Bone-In Salami Sliders (Jason Mantzoukas, Seth Morris, May Darmon, Owen Burke)

Summary

Comedy Bang Bang: "Bone-In Salami Sliders"

Released: September 29, 2025
Host: Scott Aukerman
Guests: Jason Mantzoukas, Seth Morris (as Bob Ducca/The Wolf), May Darmon, Owen Burke

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Overview

This episode showcases the classic Comedy Bang Bang chaotic energy, built upon effortless riffing, surreal improvisational character bits, and ahead-of-the-curve absurdity. Host Scott Aukerman welcomes returning favorite Jason Mantzoukas, the ever-ailing and list-making Bob Ducca (Seth Morris), foreign exchange student Prince Peter Streusel (May Darmon), and – from America’s heartland – an extremely folksy, possibly murderous new character, Queasy Jeans (Owen Burke). The conversations ricochet from running gags on father-son dynamics to cultural misunderstanding, podcast in-jokes, and totally deranged “slice of life” Americana, all capped by classic CBB plugs and musical themes.

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Key Discussion Points & Memorable Moments

Banter & Opening Riffs

• Scott & Jason banter about the show’s longevity and cryptic fate:
  • “Here we are, 2025. You remain the host.” (Jason, 02:50)
  • “For the past 16 plus years...” (Scott, 02:53)
  • “Could there be a coup? ...A bloodless coup, I hope.” (Jason/Scott, 02:55-03:00)
• Extended riff about social security numbers as words and emojis (02:13-02:37)
• “He was the first known E.T.” / “He wrote Entertainment Tonight. Mary Hart’s legs.” (Jason/Scott, 03:37-03:49)

Jason Mantzoukas’s Introduction

• Jason jokes about only having two names, and the secret “Rumplestiltskin” rule where if you guess his hidden middle name, he’ll “give you all his gold” (05:07-05:17).
• Recounting career highlights with robust improv detours:
  • “He’s the TikTok man in the John Wickaverse... TikTok, Mr. Wick.” (Scott, 05:36-05:40)

Classic Jason-Scott Back-and-Forth

• Autumn in Los Angeles banter, “the leaves have all changed colors here in Los Angeles” (Jason, 05:46), mocking LA’s seasons.
• A recurring riff about the impossibility of a bootlegged six-hour Prince documentary and a mythical six-hour Tom Cruise acting class (06:13-08:06).
  • “Tom Cruise told Glenn Powell...look at video of yourself running because you don’t look as cool as you think.” (Jason, 08:14-08:33)

Bob Ducca Arrives (Seth Morris)

• Introduced as Scott’s “ex-stepfather” (“married to my mother for six months,” 11:41-11:43).
• The duo bat around their complicated family boundaries, leading to a meta-reflection on adult friendships, “What an incredible relationship to be able to have a father-son dynamic that blossoms in adulthood into best friends…” (Jason, 12:21-12:28)
• Bob’s endless health and emotional woes:
  • "I recently went to Dave and Buster's and had a horrible, horrible experience." (Bob, 12:48)
  • He believed “contractors named Dave or Buster” could be found at Dave & Buster’s (13:04-13:22).
  • Led to an intricately deranged list of foods he ate there:
    • “Smash Burger Smoke Ass Ribs with Honey Glaze, Atari Sauce, Cheese Stick Stack Barbacoa Quesadilla Loaded Barbacoa Fries, Lee Iacocca Onion Rings… Bone in Salami Sliders… Breaded Elder Abuse Mozzarella Sticks…” (Bob, 17:58-20:08)
  • Culmination: “All of which left me feeling very, very ill.” (Bob, 20:08)
  • Surreal injury list caused by arcade games: “Human claw machine wedgie… Dance Dance Revolution meniscus tear… the Legend of Zika: Breath of the Wild; Tears of the Kidney Cysts… It’s-a-me, Mersa.” (Bob, 20:33-21:32)

Character Bits: "The Wolf" and FM Radio Parody

• Bob morphs into “the Wolf,” a hacky morning drive-time radio host (prompted by “you be... I'll be the Wolf. You're Scott Aukerman and the Wolf,” 23:55).
• Parody catchphrases and call-in jokes:
  • “Call in right now if you’ve ever been in that situation where your lady says, come buy tampons…” (The Wolf, 25:05)
  • Accompanied by riffs on Army surplus mash pads as makeshift tampons (24:32-24:47)

Foreign Exchange Segment: Peter Streusel (May Darmon)

• Introduced from Scott’s guest house: “I’ve been staying in Scott’s guest house.” (Peter, 32:00)
• CBB group attempts to deduce Peter’s country and background:
  • “Austria!” (Peter, 32:12)
• Bob proposes a “medical exchange program.” (33:31-33:42)
• Peter’s saga:
  • Alleged visa troubles, friendship with ICE agents, and brings up needing a “very serious transplant.” (34:59-36:04)
  • Hints that he’s possibly royalty, which is later revealed to be true: “I guess you got me. I’m pretty much a prince.” (Peter, 46:12-46:19)
  • Faux emotional story about his missing pet, first a cat (“Eddie”), then revealed to be a palace tiger named “Klaus” (47:08).
• Classic CBB confusion and multilingual confusion (corn, pumpkins, cat years).

From America’s Heartland: Queasy Jeans (Owen Burke)

• Introduced as “from America’s heartland,” real name “Quesadella, which is quesadilla…” (Queasy, 59:33-59:40) and uses “Queasy Jeans” as her folksy alter-ego.
• Champions “folksy wisdom” over “experts,” delivers classic adages:
  • “Just because a corn cob can fit your butt doesn’t mean it belongs there.” (Queasy, 63:34-63:42)
• Her “advice” is half folksy, half suspiciously self-serving, with an undercurrent of possible criminality regarding her brother’s tractor “accident.” (67:01-84:20)
• Endless confusion over the gendered nature of “quesadilla,” and the sexual implications thereof (70:15-70:35).
• Maintains she is not a murderer: “Just because he died and I don’t have an aliba doesn’t mean…” (Queasy, 73:16-73:20)

The Wolf’s Domestic Woes (Recurring FM Parody)

• Continues posing hacky radio call-in premises about marriage and grilling:
  • “Give a call if your wife has ever just said, hey, you’re going to a friend’s house, and she’s like, that’s what you’re wearing…” (The Wolf, 48:56)
  • Claims a wife named “Glare,” possibly Bob Ducca's alternate universe spouse (56:36).
  • Extended bits about Big Green Eggs, brisket vs. ribs, and hosting priorities (54:45-55:14).

Surrealist Details & Group Riff Highlights

• CBB’s running love for surreal lists:
  • Bob’s menu disasters and ailments (20:08, 21:32)
  • Peter’s escalating story about being a prince, his tiger, and his regal wardrobe (46:04-48:20)
• Hyper-specific pop culture riffs:
  • Taskmaster, Tom Cruise’s running, Michael Caine impressions
  • Jokes about Band Bane, TikTok, Club Random podcast, and Walton Goggins’ “Goggins Goggles” (71:50)
  • American and Austrian "pumpkin" and "corn" confusion

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• “All of which left me feeling very, very ill.” – Bob Ducca, post-Dave & Busters, (20:08)
• “Human claw machine wedgie, Dance Dance Revolution meniscus tear… It’s a-me, Mersa.” – Bob Ducca, (21:38)
• “Just because a corn cob can fit your butt doesn’t mean it belongs there.” – Queasy Jeans, (63:34)
• “I have an Ozempic sniper. They don’t tell me when it’s coming.” – The Wolf, (38:40)
• “I guess you got me. I’m pretty much a prince.” – Peter Streusel, (46:12)
• “You have servants. Servants. We don’t like to call them servants anymore. Or the master bedroom.” – Scott, on Peter’s royal entourage, (48:39)
• “Just because someone says a lie doesn’t mean it’s not… not true.” – Queasy Jeans, (89:57-90:03)
• “I recently went to Dave and Buster’s and had a horrible, horrible experience.” – Bob Ducca, (12:48)
• “My wife’s name is Glare.” – The Wolf, (56:35)
• “This is the Wolf. If you like that joke, give us call in right now.” – The Wolf, (71:12)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Opening Scott & Jason Banter/Emojis/Social Security: 02:00 - 03:31
• Bob Ducca arrives: 11:29
• Dave & Buster's surreal food list: 17:58 - 20:08
• Physical maladies from the arcade: 20:33 - 21:32
• The Wolf “Morning FM DJ” persona emerges: 23:55
• Foreign Exchange Student Peter Streusel’s entrance: 31:16
• Peter’s royalty revelation: 46:12
• Queasy Jeans (America’s Heartland) joins: 58:52
• Queasy’s “folksy wisdom” (corn cob adage): 63:34
• The Wolf discusses marriage/glare/alternate reality: 54:45, 56:36
• Plug section (“Plugberg” theme): 81:28

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Tone & Style

The episode’s tone is loose, improvisational, and delightfully absurdist. Rapid-fire character changes, meta-commentary, and escalating bits abound. Each guest adds comedic texture: Jason’s hyper-literate asides, Bob’s never-ending lists and maladies, Peter’s escalating backstory, and Queasy’s homespun wisdom mask increasingly suspicious behavior. Scott deftly orchestrates, playing both straight man and provocateur, and the interjections move at a breakneck but natural-feeling pace.

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Takeaway

This episode is an archetype of Comedy Bang Bang’s signature mayhem: a playful jumble of running jokes, surreal “slice of America” characters, wrenching lists, podcast in-jokes, and improvisational brilliance. Even if you miss in-the-moment callbacks, the joy is in the infectious commitment to each bit, from Dave & Buster’s invented maladies to pop-up radio morning show parodies, Marta-from-Ozempic sniping, and genuine pathos hidden beneath the nonsense. Lifetime fans will be delighted, and newcomers will find it a crash course in CBB’s unique, ever-evolving brand of podcast comedy.

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Quick Links

• Comedy Bang Bang World for episodes, themes, and plugs.
• Taskmaster on YouTube
• How Did This Get Made Tour Info
• Solar Opposites on Hulu/Netflix

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Summary prepared in the spirit and language of Comedy Bang Bang’s participants.

Transcript

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[B]

We know who's on first and what's on second, but my wife and I saw you from across the bar and would love for you to be our third.

[C]

Oh.

[B]

Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang, Polly, baby. Thank you to Quinn the Basin Bennett for that catchphrase submission. Love your nickname, the Basin. Yeah. What do you think that's about?

[C]

Wow. I wonder if it's like the Basin Street Blues or if it's like sort of repensitory to wash it to pee into. Okay. I was going to say to like wash your clothes in or something.

[B]

I was thinking like a bed pan kind of situation.

[C]

Okay, then why not like the bedpan then? Yes. What's the person's name?

[B]

Quinn the Bedp Bennett.

[C]

Quinn the Bedpan Bennett. Your name. Your nickname is officially changed. Change all of your logins. Change your passwords.

[B]

Change your Social Security number.

[C]

Probably possible, yes, because I'm sure they had already changed it to the Basin.

[B]

Can you change your Social Security number to a word? Yeah, to a word.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

With. Can you get any symbols in there?

[C]

Oh, yeah, yeah. You have to now include a couple of symbols and uppercase and lowercase.

[B]

Yeah. Maybe a heart emoji.

[C]

You know, Definitely, definitely. You can. You can choose from, like, six different emojis.

[B]

You do the panting emoji.

[C]

It's heart. It's dancing lady in red dress. It's EG. It is 100.

[B]

Yellow thumb up.

[C]

Yellow thumb up. And the Greek flag.

[B]

Oh, wow.

[C]

Oh, the Greek flag, which is great for me.

[B]

Yeah. Fantastic. Hey, welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another week. My name is Scott Aukerman. I'm the host of Comedy Bang Bang. Coming up a little later on the show.

[C]

So Far. You're the host up until this point.

[B]

That may change.

[C]

Here we are, 2025. You remain the host.

[B]

For the past 16 plus years, I've been.

[C]

Could there be a coup?

[B]

Sure. A bloodless coup, I hope.

[C]

Who knows? We know. You never know. They never say whether it was blood full or bloodless. A bloodful.

[B]

Bloodful coup.

[C]

There was a bloodful.

[B]

Hopefully that, hopefully that won't be you, though.

[C]

No, no, no. I would do it peacefully.

[B]

Yeah, I, I, I would, I hope, I would say something like etu. Jason or something, you know, something cool and classy.

[C]

I would love that.

[B]

You know, the immortal bard speak the speech as it comes trippingly off the tongue, etc.

[A]

Etc.

[C]

And, and he invented. Etc. Etc, Right?

[B]

He did, yeah. He was the first known recorded person.

[C]

I can't believe they had recordings then that we don't have.

[B]

He was the first known E.T.

[C]

He was the first known E.T.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

He wrote Entertainment Tonight. Mary Hart's legs.

[B]

Yeah. Remember those? She got him insured for a million dollars.

