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So this is just me admitting that every year I tell myself I'll get better about meal planning. And every year, life gets even busier than the year before, and it all falls apart. And what finally clicked for me is realizing meals don't have to look one specific way. They just have to fit your lifestyle. That's why Marley Spoon does really well for me. And what I love is that Marley Spoon actually adapts with you from breakfast to dinner and even those in between snack moments. So obviously, you guys know that I'm entering my fitness era, and it's not just about going to the gym, but it's also about making sure that I'm having good quality meals. And so Marley Spoon has actually helped me so much with my busy schedule and kind of taking off the pressure of feeling like I have to figure it out. And so what's been fun with Marley Spoon is it's allowed me to have the freedom to try other things while being, like, guided through it. Because they send you everything that you need. There's directions that come with it, and they're really easy to put together with. Of my recent favorites that has actually been rocking my world is their low carb beef tacos. Okay, I'm going to freak out. They are so good. They look like little restaurant tacos. Way better than the tacos I make. Go to marley spoon.com offer coffee for 45% off your first order and free delivery. That's right. You get 45% off your first order and Free delivery. That's marley spoon.com offer coffee. Instacart makes grocery shopping easier. And just because you're not doing the shopping yourself doesn't mean you don't care how it's done. With Instacart Shopper notes, you can get particular about what you want right in the app, like rotisserie chicken. That's extra crispy steak with marbling the Romans would have loved, and lettuce you'd actually pick yourself. Just leave a note for your shopper so they can get it right for you without having to ask. That way you can get groceries just how you like to add. Download the Instacart app and shop today. Hey, everybody. Hey, guys. Welcome back to another episode of Christ with Coffee on Ice. I'm your host, Ali. Yo. So there's a joy and honor to be here with you guys. Why do I have to go through that so fast? Why'd I do that? Why did I do that? How's he doing that? How's he pulling that? I won't explain it. If you know, you know. If you don't know what I'm referring to, that's fine. How's he. How's he pulling that? How's he doing that? Anyway, that's what it was kind of giving. Why'd I do that? Why did I do that? Guys, welcome back to another episode of Christ with Coffee on Ice. It's not Coffee with Christ on Ice. It's Christ with Coffee on Ice. I know y' all aren't walking around telling people that. We're just. We're out here on the podcast putting Jesus on ice. You guys would never do that, right? It's okay if you have. It's a tongue twister. You know? It's a tongue twister. I get it. It's a big mouthful, and even saying like cwcoi is still a mouthful, so there's just no option around it. Anyway, guys, how are you doing? How you feeling today? I feel good. Thanks for asking. I feel good. I'm glad that you're doing good. If you're doing okay, that's all right. That's okay. But if you're doing good, good. If you're doing great, great. I love to hear it. I'm so glad you're doing great. Praise Jesus Christ of Nazareth. Best guy in the world, by the way, if you've never heard of him, he rocks. Oh, my gosh. He gives me life, like. Like fresh breath in my lungs whenever I feel stale. Like, to the ones who know, if you get it, you get it. If you don't, that's fine. But, like, whenever I feel stale, stale, like, that's the only word I can really use to describe how I feel. Sometimes the Lord just really brings. He brings a refreshing. He brings the. The freshness. He brings back the. The moisture to my bread that is stale. Whatever. He's the best. Anyway, so I pray away all staleness in Jesus name, and I pray that the Holy Spirit. Spirit. The Holy Spirit. That the Holy Spirit brings back that moisture to your loaf of bread. Amen. Hallelujah. The bread of life, Lord. Oh, you're so good, guys, I don't know what's happening today, but anyway, I mean, I've barely drank any of my coffee. It's not my coffee. It's literally the Holy Ghost. But we do have our coffee today. We have our Christ with coffee on ice. There's not much ice left, but it's there. We have our Christ. We have our cutesy little Bible, which I'm matching today. Oh, okay. I didn't know that this was the color of, like, spring, but this is totally the color of this year's spring because I'm seeing it everywhere. No one told me that. But it's what I'm going off of. Simple observation of looking around. I've gone to a couple. Why did that just make me laugh? I've gone to a couple malls. I've shopped around a little bit. And there's just a lot of yellow going around around right now. Like pastel yellow, like light yellow. Am I getting strong? Is that my freaking tricep right there? What? Guys, watch out. I am. Your girl's getting buff. Look at my. Look at my biceps. I've been going to the gym, y'. All. Okay, I've been talking to my trainer. Anyway, yeah, yellow is spring. Whatever. We're moving on. Who cares? I have been working out with my trainer. Okay? I've told you guys that. Live, laugh. Love her. Her name's Lindsay. She rocks. And we've been working out three times a week. And now I'm thinking about upping it to four times a week because I really feel like this has become like an actual part of my lifestyle. Like, this is how I live. And I think I've gotten my body into a good rhythm of being pretty used to working out every week. I've been very consistent for months now of doing intense weight training three times a week. But I'm kind of like chilling now. Like, even when I don't set my alarm to get up early in the morning, my body wants to get up early in the morning. And I. I just feel like moving already, which is awesome. So my body's like, expecting it now. She's like, let's go, girl. And so that's a good sign. I love that. I feel like I'm ready to amp it up a little bit. And so I'm thinking about doing weight training like four times a week now instead of three. I don't know. Keep you posted, but watch out. I'm gonna be coming up on the podcast with like a eight pack freakin washboard abs next time. Just kidding, guys. You will never see my abs. That is not appropriate. And that's not what the podcast is about. Please. This podcast is about Jesus, not my abs. You guys are weird for that. Just kidding. I actually have no idea what energy I'm giving you guys today. I don't know what this is. Take it if you want, if you don't. I get it. What's going on? Anyway? Hey, what are we talking about? Today, Holy Spirit, what are we gonna talk about today? Well, I'm gonna be honest. I really loved last week's episode, and I feel like a lot of you guys were liking it, too. About, like, kind of just walking through recent scripture that I've been personally reading with the Lord and just, like, elaborating, building off of. Obviously, we've done a lot of episodes where we've just simply read scripture, but I haven't done a whole lot of, like, scripture and then, like, breaking it down, breaking it down, breaking it down. Anyway, so maybe we'll do a little bit more of that