testimony with Lola Sheen

Summary

Podcast Summary: Christ With Coffee On Ice

Host: Ally Yost
Guest: Lola Sheen
Episode: Testimony with Lola Sheen
Date: August 15, 2025

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Overview

This deeply personal and uplifting episode centers on vulnerability, hope, and transformation through faith in Christ. Host Ally Yost sits down with Lola Sheen, sharing an honest conversation about Lola’s journey from growing up in a high-profile Hollywood family and struggling with anxiety, depression, and a lack of identity, to finding hope, belonging, and new life in Jesus. Through raw storytelling and genuine laughter, Ally and Lola explore the realities of mental health, the emptiness of worldly pursuits, and the profound rescue available in Christ.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Lola’s Early Life and Spiritual Upbringing

• Growing up Catholic but Distant from Christ
  • Lola shares that, despite attending Catholic school and church with her family, “I never knew the Holy Spirit. I never knew Jesus. You know, it was always God. Like, I never knew of Jesus.” (01:35)
  • Prayer felt impersonal and scripted: “It was nothing, like, personal for me… I always feel like it had to be, like, a perfect prayer.” (02:30)
• Religion vs. Relationship
  • Ally clarifies: “It was, like, more kind of religious, I guess… rather than you coming up with your own words to pray.” (02:42)
  • Lola admits she never experienced the presence of God growing up.

2. Life in the Public Eye & Identity Struggles

• Fame’s Shadow and Isolation
  • Lola describes her family as “in the public eye… both actors,” but “I always felt like on the outside, I always felt like I was just made for something else. But I never knew what it was, you know?” (04:18)
• Challenges with Friendships and Trust
  • Friends would mention stories from the news about her before she even knew. “People were just friends with me because they just wanted something… A lot of it became about money.” (06:13)
  • Parents’ fame led to isolation at school: “Some people weren’t allowed to be my friend.” (06:39)
• Lack of Identity
  • “I did not know who I was before I found Jesus.” (07:57)
  • Deep insecurity rooted in being known only as “so and so’s daughter” (07:40).

3. Mental Health Struggles

• Anxiety, Fear, and Depression
  • Lola details severe anxiety and depression beginning in high school, triggered by relentless public attention and personal pressures.
  • “I started experiencing pretty bad, like, anxiety and depression… I felt pretty lonely in high school.” (09:04)
  • Harsh inner critic: “The way I saw myself when I was depressed was really bad. Like, I just didn’t have any self worth.” (29:25)
• Isolation as an Enemy Tactic
  • “I noticed the first thing I think the Enemy always liked attack was to isolate me.” (28:45)
  • Periods of months where Lola rarely left her bedroom, overwhelmed by fear and panic attacks.

4. Temporary Relief vs. True Healing

• Therapy Helped, But Only So Much
  • “There are resources in the world… that can help. But I think what the difference is between the help of the world and the help of Jesus is…the help of the world can only go so far.” (25:57-26:14)
  • Ally: “Do you want complete healing? Do you want all the help that you need? Do you want full deliverance?” (26:32)
• Search for Anchors
  • During her darkest periods, Lola sought comfort in crystals, psychics, and even mourning rituals but never felt truly fulfilled.
  • “I just walked out [of a psychic reading] and I never walked out being like, oh my gosh, like, I have so much hope for my future... I never felt fulfilled, obviously.” (23:18)

5. The Turning Point: Encounter with Jesus

• Hopelessness Before Meeting Christ
  • “I was really being like, no, I’m never gonna make it out of this. I never thought I was gonna turn 19… I just didn’t see myself coming out of that room. Like, I was like, I think my life is just going to be these four walls forever.” (31:54, 21:37)
• Divine Intervention through Social Media
  • One night, in despair, a video from Ally appeared on Lola’s TikTok feed:
    • “It was just like a light in your eyes… the first time I felt like, some sort of, like, light.” (35:48)
    • “I remember, like, sitting for a second, and I was like, wait, I’ve never thought about Jesus. Like, who is that?” (35:57)
• Supernatural Encounter
  • “It literally was like Jesus came in my room. Like, his presence, like, filled my room…I felt like Jesus just hugged me. It was like I felt like, warmth on my hand.” (36:45)
  • The word “Rescue” echoed in her mind, leading her to Lauren Daigle’s song “Rescue” (38:32).

6. Beginning a Relationship with God

• Google Discipled Me
  • “I looked up on safari because I didn’t even know how to pray… a Prayer to give my life to Jesus. And I prayed it.” (39:23, 39:49)
  • Found community and guidance through Ally’s digital content, using YouTube, podcasts, and live Bible readings for encouragement and instruction.
• Plugging into Christian Community
  • Ally and Lola recounted how a CBN interview led to their connection, eventually resulting in Lola joining Ally’s church community in person:
    • “It literally changed my entire life. I prayed every day for one sister in Christ and a spiritual family… and then He gave me so many.” (44:37-45:02)

7. Reflections and Encouragement

• On Faith and Identity
  • Ally praises Lola’s growth: “You really value…you fear God, like, above all else. It’s crazy. Like, the 180 of you coming from a place of, like, all you did was fear people…” (47:22)
• The Power of Small Acts of Obedience
  • Ally recalls making the TikTok video after feeling a strong burden from God: “I didn’t even understand it. Like, I didn’t know what it was or why I felt so burdened…But I felt the Lord be like, you have to make this video, and I need you to give people hope.” (45:20)
• Hope for Listeners
  • The episode closes with gratitude and an invitation to embody Christ’s love in daily life.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Spiritual Emptiness:
  “I never knew the Holy Spirit. I never knew Jesus… I never felt the presence of the Lord before when I would go to church.”
  – Lola Sheen (01:35)

• On Identity in Christ:
  “I did not know who I was before I found Jesus.”
  – Lola Sheen (07:57)

• On Isolation and Anxiety:
  “I was just, like, stuck. Like, I was so scared of every little thing… I felt like I was going crazy.”
  – Lola Sheen (21:00-21:36)

• On Encountering Jesus:
  “It literally was like Jesus came in my room…my room was so filled with the Holy Spirit. I felt like Jesus just hugged me.”
  – Lola Sheen (36:43-36:45)

• On Christian Community:
  “I prayed every day for one sister in Christ and a spiritual family… and then He gave me so many. And not only did He give me a sister in Christ, but you.”
  – Lola Sheen (44:47-45:02)

• Ally’s Encouragement:
  “You will be able to do anything in your life as long as you’re in that heart posture of like, all I need is Jesus…”
  – Ally Yost (47:22)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Segment/Theme | |-----------|-------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:35–02:55 | Lola’s spiritual background and early religious experience | | 04:02–07:57 | Growing up in the public eye, family dynamics, and identity issues | | 09:04–13:14 | Mental health: anxiety, depression, and challenges with fame | | 19:05–21:46 | First major depressive episode & season of isolation | | 23:02–24:00 | Seeking hope in psychics and New Age practices | | 26:06–26:45 | Distinction between temporary help and complete healing in Christ | | 31:33–32:21 | Deepest point of hopelessness: “I never thought I was gonna turn 19.” | | 35:34–36:43 | The transformative encounter with Jesus | | 39:23–39:57 | Looking up how to pray; digital discipleship | | 42:09–44:47 | Finding community through Ally and church | | 47:22–47:52 | Ally’s words of encouragement and blessing |

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Tone & Final Reflections

The tone throughout is genuine, tender, and hope-filled. Both Ally and Lola laugh, reminisce, and speak candidly about pain, healing, and the ongoing journey with Christ. Their conversation feels like two friends sharing life over coffee, maintaining humility and warmth as they explore very real struggles and the joy of redemption.

