Discovering The Trad Wife Debate

Summary

Episode Summary: Discovering The Trad Wife Debate

Cate & Ty Break It Down
Episode: Discovering The Trad Wife Debate
Release Date: July 30, 2025

---

Introduction

In this engaging episode of Cate & Ty Break It Down, hosts Catelynn (Kate) and Tyler (Ty) Baltierra delve into the nuanced and often contentious discussion surrounding the "trad wife" movement. Balancing personal anecdotes with broader societal debates, they offer listeners a heartfelt exploration of traditional gender roles versus modern feminist ideals.

Camping Adventures and Quality Time

The episode begins with Kate and Ty sharing their recent spontaneous camping trip, marking their first getaway alone in two years. They reflect on the challenges of disconnecting from their busy family lives and the unique experiences of camping without their children.

Tyler [01:52]: "Just because we're on TV doesn't mean that we're not."

During their trip, they encounter strangers who recognize them, highlighting the blend of their public persona with private moments. This segment underscores the importance of carving out personal time to strengthen their relationship amidst the demands of fame and parenthood.

Introducing the Trad Wife Debate

Transitioning from personal stories, Kate introduces the topic that piqued her interest: the "trad wife" debate. Initially mistaking "trad wife" for "trade wife," she quickly grasps the concept, prompting a deeper discussion between the hosts.

Tyler [15:00]: "It's short for traditional wife."

They define a trad wife as a married woman who embraces traditional gender roles, often idolizing the 1950s housewife lifestyle. This involves prioritizing homemaking, domestic duties, and supporting her husband as the primary breadwinner. The hosts note that many trad wives actively promote their lifestyle on social media, emphasizing submission and conventional femininity.

Analyzing the Trad Wife vs. Feminism Debate

Kate and Ty recount watching a heated debate between trad wives and feminists, revealing stark contrasts in viewpoints. Trad wives advocate for a return to traditional roles, asserting that feminism has disrupted societal norms and women's place in the household.

Kate [17:38]: "It was legal that you could rape your wife, marital rape was legal is insane to me."

This leads to a poignant discussion on the historic legal stance on marital rape in the U.S., highlighting how far women's rights have come due to the feminist movement.

Tyler [23:56]: "Prior to the 1970s it was legal in all U.S. States, stemming from the historical legal concept of a husband's right to sexual access to his wife."

The hosts express their disagreement with the trad wife ideology, emphasizing their commitment to a 50/50 partnership in their marriage.

Tyler [16:43]: "Our household does not run like that. It is very 50/50."

They discuss the importance of feminism in securing fundamental rights for women, such as voting, financial independence, and personal autonomy, arguing that these advancements have enabled women to lead fulfilling lives both personally and professionally.

Parenting with Equality and Independence

Shifting focus to parenting, Kate and Ty discuss how they instill values of independence and equality in their children. They share personal stories about overcoming fears and building trust, ensuring their kids feel secure and empowered.

Tyler [05:04]: "These videos of parents saying you go on vacation without the kids, and then you catch yourself looking at everything that your kids would enjoy, and you're like, it's so annoying."

They emphasize the importance of allowing their children the freedom to explore and make decisions, contrasting this approach with the restrictive dynamics often associated with the trad wife movement.

Historical Context and Societal Shifts

The conversation delves into the historical context of women's rights, highlighting significant milestones achieved through the feminist movement. They reflect on the struggles women faced in the past, from being denied the right to vote to lacking financial independence.

Kate [21:22]: "We're only 33, so I mean, come on, man. Like."

This segment underscores the ongoing need for advocacy and education to address remaining inequalities, asserting that the feminist movement remains vital for achieving true gender equality.

Encouraging Open Dialogue and Understanding

Towards the end of the episode, Ty invites listeners who identify as trad wives to engage in open conversations on the podcast. He emphasizes the value of understanding differing perspectives to foster mutual respect and societal harmony.

Tyler [27:55]: "If you are a trad wife out there and you're listening to this, like, not... if you are a trad wife and like Ty said, not like super. I don't know, I would like to get a non biased."

Kate echoes this sentiment, expressing curiosity and a desire to hear firsthand experiences from those who champion traditional roles outside of religious motivations.

Kate [28:14]: "I just want to know what's going on with the whole society movement here."

Conclusion

The episode concludes with Kate and Ty reflecting on the importance of balancing personal relationships with societal expectations. They advocate for continued dialogue and education to bridge divides and promote understanding, reinforcing their commitment to equality and shared responsibilities in their marriage and family life.

---

Notable Quotes:

• Tyler [01:52]: "Just because we're on TV doesn't mean that we're not."
• Tyler [15:00]: "It's short for traditional wife."
• Kate [17:38]: "It was legal that you could rape your wife, marital rape was legal is insane to me."
• Tyler [23:56]: "Prior to the 1970s it was legal in all U.S. States, stemming from the historical legal concept of a husband's right to sexual access to his wife."
• Tyler [16:43]: "Our household does not run like that. It is very 50/50."
• Tyler [05:04]: "These videos of parents saying you go on vacation without the kids, and then you catch yourself looking at everything that your kids would enjoy, and you're like, it's so annoying."
• Kate [21:22]: "We're only 33, so I mean, come on, man. Like."
• Tyler [27:55]: "If you are a trad wife out there and you're listening to this, like, not... if you are a trad wife and like Ty said, not like super. I don't know, I would like to get a non biased."
• Kate [28:14]: "I just want to know what's going on with the whole society movement here."

---

This detailed summary captures the essence of the episode, highlighting the key discussions on traditional gender roles, feminism, parenting, and the importance of open dialogue. Through personal stories and informed debate, Kate and Tyler provide listeners with a comprehensive understanding of the trad wife debate and its implications in today's society.

Transcript

[Kate]

Valspar Ultra starts at just $29.98 a gallon, so we've got you covered when your daughter wants to paint her room again after last year's masterpiece of a unicorn mural.

[Tyler]

Dad, please.

[Kate]

Or when you realize that maybe you went too hard on the grayish.

[Tyler]

I miss color.

[Kate]

Or when you are sure you wanted a home gym, but your elliptical is currently hanging your laundry. What about a home office? Shop everything you need for your next phase with Valspar. Available at Lowe's. Price varies by sheen.

[Tyler]

Well, if you can't tell, it's Wednesday again, which means another episode of Kate and Ty Break it down again. Thank you for all the support and the love, and please always make sure to rate and review and follow our show, because that really helps us out.

[Kate]

We love you.

[Tyler]

Yes, actually. Well, this weekend, Tyler and I actually got to get away out of the blue for the weekend. So we got to go camping, just me and him, for the first time.

[Kate]

This summer, which was so nice.

[Tyler]

It was nice.

[Kate]

We haven't done that in, I think, years.

[Tyler]

A couple. Yeah. Two years.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Because we didn't last summer, but the.

[Kate]

Summer before, we did, like, what, Once.

[Tyler]

One time.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

We went to Sleepers. But, yeah, I mean, Ty's niece has been over here for a few days, and she was like, hey, if you guys want to go away this weekend, I could use the extra money, and I'm sure you guys could use the break. And I looked at Tiny like, I mean, we should take the opportunity when we get it.

[Kate]

Yeah. You were like, well, I don't know if we should or not. I'm like, dude, what?

[Tyler]

I know.

[Kate]

You don't know.

[Tyler]

Well, because me and you were going camping this weekend.

[Kate]

I know. We.

[Tyler]

Camp girl. What are we doing? Camp. I know. You know what's funny, too, is when we were camping this weekend, some, like, older lady came up to us and she was like, oh, you guys rent a cabin? And I was like, no, we have a camper. She's like, oh, you guys have a camper? I'm like, yeah, bro. Just because we're on TV doesn't mean that we're not.

[Kate]

Like, oh, she recognized. Okay, okay.

[Tyler]

But for a minute, I was like, do you think that, like, I don't know, people that are on TV, like, don't camp. They just rent cabins.

[Kate]

Like, I mean, the cabins are nice, though. We did it before.

[Tyler]

They are super nice.

[Kate]

But I don't know. We've always camped. I can't my whole life. That's literally the only thing my mom could Afford, Right.

[Tyler]

That was your guys's vacations?

[Kate]

That was it.

[Tyler]

Yeah. We never camped, so. Which is so weird.

[Kate]

Your dad is so outdoorsy. I don't know why you guys never camped.

[Tyler]

We would do, like, little backyard things, like sleeping in the backyard or backyard and swimming in ponds and streams and, you know, stuff. Like, outdoorsy stuff. But, yeah, not really, like, camping.

