Bonus Bang: Andy Daly, Tim Baltz (Nutz 4 Snutz)

Summary

Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast – Bonus Bang: Andy Daly, Tim Baltz (Nutz 4 Snutz)
Release Date: February 27, 2025
Episode: 576 – "What the Sound Made"

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Introduction

In this special bonus episode of Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast, host Scott Aukerman revisits a classic episode from December 2, 2018, titled "What the Sound Made." This installment features beloved characters Randy Snuts (played by Tim Baltz) and Joe Bongo (played by Andy Daly). As the show celebrates its 15th year, listeners are treated to a nostalgic yet fresh conversation that delves into quirky anecdotes, imaginative storytelling, and humorous exchanges between the hosts and their eccentric guests.

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Revisiting Joe Bongo’s Classroom Adventures

Joe’s Unique Teaching Methods

Scott Aukerman kicks off the episode by reintroducing Joe Bongo, an educator at Marina Del Rey High School who teaches health and sex education with a twist—his indispensable bongos.

[04:37] Joe Bongo: "I brought my bongos."

Joe emphasizes the importance of music in engaging students, stating:

[18:09] Joe Bongo: "I talk a lot about how music can help people get in the mood and how help people get sort of in touch with their bodies."

Despite his unconventional methods, Joe's passion for teaching shines through, even as he navigates challenges such as being unable to conduct driver's education after an infamous car accident.

The Infamous Car Accident

Joe recounts the catastrophic accident that cost Marina Del Rey its historic lighthouse and led to his inability to teach driving classes.

[09:12] Joe Bongo: "I destroyed a great many things in and around Marina del Rey."

Scott humorously draws parallels between Joe's accident and stunt choreography, referencing Hal Needham of the "Smokey and the Bandit" fame.

[10:19] Joe Bongo: "I guess so, yeah."

This segment cleverly blends absurdity with real-life consequences, highlighting Joe's resilience and continued dedication to his students.

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Introducing Randy Snuts

Randy’s Troubled Relationship

The episode takes a deeper dive into the tumultuous relationship between Randy Snuts and his girlfriend Carissa. Randy speaks candidly about Carissa's "scandalous behavior" and the resultant chaos in his life.

[37:04] Randy Snuts: "I'm like, miserable right now. Just like a rotting corpse in front of me."

His humorous yet relatable struggles paint a vivid picture of relationship woes, complete with playful banter about texting mishaps:

[37:37] Randy Snuts: "She stole my phone and texted all my friends, fuck you."

Career Misadventures and Window Washing

Randy shares his misadventures, including getting fired from an ampm for stealing High Life beer and his subsequent involvement in a family friend's window washing business.

[34:00] Randy Snuts: "We've got Ezra Palmer, who's father Emerson, Emerson, Lake and Palmer."

The conversation seamlessly transitions between Randy's personal life and his professional escapades, maintaining the show's signature irreverent humor.

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Podcast Pitch Segment: "I'd Hit It" and "What the Sound Made"

Randy’s Creative Endeavors

Randy introduces his podcast concept, "I'd Hit It," which revolves around listeners sending objects for him to hit with a bat and then discussing the ensuing sounds.

[58:43] Randy Snuts: "It's called I'd Hit It. And it's audio of me hitting a. Like. Like, people would tweet at me objects, and then I would get that object, and then I would hit it with the bat."

Scott critiques the feasibility and practicality of the idea, noting potential financial pitfalls if expensive items are requested.

[58:57] Scott Aukerman: "If people are just like, hey, a Lamborghini. And then you have to buy a Lamborghini and hit it with a baseball bat."

Despite the playful skepticism, the segment underscores the show's commitment to fostering guest creativity, even if it borders on the absurd.

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Musical Interludes and Alternate Universes

Imaginative Storytelling

The conversation takes a surreal turn as Joe Bongo narrates an ongoing imaginary story involving wizards, dwarves, elves, and ghost ships.

[51:14] Joe Bongo: "The ship was a ghost. The ship was a ghost."

This segment showcases the characters' ability to weave intricate and fantastical tales, blurring the lines between reality and imagination.

Alternate Reality Discussions

Scott and Randy engage in speculative conversations about alternate universes, touching on popular culture references like Tom Petty and Mike Judge.

[63:29] Randy Snuts: "He'll be back, and he doesn't talk about it. It's not a big thing."

These dialogues highlight the show's penchant for blending pop culture with offbeat humor, keeping listeners entertained with unexpected twists.

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Recurring Themes and Humorous Antics

Bongo Zones and Protective Casts

Joe humorously discusses his "bongo zone" and the preventive casts on his legs, which are both a testament to his dedication and a source of comedic relief.

[05:08] Joe Bongo: "To keep, just to keep from being beaten."

The ongoing gag about Joe's inability to run due to his casts and his reliance on his bongos adds a layer of absurdity to the narrative.

Running Gags and Catchphrases

Throughout the episode, recurring jokes about bongos, protective casts, and Randy's last name ("Snuts") maintain a consistent comedic thread.

[32:08] Joe Bongo: "What's happening? What's going on?"

These elements ensure that long-time listeners have familiar touchpoints, while newcomers are drawn into the show's unique humor.

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Engaging Audience Through Interactive Segments

The episode encourages audience participation through imaginative podcast pitches and hypothetical scenarios, fostering a sense of community and involvement.

[65:12] Randy Snuts: "What the sound made."

This interactive approach not only entertains but also invites listeners to envision themselves as part of the show's quirky universe.

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Concluding Remarks and Future Teasers

As the episode wraps up, Scott hints at future episodes and events, maintaining excitement and anticipation among listeners. The playful banter between Scott, Joe, and Randy ensures that the audience leaves with a smile, eager for more comedic escapades.

[73:09] Randy Snuts: "If you edit this out, you're a fucking coward."

The episode concludes on a high note, blending humor with heartfelt moments, encapsulating the essence of Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Joe Bongo on Bringing Bongos:

  [04:37] Joe Bongo: "I brought my bongos."

• Randy on Stolen Phones:

  [37:37] Randy Snuts: "She stole my phone and texted all my friends, fuck you."

• Podcast Pitch Critique:

  [58:57] Scott Aukerman: "If people are just like, hey, a Lamborghini. And then you have to buy a Lamborghini and hit it with a baseball bat."

• Joe on Protective Casts:

  [05:08] Joe Bongo: "To keep, just to keep from being beaten."

• Alternate Universe Musings:

  [63:34] Randy Snuts: "They're going to cover the friends."

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Conclusion

This bonus episode of Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast masterfully blends nostalgia with fresh humor, delivering a rich and engaging listening experience. Through the dynamic interactions between Scott Aukerman, Joe Bongo, and Randy Snuts, the show offers a tapestry of comedic stories, imaginative pitches, and unforgettable quotes. Whether you're a long-time fan or a newcomer, "What the Sound Made" promises laughter, absurdity, and a glimpse into the wonderfully weird world of Comedy Bang Bang.

