← Chris Distefano Presents: Chrissy Chaos
Chris Distefano Presents: Chrissy Chaos
What Movie Did Chris Get SCREWED Out Of?!?! | Chris Distefano is Chrissy Chaos
00:51:47
Loading summary
Transcript331 lines
- [00:00]
Chris DiStefano
This cold and flu season, Instacart is here to help deliver all of your sick day essentials. Whether you're in prevention mode and need vitamins, hand sanitizer, and that lemon tea your Nana swears by, or you're in healing mode and need medicine, soup, and a lot more tissues, simply download the Instacart app to get sick day supplies that reinvigorate or relieve. Delivered in as fast as 30 minutes. Plus enjoy. Zero delivery fees on your first three orders. Excludes restaurant orders, service fees and terms apply. What's up, everybody? Welcome to another episode of Chrissy Chaos. I just want to give a quick congratulations to the Philadelphia Eagles. Super bowl champion Saquon Barkley rushed for 150 yards, three touchdowns. Super Bowl MVP. What a great game. It was awesome to. To see how close that was. 21:18 Philadelphia Eagles over the Kansas City Chiefs. Just want to say congrats and Philly, I hope your city doesn't burn down because that's usually what you do after you win Super Bowls. You burn your city down like it's Gaza. Guys, just want to give a quick congratulations to the Kansas City Chiefs. I mean, the three Pete. Unbelievable. Travis Kelsey, sponsored by Pfizer, won somehow the NFL mvp. Three touchdowns. No one thought it was coming. No one saw that coming. And yet a great win. 21:18 Chachi PT said that that's what's going was going to happen when we asked it a few weeks ago. I just want to. I just want to give quick congrats to the Chiefs, but I got to be honest with you. Three Super Bowls in a row is enough. It's boring now. Nobody's watching the. No, I'm not going to watch football anymore if you guys keep winning. And Patrick Mahomes, are you white or black? You have to pick a side. All right, so that's it. And yeah, dude, listen, here's the truth. First of all, look at this. You're ever charge your water dude, you know about this? No, I got this. I got.
- [01:54]
Giannis Pappas
Is that reverse osmosis?
- [01:55]
Chris DiStefano
I think I got sucked into an. An Instagram ad when I was in Florida and I just bought this. Dude. I bought it from this guy, Gary Breca from Echo Go plus. This is not. We're not like. This is not a. They don't sponsor us or anything. But I love it and I literally bought it. I'm not even kidding. I bought this on a Sunday. And then on Monday, he announced on his Instagram that he sold the company and he's no longer a Part of this. And I only bought it because he was involved, but yes, supposedly it like, supercharges your water.
- [02:25]
Giannis Pappas
That's nice.
- [02:26]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah. I don't know what that means. Yeah, but buck ass naked, Bianca. Oh, wow. They leaked. They leaked. The un.
- [02:33]
Giannis Pappas
What do you mean leaked?
- [02:34]
Chris DiStefano
She was.
- [02:34]
Giannis Pappas
She was.
- [02:35]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, but I saw that it was always blurred out. Oh, hell no.
- [02:38]
Giannis Pappas
No.
- [02:39]
Chris DiStefano
Where did you see the ones not blurred out Immediately?
- [02:41]
Unknown
On Twitter. Five minutes after happen.
- [02:43]
Chris DiStefano
Really? Yeah. Damn, I ain't looking. Yeah, she's dope. She was butt ass naked. I gotta be. Yeah, naturals. Really?
- [02:51]
Unknown
I'm pretty sure.
- [02:51]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah. Interesting. Yeah, she. I gotta be honest, though. It's a little too much now. Like, don't you kind of feel like a little bit like, where it's like. Stop. People.
- [03:00]
Unknown
People were saying it's like a humiliation kink type thing.
- [03:03]
Chris DiStefano
That's what I thought. Because she looked like she was humiliated when she looked at my man Yeezy. Yeah, I don't. I don't know. But obviously you guys have been asking and will I wear something like that to Madison Square Garden? And I will. I will. I'll come out butt ass knackered. Thank you for everyone. By the way, who's been buying tickets@chrisd comedy.com I'm headlining Madison Square Garden September 11, 2025. So it's. It's pretty dope. Tickets are on sale fully right now to the general public, September 11, 2025. I've only ever had one goal in stand up comedy, and that's to do Madison Square Garden. So please be there. What we are gonna do is I just want everyone from the original 13 colonies in that. So just everyone, if you're A true American, 1776, come through. Even if you're not a true American, just come through, dude. Just bring everyone you've ever met, ever, and we're gonna do the show. I'm excited about it. I'm nervous about it. Because here's the thing with the Garden is somebody was asking me yesterday, like, why are you even doing that? Because the truth is that. You want to know the truth? The truth is I'm not. I have no business doing the Garden. The truth is I probably could have just done the Beacon and done a couple of shows at the Beacon and that would have been great. But the Garden is just like such a dream that I just want to be able to do this once. And to do it on September 11, I think is kind of just, you know, not funny. But it's just like, you know, I'm I'm 911 dad guy. So you know, like my whole lot, my whole career started after the 911 bit. So I'm like, why not, you know, close out the chapter and just do comedy on 911 at the Garden.
- [04:45]
Giannis Pappas
Have you done like, have you opened or been performed at an arena before?
- [04:50]
Chris DiStefano
Yes, so I've done an arena. I've done an arena twice.
- [04:52]
Giannis Pappas
Well, you did the Garden.
- [04:54]
Chris DiStefano
What? Madison Square Garden? Yeah.
- [04:56]
Giannis Pappas
No, Garden of Laughs.
- [04:58]
Chris DiStefano
But that was the theater.
- [04:59]
Giannis Pappas
That was the actual Garden.
- [05:00]
Chris DiStefano
No, assume that was the Garden. And that's what I think a lot of people. So, so here's why, here's why I fucked up and here's why I do have to give a shout out to Andrew because he did tell me this two years ago and I didn't listen. He was like, because I did Radio City and it sold out. And he was like, dude, I'm telling you, just add another show at Radio City. I was like, I want to do something different. I want to do the theater at Madison Square Garden. He was like, dude, that's like the baby Garden. He's like, why would you do that? You haven't done Madison Square Garden yet. And I was like. I was like, yeah, but I just want to do something different. He was like, yeah, but then everyone. He was like, you know how people are. They're going to think that you did the Garden. Then he was like, then when you actually do the Garden, people back, oh, he did the Garden. I was there. Cuz they don't understand that you're doing the arena at Madison Square Garden, not the theater. He was like, so you, you and I. And I was like, nah, don't worry about it. And then like I did those shows, I got paid good money. I was like, he don't know. And now I'm sitting here today looking at all the comments be like, didn't you do that already? Didn't you do that last year? And I'm like, damn. Schultz was right. I.
- [05:57]
Giannis Pappas
But see, I knew that obviously I knew you did the theater, but I always thought Garden of Laughs. No was like. Because like they have such, it's like such heavy hitters.
- [06:05]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, but you know what it is for stand up comedy, the theater at Madison Square garden is like 5,500 seats. So like that's better than like the arena is obviously 15,000 by the way. I can't believe I have to somehow sell 15,000 tickets in New York. So we're just going to have to figure out a way to do this. But we are going to do this, baby.
- [06:24]
Giannis Pappas
So what two arenas have you done?
