Cheech and Chong | Club Random with Bill Maher

Summary

Podcast Summary: Club Random with Bill Maher – Episode Featuring Cheech Marin and Tommy Chong

Episode Details:

• Title: Cheech and Chong | Club Random with Bill Maher
• Release Date: October 6, 2024
• Host: Bill Maher
• Guests: Cheech Marin and Tommy Chong

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1. Reunion and Nostalgia Bill Maher welcomes the iconic comedy duo Cheech Marin and Tommy Chong to the show, reminiscing about their long-standing friendship and collaborative history. The conversation kicks off with light-hearted banter about their enduring partnership and shared memories from their early days in comedy.

Notable Quote:

• Tommy Chong [02:10]: "I owe you such a debt because you made this possible in many ways."

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2. Reflections on Comedy and Personal Growth The trio delves into their experiences in the entertainment industry, discussing the evolution of their comedy styles and the challenges they've faced over the decades. They reflect on the transition from performing in clubs to adapting to modern platforms like podcasts.

Notable Quote:

• Cheech Marin [04:10]: "I've told my kids, listen, if you're gonna do drugs, replace them."

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3. Experiences with the Legal System Cheech and Tommy share amusing and eye-opening anecdotes from their encounters with the legal system. They recount incidents of being arrested during performances and the absurdities they faced while navigating jail life.

Notable Quotes:

• Cheech Marin [07:38]: "They attacked me and sentenced me on 9/11."
• Tommy Chong [20:00]: "Anal sex makes your ass so sore."

---

4. Perspectives on Marijuana Legalization The conversation shifts to the topic of marijuana, with both Cheech and Tommy advocating for its benefits and discussing its impact on their lives and careers. They touch upon the misconceptions surrounding marijuana use and its cultural significance.

Notable Quote:

• Tommy Chong [04:24]: "We like pot, so. Yeah, I started smoking when I was 19."

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5. Aging and Lifestyle Changes The guests openly discuss the realities of aging, including changes in physical health, lifestyle adjustments, and maintaining relationships. They explore how their careers and personal lives have adapted as they've grown older.

Notable Quote:

• Cheech Marin [34:30]: "When I get out of a car can be a half a day workout."

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6. Technology and Social Media Bill Maher raises concerns about the pervasive influence of technology and social media, leading to a candid discussion on how these platforms affect attention spans, societal behavior, and personal interactions. The trio expresses skepticism about the benefits of constant digital engagement.

Notable Quote:

• Tommy Chong [50:48]: "China is TikTok. Am I wrong?"

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7. Travel Memories and Cultural Observations The guests share vivid memories from their travels, particularly in cities like Amsterdam, Paris, and Mexico City. They discuss cultural differences, the evolution of these places over time, and their personal experiences interacting with diverse communities.

Notable Quote:

• Cheech Marin [54:22]: "We've toured Europe once, like four cities doing stand-up. It was fine, but it wasn't for me."

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8. Political Commentary and Current Events Bill Maher steers the conversation towards current political climates, focusing on figures like Donald Trump and the dynamics between the U.S. and China. The guests offer their critiques and share their perspectives on international relations and domestic policies.

Notable Quotes:

• Tommy Chong [73:57]: "Everyone in the 90s, they hit women in movies. Like the Good Guy."
• Cheech Marin [76:18]: "We'll owe it all to him."

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9. Family and Legacy The discussion turns to family life, grandparenthood, and the legacy they hope to leave for their grandchildren. They reflect on balancing careers with personal relationships and the importance of passing down values.

Notable Quote:

• Cheech Marin [46:07]: "I've always been Grandpa."

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10. Closing Thoughts and Mutual Respect In the final segments, Bill, Cheech, and Tommy emphasize the importance of mutual respect and understanding despite differences. They acknowledge the challenges of maintaining long-term relationships in the entertainment industry and express gratitude for their enduring friendship.

Notable Quote:

• Tommy Chong [99:10]: "We're all mixed together now. But, you know, Ireland had black athletes. The only country no blacks, Russia."

---

Conclusion: This episode of Club Random with Bill Maher offers a heartfelt and humorous exploration of the intertwined lives of Bill Maher, Cheech Marin, and Tommy Chong. From nostalgic reminiscences to sharp political insights, the conversation provides listeners with an engaging blend of personal anecdotes and thoughtful commentary on contemporary issues. The inclusion of notable quotes with timestamps adds depth, allowing both longtime fans and new listeners to appreciate the rich dynamics and enduring bond among the guests.

Transcript

[Bill Maher]

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[Tommy Chong]

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[Bill Maher]

I want to start a campaign that teaching Chong should be in the Rock and Roll hall of Fame.

[Tommy Chong]

He should be in the Rock and Roll hall of Fame. The Comedy hall of Fame Club.

[Cheech Marin]

Random.

[Bill Maher]

Random. Random.

[Cheech Marin]

And I realized because I'm a comedian, I can entertain the out of myself.

[Bill Maher]

Claude Randall.

[Tommy Chong]

Okay, I have people I cannot believe I get to talk to.

[Bill Maher]

What's up, bro?

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, I am so.

[Bill Maher]

Hey, man.

[Tommy Chong]

How are you kveling? Thank you.

[Bill Maher]

You've been a while since James.

[Tommy Chong]

I don't know what to say. It's what a day. As you can see, I dressed up for you. I don't usually.

[Bill Maher]

I know it was very cool.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, just because I feel.

[Bill Maher]

And we come. We're geeks bearing gifts.

[Tommy Chong]

Me too. And of course, I'm nervous. It will live up to the approval of the gods. But, you know, I stand on your shoulders in many ways as. No, as a comedian of some years who has, among my bag of tricks, certainly traded on my reputation for enjoying marijuana. This is good for you a lot. And had a zillion lines and jokes that work. Because that was. But that all came from you. You guys did. You did it best. You are the OGs of that.

[Bill Maher]

No extra charge. You're doing good.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, don't be on his show that he's got bad knees.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, I got bad knees.

[Cheech Marin]

Jump on me.

[Tommy Chong]

Okay. But, like, look, for those many in this country who have said, and some still do, that marijuana isn't good for you, I would say you guys look great. And you guys are old.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Really?

[Bill Maher]

He's old.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, like, I'm old. But you're really old.

[Bill Maher]

He's really old.

[Tommy Chong]

And you're still here. And you look healthy. What does that say about the wacky weed for do, by the way? No one who's a real stoner would ever say wacky weed. I would just like. Am I right?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, you're right.

[Tommy Chong]

We like short wheat, so. Yeah, I started smoking in. When I was 19.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Wow.

[Cheech Marin]

Where you're from? Originally?

[Tommy Chong]

New Jersey.

[Cheech Marin]

Oh. Oh, you're Jersey. Oh, you're a Jersey guy.

[Bill Maher]

Jersey started in 1902.

[Tommy Chong]

I feel that was better because, you know, first of all, kids shouldn't do drugs.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

We can all agree on that, right?

[Bill Maher]

Sure.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, let's hear a little enthusiasm about it.

[Cheech Marin]

Okay.

[Tommy Chong]

Kids shouldn't do drugs if it's good on our side. A little.

[Cheech Marin]

I've told my kids, listen, if you're gonna do drugs, replace them.

[Tommy Chong]

That's awesome.

[Cheech Marin]

That's what I told them.

[Tommy Chong]

You know, it's funny you mentioned that, because sometime in the 80s, hanging out with a group of people and one night, your daughter was in the mix. She was so much fun. She was awesome. And I remember her saying, like, yeah, I don't smoke pot anymore. And my father's kind of disappointed in me.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah, that's true.

[Bill Maher]

Is rd.

[Tommy Chong]

And I remember thinking, you know, like, whatever parents do, the kids will rebel.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. No matter what.

[Tommy Chong]

You want them not to smoke pot. Each army charm.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah, both of them.

[Bill Maher]

So your show's doing well. Very good. Everything is good.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, this one. Well, you know, again, I owe you such a debt because you made this possible in many ways. That I could have a show, I guess. Podcasts or shows. Yeah. I certainly don't run it like a show or my show or anything, but my life. I mean, that's what I mean. I was always doing this anyway on a Wednesday afternoon. But just the fact that I can have a second show. Cause I sure wouldn't get stoned for real time with all the politicians and stuff. But that I can do it here and it's accepted. And I mean, we've come a long way.

[Bill Maher]

A long way. In a short.

[Tommy Chong]

A long way.

[Bill Maher]

Comparatively short time. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, you even did time, right.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, he went to the Rock.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah. In fact, you came. We did a Pauly Shore roast at the Comedy Store. And you came down to hear I just got out of jail. And Bill came down, he wanted to hear me on stage with Pauly Shore. And it was short. It was, you know, because this is Pauly Shore. What are you going to say?

[Tommy Chong]

What year is this?

[Bill Maher]

Do not try to apprehend this man.

[Tommy Chong]

Because I have zero recollection I got out of jail. Maybe they're right about that with the pot.

[Cheech Marin]

I got out of jail. It was just one moment.

[Tommy Chong]

Why did you go. You were selling bongs or some shit?

[Cheech Marin]

No. Yeah. No, I went in for. Yeah, because I was selling. My company was selling bonds.

[Tommy Chong]

See, I just don't think that would happen today.

[Bill Maher]

You don't know the right DA in the right town. It happened. It can happen.

[Cheech Marin]

Really?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. That's what it was.

[Tommy Chong]

Maybe I'm being sanguine about it, but, like.

[Cheech Marin]

No, they had a hit on me.

[Tommy Chong]

A hit?

[Cheech Marin]

The Bush family.

[Tommy Chong]

To kill you?

[Cheech Marin]

No, no, to. He was. He was invading Iraq. And so they needed some sort of.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, I see.

[Cheech Marin]

Hippie bullshit.

[Tommy Chong]

Wag the dog.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah. And so they would.

[Tommy Chong]

You want to wag the dog?

[Cheech Marin]

So they attacked me and they sentenced me on 9 11.

[Tommy Chong]

Really?

[Cheech Marin]

That's. That's when they sentenced me on 9 11. And they expected a big protest, you know, and the one guy showed up with a sign saying free marijuana.

[Bill Maher]

Free marijuana.

[Cheech Marin]

Was he giving it away? No, that's why no one figured that one out.

[Tommy Chong]

That's genius. That's why it's so good. Yeah, That's a scream.

[Cheech Marin]

Free marijuana. And that was it. And the judge, Schwartz was his name. And he had a reputation of doing whatever the Bush people want has done. And so that's why he was giving my thing. Because when I went to court, they were saying things, you know, they were reading off the charges and I'm trying to be as honest as I can. And when they said that I own the company, I had to correct them and say, no, I don't. And so they had to stop the whole proceedings. You got and say, well, just a minute, we agreed that you're going to plead guilty. And so they were doing this.

[Tommy Chong]

So Soviet. So Soviet. Right.

[Cheech Marin]

That's what it was.

[Bill Maher]

They needed a face for their campaign because they were going after paraphernalia on the Internet.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

And they needed a face for it.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. Right.

[Bill Maher]

Enter the face.

[Cheech Marin]

And the fact that. And the name Chong didn't help, you know, because, you know, when they see Chong, right away they think Chinese, you know.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, that's what I think.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

And that's what the court, everybody else. And so when they're going after someone, Chong was perfect.

[Tommy Chong]

And you think they wanted to get Chinese more than.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, the Chinese name didn't help. And who is this guy?

[Bill Maher]

But all the Chinese always come up to him. How come your name Chong?

[Tommy Chong]

I don't know if even the Bushes were going after the Chinese.

[Bill Maher]

I don't know.

[Tommy Chong]

In 2004, I mean, China, the country. I've complained about this many times on my other show. I don't want to get too political, but, like, one of the problems with the left, I think, is that they see everything through the prism of race. So they're way too easy on China, which does horrible fucking things all over. Horrible, illiberal, dictatorial, anti freedom, anti human things.

[Bill Maher]

They would run over a guy with a tank on tv.

[Cheech Marin]

They would.

[Bill Maher]

They'd run over a guy with a tank.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, they did. Right. But, you know, because it could be seen as racist, you know, they wouldn't say, for example, that the COVID virus escaped from a lab and it wasn't even accusing China of doing it on purpose, which you could. It's possible. I don't think it was, but I do think it escaped from a lab.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. I mean, or a wet market.

[Tommy Chong]

That's the other possibility.

[Bill Maher]

That's the other possibility.

[Tommy Chong]

And it could be that and it could be, but I have a feeling in 50 years, people will look back and they will say, wait a minute, I wasn't around at the time. Are you telling me that the virus escaped from the one place in China that was working on the virus and people at the time were, like, debating what it would come from? I feel it will look obvious, but.

[Bill Maher]

Anyway, I don't know.

[Tommy Chong]

Chong, getting back to your story. So they wanted to get you for so many things.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

But mostly Distraction.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Do you. Are you. Do you harbor bitterness toward the Bush family? No. Oh, my gosh, no.

