[John Marco Cerese]

Can't I do the opening ball change? Yeah, I get it, I get it.

[Katie Nolan]

Look at that dance minor coming in.

[John Marco Cerese]

You know, I can't help it. It's all there. A lot of stand up comedians I've found, has, have thrown out first pitches. So we're gonna take a look at a couple first pitches of stand up comedians.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, great.

[John Marco Cerese]

And I figured you could either critique them or say whatever you want about them. The first one we have here, should.

[Katie Nolan]

I critique their comedy?

[John Marco Cerese]

Absolutely. The first one we have here is Bert Kreischer.

[Katie Nolan]

Look good. I mean, this is a guy who looks like he's like throwing a ball around.

[John Marco Cerese]

He does, yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

He does sports. He's been around sports. He's seen. I would hope that Bert Kreischer could do it.

[John Marco Cerese]

I just look at him and I go, I don't think my first thought is an athlete.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, but he looks like that guy that, like, he still. He did it in high school and, you know, it used to be he could drink anything he wanted. And then later in life he was like, oh. Oh, wow.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, it caught up to me.

[Katie Nolan]

It caught up.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And he made a career out of it.

[John Marco Cerese]

He sure did. Next we have Sarah Silverman. This is at a Toronto Blue Jays.

[Katie Nolan]

Can't imagine this is. This would be strong. I say it as a fan.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, really? Not bad.

[Katie Nolan]

Not bad at all. I, I misspoke.

[John Marco Cerese]

Spikes the glove, walks off with attitude, and then sort of catches herself and goes like, okay, I'll go back.

[Katie Nolan]

She's, she's. She threw that like she did. Played sports.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

But I was, I didn't get to do it, but I was invited. She does like a basketball. You know how Gary Shandling did, like basketball games, I think, like her Adam Sandler. And there was like, there was a thing that I could have potentially been at like one of the comedian basketball games, and I couldn't do it. And I was kind of relieved because I think it would be that thing of like, oh, it's not fun to Play with you. You're so bad.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right. That's like a celebrity softball game. And I'm like, I played in high school, but I'm like, I'm. I think I would suck now and take it too seriously. So it would be a bad combo for fun.

[Katie Nolan]

And then there's Power dynamics.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

If Adam Sandler's going for a shot, am I gonna fucking boom? No. I'm gonna, like, oh, I'd love to be in uncut gems, too. Like, there's no way that's a fair game.

[John Marco Cerese]

I like the way you boom.

[Katie Nolan]

Boom. That's what I did. Boom is what I'd say.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, that's good. Who's next? We have. Oh, this is Nick Thune. This is Nick Thune. A million years ago, full uniform.

[Katie Nolan]

Wow.

[John Marco Cerese]

Full uniform with the socks, the stirrups, everything. The. It's fully.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, listen, a nice pitch. A nice pitch. If. But in full uniform, you go, that baseball player has passed his prime.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

The uniform is setting too high an expectation for me.

[John Marco Cerese]

That's a very good point.

[Katie Nolan]

When I'm going out there, I'm on my phone while I do it. So you go, well, yeah, it wasn't that good, but he was clearly. He was emailing. He was tweeting something.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right. So this did say, like, I care.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Screams, I care. And then he throws a great pitch. I'd be a lot more impressed by it. It's a great point by you. If he was wearing, like, sweatpants and, you know. Yeah. I'd be like, whoa, that regular guy can throw a pants.

[Katie Nolan]

A jumper.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, a jumper. Sure.

[Katie Nolan]

Overalls. Comedy. Comedy gear.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. Like, dress like a clown. Feet. Rolled out with a. With a. All right, now we have Sam J. This is at Fenway park, the Red Sox ballpark.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, boy. Oh, boy. That is horrendous. That is tough.

[John Marco Cerese]

That was a really bad one.

[Katie Nolan]

They never. They never go, hey, try it again.

[John Marco Cerese]

No, it's only just one first pitch. One pitch.

[Katie Nolan]

That's crazy.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, I know.

[Katie Nolan]

When politicians do this stuff, and I'm like, are you out of your mind?

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

You will lose because of this.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right? Well, it used to be now at this point, you can do anything.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure, sure. You trump throw it backwards. Everyone say, wow, a home run. Pitcher got a home run. That's how good he did it.

[John Marco Cerese]

He threw it all the way into the outfield, just like you're supposed to now. From now on, Tiffany Haddish.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[John Marco Cerese]

For the Mets. Okay, let's talk through what happened here.

[Katie Nolan]

This one makes me mad. Yeah, this one makes me mad. For something to be funny, you gotta try to do it. You have to sincerely try to do it. To me, this is. I'm gonna be a silly goose. I'm gonna be like a bowling startup. I mean, and then I'm not even gonna. In a way, it's not like acknowledging that you're bad at it. It's like, oh, look at me, I'm a bad throw. As opposed to being like, no, show the. That you cannot throw a ball.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

So that one's the more problematic.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, the wind up was a little like, what are we doing? We don't.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, If I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna. I'm gonna try.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

If I'm gonna fall, it's gonna be on my face.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes. Ronny Chang. This is for the. Oh, the Mets. It's for the Mets. Ronnie Chang.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay. Was that a real fall?

[John Marco Cerese]

So he's hurt himself.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, my God, he's hurt himself.

[John Marco Cerese]

It was announced before he went out there that he's playing with a torn labrum. We don't know if that is a joke or if he's just hurt or if he really is. Has a torn labrum. But wait, they made him do the.

[Katie Nolan]

First pitch with an injury.

