← Chris Distefano Presents: Chrissy Chaos
Chris Distefano Presents: Chrissy Chaos
Chris Is Moving BACK to Staten Island?! | Chris Distefano is Chrissy Chaos
00:53:16
Chris Is Moving BACK to Staten Island?! | Chris Distefano is Chrissy Chaos
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- [00:01]
Chris Distefano
This episode is brought to you by Dutch Bros. Big smiles, rocking tunes and epic drinks. Dutch Bros is all about you choose from a variety of customizable handcrafted beverages like our rebel energy drinks, coffees, teas and more. Download the Dutch Bros app for a free medium drink. Plus, find your nearest shop, order ahead and start earning rewards offer valid for new app users only. Free medium drink reward upon registration. 14 day expiration terms apply.
- [00:28]
Vito
See Dutchbros.com what's up, everybody? Welcome to a holiday episode of Chrissy Chaos. Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, happy Kwanzaa, happy early January 6th. We're bringing all the holidays. We got a red wine, we got silver. What is it? Silver oak red wine. 2019. We got Vito's drinking some even though he said he's willing to have a gout flare up in the name of holiday season. We have a good episode for you today. It's just me solo. I asked Sam Morrill, I asked Mark Norman. They said they couldn't make it. But have no fear, the guests on Chrissy Chaos are going to get to another level because a not only have we hired a booking person, AKA Jasmine, is going to start fucking dming you pieces of shit. And to get you into the podcast. But two, we are moving our podcast studio to Manhattan. We are going to be coming to you live from Manhattan every week. And when you're in Manhattan, you get more guests. That. This wine is not bad, right?
- [01:28]
Giannis Papas
That's really good. It's really smooth. It's a dry.
- [01:31]
Vito
Yeah, it's a dry. This wine is fantastic. I want to shout out James Baby Doll Dixon for this wine. If you don't know him, Google him. He's a legend.
- [01:41]
Giannis Papas
Are you doing your. Are you doing your LeBron decision right now?
- [01:43]
Vito
I'm doing the LeBron decision I've made. Here's the thing with me is when I go, I just go. And there's good things about that and there's bad things about that. Sometimes it's good to just not overthink something and just r the band aid off. And sometimes it's not. And I never know where I stand. But here's what I do know. Here's what I do know is I made a decision two years ago to move my family. I've talked about it on this podcast. I talked about it on Joe Rogan, which, by the way, Joe Rogan episode out right now. Myself and Giannis Papist, we think. We think the history hyenas. We filmed an episode with Joe Rogan last week. And I'm going to tell you all about it. Giannis and I went down to Austin. Giannis filmed his comedy special down there and him and I went on as the history hyenas and did Joe Rogan show. And we thought it was going to come out the next day as it always does. And we are sitting here five days later and the episode has not dropped. So either you're watching it, you will see it today, or we will never be released. I don't know. But the episode was fire. But you know, I sold my house. Okay, I did all that. And we've been kind of living in chaos the last couple of years. I self induced by me and I've decided, you know, I've been, I've been trying to save money, I've been trying to work hard for you guys and for my family is. I'm, you know, just wanted to say I want to get my family out of this and we have found a home and we are going to be moving and my family's very excited and I'm very excited and I feel like I now know. What I feel like is something I did and maybe some parents out there can, can, can understand this is I love my children so much. But the decision I feel like I made two years ago was thinking about me more than I was thinking about them. And it took me some time to just really feel this pain to know that this decision that I'm making now is truly for them and not me. It is for them. And I mean, obviously some of it is, you know, for me. We wanna, you know, Jasmine, I want to live in a nice home and all that stuff, but. But I, I just think like to finally settle my family. We had, we were settled and then I took it away from them. And now to settle them again is really like, I feel happy about that because I have felt like a selfish piece of. For the past two years because of this move that we made. So I hope my family's happy. Hope they're happy and we'll see. And I also am, by the way, like, I just, I don't even know if I'm definitely getting this house. I just feel like I am. I'm doing that thing where like, like a woman finds out she's pregnant, you know, she's four weeks in and she starts telling everyone she's having a baby. It's like anything can happen, asshole. But I'm just, I'm doing that. I'm being that guy and I'm not waiting until like I've already emailed the schools in the neighborhood that we're moving back to and be like, can you take my kids in school? So that's just how I am. And I don't think that that's a bad thing, but I just think it's a me thing. Right.
- [04:38]
Giannis Papas
I mean, I heard you on the phone making plans to acclimate your daughter to Staten island, like right before we started.
- [04:44]
Vito
That is true. I've actually, I'm already on the phone with multiple principals from the schools that I'm looking at for them. So I do go harder, go home, and that's what it is. But listen, salud. Okay, Happy holidays. Vito and I, we went out. Me, Vito, you know, Vito baby Teeth, John the father, and then Brian Lancelot, we all went out. That's my. And Steve and Steve Ceccone Rice a Roni. We all went out. We had a beautiful meal at Bolatos. I'm wearing. Is this the right. Is the bottles on this side or on the other side?
- [05:13]
Giannis Papas
That's the Balato side.
- [05:14]
Vito
This is the Balato side. Emilio Balato's restaurant on Houston Street. I personally think the best Italian food in New York City gave us this beautiful Mets hat with the balato stitching on the side. We had a fantastic meal. If you are looking for a place to go this holiday season, you are probably not going to be able to get in, but go to Emilio Bilato's on Houston street in New York City. In my opinion, one of the best New York City red sauce joints. I would say the best Italian food. I love it. Great people, great vibes. Always a line around the block, but worth the wait. Unbelievable. Tiramisu. We had a great holiday dinner, drank wine, ate, and then Vito and I. I don't know if Vito, I'm about to tell you this about to he. Do you realize, do you know that you escaped? Do you know what I'm talking about?
- [06:03]
Giannis Papas
Did you go out?
- [06:04]
Vito
No, you escaped. We went to a dinner. Me, you, John the father, Brian Lancelot and Steve Cicconi Rice a Roni. Yeah, there is around the Northeast United States right now, may even be in other states, but it's all over the news in Northeast. A ravaging gastrointestinal norovirus going around. I mean, ravaging people. Diarrhea, vomit, you name it, it this is. This norovirus destroys you. At that dinner. Steve Ceccone Rice a Roni and Brian Lancelot both caught it, went down. Vomiting, diarrhea like you can't imagine. Brian Morton who has beautiful long hair like Lancelot. Puking in his hair. He shit on his floor. Steve Ceccone Rice a Roni puked all over his laptop. No, no. Me, you and John. The father escaped. How did we escape? Do you know how we escaped?
- [07:00]
Giannis Papas
By not taking leftovers.
- [07:02]
Vito
By not taking leftovers. One. But by what? Reading the case for Christ. Me, you and John are. Are firm believers in the case for Christ. We've spoke about case for Christ and we have the power of Jesus Christ amongst us. And we were shielded where Steve Ciccone Riceroni and Brian Lancelot have rejected the case for Christ and have rejected Jesus in their lives. And guess what? The norovirus got into them and did not get into us. Let's give a round of applause for Jesus Christ, everybody. Thank you, Jesus. You're my boy. Happy birthday, by the way. Happy birthday. Coming. I got a big G's. Got a big birthday coming up. What is he, this big 2000 big 20.
- [07:38]
Giannis Papas
24. Well, 20. 24 plus 33.
- [07:42]
Vito
Right, so 2000. So Jesus has turned in 2,057.