[Cheech Marin]

No. It was a life changer for me. No, it was. Well, I had hung with Timothy Leary and Tim.

[Tommy Chong]

I did, too. You know that chair over there? Yeah. You see that chair?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

That's a chair that Timothy Leary burned a hole in with a cigarette at a Christmas party. I had so ruined the chair, so he signed it, and now it's an art piece.

[Bill Maher]

This is great. Well, hey, works out great. He was a good buddy of ours. We hung out with him.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, I'll bet.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, we put him in.

[Tommy Chong]

Got high to the end.

[Cheech Marin]

We put him in our movie, and then we became really good friends. In fact, he was going on the road. He was like. We're like road comics. I'd see him, right? Everyone, every once in a while. I'd see him at the airport and how's the road treating you? We were like, road comics.

[Tommy Chong]

What a life he had. Like back in the day, before I knew him. And I didn't know him as well as you, but the documentary. I mean, the women and the drugs and the fighting the government and being on the lam.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. On the lamb.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, it was a spy movie.

[Cheech Marin]

Of a life escaping from the prison hand over hand on the wire. Telephone wire.

[Tommy Chong]

Doesn't somebody make a movie?

[Bill Maher]

One guy who's a Harvard professor wrote 26 books and was in 26 prisons around the world. I don't know anybody with that.

[Tommy Chong]

He was in that many prisons?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, my God.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, he was the one that convinced me that prison was kind of cool. Because he told me. He told me. He said it was the greatest time. He says, go. I'd write, then go play tennis.

[Bill Maher]

Talk to Charlie Manson in the next cell.

[Cheech Marin]

Is this just hot?

[Tommy Chong]

What do you think I'm giving you? I know. It's like taking vinyl.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Lessons from Paganini to smoke with you, but don't I. You've had it before.

[Cheech Marin]

I was worried there might be some tobacco in it.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, never.

[Cheech Marin]

No, go.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I only get pie. I only allowed. That one is from my friend Todd McCormick.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah, I know time.

[Tommy Chong]

Of course you do. A major figure in the pot movement and also did time. I only get pot from him and my other friend, Boris. They, you know, I tell them I just want something clean because, you know, you're in the pot business, right? I mean, you know, think pesticides, fungus.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

All, you know, I mean, it's probably not great for our Bodies to be putting smoke in them.

[Bill Maher]

No, probably not.

[Tommy Chong]

Right? I mean, just common sense.

[Cheech Marin]

Chinese feel it's okay.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, always with the Chinese. Kidding. 5,000 years ago, maybe that's where the virus came from.

[Cheech Marin]

5,000 years ago, they wrote in the I Ching that they used cannabis to combat cancer. Because back in the day, the emperors. The emperors paid the doctors to keep them healthy. But if they got sick and they for one reason died, they would kill the doctors.

[Tommy Chong]

You know, that's an extreme version, but that model is something that not only is discussed as something we should do.

[Cheech Marin]

But we should do.

[Tommy Chong]

We should incentivize health, keep the patient healthy. You get more money. Don't do that. And we kill you. I like it.

[Bill Maher]

It's a lot.

[Tommy Chong]

You know what? I like it.

[Bill Maher]

I like it.

[Tommy Chong]

You know that the Chinese invented the penis?

[Bill Maher]

The penis.

[Tommy Chong]

They at first used it as a cooking utensil. They did not figure out what to do with it for quite a while. But the Chinese, I'm telling you, it's always about the Chinese.

[Cheech Marin]

Because they said that. No, you know, the one boy rule, right.

[Tommy Chong]

That practically ruled their one child rule for a long time.

[Bill Maher]

Long time.

[Tommy Chong]

But you weren't actually born in China, right? Your family moved from Phi.

[Cheech Marin]

No, my dad was. My dad was born. Actually, my dad was born in Vancouver.

[Tommy Chong]

Canada, and a lot of big Asian community there.

[Cheech Marin]

But his dad was born in China and it was his dad, my grandfather, that was traditional. And he had my grandfather, quite sure he had a lot of money because he had a couple of families like my dad. It was his Canadian family that I was part of. Yeah. Because my grandfather, he was typical rich Chinese. In fact, my dad told me that they had a young girl living on the floor mat, the welcome mat. It was so poor back then, you know, that homeless would live if they found any place.

[Tommy Chong]

I don't mean to laugh. Yeah, but that's like.

[Bill Maher]

She went for P. Diddy, man.

[Tommy Chong]

But that's.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

That'S right. That's hysterical.

[Bill Maher]

Jeez. Oh, can you believe Chinese? I learned everything about Chinese from him.

[Tommy Chong]

They didn't even give him bam.

[Cheech Marin]

No, no.

[Tommy Chong]

Huh?

[Bill Maher]

Daddy, it was a flight risk.

[Cheech Marin]

I mean, no, they went torture that far.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, he offered a. Well, he seems to have done some very bad things. Yeah, well, but this happens often, Harvey Weinstein. I mean, you think about Epstein, people who are living these amazing lives a little too amazing, you know, in some way.

[Cheech Marin]

Okay, well, they're little Catholic priests in there.

[Tommy Chong]

Yes, that too. And then suddenly you're in a jail cell. I Mean.

[Bill Maher]

I asked Tommy this question. What was the worst? I mean, when you knew you were in jail and this is when that door went clang?

[Cheech Marin]

No, I heard the lock and the lock turn, click. I heard that clink.

[Tommy Chong]

You must hear guys crying.

[Cheech Marin]

And then I. Oh, there was a few. Yeah, there's guys crying. But it was a camp more than anything, you know, so it was like a lawyer's camp, you know, more lawyers.

[Tommy Chong]

You didn't emerge from this experience with the need for three fingers in your. When you have sex. Can I put it that way?

[Bill Maher]

I mean, he was, like, used to it. Let's put it that way.

[Cheech Marin]

No, I got there with the old guys. There's old guys walking around with foam cushions. And when it. When he left.

[Tommy Chong]

Foam cushions, he gave me because.

[Cheech Marin]

Because there's no soft place to sit in. Prisonido Bose Personal Plus.

[Tommy Chong]

Why am I so excited? Because of Public Rec's revolutionary daymaker pant. Here's the deal. They feel like sweats, but look and fit like tailored pants. They're stretchy and have an elastic waistband. And you can wear them anywhere. For a limited time only. Our listeners get 20% off their entire order when you use code [e-mail] that's 20% off your order at publicrec.com with promo code random. When comfort meets style, you've found Public wreck.

[Bill Maher]

All the benches are cement.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, I thought you were gonna say foam cushion because the anal sex makes your ass so sore. Well, that when you.

[Cheech Marin]

These guys, anal sex was like, funny.

[Tommy Chong]

Thing, if they just gave out the foam cushion as you entered. You got your uniform, and here's your foam cushion. You will be getting fucked in the ass. And we had a small pamphlet on how to use it.

[Bill Maher]

This prison was so kind of isolated. They didn't have any fences. And they run. All right, Run. Keep running. Go. Good luck to you.

[Cheech Marin]

Right?

[Bill Maher]

Because they knew. The guys that tried to do that, they knew where they were because they were so old. No, it's so far. There's nothing around. It's in the middle of the fucking desert, Right? I mean, middle. And you know, that's the only thing out there. They just. It was made for the Watergate guys.

[Cheech Marin]

Originally, it was a woman's prison.

[Bill Maher]

It's a women's prison.

[Cheech Marin]

And then all the Watergate. Watergate guys. Alderman Ergman, all those guys.

[Tommy Chong]

So women, white collar and potheads, they.

[Cheech Marin]

Ran out of troublesome.

[Tommy Chong]

If you're gonna go down the scale.

[Cheech Marin]

Of monster, they never had enough women. And the great thing about it is that they had their own water tower. So we had unlimited showers.

[Tommy Chong]

Unlimited showers, yeah. And that's a great perk. If you were a prisoner, you were in jail. Yeah, that's rare.

[Cheech Marin]

You can have 45 an hour shower.

[Tommy Chong]

I spent a night in the Beverly hills jail for DUI in 1992.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, man.

[Tommy Chong]

I'm not proud of. But I was barely over the limit, both with the speeding and with the drinking. But I was wearing, at the time, leopard shoes, which I feel might have influenced the officer.

[Cheech Marin]

Yes.

[Tommy Chong]

As to what this is.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

I just cannot. So, okay. But. But what was I going to say? What were we talking about?

[Cheech Marin]

How was the showers? And.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, Beverly Hills Jail. Yeah. So it is sobering. I mean, of course, this is the Beverly Hills Jail. I ordered raisin toast. No raisins. I mean, the room service was like an hour. The air conditioning made a noise. I mean, it was. I said, could I be moved to another cell? And then it was like, oh, we're doing construction. Oh, but you still put me in the jail cell. Ah, you can't get a good jail cell these days.

[Bill Maher]

Thanks.

[Tommy Chong]

And there was nothing on the spectrum.

[Bill Maher]

There was the reality of jail, too, though, man.

[Cheech Marin]

We got busted in Tampa for obscenity right after. What's his name? Jim Morris showed his wiener.

[Bill Maher]

Jim Morrison.

[Tommy Chong]

Jim Morrison.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah. Jim Morrison showed his wieners.

[Bill Maher]

Everybody got busted at this hall.

[Cheech Marin]

So they had a scam where they had put up. You had to put up $5,000 performance bond, and if you broke it, the hall owner got to keep the $5,000. And we got arrested. And so we got arrested, put in Tampa, Florida jail. And Cheech and I, we just got off stage. They took us right off stage and took us to jail. And so we still had that performer kind of vibe going.

[Bill Maher]

This is a different one from you.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah. So we're in.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, look at that.

[Cheech Marin]

We're in the cell and we're both being funny. Cheech was kind of bugging the guard. One guard. He's telling the guard, oh, jail Tendi. Jeltindi, do you have some pink toilet tissue? And there was quite a crowd of people in there for a minute. Then all of a sudden, everybody disappeared.

[Bill Maher]

Remember?

[Cheech Marin]

And the guy that Cheech was saying, oh, jail Tendi. And he points at Cheech is, you come with me to Indy. All I heard as he left was, my dad's an lapd.

[Bill Maher]

And then the steel doors closed. Dented all over. This is a different one than Tampa.

[Cheech Marin]

No, that's mine.

[Bill Maher]

I know.

[Cheech Marin]

That's me.

[Bill Maher]

I know. It is.

[Cheech Marin]

That's me, a Taft.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, a Taff.

[Cheech Marin]

That's me, a Taft.

[Tommy Chong]

So great to have those kind of memories and still have each other. Very often you have one or the other.

[Bill Maher]

It defies odds, man.

[Tommy Chong]

It really does. And also for the fans, I tell you, same thing. Of course, with bands, it's the best thing when the band still likes each other. First of all, it's so rare.

[Bill Maher]

What's rare with us, too. We hate each other and then we curious. Yeah, we like each other, but we always like each other, but we hate each other for a period of time.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, you look like you like each other tonight. And, you know, I don't know what the fights were about, but usually nothing. Whenever I've asked this with musicians, the consensus I've gotten why bands fight. Two things. You didn't like my song. You took the girl.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

That's what. That's what teams fight about. He didn't like my joke.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

With us, I wouldn't let him in the door.

[Tommy Chong]

What? What do you mean?

[Cheech Marin]

Come on, man, let me in.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, they're very.

[Cheech Marin]

Nah.

[Tommy Chong]

But I mean, when I was just thinking about getting into comedy, I mean, there was you. Steve Martin was a rock star, and you guys were rock stars. But I mean, that's rare on the very rare comedy level. But I remember playing you guys playing the Hollywood bowl and, you know, I mean, just rock star.

[Bill Maher]

We opened for the Rolling Stones one time at the Forum. That was great. Yeah, it was a Nicaraguan benefit. And we had. I think our first album was out. And we had, like.

[Cheech Marin]

Was the first on stage in la.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, in la.

[Cheech Marin]

And so we're at the Forum opening for the Stones.

[Bill Maher]

I just remembered going on and saying, what the fuck? This is the biggest stage I've ever seen in my life.

[Tommy Chong]

And that was the crowd walk.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, they were great act jammed.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. But they were okay with comedy.

[Bill Maher]

We had records at that time.

[Cheech Marin]

They were nuts. They loved it so much.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, good.

[Cheech Marin]

Because they never had, you know, they never had rock and roll.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. Sometimes rock crowds, they're not up for comedy. Like, they see comedy. I mean, trust me, I've had stuff thrown at me.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, we used to make sure that we had a folk singer open for us because the audience would hate the folk singer so much. And by the time we got out there, we were like kings. But it backfired on us. And one time, Bruce Springsteen was going to open for Cheech and Chong.

[Tommy Chong]

Really?

[Bill Maher]

And he was a folks there at.

