← Clotheshorse with Amanda Lee McCarty
Clotheshorse with Amanda Lee McCarty
REWIND: Episode 144: The 12 Days of Slow Gifting (part one), with Maggie Greene
02:18:09
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- [00:18]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Welcome to Clothes wars, the podcast that really did listen to Christmas music while writing the script for this episode. And yeah, I mean, it's November. I don't know why I'm listening to Christmas music, but I thought it would, you know, put me in the mood, put me in the headspace, and I think it helped a little bit. Anyway, I'm just going to tell you all that my favorite Christmas song of all is Rockin around the Christmas Tree as sung by Brenda Lee. I definitely break out into song quite a bit at this time of year, even though I don't know if I love Christmas Christmas music. I don't know. Anyway, would love to hear your thoughts on that, but that's not what this episode is about. And in fact, it's time for me to tell you that I'm your host, Amanda Lee McCarty, and this is episode 144. It is, in case you'd missed the memo, that time of year again, the winter holidays. Also known as the time of year when I put peppermint in everything and sing Rockin around the Christmas Tree at inappropriate times. And whether you celebrate Hanukkah, Christma, Three Kings Day, Kwanzaa, St Lucia Day, the Winter Solstice, or like me, some weird combination of both all and none of these. There's an awful lot of gift giving and shopping crammed into about eight weeks, no matter how you feel about the gifting season. And trust me, I have a lot, so many, so many feelings during this time thanks to a career in retail, a complex family situation, and lots and lots of eco anx. But like I said, no matter what you and I might think, gifting season is happening. And gifting is an easy place for us to begin to educate others about consumption, about what happens when we buy things and what happens when we're done with them and who makes our things. And all of the conversations that we have here on Clotheshorse regularly. This is a great time to introduce them to others, to put them into action and have a serious impact. With so many people doing it, often to a degree, as I mentioned, that creates a major negative impact on the planet and its people. It's an ideal time for us to start conversations about doing things differently and to lead by example for those around us. It's time dun dun dun dun to revisit a clothes horse tradition, the 12 days of slow Gifting. And this year I am joined joined by the one and only Halloween Queen and your fairy God Thrifter, Maggie Greene. I am so excited to have her back as part of this holiday tradition. Today's episode is part one of two, because there's 12 days of slow gifting to discuss, and that's a lot of slow gifting. And today we'll be explaining what slow gifting is. How to have difficult conversations about gift boundaries like no gifts with all the people in your life. Trust me, it gets better with practice, the importance of shopping small and how you can find and support small businesses. And we will have a ton of secondhand gift ideas for the people in your life. Honestly, I think Maggie and I could have made about six episodes that were just about secondhand gifting. So maybe we'll bring some more of that content back in the new year. I love a secondhand gifting challenge. Before all of that, let's listen to some audio essays because as you know, every episode for the rest of the year will feature audio essays from small business owners in our community. Today we have not one, not two, but three essays. We've got Ruby of Spokes and Stitches, Bea of Hecky Design, and Kate of Mystical Glow Candle Company. You know, something that doesn't get called out enough is this small business owners are brave. It requires so much bravery, so much strength to push aside the fear of failure, of losing everything that comes with being a small business owner. I, Amanda, am an incredibly fearful, anxious person. And for years, while I was depressed and unhappy with my career as a buyer, my friends would say, you know, you should start your own business. And while I appreciated their confidence in my ability to run a successful business, the reality was that it was really hard for me to see how I could do that. For one, I didn't have a clear idea of what I wanted to do. Secondly, too many people relied on my income. To be honest, at the end of 2019, I ended my relationship with my mother, which a lot of, you know, if you've been listening to for a long time. But what you might not know is that after that, for the first time in many years, I was no longer paying the phone bills of everyone in my extended family, including my mom's fourth husband. Four of seven. I legit would worry, like if I left my job to start a business and it wasn't successful, who would pay everyone's phone bills? How would they talk to one another? So that leads to the third reason. I was stuck in my corporate life and couldn't leave to start my own business. I was just too afraid. I just wasn't brave enough. And I couldn't stop worrying about all the what ifs, all the Ways it could go wrong. As I've said many times before, Clotheshorse exists because fate and the pandemic and my horrible fast fashion employer forced me to live in that place that I had worried about for years when I lost my job at the beginning of the pandemic. I mean, it's a good thing I was no longer paying everyone's phone bill, right? With no hope for another job on the horizon, I'd kind of lost it all. So why not work on something of my own? Clothes Horse is a small business, but to be honest with all of you, it is also an epically failing business from a financial perspective. I mean, obviously flourishing and just thriving as a business that, you know, educates other people and builds community and, I don't know, just gets to learn a lot of stuff and meet a lot of amazing people. But it doesn't make any money. In effect, it loses money. Right now, the small amount of Patreon support and advertising money that comes in covers most of the expenses of running the show, but not all of it. What makes up that gap? What allows me to continue making Clothes Horse while also eating and having a place to live and getting healthcare and buying cat food is my day job, which I took a little bit more than a year ago. If I weren't working somewhere else, I don't think Clothesh would exist anymore. That's the thing about running a small business, right? It's really, really hard. I am just not in a position to do only Clothes Horse full time, and many people are not in a position to run a small business full time, and many are cobbling together all kinds of other income streams, if you will, to make it work for them. Of course, all of us, myself included, would love to do what we love full time and only that, right? Like, if I did only Clothes Horse, it would give me more time to create more content, to have more conversations with more people, to do more events and outreach in the community. I mean, man, I would be like, setting up a network of people who teach mending and laundry, and I mean, like, I have a million ideas there, and maybe that will happen someday. I mean, that would be incredible. That's. That's my dream. I definitely like a lot of you who are probably listening to this with your own projects and businesses. I definitely get into my head sometimes that it's just all one big failure for me, maybe just happening in slow motion. But I also do believe that change is coming. And I feel that for all of us. For me, as a person who creates content and offers information. I believe that more people are starting to shift their perspective to see that information and knowledge are just as valuable as stuff. And if that happens, then I really might be able to have closed source be my only, my one and only job. And for all of the small business owners out there, I really do believe, I mean, I see this happening in front of my eyes, that more and more people who aren't even a part of our community, who are living other lives, who aren't even aware of the things we talk about in terms of sustainability and ethnic et cetera, but people who are just soured on big business and what it does and does not sell us, they're seeing more and more the value in shopping small and supporting small businesses. And I do think that we are on the threshold of a small business renaissance. I really do believe that. But I'm telling you all of this because our first audio essay from Ruby of Spokes and Stitches is about how her financial situation motivated her to pursue a full time job once again, something I super understand. So her business is on the back burner right now. And I just think so many of us forget that starting and running a small business requires a lot of money because in addition to the money you need to run the business, you need money to run your life. And sometimes it just doesn't happen the way we need it to in order to have some level of financial stability and of course, the ability to rest easy at night. I appreciate stories like this like Ruby's and the honesty and bravery required to share them because business media coverage is so focused on these like unicorn companies that allegedly started from nothing and are now worth like a gazillion doll. These highly fictionalized like business fairy tales where no one is ever worried about paying their medical bills or getting their car fixed. This kind of nonsense just perpetuates the myth that anyone can be successful in business if they, you know, just work hard enough. And nope, we know that's not true. There are so many things stacked in our favor and against us. Okay, well with that introduction, let's jump right into the audio Essays Foreign hi.
- [11:10]
Ruby Gertz
Amanda, My name is Ruby Gertz and I am a sewist and pattern maker and educator. In fall of 2020, I was one of the people who quit my high pressure underpaid job in art school admissions and started a small business. I started Spokes and Stitches as an indie sewing pattern company. At the time, at the height of the pandemic, selling digital products online seemed like a safe and lucrative option in my first year and a half, I released four sewing patterns and taught online crafting, sewing and mending workshops for local libraries and other organizations. During the sewing pattern development phase, I fell deep down a rabbit hole of researching size chart development and grading techniques across a wide size range. And I basically developed my own system for drafting across different proportional fits in a way that would be gender neutral and ideally fit the most bodies across across a wide size range as possible. During this time, I also sought out a business course. I attended webinars from my local sbdc, that's a small business development center. And I established relationships with several mentors and professional service providers to help me navigate the murky depths of entrepreneurship. After 18 months of nearly non stop work and effort towards making my business profitable, I began to recognize the signs of burnout. I knew I had to take a step back and reassess. I decided to declare a two month sabbatical during which I planned my belated Covid wedding and went on a honeymoon trip to Ireland with my spouse. When I returned, I felt energized and excited to reimagine my business as a solarpunk atelier, a one stop shop for beautiful and imaginative custom clothing and costume pieces, sewing lessons and workshops, and mending and alteration services. I was really tired of spending so much time at the computer, especially doing the sewing pattern development, and I really wanted to do work that was more hands on and actually be making things myself. So I revamped my website and branding and I began opening up my home studio for these new services. It was exciting, but I still felt like something was missing. I was really lonely and I was constantly stressed out about money. I have a lot of student loan debt and the federal zero interest deferment on federal student loans was one of the reasons I was able to take the financial risk of starting my own small business in the first place. This was a deferment on all federal student loans that was issued during the pandemic and I believe now has been extended to December of 2022. So as the deadline for the loans to be, you know, essentially turned back on was creeping closer, my financial anxiety was getting pretty unbearable. And then about a month ago, I got the opportunity to go work for a company that makes puppets, props and costumes for the entertainment industry. This was a full time job, you know, in my field that utilized my skills and the timing felt like a divine intervention and I said yes, right now I have decided to put my small business on hiatus while I rebuild my savings and learn new skills working for someone else. I'll still sell my PDF sewing patterns online, but I won't be taking commissions or teaching sewing lessons or workshops for the foreseeable future. There are definitely sacrifices I'm making by choosing to work full time for someone else, and I thought about these a lot when I made this decision. Having to ask for time off, having a shitty commute, using all of my time and creative energy towards someone else's projects and goals. But honestly, trying to run a small business as a solo entrepreneur caused me so much stress and anxiety that I was willing and even excited to pack it all away for a while. My new employer is great and they've made it really clear that they care about their workers quality of life. It's been really delightful working on a team of people and getting to know other creatives and working alongside other people instead of working alone by myself all the time. I still think that I'll circle back to entrepreneurship in the future, but for now I'm really grateful for the opportunity to make consistent pay and not be shouldering the burden of always having to be in charge and make every decision. So that's my small business story. You can find me on Instagram as spokesandstitches all one word lowercase spokes like the spokes of a bicycle wheel and stitches. Thanks again for the opportunity to share my story and thank you for this amazing podcast that I love listening to in the car on my shitty commute to my new job. Thanks.
- [16:08]
Bea Lorimer
Hi Amanda, thank you so much for giving small businesses this opportunity for being such an influential change maker. My name is Bea Lorimer and I have an upcycled clothing brand small business called Hickey Design. I work with pre loved clothing that is typically destined for landfill. I started my business about 12 years ago and I started because I saw how much clothing op shops throw out. They are just inundated with donations and as I'm sure you know, probably at least 40% of what's donated gets tossed out. A lot of it's still in good condition, they just get way too much. Anyway, once I knew this I felt compelled to do something about it. I've always been an avid recycler. I used to have a fashion design business a couple of decades ago, so I was already designing and sewing my own stuff. Actually I've been sewing since I was about 8 years old. Anyway, I just started collecting bags and bags of clothing, cutting it up, seeing what I could do with it. I believe that from a design point of view, when you put limitations around it you're just forced to be more creative. So I like that about upcycling. I'm based on Wai Hickey island, which is a little island close to Auckland and New Zealand. So down here, New Zealand produces quite a bit of wool, especially merino wool, which is a nice washable, non shrinking, lightweight kind of wool. So I focus quite a bit on that. Collect heaps of merino jumpers and shrunken wool sweaters. I turn them into bright colored sweater coats, merino ponchos, and now I'm doing a unisex pullover sweater. I also work with lots of denim, making patchwork jeans, and I do a lot of skirts. There is such an incredible amount of waste in the fashion industry. Whether it's clothing that's thrown out, industry fabric off cuts or leftover fabric samples, there is just no way that anything new needs, needs to be produced. We've got so much surplus, we've really got to be utilizing what we have. People have to get over this consumption mentality and start embracing upcycling. And anyway, why do people want to wear the same as everyone else? At least with upcycled, each piece is going to be unique. So I think find your own style, be colorful, shop mindfully and support upcyclers. Anyway, that's my thoughts. Thank you.