- [07:48]
Giannis Papas
But wait, weren't you.
- [07:49]
Vito
Right, 24 plus 33. 57, yeah, 2000. Happy 2000 57th birthday to my man. J.C. you did not.
- [07:57]
Giannis Papas
You were pretty astonished by Brian Morton ordering food to go.
- [08:01]
Vito
Here's the thing, okay? You go to a place like Balados. These people, real deal Italians, they do not understand. They don't even know what that meant. When Brian says, can I get a meal to go? They said, what? He said, yeah, can I get the Cacio Pepe to go? They come out with a wonton soup cup that they probably found in a back alley at the Chinese food next door. They dumped that out and they put Cacio Pepe in the wonton soup cup. The guy, Emilio, who's a great guy, the brothers Emilio, Mario and Anthony, shout them all out. Shout out. Shout out to Bellotto brothers. Great kids, the Vitolo brothers. I should say sorry, Go check out Vitolo is down in Florida. That's their other restaurant. That. That's what this is on this hat. Great kids. Emilio goes, you got food to go? I said as I was leaving. He goes, yeah. He goes, the matter with you? And I get it. They couldn't understand. They said, what is this, a Olive Garden? You're getting food to go. You either eat the food or that's it. I'm not giving it to you to go like an old school. Places like that, they just don't do food to go. They don't do food to Go. And they don't do credit cards. That's how they roll.
- [09:06]
Giannis Papas
Yeah. And they don't like. They don't like when you share.
- [09:08]
Vito
No, they don't want that.
- [09:09]
Giannis Papas
They don't want two guys sharing on one plate.
- [09:11]
Vito
Yeah, they don't want that. And they also don't want. And I respect this. They also don't want you ordering off the menu. They're like, we'll tell you what we have and what you're gonna eat, face. What do you mean? You're gonna look at the menu and tell me what you want? I'll tell you what you want, you piece of.
- [09:23]
Giannis Papas
And you got yelled at when we walked in.
- [09:25]
Vito
I got yelled at by the father, which I always do. I got yelled. I said, hey, you know, because it's a whole process there, man. I'm telling you. Go to Emilio Bilato's on House and street, one of the best Italian restaurants in, I think the best Italian restaurant in New York City. I love their food.
- [09:42]
Giannis Papas
So.
- [09:43]
Vito
But. And, you know, it's fun. The father's out there. You know, he's.
- [09:45]
Giannis Papas
He's.
- [09:46]
Vito
He's old school kind of guy. Great guy, but, you know, he's got. He's bravado. He's old school New York. And I come in, and Mario always gets me the reservations there. Really takes care of me. Shout out, Mario. Great guy. Shout out to dsny. So he. He. He always says, hey, text me, you know, I'll. I'll take care of you. Which he always does. Beautiful, man. And he goes. So I go. I go to. I see the father, and I said, oh, hey, Mario sent me. I think there's a table for five. And he's like, who the fuck is Mario? What do you mean, Mario? I was like, your son. Your son's name is Mario. And it goes, get in the back. And then they had a table set up in the back. And I got fully yelled at in front of a crowded restaurant of people. But I got to be honest with you, to me, it's all part of the show and all part of the fun, and I actually enjoyed it. I really enjoyed that. I just enjoyed it. I enjoyed. I enjoy the company there. I enjoy the real New York energy of it all. It's like, you know what? Even if he said. Even if he fucking punched me in the face and threw me through a wall, I would be like, this is great. This is part of the experience. You know, if he. If he told me I'm a piece of dog shit, I wouldn't Even care if you spit my food. It's just part of the experience.
- [10:58]
Giannis Papas
I was getting hugged by Mario a lot.
- [11:00]
Vito
Yes. Mario is a hugger. Our good friend Mario Vitolo. Great dude. I believe one. I believe the whole family owns a restaurant. I'm not exact. Great hugger. Kid loves to hug. And he lost a lot of weight. He looks good. It's very difficult to lose weight owning an Italian restaurant. And he did it.
- [11:15]
Giannis Papas
Yeah, I like.
- [11:16]
Vito
They all.
- [11:16]
Giannis Papas
They all dress really well. They're all like.
- [11:18]
Vito
Oh, they're put together, man.
- [11:19]
Giannis Papas
They play the part.
- [11:20]
Vito
They play the part and the lot. You. Not only can you get in, you can't. Not only can you not get in, you also can't get out. Once you're in the restaurant, the door is locked. You can't just open the door. You. Somebody from the wait staff has to come and let you out of the restaurant. So that's what I love. You've never seen it before. Great. If you get. If you ever go, take my advice, it's a dish they have that's off the menu. It's called the Chicken Antonio. Get the chicken Antonio. It's beautiful. Chicken parm, vodka sauce, prosciutto, fried prosciutto on the top, fried prosciutt. Beautiful. And Vito alerted me to the fact that when I speak to those guys, my accent changes. Right? What. What happens?
- [11:55]
Giannis Papas
You code switch. You got a hardcore Italian voice. When you start talking to guys now.
- [11:59]
Vito
Does that mean I'm not trustworthy, or am I just Chrissy Chameleon? Like, tell me, how does that make you feel when I do that?
- [12:05]
Giannis Papas
I don't know. I mean, if you go back and you listen to some episodes with people of different ethnicities we've had on you definitely, like, 10. You definitely tend to adapt to your situation.
- [12:12]
Vito
Yeah, I adapt to my situation. Just listen to me and Ms. Pat, you know, let me go. You crazy. Y'all craz, y'all.
- [12:20]
Giannis Papas
I got a. I got an uncle who will. When he meets. When he meets people who talk in an accent.
- [12:27]
Vito
Right.
- [12:27]
Giannis Papas
He thinks talking back in the accent will, like, help them understand.
- [12:32]
Vito
Yeah, because by the way, I'm doing it subconsciously. I'm not actively trying to, like, gain points with someone by sounding like them. My brain, I'm. I mimic.
- [12:41]
Giannis Papas
No, it's just you. It just comes natural to you. My uncle will, like, talk to a guy at a Chinese restaurant, and, like, when they're not, like, speaking the same, he will just do a Chinese accent, thinking it'll help.
- [12:51]
Vito
Yeah. Like, he'll say hello. We would like to a chicken over and we would like diet. We would want a pork. Is that good?
- [13:15]
Giannis Papas
That was perfect.
- [13:16]
Vito
Was that a Japanese.
- [13:17]
Giannis Papas
That sounded more Japanese.
- [13:18]
Vito
Japanese. I want a sushi. I want us.
- [13:27]
Giannis Papas
Yo, have you seen this Kim Kardashian music video?
- [13:29]
Vito
No, but Jasmine's upstairs so yeah.
- [13:32]
Giannis Papas
Santa baby.
- [13:34]
Vito
Whoa. She is like a fucking smoke show. I can't believe like I know a person who like have, has had sex with her. Oh, Pete, Pete. Whoa. Look at that. What is the point of this video? No idea.
- [13:53]
Giannis Papas
Just drop today. We can't play the music because we'll get, we'll get copy.
- [13:58]
Vito
That's me. What the, what is the point of this?
- [14:03]
Giannis Papas
I think Travis Barker produced a Santa Baby cover and she's in it.
- [14:07]
Vito
Everyone's doing Santa Baby now. Sabrina Carpenter. I watched the Sabrina Carpenter one on Netflix. I like that.
