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Avery Woods
Hi, welcome to Cheers. I'm your host, Avery Woods. Hi, guys. Welcome back to the Cheers podcast. I'm your host, Avery woods, and we have a fun little solo episode today. I asked on my Instagram stories some saucy questions from you guys, Confessions, all the things. So we're gonna get into it. You guys love when we do this. And if you haven't been here or you're new here, back in the day on my Instagram, I used to do a segment called Saucy Saturdays where I would have a question box. This is something I did for, like, three years. And you guys would send in all of the unfiltered questions, usually about sex. And I answer them. And I really have no shame in that. I don't know why it's such a taboo thing, but I love how much it helps other women and men even understanding their women or the relationships better. And I just think it's something that's very empowering for women that we should be more open and vulnerable to talk about. So we're getting into that today. There's a couple other things I want to touch on first, and one of those things is this is the last time we're going to be recording with this studio setup. So we are completely redoing the studio. I'm so excited. We have a lot of upcoming, exciting things for Cheers. We have been talking to some big production companies and I'm hoping it works out where, you know, we can kind of get under their belt. Because something I'm really proud of is that Cheers has been a completely solo endeavor. It's literally just been Scott and I, and to be able to build it up to what it's at now is crazy to me and something I never expected to happen. I genuinely get so much joy out of doing this podcast because it feels easy. It's a no judgment zone. People listen just because they want to be here. And I'm so grateful for that. And in the beginning, you know, it was just Scott and I's best friends, and he's like, oh, I've, you know, been interested in production. So the fact that we're here now and we're ranked so high amongst, like, huge podcast companies that are either Spotify exclusive or under these huge production companies. And it's literally just a two man show for us. Us, we do all our own bookings, we bought all of our own equipment. Like, we did all the research ourselves. So it's just such a special sacred thing to us. And we've had some offers from other production companies, but they unfortunately do require you to sign over pretty much all the rights of the podcast. And that's something Scott and I just are not willing to do because we've worked so hard for it, and we're not just going to give that up because it is so important for me. So, yeah, we are hoping those meetings go well. Fingers crossed. And if not, it doesn't work out, then that's fine. Scott and I are doing just great on our own, honestly. So slay for us, Scotty. But I just wanted a different vibe in the podcast room, and we had kind of played around with the chairs, and then I ended up moving the chairs into my living room because I liked them better in my house. And if you don't know, our podcast studio is actually attached to my house. We have, like, a little casita situation. So we changed our guest house kind of area into the podcast studio because it's just easier. I don't want to have to rent something out. And I love being close to home because obviously we have a family and kids, so we. Scott actually sent me this Tick Tock, and it was this girl. I forget her name, but I'll. I'll find it and tag her on my Instagram or something. But she bought these wood panels from Amazon and she put them on her wall behind her bed with a neon sign. And I was just obsessed with how it looked. And Scott sent it to me. He's like, this would be so sick for the podcast studio because I really want it to be, like, homey, modern, contemporary, just kind of go with anything I'm wearing, my guests are wearing and just look great on the eye and kind of, like, simplify things. So if you follow me on Tick Tock, you probably saw when we bought the new podcast chairs, I found them at the anthropology outlet for Dirt Cheap. Because if you shop at Anthropology for furniture, you know how damn expensive it is. And we're lucky we have an outlet right by our house. So I found these, like, gorgeous light pink velvet chairs. I think it's perfect to match the studio vibes because obviously the Cheers logo is pink. And then we're gonna do that little, like, wood wall behind us with the neon sign. And I got a cute little side table with, like, some decorations I want to decorate for fall in here and just kind of, you know, for Christmas, get some Christmas trees and just go with the holiday vibes, because I think it's so warm and cozy and I love it. And I was telling Scott, like, why not? It's My fucking podcast. Like, I can decorate however I want. I don't know why I feel so much pressure from, like, outside sources or to kind of conform to what everyone else is doing in order to be liked or for these companies to believe in us. But all that matters is that we believe in us. And I'm just so grateful for where we are now. And we have some really exciting guests next week that we're getting on and in the future. So we're excited. We have a lot. We have a lot coming up that we're really, really grateful for, because October is one year that we've done Cheers, which is crazy to me. That's next month. What we've accomplished in a year, I'm so, so proud of, and it's all because of you guys. So we're just so grateful that you're here. Thank you so much. The other thing I want to talk about before we got into our saucy questions is my alcohol sobriety journey. And I'm going on two months without a sip of alcohol, which is crazy to me. I never thought that that would happen, and I feel so amazing. I actually. There's rumors. There's rumors that I'm on Semi Glue Tied. And honestly, thank you. Like, I'm so grateful for that. Like, spread rumors that I'm on Semi Glue tied, Ozempic, whatever the case may be. Because if you think that that means I'm doing something right, you know what? I will be so honest with you. When we were in Hawaii for the month of June, I did three doses of semi glutide, and David threw it in the trash because I was so deathly ill. And I. I was obviously still drinking then, and so I kept a lot of weight on. Especially, like, just puffiness. Just people know what I'm talking about. Like, it's a different type of weight when it's alcohol weight, because you're just swollen and I don't know, I just feel gross. Like, my face gets really puffy, and it's hard for me to lose that stubborn weight. And in my head, back in June, I was like, I'm not drink. Like, I'm not going to stop drinking. So I knew we were going to Hawaii for a month, and I knew I wasn't gonna be able to work out a lot, so I was like, maybe I'll just try, like, a low dose of it. It was awful, and I will never do it again. I was popping Zofran like it was Smarties. And Scott can attest I was so sick and he's been open about his journey, kind of