- [19:03]
Kate Russell
Hi there. My name is Kate Russell, and in the summer of 2020, I happened upon my small business. I had never intended to be a business owner. In fact, I went to college for musical theater performance. And In March of 2020, I was solidifying my contract for my first Broadway show. And the day I was supposed to go in and finalize things, Broadway got the notice that they were closing down because of COVID And I went back to my home school state and really shut down. Everything that I had worked for for the past decade of my life had just been kiboshed right in front of me. And I didn't know what to do. I sat on the couch eating Ben and Jerry's and watching RuPaul's Drag Race for many months when my sweet partner asked me if there was anything I had always wanted to do. He wanted to help me get out of this funk. And I racked my brain for a little bit and I realized, you know, I always thought it would be really cool to try and make candles just for fun, just for me. And he was very sweet and he bought me a candle making kit off of this random website. And it came and I was so excited because as a young girl, my mom always had candles lit in the house, for me, that was a sign of peace and safety. I had a bit of a tumultuous childhood, but I always knew that when I came home and the candles were lit that things were good. So not only am I a lover of candles because the way they smell and the way they look, but for me, there's an emotional component there that I learned, I guess, in my childhood from my mom. We would always go shopping at the Yankee Candle store, and the scents were always so comforting to me. And again, it was like a beacon of hope. I knew when I came home the candles were lit, that it was going to be a good night. It was going to be a good day. And so Fast forward to 2020 and my candle kit arrives and I make my first set of candles, and they turn out better than I ever could have hoped. Now, I want to preface this by saying that I am a Capricorn and I'm very type A. So you can bet your bottom dollar that before I even opened this candle kit, I was watching YouTube video after YouTube video on how to correctly make a candle. So I wasn't going into this blind. But it's difficult for me to do anything and just wing it, right? So I made my first batch of candles, and they were stunning. I decorated them on top with crystals and all sorts of beautiful things. And I thought to myself, I want to share these with the world. At the time, I had a small Instagram following, and I thought I should put these on my Instagram and see if anybody else loves them as much as I do. And sure enough, people were like, where can I buy those? And I thought to myself, buy those? Oh my gosh, people want to buy these. People want to pay money for these. And lo and behold, it dawned on me, maybe I could be a Chandler, which is a candle maker. Maybe I could start a small business. Now, when I started my business, I was living in Arizona, and it was the middle of the summer, so the first couple months were a little rough. I was using a Google Doc to take orders from people, and I was totally out of my depth. Like I said, I did not go to school for business, had no idea how to package things, how to print packing slips, what was the best shipping company to use? How do I even pack these candles? And I ended up packing all of my candles with ice packs because it got to be 120 degrees where I was. And I'm making like, I still do soy candles, and they melt really easily in 120 degrees. So I remember kind of just winging it. And it gave me this sense of purpose to know that I was creating things that brought joy to other people. Especially during this time. We're in the middle of a pandemic, and everybody was feeling really down and confused and scared and sort of listless. And here I had birthed into the world these beautiful creations that were making people excited. I sent out my first shipments and started to get some feedback. And people were obsessed. They were just as obsessed as I was. And I thought, okay, well, maybe now I can make a different kind of candle. Like, maybe I can design something different. And thus my company was born. So I sort of stumbled into it. And then the past years, it's been about two years now, it's gone through such a transformation. I've changed the name, I've changed the branding, and I have learned so much. And I think the thing that stands out to me the most about being a small business owner, why I feel like it's important, important for me to continue doing this, is being. Being a small business owner. You get to put the human element back into consumerism. We live in a society where we are constantly bombarded with. By this, by this, I mean, Jeff Bezos is like the richest person in the world. Everybody Amazons everything. But there's this beautiful, unique human element that you don't get when you are purchasing things from places like Amazon or Walmart. When you go to a craft market or a farmer's market or an antique shop, you can feel the energy in the air. It's palpable, it's exciting. These things mean something, and it makes it all the more fun to buy them. Somebody spent time with this. There was a human being that put their love and energy into this. I can't tell you how many times I've had people say to me, you know, I used to buy all my candles from Target, and now I buy them from you or other small business owners. Because there's something about connecting with your community that just cannot be found when you are consuming from big box stores. As a small business owner, that is something that has sort of dawned on me. And I think I knew it before, but I don't think that I could speak to it. You know the difference when you are shopping or you're out at a mall and there's like a little store that's owned by somebody and everything in it is like handmade goods, and you walk in, it's like, this is so exciting. There's something exciting about it because it was made for you, it wasn't made for everybody. It was made for you. When you go into a big box store, it doesn't feel like that these things were made for everybody. They don't care who buys them as long as somebody buys them. But that human element that comes from small businesses just cannot be beat. And that's why I always tell people who want to start their own businesses just do it. Because there is nobody else out there like you. There's a million people selling candles. I am not unique in that respect. I'm unique in that I'm me. And when I make something for you, this is the only place you can get it. And so I love to encourage people to follow their dreams and create what makes them excited. Because whenever I design a new candle or package an order, I'm excited. And I hope and believe and know that that excitement, that love and that joy is then imprinted on that product and sent to the person who needs it. And it's in this way that I feel like we can reassess, establish connection with each other in a very human way. So I guess throughout my journey I've learned that energy is important and people can feel it. It's why your favorite brands are your favorite brands, whether they're giant or tiny, they're your favorite for a reason. It's the energy that comes off of the product you're buying. And it's my belief that it comes from the person who made it, the person whose heart and soul went into creating or curating that for you. So again, my name is Kate. I run Mystical Glow Candle company. I make soy candles that are sustainable and clean burning. Most of all, they have soy spectacular energy. And that is because I will it to be so. Every candle I make, I make with joy and excitement. They are small batch, hand poured. You can find me Mystical Glow Candle Company on Instagram or mysticalglowcandleco.com and to any entrepreneurs who may be listening to this, just do it. You are the thing that makes your business worth it. You are the thing that people are buying. It is your energy, your love, your excitement and your joy. Thank you so much.
- [29:54]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Thank you to Ruby, which by the way, is Dylan's middle name, a name I love. Also, thank you to Baby and Kate for some incredible audio essays. I am really proud to have all of you in our community. Kate touched on something that I want to just call out again. This idea of loving what you do, of being passionate about it. I have to tell you that is the advice I give every small business Owner, I mentor and teach, create and sell products and services that you love. Do it in a way that aligns with your personal values. Make your brand intrinsically you. Because running a small business is stressful. It's exhausting. It can be all consuming. And if you're spending all of that time and energy on something that isn't exactly you, you're going to get burned out very fast. And you know what your customers will notice. Your business is a brand. You are that brand. Your brand should be you. That's something I repeat time and time again. Okay, well, moving along, there's a lot to cover in this episode, so let's just jump right into part one of my conversation with the one and only Maggie Greene. All right, Maggie, you're like a regular around here. I'm still going to go ahead and instruct, introduce you as the queen of Halloween, even though we have moved on to other holiday themes at this point. But do you want to remind everybody else who you are beyond winning Halloween year after year?
- [31:38]
Maggie Greene
Yeah. So thank you for the acknowledgement. I never get tired of being referred to as the Halloween Queen. It's my favorite, one of my, one of my favorite crowns to wear. Listeners, you know, you've heard, you've heard from me before, but you can also call me your fairy God thrifter. That's a role that I play all year year round. But I am the chief everything officer of Maggie Green Style, which is a small micro business that I describe as a one woman band on a mission to transform how you see yourself. And I specialize in personal brand and style.
- [32:15]
Amanda Lee McCarty
So naturally, you as the Halloween Queen are a great fit for an episode about gifts, I think, you know, I, when I started to think about this year's slow gifting episode, I knew right away you had to be the guest. Even though I know you do not love this time of year, nor do I. It's very complicated for me. And so I'd like to hear, you know, what are your thoughts on the November and December of it all?
- [32:47]
Maggie Greene
I mean, I, Halloween is my Christmas. That's, that's kind of, you know, I, I, I invest everything emotional and I.
- [32:57]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Mean, you nailed it this year, by the way. I couldn't have been more thrilled by your costume.
- [33:03]
Maggie Greene
Thank you. So, you know, like, once Halloween is over and it is like an overnight shift, like as soon as November 1st hits, it's like internally, there's this, I mean, you know, I wake up feeling differently. It's like, I don't know, it's like A downhill, downward spiral almost. It gets. You know, it starts getting colder and darker, and the days get shorter. But also just the holiday season and all of the consumption and the stress and the pressure. And of course, like, I've got a complicated relationship with family, so it brings up, you know, things like that. It's. It's not my favorite time of the year. I don't have what one might call the holiday spirit. I'm like, I am spooky spirit all the way. But I'm. I'm really. I'm inspired by the work that you do with clotheshorse and this specific conversation, because this is a way of, like, counteracting all of those things that make this time of year a struggle for some of us. So thank you for this opportunity.
- [34:07]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I mean, I'm so glad to have you here. And I will say that most holidays give me far more angst and despair than they do happiness. I love Halloween. Somehow. Halloween, to me, is the purest holiday. I love the aesthetic of Valentine's Day, but otherwise, everything else about it can be a real emotional spiral for many people. Also, it's so consumery. Don't get me started on how New Year's Eve is always, like, literally the most disappointing night of the year.
- [34:37]
Maggie Greene
Yes.
- [34:39]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Let's see. Don't really do St. Patrick's Day, but I do love a shamrock shake. And Dustin and I do have a tradition of getting a shamrock shake every year. Not really sure if that, you know, is part of the spirit of St. Patrick's Day, but whatever. Easter, you know, I love pastels. It's kind of fun to decorate eggs. I have enjoyed some ham in my life. That's what my family would have is ham. But in general, I come from. I was raised in an atheist family, so even though we celebrated some of these holidays, it wasn't for religious reasons. So I don't have a lot of connection to it. Fourth of July, Labor Day, Memorial Day, all those holidays obviously have great meaning, but, like, you know, it's not like I'm getting going all out for them. And, you know, when we get into these fall holidays, these winter holidays that are so focused on two things. They're focused on family and shopping. And both of these are really painful things to me. You know, I was telling you before we started that I. My entire adult life has been working on the front lines of people buying stuff they don't need at the holidays. Seriously, like, in the beginning was working retail. I have talked many times on Clothes Horse about all of those freaking humping Dogs that we sold at my first retail job. Like, just hundreds and hundreds of these. Like, they were called Humphrey the humping dog. At Christmas, people bought the shit out of them, and you know that they were, like, in the trash a week later. And as a buyer, my job every year was to think of new ways to get people to buy stuff that they saw and would add as a gift or buy as a gift. But it wasn't really, like, meaningful or special. It was just convenient or on sale or all that was left. Right. And it is out of those ashes that the Phoenix of slow gifting rises.
- [36:35]
Maggie Greene
Okay, I love that analogy. That's so vivid and just like. Yeah, very, very much resonates with me, for sure.
- [36:44]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Good, good. So. So let's talk about gifts for a second. Because one thing that, you know, as a person who's worked retail customer service, any of you who have done this also know this feeling. There is something about this time of year that brings out all of the worst aspects of many people's personalities. And I. I assume it's because they're so stressed out. Right? Like, there's something about these holidays that is super stressful. And I mean, I. I think a big part of that is, like, interpersonal relationships and being forced to out with people who maybe aren't great for you at the holidays. Know that feeling. Well, I'm sure you do too, but I also think people are, like, so stressed out about Christmas shopping or just holiday gift shopping as a whole. Like, it seems like people are, like, the closer we get to the. The. The holidays, the more they are, like, on that brink. I'm just losing it.
- [37:48]
Maggie Greene
Yeah. Like, they. They push it. They kind of put it off through the year. Right? And then there's just this mad dash, like, oh, the clock is ticking. We only have, you know, of course, commercials and the radio, and, like, everybody's doing their big countdown to Christmas. Like, how many reminders do we need that there are only so many days left? I think that just, like, compounds that stress.
- [38:13]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, I think so. I think people worry about money. They worry about the time to find gifts. They worry about, is the gift good enough. Right. I mean, there's just. And then they have to go out there and they have to worry about crowds and driving and, you know, just the general chaos of this time of year. And if you have a lot of anxiety about being in crowded spaces, this is literally the worst time to go anywhere. You know, as we get into this, like, shopping season, like, the best thing you could do is go to Places that don't sell things, which would be like, what? I don't know, even a museum could get dodgy. Yeah, just stay home. There you go. There you go. So I don't know, like, for you, I thought we could. Before we start talking about, like, what slow gifting is and give people advice, which is what we're going to be doing today, we're going to be talking all about the 12 days of slow gifting. I wanted to hear, like, what currently this year, like, what is your plan around gifts? Who are you gifting? Do you. Would you have boundaries around it? Are you. No gifts? Like, tell me what you're up to.
- [39:20]
Maggie Greene
So this year is kind of different than past years. I think I'm going to be even more assertive and vocal and a champion for no gifts in my immediate, like, domestic environment. My partner and I, for several years running, we've kind of made this commitment to not, not really do gifts. Our thing is we treat the dogs like they have a Christmas morning.
- [39:46]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I love that.