For listeners—especially those wrestling with darkness, uncertainty, or longing for deeper community—Lola’s story offers both empathy and the hope of radical change through Jesus, magnifying the importance of personal faith and connection.

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Transcript

[A]

Hello, everybody. Welcome to another episode of Christ with Coffee on Ice. I am your host, Ali Yost. It is a joy and honor to be here today. And, guys, today is actually a very exciting day. It's an exciting day, and we know that these days actually don't come very often. Typically, it's just me on the podcast. We don't really always have a lot of guests. Today is just a special day, and we're gonna know as we get into this, like, this is very significant, and this is such a cool day. We have sweet Lola Sheen on the podcast today.

[B]

Hi, everyone. I love you. Love you. Lol.

[A]

You guys, Lola is. I know. We're holding our coffees. We have our coffee on ice ready.

[B]

So cute. Cheers. Take a little sip.

[A]

I got you what I got. Because that's what you said.

[B]

You said, oh, so good. I've always wanted to drink out of one of these.

[A]

I forgot what I got some type of cinnamon something. Do you like it?

[B]

Sugar?

[A]

Yeah, that's what I got.

[B]

It's really good. So good.

[A]

Lola is so funny. She'll be like, I don't know. Whatever you like, whatever you get, whatever you want. And so I'm like, I don't even know if you're gonna like what I get, but okay, I trust it.

[B]

Okay, good.

[A]

I'm glad you like it.

[B]

Me too.

[A]

Lola, hi.

[B]

Hi, Ellie. Thank you for having me.

[A]

Oh, my gosh. It's a joy.

[B]

I'm so excited.

[A]

I am, too. I think the coolest thing that we could talk about is obviously your testimony of how you came to the Lord. Yeah. So I guess my first question for you would be, what was your life like before knowing Jesus?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What I really want to ask is, like, who did you think Jesus was before you met him? Did you believe in him? Had you encountered him before? Or were you just like. I didn't really have a relationship with God. What was it like before? Before you encountered him?

[B]

Yeah. So I grew up Catholic, and I went to this Catholic school, but I never, like, I would go to church sometimes, but I never knew why I was going. We would go to church on Christmas and Easter, but it was never, like, I never knew the Holy Spirit. I never knew Jesus. You know, it was always God. Like, I never knew of Jesus.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Yeah. And I never felt the presence of the Lord before when I would go to church. I never really knew why I was going, you know? Yeah. And the Bible seemed like. I don't know, it never seemed like actually like it was the word of life. I felt like, it was just like, I never knew what the Bible was either. And so, yeah, I didn't know Jesus in school. I would just go to church with my friends, but we had to, you know. Yeah. And then I would just come home, and that was really it. Yeah. So I didn't know anything.

[A]

So you're saying it was more so, like, God focused rather than Jesus focused.

[B]

I never felt like I never knew the Holy Spirit and I never prayed, really. And when I did pray, like, at church, it was kind of like. Like a specific prayer. Yeah. It was nothing, like, personal for me.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You know?

[A]

Yeah. So you never were, like, in your bedroom on a random day being like, hi, God, it's me? It was, like, more kind of religious, I guess, where they're like, the words were given to you to pray rather than you coming up with your own words to pray.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. Ally. I always feel like it had to be, like, a perfect to prayer, you know? But I would pray to my nana a lot, so I always pray to some, you know, But I didn't really know what I was doing, you know? But in moments where I was, like, having a hard time, I would just look up and ask my nana to help me.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I was looking.

[A]

Oh, I bet Jesus heard that.

[B]

I know. Me too. I always think about that. So. But, yeah, I never knew the Lord, like, actually knew him.

[A]

Wow. And also, too.

[B]

I guess.

[A]

I don't know, should we. We should also introduce, like, who is Lola?

[B]

She.

[A]

Who is sweet Lola Sheen, if you guys don't know her. So, Lola, tell us more also about, like, where you come from and who you are and all of that.

[B]

Okay. I come from a family who's in, like, Hollywood, like, the public eye. And so, yeah, my parents, they're both actors. And I never was really, like, felt like that was meant for me, you know? Yeah. And so, yeah. But I come from a family who's very in the public eye, and I never really. How do I explain? Almost, like, open to this stuff. Like, I never had, like, a. It was never, like, around me a lot, but. Yeah.

[A]

So you grew up in a family where there's a lot of, like, attention and cameras and all of this stuff. And how did that make you feel growing up? Like, did you feel kind of like a black sheep or you're like. I don't know. I just don't feel like that's my calling. Or were you like. I love this.

[B]

I always felt like on the outside, I always felt like I was just made for something else. But I never knew what it was, you know? Do you know yet? I kind of. Kind of.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You know, like now that I have Jesus, I'm like, he was what I was looking for. But I know like, I was just. I just never was like, wanted to go that way.

[A]

Yeah. You didn't want to like act or anything?

[B]

Wanted to act. And then when I was around like cameras, cuz my whole life was basically public. Yeah.

[A]

That's crazy.

[B]

So crazy.

[A]

Like from the get go, you were born into that, which I can't even imagine.

[B]

So crazy. Yeah, I just remember like whenever I would deal with like paparazzi or stuff was in the news, like it never felt right to me. And like I get so many questions, like when I was younger, like, oh, this is like what you're gonna be like. And I was just like, I don't know, I always like did my own thing kind of. I always sort of stayed out of the way. Yeah.

[A]

And you have siblings too, right?

[B]

I have siblings, yes. I have an older sister, her name is Sammy, and then a younger sister and her name is Eloise. And then I have a stepdad, his name's Aaron. And then my mom's Denise. And then my dad is Charlie.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, I love that.

[A]

Okay, so. Yeah. So growing up, we're in the public eye, everyone's looking at you. We're growing up Catholic or at least like going to Catholic school. Don't know Jesus. We know of God. We know the things to say to God. Don't really know the Holy Spirit. You don't have intimacy with God. So what was that like? Even with just the way that you grew up, like in school and everything? What, what was it like making friendships? What was it like finding your hobbies or the things that you. Tell me about all of that too.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. I had a really hard time making friends and trusting people because I would go to school and my friends would come to me and tell me something that was in the news that I didn't even know. And I don't know. I always felt like people were just friends with me because they just wanted something.

[A]

And what made you feel that way? Like, did you feel that that was actually something you found out about certain friends? Or was it just the way that they would act around you and then behind your back? Like, what made it so hard?

