Tony Hinchcliffe | Club Random

Summary

Club Random with Bill Maher: Episode featuring Tony Hinchcliffe

Episode Overview Released on May 11, 2025, Club Random is a unique podcast series hosted by Bill Maher, known for his candid and often provocative conversations. In this episode, Bill engages in an hour-long dialogue with Tony Hinchcliffe, a renowned comedian and Trump supporter. Set in the undisclosed location of Club Random, the conversation delves into the realms of comedy, personal experiences, political views, and societal observations, steering clear of mainstream political discourse to explore a broader spectrum of topics.

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1. Introduction to Comedy Beginnings

[02:04] Tony Hinchcliffe: "I'm here. Hello."

Bill Maher begins the conversation with a light-hearted exchange, easing into Tony's background in comedy. Tony recounts his start at the Comedy Store, highlighting the challenges and memorable moments that shaped his career.

Notable Quote: [03:04] Tony Hinchcliffe: "I started at the comedy store literally 18 years ago yesterday."

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2. Experiences at the Comedy Store

Tony shares anecdotes about working during a tumultuous period at the Comedy Store, including interactions with Mitzi Shore and witnessing the rise of now-famous comedians.

Key Points:

• Tony worked extensively at the Comedy Store, managing phone calls and ticket sales before the advent of online booking.
• Recollection of Mitzi Shore’s strict management style and her pivotal role in promoting talent.
• Witnessing Nicole Buchanan's rise to prominence during a showcase event.

Notable Quotes: [07:01] Tony Hinchcliffe: "When I got to the Comedy Store, it was a very interesting time because obviously Mitzi Shore was really sick."

[05:15] Bill Maher: "I certainly remember. I don't remember the names."

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3. The Ghost Story at the Comedy Store

A significant portion of the episode revolves around Tony's eerie encounter with a ghost-like apparition at the Comedy Store, blending personal experience with humor.

Key Points:

• Tony describes seeing a transparent, jellyfish-like figure in the Belly Room, a section designated for women comedians.
• The encounter initially scared him, but he chose not to share the experience to avoid being labeled as paranoid or high.
• Later that night, the long-time piano player Jeff Scott also experiences a similar sighting, confirming the supernatural occurrence.

Notable Quotes: [11:23] Tony Hinchcliffe: "I had been there a while. I. Yeah, I hadn't either."

[12:38] Bill Maher: "A ghost. Yeah."

[16:40] Tony Hinchcliffe: "It was the same exact thing, except this time it was outside and it moved."

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4. Political Views and the Trump Rally Incident

The conversation shifts towards Tony's political stance, particularly his support for Donald Trump, and the repercussions of performing at a Trump rally.

Key Points:

• Tony discusses his decision to perform at a Trump rally, emphasizing his intent to support free speech and influence votes.
• Bill shares his own complex relationship with Trump, including a notable dinner where he presented a list of insults Trump had directed at him.
• They debate the societal polarization surrounding Trump supporters and the challenges of maintaining open dialogues across political divides.

Notable Quotes: [22:32] Tony Hinchcliffe: "I think he gets a weird, weird, weird rap in this world, man."

[30:03] Tony Hinchcliffe: "Isn't it wild?"

[30:19] Bill Maher: "And it will always be one of the coolest artifacts in the..."

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5. The Comedy Scene: Los Angeles vs. Austin

Tony contrasts the vibrant comedy scenes in Los Angeles and Austin, highlighting the differences in audience reception and club dynamics.

Key Points:

• Discussing the density and variety of comedy clubs in Austin compared to Los Angeles.
• Tony reflects on the demands of maintaining a weekly live show without a live audience during the pandemic.
• Bill reminisces about his road experiences and the importance of live audiences in honing comedic skills.

Notable Quotes: [71:05] Bill Maher: "So Rogan has one. That must be the Rogan has Granddaddy Club, right?"

[73:06] Bill Maher: "Did you ever repeat the same joke in the..."

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6. Personal Lives and Relationships

The duo delves into their personal lives, discussing relationships, marriage, and the impact of lifestyle choices on their careers.

Key Points:

• Tony shares his brief marriage to an Australian woman, emphasizing the mutual respect and enduring friendship post-divorce.
• Bill reflects on his decision to remain unmarried, valuing personal independence and the ability to speak freely without relational constraints.
• They touch upon the challenges of balancing personal life with the demands of a career in comedy and media.

Notable Quotes: [103:25] Bill Maher: "Oh, I'm the one smoking."

[105:24] Tony Hinchcliffe: "So I think she only did it so that he would hang out sometimes once in a great while."

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7. Societal Observations and Racism

The conversation broadens to address societal issues, including racism, media portrayal, and the evolving landscape of American culture.

Key Points:

• Bill criticizes the overuse of derogatory comparisons, such as likening Trump to Hitler, highlighting the absurdity and offensiveness of such rhetoric.
• They discuss the persistence of racism in America, noting both overt and subtle manifestations.
• Tony emphasizes the importance of acceptance and the dangers of blanket statements that further divide communities.

Notable Quotes: [89:04] Tony Hinchcliffe: "I think he's going to do something that’s not okay."

[89:17] Bill Maher: "You can't. Don't try to, you know, don't answer that conversation like, who was better than Michael Jordan?"

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8. The Role of Comedy in Society

Both Bill and Tony explore the significance of comedy as a medium for honest dialogue, challenging societal norms, and bridging political divides.

Key Points:

• Comedy is portrayed as a tool for "calling out bullshit" and maintaining honesty in a polarized environment.
• They discuss the pressures comedians face to conform to political correctness versus the freedom to express unfiltered thoughts.
• The importance of maintaining a distinct comedic voice that resonates with diverse audiences is emphasized.

Notable Quotes: [77:57] Tony Hinchcliffe: "Yeah, that guy did a lot of..."

[84:15] Tony Hinchcliffe: "But I ra."

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9. Concluding Thoughts

As the conversation winds down, Bill and Tony reaffirm their mutual respect despite differing political views, emphasizing the value of open dialogue and acceptance.

Key Points:

• Acknowledgment of the challenges in maintaining relationships across political lines.
• Emphasis on personal integrity and the importance of not succumbing to societal pressures to conform.
• Final reflections on the enduring power of comedy to foster understanding and bring people together.

Notable Quotes: [86:38] Bill Maher: "We tried that, and maybe that has very little success."

[89:04] Tony Hinchcliffe: "I've been defending Bill Belichick in the green room of the mothership, sweetheart."

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Additional Highlights

• Live Show Dynamics: Insights into the logistics and emotional toll of performing multiple shows, emphasizing the importance of energy and creativity.
• Cultural References: Discussions around Game of Thrones and its impact on societal perceptions of leadership and downfall.
• Personal Anecdotes: Tony recounts his early days in comedy, living in the backseat of his car, and the sacrifices made to pursue his passion.

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Conclusion This episode of Club Random offers a candid and multifaceted dialogue between Bill Maher and Tony Hinchcliffe. It navigates through personal experiences in the world of comedy, supernatural encounters, political affiliations, and societal critiques. The conversation underscores the role of comedy in challenging norms, fostering dialogue, and bridging divides, all while maintaining a humorous and engaging tone.

Recommended For: Listeners interested in the intersection of comedy, politics, and personal narratives, seeking an authentic and thought-provoking conversation free from conventional podcasting constraints.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• [03:04] Tony Hinchcliffe: "I started at the comedy store literally 18 years ago yesterday."
• [12:38] Bill Maher: "A ghost. Yeah."
• [22:32] Tony Hinchcliffe: "I think he gets a weird, weird, weird rap in this world, man."
• [89:04] Tony Hinchcliffe: "I think he's going to do something that’s not okay."
• [105:29] Bill Maher: "Anything is potentially... I mean, Justin Timberlake once apologized for complimenting a black singer."

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Note: This summary intentionally omits advertisement segments and non-content sections to focus solely on the substantive discussions between Bill Maher and Tony Hinchcliffe.

Transcript

[Bill Maher]

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[Tony Hinchcliff]

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[Bill Maher]

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[Tony Hinchcliff]

Who was it?

[Bill Maher]

Abraham Lincoln. I mean, even though he's like the last guy I would have over here to Club Random to like have a good.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

That would really make it random. Club Random.

[Bill Maher]

Guest here.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I'm here. Hello.

[Bill Maher]

Play swept. Swept up.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

How's it going, my man?

[Bill Maher]

How are you?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Good. So nice to meet you.

[Bill Maher]

Tony.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Tony Hinchcliff. Bill Maher. A pleasure to meet you.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, the insult coming. I could feel the barbs coming. Should I not sit in the front row?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No, you're safe. You're safe.

[Bill Maher]

I'm in the front row. Am I going to get spritzed with the comic barbs? You know, going to ask me where I'm from?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No, no crowd work on you.

[Bill Maher]

No, come on, do some crowd work. Ask me where I'm from.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Where are you from?

[Bill Maher]

New Jersey. Come on. There's a slow pitch down the middle of the plate, bro. New Jersey.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

That is a real. That is a hole indeed.

[Bill Maher]

Well, come on, you could do better than the shithole. Isn't that what you're warm up?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I like to. I like to feel the people and know Them a little bit better than.

[Bill Maher]

Just straight up, ask me what I do. And then I say nothing. And you say, how do you know when you're done? And then tip your waitress.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

That's it.

[Bill Maher]

So you came up through the clubs, right?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yes, I started.

[Bill Maher]

Still in the clubs.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yep. Started at the comedy store literally 18 years ago yesterday. My mom texts me every year on May 6th and reminds me. I forget. She texts me happy anniversary.

[Bill Maher]

How does she know that you just tell her everything?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Well, no, I told her that early on and she marked the calendar and she found it to be so interesting. My adventure into comedy and the whole Myth Shore thing moms are obsessed with finding out about. At least my mom found it so intriguing that there was such a powerful, diabolical, cool ass woman that existed.

[Bill Maher]

She was all those things. Yeah, she was cool. I never knew Mitzi. I mean, I auditioned. Like I was an improv act out here.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Not that you couldn't do both, but I was just not her type of act. She went for the more like that's how we say, theatrical.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Usually not all of them. Letterman worked there. He certainly was a dry monologist.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Leno. But I felt like when I was there, and I go there now just for fun every once in a while, I think it's great.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I actually heard you were there on quite the magical night, laying low. You were sitting back and it just so happened. I don't even know if you know this story.

[Bill Maher]

I don't.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It just so happened to be the night that the new brand spanking new that day talent coordinator took over, which is a big deal. I think the last time they had a new booker slash talent coordinator there was eight or 10 or something years ago. And actually it was five years ago. And so it happened. And somehow, coincidentally on that night, a comedian or whoever was supposed to go up wasn't there. And there was a young lady who we all know, Nicole Buchanan, sitting in the back of the room who wasn't a paid regular and the new talent coordinator who everybody's loved forever, but she was just a bartender and she worked her way up to being the booker. The trusted tastemaker of the store got Nicole Buchanan to go on stage. And you watched. I don't even know if you know this. You watched a young lady that was so funny that everybody knows and loves become a paid regular right in front of you that night.