[Kate]

I'm shocked. I heard that.

[Tyler]

So the first time, like, really ever getting into camping and, like, the camping world is definitely when I met you and, like, your mom and stuff is what got me into it.

[Kate]

But we did.

[Tyler]

I love it. It's one of my favorite things to do.

[Kate]

It's not expensive.

[Tyler]

It's like, you don't have to be expensive.

[Kate]

I mean. All right, all right, all right. But still, like, you know, when compared vacation.

[Tyler]

Right, Right. No.

[Kate]

Yeah, Come on.

[Tyler]

Way cheaper.

[Kate]

It's nice.

[Tyler]

And we've, you know, we've raised all of our kids now to be campers. They love it and they. Yeah, they love camping. And so hopefully that's something that they'll continue to pass on. No going back to the whole, like, sprung on us. You guys want to leave, you know, And Ty was like, just take the opportunity. We need to take the opportunities when you get them. And I'm like, I know. But then I felt guilty. Like, the mom guilt sets in, because I'm like, all right, well, we're going this weekend, too. But then I kind of, like, justified the mom guilt because I was like, well, if we're going camping by ourselves two weekends in a row, we come back from camping this next weekend. And then, like, three days later, we're taking all the kids camping anyways.

[Kate]

Exactly. They're all going. We're gonna be spending money, ice cream, water park, splash pad. Here we go. I mean, come on.

[Tyler]

I know, but, you know, that mom guilt, it's like, oh, no, now I'm away, and I'm like, well, Kate, you haven't really been away from them all summer besides work.

[Kate]

Like, what if mom guilt. Really? What is that?

[Tyler]

You don't ever have, like, dad guilt?

[Kate]

I guess not. I mean, I get what you're. I get what you mean. I understand what you're saying, but at the same time, it's like, our kids are. Have so many days that they're going to be here with us. Like, it's okay. We can take two days.

[Tyler]

No, I get that. Yeah. But I feel. I don't know, you ever go to, like, a place. Okay, so you go. And I know this is relatable. Because I've seen people talk about it, and. And I. Obviously, it related to me because I'm talking about it, but there's these videos of, like, parents saying you go on vacation without the kids, and then you catch yourself looking at everything that your kids would enjoy, and you're like, it's so annoying.

[Kate]

What was I doing this weekend?

[Tyler]

Oh, yeah, we were.

[Kate]

Look at that little baby over there. Oh, look at him. Oh, man, look at that.

[Tyler]

Oh, look at that little girl.

[Kate]

Look at that little boy.

[Tyler]

Our neighbors, when we were camping even was like, oh, I'm so. So you got. You know, you got to get away from your three kids now. You know, you're next door to somebody who has all three kids. And me and Ty were like, oh, my God, they're fine, and were really good kids. And he's like, ah, yeah, okay. And I'm like, no, they have been like. We were talking about how they.

[Kate]

They were in the camper, they ride their bikes around, put their helmets on. I'm like, damn, look at them listening.

[Tyler]

Didn't ask, mom, can you come stand by when I ride my bike?

[Kate]

Why is our kid like that? I don't know if any of the other kids are like that, but, like, our kid won't go outside. Like, they. She wants someone outside.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

It's like, dude, I have big windows all around the house. I see everything's going on just for.

[Tyler]

People that don't know. Like, we live in the country, too, like, off of, like, a weird back street.

[Kate]

Back roads.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Two dirt roads. Like, nobody, you know? And we live on six acres, so it's not like. So, like, our kids could freely play around outside if they want you by themselves without me being out there.

[Kate]

And she's like, I don't want to be alone. I'm like, beta, you're not alone.

[Tyler]

But if. You know, she's always had this fear of being lost. You know how she always talks about that? Like, what happens if I get lost? Can I get lost if I'm here? And I'm like, well, you're not gonna get lost in the damn yard, dude. Just go ride your bike.

[Kate]

That one time, Nola got lost with her friend, and then we end up down this. Remember?

[Tyler]

Yes, that was.

[Kate]

Okay. Listen, that panic, though, is. Is, like, something.

[Tyler]

I thought her friend was smart. Yeah, that was crazy. So you have to give them the backstory because.

[Kate]

Okay, so one time, our oldest was with her friend, and they were probably, like, eight. Yeah, they're probably, I don't know, seven or eight. And they walk down. We have, like, a little easement. They walk down. Like. No, it's. No one comes down that road because. Because it's only leads to our other roads, right. So they're walk up and down at this fine. And then all of a sudden, they made, like, a left turn, right. I don't know what they did.

[Tyler]

They walked to the dirt road, the main road.

[Kate]

The main, main one. There's two different roads. You got to get to get whatever. And they went to that one and just kept walking in.

[Tyler]

And then they got turned around, and.

[Kate]

I don't know how they. I really don't know how they got lost. I said, if you guys would have kept walking straight, you would end up seeing where we are, where we were.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And then all of a sudden, Noah's friend's mom is here because we're good friends with her, too. She gets a phone call, and she's like, yeah, you know, your daughter Ari is at my house. And we're all like, what? We thought the kids were just playing outside.

[Kate]

Yeah. We didn't even know they were walking down the other road.

[Tyler]

I'm like, what is going on? And so Alexa's like, okay, well, you know, our friend Alexa was like, well, this is the address we're at. And I'm like, well, I'm getting in my van. Like, I was already outside, like, getting in my van. What's going on? Go down the easement, go to the main road, and I look both ways and to the left, which is, like, away from our house. Far away from our house. I see the two girls walking with an adult female and an adult male. And so I drive up there, and I about put the fearing to God into these little kids. Yeah, you did, because you're 8 years old. You didn't even tell me, like, you were. Didn't ask if you could leave the yard. And I said, you're. And I said it right in front of these two adults. I said, you. You should be thankful that these two adults that you even went up to are good humans, because you can't just go up to anybody and go knock on somebody's door. Like, there's weird people in the world. Like, that's what freaked me out, too. Like, I mean, her friend, Noah's friend, was smart for, first of all, you know, knowing her mom's phone number and saying, hey, call my mom. And I told him that afterwards. I said, but, you know, you just can't, like, just go up to random people.

[Kate]

Like, that actually made a lot of Sense. Because then after that, we instilled like, this is our phone number. This is our phone number. This is our phone. Like, it was right.

[Tyler]

This is our address.

[Kate]

Yeah. Like, we had to do that whole, like, all right, we need to. Like. That was scary, though.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Terrifying. That. That panic was like. Yeah. Unexplainable.

[Tyler]

That's not the first time Nova's done that to me either.

[Kate]

Yeah, but that. When she was really little that time.

[Tyler]

Yeah. When she was super little, like, Caesar was still alive. We had our Doberman. Yeah. We just moved into the Octagon house. And she was probably. She was like, four, because Beta was just like a newborn baby. And our next door neighbor had two little girls or, you know, a little bit older than Nova when she was 4 or whatever. But Nova was like, I want to go play with these kids. And I'm like, well, we can probably do it tomorrow. We met the neighbor and everything. And I'm like, maybe tomorrow you can go play with them. I don't even know where you were, but you weren't even home.

[Kate]

No, I was. You called me. I was on my way. On my way back.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I don't even know where you were.

[Kate]

I don't know why I was either.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Like, I don't know if you had something. Obviously you had something.

[Kate]

I don't know what was going on.

[Tyler]

But I remember I woke up in the morning to, you know, Veda because she's a newborn, and Nova would always usually, like, come in my room if she wakes up in the morning and wake me up. That, you know, that's what they. That's what Veda does now, even today. And she didn't. So I thought she was still sleeping. I go downstairs with Veda, and we had, like, this tall coat hanger thing in our mud room in the Octagon house. And that thing was on the floor in the mud room. And I was like, what the. I go upstairs, Nova's not in a room, nowhere to be found. I run outside, panic. Well, I put Veda in her swing, actually, because, thank God, she's a newborn. She can't move her nothing. I know she'll be safe there. Put her in the swing. I run outside, and I was, like, screaming her name. And our seat. Our dog was not even in the house. So I'm screaming both of their names. I run to our chicken coop, because I'm thinking, four years old, she's obsessed with her chickens. Maybe she'll be out there. No, she's not in the chicken coop. Run to the horse barn. She's not in the horse barn. I'm screaming and screaming and screaming her name, and then all of a sudden, Caesar runs from the neighbor's house around the corner of the fence. And I'm like, what the. I go over there, and there's Nova just standing in their driveway, staring at their house. Our neighbor's house. She come. I go up to her, and I just start. So once, you know, you get over that panic. I just sobbing. And I just looked her. I said, you cannot do that. Like, that scared Mom. I thought somebody came in and, like, stole you. You were nowhere to be found. And then she didn't help because the.