- [39:48]
Maggie Greene
And I've, I've been thinking about that a lot as well. Like, normally we would get like stuffed animals and we make this joke that like, it snows in our living room because they just destroy everything. And like, obviously it turns immediately to trash and there's so much was there. So if we're gonna do stuffed animals, let's do them second hand. Let's make that commitment. So that's going to be our challenge this year. But yeah, I, I really, I don't want gifts. I. I want to make that known. In this episode, whoever's listening who might be thinking, like, I mean, I love handwritten notes and cards and things like that. Let me know that you're thinking about me, but please don't send me anything. And likewise, like, don't expect something from me. I just, yeah, I really want to move away from that. So that may change in the future. It's just kind of like my vibe in this moment. So I don't really have a plan for gifting last year and I'll probably do this again this year. I made a point to record like personal video messages to all of my clients, for example, which was a lot of work. You know, there may be only a minute long, but like, that list is long. And I'd like to do that for family and friends too, because it is personal, it's meaningful. There's also zero waste associated with it. No stuff. And it's something that they can, you know, watch once or a hundred times or check it out later, you know, years down the line. So, yeah, I'm a. I'm a big no gifter.
- [41:24]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I. Yeah, no, I love that I have definitely. I have a kid. Even though Dylan is an adult now, I still do give them gifts and their partner and Dustin and I might give one another gifts. But we actually. Our usual. Our family tradition is to go on a trip for the Christmas break week period there because we're not like, I don't know, we're not really connected to our families in a big way like that. However, the pride that you take in your Halloween costumes is my approach to decorating my pink Christmas tree. But Strictly has a craft aesthetic challenge. Don't worry, photos will be coming in the coming weeks, I'm sure. But our big gift to ourselves this year is actually Dustin and I are gonna go to Japan after Christmas.
- [42:14]
Maggie Greene
Oh, wow. That's awesome.
- [42:16]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I know. I just was like, you know, we are not doing anything for any of the other holidays. Just like, travel's been really expensive. We have a lot of stuff going on. Like, just, just. It's just been impossible to make things work out. We might go camping the actual weekend of Christmas, but because, you know, I have off work, we have to like seize the day. But I have been just all year, like, I. I am almost embarrassed to tell people how much I work, but I will say on the weekdays, I generally work from 8am until 9 or 10pm every day between my day job and clothes, horse and small biz, big pick and helping other people, et cetera, et cetera. So I just like, really need to get a break in at the end of this year. And I thought, why not go somewhere really far away? So that's what we're doing.
- [43:08]
Maggie Greene
Pretty damn far. Yeah.
- [43:09]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah.
- [43:10]
Maggie Greene
Good for you, though.
- [43:11]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, I'm excited. We haven't been to Japan since like before the pandemic. But it's a really special place to us. And I am also excited to see what it's like to be there when it's really freaking cold. Because I live somewhere that isn't cold. So that's what our big gift, I guess, is this year. And in general, we just try to focus on secondhand gifts. When we do gift gifts, which is like a labor of love for me, it's right up there with decorating my tree is like finding year round, no matter what it's someone's birthday or anything else is finding the most perfect secondhand gift.
- [43:45]
Maggie Greene
So that speaks to me really deeply outside of the holidays, curating gifts for people and Practicing generosity and service is like definitely a lifestyle, you know, year round activity for me. So I'm not anti gift explicitly across the board. It's just like I want to remove it from this time of year and kind of make it, you know, take a more holistic approach, I guess.
- [44:14]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Totally, totally. Okay, so today we're going to talk about slow gifting, which is exactly what you just said. You know, it's buying gifts with intention. It's actually choosing what the recipient of that gift wants, not just what is available or easy. There's a lot of that. Not what's just on sale for Black Friday or you saw as you were about to check out at the store. It's about asking the recipient what they really want and need and having that dialogue. Right. It's opting for secondhand gifts, which I. That's gonna be my favorite part of this episode and probably yours too. But like I would say one of my dream jobs would to be just to be a secondhand gift shopper for people like as a full time job. Imagine if we could start that business, Maggie. I think we would kill it where we were just like personal shoppers for secondhand gifts.
- [45:03]
Maggie Greene
I am so down. Yeah, that's like I'm already creating the brand in my mind. That is.
- [45:09]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yes. They say if you do what you love, you never work a day in your life. And I think, I mean like I, we'll talk about this more. But I really do love giving people gifts. And actually every time I go on a trip for business, I, I feel like this is very like 1950s dad of me. I always bring Dustin a gift back. A special gift that I have thought about on my entire trip or new in advance. I could only procure there. And so I love giving people gifts and I especially love finding the perfect secondhand gift. Wait until you hear about what I did for our anniversary. We'll get there. But secondhand gifts or items from small brands and makers, like really shopping our values, even when we're talking about shopping for gifts for other people and of course shopping locally when possible as part of that. I actually think that. But the mad dash to buy so much shit on sale or just just a lot of it in the first place, has stripped gift giving and the holidays of a big chunk of joy. You know, to talk about thinking about gifts in a different way or even no gifts at all is not anti holiday. And I cannot say that enough. This is not the war on Christmas or whatever people talk about when they talk about the Starbucks cups changing like, this is really leaning into, like, what they call the reason for the season.
- [46:36]
Bea Lorimer
Right.
- [46:39]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Another part of slow gifting is making gifts when you have that, like, time, energy, privilege. Once again, the time and energy are the privilege. But if you can do that, I think that's a really amazing idea. Reusing materials and packaging for your project, skipping that brand new roll of wrapping paper. Don't worry, we're going to talk about wrapping paper in a few. And also revisiting your gift list. Like, does everyone need a gift? Do you need a gift from them? And, you know, as a larger question, isn't the pressure to give a ton of gifts just a product of consumerism? Maggie, have you been forced into gift situations outside of your control?
- [47:25]
Maggie Greene
Yeah, like, I. So when I think about that, it's not so much like family situations, although I experienced that. But it's like, you know, the. The weird cowork, co working, like, office gift exchange thing.
- [47:43]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Oh, man. Yeah.
- [47:44]
Maggie Greene
Super impersonal. Like, just really. Yeah. Cheap. And it doesn't have any meaning. It sucks. You know, it's like, okay, we're not getting paid well anyway, as employees. And even though, like, they're saying, you know, don't spend more than 10 or 20 bucks, like, so you're also expecting us to pay, you know, like, make this investment back into the company for Christmas. It's just weird. I don't like it.
- [48:09]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, no. I've had to do it at so many jobs and it's so stressful. And I was. I was thinking about it the other day, like, like, what is it about that? Why is it so common? Is it because adults really like to open presents? Or is it that we're being told that it's more fun than it actually is? I don't know. That's a question for the universe, right? But I've had to do so many of those work gift exchanges. And it's always so strange to me that we do it. It's just like one more thing to be stressed out about too, right? Like, oh, God, I gotta go get this $20 gift. And I was teaching a class the other night, and, you know, it was not about the holiday shopping at all, but we started talking about Bath and Body Works. And I said to everyone, how many of you in your life have received small bottles of lotion, shower gel, or hand sanitizer from Bath and Body Works from someone who didn't really know you? And everybody raised their hand and I was like, what if this is what keeps Bath and Body Works afloat? Are Gifts you give to people you don't really know very well? I don't know.
- [49:20]
Maggie Greene
Oh, my gosh.
- [49:22]
Ruby Gertz
Right.
- [49:23]
Maggie Greene
How many bottles of, how many small, like gift size bottles of lotion and products like that did I see on like desks and inside cubicles? And it's just like, yeah, they're. They're cornerstones, kind of. That's funny.
- [49:39]
Amanda Lee McCarty
It is funny. And you know, I will tell you as someone who's like, I know it's creepy to give someone lotion and shower gel if you really think about it.
- [49:47]
Maggie Greene
Yeah.
- [49:47]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Okay. Unless you know them well, you know, then fine. But I was thinking the other day about this like a little bit more because I was just getting in my head, like, do I have to do this with my team at work? The good news is I brought it up and everybody was like, no, that's stupid. And I was like, fuck, yeah. Thank you, everyone. But I was thinking about how, you know, in many of my jobs, you know, we obviously part of our business was E commerce and we got really into this habit of creating landing pages on the website that were like, gifts under $10, gifts under $20, gifts under $50. And that wasn't because we were thinking about people's budgets. It was directly focused on people who are buying for these gift exchanges with a price threshold. They always have a price threshold, which I understand. But I can assure you that all of the retailers are out there, are onto your tricks, onto your gift exchange tricks, and they are pandering to it. So. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So revisiting your gift list. And then lastly, and this is so important is respecting other people's boundaries about gifts. If someone says no gifts, listen to them. They are not just saying that they really mean it. They really, really, really mean it. This is one where I, I don't know if you've had awkward conversations with people who said, like, listen, I don't want gifts, but I. The first time I had a conversation with a family member about this, she was basically like, you're a horrible person. That was the response. And I was like, I don't think it is like, listen, I'm spending so much money to buy a gift for you and your partner from me and then also from my husband. And it's just like, we could all take that money and go do something cool. I would rather you two go out to dinner or go to Disney World or whatever it is that you want to do, because I don't need. If I need something, I'll go buy it, you know? Yeah. And so that was a tough conversation. But I've had other people sort of take it as more like a challenge.
- [51:54]
Maggie Greene
Like, yeah, I was thinking that same thing. Like, I. I will keep this anonymous to respect people's privacy. There is a person that, like, I have the same conversation with them every year, and it's usually like, there's a middle person involved. Like, it's not a conversation that happens directly between us. There's like a mediator that's like, so and so says this or wants to know this, and I'm like, no, I don't. I don't want anything. I'm really serious about that. Please make it clear. And that's. It's. I don't know. It's like, weird and nuanced with them. I think they insist and are so persistent about gifting because they want, like, the acknowledgment and that. Like, I don't know. It's. It's interesting. But, yeah, so I'm gearing up to have that conversation again, like I do every year. Like, no, I don't want anything. Please don't do that.
- [52:50]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yes.
- [52:51]
Maggie Greene
So awkward.
- [52:51]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Don't do it. Respect that. We're going to talk about that more, and we're going to give you some ideas for how to talk to people about that. Overall, this new approach of gifting, slow gifting, is, believe it or not, it's way more fun because it's already super fun to give someone a gift. Like, if you love giving gifts, which I love giving gifts, it's like 1000 times better if it's the perfect gift that you planned in advance, not something you just grabbed along the way. Something that you selected with care and you really, like, thought about. It's just so great. It's also less wasteful because. Oh, man. And I know you see this, too, Maggie, so many times. I'm in the home goods section of a thrift store, and there are always so many new inbox items that were totally sitting in someone's closet for garage, perhaps basement, whatever, for five, 10, 20, 30 years that were gifts that they did not want. And I see a lot of them the same things over and over again, like, oh, my God, so many bread machines, you know, or like, pasta makers. Oh, my God. Yeah, exactly. I was gonna say appliances that only serve one purpose. So many of those. Please don't buy those, everyone. I mean, I get, okay, like, maybe a toaster only serves one purpose, but it kind of does other things, right? But, like, we're talking, like, this is a weird Thing that makes cupcakes. Nope, that thing's called your oven. Okay. We used to sell a lot of those at my first retail job. Lots of these weird cupcake and donut makers that. It was like, no, that's what your oven is.
- [54:33]
Maggie Greene
Unless they ask for it. In that case, you're filling a need. But like, like, yeah, otherwise picks up counter space. They're not going to use it.
- [54:41]
Amanda Lee McCarty
World's biggest wine glass that, like, holds a gallon of wine. No one wants that. No one wants it. They laugh at it for a second. And then guess what? It ends up at the Goodwill. Probably broken. Yep. And that's the thing. There are so many unloved gifts that end up in thrift stores and landfills because they were merely selected to fulfill an obligation. And we all know that feeling. We've all had that even if it was just for our gift, our office gift exchange, it was like, oh, it's gotta be $20. I guess I'm gonna get a bunch of this raspberry lotion. You know, raspberry lotion is a very specific thing. You know, it might not appeal to everybody. I also would just say, like, listen, let's get down to brass tacks here. Like, gifts cost money. People go into wild amounts of debt at the holidays for gifts. I don't even like. Like, thinking about it makes me queasy. I was gonna get some statistics on it and I was like, I can't handle it today. But I know that it does. My friend, my best friend growing up, Laura Curley, her mom, I don't think this exists anymore because we live in a major credit card era now. But she had this thing called the Christmas club, which. It was like a special savings account that every week for the whole year she put money into. And then she. To take it out in December to buy Christmas gifts. To think about saving all year for this one small period of gifts. It just makes me so sad. Did you ever know anyone with a Christmas club?
- [56:07]
Maggie Greene
No. What I thought you were going to say is layaway, because you were talking.
- [56:10]
Amanda Lee McCarty
About, oh, my God. Okay, well, layaway. Now that's how my family got our Christmas shopping done.
- [56:14]
Maggie Greene
That's right.
- [56:15]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Layaway at Hills every year. Yeah.
- [56:19]
Maggie Greene
No interest or whatever for the first month. And like, you're financing gifts. That's.