[Bill Maher]

I certainly remember. I don't remember the names.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

But I do remember this highlight of the night was a woman comic. I mean, it often is by the way when I go there, I'm not that the guys aren't funny, too, but, you know, I don't know, I just think they. This person was a scream, and I did not know that story.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, she's great. And I've known her forever. She came up in the little Roast Battle world.

[Bill Maher]

Well, it's the one I'm thinking of.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, it is.

[Bill Maher]

And that's funny. You said a talent coordinator. When I started in New York, the emcee was the talent coordinator. There was no talent coordinator. They, you know, basically deputized one of the comedians. It was the plum job, because then you weren't fighting city hall, otherwise you were fighting city. You could either fight city hall or be city hall if you were. The MC also got paid $50. The comics got cab fare, $50 a night. Wow. So, yeah, that was it. And then that's the person who, like, made all the decisions. You go on. Then you go on after him. You know, it was a. You know, you could. I don't remember anybody being corrupt about it, but it was certainly someone's personal taste. But then again, of course, it always is, right? You know?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

I mean, is that your. That's so interesting memory of starting out at the Comedy Store. You thought it was fair or you thought it was like, ooh.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

When I got to the Comedy Store, it was a very interesting time because obviously Mitzi Shore was really sick. She had already had Parkinson's for 15 or 20 years or something.

[Bill Maher]

Really?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. But she would come in and watch showcases, and most importantly, she would call all the time. And I took on the job of being the. At the Comedy Store when I got there. So I would work from, you know, like 11:00am to 7:00pm answering the phones, which back then. Cause the Comedy Store didn't have a website until very recently. That's how they sold tickets before. People would come in, they'd call and they'd go, is there a show going on there? What do you guys sell props or something? Like, people didn't know what a Comedy Store was. A lot of people. And so I would answer the phone and tell them, oh, yeah, it's a great show. I was often lying about how great the shows were back then because it was kind of a dark time in 2007. But then all of a sudden, you know, the phone would ring just like it would for a normal human calling to plan their trip a week out, and it would be, oh, hey, is Tommy there? What are you doing? Is there a lot of calls coming in? It's just this. And as a store guy, I mean, your heart would flutter, and it was just because famously, she would fire people if she didn't like your tone, your voice, anything. She was famous for firing people on the spot.

[Bill Maher]

I mean, some people are hearing this now. Who the fuck are they talking about? But certainly within the comic community, she's legendary the way, like, Sue Mangers. Not everybody knows who that is, but she got. She was at the first powerful woman agent.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And famous enough that they did a Broadway show about her. Bette Midler played her.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Huh.

[Bill Maher]

Do you know? Oh, yeah, it was called. I don't remember what it was called. Like, come to lunch or something. I used to go over her house all the time. I mean, I was lucky. She just was a fan and invited me. And she'd have the most amazing dinner parties with like. Like, whoever she could just summon whoever it was. So it was like some of the new guard, you know, it'd be like, you know, Daniel Craig fresh from the latest James Bond with Sidney Poitier and, you know, Joan Collins, you know, but. So Mitzi, I feel like, is similar in the comic world. And somebody should do a movie about her. It sounds like she's more of a. Almost better as a character.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, yeah, totally. I mean, that's something we've always. Comedy Store guys have always dreamed of. And it's a hell of a. I mean, the actual truth of her story is more amazing than.

[Bill Maher]

And she's Pauly Shore's mother. Yeah, right. People know Pauly Shore.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exactly. Which is interesting. Cause most people start with that. They go, that's Pauly Shore's mom. And it's like, yeah, yeah, but it's funny.

[Bill Maher]

And her husband was Sammy Sh. Who was also a comic.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Y.

[Bill Maher]

Not like a big comic, but not a failure. Right. I mean, club comic.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yep.

[Bill Maher]

I think respected among his peers. You know, one of those types who. Isn't that too much of Morty Gunty? You know, not really household names, but the comics know them, and some people know them. You know, I don't know if Shecky Green, you know, I don't think is as famous as Buddy Hackett.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

But as a comic, I don't see a huge difference.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

Since they're both dead.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

I could. I can speak freely.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

You know, so. Yeah. So he added. So Paulie grew up, you know, in the. In the cavernous attics of the Comedy Store. The haunted. But it's haunted, right? The Comedy Store. Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

You believe that? Have you ever seen chairs move?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I Hate, I hate that I have. But I did see a little something one time. It was the crazy. I hate that I saw it because it makes you sound crazy.

[Bill Maher]

You know, just always tell the truth. Yeah, that's my thing. I always just, you know, they got mad at me for telling the truth about the Trump dinner. I was like, we're just gonna tell the truth and people. So just tell the truth, you know, I understand your apprehension because it's like, well, then people say I'm this moron who believes in ghosts. Yeah, look, I ain't a moron and no one thinks I am. And I'm the first to say I don't know if I believe in ghosts. But I know so many people who are not crazy people. They're not religious and they weren't drunk. They swear to me. And they saw something that is just, for lack of a better word, some sort of ghost or spirit. So what, what is your story?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I had been there a while.

[Bill Maher]

I have not.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I. Yeah, I hadn't either. Like I said, it's one of those wacky things where you're like, you gotta be fucking kidding me. And it hits you differently than you think it. It happens. And I don't even know, maybe it wasn't. It could have been anything. But it's funny because everybody, especially when you work there, especially when you, you work there all day and all night. Like I was when I got there at 22 years old. The whole first year or so I was looking for one and hoping to see one, you know, I'm not stoned every night, looking around the corners, feeling creeped out. I'd be the one that shut off the lights in the rooms and you'd be looking and you didn't see anything. And then one day, middle of the damn day, sun blazing, it's like 1 2, 3pm Somewhere in there. And I took a break from the phones to go smoke a cigarette. So you have to walk like down a hall and through the dark belly room because all those lights are off during the day. And when I broke the pathway into the belly room, there was just a weird feeling that happened. And then this human height looking jellyfish, like vibrating, kind of see through, but like it's kind of, I don't even know how to describe, kind of jellyfish esque. Just this weird blob.

[Bill Maher]

A ghost.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. It certainly seemed like beating around the bush. I know, I know. It drives me crazy.

[Bill Maher]

If it happened to Abbott and Costello, I believe if it happened to the Bowery Boys, it could happen to anybody.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Here's the crazy part of the story is I didn't tell anybody. You ready for this? This is where shit gets weird. I didn't tell anybody at all because I didn't want anybody thinking, oh, to high or nuts or almost passed out or whatever. No, no, not at that time.

[Bill Maher]

Even if you were, I gotta say. And this wouldn't hold up in court. But you know, the truth is different than what holds up in court. The truth is. I don't know. Yes, I guess when I was 19 and I got high for the first few months and it was just almost an out of body experience. But I've been smoking for 50 years. I could be high.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exactly.

[Bill Maher]

And I still don't see ghosts or I'm not close. I wish I could get that high.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Same. I mean, 22 years of smoking pot every day.

[Bill Maher]

So if you say, even if you were high, I still don't think it would make you see a ghost. I mean, it doesn't make us hallucinate.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exactly, exactly.

[Bill Maher]

So how long were you there in the room with the ghost?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I'd say probably five to 10 seconds. And you froze or you froze and then I walked away. You would think you would run, right? But you don't feel.

[Bill Maher]

You don't stay there the whole time. It didn't go first.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It didn't go first.

[Bill Maher]

Well, I think that says something about the ghost.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It looked like it was. There wasn't like a face to it or anything, but it looked like the way it moved. It seemed like it was surprised to see me as I was to see it.

[Bill Maher]

I'm sure. Well, yeah, I'm sure it was. I mean, no, it's not gonna have a face. It's not Robert Downey. It's not a rom com, it's a gh. But the Belly Room, which you referenced there, by the way, that's for people who don't know the Comedy Store. It has three rooms, but the main room, which is like the big room. And then the original room, which is a smaller room, but also, you know, the same comics play it. It's all good comedy. And then the upstairs, the Belly room, which was the room for women comics. So what's the ghost doing hanging out in the women's locker room?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exact. So I walk away and I don't tell anybody. This is where shit gets crazy. Is later that night. The house piano player of 35 years, or whatever Jeff Scott is. We always had a tradition where right before we opened the doors. Cause I would switch from being a phone Guy to the front door guy. At 7:30 or whatever, we'd set up the chairs. He would set up his piano, his keyboard and everything and get the room right. Then we'd have the room, right? And then we'd go smoke a bowl. We'd come back to the original room and open the doors and I'd see people and he'd be playing the fucking ragtime on the piano. So this is where things get interesting. The exact same day that I saw whatever the hell I saw. We're going to smoke. He's walking ahead of me. He walks through the bar. We're going to the back to Sacred ground, that little alleyway. He's. He gets ahead of me because I'm saying hi to a waitress in the bar area. And then by the time I'm almost to that door, he's walking by me now this direction like he had seen a ghost. And I go, jeff, what? Where are you going? We're smoking. He goes, whoa. And he snaps out of it and he goes, dude, I just saw something crazy. I go, what did you see? And I'm fucking tripping in my head because I literally am going, please don't fucking say a white, kind of blobby, jellyfish looking thing.

[Bill Maher]

Well, actually, it's better if it's just one.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Ghost. Yeah. Was it.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It was.

[Bill Maher]

So it was the same ghost?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Same exact thing, except this time it was outside and it moved. How he said that my thing moved, which is kind of like.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, yeah. I mean, look, the other thing it could be is an alien. I mean, again, I get the inclination to go, oh, please. That people might be thinking or that we might be thinking about ourselves. But I'm sorry, like I say, I've just heard this from too many times from people, and there's just nothing wrong with saying, I don't fucking know. And the alien theory, also, there's nothing unscientific about the possibility that there is other life in the universe or that such life has been monitoring us, or that such life is already among us. I always say everything that happens in movies that happens in real life. You know the premise of. What's the big one where they're Will Smith and Men in Black?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yes.

[Bill Maher]

Men in Black. Yeah. You know, it's not like that. But could it be? Yes. Why wouldn't it be? And it's. The problem with talking about this stuff is that especially with someone like you who is. I don't know if you should tell me. I'm very curious. Your reputation now is a Right. Is as a right winger because you did the Trump rally and told the Puerto Rico joke, which is a great joke, you know.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, it was in the mix. It's a whole fucking conundrum. You would love, you would love to know the story because you would really understand it from a comedian's perspective. Like I'm going there to kind of, you know, to, to, to do this thing about how, you know, free speech this and that and make those kinds of jokes. But I had a whole thing written and planned, you know, to go into the teleprompter and, and that Puerto Rico joke was actually a joke that I had done a bunch in my stand up and it's part of a bigger joke with more front end and a longer back end. And like what, I'm curious. Well, it was. It, you know, basically, basically at the end of the normal joke I go, you know, I'm talking about the problems in the world.