today. But actually, before we do anything, first and foremost, I would love to just. Okay, see, now I'm getting really cocky, and I keep looking at my triceps. I keep looking at my arms. I better watch out, because I can't be getting all their vanity. I rebuke you in Jesus name. No, but you know what it is, is I'm just proud of myself. I've never had a tricep in my life, And I'm not even one. Like, I know we technically are supposed to have two. I've never even had one tricep in my life. Let a girl be excited and proud of herself. Okay? I'm not vain. I'm just, like, stoked that I have a tricep. I have two of them now. I didn't even have one. Okay, Technically, I had triceps before. They were just very, very, very little. You could barely see them. Okay, we need to actually, like, get to a place of this episode making any sense. So I promise we're going to get there. Let's pray. Okay. Jesus. Lord, I thank you. I almost was going to say for triceps, and then I was like, that's so dumb. Ally, lock in. Okay. I'm so glad I didn't say that. Lord, I thank you for today. God, I thank you for joy of the Lord. Jesus, I thank you for your joy. I thank you for your joy. I thank you for your joy. Oh, my gosh, it's intoxicating. It's the best thing ever. Lord, we thank you for your gift of joy. God, thank you that it is actually in faith that we receive joy and we get to celebrate who you are and we get to receive your spirit today, Jesus. And so, God, I just pray that for my friend on the other side of this podcast. God, I pray for joy of the Lord. God, I thank you for your holy spirit that is falling on them right now in Jesus name. God, I. I pray that Your spirit falls on them, refreshes their soul, God, even as I was saying at the beginning of this episode, like, add that moisture back to their stale bread. But really, Lord, I'm asking for a refreshing of their spirit in the ways that they need refreshing, God, only you know that. And so I pray that that's what you do right now. In Jesus name, God, I pray that this episode blesses them deeply, God, that it is an episode that sticks with them for whatever reason. That is whatever is said, God, I pray that you have something in this episode for every single person who's tuning in. And, Lord, I thank you that everything that you use that is the truth is that you have something for all of us. And so, God, even if that's just like two minutes out of the episode, if that's the whole episode in itself, hallelujah. But, God, I pray that there is something in this episode for every single listener. Jesus, I thank you, God. It is an honor to be used as a vessel, Lord, I pray that you continue to just purify me, Lord Jesus. Use me as an empty vessel, God. I want to be used by you and you alone. Lord. Help me get out of my own way, God, I pray that it is you and you alone. It is only your spirit. It is you speaking directly to your children. God, I thank you for the gift of today, Lord. I thank you that it is Friday. I thank you that we are alive, that we have breath in our lungs. Jesus. And I bless my friend on the other end of this podcast. I bless them in Jesus name, God. I bless their family, God, I declare health and healing in the mighty name of Jesus. I plead the blood of Jesus over them and their family. I rebuke sickness. I rebuke disease. I rebuke any demonic attacks, any attempts of the enemy. I declare and I demand them to go back to the pits of hell where they belong, where they will not return. God, I thank you that it is promised in your word that any tactics of the enemy, any attempts of the enemy against those who are loved by you and love you will not prosper in Jesus name. And so, God, I declare that truth over them and their family in the mighty name of Christ Jesus, that no weapon formed against them will prosper today, tomorrow, or for the rest of their lives. In Jesus name. Amen. Protection of the Lord. God, protect them. Amen. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, God. Okay, guys, today. Whoo. That was fun. I liked that. Whatever just happened, I know y' all are feeling it. That was fun. Holy Spirit, what are we doing today? Yeah, we're gonna read the Bible a little bit. We're gonna read the Bible a little bit. What part of the Bible are we, are we reading, Ali? I don't know. Parts that I've highlighted probably. Okay, so a few episodes ago, obviously I've shared with you guys that I am journeying through reading the Bible. What was that sentence? Of course I'm reading the Bible. But like reading the Bible through and through, from the front of the COVID to the back of the COVID through from Genesis to Revelation through and through. I don't know how long that's going to take me, but we're still working through it. Anyway, a few episodes ago, I shared that with you guys and specifically I was referring to one of these scriptures about. Who was it? Was it Abraham? Yeah, it was Abraham when he was going back and forth with God before destroying Sodom and Gomorrah. And he was like, lord, will you sweep away both the righteous and the wicked? Suppose you find 50 righteous people living there in the city, will you still sweep it away and not spare it for their sake? Surely you wouldn't do such a thing destroying the righteous along with the wicked. And then the Lord replied, If I find 50 righteous people in Sodom, I will spare the entire city for their sake. And then Abraham spoke again and he was like, okay, well what if you find like, I don't know, 40 people? And then God was like, I will not destroy it if I find 45 righteous people. He said, 45. Okay, after that whole back and forth ping ponging moment between Abraham and God where God was basically saying that he will not destroy an entire city for the sake of any righteous people being in it. Because as him and Abraham are going back and forth, each time Abraham goes back to the Lord, he's bringing back a lower number. He's like, okay, what about 45? Okay, what about 30? What about 20? What about 10? And God is like, at the end of it, he goes, then I will not destroy it for the sake of 10. And so in this, God's justice is always tempered with mercy is what this verse is saying. Okay? And that also God's concern isn't just a number game of how many righteous people there are, but it's about character, period. So it's not about how many righteous people in God's sight, it's about character. It's about fruit, it's about heart posture. It's about who you are. Okay? And so anyway, after that interaction, we're now going into Genesis 19 and I would love to start reading there. And then we just kind of, like, flow through it and we talk and we discuss, and I can even share with you guys some things that I learned as I was reading the scripture. Some of my little notes on the side here. So if you are at a place where you can read your Bible with me, I would love that. I actually think that it would be the most effective for you. If you're not in a place to read it with me, it's totally fine. I'm happy to read it to you. But if you are available to read your Bible and sit down and kind of study it and, like, read alongside and take notes, that's amazing. You should do that. I'd love for you to do that. And just as a reminder, I am reading the NLT translation, which is the new living translation. So if yours looks a little different, that's totally okay. But