- [06:26]
Chris DiStefano
I've done the TD Garden in Boston twice. Because I did. There's. Dennis Leary has a comedy show there called Comics Come Home, and it's. It's a cancer benefit with Cam Neely. And so I've done that. I've done that. I did that in 2016, and then I did it in 2022, and then when I did it in 2022, there was, like, this whole thing planned like we were gonna. You know, we did. The guard, did TD Garden. It was dope. Oh, my. My water just. My water's ready. Supercharged. Just beep. So I think it's hydrogen water is what it is. Let me take a sip. Tastes like hydrogen. So. So I. So I did that. I did the TD Garden, and I had a, you know, pretty decent set of. John Mulaney was the headliner. And then I caught norovirus actively. Like, I did. My set felt great. And then the. And then I caught. The neural virus came into my system within, like, minutes of me getting on stage. And I. I couldn't go out and celebrate with them. I vomited in my hotel room in Boston all night. Like, I'm talking about all night. Just vomiting the whole way. And. And, yeah, I just got fucking clipped. Have you boys been clipped with norovirus yet at all?
- [07:42]
Giannis Pappas
I got it two years ago.
- [07:43]
Chris DiStefano
So did I. I got it a year and a half ago when I. When I did the table read for Kind of Pregnant. When they cut me after I did table Read.
- [07:49]
Giannis Pappas
Oh, this is the movie.
- [07:50]
Chris DiStefano
This movie I got cut from Kind of Pregnant, which is on Netflix. You. Those.
- [07:54]
Giannis Pappas
Do you know who got your part?
- [07:57]
Chris DiStefano
I don't. I don't. I actually don't know who got my part. I just know that I came in and read for it.
- [08:04]
Giannis Pappas
Okay, so wait, what part did you have? Because then we could just. We could just.
- [08:07]
Chris DiStefano
So there's a part. My part. My. My character's name was Ron R. A W N. And it was like a. I was like, a New Jersey Devils fan. And then I was a New Jersey Devils fan.
- [08:21]
Giannis Pappas
Oh, I. I have. Who? I have. Who?
- [08:22]
Chris DiStefano
Who? Who was it?
- [08:23]
Giannis Pappas
Alex Moffat from snl.
- [08:25]
Chris DiStefano
There we go. Alex Moffat. What was his part? Has anyone seen the movie yet? Is it out yet?
- [08:31]
Giannis Pappas
I think I know the premiere was. I saw Hannah Burner went to the premiere.
- [08:35]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, I got invited, but February 5th.
- [08:37]
Giannis Pappas
So it comes out today.
- [08:38]
Chris DiStefano
I was like, oh. Oh, yeah. February 5th. Yes. Right. Well, tech. No, it's February. What's Monday.
- [08:43]
Giannis Pappas
Super Bowl Monday, February 10th.
- [08:47]
Chris DiStefano
It's February. It is. It's February 10th.
- [08:49]
Giannis Pappas
Today it's, oh, happy birthday to my wife.
- [08:53]
Chris DiStefano
Oh, yeah. Happy birthday, Allah. That sounds funny. Just that out of context. Happy birthday, Allah. Allah. So, okay, so February 5th. Yeah, it's coming out. So what happened was in this movie, kind of pregnant is I. I got asked to do come in for an audition for one. It was like one or two lines, right? But I did it. They don't give me the part, which is okay. It happens. I've been on many.
- [09:24]
Giannis Pappas
You did multiple table reads, though.
- [09:25]
Chris DiStefano
Well, that's what I'm gonna get to. Yeah. So I've done. You know, this shit's a 95% plus fail rate in this business. So I. I do the table read, right? And I'm sorry, I do the audition, and then they asked me to come in. They asked me then to do a table read on Zoom. So now I'm on Zoom for two and a half hours. I'll never forget my boys. Rat O'Neill's in Queens. We're watching a. It was like an NFL playoff game. We're watching it, and I'm on in. In my car taking a Zoom for, like, two lines. So I'm in a full table read for two hours. I for Zoom for two lines. I do it. Whatever my agent calls me, they're like, look, the actual, like, official table read. The actual official table read is next week. You don't have an offer yet for the part, which, like, we never like doing this. Like, we say if. If you want him or any of our actors or actresses to go to the table read, like, they need to have, like, a secure role. Like, you need to have give offer them something. But they're like, you know, it's Amy Schumer. So, like, she's a fellow comic, you know, like, it's all good. Everything's gonna work out. So I'm like, I'll go do the table read. And as I'm on my way to the table read, I start to get that norovirus. Like, I feel it, like, bubbling up in the Uber. The table read was in Brooklyn. So I'm in doing Uber and going. And I'm like, good. I know that I have it because everyone in my family had it. It was like R through the. The Northeast last year at this time. So everyone in my family had it, like, taking everyone down one by one by one. So I get it. And I'm, like, literally holding in, like, the most insane, like, you know, like, when you have, like, it's such an uncomfortable feeling to, like, just feel like you're going to puke and like, there's nothing you can do until you puke and you just feel awful. You're trying to, like, hold it back. And I'm trying to take, like, little, little small sips of, like, ginger ale. And I'm just literally being like, dude, just get through these next two hours. This is like, just do it. Adam Sandler's, like, nephew is the. The director. You know, Damon Wayans is there and Will. Will Forte is there. He's. He was the lead. He's great. Will Forte is the man. And because I was sitting next to him and he told me before, he's like, dude, you don't look good. And I was like, I know, man. I was like, I'm not feeling great. And he was like, all right, buddy, you just get through this. And so I do another two hour table read. When I did the one on Zoom, I had like, four lines. It literally. Literally this sat there for this whole table read. I had one line. One line. So I'm sitting there holding in a puke, whatever. As the table read ends, I just muscle it out. I go sprinting to get to my car. I'm puking all over Flatbush Avenue or wherever we were puking. Then I get in the Uber. I puke like five times in the Uber back home, lay down, like, finally. Just, like, get through it. Whatever. My agent's like, great, you know, you got through it. Power through. Like, that's good. Like, you know, you show determination, whatever. Very next day, very next day, first of all, I get a bullshit text from Amy. That was great. It's like, shut up. It was one line. Stop fucking lying. And then, and then, and then, very next day, they're like, oh, yeah, you're going to. They just went in a different direction. So you're going to be replaced with Alex Moffett, which is. Listen, here's the thing is, at the end of the day, it's. It's. This is show business. So it's like, you know, you don't get a part in a movie. I mean, it happens. But I would think, like, as comics, you know, you would at least be like, hey, sorry, this is changing. Or at least be like, no, why don't you just let Chris have the part? Like, what's the. Why did you even make him come in and do four hours of table reads and auditioning? Like, this was a little like. So I think, though, that I think that I was. It was one of those things where I was like, when they asked me to go to the premiere, I'm sure Amy didn't ask me to go to the premiere, but when whoever asked me, I was like, no, no, I. I'm standing up for who I am, and I'm not going. But it was a little, like, up. Like, I just wouldn't. If I was in that position, I just wouldn't do that. I'd either a fight for the comic or B, definitely let the comic know. Like, hey, man, I'm sorry. X, Y, and Z, ch. I know. It's like you got a million other things going on. I get that. I really do known her.
- [13:33]
Giannis Pappas
You've known her for a while.
- [13:34]
Chris DiStefano
It's a little bit like. It's a little bit like, you know, you can go yourself. It's a little. It's a little bit like that, you know? And then I was at the game, and she was. Did like a dance move. Like, she did, like, a dance routine. And I was just kind of sitting there just being like, I hope you throw up just like I did.
- [13:53]
Giannis Pappas
But how is it being up close and personal? LeBron James.