- [56:25]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah.
- [56:26]
Maggie Greene
You're going literally going into debt.
- [56:28]
Amanda Lee McCarty
My grandma had a layaway everywhere. And so since I was her favorite and her number one errand running partner, there was a several week period, like in December where all I would do is go around town with her, picking up her layaways. And we would. The day that we would wrap all of the gifts, it would be, like, 10 hours of just wrapping, fueled by Pepperidge Farm coconut cake. Like, just, like, sugar high wrapping all of her gifts that she had put on layaway everywhere. And my grandma loves Christmas, so I get it, but my grandma would be a great candidate for slow gifting.
- [57:07]
Maggie Greene
Yeah, I can definitely picture that. Like, wrapping paper and tape and bows.
- [57:12]
Amanda Lee McCarty
And it all adds up, Right? And the thing is, like, we all work so hard for our money, and living in 2022 in this world is very challenging as it is. Like, I don't want us to be spending our money on things that people aren't gonna love, that are gonna sit in a closet, that are gonna go to a landfill. Like, we deserve better than that. The people in our lives deserve better than that. The planet deserves better than that. And honestly, our bank accounts deserve better than that. Right. I also just am gonna add, like, we've already talked about this, and we'll probably talk about it 20,000 more times. No gifts is fun, okay? Like, trust me, it's great to. For everybody to just save their money for something special to get themselves what they want or need to go on a trip. Like, you know, I'm gonna go to Japan. Do the same thing for the other people in your life. I will tell you, I've had conversations with people where I'm like, I don't want to do gifts. And they are horrified. They think that I need more therapy, that perhaps my childhood has turned me into a rotten scrooge of a human, or that I don't trust them to pick out a good gift for me. But really what I'm genuinely saying is, like, I have all the things. Don't worry. Like, get all the things for yourself, you know?
- [58:29]
Maggie Greene
Yeah.
- [58:30]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Let's bake cookies or sing songs or make decorations or do all these other things together. That's gonna be way more fun than the, like, five seconds of unwrapping a package.
- [58:41]
Maggie Greene
Yeah, exactly. Right? Let's spend some time together, you know, Like.
- [58:44]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah. Yeah, that's true. I mean, like, even when I think about growing up, obviously, I'm sure you felt the same way. Like, Christmas Eve was like, will I sleep tonight? Did your family open gifts on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day?
- [58:57]
Maggie Greene
Usually Christmas Day, but we often would open one on Christmas Eve. We could have.
- [59:03]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Totally. Me too. Me too. Okay. All right. And you'd go to bed that night, and you'd be like, oh. Oh, how gotta go to sleep. Gotta go to sleep, gotta go to sleep. But like my brother and I would be up, it would still be dark outside, right? We'd open hot gifts. I was always like really slow about it because I wanted to like savor that feeling. I'm totally that person who would only let myself scratch, scratch and sniff stickers just a tiny bit every time so they would last as long as possible. Totally that person. But my brother would blaze through them. Then we'd be done with the gift and then it would be like, oh, now what? And the most fun Christmases that we ever had. Actually, we all went to the movies and it's like I remember the movies we went to see more than I do the gifts and just the experience of going to the movies with like all my cousins or something. It felt like so fun, you know? So no gifts does not mean no fun or no happiness or no love or no good times. I promise. Let's take a moment to thank some of the incredible small businesses who keep clothes horse going via their generous Patreon support. Selena Sanders A social impact brand that specializes in upcycle clothing using only reclaimed, vintage or thrifted materials from tea towels, linens, blankets and quilts. Sustainably crafted in Los Angeles east, each piece is designed to last in one's closet for generations to come. Maximum style, minimal carbon footprint. Shift Clothing out of beautiful Astoria, Oregon with a focus on natural fibers, simple hard working designs and putting fat people first. Discover more@shiftwheeler.com late to the party creating one of a kind statement clothing from vintage salvaged and thrifted textiles. They hope to tap into the dreamy memories we all floral curtains, a childhood dress, the wallpaper in your best friend's rec room. All while creating modern sustainable garments that you'll love wearing and have for years to come. Late to the Party is passionate about celebrating and preserving textiles, the memories they hold and the stories they have yet to tell. Check them out on Instagram eighttothepartypeople Vino Vintage Based just outside of la, we love the hunt of shopping secondhand because you never know what you might find. Catch us at flea markets around Southern California by following us on Instagram Inno Vintage so you don't miss our next event. Dylan Paige is an online clothing and lifestyle brand based out of St. Louis, Missouri. Our products are chosen with intention for the conscious community. Everything we carry is animal friendly, ethically made, sustainably sourced and cruelty free. Dylan Paige is for those who never stop questioning where something comes from. We know that personal experience dictates what's sustainable for you and we are here to help guide and support you to make choices that fit your needs. Check us out@dylanpage.com and find us on Instagram ylanpage life and style Salt Hats Purveyors of truly sustainable hats, hand blocked, sewn and embellished in Detroit, Michigan. Find us on Instagram althats Gentle Vibes Vintage we are purveyors of polyester and psychedelic relics. We encourage experimentation and play not only in your wardrobe, but in your home too. We have thousands of killer vintage pieces ready for their next adventure. See them all on Instagram at Gentle Vibes Vintage Thumbprint is Detroit's only fair trade marketplace. Located in the historic Eastern market. Our small business specializes in products handmade by empowered women in South Africa making a living wage creating things they love like hand painted candles and ceramics. We also carry a curated assortment of sustainable and natural locally made coffee goods. Thumbprint is a great gift destination for both the special people in your life and for yourself. Browse our online store@thumbprintdetroit.com and find us on Instagram thumpprintdetroit Vagavan Vintage DTLV is a vintage clothing, accessories and decor reselling business based in downtown Las Vegas, Nevada. Not only do we sell in Las Vegas, but we're also located throughout resale markets in San Francisco as well as at a curated boutique called Luxe and Ivy located in Indianapolis, Indiana. Jessica, the founder and owner of Vagabond Vintage DTLV recently opened the first IRL location located in the Arts District of downtown Las Vegas on August 5th. The shop has a strong emphasis on 60s and 70s garments, single stitch tees and dreamy loungewear. Follow them on Instagram vagabondvintagedtlv and keep an eye out for their website coming fall of 2022. So explaining what slow gifting is was sort of like the first day of slow gifting. And now we're going to move on to day two, which is start early. Slow gifting takes time, hence the term slow. So it's important that you start early. Maggie, did you ever have anyone in your family who started in like June or July?
- [64:34]
Maggie Greene
Oh, or even earlier than that. Like springtime? Yeah. They see something, they, they grab it and then they like hide it and stock it away until. Until December. Yeah.
- [64:46]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Which I like love. That's me all year thrifting. Like I have been accumulating my secondhand gifts all year. It's hard for me to like keep it a secret. That's like the hardest part for me, I'm getting better at it, but I will be like, I, I can't take it anymore. I'm just going to give it to them now. You know, I'm definitely that person. But there is something, like, incredible about, like, December rolling around. And all you're doing is, like, thinking about new ways to package all the sick gifts you already had and, like, thrifted. One excuse that I hear a lot for shopping secondhand, which I know you know very well, is that you can't just go to the store and get exactly what you want on the first try. Okay, it does happen sometimes times, to be fair, but most of the time it takes time. Right? I. I don't know about you, Maggie, but, like, Dustin and I definitely have a lot of, like, weird superstitions about thrifting that I swear everyone does. Like, Dustin feels that if you walk right into the thrift store and grab a cart, then you're not gonna find anything. So what you have to do is walk around until your hands are full, then get the cart and you will have a good thrifting. So he gets kind of, like, angry at me if I grab a cart because, like, I've basically ruined it. Like, we're not gonna find anything. Or other friends of mine are like, I can't go with one specific thing in mind because it won't be there. But if I don't think of it when I walk in, it will be there. I don't know if you've experienced similar superstitions.
- [66:15]
Maggie Greene
Yeah, I think, I definitely think if you walk in with urgency and there's like this very explicit need that you have to fill, that's time bound. You're like, I need this thing for something this week. Yeah, probably not going to happen. At the same time, I think it's imperative that you make a wish list before you walk through the door. Right. Also be open to, like, I mean, be, be strategic. Make sure that anything you can possibly think of is on that list. Don't forget anything, but also be open to, like, what? Whatever. You're not going to find everything on the list. You may only find one thing, but make sure you're prepared. Just don't go in with, like, expectations.
- [67:00]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I think that's a great, great way to put it. Basically, secondhand gifting is the best thing ever, but, like, you need to be working on it all year. Now, if you are listening to this episode now and it's November, this does not mean that the ship has sailed on finding secondhand Gifts for people. But you're just going to need to change up your strategy. Like, you might need to buy more online or go to multiple.
- [67:25]
Maggie Greene
Yeah, go to multiple spots. Exactly.
- [67:27]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah. Like, take a whole weekend where you focus on it. It's kind of actually really fun, and it gives you that shopping montage from an 80s teen movie feeling without actually having to go to the mall.
- [67:37]
Maggie Greene
Thank goodness.
- [67:39]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Thank goodness, right? So that's like secondhand shopping, obviously takes some time. Also, if you're gonna order from makers or artisans, Etsy sellers, order early. And I mean, like right now to ensure online delivery. And you're gonna save yourself and almost kind of more importantly, the maker, a ton of stress. Because every year, the usps, this is like their busiest time of year. The volume expands, like, exponentially because we've got gifts, we've got online shopping, we've got holiday cards, and I don't know, probably there's hams right now on a mail truck somewhere, someone's shipping a ham or those pears, gift baskets, all this stuff. It's all coming USPS, UPS, FedEx. And so, like, things slow down and things can get lost. That's why it's really important to start now. Place those orders, like, as soon as you're done listening to this episode. If you were thinking about buying something from someone on Etsy or Instagram, go do it right now, now. And honestly, you're gonna spend December feeling very, very relaxed instead of every day messaging them to be like, did it ship yet? Do you have tracking? Seriously? I think a lot of people learned that lesson the very hard way over the past few years. I recently received a package. It is November of 2022. I received a package that I was supposed to receive In January of 2021, just a few weeks ago. What? It was the craziest thing. My phone rang and it was fed. It said, FedEx Lancaster. And I was like, well, that's weird. That's where I used to live. I'm like, that's strange. Maybe they're gonna offer me a job. And I answered. And they were like, oh, you're not gonna believe this, but we have this package that is addressed to you that was sent usps, but somewhere along the line, it just ended up at our FedEx facility. And I was like, whoa. They were like, do you want it? And I was like, I guess, but I don't know what it is because it was so long ago. And they sent it to me here in Texas. There you go. So order now, for sure. Also, makers need Time to order and receive supplies to make your gifts. So it can help them feel slightly less stressed if you order from them now. And another reason you want to get your slow gifting started right now is that that if you're going to be changing up your gift traditions, you need to have those conversations immediately. So some of these conversations are weird. Some of them might take a couple passes to get them right. If you're going to have, whether that's like a no gift holiday or you want to defined boundaries around gifts, like nothing over $20, only secondhand, no Amazon, any of your other values, you've got to have that conversation now. Like right now. And my advice there is to keep it short and simple. Like, I'm not exchanging gifts this year because I want to live a more sustainable lifestyle or any other reason you want to use. And honestly, the one question I receive the most when we talk about gifting. Well, there are two. Okay, the first one is people saying, I don't know how to have conversations with my family about Amazon. Have you heard this from anyone before, Maggie? Have you faced this dilemma?
- [70:57]
Maggie Greene
Not in my family, but I have had. Yeah, I've heard people talking about their concern, like having that conversation with, with family members and loved ones.
- [71:07]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, yeah. So, I mean, I, I get it. I have found that, of course everybody who knows me is like, probably annoyed with what a social justice warrior I am or whatever they call me behind my back. But when it comes to Amazon, to me, that's actually like the easiest conversation to have. Cause I'll just say, like, hey, I read this series of articles in the New York Times about how Amazon treats its warehouse workers and its delivery people, and it just made me not want to support them anymore. So I'm not going to be buying gifts from Amazon, and I would love if you didn't either. That's all you have to say. Maybe they want to know what articles you read or hear about what you read about. And that's a great thing to say it too. But I think I respect that some people shop from Amazon because it's like the best option that they have. Right. I totally get that. And I'm not gonna shame anyone for that. And it's really important to me when I have conversations like this that it doesn't come from a place of judgment. It comes from my heart, you know, and what matters to me. And so I think just being very straightforward about how it makes you feel is enough. You know, here's the other question that I get the most from people I'm worried if I tell people that I don't want to exchange gifts, they will think that it's because I can't afford it. And the truth is I can't afford it. And that's a feeling that I understand for sure. And I think that we're all afraid to say that we are trying to save money or don't have the money. Guess what? Just say it. Just say it. Honestly, nothing settles a matter more than just being really straightforward about your needs, right? Which is like, I can't afford to do gifts this year. And most people are gonna be like, oh, okay, that's cool. I get it. You know, most likely they're feeling the same way. So that sounds like a harder conversation than it's gonna really be. It's like once you do it, you feel so, so much more relieved. And once again, if someone pushes back at you and says that saying no to gifts is anti holiday or putting rules around gifts is anti holiday, I would say no. It's really about taking the focus away from shopping and stuff and taking it back to the truly important part of the holidays, which is, you know, building memories and spending quality time with the people you love the most or spoiling the pets in your lives, which I really. Maggie, I'm afraid my cats are going to hear that you make the holidays about your pets, and I'm going to have to, like, do something about it.