Transcript

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[Scott Aukerman]

This episode of Comedy Bang Bang is brought to you by Progressive, where drivers who save by switching save nearly $750 on average plus auto customers qualify for an average of 7 discounts. Quote [e-mail] to see if you could save Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates national average 12 month savings of $744 by new customers surveyed who saved with Progressive between June 2022 and May 2023. Potential savings will vary. Disc not available in all states and situations hey everybody, Scott Aukerman here and welcome back to another Bonus Bang. Of course, Bonus Bangs are where we revisit old episodes of Comedy Bang Bang. And this is the second edition of our current series entitled Nuts for Snuts. And that is featuring the character Randy Snuts, played of course by Tim Baltz, whom you may know from the Righteous Gemstones. This week is episode number 576 titled what the Sound Made. This was originally released on December 2, 2018 and of course it has the titular Randy Snuts as well as Andy Daly playing Joe Bongo. And in this episode, Joe Bongo shares how he incorporates his bongos into sex ed classes and Randy talks about the infamous Carissa. Now don't worry, we'll be hearing more about Carissa in later episodes of this series. Now, if you like what you hear and you want to hear the entire CBB archive, you can become a [e-mail] where you can find every single episode we've ever recorded, as well as every live episode we've ever done. We are going to have a new episode of Comedy Bang Bang out on Monday. Until then, enjoy this bonus.

[Joe Bongo]

Comedy Bang.

[Scott Aukerman]

Come Stepped on a banana peel and slid into your DMs. How was your dad's funeral baby? Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang. Ah yes, thanks to John Wilkes Sound Booth for that catchphrase admission. And welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another edition. And what a show. I know I tend to slip into hyperbole when I talk about these shows. As if. I mean, look, I can't tell the future. I don't know if it's going to be a good show. Whenever I say what a show. But with absolute certainty, I can tell you that today's show is going to be a real, real corker because we have two returning guests. A little later, we'll have a good friend of the show is going to return to let us know what he's up to. And before that, we have another returning guest. And this is exciting because you know that I am, I'm a fan of educators. And by the way, I'm Scott Aukerman. I don't know if I said that, but that's me, a fan of educators. SCOTT aukerman, fan of EDUCATORS I believe a young mind is, is something supple that needs to be shaped and molded and played with. And I think that our country's educators, and in fact the world's educators are doing a job that needs to be done. And certainly you can tell it needs to be done because we pay them to do it. So there's proof right there that it is a necessary job. So we have one of those on the show today. He's been on the Comedy Bang Bang program previously. He's an educator. He teaches health at Marina Del Rey High School. And please welcome back to the show Joe Bongo. Hi.

[Joe Bongo]

It's great to be back. Look, I brought the bongos, too.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yay.

[Joe Bongo]

I brought my bongos.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, I would expect nothing less from Joe Bongo.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, bring it wherever I go, you know, because, you know, now people know me now because I'm doing all these podcasts and everything. People find out I'm Joe Bongo. They said, well, play the bongos, you know, we gotta hear some bongos. And now, and if I don't have them with me, people get so mad.

[Scott Aukerman]

So upset, I would imagine. I mean, yeah, that's like I've been.

[Joe Bongo]

Brutally beaten for not having my bongos on me on a number of occasions. And so now it's really just a fear based situation.

[Scott Aukerman]

I wonder. Both of your legs are in. They look to be casts.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, those are preventive casts.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh.

[Joe Bongo]

To keep, just to keep from being beaten. You know what I mean?

[Scott Aukerman]

It's like wrapping it in Kleenex and pillows and stuff.

[Joe Bongo]

It's like that, I guess, but they're casts. I mean, I went to the emergency room and I asked to have cast put on my leg just as a preventive measure to not be hit with any.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's like if you were to see Kevin Bacon and he didn't have fresh, you know, slices of bacon. Cooking, cooking. Up on the grill, you'd be very upset.

[Joe Bongo]

You'd be furious. That probably is a real problem for him. If I saw Kevin Bacon and he wasn't serving up bacon, I think I'd probably hit him in the legs.

[Scott Aukerman]

Probably.

[Joe Bongo]

You know what I mean?

[Scott Aukerman]

Are you primarily beaten below the waist always?

[Joe Bongo]

Well, because I say not above the waist.

[Scott Aukerman]

Not the money maker.

[Joe Bongo]

Not the money makers. Because in my hands and my arms I need to play bongos.

[Scott Aukerman]

Of course, of course.

[Joe Bongo]

And of course, you know, facial expressions and things like that are very much as.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's part of the bongo experience. Oh my God, look at these facial expressions. He's doing them. Oh God.

[Joe Bongo]

I mean, it's so much of it. You're telling a story when you're playing the bongos.

[Scott Aukerman]

True. Do you also tell stories while you play the bongos?

[Joe Bongo]

I sometimes tell stories to myself while I'm playing the bongos.

[Scott Aukerman]

In your head?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. Right? Uh huh. Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Say them out loud. Sure.

[Joe Bongo]

Once there was a wizard and he lived in a forest and nobody liked him. And he climbed to the top of a mountain and destroyed the world.

[Scott Aukerman]

Tale of the unpopular wizard.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow.

[Joe Bongo]

And it's, you know, I mean, people don't think about that. If you knew a wizard, like a.

[Scott Aukerman]

Real wizard, wouldn't you want to befriend him? If he could destroy you, you might. But you, you probably would invite him to parties and he would be like one of those people like, well, we have to invite.

[Joe Bongo]

That's what I'm saying. It would be disingenuous because I don't think you would like that guy.

[Scott Aukerman]

Probably not.

[Joe Bongo]

Walks around doing magic tricks and stuff like that.

[Randy Snuts]

Why?

[Scott Aukerman]

Does he? Yeah, I mean, you don't like magicians, Just in general.

[Joe Bongo]

Who likes magicians? I never met anybody that liked a magician.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, never?

[Joe Bongo]

No.

[Scott Aukerman]

So I mean, imagine that for real, you know. Why? What is he compens that he has to learn all these magic tricks?

[Joe Bongo]

Exactly. And not only that, but you feel threatened. He could turn me into a frog or whatever. You know what I mean?

[Scott Aukerman]

You don't want someone holding that over your head.

[Joe Bongo]

Of course not.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, it's like the me too movement in a way. If someone has that kind of power over you.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, We've been talking a lot about consent in my health class. You know, I teach sex ed at Marina del Rey High School.

[Scott Aukerman]

I didn't know it was sex ed. I thought it was just health.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, I have a sex ed unit. I have a drugs unit.

[Scott Aukerman]

Drug ed unit. This is like law and order. The svu.

[Joe Bongo]

What do you mean by that? It is a lot. Well, we do talk a lot about law and order in there and.

[Scott Aukerman]

What, me? Not the show, Just.