[C]

I think they were fake.

[B]

You think the legs were fake?

[C]

I think they were.

[B]

You think she's an Oscar Petori. What's his name? Petrorius.

[C]

I think they were an Oscar. Petro Patronus. I think. Yes. Expecto Patronum. I, I think they were an Oscar Patronus.

[D]

And, and it.

[B]

What if Harry Potter was there and just suddenly he was like, I got to imagine my Patronus.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

And then this guy with his fake legs, his big spear legs, comes over and just stabs and kills his girlfriend.

[C]

And shoots his girlfriend through the bed, through the bedroom door.

[B]

You know this person? I, I do want to say.

[C]

What are you, what are you gonna say?

[B]

Coming up a little later, we have a foreign exchange student on the show. We also have someone from America.

[C]

Wait, they let you keep participating in the foreign exchange program?

[B]

That's right. Yeah. Just people move in and out. So remember here at Comedy Bang Bang, we care. That's our tagline for 2025.

[C]

I love that.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Almost done wrapping it up.

[B]

Almost. Yeah. So, yeah, we're putting the big giant Christmas bow on the year.

[C]

Right. Because this is a Christian podcast. Everybody knows this is a Christmas.

[B]

Don't say a holiday bow, Jason.

[C]

Oh, I didn't. Yeah, I didn't. I doubled down on your Christmas bow.

[B]

Speaking of doubling down, he is a man with two names. He is.

[C]

And only two names. I have no middle name.

[B]

That's right. And if anyone. By the way, he does have a secret one. If you can guess it and you say it to him on the street, it's like a r. Give you all his gold.

[C]

It's a Rumple Stillin scenario.

[B]

Yep. And your baby back, baby back, baby.

[C]

Baby back, baby back, baby back.

[B]

You know him from such shows as Percy Jackson. The weird guy with the lightning stuff.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

You know him from one of the Star Trek things.

[C]

One of them. And watch them all and you'll figure it out. Of course.

[B]

He's the TikTok man in the John wickaverse.

[C]

Okay, TikTok. Mr. Wick.

[B]

Yes, that's right. Please welcome back to the show Jason Manzoukas.

[C]

Scotty, thrilled to be here.

[B]

Thrilled to have you on the show.

[C]

Welcome back. It is autumn 2025 and we are living the dream. The leaves have all changed colors here in Los Angeles.

[B]

You're drinking that pumpkin spice.

[A]

Life.

[C]

I don't. Wow. So loud. Everybody just reached for the knobs now.

[B]

We have a volume normalization on this. Not in your ear.

[C]

I listen to this podcast. You don't.

[B]

Oh, really?

[C]

No. You're screaming constantly. Here we are in the fall and.

[B]

I'm in my paisley crib.

[C]

I'm here to enjoy Victoria crib. Okay.

[B]

Oh, I don't serve ribs.

[C]

Okay, here's a real question, and I will answer your question before. But what I really want to know is how can we see the six hour Prince documentary? That's family. Nine. Okay, then rather than nine. Oh, that. You're right, it is nine. Yeah, because that was the argument they used. If anyone has a filmmaker made nine.

[B]

There'S one guy who sends. Who sends me all this bootleg stuff all the time.

[D]

Really?

[B]

Yeah, he has his own podcast. He's a fellow podcast.

[C]

Oh, I love this. I think I know who it is.

[B]

Yeah, he sends me all this kind of stuff. If anyone has it, he has it.

[C]

Great. You know who you are?

[B]

Guy Griffin. Send us. Send us this shit.

[C]

Send us that shit. And I'm also looking for the six hour. Griffin already knows this because I've tasked him already. The six hour Tom Cruise acting class workshop.

[B]

I haven't heard about this.

[C]

This is. I only just recently heard about. Tom Cruise has apparently made a six hour acting class video a la the Michael Caine videos that got passed around years ago.

[B]

Michael.

[C]

Sorry, did you want to do.

[B]

I was bringing back my character from the Austin Powers franchise, which is the young Michael Caine.

[C]

Yes, I remember. Yes. So beautiful. Yes.

[B]

Now an impression I worked up for the audition and never got to use in the finished product.

[C]

How long did you live with Michael Caine?

[B]

We were roommates. Studying him for. We were in the Batcave together. I was Batman for a brief period and he was Alfred, so.

[C]

That's so cool.

[B]

And then they replaced me.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

You get replaced a lot.

[B]

Yeah, they replaced me in the Austin Powers movie with real footage.

[C]

With just your back.

[B]

Okay. No, well, no, they used my own back.

[C]

Yeah, but a lot of people felt like that even your back wasn't a compelling performance.

[B]

Yeah. That people were tuning out during that scene.

[C]

People tuned out in the theaters. In the theaters they switched channels.

[B]

Hey, can we switch channels on this thing? Yeah, I understand. Anyway, Michael Caine, Tom Cruise, he has.

[C]

The six hour, six hour acting workshop that I'm, like, genuinely intrigued.

[B]

Yeah, I'd love to know what is it? Like, hang off the side of a building for five minutes?

[C]

Well, I hope it's. I hope. The other thing that I heard, and this is, I suspect an apocryphal story, is that Tom Cruise told Glenn Powell, his perceived successor, that he needs to as soon as possible look at video of yourself running because you don't look as cool as you think.

[B]

Was he talking about Mission Impossible 3 with the big. This huge arms?

[C]

He does that run in all the Mission impossible.

[B]

He does it.

[C]

Are you kidding?

[B]

I have to.

[C]

In the final reckoning, he runs for, I'm gonna say, 75% of the movie.

[B]

Look, this has come up on my other show. Scott hasn't.

[C]

I don't.

[B]

I don't. He doesn't do the big arms. He doesn't do the arms in every single movie.

[C]

He does the arms in every single movie.

[B]

I know these movies, like the.

[C]

I don't think you do freaking.

[B]

I don't think he's trotted it out for, like, three seconds in one of them.

[C]

He does it in all of. He thinks it looks cool as hell anyway. Look it up. Look it up. Mankazoukas.

[B]

Y. Jason Manukas.

[C]

God damn it, man.

[B]

Was about you, wasn't it?

[C]

I. Yes, yes.

[B]

When you were blacklisted.

[C]

Yeah. Oh, my God. Remember? Remember when I was mank.

[B]

Yep.

[C]

When I.

[B]

That was a great. I, I. I mean, the reboot is good.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

What's the guy's name in it? Gary Collins. Who is it?

[C]

Gary Collins. Gary Collins is mankind.

[B]

Gary Collins is Mank in Mank 2.

[C]

Terror on the lot.

[B]

It's wonderful to have you back, Jason. You're a great friend.

[C]

Thrilled to be here.

[B]

Love to have you on this auspicious day. I think that it is an auspicious day, is it not?

[C]

Whoa. Holy. That scared the hell out of Me?

[B]

Was that you, Jason?

[C]

No, it was not. Someone else is here.

[D]

It's me.

[C]

He's right there.

[D]

I'm right here.

[B]

Oh, my God. I turned my head slightly to the left. You're right. You're two inches away from me.

[C]

So how did you get in here?

[D]

I zeliged on you guys.

[C]

You full on. You fully sell.

[B]

What does that mean?

[D]

I turned into the. I turned into my environment.

[B]

Oh. Oh, I understand.

[D]

There's such a lack of personality that I. I become my surroundings.

[C]

What's crazy is you're wearing so much. So many, like, metal apparatus. You're wearing so much noisy stuff, but you yet snuck in here like a put cans on and got all set up at a microphone without us hearing any of it.

[D]

Yeah, that's right.

[B]

I also think it's amazing you're using Zelig as a reference after the whole Woody Allen stuff instead of just.

[D]

What happened?

[C]

Oh, gosh.

[B]

I mean, it's been so long, I don't even remember.

[C]

Oh, boy. You know what? Maybe nothing.

[B]

Yeah, that's what these things are like, right? You just ride it out.

[C]

Truly. I mean, he was just on Bill Maher.

[B]

That's right. A fellow podcaster.

[C]

Fellow.

[B]

We protect our own.

[D]

He went. He went to the Night Cave. What is it called?

[C]

No, it's. What is it called?

[B]

What is it called?

[C]

It's called Club Random.

[D]

He went to club.

[C]

He went to club Night Cave.

[D]

Would I love to be a fly in the wall at Club Random with Woody Allen.

[B]

Can you imagine those conversations? Like the Algonquin Round Table. Oh, it's like a Club Random table.

[C]

At Elaine's, except now it's Club Random.

[D]

Two tiny men on giant puffy chairs.

[B]

Puffy chairs. Boy, that came up in the trial. I think you don't want to be bent over one of those.

[C]

The Puffy Chair. The. The Duplass Brothers. First movie.

[B]

Not sure about that, but. Hi, Bob. Bob Duca is here. Bob. For the newer listener, Bob is my ex. Stepfather. He was.

[C]

Oh, no.

[D]

I anticipated what you were gonna ask.

[B]

He's married to my mother for six months.

[D]

Six glorious months back in the. Still a deep part of your family, I think. And.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Anyway, I'm unwell.

[B]

Scott, how are you?

[C]

Oh, I'm so sorry.

[B]

Let me get to it. How are you?

[D]

Pretty good. No, that's not true. That was a reflex. I happen to not be in neighborhood, and I thought I'd come by, get some solace from you, because what's going on? We become. As the years go by, I think if you more almost like a best friend, rather than.

[B]

I would love to segue out of our father son relationship.

[D]

That'll always be there.

[B]

I'm not comfortable with. I don't think that moving into the best friend territory is exactly where I want to go.

[D]

But that's salt and meat. That'll always be together.

[C]

What an incredible relationship. To be able to have a father son dynamic that blossoms in adulthood into.

[B]

Best friends, into just acquaintances. That would be. That would be amazing for me.

[C]

Why are you putting so many walls up?

[B]

I don't know. You know, I don't know. What is it about me? I feel like I have too many close relationships in my life.

[D]

You're probably spoiled as a child.

[B]

They spared the rod, if that means anything to you.

[D]

Then up go the walls.

[B]

So, Bob, what's going on with you?

[D]

Why are you asking? Yeah, I recently went to Dave and Buster's and had a horrible, horrible experience.

[C]

Oh, no. It's such a fun place.

[D]

I. That's what I thought.

[B]

What.

[C]

What were the. What context did you go?

[B]

Yeah, why were you there?

[C]

You were part of a birthday party.

[B]

Some sort of birthday party.

[D]

I was looking for a contractor, and it's not.

[C]

Wait a minute.

[B]

Going. Wait.

[D]

And you don't demo anything.

[C]

You thought. Wait, wait. And you thought. Did you think Dave and Busters was someplace. Yeah. Someplace where they would congregate?

[D]

Yes.

[C]

Yeah. Okay.

[D]

Yes. I thought it was their shop.

[B]

And if one was named Dave, all the better.

[D]

Sure, sure.

[C]

But in your mind, contractors are traditionally named Dave or Buster, so this must be a place where Dave's and Busters are.

[D]

Well, I needed specific work done, which was demo, a deconstruction.

[C]

Busting.

[D]

Yes. And I've never met a Dave that I don't trust.

[B]

Okay, Trust to bust and what. What kind of work to other people.

[D]

I go, you can't trust this.

[C]

Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.

[D]

I don't know the reference.

[B]

What do you need? Busted. What is. What's happening in your life? I.

[C]

Please don't say ghosts.

[B]

You. Yeah, if it's ghosts. I mean, I know that we're in almost in October. In a couple of days.

[C]

Spooky.

[B]

So it's not time for the Halloween episode. So if you're talking about ghosts, I'm out. For this reason, I'm out.

[C]

Okay. Sharks.

[D]

I got a. You know how pregnant women will get a cast of their tummy?

[B]

No, I don't know that.

[C]

I've never heard of that. Now tell us more about this, Bob.

[D]

Where did.

[B]

Where.

[D]

Where did you get me started about pregnant ladies tummies.

[C]

I do happen to notice that you have quite a bit of plaster of Paris in your back.

[D]

And I can't get it off. I. I was advised. I was advised by my life coach to. To mother myself. I have an inner child, of course. So that means I have an outer mother.

[C]

Inner child. Outer mother.

[D]

And as you know, I'm. I'm dripping with estrogen.

[C]

Good Lord. Just a word I would never want you to use.

[D]

I'm going in male perimenopause.

[B]

What does that entail exactly?

[D]

Well, look at these tits. You tell me.

[B]

Put them on the glass just so I can see them a little.

[C]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[D]

You manograms here.

[C]

Manograms, yes. Just making sure.

[B]

So what are you trying to. Are you saying that you were constructing a large.

[D]

I had a cast made of my tummy that I would then put up in my home to send reverence to my inner child.

[C]

So you don't wear it. You just.

[B]

You don't fall into a giant cast.

[D]

You put the plaster on your tummy, it hardens.

[C]

And by the way, thank you for using the word tummy.