[John Marco Cerese]

I guess the doc.

[Katie Nolan]

Did the doctor like, shoot him up with steroids right before, like.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, one of those. What are those called?

[Katie Nolan]

The.

[John Marco Cerese]

The shots that you get to make your pain go away, but they don't actually help you.

[Katie Nolan]

That's. That's. So if that's real, that's so funny.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. And a nice. A decent pitch.

[Katie Nolan]

And he did the leg. And again, it was a sincere leg. It wasn't like, look at me playing baseball. It was like, and I'm doing it. And that made it. So I'm fast. I want to look that up now and go, is that real? When next time I see him, I want to say, was that real?

[John Marco Cerese]

We just made a baseball fan out of you. Did you see that?

[Katie Nolan]

Uh huh. Just the first pitch part. And then I go, all right, we can go home.

[John Marco Cerese]

And that's it. And that's. Good game, everybody. Good game, Good game. All right. So you don't think you'll ever do a first pitch.

[Katie Nolan]

I filled with anxiety watching it because I was like, well, how do I do this? And I think it's more like, I'm gonna do it sincere. For me, the choice is more like, what am I wearing?

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, it's important.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. And I think it's gonna be. It's gonna be Funny. Yeah, it's gonna be funny. I don't know how.

[John Marco Cerese]

Kim Mulkey suit. Maybe one of those sequined.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure. But I'm thinking short shorts for sure.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

Something short.

[John Marco Cerese]

Show off the stems. Why not?

[Katie Nolan]

And then I'm gonna go for it. And I don't know where that ball's gonna go.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. Nobody does.

[Katie Nolan]

But I'll do it with my heart. I'll do it with my heart.

[John Marco Cerese]

Are you gonna do it from the mound or you're gonna do it right in front? Cause they'll allow you to do it from the flat grass. But I think the real ones go to the mound.

[Katie Nolan]

I think on the mound, it looks from the outside eye. Not knowing that rule, I'm like, that's cheating.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

So I'm gonna do it from the mound.

[John Marco Cerese]

I love that. I love that about. You don't want to do it, but if you're gonna do it, you do it right.

[Katie Nolan]

I'd like it to be small scale. I'd like it to be minor league, high school, middle school game.

[John Marco Cerese]

I did a minor league game. It's still scary. It's still really scary.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, it's.

[John Marco Cerese]

You could still fail at it really miserably in front of a lot of people.

[Katie Nolan]

Why did that start? There's gotta be a history to that as, like, a thing.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. I don't know. But they. It's. I love it because you get to see people. I mean, there's been some historic really bad first pitches.

[Katie Nolan]

Who has the worst?

[John Marco Cerese]

Like, 50 cents was really, really bad. I think Carly Rae Jepsen maybe had a really bad one. These are just off the top of my head. Just something to Google when you get home. Because, you know, our videos will take an hour to pull up and show you, but I think you'd really enjoy the content.

[Katie Nolan]

I'll check it out.

[John Marco Cerese]

Okay. This was something you brought up earlier. Oh, wait, what's this? We got 50 Cent. Oh, show us.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, let me see. Oh, embarrassing.

[John Marco Cerese]

I mean, almost hit, like, the camera guy.

[Katie Nolan]

Embarrassing.

[John Marco Cerese]

Really brutal for, like, such a tough guy.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Such a muscular tough guy to throw the ball like that.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, but baseball's not like the tough guy. Oh, a tough guy. You probably play some baseball, I bet. Baseball, in my mind, it's still Babe Ruth. It's still that look where I'm like, you're an athlete.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, fair enough. Fair enough. That's why steroids got to come back in a big way. We got a star got popped yesterday. Jerks and profar. We won't we don't have to get. We weeded out the more boring sports news for you.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure. I love steroids, though.

[John Marco Cerese]

You do.

[Katie Nolan]

I just love that because in musical theater at college, sometimes if someone would lose their voice during a show, there'd be this thing of, like, are they gonna do steroids? Yeah, because there'd be steroids for your voice to get through. But you talk like, you cannot go down that path. Like, I don't know. I don't know why, but there was always this thing of like, don't ever do steroids. I never would have dreamed of it. And now you get older and you. Sometimes you have requirements, and you're like, I would take heroin if it could help me get through this show.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, that's true.

[Katie Nolan]

So steroids affecting every industry.

[John Marco Cerese]

Really? People didn't let you do them for music. It was, like, looked down, easy to get.

[Katie Nolan]

But like. Yeah. People always talked about, like, you do. They say, you don't want to do it because then your voice feels fine and you overextend yourself, and then you really lose your voice. It's a good point. But life sometimes.

[John Marco Cerese]

Load me up.

[Katie Nolan]

Load me up. I don't think they have to inject it in your veins, like.

[John Marco Cerese]

No, they do. They do it like this right here.

[Katie Nolan]

They tie off this, and the doctor goes like this. And you have to do it outside, behind the hospital.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes. And it's so strange, and it seems unhygienic, but it is legal. That's legally how you have to do it. This story you brought up a little bit earlier about LeBron.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Tell me about this Stephen A. Smith. Okay. Do you know who Steven A. Smith is?

[Katie Nolan]

Very much.

[John Marco Cerese]

Because you're online.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm very online. So I've seen him. You know, they show him someone from Pokemon or Dragon Ball Z and goes like, who's winning in a fight? And he kind of analyzes it.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, he's a hot take artist.