[B]

A lot of it became about money. Like people like going on trips and like sort of just taking. I felt a little like maybe taken advantage of by some people, you know, but it's. I'm Sure. A lot of people can relate to that. But, Yeah. I had a hard time with friends also. Some people weren't allowed to be my friend.

[A]

That's a crazy thing.

[B]

Isn't that crazy, Ally?

[A]

Because of your family.

[B]

Wow. Because there was just so much stuff public.

[A]

They, like, they didn't want to be associated with it.

[B]

Wow. And then even with hobbies and stuff, like when my dad would come to my. Like, soccer games or my. Like, horseback riding or whatever it is, there's always paparazzi there or everybody would talk about it and stuff.

[A]

About him being there.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. And so those things were a little interesting. I always felt very, like, looked at. Yeah. Okay.

[A]

I have another question, too. And don't let me project this if this wasn't the case.

[B]

But I would.

[A]

I'm just like. If I were to put myself in Lola's shoes. And I'm thinking about, like, how that would be. Obviously, you love your parents.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They've been successful at what they do. But at the same time, would you feel as if. If you were kind of like, living in a shadow or like you just weren't able to even have your own identity where you're like, I'm just Lola.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Was that hard, or. I can only imagine. I feel like people would be like, oh, you're so and so's daughter before just saying you're Lola.

[B]

Yeah. Yes.

[A]

You know.

[B]

Oh, wow. That happens all the time. Yeah. Even now it happens. But I always did feel in the shadow. Yeah. I never feel like I was known for me, you. And they actually wanted to know me. Yeah. I feel like I was just known.

[A]

For, like, where you came from.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I did not know who I was before I found Jesus.

[A]

So we have a lack of identity maybe during this time, which makes sense. We all. If we don't have Jesus, I did, too. I didn't know who I was, or I think I had theories of maybe who I thought I was. But it's hard without Jesus, so that.

[B]

Makes sense, I think, because I was listening to what so many people were saying online, it was like that became how I saw myself.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You know?

[A]

Yeah. Here, should we take a sip of our coffee?

[B]

Yeah. Should we?

[A]

Why does mine look lighter than yours when we got the same thing?

[B]

It does. Mm. Oh.

[A]

What's that about?

[B]

Maybe they put more milk in yours. Maybe.

[A]

Okay. So that's like middle school, high school.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So what was your experience like in high school, growing up? Also, did you have, like, an idea of what you wanted to do with your life? I didn't. So, no. No pressure if you didn't. I had no idea.

[B]

Ok.

[A]

But, like, at this point, do we have any more vision? Like, where are we at when it comes to friendships? Like, what we want to do with our life? I guess, like, press, like, all that stuff? In high school.

[B]

In high school, I did have, like, some friends. Yeah. These, like, girls that I was friends with. It never felt like it was, like, deep friendships, you know?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I don't know. I had a really hard time in high school. That was when I started experiencing pretty bad, like, anxiety and depression. And I also felt like in high school, I was still on the outside. Like, I never, like, had someone that was like, wow, like my friend, you know, like a good, good friend. But, yeah, I did feel a little like I felt pretty lonely in high school. I also felt like I was kind of following what everybody else wanted to do, and I tried really hard to fit in. I remember, like, I never really did things because I wanted to do it. Like, I would just agree because I wanted to be liked, I guess. Yeah. And then I started to want to model. Model in high school. But I don't know if that was because I. I really wanted to or it's just because my sister was getting into modeling. And then my mom did, too.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I was like, oh. I feel like I felt like. Ali also was gonna say, like, I always felt like the only way I could be successful is if I did something that my mom did. Wow. Yeah. So in high school, I started trying to model, and I think God was really protecting me because it never worked out. I had so many.

[A]

It totally could have been his protect.

[B]

His protection.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

So, yeah, I tried modeling so many times.

[A]

And what is that when you say you tried to model, what does that mean? Like, were you signed with, like, an agency and stuff or.

[B]

I tried. Okay. I try to get signed. They never wanted me.

[A]

I love that. It can be, like, such rejection. Like, there are times where I look back in my life and I'm like, wow. They, like, really were like. No.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There was even a season where I tried to model, too. And really, I mean, I did a little bit, but it was, like, for, like, rooms to go. No, it's like a furniture company. And I mean, it was the coolest thing at the time, actually, because that's so cool. I would just model on couches. So I would, like, sit on a couch. And I'm doing it right now, actually, but we're switching for the pod but, yeah, I would model on couches, and then it would come in our newspaper and my parents would be. So they'd, like, cut it out and put it on the fridge. That's the kind of modeling I got into.

[B]

That's so cute.

[A]

But there were a couple agencies that were like, you're too short, you know, whatever. And so it really didn't, like, work out a lot for me either. But that's okay. You know, we try things, and if there's not a grace, then there just isn't a grace. So modeling. You're beautiful. You're beautiful. You could be a model, but there.

[B]

Just wasn't a grace for it.

[A]

And that's okay.

[B]

I never felt like I could do it right.

[A]

Your heart probably wasn't even totally right. Were you like, I can't wait to be a model, or were you like.

[B]

I didn't feel like.

[A]

Sure, yeah.

[B]

You know.

[A]

Yeah, that makes sense. Okay. I remember the other question I was going to ask you is with, like, I don't know, like, were people writing about you, like, all the time? Or was it, like, every so often, like.

[B]

Or was it.

[A]

Were there seasons where it was, like, constant, where you were like, okay, I literally can't stop seeing things that are being said about me or my family. And also, like, did you have to learn how to set any kind of boundaries with looking at that stuff, or were you just, like, consumed in that and caring so much about. Because it sounds like before Jesus, you really cared a lot about what people had to say because you're like, I don't know. I guess that matters, right. Is what everyone else is saying about me and my family.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So. Yeah. What was that like?

[B]

Yeah, I remember. I think my mom, she did try her best to keep me protected from what people would be saying, but then I would come to school, and then people would tell me things there and so.

[A]

So you would find out anyway.

[B]

I would find out anyways. I did read a lot of stuff. There was a lot of stuff going on with my dad in elementary school, and so I always felt very unsafe. Like, I felt like stuff was just always being said.

[A]

I wonder if that's what made you such an anxious being. I know that, like, that kind of environment of, you know, would make me very anxious. So I can imagine, like, how, you know, just going to school every day and not knowing.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What people are thinking or what they could be saying or what they're going to tell you next. Like, that's not a very peaceful environment.

[B]

Yeah. It's so True. I always think about that, Ali. Yeah. Like, I asked the Lord a lot why I experience so much anxiety. And I think it's just, like, the way my brain was wired was just being like, fight or flight in case, like, something happens, you know? Yeah.

[A]

Because of your environment.

[B]

Yeah, because my environment.

[A]

Totally.

[B]

There was a lot of stuff, like being said I would have helicopters over my house. Stop it. Isn't that crazy?

[A]

That's crazy.

[B]

I know. And, like, stalkers, too, because when your stuff's online, people just, like, you know, they see you. And so people can be really. It's wild.

[A]

I like, for. I, like, don't. I forget how much people could be obsessed with your parents? I get. They are, like, famous.

[B]

I forget.

[A]

I'm like, I guess they're really famous.