that is the translation that I read and I will be reading from. So we're going to start at the top of Genesis 19. This says, Sodom and Gomorrah is destroyed. So that evening, the two angels came to the entrance of the city of Sodom. Lot was sitting there, and when he saw them, he stood up to meet them. Then he welcomed them and bowed his face to the ground. My lords, he said, come to my home to wash your feet and be my guests for the night. You may then get up early in the morning and be on your way again. Oh, no, they replied, we'll just spend the night out here in the city square. But Lot insisted. So at last they went home with him. Lot prepared a feast for them, complete with fresh bread made without yeast. And they ate. But before they retired for the night, all the men of Sodom, young and old, came from all over the city and surrounded the house. They shouted to Lot, where are the men who came and spent the night with you? Bring them out to us so we can have sex with them. Okay, let's stop right there. What? Yeah. Okay. We're diving in today, guys. We're diving in. So what just happened? Now I'm gonna be transparent. I'm gonna say that the first time that I read this verse, I assumed that these men were not straight, right? Because I'm like, okay, they're not straight. Then what's going on? Right? But the truth to this scripture is. Okay, bear with me. So the culture of Sodom was so far gone that this actually wasn't about, like, attraction. This was actually more about dominating and humiliating outsiders. And so it's awful. It's evil, it's gross, it's disturbing. Actually, this is very disturbing. But this is actually supposed to show us just how far gone and corrupt and wicked the culture was in this city is that if any outsiders came into Sodom, the men of that city being dominating and whatever, again, it's pride. Here we are again with pride and power and ego. That was our issue from the beginning and it's still it. It still was then, it still is now, but it was actually just about dominating and humiliating anyone that came in from the outside. And so this was actually a violent assertion of power. It was about power. That's what it was about is they wanted to humiliate and bring shame to anybody who came in from another place. And so that's why they were insisting on having sex with these angels. Super weird, super creepy, super not okay. But again, it's an emphasis of just how evil and corrupt the culture was in this place. So the people of this city had no respect for others and it was just corruption and cruelty. That is what this verse is speaking to I'm going to tell you guys about one of my favorite brands. It's Cozy Earth. I have been a fan of Cozy Earth before they ever even knew who I was. So the fact that this episode is sponsored by Cozy Earth is like the best. I specifically have a lot of experience with their pajamas and their socks, but they actually offer other things like comforters, which is actually a foundational Cozy Earth essential. So this march, Cozy Earth crafts every piece with care. From soft supportive socks for your steps through the day to breathable comforters that help you rest deeply at night. Every detail is intentional so your everyday feels quietly elevated. I think another thing that makes Cozy Earth so credible is they have a risk free purchase so they have a 100 night sleep trial. Returns are easy, but after feeling this level of comfort you won't want to let them go. 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They also host worship events and fun gatherings that create a true sense of community. It's a place you can be known, challenged and can ultimately change the culture of your entire campus. I wish that I got the college experience one but if I were to have gotten the college experience and I were to wish for it, it would be because there would be something like this available. Like if there was an opportunity to know Gen Jesus and to be in community of people who love Jesus while also being in college, that would have been my dream. So here's the really cool part too. If there isn't a Delight chapter already on your campus, you could actually be the one to start it. You fill out an interest form, you'll get connected with your own Delight coach who will equip you and train you to build a team, become an official campus org and hopefully see hundreds of girls gathering in the name of Jesus at your school. If you get the sense that God is calling you to be a leader on your campus, head to delightministries.com start a delight to get started today and it's really crazy to think about what God can do with your simple yes, that's delightministries.com start a delight to see a move of God on your campus. So Lot stepped outside to talk to them, shutting the door behind him. Please my brothers, he begged, don't do such a wicked thing. Look, I have two virgin daughters. Let me bring them out to you and you can do with them as you wish. But please leave these men alone, for they are my guests and are under my protection. Stand back. They shouted. This fellow came to town as an outsider and now he's acting like our judge. We'll treat you far worse than those other men. And they lunged toward Lot to break down the door. But the two angels reached out, pulled Lot into the house and bolted the door. Then they blinded all the men, young and old, who were trying to get in the door of the house. So they gave up trying to get inside. Meanwhile, the angels questioned Lot. Do you have any other relatives here in the city? They asked. Get them out of this place, your sons in law, sons, daughters or anyone else, for we are about to destroy this city completely. The outcry against this place is so great it has reached the Lord and has sent us to destroy It. So Lot rushed out to tell his daughter's, quick, get out of the city. The Lord is about to destroy it. But the young men thought he was only joking. At dawn the next morning, the angels became insistent. Hurry, they said to Lot. Take your wife and your two daughters who are here. Get out right now or you will be swept away in the destruction of the city. When Lot still hesitated, the angel seized his hand and the hands of his wife and two daughters and rushed them to safety outside of the city, for the Lord was merciful. When they were safely out of the city, one of the angels ordered, run for your lives and don't look back or stop anywhere in the valley. Escape to the mountains or you will be swept away. Oh no, my Lord, Lot begged. You have been so gracious to me and saved my life, and you have shown such great kindness. But I cannot go to the mountains. Disaster will catch up to me there, and I will soon die. See, there is a small village nearby. Please let me go there instead. Don't you see how small it is? Then my life will be saved. Alright, the angel said, I will grant your request. I will not destroy the little village. But hurry, escape to it, for I can do nothing until you arrive there. This explains why the village was known as Zoar, which means little place. Okay, stop. Everybody stop. I had a question at this point, I don't know if this is a question that anyone else thought, but the question that I had is like, why is God willing to negotiate? Because in this moment, okay, it's obvious that through the angels, but from God, Lot was told to go to the mountains. That