experimenting with. Was it semi Glue said or was MPIC that you were on? Both. Yeah. Scott's tried both. I was like, maybe I'll try it. I can't. I get so sick. And I'll be honest with you guys, like, I don't believe in dieting. I will never diet. I would say if I ever had something big coming up where I'm like, my body is vulnerable, then maybe I would work with, like, a nutritionist or maybe, like, food prep. But food makes me happy. And I've had issues in the past when it comes to binging and purging, and I feel like when I force myself to not eat certain things or just not eat it. And, like, my thing is moderation. Like, for example, we're at Ashley and Jesse's house last night for the UFC fight, and we ordered a dozen crumble cookies, and I tried a little slice of all the flavors. And, like, what is that going to do? Kill me? No, I just. It's about having the correct mindset when it comes to food. And so I feel like I've gotten a great routine since not drinking. I have been mixing Pilates with lifting. So Monday, Wednesday, Friday I do Pilates, and then Tuesday, Thursday I lift with David at the gym. On Tuesday, we do back and biceps, and then Thursday we do legs. And I feel like it's the best shape I've ever been in my life. Like, even David the other day was like, we've been together for 10 years, and this is the best shape you've ever been in your life after two kids and you're turning 30 this year. And I was like, wow, you're. You're right. Like, it's. And it's such a healthy balance because I don't diet. Like I said, I'm not doing any sort of, like, weight loss shot. Whatever the people are saying, which let them talk, whatever. I'm like, thank you. Thank you. It's not semi glue tied. I just have been working really hard in the gym. But isn't it sad that people automatically have to discredit your hard work? Like, I was talking to Jaclyn Hill about this because obviously, if you guys watched her episode, she was on my podcast. She just hit a year of sobriety. I'm so proud of her. Like, she has overcome so much, and she was such a huge inspiration for me to stop drinking and someone that I go to a lot if I'm ever struggling with drinking. And she has just worked so hard on her fitness and just lifestyle journey and has obviously dropped so much weight after a year of not drinking alcohol. It makes a huge difference. You guys like, alcohol makes you gain so much weight. And again, I'm not saying I'm not going to drink forever or not going to not drink forever. I don't know what my goal is. This is just kind of something that I wanted to do for me and no one else. And if I ever choose a drink in the future and people want to judge me for it, that's fine, because it's not their journey, it's mine. But the second Jacqueline's body started showing her lifestyle change and she was dropping a bunch of weight, people automatically, oh, you're on Ozempic. You're on semi glue tied. Why can't we just, like, celebrate someone's hard work? I just don't get it. And also, people like Jacqueline and I are such open books. Like, we would tell you I would 100. If someone was was to ask me that question when I was trialing semi glue tied for three doses, I would have said, yeah, I'm trying it out. I don't care. But I'm not. And I am really grateful and proud of the journey that my body has been going through and that it does show. No matter how old you are, no matter what stage in life you're in, you can make a change. Because I look back at photos even when I was 21 when we got married, and my body is so much more fit now, and it's just crazy. So as far as, like, the mental struggle with alcohol, I would say Vegas was the most challenging aspect of it for me, because obviously, all everyone does in Vegas is drink now, like, when we're out with our friends or on the bow, I'll drink like a nowadays, which is like, those little THC seltzer drinks. They have 5 milligrams of THC in them, and I love it because it gives me, like, a little bit of a buzz, but not anything that's gonna, like. Like, I'm still out surfing, you know, on the back of the boat. Like, obviously, it's not putting me out or anything, but it makes you feel like you're participating, I guess, with your friends and stuff. And like, last night at the UFC party, I was just drinking some Diet Coke and Dr. Pepper and eating chips and salsa, and I didn't feel weird. And I also think I'm past the point now with, like, all my closest friends that they just know I'm not drinking. So it's not like a, oh, you're not drinking. Why aren't you drinking? Because I think in the beginning that is hard of people kind of not interrogating you. But they have a lot of questions about it, which is totally fine. And I'm an open book. But then it kind of gets tiring because you're like, yeah, I'm not drinking. And they're just kind of like, well, why? Like, why don't you just drink? And I'm like, well, because I don't want to right now for me in my life, you know. So it's nice that I'm kind of past the point that with that with everyone in my life because they just kind of know. And I just feel like I have a lot more energy, I feel healthier. I feel like I'm achieving certain goals when it comes to like my fitness journey that I wasn't able to achieve before. And it's so weird to see my body kind of the wrongs we must right, the fights we must win, the future we must secure together for our nation. This is what's in front of us. This determines what's next for all of us. We are marines. We were made for this like tone up. Even after kids where I'm like, whoa, like my belly button didn't used to look like that because now it's like getting more fit. Which is funny because I actually feel like I'm discovering so much more loose skin on my belly as I'm dropping weight because I'm not like filling out the loose skin anymore, if that makes sense. So that's kind of an interesting thing. But other than that, I feel, I feel really good and I'm so glad that I'm doing it. Scott's been doing it too. Have you drank at all? See? See A supportive king. It's actually funny too, cuz even David was like, I've noticed how much less I drink now that my wife doesn't drink. Like even when we're out to dinner and stuff. He's like, it feels so weird just ordering myself a cocktail when you're like drinking a diet Coke. But. And I don't need him to stop drinking. I was like, you enjoy your alcohol, like do whatever. Cuz he's not an excessive drinker by any means. So yeah, it's, it's been fun. And also like going out to dinner and stuff on date nights. I'll get like a fun mocktail or whatever. So I feel like I'm, you know, part of the. I'm enjoying the experience. But, yeah, I just kind of want to give an update because I know a lot of people have asked and asked if I've gone back to drinking or anything, but I have not. So, yeah, we'll see. We'll see how it goes. I do turn 30 in April, and I'm not gonna lie, I don't know if I'm not gonna drink on my 30th birthday. It's kind of a big deal. But I'm in between Two completely different 30th birthday party ideas. One