[B]

I forget all the time.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, I bet. I mean, they're just your parents to you. Even to me, I mean, I feel like they're more so, like, famous than maybe my, like, my parents generation. Like, you know?

[B]

So.

[A]

Yeah, I, like, forget. They're kind of. I guess they're like a big deal.

[B]

I know, but that's crazy.

[A]

Like, helicopters and stalkers. I'm like, oh, my gosh. Yeah, that's. No, that's. That's hard for kids.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. But I forget a lot that they're famous. Yeah. I bet it happens with my dad a lot where I'll just be with him and I realize. And I'm like, wait. And it's, like, so weird.

[A]

Wait, so what makes you realize? I don't know, like, are people staring or. Like, what?

[B]

Sometimes I just have little moments where I'm like, wait, you're so famous. It's so weird.

[A]

Wait, dad, you're, like, so famous.

[B]

It's so weird.

[A]

It's true. I guess he is very famous. Yeah.

[B]

He even visited my work the other day. Oh, he did? Yeah. I love that. Right? It was so cute. But then the guy that was, like, buying stuff, he turned around, he yelled so loud. He was like, can I get a photo?

[A]

Oh, bless.

[B]

Oh, it was really sweet.

[A]

Did they take a picture?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, that's sweet. Yeah. So in those moments, you're like, oh, yeah, yeah. Famous dad.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

That's crazy. Lola. So when it comes to, like, looking at this stuff online again, like, are we setting any boundaries? Are we just consuming all of it?

[B]

I think I was consuming all of it. Yeah.

[A]

Because it was through people, through school and. Yeah. So even as you're trying to, like, avoid it, it's still being said to you anyway.

[B]

Okay. Yeah.

[A]

And so it was in high school that you really started to feel kind of more anxious. Can you tell us more about where you were at, like, mentally?

[B]

Yeah, there. I remember when I was in ninth grade, I was like. I was. Okay.

[A]

Also, like, are you dating? Are there boys in your life or what? Tell me about that part.

[B]

Wish, Ali. I wish there is someone that I have a crush on right now. But, you know, I was talking about high school. Lola. But I want to talk about now too. Okay? Stop it. No, wait. Are you ready? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

We'll talk later. Sorry, guys.

[B]

We'll talk later.

[A]

We're going to talk about this later. So at the time in high school, I'm curious to know, like, how was your dating?

[B]

Like, that's so funny, Ally.

[A]

Cuz here. Here's the thing. For me, this is on such a smaller scale. My dad was a cop growing up, so like my whole life. And he. He would drop me off. Actually, I kind of. I felt really cool at the time. But also it made sense that no boys wanted to date me because they were scared. I was literally physically being dropped off to school in my dad's cop car before he had to go to work. He dropped me off on the way there. No, but I didn't get asked to prom. Yeah. So anyway, this isn't about that.

[B]

No, but that's so funny on that level.

[A]

Like, no one would want to date me. But I wonder, like, what was dating like for you? Did your family or where you come from affect that at all or.

[B]

Okay, like, did you have boys in your life? I definitely had in elementary school, boys that were, like, weirdly, like, obsessed. But it was just because they wanted to get to know my dad. Like, they wanted to get to be able to go to his house.

[A]

Yeah. So it's kind of the same theme as, like, friends.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Where you're like, okay, no one's really looking at me. Like, just Lola.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm, you know, the daughter of so and so. Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

And so. I also never really got asked either. I think boys were kind of scared.

[A]

Hey, listen, I think it was God's protection.

[B]

You think so?

[A]

Is that what we're going to say every time? Just to, like, God's protection help our egos and be like. No, no, no. It was definitely God protecting me.

[B]

It definitely was.

[A]

No, I think it was though.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Because if they didn't have good intentions anyway, then it's like, exactly. You might as well just not exactly.

[B]

I did have one boyfriend though.

[A]

You did?

[B]

I did. Oh, what was his name? His name was Will. Will. Same as Will. We were. I was 16. This was in 10th grade.

[A]

Okay. Was he your first kiss?

[B]

No. Who was?

[A]

When was your first kiss?

[B]

I was 15. Okay. I was 15.

[A]

That's really good, actually.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Was. I. I don't know how old I was when I had my first. Yeah. I feel like people have their first kiss at, like, tent. Like, mine.

[B]

Isn't that crazy?

[A]

Yeah. I think I was scared to kiss boys.

[B]

I was so scared. Were you scared? Yes. I was, like, freaking, what's going to happen? I was like, I have no idea what I'm doing.

[A]

Yeah, that part.

[B]

It's so funny. I would still be scared.

[A]

Yeah, I still am sometimes.

[B]

You know, I had one boyfriend. It didn't last very long.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But that's okay.

[A]

That's okay.

[B]

I don't know if I ever told you about him.

[A]

I've never heard about Will.

[B]

I've never.

[A]

This is just me asking. At this point. I don't know if anyone else cares, but I was like, wait, Lola, tell me. Yeah, okay, so we had one boyfriend freshman year of high school, then.

[B]

Yeah, this was sophomore.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah. Sophomore year.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But, yeah, that was it. And then I did, like, you know, I had crushes in high school. I had one crush, but we never really dated.

[A]

Would you, like, write his name a million times in your journal? Girl? I was weird like that. I'd be like, josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh.

[B]

I journaled Will's name a lot. You did? I was always journaling that. That's so sweet. So funny.

[A]

Okay, so back to where you were at mentally, though, in high school. Okay, so let's talk about the stuff that. Because I do know your story for the most part, but the stuff that really basically led you to Jesus. Right? Like, all these things that you kind of started to struggle with and face.

[B]

What was that like when I was 16? I don't even know what, like, triggered this or what happened. I think just, like, maybe just high school in general, but I started to really deal with depression. The only other time I dealt with that was when I was 10. I know.

[A]

Did you know that it was depression.

[B]

When you were 10?

[A]

Okay.

[B]

My mom, she was, like, very concerned. But I love your mommy. Me, too. I love her. Yeah, she's the best. I think you guys would be friends.

[A]

I think we're gonna be.

[B]

I think you are. But, yeah, I, like. I really started to deal with depression. And when I was 10, it was like, I came out of it very fast because I was so young. I was obsessed with the show, like, H2O. Okay. And so I remember it, I started watching that, just, like, distracting myself. I always just felt. I think it was just from feeling like, a shadow, too, you know? And so when I was 16, I started to experience really severe depression. Yeah. I don't even know why. I feel like I couldn't really control it. And I think a lot of people with depression maybe can relate. Yeah. Or who's dealt with it. It feels like it's like it just completely overtook me. And then I remember I had a really bad panic attack one night, and it sent me into just, like, a. Such an isolation because I was so scared to have that again.

[A]

And what were you doing? Were you just, like, in your room and it just kind of came?

[B]

Yeah, I was in my room. I remember I had school the next day, and I was really nervous to go to school a lot. It was really hard for me to, like, get to school. Yeah. And so the night before, I had a really bad panic attack, and I ended up isolating myself for, like, three months. Wow. I had, like, Life360 on my phone, and it was, like, two months. I hadn't left the house still. And people started, like, showing up my friends, and they were like, lola, why are you still home? Like, what's going on?