[Cheech Marin]

The time, but he said. But he had a Band.

[Bill Maher]

Put a band together.

[Cheech Marin]

And so he called the agent and said, is it okay? Bruce Springsteen must know if it's okay if he debuts his band. And we said, yeah, of course. You know, so the. What is the E Street. What do they call?

[Tommy Chong]

Well, I think you should never fight again. Oh, you're too old. There's no girls. There's no, you know. You know. And, you know, when you have a sentimental attachment with the audience, it's just. It's a great thing to have in your pocket.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

You know, I've always been a lone wolf. Like, more than most. Like, never had a sidekick. Never got married. Loan.

[Cheech Marin]

Never got married.

[Tommy Chong]

Not to my recollection. Why you say that like it's weird?

[Bill Maher]

Well, for us, it is quite.

[Tommy Chong]

How many married.

[Bill Maher]

We've been married a bunch of times before. Yeah. Me three, him two.

[Tommy Chong]

But doesn't the wife get jealous of the partner and they feel like.

[Bill Maher]

Depends on which wife it is.

[Cheech Marin]

I did something that no comedian before me had done before.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

And no comedian has done since.

[Bill Maher]

For good reasons.

[Cheech Marin]

I put my wife in the show.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, I did.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, she was my partner.

[Tommy Chong]

Okay.

[Cheech Marin]

She was my partner for George Burns.

[Tommy Chong]

Did. It worked pretty well for him.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

See, turns out, like, it can't work.

[Cheech Marin]

And Ricky and Lucy.

[Tommy Chong]

Ricky and Lucy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

It worked. It worked for us. And then.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, it did.

[Cheech Marin]

And when Cheech came back, then when Cheech and I got back together again, you know, my wife, she read the riot act. You're not going to leave me. And.

[Tommy Chong]

And you did.

[Cheech Marin]

I said, okay, darling, you win. And so it was Cheech and Chong and Shelby for the last. Our last.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, she would open the show. She had set the. You know.

[Tommy Chong]

And you're okay with this?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, you know, that was. That part was fine. I just wanted, can't she do it? Because I'd never seen her and.

[Tommy Chong]

What. What does she do in the show?

[Bill Maher]

She opens. She opens. She had an opening act. Like a, what, 10 minutes, 15 minutes comedy?

[Cheech Marin]

No, she ended up doing 45. Yeah, 45. And when we got to Australia, the Australian promoter goes, okay, she opens, and we'll have an intermission. And then Cheech and Chong. And it was like, whoa. Okay. And then. So she used to open up and do her show. Yeah, she's got a good. She's got a good show. She's funny.

[Bill Maher]

He wrote it. You wrote it? I mean, yeah, yeah. So it's.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, I know a lot of comics would love to get that deal. Yeah. Because they're with somebody and they, you know, when you're always on the road.

[Bill Maher]

Absolutely.

[Cheech Marin]

She's too gorgeous to leave at home. And, you know, I know, you know, you leave something that valuable around, someone's going to pick up on it, you know.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, let's hope that the bond is stronger than that, Tommy.

[Bill Maher]

Let us hope.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, you know, I mean, I.

[Cheech Marin]

Just got along the road, though, you know, especially because my whole comedy career was with a partner. And so when I had to do it by myself, that's what I'm saying.

[Tommy Chong]

There's a bond between you guys that is in some ways stronger, especially when you've had multiple wives. You know, there is an inflation of the heart that goes with the more you've been with somebody. I remember having this conservative guy, used to run the Reagan library on Politically Incorrect when that show was on. And, you know, we'd like to have those kind of Republican guys on. And he was like. He was picking out, I'm sure at the time, against homosexuality, but, you know, they're poking in the wrong hole. You know, he would. It was just the Bible and Jesus and, you know, sweet guy, though, you know, like, all those Republicans are happy warriors. Just had some bad ideas. But he was very big on the fact that he said, you know, like, you liberals, you eat talking about me, a libertine, you know, you know, you multiple women. And then he said, my wife is the only woman I've ever kissed. And I was like, yeah, I wouldn't want to be you. But I do get what you're saying. Like, every time you have another love affair, you're like. It's very hard to be like, you know, you're the only one. Well, except for, you know, hey, I've always been a fan of producer Rick Rubin, and this week on his podcast, he has Shane Smith from Vice, whose new podcast I'm producing. Anyway, Rick's podcast is called Tetra Gammaton. They shot it at Rick's estate in Italy, and you can find it wherever you get your podcast. Check it out. I think you'll like it.

[Bill Maher]

I like. I like being the age we are right now. Yes, I really enjoy.

[Tommy Chong]

Even though we're old, it's so much. It's just. I remember my mother told me that once when I was younger or maybe in the 30s or something, and she said, yeah, I feel like the best decades were the 50s and 60s. I thought, what the fuck? Really? The best? Yeah, you know, and I get it now. It's like, mostly. Cause you're just not fucking stupid.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

That's the whole thing which causes you so much.

[Cheech Marin]

They haven't legalized stupidity yet.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

The same thing has come around three times now in your lifetime. What I did the last time this.

[Tommy Chong]

Thing came up, that is exactly it. Patterns, patterns.

[Bill Maher]

Same thing keeps coming up.

[Tommy Chong]

It comes up. This time I see it coming because I saw it before because boom.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, don't do that.

[Tommy Chong]

It's the quarterback who studies Fillmore week, and then when he sees that coverage, he goes, oh, I saw you do this with the Panthers.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Blink.

[Tommy Chong]

And that's when. That's the. Those are the guys who are, you know, Tom Brady, this football nerd.

[Bill Maher]

Recognize those patterns. But, you know, takes a bunch of hit in the heads, you know.

[Tommy Chong]

Do you have trouble remembering lines ever on stage? I mean, I, for years worked with a music stand that I put up there with bullet points. I could never, like, just spiel like I did when I was 25. First of all, I don't do it that often. I mean, I do it a few times a month, but that's not enough to have it. Like when I was in the clubs. We do your set six times a weekend.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

So I have that. I mean, I couldn't. I guess with a partner, you can always cue the other guy.

[Cheech Marin]

Oh.

[Tommy Chong]

Or you just know this.

[Cheech Marin]

Just make the shit up.

[Tommy Chong]

Okay. No, come on.

[Cheech Marin]

You do.

[Tommy Chong]

You don't. Come on. You don't do routines.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, yeah, I absolutely do.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah, we got routines, but we got routines about routines.

[Bill Maher]

We were, I don't know, separated for a long period and then came back.

[Cheech Marin]

On stage within 20 years.

[Bill Maher]

20 years. And we came back on stage at the La Jolla convention, walked in, didn't rehearse, didn't talk about it, and went right into the thing.

[Tommy Chong]

Of course. It's muscle memory. Are you kidding?

[Bill Maher]

I know how to do this.

[Tommy Chong]

Yes.

[Bill Maher]

Throw that one at me again. Batting cage.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. I mean, it's just something electric. That's why we love music. It is a synergy of more than one thing.

[Cheech Marin]

And there's a dance to it, by the way.

[Tommy Chong]

Yes.

[Cheech Marin]

And that dance, as you get older, exercise changes. And I found out my body wasn't responding. I could feel certain things not responding when I needed it.

[Tommy Chong]

You mean you wanted to make a move?

[Cheech Marin]

Well, I know now that getting out of a car can be a half a day workout, because they gotta work the calves, they gotta work the muscles.

[Tommy Chong]

They gotta make sure.

[Cheech Marin]

And if I go the wrong way, I'll pull a muscle or something.

[Tommy Chong]

Wow. You can't get out of the car. But you still want that hot wife with you at all times.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Seems like you can get your thing going when you want it to.

[Cheech Marin]

It's about being able to do things that seem boring. Like, I saw Tom Hanks one time. He was walking his dog near the house, and he yells in the dark. He goes, tom, Tom. Tom Hanks. He says, I see you washing dishes every night. He walks by my house and he sees me up there washing dishes.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

So.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, I thought it was some sort of an insult because.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

No, just washing dishes. And so then I realized, yeah, I do wash dishes. And you know why I wash dishes?

[Tommy Chong]

Because of that hot wife. You want to keep her on your good side.

[Cheech Marin]

That's exactly it.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. There's a new thing. What is going to make you smile?

[Cheech Marin]

What is gonna make her smile? Just looking at me is not gonna make her smile anymore.

[Tommy Chong]

You don't say you don't have a housekeeper.

[Cheech Marin]

Oh, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, yeah. But there's so many dishes. You have to additionally do dishes.

[Cheech Marin]

The housekeeper is like family. She only comes around when she's really needed, you know, but there's just us, you know, just my wife and I and, you know, and when she cooks, she's like an artist. Well, she is an artist. And so she'll use every pot in the place and every dish out of.

[Bill Maher]

The blue finds out she can paint. She can paint.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Took lessons and I know good painters when I see them. And she can paint, and it's like somebody has rhythm.

[Cheech Marin]

So she cooks much like she paints. And so when cleaning up, there's a big art to it.

[Tommy Chong]

Did you ever think you'd wind up such rich, privilegey f with your fine arts life and your international travel and your hot wives? You did.

[Bill Maher]

I always knew I was going to be successful in showing business.

[Tommy Chong]

Is that true?

[Bill Maher]

I made my first record at five years old. Five years old.

[Tommy Chong]

Explain.

[Bill Maher]

I was a little kid that could sing in tune, had a little squeaky voice, but could sing in tune and could sing in Spanish. And there was this friend of my mother's who had a little record company and used to record people in the neighborhood and then sell the records straight to disc.

[Cheech Marin]

So you still got that record?

[Bill Maher]

No, I was like, I was five.

[Cheech Marin]

That would be worth hearing. I want to hear that.

[Bill Maher]

I was five. And so. And I saw the reaction that it caused, and people would. And then I said, right from the very beginning, that's what I want to do. I want to create that energy. I want to get, you know, and.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, I mean, I knew I wanted to be a comedian when I was less than 10.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

So that's a great advantage in life when you know what you want to do. Because a lot of kids get to be 22 and they're like talented at some. But they. But what do I do? Yeah, you know, and they. And this generation is not big on like putting in the time. Yeah, they kind of want, you know.

[Bill Maher]

But they know how to do a lot of things.

[Tommy Chong]

They have talent and they're not stupid. They're just ignorant because they don't teach them anything. So they don't know things. They don't know anything. And they have the arrogance of thinking they know everything. But all kids think that. I mean that's every generation to think that you know everything. I mean, again, that's why somehow we're better now, we're better with being alive now than we were plainly when we were. It was so much easier when you're younger because you're health wise, not on a short leash. You know what I mean by a short leash?

[Cheech Marin]

Whether we wanted or not, we got control over our urges.

[Tommy Chong]

No, our urges got control over us. I would not have chosen not to be able to drink like I used to. I enjoyed it.

[Bill Maher]

Really?

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

I never enjoyed drinking.

[Tommy Chong]

Really.

[Bill Maher]

Never?

[Tommy Chong]

Not even with pot?

[Bill Maher]

No. I would have social drinks, you know, have a beer.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah, that's it.

[Tommy Chong]

I always thought the combination there was something magical. That was one plus one equals three with liquor in pot.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, really?

[Tommy Chong]

Possibly why I'm smoking liquor and drinking pot right now.

[Bill Maher]

But I like your den here, man. This is cool.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, clever anthem is cool. I wish you could hear some night and you could be when we're not taping because it's so much better with the music on. It's a place that needs to have music. It's a real pool table, a little club.

[Cheech Marin]

I like your Canadian pool table.

[Tommy Chong]

Why? Because it's red, it's big. Oh, it's bigger than a normal. Really?

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah. No, that's. When you play pool in Canada you get really good because the pockets are small like these compared to the nine hole pool.

[Tommy Chong]

And why were you in Canada so much, comrade? Were you fleeing?

[Cheech Marin]

I'm Canadian.

[Tommy Chong]

The law.

[Cheech Marin]

I'm Canadian.

[Tommy Chong]

I know.

[Cheech Marin]

Born in Edmonton and raised in Calgary. I came down to the states in my 30s actually. Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

For the first time ever.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Canadians have an amazing roster of talent, especially in comedy because they are simultaneously part of the United States. You can't not be. In many ways, Canada is a big blue State to the north. Whenever they do ticket sales for movies, for example, it's always. And the North American market, you know, it's not just America, it's so, you know, they're performers like you. They know it so intimately that they are of it, but they're also a little detached. They're not. They're Americans. But, no, not really. Not quite and not at the end of the day.

[Bill Maher]

They have their own strains, their own ethnic and Indian strains, but they can.

[Tommy Chong]

Satirize this country so well because of that, I feel when you think of.

[Bill Maher]

All the people, all the guys in.