- [13:56]
Chris DiStefano
Let me tell you something. LeBron James. Let me tell you SOMETHING. LeBron James is watching him live. No, like, it's. It's. It's tough to explain. It's almost like he's AI or something. Like, he doesn't even look like the other players. And he's 40. He's the oldest guy on the court, and he's in the best shape, runs the fastest, jumps the highest, is the smartest. And. And you're just like. You can tell. Like, even if you knew nothing. I mean, absolutely nothing about basketball, you would know that that guy looks a little different. You're like, this guy is, like, better. So, you know, like Giannis and I have said on history, Hyenas. Actually, Giannis said that Giannis fully believes that he was made in the lab by the Chinese. He fully believes that he was made cloned in a lab by the Chinese. And that's just a fact. And so. So I'm like, it's possibly true. And then it was cool, you know, it was a cool experience to see Bronnie. LeBron James son get in the game, because the Lakers were winning by quite a few at that point. So the Garden started being like, put in Bronnie. Put in Bronnie, which is pretty dope. And then we. We were able to see the angle we had. We could see LeBron James's wife, Bronnie James's mother, like, take out her phone and like, start recording her son coming on to the court and, like smiling ear to ear, which was like, like, how, how like a mom would record their son at like a high school game. She's recording her son at Madison Square Garden. And it's pretty dope. Yeah.
- [15:20]
Giannis Pappas
I saw a clip of LeBron talking. I think it was on the ESPN where he was like. He was like, yeah. He was like, browning works really hard. He was like, browning doesn't, like, need to play basketball. He was like, he doesn't need the money, that's for damn sure.
- [15:33]
Chris DiStefano
Right.
- [15:33]
Giannis Pappas
Like, he's doing this because he genuinely wants to and he has the passion and he has the drive.
- [15:38]
Chris DiStefano
Right.
- [15:38]
Giannis Pappas
He was like, he could do anything he wants. He was like, if he wanted to be the CEO of my company, I would say, okay, come work for me. Learn how to do it for a few years and do it.
- [15:45]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah.
- [15:45]
Giannis Pappas
Which I thought, like, was a pretty good response. A pretty good response and a cool thing for a dad to say of, like, just be honest. Like, he's not lying. He's not like, to say, like, he. He doesn't need money. Like, we're very wealthy. Like, Right, Right.
- [15:57]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah. Because I. Because I always wondered, like, with Bronnie, like, how does he feel? Like, does he feel traffic agents come? These motherfuckers.
- [16:04]
Giannis Pappas
I'm just keeping an eye. I'm probably just. I'm probably just going to honestly take the street because I looked it up and it says it's 115 for what I'm doing versus 60 for what you might get.
- [16:15]
Chris DiStefano
You ain't going to get a ticket, bro. I know everybody on this block, okay? He runs his block, I run this block. Do I love going out and hanging out with my friends? Yes. Does all that eating and drinking start to take a toll also? Yes. Can I always tell when my body is desperately craving a reset? Yeah. And Prolon by El Nutra does just that. Prolon's five day program gives my system a break. It's fasting, but with food, and it's pretty much a game changer. Full disclosure, I've never really been that good about changing up my health routine. I just haven't. I've just been Chrissy. I don't change this. Whenever I say I want to lose weight or I want to be or I want to be healthier. Nothing really sticks if I don't have a plan. Sometimes I just wind up getting fatter. This is what makes Prolon's five day Program A total game changer, Prolon provides a clear plan with specific daily meals, making it easy to stay focused and achieve results. It all starts with their five day program. Snacks, soups and beverages designed to keep your body in a fasting state. No guesswork or planning required, which is a relief after a busy holiday. Babe, okay. To help you kickstart a health plan that truly works, Prolon is offering Chris DiStefano presents Chrissy Chaos listeners 15 off site wide plus a $40 bonus gift. When you subscribe to their five day nutrition program, just visit prolonlife.com chaos that's P R O L O N l I f e.com chaos to claim your 15 discount and your bonus gift. Rollonlife.com/chahens guys, I want to talk to you about HelloFresh, America's number one meal kit. Are you tired of figuring out what's for dinner night after night? Especially on those busy weekdays? Get dinner done the easy way. Thanks to HelloFresh, it's easy to find time to eat well with 50 wholesome, hassle free meals to choose from each week delivered right to your door. HelloFresh's new red made meals go from the fridge to your fork in just three minutes. It's the same high quality ingredients and restaurant worthy flavor you expect from hellofresh just with none of the work. Their lineup of prep and bake meals come together with minimal mess and only five minutes of prep. So your oven does most of the work, not you. Some valuable time with fewer trips to the grocery store. Thanks to the hello Fresh market, there's over 100 add on items you can add to your weekly box like quick breakfast, packable snacks, beverages and more. I really do love HelloFresh. My family and I use it. It's helped me like learn how to cook more. I use their prepackaged ingredients. Sometimes I mix and match. The food is really fantastic. You can get up to 10 free meals and a free high protein item for life folks. Okay, not for a week for life@hellofresh.com chaos10fm One item per box with active subscription free meals applied as discount on first box. New subscribers only. Varies by plan. That's up to 10 hello fresh meat. That's up to 10 free HelloFresh meals. Just go to hellofresh.com chaos10fm HelloFresh America's number one meal kit. But when I saw Bronnie, when I saw I always wonder with Bronnie, does he think like does he feel because everyone always calls him Like a make a wish. But like, does he feel. By the way, the John Starks promo that I did to promote my Knick stuff where, like, I'm, you know, if you guys have seen it, I did this promo with John Starks, New York, New York Knicks legend. And. And it was a great bit where I was like, you know, he didn't know who I was. And I told him I'm headlining the garden September 11, 2025. And he's like, no. And then I hit a three. And it kind of like we were trying to go for the angle of like a make a wish, but like, obviously you can't do that. You know, whatever. But then I saw Mark Norman commented, make a swish. And I was like, always, always Norman, always with a 10 out of 10.
- [20:33]
Giannis Pappas
Can we do my idea outside the Garden?
- [20:35]
Chris DiStefano
What was it again?
- [20:37]
Giannis Pappas
Have a homeless guy wear a sign that says John Starks. Do the bit you wanted to do right outside msg.
- [20:44]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, I would love or love to do that. I. It says I am John Starks. And he'll spell it S, T, A, R, K, Z. Yeah, I am John Starks. But I always wonder if Bronnie feels that way. Does he feel like a make a swish because. Because he, you know, his. Obviously he has to know and accept that he's only on the Lakers because of his dad. Right? I mean, is that. Yeah, because that's pretty true. Even from the NBA experts. They would say he wouldn't have made the NBA regal without this 100%.
- [21:14]
Giannis Pappas
But I've also seen a lot of people. I've seen a lot of people.
- [21:19]
Chris DiStefano
Why are you looking at your watch?
- [21:21]
Giannis Pappas
I. I got a text from. I got it. I got a text from an unknown number that was like three paragraphs and it confused me.
- [21:27]
Chris DiStefano
What did they say?
- [21:28]
Giannis Pappas
No, it's just a scheduling thing for later.
- [21:29]
Chris DiStefano
From. From the stats. Did they repost my stand up?
- [21:34]
Giannis Pappas
But what I've seen people say is that even though, like, he's only in the lakers because he's LeBron's son, at the same time, like, it was a really good move by the Lakers because, like, now they can develop him how they want. And they were like, he definitely had like bottom of the roster talent, but with like the heart problem, he was going to be like a low draft pick. So why let him go through college when you have his dad here anyway?
- [21:55]
Chris DiStefano
Right?
- [21:56]
Giannis Pappas
You could just develop him through the G League and on the main roster and, like, see how he does.