[A]

And you said your mom was worried at this point?

[B]

My mom was worried. My dad was really worried. I was living with my dad, and he would ask me every day to, like, go on walks and just, like, get myself out, But I literally could not leave my room. It was so crazy. Like, I was just, like, stuck. Like, I was so scared of every little thing. And I became a really bad hypochondriac, too. I always thought there was, like, something wrong with my body. And so I think also when you're, like, isolated for so long, I kind of felt like I was going crazy. So my life just felt very, like, depressing because I would wake up and then I was scared to go outside. So it was just like, the same thing every day, you know? Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. You're, like, living the same day over and over.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. And so I remember this one week, I was now in my bed for, like, three months, and I was like, okay, life just does not seem like it's getting better. I never saw myself coming out of that room. Like, I was like, I think my life is just going to be these four walls forever. Wow. And this was actually before I met Will. And I remember saying. I was like, I'm never going to be able to get a boyfriend because I can't leave my house. And so, so I started to get my mom. This was like a very hard thing for me too. I remember because I wanted to see my mom, but I couldn't leave my house. She would text me like, I miss you. And I'm like, it was really hard for me because I was like, I miss you so much. But I literally am terrified to leave, you know? So I started to experience really bad. Just thoughts of just not wanting to be here. And then, yeah, I don't know, I started to get really suicidal. I remember there was this one night and I was like, I just don't see myself coming out of this. And I started praying really hard on my Nana, cuz I didn't know God.

[A]

Funny that you were praying.

[B]

I would like write her name down. And I was like, nana, like, I just need you to help. And so I made her my screensaver. Oh my gosh. So sweet. And I was like, little did I know, like God was Jesus. I know he was just right there. It was Jesus. It was Jesus. I think I had a lot of open doors because during that time I was going two psychics and I had crystals. Wow.

[A]

What were the psychics telling you? Do you remember any of the things that they told you?

[B]

You know what's so funny, Ally, is the. The only thing they would always say is like, you're gonna be like an actress or something. And they would always just talk interesting. Like me acting.

[A]

How did that make you feel? Were you like, oh, or were you.

[B]

Like, no, I was. I remember I walked out and I was just like, I think they knew who my mom was or something, my dad. But I also don't know. But I just walked out and I never walked out being like, oh my gosh, like, I have so much hope for my future. I have all the answers now.

[A]

I know my purpose.

[B]

Yeah, it was never like that. I never felt fulfilled, obviously.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But yeah, during that time I was like looking to just find things to make me feel like I had a purpose. You needed an anchor. Yeah, I need an anchor. Yeah. Yeah, I got really dark. I actually wore all black all the time.

[A]

And now all you wear is white. All you wear is white. Jesus, it's amazing.

[B]

It's so crazy.

[A]

Ally, you're a new creation, my girl.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah.

[A]

Lola in all black. That's crazy. Ali, I don't even know who that version of you is.

[B]

I don't either.

[A]

Who is she?

[B]

She died.

[A]

She died she did. She died. Hallelujah. Thank you, God.

[B]

We love her.

[A]

We still love her. She was doing the best she could with what she knew, but.

[B]

Wow. Yeah.

[A]

That's crazy.

[B]

So I. I did come out of that, though. My friend Sarah, she would show up and she got me out of the house. I actually started going. Well, I won't say my work, but I started going to the job that I have now.

[A]

It's a good idea. I started going to my work at this place, address. My hours are so funny.

[B]

I know.

[A]

I was thinking about it, too, this morning. I was like, about the questions I was gonna ask you, and I was like, oh, I should probably not, like, say, like, where she lives or, like, even, you know, the details of our life, you know, in her life.

[B]

So I've done that, Ally. And I've had, like, in other interviews, I've gone, and they've had to cut a lot of stuff out.

[A]

Giving away your address.

[B]

Got a job here. My phone number is. That's so funny, Allie.

[A]

Sometimes we get a little too comfy. It's okay.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But, yeah, I did come out of bed finally. I finally left my house and I started.

[A]

Sweet Sarah.

[B]

Yeah. She really did help me. And so I moved back in with my mom because I just wanted to leave that room that I was in. But, yeah, I still didn't know the Lord.

[A]

Like, were you feeling better at that point or. Okay.

[B]

I did get a therapist during that time. My dad called a therapist, and then I started seeing her. And it did help. It was never, like. I had, like, a lot of, like, hope, obviously, but it was like, I was better. Sure. I didn't feel like I wanted to, like, not.

[A]

Not be here anymore.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There are resources in the world.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Aside from Jesus. That can help. That's real. It's not like a. It's Jesus and nothing else can help.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, there are things that can help. But I think what the difference is between the help of the world and the help of Jesus is the help of the world can only go so far.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's help in it. There is. Like, I believe that therapy has help. I believe that there's resources and things that you can go to that can help.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But when it comes to the help of Jesus, he can help you as far, like, it's infinite. As far as he can actually bring complete healing. That's why we need him. It's not that the world can't bring healing.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Or help. But it's like, do you want complete healing? Do you Want all the help that you need?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Do you want full deliverance?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And sometimes it's beautiful when those things come together where it's like therapy with Jesus. Therapy that's Christian based or whatever. But it's like, maybe there can be a misconception where it's like, it's not that there can't be help, but it can only take you so far. So it's interesting, like your story testifies to that, where you're like, yeah, it helped me, but you still didn't really have hope.

[B]

Exactly. Weird. That's so crazy, Ellie.

[A]

So then where's the hoe?

[B]

Exactly. Okay, keep going. Yeah. And so I remember everything was very, like, temporary. Yeah. You know, which, like, makes sense. I remember I fell in love with Hawaii. And I went on vacation one time. And I remember I was so happy there. And then I came home and I was like, how do I feel that, like, happiness again? You know, like, it was always, like, temporary little things. Yeah. It was never, like, joy all the time.

[A]

Totally.

[B]

You know? Yeah. I remember I was like 17 now. I started doing homeschool because I was so anxious. I was too scared to go to school. Wow. Okay. Yeah.

[A]

So you started getting homeschooled because you were like, I can't go to school anymore.

[B]

Wow. Yeah. It was when I was afraid to leave my house. I decided to just go online because my school was like, where is she? She's failing. She's failing school. No. I literally had to do like three extra months because I didn't do anything.

[A]

Well, that's awful.

[B]

I know, Allie.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But. Yeah. And then when I was 18, I was doing better mentally. And then something happened. When I turned 18, I went to Hawaii, my 18th birthday. And then I started dealing with a little bit of anxiety again, like, pretty bad. And then I came home from Hawaii and I don't know what happened, but it was like everything just, like, hit me again. I think what felt so hopeless in this time too was because I was already in therapy. I feel like I had already, like, tried everything I could. Yeah. And so I was like, why am I still feeling this way? And then I started having bad panic attacks again. And I would call my mom, asking to take me to the hospital a lot because I thought I was gonna die. Yeah. And it was just so much fear that I felt like I was, like, trapped in. I noticed the first thing I think the Enemy always liked attack was to isolate me totally. You know? And so I started isolating myself again.