[Joe Bongo]

No, the show. Yeah, yeah. Cause I love that show.

[Scott Aukerman]

Listen to this.

[Joe Bongo]

Shonk.

[Scott Aukerman]

Shonk.

[Joe Bongo]

Hey.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow.

[Joe Bongo]

That's wild. Yeah, I thought. Where are we now? Now, where are we?

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, you know, I'm carrying something back and forth out on the docks and letting you know that I found a body.

[Joe Bongo]

Isn't that funny? If a cop came to talk to me at my workplace, they would have my undivided attention.

[Scott Aukerman]

We're doing John Mulaney bits at this point.

[Joe Bongo]

Are we? I think that's.

[Scott Aukerman]

I believe we are.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, that's too bad.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's too bad. But it's what happens.

[Joe Bongo]

It's what happens when you consume no culture. You know what I mean? There's a good chance that you're gonna repeat anyways. What?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, we do a sex ed unit.

[Joe Bongo]

And we do a drug ed unit.

[Scott Aukerman]

Do you bring in people in this unit? Co teachers, or. When you say unit, what do you mean? Do you mean, like actual units of grades or.

[Joe Bongo]

No, during the year, my health curriculum. The curriculum is made up of units. There's units in the curriculum. There's a drug aid unit.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, I see.

[Joe Bongo]

And I'm not allowed to do the driver ed unit anymore.

[Scott Aukerman]

Why? What happened?

[Joe Bongo]

Well, it's. You know.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, I don't know. You said you know, but I actually don't know, which is why I asked.

[Joe Bongo]

I was involved in the most expensive car accident in the history of Marina del Rey.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait a minute. Expensive car accident? Is this something like Smokey and the Bandit Moves or something?

[Joe Bongo]

Absurd. It's absurd. I don't know how you even. How you even tabulate that or what. But anyway, I destroyed. I destroyed a great many things in and around Marina del Rey.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's an expensive area for one.

[Joe Bongo]

Well. Well, you know. Yeah. Yes, the historic lighthouse.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, no.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, I hit that and it went into the marina.

[Scott Aukerman]

It toppled into the marina.

[Joe Bongo]

Toppled into the marina.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh.

[Joe Bongo]

And I said, that's bad luck. I says, big deal, you know, Just fish it out of there. And they. Well, that's a whole thing, you know, so they're going to rebuild it, but whatever.

[Scott Aukerman]

So they're not fishing it out.

[Joe Bongo]

They're going to leave it on the bottom of the. They said it's easy to leave it there. I don't know.

[Scott Aukerman]

Isn't it weird that they call it fish out when there's fish in the ocean?

[Joe Bongo]

I don't get It. What do you mean?

[Scott Aukerman]

Like, what if you were to fish something out? It almost implies that you're commanding the fish to push it up out of the ocean.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, that's not a bad idea. I mean, I'll pitch it at the next town council meeting. I'm there all the time anyway. These days. I'm constantly going to the town council meetings just, you know, because people have questions for me. But.

[Scott Aukerman]

So you. You were. You were involved in some sort of Hal Needham esque.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't know who that is.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay. Yeah, he was the stunt coordinator for a lot of the Smokey and the Bandit films.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, really? Ye.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. So you're involved in an accident, the type of which he would choreograph?

[Joe Bongo]

I guess so, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, a lot of things were destroyed. Apparently I did $18 million worth of damage to the dog run at the Chase Burton Park.

[Scott Aukerman]

How can you do that much damage?

[Joe Bongo]

Great question.

[Scott Aukerman]

Were you traveling with some sort of priceless artifact?

[Joe Bongo]

No, the issue. Well, I was asleep. I was sound asleep for the entire. So I can't even tell you what happened.

[Scott Aukerman]

This is why the accident occurred. Because you fell asleep.

[Joe Bongo]

Because I fell asleep. And I don't have. Also, by the way, have never had a driver's license, so it turned into a whole thing. And so I have. Now I'm not allowed to teach driver ed unit anymore.

[Scott Aukerman]

Are you still in charge of the parking lot?

[Joe Bongo]

Parking lot security? Yes, I do parking lot security at Marine Deal. Right. High school.

[Scott Aukerman]

So you have to. If there's ever an altercation, you have to outrun a car.

[Joe Bongo]

What do you mean?

[Scott Aukerman]

An altercation with someone, you know, involved in a car.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, you're saying two cars are buying over the same parking lot or something?

[Scott Aukerman]

Like someone is like stealing a car. Your parking lot security, all you just have. It's a foot race.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, I am a parking lot security man who cannot drive, does not drive. That is the case. That's. That's how it is. And I tried to skateboard for a little while and it was terrible because I can't do it with the cast. So I like. Oh, yeah, he's a thigh high cast.

[Scott Aukerman]

Hard to ollie. Those are. Yeah, they are thigh highs, I noticed.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. So you can't. Just can't do it. So anyway. And it's very hard to get around in general, but I do still do py lice. And anyway, but what I'm really excited about.

[Scott Aukerman]

Sex ed.

[Joe Bongo]

Yes, we do sex ed unit.

[Scott Aukerman]

Sexual education.

[Joe Bongo]

Sexual education. We talk about all aspects of sex. I say hey, there's nothing. Nothing's off limits. You know, whatever questions you have, that's.

[Scott Aukerman]

Not what you're teaching, that nothing's off limits.

[Joe Bongo]

Nothing's off limits when it comes to sex. Absolutely.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, you don't teach.

[Joe Bongo]

No, no, no.

[Scott Aukerman]

What that means. Nothing's off limits is in the classroom. You can ask anything. Not that. When you actually go out there and engage in sex.

[Joe Bongo]

That's not true.

[Scott Aukerman]

Nothing is off limits.

[Joe Bongo]

That's not true. Now I have some limits as to the questions that can be asked. No, but you're saying, sexually speaking, nothing is off limits.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, no, Nothing's off limits.

[Joe Bongo]

If you can dream it, please do it. That's not good advice is what I say. Yeah. And we've been talking a lot about, you know, consent and the whole me too business and all that stuff.

[Scott Aukerman]

And what are you teaching them?

[Joe Bongo]

I've just been saying, like, don't let anybody hold you back, you know, dear. You know, because you only live once, you know, it's that kind of thing. So I'm very much a Carpy DM teacher. I'm very much a. What was that? A Poet Society guy. I tell them, you know, a lot of the time I have my students stand on the desks and call me Captain, and it's very inspiring.

[Scott Aukerman]

Why are you having people stand on the desks, by the way? Do you have mirrors on the floor?

[Joe Bongo]

Not anymore. I don't do that anymore. That's. You're going back to the 80s. I don't do that anymore. Forget it. Now it's cameras.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Oh, dear. Were you filming this car chase, by the way? Maybe you could sell this to, like, Michael Bay or something.

[Joe Bongo]

I did have a dashboard cam, but it's at the bottom of the marina. Oh, yeah, the car is gone.