[Katie Nolan]

We'd say, yeah, he's a hot take artist. And then, like, get a little too close to politics right now, where, like, you know, he'll say something for a moment. He'd be like, everyone should have healthcare. And you're. And everyone goes, stephen A. Smith for president.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And then the next day, he says something not so good, and he's like, I'm hanging with Candace Owens today. But he's. As an entertainer, I admire and appreciate. Did he used to play sports? Sports?

[John Marco Cerese]

I don't think so.

[Katie Nolan]

Really? He was always just a commentator.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, he's like. He's Very skilled and talented at arguing a point in an entertaining, albeit long winded way.

[Katie Nolan]

Does. Are his sports insights ever particularly interesting or unique?

[John Marco Cerese]

Unique in the sense that, again, he's very good at being entertaining to watch while he gives them. He's very animated. He's got passion behind whatever he's saying. I wouldn't necessarily say when I want, like a high level analysis of something that I would go to Stephen A. Smith, but if I just want to know what's going on vaguely in sports while also being entertained, and I make sure to take most of it at just like, face value and not think too much about. He's, you know, very good at that. And he's been doing so at a high level. One of the, like, top paid tv, sports, TV guys for a long time. But he has this beef currently with LeBron that has bubbled over a little bit. This is gonna be our, our play by play on January 28th. Happy birthday to me. Stephen A. Smith, on his morning ESPN show, pleaded with LeBron James to stop allowing his son Bronny to be exposed in the NBA. He said, I'm pleading with LeBron James as a father, stop this. We all know Bronny James is in the NBA because of his dad. You're exposing your son like this. So Bronny James is LeBron's son and.

[Katie Nolan]

He'S currently on the Lakers with his father.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

Which is weird.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes. For a number of reasons. Right. Because you're like, how are you gonna be a pro basketball player with your dad on the team?

[Katie Nolan]

It's humiliating.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

If I was playing a sport and my dad ever got more points than me at that sport, I never play that sport again. But is he. Because I thought one of the things that I admire about sports that entertainment lacks is there's a lack of, by my mind, Nepo babies because the meritocracy of the game of barrels forward. Is this true that Bronnie is like.

[John Marco Cerese]

So Bronnie was in college. He was pretty decent. He had a medical issue that had him not play, I think most of his time in college. And he was. He had like a heart problem that was very scary. He came back from. But then he didn't really prove to most people's standards. He should have probably stayed in high college and kept, like, developing as a player. But LeBron is probably leaving the league soon. And so he saw a window of opportunity to get his son into the team while he's still on the team. They were the first father son to play at the same Time. Time on the court.

[Katie Nolan]

And it's 100% like, LeBron made this happen.

[John Marco Cerese]

Pretty much.

[Katie Nolan]

I think just knowing these facts. Yeah, LeBron should be ridiculed mercilessly because you cannot allow this to be a precedent. Of course, he happens to be on his dad's team. That's weird. And if he's not proven it, you are putting him in a bad position. I have to agree with Stephen A. Smith on this.

[John Marco Cerese]

Okay, so March 6th, LeBron James confronts Stephen A. Smith while he was [e-mail] arena. And you can hear LeBron saying, keep my son out of this shit, bro.

[Katie Nolan]

Keep your son out of this shit, bro. That's what I would have said if I was Stephen A. Smith. Now, that Stephen A. Smith would say that and then go to the game courtside. That's the one game I'd say, I don't need the good seats for this one. Keep me far away. Keep me on the other side of the court. There's no way I would have shown up. Yeah, I mean, he's. He's. Those are fighting words. As a father, you say as a father to another man, you're looking for a fight.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's true. It's fair. On March 7, someone could say it.

[Katie Nolan]

To me, and I don't have a kid.

[John Marco Cerese]

Marco.

[Katie Nolan]

I wouldn't have worn that. To the first pitch, I'd say, don't. I better not see you at the next baseball game.

[John Marco Cerese]

So the next day, after that confrontation, on first pitch, Stephen A. Smith said, that was LeBron James coming up to me, unexpectedly, I might add, to confront me about making sure I mind what I say about his son. I can't repeat the words because they ain't suited for FCC airwaves, but that's what he was doing. Now, I thought long and hard about this over the last few hours because I had no intention of talking about this at all. And the reason why is because it was a one on one. I wouldn't say conversation, but it was a one on one confrontation. That wasn't a basketball player confronting me. That was a parent. Parent. That was a father. He goes on to say that the reason he ends up talking about it is because people, other people were talking about it. There's video of it. It was circulating. It's now news. He felt like he had to, to comment on it. March 11, Stephen A. Smith went on Gilbert Arenas. He's a. He's not still playing. Right. He's too old. Former player. He has a podcast, Gill's arena podcast. And said LeBron's decision to confront him was, quote, weak and, quote, bullshit.

[Katie Nolan]

I disagree with this, too. I disagree with this, too. You are coming to his place of work. I understand that. Like, this is a public event. That is his place of work. You are talking shit about him. You're obviously looking for a confrontation. You're looking for all this stuff. I don't disagree with the opinion that you're stating about his son, but he has every right in his place of work to get whatever he needs to get off his chest so he can go play his game.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Like, it's just edging a little too close to like you are. You're obviously making the game just about yourself. And I think LeBron is in the right. And if guy's playing, I'm not gonna, like, try to get into. He can say whatever he wants. He shouldn't have been at the game. You can't say that and then go to the game. That's rude. That's, like, when my mom says, like, I don't think he should have gone to college musical theater and then sits in the front row for the show.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, dear. She.

[Katie Nolan]

Now I feel like I gotta prove it to you. The only reason I was the musical, because my dad was the lead, he brought me in there, you know, that's very funny.