[Cheech Marin]

Chicago being Canadian, I can tell you exactly. Canadians believe what they hear. They believe what they see. You know, they really do. You know, they're not. They have no reason to be skeptical, you know. And so they like, for instance, playing guitar. That's my thing was guitar. And we listened to the records, the great guitarist in the records, and fuck, how did they play like that, you know? And so then we would practice and practice, but then we find out that a lot of it was tricks, you know, how to make a guitar sound crazy like that.

[Tommy Chong]

It's all tricks, isn't it? I mean, tricks any boy can do. Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

What's your days like? Hey, what do you. What do you. Are you get up early? Do you.

[Bill Maher]

Depends on where I am and what I'm doing, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Really?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, just.

[Tommy Chong]

You can get up at different times. I can never.

[Bill Maher]

Where I'm working. I just came back from Mexico City. I did a picture there for a week and worked two days and saw everything. My Russian wife wanted to see about Mexico.

[Tommy Chong]

Your wife is Russian?

[Bill Maher]

Russian. From St. Petersburg.

[Cheech Marin]

She's a Russian tour guide.

[Tommy Chong]

You guys are bad. They're just bad boys.

[Bill Maher]

It's russiangirls.com, i'll turn you onto the site. You get the weekend package.

[Tommy Chong]

Did you get married? What year did you get married to this woman?

[Bill Maher]

20 years ago.

[Tommy Chong]

20 years ago?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. It's 1920. Right around there.

[Tommy Chong]

Right around there, yeah. You should know this.

[Bill Maher]

Well, it was romantic. It was a wavering green light.

[Tommy Chong]

No, no. I mean, there's some things you can be fuzzy on the timeline, but not your anniversary. You're supposed to have that down.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. She doesn't care.

[Tommy Chong]

She doesn't care. That's the best. That's the best. Someone who doesn't pressure you, huh? Someone who doesn't pressure you.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Is the best. Kind of.

[Cheech Marin]

She's stronger than cheese.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, absolutely.

[Cheech Marin]

She can carry more rocks.

[Bill Maher]

Absolutely. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Hey, if it's important to the woman to think she's stronger than you. Go ahead, Wonder Woman. I can give a fuck. I'm not even looking to be the strongest. I'm just looking to be happy, you know, so you could be strong or whatever. I could be, you know, just. Just don't be a nudge. As my mother would say, don't be a nudge.

[Bill Maher]

No, this is great, girl.

[Tommy Chong]

That's great. Well, I'm very happy for both of you.

[Bill Maher]

Classical pianist.

[Tommy Chong]

A pianist.

[Bill Maher]

A concert pianist.

[Tommy Chong]

A pianist, A pianist.

[Bill Maher]

Well, there's that. No, she just got her doctorate from USC in piano performance and, you know, well, 20 years of scales.

[Cheech Marin]

She plays Cheech like a harp.

[Bill Maher]

Absolutely.

[Tommy Chong]

Do the four of you go out together like the Mertzes and the Ricardos?

[Bill Maher]

Not very often we meet. No.

[Cheech Marin]

We have common friends if we ever shoot a movie.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, right.

[Cheech Marin]

Been together. When we shot that last documentary, we had a little time in the desert.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

Little town.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

Not really.

[Bill Maher]

We see each other.

[Cheech Marin]

He's got his grandpa life. I've got my grandpa life.

[Tommy Chong]

You have grandkids?

[Bill Maher]

I do.

[Tommy Chong]

You both do.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

And what do they know of your lurid past?

[Bill Maher]

Oh, we don't give a shit. No.

[Tommy Chong]

But are they curious? Do they know. Do they see on YouTube.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, you can see when they hit that. That realization button, who their grandfather is. You know, I watched my. My grandsons, you know, grow up. At first, you know, I'm just this guy. And then after a while, I was like, oh, he's that guy. And then, you know, Jack and that. But the kids. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, they grand.

[Bill Maher]

Is going to be 17. Who? My oldest grandkid. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

But I'm curious as to, like, what these kids think. Do they. You feel like they fully appreciate what you did?

[Bill Maher]

I don't know yet. I'm watching it unfold.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

You know, you could tell it at what. At different stages. My ark has discovered us, heard the records and how they relate and what they related to in the records. And that was an interesting process, you know, because the things they didn't understand, they didn't understand, but the things they thought were funny, they laughed at, you know, so.

[Tommy Chong]

But do they have an appreciation of, like, how big you were? No, they don't.

[Bill Maher]

No.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. I guess you had to live through it.

[Bill Maher]

No.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah. I've always been Grandpa.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. I hear people often, celebrities often say that, like, yeah, I'm just this guy. I'm like, then why'd you become a celebrity?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

I think you should use that to pull rank on these Kids.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

And you know, enjoy your. Leave your grandpa some respect.

[Cheech Marin]

Kids are like little helpers, you know?

[Tommy Chong]

Helpers usually.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah. Like electric carts.

[Tommy Chong]

Wow.

[Cheech Marin]

You know, they lead you around. But my kids, I couldn't. There's not a iPhone or iPad or computer in my house that my kids don't know. Have to show me how to use it, you know, or even how to find it.

[Tommy Chong]

Even how to find it. Oh yeah, that's what I did. I get it. I mean I'm not native to this stuff either. And everything that's technological, I feel like it's like doing something left handed.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, I agree.

[Tommy Chong]

Can I do it? Yeah, I guess. Badly.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

And I just. My response to that was always, yeah, but if I got richer at what I am good at.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, that's exactly the.

[Tommy Chong]

Somebody else didn't do that.

[Bill Maher]

Exactly what I.

[Tommy Chong]

But it's not a good way to be because what if like there's a catastrophe and we're all on our own?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. I mean, I'd die in the woods, man.

[Tommy Chong]

I would too.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. I would just like to like.

[Tommy Chong]

But like for lack of PayPal, I'd be like just. Just set upon by feral wolves. Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Or younger I could, but not now.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

Survival in the woods. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, it's also. But it's this sort of computer, Internet, social media, iPhone. Divide that if you came along long enough before that was a thing which we all did.

[Bill Maher]

And you just don't speak that language.

[Tommy Chong]

You just don't. I mean some people do. I certainly know people our age who loved it and adapted to it. Yeah, yeah, I love it. But I. But it's just so hard to.

[Bill Maher]

I don't have enough time to learn that language.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

You know, when I could, I want.

[Tommy Chong]

To and I've tried. I'm putting.

[Bill Maher]

I'm rich enough and I can hire somebody to speak that language for me.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, what it is is like I'll learn something but then I won't use it because I don't need it. Because a lot of this shit is.

[Bill Maher]

Like you don't need it to begin with.

[Tommy Chong]

Like I don't yelp. Like the last thing in the world I'm going to do is like publicly criticize a restaurant. If I didn't have a good time there, I won't come back. But like I want everybody, you know that my soup was cold.

[Cheech Marin]

What the fuck do you watch TikTok?

[Tommy Chong]

Do I watch TikTok? Do I watch it? First of all, grandpa, we don't say watch TikTok. I think I Think we say there's.

[Cheech Marin]

A TikTok thing where you have to, you know, brush up for the next one and then you see that. And then this one.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, I've seen TikTok. Yes, but I'm afraid of TikTok. I feel like I don't want it on my phone. You know?

[Cheech Marin]

Why?

[Tommy Chong]

China. Fucking China is TikTok. Am I wrong?

[Cheech Marin]

Of course.

[Tommy Chong]

Okay.

[Cheech Marin]

But so is AI.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, AI is US too. Yeah, TikTok is China. It's a Chinese owned company. And I mean, aren't they making them sell it?

[Cheech Marin]

They're making a lot of money.

[Tommy Chong]

They're making a lot of money. And look, it's not like American kids need help in becoming stupider. Yeah, they're doing fine on their own, but it's not in China's interest to help them not be stupid. And they're not helping. Although I must say, the videos that you see of Trump saying, they're killing the dogs, they're coming in, they're killing all the dogs, they're killing the cats. And then people put them with pictures of their pets going. It was the funniest thing I saw all year.

[Cheech Marin]

I've been enjoying the Trump Follies, you know, the comedians and all the material that Trump's generated.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, he's been.

[Cheech Marin]

He's going to be. But there should be a monument made for Trump. Like, if there is really God and justice in this world.

[Tommy Chong]

There's not.

[Cheech Marin]

Trump will be sentenced to Guantanamo for life. But there they'll build the biggest sand trap. Golf.

[Tommy Chong]

When you go to Guantanamo, that's all he's got. He's got Ducey sand traps, sir. When you go to Guantanamo, they give you one of those ass pillows because.

[Cheech Marin]

No one gives them to you. These guys, you have to earn it.

[Tommy Chong]

Nobody gives you an ass pillow in this world. Oh, my friend.

[Cheech Marin]

You have to find a way to make them. You do buy them.

[Tommy Chong]

I've always said that.

[Cheech Marin]

No.

[Bill Maher]

Yes.

[Tommy Chong]

Nobody gives.

[Cheech Marin]

Prison is a whole different life. There.

[Tommy Chong]

Give you an ass pill. And they shouldn't. And they should, because that's what makes an ass pillow valuable to you and meaningful.

[Bill Maher]

See, because people don't know about it.

[Tommy Chong]

No. I see these people begging for ass pillows on the street. I'm like, you know what? Yeah. Maybe you have something that prevented you from being successful. I used to have.

[Bill Maher]

You could be the new ass pillow guy. The new pillow guy.

[Tommy Chong]

I had this girlfriend once, like, the pillow.

[Bill Maher]

The other pillow guy.

[Tommy Chong]

And when we were, like walking on the street in New York. She'd see some guy was like begging, like literally on the sidewalk, and she'd say, why don't you give me some money? I mean, like, zero empathy. Yeah, because she had a crazy mother and kind of a rough childhood. So, you know.

[Cheech Marin]

Who is this?

[Tommy Chong]

Some girlfriend I had a million years ago. Would see a beggar in the street. And that was her response. Why don't you give me some money? I'll never forget it too. I'm like, what the fuck? You psycho. And I'm still fucking you. Yes, because you're hot. So that was, you know, again, when.

[Cheech Marin]

We first went to Club 54, I got so hung up.

[Tommy Chong]

Studio 54.

[Cheech Marin]

Studio 54 or in New York.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

I got so hung up watching this guy scam people on the street.

[Tommy Chong]

Which guy?

[Cheech Marin]

The beggar. Oh, they worked in pairs.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, is that right?

[Cheech Marin]

One guy would be obnoxious and just, you know, just scare the shit out of everybody. And then his buddy would come along and say, hey, get out of here, man. Come on and make him bleed. And apologize to everybody. Apologize to all the people.

[Tommy Chong]

That good bum, bad bum. Exactly. Jesus. Yeah, I'm so naive. I never once even thought that.

[Cheech Marin]

What's up?

[Tommy Chong]

You mean the bums are fake? What's this world coming?

[Cheech Marin]

Jamaica for sure.

[Bill Maher]

Wow.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, well, Jamaica in Jamaica.

[Cheech Marin]

Ocho Rios and resort there. And of course the hotel said, you know, that's something Mountain. I forget. Anyway, Stearman. Stearman. Don't go to Stearman.

[Tommy Chong]

Why?

[Cheech Marin]

That's where all the locals hang out at night. So that's the first place I went to. Of course, that's where the fun is now when you go to Stearman, it's a club, you know, they had candlelight and Vada Grand. Smoked all over the place.

[Bill Maher]

That makes a club.

[Cheech Marin]

And then you would a lot of good dancing and a lot of the people that were formerly during the day, begging on the beach, you know, with the fucked up leg or something. Now they're dancing. They're dancing. They got their teeth in.

[Tommy Chong]

I gotta say, they're doing. That is cheeky to be. To be using your thing as a bad leg. Yeah, definitely. To explain that one away in court. Yeah, yeah, no, that.

[Cheech Marin]

That was Stearman.

[Tommy Chong]

That's hysterical. What's your favorite place that you went ever? Yeah, like your favorite one place in the world. So you guys are world travelers in a way. I really have never been. I toured Europe once, like four cities doing stand up. It was fine, but it wasn't for me. I'm An American, you know, Anyway, I know the feeling. Is there a, like, Amsterdam or, I don't know, Toronto or. You know, if you ask the Rolling Stones, I'm sure they would be all have an opinion.

[Cheech Marin]

They all love New York. All the Stones and the Beatles. Yeah, they all love New York.

[Bill Maher]

I just came back from Mexico City. Man, that city's popping.

[Tommy Chong]

Where?

[Bill Maher]

Mexico City. Yeah, I mean, that's right. Yeah. It's good there, right? Yeah. But I don't know, I'd kind of like to end up. I like Costa Rica a lot. I've gone there a lot in my life over a period of time. The city San Jose. I haven't. No. I always spend time out at the beach at Quepos. And I've been going there for years.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And I think I might.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, that's a little off the beaten path. I mean, like, cities. Oh, cities, yeah. Like, what city did you vibe with? I always felt like I either vibed with the city or I didn't.

[Bill Maher]

Amsterdam. Yeah, Amsterdam.