was what God was saying Lot needed to do. And Lot kind of resisted and argued and said, I can't go to the mountains. I will literally die there. Please let me go to this little village instead. Like, my thought was like, why? Why was God willing to negotiate with Lot? Where it's like, okay, bro, if God is telling you to go to the mountains, it's probably because you're going to be okay. He's not going to encourage you to go to the mountains if you're gonna die there. Because the whole point of getting you out of this place is so that you don't die, right? So for me, I was like, why was God willing to be like, all right, you can go to the little village? And the truth is, is God, he's so sweet. Can we remember that? God is so sweet, okay? And he does have patience with human fear, okay? So even when we are fearful, this is such a Good lesson. And such a good reminder that even when we are fearful, okay, Even when, like, we probably should know better and we probably should have more faith, God actually does have so much patience with us when we're in our human fear. He said okay to going to the small village to meet Lot where he was at. So God was like, okay, fine. Because God was willing to meet Lot where he was at, which was. He was scared. Okay? He was scared. I mean, imagine. Imagine being surrounded by all these evil people, and then these angels come down. That's crazy in itself, but these angels come down and they're like, you need to leave this place. The place that he's always. That he's known. I'm sure that, like, obviously, with how corrupt and evil this place was, like, it still was his home for so long. And so I'm sure there's some hesitation in him of being like, but, like, will where I'm going next be better than this? Or, like, what if it's worse? Like, I don't know. There's always that uncertainty when God's calling you out of a place and bringing you somewhere else. You know, obviously, we want to have faith that it's, like, for better, but we don't always know that. Like, there is always that lingering fear in the back of our heads of, like, okay, but what if it's actually worse? Like, what if I'm even more uncomfortable where I'm going than, like, where I've been? And granted, yes, where I've been hasn't been the best, but, like, that. That sounds scarier to, like, go out into the unknown, which is what God was telling Lot and his family to do, which is probably. I'm not saying this is right. This is just Ali thinking, but maybe that's why Lot was a little hesitant and, like, was lacking belief and being like, should I? And then the angels, like, tied up his hands in the hands of his family and was like, go. So I don't know. Maybe that's why Lot was kind of like, I don't know. I'm scared because the uncertainty is scarier than just, like, living in the reality of where you're at, whether it's bad or not. You know what I mean? So anyway, it's just sweet that God, like, had compassion. That that's what was demonstrated here is that God actually has compassion for Lot and was willing to be like, okay, and meet Lot where he was at. And so Lot was obviously already really overwhelmed and terrified by everything that was happening and even getting the news that like, everything was going to be destroyed. Yeah, it's just, like, a scary thing. Like, homeboy was probably traumatized. He's probably like, what is going on? And so Lot was already overwhelmed and terrified. And so God said, all right, I will fetch you a bone. And, like, that is God's heart, right? It's like, yes, we are supposed to act in obedience, and we are supposed to be faithful, and we're supposed to have faith and be like, okay, when God says, go, we go. But sometimes we don't, or sometimes we're hesitant, or sometimes we try to negotiate and be like, okay, God, I'll go, but can I please go this way? And, like, he's such a compassionate dad that sometimes he'll be like, all right, it's not gonna really alter. Like, I'm sovereign. Like, I can do it. It's not going, like, massively change anything because I'm the one in control anyway. So, like, okay, fine, I'll let you have this. But, like, we still got to be on the path, right? And so that's. That's what God was demonstrating there. And I think that that's so sweet. And that was such a small detail that, like, I don't think I would have ever noticed had I not slowed down and asked that question of, like, wait, I wonder why God was so willing to actually let Lot go to the small village instead of the mountains. Like, why wasn't God just, like, you need to listen to me. Because, like, yeah, he can be a dad that disciplines and says, you can. You need to listen to me. But he's also a dad with a heart, okay? He has a heart, and he has patience with us when we're afraid, and he has compassion. And so that's what I got from that part, and I think it's really sweet. And so another reminder in that is that sometimes God does accommodate our weaknesses. So Lot reached the village just as the sun was raising over the horizon. And then the Lord rained down fire and burning sulfur from the sky on Sodom and Gomorrah. He utterly destroyed them, along with the other cities and villages of the plain, wiping out all the people and every bit of Ve. But Lot's wife looked back as she was following behind him, and she turned into a pillar of salt. Okay? So I think a lot of us. If you don't, it's totally okay. But I think a lot of us know this one particular part of scripture. Like, a lot of people use this story as, like, don't look back, you know? And granted, yes, like, don't look back. But also I think what really has happened in this scripture right here is it's not just like don't look back at the past. It's not as simple as that. I actually believe it's that the reason that Lot's wife turned around and the reason that the result of her turning around was her turning into a pillar of salt is because it was actually exposing her heart. In that moment, Sodom and Gomorrah was so corrupt, so evil, so filthy, the people there had no respect for others. It was literally just corruption and cruelty. That is why God had to burn it to the ground. Was it was because it was so repulsively evil. You guys, this place was nasty. I think what this scripture is actually revealing is that Lot's wife, there actually was some evil in her heart. Because how in the world could you look back? Like her looking back was revealing a part of her heart of like, oh, but I'm gonna miss it a little bit. It like the fact that she could turn around and like needed to take one more look of a place that was so evil was actually exposing her heart that there was evil in her heart. Because for some reason she low key was gonna kind of miss a place like that, culture like that. So Lot's wife was still tied to this place. That's what was being said in her turning around is that she was actually still tied to this place emotionally. She was told to leave a life behind that's tied to destruction. And so she did that, but she was still tied to it emotionally enough to turn around. After the angels warned them and said, do not turn around or you will die. Literally. I mean, where was it? Run for your lives and do not look back or stop anywhere in the valley. Escape to the mountains or you will be swept away. They said that. So homegirl did the opposite and she got swept away. She got turned