[John Marco Cerese]

My mom wanted me to major in dance, and I was like, lady, no, not happening.

[Katie Nolan]

My sister would have loved to change places with you.

[John Marco Cerese]

Really?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

I just felt like, I'm gonna graduate, and then I'm like, what am I gonna do with it? I'm not gonna be a professional dancer. I wasn't good enough for that.

[Katie Nolan]

God, I'm already seeing the mom you might be someday, and that poor kid who could never get to dance. What are you gonna do with this?

[John Marco Cerese]

What am I gonna do with it? Okay, so that was March 11th. He said it was bullshit on that podcast. March 12th, Stephen A. Smith discussed the situation on Fox News with host Sean Hannity, who I'm sure had a neutral opinion.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

On the basketball players.

[Katie Nolan]

I thought. I love how he said I thought long and hard for the last couple hours. It's the longest I've ever thought long and hard about anything in my entire life. I decided, you want what? I should do the thing that benefits my career. I realized at the end of the.

[John Marco Cerese]

Day, show on the road.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Let everybody know my opinions on.

[Katie Nolan]

What did Sean Hannity say about.

[John Marco Cerese]

Probably nothing interesting.

[Katie Nolan]

They want to enjoy. They want to enjoy, obviously. And this is the problem. And this is where I find it gross. Where it's like LeBron. You know, he's expressed some political views. Right. I mean, generally. Generally things that a conservative would be excited to take him down, famously.

[John Marco Cerese]

Shut up and Dribble was about LeBron. When they told him, I believe that was Laura Ingram, who was like, you need to just shut up and dribble.

[Katie Nolan]

Fuck. You don't watch the sport. You have to confront the people. It's the same. Honestly. It's the same fucking thing with Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, where I go like. I go like, well, you put him in the movie. You put human beings in the movie to profit off them. This is the risk you take with human beings. You don't want to do it. Make a cartoon, as you should have.

[John Marco Cerese]

But. I mean, ironically. Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

But like, the thing with sports, I'm like. I'm like, fuck. As an outsider.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

I cannot believe that these players, who. They need them to play every time that, you know, if I was these players, unfortunately, I think they're getting so much money, why would they. I would go, okay, I'm not going to play today. Halfway through, I go, you know what? If you don't want to hear me talk. If you don't want to hear me talk, I don't want to dribble.

[John Marco Cerese]

Ow. Is that my knee hurting?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, I. You don't want to hear me talk. I think my knee hurts. Hurts. That'd be me.

[Katie Nolan]

I feel like these. These athletes, they have. They have so much power that it's hard to figure out how to wield, but it's like, at the end of the day, they have to give it their best.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Or there's no game.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

So I love it when athletes get political because I think. I think that's why people get so mad about it, because they go, well, I'm not gonna not watch the game.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

No matter what they say.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

I think they need to go further.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

I think LeBron should be advocating for anarchy at this point. Point.

[John Marco Cerese]

Don't wear a jersey. Wear a shirt that shares all of your political beliefs on it.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. Until you give me universal healthcare, I'm passing the ball around equally to every single person on this court.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. So March 26th, LeBron goes on the Pat McAfee Show. Do you have you had to interact at all?

[Katie Nolan]

I definitely have heard the name Pat McAfee.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. He doesn't often wear sleeves.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay.

[John Marco Cerese]

And he's on ESPN all day.

[Katie Nolan]

Great.

[John Marco Cerese]

So LeBron went on the Pat McAfee Show. It was a big deal. LeBron doesn't usually do interviews, views. And he said of Stephen A. Smith, he said, and this is espn, is Stephen A. Smith's network. So this is kind of like Stephen A. Smith going to the Lakers game. Now LeBron comes to ESPN and on ESPN says he's like on a Taylor Swift tour run right now. It started off with, I didn't want to address it. I wasn't going to address it, but since the video came out, I feel the need to address it. Are you kidding me? If there's one person that couldn't wait until the video dropped so you could address it, it's your ass. Ass. And he completely, like, missed the point. The whole point.

[Katie Nolan]

I mean, I don't know. It's not, it's not that much of a dis to be like, yeah, you, you clearly did this because you're self serving. That's obvious. Yeah, that's obvious.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right?

[Katie Nolan]

I. It's tough for LeBron because again, I agree with the initial point. And so now it's just like, you're coming off like you're, you're whining to a degree. It's. It just feels like you just look, you're the loser in this situation. I. I don't know. I think he should have made his son into the interview instead.

[John Marco Cerese]

Ooh.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Might not have been very. Or maybe it would be good. I don't know. I don't think I've ever heard Bronnie really talk. I like hearing LeBron say, Motherfucker, I don't think I was ever gonna get that moment. But yeah, it is tough because, like, the original thing that it was about, I do kind of see the Stephen A. Smith's side.

[Katie Nolan]

The dad can't be the. The son's gotta do. The problem is if it's daddy, the accusation is daddy's helping his little boy. And then if he's taking the lead too, it's just no good, right?

[John Marco Cerese]

It's like you're bullying my son for being a daddy's boy, and I show up at your house to say that he's not. It's like, well, then why are you here? If he's not a daddy's boy, if he can handle it all himself, why did you show up to my house to fight me?

[Katie Nolan]

If he really is, I think what he should do is he should live televise. I don't know if Stephen A. Smith has a son son, but LeBron plays against Steven's son.

[John Marco Cerese]

I don't know. But I don't think he does, but I don't actually.

[Katie Nolan]

Well, then that's not a fair fight.

[John Marco Cerese]

So good.