[Scott Aukerman]

But anyways, was it an expensive car? Is that also what added to the tally?

[Joe Bongo]

No, not at all. No. My car was the least of the expenses. Oh, yeah, yeah. Chunky old thing, you know. Anyways, so now somebody else teaches driver. But what I'm very excited about, you know, I have my own podcast and I made a pilot. I made a PIL podcast pilot.

[Scott Aukerman]

I heard something about this. Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

And it's. You can hear it on Stitcher or whatever. And it's there. And I'm, you know, and from what I understand, you're the guy that's going to decide whether it gets to become a regular podcast.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, I'm hoping. You know, I wanted to have you on the show so I could tell.

[Joe Bongo]

You, no, you gotta be Kidding. That's not true. Can't be. No, the answer can't be.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, I wanted to do it in person.

[Joe Bongo]

What are you talking about?

[Scott Aukerman]

I'm not a coward.

[Joe Bongo]

What?

[Scott Aukerman]

No, I wanted to do it face to face. I don't believe.

[Joe Bongo]

Are you seriously telling me no?

[Scott Aukerman]

I'm telling you no. Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

Really?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

I'm sorry.

[Joe Bongo]

Why not?

[Scott Aukerman]

I'm shocked.

[Joe Bongo]

I'm shocked.

[Scott Aukerman]

What was the premise of your show again?

[Joe Bongo]

The show is called Driving and Fucking with Joe Bongo and Margot Chunk. And we take questions from people about fucking questions and driving questions.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. No, I didn't.

[Joe Bongo]

Margo's a new driving dj.

[Scott Aukerman]

I did not enjoy this. What do you mean?

[Joe Bongo]

We did a great job. I said it was Dr. Ruth meets Car Talk.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, No, I know, but they had a terrible meeting as far as I'm concerned.

[Joe Bongo]

Dr. Ruth and Car Talk.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. They should never have hung out.

[Joe Bongo]

You know, the three of them hooked up.

[Randy Snuts]

Up.

[Joe Bongo]

That's. Yeah, that's true.

[Scott Aukerman]

Insane.

[Joe Bongo]

That's true. It was the two brothers. The two brothers and they.

[Scott Aukerman]

They did a train on Dr. Ruth, Dr.

[Joe Bongo]

Roof. That is true. That's a fact.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh my God.

[Joe Bongo]

That's true.

[Scott Aukerman]

Just high fiving over the back.

[Joe Bongo]

From what I understand, from.

[Scott Aukerman]

From the precious few details that are out there. From what I understand, that is one of the few that leaked out.

[Joe Bongo]

I am told there is a tape. I don't know.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, wow.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't know. But anyway, I know for a fact that it happened.

[Scott Aukerman]

Incredible. So by the way, for people who have not heard you on the show before, Joe Bongo is a stage name.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, yeah, my name is Joe Dunleavy is my real name. But all my students call me Joe Bongo because I always bring my bongos in the classroom and I teach with the bongos and I play and I go into. I go into a bongo zone for sometimes if it's a 45 minute period, 20 to 40 minutes of it could be me in a bongo zone.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's a lot like watching a Doors concert where they'll start a song and who knows when it's gonna end, who knows what's gonn.

[Joe Bongo]

Or whether Jim Morrison is even gonna show up. And a lot of the time I do not show up for my own classes.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right.

[Joe Bongo]

And it's just.

[Scott Aukerman]

That doesn't surprise me.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. You know, because I don't have any reliable way of waking up.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. We talked about this before, right? What's up with your clocks and your.

[Joe Bongo]

I have no internal body clock. That was one of the first things to go.

[Scott Aukerman]

Do you have an operation?

[Joe Bongo]

No, it's just I. Look, I consider myself a drug survivor. A lot of people consider me a drug casualty. A lot of.

[Scott Aukerman]

A lot of people consider a drug.

[Joe Bongo]

User, currently a current drug user. That. I hear that a lot from people and, you know, I mean, I think it's not fair because I'm not doing the hard stuff at this point.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, Just. What are you up to?

[Joe Bongo]

It's mostly just acid.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right.

[Joe Bongo]

It's just, you know, which is nothing.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's not hallucinogenics. Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

It's not even a drug, so.

[Scott Aukerman]

So that got rid of your internal body clock at some point.

[Joe Bongo]

My internal body clock was one of the first things to go, yes. As well. As well as just any kind of a concept of time at all.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right. So you may currently be in a bongo zone.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't know. I mean. Yes.

[Scott Aukerman]

Even though you're not playing the bongos?

[Joe Bongo]

I mean, I never thought about that.

[Scott Aukerman]

Are you playing the bongos?

[Joe Bongo]

I don't think I am now.

[Scott Aukerman]

I don't think you are either.

[Joe Bongo]

Okay, good. But if my bongos.

[Scott Aukerman]

Are we both high right now?

[Joe Bongo]

I don't know.

[Scott Aukerman]

I'm not sure.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't think I'm high. You know, the brain is quad. There's four quadrants of the brain.

[Randy Snuts]

Sure.

[Scott Aukerman]

Anything has four quadrants. If you break it up into four parts.

[Joe Bongo]

That's interesting.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

Could you break, like a Hostess cupcake into four quadrants?

[Scott Aukerman]

Sure. Anything.

[Joe Bongo]

It's not a bad idea because I don't want a whole one of those.

[Scott Aukerman]

This is simple fractions. Do you teach fractions, by the way?

[Joe Bongo]

No, only in regards to sexual partners.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, but are these four quadrants labeled different things in the brain?

[Joe Bongo]

All I'm trying to tell you is that a doctor told me that two of my quadrants are gone.

[Scott Aukerman]

Just gone.

[Joe Bongo]

They're gone.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really? What do you have floating in there permanently broken?

[Joe Bongo]

I have two. I have two functioning brain quadrants at this time.

[Scott Aukerman]

And the other two are missing.

[Joe Bongo]

The word he used was broken.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, so they're in there. They're just not working, I guess.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, I think they're. Oh, yeah. Nothing's been taken out of my head.

[Scott Aukerman]

They're sloshing around in there.

[Joe Bongo]

They're in there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

They haven't dissolved.

[Joe Bongo]

They're not functioning as designed. Yeah, but. And so of the two remaining quadrants, it's possible at any given time that one of them or both of them might be high.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right. Okay.

[Joe Bongo]

That's my Only, that's all.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, good luck with that. So how do you incorporate the bongos into your sex education?

[Joe Bongo]

Well, I talk a lot about how music can help people get in the mood and how help people get sort of in touch with their bodies.

[Scott Aukerman]

Bongo music.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, brother. Listen, I go out on the weekends. I go out to the beach, out to the pier, and I play my bongos and you can just sing. Which pier is this? I often go out to Huntington Beach.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay. I mean, it's a little. It's close to Marina Del Rey.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, close.