being, like, Mexico or somewhere tropical where we can kind of escape and have, like, a private place to be where no one bothers us, and I can just lay out on the beach and do nothing for a week. Also, a VIP private tour in Disneyland sounds kind of iconic. I was talking to one of my friends about that, and she was like, oh, that's like, all I do now is the VIP tour, which. I'm a Disney nerd. Okay. Like, we're going back to Disneyland for Ziggy's birthday for the second year in a row, per his request. He's like, I don't want a birthday party. I want to go back to Disneyland. I'm like, okay, great. So we're going. And I looked up the VIP tours and I said, oh, oh, we're expensive. We're expensive. And it doesn't even include the price of the tickets or, like, your hotel or whatever. So for Ziggy's birthday, we are not doing that because he's turning six and he can learn to stand in line. Love you. But, like, I grew up two hours away from Disney, so we always had season passes. So I'm a Disney nerd. I love Disney. And I was like, how sick would it be on my 30th birthday party to do an adult only trip to Disneyland and do a VIP tour where they, like, escort you to the front of the line. And that would be iconic, like, so. And I wouldn't want to drink for that because, I mean, California Adventure, like, kind of sells certain drinks, but nothing like that's gonna give you a buzz or anything. So I was like, it'd be kind of fun. Maybe, like, take an Eddie with our group of friends. That would be so funny. Do you want to know? See, but like, Danny, I'm like, love you. I want you, like, to be there. But she's going to give birth right before, so, like, she can't go to Disney. But you know what? It would be a solid group of friends. Like, we would have so much fun. Okay, maybe we're going to Disneyland. We'll see. Don't hold me to that. Anyways, okay, let's get into saucy questions, because that's what you guys are here for. So let's read them. I had a lot of people ask if I bleach my asshole. No, Scott. Scott. Can't hold it. I know. Well, I just really wanted to jump into it. Like, raw and dirty. Like, let's raw dog it. No, I don't bleach my. But you know what? Doesn't Tana Mojo bleach her? And she's a. Like, I'm obsessed. Tana, I need to meet you. Like, Tiana had great things to say about Tana, too, because she met her I. And I love that she openly is like, yeah, I bleach my. Like, what's it to you? I want a pretty pink little butthole. Maybe I'll try it. Should I feel like, okay, not film it, but, like, film, like, hey, I'm about to bleach my asshole. Tick tock would probably take it down, though. Well, we'll see. Also, I want to know, like, does it burn? Because, like, isn't. Have you ever bleached your asshole? Because, like, bleach is supposed to burn. Yeah. If you saw your skin for too long. Like, I already experienced enough burning butthole sensations when it comes to, like, eating spicy ramen. Like, I don't know if I. If I wanna, like, purposely do it, you know? But we'll see. Okay. Crazy. I've already talked about this. Craziest places you've ever had sex. Nowhere. Like, okay, well, one time in a public jacuzzi. We did do that. Yeah. Yeah, we did do that one time. It was like a wave. It was like a wave pool in there. I was on top of him. I don't know. People are probably watching from, like, the above. Hopefully no one has it on film or anything that would be. Ooh, how to keep the marriage spicy. When you feel like your husband wants someone else, get a new husband. Yeah. What's going on? Like, your husband shouldn't want anyone else, I think. Listen, relationships always have es and flows, right? Like, right now, David and I are obsessed with each other, and we talked about the other day, but, like, I feel like we've. We're in probably one of the best stages of marriage we've ever been in. And I'm so grateful for that, which is why I'm like, I don't really have one. Want to have another kid right now. It Up. As much as I would love another baby, my marriage is doing great. I don't want to. Yeah. Anyways, I feel like all marriages go through ebbs and flows for both people for the joint party, but you should never feel like your spouse wants someone else and that you should have to fight for him to want you more. That's not. That should never be happening. And that's a conversation you should have with him, because. What the. All right. When did you first go to a bar? I'll be totally honest with you. I never really got into the bar scene, like, even really. I got married at 21. You guys. Like, I turned 21 in April of 2016. I got married in June of 2016. And I was in nursing school during that time. And if you've ever been in nursing school, like, you really don't have a lot of time to party. I also had two stepdaughters that were very, very young at the time. Well, obviously, I still do, but, like, at that time, they were very young, and David worked full time. I was working while I was in nursing school. It was a lot. So I didn't really go to the bars. I went maybe, like, three times total to Scottsdale after I turned 21. And I was taking, like, white gummy shots and stuff, but I remember being able to afford, like, one shot because it was, like, 15, and we were so poor. It's ridiculous. Like, so poor. So I. I definitely didn't go to a bar till I was at least 21. Like, I never had a fake ID. I never tried to sneak in because I was such a good girl. Like, so terrified to be in trouble. Also, the nursing school I went to was private. And if you ever got in trouble for, like, things outside of school, they would kick you out. They were, like, psycho. They would inspect our nails, our hair, our dress code. Like, they were a little bit crazy. So I was so scared to ruin my, like, nursing school journey that I didn't do anything crazy. So the most, like, I ever experimented with that was, like, when Dave and I went out to eat and I would order a drink. And I also was the type of. That would, like, plug my nose when drinking alcohol because I hated it so much. That changed real quick after I gave birth. I said, wine, let's drink it like water, huh? Probably why I stopped drinking. All right. How do you get freaky without thinking? It's weird. Well, here's the thing. I think it takes time to get comfortable with that person. Scott is an anomaly. He will meet someone and Just have no given. He will literally meet people and just show them every crevice of every part of his body. Lick every crevice of someone else's body. Feel free to cut this, by the way, if I'm speaking too much about this. But, like, I feel so shy when it comes to that. I feel like this year alone has been the first year that I have, like, fully not given a fuck in the bedroom. And here's the thing. I think we've always had a great sex life, and I've always been down to experiment and do certain things, but I feel like it was like, turn the lights off or I'm. I'm too shy. I want to go under the covers. Or I don't know, just being, like, weird and giddy about it. Like, oh, my God, stop, please. And I'm like, actually, keep