[Kate]

Coat racks knocked over. It just looks so.

[Tyler]

What? I mean, it looked like there was literally a ruckus in the house.

[Kate]

Oh, my God.

[Tyler]

And ever since that day, like, I. Now the. When the kids get a certain age, like, I have weird little locks on my doors.

[Kate]

We have little beepers.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And just, like, the childproof ones that are high up where you fold over the door, they can't open the door because look at Raya. She's at the Adrian. She tries to open that back door all the time. So it's just like. So maybe this is why we need vacations. Every once you take people up on that.

[Kate]

Yeah, exactly.

[Tyler]

You know, it's where I get all my damn gray hair from. But no. So that was nice, though. We got to get away this weekend and just spend some time with one another. And I know.

[Kate]

We stayed up late laughing.

[Tyler]

I know. Yeah. The first night, we were up till like, two in the morning. Mom had a couple high noons. Never get to drink some high noons. And you know what?

[Kate]

Every time we go out by ourselves, we end up just staying up late, laughing, talking.

[Tyler]

Yeah, well. But there's nobody saying, hey, wow. Hey, dad. Hey. Hey, can you wait? My butt. You know what I mean? Like, there's just no distractions. Yeah. And it's rare for us now. Like, you know, you have one kid, you have Nova, and it's like grandparents wanted to shake her all the time, and aunts and uncles and all that. And then you have two kids, and, you know, one might go to one, grandma's one might go to the other. And then, you know, or. And sometimes one's gone, and you have one. You have three or four or more there. You're always got one of them at least.

[Kate]

Oh, yeah.

[Tyler]

You know what I mean? It's like, you don't. You always at least have one.

[Kate]

So it's rare to get all of them somewhere doing something.

[Tyler]

Right. And when you're. And to, like, not work.

[Kate]

Yeah, too.

[Tyler]

Like to just go and not have. I mean, literally, me and Ty, like, laid out by. In by the pond and the pool and just didn't do anything.

[Kate]

Yeah, we just laid out.

[Tyler]

I drink a blue slushy to myself.

[Kate]

Oh, blue slushy. No asking for drinks. No.

[Tyler]

You know, it was good. And I'm excited that we get to go next weekend and then the kids can go. You know, we're taking all the kids and our friends coming with their kids, too, so that'll be fun.

[Kate]

Last one right before school.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And then the kids don't even know what's coming in.

[Kate]

I know. We just did that whole thing, that little.

[Tyler]

I did order one.

[Kate]

Yep. There's like, this whole, like, I don't know, people know out there, but, like, there's this whole, like, you can, like, order, like, a announcement. Look it up on Tik Tok. Type in, like, Disney reveal travel or something.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Or announcement video.

[Kate]

Yeah, Announcement videos in Disney. You can, like, customize it so it tells the kids. They just think they're watching some movie.

[Tyler]

And it wasn't badly priced on. On Etsy. It was like 20 bucks. And you get dope access, like automatic access. And then I paid 20 bucks more to do the voiceover. So, like, Mickey will say their names.

[Kate]

They're gonna freak out.

[Tyler]

Hopefully. I know. So, you know, our kids are having a good year this year. We've camped a lot this summer, which. That's kind of what we do.

[Kate]

I know, right? I mean, well, we go on vacation with the kids, what, once every other year? Pretty much. So we at least go to, like, Florida or go to California or.

[Tyler]

True. We did. Yeah. We went to Florida in December.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

And when they were on Christmas break. So that worked.

[Kate]

Easter in Florida before.

[Tyler]

Yeah, we did that, too. Yeah. What, two years ago or so. Yeah. Not that. Yeah. Whatever it was we tried to do. We try to do vacations, but. So that's just a little snapshot of what we've been up to this weekend and this past week. All I know, too, is, like, Michigan. It was hot as today.

[Kate]

Unbearable.

[Tyler]

And then it was like we had all these heat advisories and stuff. And I'm like, wow, I didn't even know that was going on. Yeah. Marie, when you. We woke up this morning. Morning. And we're packing up the camper and everything, and Ty's just sweating, dude.

[Kate]

It was immediate. I was getting irritated with how fast it was dripping from My face. I'm like, all right, dude, I'm done being out here.

[Tyler]

Well, no. And you said you're like, I swear today's hotter than it was yesterday. It was. It was so hot. So hot. Hi, I'm Kristen Bell, and if you.

[Kate]

Know my husband Dax, then you also.

[Tyler]

Know he loves shopping for a car. Selling a car, not so much. We're really doing this, huh? Thankfully, Carvana makes it easy. Answer a few questions, put in your VIN or license, and done. We sold ours in minutes this morning.

[Kate]

And they'll come pick it up, up.

[Tyler]

And pay us this afternoon.

[Kate]

Bye.

[Tyler]

Bye, Truckee. Of course, we kept the favorite. Hello, other truckee. Sell your car with Carvana today. Terms and conditions apply. One of the things I wanted to talk about, because I don't. I. I noticed that you were listening to it and watching it or whatever, and you put it in our notes about trad wife, trad wife.

[Kate]

Everyone out there, trad wife, trad wives, whatever the hell it is. I watched a debate. It was trad white. I. I watched the video because I always like to watch these little debates about, like, opposing people, whatever. Anyway, so the. It's trad wives versus feminism or feminists or whatever.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Kate]

And I'm like. I just. It peaked my interest. I'm like, what the heck is a trad wife? At first I thought they misspelled and said trade wife. You know, I don't even know.

[Tyler]

So it's short for traditional wife.

[Kate]

Oh, oh, okay, got it. I'm thinking trade wife.

[Tyler]

Like, I don't know, as a Mary. So, yeah.

[Kate]

What's the official definition?

[Tyler]

It's a married woman who embraces traditional gender roles often associated with the lifestyle. Idolizing the 1950s housewife. This typically involves prioritizing homemaking, domestic duties, and supporting her husband, who is general, generally seen as the primary breadwinner. Trad wives often actively share their lifestyle and values on social media platforms and. And they focus on homemaking, embracing traditional generals. Emphasis on submission, I was gonna say.

[Kate]

Because what you're saying is sounding like, okay, basically, okay, you're. You know, I get a traditional white. No. These. No, dude.

[Tyler]

So, no, there's. There's.

[Kate]

Their answers were weird.

[Tyler]

Well, the debate that you were looking at was more like, they submit to their husbands. Their husbands rule the household. They stay home, take care of the kids, cook, clean.

[Kate]

It was more than just, like, doing the house stuff. You could tell in their answers, they were like, no, we believe in, like, the leader. We don't. We ask. We ask, like, they. He.

[Tyler]

You Know, they asked what.

[Kate]

All the decisions, all pretty much permission. Like, all the stuff you. It was insane.

[Tyler]

I was like, so is that, like, permission to, like, hey, I want to go get my hair cut? Well, what did you. How you gonna get it cut? I don't know.

[Kate]

I don't know how deep it goes, but all I know is what they were saying was, like, dude, I did not think that this was a real. Like, I thought we. I. I didn't know. This is a real thing.

[Tyler]

We're being a perfect wife. Okay, I'm just gonna say one thing. Our household does not run like that. It is very 50 50. We make decisions together. I teach our daughter be how they want to be. As a woman, you can have kids, not have kids. You can, you know, have 50 lizards if you want to when you're older. Like, I don't even care what you do as long as you're happy and healthy. Don't give a.

[Kate]

Well, what happened was they. They were pretty much saying that feminism were, like, root is ruining. Is the re. Pretty much the root cause of why everyone's. The way that. Why society's so jacked up. They're saying that, like, the society's always, no, no, like, they're saying, oh, it was. You know, it's jacked up. Now everyone's. You know, everyone's getting confused. And, you know, the feminism was made to, like, equality, but it's too much equality. And now we don't know our place and our role and where we have two different brain systems and we should.

[Tyler]

I swear, we should still know our place in this world is what they think.

[Kate]

You have to watch the debate, But I'm telling you, I. I kept watching Mike. I was so shocked by their answers, because what these other feminists were saying about, like, you know, and they're like, do you believe in divorce? And they were like, oh, yeah. It was a question to say, step forward if you believe so and so. Step forward if you believe so and so. And they asked a question, and one of them was, do you think it is ever okay for the woman to initiate divorce?

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Kate]

And they were like, no. Everyone's like, no, we do not. It was like, so it was like.