[Scott Aukerman]

Ish. Yeah, right.

[Joe Bongo]

No, I'm fairly Persona non grotto and.

[Scott Aukerman]

Marina Del Rey in Marina del Rey.

[Joe Bongo]

At this time, this whole thing has to blow over. Yeah, I took out too much stuff that people like.

[Scott Aukerman]

Also, the lighthouse being gone. Are ships crashing constantly into the marina?

[Joe Bongo]

It's extremely dangerous at night and during foggy conditions.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, those are prime lighthouse times.

[Joe Bongo]

What they got now is they got a guy out there on a ladder with a flashlight.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, no.

[Joe Bongo]

And it's just a community volunteer situation and it's not effective.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay. How often are they able to get a guy out with the ladder if it's a volunteer situation?

[Joe Bongo]

These are seniors, you know what I mean? They've got a little phone tree going for when it's gonna get dark. You know, usually it's sundown. Well, they're not that organized. I mean, at this point, it gets dark and they start scrambling like, you know what I mean?

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, it's go time.

[Joe Bongo]

It's a problem.

[Scott Aukerman]

Let's put something together.

[Joe Bongo]

It's a problem. But you're right, it is Predictable the Darkness.

[Scott Aukerman]

But that, by the way, could be your autobiography.

[Joe Bongo]

It is Predictable the Darkness by Joe.

[Scott Aukerman]

Bongo or your next pilot.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't have to make it. Are you really not picking up? Driving.

[Scott Aukerman]

I'm not picking up.

[Joe Bongo]

I'm surprised.

[Scott Aukerman]

Let's talk about the bongo. So pretend I'm your class, okay?

[Joe Bongo]

Sure.

[Scott Aukerman]

And I'm interested in learning how to have sex and what it feels like. And take me through how you incorporate the bongos.

[Joe Bongo]

I would say, look, you gotta. The sex is all about the hips. You gotta get those hips moving. And nothing is gonna get the hips moving better than a little something like, let's see those hips. And then I get everybody up. Everybody up on their feet, and we clear this.

[Scott Aukerman]

Do you want me to stand up?

[Joe Bongo]

Stand up, stand up. Get those hips into it. That's pretty good.

[Scott Aukerman]

I'm trying.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. A little more.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Okay. Is this enough?

[Joe Bongo]

No, that's not enough.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's not enough?

[Joe Bongo]

No. It's not gonna please a woman. You gotta really get those hips into it. I wanna see some hips.

[Scott Aukerman]

I guess this is a lot like. This is a lot like having sex.

[Joe Bongo]

Yes, yes. See that? That's what I'm telling you. And then you get you and a partner both getting your hips into it like that. Next thing you know, we're into the pregnancy unit.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, is there is an entire pregnancy unit.

[Joe Bongo]

We talk all about pregnancy and how and whether you can have sex with a pregnant woman. That's mostly what the pregnancy unit is.

[Scott Aukerman]

And let me guess, There. Nothing's off limits?

[Joe Bongo]

Nothing's off limits. Do whatever you want. You know, I write that on the chalkboard the first day I write Joe Bongo.

[Scott Aukerman]

Joe Bongo, do whatever you want. Is that instruction for you or for the students?

[Joe Bongo]

It's both. And routinely, every year, as soon as I'm done writing, do whatever you want, about a third of the class gets.

[Scott Aukerman]

Up and leaves, and the other two thirds are looking around like, was that okay? Should I follow?

[Joe Bongo]

Right? And they're asking themselves, what do I want? And then we spend the rest of the year exploring that question.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow.

[Joe Bongo]

The other ones knew what they wanted to go, and that's fine.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's fine.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, this.

[Joe Bongo]

And they get an A.

[Scott Aukerman]

The ones who stayed are the ones who left.

[Joe Bongo]

The ones who left get an A because they know what they want and they do it.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

And I appreciate that.

[Joe Bongo]

That's an A.

[Scott Aukerman]

What do the ones who stay get?

[Joe Bongo]

It depends, you know, Then it's a whole process of figuring that out, you know, But a lot of.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, you're talking about grading students.

[Joe Bongo]

Huh?

[Scott Aukerman]

You're talking about grading students. A process of figuring out what grades they get.

[Joe Bongo]

Yes, yes, exactly. But if you left on day one, then there was nothing to figure out. That's an A.

[Scott Aukerman]

So that's a good little tip for any students coming into your class if they're listening to this.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, if you want to go, you should go.

[Scott Aukerman]

What if you don't want to go? And you go. Are you able to ascertain that if.

[Joe Bongo]

Somebody is going against their will to go?

[Scott Aukerman]

It's hard to imagine, like, someone forces another student to stand and pushes them out of the room. What do you grade that student on?

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, the one that got pushed out.

[Scott Aukerman]

Of the room because they don't want to go, but they win.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. That person. I would have to flunk them. I've never had it happen, but if it happened, I would have to. That person would get it in.

[Scott Aukerman]

Look, I mean, it's a hype hypothetical.

[Joe Bongo]

But it's a good one, though. It's a good one. And also, we talked about this before, but, you know, I'm in a band.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, right. What's the band called again?

[Joe Bongo]

Rosebush Red. And I'm the bomb.

[Scott Aukerman]

Rose Bush Red.

[Joe Bongo]

Rosebush Red. And everybody else in the band is.

[Scott Aukerman]

A student or was a student?

[Joe Bongo]

Well, no, they're current students.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, that's right. And you keep flunking them in order to keep them in the band.

[Joe Bongo]

Yes, if I have to. If, if. If this person is irreplaceable to the band and they're graduating. Because I'll tell you, I'll tell you right now, a lot of these guys say I'm gonna graduate, but I'm still gonna be in the band. And I've learned by now that that's bullshit. They're gone. I don't have control over them anymore. So I often have to flunk them out of health just to keep them back.

[Scott Aukerman]

You're using your position of power in order to make them do things that they don't want to do.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't think of it that way, but I'm using my position of power to keep them in my band.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay. You know, so who's in the band currently right now?

[Joe Bongo]

It's an incredible lineup of. Everybody in the band right now is the son of a famous prog rock musician.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's incredible.

[Joe Bongo]

It is incredible.

[Scott Aukerman]

So they, these prog rock musicians all moved to Marina Del Re school district.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

And their. Their sons or offspring. Sons or daughters.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Are serving in your band. Who do we have?

[Joe Bongo]

We got Ezra Palmer, who's father.

[Scott Aukerman]

Emerson, Emerson, Lake and Palmer. Oh, my goodness.

[Joe Bongo]

Gary Lee, who is the son of Getty Lee.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, from Rush.

[Joe Bongo]

From Rush.