[Bill Maher]

Right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

And I go, and I don't know if you guys know this, but there's a floating island of garbage in the middle of the ocean right now. Yeah. I think it's called Puerto Rico.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

And the point of the joke is that people picture obviously in my mind, obviously, the great Pacific garbage.

[Bill Maher]

It's the classic misdirection. Yes.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Which I'm obsessed with, by the way. I can't believe nobody ever talks about the fact that there's an island of plastic as big as.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, I do.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

On my show.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It's wild, right?

[Bill Maher]

Oh, I did a whole fucking thing in the fucking.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It's in the fish, it's in our sushi, which means it's in us.

[Bill Maher]

I've said it here. Also, if there's anything that's going to get us, they could possibly fix a lot of the air pollution because there are new strategies and technologies that are coming online. I can't describe them to you, but basically ways to clean up, you know. But the ocean, no, they don't have that at all. And they don't have a way apparently to get off plastic that you could sell to the people. I think they die before they gave it up. And they don't have a way to get it out of us. Really. That one worries me more than air pollution, more than anything is plastic.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yep.

[Bill Maher]

But no, there's no doubt it's insulting to Puerto Ricans. But you know, I have been over the same territory. I mean, I don't think I would do exactly that joke, but I certainly have done many that have been objected to and my thing was always, you know, what everybody has to accept in the framework of comedy insults. We just, you know, and they're never fair. When we do a joke about the French surrendering, they did surrender, you know, to the Nazi. It's not like they are really more cowardly than anybody else. They planned badly and they built something called the Maginot Line to keep out the Nazis after World War I, but they forgot to build it all the way to the ocean. So the Nazis just went around. Wasn't cowardice, it was stupidity. Polish people are not especially dumber than anybody else, but they got that supermodels don't always throw up. But, you know, we, and that's the thing is like the jokes, are they fair? They're not. And we all just kind of have to suck it up for the sake of comedy. That, that would be my defense.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I totally agree. Luckily the Puerto Ricans and I knew this going into it, and I knew it at the last second when I was doing it at 2:30 in the afternoon, which was another terrible problem. If there's one thing I was.

[Bill Maher]

That was in the afternoon, that rally.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Well, it was supposed, it started in the afternoon and it was supposed to go to the evening. When I got there, I go, when am I going up in this thing? And they go, you're up first. Can you imagine?

[Bill Maher]

Oh, you opened. You open for the Trump ride.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I went up after the goddamn national anthem.

[Bill Maher]

But did you do it because you're a supporter of Trump or just because it's opportunity in a paycheck? Was it a paycheck?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No, it wasn't a paycheck. I did it literally to hopefully, you know, get some. Hopefully if only 10,000, not to mention 100,000, maybe 200 if we're lucky, actual people to vote for him.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, so you did want people to vote for Trump.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yes, without a doubt.

[Bill Maher]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I think he gets a weird, weird, weird rap in this world, man. And you know, we're going to have.

[Bill Maher]

To break off on that point. Lets face it, after a night with drinks, I don't bounce back the next day like I used to. And I hate to waste a day. So I had to make a choice. I can either have a great night or a great next day. That is until I found pre alcohol zbiotics. Pre alcohol probiotic drink is the world's first genetically engineered probiotic. I kept hearing about pre alcohol and wondered what it was actually like. Now I get why everyone's talking about it. And with their GMO technology, Zbiotics is continuing to invent probiotics that will help with everyday challenges of modern living. Zebiotics Pre Alcohol Probiotic Drink is the world's first genetically engineered probiotic. It was invented by PhD scientists to tackle rough mornings after drinking. Here's how it when you drink, alcohol gets converted into a toxic byproduct in the gut. It's this byproduct, not dehydration, that's to blame for your rough next day. Pre alcohol produces an enzyme to break this byproduct down. Just remember to make Pre alcohol your first drink of the night. Drink responsibly and you'll feel your best tomorrow. Spring is here, which means more opportunities.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

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[Bill Maher]

One before drinking and wake up feeling great the next day. Go to zebiotics.com random to learn more and get 15% off your first order when you use Random at checkout. Zebiotics is backed with 100% money back guarantee, so if you're unsatisfied for any reason, they'll refund your money, no questions asked. Remember to head to zbiotics.com random and use the code random at checkout for 15% off. Club Random is brought to you by the audio marketing gurus at Radioactive Media. Amidst all of the current chaos, what are you going to do as a business owner or CMO to take steps to ensure your business survives and thrives during these economically shaky times? Why not utilize something stable for your marketing efforts? By tapping into the power of podcast and radio, audio marketing can make your brand stand out above your competitors and it's more cost effective than social media alone. My friends at Radioactive Media know the recipe to launch, optimize and scale performance by building compelling audio campaigns which work for advertisers who want to reach the right audience with the right hosts and programs. You need to speak with Radioactive media text random to 511-511- they believe in the power of audio so much they even use it themselves right here, right now. Go to Radioactive Media.com or text the word random to 511-511. Discover how audio marketing can surpass your current strategies with new and innovative ways that sound better. Go to RadioactiveMedia.com or text random to 511-511-Text random to 511511 today. Message and Data rates may apply. No, no, I'm, you know, you know my thing. I talk to everybody. Yeah and it's okay. That we disagree on that. I. I just didn't really know until this moment that that's. I thought maybe you just were doing it for a gig and because you believe in free speech. But a Trumper. But, you know, I mean, I always say you can be against Trump and not hate half the people in the country who like him. And, I mean, you can't write them off. This is the controversy I just went through when I had dinner with them. And to some, you know, the very kind of woke people who always hated me for, because they're so woke. And, you know, I just have no patience for those people. And, you know, I do think I won that one because, you know, I mean, people understand, especially since I went right back to my job of doing what I've always done, which is criticizing him as much as I did before. It's not like I was taken in by him, but I was gonna be honest. And also, I think it's great to have an open dialogue, no matter who it is. And it's just so pointlessly illogical to think, as the Democrats, some of them do, that if you have no power, which they have, you lost everything. You fucking lost everything. And now you're also not gonna talk to the people who have. And Trump is the kind of guy. I knew this even before I went there, but I certainly was confirmed. He's the kind of guy who everything is personal relationships, much more than, say, a guy like Obama who was very logical and all business and, like, I don't think anybody felt like they were really close to Obama. Personal, maybe like Valerie Jarrett or some people around him, but like, not other politicians. He wanted to be friendly with everybody. But that's not like, this guy's different. He comes from real estate and he comes from business in New York. So the idea that you think you're going to do better by screaming, running out of the room, I'm not talking to you, is just so bizarre to me.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. Who did he do that to?

[Bill Maher]

What?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I didn't see that. Who did he do that to?

[Bill Maher]

Do what?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

To run out of the room saying, I'm not going to talk to you.

[Bill Maher]

They're saying that to him about him. The people who are criticizing me.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

You're exactly right. And I find that to be the.

[Bill Maher]

People who say, how could he have gone to the dinner? Gone to the dinner. It's dinner at the White House. How could you not?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exactly.

[Bill Maher]

It's. Again, it would be different if I came out wearing the red hat. It's like, okay, somehow this succubus put his snake tongue down my throat and now I'm. But that's not what happened. And they just can't quite give it up, some of them.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, I think that is a quality that is across the boards, to the far left. They are absolutists in the way of. If you show any, any respect to the President of the United States, and let's not forget he's also a former President of the United States. So it was a guy that, like, you know, when I was going in to do that, that rally, the goal, you know, it wasn't just to swing a few, you know, thousand votes, hopefully, of whatever, whoever listens to my podcast or whoever liked my silly performance on the Tom Brady Roast or whatever. It was also to fucking have the President go. That was cool. Thanks, man. That's awesome. I liked your set. You got the crowd going, which, by the way, I did. Of course, that room isn't mic'd for the comedy show. No, he didn't. I didn't get to talk to him that day.

[Bill Maher]

Tony, you must feel so bad about that. You go and you're for him and you're working for him and you like him. And me, nothing but vitriol for 10 years. And I get the invite.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Isn't it wild?

[Bill Maher]

But I said this when I did the piece on it, when I got back, the best moment to me was when I brought in a list of 56 different insults he has said about me. Had it printed on a piece of paper and he signed it and it's on my wall.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

So cool.

[Bill Maher]

And it will always be one of the coolest artifacts in the. And it's. It's just, you know, it's. But here's my question that I'm fascinated about because, like, certain. I don't. I don't. I want to know if the comic community is different than the actorly community. Because the actorly community, the actors in this town, I won't mention any names. And there are certain. I'm sure there are people who deviate, but generally it is the epicenter of wokeness. And, you know, I love show people, but I always say I'm in show business. I'm not really of it. There is a difference.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And they just, you know, they're full on in, let's say.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, yeah.

[Bill Maher]

On everything. So if you deviate from there, it's hard to find your place. Place at a dinner. You know, no one would invite you out. I mean, you know, the right wing types, even the Clint Eastwood Who's a Republican, but not that far right. I mean, because he's Clint Eastwood, you know, I'm sure people would still have him over, but there's just. I mean, they are just very clubby about the politics.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

What I want to know is, does that pertain in the comedy world, like, because you're a Trumper. I'm sure most of the comics are not. Do they treat you differently? Are you in any way ostracized because of that?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

So here's what happened is I moved to Texas during the pandemic when they triple closed everything in California and there was no indoor shows. And I went and did a show outdoors at the Magic Castle, performing to people in cars, where the cars had to be six feet apart from one another. Swear to fucking cars are gonna give.

[Bill Maher]

It to each other. That was a terrible disease.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, Bill. And they gave people these clapper things, these little New Year's Eve noisemaker, shaky things.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, I thought you honk your horn when you like it.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I'm surprised they actually didn't think of that. But they gave people these noisemakers and they would hold them out their windows and it would go clack, clack, clack, clack, clack.

[Bill Maher]

The car has a noisemaker built into it that sounds like a H. It's called the horn.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. It's crazy.

[Bill Maher]

Even still, I mean, funny, I. For six months, when the horrible forever flu happened, I did the monologue right over there. We had this room was all. The pool table was gone, everything. This was the studio where I did that. Then I did the editorial out there sitting on the lawn. I mean, we did the show here for six months. You know, some ways it made you more creative and. But it was to do a monologue here. I wanted to keep the show as close to what it really was. I put on a suit and tie like I always had. And we had funny, you know, cutaways to old audiences laughing, which was. People loved that bit. And we had a laugh track. You know, I would do the joke here and then they would play. And I got through it. But I used to just walk out of after that taping. And of course, I live, you know, next door. So I'd walk home and it'd be like, I'm so depressed. Like. Cause usually after the show, there's a little party and blah, blah. And then I was just like in the silence of my house and, oh, yes, we can't go out and all. And it was just like. And look, there are diseases in the world that I think might merit that that are that dangerous. I just never thought it was that one.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exactly. 100% with you. So not only was I doing these stupid outdoor shows, but just like you were saying, I have a. I'm the only person I think that I know that has a weekly live show in front of a live audience for 12 years, every single week.