[Tommy Chong]

I have to say, maybe I just had the wrong guides, but, like. Was polite but not warm to me.

[Bill Maher]

No.

[Tommy Chong]

Maybe you had a different experience.

[Cheech Marin]

I was out of the step too, you know, when they heard we were coming, you know, all the stoners, you.

[Tommy Chong]

Guys must be in.

[Cheech Marin]

Gods, the stoners, you know, they got together and they took me out for a night out.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

And a half hour later, they had to drag me back.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Cheech Marin]

I could not hang with them at all.

[Bill Maher]

Paris is. We both lived in Paris for a long time. Time.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And I like. I like that city. It's cold at first, but when you find out where to go and speak.

[Cheech Marin]

To what you're doing, you know, we were doing a movie there, so it was quite nice. You know, Paris could be nice.

[Bill Maher]

We both stayed there for like. You were there, what, four years?

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. I mean, there's no city like it in the world.

[Bill Maher]

Huh?

[Tommy Chong]

Paris.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

It's come because it's not just the economic capital, like New York.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, you got choices.

[Tommy Chong]

It's also the political capital, like Washington. It's like New York and Washington as one. Plus it's kind of the capital of Europe.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, Berlin might argue in some ways, but Paris, you know.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, each capital.

[Tommy Chong]

But I hate the food. I can't stand the food.

[Bill Maher]

Really.

[Tommy Chong]

I cannot have it. Yeah. It's like I have to find like the worst sort of like deli to go in to get like a. Just go to a sub, eat there, survive on, because I cannot stand the food. It's horrible. And it has the reputation.

[Cheech Marin]

Were you from New Jersey? Was Italian food you got used to.

[Tommy Chong]

I just like regular food. Not like. Just like. Not this. There was. I mean, I'm telling you, the last time I was there and I was not eating badly, I was with people who knew the city and were rich and it was. You know, we ate at fine places and we ate at the neighborhood place that was supposed to be even better. I fucking hated it all. I filled up on bread and something I had the entire time. I'm telling you, you are with meat. But the meat was always super tough. The first time I was like, oh, this must be a bad batch. No, next time. That's how they like it. They eat it like that. It's. It's terrible.

[Bill Maher]

It's an acquired city.

[Tommy Chong]

It's terrible.

[Bill Maher]

I will.

[Tommy Chong]

And everybody else was, like, loving it. And, well, this stinky shit.

[Bill Maher]

They have good food there.

[Cheech Marin]

You weren't stoned then, I guess, you.

[Tommy Chong]

Know, this is 2015. I'm trying to think. I don't think. I think I would be too paranoid. I know I'm too paranoid to bring pot to. Oh, I may have. We went to Amsterdam first. That's probably why the idea. It was written that way, now that I think about it. We went to Amsterdam first for a reason. Okay.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Amsterdam was always like a safe port. It was Casablanca.

[Bill Maher]

Well, we worked there. We made a movie there. So we were there for a while, you know, and got intertwined with the locals.

[Cheech Marin]

We started the first pot cafe in Amsterdam with our movie On a Barge.

[Tommy Chong]

I remember being in a restaurant when I was first there, and I thought, oh, we'll smoke. And then they were like, no, we don't smoke everywhere here. You know, like, we're just adult about it.

[Bill Maher]

We're not French.

[Tommy Chong]

It wouldn't be like. It just wouldn't be cool to. You could legally smoke here in the restaurant. It just wouldn't be cool. These, they were cool that way.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

You know, they were a cohesive society.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Yeah, they were.

[Tommy Chong]

And I mean, where are they now?

[Cheech Marin]

Do you know?

[Tommy Chong]

Where are they now? The ducks, where are they now?

[Cheech Marin]

Because I heard that.

[Tommy Chong]

Picking on the Brady Bunch, the Dutch. Where are they now?

[Cheech Marin]

I heard they were going trumpy. They were headed in the trump direction.

[Tommy Chong]

First of all, it's a fair question, because they once almost stopped the world economy with the tulip market, right?

[Bill Maher]

Yes.

[Tommy Chong]

They were the big swinging dick in the explorer's age.

[Bill Maher]

Navigators, boy.

[Tommy Chong]

Exactly. Well said.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

They're natural yeah, there was, you know, New York City is Stuyvesantown. Peter Stuyvesant was Dutch. They bought it from the.

[Bill Maher]

And then all those islands in between the Hudson River.

[Tommy Chong]

So the Dutch, where are they? Well, they were always a very free, liberal society. They do have a large Muslim minority, and there is a clash of cultures there. And it could best, I think, be summed up as, you know, are you so tolerant that you're willing to tolerate intolerance? That's the issue.

[Bill Maher]

Wow.

[Tommy Chong]

So because. Wow. Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

It's your worst nightmare.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, That's Indonesia.

[Tommy Chong]

So this guy, Gert Wilders, I interviewed him in Religilist when we filmed there in 2006. He was a Dutch politician on the R. I think he's the head dude now. And people call him a racist and this and that. I don't see it that way. I don't know. It was a long time ago, and I don't keep up with Dutch politics. But my memory is, we were more on the same page of like, should there be any sort of prejudice against Islamic people? Of course not. But there are beliefs that are not liberal, and they don't, you know, you can't kill cartoonists. You can't. You can't do shit like that. They had a Dutch artist, Theo van Gogh made a movie about Muhammad. He got stabbed on the sidewalk. So there's a lot of controversy there of, like, you know, we want to be tolerant to everybody, but not if your beliefs themselves are intolerant.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

Not if you're still at war, because that's really what. They're still at war.

[Tommy Chong]

Who's still at war?

[Cheech Marin]

The Muslims.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. There has been a war between Islam and the west for a very long, starting with the Middle Ages, the Crusades. I mean, it is.

[Cheech Marin]

They're still there.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, it's a similar thing. I mean, they fought over Jerusalem a lot.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah, they're still fighting.

[Tommy Chong]

Did you ever see that movie? It's a Ridley Scott movie like Days of Heaven, I think it's called. It's about this Jerusalem and the siege of it in 1187 by the Muslim guy who finally took it over.

[Bill Maher]

Saludin.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, it's such a great movie. It's called Days of Heaven.

[Bill Maher]

Days of Heaven? Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

You saw it?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, I did.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

I remember who was in it. Movie star wise.

[Tommy Chong]

You watch movies at the end of the day.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, well, movies. You watch movies. You go to movies.

[Cheech Marin]

Go.

[Bill Maher]

You know, those things that come.

[Cheech Marin]

Who wants to know?

[Tommy Chong]

I want to know. I want to know what you do Right before you go to sleep.

[Cheech Marin]

My wife takes me to movies. She takes the old guy out for an airing.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, don't look at it that way.

[Bill Maher]

You know, but takes him out for.

[Cheech Marin]

An airing in the sun.

[Tommy Chong]

I bet you she has to fight off the bitches trying to get at you with her hand back. Come on.

[Cheech Marin]

It's nice when that does happen. Everyone's around. Oh, look who.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, my God.

[Cheech Marin]

You kind of check her out, Take a look at her.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. I hate to tell you, they thought you were Kenny Rogers.

[Cheech Marin]

No, no, I'm. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[Tommy Chong]

That's what people say. Yeah. You're iconic. Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

You gotta keep happy, you know, staying happy.

[Tommy Chong]

That's.

[Cheech Marin]

There's an art to it. And I realize because I'm a comedian, I can entertain the fuck out of myself. And I'd been doing a good job. My son had me taken off Twitter because I was getting too many enemies with the Trumpies. It was getting starting to get heckled at the shows.

[Tommy Chong]

Really.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah. So it was time to go. Okay, you got it. It's yours for a while.

[Bill Maher]

I don't engage with social media at all. I have other people that do for me, you know, when we have business or business together. But as a person.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Zip.

[Tommy Chong]

First of all, it's back to the thing that we are just not often capable.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Of conjuring it up in the easy way. That it. But hey, check out this TikTok. And I can't. Show it to me. Send it to me.

[Bill Maher]

I'd rather practice ukulele, man. I mean, you really do, you know, if I'm going to spend. What am I going to spend time on, you know?

[Tommy Chong]

Well, look, I mean, I certainly have scrolled through enough TikToks and Instagrams to know that they can. I mean, this is what's so seductive about it, is we're not stupid people. No, a lot of people are not stupid people. I have to say, if I just didn't have a discipline in me that I think comes from being in this generation. It is interesting. You can show me one fucking amazing thing after another in a way that's so evil that you're like getting right to that. Oh, first, here's a guy who's surfing the highest wave ever and then they blowjob and then, you know, but it's just, yes, you can go bing, bing, bing to my pleasures. And oh, my God, this a dog doing an amazing thing. And I love dogs. You can do that. So I could see non stop, just non stop. You have to have something in you that goes, I got something better to do, or I want to make something better in my life or whatever. You got to really pull yourself away. And a lot of people don't see.

[Cheech Marin]

Where aging comes in.

[Tommy Chong]

Yes. No, it's.

[Cheech Marin]

Your body just automatically shuts down, slows down. The shit you used to be able to do, you can't do anymore.

[Tommy Chong]

And there's just that the part of the brain that is supposedly the captain sometimes does his job and says, stop looking at this stupid shit. As much as you could keep going. Because I'm saying now you should do this other thing. Which, look, it's not gonna be that much worse and it's gonna be productive and you need to do it for tomorrow or whatever the fuck.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. And I just. It's like heroin. And I just never was attracted. And I'm still not attracted to it.

[Tommy Chong]

And then some people. I mean, I'm sure you know Woody Harrelson.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

He does not have a cell phone. And the reason is because he found it too addictive, not because he hated it.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, okay. Yeah, I don't engage with it at all. I mean, I have accounts book.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, the cell phone. Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

I don't know any social media.

[Tommy Chong]

But you must use it for.

[Cheech Marin]

You gotta turn it on.

[Bill Maher]

Huh?

[Cheech Marin]

You gotta turn it on.

[Bill Maher]

No, I don't.

[Tommy Chong]

You don't text?

[Bill Maher]

I do text.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, yes.

[Bill Maher]

But only people I know.

[Tommy Chong]

Right. Well, who. Strangers.

[Bill Maher]

I get texts from strangers all the time.

[Tommy Chong]

Who's selling cryptocurrency? No, no, of course. People, you know, But I mean, you have to admit, like, some of these things that came along well after were like, of the age to. Some of them did turn out to be awesome. Like texting. I mean, I wish we had texting. It's so easy and it takes care. Or email anything where you just don't have to actually make a call or a visit, you know? Cause lots of stuff in life doesn't require that. It just requires. It's when people use texting to tell you their life story. That's when it's like. No, no, no. It's just to be like, I'll be 10 minutes late, or I'm up here on the Empire State Building, you know, they could. We never make that movie where they. What movie is that? Where they're supposed to meet at the Empire State Building and they miss each other. Now. They would just. I'm in the lobby. What are you doing, muck? But I mean, that was awesome. In emails, when I think about Having to, like, leave messages.

[Bill Maher]

No, I like the technology. I mean, I like. Exactly. For what. Those things that you said. It does. I just don't want to have to. To learn another language.

[Tommy Chong]

No.

[Bill Maher]

Right now is like, enough. My wife learned Spanish in three months. Reads, it writes, it speaks. It speaks English, Russian, Spanish, French, Italian.

[Tommy Chong]

But I'm assuming your wives are quite a bit younger than you.

[Cheech Marin]

His wife is KGB and younger kgb.

[Bill Maher]

She was.

[Tommy Chong]

What does that mean? She was junior kgb. Oh, she really was.

[Bill Maher]

No.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, are you sure?

[Bill Maher]

Well, we're not sure. What's your name? Come on.

[Cheech Marin]

Concert pianist, so.

[Tommy Chong]

I'm sure she's awesome. But I must admit, I am wary of Russians. Oh, okay. Can I just put it on the table? I am wary of Russians. I don't think it's their fault.

[Bill Maher]

No.

[Tommy Chong]

But I think Communism.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Was such a horrible system, especially psychologically, that it made the Russian people kind of a abused child. That is still in. And, you know, Putin, it's not like it got a lot better.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Except he calmed the waters for a long time for them. They weren't in a war for a long time, and they had always been in wars.

[Tommy Chong]

Putin, Putin.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

They're in one now.

[Bill Maher]

Well, they're. Yeah. There's no resurgence at the end of his life, he wants you know, to kind of revive the kingdom.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And they all go through that period. You know, look at Bush, look at Trump, and all those guys are, you know, the lion and winner right now is what we're seeing, but a crazy version of it. It's like.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, but he's not. Trump ain't trying to invade anybody.

[Bill Maher]

I'll give him a chance.

[Tommy Chong]

We did. He was president for four years. I mean, nobody hates Trump more than me, but he didn't. You know, his instinct is the opposite. He wants to get out of Ukraine. He wants to just give it to Putin.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

You know, his big secret plan. Yeah, my secret plan. We give up. Yeah. My plan to end the war. We give up. Okay.