- [14:12]
Giannis Papas
I did too. I like, I enjoyed that.
- [14:13]
Vito
I watched that once with my daughter's a huge Sabrina Carpenter fan. So I watched it once with the family and then once Late night.
- [14:19]
Giannis Papas
Which one did you enjoy more?
- [14:21]
Vito
Late Night.
- [14:22]
Giannis Papas
Do you think they'll like.
- [14:23]
Vito
She's too, she's too young. She's beautiful but she kind of looks like, I mean I'm 40 years old so I'm much older than her. She's beautiful girl, but it's a little, she's a little kid.
- [14:32]
Giannis Papas
I enjoy, I genuinely enjoy her music but like I, I'm not like, I, I, there's like a disconnect for me because she looks like a little kid.
- [14:40]
Vito
Yeah, I was, I was obviously kid. I mean I, I, I, I didn't watch it late. I, I, I, I like I watch a Bach. Well, no, I, I watch it late night but I watch it late night for the guys.
- [14:48]
Giannis Papas
Nice.
- [14:49]
Vito
There was guys in it that had no shirts on. No. Yes. She's a little, I went to the. I, I will say though, I went to see her at the Garden. I went with my family because again my daughter's a big fan. Unbelievable performer. Really extremely talented girl.
- [15:01]
Giannis Papas
How do you feel about people who don't like parents bringing their kids to see her?
- [15:04]
Vito
Because the sex for me, it's like if you're, I'm, I'm my kids parents so leave it up to me if I think it's okay. Guess what? It's okay because it's, if it's not okay to you, then that's your parenting style. That's not how I roll. If I say it's okay for my daughter to see Sabrina Carpenter Then it's okay for my daughter to see Sabrina Carpenter. Okay? That's. That's how I roll. I'm drunk on this podcast right now, and I'm half.
- [15:30]
Giannis Papas
You had half a glass of wine?
- [15:31]
Vito
Yeah, but the way that it mixes with my blood pressure medicine, I get kind of zooted. Okay. And we're gonna go in for a little bit more. You want a little top off?
- [15:38]
Giannis Papas
Yeah, I'll do a little more.
- [15:38]
Vito
Look at. Dude, Vito's gonna be drunk driving the Nissan Rogue. Here we go. Look at this, folks. Honestly, this might be one of the best bottles of wine I ever had. Silver Oak 2019 Cabaret Sauvignon. Caps off. I'm only recently getting into red wine, and I do feel like I am becoming a bit of a wino.
- [16:02]
Giannis Papas
Okay.
- [16:03]
Vito
I've been drinking wine. I told Jasmine, actually this. And this is actually concerning to me because I'm not a drinker like that.
- [16:09]
Giannis Papas
No, you're not.
- [16:09]
Vito
15 days in a row, folks. 1 5. 15 days in a row, I've had at least one sip of alcohol from whether it be a beer, wine, or, you know, like, hard liquor. So what's the issue with that? Is that just holiday season? Is this the beginnings of alcoholism?
- [16:24]
Giannis Papas
That's just holiday season. I think you also. I think you did a. You had a streak like this back in November too, right? Because I think you had this exact same conversation with me and John where you were like, I think I'm becoming an alcoholic.
- [16:35]
Vito
Okay, so that's not good then, because it's mid December, so I'm saying it's 15 days, and it might be having.
- [16:40]
Giannis Papas
A sip of wine one day. Like. Like having a problem means you're getting, like, sloshed.
- [16:45]
Vito
No, I haven't been getting sloshed, but I have had alcohol almost every day, I guess, since November. And it is mid December, so maybe it's up to 40 days. Is that an issue?
- [16:55]
Giannis Papas
Yeah, we're on December 22nd right now. 23rd. December 23rd.
- [16:59]
Vito
I've only gotten drunk out of those days. Like, actually felt drunk today and, like, two other times, maybe three.
- [17:07]
Giannis Papas
And right now you're saying you feel drunk.
- [17:09]
Vito
I feel buzzed. But I've only, like. But this is having multiple glasses. Like, even what I just drank.
- [17:14]
Giannis Papas
I mean, that's a big. That's a big pour.
- [17:15]
Vito
What I. What I'll have at dinner is I'll have half this, and I'll. One.
- [17:19]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [17:19]
Vito
And then I have a little tequila. Is it a problem? Am I number one? Two questions is that. Do you think it's an issue. And two, is it. Is my face getting fatter? Am I getting a bit of fat face or do I still look trim?
- [17:32]
Giannis Papas
You still look trim. You look good.
- [17:33]
Vito
Thank you, sir.
- [17:34]
Giannis Papas
Also, how about all the people in the comments last week after you, like, went off on people?
- [17:37]
Vito
Yeah.
- [17:38]
Giannis Papas
Everybody being like, I actually like the diner episode.
- [17:40]
Vito
See? Thank you, folks. Jasmine. Jazz.
- [17:45]
Giannis Papas
She's upstairs.
- [17:46]
Vito
Oh, Jasmine. Violet. My daughter said Jasmine is sleeping. You called your mom? Jasmine, I love you, honey. I love my children. I love my family. Are you ready to move or you don't want to move houses? Do you want to move and go to a new school? Yay. Did you pick up my daughter's cat? Sounds.
- [18:07]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [18:07]
Vito
Okay.
- [18:09]
Giannis Papas
I think I mean, the. I thought you meant me personally.
- [18:12]
Vito
Do you think this move is good for me and will I be okay? What do you think? What's your gut?
- [18:19]
Giannis Papas
I thought. I don't know anymore, man. I thought you were going to be okay here.
- [18:22]
Vito
Is it. Am I the problem and I just can't find. I can't find. Like, I can't settle. I can't commit.
- [18:33]
Giannis Papas
Yeah. I mean, like, you moved here and you were happy. And even when you first moved here, you were like, this is great. I love it here. You were like, I can go out. I could see people. I'm so close to the city. You were like, for the first. For the first few months, you were thrilled. And then out of nowhere, one day you told me you didn't like it anymore and you wanted to move.
- [18:50]
Vito
Right?
- [18:51]
Giannis Papas
And then every day since, you've told me you hate it.
- [18:54]
Vito
So I'm good at convincing myself of what I want to be convinced of.
- [18:58]
Giannis Papas
I don't think you hated it here until you decided you wanted to move.
- [19:03]
Vito
But the house that I showed you is beautiful.
- [19:06]
Giannis Papas
It is.
- [19:07]
Vito
And it's good. Let me ask you a question, folks. Did you know that there's a nutrition plan that doesn't just help you lose weight, but actually has been shown to lower your biological age score? Did you freaking know that? Well, now you do, okay? And here's the thing. I don't want you to forget it because you know what it's called? Prolon. Prolon by L Nutra. Okay. L Neutra. Prolon. And if you don't use Prolon, do you know what the L and L Nutra stands for? Loser. You don't want to be a loser, so use Prolon by L Nutra. And here's the craziest part. It's a fast that includes food bang A fast that includes food. You thought a fast meant you don't need food. Well, Prolon's changing that. You can eat food and you're still fasting. Full disclosure, I've always been afraid of a diet with fasting. You know, fasting has become a part of my life over the last couple years. But I was always scared, I really was, because like, how am I not going to eat for all these hours? But with Prolon by El Nutra, I don't worry about that, about how am I going to eat because I get to eat, but yet I'm still fasting. Prolon's five day program, snacks, soups and beverages, all designed to keep your body in a fasting state. It's unlike anything you've ever experienced. Okay? And you know me, I've experienced a lot. Right now, Prolon is offering CHRISSY CHAOS listeners 15% off their five day nutrition program. Go to prolonlife.com chaos that's P R O L O N l I f e.com chaos for this special offer. That's prolonlife.com chaos p r o l o n l I f e.com chaos 15% off the five day nutrition program. Tell them we sent you.