[Bill Maher]

Right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

So what we had to do, because we do. I do a show where I pull a comedian's name out of the bucket. They do a minute of stand up, and I interview them.

[Bill Maher]

I see it.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

So he ended up. Oh, you want to talk about depressing? We ended up having people send in their minute sets. They're in their living room trying to do standup comedy. We had no laugh track, no recorded audience sound. So we're watching people do their sets, and then we would zoom with them for the interview part. So how's it going? Well, not much of anything happening. Just been in my house playing video. Every interview was the same. Everything was the same for 6, 6, 8, whatever months during this thing. We had no live audiences whatsoever. Especially when you're used to that every single week, like I'm sure you were. It's just you go through the craziest withdrawals. So when I went and visited Texas and they fucking have them indoors and the place is packed and there's no separation, I'm like, what the hell? And I.

[Bill Maher]

My dad, I had the same experience going to Florida. The first set I did when they let us, and it was like, oh, my God, this is. I remember what freedom felt like.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exactly. And the day I joke you not. And this is the thing, because I would argue that we're more center than left or right. I think you'd probably be shocked to know how I. At least from my perception, centrist, we are. I've been watching you for my whole life, by the way. My mom always made sure we had hbo, even though I was raised poor. So I kind of get you. And it's crazy that I'm considered a right winger or. And. Or that Rogan is. Or that Elon is. And these.

[Bill Maher]

Well, anybody. I'm sorry, but anybody who is a Trumper is just. It's a different. It's a. It's a different mindset that, you know, you. He'd have to be extremely different to me to get me over there.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right?

[Bill Maher]

And he knows that. I mean, a lot of this stuff is just way too insane and too far out there. And again, talking about a third term. This stuff is just intolerable.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I think he's goofing around when he talks. I think he knows how to joke a lot.

[Bill Maher]

That was my editorial two weeks ago. Like once it starts out as a joke and it's not a joke at.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

A certain point he's not gonna go for a third term.

[Bill Maher]

Well now he finally said he's not going to, but.

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[Bill Maher]

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[Bill Maher]

I mean, he, we. The night I was there, he was talking about it with me. He was, he said to me, well, you know, I know how you feel about it, so you know, we don't have to argue, but the ways you could do it. And I said, no, there are not. And you know, that's what. They got mad at me that I was honest about the fact that he just. You can have a conversation with them like that and it doesn't explode into like he is some kind of Jekyll and Hyde. Because if you did that during a press conference, he'd be. You're a disgusting person.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Well, yeah, I can.

[Bill Maher]

And he would just go into that other guy and that guy just, you know, and they're so mad at me for like pointing this out. Like, I'm just pointing it out. You do without what you will, right? I'm just pointing it out. I'm not, I'm not saying it. I'm not even giving an opinion on it really. I'm just saying that that's what my line was. I went into the. Went down into the mine. This is what I found down there. Now you make your judgment what you want to do with that.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. Yeah. I find it all so interesting. It's wild you said Doge was a disaster. What do you mean by that?

[Bill Maher]

He said we're gonna save $2 trillion. By their best accounting, it's a miniscule percentage of the budget, like 150 billion. And it didn't even work. The budget, the deficit, it's all worse than ever. They're at some point gonna have to deal with that. What we pay on interest on the debt now is the second highest thing we spend money on. The only other thing we spend more money on is Social Security. It's more than Medicare. It's more than defense. It's a trillion dollars just to service the debt, just to give banks money for loaning us money. And how long can. And they're not making it better. He's not fixing that. Look, it's a wild superpower. His superpower is that he can turn on a dime and change his policy on anything. And because it's a cult, they will just follow him. So tomorrow, he could change any of these policies. And he's done it a million times with people. He throws them out, invites them back in. I love you. You're the greatest. You're the wor. Terrible person. And, you know, so do I love that kind of unpredictability. No, but the possibility that even if it's a slim one, that he could, you know, say, you know what Republicans need to tax the rich. I ran on helping the common man, and I'm going to do it. I don't think he's going to do it if they never do do it, but he could do it. I mean, this is a guy who just last week said, kids, you don't need 30 dolls. I'm Donny. Two dolls. Two fucking dolls. By the way, what kid even plays with dolls anymore? And then he says, pencils. Pencils. I can't remember the last decade. I had a. I even owned a pencil.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

A pencil?

[Bill Maher]

For what? But, like, you don't need 30 pencils. You need five. You need two dolls and five pencils. I mean, and I cannot imagine another political leader being able to get away with telling people, fuck you. You think you're middle class, you're the working poor with a house full of crap. That's what you are. And you don't need all that crap. But, you know, when you got the cult leader status, boy, I mean, it is amazing what you can get away with.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I think a lot of people look at it as a tactic, kind of. For example, when he came in the first time and guns ablaze and tough on immigration, build A wall, build a wall, build a wall, build a wall. And people don't want to come in this time. He's flying people back to places and. And all this. I think he knows that he's publicly doing things to kind of lower the bar of people that are willing to illegally immigrate, things like that. For an example. He knows what he's kind of publicly doing to play.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, well, what he's doing is working as far as stopping people from coming in. If you ask me, it's not worth the price. It's not worth the price of suspending the Constitution of the United States, which says you can't just take people off the street and put them in a foreign prison. That is just insane. But if the message is, you know what, you always had a free ride if you. If you thought you could come here, the worst that was going to happen is, oh, all bets are off, go back, no, you didn't make it. That's the worst that could happen. Probably you're just gonna stay here. His message is, well, no, if you come here and we catch you, it might be worse for you. And, you know, that is a deterrent and it is working, the number of people, you know, I think, yeah, every action has a reaction. Like, Biden went so, so stupidly far toward a pretty much come one, come all, just walk right in policy.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And they have to own that to a degree. Again, I do not support what Trump is doing, but I get where it comes from. Action, reaction. If you go that far. Almost to your point, you were asking me a minute ago about who's more right or left. Like, if you go that far left, what do you expect you are gonna get? People who come in and go that far right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

So in a way. And if you don't win the election, that's what's gonna happen.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

So Democrats have a lot of looking in the mirror to do.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No doubt. I find it all very interesting and moving. Like I was saying. Oh. So let's just go back to the question.

[Bill Maher]

But nobody shuns you.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I was just gonna get to that, which is, you know, since I moved to Texas.

[Bill Maher]

Oh. Cause you're not in la, but you're in LA sometimes.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Sometimes. But what I've learned is that, especially after the rally, election debacle and everything.

[Bill Maher]

Right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Is that the farther left, even though they don't make it, their identity or maybe talk about it on stage or whatever, the farther left people, comedians, really, you know, they'll just talk on a podcast or they'll Pretend like, like, you know, me and Rogan and everybody in Austin's a bunch of Nazis and all they. You just have to agree with everything they say or you're not part of the club and all this crap. Meanwhile, again, you know, it's like we're all pot smoking pro choice. If you're going to call us far right crazy people, you have to realize we're all formerly registered Democrat voters. And so is Rogan, and so is Elon, and so is Trump. All these people are famously Democrats.

[Bill Maher]

Okay, but that's not where we are now. They're not Democrats now. And I understand why the Democratic Party gives them the heebie jeebies. That's different than being all in on Trump, which they are. But what. But see, I have to believe that the comic community is just better than the actor league community.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, without a doubt.

[Bill Maher]

Because our business is calling out bullshit. And so it's just harder to be so doctrinaire about your politics. It just is. I'm not saying that we didn't. Most of us comics didn't vote the Democratic Party. Yes, but there's just more of a. If you're gonna really do what we do and we do what we do best and call shit out and keep it real, which is what gets the good laughs, the good nutritious laughs, the cheap laughs, you're going to be. You're going to be having to call out some stuff on the left, even if it's not, you know, specifically political.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

It's just the leftist kind of thinking and that kind of stuff, because they are as crazy in their own way. They're just not as dangerous.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right. You mean the, the left is.

[Bill Maher]

The left is not as dangerous because they still believe.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I would say that they are. That's.

[Bill Maher]

I know.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Because it seems like the right wingers are the ones with the guns and this and that, and we'll take it feels that way. But I mean, all of a sudden, the last couple of years, I'm looking at who the mass shooters are and this and that, and it is crinkling.

[Bill Maher]

I'm talking about our way of life, which is governed by the type of government we have. And they are still constitutionalist and institutionalists. Now, have they nibbled at the edges? Yes. Have they invited, as always, like we were saying with the other thing, there's always an invited backlash when you go too far. So, you know, did Joe Biden do things that were imperial presidency things? Yes, of course he did. He said in his own words something like, you know, well, The Supreme Court said I couldn't give student loans, but I'll find a way. You know, okay, that's not nearly what Trump is doing, but it invites that kind of argument from the right, which says, you know what? They all do it. And by. Yeah, you know what? That's the problem. If you move a little bit here, Trump's gonna go, oh, well, I'll king me. I'll just jump over you and go 10 steps further and worse. And so that's where we are. But, yeah, I don't think they are equally dangerous because one side really would like an autocracy. They really don't want to have to deal with. With the left wing at all. They think the left wing is such an existential threat to our way of life that it would actually be better to be an autocracy than to be a democracy where they might win. And I would be very surprised if the next election is one that will just go smoothly. It only goes smoothly, like the last one, when they win. When they win, it goes smoothly. When they lose, it's a shit show because they don't accept election results. Nothing is more important to me than that. You have to accept election results. That's the basis of everything.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

And they're not there.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. You give. No. You have no thoughts about the fact that perhaps because, you know, it was a lockdown and everything, that. And, you know, extra viewers, you know, like, from the. From both sides could be in the voting areas and stuff.

[Bill Maher]

You know, you're still saying the 2020 election was not fair because even his own security team said it was fair.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I get it.

[Bill Maher]

A lot of Republicans have. I mean, that's a. That's a dead horse that you got to stop.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No, I, I'm. I'm not saying that. I'm not. I'm not saying that I think that. But there were a lot of votes that. That didn't vote this year, and those votes were for the. For the left.

[Bill Maher]

Well, he lost. He ran three times. He lost one and won two. That's pretty good. And you just gotta be, you know, just be cool about it. I used to do a bit in my act about, you know. You ever watch the end of a football game?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Mm.