[Tyler]

A trad wife said no.

[Kate]

So then the. Yeah. So then the feminists were like, oh, wait a minute. Like, so you don't believe it at all? Like, that you. The woman should file for divorce. You know what I mean? He could beat you, rape you, whatever the case was and what they say. And they are pretty much like, yeah, that's pretty much how they, how they felt. And then eventually the girls like, you know, they kept talking about it cuz they're all open minded. So they're kept talking about it and they're like well what if he kept cheating and cheating and cheating and it was like oh, first offense. Then it's like oh, maybe the third time I would do something. I swear it was weird they were even fighting that. And then the girl said, oh, so you would get a divorce for that? And she's like, yeah. She said well you can thank feminists for being able to get divorced.

[Tyler]

Right?

[Kate]

And then I was like watching it and I'm like, I wonder like, because I. The fact always stuck with me that since, you know, it was, it was, it was legal and to rape your wife up until like 1993.

[Tyler]

Was it 93, I swear.

[Kate]

Look it up to confirm. I swear something around. But like the fact that it was legal that you could rape your wife, marital rape was legal is insane to me. And the fact that like that's not talked about enough like that that was eradicated because the feminist movement like what, what are we. So it was listening to this dude, I'm telling you, this debate was so.

[Tyler]

And that's weird. No, yeah, you're right. Marital rape became illegal nationwide in the US by 1993, though the legal landscape surrounding it evolved. Significant, evolved significantly over the preceding decades.

[Kate]

Like certain states obviously did it before.

[Tyler]

But prior to the 1970s it was legal in all U. S. States, stemming from the historical legal concept of a husband's right to sexual access to his wife.

[Kate]

Look at your face. You see that's what I'm saying.

[Tyler]

That's gross. Yeah, like it's a first dates. That's why I love my state. To partially outlaw it were Michigan and Delaware in 1974 and South Dakota and Nebraska fully criminalizing it in 1975. The first trial for marital rape while living together was in 1978 in Oregon.

[Kate]

Isn't that insane though?

[Tyler]

That's disgusting.

[Kate]

It was not federally protected. It wasn't.

[Tyler]

So she could say no and you're.

[Kate]

Just like yeah, yeah, whatever. I could, I could tie you up and, and it would be fine. You can call the cop and say I hate this, this is horrible.

[Tyler]

Right?

[Kate]

You know, yeah, he's raping me. And they would be like yeah, well he's allowed to. He's your husband. I know. Isn't that I telling you? That's why this is a bait I was listening to is. Anyway, the whole point of it Was I never heard of trad wife before until the other day. And I'm like, dude.

[Tyler]

And so. So part of me is like, I guess if that's what you want to do and it brings you joy, like true happiness and joy to stay home and listen to a man and do what you're told, then I guess, good for you. For me and for my girls, I'm teaching them, they don't. That they don't ever have to be in a kitchen if they don't want to be. And they don't have to be a mom if they don't want to be. And you stand up for women's rights and women power and power, you know?

[Kate]

Well, I think it's one of those things where it's like, you know, just. Just being normal. I think people get it confused where it's like, well, the feminine movement is not like to get rid of masculinity or to.

[Tyler]

No to.

[Kate]

To, you know, it's literally just for. Just equality.

[Tyler]

Right.

[Kate]

But no, no, just on the basis of sex. Just not like there's no discrimination. We can't. Because, I mean, hello, everyone really should be one if. If you knew what it really was about.

[Tyler]

Well, and it goes back to just things of like, you know, great grandmas and, you know, grandmas before them, like what they fought for, for women. It wasn't that long ago where women couldn't vote. We weren't allowed to have bank accounts, driver's license, we weren't allowed to buy a house. Yeah, you couldn't have a debit card, none of that.

[Kate]

And you could open a business.

[Tyler]

Right. And if you go and if you think about it like, we've never really fully been equal because we're not right now in a lot of things.

[Kate]

And it's like, I think people think, oh, we. It's like they, they. That's an old, old thing. It's like, no, no, it'll. The feminist movement will always be happening because until it. Until it doesn't need to be happening. You know what I mean?

[Tyler]

Right.

[Kate]

And it's like, we have a lot of work to do.

[Tyler]

We weren't even allowed to like, voting, like, vote, you know what I mean? Let alone even have a car to a bank, like my own money.

[Kate]

Think about it. We were 1 years old. You could. Some states legally allowed women to be raped.

[Tyler]

It wasn't that long ago.

[Kate]

You know, we're only 33, so I mean, come on, man. Like.

[Tyler]

But I'm like, okay, yeah. So if. I mean, those women that like, the trad wife stuff, whatever.

[Kate]

I just didn't know if you ever heard of that before.

[Tyler]

I mean I have seen like a couple things on Tick Tock and like I'll watch it and I'll be like. I mean honestly, the first thought that comes to my mind is you're crazy. Honestly. No, I'm just being real. Like when I watch, I'm like that, no, thank you.

[Kate]

Well and then I. Even when like I. And I guess what one thing that it was is that there were so many comments on certain stuff talking about like, yes, amen, God bless. Like, yes is what we do.

[Tyler]

So is it very religion based?

[Kate]

Very. The, the debate. There was not one trad wife that was not a Christian or really into their faith. And they actually rebuttal against these feminists. You know what they were saying, using that, you know, the religion, like pretty much, you know, weaponizing it. I mean, not my opinion. They were all very much like, no, this is what it says.

[Tyler]

And well, that's how you interpret it. I know I might interpret it differently. You know what I mean? The Bible and religion is meant to be interpreted.

[Kate]

It is one of those things where it's like. I think it's like if you believe that there's a lot of shamanic healers that are rooted in Christ consciousness, where they literally chew. They believe all the things you believe, but they don't discount certain things that were taken out at certain times and throughout history. They know all about Mary Magdalene, you know what I mean? They read the old scrolls that they decide to take out whatever they study stuff. And the only way to know is to study language. You have to be a really good expert in different languages to even understand the original translation. So it goes back lots of, lots of, you know, whatever. But it's like, I think people get it all confused where it's like, like almost like because they were saying certain stuff about how like well, we just don't. Our belief, you know, based. Because they would ask them like, okay, why do you believe this? Like, what is it? Well, we believe with my faith. My faith, My faith. And it was like interesting. I was like, I'm not hearing anything come from your, like your own opinion. Yeah, like. And then when they ask them what.

[Tyler]

Their husband's probably telling them, they can't have an opinion.

[Kate]

I don't know. But it was just. I don't know, it was just very interesting. I never heard that term before and I not really sure that I'm like, this is why this happening. How do we get so far. Why are we having these old archaic things? I guess. Listen, I. Cool. Like you said, if it's up to you, it makes you happy. It really makes you happy. It's awesome.

[Tyler]

I mean, I can understand certain things. Like. And I feel like it's just like mutual respect. Like, if you're gone, you know, and you're some. Something's going on, whatever. If you come home, it makes me feel good to like, oh, he's gonna come home and I'm gonn house clean and dinner made. But I don't do. Because I feel like I have to. Or. And I don't do it all the time either, you know?

[Kate]

Yeah. You know, it's just kind of like.

[Tyler]

Certain things where it's like, it'll bring me joy, you know, and make the house smell good, but I also do it for myself, not just you either.

[Kate]

Right, Exactly.

[Tyler]

And vice versa. Like, when I would be going and doing things, there's plenty of times where I'd come home and I would have cook. Dinner was being cooked and the house was spotless and the kids were clean. Because, I mean, as a significant other, that's just things you do when the other person isn't around or they're not.

[Kate]

Right. I mean, and it doesn't feel one of those things where it's like, I will honor thy wife and I. You know, like. But it doesn't. It doesn't feel like. Like you said, I'm not doing it for the other person. I'm doing it because we both live in this house and I like clean dishes. Like. You like clean dishes. I like cooked dinner.

[Tyler]

Like, you know what I'm saying? It doesn't even have to be cooked dinner. You could be like, yeah, babe, I'm ordering a pizza, you know, all right, cool. Whatever. There's food there, you know. I don't know. Is it. When you were watching and stuff, did it kind of come off, like, I don't know, like, old school, like, cultish?

[Kate]

Oh, dude. Yes. And that's what I was trying to read. I was like, I want to see. I want to. And then it got me thinking. I want to hear a debate about is, are there any trad wives who are not religiously, like, you know, I.

[Tyler]

Would love to talk to him.

[Kate]

Yeah, I want one.

[Tyler]

That. Because.