going. Love it. But I do feel like as you get older as a woman, you really do come more into yourself. And I have felt the biggest change this year in my life. Approaching 30. And my best friend Ashley turned 30 this last February. And even she was like, dude, 30s are so different. And everyone talks about it, especially women, but she's like, just wait. Like, 30s, you truly come into yourself. You're like, a quarter done with or not a quarter. Well, no, a third done with your life, pretty much. Ew. That's weird to think about. I hate that. Yuck. But I think you just kind of prioritize what matters and what doesn't. And I'm like, you know what? It's just better to let go in the bedroom and enjoy it, because afterwards you're never going to be embarrassed or, like, regret what you did? Because how do you know that you like someone? Or you. Sorry. How do you know that you like something or you don't like something in the bedroom if you don't try it? And I feel like that is the beautiful thing about intimacy, is you are being intimate with that person, which makes you vulnerable. But if you trust. Trust that person, then you should, like, you should experiment and also talk about and communicate what you want to try and what's off limits for you. Because you might not be comfortable with something now, but you could in, like, you know, the next few months as you progress in your intimate relationship. So hopefully that makes sense. Oh, everyone's asking about my favorite vibrator, guys. It's in my Amazon. It's the best thing ever. I have been linking that vibrator for, I mean, probably, like, five years or so. It's the best I have bought and been gifted vibrators that are five times the cost of that, and they don't even compare. Like, I think it's like $20, like, 19.99 or something. It's just a standard wand. And what I love about it is it's great on your own, but it's also great with your partner. So I love it. And I think a vibrator makes any, like, intimate experience with another human even better. Like, especially if you're a woman that struggles with an orgasm, why aren't you using a vibrator in bed? Like, oh, and if you're with someone that's like, that's cheating, or, oh, my God, that means I'm not satisfying you. Like, I can't even make you go, you're insecure. You're with an insecure man. Yes. And send them this. Tell them you're insecure, because guess what? What's the percentage? We looked it up before, but it's like less than 30% of women can have an orgasm just from vaginal penetration. So men, if you're listening to this and your woman's not using a vibrator, they're probably faking it. So you know what else, like, just irks me is when those insecure, petty ass little men not only don't want the woman using a vibrator in bed because they can't get the job done, but then they refuse to go down on a woman. Ew. You're the ick. You're literally the ick. Like, you want all the pleasure, and your woman can even get off. Like, maybe learn how to work your mouth or something. Like, ill. You want to put your penis in her mouth, but you won't go down. No, stop. Yuck. You're the ick. So, yeah, get a vibrator. And if your partner has an issue with you getting a vibrator, it's a partner problem, not a you problem. Everyone's requesting for M to be back on the pod. We literally already talked about that. We need to have her back. Scott and I were thinking of having you guys, like, send in confessions or funny stories or, like, friend advice. I feel like it would be so cute to have her on for that. How can I be more comfortable giving my partner head? Any tips? I know it's tmi, girl. There's no TMI around here. It's okay. My biggest trick is if you use a hand, you don't have to go as deep. So if you struggle with gag reflexes, put a hand or two. Just stack them right on top of each other and then you don't have to go as deep in your throat. Is that funny, Scott? I mean, you should be the one giving tips over here. Okay? I have a six foot five husband. Okay. I lucked out. Yeah. Also, if you struggle with swallow, I don't know why I'm whispering. Swallowing, like you're gonna hear what I'm saying. What an idiot. Let him finish under your tongue. So put your tongue to the roof of your mouth like that. And then I've read a lot of like, books from like PhD, like doctors and that like, specialize in sex and because I like to hear, I like to read, like the anatomical. Like, I'm like the weird nerd nurse. Anyways, yeah, the under the tongue thing helps a lot. Spitters are quitters. I'm totally teasing. If you spit, you're not a quitter. Because honestly, the hardest part is getting it in your mouth. So you're doing great, sweetie. Lots of questions about like, grooming. Like, hair wise. I have laser hair removal. So I have laser under my armpits, my whole vag. And yes, that's right. They lay my ass on my stomach, put my knee up and say, spread it. And they go and just zip, like cinch. All that hair, just gone. I also do laser from the knees down on my legs. And it's been so nice. My legs are so dry right now. But if you are shaving, I have like the coarsest, blackest, darkest hair and the worst bikini line. I swear to God, my pubes go down to my mid thigh. Like, it doesn't matter how much I would shave. I always had like a five o'clock shadow. My entire. It was awful. And we all know I wear floss for a string bikini. Okay, yeah. Anyways, shave with a men's razor that's fresh, okay? Very sharp blades. Use baby oil and then baby powder after to kind of like close up those pores. Also exfoliate the area before you shave. It will help with ingrown hairs. So I hope that helps. But I'm telling you guys, look on Groupon because that's when I first started getting laser hair removals. Before I even had Ziggy. We were living in San Diego and I bought a Groupon for super cheap. It's so worth it, you guys. Like, laser has changed my life, like, as a woman. Especially someone that's always in bathing suits. Like, we're always the pool, we're always on the bow, on the lake or at the beach. So I'M always in a bikini. And I would have to shave on a daily basis and still would be so insecure of my bikini. Like, back in the day when I used to use FaceTime, what's it called? Facetune. Oh, my God. I used to, like, zoom in on my puss and, like, blur out all of the, like, razor burn anything. I don't have to do that anymore. I don't even have, like, I don't even have photo editing apps on my phone besides a Tesla app. Because I love her, like, little film filters. But yeah, that just shows, like, going from young 20s to 30s. Like, you just stop giving a. Like, I literally don't give a anymore. Other people do, though. They really care about my life for some reason. I'm like, girl, get a hobby. I don't know why everyone's asking if everything's okay with Emily and I. Em and I are fine. Like, we actually just voice memoed about this two days ago, and we've gotten to a point where we don't feel obligated to share our friendship as much online anymore because people, A, always want to pin us against