[Scott Aukerman]

We got a guy, Canadian, so he moved down to the States.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, A lot of these guys, most of them are not in touch with their fathers, by the way.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay. Yeah. Rock music. Enough said.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, exactly. It's an itinerant lifestyle.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

And there's another guy named Joe. Phil Collins Jr. I remember who his father is.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, well, from Genesis, his father was Phil Collins.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, oh, Lily.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, so this is Lily Collins's brother.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, I don't know. His name is Phil Collins Jr. I think his father was Peter Gabriel.

[Scott Aukerman]

That would be. I mean, I can see that.

[Joe Bongo]

Because I think. Didn't it work that sort of like.

[Scott Aukerman]

A fuck you to Phil Collins? Like, I got there first, didn't I?

[Joe Bongo]

Forget how it worked.

[Scott Aukerman]

That would Be the ultimate thing to do to a friend of yours.

[Joe Bongo]

What's that?

[Scott Aukerman]

To name your kid, like, say, who's your best friend?

[Joe Bongo]

I. You, I think.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, well, but if I were to, like, have a kid and. Nate, name him Jason Manzukas Jr. And say, Ah, I got there first.

[Joe Bongo]

That show be great.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's a fun, fun thing to do.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. But I think what happened with that band. I think Peter Gabriel became Phil Collins.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, so. So these three are in the band. You have Phil, you have Ezra.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

And you have. Who? Who? Lee. What was the.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, Gary Lee.

[Scott Aukerman]

Gary Lee. Okay.

[Joe Bongo]

Lee's kid.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right. And does. Does Gary Lee play bass? Like, Getty does or.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, I. Yeah. Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay.

[Joe Bongo]

And they're great. And they were. They were an existing. They had a really good drummer, and I had to get him out of school. I had him.

[Scott Aukerman]

I had him expelled. Wait, who was that drummer?

[Joe Bongo]

That guy. He was Dean Buford. Bill Buford's kid.

[Scott Aukerman]

I don't know Bill Buford.

[Joe Bongo]

Bill Buford from Yes.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay. I'm not as familiar with all of the various permutations of yes. As perhaps you are.

[Joe Bongo]

You're not as familiar with Anderson, Buford Wakeman and how.

[Scott Aukerman]

I mean, I pretty much know the 80s years where they had Trevor Horn in the. There.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, yeah, yeah. No, he's not.

[Scott Aukerman]

The commercial years.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, forget it. Good song, though.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Can you play it on the drums? Why did you.

[Joe Bongo]

Owner of a Lonely Heart.

[Scott Aukerman]

Better than a. Yeah. It was very odd that you went with your mouth and you have the drums right in front of you.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, you got to work it out in your mouth first.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay. Is that something you teach the sex education unit?

[Joe Bongo]

That's what I say. I say, guys, work it out in your mouth first.

[Scott Aukerman]

You gotta lick it before you kick it. Because if you kick it and then you lick it, who's interested?

[Joe Bongo]

Then lick it before you kick it. I never heard that. I like that a lot. I think that's good enough.

[Scott Aukerman]

You can use that.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, I'm gonna use that. That's good. Well, that's gonna. You know what? That's gonna be the whole month of April.

[Scott Aukerman]

How many classes are you gonna show up for in the month of April?

[Joe Bongo]

There's no way of ever knowing. But it is nice. The weather is nice.

[Scott Aukerman]

The weather's really nice. That's prime surf and skating time.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, it's hard to, you know. It's hard to make it to class.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, Joe, it's a pleasure to have you.

[Joe Bongo]

It's great to be here.

[Scott Aukerman]

We need to take a break. Okay. If that's all right. Can you stick around? We have another returning guest whom I don't believe you've ever met.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't know. I don't know if I'll be here or not.

[Scott Aukerman]

I think. I mean, you're just sitting in your seat. You haven't left.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't have any plans to proactively do anything.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, I mean, you don't want to leave because you haven't gotten up and left.

[Joe Bongo]

So is this the do whatever you want situation?

[Scott Aukerman]

It is.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, then, here we go.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, we need to take a break. When we come back, we'll have more Joe Bongo and, oh, our good friend Randy Snutz is going to be here. We'll be right back with more Comedy Bang Bang after this. This episode of Comedy Bang Bang is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all in one website platform for entrepreneurs. Oh boy. We're having entrepreneurs back on the show and they are going to use it. They. It. It helps entrepreneurs stand out out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or you're managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience and sell anything from products to content to time, all in one place, all on your terms. You can get 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain at squarespace.com Bang Bang Squarespace payments is the easiest way to manage your payments in one place. With Squarespace, onboarding is fast and simple. Get started in just a few clicks of the dear mouse, my dear boy, and start receiving payments right away. Plus, give your customers more ways to pay with popular payment methods like and Here we go with them. They're going to sound made up, but maybe you know what they are. Klarna Ach Direct Debit in the US Apple Pay Afterpay in the US and Canada and Clearpay in the UK Squarespace. Look, what do I need to say about them? We've been using them now for it feels like I know it's over a decade. I think we did all the earwolf websites with Squarespace. They're the best. Check out squarespace.com for a free trial and when you are Ready to launch squarespace.com Bang Bang will save you 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain.

[Joe Bongo]

Thanks.

[Scott Aukerman]

Squarespace Is your child struggling with a specific subject or need help with their homework? Well, IXL Learning is an online learning program for kids. It covers math, language arts, science and social studies. Now if your Child is struggling. This is the smartest investment you can make. Let's contrast this. A single hour of tutoring costs more than a month of IXL. One subscription gets you everything. And IXL is used in 96 of the top 100 school districts in the U.S. my child is not old enough to study these things yet, but by all accounts, school has gotten even harder than when I was in there. Every kid needs help and this is the perfect way to do it. Make an impact on your child's learning by getting IXL now and Comedy Bang Bang listeners. You can get exclusively 20% off IXL memberships when you sign up [e-mail] Bang Bang. Visit ixl.com Bang Bang to get the most effective learning program out there at the best price. Thanks ixl. You know, when you own a business, you gotta wear a lot of different hats. You know, the pirate hat, the fancy top hat. No, no, no. I mean all the roles you have to play when you run a business, even if tech isn't your thing. Kinsta's managed WordPress hosting is a relief. Their expert team, they. They handle it all. What they've done is they've bundled up all the essentials to make sites stress free with speeds that will wow your visitors, security that never sleeps, and a dashboard. Oh, this dashboard. Oh, it's so intuitive. You'll wonder why everything isn't this easy. Imagine your site, okay, running at warp speed. Just by switching to Kinsta. Your website could run up to 200% faster. And if you ever need help, you'll get real WordPress pros, not these AI chat bots. Experts who respond in minutes and tackle even the trickiest problems. No script scripts, just actual people who know their stuff. They want to help. Are you tired of being your own website support team? Switch your hosting to Kinsta and get your first month for free. And don't worry about the move. They'll handle the whole transition for you. No expertise in the tech sector required. All you have to do is visit kinsta.com/bang to get started. That's K I N s t a.com/bang comedy Bang Bang. We're back here. Joe Bongo has been playing the bongos this entire break and neighbors have been complaining. And he's in a bongo zone. He is really in it.