[Katie Nolan]

He said as a father, though, right? Didn't Stephen A. Smith say, as a father, two daughters.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, two daughters.

[Katie Nolan]

Okay. LeBron versus both daughters in a. In a two on one basketball game. That's how you win.

[John Marco Cerese]

Bronnie versus the sons, right? Or no, the LeBron LeBron.

[Katie Nolan]

Just because that's funny. I want. Or the sons versus the daughters. Sure, anything. Maybe. Like, as a father, I wouldn't have trained my daughters to miss so many goddamn shots. Damn.

[John Marco Cerese]

Motherfucker. So the night that he went on Pat McAfee, Stephen A. Smith then dropped a video on his YouTube channel titled LeBron the lies keep Coming in which this is not a conspiracy, in which he said, quote, if that man put his hands on me, I would have immediately swung on him. Immediately. That I'm not going to tolerate.

[Katie Nolan]

Go for it.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

You're going to fight LeBron James.

[John Marco Cerese]

I would love if this all turned. Normally, I hate when a drama is made and then it's revealed that, like, oh, this is a work. Like this is. They're trying to promote a fight. I usually get annoyed if this were revealed that, like, oh, this is setting up a LeBron vs. Stephen A. Smith at, you know, a boxing match. I'd be like, okay, I'll watch that.

[Katie Nolan]

I'll watch that.

[John Marco Cerese]

I would totally watch that. LeBron responded to that video by posting a video of Stephen A. Smith boxing on ig. This is the video that he posted. Oh, boy, oh, boy. Why is that? Where'd he get that footage? That's horrendous. That's really bad.

[Katie Nolan]

It's at this point, first of all, LeBron's got a social media team. He's not posting this on his own. I know how this stuff works. He said to his team, like, hey, can you find a video of him boxing? And they hacked computers and they paid off everyone they could and they got this one video. So it's fine. At this point, I need to see. I want it to be personal again. I need to see them fight it out.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. So on March 27, this is the next day.

[Katie Nolan]

I cannot believe this is how this is still going.

[John Marco Cerese]

Stephen A. Smith goes on his show, first take, and spends the first 15 to 16 minutes just sort of addressing the previous day, stating that LeBron's only upset because Stephen A. Smith continues to say that Michael Jordan is the goat is better. It's like a common sports thing.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Who's better. Michael Jordan or LeBron James?

[Katie Nolan]

And I. I just don't understand. I mean, they do this with rap. They do this with musical theater. I haven't heard it too often. The goat. I'm gonna start bringing it in there.

[John Marco Cerese]

Go for it.

[Katie Nolan]

But I don't. I never unders. I really don't understand why the conversation is fun at a certain point, because there's no answer.

[John Marco Cerese]

Same.

[Katie Nolan]

But, like, do you enjoy. Do you enjoy it? I like going. It's just this constant thing where I go, like, this is a sign of things being broken, that you're like, but who was number one?

[John Marco Cerese]

Right?

[Katie Nolan]

I need to know that in my.

[John Marco Cerese]

Brain, ignoring all the factors of how different the league is now than it was then. And all the.

[Katie Nolan]

Who cares?

[John Marco Cerese]

They'll never play against each other. There's no reason to know which one of them is better.

[Katie Nolan]

It's like a way for guys. They're like, I've known the fight right now. Yeah, I know. I'll make a claim of something that we can debate, and there's no answer. So we can. Whenever we need to fight. You know who the goat is. You can just bring it up. That's why.

[John Marco Cerese]

So that sounds kind of like what's happening here. Stephen A. Smith said the only reason that he's really mad. The root issue is that Stephen A. Smith thinks Michael Jordan is better than LeBron James. Quote, that's how petty you've become. When has LeBron ever done something like that? The man is in his feelings. I wonder why. Could it be because I don't believe you're the goat? Smith went on to question why LeBron was absent from Dwayne Wade's hall of Fame ceremony. That's a former teammate. And wrongly claimed that LeBron was not present for Kobe Bryant's public memorial, which I guess he was, but he asked not to be photographed, but he basically said, like, you didn't go to Dwayne Wade's hall of Fame ceremony, and you didn't go to Kobe Bryant's funeral.

[Katie Nolan]

Wait, I'm sorry. LeBron was there but asked not to.

[John Marco Cerese]

Be photographed at Kobe Bryant's memorial, and.

[Katie Nolan]

He'S claiming he wasn't there at all.

[John Marco Cerese]

He wasn't there.

[Katie Nolan]

I. Where are they playing games at any point? Like, I feel like I've never.

[John Marco Cerese]

I had no idea there was all this time.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, they need to get to. They need to focus on their jobs.

[John Marco Cerese]

What? Is this true? Later that night, Stephen A. Smith posted a message on X, or maybe it was later that morning, saying My apologies in clarification. I misspoke in hour one of First Take today when I intimated that LeBron did not attend Kobe Bryant's memorial. I corrected myself in hour two. It's a long show. When I acknowledged that he was indeed in attendance. My mistake should not have broached the subject. It was not my main point. I retract nothing else that I said. Have a nice day.

[Katie Nolan]

This, this made me dislike Stephen A. Smith even more. Yeah, this is all. This is all horseshit. Yeah, this is all we. Well, if you watched me for the full three hours, then you would understand that I added extra context. I apologize. To bring up Kobe Bryant is classless.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

To bring up someone's attendance as at a funeral is classless. Any now he's changed it to it being about something else.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

It was very clear why LeBron was mad because you talked about his son.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

It is fair. He decided to put his son in the game and that's what happens. And that cannot be the precedent for sports. Yeah, but Stephen A. Smith has done too much at this point. He's tried to milk it for too much.