[D]

Oh, yes.

[C]

Rather than any medical terms.

[B]

Right, right.

[D]

And then. And then you. You make a statue. Like a statue of that. You know when people do that with their faces, they make a thing of their face.

[B]

I've seen the comedy and drama mask up on the wall of any woman I've ever dated since 1985.

[C]

Wow, you've been dating.

[D]

Are you a drama teacher? Interesting. Anyway, and I couldn't get this plaster off. I used the wrong combo.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[D]

And I'm very mad. I got it from a. A slime YouTuber. I got the recipe from a slime YouTuber.

[B]

What is the slime YouTuber?

[D]

They make slime.

[B]

Oh, okay. Do they pour it on themselves a la Nickelodeon or.

[D]

No, they just make it. It's slight, you know, Slime.

[C]

Wrong slime. Wrong slime.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[D]

Yeah, good reference. And anyway, I couldn't get it off, so I went to Dave and Buster's, and it turns out it's not a licensed contractor or a demo place. There's not a sledgehammer in sight.

[B]

Was anyone there close to a contractor?

[D]

There were some people in maga shirts. Okay, that tracks. Food. It's an arcade games. Arcade. A game.

[B]

We know what Dave and Buster. Yes, we've been.

[D]

It's a big place. They have sports TVs. They have food.

[C]

Well, they just have TVs with sports on. They're not Sports?

[D]

No, I don't think so.

[C]

What do you mean?

[D]

Different TVs for different events? No. Yes. Not a movie TV?

[C]

No, they are the same, Bob. You only need one.

[B]

Wait a minute. Are you switching your TV out anytime you want to watch a different type of program at your house?

[D]

I'm at Costco. Or are you every other day?

[C]

Or are you. Or are you not watching certain things because you want. You think it won't appear on your.

[D]

The res is bad. Bad res.

[C]

Bad, bad res.

[D]

Speaking of bad res, I made a bad reservation.

[B]

Oh, no. Where? Where?

[D]

At Dave and Buster.

[B]

Oh, what happened?

[D]

There was plenty of seats, but they wanted me to make a reservation. There's a maitre d there, so I decided to check it out. Even though I knew the. The menu would not be good for me. I was very, very hungry.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Why is the menu not good for you? Oh, just because of your food intolerances?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Yes. What did you end up eating?

[D]

Thanks for asking. I ate these foods and they got me very, very sick. And if I could have just a moment of silence.

[B]

Sure.

[D]

When I read these off, I want people to understand that this is a very emotional time for me. And as I read these, I'm letting them go. The following is a list of foods that I recently ate at Dave and Buster's. Smash Burger Smoke Ass Ribs with Honey Glaze, Atari Sauce, Cheese Stick Stack Barbacoa Quesadilla Loaded Barbacoa Fries Lee Iacocca Onion Rings, Meat Lovers Funnel Cake, Pretzel Dog French Toast, Truffle Dusted Lost and Found Salad Loaded Nachos, Yolked Nachos, Buff nachos with Blue Lives Matter dipping Sauce, Punisher Flag nachos with Goruck Queso and a side of Bullets Fajitas Lemon Pepper Chicken wings with Nintendo Dip, Berry Pepper Chicken Wings, Red Bull pancakes with Honey Barbecue Chunks, Applewood Smoke Bartender Key Card Aioli Tasting Flight, Slurpee Martini, Jalapeno Guinness Habanero, Smart Water, Garlic Parm, Banana Bread, Pan Fried Arcade Bologna, Bone in Salami Sliders, Hand breaded Chimp strips with Sega Glaze Pickle Brined Crispy Pigeon Sandwich, Southwest Salmon Plate, Northeast Carp Platter, Four Corners Diarrhea Bone Beer Battered onion rings and breaded Elder Abuse Mozzarella sticks. All of which left me feeling very, very ill. Yeah.

[B]

Bob. Wow. That's.

[C]

That's. You ate all of that?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah. Aside from the quality, I thought it was a game. Yeah. Oh.

[C]

Oh, you thought the menu was a game?

[D]

I thought everything was a game.

[B]

Did they give you tickets afterwards.

[C]

Did you win anything?

[D]

They did, I, I, they did. They did give me. They felt bad. They said if I didn't sue, they'd give me tokens.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Oh, tokens. To play other.

[D]

And it only got worse from there.

[C]

Oh, no.

[B]

Oh. What?

[D]

The following are injuries that I received in the arcade playing the games.

[C]

Oh, gosh.

[D]

Oh, God. Although these were playing. I was playing games, but I didn't realize I was playing with my life. Human claw machine wedgie. I was roughed up. Roughed up by arcade. Urchins, Halo, ptosis, Dance Dance revolution, meniscus tear, first person shooter, cooties, fortnite, sweats held, diverticulosis, curved spine, craft, centipediatric diabetes, galagotism, the legend of Zika, breath of the wild, tears of the kidney cysts, and it's a me Mersa.

[C]

It's a me Mersa.

[D]

So, as you can imagine, I feel awful.

[B]

Bob, I'm so sorry.

[D]

Now I'm your problem because I need solace.

[B]

Look, we're in the middle of a show. I don't know if you know that, but we're recording Coffee Bang Bang right now. Yeah, I mean, Jason and I hang out occasionally, but.

[C]

And we hang out occasionally in front of microphones. Yes, yes, of course, but, but yes, no, we are recording.

[D]

I thought these were like steampunk hearing aids that you had with these.

[B]

No, no, these are, yeah, they're.

[C]

Sounds like you're leading into a new list.

[B]

Well, but, Bob, I, we'll, we'll do what we can. I mean, this sounds like a terrible.

[C]

Or is there anything. Yes. Is there any. Can we call someone on your behalf?

[D]

You guys are rich. Do you do that thing where they, they come with IV drips?

[B]

I, I, I, I have had that.

[C]

I've done it.

[D]

Chicken soup, IV drip or whatever. Mainly mess those Bert Kreischer post party IV drips.

[C]

I don't know if they're branded that.

[B]

Way, but I don't know what Bert Kreischer does.

[C]

We can look into whether.

[D]

Oh, like you don't listen to Two Bears, One Cave.

[B]

I, I, Look, I, I love podcasters, but that's not one that I partook upon.

[C]

What are your favorite podcasts, Bob? I'm just so curious.

[D]

Like, it sounds like you listen to 1010 WINS news.

[C]

Okay, yeah. You give us 10 minutes, we'll give you the world.

[D]

Huh? Traffic and weather on the ones.

[C]

Okay, well, that's still 1010 wins.

[B]

Yeah. Why do you only have 10 minutes, Bob? It seems like you don't do anything.

[D]

I got things.

[B]

You don't have a job.

[C]

And I think you might just be listening to New York Radio. New York AM radio? I can't imagine that's a podcast.

[D]

Brian Lair.

[C]

Okay. No, that's wnyc.

[D]

That's a. I don't think so.

[C]

Brian Lear. He's the morning man on wnyc.

[B]

Trust us, we know about these things.

[D]

Anyway, there's a lot of them.

[C]

Do not say Satirius Johnson.

[B]

Well, Bob, I. I don't know what we can do.

[D]

Bob Edwards.

[B]

Sure. But you can stick around and do the show with us, if that's okay.

[C]

What do I do, Leonard Low?

[B]

Paint. I mean, you're just sort of a co host. Sort of like what Jason does.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

You know, interrupts all the time.

[D]

Okay, what do we. Okay. You. Do you be.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

I'll be the. I'll be. I'll be that. The. The Wolf. You're Scott Aerman and the Wolf.

[B]

I don't know that you need to adopt a Persona.

[D]

Hey, what's that? What's it. My wife made me go buy tampons.

[C]

Hey, Wolf, you're married.

[D]

Ah, boy. Don't even remind me of it, boy.

[C]

Oh, okay.

[D]

She's.

[B]

She.

[C]

Well, you brought it up.

[D]

Yeah, yeah. She cheated on me, Wolf.

[B]

No, what happened after or before you bought her the tampons?

[C]

She did. What happened?

[D]

I bought it. Yeah. I bought her the tampons.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

I tried to save money.

[C]

Oh, no. And what did you. What did you do?

[B]

What'd you end up buying?

[D]

I went to a army surplus store. I bought her old World War II gauze.

[C]

World War II gauze.

[D]

Gauze. Like a medic supply.

[C]

Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. That's not. You don't want to put that anywhere near a sensitive area.

[D]

Yeah, they're called mash pads.

[C]

I believe you. Yeah, it's just.

[B]

No, I believe you do.

[C]

How would you know to do that? Why not just go buy tampons? In other words?

[D]

I don't. Hey, man, I'm a guy. I don't want to do that. Classic Wolf.

[C]

Hey, call.

[D]

Call in right now if you've ever been in that situation where your lady says, come buy your tampons, and you're.

[B]

Well, if we can't take calls, I'm calling.

[C]

But that is. How about this, though? If you want to call in to a future episode, leave a voicemail for Scott. Send Scott a voicemail that's asking the.

[D]

Wolf any questions you have and tell me which stocks are.

[B]

Are.

[D]

Are going off right then I'll know now.

[C]

Yep.

[D]

To get them.

[B]

Sure. I don't know that in the future. That'll help you out. But.

[C]

But people can leave that information in their voicemails.

[B]

Yeah, leave stock information. And what was the other thing?

[C]

Any questions you have for the Wolf, if that's ever happened to you before, where your. Your wife says to go buy tampons and you.

[B]

And then what did you do?

[C]

Go to the Army Navy Surf plus and buy mash?

[D]

You're just trying to watch the game and she says, can you give me.

[C]

What game are you watching?

[B]

The. The guy.

[D]

Oh, man. The. The new. They hired the Japanese guy came in and they spend. It's so expensive. That one.

[B]

You mainly watch for the salaries. Is that what I'm getting? Well, look, Wolf or. Or Bob or. Or whoever. We.

[C]

I love this. I love having Bob in as the Wolf. This is great.

[B]

Yeah. If you want to stay in character as the Wolf the entire time. We usually don't have people coming in and doing characters, but if you want to do that, that's fine.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

I mean, I will say, Bob, it came so naturally.

[D]

Oh, thank you.

[B]

Almost as if you've been preparing for this your entire life.

[D]

Really?

[B]

You were so deep in it.

[D]

I was. It's weird. I was bit by a morning DJ one time.

[B]

Oh, boy. Okay. Was he radio.

[C]

Was it Wolfman J?

[D]

I don't know. But then I heard that there's a curse that I may turn into one.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, boy. Well, a midday wolf transformation.

[B]

Look, Jason and Wolf, you're gonna stay as the wolf.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

We need to take a break.

[D]

Let's get the lead out.

[B]

Yeah. We have a big show.

[C]

Is it two for Tuesday as well? So we got two Led Zeppelin songs coming your way, I think.

[B]

Yeah, we're gonna do two Led Zeppelin songs and then a few ads. And then when we come back, we're gonna have a foreign exchange student. And coming up a little later, we have someone from America's heartland. This is a packed show.

[C]

This is amazing, incredible stuff.

[B]

We're gonna be right back with more Comedy Bang Bang with Jason and the Wolf after this. Yes. This episode of Comedy Bang Bang is brought to you by Squarespace. Whether you're just starting out or maybe you're scaling your business, Squarespace is the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online with Squarespace's collection of cutting edge design tools. These are real tools, by the way. It's like a hammer they have. Squarespace reached out and they said, we invented a new Hammer. It's cutting edge. I said, please Hammer, don't hurt him. And we all laughed. But in any case, they have some great tools and anyone can build a bespoke online presence that perfectly fits their brand or business. Start with Blueprint AI, Squarespace's AI enhanced website builder to get a fully custom website in just a few steps, using basic information about your industry goals and personality to create premium quality content and personalized design recommendations. And every dream needs a domain, doesn't it? Well, Squarespace Domains makes it easy to find the best name for your business at one fair, all inclusive price. No hidden fees or add ons required. Head over to squarespace.com Bang Bang for a free trial and when you are ready to launch, use offer code Bang bang to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. For years everyone thought Verizon had the best network because they did.

[D]

But now the best mobile network in the US is T Mobile. T Mobile's network has the most advanced 5G with more towers and their signal.

[B]

Reaches further than ever.

[D]

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[C]

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[B]

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[C]

We're back with the Wolf. What's up, Wolf man?

[B]

Did you know you could do a Wolfman Jack?

[C]

All right, that's basically it.

[B]

We also have the wolf here who is our co host at least the foreseeable future.

[D]

Is this ever happen to you? And your wife's like, where's the remote control? And you're like, hey, I'm, I'm, I'm like, I, I got.

[C]

Take your time.

[D]

This fence, I got to, I got to fix this. You want me to fix the fence or you want the remote control? And, and you just.

[B]

Why, why not both? Like she could watch whatever she wants while you fix the fence.

[D]

That's a good point.

[B]

Just do the wolf.