- [21:59]
Chris DiStefano
But he's playing. He's on the main roster right now. So what happens back and forth? Oh, that. Oh, that. But that's. So is that what the G Leagues become like? They send guys back and forth now it's like. Because usually be like. Like with the mlb, if you get called up, like, you usually stay up. Right.
- [22:15]
Giannis Pappas
NBA is different because there's only, like so many roster spots.
- [22:18]
Chris DiStefano
Right.
- [22:18]
Giannis Pappas
So you will see guys, like, go up and down.
- [22:21]
Chris DiStefano
So, like, a guy will. If you're crushing in the G League, is it even that you're crushing? Or it's like the Lakers might be like, we need a guy to fill this position on the G League for this game. So we just bring them up for that game.
- [22:30]
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, I think it's a little bit of that. But it's also like, if you. I mean, look, the NBA, like, it's what? It's a. It's 11. A 10 man or an 11 man roster?
- [22:36]
Chris DiStefano
I thought it was 12. Is it 12? I thought it was 12 man. NBA roster. Jazz, why are you screaming in the kitchen? Yeah. Because we're recording of audio visual podcast here. Yeah. All right.
- [22:49]
Giannis Pappas
We're both wrong. 15.
- [22:51]
Chris DiStefano
Tristan's been stealing your prime. Tristan's 14 years old. I don't. Can he drink prime? Isn't that like an energy drink? Oh, it's like a Gatorade.
- [23:00]
Giannis Pappas
That's your friend.
- [23:01]
Chris DiStefano
You can't shout out the Paul brothers.
- [23:03]
Giannis Pappas
You can't shit on prime and say that you can't drink it at a certain. That's his whole demographic.
- [23:06]
Chris DiStefano
Can I just tell you something? That Jasmine literally looked dead in my face seriously yesterday and said. And she was not kidding. And I kind of, like looked at her for an extra few moments. I said, you have to be joking. And she was like, I'm not joking. She's. She said, no, I'm going to say it. She literally dead serious looked at me yesterday. She goes, I just had the best idea. I said, what? She goes, we should get married at your Madison Square Garden show. Do it. I said, what? I said, I'm doing a standup show. September 11, 2025. She goes, yeah, but after it, while we have all your friends and family already there, you should. We should just get married at the Garden.
- [23:42]
Giannis Pappas
That's good party is the reception. Oh, also, we haven't seen you. Congratulations.
- [23:46]
Chris DiStefano
Thank you. Yeah, that's the.
- [23:48]
Unknown
I feel like that's a good idea.
- [23:50]
Chris DiStefano
Us getting married at the Garden is probably the most stressful. Trying to plant. I don't want to do it. Let me ask you guys. Let me ask the fans. A question. What do you think is more wild? And I want you to go ahead and vote. Maybe we'll put this up at the Chrissy Chaos Instagram. We'll put this up on the YouTube. But what do you think is more wild? Me and Jasmine getting married at my Madison Square Garden Show September 11, 2025, or the Nazis renting out the garden in 1938? Huh? Your cards have my. Yo, why you trying to take my money? There's a whole lot of money in this. Take it to the bodega. What do you need? You need my credit card? You don't have my cards. You go. You go into Violet's room for your cards. Got that? Your card says Mattel on the back. You already take it anyway. I love that you. She gives her a car with her name, and it's like it's linked to my fucking bank account. You go to my fucking wallet. Honestly, don't. Don't take out any of those numbers. I need those numbers. I'll be getting numbers I still have. I still always drive around with a pen on the driver's side, just in case. Let me get You. Let me get your number, girl. When's the last. When's the last time you got a number? Like, somebody gave you their number written on a piece of paper? Y'all, I want to put on those diabetes socks tonight for you. Put on those diabetes socks on my nuts. Did you get the card? Jazz is upset because we found a home to live in, and it's in Bedford, New York. Bedford. Upstate. We're moving upstate. We're moving upstate until you find out.
- [25:44]
Giannis Pappas
There'S some catastrophic issue with the home.
- [25:46]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah. No, but now. No, here's the thing. That's changed. Radically changed is. Is moving towards a path towards peace. The price range of my house has dropped drastically.
- [25:56]
Giannis Pappas
Okay?
- [25:56]
Chris DiStefano
I've cut the actual. I've cut the actual price in half because I'm just trying to, like, live peacefully and, like, not. You know, I'm not. I'm not trying to overextend it, but Jazz keep pushing me.
- [26:08]
Giannis Pappas
Know what you need to do to choose a home? You need to, like, for a month, like, live in a isolation chamber that only you can have a decision on, because when you're around other people too much, and I don't even mean.
- [26:19]
Chris DiStefano
I don't mean, bye, I love you.
- [26:20]
Giannis Pappas
I don't mean Jazz or anybody here. I mean, like, when you're, like, you. You get, like, a new manager, and then, like, a week later, you're like, My new manager tells me I should move to this neighborhood.
- [26:28]
Chris DiStefano
I know. I know that that was what. That I do do that. I do do that. I get influenced very quickly. But I think the one thing that has been changed because I keep just trying to reset and go to a path towards peace and know that, like, a lot of this stuff, like a house, a lot of these things are just traps. It's like, what start. The priority number one is the kids schooling. Are the kids in good schools where they are now? The answer is yes. So try to keep them here or stay here if they want to stay here. My daughter Delilah was like, I want to be. She's like, I love being the new kid. She was like, I want to go to new school. She said. She was like, I don't care, Dad. I was like, no, but you're too young. You don't even know what you want. She's like, no, I seriously love being the new kid. Because she goes, I can reinvent myself. I was like, okay, so you can create a new lie. That's what daddy does. And. And so. And so. But we're trying to make it all work. But I have it. It is really, like. Because everything is just perception in the way you look at it. Like, I used to look at some of these houses that were out of my price range. Be like, I need that. I deserve that. But now it's like, mentally, if you just get that out of your way, you're like, I actually don't want that. Like, I would like to just have, like, a nice home for my family, feel settled, and, like, not have to, you know, feel, like, normal financial pressure. Like, you know, we all feel some pressure, but. And also, if we're going to feel pressure if. If. If I can. It's a blessing if you can, to not have it come from finances. Like, I'd rather feel pressure creatively, you know, But. So I'm just. But. But it's tough when you. When you. It's tough when you tell a girl, this is what we're gonna get. And then you're like, a week later, like, by the way, forget that I ever even showed you that, because we're gonna get half of that. And then she's like, wait, what? She's like, but I was prepared to get a house that looked like this. And I'm like, yeah, but I'm not going to. I don't want to do that. I don't want to be financially. Because then it gets it to this point where she's like, no, but I think you, like, you're not believing in yourself. You need to work hard. You work so hard. You do so well for us, baby. Like, you're. You've. You've put in so much work. Like, why don't you just. And I'm like. Because then it starts to be like, are you just pushing me now? Are you just fucking pushing me to get something I can't afford? Or am I not believing in myself?
- [28:31]
Giannis Pappas
Are you nervous that if you finally find a place to live, you'll have nothing to talk about on this podcast anymore?
- [28:36]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, it's like, I feel like when CNN reporters, like, just bring up racism all the time, they're like, yeah, because if we don't talk about racism and Trump, we have nothing to talk about.
- [28:44]
Giannis Pappas
Like, when you find a place that you're happy with, like, it's been. We start. I started with you a year and a half ago, and you're just like. You were just getting ready to leave.
- [28:53]
Chris DiStefano
Staten island, which is the craziest thing I've ever done in my life, bar none.