[Kate]

Because the. The. The. The debate kept going on. I was like, they kept saying, I.

[Tyler]

Want to talk to them. That's not religious.

[Kate]

Yeah, I want to talk. All right.

[Tyler]

It'd be kind of interesting.

[Kate]

But they. What they. The whole point Was. They were pretty much saying that like the, the. The feminist movement was actually hurting women in general. I know, I'm. Well, you listen there is what.

[Tyler]

We can do what we want with our body and have tattoos and I can own a business and I can have my own bank account even if I am married. Like what?

[Kate]

I don't know. They're blaming certain.

[Tyler]

How is it ruining women, baby? You get misogynistic people in the. In upper places and people who, you know, like the Orange man and he takes. He's trying to take everything away from women. So it's like, make that make sense. Like, I don't understand. How does that benefit women?

[Kate]

I don't know. I don't know. It's got me really. It's like. And then like, I don't know, the, the kind of like the public like, this is amazing. We need to get back this old. Almost like celebrating the old.

[Tyler]

Do they wish that it was just like, like. Yeah, like America.

[Kate]

All right, well, here's. I thought it was funny because then I got me thinking about 1950s. Like, well, 1950s, we were taxing at 94% for corporate. Okay. I know everyone hates it. Like, that's when you could afford a house, a car, and maybe a little vacation house up north off a one person salary and the mom could stay home and be that whatever it was. It's because we were taxing the rich at 94. So do the math.

[Tyler]

It's not because of feminism.

[Kate]

It's because we had a different economic system right before Reagan, before all that, you know, trickle down crap. And then, you know, so listen, like, it just. I just thought it was interesting hearing them kind of explain their take. And I'm like, wow, this is. I can't. Like, this is a modern thing. They were young. They were probably like a couple years younger than us. And I'm like, whoa. See these young women, like, just like fighting against the other ones who are like, whoa, dude. Like, yo, you knew your grandma, right? Couldn't even get a credit card. Like, you know, weird.

[Tyler]

Like you're okay with that?

[Kate]

I don't know. It's so weird, man.

[Tyler]

That would be my thing. Like, and you're okay with that? Like you have to ask your husband for $50.

[Kate]

Yeah. You know, were like kind of like more extreme than others, I felt like. But.

[Tyler]

And there probably are. Yeah. So I mean, if you are a, A trad wife out there and you're listening to this, like, not.

[Kate]

It's not because you're like religiously affiliated, because that's why.

[Tyler]

No, hey, like I said, that brings you joy. Great. It would not bring me joy and I'm definitely not going to teach my daughters that way of life. But if More power to you, if that's what you like. But if you are a trad wife and like Ty said, not like super. I don't know, I would like to get a non biased.

[Kate]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

You know, trad wife in my DMs, like, let's talk. I think it'd be great to have a conversation and just ask.

[Kate]

Yeah. Because I am curious. It got me. Really. I was very curious. I'm like, wow, this is really interesting. Like what? Where are we at? Like, and I also feel like, you know, marriage rates down, birth, women are not having kids. Like, yeah, men are not having kids. Like we're, you know, it's a whole different kind of like ball game out there. Like.

[Tyler]

Well, yeah, because also people can't afford it to have kids.

[Kate]

You know, this is one of the first generations where we're actually like, like we're. Our parents were wealthier. Like we like we don't have anywhere close to what they had. And it's weird to even think about how.

[Tyler]

And that's sad because my mom and dad didn't have a lot.

[Kate]

I know, dude.

[Tyler]

You know, like that's crazy.

[Kate]

That's why I always, I always count our blessings all the time.

[Tyler]

Oh, always.

[Kate]

Every time I put gas in my car, actually it's really weird. I don't know if it'll ever leave my head.

[Tyler]

Yeah. You think of your mom, right?

[Kate]

I think of my mom. I go and I, and I. And I. I'm able to pump the gas and like just let it fill up.

[Tyler]

Mm.

[Kate]

Without. I mean I still consciously want. But, but, but like I just remember all the time my mom just being like $19. He had a dollar to buy a freaking stupid Coke or something, you know, so it's like really $19 right over it.

[Tyler]

Right.

[Kate]

Like. And I just think about it every single time. And I just feel so like always feel grateful. Gas in my car.

[Tyler]

Speaking.

[Kate]

Is that weird? There's one little thing.

[Tyler]

Oh no.

[Kate]

I think it's multiple things. But yeah, that's one.

[Tyler]

I think it makes you go back and. Yeah, I think. I think staying humble is the number one thing that people have and should do.

[Kate]

Like just remind yourself.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I was gonna say remind yourself where you came from and what it was.

[Kate]

Like, I'll pull on the house still and I'll slowly go down the driveway at Certain times, like, this is it. This is crazy, right? Like, you know.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Holy. Like, thank you so much. Every. All the time. Like, it's insane.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Like, my mom was never able to own a house.

[Kate]

Honestly, just be with my kids. Like, people think all the time, like, oh, well, you know, it's like, listen, I was able to spend every second and minute with them until up until.

[Tyler]

They had to start school.

[Kate]

Yeah, I'll be able to start school. Like, that's crazy. And I'll never get those years back. And I'm not. I don't regret. I don't get nothing.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Because you will never get them back.

[Kate]

I'll never get it back, so.

[Tyler]

And then we got little Miss Rya going to school this year.

[Kate]

I'm not okay with it.

[Tyler]

I know it's crazy, but it's like, talk about the trad wife stuff, too. I think it ties into this other. Into this other topic about, you know. Because I'm sure. I'm guessing that tread wives have to like asking permission from your spouse about things.

[Kate]

Yes. They. And that's what they. There's kind of like, they went back and forth a little bit, which got me thinking about asking permission, period.

[Tyler]

Right. I mean, I feel like you and I ask per. We don't, like, not. I wouldn't say permission.

[Kate]

It's. Yeah, we talk about things. I would never think if someone said, hey, man, this is what we're gonna do. Whatever. I'll be, oh, okay. Let me ask my wife if I can. I always go, oh, well, let me talk to my wife real quick and see what our plans are.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Because we don't know. Schedule plans. Yeah.

[Kate]

To even think of the word permission.

[Tyler]

Yeah. That doesn't sound right. Even when I was, like, coming out of my mouth.

[Kate]

Yeah, right, right. Hit apologize. It's like, no, there's no permissive things going between me. Permissive is such a. It's an inferior position at all times. And we're not. I don't ever want that to be happening.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

So I talk. We talk.

[Tyler]

I mean, I was gonna say, like.

[Kate]

We asked you if I can or can't.

[Tyler]

Yeah. We have conversations, but I've never asked, like, hey, can I. Oh, God.

[Kate]

It's like, what is that? Can I what?

[Tyler]

It's more or less like, hey, are you doing anything this weekend? I want to go here or do this with the kids or I'm, you know, going out with my friends or whatever.

[Kate]

You pretty much announce.

[Tyler]

True. Yeah.

[Kate]

I mean, I'm not asking you anything. You never Ask me anything.

[Tyler]

No announcing, hey, I mean, that's.

[Kate]

I want to do this. Does that mess with anything you got going on?

[Tyler]

Right. And if it does, and I'm moving it and I'm doing a different time.

[Kate]

You know, we talk about it. You talk.

[Tyler]

That's true. Because I'm even thinking about the time, too, when I bought my first. The first Maine Coon. And I didn't tell you for, like, three months.

[Kate]

Exactly. Right. I was like, you're going to get a Maine Coon cab. Like, all right, whatever, dude. Going to get a cat. I mean, whatever.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Now we have two.

[Kate]

Yeah. By the way.

[Tyler]

Yeah. But, like, that's convincing him to. I was like, come on, let's get a third.

[Kate]

Dude, she's crazy. Everyone tell her that she's nuts. But for real, like, I'm not. Like, I don't know. I just feel like the whole asking permission thing really bugs me.

[Tyler]

Yeah. We don't ask permission to, like, spend money. We don't ask permission to go places, do things.

[Kate]

I guess. What kind of partnership, true partnership is asking permission. The only time you have to ask permission in life at all is when you are in a position that's inferior to whoever you're asking.

[Tyler]

Right. Like, if you would ask your mom or dad.

[Kate]

Yeah. We made a pact. We will. We will. It's never one of those situations. If any one of us feel that way, then we have other problems to deal with.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Cause I'm, like, racking my brain. I'm like, I don't think there's ever been a time.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Think about it, you know, in our lives where we've asked permission.

[Kate]

Yeah. Even the word can I. It's always like, I was thinking of. I wanted to. You know what I say? I bought this right on this date. Like, whatever.