[C]

Do the wolf.

[B]

Just do the wolf call. We'll save it. Yeah.

[C]

Oh, God.

[B]

That's like a wolf impersonating dying duck.

[C]

Is the wolf okay?

[D]

The wolf has lupus.

[C]

Oh, no.

[B]

How ironic.

[C]

Lupine lupus.

[D]

Lupine lupus.

[B]

I'm so sorry to hear that, wolf. Well, you know, our best goes out to you and your family as you try to get through this difficult time. But we do need to get to our next guest. Let's see, he's a foreign exchange student. This is Fascina. Every once in a while, we bring people on from different cultures, different countries, and we like to talk to them about their lives. And today is no exception. Please welcome to the show for the first time, Peter Streusel.

[E]

You guys, Hi.

[C]

Hey, Peter. How are you?

[E]

I'm amazing.

[C]

Oh, wow. Oh, that's awesome, you guys.

[E]

It's so good to be here.

[B]

So good to have you. This is the wolf.

[D]

Hold on. If I may speak in my regular voice. I'm actually Bob.

[E]

Bob. That was incredible.

[D]

Thank you.

[E]

I couldn't believe how he became the wolf.

[C]

Right? Oh, wow. I'm Jason. Just so you know.

[B]

Also known as Jeffrey, character Wheaties.

[C]

Oh, yes.

[B]

Can we hear from Jeffrey?

[C]

Yeah. And hi, I'm Jeffrey, character Wheaties.

[B]

Yeah. So, yeah, Very different.

[E]

Oh, my God, everyone's so talented here. And Scott, I know you because I've been staying in your guest house.

[B]

That's right, Yes. I have multiple guest houses on the property and I like to bring people in from various other cultures.

[C]

It's so generous of you to be hosting people from other cultures. Peter, where are you? Where do you hail from? Where are you from?

[E]

Austria.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[B]

Austria.

[E]

Yeah. And I've been having summer here and staying in Scott's guest house.

[B]

I did want to ask. Summer's over at this point.

[D]

Is it?

[B]

How much longer are you going to be here?

[E]

Well, that's the question. It's awesome now it's so beautiful out. Oh, my God.

[C]

You have to stay here for autumn. It's so great.

[B]

California, autumn. They're so amazing. Six degrees, nothing changes.

[C]

The leaves are turning that orange and red. The crisp.

[E]

Oh, I can't wait. And that's. Actually, I'm looking for a place to stay. Sounds like Scott doesn't want me anymore.

[C]

Oh, yes, he does.

[B]

No, I. I could be. I could. I don't know, I could reconsider if you like. What? What do you have plans to do while you're here?

[E]

I guess go hiking.

[B]

Sure.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

I guess I meant more long term. Like, why do you want to stay here?

[E]

Oh, it's so beautiful. And also, probably for, like, medical procedure maybe.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay.

[E]

What's happening, you guys?

[B]

Bob. I mean, the wolf's ears pricked up.

[D]

Is that part of a thing?

[C]

If you.

[D]

If you're an exchange student, do you get medical procedures?

[E]

Well, did you.

[B]

Maybe we could swap you for Bob over here and you could go to Austria and get some medical procedures.

[D]

Well, no, it sounds like.

[C]

Like a medical exchange for.

[D]

For medical procedure.

[B]

But if you swap, maybe you'll get.

[C]

If it's an exchange program, maybe you can go and get Austrian medical procedure while Peter's getting American.

[E]

Are you looking for medical procedure?

[D]

I want an Austrian colonoscopy.

[B]

What's the difference between the two?

[D]

Chocolate.

[B]

Oh, okay. Chocolate comes out instead of.

[C]

I don't think.

[D]

I don't know.

[C]

I don't think that's chocolate. I don't think that's chocolate. And the same stuff comes out here.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[D]

Oh, I don't know.

[C]

It's just that our chocolate is worse than. Than Europe's chocolate.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. Austria. Now does it. I feel like everything smells like candy there.

[E]

It really does. It's so wonderful over there. But not as good as here in Los Angeles.

[D]

In Scotsboro, usa, baby. That's.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

And so how long have you been here? What have you been doing for your summer?

[E]

Well, I had an internship before.

[C]

Great.

[E]

And then it ran out, so my visa was in a tricky situation.

[C]

Oh, be careful right now, you guys.

[E]

I was scared. But then Scott sponsored me. Thank you, Scott.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I actually. No, I called ice. It was very. I mean, it's. I. I know. I can see where the confusion is, but. No, I ratted you out, actually. I don't know why they haven't shown up.

[E]

Well, actually, ICE did show up. We became the best of friends. Oh, that's so nice, guys. Is the. Not so bad.

[D]

This is the Wolf. You know, I'm better with Dean Kane, and I gotta say this.

[C]

You don't have to say, this is the wolf.

[D]

Well, I just want.

[C]

You don't have to say, this is the wolf.

[D]

And scene. The wolf. I'm the wolf that Dean Kane is speaking of Ice. You know, he's. He's. He's like. He's incredible. In incredible shape, and he's doing something.

[B]

How's he doing? He injured himself doing that obstacle course. I know.

[D]

Oh, I didn't hear about that.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Even with his fingerless gloves.

[C]

He'S feeling the cane pain right now.

[B]

Yeah, but so Peter So you've made friends with ice. You're here for a while. What, they're not that bad, according to you.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

And so, what, you want some medical procedures?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

What is it you want to do.

[C]

With your life that you want, medically speaking, or is this a necessity?

[E]

It's a necessity. Oh, no, unfortunately. Yeah. But it's kind of depressing. We don't even have to talk about it. We can talk about Los Angeles in autumn. So beautiful.

[C]

Oh, it's gorgeous. It is. It is gorgeous.

[E]

But, yeah, I do need to get a very serious transplant.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

It sounds the perfect time of year to go for a picnic.

[E]

Yes.

[C]

You know, go take a picnic into the park.

[E]

Just picnic. My favorite park. Elian.

[B]

Sure.

[C]

It's a good one.

[B]

I mean, we could name Los Angeles landmarks all day, but it's.

[E]

Oh, please.

[B]

Yeah, when I said that, I kind of meant sarcastic.

[C]

Started it. Scott, go ahead.

[D]

Ray's Famous Pizza, the Battery.

[C]

The Automotive museum on Wilshire.

[B]

Johnny's across the street. But look, this is the longest Scott.

[E]

Has ever talked to me.

[C]

Scott, why aren't you talking to Peter?

[B]

Well, I didn't realize, Peter, that that was part of the arrangement that we had. I mean, I basically sent someone over there to Austria and someone I was trying to get rid of here, and I didn't realize we had.

[E]

That was the exchange.

[B]

Yes. Yeah.

[D]

But what's the transplant? Because I know people with extra stuff.

[C]

And just out of curiosity. Only because it's moving into autumn and fall and all that comes with it. Peter, are you a pumpkin eater?

[E]

What's pumpkin?

[B]

What's pumpkin? Do you not have pumpkins in Austria?

[C]

And we do want to get to whatever transplant you need. That. I just want to be clear, but we would love to get to the bottom of this pumpkin. Pumpkin situation.

[E]

Yeah, I. Me, too. How does it look?

[B]

Well, it's. Look, I mean, it's. Have you ever seen a basketball? The most orange ball.

[E]

Yeah. Los Angeles.

[B]

That's a good start.

[E]

Beautiful. So full of basketball courts where I play one on one.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Against whom?

[E]

In Bellevue Park.

[C]

Nice.

[E]

In Barnsdale Park.

[B]

Great.

[C]

When all the bees. All the bee parks.

[E]

And then I said Elysian as well.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

We're going alphabetically with the parks moving backwards.

[E]

So basketball. Pretty much. I'm on the same page, you guys.

[B]

Okay, so. So imagine a basketball, but then put, like, a little green or. Or kind of off white. It's like an orange stem on gourd.

[E]

A gourd? Yeah.

[B]

Oh, okay. That. That's a better way of describing what.

[E]

A much better pumpkin is.

[C]

You know, a pumpkin is a fruit.

[B]

Is it really? Yeah.

[C]

All gourds are fruits.

[B]

Great.

[D]

But not roots or gourds.

[C]

There you go. Thanks.

[D]

This is Wolf. Speaking of parks, I work out at Venice beach because I love it's. It's medically proven, in the hot, hot, hot sun, you can lift more weight.

[C]

Oh, wow. Yeah, you are. You seem to be, since last I saw you, though, have lost quite a bit of weight.

[D]

I have, yeah.

[C]

Are you on the shot? Are you on Ozempic?

[B]

Huh?

[C]

I don't know if it's cool to ask.

[D]

Yeah, I have an Ozempic sniper. I don't. They don't tell me when it's coming.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Because I don't. I feel like it's effeminate to take it.

[C]

Sure, sure.

[D]

I just have. I hire somebody. It wouldn't be so bad. Sure, sure.

[C]

So you just have someone with a tranquilizer gun, but instead of delivering a tranquilizer, they pop out.

[D]

They do it in the cutest way.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Sometimes at 500 yards.

[D]

Yep. Sometimes they're just in a garbage can and they come up.

[E]

Oh, my God, the Wolf. I think I saw you in Venice.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

Are you skateboarding?

[D]

Yeah, I skateboard. With no shirt and thick jeans.

[C]

How many ounces are those jeans, man? They seem.

[D]

Oh, man, they seem heavy. And these jeans have not lost anything.

[B]

That salvages a width of like an inch and a half or something. Incredible.

[D]

Yeah, these are car hearts from the seventies.

[B]

Oh, my gosh.

[D]

They're made out of fire hose.

[E]

Ounces, you say?

[C]

Yeah, they use them to cut diamonds.

[E]

Fluid. It's fluid ounces. So the jeans are wet?

[D]

Yeah, they get poured on the inside.

[C]

They get poured on.

[D]

They're wet on the inside. I have. I have. I have mushrooms in my legs.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[D]

What's the biggest culture shock when you're. When you're. When you're out here.

[E]

Oh, thank you, you guys. And thank you, the Wolf. For me, it's having to be not being with my cat.

[B]

Oh, well, you left your cat in Austria.

[E]

Yeah, I left.

[C]

What's your cat's name? Eddie.

[E]

Eddie's in Austria.

[C]

Oh, how old?

[E]

Oh, five.

[C]

Oh, okay. Wow.

[E]

Inhuman.

[B]

Oh, inhuman.

[E]

And we used to go on so many adventure. What is cat years?

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

What is cat years, Scott?

[B]

Isn't there some sort of formula? They have nine lives, which means, like, if you divide, you know, an average cat lifespan in by nine, those are.

[C]

What's an average cat lifespan? And then you divide that by nine.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So you divide that by nine.

[B]

Every two years is a cat year.

[C]

I think two years is a cat.

[B]

Yeah. So your cat is like two and a half cat years.

[C]

Oh, wow. So cat.

[E]

So he's younger.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[E]

Oh, that's.

[B]

You gotta watch.

[E]

Amazing. That's awesome.

[C]

Oh, as your cat gets older, it gets younger. Interesting.

[E]

That's great news. Because I love Eddie.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[B]

Why leave Eddie for so long? And why stay here? I mean, not. I'm not pushing you to go back. I just. Who's taking care of Eddie? What's happening with Eddie? Yes.

[E]

Well, even though I am now friends with the ice guys, we are at an impasse. I can't travel internationally and want to return here.

[B]

Right.

[E]

So Eddie having to wait. But I love Eddie and we go on so many adventures together.

[D]

You go like one of those weird outdoor cats.

[E]

Yeah. He ride my shoulder.

[D]

Oh.

[B]

Oh, cool.

[C]

Like a bird.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

And again, who's taking care of Eddie? Or is anyone taking care of Eddie?

[E]

Oh, Eddie's tough.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

Eddie's tough.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

This. This is not making me feel better about the whole.

[C]

So Eddie's on his own.

[E]

Yeah. So I miss him terribly. I wish he was.

[C]

So you have no idea what's up with Eddie.

[E]

Oh, he's a really tough guy.

[C]

Okay, you can probably. Now when you say tough, you furrow everything. You furrow everything. You furrow. It's a full. Full body furrow.

[E]

Guys, I'm pretty sure Eddie's a fighter, okay?

[C]

Oh, I believe it.

[E]

Yeah. So he's being good, probably. And I. But I can't wait to see him again.

[D]

Oh, I bet. I bet Eddie's doing great. Is Bob. I bet he said doing great. I bet he's, like, hanging out in alley playing fishbone marimbas.

[B]

Just garbage can.

[C]

Like, like, top cat.

[D]

Yeah, sure. Once they go homeless, they get a hat.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

One where the top is kind of like, like. And it's.

[D]

He's not a donkey. No, it's a cat. It's a street cat. He's just got like a.

[C]

A jaunty cap.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

Are you saying you think maybe Eddie having fingerless gloves?

[C]

Wow.

[D]

Could be.