- [73:36]
Maggie Greene
Uh oh, you're welcome.
- [73:39]
Amanda Lee McCarty
No, I already get to spend about four weeks yelling at them like 70 times a day about the tree.
- [73:46]
Maggie Greene
Oh, gosh.
- [73:49]
Amanda Lee McCarty
We put a hook in the ceiling. The tree is attached to the ceiling.
- [73:53]
Maggie Greene
Oh, that's so smart. If you have cats. That is. That's really smart.
- [73:56]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Easy. It's like a plant hook. It's. It's fine, guys. It's a plant hook and ratchet straps.
- [74:02]
Maggie Greene
That's what Dustin uses because, damn, that's hardcore.
- [74:05]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Hutch is a really big boy. Like, he needs the treat, needs to be. Be solid. But, you know, no matter what, your feelings about gifts and the ethics of the gifts you receive and give are important boundaries. And there's no shame in communicating them to others. The whole idea of early shopping or starting your Chris, your holiday shopping early can get a little dodgy because what can happen is it can lead to over shopping. And then you're my grandma going around town getting all your layaways that you've been working on since July. You do not want to do that. And I will tell you, retailers have been trying for years to get Customers to start shopping for holidays earlier and earlier. Case in point, when did you start seeing Christmas decorations out for sale, Maggie? I. I want to say it was before Halloween this year for sure. Right? Yeah.
- [75:00]
Maggie Greene
I try to avoid retail environments, but I know, like, as far as media, like, like, I mean, yeah, as soon as Halloween is over, it's literally November 1st. Like, you start with the music and the ads and the sales music.
- [75:13]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yes. Yeah. No, it's true. It's true. I was at the grocery store the other day and Christmas music was playing and I was like, what? Because it's also like, you know, been in the, like, low 80s here. And I was like, really? Like, wait, huh? I'm wearing sandals. What's going on? I'm so confused.
- [75:28]
Maggie Greene
Disorienting.
- [75:29]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, it's very disorienting because I definitely do not have. There's no chill in the air for me right now. But, yeah, like, I will tell you, like, I see the posts. Oh, my gosh. Like, there's one subreddit that I follow, but it gives me a lot of anxiety where people snark about crafting. It gets really dark sometimes. But people were, like, freaking out about going to Joanne and Michael's and seeing Christmas stuff out there in, like, August or September. And I was like, here's the deal. I mean, I didn't say this, but, like, it's a. It's something I know far too well. They wouldn't be putting it out then if people weren't buying it. That's the thing. Maybe you're not buying it, but someone is. And that is why they are putting Christmas stuff out in the summertime. Because someone's like, oh, my God, I gotta get it now, you know, which is so foolish at Joann or Michaels because you know there's going to be a coupon coming. But definitely this is why this stuff starts appearing earlier and earlier. And the reason that retailers want you. You to start shopping early is not because they want you to have a relaxing December or that they want you to get the pick of the litter for the gifts for the people in your life. It is because their hope is that you just keep shopping for the rest of the year. That you're like, oh, my God, I'm just gonna keep buying more and more gifts and then stuff for myself. And there's been this sort of, like, holiday creep for a long time with Black Friday and associated deals. Like, I. I have never waited in line for a Black Friday sale. Have you. Do you. Do you know people who do only.
- [77:05]
Maggie Greene
When I was a journalist, I worked for the local newspaper and I was put on assignment to capture the intensity of the moment, like at this, like, retail strip mall. But no, I've never gone as a consumer and waited in line. Hell, no. No.
- [77:23]
Amanda Lee McCarty
There's part of me that, like, wants to do it just to, like, talk to people, but I also just like sleeping. So it's like a trade off. I'm gonna sleep instead. But you know, Black Friday used to really be this thing that literally only happened on the Friday after Thanksgiving. And then we slowly started to be like, okay, the whole week of Thanksgiving, we're gonna have deals, special deals. And then it was like, okay, just for the two weeks around Thanksgiving, we're gonna have deals. And then it was like. I want to say that Amazon was in October this year. Like, it's like, it's a whole season of deals, you know, and it's designed to just get you to keep shopping and, like, not think about it, but to get caught up in the rush of deals all the time. I actually did some research last year that found that people who start shopping earlier, as in, like, well before Thanksgiving, will spend 23% more than people who wait until after Thanksgiving. This is the reason why we see the product arriving earlier in the stores and the sales starting earlier, because you will buy more than you need.
- [78:32]
Maggie Greene
Retail knows that, don't they?
- [78:34]
Amanda Lee McCarty
They know that. They know it. Yeah. Yeah. We're gonna talk more about Black Friday in a few and all these other deals because, like, the deals are coming. I feel like the moment like the clock passed 11:59pm on Halloween, suddenly my inbox was just flooded with like, all the deals already. And it's been like, non stop. Like, retailers I didn't even know I subscribed to, were suddenly like, sending me deals. And like, listen, there's nothing wrong with like, you know, finding a good price on something that you wanted or needed, but it's important to stay organized so you're not getting, like, caught up in all of the excitement, the rush of the deals.
- [79:15]
Maggie Greene
Gift yourself the gift of unsubscribing, too. Like, there's, there's serious nothing wrong with that.
- [79:20]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Unsubscribe, unfollow, do all the things. Protect yourself, you know. All right, so the third day of slow gifting is shopping small. And there are many very good data points to encourage you to shop small. You know, small businesses have a major impact on their communities. According to the U.S. small Business Administration, when you, you spend $100 at a small business $48 stays in the community. If you took that same $100 to a big box store like to Target or Best Buy or what, Even Amazon, only $14 stays in the community. And that's bad. You know, like, we want this money to be circulating in our community so we can create these robust economies. Also, this was really interesting to me as someone who's been laid off by several large companies in my career. Small businesses create jobs in a way that big businesses do not. Since 1995, more than half of the jobs in the United States were created by small businesses. I thought that was amazing.
- [80:24]
Maggie Greene
It's a huge impact.
- [80:25]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, it's a huge impact. Small businesses redistribute wealth. I mean, I. I cannot emphasize that enough. We already know they're hiring people, they're keeping money in their community. But right now, I mean, we know this, a few huge companies rake in most of the money. Amazon, Walmart, Zara, etc. And they make billionaires of their founders and CEOs and pay lots, lots of other money to their shareholders. Imagine breaking up that wealth into hundreds of thousands of small businesses instead. Because I think we all can agree that we don't need billionaires. I'm not really sure what billionaires do for the world other than life, like make elections dodgy. And by Twitter and do things with Twitter. We don't need them. What we need is a lot of people living good, healthy, happy, productive lives. And that really, really breaking up big business is a major part of that. I cannot emphasize enough that it's too late for the biggest companies out there to magically transform into sustainable, ethical brands because exploitation and waste are built into their business model. Like, Amazon is a prime example. And I'm not like, oh my God, did you hear that pun? Amazon is a prime example.
- [81:38]
Maggie Greene
Oh, that was good.
- [81:40]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Dang. Brought to you by Amazon. No, Amazon is a great example. Even though I'm not picking on them. It's just like, really transparent. Because I think in the past couple years, I. I like to think we've learned more and more about how dysfunctional that company is and how bad they are to their employees. Like, in all regards, whether they're like corporate employees, people working in the warehouses, the delivery people who are, like, peeing in bottles because they can't take bathroom breaks. We now know in a pretty major way that Amazon is not good to the people who work there. And I also just would say that, like, a lot of the stuff you buy from Amazon is, for lack of a better adjective, often really Janky, right? It's, like, disappointing, or it's like a knockoff or whatever. I think by now we're starting to realize that, like, we. For Amazon to function and be this massive company, it has to kind of like, dispose of its ethics, right? And that's just baked into the entire business model of Amazon. It's always going to prioritize profits over people. Getting to them to change their ways would mean literally dismantling the entire company and rebuilding it, and that's just not going to happen. But small businesses can constantly make changes to be more sustainable, to be more ethical, to be an important part of their communities. Because they are small, they have that freedom to pivot. The analogy that I always like to use is that, like, turning around a bike is really easy. That's what a small business is. But turning around a cruise ship, that's big business. From what I've heard, it can take take a day or several days to turn a cruise ship around. In the case of big business, we're talking, like, decades. You know, I just think it's so important that we shop small whenever we can. Even though sometimes, like, I'm willing to admit it is not as convenient as getting on an app on your phone and having vitamins and cat food and ring lights and whatever else you order showing up later that day. Like, I get that. But I also think that we need to accept that perhaps convenience is not a human right.
- [83:49]
Maggie Greene
Definitely a privilege.
- [83:51]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Definitely a privilege. Right. But I do think that our sense of, like, convenience or what is inconvenient has been really skewed in the past couple decades. Like, I was thinking about, I mean, you know this. When you were a kid and you wanted to get a book at the library, you'd have to go to the card catalog and, like, pull out the drawer and, like, look it up and be like, like, okay, it's on shelf 7A. Now I gotta go find that. Right. But, like, now you don't have to do things like that. But is that inconvenient to go on that search? Not necessarily, no.
- [84:21]
Maggie Greene
I think our standards have changed.
- [84:25]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, Yeah. I remember when I was a teenager, the thing that kept being thrown out there is that, like, thanks to mtv, all the young people had no attention span. And I am like, you just wait, because right now we're still watching the same video for five minutes. Wait until, like, videos are 30 seconds long on TikTok. Just wait. Okay, so let's talk about where and how to find small businesses, because I think this is, like a Sticking point for a lot of people. They're like, I don't know how to shop small. It does take a little bit more effort, I guess I would say it's a little. It's about as inconvenient as using a card catalog. You know, first off is like, check out your friends and family because there are definitely small businesses within your circle. Like Maggie, how many friends do you think that you have that own a small business?
- [85:19]
Maggie Greene
12, 15, 20?
- [85:21]
Amanda Lee McCarty
A lot. Right. So start with them, right? Because then you're like actually seeing the money make an impact right in front of your eyes. I personally love a gift pop up. A craft fair, flea market. This is the time of year for that.
- [85:35]
Maggie Greene
Bazaars.
- [85:36]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I also love the word bizarre. Yeah, it sounds like so much more elegant, right? Oh, I'm going to the bazaar. You can also find small businesses online and it's not that hard. Instagram, Etsy, Depop, Witchy, all these other online platforms where you are buying something from a person that is shopping small. Google Maps is a great place. Like I think think if you're specifically looking for gift cards, gift certificates to restaurants, cafes, salons, other services, Google Maps is your friend. And I would also just say like ask your friends for suggestions too. I think we all follow a lot of small businesses on social media, but sometimes thanks to the algorithm and I guess our low attention spans, we might forget if you're. Yeah, it really, really is. Has a free weekly newspaper. They are always filled with gift guides and local business suggestions. At this time of year. It's like a tradition, you know. Can you think of any other place things I missed ways to find small businesses?
- [86:38]
Maggie Greene
Not, not really. I was just thinking like local, right. Like the closer to home you can get, I mean you. There might be one right outside your door, right? Like within blocks of where you live. Yeah, look, look around you. And even when you're doing searches online, you know, whoever the gift recipient is, like narrow it down to their community and see what.
- [87:02]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, definitely. Especially if you're gonna like get them like I think it's always nice to get on Google Maps, look up like where the recipient lives and find an awesome restaurant or bakery or cafe near them and get them a gift certificate for there because they might not treat themselves to that on their own. And it feels like, wow, this person really knows me and cares about me, which you do. So like do that, you know. So the other thing I hear a lot is like, listen, I would love to shop small, but I don't have any money. A feeling I understand far too well. But you can support small business without spending any money at all. You know, one is recommending your favorite small businesses to friends, using the gram to its full potential by liking, saving and sharing posts from your favorite makers, sellers and small brands. Also commenting on their post tagging friends. I kind of love at this time of year and I encourage this so much for people to sort of start like we all have so much influence on the people around us. Like start kind of creating your own gift guides and stories to like brands you think are really cool that people should shop. I think that that is awesome and I love when I see friends of mine doing that because I'm like oh noted, I'm gonna get them that or I'm gonna check this business out because small businesses don't have marketing budget particularly that a lot of these big brands have. We don't see them on social media unfortunately. Right. And one way we can see them is by sharing them with other people. Also, I don't know about you Maggie, but I love reading Google reviews. Like it's like kind of one of my favorite things to do just as a hobby, just to unwind read some reviews of a local restaurant. So if you've shopped at or visited a business irl, please leave a nice review for them on Google Maps. People like me, we fall for it all the time. I can't go somewhere that doesn't have some great reviews. So you share the love. If even if you've only bought something from them one time ever and it was three years ago, just talk about how great it was.