[Bill Maher]

You know, that's what his plan is.

[Cheech Marin]

I've been enjoying the Trump. Oh, my God. Eating. They're eating your dog.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, it's.

[Bill Maher]

It was like watching a marlin about to take that bait. You know, he's going to a big, big mackerel out there, you know, half a mackerel.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, I said on my show Friday, I think he's toast. I'm putting down my marker that he's going to lose this election. I've always been a pessimist about him.

[Cheech Marin]

This is the first time he knows he's going to lose, but with his luck, he could win.

[Tommy Chong]

I don't think he will. I think it'll be tied, as the polls always are on election day. The American people just love to play a game of chicken, and they always will. But they're like people who shop for.

[Cheech Marin]

You, sell papers or newspapers or Internet or something. You got breaking news.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Cheech Marin]

And that's what it is, breaking news.

[Tommy Chong]

But I think at the last minute, when people go into the booth, this time.

[Cheech Marin]

They'Ll do it.

[Bill Maher]

Right.

[Tommy Chong]

They just have had enough.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, I think so, too.

[Tommy Chong]

It's as.

[Bill Maher]

I mean, he has a strong base, but.

[Tommy Chong]

No, they're very strong. And it's not going to be a walk, but at the end of the day, it'll be just enough. That's the marker.

[Bill Maher]

I don't know. I think they're going to give people the loopholes they haven't had before.

[Cheech Marin]

Icing will be when he gets sentenced.

[Tommy Chong]

There's no sentencings anymore. Oh, yeah, he does get sentenced, right?

[Cheech Marin]

Yes, he does.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, right. In the hush money one, he does. All right. Well, you know, I don't want to base my happiness based on how unhappy he is.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

I feel like, you know, out of my life.

[Cheech Marin]

You gotta accept him for what he was, you know, he was.

[Tommy Chong]

I don't accept him. I completely don't accept him. But I also don't accept letting his psyche, like, control my psyche.

[Cheech Marin]

Think what he did. He did things that no one else. No one could do.

[Tommy Chong]

Yes, true. Oh, yes. Mostly for the worse.

[Cheech Marin]

No one could do. No, the best. The best. He got Joe Biden elected. No one else could have done that.

[Tommy Chong]

That's funny. That's not a compliment to Joe Biden. But, I mean, I'm not going to argue with it either. It's true.

[Cheech Marin]

You're right. Elected, too. He'll be responsible for the first black woman president of America, thanks to Donald Trump.

[Tommy Chong]

You're right.

[Cheech Marin]

That's it. And we'll owe it all to him.

[Tommy Chong]

I sense you don't like him. Well, I don't like him either, and I don't care who knows it.

[Bill Maher]

I don't like him in that.

[Tommy Chong]

I think he's kind of a buffoon, if I'm going to be completely honest.

[Cheech Marin]

Comedy.

[Tommy Chong]

God, he's a comedy. Yeah. Nobody ever provided more material because unlike other presidents who had one or two things about them that were obviously funny, you know, Bush was stupid and Clinton was horny. Like, this guy's everything. He's both stupid and crazy and Horny and fat everything. And wants to fuck his daughter. He looks like the devil, right? And has this preposterous turkey sandwich on his head. And it's his real hair. That's even worse, is that it's not a wig. It would somehow be better, don't you think?

[Bill Maher]

He stinks. He stinks.

[Tommy Chong]

He's putrid.

[Cheech Marin]

This is.

[Bill Maher]

This is his latest theory. Your latest story.

[Cheech Marin]

No, no. It's been proven. They got energy, they got the smell.

[Tommy Chong]

What?

[Cheech Marin]

Proven.

[Tommy Chong]

He's staying, Trump. Yeah, like physics. Like, physically.

[Cheech Marin]

He has to wear diapers. He shits himself.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, come on.

[Bill Maher]

Who?

[Tommy Chong]

Who. Where are you getting this?

[Cheech Marin]

On the Internet.

[Tommy Chong]

On the Internet. You sound like them. This is my problem. In America, everybody's nuts. Oh, Christ. On the Internet. Well, that wraps that up. I'm Ed Murray.

[Bill Maher]

You never heard a book.

[Cheech Marin]

You never heard that before? Never heard that before, huh?

[Tommy Chong]

That he. That. I heard it about Elvis.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

No, no, but Trump.

[Bill Maher]

Really?

[Cheech Marin]

Wearing diapers.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, I. You know, I. I mean, it's plausible.

[Cheech Marin]

Stinks. Stinks.

[Bill Maher]

Plausible. We're about this exact same age, me and Trump.

[Tommy Chong]

78.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

You must be proud.

[Bill Maher]

Use it as a marker there.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, I think you're doing great for 78. Well, I'm 68.

[Bill Maher]

68.

[Tommy Chong]

60.

[Bill Maher]

Let.

[Cheech Marin]

You're a youngster then, eh?

[Tommy Chong]

No, it's also relative. I remember When I was 37, I had been in a relationship for five years. Oh, sorry.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Let me talk. And five years, a very significant relationship. Just at the age you would get married if you were, like, the kind of person who could, which apparently I wasn't. And I thought, oh, my God, 37. I. What woman's going to go out with me now?

[Bill Maher]

Oh, really?

[Tommy Chong]

I thought it was too old. Just, like, wasn't even mature yet. I wasn't even. And then I remember going out with this girl. I was 42, she was 28. And I remember she. I asked her once, like, what do you think the perfect age for a man is? And she said, like, early 50s. Like what early 50s is? And now I get it. It's like, yeah, women know more than anybody, you know, they don't want to put up with stupid. They'll put up with so much, like, how we look, because we're just better to be around and not stupid and not possessive and, you know, I feel like so much of the success of a relationship is just letting the person be who they are. For fuck's sake.

[Bill Maher]

And loving it.

[Tommy Chong]

What?

[Cheech Marin]

And loving it.

[Tommy Chong]

And loving. Yes, of course.

[Cheech Marin]

And loving it.

[Tommy Chong]

Okay, we get It. You're a marvel, man. Well, the grandkids, when they come, everybody gets along.

[Bill Maher]

Actually, I'm going. They all live in Colorado.

[Tommy Chong]

They're all the many baby mamas. It's not a whole mishigos.

[Bill Maher]

No, but my daughter, my oldest.

[Tommy Chong]

You have different kids from different ladies.

[Bill Maher]

Yes.

[Tommy Chong]

Okay.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. But that's not the issue. But my oldest daughter, Carmen, grew up skiing, and she went to college on a ski scholarship. And so that's what her perfect life was, to live in the ski town. And all her kids grew up in that, you know, and that's what she's doing right now. And they're doing very well. And we're going there for the. For Thanksgiving. We haven't seen them in a little while, so.

[Tommy Chong]

He's such a man of the people. With his daughter in the ski town, I.

[Bill Maher]

You know, that's what she wanted. Well, she grew up in a ski town.

[Tommy Chong]

No, I think that's. That's what's so great about America is that, you know, do we have our problems. Yes. But really, anybody can be anywhere. Yeah, it didn't. It wasn't always, so.

[Bill Maher]

No.

[Tommy Chong]

And there are still issues, but anybody can be anywhere.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. And it's a big country.

[Tommy Chong]

It's a big country. And it's not as hickey as it used to be. I was just writing something about how country music. I used to hate it, really. For a good reason. It sucked, and now. It doesn't suck. Yeah, it doesn't suck. It's like country music is like The Eagles in 1972.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Cheech Marin]

Yep.

[Tommy Chong]

Basically, we loved.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

They had a banjo for a while.

[Cheech Marin]

Right.

[Tommy Chong]

Remember Bernie Ludden?

[Bill Maher]

Uh huh.

[Tommy Chong]

He must have hung out with all those.

[Bill Maher]

The rock stars. Yeah, we all came out of the Troubadour on that side.

[Tommy Chong]

Like, what musicians were you paddling around with? Like, in that era when you guys were stars and they were stars.

[Bill Maher]

I was friends with Jim Croce and he.

[Tommy Chong]

Jim Croce?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, I thought he was great, but I was hoping he'd say, like, Led Zeppelin. Oh, no, I'm fucking.

[Bill Maher]

They were fans and different guys hung out, but he reached out because we had a common agent or something.

[Tommy Chong]

His stuff is awesome. I mean, obviously he died young. How did he die?

[Bill Maher]

An airplane.

[Tommy Chong]

Correct. Airplane, yeah. Wow.

[Bill Maher]

It was.

[Tommy Chong]

Airplanes are terrible to musicians. So many, when you think about it. Aaliyah and Buddy Holly and, you know, I guess because we. Because we. Yeah, yeah. Big Bopper. We're all in that same flight because I guess we all take planes. Little Planes to get to gigs at.

[Bill Maher]

One time or another.

[Tommy Chong]

Boy, and some of them are scary, right?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

It's not guaranteed it.

[Bill Maher]

You ever flown one of those double cockpit, open cockpit, and you fly really low over a lot of little lakes.

[Tommy Chong]

I think I have, yeah. In the Caribbean, I think. But I've also just been in the one with the guys out front by the wing doing it manually, practically, you know, like, oh, contact. You know, this is not a word I want to hear before we take off.

[Bill Maher]

You want to check the weather on one of those.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, but no. Well, I'm stopping doing it after this year.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

I may go back to it, but at least for one year. I've done it for 42 years. Take a rest, stand up. And I've done 13 HBO specials. I feel like time for a rest. I want to see if I will miss you. Don't know if you'll miss something that you've done that long unless you stop it. And then you'll go, oh, I either miss it or like, no, this is cool. I can, you know, I can get by with. Not like I don't have other jobs, but I also do love it. I mean, there's nothing like a live audience in a theater that came to see you. Nothing like so, you know, you're their hero to begin with.

[Cheech Marin]

Nothing like.

[Tommy Chong]

And then you want to. Makes you want to deliver to them so much. And it's just a wonderful.

[Bill Maher]

Our show kept us in shape. It was a real physical show. So it had to be, you know, in shape to do it. And so that was the, you know, part of it because we worked out all the time, went to the. We were members of the ymca. And when we toured in the early days, that was the best gym in town. And so we'd go there and dump the stuff at the hotel, go to the Y, play basketball, workout, blah, blah, blah. Come back, shower, do the show, party all night, ba boom. Come back and get on the plane, repeat.

[Tommy Chong]

What was party all night? Let's go. Let's stop the tape there. And then zero in on. On that. I'm interested in that.

[Bill Maher]

Well, we celebrated a lot of birthdays, you know, for the birthdays. No, you know, fans. We were just starting to be known. And so they were. There was.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, there's different circuits.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Club circuits.

[Cheech Marin]

And when you get into that one circuit and you get introduced to. It's like flying first class, you know?

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. I mean, the Eagles used to call their after party the third encore.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, no, no. There was a bunch of those guys, and there was just two of us. That's the multiple there.

[Tommy Chong]

But you'd go out because I used to go out.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, yeah, we'd go out, we'd party, you know, meet people and hey, have fun.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

Then you learn who not to go out with.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Who's that?

[Cheech Marin]

The bouncer or the crazy guy?

[Bill Maher]

Just got. Came back from Nam and he's got a.45.

[Cheech Marin]

You want to see it?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Cops, though. I've sometimes been befriended by cops. They could, like, get your places fast.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

It's not the worst thing in the world. I mean, I'm against police corruption fully, except when it benefits me even slightly. I don't think it's taking away from the safety of the other citizens.

[Cheech Marin]

Just a minute. Will I turn off this camera?

[Tommy Chong]

They get me to the game a little early. I don't think it's. I don't think it's. If there's a crime, I would say go.

[Bill Maher]

Yes, go.

[Tommy Chong]

That's more important. I'd be an asshole not to. And I wouldn't. Okay, as long as.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, God. And there's such a temptation to take advantage of that, you know?

[Tommy Chong]

But, yeah, cops are, you know, cops are people. It's my.

[Bill Maher]

My dad was LAPD for 30 years.

[Tommy Chong]

Really?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

And.

[Bill Maher]

And I, you know, he only hung out with policemen and family. That was it.

[Tommy Chong]

But what is your assessment like of after knowing him that long, being his kid and seeing him. Like, it made him angry or it didn't. It was his job. But he was able to leave it at the office or, you know, he was always angry.

[Bill Maher]

He was always angry. He was angry. He felt unloved as a child and.

[Cheech Marin]

Well, he was on Melbourne, probably.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, then he went into the wrong business.

[Bill Maher]

Well, no, but he was like a boxer and he was in the Navy. He was a radioman on a pby, which is like a target. And then he came out of that. And all those guys in the World War II, they came out of that and they were a little cell shocked. And then they just wanted it to stop for a little while.

[Tommy Chong]

I feel. Cops feel like everybody else doesn't really appreciate that they're doing something that you wouldn't do that's super necessary to do, which is to keep the shit to shoe level.