[Bill Maher]

Okay, what happens? These coaches, these coaches whose whole life is football, they have no life except for Bill Belichick, who's fucking a 24 year old. He changed it up completely. And I give him all the props in the world, but otherwise, coaches have no life. So when they lose the game, it's like the worst thing in the world. But what do they do? They put on a face and they walk across the field and they stick out their hand and they said, good game, Andy. Good luck next week against the Pack. Yeah, that's what a man does. Yeah, that's. You don't say, I never lost. I could never lose. And you know, until they get their head wrapped around that. But it doesn't even matter. I'm much more concerned about what's gonna happen in 2028.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And you know, look, it could very well be he does step aside and that he lets Vance and Rubio fight it out. Cause it looks like he's setting them up to be the two heirs.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And then they run against Pete Buttigieg or whoever. And lots of things could happen there. And Vance or whoever could be the next and absolutely could happen. Or what could happen is that Buttigieg wins and they just don't accept it. And that I can't accept.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I think it's a very Trump esque thing, specifically him to not want to acknowledge or admit a loss. I wouldn't say that's.

[Bill Maher]

That's possible.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I wouldn't say that that is possible. Yeah. I wouldn't say that that's a trait.

[Bill Maher]

And it's also possible that Trump ism. That's part of it. And his crowd wouldn't accept. I mean, look, Mike Pence is like Persona non grata in the Republican Party.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Because he did the right thing.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. He's a doofus, though. I mean, I agree with whatever.

[Bill Maher]

We did the right thing.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

The right thing by admitting that, you know, the election results were. The election results. They were right. But Pence is a doofus. Maximus. And my point is, is you think.

[Bill Maher]

I like Mike Pence, right?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Of course.

[Bill Maher]

No, but. But like J.D.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Vance.

[Bill Maher]

But I do like Mike Pence. I mean, even though he's like the last guy I would had have over here to club random. To like have a.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

That would really make it random. You'd have to go all caps on random.

[Bill Maher]

I would love to sit here and smoke and blow pot smoke in Mike Pence's face. That would be awesome. But you know, you know that he won't. He's so religious that he won't. What is it that he won't do? He won't be in a room with a woman who isn't his wife unless the wife is there too. Oh.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, that's a psycho. Oh, that's a guy that can't control himself. That's wild.

[Bill Maher]

Well, as if he needs, you know, the security of his wife there. Otherwise, I mean, these chicks would be up on Mike Pence's job. You know, they'd be like blowing him on the dance floor. Are you kidding?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

No, Yeah, I mean, that's who Mike Pence is. Mike Pence, he's a Christian super duper. I mean that was always what he was. He was the governor of Indiana and, you know, very conservative state. Conservative guy, white hair. I always said he looks like the, he looks like the pilot in the airline video they show before.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Have you gotten to meet J.D. vance?

[Bill Maher]

No, never met J.D.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I gotta tell you, all that I know about him is that this guy's a badass. Because when my stuff was going down that week, Trump wasn't. He was kind of off rallies. He was off. He was just laying low for a bit and JD Vance was taking the questions. He was out there kind of doing little rallies and taking questions from the people and every single day and trust me, I was watching like a hawk. And we get sent the clips or whatever of whatever just happened. They would ask them, what do you think about the racist comments? Right from the comment from the speaker. They were calling me everything but a comedian. They could not say the word comedian, which, which I think really, I think.

[Bill Maher]

It really backfired that, that, that would piss me off.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

And when I was at the inauguration and everything, trust me, they were all high fiving me and kissing, of course, at the inauguration. But they look at it like it was a massive part them, they look at me doing what I did and accidentally. Right. It couldn't have been planned, accidentally being the news for nine goddamn days during an election.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, stop pretending you don't love it. But it put you on a different level.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It definitely did.

[Bill Maher]

Just don't try to sell me that this, you're suffering from this.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

But during the. Not at all. But during the time, it was very stressful.

[Bill Maher]

You know, just like my thing with the dinner was. It was stressful. But you know what? I didn't mind it because it was like, you know what? First of all, most of the people I'm hearing from are like, thank God for you and what you're doing. Even the liberals, you know, it's like they got it. And also it's, it, you know, it just, it's. I'd rather, you know, I'd rather live on. When is this die standing than live on my knees?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Absolutely.

[Bill Maher]

Just like, you know, it's what one of the great compensating things about being a comedian is that, that's what we do get to do, is to speak our mind. And very few people have that luxury. I mean, God, talk to a publicist for any star, you know, they can't, they don't want them to say anything. Anything. Because anything is potentially. I mean, Justin Timberlake once apologized for complimenting a black singer. I can't remember who it was. It was a cultural appropriation. It's like, I'm so sorry, I'll do better.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

What's the problem?

[Bill Maher]

You say you like Otis Reddy. Whatever the fuck it was, it was so ridiculous. So public is like, just don't speak. Just don't speak. And you see it on talk shows, you know, like they play games with them, like, let's play tiddlywinks. And if you lose, I throw water in your face. Great. I don't have to say what I think about Gaza.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

You know, and we do.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And you know, there is somewhat of a price to pay sometimes and you could fall off the ledge, you know.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

But I don't know, the, the ability to speak your mind. Priceless.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Absolutely, absolutely. And I rode that wave. But my point is, is J.D. vance, that entire week he was, he was taking these questions from the press like that, what are your thoughts about the racist comments? And he would nail it every time, day after day.

[Bill Maher]

What do you say?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

First of all, it's a comedian. I don't know why you're calling him a speaker. He was a comedian defending free speech. And where has our sense of humor gone?

[Bill Maher]

Right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

How do you not know that was a joke? That's a clearly a joke. Maybe it wasn't the right time or place. Maybe I'm not even saying, like he was just taking the questions like he was a comedian. Like he understood the perspective of the mission. And so if you ever. And common sense, if you ever get.

[Bill Maher]

A gig where you're playing to a left wing crowd, I have a way you could do this joke and slightly change it and it would still work. But think of some island where like only like rich white people go. So, you know, there's an. A floating island of garbage. It's called the Bahamas. It's called Cayman Islands.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

You will be perfect. Lifted out on their shoulders.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I am actually doing an entirely left wing audience tonight.

[Bill Maher]

What?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, because I'm performing at the Comedy Store here in la.

[Bill Maher]

And will you be greeted by any sort of backlashy, sort of like, oh, he's on tonight. Or will they be like, he's a comic and that trumps trump they won't.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Know until I'm up there because I'm a secret, unannounced pop in. But I will feel it from 20% of the room, assuredly. The, the, the, the good people, the girlfriends of the excited. The excited boyfriend's gonna be like that. And there's, there's always a few just angry, right? They can't wait to show me.

[Bill Maher]

That's funny.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

They can't hide there.

[Bill Maher]

I, when I, I stopped doing the road last year. But like I. For so many years, I would see somebody in the front row and it was inder who was like this, arms folded like stone face. And it was just invariably the husband of a woman who loved me, you know, liberal woman loved me and dragged the husband. And I, like, I let it go for as long as I could in the show. And then I would just talk to the guy and I would just point out, I know you're the big tough guy, you're the conservative, you're the tough people. And yet you let your wife drag you to a show you didn't want to go to.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I do the exact same thing and reverse it. And I go, and I go. And here you are stuck watching me because you were too insecure to let your man go out tonight without you because you think he'll somebody else. And one day he will.

[Bill Maher]

No, I got a better way to make him feel worse.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

You're so worried your man is going to go out and somebody else. Nobody wants to your man. You can stop worrying, sweetheart. This is not an issue that's going to come up. Oh, he'll flirt, but no one will take him up on the offer. So let him go. Let him fly Free bird.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It's fun when you see those people out there. It makes me. When I'm performing. And I'll see it and I'll ignore it, and I'll see it and I'll ignore it and I'll keep going. And the whole time I'll glance back, right Then I bet you would too, in the. When you, when, when it happens to you. And you're trying to break them, right. You're trying to see maybe this one will get them, right, the angry face person to break. And we don't fight if you get them to break, which happens a lot.

[Bill Maher]

Yes.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

You know, because eventually they can't help themselves. Right.

[Bill Maher]

That's the great thing about comedy.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

And even now, right, I'm kind of leaning into this whole you think I'm a racist thing, but I'm just obsessed with different Cultures. I love stereotypes. This is kind of the theme of Currently. The stuff that I'm working on is I'm actually leaning farther into this type of thing where I'm saying what I love about America is that we can all laugh at each other. Like black people do, that this. And Asians are bad at this. And so now I'm really going for it. And it's so funny because they'll hold strong on the things that affect them, of course, but then all of a sudden you're into something that doesn't affect them, or they don't have an Asian friend, or they don't have a black friend, or they don't have a this, and you find the thing that they agree with and they crack and they do. People that try to have a bad time, people that try to not get comedy or, or find something purposefully find something unfunny, those are the most rewarding ones to get that laugh from.

[Bill Maher]

Well, I got great advice when I started when I was complaining about a shitty crowd once and a great comedian said to me, that's why they're here, because they're not in a good mood. They came here for the medicine of laughter. And you're the doctor saying, what the fuck are you doing in my office when you're sick? Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

That's interesting.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, that's why I'm in your office. Cause I'm sick and I need what you can heal me with. So why are you mad at me? Wow.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Do you remember who told you that?

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, I didn't want to say because it sounds like name dropping.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Okay, who was it?

[Bill Maher]

Abraham Lincoln. So tonight you're going on the Comedy Store?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, we're gonna do some secret pop ins tonight and tomorrow and wow. Doing an arena in Anaheim on fly.

[Bill Maher]

You got a big thing going on. Yeah, it's fun, right?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It really is. It's. It's a blast, man. 18 or actually 17 years ago, I was sleeping in the back seat of my car behind the Comedy Store. I used park up on the hill, work my shifts that I was telling you about, and then you'd walk up the hill because I didn't even have the right to park in that little parking lot yet. So I'd walk up the hill, go get my car, pull it down, and then pull it all the way behind the Comedy Store, get in the back seat, sleep in the fetal position, wake up at 7, 8am or whatever, go shower in the main room, green room, and then go work the phones again. Trying to write jokes.

[Bill Maher]

You're so lucky that you had that experience, because everything that comes after is you're able to enjoy it because it wasn't handed to you. If it's handed to you, you can't ever really enjoy. I'm so glad I'm not a Nepo baby. I mean, I know Nepo babies, they're not any worse than us. They're not. But they're also not, you know. You know, it's just. Stop telling. It's like trans women and biological women. Stop telling me with the same thing.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

They're not a bad thing. But just tell me we're the exact same thing, because it just is easier to be a Nepo baby in this business. This business. First of all, if you're a Internet outlet, a magazine, any place, anything with publicity, what do you want to cover more? Joe Schmo or Big Star's Child, which is a better story.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

How's Johnny Depp's kid doing? How's Bob Schmohawk's kid doing?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

You know, and I'm not picking on her, and she's a fine actress, and they're all good and blah, blah. Very often they're very good because it is in their blood, just the way athletes, which is completely different because you actually have to be good. Good. But a lot of kids who are fathers were pro players are good because they hung around the stadium. So by the time they get to the stadium, it's not like, oh, my God, I'm in the stadium. It's like, yeah, I grew up here. What's the big deal?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. And dad taught me how to hit.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Dad was Rod Carew. Yeah. Or whoever, you know.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. Where I grew up in Youngstown, Ohio, a very, very, at the time, dangerous.