[Tyler]

Obviously, if things are, like, crazy super expensive, we talk about it and we're like, just, you know, does that make sense? Or should we do this? Or. You know what I mean? Which. I think that's normal.

[Kate]

Yeah. But honestly. And everything that's expensive is something to do with us. A camper, you know? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. New mattress, a piece of furniture we're all gonna sit on. So it's like, you know what I mean? Like, I mean, we just talk about it.

[Tyler]

Yeah. That would be weird.

[Kate]

Wouldn't it be weird thinking about it for a minute, like, being like, oh, well, let me.

[Tyler]

Can I. Hey, Tyler, can I. Sick. Can I go and, you know, pay 400 to get my hair done? No, honey, you can't. Okay. No, I'd be like, let me go.

[Kate]

Make my sourdough now.

[Tyler]

Right, Right. Oh, no. I tried hopping on that train. I still have a freaking bread maker suit in the COVID that I never even used.

[Kate]

Kate bought a freaking bread maker machine. Where?

[Tyler]

I bought one for my new stepmom, too.

[Kate]

You did?

[Tyler]

Yeah, all the time.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I bet she does it.

[Kate]

Listen, you guys. You dump it in there. You hit the button.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I know. I still never used it.

[Kate]

Don't touch it until it goes, whatever. And then this bread's there. There's no kneading. There's no rolling. There's no dough in there.

[Tyler]

So I bet you when Christine got that thing and used it for the first time, she was like, what is life?

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

A brand.

[Kate]

Make it. So what are we doing?

[Tyler]

I don't know. I guess I need. If I need a. My sister needs to teach me how to make a sourdough starter, because I guess that's the most important thing.

[Kate]

Oh, okay. Oh, well, I mean, that's on. You can do that online.

[Tyler]

Look it up, I guess.

[Kate]

Hey, Mary. Mary Gilbert, ask her for some starter.

[Tyler]

Oh, true. Yes. Doing that, too.

[Kate]

I forgot that they're. Trust me. Just go on.

[Tyler]

Everybody's doing it.

[Kate]

Go on your local Facebook group and be like, type in sourdough.

[Tyler]

We were in Florida in December because my dad got married, and my sister Amber came up to me, and she's like, oh, yeah, you know, like, I make sourdough and stuff. And she was like, showing pictures to tie and stuff, I guess, or whatever.

[Kate]

They put, like, little hearts. They put, like, flower.

[Tyler]

Yeah. She, like, cuts into them and stuff. And then all a sudden, she's like, hey, Kaylin, I have to show you pictures of my sourdough. And I just looked at her and I go, you would be a sourdough mom.

[Kate]

And so you would have pictures of sourdough on your phone.

[Tyler]

Tyler was like, dude, he was like, the way you said that, baby, you were just like. You would be a sourdough on. He's like, had me rolling. And my sister's like, well, they're not the prettiest. And she's showing me. And they have, like, cut into them in hearts, and she's got, like, chocolate and marshmallows on the. Like, please. You know, like, it's pretty as. Like, calm down.

[Kate]

No, I didn't know bread could be not pretty or pretty. I didn't know. I had no idea.

[Tyler]

I thought you just dumped ingredients in.

[Kate]

There, and then whatever pops out, pops out. Some of them Look a little better than others.

[Tyler]

But no, you gotta cut the designs in it before it cooks even.

[Kate]

Yeah. Because she had a little leaf, and I'm like, what the hell? Like, you went slash, slash, slash. It just puffed up like a leaf.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

I mean, I never put no leaf in no bread.

[Tyler]

No, but that. I'll tell you what, that chocolate s' mores one that she made look good as shit, dude. Yeah, it was like a chocolate s' more sourdough bread.

[Kate]

I'm down for that.

[Tyler]

And she's like, I know it's not the prettiest. I'm like, shut up.

[Kate]

It's got a flower on it, right?

[Tyler]

It's got chocolate and toasted marshmallows. Like, come on. Now it is cool. While I have a bread maker sitting in the car. And I've never even used it once.

[Kate]

Red maker. Guys convince her, send her some recipes. Like what?

[Tyler]

Just recipes are easy. It even comes with a recipe book. And I haven't even used it.

[Kate]

Just dump it. You dump the stuff in there.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I know. And I haven't even even.

[Kate]

Some sourdough chocolate s', mores, chocolate, whatever.

[Tyler]

Sourdough, dude. Yeah. I think like my stepmom and like my brother and stuff, they even made like a fruity pebble bread. Like, they put fruity pebbles in it. Like. Yeah, you can put all sorts of type of. In bread now.

[Kate]

I want some.

[Tyler]

That's what I mean. Like, my. My dad's new wife, so she's from the Philippines, so, like, she comes from, like, a place where they didn't even have, like, running water and stuff. And so she moved to America, and my dad was always posting her making bread videos, you know, and my dad's like, yeah, she's got me on a hunt for yeast all the time, trying to find yeast, you know, and so I just, like, randomly. I sent her like, a bread machine and stuff, and she was, like, floored. Especially, like, you know, it does everything for you. So it's. She ain't used to button. That's it. Yeah.

[Kate]

But I've always wished I was more like, I want to make stuff like croissants.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Then I'm trying to be like, £400.

[Kate]

Isn't that what we're supposed to do in our mid-30s?

[Tyler]

I don't know. I would love to eat brownies and cookies, cheese and cakes and too. I do like to bake, but it's then I want to. And thankfully, I'm not really, like, a sweets person, but you're not. I Would. No, I would want to eat it all I want. You know, I'm more of like a savory person. So. Yeah, bread would probably be a problem.

[Kate]

I mean, I want chocolate.

[Tyler]

I know.

[Kate]

I want chocolate swirled ice cream with caramel and chocolate chunks in the chocolate ice cream.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I can't. Sweets. No. No. But I can always tell when mother Nature's coming acting. Because I want donuts and chocolate and cake and cookies. I don't like sweets.

[Kate]

Really? She's in there. She's almost there.

[Tyler]

And man, every one of them donuts.

[Kate]

And Instacart, I'm like, yep, yep, yep, yep.

[Tyler]

It's coming. Chocolate ice cream. That's not like her. It's usually vanilla. Yeah. And I swear, each one of our kids, man, they got that sweet tooth gene from you.

[Kate]

I was bad as a kid. You don't understand a bad.

[Tyler]

Nova's bad. They're all actually all bad with sweets.

[Kate]

I wanted candy all the time. Time I was add, I was just wanted it. I just wanted everything. And then I figured out, remember when you were kids, you'd have like, you'd have like Mountain Dew parties.

[Tyler]

Yes.

[Kate]

Like, you know, you couldn't drink alcohol through like 8 years old slamming 2 liters of mountain Dew.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And acting all crazy.

[Kate]

Yeah. Never work for me. I go right to sleep.

[Tyler]

What?

[Kate]

Swear to God.

[Tyler]

Yeah, you definitely are hyperactive.

[Kate]

And I used to get kind of annoyed because I'm like, dude, I want to be wild and crazy too, but.

[Tyler]

It reminds me in the Mary like whenever. So I always went to my dad's like every other weekend and spent some time like in the summer. I know you know this story, but it's just something that lives in my mind. Like when I would go to my dad's house, you know, we weren't allowed to like, drink pop or like, you know, nothing like that. And then every. Yeah. And then every once in a while, my dad would give me and my sister Amber Mountain Dew. What do you think? Like, Mountain Dew. Like that should. Oh, it would get you hype as a kid.

[Kate]

I will. I never.

[Tyler]

Well, me.

[Kate]

Yeah, I know, I know. I watch all the kids.

[Tyler]

Yeah. But I'll never forget my dad used to watch this like, like show. It was like about like people in Africa or whatever. And it would be like these ladies with no tops on so their boobs are just hanging out and they got their kids on their hips. And me and Amber would just drink Mountain Dew and we would just laugh our asses off because it's just hanging around you know what I mean? But when you're like eight and you just drink, you know, smashed a whole two liter Mountain Dew, you know, we're just laughing and laughing and I'm like, what? My dad used to watch the weirdest.

[Kate]

Well, yeah, he still watches like big Barefoot or Finding Big. Yeah.

[Tyler]

Oh, my dad is like, he is a Bigfoot believer. Bigfoot exists. He's out there somewhere. Like, it was very like.

[Kate]

I know. I. Yeah, you know, he is definitely that guy.

[Tyler]

Yeah. But it's like just the most random. Like, like what kind of. What channel was that even?

