Podcast Summary: Cate & Ty Break It Down
Episode: Sold, Not Relinquished: An Adoptee's Search for Answers
Release Date: August 6, 2025
Guest: Diana, an adoptee sharing her personal journey
Introduction
In the emotionally charged episode titled "Sold, Not Relinquished: An Adoptee's Search for Answers," hosts Tyler and Catelynn Baltierra delve deep into the complexities of adoption with their special guest, Diana. Diana offers a raw and unfiltered account of her adoption story, shedding light on the less-discussed aspects of adoption, including the financial transactions involved and the long-term emotional ramifications.
Diana’s Adoption Story
Diana begins by introducing herself and providing a glimpse into her early life.
Diana [00:27]: "I’m Diana and I’m from Chicago. I was born in Wisconsin to a lady who... she put us up for adoption to protect us from the mob and all of these crazy stories."
She reveals that her biological mother kept Diana and her three brothers for varying periods before relinquishing them.
Diana [04:25]: "I was kept for two months. That’s what she liked to do... She never really said why."
The adoption was facilitated through an attorney associated with the Hater Foundation, which operated more as a backdoor adoption agency. Diana uncovers that her mother was essentially selling her children for financial gain.
Diana [05:28]: "She had an attorney, and there was this back door, like, South Side Adoption Agency... signing the papers and saying it was fine."
Financial Aspects and Ethical Concerns
Diana exposes the transactional nature of her adoption, highlighting the monetary exchange involved.
Diana [06:18]: "My birth mom had a thing for Jewish women because she knows that Jewish people take care of their kids... she only gave her kids to Jewish people."
Ty reflects on the shock of realizing that the adoption involved selling babies, challenging the often idealized portrayal of adoption as purely selfless.
Ty [06:45]: "A lot of times in the adoption world, we see the beautiful picture that people like to paint of it... but yours is really, that's what it is."
Reconnecting with Biological Relatives
Diana shares her journey of finding her biological brother, Michael, after years of believing he was fictional.
Diana [02:44]: "We found each other from Ancestry like a year ago. And he's pretty cool. I've looked for him pretty much my entire life and had decided he was fake."
She emphasizes the importance of reunions for adoptees, regardless of the outcome.
Ty [08:09]: "Adoptees deserve to have that closure or that kind of reunion is vital to the adoptee."
Relationship with Adoptive Parents
Growing up, Diana describes a strained relationship with her adoptive parents, feeling disconnected and misunderstood.
Diana [23:05]: "Growing up? It was very strained. I told therapists that I wasn't able to connect with them..."
However, she acknowledges improvements over time, despite ongoing challenges.
Diana [23:05]: "Now it's like, it's okay for the most part, but we have our stuff."
Discovering the Truth About Her Biological Mother
One of the most gripping parts of Diana’s story is her discovery of her biological mother’s involvement with the mafia and her mental health struggles.
Diana [35:01]: "She was born the youngest of 10 children... she was in witness protection and then ran away... she ended up not showing up for her court date."
Diana recounts meeting her biological mother briefly, observing signs of her mental instability and substance abuse.
Diana [45:36]: "My mom tries to control things that I do and say... I just put her on restricted because I'm gonna post whatever I want."
Emotional Impact and Identity Struggles
The revelation that Diana was sold for financial reasons deeply affects her sense of self-worth and identity.
Diana [52:39]: "I was pissed last week. I was having a rough time... I was like, cool. So I was like, born for no reason. I don't like that."
Despite these feelings, Diana finds solace in her relationship with her biological father, who leads a simple, stable life far removed from the chaos of her biological mother.
Diana [53:57]: "My dad is a very cool guy... He likes to hear about my sons and how we have stuff in common."
Parenting as an Adoptee
Becoming a mother herself, Diana reflects on how her adoption journey influences her parenting style. She strives to connect deeply with her children, nurturing them without imposing the same struggles she faced.
Diana [54:46]: "I feel like I really have a very deep connection with my kids... like, why they might be acting this way."
Advocacy and Healing
Diana expresses a strong desire to advocate for other adoptees, emphasizing the need for open conversations about adoption’s complexities.
Diana [60:11]: "I'm trying to do more stuff like this and talk about it more and be a voice... a lot of adults in my age group that are adopted have a lot of social, emotional issues."
Ty and Kate commend Diana for her vulnerability and the importance of sharing diverse adoption stories to foster understanding and empathy.
Ty [61:26]: "The more we keep shedding light on all these nuances and different stories, the more people learn."
Conclusion
The episode concludes with heartfelt thanks to Diana for sharing her harrowing yet inspiring story. Tyler and Catelynn emphasize the importance of recognizing and addressing the varied experiences of adoptees, advocating for transparency, support, and healing within the adoption community.
Notable Quotes
- Diana [00:27]: "I was born in Wisconsin to a lady who... she put us up for adoption to protect us from the mob."
- Ty [06:45]: "A lot of times in the adoption world, we see the beautiful picture... but yours is really, that's what it is."
- Ty [08:09]: "Adoptees deserve to have that closure or that kind of reunion is vital to the adoptee."
- Diana [52:39]: "I was like, born for no reason. I don't like that."
- Ty [61:26]: "The more we keep shedding light on all these nuances and different stories, the more people learn."
Final Thoughts
"Sold, Not Relinquished: An Adoptee's Search for Answers" is a compelling episode that brings to light the intricate and often painful realities of adoption. Diana's story serves as a poignant reminder of the importance of honesty, support, and open dialogue in the adoption process. Through her narrative, listeners gain a deeper understanding of the emotional and ethical dimensions that surround adoption, underscoring the necessity for empathy and comprehensive support systems for adoptees.