- [21:12]
Unknown
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- [21:42]
Vito
Yeah, let me just be honest with you where I'm at as a person right now. I had some big changes in my life recently come up. Little nervous. Okay, here's the thing. I'm nervous about some up some decisions that I made and some upcoming things in my life. I'm very nervous about it. But there's a excitement in the nervousness. There's an excitement in saying, you know what, you're going to get out of your comfort zone here. Okay. You're going to do, you're going to go for something. You're going to go for something that's outside of your comfort zone and you're going to feel, try dude. I feel excited about that, but I feel nervous because if it doesn't work out, I'm going to really be in trouble.
- [22:24]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [22:24]
Vito
But I feel excited about the chance.
- [22:27]
Giannis Papas
You know how they say three strikes are out. Yeah, you're like, you're going into like the fourth inning.
- [22:32]
Vito
Like, dude, I've struck out twice and I. Yeah, no, I mean, you've struck.
- [22:37]
Giannis Papas
Out like, you struck out like seven times.
- [22:40]
Vito
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [22:41]
Giannis Papas
Like we're, we're halfway through this game at this point.
- [22:44]
Vito
Yeah, like, like, like MLB has changed the rules for me. They've allowed now they've allowed me to take more pitches.
- [22:51]
Giannis Papas
Wait, so we think Rogan might have come out today.
- [22:54]
Vito
I'm pretty sure Joe Rogan has come out today. But I have to be completely honest with you. I don't know.
- [22:59]
Giannis Papas
So.
- [23:00]
Vito
But this is what I want to say. I'm really happy doing History Hyenas again because I just enjoy it. I just enjoy being. It's just funny. The funny. A very funny version of me that I like comes out with Giannis.
- [23:13]
Giannis Papas
I agree.
- [23:13]
Vito
We're like, I'm not comparing us to this, like, as if to say we have that prowess. I'm not saying that at all. I'm just saying as a comparison, we're like Stockton and Malone. He will. He throws me the alley, oops, John Stockton. And then I'm Karl Malone and I dunk the jokes and have sex with 14 year old girls and impregnate them.
- [23:33]
Giannis Papas
As somebody who loved Hyenas, like on the original run.
- [23:36]
Vito
Right.
- [23:37]
Giannis Papas
Like, I, I totally agree with you and I understand why you like doing the podcast and you guys bring something out in each other and you're like, your, your inflection kind of vibes off each other and the episodes are great.
- [23:47]
Vito
I.
- [23:47]
Giannis Papas
Look, I hurt your feelings at dinner.
- [23:49]
Vito
You hurt my feelings at. Oh, yeah. Yes. Let me, let me say Vito, who has just told you that he's, he was a big History Hyenas fan. He's, you know, a good friend of mine. Now, we've been working together for. It's got to be coming up on two years. We've known each other for close to 10. He's a big comedy fan in the comedy world. History has been back for two and a half months. He hasn't listened to a single second of the new show, the Second Reich, as we call it. And that after I literally fucking took this guy out for a Christmas dinner, gave this guy a Christmas bonus, he's like, by the way, here's a picture of my open asshole that says, I don't listen to History Hyenas, bitch.
- [24:33]
Giannis Papas
I felt, dude, the look you gave me when I told you I didn't listen. Yeah, I felt awful. I Listened the next day, you were.
- [24:39]
Vito
Like, what'd you think of it?
- [24:40]
Giannis Papas
It's good. It's really good. It's back. It's. It doesn't.
- [24:43]
Vito
Do you think it's like, do you think there's a. We're missing a step from the first time? No.
- [24:47]
Giannis Papas
It doesn't feel like two guys trying to, like, recapture what they used to have. Like, you guys, like, the natural lingo is coming up. Like, I was, like, I was enjoying. And as somebody who knows you, I was even enjoying it more because, like, you guys talking about for the table. Like, I've always been amazed by the way you order food.
- [25:02]
Vito
Right.
- [25:02]
Giannis Papas
Like, it is insane. And, like, coming up with that, like, that whole concept of, like, the way Chris orders food is so insane. Like, just calling everything for the table.
- [25:08]
Vito
Yeah. Calling, like, hot guys and hot girls for the table.
- [25:11]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [25:11]
Vito
Yeah.
- [25:12]
Giannis Papas
Because you do order food that is not meant to be shared by four people.
- [25:15]
Vito
Yeah. Like, I'll. I'll order. What? Like, I'll order. I ordered cacio pepe for the table.
- [25:19]
Giannis Papas
You ordered. We didn't get our own entrees. You just. You. We got there, and you were like, how about we all just share food?
- [25:24]
Vito
Dude, I ordered fish for the table. Didn't I want a branzino for the table or a branzino for the table? A cacio pepe for the table. What else did I order for the table? The chicken Antonio for the table.
- [25:36]
Giannis Papas
Antonio. Seafood pasta.
- [25:38]
Vito
Yeah. I ordered entrees for the table. I do not order appetizers for the table.
- [25:42]
Giannis Papas
No. And then it's just a bunch of dudes, like, digging in a pasta together.
- [25:46]
Vito
The other day, me, Jazz, and her friends went out and I ordered a chicken parm hero for the table as an appetizer. Yeah. And I asked the guy to cut it in six pieces. Isn't that wild?
- [25:56]
Giannis Papas
That's great.
- [25:56]
Vito
But is it. But is it fun to go out? Is it fun? Yeah.
- [25:59]
Giannis Papas
No. Go down with you is a blast.
- [26:00]
Vito
But I. But. But the problem is, is I eat like that every day, and I can't do that.
- [26:05]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [26:06]
Vito
So what's the issue? Is that why I have high cholesterol, blood pressure?
- [26:09]
Giannis Papas
I don't think it's bad. Because what you do. I've noticed what you do. You order a lot of food, but you only have, like, a bite or two.
- [26:13]
Vito
Yeah.
- [26:14]
Giannis Papas
Like, you sit back and you let the other people.
- [26:16]
Vito
I enjoy what I enjoy. What I enjoy is I really do enjoy seeing other people happy and having a part in trying to make other People happy. I enjoy that. I just do. I like to see other people happy. And I'm. I think because of having kids now, I'm very comfortable with, like, it not being about me at all and me being in fifth place in my own life. I'm very comfortable with it.
- [26:40]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [26:41]
Vito
Dude. My Hulu Special is coming out in February, and I gotta be honest with you, because of the way they colored it, I look kind of hot, dude.
- [26:50]
Giannis Papas
Chris History Month.
- [26:51]
Vito
I look Chrissy History Month. That gave me February Black History Month, which is now known as Chrissy History Month. I kind of look kind of cute.
- [26:58]
Giannis Papas
You look cute that night.
- [26:59]
Vito
I did look cute. I look cute that night. My hair is much longer now.