into a pillar of salt, which is crazy. Okay, so when we cling, this is also like a lesson that we could even take from this is that when we cling to what we're supposed to move on from, we can get stuck. Sure. That's an interpretation for sure. But I think the biggest thing is it's heart posture. Like, I think that really was revealing to her that her she was still emotionally tied to a season that was dead and evil and no good for her. And so, yeah, I think that that could totally apply to our lives, is that when we cling to ideas or like memories or seasons of our lives that God has so Obviously taken us out of. If it was for all the wrong reasons, and he's pulling us out of it for all the right reasons, we need to stay there. And if there is an emotional tie to a season that was so evil, that's a place in our hearts that we need the Lord to heal us in. If that is something that you're recognizing in yourself, that is something you need to bring to the Lord and be like, okay, I'm still emotionally tied to a time of my life that was not good. Like, that was a time of my life that didn't honor you. Lord, whether this is like, BC you before Christ, before you were saved, if that's your story and you still kind of fantasize and think about and look back on those days as, like, the good old days or whatever that is, or like, you get random urges of just, like, missing it. That is a part of your heart that you should bring to the Lord and be like, God, this isn't okay. Like, I shouldn't be emotionally tied to that anymore. Like, you took me out of it for a reason, and it was because it was no good for me. And so help. I have so much faith that the Holy Spirit can help walk you through that. But transparency and honesty with the Lord, if that is something that you do or if that's something you've realized you've, like, fallen to, is like, whoa. I, like, sometimes kind of romanticize these parts of my life when honestly, God took me out of that. And I know it was because it was for my good to be brought out of that season and out of that lifestyle, out of that Sodom and Gomorrah. You know what I mean? What if my friends secretly hate me? Something bad will happen if I don't do this. Does God really still love me after what I've done? Do you ever have thoughts like these? I'm talking about unwanted thoughts that play on loop in your mind over and over. Thoughts like that can be signs of ocd, but because OCD is so misunderstood, a lot of people don't even know that it can show up that way. OCD is a common, highly misunderstood mental health condition that causes intrusive thoughts and a powerful urge to do something to neutralize those thoughts. The thing is, is these behaviors only provide term relief. The unwanted thoughts, fears, and doubts always come back, and that's why OCD can be so debilitating. The good news is OCD is highly treatable with a specific kind of therapy called erp, or Exposure and Response Prevention. And that's why I want to tell you about NO cd. So NOCD is the world's leading provider of OCD treatment and all of their licensed therapists truly understand OCD and specialize in ERP therapy. Therapy with no CD is 100% virtual, covered by insurance for over 138 million Americans and includes support between sessions so you're never facing OCD alone. To learn more about starting OCD therapy with NOCD, go to nocd.com and book a free call with their team. That's n o c d.com to learn more and start getting help. You guys I went to the mall with my sister a couple weeks ago. Just going to the mall and shopping around in person is so foreign to me now because I do so much of my shopping online. But one thing that I've never been lucky with with shopping online is like home stuff. Like have you ever bought something for your house that looked great in the store and terrible once you got home? Because that's happened to me almost every time. But guys, believe it or not, there actually is a better way to buy blinds, shades, shutters and drapery and it's called three Day Blinds. So they are the leading manufacturer of high quality custom window treatments in the US and right now if you use my URL three day blinds.com coffee they are running a buy one get one 50% off deal. So three day blinds has a local professionally trained design consultants who have an average of 10 plus years of experience that provide expert guidance on the right blinds for you in the comfort of your home. I think the thing that I love most about three day Blinds is the convenience of it and how obvious it is that there is serious intentionality and care that goes into the blinds right now. Get quality window treatments that fit your budget with three day blinds. Head to three day blinds.com Coffee for their buy one get one 50% off deal on custom blinds, shades, shutters and drapery for a free no charge, no obligation consultation. Just head to three day blinds.com coffee one last time. That's buy one get one 50 off when you head to the number 3D a Y blinds.com coffee moving on. We are now in Genesis 19:30. So afterward lot left Zoar because he was afraid of the people there and he went to live in a cave in the mountains with his two daughters. Okay, so this part is like funny to me because like homeboy ended up just doing the thing that God told him to do from the get go. So it seems that Zoar so the Tiny village that he so desperately wanted to go to didn't actually end up being what he thought it was going to be. So it sounds like the people there kind of sucked because apparently he was afraid of the people there. And so he went to live in a cave in the mountains with his two daughters, just as the Lord had told him to, which is funny. So he ended up going back to what God originally told him to do anyway. And then one day, the older daughter. Okay, this part gets a little. There's more weird sex, but we're just gonna read it. Okay? So one day the older daughter said to her sister, but there's a message, and we're gonna break it down. Okay, guys, we're all adults here. It's fine. It's the Bible. It's our dad talking to us, okay? There's lessons in this that we need to learn from, okay? So one day the older daughter said to her sister, there are no men left anywhere in this entire area, so we can't get married like everyone else else. And our father will soon be too old to have children. Come, let's get him drunk with wine. And then we will have sex with him. That way, we will preserve our family line through our father. So that night, they got him drunk with wine, and the older daughter went in and had intercourse with her father. He was unaware of her lying down or getting up again. Okay, so that sounds like Lot was so intoxicated that he has no recollection of what happened. He does not remember his daughter laying down with him or getting up again. So homeboy has no idea what just happened. Okay, so the next morning, the older daughter said to her younger sister, I had sex with our father last night. Let's get him drunk with wine again tonight. And you go in and have sex with him. That way, we will preserve our family line through our father. So that night, they got him drunk with wine again, and the younger daughter went in and had intercourse with him. As before, he was unaware of her lying down or getting up again. So let's stop right there. It's okay, guys. It's okay. It's. It's