[John Marco Cerese]

This is good clear headed analysis. This is very. That was very good analysis.

[Katie Nolan]

But the fact that anyone said like Stephen A. Smith for president and I guess that's what you have to do these days, you have to bullshit that much.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yes.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, but I don't like that he.

[John Marco Cerese]

Speaks well, that's the only. He's an interesting and influential speaker. But like sometimes if you just read what he said, if you just have me read his quotes, they're more plainly stupid.

[Katie Nolan]

Sometimes I think LeBron, I let him fight.

[John Marco Cerese]

Let him fight.

[Katie Nolan]

Sometimes. There's sometimes in society where I look at all this stuff and I go like, if I'm not saying violence fully, but like occasionally, right. The thought that you could get punched.

[John Marco Cerese]

It should always be. There should always exist threat of potentially getting punched in your face. I do feel like we've fundamentally changed.

[Katie Nolan]

If I was on a jury, if this was like if he punched him and now we're in the court case and you read me what you just read me, I'd go, at least he got it. He gets at least one punch, right?

[John Marco Cerese]

For sure to the face, two to the body, one to the face.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

I think, okay, that was a clear headed analysis of a difficulty situation. Okay. And then lastly we have this little segment we do. It's called you don't see that every day. And it is where a bunch of things happened in sports that you don't See every day. And it's. That's really the conceit of the whole segment. So I'm just going to tell you about these things. Great. And. And we'll talk about them. So the Chicago Bulls scored nine points in 12.6 seconds of a game.

[Katie Nolan]

Oh, my God.

[John Marco Cerese]

To beat the Lakers at the very, very end. This clip radicalized our producer. Isabella is not really a sports fan. We're trying to get her into sports. And she watched this game, I think, by accident. It was just on. And she said this made her go, like, I want more of that. It was 1:15 to 1:10. There were 12.6 seconds left. I mean, this is so basketball y. But Giddy inbounds the pass. Then the ball's passed to Patrick Williams. He hits a corner three. Okay, so now it's 115 to 113. Then Giddy steals LeBron's inbound pass, and he finds Kobe White for a second. Bulls three in quick succession. So now Chicago's up 116 to 115, and there's 6.1 seconds remaining. Austin Reeves from the Lakers then makes a driving layup to put The Lakers ahead 117, 116 with 3.3 seconds left left. And then with no timeouts remaining, Giddy inbounds the ball to Williams from the baseline. Then he got the ball back, takes one dribble, and launches a shot from beyond half court. It goes in.

[Katie Nolan]

This is a problem. LeBron, he was thinking about, I'm gonna go on ESPN. I'm gonna say. I'm gonna say, motherfucker. I'm gonna say motherfucker. And espn, and he's not focused on the game. That's cool. Listen, sports, if I'm watching basketball and it's in that last quarter, I go, great. My only complaint about sports is you need some more editing. You play the game. Go in the editing room, cut out the parts that nothing really happens. I think baseball, if baseball was. Every game was two minutes. Yeah, I'm in.

[John Marco Cerese]

I believe what you're describing is SportsCenter.

[Katie Nolan]

Sure.

[John Marco Cerese]

Highlight package.

[Katie Nolan]

Maybe that's what I need to see.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, you just want to watch that package.

[Katie Nolan]

I need it so condensed. I wait for the documentary 20 years later, and I go, oh, wow, the Bulls over 10 episodes.

[John Marco Cerese]

Sure, yeah. Yeah, fair enough.

[Katie Nolan]

30 under 30 was the greatest invention because they said to people like me, listen, we know. Can you take 30 minutes?

[John Marco Cerese]

You know what's really funny is that he just called it 30 under 30, which is clearly the industry. What they give you when you're under 30 years old.

[Katie Nolan]

My girlfriend just got 35 under 35 for the Hollywood Report.

[John Marco Cerese]

Since when do they do fives?

[Katie Nolan]

Well, thank God, because she qualified for it.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's funny. Everybody I know that ever wins those things, like, wins it at the buzzer. They're like, I am turning 30 and I just got 30 under 30.

[Katie Nolan]

Y.

[John Marco Cerese]

The sports documentary is 34 30.

[Katie Nolan]

34 30.

[John Marco Cerese]

That's why it's funny when you're like, 30 under 30 was the best thing ever. It's like, well, kind of. Okay, you have mentioned before that SNL is sports for you. And so this is sports. To say Morgan Wallen walks off stage at the end during the. What do they call this? The goodbyes.

[Katie Nolan]

The final goodbyes.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. Of snl.

[Katie Nolan]

There's a couple things. There's one part of me that goes like, he just didn't know. Yeah, he just didn't know. For him, this is like me doing the first pitch at a baseball game.

[John Marco Cerese]

Okay.

[Katie Nolan]

You know, a sketch comedy show that's.

[John Marco Cerese]

Giving a lot of grace.

[Katie Nolan]

It's giving a lot of grace. Otherwise, who knows? It's weird. It's definitely weird. It's not like, cool or badass. And so many people were spinning it like, yeah, he told those SNL people he said yes to the job. He said yes to the job. He walked to 30 Rock and gave them his license and they gave him a pass and he went every day and he made sure the lighting and maybe they didn't get along or anything. He did the show. People sometimes do not understand, like, how the business element works. So they acted like. He sure showed them BY what, filling 10 minutes of time for their TV show on a Saturday, Being the biggest name and making sure that his fan base watched snl. So at the end of the day, if it was a rude walk off thing, it doesn't look cool because you agreed to do it.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

To not go at all.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

If. If, like the song started and he came out and. And then he said this and walked off, I go, wow, that's a rebellion. Oh, you did your job. And then at the end, you were kind of.