- [28:57]
Giannis Pappas
And for a year and a half, you've been unhappy with wherever you've lived.
- [29:00]
Chris DiStefano
Right. And it's no coincidence that the numbers have been dwindling on the pod. That's no coincidence. So I need. I need to. I need to find. I need to find my. I need to find it and get settled. Because I think now we're at the point where it's like, okay, we're not going to. We can't do this much longer. Fucked around. Okay.
- [29:21]
Giannis Pappas
There's a lot good right now going on. Look, you have. You have msg.
- [29:24]
Chris DiStefano
Yes. You're mostly positive.
- [29:26]
Giannis Pappas
You're engaged, which is pretty chill.
- [29:27]
Chris DiStefano
Right? Capital G, A, Y.
- [29:29]
Giannis Pappas
Like. And honestly, I will say that was the first time we've. We've. We've seen you and Jazz interact since the engagement. You guys look super chill, super good.
- [29:36]
Chris DiStefano
100. And then we have what we call a facade.
- [29:39]
Giannis Pappas
We. We have a good studio situation.
- [29:41]
Chris DiStefano
We do have a good studio situation.
- [29:43]
Giannis Pappas
And then, like, right now, we could do one. We could do here, or we could go there.
- [29:46]
Chris DiStefano
We could pivot. We could go, dude, we're coming to you lot. We're recording this at 8am in the morning. We're coming to you live early in the morning.
- [29:53]
Giannis Pappas
So there's a lot of structure right now that you haven't had for a while. So I feel like things are in a good place.
- [29:57]
Chris DiStefano
Right? We are. We are in a good place. Where. And. And I'm telling you dude, it's just every day path towards peace. Every day I'm thinking the old way, the old way of thinking of me was just like these pre programmed chaotic thought patterns and just like neural pathways that were just crazy. So it's like, it's tough at times to override them. Like, it's tough at, it's tough at times to like not just fall into your old patterns. But I'm really trying to be like, okay, how am I going to get through the next 20 to 30 years of this career? Like, I'm not going to be able to do it the way I've been doing it. So how do we get peaceful? How do we get sustainability? What do we have to do? And that's why I'm smoking fucking crack. Did you go to the gym today? You take the bus to the gym?
- [30:39]
Giannis Pappas
I drove to the gym. I Woke up at 5.
- [30:42]
Chris DiStefano
Wow, you do. My man has not missed.
- [30:45]
Giannis Pappas
I went. Yeah, no, I've been doing, I've been doing. I'm on week weeks five of my 12 week program.
- [30:52]
Chris DiStefano
Wow.
- [30:52]
Giannis Pappas
It's six days a week.
- [30:54]
Chris DiStefano
Six days.
- [30:55]
Giannis Pappas
Six days a week. Yeah.
- [30:56]
Chris DiStefano
Is every day like intense lifting too? Like, like you got a really like when you got up this morning at 5am to get to the gym, it wasn't like, okay, I can like bullshit through a workout. It's like, this is going to be hard. You're going to be breathing heavy, you're going to be sweating. It's going to not be easy. Yeah.
- [31:09]
Giannis Pappas
Today was, today was back, back, arms, shoulders.
- [31:13]
Chris DiStefano
Okay.
- [31:16]
Giannis Pappas
I would say you were like, I think and I've tried to explain this before, you're like probably the least combative.
- [31:21]
Chris DiStefano
Right.
- [31:22]
Giannis Pappas
And least insulting person I know.
- [31:25]
Chris DiStefano
Right.
- [31:25]
Giannis Pappas
Where like when somebody comes onto a podcast, usually like you try to find a place where you can disagree with somebody. I see you give up any standings and beliefs you have the second somebody says something to you with a microphone.
- [31:38]
Chris DiStefano
I, I literally, I am Chrissy Agreeable the la. I hate confrontation. I mean, listen, at times now as you go through this business, like you got to unfortunately confront people. At times I hate having to do it. I almost get mad at the people who for putting me in the position to do it. It's like, you know, you're a dick if you, if even now I had to get confrontational with you because that's the last thing I'd ever want to do. So you know, if I've ever yelled at you or been mad at you, you're probably like an asshole because like I'M the guy that, like, I don't, I just try to just go with the flow. I just want to try to be as happy as I can every day, which is probably making me sad, but I just want to do that. But yeah, no, I, I, I don't know. I've always been that way, so I'm like a little kid.
- [32:19]
Giannis Pappas
I will see somebody come onto the podcast. You'll say something, they'll misunderstand you and disagree with what you just said to your face.
- [32:26]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah.
- [32:27]
Giannis Pappas
And you'll just be like, yeah, exactly, dude. Yes.
- [32:31]
Chris DiStefano
We're just fucking going through the motions. Donnie D. Shout out. Don Depeta. Love Don Depeta. I want, I need to also get a new house. Because when I need, I need, I need guests. I want guests to start sleeping over my house again. I liked when people would sleep over.
- [32:46]
Giannis Pappas
Do you not have room for guests here?
- [32:48]
Chris DiStefano
We don't really know. I want Don to sleep over. I want my dad to sleep over. I want you guys to sleep over. I like having sleepovers and I can't have a sleepover in this house.
- [32:55]
Giannis Pappas
Doesn't your dad sleep here when he comes?
- [32:57]
Chris DiStefano
Yes, he does, but it's, it's very uncomfortable. Like. Yeah, well, he just sleeps all the way upstairs. He's got to go up two flights, you know, like, and there's a very. This is a very small house for a family of five. I mean, it's not small. We can, obviously we, we're happy here. But like, if you add and then guess, it's not good.
- [33:14]
Giannis Pappas
You don't have any first floor rooms, which for somebody with like, older parents, that's tough.
- [33:19]
Chris DiStefano
Yes, exactly. So that's why the stat.
- [33:21]
Giannis Pappas
You actually do have a first floor room, but you've turned it into the sauna room.
- [33:24]
Chris DiStefano
I've turned. Yeah. Well, I know that you couldn't fit a bed back there.
- [33:26]
Giannis Pappas
You don't think so?
- [33:27]
Chris DiStefano
No, I don't think so. Unless you like, knock down that wall.
- [33:30]
Giannis Pappas
Okay.
- [33:30]
Chris DiStefano
No, this, this house was built in like 19. It's a tight fit. But that's what I'm trying to tell Jaz is like, if we can get, we, let's get a, it doesn't to be a holy house. Let's just get like a regular house that has a guest room on the first floor. Like, that should be a priority. I just want everyone to sleep over. But she doesn't want it. She wants to make my dad go up and downstairs. But I'm trying to convince her. It's just dude trying to convince your girl, your wife, fiance to like on like a life change. It's like, it's so hard. You have to like, there's almost like tricks like that. I, I, I have to like try to somehow get her to start looking at houses in you know, another part of the city and just try to tell her like, you know, they have spin bikes there, there's, there's probably a good amount of Puerto Rican people there. It's kind of, it's technically closer to your mom. Because here's the thing, here's what I've accepted is if it's not going to be in this neighborhood because really the main, main thing is keeping my stepson in his high school. And so I'm like if, if we got, if I gotta figure out a way to get him to high school for two years, I'll just figure it out. Like what do you think the furthest anyone came to high school? Like your guys high school. Did you know a kid who came from like dumbass far?
- [34:42]
Giannis Pappas
Well you like in the city it's tough because like you have to take the subway, right. So like I had kids commuting to Xavier from where? Rockaway and Breezy, which on the train is like an hour plus cuz you're coming from the farthest point.
