In one of my Notes, I posted on the question of “Why do Catholics leave the Church?” as a response to this post on social media,

Unlike this guy above who is posting his anecdotal evidence, I will be looking at actual studies and surveys as to why Catholics have left the Church.

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Here is the first survey we will examine:

Lots of details there, but I will focus on a few key facts.

Firstly, the trend of Catholics leaving the Church peaked for those born around 1950 to 1970. This was a period of social upheaval. I believe that Mass attendance was already declining in the 1950s, and in the 1960s there was the Vatican II changes and the aftermath, which also caused more disharmony. Those who were teenagers in the 1960s and 1970s when their parents stopped attending regular weekly Mass — those are the main ones who “fell away.”

It’s no surprise. Family support is crucial. People blame “poor Catechesis” and I’m sure that was true, but without proper family support, even a good religious education program will have its limits.

“Seventy-four percent of respondents who stopped going to Mass for a year or more did so during their teens or 20s.”

Young people saw the incongruity — they saw that joining this religion didn’t make much of a difference in their parents, so they asked themselves, “Why bother?”

If your religion doesn’t dramatically change you, then what is the point?

Secondly, developing a good habit in a teenager won’t automatically make them keep that habit when they are out of the house. Consider these responses —

The most common reason, cited by 20% of people raised Catholic who stopped attending Mass for a year or more, was: “I moved away from the church I had been attending.”

The second-most common response is more theological: “I did not feel that attending church mattered.”

The next two most frequent reasons for ceasing to attend Mass for a time are practical: “I moved away from my family” or “I had a change in circumstances that made it harder to attend.”

Additional theological and moral reasons for ceasing to go to Mass were less frequently cited.

A teenager might attend Mass and church events because it feels good to be part of a family or community event, but once they leave that environment, it is difficult to replicate and sustain that in another location. Especially because few parishes have active young adult ministries. Most parishes focus on youth group activities and the rest of the ministries are dominated by little old ladies.

And when they’ve already received the basic message of what it means to be a nice, moral person, they really don’t see any further benefit from weekly Mass attendance. How many times do we have to hear “We should be nice to each other, like Jesus and Mary” before we tune it out?

Yes, I understand that the Holy Mass is primarily for giving God his due worship, and the lessons about life from the homily are secondary, but that doesn’t mean we should ignore the impact that the homily can have. The homily must be something that makes a difference in our lives, otherwise people will not stay long enough to begin to understand the depth of the value of the worship.

There is a lot more to this survey that I won’t get into right now. These results don’t cover every situation. It doesn’t tell us how many converted to a non-Catholic denomination because “they started reading the Bible.” But we can draw some inferences on that angle.

Lots of teenagers in Catholic youth programs are “on fire” with their faith and inspired by youth retreats and other events. But that feeling is fleeting. Real spiritual growth is an arduous journey, and real relationship with God is found in stillness, not in rambunctious praise & worship songs. Teens are leaving the safe harbor of their local parish and venturing into high seas with the wrong expectations, such that when they encounter doldrums and dryness, or storms and waves, they think they must be doing the wrong religion.

In reality, God & His angels are right there with us, in every moment, wet or dry, in good times and bad, no matter what our feelings tell us at the moment.

It is our false expectations that get us in trouble.

The one, true religion is not an everlasting spiritual rollercoaster of excitement. It is not a Christian rock concert.

It is often a trip through the desert alone. Prepare yourself accordingly.

The farther you go on your spiritual journey, the more you will encounter spiritual dryness, when God removes the spiritual consolations He has been sending you and you rely only on your love of God to sustain your hope, joy and peace.

This is especially true for husbands and fathers. When you are doing things correctly, you will often feel isolated, alone, like no one appreciates the burden you are shielding them from. Learn to rejoice in that burden. The glory is not for you, anyway.

That is why we say,

Non nobis, Domine, non nobis. Sed nomine tuo da gloriam.

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