[John Marco Cerese]

You left a little early from the thing that was over.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

And then posted a picture of your private.

[Katie Nolan]

Of your private jet going, oh, back. Back to the roots of America in my private country.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. What are we.

[Katie Nolan]

What about the people who. What about all the people who worked at snl? Everybody. I mean, it's fine if you want to hate all the actors. There's people building the sets, there's people doing good things.

[John Marco Cerese]

The hair and makeup department is crazy.

[Katie Nolan]

By the way, when he's going back to America country, he's got eyeliner on from the makeup person who made him look prettier. And you know what he said? He probably was a dick about it. He said, not enough eyeliner. I need more eyeliner, some more mascara. Fuck off. You're in show biz. You're in showbiz. You are part of that legacy. You're part of that system.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. The system that lets you be here and thrive despite past transgressions.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Known past transgressions.

[Katie Nolan]

He was just too mad because he couldn't say the N word on us. And all that time he was like.

[John Marco Cerese]

I gotta get back home in God's country. God says the N word all the time. It's a real problem. Been meaning to talk to her about it. This. You don't. Okay, so you don't see that every day.

[Katie Nolan]

I love God is a woman, but she's racist.

[John Marco Cerese]

Super racist. That's why we don't mind when people say it's a guy. It's like, yeah, well, whatever. This I found really interesting. Other people might not. You don't see this every day. So there is a group of 24 MLB players that are known as the Lost Boys. They are players whose entire careers occurred in 2020 during the COVID season where there were no fans in any of the stands. So these are 24 players who have only ever played because like, they either their careers didn't work out or they went to the minors after their only pro career happened in that weird season with no fans. And they called them the Lost Boys. It's like a sad thing. Yesterday, Monday, one of those 24, probably the only one who will ever get a second chance, Kyle Hart got to play. He started against the Guardians. What happens is after the 2020 season, he bounced around the minor leagues. Then he went over to Korea. Last year he played for the NC Dinos in the Korean Baseball League. He had 182 strikeouts and he won the Korean equivalent of the Cy Young, which is the award we give to the best pitcher in the league. So he basically was the best pitcher in Korea. Made such waves over there that they brought him back. He got signed by the Padres and then last night he got to play in a stadium in front of a ton of fans. He pitched five innings, two earned runs, four strikeouts. I thought that was. I've like, as a concept, I'm like, that is Heartbreaking.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

You make it to the show, but no one's there.

[Katie Nolan]

I wonder if they look at the stats for those games, like how it was affected by not having like people cheering or booing or whatever.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And it's gotta be stress. If I did, if I started my whole professional standup career for no audience.

[John Marco Cerese]

Right.

[Katie Nolan]

And then later, four people, I'd be like, what's this? Laughter.

[John Marco Cerese]

Like those people who do stand up in their apartments during COVID I did it.

[Katie Nolan]

I did it.

[John Marco Cerese]

But did you, but did you make it look like you were live and edit in an audience? I feel like I saw a couple of those.

[Katie Nolan]

No, I, I, I didn't have the skill. I, if I could, I would. I. But you know, you go on zoom, you put them, you take them off mute and then someone would take a phone call and you'd hear a murder and you go, well, that's ruined the joke. You murdered someone during my setup. So it was bad.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And I wonder, I wonder if he gets overwhelmed. I wonder if he has to look at like whatever empty chairs are in the stadium and be like, no one's.

[John Marco Cerese]

Here, they're all in their underwear type of a situation. Situation. I thought that was cool that he got to do that.

[Katie Nolan]

That's really sweet.

[John Marco Cerese]

Here's another thing you don't see every day. There is a. Nashville has a hockey team called the Predators.

[Katie Nolan]

No.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Are you serious?

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

Still.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. They're the National Predators. They're like a newer team too.

[Katie Nolan]

They're called the Nat.

[John Marco Cerese]

The Nashville Predators. It's like a.

[Katie Nolan]

What they're, that's people walking around with shirts that say Predator.

[John Marco Cerese]

Their logo is, I believe, like a saber tooth, something. It's like a, like a Hollywood producer. It's a, it's an animal. And nobody really. I love that that's your first reaction because that's not really. People are usually just like fine with it. So there was this post was made on the, on their, on the. Okay. This was a post from Reddit. It's called I catfished a Predator off Twitter. Somebody wrote, I saw a random OnlyFans account or something selling nudes. And I clicked to read who was replying to these posts. I found a dude leaving his number, made a text, now, basically led this dude on. I sent a picture of a big, you know, member was just jealous. This is, it kind of goes. I said, screw it, let's continue messing with him. I agreed to meet at a motel, brought up a 16 year old sister that doesn't exist at first and he was like, no, I'm not a pedo. But then he brought it up a few texts later. Long story short, he wants to sleep with me and my fake underage sister. I reported him to the authorities. RIP I catfished a predator. This was posted in R Predators because I. And somebody responded. Lol, bud. This is the sub for the Nashville Predators hockey team.

[Katie Nolan]

We don't got a problem with that behavior.

[John Marco Cerese]

Just think it's funny that this guy must have searched, like, predator subreddit and then assumed when he got to R Predators that it was, I don't know, a subreddit of predators. I don't know what he would have thought it was.

[Katie Nolan]

What sport is this again?