[Kate]

Isn't that Geo, bro? Okay, about like, oh, yeah, the African titties all out. Yeah, now everyone knows that Geo.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it's. And I'm like, where was his wife at the time? Because she was like so strict. We, you know, we weren't allowed to drink pop and stuff. And like my dad and her would watch rated our movies sometimes on the weekend and we couldn't even come out of the bedroom or they were watching a radar movie. But then like African titties like, you know, and drink Mountain Dew. She, you know.

[Kate]

I don't know.

[Tyler]

Oh my God. My dad. Yeah, it was always like hunting shows and naked African ladies in Africa.

[Kate]

And my mom would always watch like intense stuff.

[Tyler]

See what she.

[Kate]

No, it's cringy.

[Tyler]

She's still like, I gotta watch Days of Our Lives. I'm like, ew, it's so boring.

[Kate]

I can't. No, I. Dude, I sat down there and that's like that.

[Tyler]

And then we got her hooked on Handmaid's too.

[Kate]

Oh, dude, my mom. Guys, if you watch Handmaid Sale, you know how wild it is. My mom, God fearing Christian woman. I was like, you need to watch that. And she is, she's in it. She texts me randomly. She's like, well, I can't. I just shouldn't spoil it for anyone.

[Tyler]

No, you can't spoil it. We haven't even watched the last season.

[Kate]

It was like this happened. Oh my God. I'm like, oh, you're in it now.

[Tyler]

But you remember the first couple seasons. She's like, this is too weird. I don't really like it. Right. And then I would mess with her because, you know, she what the different beliefs, political climate stuff.

[Kate]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

And I would mess with her and I would be like, Like I said, it's not far fetched, Mom. It's, it's. It can happen. You know, she's like, oh, whatever. I'd be like, under his eye, you know, Shut up. I'M just randomly random. She truly. Oh, praise be.

[Kate]

You know, pleasant with the fruit.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And she was just like, oh, my God, knock it off. I'm just saying it's half. It's coming.

[Kate]

Well, hey, when that. When that. All that stuff happened, I did. I did tell her about it. I said, you know, this woman is being held in for this baby.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Like, that's so, so up.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And it literally. It was like a scene out of the hand.

[Kate]

Literally. I'm like, this.

[Tyler]

Gets scary.

[Kate]

It's disgusting.

[Tyler]

And then you have people that are like, feminists. Like, what?

[Kate]

I know.

[Tyler]

That's kind of where I'm like, make it make sense.

[Kate]

No, I know. And I sense this weird division shift thing going on where I thought for a while, I thought everyone was going to this, you know, progressively get into the same thing. We're all kind of generally moving this way.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

And I just feel the locomotives stop and just reverse and slow going back. Like, it's weird. It's like. And then there's this huge divide of, like, what was so great back then.

[Tyler]

You know, I don't know. And I think people need to not be so divided about, like, political views and everything. I think it should simply come down to, like, humans and human rights and what is fair and not fair and what is equal. Not equal. Not about anybody having more power than anybody else.

[Kate]

Not even about political party.

[Tyler]

No, not at all.

[Kate]

It's just about, like, I. Because I'm not biased or. Or, you know, I'm not like, sold on one or the other. It's just what they speak about, what they stand for, what I'm listening to, what I see, what they're voting on. I mean, that's just. That's it.

[Tyler]

Well, like, you and I said, like, we don't vote for.

[Kate]

I don't.

[Tyler]

The certain side. Every time it's based off of which person fits my morals and values more.

[Kate]

I mean, I don't know. And then doing research, like, I feel like. Yeah, they speak one thing a lot of people don't. And then no one watches the. It's a public tv. It'll show you yay or nay. How many people voted on this bill?

[Tyler]

That bill and rebuild online record.

[Kate]

Yeah, read that. I know it's. It's annoying. A lot of skimming, a lot of googling. What the hell does that word mean? And then it may take you back to other things. Yeah, it's a little bit.

[Tyler]

You should be educated about and true education on what you're, you know, leaning.

[Kate]

Towards because People can say and talk certain things. I'm. I'm really believing what's. What's on the piece of paper and what you're checking yes or no on.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

You know, I mean, that's it. I mean, I don't. That's it. That's all. I. I don't know what else.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Because actions speak louder than words.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

You could lie until you're blue in the face and then not do anything.

[Kate]

And then even bills, all bill names sound good. Then you read the details and a little different than what you thought. So you just gotta just. I mean it's. It takes time and it's a little bit work, but just don't be lazy about it, you know? I guess that's what I like, don't be lazy about it.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And. And don't take like what they're. Take what. What they're saying with a grain of salt. And like you said, then you do the, the investigation to see if it's true or not true. You know, what are they voting on? Yeah. Or what have they have done and during their whole careers.

[Kate]

I think whatever. And it's all on record what they said yay or nay to. On all the bills. Read the bills. What stands do you like? You know what I mean?

[Tyler]

Right. Agree with. You can see.

[Kate]

You can see. They don't even have to speak. They don't have to campaign. Be silent.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

And I'll. I'll know who you are about what you're voting on certain bills for.

[Tyler]

Well, that's because you put the effort in to getting the knowledge. You know. Yeah.

[Kate]

I'm not, I'm not sitting there reading the whole. I'm. I'm. But there's a lot of skimming. It's a pain in the ass. Anyone who does. Who does it and goes on the website and reads a bill. It's. It's a. It's not. Not all of it's horrible. Some. Some bills are actually really simple, but some of them are just the whole. God. God. It's work. But I feel like, you know, you have to do that.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Don't you wish you. It's like, oh gosh. The days when you didn't have to worry about that, you know, whatever. Huh.

[Kate]

I know.

[Tyler]

Adulting sucks.

[Kate]

It does. I think it's so cool. And it's not.

[Tyler]

It sucks. And we had adults our whole lives telling us.

[Kate]

I know.

[Tyler]

Don't. You don't want to. No. You don't. Isn't that so funny?

[Kate]

So stupid.

[Tyler]

And then you get to, like, their age when they were telling us those things. And now here I tell it to your niece and our kids all the time too. And I'm like, they ain't listening.

[Kate]

No, they ain't listening.

[Tyler]

No. They're like, you're. You're done.

[Kate]

I think. Cuz you're. You're. You're just so set on freedom and you believe that freedom is gonna. That's the end all. Be. All that. That is the ticket to happiness is freedom. But freedom, it just comes with so much responsibility that it's almost like this. Freedom is annoying, you know, because it's like.

[Tyler]

Like one of my pet peeves is I'm sick of thinking about what I have to cook for dinner for the rest of my life. When you're a kid, it was just Mom's like, this is what we're having, you know? And sometimes I always hated it. Sometimes I cried. I'm like, not again, helper. Yeah. And that's one thing. I'm just like, bro, for the rest of my life, I have to worry about what I'm gonna eat for dinner.

[Kate]

Yeah, but imagine if you were like. You know what I mean? Like those Iron Chef people, which is like. You know what I mean?

[Tyler]

Sure.

[Kate]

No, I know, but like, oh, mix the brandy with the French wine, not salt and the acid and the sugar. You know how they know of a combination? It's really chemistry.

[Tyler]

Well, then it sucks, because when you have children, too, like, we're in the. You know, the depths of it right now, and you try to make something new and, like, tasty, and the kids look, ew, I don't like it. Or they try. They don't like it. I'm like, dude, this is so good. What are you talking about?

[Kate]

Let me tell you now, the rage you feel when you spend an hour cooking this new meal that you don't even know if you're gonna like or not sounds kind of good. You take a risk, you roll the dice, and it just.

[Tyler]

And it's good to us.

[Kate]

And you're eating it by yourself while you're still. Still making the kids something else. Because they don't do it. So annoying.

[Tyler]

Well, when it gets to that point, it's like, fine. Then I'm frying up a couple hot dogs, macaroni and cheese. Because this. This shit's good. I'll eat it.

[Kate]

Hot dog, Mac. There you go.

[Tyler]

Right? I've never done that.

[Kate]

I used to when I was a kid. You never did that.

[Tyler]

Hot dogs in your macaroni and Cheese?

[Kate]

Yeah, you. Come on on.

[Tyler]

No.

[Kate]

Are you kidding?

[Tyler]

Maybe like once or twice. Come on, that just sounds really gross right now.

[Kate]

I know other kids did this. You combined just a little bit of meat with the carbs. You know what I mean?

[Tyler]

When you're a kid, never cared about meat and carbs.

[Kate]

I'm just saying it's a full on meal. When you're poor, you chop the hot dogs. You know, you got some extras in the, in the fridge somewhere. Throw them in the Mac.