[Bill Maher]

But the most dangerous neighborhood in America is Appalachia.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Where's that? What do you mean? The city, the place.

[Bill Maher]

It's not a city.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. Like in the mountains. What do you mean?

[Bill Maher]

Jesus. Didn't you go to high school?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Appalachia is a region of the country. I think it stretches across eight different states. It's where the hillbillies live. It's. You ever see Winter's Bone? No. You should.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

You'll love it, being a hillbilly.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Check it out.

[Bill Maher]

It's Jennifer Lawrence's first movie. It's an indie movie, but it's about Appalachia, which is. I mean, it goes through Tennessee, West Virginia, Kentucky. Coal Miner's Daughter. Have you heard of that? Rhett or Lynn Butcher's Holler. A holler What's a holler? It's a place where people live. Like, it's like a ghetto for rednecks. Okay. That's the most dangerous place.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Because, you know, like, they don't take to revenuers in there and government people and, like, they got their own law and their own shit going on in there. And, like, really, law enforcement doesn't not to mess with these people. I mean, they mess much more with the inner city than they mess with Appalachia, you know, and, like, Winter's Bone, just an amazing movie, does not have a false note in it. And I say that as someone who would not know what a false note was.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Because I'm very far from Appalachia, and yet I somehow know it doesn't.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

You're where you see, you're originally from New Jersey, and then you came straight here.

[Bill Maher]

Not straight here. I mean, I went to college in upstate New York and then went after college, went to New York City, which is where the comedy clubs were. You know, the Comedy Store was certainly out here, but I wasn't ready for out here. Because that's where you went after you were ready to do Johnny Carson.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

So, you know, there were three clubs. The three big clubs were the Improv, Catch a Rising Star, and the Comedy Store. There was also then the Comedy Cellar, which I know is still thriving. So, you know, you did as many sets as you could every night. On the weekends, you could do six. You could do three in the early show and three in the late show. You were always running to a cab to get you downtown, so you could go run in right off the street, sweating to do your show at the Comedy Cellar. It was crazy.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

That's how Austin is now.

[Bill Maher]

What?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

There's.

[Bill Maher]

Austin has that much of a comedy scene.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Dude, there's eight comedy clubs within, like, a few blocks of each other. So it's not even cabs and rush. You can literally walk it. You can tell the person there, I got this.

[Bill Maher]

So Rogan has one. That must be the Rogan has Granddaddy Club, right?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. And it has two rooms.

[Bill Maher]

Oh.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

With two shows a night. So that's. You could do four shows at that one club alone.

[Bill Maher]

Holy.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And you do.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, sometimes.

[Bill Maher]

Really? Still.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Oh.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

If I have. Even. Even if it's only just one joke or one line that I'm really excited about, I'll do a whole set just to be able to figure out where to slide that in.

[Bill Maher]

I feel like. Really, when I really felt like I was good was when I made the Decree to my agent or whoever was doing this. I will never do more than one show a night.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

You know, because sometimes they offer that, like, oh, we can sell two shows.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

Sorry. I always hated a second show. When you're doing the same jokes.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

I got bored of my act.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Fact.

[Bill Maher]

Just doing one show a night. If I. Even just over the weekend.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

I. One reason I. 1. Well, I'm saying it's a reason I stopped doing it. But one thing I will not miss about the road is I would basically go every other weekend out and I would. It was such an easy thing. I'd take up my own plane. I'd go to Cincinnati or wherever, do a show Friday night, stay over in that city, fly to the next city the next day, do the show and fly right home. I was only out of my bed one night. It was the cushiest way to do a show. I still really didn't like the fact that on the first night, my act wasn't enough in my head, so I wasn't saying it as good as I possibly could.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Totally.

[Bill Maher]

And the second night, I was bored with it.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

There was like, no middle.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. Yeah. No, you're spot on. That's exactly. Exactly how I feel. And yeah, they try to. They. I. I'm at an. I'm at an interesting place now because it was always forever. It was comedy clubs. Two shows on Friday, two shows on Saturday. And it was.

[Bill Maher]

Did you ever repeat the same joke in the. Oh, of course.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, Are you kidding me? Oh, you mean. Oh, you mean in the second show thinking that you.

[Bill Maher]

Or not thinking you hadn't done it in that show.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Honestly. And I can't believe I haven't. This is an unbelievable fun fact, is that I haven't. There has been two, three, four times all time. And I'm talking about hundreds of road sets in which I've gone. I didn't already do that, did I? Or have I? Or in this setup, have I.

[Bill Maher]

You said that out loud, right?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, well, you. Which is basically because they would not laugh the second time, Right?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exactly.

[Bill Maher]

And then they would look at you like, you fraud.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

But then again, I also. There's also a part of me when I'm on the setup and they're kind of giggling, and I'm wondering if I already did.

[Bill Maher]

It's the. Because it's like the two orbs of your brain. The one half is saying, no, this is the logical half. I know I didn't do this joke because we're going by this order this is why we're doing it in this order. And the other half of your brain is going, I think we did this in the show.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

And you're wondering. I'm wondering if they're laughing because I did it and they think I'm doing it again in order to just be funny. Right.

[Bill Maher]

No, I did it once. They don't laugh.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

They look at you like you're an. Which you are.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

And again, I smoke a lot of marijuana. And so you just don't know.

[Bill Maher]

Well, that's why you, you know, when you do more than one show, you have to have a specific order. You can't. You. You don't have the freedom to. Around.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Like, I love the idea. I always loved in stand Up. The idea of I have a structure, sure. But I can, like, go away from it. But then I always come back to it. You know, it's like being out in space on one of those spacewalks. And it's great out here in space and. But because they're going to pull you in. Unless a space storm happens, like it does in every movie where they do it. They get marooned out there.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

But then Sandra Bullock somehow winds up back on Earth.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

I mean, that was amazing. Right?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Terrible ending.

[Bill Maher]

Really?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, because.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

But, but it's funny you mentioned that because literally, I had my weekly, bi weekly talk with my agents today, and they're like, and yeah, we'll be doing these shows before you get ready for your special taping in a few months. So here's what we're gonna do, and if these sell good, we'll add another show. And I go, no, no, no, no, no.

[Bill Maher]

Good for you.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

We're not doing another show. I go, I know you guys want me to do another show. Getting tested 10%.

[Bill Maher]

Right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Sitting on your same ass that you would back at home looking at the ocean waves.

[Bill Maher]

Right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

But I'm the one that has to do the goddamn show. There's no chance.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

And so I, And I literally. What's funny is I literally. This was only two hours ago, I literally said, I think I burnt out all my stem cells in my body doing all those grinding shows when I was younger because I just find it so exhausting. And I. It's also, also, there's just more energy. I don't think there's been a scientific study on what we do at all, really. But I think the higher the expectations of the crowd. Right. That watches you every week, that's going, I don't ever go out, but I bought A ticket for this. I worked. I worked an extra shift this week to get this right. And you feel that. You feel that it's not. It's not the old days where.

[Bill Maher]

I love that.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

I mean, I love, love if. If I had to summarize what I loved the most about doing stand up on the road, it's. They want me to do something that they feel only I can do for them.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

And then I do it for them. Yeah, that's it.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yep.

[Bill Maher]

Because there's so many choices. I'm not. I'm not saying they never buy a ticket to another comedian, but there are a. You know, a limited number of. You know, most people don't go to a lot of comedy shows in a year.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

So you probably. You're one of their one or two or three favorite comics. So, like, you obviously do something that tickles them in a way that others don't.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And they want to get that from you. And I. And I love being the hero.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

I love delivering.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yep.

[Bill Maher]

And that's, I think, what I miss most about the road.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

But I. I was very surprised this year, being home all the time. I don't miss it, like, because people don't understand it's such a maintenance factor to have an act. I mean, I had my show. I don't even count this podcast because I do zero preparation for this. Obviously. I just show up and get high, which is great. Which is a whole different thing. But an act you need to maintain.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

I compare it to playing the cello. You can't just pick it up three weeks after you didn't play it. It's an everyday kind of. It's a mistress, and you gotta feed her. And, you know, if you're Bill Belichick, give her all the deeds to your property.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I've been defending Bill Belichick in the green room of the mothership, sweetheart.

[Bill Maher]

I am Bill Belichick. Belichick. I'm Bill Belichick without the. Without the nine super bowl rings.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. People in the green room have been talking shit about him going, this girl's running his hole. Everything. I go, what are you guys. First of all, you don't know what you're talking about. Second of all, it's proof that they were in the Right. That the camera was pointed at her. Strangely during this interview.

[Bill Maher]

Strangely. Right, right, right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

They knew what the. They were doing. I go, we're. We're here in Texas. We hate the mainstream media. And meanwhile, we're going, oh, man. CBS expose. The fact that Belichick's being controlled. When have we ever agreed? When have we ever not thought they were up to something shady? And then I said, what was up with that reverse camera shot right on her. And then they started to like, oh, okay. But it's so true, man. It's like everyone wants to. To see. I call it my Game of Thrones theory. When Game of Thrones came out and became the biggest show in the world back in the day, I think people started a thing in their heads where they wanted to see kings fall because they were once every couple few weeks or months or whatever. On that show, you were watching a new person gain the Iron Throne or this or that, and we want to build them up.

[Bill Maher]

Really? That's what happened on that show.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Show. You didn't watch it?

[Bill Maher]

I should have. I'm sure. I watched the first season.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh.

[Bill Maher]

And then I watched the last season.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, that's an interesting little sandwich.

[Bill Maher]

You know what my problem is? Dragons. I'm not a fantasy guy. Like, I'm a. I'm a. I was a history major.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

So the history part of it, the part that looked like an actual medieval kingdom, I loved. And I could tell you about medieval kingdoms till you fell asleep.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

I really could.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It wouldn't take long.

[Bill Maher]

I know. So that I like. But like, once you bring in the dragons, I'm kind of like, I just can't hang with dragons.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I'm with you 100%. Only they have been able to do it correctly for me.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, I liked the last season. I mean, it was. And I especially appreciated the last episode, which was a tribute to Shakespeare Lost on the critics, I must say.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

100. That's another thing I get in arguments about all the time. I defend that last season of Game of Thrones to the tooth and nail.