- [27:04]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [27:05]
Vito
So. But I'm thinking I might cut it again because I just felt cute. I felt cute. Might delete on Hulu. Fell cute. Might delete on Hulu. My hair's starting to grow out in the back and like, kind of get. You know what I'm saying? Yeah.
- [27:18]
Giannis Papas
You want that? That's what you wanted. You said you wanted that baseball player.
- [27:22]
Vito
What do you think? Is it growing in nice now?
- [27:24]
Giannis Papas
I like it, dude. I think you should keep going.
- [27:26]
Vito
Yeah. It's the winter.
- [27:27]
Giannis Papas
You don't need. Like you're gonna.
- [27:28]
Vito
And my face is not fat.
- [27:29]
Giannis Papas
No.
- [27:30]
Vito
I think I. I thought I had a fat face. Shout out, Bilatos. Everybody shout out, Bilatos. Vitolo. Fort Lauderdale Bellottos. Vitolo. Bilatos. Vitola. Also shout out. I want to say Balato's is the best restaurant. You ready for this? I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. You didn't even ask for this. I'm going. The five best restaurants in. In all five boroughs. You ready for this?
- [27:50]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [27:51]
Vito
Let me put the hat on front for this. Five best restaurants. Does it look good in the front or. Yeah, you don't love it in the front.
- [28:00]
Giannis Papas
And up front, you look like an undercover cop. Backward, you look like a boy. So it's. It's whatever.
- [28:05]
Vito
And then what about hair like this? What do I look like?
- [28:07]
Giannis Papas
You look just like a cool kid. Like a cool cat.
- [28:10]
Vito
Cool. Dude. Remember when I went through a phase where I was calling everyone a cool cat?
- [28:13]
Giannis Papas
It was a week.
- [28:14]
Vito
It was a week. I do go through phases.
- [28:16]
Giannis Papas
But you announced them. You texted me, you said you called somebody a cool cat. And then you said, by the way, I'm going to be calling people cats for the next few months. I really like it.
- [28:25]
Vito
Yeah, it's just how I roll.
- [28:26]
Giannis Papas
Cuz you met somebody who was calling people Cats.
- [28:28]
Vito
Who was I. Who was calling everyone a cool cat?
- [28:30]
Giannis Papas
Was it you were in? It was. It was one of the cities you're on the road in.
- [28:34]
Vito
It was like, that's a cool cat. That's my kind of cat. I forgot somebody was calling everybody cool cat. Okay, so you ready for this? Manhattan, Balados, Houston Street. Okay. Staten Island. Don Cheech on Bay street in Staten Island. Don Cheech, you ready for this? Not only do they have amazing Italian food, your classic Italian dishes, classic Italian desserts, great wine, great pasta. You know what they have that is out of control. Good. You ready for this? Which you do not ever expect this from an Italian restaurant. Salmon. Don Cheech's Salmon in from stat on Staten island on Bay street is next level. Don Cheech. I love this place. Don Cheech. Staten Island, Balatos. New York City. Manhattan, Queens. Ready for this one? Queens. I'm going to say it's a tie between my local pizzeria and Italian restaurant, Joe and John's. I love Joe and John's. That's. I can't even. I can't even front. It's my favorite food, but it's an actual tie between Joe and John's and Barros's Barossas on Woodhaven Boulevard. Unbelievable. Go get the stuffed pepper. They have a stuffed pepper there that they put, like, sausage in and, like, cheese. Dude. Barosas on Woodhaven Boulevard. Unbelievable. Okay, so we got Queens, Barossas and Joe and John's. We got Staten Island, Don Cheech. We got Barossas. I'm sorry. We got Bellottos. I'm drunk. We got Balados in Manhattan.
- [30:17]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [30:18]
Vito
Brooklyn.
- [30:19]
Giannis Papas
Brooklyn. We need Brooklyn in the Bronx.
- [30:21]
Vito
Okay, Brooklyn, Obviously, it's Lucali's. There's no real kind of. There's no debating that. Lucali's is the best pizza and Italian food. But they only really. They only do pizza and calzones. But it. It's. It's not debatable.
- [30:35]
Giannis Papas
It's a pizza list or a restaurant.
- [30:37]
Vito
That's the thing. It's not. It's not debatable how good it is. It's not. The thing is, for me, when I say good Italian restaurant, the ant. The truth is I can only go Italian food. It's just. What? I mean, let's be honest, folks, and I'm just going to be fully honest with you. I respect other countries cuisines just like I respect other countries and other states. The truth is, nobody matters and nobody cares unless it's Italian food. In New York City, you only get Italian you really.
- [31:03]
Giannis Papas
When we're looking for a place to eat, you're Most of the time, you're going to lean Italian, dude.
- [31:07]
Vito
It's just nobody really cares if it's not New York and it's not Italian. It's just. I know people play pretend, like, oh, there's a good restaurant in Baltimore. It's like, okay, fine. Everything's just being compared to Italian New York food. By the way, there is a great restaurant in Baltimore, an Italian restaurant that Stavro sent me to that was fantastic, and it was awesome food. But it's like, you got to know.
- [31:29]
Giannis Papas
People if you're going to go somewhere. Like, Jimmy Kimmel brought you to, like, good places in, like, L. A And Vegas.
- [31:32]
Vito
Oh, dude, the pizza. The Italian food and pizza in Phoenix at Pizzeria Bianco in Phoenix, some of the best pizza you'll ever have in your life. Good luck getting in. You got to know. You got to know people to get in, because the lines around the block, because the food's fantastic. But New York City, let's be honest. Every other restaurant I just mentioned, they'll. They'll. They're only good because the people came from New York City. The people own Pizzeria Bianco from New York. It's what it is. Brooklyn. Lucalis. Okay, But I understand what you're saying. If we're talking about restaurants and we want to get. Want to open it up a little bit more. All right, I just.
- [32:10]
Giannis Papas
You can say Italian, but you're just saying pizza places right now.
- [32:15]
Vito
Joe and John's has more than pizza. They make pasta. They make garlic knots. They make spinach rolls.
- [32:19]
Giannis Papas
That's. That's mostly pizzerias. That's what they serve.
- [32:22]
Vito
Okay? Barosa does a whole thing, a whole array of. I just told you. They have stuffed sausage and peppers or stuffed peppers.
- [32:29]
Unknown
This message is sponsored by Greenlight. We all know the old saying about teaching a man to fish. And as parents, we want our kids to learn the things that will set them up for success. So this holiday season, give kids money skills that last well beyond 2024 with green light. Greenlight is a debit card and money app made for families where kids learn how to save, invest, and spend wisely with parental controls built in. Sign up today at greenlight.com Spotify greenlight.com Spotify Hablas Espanol spries Du dzoich.
- [33:01]
Vito
Com Le nosq If you've heard that.
- [33:03]
Unknown
Sound from Babbel before, I bet you do. Babbel is the science backed language learning app that actually works with quick 10 minute lessons. Handcrafted by over 200 language experts, Babbel gets you on your way to speaking a new language in just a few weeks. With over 16 million subscriptions sold and a 20 day money back guarantee. Just start speaking another language with Babel right now. Up to 55% off your Babel subscription at babbel.com Spotify podcast spelled B A B E L.com Spotify podcast rules and restrictions may apply.
- [33:30]
Vito
Stuff.
- [33:31]
Giannis Papas
Stuff. Clams you said.