- [89:15]
Maggie Greene
It's a great reminder. And I also want to share like there's definitely two or three businesses that I want to review like before the end of this year. So but also as a small business owner, I can tell you when I get a notification that someone has left me a five star Google review or any review you like, honest, you know, I'm like it's the best for it makes my entire week so it it's huge.
- [89:45]
Amanda Lee McCarty
If you're enjoying this episode then this is a great time to remind you that my work here at Close Horse is made possible by the support of listeners like you, just like NPR and these great small businesses. Please go give them your support. Blank CAS or Blanket Coats by CAS is focused on restoring, renewing and reviving the history held within vintage and heirloom textiles by embodying the love, craft and energy that is original to each vintage textile as I transfer it into a new garment. I hope we can reteach ourselves to care for and mend what we have and make it last. Blank CAS lives on Instagram at Blancas and a website will be Launched soon@blankcas.com Located in Whistler, Canada, Velvet Underground is a velvet jungle full of vintage and secondhand clothing plants, a vegan cafe and lots of rad products from other small sustainable businesses. Our mission is to create a brand and community dedicated to promoting self expression as well as educating and inspiring a more sustainable and conscious lifestyle both for the people and the planet. Find us on Instagram, Opvel, VelvetUnderground or online at www.shopvelvetunderground.com St. Evens is a New York City based vintage shop that is dedicated to bringing you those special pieces you'll reach for again and again. More than just a store, St. Evens is dedicated to sharing the stories and history behind the garments. 10% of all sales are donated to a different charitable organization each month. New Vintage is released every Thursday@wearsaintevens.com with previews of new pieces and more brought to you on Instagram at Wearst Evens. That's where St. Evans Country Feedback is a mom and pop record shop in Tarboro, North Carolina. They specialize in used rock, country and soul and offer affordable vintage clothing and housewares. Do you have used records you want to sell? Country Feedback wants to buy them? Find us on Instagram, Country Feedback Vintage and vinyl or head down east and visit our brick and mortar. All are welcome at this inclusive and family friendly record shop in the country. Republica Unicornia Yarns Handmade yarn and notions for the color Obsessed. Made with love and some swearing in fabulous Atlanta, Georgia by head yarn wench Kathleen get ready for rainbows with a side of giving a damn. Republica Unicornia is all about making your own magic using small batch, responsibly sourced hand dyed yarns and thoughtfully made notions. Slow Fashion all the way down and discover the joy of creating your very own beautiful hand knitting, knit, crocheted or woven pieces. Find us on Instagram @republicaunicorniarns and at www.republicaunicornia.com. picnic Wear a slow fashion brand ethically made by hand from vintage and dead stock materials, most notably vintage towels. Founder Dani has worked in the industry as a fashion Designer for over 10 years, but started Picnic Wear in response to her dissatisfaction with the industry's shortcomings. Picnic Wear recently moved to rural North Carolina where all their sewing and accessories are now designed and cut, but the majority of their sewing is done by skilled garment workers in New York City. Their customers take comfort in knowing that all their sewists are paid well above New York City minimum wage. Picnic wear offers minimal waste and maximum authenticity. Future Vintage over Future garbage Cute Little Ruin is an online shop dedicated to providing quality vintage and secondhand clothing, vinyl and home items in a wide range of styles and price points. If it's ethical and legal, we try to find a home for it. Vintage style with progressive values. Find us on Instagram utelittleruin Is there a little bit of Italy in your soul? Are you an enthusiast of pre loved decor and accessories? Bring vintage Italian style and history into your space. With the pewter thimble, we source useful and beautiful things and mend them where needed. We also find gorgeous illustrations and make them print worthy tarot cards, tea towels and hand picked treasures. Available to you from the comfort of your own home, responsibly sourced from across Rome, lovingly renewed by fairly paid artists and artisans with something for every budget. Discover more at theputerthimble.com Deco Denim is a startup based out of San Francisco and it sells clothing and accessories that are sustainable, gender fluid, size inclusive and high quality. Made to last for years to come. Deco Denim is trying to change the way you think about buying clothes. Founder Sarah Mattis wants to empower people to ask important questions like where was this made? Was this garment made ethically? Is this fabric made of plastic? Can this garment be upcycled? And if not, can it be recycled? Sign up@decodenim.com to receive $20 off your first purchase. They promise not to spam you and send out no more than three emails a month, with two of them surrounding education or a personal note from the founder. Again, that's decodenim.com now, the moment we've both been waiting for. It's the fourth day of slow gifting. It is secondhand gifts. Secondhand gifts are not gross. Can we just start with that? Isn't it weird that like people. I think more and more people are getting into secondhand shopping, but they draw the line at giving someone a secondhand gift? You know, why? Like, I don't know. I don't know. But have I. I hear this from people and it's like, I don't know if they're like worried that the person will be grossed out by it or think that they were being cheap. I think that we worry way too much about things that no one who receives that gift is gonna think. You know, I think that people do pick gifts because they want to like, create an image of themselves as well. It's very. It's a very complicated thing. But I can assure you, if you give someone a secondhand gift, they're just gonna know you're, like, really cool and thoughtful. So when I talk about secondhand anything on social media, everyone. Their mind goes straight to thrift stores, which is true. It is a place that you can find secondhand gifts. But there are so many other places, and I just. I have to take a moment and say how much I love an antique mall. Like, I thought that antique malls were very, like, I don't know, like Martha Stewart. Like, wealthy ladies who had a shabby chic home. Right. But actually, most antique malls are booths that are just individual sellers, Individual small businesses selling secondhand stuff. Stuff. I think the word antique implies, I don't know, like Louis XIV furniture or something.
- [97:20]
Maggie Greene
Sophistication or something.
- [97:22]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Right, Right. Yeah. But really, it's just a great place to find a lot of curated secondhand stuff all at once. I love an antique mall, and they're generally pretty affordable.
- [97:33]
Maggie Greene
There's another version of it. They're called peddler's malls. It's the exact same. I love the exact same format and the same kind of, like, layout, But I think it's more of a regional reference. So if antique is a little too fancy, you can totally look up peddlers malls.
- [97:52]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I love the word peddler. It feels so, like, I don't know, like 1800s, you know, like just a different time where people are peddling things, peddling their wares. Also, like. Like, I. I didn't get to do this this year because Austin has not been the shining beacon of yard sales that our lives in central Pennsylvania were. But let me tell you, I found a lot of awesome gifts last year at yard sales. Estate sales, the same thing. I will tell you, if you are looking for things that have never been used and probably are, like, vintage, yard sales are great for that because that's where people put out all the gifts that they got that they didn't like.
- [98:41]
Maggie Greene
That's right. That's right.
- [98:44]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah. So just saying, I've definitely bought stuff at yard sales. And the person was like, wait, you really want that? I'm like, are you kidding me? I've been looking for this my whole life. I'm like, crying tears of joy. And there was one yard sale last year where I was like, oh, my gosh, I'm sorry, we're buying so much much. Just like, we're doing our Christmas shopping, and I think they felt Sorry for me, but, like, if you saw all the cool stuff we found, they were, like, the best gifts ever. So. Yeah. So yard sales. Another one. Flea markets. Love a flea market. Vintage stores, obviously. And then, of course, there are the online platforms. Etsy, Mercari, depop, Poshmark, Vinted, Facebook Marketplace. Man, I have been hearing so many heartwarming stories of amazing gifts found on Facebook Marketplace. Like, if Meta goes bankrupt or whatever happens. Well, if Facebook Marketplace goes away, we're all gonna cry. We're all gonna be sad.
- [99:41]
Maggie Greene
It would be a big loss for sure. I found some pretty badass things on Marketplace.
- [99:46]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, seriously, it's so great. This year, for our wedding anniversary, I really wanted to get Dustin some really nice glassware for making drinks, because he has been, since the beginning of the pandemic, very into making tropical drinks, AKA what some people call tiki drinks. But we are trying to move away from that because we think, like, while we love a tropical drink, we don't like the cultural appropriation and, you know, racism. That's a part of a lot of the traditional, like, tiki culture, including a lot of the glassware. Right. So. So I really wanted to find him special glasses for the various kinds of drinks that we are making that didn't have any of that kind of iconography. And I will tell you, it took me a long time. I did a lot of research. I had many screenshots and saved tabs and all kinds of things. But I was able to get two sets of glasses that are incredible. One came from ebay, and they're, like, tall glasses with all these different tropical scenes painted on them. They're from, like, the late 60s, early 70s, and when you put them in a row, they show a full, like, panorama scene.
- [100:56]
Maggie Greene
Oh, my gosh.
- [100:57]
Amanda Lee McCarty
And then for the smaller glasses, I got him these, like, acrylic. They're also, like, late 60s, early 70s cups that look like they're bamboo, but they're plastic. And they're more for, like, you know, like a whiskey or a small drink, like that kind of thing. And those came from Etsy. Cute. So, you know, you can find amazing things on online platforms, and you can definitely, like, comparison shop. It's actually kind of fun. You know, it's like, research. Right. Which I love. And, yeah, it was really exciting to give them to him. And every time I drink out of one of them, I feel just, like, so happy. And, like, you know, there was an example of me having a really specific vision, a specific deadline, which was our anniversary, and, you know, a pretty Specific budget. And I was able to make it all work.
- [101:47]
Maggie Greene
Work.
- [101:47]
Amanda Lee McCarty
That's an example of how successfully you can curate some online gifts.
- [101:51]
Maggie Greene
I love that.
- [101:52]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Okay, so let's talk about gift ideas. I group these by types of people, but I know you're gonna have even more ideas, Maggie. So first off, and this is like, where I see myself as a gift recipient, is the people in your life who love to decorate and entertain. That is me. So vintage barware and glassware. There is so much good stuff out there from all periods of time and aesthetics. Dishes. Cute salt and pepper shakers. A fondue set is a great gift. That's something. If you go to yard sales, someone's gonna have an unopened fondue set. Yeah, yeah. And give that person some cheese or a recipe book or some chocolate or something. Like, make a whole thing out of it. Cool. Coffee table books, Unique coasters, placemats, fabric napkins, Interesting napkin rings. These are all things I see secondhand shopping all the time. Home decor books of any era are also out there. Whether your friend's really into mid century modern or is like, totally Laura Ashley 80s cottagecore, you can find these books. I know because I have them. Also. Vintage cocktail recipe books. One of our first tropical cocktail recipe books actually came from a yard sale. And it has a wooden cover. It's so cool. Like, it's made of wood.
- [103:10]
Maggie Greene
Oh, wow.
- [103:12]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Very, very cool. Thank you notes and greeting cards. I love to, like, go to all the, like, little paper craft sections of thrift stores and kind of assemble these and then put them together as like, one package for someone, like, by color or theme.
- [103:27]
Maggie Greene
Nice.
- [103:28]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Fun, right? Vintage linens, towels, potholders, trivets. It is all out there.
- [103:34]
Maggie Greene
Yeah. So what about your super stylish friend? So if Amanda is in the people who love to decorate and entertain category, this is definitely my category.
- [103:45]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Noted, noted.
- [103:46]
Maggie Greene
I want to say also as a stylist, which we'll talk about this a little bit later. Like, gifting clothing is really, really tricky. So what might you get a super stylish friend that isn't clothing? There are other wearables besides clothes, so jewelry and scarves come to mind. I'll say it's really important to be mindful of, like, metal allergies and skin sensitivities, especially with costume jewelry. And some people have nickel allergy, for example. I would also caution against rings just.
- [104:23]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Because of the size. It's weird. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think that's, like, one of the reasons I am, like, not into buying people clothing because the size thing, I mean, also just, like, personal feelings about clothing, like, makes it so complicated. It's just not worth it.
- [104:39]
Maggie Greene
Yeah, exactly.
- [104:40]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Don't do it. Yeah.
- [104:41]
Maggie Greene
Avoid it. Purses, they don't have a size, right? Those are pretty universal. But any kind of bag, makeup bags, tote bags, especially if they're in colors or, like, motifs or have iconography that, you know, the recipient loves, they're gonna freak out and think that it was picked just for them, which is the goal.
- [105:03]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, yeah.
- [105:05]
Maggie Greene
Luggage, overnight bags, backpacks, fanny packs. Oh, my gosh. I'm sure thrift stores and vintage shops are loaded with those right now.
- [105:14]
Amanda Lee McCarty
So many. I can. I can vouch for you. I have seen many fanny packs recently.