gross. Like, that sucks. But again, there's an underlying message in this. Okay? Incest, isn't it? That's not it. Okay. Nope, we don't want that. But what's being said in these scriptures right now is that the daughters were hopeless and they were desperate. Okay? So imagine they go through what they go through, okay? The evil, corrupt, awful city that they were living in just got destroyed. They Tried to go to this cute little town that didn't end up being so cute because all the people there scared them and they sucked. And so now they have to live in a cave in a mountain. Okay? And so the daughters at that point are like, bro, how are we ever going to continue our lineage? Because one thing to also know about this time is that the ancient world, lineage and survival was most important at that time. So for families, like, it was actually really important for survival and just like, lineage to keep it going, the family tree. And I would assume that if that didn't happen, it would be a disgrace and. Or their bloodline would die. And so it wasn't even just about the girls being like, but we want to get married and have babies. Like. Like, it was actually mostly about them being like, how are we going to make sure that our family survives? It was more about survival and lineage than it was about anything else. Okay? So, yeah, it was super gross that it was incest, super gross that they used their dad for that. But, like, it was desperation and hopelessness. They literally were like, we're going to die. And then our entire lineage, like our family, as. As far as it's come up until this point is going, that's it to cease to exist. So as a result, okay, moving forward now, as a result, both of Lot's daughters became pregnant by their own father. When the older daughter gave birth to a son, she named him Moab. He became the ancestor of the nation known as the Moabites. When the younger daughter gave birth to a son, she named him Ben Ami. He became the ancestor of the nation now known as the Ammonites. Okay. And something to know about the Moabites and the Ammonites is they actually become in tension with Israel. So there's like a bunch of conflict and tension that happens with those nations in the future. And so with that being said, that also points to the fact that human decisions actually make everything messier. And so we will see eventually the effects of these two daughters taking matters into their own hands, right? Making their own human decisions without God and how it actually makes thing ends up making things messier. And we. We actually have already seen that in the Bible, earlier in Genesis, when Abraham's wife Sarah insisted that he have sex with their helper and get her pregnant, because Sarah wasn't getting pregnant, even though God had already promised them that they were going to have kids and that. That Abraham was going to have so many descendants, more than he could count. But even that is, like, that became a really messy situation as well. And so it's. As soon as we start to take things into our own hands is when we see the repercussions and the consequences of how that does not only affect us, but it affects so many people after us. And so that is a little foreshadowing moment of what will come because of how Lot's daughters took matters into their own hands instead of just having trust that the Lord was going to help them stay alive and that they would be able to continue their lineage, that this was only a season. But again, they were filled with hopelessness and desperation. And so, unfortunately, what do we do when we're hopeless and desperate, y'? All, we be making decisions we shouldn't be making. We freak out and we stop thinking about what God wants and we go, okay, but, ah, then we'll do this. And so that's what happened here. So now we're in Genesis 20. Abraham moved south to the Negev and lived for a while between Kadesh and Shur. And then he moved to Gerar. While living there as a foreigner, Abraham introduced his wife Sarah by saying, she is my sister. So King Abimelech, y', all, I don't know of Gerar, sent for Sarah and had her brought to him at his palace. But that night, God came to Abimelech in a dream and told him, you are a dead man, for that woman you have taken is already married. But Abimelech had not slept with her yet. So he said, lord, will you destroy an innocent nation? Didn't Abraham tell me she is my sister? And she herself said, yes, he is my brother. I acted in complete innocence. My hands are clean. And in the dream, God responded, yes, I know you are innocent. That's why I kept you from sinning against me and why I did not let you touch her. Now return the woman to her husband and he will pray for you, for he is a prophet. Rewinding a little bit. This might sound familiar to some of us already. If you. If you've already read Genesis, there was actually another time that Abraham lied to people, saying that Sarah was his sister instead of his wife, because he was afraid that when they were to see how beautiful Sarah was, knowing that they were married, that they would kill him so they could have her. And so that was just Abraham. And again, leaning on. On his own understanding, not having a lot of faith and believing that that was what he needed to do to survive and to live. And so what was interesting to me at this point, and I asked the question, I Was like, why did he do it again? Because he was proven that like everything was fine the first time, that he didn't need to lie and say that she was his sister, that the Lord was going to protect him and provide and that everything was going to be okay. And so I was like, why is homeboy doing it again? And the truth is, is that this is an example of what a fear based pattern is. Like, sometimes, sometimes we do stupid stuff out of fear, right? We make fear based decisions and sometimes we do it again and again and again. And so this is Abraham just doing that. This was a fear based pattern falling into old fear. Because the truth is, growth isn't always linear. Okay? So sometimes. And sweet Abraham, he's doing his best man, you know? And again, the Lord has so much patience for him, as he does for us too. But like, the truth is, is like sometimes we fall into old fear. And that's okay. God has grace for it. Like, obviously God did, right? Even here, God actually encountered Abimelech in his dreams to be like, hey bro, I know my guy over here lied to you and said that that's his sister, but that's his wife. So don't you dare touch her, have sex with her. Because that was like a big, big, big, big no, no, big no, no. To sleep with somebody else's wife. It still is. It still is not okay, but like, like, that was like put to death type stuff, right? That's why Abimelech was like, okay, God, I'm innocent. Like, will you destroy an innocent nation? AKA like, you're not going to destroy us over this? Like, I didn't know. And God's like, yeah, I know you didn't know. So that's why I'm telling you now. So you need to bring her back to her husband. And also he'll pray for you too, because he's a prophet and that'll bless you. And so, yeah, God has grace. That was him extending his grace, even though Abraham did the same fear based pattern as he's already done. And yeah, like, growth isn't always linear, okay? So sometimes we fall back to old fears, and that's okay. So God also signals to