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Meeting Us Where We Are At

After Jesus had revealed himself to his disciples and eaten breakfast with them, he said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?” Simon Peter answered him, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my lambs.” He then said to Simon Peter a second time…” John 21:15–16

Today’s resurrection appearance is the third time Jesus appeared to His disciples, as recorded in John’s Gospel. It took place while seven of the Apostles were fishing. Following a miraculous catch of fish, they recognized Jesus on the shore. After they went to Him, Jesus cooked breakfast and asked Peter three times if he loved Him.

The first time Jesus asked Peter if he loved Him, Jesus used the verb agapáō (from the noun agápē), but Peter responded with the verb philéō: “‘Simon, son of John, do you agapáō Me more than these?’” Simon Peter answered Him, “‘Yes, Lord, You know that I philéō You.’” The word agapáō refers to a deeper form of love—a self-sacrificial, total commitment that reflects the love of God for humanity. It involves a love that is not just affection but is marked by a willingness to sacrifice for the good of the other, the kind of love exemplified by Jesus Himself. Peter’s use of the word philéō, on the other hand, refers to a more affectionate, friendly love, often associated with a deeper, more humanly focused bond of friendship. While sincere, it is less intense and self-sacrificial than agápē love.

The second time Jesus asks the question, He again uses agapáō, and Peter again responds with philéō. The third time, Jesus shifts His question to match Peter’s response, using philéō: “Simon, son of John, do you philéō Me?” Peter responds again with philéō: “Lord, You know everything; You know that I philéō You.”

This shift to philéō in the third question shows that Jesus meets Peter where he is, acknowledging Peter’s limitations and his current ability to love with a more affectionate, rather than sacrificial, love. This exchange also highlights Peter’s awareness of his weakness and his humility in acknowledging that he cannot yet love with the full depth of agápē to which Jesus is calling him.

At the end of the conversation, Jesus states: “Amen, amen, I say to you, when you were younger, you used to dress yourself and go where you wanted; but when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go” (John 21:18). Jesus was not only prophesying that Peter would die as a martyr, but also that through his martyrdom, Peter’s death would glorify God, as it would be the ultimate expression of the sacrificial agápē love to which Jesus had called him. This promise to Peter would have given him hope for the future, even as he faced the challenge of his calling.

Despite Peter’s weakness and inability to express agápē, Jesus not only meets Peter where he is but also gives him a threefold mission of divine importance. He says, “Feed My lambs…tend My sheep…feed My sheep.” While these commands might seem similar, they differ in their emphasis. To “feed My lambs” implies Peter’s mission to care for those who are weak in faith and in need of the initial nourishment of the Word of God. To “tend My sheep” means to shepherd and guide the mature Christians. To “feed My sheep” emphasizes the need for those mature in their faith to receive nourishment through a deeper understanding of the Word of God and the gift of the Eucharist, the Bread of Life. Though Peter was imperfect, struggling with guilt and discouragement over his inability to express the depth of love Jesus was asking of him, Jesus still entrusted him with a divinely inspired mission.

Reflect today on God’s invitation to you to love Him and fulfill His mission. Though we are each imperfect and fail in many ways, Jesus continuously asks us for agápē love. Though we struggle to live that depth of love, God, in His mercy, does not wait until we are perfect to send us forth to be His instruments. He wants us to nourish those with little to no faith, strengthen and encourage our brothers and sisters who are stronger in faith, and nourish them by becoming instruments of His pure love. The extent to which we embrace agápē is the extent to which we will be able to fulfill that mission well. But we start today by responding the best we can because Jesus meets us and uses us where we are, while calling us higher.

Most loving Lord, Your love for me is perfect, yet mine is imperfect. Please give me hope and draw me ever closer each day to the pure agápē love to which I am called. As I grow in this love, please use me as I am to fulfill the mission You have entrusted to me. Jesus, I trust in You.

Image: Christ's Charge to Peter by Raphael

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