- [105:19]
Maggie Greene
Fancier, like, you know, upscale brands that maybe they. They couldn't afford to buy brand new. You see a lot of these in thrift stores. Thrift stores and those antique mall kind of environments. Look at the label. If, you know it's a brand that they have, like, an affinity for, that would be a really cool gift. I loved this idea. Amanda. Cute mirror, especially vintage. I actually have a. An heirloom set. It's like a hand mirror, a comb, and a brush. And it's silver and it's really, really fancy. It's like. Like I said, it's an heirloom, right? So this is three generations old. And I just. Ah, it's the coolest thing. It's gonna last forever.
- [106:06]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I love that. And that's something that someone's not gonna buy for themselves.
- [106:11]
Maggie Greene
Right.
- [106:11]
Amanda Lee McCarty
You know, but it's gonna be so.
- [106:13]
Maggie Greene
Delighted to receive organizational types of containers for things like makeup, brushes, and products. Products. Like, and I'll say be creative about this, especially when you're buying second hand. Right? Like, you're not gonna necessarily encounter things that are marketed as, you know. This is a makeup brush holder. So like old vases or tins and ceramic containers. Vases, things like that are great for those purposes. This is a little bit frivolous, this. And, like, not the most practical or useful gift, but I just learned about it, and I was, like, instantly obsessed when I saw it. It's kind of like a music box. So it's got that interactive element, but it's a lipstick carousel.
- [107:02]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Okay, tell me more. This seems so glamorous.
- [107:05]
Maggie Greene
Yeah, it's very much a rare vintage gym kind of find. Like, if you find one, you've got to get it. There's gotta be someone in your life that would love this as a gift. But it's basically like, you know, it looks Like a music box. So it rotates, but it has these as it turns. There's like a little panel that opens to reveal a little slot that's big enough for a tube of lipstick and a long little mirror so that you can, like, pick the lipstick out and apply it as it's turning. It's just a really cool thing. Wow, Another vintage item. Again, this is for your stylish friend, right? Chatelaines are pretty amazing little things. Again, not the most, like, useful or practical, but if your friend is stylish, if they love anything vintage and retro, they will likely appreciate a chatelaine. They come in different sizes. They can be worn as jewelry, which is cool, but each one I've ever seen seen as, like, unique. Sometimes there's a. A tiny pair of scissors and a thimble.
- [108:11]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I love these so much.
- [108:13]
Maggie Greene
Yeah, they're really cool jewelry trees. So, you know, this could be something that just like some sort of wire element, you know, standalone element, maybe. It's not marketed as a jewelry holder, but could accommodate, like, necklaces and bracelets and again, like, metal containers with lids, whether they're velvet lined or not. Old boxes, like wooden boxes with glass tops, ceramic containers, all of those are really great things for storing jewelry. Little kind of keepsakes.
- [108:52]
Amanda Lee McCarty
And I see so many amazing versions of all of these things everywhere I go because they were such a common gift in the past. You know, they're out there in the world, and I'm sure you could buy some of these things new, but they're just not going to be as special. You know, there's just something. I mean, I'm gonna say this, like, probably 10,000 more times, but there is something so special about a secondhand gift because it really shows the care and the thought that you put into it. It's just, like, so amazing. Okay, so I'm gonna talk about another person that I definitely am when it comes to gifts. And I is a gift tactic that I take a lot is nostalgia lovers. So really appealing to things that remind people of maybe their childhood or very specific times in their lives or even times that I knew them or first met them or memories that we share together. So old issues of Favorite magazine. Seriously, if you want to show your love for me, send me a copy of Sassy, because I'm trying to track them down.
- [109:57]
Maggie Greene
I was thinking Alloy. Do you remember Alloy?
- [110:01]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I sure do. You could also send me an Alloy or Delia's catalog, and I would also be beyond. I would be very excited. Favorite childhood toys are also great. Last year Dustin found a vintage from the 80s Strawberry Shortcake doll for me, and that just made me so, so happy. Records are great if you, like, like someone in your life, like, has a record player or like, is really into records. This one can be a little challenging if they're a hardcore collector. Like, I personally would not buy a record for Dustin because he's way too snobby, but I would probably buy a record for Dylan. Nostalgic young adult books. Seriously, I've given away so many copies of, like, Babysitter's Club and Judy Bloom book books over the years that I have thrifted, and they always make people smile. Vintage logo apparel. Like, specifically, this is where I. I don't think you should buy people clothes. But if you saw, like, an Esprit sweatshirt or, like, I don't know, some other brand your friend was really into in high school and you found it thrifting or secondhand, like, I say go for it because they're gonna love it, even if it doesn't fit super well. Also, I would say vintage signs and ads can be really cool, especially if you, like, frame them in a cool frame that you could also shop secondhand. Original, vintage, and tasteful reproductions of favorite childhood icons. And I know, Maggie, you have someone, a celebrity, an icon that you love. Yeah.
- [111:43]
Maggie Greene
One of the best secondhand gifts I've ever received is. Is this. I don't know when it was made. Maybe the seventies. It's a vintage Miss Piggy Piggy Bank. Ah. She lives on my mantel. She's got a couple pieces of loose change in her, but she's really just there to, like, look beautiful and remind me of how amazing she is. It's like a. It's a hallmark of our, like, home decor is my Miss Piggy Bank.
- [112:10]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I love it. I see a lot, lot of that kind of stuff. There was definitely a trend, I would say, in the 70s and 80s for, like, ceramicists, like local ceramicists to make reproduction banks of these characters like Miss Piggy and Strawberry Shortcake and other characters as well, because I have a bunch of them sitting on my front porch. And now if I see another Miss Piggy Bank, I can't buy it. But it's good to know that, Maggie, it would be a good gift for you. But I see these quite often, and anytime I show someone a picture of one that I've seen or found, they are beyond. So I'm sure that they would love to receive one for themselves. And the same can go for all kinds of toys, man. Sometimes my Favorite part of an antique mall is there's always a few booths that are really focused on toys. And, man, just the memories. And some of these toys, I'm like, I want them all, but, like, I obviously don't have a place for them. Like, I would say, if I ever had a much bigger house and more time on my hands, I would love to have a room where one wall was just shelves that had all of the little people houses. Like the Fisher Price little people houses. I know, right? What a dream, right? I know other people love things like that, too. So, you know, these are great gift ideas. Also books by authors that you know that your friend likes or maybe you is like, it's a really important book for you that you know that they would like. I really high rec. Like, secondhand books. I think, like, shopping secondhand books is sort of the gateway into the secondhand first lifestyle. And so I think, especially if you can find a book with, like, a really cool cover, like, I mean, obviously a book that you know that they want to read, but that has. Is an edition with a really cool cover that can also be an amazing gift. And no one's going to be like, ew, a secondhand book. And if they are, you should probably stop talking to them.
- [114:09]
Maggie Greene
Yeah. Get some new friends. Exactly.
- [114:12]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Get some new friends. Exactly. All right, your turn.
- [114:16]
Maggie Greene
Honestly, I consider myself in this category, too. The crafty people in your life. We've all got a crafty friend or maybe multiple crafty friends. Right? They're always.
- [114:25]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Hopefully a lot.
- [114:26]
Maggie Greene
Yeah.
- [114:26]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yes.
- [114:27]
Maggie Greene
They've got some kind of creative project going at all times. These are probably the people who are making gifts for you for the holidays. So what are some gift ideas? Secondhand gift ideas for them. Sewing notions, like fabrics and trim. So when we say notions, if you're not a member of the sewing community, this might not be familiar to you. Notions are all the things. We're talking straight pins and needles and bobbins and thimbles and safety pins and all the things. So sewing notions, fabrics and trims. Oh, my gosh. Like, the volume of vintage trims and fabrics that you can find. Just like we were talking about the, like, the stationery and paper kind of aisle in the thrift store. There's always a little corner with craft stuff, and you're gonna find fabric remnants and trims. Unopened craft kit kits.
- [115:24]
Amanda Lee McCarty
So many. So many unopened craft kits. It makes me sad.
- [115:30]
Maggie Greene
Pay attention. Because if they're, like, ancient, you know, especially if it's like a paint set or Something they, they may not work, but things like colored pencils, markers, really nice pens. This is. These are gifts that people get and end up donating to the thrift store.
- [115:47]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Right.
- [115:47]
Maggie Greene
That they didn't necessarily want.
- [115:49]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Always is when I see those kits, because I like, I personally love a secondhand latch hook kit. And latch hook is great because it's one of those things that you can do without, like a ton of skill or even paying attention. So you can, like, watch a movie and suddenly you've got a wall hanging of Garfield.
- [116:07]
Maggie Greene
Right.
- [116:08]
Amanda Lee McCarty
It just happens. I see so many of those kits unopened at thrift stores, and I think it's because they were gifts and people were like it. I don't want a Garfield wall hanging, which is a red flag, but they're out there. And I think that they are a great gift too, and can be fun for people who have, like, a lot of nostalgia.
- [116:24]
Maggie Greene
Yeah. And especially people who like to do creative things. Your. Your crafty friends, right?
- [116:29]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah. Yeah.
- [116:30]
Maggie Greene
So we're talking about secondhand books for your nostalgia loving friends. This is another area that works really well for crafty people. So old, you know, vintage secondhand crafting and sewing books, sewing baskets and knitting bags. These are any baskets, any bags, but there are ones that are specific for sewing and knitting to hold all their notions, hold all their goodies. Right. Needles, hooks and yarn. For knitters and crocheters, certainly scrapbooking supplies.
- [117:05]
Amanda Lee McCarty
So many of those. Have you ever been involved in scrapbooking?
- [117:10]
Maggie Greene
No. I was just thinking that, like, it's something that was kind of interesting to me at times, but I've never, like, gone down the rabbit hole. However, I had a friend in college who. He just. He was kind of a collector of things anyway, and he had this giant collection of vintage postage stamps that he ended up gifting to me. And some of them were like, like actual, you know, like you could have mailed a letter with them back in the day. But some of them were like more novelty collectors items. There were like, they weren't National Geographic produced, but it was like different species of animals and birds and just like really cool plants and things. Yeah. And I. I ended up framing them. Like, I put them in collections and then framed name the collections. It ended up being really cool decor. So that'd be an idea for a crafty friend, right?
- [118:10]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah. I think that's an amazing idea.
- [118:13]
Maggie Greene
Stamps and ink. That's a really good idea too. That kind of fits in with scrapbooking. But like, anyone who likes to put a personalized note Handwritten note together. Stamps and ink is great.
- [118:25]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Oh, my gosh, there's so many. You know, a couple years ago, I was like, I want to get some horror horse stamps so I can send out. When I send out, you know, mail related to closed horse, I can put a horse stamp on it. Right. And you would think like, oh, well, you know, the. The curse of thrifting is like, you know, you go in with an idea and you often don't find it right away. And I'm gonna tell you, first thrift store I go into, I roll into the craft section easily. 20 horse stamps to choose from.
- [118:50]
Maggie Greene
Oh, how did you pick horses?
- [118:52]
Amanda Lee McCarty
It was. It was difficult. I mean, there was, like, hand ringing. Like, Dustin was there. We had the. We narrowed it down and we were like, okay, now we have these. Like, what do we think is next? I mean, that is just how many horse stamps there were. And so many ink pads that no one had ever used that were, like, still sealed. I mean, such a bummer. I think that people crafting is one of those things where people are like, I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna get into crafting. I'm gonna change my life. Right? Then they get the stuff, and then they're like, oh, I'm too busy surviving. I can't do these crafts.
- [119:22]
Maggie Greene
Yeah.
- [119:22]
Amanda Lee McCarty
And then they end up at the thrift store or the yard sale or wherever.
- [119:26]
Maggie Greene
So that's a good point, Amanda. Actually, like, something that is true about crafty people. They would love any and all of these things on this list. But also, like, don't get all the things on the list. You know, don't overwhelm them, because chances are they've got part of a room or a dedicated space of some kind that's just like all these crafty craft supplies that they had great intentions of using and never good. So be strategic and thoughtful. You know, think small.
- [119:57]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah. Themed. Like, I think you can. You can very easily put together a little, like, gift bag, gift basket, gift tin, whatever you want to use as your vessel of, like, this is the stuff you need to make a horse themed notebook or something. You know, it has to be horse themed is like, the only rule now.
- [120:16]
Maggie Greene
Well, for. For you. Right. As the crafty person and the lover of Noel.
- [120:21]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Horse or cat gifts only. Right.
- [120:25]
Maggie Greene
So we talked about clothing and apparel being a bit of a. No, no.
- [120:29]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah.
- [120:29]
Maggie Greene
Vintage sewing patterns are a great way to go for things that are not clothing. Like aprons. Right. Apron patterns would be really cool.
- [120:41]
Amanda Lee McCarty
So good.
- [120:42]
Maggie Greene
Plus, like, digging through the. The Totes or baskets or whatever they have them stored in at the thrift store. Right. It varies, but digging through them is a fun exercise to find just the right one.
- [120:55]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Super fun. Yeah, yeah. And wow, there are so many patterns at every store I go to. So many tote bag patterns.