[B]

Do.

[C]

Does Eddie have any, like, demonstrable skills? Like, how is he, do you think? Is he like busking? Can he play an instrument or what does he do? Does he do tricks?

[E]

He's really calm. Like, when I found him start putting him on my shoulder, he didn't fight it at all.

[B]

I don't know whether I would pay to see the that.

[C]

But that's cool. As hell, though.

[E]

You would pay to see that.

[B]

No, I, I, I would.

[E]

You're signing. You're saying now you're paying to see.

[B]

No, no, I'm saying I would not. I'm sorry, are contractions difficult for you? I would not pay to see that.

[E]

Okay, so you're paying me.

[B]

So you would pay to see that?

[C]

You would pay to not see it.

[B]

Okay, no, again, but I, I'm afraid I. Look, I hate to say this, Peter, but I think Eddie, if not dead already, Eddie doesn't have long for this world without saying, take care of him. I mean, what's.

[C]

Have you not heard that Eddie's a fighter?

[D]

Oh, also, they must have. This is the Wolf. Don't they have socialized garbage in, In Austria? Everything's free.

[C]

You probably get, like, socialized cat medicine. I, I bet is part of it.

[B]

Well, hopefully someone's looking after Eddie. We, we wish the best for Eddie.

[E]

I know what you're trying to do. You don't want me anymore in the pool house, so you're trying to convince me to leave.

[C]

I just had a great idea.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Instead, why don't we.

[E]

I live with, with you.

[C]

That's possible, by the way, but what I was going to pitch is why don't we raise a little bit of money on the podcast and bring Eddie to America? Like, why? I, I, Because I agree with you, Scott. I think that Peter and Eddie need to be reunited, but I think it needs to be on American soil, Some.

[B]

Sort of GoFundMe where we have to pay for someone to locate Eddie first.

[C]

Go fund yourself.

[D]

That's a good idea. This is the Wolf. Call in right now if you want to donate some money to keep Eddie going. And the fifth caller comes.

[B]

We're only taking the fifth call to.

[D]

Get, to get a ticket to the Six Flags.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[D]

Fifth caller.

[C]

Fifth caller gets a ticket to Six Flags.

[D]

Six Flags. Save Eddie.

[C]

Yeah, I.

[B]

Look, California's great and all. I just, I just, I don't know why you, you know, you're only here for a little bit of time. I, I, Unless something's going on in your life where you need to stay here, do, or do you need to emigrate or do you think I could do it it. I believe in you, if that's what you're asking.

[E]

I would love to be here permanently.

[C]

Wow.

[D]

What a wonderful country this is. Bob, I'll marry you. I'll marry you. But we have to. I want to become an Austrian citizen, and I want to be a prince.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[E]

Bob. Or the Wolf, I'd love to marry you.

[D]

Wait, so you could stay here?

[E]

But I have to be honest, you guys. I'm not royalty. So I wonder about how you'd be be prince.

[D]

What about those puffy velvet Jod spurs you're wearing?

[B]

What about those, Peter?

[C]

Yeah, what about those, Peter?

[E]

What about those?

[D]

And that. That. That velvety crown thing on your head?

[E]

Yeah, Peter, what about those?

[B]

No, we're asking you that, Peter.

[D]

Whoa.

[E]

Oh, wait.

[D]

Okay, so are you sure you're not royalty?

[E]

You who?

[B]

This is not like a Jedi mind trick kind of situation. This is just a pure question, the type of which we ask on the show all the time.

[D]

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. This is Bob. I bet you. I bet you are. You a prince and you just want to be a regular boy, and that's why you don't want to go back.

[C]

Whoa.

[B]

You want to make a PNP situation. Prince and Popper.

[D]

Who?

[B]

Prince and Popper.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

Pnp.

[D]

That other morning radio team.

[C]

Pnp.

[D]

Prince and the Pauper.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

That was when Prince and John Popper teamed up, I think.

[C]

Yes.

[D]

I want to see that documentary for nine hours.

[E]

You know what, Griffin? I have to come clean. I guess you got me. I'm pretty much a prince.

[B]

Whoa, whoa. Peter, you're a prince. And it all makes sense now.

[C]

You're a prince of a man. I'll say that.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

I just wanted to have real college experience.

[B]

Wow.

[E]

And so I came here and sleeping in Scott's pool house.

[B]

It's not really a real college experience sleeping in my pool house.

[C]

It's not. Not like a college. It's like, you know, the room is trashed. You keep it really messy. It's just a bunch of video and three old porno tapes.

[E]

And by the way, I lied about my cat, too.

[B]

What's going on with your cat? Or do you even have one?

[E]

Well, it's actually a big tiger because I'm.

[C]

Because you're a royalty? Yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Wow.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

I think you're Tiger. Eddie's fine, then. Oh, cool.

[E]

And guess what? His name's not Eddie.

[C]

What is it?

[E]

Are you guys. His name's Cloud.

[C]

Klaus.

[E]

Yeah. And he lives in the palace.

[D]

Oh, wow.

[C]

Whoa. Wait a minute. Is he, like. Can he, like, do. Because. Is he, like, super fancy? Can he talk? Can he do, like, special stuff?

[E]

You're silly.

[C]

Okay. No, no.

[D]

Okay.

[E]

Okay, well. But he's tough.

[C]

Oh, of course I would. I. I bet he's a fighter.

[B]

Are frightening.

[E]

Remember how I said he's a fighter?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

Now it's now it makes sense now.

[C]

Now that he's a tiger.

[E]

Oh, it's making sense.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

That's cool. If I was royalty, I'd do that, like Tiger Bo and make him a fighter. Get those animal bear baiting, all that stuff.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

So you're telling me my clothes gave it all away, huh?

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, your sash as well, that says prints on it.

[C]

Yep. Your scepter.

[E]

So what, you think the guys that a pie, they know too, huh?

[B]

I think they probably do. If this. I mean, quite honestly, you've been here all summer. This is what you've worn every single day.

[E]

Yeah, well, what. What else am I supposed to wear?

[B]

Do you not change clothes in Austria?

[C]

Like, any of the clothes that other people are wearing? I've also noticed you swimming in this outf. Which seems like it would immediately be so heavy. You're struggling against the weight of the wet velvet.

[D]

I was at Venice beach and I saw you come out of the water. It was like a cartoon. It was just like your big puffy jots, spurs and water coming out. And if like a fish or a.

[E]

Bunch of fish, Right? That's right. You guys, I had a lot of fish in my pockets, so I'm a little confused now. So not everybody's getting dressed by royal helpers every day.

[B]

Oh, is that who all those people are? Oh, you have servants. Servants. We don't like to call them servants anymore. Or the master bedroom.

[E]

I didn't even say those words.

[C]

You have both brought those up and shamed us for using them.

[B]

That's right. Guys, come on, let's keep it classy on comedy. Bang Bang.

[C]

This is the Wolf.

[D]

Give a call if your wife has ever just said, hey, you're going to a friend's house. And she's like, that's what you're wearing. You're like, hey, I thought it was just a barbecue. She said, yeah, but you got to dress up. And I'm like, it's a polo shirt. And she's. I mean, yeah, thanks.

[C]

Yeah. Just calling now.

[B]

You need a little help with the dismount, Wolf.

[C]

You know what, though? It's. You know, he's brand new at this, and I just wanted say, like, he's doing great. I want to encourage Bob.

[B]

You're doing great. Wolf. Bob. Wolf. Wolf.

[D]

T. Bob. He needs it.

[B]

Bob, you're doing. You're doing great, Bob.

[D]

Thank you. Yeah.

[E]

All right, so you can't say master bedroom and. But you're always saying wife beater. You're wearing a lot of them.

[B]

Yeah, well, sure. I mean, but that. Who can change 55 years of saying something one way, you know, for me.

[E]

Oh, I thought you meant culturally.

[B]

Culturally. Culturally, it's been probably less.

[C]

And when I suggested you change it to the modern wife eater, you said, no thanks.

[E]

I've heard wife pleaser.

[C]

Oh, really? To describe the tank top. Why can't we just do tank top?

[B]

How would that please a wife?

[E]

Okay, so you prefer wife eater.

[C]

Then I. I say tank top.

[E]

Okay.

[C]

As far as I'm concerned. Tank top.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

I'm learning so much, you guys.

[B]

Yeah, well, your English is fantastic. Or do you speak English in Austria?

[E]

I'm not quite sure we're all speaking English.

[C]

I have a question now, Peter. Now that the, the curtain has been pulled aside and we you are revealed to be a prince, do you in fact need any medical treatments here or was that all a clever ruse?

[E]

It was real.

[D]

Wow.

[B]

Oh, no. Do they even for a prince, they don't have specific medical services there in Austria that we have here.

[E]

Want to do it? But here you guys have amazing plastic surgeons.

[B]

Oh, wait, are you getting a bbl?

[E]

That's right.

[B]

Oh, Peter.

[E]

Well, look at the pan. I'm waiting.

[D]

Oh, they're gonna be in that shape.

[C]

Yeah, you gotta fill out those blousy pants.

[B]

You're getting a side bbl.

[E]

Yes.

[B]

Got it, got it.

[E]

It's good to be seen and heard.

[C]

Oh, wow. Oh, this is so exciting.

[B]

This is great for you.

[C]

It's so cool to watch you like, blossom into the person that you want to be.

[E]

Yeah, it's all thanks to Scott.

[B]

I mean, look, I open up my home to you and to your 20 man servants and. And you know, I'm happy to do it. It's wonderful to have you on the show.

[E]

Oh, thank you for having me.

[B]

Yeah, of course. I mean, we do need to take a break. Do you want to stick around? Is that possible? We have someone coming up from. Someone from America's heartland.

[E]

I'd love to.

[C]

Have you ever been to America's heartland?

[E]

I'm going now.

[C]

Oh, wow. This is going to be great. This is going to be great.

[B]

Well, Wolf, do you want to take us into commercial?

[D]

Sure. I just wanted to let people know when I've got my car lease. I went to Del Monte, Del Monte Honda and they got it. Got an incredible deal. An amazing. I got the Tundra truck, it's got four Alpha.

[B]

Okay, we're, we're going to come right back.

[C]

We're kind of want to see where this is going.

[B]

We're we're going to come right back with more Jason Manzoukas, more Peter Streusel, more the Wolf. And we have someone from America's heartland. We'll be right back with more comedy Bang bang after this morning. Zoe got donuts. Jeff Bridges, why are you still living above our garage?

[A]

Well, I dig the mattress and I want to be in a T Mobile commercial like you teach me.

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So Dana.

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Oh no, I'm not really prepared.

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I couldn't possibly at T Mobile get.

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Wow, impressive.

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Let me try.

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T Mobile is the best place to get iPhone 17 Pro because they've got the best network.

[B]

Nice. Jeffrey, you heard them.

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T Mobile is the best place to get the new iPhone 17 Pro on us with eligible traded in any condition.

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So what are we having for lodge dude?

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[C]

Here and I'm John Gabris.

[B]

We're a couple actors and best friends who you may know as the host of the TV show 101 Places to Party before you die. Now we're bringing you a comedic look at health and wellness with our new show, Staying Alive.

[C]

We'll have guests like our friend, actor.

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Jerry O', Connell, ketamine therapist Dr. Stephen.

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Radowitz, Paul Shear, Ego Wodem, Gillian Bell.

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Get them a week early and ad free with SiriusXM podcast plus on Apple Podcasts.

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If you're looking to help your child catch up, stay sharp or get a head start this school year without the stress. IXL is the answer. Its interactive lessons keep kids engaged with content tailored to their level pace and learning style. IXL is the award winning platform proven to boost grades in math, science, social studies and more. One subscription works for all your kids, saving your family time and money. Visit ixl.com 20 to get the most effective learning program out there with an exclusive 20% off Comedy Bang Bang. We're back. Jason Manzoukas is here.

[C]

Comedy bang bang.

[B]

Comedy bang bang. Comedy bang bang.

[C]

Comedy bang bang.

[B]

Are you Richard Nixon? Oh, wait, was that band Bane?

[C]

Bang bang.

[B]

Batman. Jason Manzuka is of course, who played Bane in the Batman trilogy, is here. And we also have Peter Stel, who is a prince from Austria, here to get a side bbl. And also we have the Wolf here, our co host, of course, for now and the foreseeable future. What's going on, Wolf?

[C]

AKA Bob Duka.

[B]

Yeah, what's happening, Wolf?

[D]

Oh, there's a woof. Is my wife texting me? She's like, yeah. She's like, are you going to bring home the, the, the ribs? And I said, I thought I, I, I said I'm going to cook my brisket tonight. I just got this big green egg. And I'm like, hey, I'm smoking tonight. And she's like, but I, I thought the neighbors are coming over. You ever have this thing give a call if you give. The wife's like, hey, the, the neighbors are coming over. And you're like, I just want to hang out with my friend.