[A]

Because you're even more vulnerable when you're. When you're isolated.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, he has, like, full reign to speak. Whatever he wants.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, you're alone, which is probably the most dangerous place you could be.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But for some reason, when you're in that space, you're like, no, this is what needs to. Like, I need to be alone.

[B]

Yes, exactly.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So true, Ali. Because no one, like, can help you when you're, like, that isolated, you know? Like, that's how I felt. But I also felt like I was too much, like, to ask for help, which I also think is why I isolated myself. Yeah. And I also didn't tell anybody that I was struggling this time. So, like, nobody really knew. And so, yeah, I was in my room probably for, like, two months. Wow.

[A]

Again. So we're going through this again.

[B]

Yeah. Wow. And I was like, okay, I'm back where I was like, three or two years ago. And I was just so scared. It started to get very dark. Everything around me just felt really dark. I remember I saw my friends, like, they would all hang out and be really happy, and I would just be like, I'm never gonna get there. Wow. Yeah. Like, that's how it felt. I was like, I don't think I'm ever gonna genuinely laugh and. Yeah. I was just so depressed. And I think also, like, the way I saw myself when I was depressed was really bad. Like, I just didn't have any self worth, you know? And, yeah, I was in my room leading up to, like, me meeting the Lord. I feel like there's a difference of, like, feeling like you don't want to be here, but then actually being like, okay, this is my only answer. Yeah. You know? Yeah. I didn't see anything past what I was going through. Right. Yeah.

[A]

And it's hard, too.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, I mean, I've never experienced what. What you went through, but I can imagine that it's probably really hard to see past all of that when it's so distracting and loud and dark and foggy. Like, you have no clarity, probably, of mind.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And those feelings are so, so heavy that it's like I can't even hear anything else.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'd imagine that that's. Yeah. Is it? Would you say that that's kind of how it was?

[B]

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I couldn't hear anything. My mind felt very, like, just so consumed of, like, darkness. Yeah. Any light. I just like, couldn't even, like, imagine feeling any better.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Yeah. And so I remember this one day, I just, like, realized that this was like, I'm Never coming out of this. Yeah. But I always felt something in my stomach. It was like a little light. I always felt. You know, I always felt something that was like, keep going. And it was like. I knew it was Jesus. And that happened, like, three days before I found him. Wow. Yeah. Because I was like. I was really being like, no, I'm never gonna make it out of this. And I thought, wow. Yeah. I never thought I was gonna turn 19. And I remember always, like, hoping that I would make it to that age. And, Yeah, I don't know. I was very scared. And then I started to experience really bad nightmares, which also makes sense, you know, I think when your mind's just so, like, anxious. It was just the only thing Now I was like, I have anxious dreams, too.

[A]

Yeah, you're like. Even when I go to sleep.

[B]

Even when I go to sleep. Yeah. And then I was just, like, scared to go to bed all the time. But I was also scared of being alive, being awake, so. That bad.

[A]

It's not funny, but it's okay.

[B]

You have to laugh sometimes, you know? Yeah. Yeah. And then I remember, it's like, yeah, this is it. Like, I don't know. I'm never coming out of this. I just made the choice. And I thought that it was going to end my life, but I never knew. Like, I just thought I was gonna die from, like, fear or something. And then, yeah, one night I was like. It was really dark. I was really scared for the morning. What year is this?

[A]

Is it last year?

[B]

Yeah, last year.

[A]

2024.

[B]

Yeah. This was, like, middle of me being 18, kind of. And so, yeah, I remember I was in my bed and everything was so dark. I was on my phone because I was always just on Tick Tock because I had nothing.

[A]

My favorite app.

[B]

I know it still is.

[A]

Whatever.

[B]

Still is my favorite. I mean, it's my favorite. It's so crazy. I was on Tick Tock and I remember I was, like, scrolling through and.

[A]

What was the kind of content that would come up on your feed?

[B]

It's so funny, Ali, because a lot of it was like. I also was kind of. I think I still had eye crystals in my room and stuff. And so some of it was like, those weird, like, tarot card videos.

[A]

Yeah, that would come up on mine, too.

[B]

Bcl. Yeah.

[A]

Or like, psychics would go live. I loved going into those because they'd be like, comment. And I'll tell you. Yeah.

[B]

I thought it was so cool. Yeah, me too. Yeah. And so, yeah, it was like, just TikToks, like, that or like, just, like, my friends videos. Just like. I don't even know. I would watch a lot of Gilmore Girls. I remember that's what I would watch, too. So some Gilmore Girls stuff would come up. But then, I don't know. It's so crazy because I feel like you have to be on Christian TikTok to see a Christian video.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Right? Yeah.

[A]

That's why I asked. Because I'm like, would anything of, like, religion come up on your feed? Really?

[B]

No. Isn't that so crazy, Ally? Like, nothing. And it wasn't even, like I was against God. I just didn't even think about God. Yeah. Like, I remember I would always be really scared. I just never knew what happened after you died, too. Like, I was like, nothing. Like, I just died and you just die. That's it. So that's probably what I. Well, I don't know. Heaven? Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, I guess. Maybe for me. I don't know what I'm, like, thinking about, like, what I thought. I'm like, I don't know what I thought.

[B]

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. It's so crazy. Or I thought it was like I would just be with my nana somehow, you know?

[A]

Your sweet Nana.

[B]

But. But, yeah. This one night, I was, like, on my phone and this video of you came up. And it was like you were looking in the camera. And I remember you were wearing this, like. I think it was the red dress video. You're wearing this red dress. And Ally was, like, she was crying into the phone and you were saying something about. I remember you said something about, like, being alive. And you were like, hey, like, just don't give up. Like, God has such a good plan for you. Like, you're meant to be here. And I remember, I saw. It was just like a light in your eyes, you know? So sweet. I always say this. Allie has, like, so much, like, love in her face. Like, anytime you, like, smile, I just, like, feel like Jesus is, like, smiling through you. It's so sweet. So I remember I would watch her video, and it was like, the first time I felt like, some sort of, like, light. Thank you, God. Yeah. It's so crazy even, like, sitting here now. It's so crazy. Ali? Yeah. I saw the video and I was like, oh, my gosh. Like, who is this girl? Like, I was like, she's such a light, like, in her eyes. Like, I need that. And I remember, like, sitting for a second, and I was like, wait, I've never thought about Jesus. Like, who is that? Yeah. And I remember I went to bed that night with, like, a small smile on my face, and I was like. I don't know, something, like, felt kind of different. And then the next day, I was scrolling on my phone, I started going on your TikTok more, and I was like, this girl loves God. This is crazy. So crazy. I was like, she loves God. You'd make these videos. I remember, like, the high Jesus, like.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, like the journals. Yeah. And those is what really, like, caught my attention so much, too, because I started journaling. Well, this is after. But I don't know, I just watch all these videos and I was like, she loves Jesus so much. And I remember, like, I was just so open. Like, I felt like my heart was like, wow. You know, it wasn't like, I was like, oh. I was just so, like, intrigued. Wow. Yeah. And I remember I was laying down to my right side and my window was open. So, you know, Jesus probably didn't come through my window. He might have. He might have. Yeah. My window was open. It was like, midnight, and I wasn't on my phone and I was going to bed, and I was laying to my right. And I remember for a second I was like, wait, I'm so scared to have, like, a nightmare or something. And I literally don't know how to explain it other than, like, it literally was like Jesus came in my room. Like, his presence, like, filled my room.