[Bill Maher]

Yes, exactly right.

[Tommy Chong]

And I think we'd all agree that there are a certain percentage of people in this country, native or not, who are dirtbags, and we have to deal with them.

[Bill Maher]

Yes.

[Tommy Chong]

And you're not. Not appreciating it. And I don't think they're wrong. They also. I also have been very critical of them for like, just actual things they do, like stop firing the whole clip at the. Like. Like, we fire more bullets, like in one incident. This is true. Than Germany once fired in a year.

[Bill Maher]

Really?

[Tommy Chong]

Like Germany police. German Police fired like 89 bullets from here, like 20 years ago. 89 bullet. That's one cliff. Things like that that I'm critical of. And, you know, just. And the bad attitude, just the, you.

[Cheech Marin]

Know, well, you're trained to fire, you know, unless you're training. And then they add that training to guilt.

[Tommy Chong]

They need to redo the training a little bit, I think.

[Cheech Marin]

Keep it.

[Tommy Chong]

But again, like, it's a job we can understand.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

And it's. It is super necessary.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

You.

[Bill Maher]

It made sense for my dad because he just came out of the navy and it was a civilian Navy. There was structure there. He knew exactly what to do and where the law was and how was to enforce that. And so. And he liked that discipline in his life.

[Tommy Chong]

But he stayed angry.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, he was always angry.

[Tommy Chong]

I don't know why the family didn't help.

[Bill Maher]

No, no, he was always angry. A neighbor when we moved to Granada Hills named John Cox and I played with his kids. And he says, oscar, you're the most level, even tempered man I've ever met. Always angry. Yeah, but. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

I don't think that's good for your health.

[Bill Maher]

No, no, I don't think it is. But all in. And then when all those policemen, they drank, you know, of course, as soon as they got off.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, and I think that's what they mean. That's what they're saying. It's like, you know what? I do a job that's a little more important than yours and makes you a little more tense, you know, do you have to, like, drink after your shift because of what you saw or you did or whatever? And I'm sure there are many days when a cop's life is just fucking normal. Most of it. I mean, we see them riding around, but also at any minute it can be.

[Cheech Marin]

Harry, have you ever done a ride along?

[Tommy Chong]

No, but I saw the movie My.

[Bill Maher]

Life is Riding Along.

[Cheech Marin]

I did ride along.

[Bill Maher]

Is it?

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, but you were in the back scene, Tommy.

[Cheech Marin]

Hey, listen, I was up there. I was right up there. It was funny. The first stop we made, I'm walking up with Jay, the guy in the Cop, and the lady that phoned it in, and she looked at me and she said, oh, you got him, did you? He said, That I was a perpetrator.

[Bill Maher]

I was.

[Cheech Marin]

Oh, well, you caught him already.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

So what did you learn on this ride along?

[Cheech Marin]

Oh, I learned that the adrenaline rush is so crazy when. What happens when you're going to a call?

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah. You don't know what's behind being a cop.

[Tommy Chong]

Like, imagine you're just riding around in your car with a couple of friends or one friend, and. But the little wrinkle is something can come into your car over the radio that tells you to go to some place where somebody's being violent.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, that would be. I could see why you'd need a drink.

[Cheech Marin]

And then you don't know who's got the gun and who's got what, and what are you reaching for? And then, like, being there. Now you got. They're performing for you, you know, so the cops were performing for me.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Cheech Marin]

You know, of course, it was a good performance, too. And the last thing they did was stop two ladies for no reason, you know, other than, what's your number?

[Bill Maher]

You know?

[Tommy Chong]

Right. That I must say, of all the things that bug me about cops, that's, like, top of the list. Because I've never known a girl who didn't have a story about cops hitting on her. It's like, you know, guys are horrible. Like, everybody's got their own sort of scam and. But that's one of the lowest. You know, it's like. And I've heard every story, and it is a lot of that pull you over and driving while pretty. That's the real problem in this country. Nobody talks about that, but it's kind of true. But it's a good one. Yeah. When you give. Give other humans this monopoly on violence, first of all, they can use a gun. You can't. You know, and there's a little bit of the Judge Dredd in it, you know? Remember Judge Dredd, the Stallone movie where the cop and the Judge are basically the same person? They pull you over and they're judging. Your cop can kind of do that.

[Bill Maher]

They can in the right situation. Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

We got pulled over in Houston. Remember? Coming back from fishing?

[Tommy Chong]

That's because you're a Chinaman and they're out to get you.

[Bill Maher]

Why, you name Tong?

[Cheech Marin]

No, they.

[Tommy Chong]

What are you smuggling in chopsticks, comrade?

[Cheech Marin]

We had listened to a lecture from the Judge. The Judge gave us a lecture. Hope you boys ain't in a hurry.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, where is this?

[Cheech Marin]

Now, where was that coming back from? The. From gal from Houston. We're heading for Houston.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, but we were In Galveston.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah, we'd been fishing. Yeah, we've been out fishing.

[Bill Maher]

We did.

[Cheech Marin]

Got some fish too.

[Bill Maher]

Gig in Galveston and then we stayed for a day or two after that. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

You both like to fish?

[Bill Maher]

I do, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Interesting.

[Bill Maher]

I've taken him out fishing before.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, I feel bad for the fish. Do the hook in the mouth. Oh, I know, it's terrible. And I hate fish. So it's not like, you know, uber fish. I did when I was a child. Maybe it seared my conscience. I remember once going out. Yes. We had a house on the Jersey shore and went out and there was like, you know, this thing you could go to the grimy look with this shitty, like a puddle shop that's all taffy and crazy.

[Bill Maher]

I know exactly the case.

[Tommy Chong]

Okay. Sunglasses. The big T shirts, you know. Okay, so like at that thing, the big part is Barney at light. Okay. So there was a ship that went out. A ship? Oh, a ship, yeah, it was Jeff Bezos yacht. No, it was this fucking trawler that some guy, you know, and you could. You were guaranteed to catch fit. And we did. I caught like 10 ling.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, really?

[Tommy Chong]

Lingcod, Whatever the fuck that was. I haven't heard of it before or after.

[Bill Maher]

Lingcod. Yeah, Ling. Ling.

[Tommy Chong]

You've heard of it? L I N G. Yeah. Okay. I never heard of it. No, I never was in a restaurant.

[Cheech Marin]

Try the lane, some area. Consider them garden, I think.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, let's not insult. Different kinds of.

[Cheech Marin]

I mean, but the Chinese, which I am, we love that everything comes back to China.

[Tommy Chong]

China.

[Cheech Marin]

Very good, Very good. Ling.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, I remember and of course, I was probably nine years old and I think there's a picture of me with a string of ling. Yeah, a string of ling. And I feel terrible about it. They must have, you know, back this is the 60s, the oceans weren't overfished as they are now.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

So yes, probably there were schools of ling. The ocean was teeming with life, which they slowly killed so they could have 10 year olds like me enjoy the great American pastime of killing something.

[Bill Maher]

Killing of the ling and then eating it later in the ceremony.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, you know, if we had eaten it later. No, I don't remember having for dinner. Seriously.

[Cheech Marin]

Steam Ling.

[Tommy Chong]

Steam Ling. The premiere of China. Steam.

[Bill Maher]

Linguistic steamling.

[Tommy Chong]

Tar.

[Bill Maher]

His steam Ling.

[Tommy Chong]

Tar. I hope in some small way I've had you guys been in the same room together. I'm not sure like why that is, but it means a lot to me. No, because, you know, I don't see you together a lot and like I say, just for the fans, for the young man in the 22nd row, it just feels good that my idols like each other.

[Bill Maher]

We do.

[Tommy Chong]

I know.

[Bill Maher]

We do like each other.

[Tommy Chong]

I know. I'm gonna nag you about it.

[Bill Maher]

We know more about each other than our wives.

[Tommy Chong]

Because I believe I made that point an hour ago.

[Bill Maher]

With each other on the road, you know, and you have. That process has to happen.

[Tommy Chong]

Exactly. Because the road gets lonely.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

You're going to reach for a friend.

[Bill Maher]

And love is the hurt.

[Tommy Chong]

Did you have to ever share a room at the beginning?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Like the Beatles.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, you did. You shared a room but not a bed.

[Bill Maher]

No.

[Tommy Chong]

Was there sometimes sexual activity going on in the room with another person when you were in the room, but not with a person or with a person of your own?

[Cheech Marin]

Before we answer that, we'll discuss this with the attorney. We refuse to answer that one on ground that it will definitely incriminate us.

[Bill Maher]

No. No.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, that was such good murmuring. That was really professional comedic murmuring like a lot of people can do. Look, you guys, every time some asshole at an office in Des Moines, Iowa, does a lame I was so stoned I ate a bag of Cheetos. Joke, you guys should get a check. Every time some mailman does a joke, bring it.

[Bill Maher]

See, you of the record generation, man. And you.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, yeah, I had your records.

[Bill Maher]

All those.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, yeah. LPs.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, that was. Yeah. And then they switched to where I.

[Tommy Chong]

Wish I still kept. I didn't keep the record. You know what? I kept the posters. Do you see the Supremes up there? That's from an album I had in the.

[Bill Maher]

Really?

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. That's the Supremes when they would put a poster in the lp.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Wow. They're very nice.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. I'm not saying I used it as a masturbation device. And I'm not saying I'm not. I'm just saying it was 30 years before Pornhub.

[Bill Maher]

Maybe that's what art is for.

[Tommy Chong]

I feel like that actually. Really, I'm not gonna say made me the man I am today, but the idea that you had to use imagination and pretty much only imagination for what was the most important thing in your life at that age was getting the pussy that I could not get.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, exactly.

[Tommy Chong]

I couldn't even talk to.

[Bill Maher]

That whole process is.

[Tommy Chong]

So painful.

[Bill Maher]

And it's different for everybody. Variations on a thing.

[Tommy Chong]

Would I like to have a 17 year old's liver? Yes. But if I had to take a 17 year old's brain to go with.

[Bill Maher]

It, no.

[Tommy Chong]

That'S the deal breaker.

[Bill Maher]

And you do some stupid shit. And I did some stupid shit at that age, you know, so I understand that age.

[Tommy Chong]

I forgive myself. Yeah, I don't forgive the stupid shit I did at 40. Well, you know, that's what hurts because you're supposed to be better and women are better. Like, women come in.

[Bill Maher]

So, you know, that's not.

[Tommy Chong]

But women, like mature at like 25, they're like over. Most of them are just over. Silly bullshit.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, they're in.

[Tommy Chong]

They're not into the girls just want to have fun phase. They're into put a ring on it, you know, they're just. It gets serious. Right. But not men. That's why, like when I was 37, it's like, oh my, I'm so old. So old. No, now you're dangerous, you know, now you have a car.

[Bill Maher]

And a nice.

[Tommy Chong]

Car, you know, you can get into a restaurant.

[Bill Maher]

Girls are impressed by a nice car when they sit in a nice car. I noticed that.

[Tommy Chong]

There's so many things I've noticed, never understood about girls.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

But among them is that cars, like what? I'm not into cars. Like, who gives a. Guys, like, just. Yeah, what am I right?

[Bill Maher]

What are you driving, Alexis? I think.

[Tommy Chong]

What do you drive, Chinaman?

[Cheech Marin]

Tesla. A Tesla?

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. Oh, typical comrade.

[Cheech Marin]

When I get driven around, he's always.

[Bill Maher]

Got the most avant garde car of his time.

[Tommy Chong]

Really?

[Bill Maher]

He had a Citroen Maserati one time and the highest. And it was stolen. And it was out of the repair shop. The Citroen repair shop was stolen and it was gone for like three months. And they said, we called it mother found it, came back with a burnt out clutch. And I conquered the Baja sticker.

[Tommy Chong]

Really? And all the way to Mexico.

[Bill Maher]

He took it to Mexico, to Baja. One time they came out of his store and the kid was looking at his car saying, mister, is this your car? Yes.

[Cheech Marin]

Sure.

[Bill Maher]

It's ugly. That was the best one. He always has.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, man, I love that you're not precious about doing the Mexican accent.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, no, no.

[Tommy Chong]

But I mean, come on, just between us girls, there are a lot of people in show business who are very precious.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, I'm sure.

[Tommy Chong]

And you know, but funny's funny. Funny's money.

[Bill Maher]

At this point. It's nice to have a track record. So, you know, it's a foundation.

[Tommy Chong]

But I mean, like, who's it hurting? Some of you, you know, who's it hurting? I know, that's the thing. I mean, they are way too sensitive these days.

[Bill Maher]

Don't you think in general, it's a sensitive time here? Everybody's fucking sensitive.

[Tommy Chong]

Right? But I mean, I don't know what exactly they could go after that you guys did. And partly you're protected because you wear the magic armor of not being limitations. White.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, well, see, that's it.