each other and it's ridiculous. And B, it's such a special, like, friendship. All of my friendships are that I don't feel the need to blast them online because it automatically attracts hate, pins people against each other, and creates unnecessary drama and rumors that aren't even true. So Em and I are fine. We literally just saw each. Was that two days ago? I saw her. Yeah. So everything's great. Just everyone is so invested. Oh, same with Ash. Oh, my God. If I don't post Ashley on my Instagram at least once a week. Are you and Ashley okay? I'm like, I see that five days a week. Like, she's literally my neighbor. Our kids go to school together. Like, I see her every day in the pickup drop off line. We're fine. Everyone just calm down. Do you ever do giveaways? I do giveaways all the time on my Tick Tock Instagram. All the things. Oh, do you have a lollipop or anchor incision for your boobs? What did you do for your scars? I only have a lollipop, which I'm so grateful for. I thought I was gonna have to do an anchor scar when I got my boob lift and implants, but I only have a single incision from the bottom of my nipple down, which is my lift scar, and she was able to put my implant through the lift. As far as scar treatments, she gave me embrace, which Was like a silicone kind of patch that goes over it. But I. I'm not gonna lie, I only used it for, like, two weeks because it gave me a really bad rash. My skin is super sensitive. And, like, actually when I had my C sections, the glue they used to seal my C sections, I was allergic to. And it broke me out in hives both times from, like, my mid thigh all the way to my belly button. And I thought it was like the mesh underwear that they put you in after the C section. So when I had Stevie, I requested to not put the mesh stuff on. And I got my own, like, post op underwear, and it still happened. And my doctor said it was the glue. So I think the kind same kind of thing with, like, the silicone scar treatment was the same because I got a really bad rash. I also will get that with, like, certain laundry detergents and stuff. My skin is so sensitive, so I didn't really do any scar treatment. But my doctor is so good. Like, my scars are literally nothing. So I feel so grateful because we're about a year and a half post op, and I've never been happier with my boobs. That's the other thing too. Like, it sounds really selfish, but once you, like, are done having kids and then you do things to, like, help with insecurities. Like my boobs, right? They were saggy ass tube socks. But you know what? I was grateful to breastfeed, you know, and make as much milk as I did for my kids, but I really just wanted them lifted. And then now I'm like, do I want another baby? But I'm like, oh, I just got my boobs done and I love them. So I don't know. All right. Oh, my God. Recap your first time together. Like, David and I's first time. This is a great story. Have you heard this? Oh, my God. Scott goes, I need popcorn. I'm dead. Okay, so I'm gonna tell you the full, honest story, and David's gonna kill me for this, but it's so funny. So we had been texting, obviously, and we had met up a couple times. But, like, even on our first day, I wouldn't even let him kiss me. Like, he put his hand on my thigh at the movies, but, like, I don't even think I held it. Like, we hugged by, and he's like, you like, can I kiss you? And I said, no, no, sorry. So wouldn't even let him kiss me. And then when. Oh, oh, oh, okay. So he invited me over to his place, and I Knew we were going to have sex. And I was like, you know how girls, like, you know, you're going to a hookup and you, like, do the full everything shower. I, like, shave ex fully. I spent, like, 45 minutes in the shower. I'm like, I mean, I was butter. I was liquid butter. Like, my. Oh, yeah. I put perfume on, do a full face of makeup. Like, oh, my God, I really just did the most. Blew out my hair. I think I was wearing, like, Lululemon leggings and, I don't know, a T shirt. I wasn't. We were just going to chill, watch a movie, right? So I go over there and he's kind of acting weird. Like, he's sitting on the couch and he's like, oh, I just got done drinking a protein shake. And I was like, oh, like, he was such a gym rat back then. And he would chug these 800 calorie whole milk protein shakes in order to keep his weight on. Because one thing about David, his metabolism so fast, if he wants to gain muscle or, like, keep weight on, he has to eat. Like, last night. Goes to McDonald's four days a week after his workouts and gets two fudgeing McDoubles. It's disgusting. But we're sitting on the couch, and he's, like, sitting so far away from me, but almost, like, purposely. And we're watching How I met your mother. I think he was obsessed with that show. And I was like, his is kind of weird. And he's like. I'm like, is he gonna, like, make a move? Like, I'm not making a move. Like, what the. And mind you, we had only had we kissed yet. I think we had gone on two dates. First date, I didn't let him kiss me. But second date, we made out in his car in a Starbucks parking lot. And it was a steamy makeout session. I'm not even gonna lie. But it didn't go further than that. So I knew, going to his apartment, I was like, yeah, we're getting down and dirty. This man isn't even giving me the time. Like, he's, like, so far away from me on the couch, not touching me, not scooting closer. I'm like, does he hate me? Do I look ugly? Do I smell like, what's going on? And he goes. He's like, chug. That protein shake made me kind of nauseous. And I'm like, thinking in my head, no, you have to shit. Like, I knew immediately he needed to, but I'm like, I'm not judging. I'm like, oh, sorry. Like, you know, whatever. And he's like, I'm gonna go puke. And I was like, okay. So he goes to his bathroom, and I know he's just murdering that toilet. Like, 100. I couldn't hear anything, but I'm sitting there like, okay. So he's in there for, like, probably 10 minutes, and he comes out, and he's like, oh, sorry. That protein shake, like, just really made me so nauseous. He keeps, like, saying nauseous. I'm like, why don't you just admit that you have, like, massive diarrhea right now? And so he sits back on the couch, and I'm like, oh, I'm sorry. Like, do you want me to go? And I'm thinking. He's like, no. He's like, yeah. He literally was like, yeah, I want you to leave. And I left. I literally, like, walked out to my car, and I was like, this isn't even, like, a good walk of shame. This is like, we didn't even touch. And I'm kicked out of his apartment. So I left. And I literally was like, I'm never talking this again. Of course, like, years later, I. It comes out not even years later. Probably, like, three months later, when we were comfortable with her, I was like, did you have the massive runs? He was like, oh, I was all night. He was like, I hated myself because he's like, I have this hot sitting on my couch, smooth as butter. Pussy's ready to go, and I have bubble guts. And I was shitting all night. And I was like, man, that sucks. So