[A]

And you've never experienced that before?

[B]

Never. Wow. Never felt the presence of God, but I knew that it was him. Yeah. Which is so crazy. Yeah. You know, and so my room was so filled with the Holy Spirit. And I remember just like, I turned to my left and I was like, my eyes were closed, and I felt like Jesus just hugged me. It was like I felt like, warmth on my hand. Like, I don't know how to explain. And it felt like, you know how. We both hear God a lot. So it felt like.

[A]

Which I'm so proud of you.

[B]

Thank you, Ally.

[A]

You've grown a lot in that.

[B]

I love you.

[A]

It's so cool to witness.

[B]

So it's. I don't even think you'll be like, yeah.

[A]

I mean, I heard God say this and, you know, I heard him say that. You're like. You're always like, I heard God blank. And it's just so cool that you hear him so much now.

[B]

Wow. Thank you, Ally. It's literally, like, you help me realize that, though. So I don't think I realized it. I think it.

[A]

It takes, like, believing it, like, when you hear those kind of. That like, still voice that comes into your mind, like, believing that it's God. And I think also it's just really like in time too, you know, where it's like you kind of learn God's voice, where you're like, okay, wait, last time that happened and I heard this, like, it was God, you know, and you just kind of. Would you say that that's like, how.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

It's like you learn.

[B]

Exactly. You also help me because you said something how it won't go against scripture. Yeah. It's true, right? Yeah. And also, like, it's never going to be a voice that's like. Like it's never. I'm like, doubting it, you know, I'm like, okay. Like, it feels like peaceful.

[A]

Yes. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

And for me, I'm like, Like, if I'm like, oh, was it. Would I say that? But it's never something I was even thinking, you know? That's the best, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's so cool when you're like, that.

[A]

Couldn'T have even been my inner thought. I wouldn't have even.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I feel like the Lord told me I just heard Rescue. Like, that was the word. And so I fell in love with.

[A]

The song Rescue by Lauren Daigle.

[B]

Yeah. And then the next morning, I had no idea what I was doing.

[A]

Were you like, was that a dream?

[B]

Yes. So great. Was that a dream?

[A]

What did I just experience last night?

[B]

I remember I woke up and it was like, obviously supernatural, but I was like, I don't even know what I'm feeling right now. So crazy. And so I also felt the Lord a lot when I woke up. It literally felt like he was like sitting on my bed in front of me. So sweet. And I remember being like, okay, Jesus, like, I know I just met you last night, but I don't know what I'm doing, but I know that it was you. And I looked up on safari because I didn't even know how to pray.

[A]

Literally, me, girl. Google discipled me too. I was like, really, Ellie? What kind of Bible do I get? Where do I start in the Bible? Like, I also didn't have a lot of clarity.

[B]

I also didn't even know what a testimony was. Yeah, same.

[A]

No, same. I didn't even know what that word meant. Saying, I had to Google that.

[B]

Me. You taught me. Yes. Cuz people would be like, what's your testimony?

[A]

And I'm like, what does that mean?

[B]

That's so funny.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And so, yeah, I looked up and then I looked up. How do I. A Prayer to give my life to Jesus. And I prayed it, and I remember I just, like, so crazy.

[A]

Lola, that's awesome.

[B]

I know. You were my shepherd.

[A]

The Lord used me. Yeah, you're right.

[B]

Yeah. Like. Like everything I did, I was just, like, following in your footsteps. And then this podcast I would watch almost every night because I.

[A]

This one.

[B]

This one. Stop. Did you know that, Ellie?

[A]

I don't know if I knew that.

[B]

You watched it every night, Ali. I watched it every night. Well, that's so cool. The second I walked in, that's why I was crying. So I was like, what is going on?

[A]

Full circle.

[B]

Wow. So full circle. Ally. I watched it all the time. Time. Because I had no idea what I was doing. And no one in my family, like, go to them. So every day I'm like, okay. Like, I just literally did what you did. And then you got, like, the idea of church in my mind, and you made a video about, like, hey, Like, I don't know if it was one of your lives, but I'd also go in your lives and read the Bible with you. I don't know if I ever told you that.

[A]

I haven't done one of those in a long time.

[B]

I bought the Bible that you had, and the Bible was so intimidating, so I was like, I have no idea what I'm doing. Yeah. And so I started reading Matthew on one of your lives. And then, yeah, I'd watch his podcast because it was just like, my safe space because no one else around me knew Jesus, but it was kind of like just me and the Lord and then you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Helping me. Yeah. But, yeah, then I went to church for the first time, and I was so scared to go alone. But you made a video, and you were like, if you're nervous to go alone, just. Just do it. Yeah. You said something that, like, Jesus is with you there. And I was like, oh, my gosh, you're right.

[A]

What's crazy is, like, everything I was saying was because also, the Lord had either just recently walked me through that, or I was also walking through that at the same time. Like, I remember when I would be encouraging other people to go to church alone, I'd be like, because I'm doing it, and God's walking me through that, you know? So it's just. I think your story just testifies to how faithful God is with, like, he doesn't just want one. I mean, he'll leave the 99 for the 1, but he also has a plan to continue to save more of his kids. And so as he's, like, walking me through it. And apparently there was a grace for me to then broadcast every step I was taking on the Internet. It was also leading people like you too. It's just so cool to see that the Lord, like, really was walking us through that.

[B]

That's so sweet.

[A]

Together, kind of, you know, literally. Yeah.

[B]

Oh, that's so cool, Ali.

[A]

I love that.

[B]

Okay. So specific. Like, who he chose.

[A]

Yeah, he is.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Because he knew, for whatever reason, you would connect with me, I guess, which is cool.

[B]

So cool.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And so then we should probably fast forward to the part where we connected.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So how are we sitting on this couch together right now? Wait, I can kind of take this for a sec.

[B]

I was gonna say, I feel like.

[A]

You should take it, so whatever. However. Many months ago, when you had your interview.

[B]

Yes. With.

[A]

Was it the 700 Club? Who was it with?

[B]

Oh, who's it with?

[A]

CBN.

[B]

CBN.

[A]

CBN.

[B]

Also, I was getting so convinced not to do that interview.

[A]

That's crazy.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Wait, what? People were telling you not to do it?

[B]

Told me not to do it. Wow.

[A]

That's the only reason that we're connected right now.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Isn't that crazy? I'm so glad you did it.

[B]

Me, too. No, but.

[A]

So your interview went live.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And I was getting all of these people tagging me in one of the social clips that they had posted on Instagram, and I was like, what? Is all. I was even getting DMs about it, where people were like, Lola Sheen, and all due respect, I didn't know. I had never. I love you, but I didn't know who you were. I was like, who is Lola Sheen?

[B]

So funny.