[John Marco Cerese]

Hockey.

[Katie Nolan]

Hockey is, at one point, the goalie. It's like to catch a predator at some point. And they're like, that's our new name. That's. That's a crazy name to have for a team. I don't. That person's whole. Whole life is wild.

[John Marco Cerese]

Wild.

[Katie Nolan]

Also, I clicked under the OnlyFans link because I was looking for.

[John Marco Cerese]

Sure, sure. Yeah. I bet you were hunting.

[Katie Nolan]

But that's very funny.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah.

[Katie Nolan]

And they need to change that name immediately. I think that needs to be the next round of team names that get changed.

[John Marco Cerese]

An extra layer of funny because he said he catfished a predator. The Predators fans, I don't remember why, but they throw a catfish on the ice. Sometimes you'll sneak a catfish into a game and throw it under a real catfish. Yeah, Dead usually, I believe, but they've thrown a catfish.

[Katie Nolan]

This whole team has to be wiped off, too.

[John Marco Cerese]

I should have given you better lore for them to fully understand what's going on here. Tell our listeners on that note where they can find you.

[Katie Nolan]

I'm torn all over. I'm going to Europe. I'm here in America and Canada, Australia next. Just find me online. Giamarco Cerese. That is my handle for everything. Giammarco Cerese and I have a podcast called the Downside.

[John Marco Cerese]

It's very funny. It's, like, supposed to be about sad, but it's funny.

[Katie Nolan]

He has people coming on and they complain. So Dan came on and we just go and we step parents. That's all we talked about. Stepparents and dads.

[John Marco Cerese]

One of his stepdads.

[Katie Nolan]

We all hate one of our stepdads.

[John Marco Cerese]

He was, like, a swimmer. Used to make Dan go to his, like, swim meets.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. My dad let me quit the swim team, so I'm like, I'm jealous. It's always the grass is greener. My dad, I said, the pool's too cold. He said, well, then you don't have to do it, son.

[John Marco Cerese]

God, I wish.

[Katie Nolan]

No, I wish we have Flip. You're like, yeah. My mom said, follow your dreams and dance. And I was like, mom, could you be practical, please?

[John Marco Cerese]

Whatever. I minored. Thank you for being here. This was so much fun. Do you like sports now?

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah. I'm down. I'm down. I love the drama.

[John Marco Cerese]

Sold.

[Katie Nolan]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

If you ever see anything in sports you want to talk about, you can come here. We'll always have you. We're very happy to have you.

[Katie Nolan]

Thank you very much.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah, no problem. Okay. We've reached the C block of our lovely podcast, which means it's time for producer Chris to tell us what we can watch this week if we want to watch sports. Chris, what do you got?

[C]

Well, we're getting to the pointy end of the NCAA tournament for both the men's and the women's. The men's Final Four will be taking place this Saturday night with the championship game on Monday night. The women's Final Four, both games are on Friday night with the championship game on Sunday at 3pm Eastern. The game out of all of these games that I think everyone should check though is number two, UConn against number one, UCLA. That game is on Friday at 9pm Eastern on ESPN. You're watching this purely because of Paige Beckers. She has 105 points over her last three games. That is insane. That is obviously capped off with the 40 point performance a couple of games ago. But throw in another couple of 30 plus games in there and you've just got someone in one hell of a run. So make sure you check out Paige Beckers and Yukon take on UCLA on Friday at 9pm Eastern on ESPN.

[John Marco Cerese]

Did you say we were coming to the pointy end of the pointy?

[C]

Yeah.

[John Marco Cerese]

Okay.

[Katie Nolan]

Yep.

[John Marco Cerese]

Yeah. All right. Sure. No, yeah. I've just never. What else?

[C]

Number two, the Capitals at the Islanders. This is NHL. We are officially on OV Watch. He's only five goals away from breaking the record. So this is going to be part of what to watch this week until he breaks it, essentially, because it's going to happen any week now. They play the Islanders at 12:30pm Eastern on Sunday. That game's on Mac. They've got three games on before this. They play Bruins tonight. They play the Hurricanes and the Blackhawks later this week before facing off against the Islanders on Sunday. Can he get five goals within the next four games? There's a chance. We'll See, make sure you check out that game and just keep your eyes on on how he's going throughout the week as well, because you do not want to Ms. Ov. Break the record.

[John Marco Cerese]

That's right. Good tease, Chris. We're long, so I'm just gonna say, what's the last thing?

[C]

Braves v Dodgers tonight, 10.10pm Eastern. You can watch that on Fubo. It's Chris Sale versus Dustin May. Dustin May is starting his first game since May 2023. We spoke about him a couple of weeks ago. He had that injury eating a salad tore his esophagus. And so he is playing for the first time since that injury. Dodgers undefeated so far this season. Braves yet to win a game. It's gonna be fun.

[John Marco Cerese]

Sick. The Braves haven't won a game.

[C]

Braves05.

[Katie Nolan]

Steroids were not working.

[John Marco Cerese]

Oh, boy. Yeah, that's tough. You lose jerks in profar and you haven't won a game yet. Okay, thank you, Chris. Those were all good things. I think we're all going to watch all of those sports this week. That's it for casuals, you guys. What a fun episode. Big thanks to John Marco for being here. Thanks to everybody who listened for listening. As always, if you want to reach us, it's Casuals with Katie nolan gmail dot com. Our voicemail is 646-801-0043. And on IG and Tik Tok, we are at Casuals, the podcast. We will see you back here on Thursday for another wild adventure in the world of sports and all that it touches. We love you and we mean it. Bye.