- [33:32]
Vito
I thought, yeah. And then the owner, one time I was there and the owner said, he didn't say, can you take a picture of my daughter? He said, you're going to take a picture of my daughter. I've never heard that from somebody before. He didn't, he didn't form it as a question. He formed it as a statement. So I just took a picture with his daughter and that was fun and it was a great, great meal.
- [33:54]
Giannis Papas
Bronx.
- [33:55]
Vito
Okay, but wait, there's more because locales is amazing in Brooklyn. But I also got to give another shout out to this place is not a restaurant. But we're just talking about food. I didn't say restaurant. I said best food. Or if I did say best restaurant, then just edit it out and make me in. I say that. I said best food. Anthony and Son Panini shop in on Graham Avenue. I want to say that's Williamsburg. Unbelievable. They got a sandwich there. Chicken cutlet, vodka sauce, mozzarella sticks. Okay. They have an ice cream cappuccino that they give you. That's next level. Anthony and Son Panini shop. The kids, Sabino who run New York Nico. All those growing up Italian. You know that podcast, that's the, that's, that's where they, they used to do it out of there. I'm not sure they do it out of there anymore. But that's basically.
- [34:50]
Giannis Papas
Oh, that's the shop that they record the show in.
- [34:52]
Vito
Anthony and Son Panini shop. That is worth. I just touched an elf.
- [34:57]
Giannis Papas
You're allowed to.
- [34:58]
Vito
No, no. You know, but the rules. You cannot touch these elves.
- [35:00]
Giannis Papas
No, I thought you can. The kids can't.
- [35:02]
Vito
No, I can't because I move them. But if the kids, if the kids touch the elf.
- [35:06]
Giannis Papas
They told me, they told me that you can touch it.
- [35:09]
Vito
I can touch it?
- [35:10]
Giannis Papas
Yeah, because I, because I touch it. Dude.
- [35:11]
Vito
I bring that thing into the sauna. That's why it's always sticky in the morning.
- [35:14]
Giannis Papas
She accused me of touching one.
- [35:16]
Vito
Yeah.
- [35:17]
Giannis Papas
And I said I didn't. And she was like, but it's okay, you can touch it. Adults are fine.
- [35:21]
Vito
Yeah, yeah.
- [35:22]
Giannis Papas
And then I told her that one of them burned somebody on the train.
- [35:25]
Vito
Yeah, well, I heard my daughter say the other day to my STEPSON Tristan, who's 14, she goes, he was talking about how like, you know, he was getting yelled at. He gets yelled at every day. Every day his mom yell. I just. He's a 14 year old boy. They just get. That's just like the most times I've ever been yelled at in my life has been by my mom when I was 14.
- [35:44]
Giannis Papas
All you want to do is lock the door and get to work.
- [35:46]
Vito
That's it, baby. That's all I'm just. Literally, that's what I'm putting it. Where each kid is going to get something in their stocking. I'm going to put a little clear earrings and Delilah's, a little chocolate bar and violets. I'm going to put a tub of Vaseline in Tristan's because I just know what's up. So, so, so, so, so, so. But she said to him the other day, my daughter, he was acting, whatever. And she was like, oh, cuz. Jasmine was like, you know, you know, you think, you think you're a man, Tris. Like, you know, like, you know, acting like a man, talking back to me. Go to your room. You're like a little kid. Whatever. She was. And then Delilah goes, yeah, you think you're a man. You can't even move the elves. Only a man can touch the elves. And we were like, hey, you shut your mouth. She was like, she was like, if you were man, you could touch the elf. To my daughters. That's how they, that's how they designate adults.
- [36:47]
Giannis Papas
Dude, she was telling me the things that the elves have gotten into this.
- [36:50]
Vito
Year, dude, they've been wild this year.
- [36:52]
Giannis Papas
Told me they wrecked the tree.
- [36:53]
Vito
Dude, they threw toilet paper all over the Christmas tree.
- [36:55]
Giannis Papas
They threw toilet paper all over the Christmas tree. They threw ornaments all over the place.
- [36:59]
Vito
Yep.
- [36:59]
Giannis Papas
They were swinging on the fan one.
- [37:00]
Vito
Day, they said, yep. One of them tweeted the N word. No. Yeah. Oh my God. This one, dude, he's a.
- [37:12]
Giannis Papas
Which one convince you to move back to Staten Island?
- [37:14]
Vito
This one, this one. This girl, she's, she's, you know, she showed me that ass. This one is a fat ass, bro. But dude, the kid. These, these elves are. You gotta. Dude. And there's a lot of times where it's like, where it's like, it's like 3:00 in the morning and Jazz will wake up and go, oh.
- [37:34]
Unknown
She'll go.
- [37:35]
Vito
I'll say, what happened? She'll go, we didn't move the elves. And I'm like. And then. So one of us has to go down, usually her, because I'm scared of the dark.
- [37:44]
Giannis Papas
And goggles, though.
- [37:47]
Vito
That's true. That's true, bro. My new house. I'm gonna need them. I'm gonna need night vision goggles.
- [37:53]
Giannis Papas
You're gonna get a gun.
- [37:54]
Vito
I have to get a gun. I'm gonna have to get a gun.
- [37:56]
Giannis Papas
I'm so nervous.
- [37:58]
Vito
There's Japanese knotweed on the property. How do we get. If you're a landscaper out there, tell me before I sign this contract, is Japanese knotweed a big problem? And if you're a fan of the show, can you help me with Japanese knotweed?
- [38:12]
Giannis Papas
Dude, I gotta. I gotta. I got a message from a fan.
- [38:14]
Vito
Tell. Tell me.
- [38:15]
Giannis Papas
All right.
- [38:16]
Vito
Tell me.
- [38:16]
Giannis Papas
I gotta pull it up. I meant to send it to you.
- [38:18]
Vito
All right.
- [38:19]
Giannis Papas
Because this is. This is a. This is an offer.
- [38:22]
Vito
We got an offer.
- [38:23]
Giannis Papas
We got in a wild offer of something that.
- [38:26]
Vito
Love it.
- [38:27]
Giannis Papas
I did not expect somebody.
- [38:28]
Vito
I need offers right now. I have no money.
- [38:31]
Giannis Papas
Dude, you're. You're. Man, the Bills Buffalo.
- [38:34]
Vito
Dude, I might honestly have to. I might have to back out of this. I might have to have a lawyer talk to reach out to John. I don't know that I could afford this.
- [38:44]
Giannis Papas
This is. You did this.
- [38:45]
Vito
I did do this. Should I just go with him, though, and just, like, try to do a show around it or something?
- [38:50]
Giannis Papas
That would be smart. I mean, the Super Bowls in New Orleans, right?
- [38:54]
Vito
Try to, like, recoup the money somehow.
- [38:55]
Giannis Papas
Dude, if you did a show. If you did a show in New Orleans and you literally called it. If you did a live show in New Orleans, you could do stand up, but also, like, have an aspect of it that's a meet and greet called the. I promised my producer I'd send it to the super bowl show.
- [39:10]
Vito
Yeah, like a pop up last minute. Like, just get me a guarantee. Yeah, just. Just let me do this.
- [39:18]
Giannis Papas
So I. I can't find it, but basically somebody. Oh, here it is. Hey, Vito. Just saw the latest episode of Chrissy Chaos Pod. If Giannis. Chrissy D. And you want to do an episode down here in Charlotte, and I can put y'all up in a hotel. I'm currently living in Monk's Corner, South Carolina, about 45 minutes northwest of Charlotte.