- [34:56]
Chris DiStefano
But they would just sit on the subway for. They would have to leave at like 6am yeah, but would you have anyone coming from outside the city like Long Island, Westchester?
- [35:03]
Giannis Pappas
Long Island, Long Island, Westchester. Yeah.
- [35:05]
Chris DiStefano
So you, oh they would just take the Long island railroad. Yeah, right. What about you John? How far?
- [35:10]
Unknown
Pretty far. There was like 4,000 kids in my high school, public school.
- [35:13]
Chris DiStefano
So you would have kids that maybe was like a 40 minute drive for them.
- [35:16]
Unknown
Maybe not, but probably like half an hour. Definitely.
- [35:18]
Chris DiStefano
Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Because I keep thinking in my head like I'm like what's the radius zone? I'm like how far is too far? Like if I could just get him to a subway station or if I could drive him on the days I could drive him and it's 40 minutes. It's like because his senior year, doesn't every kid start driving their senior year.
- [35:37]
Giannis Pappas
Or not really in the city you get your permanent 16 and get your license.
- [35:42]
Chris DiStefano
He's 15.
- [35:42]
Giannis Pappas
But when do you get your license in the city? Is it not till 18?
- [35:45]
Chris DiStefano
Oh no, I think you, I think you could start driving at 17. New York State.
- [35:51]
Giannis Pappas
Let me find out for you drive.
- [35:52]
Unknown
To school with the permit?
- [35:53]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah.
- [35:54]
Giannis Pappas
No, you can't drive by yourself in the city with A permit.
- [35:56]
Chris DiStefano
You need another driver, right? Vito knows that because he's 30 years old and just got his license now.
- [36:02]
Giannis Pappas
I'm crushing it now. I drive.
- [36:03]
Chris DiStefano
Dude, you drive good. Now, the way that at least, you know, we. I had to move up in my driveway because we got Alton side street parking. And Veto, even though John. John's been driving for 20 years, and then Veto's been. Just started driving a week ago, and only John hit my car when he was driving. I mean, John. No wonder you flew out of the back of a fucking Winnebago.
- [36:24]
Giannis Pappas
John showed up in a fucking red Corvette, dude.
- [36:26]
Chris DiStefano
John's. I almost want to do the podcast from John's red Corvette. I mean, this guy. This car has going through a divorce written all over it.
- [36:34]
Giannis Pappas
It feels like he got fired from the Mets for money laundering with that.
- [36:38]
Chris DiStefano
You know what's crazy, too, is my grand. It made me think of my grandpa. My grandpa. Shout out, pops. He's been dead since 20, since the year 2000, but shout him out. I know he's listening in heaven. And he. And he told me when I was in high school, he was like, I'm gonna get you. You're gonna go to St. John's and I'm gonna get you a red Corvette, and you're gonna drive the red Corvette into St. John's Day one. And I literally thought I was gonna do that. And then when John pulled up in the red Corvette, I was like, I feel like my grandpa's here.
- [37:06]
Unknown
You know, it's so funny. That was my grandpa's old car.
- [37:08]
Chris DiStefano
Really?
- [37:08]
Unknown
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [37:09]
Chris DiStefano
Imagine we have the same grandpa, and my grandpa's just cheating on everyone. Just has multiple families throughout different parts of the state.
- [37:17]
Unknown
That's great.
- [37:19]
Chris DiStefano
It's. Wow. It's crazy. Yeah. I mean, red Corvettes, I've never. Does it drive good?
- [37:24]
Unknown
Yeah, I think so. I mean, again, this is not my car. It's my brother's. I'm babysitting it while he's in Florida.
- [37:29]
Chris DiStefano
And.
- [37:29]
Unknown
Yeah, no, it's. I mean, it's old as me, though. It's 98.
- [37:32]
Chris DiStefano
So John said that his car has been sitting his. The battery's been dead for five days, and he just have to deal with it because he didn't want to pay a hundred bucks to sign up for aaa.
- [37:41]
Unknown
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's. It's still dead.
- [37:43]
Chris DiStefano
I'm like, yeah, but your car. But just pay the 100 bucks. You have your car back.
- [37:47]
Unknown
Hopefully it's getting fixed today.
- [37:48]
Giannis Pappas
I don't know.
- [37:48]
Unknown
I don't know, I think it's like a battery issue. Whatever.
- [37:51]
Chris DiStefano
What do you mean?
- [37:52]
Giannis Pappas
Hopefully it's getting fixed.
- [37:53]
Unknown
My brother. My brother's other brother's handling it, so.
- [37:55]
Chris DiStefano
Oh, the one.
- [37:56]
Unknown
I put him in charge.
- [37:57]
Chris DiStefano
The autistic, this brother? Yeah, yeah.
- [37:59]
Unknown
The boat boy, the stimmer.
- [38:03]
Giannis Pappas
Can you tell him about anything that your brother would say at Big Beach?
- [38:07]
Chris DiStefano
I don't know.
- [38:07]
Unknown
What was he saying about Piggy?
- [38:09]
Giannis Pappas
Confessions.
- [38:10]
Unknown
Oh, yeah. He went to confession. He's like, my family's kind of experimenting with getting religious again.
- [38:15]
Chris DiStefano
Okay.
- [38:15]
Unknown
And he went to confession recently. I don't think I could say what he was doing, but he.
- [38:21]
Chris DiStefano
I was like, why would you.
- [38:22]
Unknown
I wouldn't even get any satisfaction from. I would just feel worse telling a priest whatever I did wrong. You know what I mean?
- [38:28]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah.
- [38:28]
Giannis Pappas
John also pointed out was like, like, did you know the priest? And then he said the name of the priest, and John was like, bro, you see that guy's face every week.
- [38:37]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah.
- [38:37]
Unknown
Which is crazy.
- [38:38]
Chris DiStefano
That, to me, is crazy. Like, to say some you've been doing. Yeah. And then so. So you're saying in the confessional, he didn't see his face.
- [38:46]
Unknown
Yeah, but I mean, like, you know who it is. I mean, it's like, have you ever done confession?
- [38:50]
Chris DiStefano
Sure. Yeah. Yeah.
- [38:50]
Unknown
So it's like, it's like that thin veal, like.
- [38:53]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah.
- [38:53]
Giannis Pappas
Your brother also has, like a noticeable. Like, yeah, he has, like, a specific.
- [38:57]
Unknown
Dude, like, since COVID bro. Like, have you guys been to church at all?
- [39:00]
Giannis Pappas
No.
- [39:01]
Unknown
A little bit empty. I mean, if you go on Christmas, Easter, it's like the church I grew up going to always, always, always filled every Sunday. I like, when I go home, like, visit my parents on weekend. It's like, maybe 25% capacity.
- [39:14]
Chris DiStefano
Why are people going on Zoom or.
- [39:16]
Unknown
I think everybody stopped going during COVID and they're like, ah, we don't feel like going back.
- [39:20]
Chris DiStefano
Interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I. Every time I do confession, you have to read the act of Contrition, which I, I, I used to have memorized when I was a little kid, but now I don't. But the last time I did confession, like, two years ago, I started to cry in the middle of it because you just feel like you're like, why.
- [39:34]
Unknown
Did you feel like you had to do it, though? I don't think I would ever do.
- [39:36]
Chris DiStefano
It again because I think, like, in some. I think, like, I started doing it when I started intermittent fasting because I just want to reset everything from my body to my metabolism to my sins. I just Wanted to reset it, so I did it. But then it's like, you'll immediately then start sinning. Yeah, like, I sin and it's also like, I get religious, what they say, but it's like, did your sins really get wiped away? Also is like me telling him that, like, I jerk off in the sauna. Is that actually a sin? Why is that a sin?