[B]

So wait, let me see what your exact problem is. So you got a big green egg. She wanted ribs. But you want brisket.

[D]

I want to smoke that brisket.

[B]

Okay, you want your friends over and she wants neigh. This doesn't seem like just everyone can come over.

[D]

This guy's not married. Give a call if you just. Yeah, if you think that, you know.

[C]

It'S hard when are like. And I think, I think the audience is right now starting to understand like marriage and human relationships so much more than when you normally talk about it, Scott.

[B]

Cuz.

[C]

Yeah, because the wolf is really, he's relatable, full of life advice.

[B]

You know, he's relatable in a way that I'm not.

[C]

Because he wants to be smoking much like the man mask.

[E]

Yes. You have a big green egg. I have bad news. That's not good, you guys.

[B]

What's wrong with the big green egg?

[E]

That's a fairy egg.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[D]

Is it a dragon?

[E]

It could be. Bob. Your wife's going to be really mad.

[C]

Bob.

[D]

I mean, Wolf, chase me around in the frying pan again.

[B]

Bob's not married, by the way. He did offer to marry you People eater.

[E]

That's right.

[D]

But the wolf apparently colliding.

[C]

He does have a ton of marriage.

[B]

Specifics though, which is these marriage.

[C]

And they're right there, they're right at the, at the surface.

[D]

Well, that's the wolf.

[C]

Yeah. That's true. Yeah, I guess. How long has the Wolf been married?

[D]

Wolf and married 23 years to his high school sweetheart.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[B]

Yeah, It's a happy relationship. I can't quite tell. No, it doesn't seem to be.

[C]

What's her name?

[D]

Glare.

[C]

Glare?

[B]

Glare. Like what you do when you're upset.

[C]

With someone, like Claire with a G. Yeah, she's Irish.

[B]

Okay, that explains it.

[C]

Oh, wow. And just out of pure curiosity, Bob, did you ever know someone named glare maybe 23 years ago? Is this a sliding doors situation?

[B]

Who's this person? Glare?

[C]

I think the Wolf might be living Bob's life.

[B]

Life? Oh, my gosh. You mean in a separate dimension or something like that?

[D]

Well, no, she. She was re. She was real. And I.

[B]

She's really.

[D]

I could have chosen her, but I didn't.

[B]

But the wolf is from a.

[D]

She was my elderly piano teacher.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

We were in love.

[B]

She was teaching you elderly piano? Oh, no.

[C]

So what is it?

[B]

What is that? Where you have arthritic fingers.

[D]

All public domain.

[C]

It's just Green Sleep.

[D]

We're Camp Down Races. Ragtag Boogie.

[B]

Yeah. The Entertainer.

[D]

Yep.

[C]

Oh, yes. Maple Leaf Rag.

[B]

Well, good luck.

[D]

I mean, hopefully Shoot a Dog at the Crossroads.

[B]

Sure.

[D]

All those old classics.

[B]

Yeah, hopefully you and Glare will.

[C]

So, I mean, like, if Bob and Glare had worked out, he thinks that his life would be.

[D]

I don't regret a thing. Because that brought you into my life.

[B]

Life, it seems. I mean, you were married to my mother before and divorced from my mother before Glare ever came into the picture.

[D]

No, no. This was 23 years ago.

[B]

You were during the 90s.

[D]

That's right.

[B]

Yeah, I know we're in a sliding timescale here on Comedy Bang Bang, where I've had high school interns who have been in high school for the past 17 years, but we've all turned 50.

[C]

So we all have been exposed to Dread Zeppelin.

[B]

Yes, of course, we. Everyone here has seen the Dread Zeppelin doctor documentary, have we not?

[C]

I have. I don't know if anybody else has.

[B]

Okay. I'm not sure Peter has.

[C]

Peter certainly is too young to have seen the Dread Zeppelin documentary. That's available for free on YouTube.

[B]

Why don't we ask a song of Hope? Why don't we ask our next guest about this? Because I'm pretty sure he might be over 50. He is from America's heartland and it's always an exceptional time here on Comedy Bang Bang when we speak to someone who is from the. The Flyover States, as we call it. Please welcome to the show for the first time, Queasy Jeans. Hey. Hi, Queasy.

[C]

Hey, y'.

[B]

All.

[C]

Hey, Queasy.

[A]

Thanks for having me.

[C]

Oh, it's great. Wow.

[B]

Pleasure. This is Jason.

[C]

Hey, I'm.

[A]

Hi, Jason.

[B]

Nice to meet Peter.

[A]

Hi, Peter. Welcome to America. I hope that you feel comfortable here.

[E]

Thank you, Queasy.

[B]

And this is the Wolf over here.

[D]

Sometimes I'm Bob, but right now I'm the wolf. No, I'm Bob. No, no, I'm the one.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

You're leaking out of your side.

[D]

Oh, that's a vanity colostomy bag.

[A]

Jay.

[C]

How does it fill up?

[D]

Huh?

[C]

How does it fill up?

[D]

They're stations.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Well, Queasy, tell us about yourself. It's so wonderful to meet you.

[C]

Is that a family name? Queasy?

[A]

Queasy? Well, yeah, it's short for quesadella.

[C]

Quesadella, which is quesadilla.

[A]

Well, in America, we call them quesadillas. My. My dad was a big fan of the quesadilla.

[C]

Got it.

[A]

And so named me Quesadella. And I go by Queasy.

[C]

Queasy Jeans.

[B]

Hi, Queasy. So wonderful to meet you. Tell us about yourself. You're. Where are you from? You say you're from America's heartland?

[A]

I'm from America's heartland. Right in the middle of it.

[B]

Right in the middle. Right in the middle of the.

[C]

Right by America's aorta.

[A]

Dead center. You can't go north, south, east, west without being right where I am.

[B]

Wow.

[D]

Is Bruce Springsteen, the president there?

[A]

Well, I just love.

[C]

I love Hannah.

[B]

Him.

[A]

He's so nice. Sometimes he talks a little too much about politics, but I like him otherwise. He looks good in jeans. A lot of people that age don't look good in jeans.

[B]

Yeah. Sometimes when I go see his concerts, I wish I had a fast forward button to just, like, get to the next song. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Or closed captioning.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

I would love to see closed captioning be present at concerts.

[B]

Also, I'd love pause so I could go take a leak.

[A]

You know, I don't know how he does so much running. He always wears boots. I'm like, how are you running so much in boots?

[B]

Yeah, I bet he has, like, he's got a. He's a short king, is he not?

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

I think he's like, oh, he's a little guy.

[A]

He's like 4, 9.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Yep.

[A]

He no taller than a corn husk.

[C]

Yep. Sometimes Clarence Clemens would. Would pack him in the saxophone case. So that Bruce could make entrances and exits easier and, you know, practical.

[B]

Like what Taylor Swift would do in.

[C]

That with the broom closet.

[D]

I heard he sleeps in little Steven Van Zandt's headband at night. It's like a little mouse in a. In a nutshell.

[C]

And I heard they called. He wanted to call Little Steven. Little Steven. To draw attention away from how little Bruce was.

[D]

Little Steven's huge.

[C]

Little Steven is a giant.

[E]

I heard what you guys were saying.

[B]

Oh, thanks, Peter.

[D]

Peter, what are 4 or 5E street band specific to you now?

[C]

And none of them can be about Nils Lofgren.

[E]

I love my friends.

[B]

Make a Gary Talent reference, please.

[E]

I'm hearing all of it.

[B]

So queasy, queasy, queasy. Tell us about yourself.

[A]

Well, you know, I just. I think everyone right now has become like an expert, and they're listening to experts so much.

[C]

Oh, my.

[A]

Why is everyone listening to experts so much? Like, what made experts experts? And I just. I just want people to go back to folksy wisdom.

[C]

Oh, okay.

[B]

Are you sort of in, like, expert in folksy wisdom?

[A]

Well, I'm not an expert expert. I don't pretend.

[C]

So why should we listen to you?

[A]

Well, I just have an opinion about folks, but I think folks in wisdom, I have a. I guess I have an opinionated person. If you ask my family if it's.

[C]

Not an expert opinion, what my opinion, I guess.

[A]

But I don't like to say because I'm modest under the eyes of God and I don't want to be like, I'm more expert than Jesus. So I believe in, like, that there's so much to learn from. From everyday things.

[B]

Okay, so like, what type of booky wisdom? Give us an example.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[D]

I don't know if I want to hear this.

[C]

You don't?

[B]

Wait, is this Bob or Bob or the wolf?

[D]

This is Bob.

[A]

Well, maybe you're afraid.

[B]

Get the wolf in here.

[A]

Thank you.

[D]

Hey, let's hear what some of these dynamite. You know, I think it's good.

[C]

I don't think I've ever heard Bob use the word dynamite. It's incredible.

[D]

Different. No, it's.

[C]

That's what I mean.

[D]

Oh, wait, yeah. Let's see. Let's see. Let's hear some of these.

[A]

Well, there are some things that are just in natural life that you see and you're like, oh, that's just real. And I could learn from it.

[B]

No, we know what you're talking about. Can you give us an example? Yeah. Or do we have to ask another time?

[E]

Oh, wow.

[A]

I didn't know we spoke French.

[C]

You don't have to be such a city slicker.

[A]

Yeah, sorry. Maybe foreign exchange student speaking French like that.

[B]

Sorry, it's C block. And I'm losing my fucking patience with you guys. What's your thing get to this, folks.

[A]

Wisdom.

[C]

Wow. Wow.

[A]

Well, I'll give you an example.

[B]

Okay, please.

[A]

Just because a corn cob can fit your butt.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Doesn't mean it belongs there.

[C]

Oh, interesting. So that is folksy wisdom.

[A]

That's folksy wisdom, huh? So that just means, like, just because something.

[B]

No, we know what it.

[C]

So that is. That is the example.

[A]

That's.

[C]

That's an example for you. The one that really synthesizes the idea. Just because a corn cob fits.

[B]

Listen, it's a Brit.

[A]

No, I didn't say hoe. I'm not pornographic.

[C]

I'm so sorry. Queasy.

[B]

So queasy. Are you trying to say in a larger, more macro sense. Are you trying to say just because something is easy to do doesn't mean. Exactly. It might not be the right choice?

[A]

No, it's not easy to do, but it does fit it.

[B]

Okay, so just.

[A]

Just because it fits doesn't mean it belongs.

[B]

Are you talking really, just specifically about a corn. No, there's also other things that go up someone's butt.

[A]

Well, not necessarily. Just because an ice cream scoop could.

[C]

Fit up your butt. Wait a minute.

[A]

Doesn't mean it belongs. What, an ice cream scoop?

[B]

The scoop?

[C]

Yeah, the scoop. End of it. The handle, I would assume. But the scooper.

[A]

Scooper. That fits. You got to work. Work it.

[C]

Wait, is it one of these? Is it one of these?

[A]

You could do both.

[C]

Oh, this would be.

[D]

Dang.

[C]

I don't want the trigger up there.

[B]

Maybe a mini scoop.

[C]

Maybe a mini scoop.

[A]

You can do all.

[C]

Or a sample spoon.

[A]

Sample spoon.

[B]

You could fit 10.

[A]

But just because you can fit 10 sample spoons in your butt doesn't mean that it belongs. Okay, well, yeah.

[D]

Peters are corn in Oxford. Because I always think of it as American and American vegetable that the Native Americans grew. But do you have corn in Austria?

[E]

What's corn?

[B]

Imagine a golf ball. A miniature golf ball that's painted yellow. Okay. And tiny. Tiny what?

[D]

Oh, Scott can only think in round shapes.

[C]

What are you talking about? Now a tiny.

[B]

Okay, imagine a disease, too.

[E]

Okay, I think I know what corn is now. A little diseased tooth.

[B]

Imagine a diseased tooth, but instead of it being in your mouth. Mouth. To. To bite into things. You bite into it and you swallow.

[C]

How come you don't call Colonel's teeth. How come you don't call them the corn Teeth?

[B]

Yeah. Like Teeth Sanders?

[C]

Yeah. How come they don't call him Teeth? How come it's not. That's a good.

[B]

That's a good question.

[C]

It's. It's private. Lieutenant. Captain. Lieutenant Teeth.

[B]

Does this make sense to you? Queasy Jeans? Yeah.

[A]

I mean, well, we're just talking simply, which is something I appreciate.

[B]

Ye.

[A]

So just because you may know a word doesn't mean you have to say it.

[D]

Is that one of the sayings right there?

[A]

No, I was just sort of saying that generally.

[B]

So you, you like. You prefer to use simple, plain language.

[A]

Simple, plain language.

[C]

What do you do for a living, Queasy?

[A]

Well, I just. I sit on the porch.

[C]

Got it.

[A]

And I. If anyone passes by my yard, I yell at them.

[C]

Great.

[B]

Someone pays you for this?

[A]

Well, no, I'm. I live on. I have a fixed income.

[B]

Okay. Fixed by whom?

[A]

Fixed by my brother. My brother.