- [39:35]
Vito
My daughter, you retard.
- [39:37]
Giannis Papas
My daughter is living on Long island with my ex and I visit her one weekend a month, so I have a ton of Marriott Bonvoy points also.
- [39:45]
Vito
Hell yeah. Let's pick him up on it.
- [39:47]
Giannis Papas
He's saying he'll put us up at.
- [39:48]
Vito
A Marriott, I guess in Charleston. Yeah, ask him what's the drive from Charleston to New Orleans, because maybe I can get away with it by putting John in that hotel and save on that. Oh, no, but did I also. I already told John a 50 mile radius. Right?
- [40:03]
Giannis Papas
Let's see, let's see how you know what?
- [40:05]
Vito
John should hope that I'm the one that goes. Because then I'll. We'll stay in and I, I'm not. I'll. I'll try to fucking use my points to get us in a nice hotel. I just have points.
- [40:15]
Giannis Papas
You already promised in points.
- [40:19]
Vito
What's the best bet? Should I just book the hotels and flights now before it gets crazy?
- [40:24]
Giannis Papas
No, but then if the Super Bowl's happening regardless.
- [40:27]
Vito
So the flights and hotels are the same price.
- [40:29]
Giannis Papas
They're going to be the same no matter what. It's a 14 hour drive from, from Charleston, Virginia to Charleston.
- [40:39]
Vito
No, South Carolina.
- [40:40]
Giannis Papas
Oh, Charleston, South Carolina.
- [40:41]
Vito
Imagine he's talking about like Charleston, West Virginia. Like Jill. Charleston, West Virginia. Charleston is the capital of west Virginia.
- [40:48]
Giannis Papas
It's 11 hours.
- [40:49]
Vito
Okay.
- [40:50]
Giannis Papas
And I think you said 50 miles. This is 762.
- [40:53]
Vito
Yeah. So then I, Yeah, I'm. What is. Can you ask Chat GPT what's the rough cost of super bowl tickets in New Orleans? How much is it going to cost me? Flight, hotel, super. Two Super bowl tickets, Super Bowl 2025, New Orleans, Louisiana. Dude, I've been talking to ChatGPT like it's my baby mama.
- [41:20]
Giannis Papas
Do you remember, do you remember AOL Instant Messenger?
- [41:23]
Vito
Yeah.
- [41:23]
Giannis Papas
Do you remember Smarter Child?
- [41:25]
Vito
No.
- [41:25]
Giannis Papas
It was like one of the first chat bots that you talked to that would just give you like generic replies.
- [41:30]
Vito
Okay, so, dude, by the way, this is chat GPT101. Like the things that chat GPT and AI is going to be able to do in the next two to three years is going to be mind blowing. But I did ask Chat GPT will comedians become irrelevant? And Chat GPT said no, because human nuance has not been figured out yet by AI.
- [41:49]
Giannis Papas
Any class you want on plane, just regular.
- [41:52]
Vito
Just say. Let's just say generic because I'm not. Yeah, I can't buy this house I'm trying to buy. And also get John a first class plane ticket. Two plane ticket, dudes. Let's see tds. All right, Chat GPT Serving it up, planning a trip from Queens, New York.
- [42:17]
Giannis Papas
I didn't even put in Queens, New York.
- [42:19]
Vito
That's wild. Okay, $15,000. $15,000.
- [42:35]
Giannis Papas
You promised John $15,000.
- [42:39]
Vito
How do we sabotage the bills right now?
- [42:41]
Giannis Papas
Or you know what you should do? You should call John right now and maybe you could offer him a buyout. Like this is like a sports betting website.
- [42:49]
Vito
Let's call him out. Okay. Because he was at the game yesterday.
- [42:53]
Giannis Papas
He was. But before you call him, you got to come up. What's your buyout gonna be?
- [42:57]
Vito
Five, eight grand.
- [42:59]
Giannis Papas
Don't. Dude, he's gonna take the eight grand. Don't offer him eight grand. I think you could go lower.
- [43:03]
Vito
Two, three grand.
- [43:05]
Giannis Papas
I bet you if you said to him two grand right now. No super bowl on the table.
- [43:09]
Vito
All right, here we go. Calling John the father Grady, who was at the Buffalo Bills game last night.
- [43:16]
Giannis Papas
Sitting on the 50 yard line because his dad's a ticket snobby.
- [43:20]
Vito
Yeah.
- [43:21]
F
Yo, what's up, Chris?
- [43:22]
Vito
J.G. what's up? You're live on the Chrissy Chaos podcast. Yeah.
- [43:26]
F
What's up?
- [43:26]
Vito
What's up? What's up? This is John Grady, everyone. He, he, he. John the father Grady who?
- [43:31]
Giannis Papas
The loudest he's ever spoken on the podcast.
- [43:33]
Vito
Loudest he's ever spoken on the podcast. He was at the Buffalo Bills game last night freezing his nuts off. They won by the skin of their teeth against the New England Patriots sitting at the 50 yard line with goggles on because his dad's a ticket snob. We have an offer for you on the table. You ready for this? Let me hear it. How about this? You know, we had a bet that the Buffalo Bills were going to go to the Super Bowl. And I said if they go to the Super Bowl, I was going to pay for you. I was going to get you two super bowl tickets, plus round trip airfare, plus a hotel within a 50 mile radius. Do you recall me saying this? Okay.
- [44:09]
F
Yes, of course.
- [44:10]
Vito
Well, we are prepared to offer you right now here on the Chrissy Chaos show is a buyout. Is a buyout of that bet for you. Ready for this? $1,750. 1750 right now. You're bought out. I'm bought out of that bet. You get 1750 Venmo to you right now. And I am out of that bet.
- [44:33]
F
I don't know. I decline.
- [44:37]
Vito
Wow. His kid just declined. So you are declining my buyout offer?
- [44:45]
F
I believe. I believe.
- [44:46]
Giannis Papas
Are you gonna tell them how much you found out it's worth?
- [44:49]
Vito
Yes, because we just chat GPT at my friend. And this is looking like a fifteen thousand dollar all in fucking extravaganza, folks.
- [44:57]
F
And they got a long way to go before they get there.
- [45:02]
Vito
All right, here's the thing. I'm amending. I'm amending the bet a little bit. It's still on the table. Everything still on the table. However, a bet.
- [45:09]
Giannis Papas
Dude, you just made an offer.
- [45:10]
Vito
All right, an offer. I'm saying though, if this happens, though, I'm coming with. It's going to be me and you.
- [45:15]
F
Deal?
- [45:16]
Vito
Deal's a deal. Fine. Deal's a deal. All right, fine, fine, fine.
- [45:19]
F
Why don't we. Why don't you hit up lil Mozzarella asking for the goods?
- [45:22]
Vito
I seriously should. Little Mozzarella gets to fly private to every game.
- [45:26]
F
Sure, he was at the. The game last night.
- [45:28]
Vito
I'm. Oh, I'm sure he was. All right. Where are you still driving back from Buffalo?
- [45:33]
F
No, I'm back in Poughkeepsie now. I'm at my parents house.
- [45:36]
Vito
Poughkeepsie, where you're from?
- [45:37]
F
Yes, that is exactly where I'm from. Getting ready for Christmas?