the king to do the right thing and show how sacred his covenant with Abraham is. And so that's also what God was doing in his conversation with Amalek Am Abimelech, y'. All. What? Abimelech in his dream. Okay, so then Abimelech got up early the next morning and quickly called all his servants together. When he told them what had happened. His men were terrified. Then Abimelech called for Abraham. What have you done to us? He demanded, what crime have I committed that deserves treatment like this, making me and my kingdom guilty of this great sin? No one should ever do what you have done. Whatever possessed you to do such a thing? Abraham replied, I thought, this is a godless place. They will want my wife and will kill me to get her. And she really is my sister, for we both have the same father, but different mothers. And I married her. When God called me to leave my father's home and to travel from place to place, I told her, do me a favor. Wherever we go, tell the people that I am your brother. Then Abimelech took some of his sheep and goats, cattle, and male and female servants, and he presented them to Abraham. He also returned his wife Sarah to him. Then Abimelech said, look over my land and choose any place where you would like to live. And he said to Sarah, look, I am giving your brother 1,000 pieces of silver in the presence of all these witnesses. This is to compensate you for any wrong I may have done to you. This will settle any claim against me, and your reputation is cleared. Then Abraham prayed to God, and God healed Abimelech, his wife and his female servants so they could have children. For the Lord had caused all the women to be infertile because of what happened with Abraham's wife, Sarah. Okay, and now this is the happy part, right? Because again, up until this point, if you guys don't know, Abraham and Sarah had yet had a child of their own. Yet, even though they were of old age and. And they still were waiting. And so now this is Genesis 21. It says the Lord kept his word and did for Sarah exactly what he had promised. She became pregnant and she gave birth to a son. For Abraham at his old age, this happened at just the time God had said it would. And Abraham named their son Isaac. Well, guys, that was kind of a fun and educational and kind of. It shouldn't have been awkward, but a little bit weird. I mean, the Old Testament, y'. All. There's some crazy stuff that went on. There's some crazy stuff that went on. And sometimes I'm like, lord, you really do be having patience with us. Like, we are whack people, are whack humanity, weirdos. We're a bunch of weirdos. But God loves us and he has so much mercy for us. And I just think that, like, things like that in the Bible too. It's just such an emphasis and continues to point back to the fact that when God says that everything that is done for evil, God actually ends up using for good and his glory. And it's true. Like, every evil act, every evil thing that's ever happened in the history of ever, God will use and has used for good. Like, there's nothing under the sun that he can't use for good, and there isn't something good to be brought out of it. And so I even pray that that's like, the revelation for y' all is, even in the things that feel so unjust and so unfair, just know that there's always an opportunity for God to bring something out of it that's beautiful. He is the one that brings dust and ashes and makes them beautiful. He brings beauty out of ashes. Like, that is our God. And we're not going to continue to put him in a box of anything that says anything less than that, that he's not capable of it, or that things are too far gone, or there's just, like, no way. And the truth is, is, like, that probably is something that crosses a lot of our minds. I know that it's crossed my mind plenty of times of, like, yeah, God, sorry. Like, I actually don't see how anything good can come out of this at all. Like, I actually am angry that you would allow this because how in the world could there be anything good that could come out of this? And the truth of that is, like, we need to step aside and we need to stop again. Like, it's not by sight that we walk. Right. We said this in last week's episode, but it's just as revelant today as it probably will be tomorrow and the next day and every day of our lives is that we don't walk by sight, y'. All. We walk by faith. That is the truth. So we don't look at a circumstance and say, no, there's no way, God, that you can restore this. There's no way that you can make something beautiful out of this. Because that's not where we put our trust. Like, we put our trust in who God says He is, and we put our faith in him and not circumstances, not how things look. You know? So, yeah, I would love to help remind you guys and encourage you that when you feel discouraged, when there's so much evil happening around you, or, like, yeah, I mean, it doesn't have to be evil, but it's just like, this doesn't look good. God, I don't see a way out of this that He Always makes a way. It's insane that Sarah. I think she was literally in her 90s, and obviously Abraham was 100 years old by the time that they got pregnant. Do you understand that there is actually no feasible, possible biological way that they could have a child? That doesn't make sense. Like, just as Mary conceiving a child, Jesus carrying Jesus in her tummy, like, that was impossible. Homegirl had never had sex in her life. She was a virgin. That's the same living God that we talk to every single day. And I think that that is the veil that needs to be torn from our eyes if we've allowed any kind of, like, mask to cover us and, like, our eyes and. And keep us from seeing that truth. Like, this is the same God we're talking about today. And the same God that you pray to every day is the same God that gave Abraham and Sarah a child in their 90s, slash 1/0, like he promised them. And they had to wait a very long time. But God didn't forget. And even when it seemed impossible, like, even when it seemed like it was like, okay, I'm too old now, God. And he still fulfilled his promise to them even after they tried to take matters into their own hands. Can we talk about that part, too? Like, we didn't read that scripture today, but we referred to it for a second, where Sarah and Abraham, like, they literally had another plan of how they were going to conceive, and it was going to be through their helper, another woman. Sarah was like, yeah, this is the only way we're gonna have a kid, because I don't see any other way. It's the fact that God still did it. It's his mercy, y'. All. It's literally his mercy. It doesn't make sense. But he still decided to give them a kid even after they tried to take matters into their own hands. And again, it was at a time that they honestly probably thought it was too late. But it's never too late. God is always on time. That's what the scripture says, y'. All. Can we just read that one part again? He says, he says, he says. He says the Lord kept his word and did for Sarah exactly what he had promised. She became pregnant, and she gave birth to a son. For Abraham in his old age, this happened at just the time God had said it would. His timing is perfect. He is a perfect, on time God. His only option is to be perfect and on time. So maybe to our own eyeballs, Sarah and Abraham's eyeballs, they're