- [40:05]
Giannis Pappas
I mean, you say that on the podcast.
- [40:07]
Chris DiStefano
Exactly. But it's like, why is it really a sin that I'm not married and I'm having sex? Like, did man. Did God say that or did man make that up? Yeah, you know, so it's like, what am I. Like, if I murdered someone, that's actually. I could see a sin. But the other ones, it's like lying, I could say is a sin, but I do it for a living.
- [40:25]
Unknown
What happens if you tell a priest, like, you committed a serious crime, like.
- [40:29]
Chris DiStefano
Like a murder? I think.
- [40:30]
Unknown
Is it like patient confidentiality type doctor thing or.
- [40:33]
Chris DiStefano
I don't know. That's a good question. I feel like they would be legally obligated to have to tell the police, right? Wouldn't they be?
- [40:39]
Unknown
I think so.
- [40:40]
Chris DiStefano
A psych. A psychiatrist is. Does. Oh, they. They. They have to cops. Yeah.
- [40:45]
Unknown
But I. I thought. I thought it's like your therapist can't like, maybe. I don't know.
- [40:49]
Chris DiStefano
I think if you're confessing to a crime. Yeah.
- [40:53]
Giannis Pappas
Priest is not required to report a crime and confession because of the seal of confession.
- [40:57]
Chris DiStefano
What about a therapist? I don't really know. The seal of confession is wild Fucking title. That's the name of this pod. The seal of confession.
- [41:06]
Unknown
Like in the Sopranos. Like, she. Melfi's always like saying, like, you know, we have an agreement when you walk into this room. And like, you know, Tony just basically alludes to like getting people whacked sometimes times.
- [41:18]
Chris DiStefano
Right.
- [41:18]
Unknown
And that's TV though, dude.
- [41:21]
Chris DiStefano
There was you. You're into the Sopranos now.
- [41:24]
Unknown
Always have been.
- [41:24]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, dude, that, that. So the. The therapist, Lorraine Brocco, she. When I. I remember I was in basketball camp, Christ the King basketball camp. And the best player for Syracuse at that time was this guy Jason Sepola. And that's like when Syracuse was like, going like, you know, deep into the tournament. Syracuse was dope. He played for Christ the King. And I was like a big Jason. Like, I. I dick rode Jason Sepola. Like, heavy, like, I shirt that said, like, I made my mom make it. It said number one Jason Sepola fan. Like, I. And the kids were like making fun of me. They're like, you're a loser. Like. And I. Looking back, it's like, I'm a. It was like, loser behavior. Like, I was like, I just love Jason Sepola. Big fan. Wanted Syracuse shorts. Like, if I could find these pictures, you'd be like, you are. It's insane. What a geek I was. But anyway, you know, one day, like, I remember. I remember. You're so worried. No, you're good. One day, Seppola, you know, Sopranos was, like, a huge show back, you know when this happened. He came in to, like, the camp and, like, with his girlfriend, and it was Lorraine Bracco from Google. Jason Sepolo, Lorraine Broccoli. I don't know if they might still be together.
- [42:35]
Unknown
He was a college student.
- [42:36]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, he was, like, in his mid-20s, dude. And he was dating her. She, like, was out and, like, Google. I'm almost positive that was that happened. Am I making that up or. That's real.
- [42:45]
Unknown
70 now.
- [42:46]
Chris DiStefano
So she's 70 right now?
- [42:48]
Unknown
Yeah. And that was probably if you're in college, like. Or was that when you were. How old were you?
- [42:52]
Chris DiStefano
I was like. No, I was like a kid.
- [42:55]
Unknown
Okay.
- [42:55]
Chris DiStefano
I was like a little kid. Well, she's 70. C, I P, P, O L A. Jason Sepola.
- [43:03]
Giannis Pappas
I have a picture of them together. I just can't find their dating history.
- [43:06]
Unknown
When we had AJ On. It's crazy. Like, everybody was saying how he is the same age now as Tony, as Gandolfini was when they started the show.
- [43:13]
Chris DiStefano
Really?
- [43:14]
Unknown
Yeah.
- [43:14]
Chris DiStefano
How old was Gandalfini when they started the show? In his 30s maybe.
- [43:18]
Unknown
I think.
- [43:19]
Chris DiStefano
Right.
- [43:19]
Unknown
About 40, right? Or something like that.
- [43:22]
Chris DiStefano
That's wild, dude. Lorraine, she was hot in Sopranos, right? Yeah, hell, yeah. She was hot in Good, fellas. She's just a beautiful woman. Oh, yeah. So what does it say?
- [43:31]
Giannis Pappas
They met on the set of the sopranos. He was 32, she was 50. Sepolo was a member of the Theatrical Teamsters Union.
- [43:40]
Chris DiStefano
What?
- [43:41]
Giannis Pappas
And he was driving for David Chase.
- [43:44]
Chris DiStefano
What do you mean, driving for David? Like, he was like. He was a limo driver type thing. That's pretty sick, though, that you're, like, the driver and you and you and you hook up with the star of the show. That's pretty dope. Well, I didn't realize that he was 32 at the time, and she was 50. So what year is this?
- [44:04]
Unknown
If she was 50, there's exactly 22,005.
- [44:09]
Chris DiStefano
Right? Right. So then I. No, so I'm. So then. When did I.
- [44:14]
Giannis Pappas
2006.
- [44:16]
Chris DiStefano
So then wait, there's no way that this is accurate then, because I was in. I was a camper. Unless maybe I was older and I'm. And the memories are getting jumbled. That's what starts happening. You get older. Like, the memories get jumbled in your brain. Like, I know I met him at Christ King basketball camp, but I had to be, like, 13 years old back then, so I would be 13 in 1997. So that doesn't line up with those.
- [44:38]
Giannis Pappas
Dates, but that's when he was playing.
- [44:40]
Chris DiStefano
Right. But then I know that Seppola. I know that I saw Seppola and Lorraine Bracco together as a couple also at Christ the King or in that area. So I must have went back for something, and I'm jumbling it all.
- [44:51]
Giannis Pappas
Because think of. Even when the Sopranos was on, you weren't in high school at that point.
- [44:55]
Chris DiStefano
I was in college. Yeah, right. When did the soprano start? 2002, maybe.
- [45:00]
Giannis Pappas
99.
- [45:01]
Chris DiStefano
Oh, no, 99. I was in high school.
- [45:03]
Giannis Pappas
Oh, you were?
- [45:04]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, I. I was in high school from 1998 to 2002.
- [45:09]
Giannis Pappas
99 was the. When it started. Summer. 99. So you're out of high school probably, right?
- [45:15]
Chris DiStefano
No, no, I. I didn't graduate high school to 2002. Oh.
- [45:18]
Giannis Pappas
Oh, yeah, because 911.
- [45:19]
Chris DiStefano
911, dude, I was a senior. Yeah, that was the. That was the first. How wild is that? That was the first week of my senior year. Just nine. Eleven happened, actually. It was, like, not even a week. We're probably in school for, like, three days. Right? Because when do you start school? September 5th, 6th. Yeah. So then the weekend. Does anyone ever remember, like, what they were doing September 10, 2001? I would, like, love to know, like, what I was doing then.
- [45:45]
Unknown
I remember I was three.
- [45:47]
Chris DiStefano
Do you remember? How old are you, Vito?
- [45:50]
Giannis Pappas
I was in, like. I was in fourth grade.
- [45:52]
Chris DiStefano
You said, like, I was nine. I would love to make a movie. Like, September 10th.