- [45:41]
Vito
Hell yeah, dude. All right. Vito's. Vito's drunk on the podcast. That's easy. That's the kind of guys I got working with me. I got one guy who doesn't show up and then one guy who's just drunk at work. Okay. All right. Damn, dude. All right, Poppy. So you. You've. You've officially declined the buyout live on the show?
- [46:04]
F
Absolutely. No, I'm, you know, I'm in this thing.
- [46:06]
Vito
Wow.
- [46:07]
F
I'm. I'm psyched. All right, But I don't know though, because they said Josh Allen has a broken hand.
- [46:12]
Vito
No, no, stop. Did they really say that?
- [46:14]
F
Yeah, apparently he's been playing with it for a little while, so.
- [46:18]
Vito
Dude, his hand did not look good last night. He couldn't even really get a grip on the ball.
- [46:22]
F
Yeah, they said that post game he like banged his funny bone and he was like completely numb for like 15 minutes. Plus, you know, the temperature where, you know, you can already feel your extremities that. Well, anyways.
- [46:34]
Vito
All right, dude. Well, I mean, if Josh Allen has a broken hand, I'm really feeling confident right now. I'm feeling so good up at the four tickets. You know what, dude? Yeah, dude, I'm gonna go. Veto said to up it to four tickets. Now I'm up at the four tickets. Private chat. Who's the backup? Oh, isn't it Tyrod Taylor? I thought the Bill's backup was Tyrod. Or maybe. Maybe it's the backup for the Jets.
- [47:04]
F
It's not Teddy Bravewater?
- [47:06]
Giannis Papas
Mitchell Trubisky.
- [47:08]
Vito
Oh, Trubinsky. Trubisky from the Bears. Yeah. Okay.
- [47:10]
F
Yeah.
- [47:11]
Vito
So is. Is Josh Allen ruled out for next week or. They haven't said that yet. No, no, no.
- [47:15]
F
I think he's gonna continue to play through it.
- [47:16]
Giannis Papas
I mean, they said he's been playing with it all year, hopefully.
- [47:19]
F
Bully. And then I. If they. If the Chiefs don't lose this week, then they'll probably use the last week, this season as a bye week, so.
- [47:26]
Vito
Yeah, because. Because what's. As it stands right now, are they in first or the Chiefs are in first?
- [47:31]
F
Chiefs are in first. Their only losses to the Bills, so.
- [47:35]
Vito
Interesting.
- [47:35]
F
They gotta lose. They gotta lose the next two. Bill's gotta win the next two, then they have the tiebreaker. They'll have the same record.
- [47:42]
Vito
But the top two AFC teams get a buy, right? Or just the top one?
- [47:48]
F
I think it's the top two, I'm pretty sure.
- [47:50]
Vito
So the Bills are in line for a buy right now? Yeah.
- [47:54]
F
Who gets with the NFL? I. Yeah, no, I'm like, 90. Sure. It's supposed to. Oh, wait, no, it's just that. No, it's a top. It's the top one. No, no, it's the top two.
- [48:01]
Vito
Okay. No, no, no.
- [48:02]
F
It was the top two. Now it's the top.
- [48:04]
Vito
Dude, am I talking to your brother or you? Are you still. You're stimming out right now.
- [48:10]
F
No, no, I had to recall for a second.
- [48:14]
Vito
All right, all right, I'll let you go. That was John Grady officially. Officially declining the Chrissy Chaos offer. Yep.
- [48:21]
F
Absolutely. But, yo, if I don't talk to you. Merry Christmas, brother.
- [48:24]
Vito
Merry Christmas, puppy. All right, man. Later, dude. Later. John the father Grady.
- [48:30]
Giannis Papas
You almost got out of it.
- [48:31]
Vito
Almost got out of it. I mean, if Josh Allen's hand is broken, though, we are gonna. We're. Dude, we are so good. Let's hope Joe Rogan show is out right now.
- [48:44]
Giannis Papas
Well, we can just save that for the next episode because we should wrap this one up soon anyway.
- [48:47]
Vito
Okay, let's wrap it up. And I want to. Yeah. I'm going to tell you on the next week's episode, All About Joe Rogan, because it was. Let me tell you. Here's the thing with Joe Rogan is it's difficult to be in the moment, like in the chair doing. Me and Giannis had some swings at jokes. Like, dude, Giannis made a Wegovy Joke that, like, bombed so hard that, like, I had to bring it up and be like, that bombed hard. And then Joe was like, yeah, man, yeah. And then. And then I swung with a joke, like, doing, like, a full Korean accent that, like, just bombed, like, sweat dripping down my back. And Giannis was, like, kicking me under the table, like, dying, laughing, like we were bought, like, bombing. But at the end, I said, you know, Joe was like, I'm so happy to see History Hyenas back. Joe's actually said. He goes, it's one of my favorite podcasts. I was like, oh, wow, thanks. And then he go. And I said, you know what? We're happy to have it back. I said, you know anyone out there? You know, you're listening to us on YouTube right now. We've been demonetized on YouTube. We don't know why we're trying to fight. We only can have another chance to get reinstated come this February. So we have to stay within the lines and really kind of just be goody two shoes and not give you the comedy that you deserve, because we want to get re monetized on YouTube. So if you want to see the comedy you deserve and us going absolutely wild as vintage history hyenas, you got to go to patreon.com history hyenas. And Joe was like, now, that's a great promo. He was like, that's going to make me sign up. And I was like, do it, bubba. Do a bitch.
- [50:27]
Giannis Papas
So did you guys. We could just talk about hyenas on this episode at this point? Did you. I mean, about Rogan on this episode. Did you guys talk, like. Did you guys talk about, like, why you got back together?
- [50:39]
Vito
No. So it was interesting. That's what we love about Joe Rogan and why he's just a G is because he wasn't interested in that. He wasn't interested in what? Tell us what happened. He's not, like, his show is not about drama. He's not Wendy Williams. He was like, I'm trying. He was like, I just start. He started just talking to us about history and all that. And then at the end, he just said, I'm just happy you guys are back. He didn't mention anything about the drama, that he's not interested in it. He's, like, above it.
- [51:07]
Giannis Papas
Yeah.
- [51:07]
Vito
You know, which we really respected. We did three and a half hours with him. Not all we were doing was being funny, like, or trying to be funny and bombing, you know, and we talked about all different kinds of things, man. You know, it was like, a clan. It was like a vintage Joe Rogan episode. He's Joe Rogan. Really is the man. Like, what is awesome about Joe is to get a guy in such a high position in comedy and just in the world who literally is, like, comic first. Like, he is so pro comedian and so all about comedians and absolutely never forgot where he came from. So it's like, you don't meet many people like that. So, like, comedians that talk shit about Joe Rogan, it's just because they don't do a show and they don't know him. You know what I mean? That's what it is. It's like you don't know the guy. The guy's fantastic. I love you, Joe Rogan. Cheers to you. Cheers to you, my friend. You think I'm drunk? Cheers to you, baby. My kids coming down my. Sometimes I'll be. I'll say to Jazz, because I got two daughters. I'll just say to Jazz, she'll be like, cooking. I'll say, you gonna give me my son? You gonna give me a son?
- [52:17]
Giannis Papas
Wish everybody Merry Christmas and wrap up the this episode.
- [52:19]
Vito
Merry Christmas. Happy Kwanza. Happy New Year. Happy Hanukkah. Happy January 6th. Happy. We'll see you later. Hunter Biden.