[Tommy Chong]

That. So I don't think they would go after you.

[Cheech Marin]

No.

[Tommy Chong]

But you look at any movie from 20 years ago, 30 years ago, I swear to God, you will not be able to go 10 minutes without finding something we just wouldn't do in a movie now. You know, just people were different and the mores were different.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, the rhythm was different. It's. You know, it was a different music. Just like there was different music. Strains come through.

[Tommy Chong]

I mean, people in the 90s, they hit women in movies. Like the Good Guy.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Really?

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, yeah. Andy Garcia does it in that great copy movie with Richard Gere.

[Cheech Marin]

Oh, the remake?

[Tommy Chong]

No, it wasn't a remake. It was called Internal Affairs. I think it's Richard Gere's best movie. He's awesome. And he's the bad cop.

[Cheech Marin]

Oh, I want to see that.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, you never saw that. Andy Garcia is the good cop, and he's married to Nancy Travis, and he hits her like. And it's okay. He's the good guy guy. It's just like. And it's even worse because they're like, well, he's a hothead, you know. You know who the hotheads are? The Chinese.

[Bill Maher]

The Chinese hotheads.

[Tommy Chong]

No, they're the name Chung. It will be a very interesting story as it plays out to see who is the winner of the 21st century, because you could make a case for China. They have many advantages. We don't like being a dictatorship. They can just decide to do something and they do it. They can build a Bridge in 19 days if they want to. 2014, they said they declared a war on global warming. Yeah, they went way faster because they could just order people to do it. And they're a surveillance state. Horrible surveillance state. Everybody's under surveillance. We're getting there, but we're still kind of free. And people want to come here, you know, and we have advantages they don't have. I mean, our tech industries kill in the world. Like, we are so dominant in the one industry that is the dominant industry, Facebook and Google and, you know, Apple. And they all want to be that, and they're not. So maybe we'll stay supreme or maybe your side will win Bow to you.

[Cheech Marin]

But I won't forget my friends oh, Good. What's your name again?

[Bill Maher]

Tongue.

[Cheech Marin]

Tongue.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, that's a good reason to have some Republican friends in case they win. You don't want to be that Guantanamo Bay thing you were talking about. It's nice to have some friends on the other side. Do you?

[Bill Maher]

I don't know, Judge by then.

[Tommy Chong]

You don't have any Republican friends. I do.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

I guess you shouldn't judge people by that.

[Bill Maher]

No. Just depends on how annoying they are about being Trumpy, you know?

[Tommy Chong]

Well, I mean, not every Republican is Trumpy. Well, okay, but even when they're Trumpy, you don't have to talk about it all the time. You know, I always say you can hate him, you can't hate everybody who likes him.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, that is.

[Tommy Chong]

It's half the country. And there's some people you like, there's some musicians you like, I'm sure, who voted for Trump, and they're just not bad people. It would take too long and it's too mischiegost and it's too political to get into why that is. It just is. First of all, I most. I think politics comes out of people's personality. Like, you have a personality first.

[Cheech Marin]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Like you're a prig. You're the Christian guy who's like, poking in the wrong hole and you know, God and I only kissed one woman. Okay. That's his personality. Now what party is he gonna go into? The Republicans? Right. He's. That's. Or, oh, my God, I'm like scared of everything. And I think everyone should wear masks all the time, even at home, to prevent even one death. You know, there are people like that. What party are they going to? The Democrats, Right?

[Bill Maher]

Yep.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. So it's all like, personal, but I don't hate people for their personalities.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Because we all know that from family. You know, my uncles, some of them were like, oh, this guy's kind of a dick. But, you know, he's our dick now. You know, my father's sister married him and Okay. I remember my parents attitude was like, yeah, we get it. He's kind of a. They knew he was Republican. Yeah, yeah, they didn't love it, but it wasn't like a deal breaker. It's like, we didn't have Thanksgiving and he is who he is. And that's what bugs me the most about what goes on today is the people who are like, I don't breathe the same air as you.

[Bill Maher]

No. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Like, fuck off.

[Bill Maher]

You're right.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, I'm always right. Only everyone would understand that we could save A lot of time.

[Bill Maher]

I was telling you, Suylen Green is human.

[Tommy Chong]

You've had a nice acting career. You do.

[Bill Maher]

Thank you.

[Tommy Chong]

I used to watch Nash Bridges.

[Bill Maher]

You learned a lot about Cameron. That show boy, amazing. And it was fun working with Don and that cast always loved to him and we had a good rhythm.

[Tommy Chong]

You know, he is one of those good looking chicks of gods that, you know, the girls want to want him and the guys want to be him.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

And. But he was always cool about it.

[Bill Maher]

He loves to have a good time.

[Tommy Chong]

He loves to have a good time, but. Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, wow. He loves it. I stepped right into an hour show and that's like takes over your life. That's all you do is the show.

[Tommy Chong]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

And then you wake up and go there.

[Tommy Chong]

No, I remember in the 80s, I mostly made my living as an actor because that's what we all did as young comics. I kept doing comedy on the Tonight show and stuff, but it was like, no, you gotta get a sitcom. You know, that's where everyone's mentality was. Yeah, I'd be the next Freddie Prinze. Yeah, well, I mean, not everyone.

[Bill Maher]

Thank you very much.

[Tommy Chong]

Bad example. You know what? I'd worry about it, but like how many people watching even remember. It's a shame. He was a giant talent. I remember. Do you remember him on the Tonight when he. I mean, that was a major first of all, there weren't non white comics again, kids, we've come a long way just in our lifetimes. But yeah, having a Puerto Rican. I mean, there were black comics. Bill Cosby and Flip Wilson. Yes. It wasn't like quite that bad, but I don't remember a Puerto Rican one. I mean, that was his book, right? Was that. And his whole first set was about, you know, Puerto Rican and Puerto Rican guy and things I do or what a Puerto Rican would do, you know, and America found it charming and confessional and, you know, I remember that thing about my super in the building, you know, and people are in Iowa, like, what's a building, honey, it's a place where people live back where they crowd them together with all the minorities. Okay, a building. All right, so an apartment at a Super. Like, and you know, when Freddie would go to a super, the super would always say, it's not my job, not my job. Yeah, look who I'm saying it in front of, the maestro.

[Bill Maher]

It's cool. Because there was still that west, east, east, west divide, you know, because of the predominance of Mexican culture out here in la. Are we in la.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Or. And back east in New York, Puerto Rican culture. Was that. So that was. There were two different sides of the deal. But he was playing. If he could compare it to music and that salsa rhythm. Or that.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. I always thought it was silly at best that the census would list, like, Latino and then lump in and Puerto Rican. Mexican. Cuban.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

It's like you're.

[Bill Maher]

That's why they came up with this.

[Tommy Chong]

You're lumping. You're lucky they're not killing each other.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, no, it's. Then they came up with the Hispanic that I just like.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. And then Hispanics. And then for me, Latinx.

[Bill Maher]

Latinx. No, that's after Chicano. When I first. When I first became aware of the term Chicano, that's who I am. That describes me to a T. You know, it's a Mexican American with a kind of defiant political attitude, you know, and confrontive. And his art is about that. And that's what I saw at the beginning of it. And it was a movement that, you.

[Tommy Chong]

Know, that's what the word Chicano means.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Just for you or.

[Bill Maher]

No, no. I never realized that it was an insult from Mexicans to other Mexicans living in the United States because they were not Mexicanos anymore. They were something else because they had moved to the other side of the border and they were living in tin shacks, and they were. And they were. There's something less. And so there were chicos, they were little Mexicans, Chicanos. And so they were los dejo, the underclass. And so that's where. And so at the first, it was an insult and, you know, depending on where you lived. But over the years, you know, as those. My father's generations grew up, always called themselves Chicanos, you know.

[Tommy Chong]

Well, to show how far we've come. Again, like, I won't say this is when I was born, but not that long before I was born, the most prominent actor to play a Mexican in a movie was Spencer Tracy.

[Bill Maher]

The Old man in the Sea.

[Tommy Chong]

He did a couple of. Steinbeck. Yeah. You know, that's who they. It's like, us. All right, we need a Mexican American casting call. Spencer Tracy.

[Bill Maher]

Spencer Tracy.

[Tommy Chong]

And they just were. I can't.

[Bill Maher]

How much number five, addiction pancake do you have?

[Tommy Chong]

Just the level of change, like, to go from that to, like. Can you imagine? I always want to say to these people, just imagine suggesting that today. Yeah, yeah. Let's do Glenn Powell as the Mexican. Yeah, yeah. They would just fucking shoot you.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

[Tommy Chong]

But I Have to say, Spencer Tracy, great as a man. I mean, I was totally into it. I watched Giant recently.

[Bill Maher]

Did you?

[Tommy Chong]

That's exactly the right reaction, because I'd always heard it was great. Like this classic. You remember the movie?

[Cheech Marin]

Oh, yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Okay. Rock Hudson, Elizabeth Taylor at her height of Vava V. James Dee, James Dean right before the. Again, planes. Oh, no, that was a car. Okay.

[Bill Maher]

No, it's a car.

[Tommy Chong]

So. Well, I was bored to tears. But to me, it was like, oh, this great classic. It's going to be great. But I see why it was ahead of its time. It was 1956, the year I was born. And it's about racism in Texas and how they treated Mexicans. And, you know, that was new.

[Bill Maher]

A big studio to do. Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Yes. So I think that's why that movie hangs on that reputation, because it just did something groundbreaking. Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Well, there you go. Oh, sometimes the wedge gets. You cannot look at any form of entertainment right now and not see some kind of Latin nature in the credits somewhere on every level.

[Tommy Chong]

You know, the world has just come such a long way. And the problem with the woke people sometimes is, like, they really just hate to acknowledge the progress. It's like I'm just being real. I'm not saying we should stop or that we're all there, but, like, what? The Olympics? Like, I've watched the Olympics since I was a kid. Like, white countries had. Just white people now every country. And again, I'm not complaining about this. I'm celebrating it.

[Cheech Marin]

Great.

[Tommy Chong]

We're all mixed together now. But, you know, Ireland had black athletes. The only country no blacks, Russia. Which is why the Fox News crowd loves Russia, because it's like, the last place where they're like, mm, mm. We don't do that.

[Bill Maher]

Most black Russians. No.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, that's a drink.

[Bill Maher]

That's a drink.

[Tommy Chong]

That's not a thing. Not a drink, not a thing. That's Putin's motto. But, yeah, like the world. I think I read in Andrew Sullivan's column that, like, London used to be, like, in the 60s or something, like, I don't know, 10% non white, and now it's like 80%. I'm sure I have those numbers wrong, but it's some huge number like this. Again, not complaining, just saying, let's acknowledge this is where the world is. This is what liberals wanted is what we were asking for. So, you know, refine it now. Yeah, yeah. There's work to be done always. But let's pretend this.

[Bill Maher]

I mean, just on a gastronomic level, we started going To London when it was 73. 70. Right around 70. First time around that. And the food was horrible.

[Tommy Chong]

Horrible.

[Bill Maher]

It was just horrible.

[Tommy Chong]

Yep.

[Bill Maher]

And it was Indian food or if you could find them good. But over the years, boom, London was popping with good restaurants.

[Tommy Chong]

Oh, of course, it's completely Americanized now. For better and worse.

[Bill Maher]

Well, they have international, you know, but.

[Tommy Chong]

Not just the food. I mean, I remember going to London the first time in the mid-80s. And first of all, it was all white.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

And there was like two television shows really on at night.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tommy Chong]

Like, there was two stations like BBC one and BBC two. Like, commercial fun. Television just wasn't a thing. And this is the 80s when I went back in the 90s. Oh, it. You know, then it was like the same game shows, but in British. The same. And we took some of them. Wasn't Simon Cowell's stuff. Isn't that. You know, there's just been a big cross seeding of American and British television. You know, we liked the same bullshit. They'd have their version of like, whatever, you know, bachelor or, you know, fuck me, Islander, whatever it is, is, you know. So, yeah, we're. We're. We're probably two alike where they used, you know, I hope.

[Bill Maher]

I don't know what the state of it is now, but like.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah, well, London. Expensive.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. I haven't been there in a while. Have you been to London lately?

[Cheech Marin]

No.

[Bill Maher]

No.

[Cheech Marin]

Italy. Italy. Italy was the last time.

[Tommy Chong]

You wouldn't know if he left the country.

[Cheech Marin]

I was in Italy.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah.

[Cheech Marin]

Sicily then.

[Bill Maher]

I have to pee.

[Tommy Chong]

Yeah. I'm gonna release you. I could talk to you guys all night. It's so much fun. I'm so flattered that you would just come here and do this. I know you don't do a lot of things together. It just meant pleasant. Meant the world to me and, like, loved it. Every bad comic who does a pot joke owns pathetic gratitude. All right, I'll let you all go. Thank you.

[Cheech Marin]

Thanks, Bill.

[Tommy Chong]

All right.