[Bill Maher]

Well, you know, it was, et tu, Brute? I mean, you know, you have to kill tyrants is what Shakespeare was saying in Julius Caesar. And it was very that. And I just don't think the modern audience gave a shit about any of that. It was like, does the handsome guy get the. The blonde English chick? You know, I mean, I don't know, but it was. Look, I'm always thrilled when HBO has a huge hit because it only helps me totally. You know, the show ends. And so. And don't forget this week on real time, 100% Bill Morris.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Some fucking.

[Bill Maher]

Fucking egghead that. That, like.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I'll say it again, I was raised super poor, but somehow my mom always made sure. I think it's. Cause my dad used to Visit once in a while to watch boxing matches. Because Boom Boom Mancini, a famous old boxer.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, sure.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

From Youngstown and so.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, he was from Youngstown.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

So I think she only did it so that he would hang out sometimes once in a great while.

[Bill Maher]

But when you say very poor, what are you talking about? Were you eating Cheez? Its from a dog bowl.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Not a. Not that poor. That would. I mean, first of all, Cheez its aren't the cheapest thing I know. You might not know you've been making it.

[Bill Maher]

No, when I was poor, I was very poor. I was very poor from 18 to 27. Like college. I mean, I didn't think of it as poor because we were at college. But like, when I look back, like, are you kidding? I lived in fucking slums. They were slums. Ithaca, New York was like Appalachia, by the way. Appalachia. Even though it's not officially part of Appalachia. Yeah, I think in New York, if you take away Cornell University, it's Appalachia. It's like fucking hillbillies. Very rural, very out in the country. Very Trump country. I'm not equating the two necessarily.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Okay, but you know, being a Trumper isn't what you're calling a Trumper. Isn't that crazy? I mean, he did win the popular vote boat.

[Bill Maher]

That doesn't mean it's not crazy. That does not there. Those two things are not okay.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

That's fine. Look, you. You've been talking to me for what, an hour and a half? Do I seem like a guy who hates you because you.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No. And I'm the same.

[Bill Maher]

And I never will.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

That's why I think you're.

[Bill Maher]

Believe it or not, whatever you're going to say, I am.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I think you're.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, I am. Yeah, I am. I'm center left.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I am too. Believe it or not, I am.

[Bill Maher]

Well. Well, I am center left. To me, a Trumper is far right. There are old school Republicans. They are hiding right now, but they do exist. That's center right. Trump is different. But we already went over that.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

What were you just talking about? It was so interesting to me.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Damn it. What was it?

[Bill Maher]

Oh, I'm the one smoking.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I had HBO when I was younger.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, yeah. So you were poor. Like, tell me what constitutes poor for you. And then I'm gonna tell you what constitutes poor for me. Me, because I have poor when I was in Ithaca, poor when I moved to New York City. Really poor. It wasn't until I moved here where I had the cheapest apartment you could get because. But because it was California, your standard of living was so much higher. There was a bird outside your window instead of a bus.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Mic drop.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

California.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. Mike.

[Bill Maher]

Mine.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Mine was. Mine was a different. I was a different kind of poor when I first moved here, which was fucking looking for goddamn nickels and quarters on the ground and picking up every job I could. And there was even a period.

[Bill Maher]

How often do you find a nickel on the ground?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Back then it was more often because they actually used coins back then.

[Bill Maher]

It's like pencils.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I know, exactly.

[Bill Maher]

Pencils, nickels.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

But yeah, I was raised pretty poor. My mom made sure that I went to. Believe it or not, it's imposs to sound poor while saying that you went to the private school in town. But I did go to the private school in town. She forced my dad, who was. They were never married. They were in separate things. It's a whole crazy ass story. But. But she made sure that my dad contributed enough by getting her work running numbers, being a bookie in town.

[Bill Maher]

Really?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. So that she was able to put me through a private school, make sure that I always had a decent pair of shoes and hbo. So it's the wildest thing.

[Bill Maher]

All you need, that's all shoes and hbo.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I swear to God, those were the two things I had that all my buddies had.

[Bill Maher]

It's not tv, it's footwear.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

That's right. But, man, it was a game changer for me. The comedy specials, absolutely 100% controlled, was the best.

[Bill Maher]

Have you seen my last one?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, I'm not gonna watch yours till you watch mine.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Okay.

[Bill Maher]

Why didn't you watch my last one?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I don't watch anybody's specials. I like seeing them live.

[Bill Maher]

I can relate to that.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I see enough people live to where I can relate to. I like ways.

[Bill Maher]

But you would like my life.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, I'm positive I would. I've been again, I've been. I'm not kissing your ass. I've been a fan forever. I mean, you know, all my initial politics and everything of anything about politics was through you.

[Bill Maher]

I don't want to like, pat myself on the back and say, no one else could do this. But I do want to ask the question, why can't anyone else do this? I just don't see that many say that many people like just talking to somebody else who, yes, may be a trumper and just not seeing them as this monster who you can't talk to.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

I mean, and I'm not going to convince you, and you're not going to convince me. And we just accept that.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And I know what their answer is, which is like, how can you. These people are doing A, B, and C, and I'm like, you know what? I can't disagree with that. I don't agree with A, B, and C, especially if A is disappearing people and B is not listening to judges and blah, blah, blah. But, okay, we tried the. We're superior to you. You're deplorable. We're not talking to you. In fact, we can't have dinner with you because you're so dep. We tried that method. We tried the. I'm in the Oval Office, but I'm putting the folders in front of my face because I can't be seen with this person. I can't. I'm like, they'll never guess where we are. Right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Crazy.

[Bill Maher]

The gold won't give it away.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Crazy.

[Bill Maher]

We tried that, and maybe that has very little success. My method has a very little success, but that one has zero.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. No doubt about it.

[Bill Maher]

That one has zero chance of success. And again, like, these people, I feel like your people, they feel very slighted. They feel like they were called deplorables. You don't want to even have dinner with us.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I mean, there's no question about it. The mainstream media, which was, you know, obviously very defensive of the left, really did it to themselves. I mean, calling people Nazis. People calling me a speaker when you.

[Bill Maher]

Know damn well I'm a nyri. David said I'm a Nazi.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

He did?

[Bill Maher]

Well, he said I had dinner with Hitler.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, to how. And by the way, and I think literally when we say we do it to themselves, how dare anyone call Trump Hitler? That is such an insult to the Jewish people.

[Bill Maher]

That's exactly what I said when I did an interview about it. That it's like, among other things. First of all, as soon as you play the Hitler card, you've kind of lost the argument. Unless you're really dealing with Hitler, which, yes, we're not. But agreed, like, it is quite insulting to. To the ones that Hitler. I mean, Hitler. I keep calling him the goat of evil. He's the goat.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, yeah.

[Bill Maher]

You know, you can't. Don't try to, you know, don't answer that conversation like, who was better than Michael Jordan? Okay, it's Hitler. All right. Hitler's Michael Jordan.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Of evil.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

All right. LeBron's great. Great. It's different.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Six rings.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Six million people dead. And you know, it's just like. Stop it.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yep. There's different eras of it. Genghis Khan was the Wilt Chamberlain.

[Bill Maher]

Genghis Khan. I don't think people give Genghis Khan enough credit for as much of a mass murderer as he was. And also a mass spreader of semen. They estimate that something like 11% of people may have gang of like in Eurasia, may have Genghis Khan blood. Yes, absolutely. He made up for all the people he mercilessly killed by fucking endlessly and impregnating so many people. So, you know, I mean, you gotta balance the good with the bad. I mean, either the sperm sample cup is half full or it's half empty. And I like to think it's half full.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, that guy did a lot of. Oh, a lot of.

[Bill Maher]

Well, that's medieval history. I loved the. Yeah. I mean, would you like to hear about Genghis Khan and the, you know, more? Oh, of course.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Tell us more.

[Bill Maher]

Well, I mean, go.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

You have any more?

[Bill Maher]

I mean, this is. Yes. Oh, you want pot?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. Why?

[Bill Maher]

Just say so. I'm sorry, bro. You're smoking cigarettes? I thought that was your jam.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I do. I do both.

[Bill Maher]

Okay.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Thank you.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I got a lighter.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, okay. So. Well, Genghis Khan from Mongolia, conquered both east and west. He. He got all the way to a. A city that. I can't remember the name, but it's currently Beijing. That, and then went all the way almost to the Roman Empire, but stopped. I mean, they conquered Baghdad. I mean, wherever they conquered, they were very, very tolerant of different ways of being in different religions. What they were not tolerant of was any sort of objection to being subjected to Mongol rule, then they would just fucking kill everybody. But if you were like, okay, we're part of the Mongol Empire, they were actually very tolerant. But nobody was more merciless or more successful for a long time. The reason they were stopped is because their warriors, which were the fiercest in history, they were raised on the grass steppes of Central Asia. And horses, horseback, they ran out of grass for the horses in their conquering swath. And once they couldn't get enough grass for their horses to feed, they couldn't fight. And once they couldn't fight, they couldn't keep conquering. Conquering.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Wow.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. So they never, like, got to Rome.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

If they did, the conclave that was going on right now would be very different.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. You know what I always found interesting? Oh, that's good. About Genghis Khan was, you know, when they buried him, I'm sure you know about this because it's so fascinating. When they buried him, the people that buried him got killed. Killed by people. Right. And the people that killed those people got killed by people. Yes, yeah.

[Bill Maher]

Yes, that's exactly what they did.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

They wouldn't know where he was buried.

[Bill Maher]

Right. This is the part of the podcast where people are going, I guess the pot kicked in. Wait, they're talking about Genghis Khan now? What happened to the Comedy Store and Trump? Now we're on to Genghis Khan is killing everybody.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It is kicking in.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, but know you, you know what people will say because we were talking about ghosts, honestly, is that I guarantee this is already writing. They're already writing this and it hasn't aired yet. Well, see, he's a Trumper, believes in conspiracy theorists theories. Okay, so they're going to compare this to like, Hillary ran a pedophile ring out of a pizza piece. Now, Tony, you don't really believe Hillary did run a. Okay, good. Because a lot of Trumpers do. See, this is why people have some reason to be suspicious.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

That's the farthest extreme of those.

[Bill Maher]

It's not a.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Of the Trump side of things.

[Bill Maher]

Really? What percentage of people who voted for Donald Trump or in the, let's put it this way, what percentage of people in the administration? You don't think. People like Pete HEGSETH and Linda McMahon and, I don't know, some of these people, Pam Bondi, you don't think they believe in things like that? I mean, Bobby Kennedy came out for chemtrails the other day. Did you see that?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No, I didn't see that.

[Bill Maher]

And I like Bobby Kennedy. And he sat right there. Yeah, but chemtrails.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, it's an, it's, it's a, it's an interesting one. You know, the, the.

[Bill Maher]

Not hard for you? Well, hard for me.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I just don't. You know, how the story was told was so much.