[A]

Oh, my gosh. Sweet Lola Sheen. But, yeah, so I'm watching this video of you, like, sharing your story, and you had mentioned me in your interview, and that's why people were tagging me so much, because they were like, ali, you have no idea how much you were a part of Lola's testimony and her story of being saved. And so when I saw that video, I had clicked on your page, saw that you also lived here. I think I, like, I sent you a voice memo just encouraging you and being like, what the heck? This is such an honor that the Lord used me in such a way. And then I felt led to ask you if you had any kind of, like, community or if you were going to a church. And you told me that you were. You were, like, going to a church at that time, but you didn't have, like, a ton of Community. And it was still not super certain about where you were going. And so I was like, well, where do you live? And you lived very close to where I lived, which was crazy.

[B]

It's so close.

[A]

Insane. And you were actually physically on the way to church of where me and Ash go to. And so that was on a Saturday. And I was like, well, I guess we're picking you up tomorrow and we're all going to church. And so we picked you up the next day, and we went to church the next day, and the rest was history. And now you couldn't be more intertwined with our community at church. And also, how. How has that experience been, like, since being plugged in at our church, Ali.

[B]

It literally changed my entire life.

[A]

So glad.

[B]

Like, I have so many moments, Ali, where I'm just, like, with God. And I'm just like. I don't say anything because I'm like, I just don't know how to thank you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I prayed every day for one sister in Christ and a spiritual family. I was like, that's all I need, God. I just want one sister that I can just walk with. And I pray for spiritual parents. And then he gave me so many.

[A]

Gave you more than that.

[B]

And not only did he give me, like, a sister in Christ, but you. I was like, you're so sweet, Ellie. It's so.

[A]

That is crazy.

[B]

I still can't fathom it.

[A]

And I'll say one more thing. Oh, we could literally talk for, like, another hour. We can't. We're rapping.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Is that video that I made in my kitchen. I was, like, in the middle of, literally speaking, sweeping my floor or something, like, doing the most normal, mundane, like, dishes, whatever it was. And all of a sudden, out of the blue, I just felt this burden from God. It physically brought me to tears. Like, I was, like, almost on the floor about it. That's how burdened I felt. And I didn't even understand it. Like, I didn't know what it was or why I felt so burdened out of nowhere. But I felt the Lord be like, you have to make this video, and I need you to give people hope. I believe it was me, too. You for sure. God was like, I need you to reach my girl Lola. But I can't even.

[B]

I don't.

[A]

There's had to have been more. But this is just so crazy for me to witness, because a lot of times it's like, you know, we do things and we feel burdens from God to do, but we don't always See, like, the immediate impact, which is fine. You know, it's really comes down to just obedience, being like, okay, God, I'm just gonna do this. But I felt the Lord's heart for you with making that video. Like, I know that that was the heart of God for you in that it's just as rewarding for me being able to be like, oh my gosh, because of that burden I was feeling. And I didn't even understand why, like, I. He.

[B]

It.

[A]

It was also the grace of God that he let me see why.

[B]

I know. He let me see why and meet.

[A]

You and become friends with you.

[B]

I know.

[A]

So it's just really sweet of God.

[B]

That's crazy, Ally.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, I never would have thought I'd be able to. Cuz I always prayed and I would ask God if I can run into you and be like, I'm like, I need to tell her you used her to save my life. And I would pray all the time about you, Ali. And I'm like, little did I know you saw us being here today.

[A]

It's crazy. It's supernatural, actually.

[B]

I could literally talk about it for the rest of my life.

[A]

Thank you, God, sister. I'm so proud of you.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

I'm also so proud of you because I know that it hasn't been easy. And I just want to honor you in how much you really are so hungry for Jesus. Like, every day you're like, I just need him. And I'm telling you, you will be able to do anything in your life as long as you're in that heart posture of like, all I need is Jesus and you're doing it.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

I'm really proud of you. And he's so proud of you for how much you really value, like, you fear God, like, above all else. It's crazy. Like, the 180 of you coming from a place of, like, all you did was fear people and, like, what people had to say. And I'm sure there's still temptation for that. But what I see from you the most is, like, fear of God. Like, you really just want to do right by God and you want to do what makes him proud. And so, yeah, I'm just really proud of you for that.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

You're faithful, honey. And you're so special, and I'm so excited to see what the Lord does with your life.

[B]

That means everything to me. Thank you for having me.

[A]

Thanks for coming.

[B]

This was literally the biggest gift of my life.

[A]

Thank you, Jesus. This was so sweet, Lola.

[B]

This was so Special guys.

[A]

You can also find Lola on socials. She has her own podcast as well. Will you tell us the name of your page?

[B]

Podcast?

[A]

Where can we find it?

[B]

Love you, Ali. It's called Heavenly Bonded. I only have two videos.

[A]

It's on YouTube.

[B]

It's on YouTube. You can find it there.

[A]

Yeah, you guys should check it out.

[B]

I love you, Lola. I love you, Ally. You need to open your stuffed animal.

[A]

I know, I didn't. Is it a stuffed animal?

[B]

Wait, I don't.

[A]

Oh my gosh. It literally when I. Lola brings me a gift on my own podcast. What is that?

[B]

It was a gift to be here.

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

But. But you're so sweet. You didn't have to do this.

[A]

All I did was was get you a coffee. I feel like it's not fair.

[B]

Stop. This is so pretty. When I saw this, I was like, that just reminds me of atl. It's perfect, isn't it? So cute. I love him.

[A]

Is it a boy or a girl? I think it's a boy.

[B]

I think it's a boy. Oh, he's everything. So cute.

[A]

Right, Lola?

[B]

Thank you. Of course. Ally, is he a mouse or a bear? I think he's a bear. Wait, I'm going to just put him on.

[A]

I'm going to put him on my shelf.

[B]

A lot of stuffed animals there. Their faces are kind of look funny.

[A]

Okay, this one was the least funny looking. That's why I reminded you of me.

[B]

Like. No, but they all look funny. Oh. But it took me 20 minutes to pick the right one.

[A]

Oh, my gosh. Well, I love you. Thank you.

[B]

Thank you for everything.

[A]

Oh, my gosh. This was so fun. Guys, thank you for being here. Thank you for tuning in. Thank you for loving my sweet girl, Lola. Guys, can we do something cool today? Can we show somebody how cool Jesus is? Can we walk more like him? Talk more like him? Be more like Jesus? We love you guys. And I will see you in the next episode. Bye.

[B]

Bye.

[A]

Are some of y' all still listening? Okay, if you're still here, that means you're a real one. Which is why I'm about to share this with you. If you've already caught up on all the episodes so far and you don't want to wait until next Friday for a new one, I have really good news for you. Subscribe to our Patreon to get early access to the episodes every week, early access to merch launches or any other exciting news, and receive personal encouraging messages or Bible verses from us. Subscribe to Our [e-mail] C backslash CWCOI I do also want to mention that there is a way to give to the podcast, so if you ever feel led to donate, it blesses me so much and it helps allow the podcast to keep running. You can donate to our [e-mail]. cWCOI we appreciate y' all and we love you so, so much.