Looking at the situation, they're, yeah, I'm too old. But God said, no, it's actually right on time. And it's actually right when I said that it would happen. Guys, we need to have faith. Faith that God is so much bigger than the box that we put him in. And he's bigger than our circumstances. He's bigger than your bank account. He's bigger than the unfortunate things that have happened. He just is bigger than all of it. And so thank you, Jesus, that you are bigger than the problems in our lives, in the ways that we doubt you. God, thank you that you're actually bigger than our doubts. Like, it reminds me of that scripture of like, lord, I believe, but help my unbelief. And it's the fact that he has mercy for us even in our unbelief. Like, it is actually okay. And let me remind you this too. This is worth mentioning. Even if you have lacked faith, even if you have tried to take things into your own hands, even if you've completely lost hope in the fact that God could do it, he actually still has mercy for you in those moments. Like, I don't want you guys to ever think that because you've fallen short in having faith at times, that means God is now going to revoke the blessing. I don't know if you guys ever believe that. Sometimes I've believed that. And that just, like, isn't God's character. And I think I would encourage you guys that if a thought like that crosses your mind, you need to immediately combat that and challenge it with scripture and say, okay, this is a thought that I'm having right now. Is it actually accurate biblically to God's character? Is this actually something that I can find in God's character today? Because I'll believe it if I can find it in the Bible. But if you can't find it in the Bible, then you best believe it's a lie from the pits of hell. Because the thing is, is like, the enemy is always going to try to convince us that our Heavenly Father isn't good and that he doesn't care. And he's not a compassionate dad or a dad that cares. And he's a dad that unjustly and unfairly punishes is. And so the minute that we lose faith, he goes, nope, never mind. I'm not giving you that blessing anymore because you lost faith for too long. That's not him. That's so clearly not him. That's literally not God. Even lot lost faith a little bit because he was so freaked out at the fact that they had to flee and run because his whole entire home was being burnt to a crisp. And he, like, was lacking faith. He thought that if he were to go into the mountains, he was going to die. What is that? Lack in faith of God's protection. You're going to be fine, dude. But like, God, he has mercy for us in the times that we are operating in fear and, like, lack faith sometimes that's okay. Will he always encourage us to operate in faith and faith alone? Yeah, of course. That's the way to live. But, like, when we fall short of that, sometimes it's okay. God has mercy. So he's not going to revoke his blessings and his promises. First off, he can't. If he's already promised it, he can't go back on that because he's not a liar. You know who is the author of lies, though. You know who is the father of lies? Satan. So he stays lying. But God. God could never. So if he's already promised it to you, then you better just expect it. I don't know when he'll do it, but you better expect it. And he does. He doesn't just revoke and take it away when you fall short. Okay, okay, that's it. That's my rant. I love you guys. I'm really proud of you. I think you're awesome. Oh, my gosh. We didn't say this last week, guys. Can we do something really cool today? Can we show somebody how cool Jesus is? Can we walk more like him, talk more like him, be more like Jesus today? I love y'. All. I'm so proud of who you are. It's probably because of that I, like, went on a little tangent last week of just talking about how proud I was of you guys. I still am. Okay. I love y' all so much. I hope you have a beautiful Friday. I hope you have an even more beautiful weekend. And I will see you same time, same place next week. I'll see you next Friday. Bye. The Bleacher Report app is your destination for sports right now. The NBA is heating up. March Madness is here, and MLB is almost back. Every day there's a new headline, a new highlight, a new moment you've got to see for yourself. That's why I stay locked in with the Bleacher Report app. For me, it's about staying connected, connected to my sports. I can follow the teams I care about, get real time. Scores, breaking news and highlights all in one place. Download the Bleacher Report app. Today, so you never miss a moment.
Host: Ally Yost
Episode: you keep looking back at what was killing you
Date: March 27, 2026
This episode dives deep into themes of faith, vulnerability, grace, and moving forward from destructive seasons, grounded in a reading and discussion of Genesis 19–21. Ally uses the biblical story of Lot, Sodom and Gomorrah, and Abraham and Sarah to explore personal growth, God’s mercy, and the human tendency to look back at unhealthy pasts. Expect candid commentary, scriptural analysis, and encouraging reminders of God’s love and timing.
"Your girl's getting buff... Just kidding, guys. You will never see my abs. That is not appropriate. And that's not what the podcast is about. Please. This podcast is about Jesus, not my abs." (09:54)
Timestamp: 16:10-19:25
"Lord, I thank you for your joy. Oh my gosh, it's intoxicating. It's the best thing ever." (16:36)
(22:30-28:11)
Reading & Breakdown: Genesis 19
Key Segments: 28:12–44:15
"The culture of Sodom was so far gone that this actually wasn't about, like, attraction. This was actually more about dominating and humiliating outsiders." (33:41)
"God... does have patience with human fear, okay? ... He said okay to going to the small village to meet Lot where he was at." (40:45)
"Her looking back was revealing a part of her heart of like, oh, but I'm gonna miss it a little bit... that she was still emotionally tied to a season that was dead and evil and no good for her." (45:14)
Genesis 19:30–38
Timestamp: 49:10–54:25
"It was desperation and hopelessness. They literally were like, we're going to die and then our entire lineage, like our family... is going to cease to exist." (52:47)
Genesis 20
Timestamp: 54:30–59:10
"This is an example of what a fear-based pattern is... growth isn't always linear, okay? So sometimes we fall back to old fears, and that's okay. God has grace for it." (55:55)
Genesis 21
Timestamp: 59:11–1:02:36
"The Lord kept his word and did for Sarah exactly what he had promised. She became pregnant and she gave birth to a son for Abraham in his old age... this happened at just the time God had said it would." (1:01:46)
"If you're still emotionally tied to a season that was dead and evil and no good for you... that's a place in our hearts that we need the Lord to heal us in." (46:00)
"We don't walk by sight, y'all. We walk by faith. That is the truth." (1:03:14)
"When we cling to what we’re supposed to move on from, we can get stuck." (46:25)
"His only option is to be perfect and on time... If he's already promised it to you, then you better just expect it." (1:01:51, 1:05:36)
Summary prepared for listeners who want deep encouragement, a little laughter, and practical biblical insights about why it’s vital to stop looking back at what was killing you and instead trust God’s path forward.