[Joe Bongo]

What's happening? What's going on?

[Scott Aukerman]

You've been playing the bongos for the last 10 minutes.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, 10 minutes.

[Scott Aukerman]

10 minutes. That's all it's been? Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

Wow. Okay. How, how was it? Really good. Right.

[Scott Aukerman]

10 minutes of bongos is like 80 minutes of any other instrument.

[Joe Bongo]

Thank you. Yes. That's interesting. Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Is it?

[Joe Bongo]

You pack a lot in.

[Scott Aukerman]

You do. We have to get to our next guest, Hot Dog? No, it's not Hot Dog. Have you ever met him?

[Joe Bongo]

Who?

[Scott Aukerman]

Hot Dog?

[Joe Bongo]

No.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, he's a really interesting guy. He skates or. No. What does he do? He water skis on salamis.

[Joe Bongo]

I think I'd like to beat him.

[Scott Aukerman]

You like to beat him?

[Joe Bongo]

I'd like to beat him. I'd like to meet him and beat.

[Scott Aukerman]

Him in a water skiing competition.

[Joe Bongo]

I'd love to beat him in a water skiing competition.

[Scott Aukerman]

Have you ever water skied? It would be hard with those thigh beats.

[Joe Bongo]

I'd probably be fine. I'd probably be very good at it.

[Scott Aukerman]

You probably could ski on those thigh high casts.

[Joe Bongo]

I think it would not be. Yeah, I think it'd be easy.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Okay.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, I was told not to get them wet, but who gives a shit?

[Scott Aukerman]

They're just protective anyway.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, exactly.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, well, let's get to our next. Maybe you'll meet Hot Dog at some point. I think that would be fun. Sure. We do need to get to our next guest. He has been on the show before. I don't recall his particular details of what he does for a living, but we'll talk about that. Please welcome back Randy Snuts. Hello.

[Randy Snuts]

What's going on, Scott? And, like, you're right to not, like, keep up with my job because yet again, I've been fired and fired at another job.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, what were you doing, by the way? Talk right into that.

[Randy Snuts]

Am I. Is this better?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, that's a little better.

[Randy Snuts]

All right. I had, like, positioned the microphone so that I could see your face and now it's directly in front of your face.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, that's okay.

[Randy Snuts]

So if you do any funny reactions, I'm not even going to be able to see what you're.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, I mean, you want to be able to see Joe Bongo's face because.

[Joe Bongo]

When I play the bongo, you really got to see my face.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, exactly, dude.

[Randy Snuts]

To be a fly on the wall. Wall in the bongo zone.

[Scott Aukerman]

You. I mean, yeah, you don't have to be a fly on the wall. You can just be yourself.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, but I was just.

[Scott Aukerman]

You watching, it was like.

[Randy Snuts]

I was like Jeff Goldblum. I was on the wall as a fly.

[Scott Aukerman]

Brundle Fly?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, Brundle Fly. You love that movie, dude, I love it. I want to see that movie at your house.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, thanks. But what what job did you get fired from?

[Randy Snuts]

Very cool. Remember I was working at the ampm.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, that's right. The Anti Meridian and the Post Meridian.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, that's right. The one that sells gas, right?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

And then has a convenience store inside. And I mainly, like, kept that thing stocked.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's right.

[Randy Snuts]

And I got busted because I stole another 18 pack of high Life.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, that's right.

[Randy Snuts]

This time I said yoink too loud.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's right. That was the tip off that your people would know that you stole something when you said yoink under your breath to yourself.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, exactly. But I got cocky and I said it too loud while making eye contact with my boss.

[Scott Aukerman]

Who's your boss again?

[Randy Snuts]

Just a fucking guy. I forget his name.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, so, yeah, you're already. It's in the rear view at this point.

[Randy Snuts]

I don't. But then, like, I got hooked up with a friend of a family. This guy, Brian Delahoyd is one of my good friends and his dad, Dan Delahoy, runs a window washing business.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay. Windows of buildings or of cars?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, buildings. Cars. Like if someone lives in their car and they need their windows washed.

[Scott Aukerman]

If it's glass, you'll do it.

[Randy Snuts]

That's true. Dude.

[Joe Bongo]

You're going to be one of those guys going up the side of a building on a. Like a wooden thing and going up to the building.

[Randy Snuts]

Jesus. I mean, I'd pass out. I have like.

[Joe Bongo]

Sounds scary, right?

[Randy Snuts]

Dan Del Hoyt has not entrusted me with that yet.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, so your first floor only?

[Randy Snuts]

First floor only. Just, like retail shops and, you know, cars and whatnot.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

So if it were a 18 wheeler, that's a little too high for you.

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, dude. Yeah. I mean, I could get up there. Someone gave me a step ladder, right?

[Scott Aukerman]

Maybe one of these old people down at the Marina. Del Pier.

[Joe Bongo]

Del Ray Pier.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

They. They've got a lot.

[Scott Aukerman]

They would have to be during the day.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, yeah. I'd climb up on these.

[Joe Bongo]

Seniors got to bring their own ladder, by the way. And it's not.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's a BYOL situation.

[Joe Bongo]

Byol. And it's not fun watching these old guys trying to, you know, carry their ladder from the parking lot.

[Scott Aukerman]

They just keep a ladder there where the lighthouse used to be.

[Joe Bongo]

Somebody would steal it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Keep a ladder there where the lighthouse used to be.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, that's beautiful. Was that for Team Dragons?

[Scott Aukerman]

Keep the ladder there where the lighthouse used to be. This is not bad. I might be in your band soon. I'm. I'm not the offspring of any Famous musician, though.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, yeah, I just have.

[Randy Snuts]

You have to still be in high school to be in your band.

[Joe Bongo]

It works the best way because then you have a little more control over their schedule. You can give them a hall pass and whatnot to come and rehearse.

[Randy Snuts]

That's too bad. I barely graduated high school, so I'm probably.

[Scott Aukerman]

You did graduate, though.

[Randy Snuts]

I did, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

By the skin of your teeth.

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, dude. Yeah, absolutely.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. How long, how old of a man are you?

[Randy Snuts]

I'm. I'm 26 right now, right?

[Scott Aukerman]

Right now. Yeah, sure. We all get older as the days go by.

[Joe Bongo]

That's a good point. You're not going to be 26 forever. That's true.

[Randy Snuts]

We'd love to be 20.

[Scott Aukerman]

Unless you die at 20. 26 and then you'll be 26 forever.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh.

[Scott Aukerman]

I always wonder when they say, like, happy birthday to Shakespeare, first of all, how happy is it going to be? He's dead.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, he's not having any.

[Scott Aukerman]

He's probably had happier birthdays when he was alive. But it doesn't. It also doesn't work like that. Like, people don't get to be 200 years old or whatever. Like, happy birthday to my dad who died 20 years ago. He would have been 153 today.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, I know. He wouldn't have been miserable.