[B]

Your brother? Support.

[C]

Wait, when was it fixed?

[A]

Well, he. When he died, he got run over by a tractor.

[C]

Oh, so that. So it was broken and then it got the income. Got.

[B]

At that point, your income was spayed or neutered or.

[A]

Well, yeah, it became fixed so I didn't have to do anything.

[B]

Okay, so you inherited your wealth?

[A]

Well, I. What I did was I became a. A signatory story on his life insurance. So I got his money.

[C]

And I'm assuming because you got the money and the funds were released, there was no foul play suspected in that?

[A]

How could there be?

[C]

Oh, I don't know.

[A]

How could there be?

[C]

I don't know.

[A]

I'm asking how could there be?

[C]

I. I'm asking you.

[A]

No one could figure it out.

[C]

Nobody could figure it out. That's.

[A]

Just because a rocking chair is on the porch doesn't mean that anyone's sitting on. On it.

[B]

Queasy. I guess my question is when you say a porch, you sit on your porch. What? I imagine just a simple shack or something like that. But you inherited your brother's wealth. Like what kind of property are we talking about?

[A]

We're talking about like a, you know, 172 acre farm and wraparound porch. So I can sit all around the. I can yell from every okay side of my.

[C]

And nobody will hear. Like you're that private?

[A]

Well, yeah, it's pretty far.

[D]

But if so, is your house in the middle of a roundabout? Oh, no, you can yell at people all the time.

[A]

Oh, I would love that. Just so I could yell more people.

[C]

But wait, You. So it's not. You would love that, but it's not. Because if you could put a roundabout there, you could just yell the lyrics of the yes. Song roundabout.

[B]

Oh, if you know, then.

[A]

I don't know that. I don't even know those words, what that means.

[B]

Well, I mean, some of them are probably something to the effect of I'll be the roundabout. The words will make you out in it out. I spend the day your way Call it morning driving through the sound and in and out the valley the music dance and sing they make the children really ring I spend your day your way Call it morning driving through the sound and in and out of the valley.

[A]

I don't know. I think that's a little complicated.

[C]

I probably do. I think you do.

[A]

You know what I like? I like it. Just because a light is red doesn't mean you have to stop.

[C]

It does, in fact.

[B]

I mean.

[A]

No.

[B]

If you go by the letter, that is the law.

[A]

Well, but it doesn't mean you have to.

[C]

You know, you do.

[A]

If. Listen, just because the light is red doesn't mean you have to queasy.

[B]

What I. What I am sensing from you is you're just like some rich guy who pays for tickets.

[A]

Hold on a second.

[B]

Who doesn't give a. If you get a ticket going through a red light? Because.

[A]

Who said I'm a guy?

[B]

Oh, queasy, I'm sorry. I. I just wear my hair short.

[C]

Oh, whoa. Okay.

[B]

That's really short, by the way.

[C]

This is like a buzzer.

[D]

You got cuts on your head. You're queasy.

[A]

I'm gonna let it slide. I mean, you may rewind your microphone and just.

[B]

Okay. I beg your pardon. Queasy. I. You're a. How should.

[C]

How should we refer to you as a woman? Okay, cool. No, this is us.

[B]

This is information I need before I introduce someone trying to be better.

[A]

Quesadilla is a female name.

[C]

Oh, boy. I don't know if that's the case. So. Okay, so is. So are. Are certain foods gender.

[B]

Gendered?

[A]

The words are. The food can be. I guess it is folded.

[B]

And technically, because it ends in an A, I think it's gendered as female.

[C]

In the Spanish language. Oh, I see, I see.

[E]

But you. You were saying about it being folded.

[A]

Yeah, because it's folded.

[B]

Yeah, I guess I missed that.

[A]

Yeah, it's folded so you can get into it.

[C]

Okay, so it's not about the.

[B]

Are you saying quesadilla is like a.

[A]

Yeah, I don't use words like that. But it Is like a. A vagina and just.

[C]

Which ends in a.

[A]

Which ends in a. Which means it's for women.

[D]

This is the Wolf. Have you guys heard about this quinoa stuff? My wife got me on this quinoa stuff, and it's some sort of grain with a food. I'm a steak guy.

[C]

Oh, okay. Is this set up for a joke?

[D]

Huh?

[B]

Was that Bob? That was the Bob.

[C]

I wasn't trying to puncture that Bob. It just.

[D]

What do you call. What do you call a rancher with a tractor on his head? Oh.

[C]

What?

[D]

Dead.

[C]

Oh.

[A]

Oh, that sounds familiar.

[D]

Is the Wolf. If you like that joke, give us. Call in right now.

[C]

The Wolf. Do you have any personal appearances coming up?

[D]

I do. I'm going to be at the Sunglass Kiosk at the. At the Arcadia Mall coming up this Saturday. Just hanging out. Nothing.

[B]

Yeah, part of. Did the Sunglass kiosk actually invite you there?

[D]

I'm just trying to get some free wraparound shades.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

You got to talk to Walton Goggins. Yeah, with his Goggins goggles.

[B]

You got to talk to him, Wolf. You got to talk to him.

[C]

Wait, I. Wolf, I'm so sorry, but I need to talk to Bob Duca for a second. Bob Duka. Are you aware of the fact that Walton Goggins has something called Goggins Goggles.

[D]

Goggins Goggles.

[C]

Walton Goggins. Goggins Goggles.

[D]

Oh, no, that's. That's incredible.

[C]

That seemed like information you might need to hear.

[E]

Wow, Bob, I don't.

[D]

He must be really sure he's going to keep working, right, if he's cashing in like this.

[B]

What were you saying, Peter?

[E]

Oh, just Bob. I didn't want to alarm you. You said a curse word in Austrian right now.

[B]

Oh, no.

[D]

Is this going to affect the egg.

[E]

When you said yes.

[B]

Oh, no, that's a curse word.

[D]

That's how a deaf leopard stung.

[C]

But for real, though, we're gonna need you to apologize to the people of Austria for the word you just said.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

Just because it was really. It's apparently really bad one.

[A]

This is what happens. You start apologizing to Austria, then you apologize.

[C]

He is against apologies. Now, this is interesting.

[A]

I just feel like we're apologizing a bit too much.

[B]

So queasy. You're just. You're like a rich Karen who just likes to tell. Tell everybody what they should be doing.

[A]

No, I don't. I just don't think that we should just be going. Be the world's apologist all the time. And be like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I said, you know.

[B]

Have you ever apologized to anyone in your life?

[A]

I've never done anything wrong. What wrong have I done?

[B]

It sounds like you murdered your brother.

[C]

Yes, it does sound like that. He died to inherit his 150 acre ranch.

[A]

172 acres. Just because he died doesn't. And I don't have.

[D]

Is this another one of the things.

[B]

Things.

[D]

Just because. A lot of them start with just because.

[A]

Yeah, well, just because he died and I don't have an aliba doesn't mean.

[B]

And you fit corn cob up your butt.

[A]

I have one. I had to do it just to make sure that. That maxim was real.

[C]

Well, my question again is, what varietal of corn are you using? There are many different corn sizes of ears.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

We use from baby corn all the way up to, you know, grandpa corn. Corn Quite, quite big.

[B]

Yes.

[D]

Grandpa corn and the new metal band.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Grandpa corn with the backwards K.

[A]

We use. We use emperor corn.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Emperor corn. And it's because it's got a little purple in it and it's. It's the largest.

[B]

Well, the thing is, is like, you know, you eat corn with your mouth and it ends up coming out that way. We're not, you know, do the reverse. Maybe you'll start spitting out corn.

[A]

Well, I think you're all missing the point about. It's not about that corn cob going in your butt. It's just saying the maxim, the idea, the colloquialism is that just because you can put a corn cob up your butt doesn't mean that it belongs there. It's easy.

[C]

Sure, it doesn't belong there, but. But sometimes I feel like if it is up there, it feels so good. You might think it does belong there.

[A]

But that is where it.

[D]

Yeah. Tell that butt.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

If it feels good. Yeah. Your butt's gonna be like. This thing belongs here.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Queasy. Tell it to your butt.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Now, I don't talk to my. I don't talk to anything below the. Below the belly button because that's. That's.

[B]

So what do you talk to above the belly button?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

What?

[A]

I talk to my left breast a lot.

[B]

What. What are the kind of conversations?

[E]

Don't go hot. Just you.

[D]

What do you call those if downstairs is a quesadilla.

[A]

What's this we talk a lot about? Why is Bluebuds, Blue Bloods set in New York?

[C]

Oh, of course.

[B]

Where would you prefer Blue Bloods to be set?

[A]

Where I live. In the center of the country. Why do I need to hear about everything set in New York or.

[B]

Well, it seems there's. There's a lot more crime there.

[C]

Yeah, the big cities have quite a bit more crime.

[B]

Varieties of crime.

[A]

Well, we have plenty of crime where I live.

[B]

Yeah, it sounds like your brother was murdered.

[A]

Well, he just died by a tractor rolling over him.

[B]

Who was driving the tractor, if you don't mind me asking?

[A]

You know what? I wasn't there, so I don't know.

[C]

You weren't there?

[A]

I was not.

[C]

So how do you know that's how it happened?

[A]

Because they found him underneath the tractor.

[B]

Okay. And where were you?

[A]

I don't. You know what? That's the funny thing. No one knows.

[C]

That is very funny.

[A]

It's very weird.

[B]

It's humorous.

[A]

I don't have an Aliba and I don't.

[C]

Funny because it's true.

[A]

There's no. Yeah. And I was on the porch as far as I know.

[C]

Oh, so you were on the porch.

[A]

Porch as far as I know.

[C]

Because you said nobody knows. And then you said, as far as you know, you're on the porch.

[A]

Well, nobody knows who ran him over or if he was run over, if he ran over himself or if the tractor.

[B]

You think it was one of these situations where he jumped out of the tractor, lied down in front of it and.

[A]

Well, he used to wear those. What are they called? The AirPods.

[B]

Sure, sure.

[A]

And sometimes. What. Sometimes if you play music too loud on an airpod, it shoots out of your head.

[B]

Head.

[A]

Because the, the. The air sound like what a bat sonar does, and it.

[C]

The.

[A]

The sound bounces off the wall of the ear.

[B]

Okay. And.

[A]

And he may have been like looking to his right and listening to music, and then it shot out and then he was like, oh, my airpod. And ran out in front of the tractor before it ran over the tractor.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Cuz he did sort of a Jeremy Renner situation Classic. Renner, sure.

[A]

He got run over by an ice cream truck or something. And nobody. Nobody's talking about that.

[B]

I don't think it was a snowplow.

[C]

Truck that he himself was driving. So you are correct.

[A]

Yeah, he ran over himself. So why isn't no one saying, what.

[C]

Do you think your brother was listening to that was so important?

[A]

Well, I just want to say this.

[B]

I had nothing club random what I was thinking.

[A]

Well, he's a.

[B]

That's the podcast to listen to if you want to get run over by your own tractor. Yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah, that or Night Cave.

[B]

Two great podcasts.

[C]

They go great together. You got your night cave in my club room. Random.

[A]

He doesn't. You know, no one's ever said, why did you try to kill Jeremy Renner?

[C]

To two Jerry.

[A]

I wasn't there either.

[C]

Oh, oh, to you.

[B]

To you, Jason. Now I'm thinking that for sure.

[C]

She tried to kill Jeremy Renner.

[D]

Did you poison Jamie Fox? Cuz nobody. They keep hinting that something happened and they won't tell us.

[B]

He won't tell us what it was.

[A]

But I don't know who that is.

[B]

Wait, you know very specific details about Jerry Jeremy Renner getting run over by a snowball and you don't know who Jamie Fox Fox is?

[A]

Well, I was Jamie Foxx run over by a heavy piece of mobile machine.

[B]

You only know about celebrities that have been run over by.

[A]

Well, that's what's interesting. I don't care about celebrities. These experts, these coastal elites who believe that they know all of the words in the English language. So I like if they got run over by a tractor or ice cream truck or whatever it was that ran over Jeremy Renner, then I know about that.

[B]

Yeah. It seems to me, if I could speculate, you saw this in the news that Jeremy Renner got run over by his own snowplow. And then a devious plan hatched in your mind to do this to your own brother, which then you did it. You got all the money. You got his 172 acre.

[A]

Why did everyone talk about that? It was just his farm.

[C]

It wasn't.

[A]

Well, it was. But why is everyone just assuming that I could have inherited it from my parents?

[D]

Peter, is it true that Jeremy Rennert shot Hansel and Gretter rich hunter in Austria?

[E]

Yeah, we're all mourning it still. Oh, you mean shot a movie.

[D]

Right.

[E]

But he also killed witch hunter.

[C]

Oh, wow. I can't believe you guys still have witch hunters.

[E]

Yeah, well, for as long as we have witches, we're gonna need the hunters. You guys are there.

[D]

Van helsings there too?

[E]

1.