[Tyler]

Do you remember that meal that your mom used to make because you were poor?

[Kate]

The sausage, potato, green bean.

[Tyler]

Yeah, Sausage, potatoes and green beans. Well, yeah, well, besides sausage.

[Kate]

True.

[Tyler]

But I saw. There was actually a recipe that I saw today on Tick Tock. But she used like all fresh ingredients for that and like did. Added like some like beef. My God.

[Kate]

What?

[Tyler]

It's called like beef stock in it and put it in this crock pot and. Dude, that actually looked so good.

[Kate]

Yeah, it's good.

[Tyler]

I was like, damn, that sounds yummy.

[Kate]

I haven't had that in a while.

[Tyler]

I might have to make a poor man's dinner.

[Kate]

Yep. Yeah, sounds about good.

[Tyler]

It does.

[Kate]

I. So. Dude, I. I'm bad. I'll eat ramen noodles, though.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I know. Well, the one time I had a craving for it a few weeks ago, remember? Because you were like, why'd you order ramen? I was like, I had a craving for it. I ate it and it was gross.

[Kate]

It was.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I did not like it.

[Kate]

What happened to you? You've officially moved on. You're a grown up.

[Tyler]

I didn't like it. What? When are you gonna grow up?

[Kate]

I'm.

[Tyler]

I.

[Kate]

Help me. Help me. I don't know what's wrong with me. I can't. What am I supposed to do?

[Tyler]

Tyler's like, yeah, cereal. Yeah, yeah. Cheese dip that I just make and throw things in a pot and concoction and dip chips in.

[Kate]

Yeah, that's what I do. Yeah, I'm a concoctor.

[Tyler]

Your dad's the same way.

[Kate]

We'll just go on the leftovers. Whatever's in there, you know what is? Okay, cool. You got some extra meat, some spaghetti. We'll just chop up and make some sausage spaghetti. I don't know, whatever it is.

[Tyler]

That is so funny. Especially because, like, you were never raised with your dad and he does the same shit.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Because, I mean, I probably lived with him longer than you. What?

[Kate]

That is diabolical. Holy shit. I've never thought. You have.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

You have lived with my dad that up More than I ever have under the same roof.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Eating meals together.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Kate]

That's insane, right? You did.

[Tyler]

And he would concoct some and I'd be like, that's definitely some good ass.

[Kate]

Spanish rice he does.

[Tyler]

But some of the. I'm like, that's definitely a prison meal, bro. You're not behind the cells anymore. We don't need to crush up Doritos to make a cross. I'm just kidding. He never did that. But. Yeah, just the whole, like throwing random in it. It. Yeah. But isn't that weird?

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I lived with your dad.

[Kate]

Yeah, you did.

[Tyler]

Probably longer than you ever have in your whole life.

[Kate]

Living in life.

[Tyler]

Yeah. But I was constantly running from there.

[Kate]

Too true.

[Tyler]

Like, give me the out of here. That time in life, I was like, give me the out of here.

[Kate]

We're driving that stupid van around, dude, the hoop.

[Tyler]

Getting dropped out to school was the most embarrassing thing ever. And going to the ob GYN in that thing. And then also think about having a whole television crew following you too, on top of that. That.

[Kate]

Oh, yeah, that's right.

[Tyler]

Embarrassing as.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Especially when you're like a teenager. And he would, like, start it with a screwdriver.

[Kate]

Yep. Screwdriver.

[Tyler]

One time me and my friend. My friend came from Florida to visit me and we drove the hoop.

[Kate]

It was all out. Yeah. Be careful.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Hoopty van stalled out. Oh, my God.

[Kate]

Yeah. If you didn't keep that throttle, like, it would. Yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

I remember he would just like throw in the back, like, and it would break.

[Kate]

Yeah, yeah. He throw bottles.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Cuz he was drinking and driving up, bro.

[Kate]

Just.

[Tyler]

You think about that time and it's like, everybody's like, sure, just go with Butch. It's like, all right, sure.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

We're in the glass bottles in the back seat.

[Kate]

You'd hear it crash in the back behind you. Like, that's real safe off the metal of the. Of the van.

[Tyler]

And that was just our normal.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Like, what the. Never in a million years would I be like, sure, honey, go in Tim's car.

[Kate]

Yeah. He's chucking bottles.

[Tyler]

Like, what the. The starting it with a screwdriver, which is also illegal.

[Kate]

I didn't even know that.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I only know that because of cops.

[Kate]

I never knew that.

[Tyler]

And also, he never had a license.

[Kate]

No, of course. So driving was. Of course he didn't care. He's like, I don't care. Like, screwdriver's illegal. Drinking and driving's illegal. And guess what? Even just driving's illegal for you license that's crazy.

[Tyler]

He eventually got his license when he was 55. I'm just kidding. I don't know how old he was, but know that was crazy. It was nuts. Good old was. No, never mind. Not good crazy. Chaotic days of times.

[Kate]

Of times. It was.

[Tyler]

There's some parts or I'm like, I would love to go back to. And then other parts, I'm like, no.

[Kate]

I think I like to go back to just like. Like you said, like, just, like, not have any adult worries. There was no worrying about what I didn't make for dinner. There's no. None of that. Like, there was nothing.

[Tyler]

Nothing. Yeah, but. Yeah, just the periods of, like, chaos. I'm like, no, thank you.

[Kate]

It was stressful.

[Tyler]

I've had to do a lot of mental health healing from a lot of that. I'm like, I don't want to go back to some of that. Never again.

[Kate]

Really?

[Tyler]

Yeah. I never want to go to that ever again. That's a topic for a whole nother episode. But no, okay, but I'm not serious. Like, anybody that's listening, you know, if you are a trad wife, that's not biased, please reach out to the Kate bias.

[Kate]

I just don't want, like, I don't want any. I'm looking for a tragic. That's not religiously motivated. That's really what I guess I would say. Just because you're doing it. Because. And also, like, I like, how do you compare the trad wife to a feminist movement? And why do you think the feminist movement is so bad?

[Tyler]

If there's any tradwifes listening, I feel like that would be a really good conversation to have on a podcast just to, you know, I don't know, just pick your brain. I want to know why you live the way you live, what you know, what brings you joy out of it. Yeah. So you can definitely DM the Kate and Ty break it down pages. So it's Kate and Ty break it down on Instagram and tick tock, send a DM there. Because I would really. That would be interesting.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Especially if you don't mind, like, sharing your story and, you know, know it being recorded and all of those sweating things. Other than that, I mean, got anything else to say?

[Kate]

I'm just kind of wanting to know what's going on with the whole society movement here. Going.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it's definitely intriguing.

[Kate]

I'm that, like, this whole week is all I've been thinking about, like, what is going on?

[Tyler]

All I know is it's a no. It's a no for me.

[Kate]

I was concerned.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it's crazy. And plus, I. Yeah, right.

[Kate]

I raised my daughters totally different saying would just. I thought about even just reading that.

[Tyler]

I was like. But anyways, please reach out and we will be talking to you guys next week. Bye. Bye.

[Kate]

Just when you thought summer couldn't get any hotter, Pluto TV is turning up the heat with thousands of of free movies presenting Summer of Cinema. Stream your favorite blockbuster films like Gladiator. I will have my vineyards. Good burger.

[Tyler]

This is what I do.

[Kate]

Fast food, Beverly Hills Cop, the Girl with a Dragon Tattoo, and Julie and Julia.

[Tyler]

Bon appetit.

[Kate]

All for free on your favorite devices. Pluto tv Stream now pay Never.

[C]

If you're a podcast host, listen up. This one's for you. My name is Allie Jackson. I'm the host of Finding Mr. Height, a dating and relationship podcast that I've been doing for four years now, sharing my positive and practical approach to dating that's built on my own life experience. And I wanted to share another experience that I've had, my secret behind monetizing my show. It's called Red Circle. And I was just telling my colleague about how much I love their platform. With Red Circle, not only am I getting a seamless hosting experience, but I also love the support I receive in ad sales. It's not just typical ad sales either. It's targeted opportunities based on my show and my life. And the platform is super simple. You just set your preferences and Red Circle matches you with sponsors that align with your show.

[Tyler]

Go.

[C]

You can vet every opportunity, and their platform gives you great analytics. More recently, too, my Redcircle team has brought me opportunities outside of my podcast on social media to really augment the podcast partnerships. Bring them full circle. I just can't recommend them enough. If you want to give it a try, go to redcircle.com to get your free trial. That's redcircle.com for a free trial.