anyways, then the next time I went over, we got down and dirty, and I remember, like, I was, like, straddling on top of him or something, making out. He, like, took my shirt off. Then I was like, give me a tour of your apartment. Ew. I was such a pick me. Gross. So I'm walking around his apartment topless in Lululemon leggings, and he's walking behind me. He's like, here's the kitchen. Whatever. Because I'm like, the reason I did that is because I was, like, trying to go to the bedroom because he had a leather couch. Like, what a single man thing to have, Like, a nasty. Like, I'm not trying to bang out on a leather couch. And then he took me to his room that had a mattress on a box spring. That's all he had. No, like, furniture, nothing. And yeah, lasted about three pumps, and that was it. And I was like, okay. And then I left. And then he basically. He didn't friend zone me, but he was like. Like, put me in, like, the hookup stage. He's like, yeah, I don't want to date. And I was like, bye. Blocked his number. But then he went to Verizon Wireless, got a new phone number, because if he wanted to, he would. Ladies. Okay, I'm getting a lot of questions about period sex. Saying that their men refuse no matter how light their flow is. And I'm like, grow a pair. Respectfully, I have one question for men like that. If all of the lights were off, could you tell the difference? No, you couldn't. Like, I get. If you don't want to go down, like, with period blood, okay, that's fine. And it's a mental thing. 100. Because if you didn't know they were on their period and it was pitch black, you wouldn't know. Let's be so for real. But, like, it's just your penis touching it. Like, your penis has probably been elsewhere worse, right? Like, it's a penis. It's not that special. So just put that chunk of meat in there. Go marinate it. Okay. It's giving soaking from the Mormon church, but David doesn't give a. Like, respectfully, the only thing I'm concerned about is my expensive sheets, so I'm putting a towel down. But, like, also, like, go in the shower. Like, what's the big deal? Why are these men so insecure? Insecure and just, like, ill. I don't know. Like, sometimes the men of our generation is just so disappointing to me. And then these men that are, like, going on through, like, I don't know why I can't find a girl. It's because of you. Yeah, it's. It's a you problem. Like, these bitches are out here being hot and doing the most, and you won't even get your dick wet from period blood. Like, get over yourself. Any who says, yeah, no, David doesn't give a fuck. And I don't think men should care. I get if you're, like, day two and it's, like, a little much. Okay, fine. Also for me, like, if I have really bad cramps, I just don't want a foreign object up there other than a tampon, so cool it. But yeah, I feel like, put a towel down. It's fine. Okay. Lots of questions about anal, AKA analyzing. Oh, okay, here's the thing. I. I'll give a quick recap because all the OGs here know when I met David, he told me that was his fetish. And I said, no, there will never be a penis going in my ass. But then I found this ebook, like, way back in the day from some sort of, like, sex doctor or psychologist or something that talked about how to safely have anal sex without basically, like, damaging the area or with it being as least painful as possible. So I will go through the tips that she gave that I have used that have helped me. Number one, you can't just go from nothing to a dick, okay? It will hurt. It's a muscle that you kind of have to, like, stretch and get it used to. So my biggest recommendation when it comes to women, Scott can speak for men. I can't. I don't have a penis. But when it comes to women, you need to stimulate other areas while also introducing anal. For example, use a vibrator with, like, him putting a finger in or, like, a little baby butt plug. There's, like, little teeny, tiny ones that are a great way to introduce kind of, like waking up that muscle and getting used to something going in instead of going out. Because obviously, that's all you're used to in that area, right? I also think having, like, a cute little butt plug in when you're doing doggy is so hot because the guy's like, holy, she has a butt plug in her ass. Like, they're gonna eat that up. There's also, like, butt plugs that sell in, like, a set that kind of, like, grow in size almost. You can kind of, like, stretch a little bit before a dick goes in. Also, obviously, I'm taking a break from drinking, but I feel like a couple glasses of wine does help kind of, like, relax you. I don't know if I've ever done it while high. Do you think that helps or do you think it's worse? Do you think being high helps? Okay, Scott says it helps. But also, like, if you're doing dogging, you have a vibrator on your. And he, like, puts in a thumb that can kind of help, like, warm it up a little bit. But her advice was kind of like that for introduction. If you think you have enough lube, double it. I'm not kidding. Because you don't produce any sort of lubrication down there. So you do need a lot of lube to help avoid, like, tearing. And it's just being too dry because it's just not comfortable. You need to, like, slow breathe and focus and almost, like, kind of push out a little bit in order for it to go in. Because if you're too closed off, it's Gonna hurt like a. Okay. Really, really bad. So this is just my honest thoughts. Anything else, Scott? I think that's it. This is just. This is just a girl helping the girls. Okay, but here's what I'll say. I was so against it. And then the first time we ever did it. Oh, by the way, I'm the type of girl that's really hard for me to have an orgasm unless I got a vibrator or something going on, like just a dick. It's hard to do it. For me, anal almost immediately had an orgasm. I literally remember the first time David and I ever did. Also, it's really important to do it with someone that you're comfortable with and that you trust. Because if someone's just going to shove their dick in your ass, it's going to hurt so bad. And that's so mean of a guy to do so if you're a man listening, don't do that. It's rude. But if you're with someone that you're comfortable with and you're able to make that relationship and be vulnerable with them, like I was with David, you're fine. Also, it's about talking it through. Like, you have to tell them, like, oh, that hurts. Or like move positions or whatever. Also, missionary is kind of nice when it comes to anal because it can't go all the way in because you kind of have like that gap to bridge. So that's nice. But I remember the first time Dave and I ever did and I had an orgasm, I literally started laughing. I was laugh. I was like hysterically laughing after because I couldn't believe it just happened. I was like, what the just happened? Just wild. So any whoses is that Is my take on and all your episodes inspired me to go a bit risky and do it on the balcony on vacation. That's iconic, you guys. When you tell me stuff like that, it just, it makes