[C]

1.

[B]

I think Eddie is there.

[C]

And well, Alex maybe. Alex might be. Yeah.

[B]

And maybe Wolfie now I guess probably look queasy jeans. I. It seems to me like you're a murderer and not. I'm not saying that disqualifies you from being on the show. We've had people of all stars and stripes.

[C]

Stars and stripes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Well, just because there's an old saying where I come from.

[C]

Oh, just because there's an old saying.

[A]

What?

[C]

You said just because there's an old saying where I come from.

[A]

Oh, the expert. Just because your brother was.

[D]

I think he's a pert.

[B]

What?

[D]

Say he's a. He's still a pert.

[B]

Yeah, he's a per.

[C]

I haven't stopped being it. So I'm not an expert.

[A]

Oh, there's all this.

[B]

We don't mean to throw you off as so much.

[D]

It seems like funniest joke in the world. Give us call.

[B]

Right.

[A]

You have like Will shorts or something with all your word play.

[C]

Oh, the puzzle. Subscribe to the New York Puzzle Master. Will.

[A]

Never would I never would I subscribe to that rag.

[B]

How do you play the puzzles?

[C]

You just hear him as the puzz on Weekend All Things Considered.

[A]

He was run over by a Zamboni at a New York Islanders game.

[B]

I didn't get this. Oh, this is late breaking news.

[A]

Well, I didn't have it. It happened like in 87 or something.

[C]

Oh, wow. Okay.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So you know about it because of your fascination with people being run over by large machine?

[A]

It's not my fascination, just the news I get.

[C]

Sure.

[B]

Is there a magazine that you subscribe to that only gives you this news?

[A]

Mortal heavy machinery.

[B]

Mortal heavy machinery.

[A]

Mortal heavy machinery.

[B]

It's.

[A]

See that it's.

[B]

Is that a monthly periodic.

[C]

Mhm. It comes up.

[A]

It's monthly. You know, sometimes it's a little thinner and it's sometimes a lot of ads because there's not.

[B]

Not a lot goes on.

[A]

Not a lot goes on.

[D]

Mortal heavy machinery. Is any games at Dave and Busters? Oh yeah.

[C]

It's also a fantastic Lou Reed album. Wow.

[B]

Well, queasy jeans, we. We are running out of time on the show. There's really only time for one final feature and that is of course a little something called plug plugs. Plugs are plugging in the dead of plugs. Take these broken plugs and learn to.

[C]

Plug.

[B]

All your plugs. Just another douchebag who learned how to play Blackbird.

[D]

Scott, is that you singing?

[B]

I don't believe so. That was plugberg by balls McCartney. Thank you so much. Balls with a Z.

[C]

Balls McCartney.

[B]

Balls McCartney. If you have a plugs theme, head over to cbbworld.com and you can find everything you need there to upload your own song or remix one of ours. And what are we plugging? Jay? Hey, what do we got?

[C]

You said this comes out next week. Yeah, so I will plug. Listen, it's old news now, but Taskmaster Season 19 is all available on YouTube. Season 20 has already started and it's also terrific.

[B]

So you know what? I was not looking forward to seeing a different cast because I loved your cast so much and I've watched several seasons, but yours was so special. I was like, well, let's check this out. And it was. The first episode was so funny that.

[C]

So funny.

[B]

Back in.

[C]

Great. It's great. And I will also shout out how did this get made? And dinosaur improv. Two groups that I'm a part of are going on tour. Tickets are [e-mail] probably.

[B]

When you say you're going on tour, how many shows?

[C]

Three, Four.

[B]

Four or five tour. This is. You're doing four or five.

[C]

We're doing. We're doing a handful of. Of dates. You. I mean, you can quibble with the wordage, but you know what I'm saying.

[B]

I do know.

[C]

We're coming to Boston, New York, Philly.

[B]

Please come to.

[C]

Please come to Boston.

[B]

Please. Of course.

[C]

So check that out. Oh, and. And of course, Gabby's Dollhouse.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

I got to shout out, gabby, there.

[B]

Is nothing more important on my daughter's mind than going to see the Gabby's Dollhouse movie with this comes out this Friday. Is that right?

[C]

Yes, sir. Okay.

[B]

Kristen Wiig is in this. And yourself, what character do you play?

[C]

I play Chumsley.

[B]

Chumsley.

[C]

Don't worry.

[D]

Does Chumsley know queasley?

[A]

Queasy.

[D]

Oh, queasy. Sorry.

[A]

Geez, you know a bunch of experts, but it seems that all these experts don't know so much.

[B]

Queasy. Do you have any plugs to make it up to you? We'll give you some plugs here.

[A]

Yeah, there's a Magnum rerun tonight on me tv.

[B]

So you have all the streaming services. You're just like a rich person.

[C]

Is it the two parter where they're having the auction at Robin's estate and one of the items goes. Goes missing?

[A]

No spoilers.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Sassafras. And then what else is happening? Oh, the police are coming by again on Friday to ask some more questions.

[B]

Did this happen recently?

[A]

It happened about six months ago.

[C]

Oh, so very recently.

[A]

Yeah, relatively.

[B]

How soon did you move into the farmhouse?

[A]

Well, I mean, six months ago.

[B]

Like. Like pretty much died dead the day it happened.

[A]

Well, I didn't want the pipes to freeze.

[C]

Who found your brother's body?

[A]

Oh, it was terrible.

[B]

But who?

[A]

Oh, I think, like the crows.

[C]

You think the crows.

[B]

No, but what human found him?

[A]

Well, I think eventually the police found him.

[C]

Eventually.

[B]

Eventually.

[D]

You.

[C]

Did you notice that the crows were very active in that part of the farm?

[A]

Well, I didn't. That farm is so big. I was on the porch and when I was. Because. And then I was. I was like, where is he? And then. I know. And then I don't like to go. It was getting sundown and I don't like to go out into the. Because you can turn an ankle.

[D]

Sure.

[A]

So I didn't go. And so then the police were like, hey, where's your brother?

[B]

Why did they care?

[A]

Well, because someone found. They were like.

[B]

Someone found what?

[D]

They found your dead brother. And then they said, where's your brother?

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

So it all this story is just not.

[A]

Well, you know what this about experts.

[C]

Oh, oh.

[A]

They ask so many questions to get so many answers when the answer's right there.

[C]

Actually, the answer was not there. We did not really get to unanswer. Your lack of specificity is damning.

[B]

Seems like you're making all this up as you go along.

[A]

Which just because.

[B]

It also seems like you're making up these maxims as you don't is open.

[A]

Doesn't mean you have to jump through it.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

That's not a bad one, actually.

[C]

Actually kind of works.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

There you go.

[B]

Well, all right, Queasy. Let's turn to Peter Strusel. Peter, what do you want to plug in?

[E]

I'm seeing plugs.

[B]

Yes, yes. Electrical plugs, but I guess what. Do you have any projects coming up or any. Any things you're listening to that you want to talk about?

[E]

Oh, well, you know what? This final season of Solar Opposites coming to hulu on premiering October 13th.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Very cool. Great animated comedy on Hulu. And I believe, if I'm not mistaken, it's going to be coming to Netflix at some point.

[E]

I'm hearing that too as well.

[C]

So if you.

[E]

Yeah, you guys.

[B]

Okay, okay. That's fantastic. And then the Wolf and. Or Bob Duka, what would you like to.

[D]

This is the Wolf. I'm going to be throwing out the first pitch at the Havana Bananas game coming up. This is a guy's a really funny, really taking a lot of fun with baseball. I'm also going to be a guest on a comedy bang Bang podcast called Collegetown. It's really terrific.

[B]

Oh, you're going to be a guest on it. Uhhuh. Okay. That'll be an incredible episode.

[D]

It's going to be a great episode.

[C]

I can't wait to tune into that episode.

[D]

Yeah. And this is Bob. I'm. I'm going to Dave and Busters in a minute.

[C]

Oh, again, you're going back.

[D]

I'm going to try to eat the Right side of the menu.

[B]

Oh, that was just the left side.

[C]

You shouldn't do that.

[D]

I. I have to.

[B]

Okay, well, check back in with us.

[C]

When you just remember you came out with quite a few maladies after the last.

[D]

I did so many. And I'll also be marrying Peter.

[E]

Oh, that's amazing, you guys.

[C]

And will become a prince, I believe.

[D]

That's right.

[C]

Wow. Royalty.

[D]

That's right.

[B]

Congratulations. Well, I want to plug jealous Scott. I'm not really jealous. What a bobber of peace. Peter over here.

[C]

Well, that Bob's attention will now be elsewhere.

[B]

Oh, no, no, no.

[D]

I do have a quick favor, though, Scott.

[B]

Okay, sure.

[D]

This is actually for Peter and I. Will you sit on our fairy egg for a while? Glad you said airy egg fairy.

[B]

When you said can you sit on my. I was. I was worried. Sure. Yeah.

[D]

You can't afford these. Mustache rights. I'm a prince now.

[A]

That's the.

[B]

Sure. I'll do whatever you need. Look, I want to plug head over to cbbworld.com we have some great stuff coming up in October, a couple of really cool things happening, and other good shows like Scott hasn't seen where I watch movies with Sprague, the Whisperer, and ad free episodes of this show. Every single live episode we've ever done. The entire back catalog is here. Plus shows like Collegetown Neighborhood Listen is coming back this month.

[C]

I'll shout out, hey, Randy. And I believe. Peter, is it possible you were an intern who took an improv class from Will Hines at some point on the Heinz I'm proved to meet you podcast?

[E]

That's right, you guys.

[C]

Oh, that's right.

[B]

I heard that episode. That was you.

[C]

Very funny episode of that podcast, which is very easy to find by its name.

[B]

Yes, Heinz, I'm proud to meet you. Of course, it just rolls off the tongue. All of that more is over [e-mail] all right, let's close up the old pluck bag.

[C]

Open up the plug back 20, 25.

[B]

I'm talking.

[C]

Open up the dark bag.

[B]

Then you are alive.

[D]

Open it up and make your dreams come true. And open it up and let yourself be truth. You got to open up and see all of us because it's not time to close it up just yet. I said it's not time to close it up just yet.

[B]

All right, that was.

[C]

Oh, could it go on longer? Do you think it could slowly go on.

[B]

That one was only 38 seconds, Jason. That's actually shorter than once.

[C]

Such a plodding tempo.

[B]

Okay, well, it was Plug the magic bag on by Lot. Haha. So thank you so much to Lot. Haha. And I want to thank all of you. Jason, always a pleasure to have you back.

[C]

Thank you, Scotty.

[B]

What.

[C]

What an absolute delight.

[B]

Wonderful to have you here. And look, Peter Streusel. Congratulations. And I hope the 21 of you can stay in the country for as long as you like. Thank you, Scott and Queasy Jeans. Hi, Queasy Jeans. I don't know how I feel about you. I feel like everything you've said has been a lie.

[A]

That's. Just because someone says a lie doesn't mean it's not.

[B]

Not true. Oh, wow. No. Okay. All right, sure.

[C]

That's interesting.

[B]

And then, of course, I never thought.

[C]

Of it that way.

[B]

Bob or the wolf? Who am I talking to right now?

[D]

Uhhuh. Let's. This is. Let's go get a beer after this. What do you think?

[C]

Oh, wow.

[D]

This is Bob.

[B]

I mean, honestly. Oh, this is Bob. I was gonna say the wolf.

[D]

I kind of get a drink with the. You can get a drink with the wolf. Hang out with Bob.

[C]

Oh, gosh, I don't.

[B]

I'd rather do the opposite. Like, travel there with Bob. Bob get. You know, order the drink, and then suddenly the wolf appears.

[D]

Well, this is wolf. Anytime. If you just Bob. I'll speak for Bob.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

He. He. He just wants to hang out.

[B]

Okay, well, I. I like you better.

[D]

Maybe give a piggy back to Bob. Give a piggy front to Bob.

[B]

Oh, what's a piggy for? I care. I embrace him from. Okay, well, I don't have time for this. We're gonna be back next week. We'll see you then. Oh, Gecko, I just love being able.

[E]

To file claim in under two minutes.

[B]

With the Geico app. Could you sign a. Sign what?

[A]

The app.

[B]

Yeah, sure. Oh, it rubbed off the screen when I touched it.

[C]

Could you sign it again?

[A]

Anything to help, I suppose.

[C]

Get more than just savings.

[D]

Get more with Geico.

[C]

Adam Pally here, and I'm John Gabri.

[B]

We're a couple actors and best friends who you may know as the host.

[A]

Of the TV show One on 101.

[B]

Places to Party before you die. Now we're bringing you a comedic look at health and wellness with our new show, Staying Alive.

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We'll have guests like our friend, actor.

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Gillian Bell, Dr. Dolittle. Staying Alive with John Gabris. And Adam Pali is out right now.

[C]

Get them a week early and ad free with Sirius XM podcasts plus on Apple podcasts.

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