- [45:57]
Giannis Pappas
I know a few guys who probably know what they were doing the day before.
- [46:00]
Chris DiStefano
Exactly. Fucking scumbags. That's the one thing about my show, September 11, 2025, at the Garden is just to remind you fuckers that terrorists didn't win. We won. The good guys.
- [46:12]
Giannis Pappas
I'm not trying to freak you out, but you know what I was thinking of? If a terrorist wanted to get back in America.
- [46:18]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah.
- [46:18]
Giannis Pappas
You're going to have a lot of cops and firefighters there.
- [46:21]
Chris DiStefano
I know, dude. All of Queens is going to be empty from. The cops and firemen are going to be at my show. Know what else they told me is that. Because it's the. You know, September 11th, obviously, in New York, there'll be, you know, things, of course, commemorations and all that in the morning, but they always. If there's a Garden. Madison Square Garden show at night, they always suggest to, like. They always keep seats open for the president to, like, come to the. Could you imagine the president. Could you fucking imagine? Donnie T. Comes to my show because. Show at the Garden, and then I bring him up on stage as a surprise. Could you imagine? I have.
- [46:55]
Giannis Pappas
Well, this is the first sitting president to go to a Super Bowl. So, like, this isn't he.
- [46:58]
Chris DiStefano
It's possible. It is possible.
- [47:00]
Unknown
He's going to Super Bowl.
- [47:01]
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
- [47:01]
Chris DiStefano
I'd have Bernie Williams come out, play the national anthem. Then I'd have the comics come up. Then I bring up Action Bronson. And then I'm saying. And then also, we got another special. Special guest, Donnie T. Dude, what if.
- [47:13]
Giannis Pappas
Trump did the 911 story with you?
- [47:15]
Chris DiStefano
Oh, my God. And he can't. And started is actually brought to doing the show. Yeah. Oh, I probably shouldn't say that. Shouldn't you? Hold. Yeah, yeah. Hold that back. Hold that back. Hold that back. Cut that out. I think he's doing the show, but I didn't know, like, you have all these people on the show, and then it's like, mad union fees. It's like. It's like. So I'm gonna be. I swear to God, I'm gonna be the first guy in history to, God willing, sell out Madison Square Garden and lose money.
- [47:42]
Giannis Pappas
That's your brand, though.
- [47:43]
Chris DiStefano
That's my brand, dude. And I. And I really am doing the Milwaukee Improv the next week. So that's just who I. The. I am. But honestly, talking to my agent, he was like, you know, look, dude, it's kind of fun. He was like, for you, it means, you know, obviously, it's like a bucket list. For me, it would be, you know, you do the Beacon Theater, then Radio City, then I got to do the theater at msg, which is, like, a nice bonus. And now to do actual msg, in a way, it almost, like, sets me free, mentally from this, because this has been, like, my only goal, really, since 2009, 2010. So it's like 15 years of, like, get this show. Have a good time. Have fun. And then it's like just. It's almost like, now you can go back to go. You want to go back and do the Beacon. You want to go do Town Hall? Because I love just being in New York. It's like, go do the comedy clubs again, do all that. But it's like, get, like, get this, you know, feel like you did it, and then that's it. Have. You know, for me, it's going to be fun to, like, just, like, have people walking by after the show who didn't even know what was happening. And then I'm just having, like, a celebration party on 9 11.
- [48:44]
Giannis Pappas
I mean, you're on a pretty exclusive list of.
- [48:46]
Chris DiStefano
Of people, right?
- [48:47]
Giannis Pappas
Of comedians who headline Madison Square Garden.
- [48:50]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, it's not too many. It's like maybe 20.
- [48:52]
Giannis Pappas
Dice. Chris Rock, Dane Cook, Louis C.K. schultz.
- [48:56]
Chris DiStefano
Sebastian.
- [48:57]
Giannis Pappas
Sebastian.
- [48:58]
Chris DiStefano
Gaffigan.
- [48:59]
Giannis Pappas
Gaffigan.
- [49:00]
Chris DiStefano
Bill Burr.
- [49:00]
Giannis Pappas
Bill Burr.
- [49:01]
Chris DiStefano
Aziz, Aziz, Schumer, Schultz, Louie.
- [49:07]
Giannis Pappas
I said those. I said those.
- [49:09]
Chris DiStefano
And that's 10 right there. Yeah. Yeah.
- [49:10]
Giannis Pappas
So, like, it's probably. It's probably closer to, like, 15. Who've done the actual Garden, headlined it right on their own.
- [49:16]
Chris DiStefano
Do I have to sell out for if. If I don't sell out? Is it Bonty Boy?
- [49:20]
Giannis Pappas
No, I think, like, doing the Garden, like, you were. You were selected to do a show at Madison Square Garden. Like, they didn't choose you because they didn't think you could, and they didn't choose you because, like, you're at the level where they see you as worthy of the Garden.
- [49:33]
Chris DiStefano
Because sometimes I feel like Bronnie James in the sense that I'm like, oh, I, I, I know. Like, the, the, you know, I've been going to the garden for 10 years, 11 years. Like, I know the staff there. I know the people there that. The coolest people in the world. And, And I almost felt like, oh, are they only giving me the Garden? Because, like, you know, I've just been, like, hanging around there, and then my agent was like, no, maybe they put you on, like, a fundraiser show or whatever, you know, like, give you a little chance. But, like, the Garden is not charity. Like, it's a business. Yeah. You really can't put you in there and then you lose them money. They think you can do it.
- [50:05]
Giannis Pappas
Yeah. Like, you realize they have to pay that night that you're performing. They still have to pay their staff. Like, it's not like you do the show and, like, they're, they're like, oh, like, we're not going to bring in our concession stand.
- [50:14]
Chris DiStefano
Our security. Yeah.
- [50:16]
Giannis Pappas
Our labor. Like, you're, you're going to be.
- [50:17]
Chris DiStefano
This is legitimate show, and they need to make money. Like, they need to.
- [50:21]
Giannis Pappas
They need to sell concessions. They need to sell beer. They need to. They, like.
- [50:25]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah. So they said that the flyer. They need, they need to change. They need to make my name bigger in Madison Square Garden. Smaller.
- [50:31]
Unknown
We already did it.
- [50:31]
Chris DiStefano
You did that?
- [50:32]
Unknown
Yeah, yesterday.
- [50:33]
Chris DiStefano
That's it, Brian. But it is funny, I said on history is if tickets aren't selling well, you're going to start seeing little add ons. The Wedding Maurice is coming out now. It's turned into a live history hyena show. I'll just start mentioning every special guest that was there, even ones that aren't there. I'll be like, yo, Schultz, can you just say you're gonna be there? So, yeah, but no, I'm really excited, man. September 11, 2025, you know, Christy comedy.com for tiki wikis. Of course, if you're not in the New York area, we got a bunch of other I got a lot of stuff coming out. We got Texas, Portland, fly to the Garden. Providence, Rhode island, come to pro. If you're not going to come to the Garden, come to Providence, Rhode Island, March 30th. That's going to be a big show. March 30th, Providence, Rhode Island. But yeah, dude, if you're in the just come to msg, dude.
- [51:18]
Giannis Pappas
Do both every.
- [51:19]
Chris DiStefano
Yeah, because they're doing it different.
- [51:20]
Giannis Pappas
The Garden is going to be different than all your other shows.
- [51:22]
Chris DiStefano
The Garden set is going to be different than all my other shows. But Providence, Rhode island, at the Vets Memorial Auditorium and Madison Square Garden. Come through, baby. Christy, comedy.com for ticky wikis.