it so much better. Because if people judge stuff like this so much, like they think it's like, oh, the fact that she talks about that is so gross. It's not womanly, it's not conservative or classy. I don't give a. Because guess what? You're still listening. I will say the majority of my audience on stuff like Saucy Saturdays or things like this is a lot of conservative religious women because they weren't taught about this stuff growing up. And so they're figuring it out now. Women as moms, as people that are married, and they weren't told things like this. And so it does Help. So that's why I do it. And that's all that matters to me. Honestly. I'm an airline pilot, co pilot. And I slept with my captain, who's 17 years older than me. That's iconic. You're a queen for that. How often y'all. I love when you guys ask questions like this. Honestly, each week is different. Last night, incredible sex. This morning, David woke up and was that sex last night? He said that that was solid. I would say like two to three days a week. Sometimes like once a week, depending on how tired we are. Also traveling. Like, if I'm traveling for work or like, I don't know if, like, if we're on vacation with the kids or something, which isn't a vacation, that's a trip that's also hard because you're just so tired. But I would say between like, one and three days a week, depending on traveling, how tired we are and what's going on in our lives. Oh, a lot of people asking about the election and who I'm voting for. Listen, I'm registered as an independent for a reason. I don't bring politics into social media because it's going to piss one or the other party off. Right? And I feel like people would be surprised at my political views because they really do go not both ways, but I have different things I agree with from different political parties. And that's not speaking of Harris or Trump. I'm saying when it comes to being Democrat or Republican. And the reason is because I was raised extremely liberal. Like, extremely liberal. My parents were very liberal. David was raised very conservative. And as I've gotten older and being married to someone that. Who was. That was a police officer, that changed a little bit of my views. But I'm also very much like women's right advocate. So, yeah, I'm not going to say who I'm voting for, but I have political agreements with different parties for different reasons. And again, that's not speaking to the people that are running. It's speaking to the political parties. My boyfriend wants me to eat his ass, and I don't like it. Don't do it then, girl. I'm telling you right now, you don't like it, don't do it. Like, I mean, you could be like, go in the shower, scrub that shit till it's raw, and then we'll talk. But, like, if you're not into it, you're not into it queen. Like, that's just. That's just the facts. How do I ask my boyfriend to suck on My toes. Without sounding like a creep, please help in the moment. Like, I feel like when there's like certain kinks or something that it's intimidating to think about sitting down and having a conversation with someone. Be like, so how do you feel about sucking my toes? Like, I feel like it needs to be like you guys are making out your hot and heavy and you're like, put my toes in your mouth. You know, then he'd be like, oh, I feel like in the moment it's hard to be like, no, I'm not doing that. Cuz then it kind of like makes it awkward and like breaks that moment up. So I feel like when you're already hot and heavy into it, then you give your requests and it's kind of hard for a guy to be like, no. Unless he's a. My sex drive has been so low since getting married in July. Any advice? Well, you just got married, so I would say go check your hormones. We actually have a lot of friends that have had issues where they have to get their hormones checked and it's really helped them. So check your hormones because that's a big thing. Also, are you on birth control? Are you on any like anti depression or anxiety medications? Because those also contribute heavily to women's hormones and their sex drive. So definitely look into that too because that could be contributing to that. I'm interested in getting my nipples pierced. Does it hurt? I love the look, but a bit nervous. I love my nipple piercings. You guys know I've had them done twice because I had them done before I had kids and then I breastfed, got my boobs redone. Not redone, but I got my boobs done. They weren't done before. And then I repair them. I'm obsessed with them. I think they look hot. I love when they show through clothes. I think it makes sex fun. It makes you feel confident. Actually a group of my girl, like my best girlfriends, I'm the only one with my nipples pierced and they are all making an appointment to all get their nipples pierced together. I'm going with them. Isn't that fun? So I'm literally gonna go with them while they all get their nips pierced. Because I, I told him, I was like, you guys have to do it. Like it's such a hot piercing. And that when I got them redone because David for years was like, I'm so excited for your nipple piercings to come back because they're just like such a hot piercing. And so when I got him redone, I surprised him and he was like, holy. That video went viral because everyone was dying. Because I literally just flashed him. I did the same to my mom. I said, hey, drop them out, let me see them titties. Question of the century. Deep throat or just the tip? Love you, girl. Last night, major deep throat. Sometimes it's fun just to lay there on your back. And then they kind of like fuck your face. Is that bad to say that was me last night. I just had two hands right on the ash cheeks. You listen, when you've been together for 10 years, you have to keep it interesting. And last night was interesting. And that's why when he woke up, he was like that sex. Last night he had like that post sex glow. I said, sorry, you're doing it for me. You really are. All right, two more questions. Let's see. Are you bisexual? No. Are you Mormon? Did the thing I just say about my husband, my face tell you I'm Mormon? Because I'm not. I didn't even know what the Mormon church was until probably like junior high because I grew up in California and like central coast California. There's not a lot of Mormons there. Like it's usually like Southern California. And I literally thought it was like a club I wasn't part of. Like I was like, what's being Mormon? Like, is that like an after school club? Like what's going on? And then I think it was like when I saw kids going to seminary and I was like, what the is like they just gonna like leave campus and walk somewhere? Like, I want to be part of that. It was the Mormon church. And then my friends told me and I said, oh yeah, I'm saying far away from that. What ever came so hard? You farted? No out your like I've like queefed because my husband's massive third leg, but I've never farted on my ass from having an orgasm. Like what kind of orgasms are you having? My honest answer is no. But if you have, good