[Bill Maher]

I'm gonna get you invited. You. You. I can't believe they. By the way, I can handle this with. Well, really any number of phone calls right now. But since you're so true blue, you should definitely get the like, White House treatment. And he'll show you the whole fucking White House, let me tell you.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, I love it.

[Bill Maher]

He likes showing off the White House. And I don't blame him. Of course, I don't blame him for a second.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I saw Kid Rock's White House a few weeks ago. Have you heard of this?

[Bill Maher]

What's up? That.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, my God, he's got The Southern White House. He mimicked his house. It's literally a southern version of the White House. You ever visit Nashville?

[Bill Maher]

Of course. Well, I played it.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Next time you go, if you.

[Bill Maher]

If you happen the Ryman, don't you play the R?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

One always was one of my favorite stops.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, my God. It's. It's. It's one of the very few perfect venues in the world. I think a great on you, but I just did the. This a few weeks ago. I did my podcast in the Bridgestone arena two nights in a row, and Kid Rock was a guest on one of them with another comedian.

[Bill Maher]

And on the show.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. And it was a lot of fun. And we ended up going back to his place. Actually, we were there the. A couple nights before. Anyway, he modeled his house after the White House. Like, it's built like the White House with secret doors and chambers and elevators and all this diabolical shit, and it is so fucking cool. He waited years. He lived in a trailer on the property for years, just scoping it out, seeing which way the water flowed and all of these different things. He's such an interesting, classy, somehow classy fucking guy.

[Bill Maher]

I love him. Yeah. We became friends and like, I know.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

So much fun.

[Bill Maher]

I know the left wing hates that. And you go yourselves. I will walk into a room with the devil if I want to. You'd go, yeah, but. And again, these another perfect example of a guy who, like, we don't agree, but, you know, that's okay. And it's funny that people have said to me recently, like, are you mad at Kid Rock because he took. I said mad at him. No, I'm thankful that he extended the invitation. I'd do it again. Not again again. Because I did it once. I don't make it happen here. Okay. But no, mad at. The only thing I'm mad at him about is that he convinced me to get that shitty Bobby Darren album I got.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Oh, you did?

[Bill Maher]

Oh, my God, it's so terrible. And he convinced me it was like, the greatest thing in the world.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Damn.

[Bill Maher]

And you had to, like, order it on. I mean, it wasn't like, on itunes. You had to, like, actually get the physical cd. Cd.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

The cd, yeah. Wow.

[Bill Maher]

Some record Bobby Darren made. Like. Like he was trying to be a hippie. Like, after his splish splash, I was taking a bath.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah. That's interesting.

[Bill Maher]

I don't know why you like, but. No, I mean, you gotta. You got to accept. Yeah, that's. That's one of the things I've really come to appreciate about these last couple of decades in my life that I didn't get when I was younger. Acceptance. It's everything. Everything is acceptance.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I would almost argue that it is a quality of. And again, I'm not a very political guy. I consider myself a centrist. But I would almost argue that it's becoming acceptance and that type of invitational, let's break bread. Energy somehow is becoming slightly a more quality of the right. And, and, and that's why them being called a racist. That's where they're. That's where everybody really up. Because, sure, Appalachia, I get it. Correct. But I live in the middle, smack dab middle of Texas, granted, in the more liberal part of Austin, Texas. But I get out a lot and I Golf out 45 minutes that way or that way or that way, and I'll. And I'll, you know, go hunting that way and that way. There's all these different parts. And those people, if a black person walked up to their goddamn door, they would be, in my opinion, a lot of them, a thousand times nicer than a suspicious, wacky liberal that's not used to welcoming people in or being a good neighbor.

[Bill Maher]

But that's near Austin.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Sure. I'm also just talking about the road. I'm still out there.

[Bill Maher]

I mean, honestly, both things exist in America. And I would say, first of all, when I say accepting, I mean accepting of someone's personality. I don't mean accepting of their political policies. So don't anybody write in and say, bill Maher said he should accept Trump. No, I don't accept Trump's bad policies. Policies. I accept humans. On the other thing, there was a story maybe a couple of years ago of some black person walking up to some white guy's door for a very innocent reason, and the guy just shot him some old fuck. And my answer to this is always, these people do exist in America, but they're my age. And, and it's not a growth industry. Racism. It's just not those people. They do exist. They do still exist in America. Or just the person. I know people of color who've said, I went into this store in the panhandle in Florida and I just got a harsh. That happens. A harsh look from someone just because your skin is browner. That absolutely does exist. But I also have been more on the page of trying to get my mostly liberal audience to understand you're not doing yourself any favors by pretending that America isn't a very, very different place than it was 10, 20, 30 years ago, 50 it's night and day. Different than 50 years ago.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exactly. I had someone tell me once that it's never been worse. I'm like, what do you mean it's never been worse?

[Bill Maher]

I brought that up in an editorial.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Slavery used to exist.

[Bill Maher]

I said that in an editorial, quoting Kevin Hart, who said something about never been worse. And then he, you know, I said, worse than, like 100 years ago when we had that. When they bombed the shit out of. What was that city in Oklahoma where they had this. They just destroyed the entire city.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Tulsa.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, Tulsa. The Tulsa race bombing. Worse than when Diana Ross and, you know, Willie Mays couldn't stay at the same hotel and he fired back about, like, oh, we should be thankful that we're in the. No, I'm not saying you should be thankful.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Right.

[Bill Maher]

That's not the point. And, you know, it's not the point. I'm saying things are different. And to say everything that things are worse than ever is just delusional.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

And it's not. And it's the kind of irresponsibility of, you know, know. And I love Kevin Hart, but that's a. When people say things like that to where it's absolute. Right. Things have never been worse. That's dangerous. With great power comes great responsibility. LeBron James put out a Instagram post that went super ballistic the week of my. And the video started with me and it edited out a whole. The beginning, the part of the setup, and basically the end.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, of course, we all have. But I mean, it's just. I really hate that that kind of thing is what makes me say to that wing of the party, yep, I'm an ally until you lie. When you lie, then I can't be your ally. And I just fucking hate a lie. Just tell me what you think or what's the truth? Just don't fucking lie to me.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Exactly.

[Bill Maher]

I'm just like an abused woman. He's been lying to me. So much lying. If you just don't lie to me. But it really is true. Like women. It's like, if people want to know, like, the main thing to do to not piss off a woman, just don't lie. It's almost always the lying that'll get you.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Totally. Totally. I learned that.

[Bill Maher]

Are you married?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No.

[Bill Maher]

Never been married?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No. Well, I was married for a short period of time.

[Bill Maher]

What do you mean? Yeah, it's like, oh, yeah, that's right.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No, I'm high As. But I was married for a couple.

[Bill Maher]

Years and I forgot marriage. I'm not sure about I'm not married now. Now I'm not sure about the ghost again. All right, now the ghost is very much in suspicion.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No, I've been married.

[Bill Maher]

I'm not married. You were married?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, just for a couple years. It was fun. It's a good little run. Met a girl who I. We were. We couldn't separate at all for a week or two. We were having so much damn fun. She is from. Originally from Australia. And so she goes, my visa's up in a. In a liquid, so. And I'm literally like, let's. It wasn't even like. I mean, I have no regrets. We're still extremely, like, best friends to this day. I'm the godfather to her stunning little son.

[Bill Maher]

Oh.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

And we're happy. She actually. She'll be coming.

[Bill Maher]

So you don't think she used you to get.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Not at all. It was literally my idea. I know what it looks like. I mean, it was. And we had a, you know, it was a blast.

[Bill Maher]

Looks like we should send her to prison in El Salvador. It looks like to me. An immigrant who took advantage of an American, and we should probably deport without trial. That's what it looks like to me, my friend.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

She's an American now, thank God.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah. Because of you. Right. Well, I mean, once you marry them, they're good to go, right? Even if they get divorced. It's not like they divorced the country.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I don't even know the rules. I just know they weren't gonna.

[Bill Maher]

So why did it peter out?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Well, at the time.

[Bill Maher]

You got tired of the sexual intercourse.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No, no, it wasn't that. It was just. It just kind of. Usually it's that she, you know, there was some addiction issues. Issues.

[Bill Maher]

Sexual intercourse?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

No.

[Bill Maher]

Oh, yeah.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Well, I mean, she was. Sex was fine. Everything was good in that department.

[Bill Maher]

But this was fine. Now it's got to be better than fine. It was great.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It was 10 years ago.

[Bill Maher]

Yeah, it's great. A minute ago. I mean, it'll be stupid.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Ex wife. Have you ever been married?

[Bill Maher]

Let's see. I'm very high, so I don't. I'm not. I'm gonna wait and think about it. No, I never married. No. I, I, I have one of the proudest achievements in my life.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Anyone?

[Bill Maher]

Not because I think marriage is bad, just because I think it would have been bad for me.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

So the fact that I was able to stick to my guns.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And not, you know, walk down the aisle and, and of course, the more you listen to people who are married or were married, I mean, God, I just read that Michelle Obama. Michelle Obama, this is. Said that she hated. I hated my husband for 10 years when the kids were little. Who says that? I just don't understand that.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

And. And then she said, but, you know, we've been together 30, so, you know, 10 bad ones. I think that's pretty good. I don't like, I'm not on that page. That. Oh, one decade of misery. Yeah, I could do that standing on my head. You know, they're like a mobster going on. I can do 10, please. Yeah, it's cray, right?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I would never do it again. It was.

[Bill Maher]

You would never do it again.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

It was a one time thing. Yeah, I know myself well now.

[Bill Maher]

And what did you learn?

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Well, well, now things have just changed. You know, it was then, it was a best friendship kind of, you know, while obviously hooking up. And now I'm just kind of as corny as it sounds. I just like my independence and I really, really have found a way to be super comfortable, you know, by myself.

[Bill Maher]

Doesn't sound corny to me.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, yeah. Some people lose their minds to go, but don't you wanna. But don't you wanna. And it's like, don't you wanna.

[Bill Maher]

Like, don't you wanna.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah, don't you wanna do what I. Let's take a look at our nights.

[Bill Maher]

That should definitely be. Be a song. Yeah, don't you wanna.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Should be on that Bobby Darin album.

[Bill Maher]

No, it should be on Dua Lipa's album or Charlie C X to the Z, whatever her name is. I mean, don't you wanna. Because that you're so right. That like so sums up like what the argument is to people like us. From the usual don't you wanna. And. And my answer was always no, not really. Love means not what. How do you make me feel? It's like what's right for you. You know, if I love you being happy more than I love whatever you're giving to me, that's when you pass into the actual love stage as opposed to just. I mean, when I was younger it was just, I love you. No, I love what you do for me. Me, you know, I love how you make me feel. But that's about me. That's not love. And that's okay, but it's just not. It's something different.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

Yeah.

[Bill Maher]

So, all right, now that we've established that, I'm going to go to the end of the show.

[Tony Hinchcliff]

I hope I was good. I always get high on these things and don't know whether no.

[D]

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