- [121:04]
Maggie Greene
You're probably going to find instructions on how to make rag rugs out of like fabric scraps and remnants. Photo albums. This is kind of like in scrapbooking neighborhood too. But whether it's themed or associated with scrapbooks or not, like empty, unused photo albums can be repurposed and upcycled into so many different kinds of things that they could re gift, potentially even.
- [121:33]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, yeah. Circular gifting. I like that.
- [121:38]
Maggie Greene
Lock boxes or like I was talking about earlier with the stylish friend, like jewelry type of boxes, wooden vintage tin boxes or baskets that you can fill with things like homemade cookies or sewing and craft notions. Also journals. Maybe not necessarily with the intended purpose of being a traditional journal journal, but a lot of crafters I know and sewists and designers, they take notes as they're, you know, doing their projects and it's like this is a way to keep track of what's working, what's not. Maybe the materials lists that they need. Journals and notebooks are really, really great gifts for crafty folks.
- [122:22]
Amanda Lee McCarty
They really are because the potential is endless. Seriously. And there are a lot of those too at all the thrift stores I guess go to. So next are the home chefs, which I definitely fancy myself a home chef. Not to brag, but I do cook a full on dinner most days. Cooking is like one of my favorite things to do because one, it's kind of instant gratification and two, for me it helps divide my daytime work from whatever comes after that. Right. It's like my time to myself to listen to podcasts, podcasts or NPR and just like make something, you know. So I have found that a lot of people, specifically millennials and gen zers, like we don't have a lot of great kitchen stuff because we maybe are just learning how to cook or were forced to cook during the pandemic and are trying to get it down. And wow, there are so many amazing kitchen things and every secondhand store I visit. So one, if you can find some Le Creuset, buy that because you are going to make someone's day. I would say the same thing with anything cast iron. I bought an amazing cast iron griddle for my stove a couple years ago for 10 bucks at the thrift store and I use it almost every day because I can flip it on one side and like grill tofu and vegetables or flip it the other way and make like quesadillas or pancakes or something. Definitely. If someone had given that to me as a gift, I would have, like, wept tears of joy and thought of them constantly for giving me such a great gift. Unique serving dishes and utensils. If you're going to get into cooking, you start, you reach a point where you're like, now I'm going to get hung up on presentation. Especially if you've spent the pandemic watching a lot of Master Chef, you're going to get hung up on plating. So. So these are great gifts for people as well. Vintage tea towels, always a great gift, especially if it's like they're the ones that you will see that are calendars from years. And if you know the gift recipient's year of birth, that's a great gift to find them that towel from that year. I see a lot of those when I'm out secondhand shopping. Let me tell you about small appliances. There are so many very specific small appliances that are a life upgrade that people have been gifted and never used. And I have been proud to swoop in and buy them and use them. And that includes food dehydrators. You have not lived until you've made your own dried mango. It is so good. Blenders need those if you're gonna have tropical drinks. Anyway, ice cream makers, okay, this is the one that I don't have. And that is. I'm upset with myself about it because I actually, a few years ago, saw the ice cream maker that goes with my KitchenAid mixer at a thrift store and I second guessed myself that maybe I wouldn't make enough ice cream to make it worthwhile. And now I think about it all the time. So ice cream maker is another thing that people wouldn't buy for themselves but would probably be pretty stoked to have if they are a person who loves making that kind of stuff. Right. Emphasis here is on small and useful things. Like, remember bread makers. People not loving bread makers. Maybe skip that. Unless your friend really does love some bread. Like low key. I kind of wish I had a bread maker because Dustin loves bread. It'd be great to be like, surprise, I made you this loaf. But I didn't do any work at all. You know, cookbooks. I mean, I feel like we've talked about books in almost every category, so so far. But man, there are so many good cookbooks to be found thrifting. And I Am actually a collector of cookbooks for them. I collect both, like mid century. I really love 50s, 60s, 70s cookbooks for the photography, not specifically for the recipes. But I also really love contemporary cookbooks that are like specific to genres of food that I like. And I have been surprised by how many of them I. I have been able to find thrifting, even. Like I really wanted like, you know, the classic Martha Stewart cookbook, and I found one that I swear had never even been opened.
- [126:34]
Maggie Greene
Nice.
- [126:35]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah. So I love a cookbook. And listen, yes, you can get recipes in your phone. I've had this conversation with other people, but there is something about having the cookbook open right there in front of you, making that recipe, loving it, and putting a bookmark in there and revisiting it it all the time. I do that so often. Pyrex and casserole dishes. Now this, this stuff can get spendy. There's a big collector's market in there. You don't have to get someone a full set. But even to get them one nice casserole dish with a glass lid is a great gift that they'll use all the time. You obviously want to avoid pieces with signs of deterioration, like cracking or pitting of the glaze. However, there have been rumors going around the Internet, I know because many people have reached out to me about them over the years, that vintage Pyrex and other dishware contain unsafe levels of lead. And I have news for you that Snopes did a bunch of research into the vintage Pyrex claim and it was debunked. So vintage Pyrex is safe to use just once again, like, you don't want it to be cracking or chipping or like, basically you don't want your, your loved ones to be getting little pieces of ceramic in their mouths when they're eating. Right. So you want to get one that's in good shape and. And I think you would do that anyway. But just like throwing it out there. If you are concerned about lead in vintage dishes or silverware, et cetera. I did a lot of research into this a few months ago because someone asked me on Instagram. And when it comes to utensils like forks, knife, spoons, serving spoons, I recommend going for real silver, which sounds, I know, so bougie, but actually you would be surprised about the sheer volume and low price of real silver at thrift stores and antique malls. And then plus you can be like, oh, I'm polishing my silver. What? It sounds so luxurious, right? And then in terms of like other dishware. If you're really stressed about that, you can buy these little lead swabs that are very inexpensive and give you instant results. So if that's something you're concerned about too. So that's home chefs. That was a lot. Okay. The last thing that we wanted to talk about is all the important finishing touches, which are things like a basket, wrapping paper, gift bags, bows, greeting cards, ribbon, artificial flowers. What else did I miss here? There's like, all the things. All the things. Why is there so much wrapping paper at the thrift store? There always is. And always bags of bows. Have you noticed this?
- [129:12]
Maggie Greene
Yep.
- [129:13]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah. And baskets, man.
- [129:16]
Maggie Greene
There's usually a whole aisle of baskets.
- [129:19]
Amanda Lee McCarty
No one should ever buy a new basket again for at least the next 10 years. So we can let the basket economy reset itself.
- [129:27]
Maggie Greene
Yeah, we've got a surplus right now. No shirt. Yeah.
- [129:30]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I also love a tin, especially if you're gonna bake for other people. And there's always a plethora of tins.
- [129:36]
Maggie Greene
Christmas themed and otherwise.
- [129:39]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And tins are great because they're reusable. And so I found so tins on my yard saling adventures that, like, I low key have a supply in the cabinet for when I'm gonna make food for someone as a gift. And, you know, if they don't give it back, that's okay, but most of the time they do because. Not because I ask, but because they're like, wow, this tin was so cute. I just. I just want you to have it back. You know, I'm like, thank you. So much better than using a plastic bag or anything disposable. Right? Like, like, these tins are like the gift that keeps giving. And I. I know because I've done this myself, that you can wrap and present all of your holiday gifts without buying a single new piece of wrapping paper, ribbon, or anything. You might. You might need some scotch tape. That's about it.
- [130:30]
Maggie Greene
Yeah. I've heard of people using, like, fabric, like, from their fabric stash, or like, totally vintage sheets, even like, that they cut up and wrap instead of using paper or something. Disposable. There's no limit. And you actually, you don't have to wrap it. Whatever the gift is, you don't necessarily.
- [130:51]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Have to wrap the gift.
- [130:52]
Maggie Greene
Right.
- [130:55]
Amanda Lee McCarty
One thing I did one year is I had a really special gift for someone that was really. It wasn't really big, but it was going to be difficult to wrap. And so I put a blanket over it, and I was like, okay, like, drum roll. And Then, like, we made a drum roll, and then I ripped the blanket off of it, and it was very exciting.
- [131:15]
Maggie Greene
I love that.
- [131:17]
Amanda Lee McCarty
So you don't. You don't need to rap. I don't rap. Is. I don't know how many times you've been late, get like, family Christmas or whatever, and there's a trash bag there just getting filled as people unwrap gifts. It's just such a bummer. Such a bummer.
- [131:32]
Maggie Greene
So much waste. The best wrapping. I should tell you this. The best. One of the best gifts I've ever received from a friend was a Shop Vac. Like, how profitable.
- [131:41]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Oh, my God. You told me about this before, and I was jealous because you don't know how good life can be until you have a Shop Vac.
- [131:49]
Maggie Greene
I mean, I. And it. I had it for over 10 years. Like, I think I just retired it in the last year or two. But they. They did not wrap it. It. They put one little bow on the outs, like the top outside of the box. And I just. I thought that was perfect.
- [132:04]
Amanda Lee McCarty
I love that. And yeah, like, wow. We found a. We found a Shop Vac at a yard sale a few years ago, and, man, game changer. I guess that means you're an adult when you are so pumped on a Shop Vac, but, yeah, that's a really great gift. So something you brought up, which I think is. I really want us to discuss. Yes. Is the concept of regifting and removing the stigma. I think that. And I might be remembering this wrong. I think that there was an episode of Seinfeld about regifting that really stigmatized it even more. But I want to hear your thoughts on regifting. I know you. I know what they are, but I want everybody else to hear them.
- [132:47]
Maggie Greene
You know, we're. We're talking about the. This, like, wave of stuff that gets donated to the thrift store or, like, thrown away or discarded or put at yard sales. Like, of the gifts that people receive that they don't really want or use. Right. This is a way to redistribute those things. So in that way, like that. That's a selling point of regifting. The other thing that comes to mind is with regifting, you do want to be careful to not re. Gift the gift to the original person who got you the gift in the first place. So that's like just a cautionary tale, like, make sure you keep track of who gifted you what. Right. And when, probably. But, yeah, I don't know. I think there is definitely a stigma around it. It's like holding. There's some weird obligation about holding on to something. Like they're attaching some meaning to it because it came from this specific person or there's some perceived like sentimental value. When I mean in actuality, the sentimentality comes from the memory. You can still have that moment and cherish that gesture without like the stuff itself, like just sitting there collecting dust or not serving a purpose or bringing value to your life. Like re gifting, I think is like kind of flattering actually. It's like this, this is useful enough. I see enough value in it that I'm going to put it back into the world and make sure that someone gets use out of it because I'm not serving it well by not by not using it and appreciating it myself. So I'm going to pass it on. Right. It's a waste saving exercise too, you know.
- [134:39]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Absolutely. I mean, I think the goal for all of this is like no matter where the gift came from, is for the gift to be used and loved, you know, and not sit in a closet until it inevitably ends up at the goodwill. That's the point of it all. And I think that when you fully understand that and embrace that, it really changes the whole. The whole thought process around gifting, you know, it's not just about fulfilling this obligation. It's about putting the right stuff in the right home, you know. And I think, yeah, I think re gifting is fine. I mean, listen, if you have a friend who loves some bath and body works lotions, I bet you have some hiding in a drawer somewhere that someone gave you five years ago or something.
- [135:27]
Maggie Greene
Some stupid office party gift exchange. That's right.
- [135:31]
Amanda Lee McCarty
Y Totally. Totally. Exactly. Exactly. Thanks again to Maggie for spending so much time with me. I mean seriously, it was like four hours. She will be back next week for the second half of the 12 Days of Slow gifting when we will talk about Black Friday gifts and art yarn stuff, the myth of free shipping gifts you can make, and so many other things. You can find Maggie on Instagram as eenstylemags. You can check out all of the things she does@maggiegreenstyle.com and of course all of that will be in the show notes. All right, well this. This is a long episode so I'm going to wrap it up here. I hope that you are already starting to get a lot of ideas about how you can incorporate slow gifting into your life. Not just for the next few weeks, but also year round because we give gifts all the time. And I I love giving gifts and it's not something I ever want to quit doing, but I do love doing it in a different, more thoughtful, more meaningful way. It has actually made the very enjoyable experience of giving gifts even more lovely and wonderful. Please follow along with the entire Slow Gifting series. I'm making tons of content around this for the next few weeks. You'll find it all on Instagram and I look forward to seeing and hearing what all of you are doing this year as part of the Slow Gifting Revolution. Thanks for listening to another episode of Clotheshorse. Written, researched, edited, hosted all the things by me. Amanda Lee McCarty if you like what you're hearing, please leave a rating, maybe even a review. I love a positive review on Apple Podcasts and most importantly, recommend the show to a friend. Let's get everybody on board with a Slow Gifting Revolution. If you'd like to support my work financially, you can learn more@patreon.com closehorsepodcast and thanks as always to my other half, Dustin Travis White for our music and audio support. Bye.