for you, queen. Like you get it. How do you take care of your mental health? Well, that's not really. I don't know why I just read that question out loud, but it already did. Therapy is great. Disconnecting from my phone, ignoring the haters. I stopped looking at my mentions on Tick Tock and I hardly look at my comments anymore. Not because I don't love you guys, but because people are so psycho. I also cannot stand people that use other creators names for a clout and attention because they know they're going to get Bullied. Therefore their engage to go up. Like when people make videos just to talk about me or other creators because they know people in the comments are going to annihilate us and therefore they're going to get views. So you want to be famous on social media by being a bully? That's embarrassing. Like what makes me laugh is when people leave hate comments like from their like actual profile and then their boss or like husband or something will comment and be like, ew, this is not a good look. I'm her boss. I'm like oh, by. So I just like stopped looking at them because no matter what I do, someone will always have some to say and I don't even care anymore. Go talk your the boat has been huge because that forces me. I have no service on my phone. I live in the moment. I disconnect. I hang out with my kids, my friends, my husband. I also feel like not drinking has helped my anxiety ten fold. Drinking makes me really anxious. Especially like after a night of having a lot of wine. I feel like the next day I wake up very, very anxious. So that has helped me a lot. You guys look so in love after so many years. It's so inspiring. We really are. Thank you so much for saying that, by the way. I. I do think it's really sad that people think it's like a show. And I've seen that on like other couples accounts. Like I've really seen people do the most when it comes to couples content because they know it's going to do well. And I get it. Like I'm not gonna ever talk negative about them because I don't know what's going on behind closed doors. They could really just be super in love. But I know what it feels like when people have an opinion about myself, my relationship, my family, and they're just so wrong that it shows me that I will never do that to other people. Because we share on social media what we choose to share. Like, you only see what I want you to see and I see that. I say that in the most respectful way. But there's just so much you don't see. And people think that we share everything. You can't keep anything private. You see maybe two minutes of my day, maybe two minutes of my day. And on Instagram you see like photos from my week in my photo dumps or whatever. But there is so much behind the scenes and so much that I don't share. And it does make me laugh when people are like, oh, you just showed this for clout. I'm like, do you know how much I could share about my life that would get so much clout and attention. But I just choose not to do it because I, A, want to keep it private, B, think it's inappropriate, and C, don't care to exploit my life enough in order to get more views. I just don't. Like, I'm so content of what I share. And I have such a great relationship with my followers that I just share what makes me happy and what I want to share. And my relationship in my marriage is one of those things. And I think the reason I like to share it is because we have gone through so much trial and in our 10 years together, we have experienced more than people do in an entire lifetime. Like even like the custody battle with the girls. Like, that's not something a normal marriage has to go through, you know? And I was pregnant with Ziggy when that happened. Like, it was awful. Just so much financial turmoil and struggle and nursing school and living long distance in two different states, like taking care of his grandpa and hospice. Just so much that we've experienced. And I'm so proud of where we are right now. And I think I enjoy sharing it because I show people that it is possible to fight and get through it together. And that even though you've been together for a decade, it doesn't mean you can't fall more in love. Because I feel even more in love with him now than I ever have before. That doesn't mean we don't have arguments and fights because we, like, people always ask, like, do you guys ever fight? Of course. Of course we have arguments. Like, David's grandparents were married for 73 years. They got married in a courthouse after meeting three days prior. They were together for literally 73 years. They're so in love. They died within a year apart. Because his grandpa was just so broken hearted and kept her ashes right next to his bedside. Would talked to her like with his hand on her ashes and her recliner was right next to him. Like he was pretty much deaf and blind at the end, but he, even though he couldn't see her, like he just felt her presence. And his grandpa, his grandma always said, my friends who say they don't fight with their husbands, I feel bad for them because how do you progress in a relationship if you're not having those arguments? Like not arguing or fighting? Of course, not excessively, but like having those difficult moments is how you progress forward depending on how you handle them. Do we ever like have blow up screen fights? No, we don't. We're not like that. Like, we'll have stern arguments if it comes up, but it's mostly just like bickering here and then here and there. But it's how you learn from them and progress and move forward and understand your partner of oh, he didn't like when I did this or said this and she didn't like when I did this or said that. It's like, that's so important because now I know, I know the things that bother him. I know his boundaries and he knows mine. And that's how you have a solid marriage and relationship is because you have worked through those things and you don't just give up. You can't just give up because he's doing something that gives you the ick or you know that he said something that hurts your feelings. You have to tell that person so that they can learn and how you know if they're your person is, are they going to learn from it, change, move on and do better in the future? Because if it's a repeated pattern, then you have a problem. I also think no matter if your relationship is incredible or really shitty, I think therapy is incredible for couples because it gives you a safe space to communicate and it helps you problem solve in whatever you're going through. So any whose is. That's my. That's my two cents about our relationship. Okay, I think that's it. We are off to run some errands today because we're redoing the podcast studio. So next time you see us here, it's going to be different. But I actually think the next episode we're traveling for because we do have a really exciting guest coming on this next week. But I love you guys so much. Thank you for tuning in and say goodbye to the green floral wallpaper because it's about to be elev it up in this. Love you guys. Cheers.