[Scott Aukerman]

Those details are maybe a little.

[Randy Snuts]

God, I wish my dad we're still alive. I'm like, you know, miserable right now. Just like a rotting corpse in front of me.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right. So you could be 26 forever. Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

If you die this year. Well, good luck.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, I've been looking forward to it. Definitely. My girlfriend is wishing my. My death every single day.

[Joe Bongo]

Why?

[Scott Aukerman]

Who's your girlfriend again?

[Randy Snuts]

Remember Carissa?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

She of the scandalous behavior.

[Scott Aukerman]

She was scandalous. I do recall that.

[Joe Bongo]

What do you mean? What did she do?

[Randy Snuts]

She just always like, breaks and like catastrophe to my life.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, really?

[Randy Snuts]

Sowing seeds of discord in my personal and professional business.

[Scott Aukerman]

So. Yeah. What are some of the shenanigans she got up to?

[Randy Snuts]

She stole my phone and texted all my friends, fuck you.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh no. That's too bad.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. And then they. They all texted back, hahaha, good one, Randy. And then she texted back, I'm not kidding. And that was scandalous.

[Scott Aukerman]

That second text was scandalous because then.

[Randy Snuts]

My boys were like, oh, dude, Randy wasn't joking around.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

So is that the kind of joke you would normally do?

[Randy Snuts]

Hell yeah. Text someone, Fuck you, dude.

[Joe Bongo]

I got very, very funny.

[Randy Snuts]

I get my jollies.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

I get my Jollies however I can.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, that's it. One has to get your jollies however.

[Scott Aukerman]

You can in this economy.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, no kidding.

[Scott Aukerman]

So has she been out there on the town doing anything with other dudes or anything? What was your problems with her before?

[Randy Snuts]

I mean, aside from just, like, general scandalous behavior? Yeah, she talks to, like, a lot of people. She likes to string guys along to, like, rile me up and get me, like, all psycho.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right? Yeah. So she likes to flirt with other guys in front of you in order to test your love?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Like, if you don't fight for her, then you don't care enough.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. Like, her dream scenario would be, like, cuckolding me, but I will not have it.

[Scott Aukerman]

And describe cuckolding for where she, like.

[Randy Snuts]

Hooks up with a dude in front of me, and then, like, ostensibly, I enjoy it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Why ostensibly? Is that part of the cuckolding experience?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, I think that dude has to, like, enjoy his humiliation.

[Joe Bongo]

Okay, so would you be pissed off if she, like, hooked up with another guy and they had a kid and she named that kid, whatever Your name is, Junior.

[Randy Snuts]

Randy Snotts Jr. Honestly, I'd try to adopt that child to stick it to them.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

You'd have a pretty good claim on that adoption in court.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, yeah. I mean, of course. This is my child.

[Joe Bongo]

Look at the name.

[Scott Aukerman]

Look at the name right there. Yeah. Case closed. Dismissed.

[Joe Bongo]

Case dismissed.

[Randy Snuts]

Objection.

[Scott Aukerman]

Sorry, but we said dismissed.

[Joe Bongo]

Habeas corpus.

[Scott Aukerman]

You got to get it in there beforehand.

[Randy Snuts]

I've been sustained.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's not a bad title for your autobiography.

[Randy Snuts]

I've been sustained.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. By Randy Snuts.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, By Randy Snotts and the cops.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yep. So have you been in trouble with the law recently?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, dude, I kicked out my tail lights in a fit of rage. The cops keep pulling me over. No. And then I have to explain it. I'm like, I kicked him out myself because of my girlfriend's scandalous behavior.

[Scott Aukerman]

What happened? Why were you so upset?

[Randy Snuts]

Well, Carissa texted my mom you.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, so it was not relegated to just your friends?

[Randy Snuts]

No, no. And then. And then my mom wrote back, hahaha. And she wrote back, I'm not kidding. And then my mom wrote back, hahaha. Because she knows that.

[Scott Aukerman]

She knows. Yeah. That's the kind of joke that you'd press it a little too far.

[Randy Snuts]

But, like, I have a great relationship with my mother, and she thinks anything I say is funny. God bless her when she goes, oh, man. When she.

[Scott Aukerman]

No one loves you like your loved ones.

[Randy Snuts]

No one loves you.

[Joe Bongo]

That's nice. That's very pretty. Pretty.

[Scott Aukerman]

Let's put that to bongos. No one loves you like your loved ones. You don't sing, I noticed. You just play bongos.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

And tell stories to yourself.

[Joe Bongo]

Sometimes. You know. Sometimes.

[Scott Aukerman]

Let's do that again with you telling the story, and I'll sing over it.

[Joe Bongo]

Okay.

[Scott Aukerman]

It'll be sort of like a rap song with a sung hook. All right, here we go. Ready? And no one ghost.

[Joe Bongo]

The ship was a ghost.

[Scott Aukerman]

No one loves you, you loved one. Not bad.

[Joe Bongo]

Not bad at all.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

I think that this is sort of.

[Scott Aukerman]

Like a Rihanna Eminem kind of.

[Joe Bongo]

A Rihanna Eminem kind of, dude.

[Randy Snuts]

I, I, that's the kind of relationship I have with Carissa because she, like. I love the way she lies.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Just. She tells untruths. Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

And then I'm left being like, window pane.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, window pane.

[Randy Snuts]

I know why they call it window pane, which is funny because now I wash windows.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right? Yeah. You actually wash wind window panes.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. Eminem doesn't realize that, like, the way you spell pane when you say window pane is P A N, E. He thinks it's P A, I, N. He thinks.

[Scott Aukerman]

When he hears window pane, he thinks it's P A I, N. Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

He was doing a Reddit AMA and I busted him on that question.

[Scott Aukerman]

What's your Reddit name?

[Randy Snuts]

My Reddit name?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

Randy Snotts. All caps.

[Scott Aukerman]

Does that make a difference, the all caps part of it?

[Randy Snuts]

No, it's. I mean, it is an all caps, but I put all caps after Randy.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, I see. Randy Snuts. All caps.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay. Yeah. I'd love to see you out there on Reddit just posting away, because when.

[Randy Snuts]

I'm online, I'm shouting.

[Scott Aukerman]

So. But you love Carissa.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, I love her. I mean, it's a love hate relationship.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. How long have you been together?

[Randy Snuts]

We've been together, like, three years now.

[Scott Aukerman]

How many times has she cheated on you?

[Randy Snuts]

Jesus, I don't know. Once for every day in the year. So what's 365 times? 3.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's over a thousand.

[Randy Snuts]

Jesus Christ. Is a bad relationship.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. No, you're.

[Joe Bongo]

She really gets some action every single day.

[Randy Snuts]

I don't know. I mean, I think a lot of it's my paranoia and her trying to drive me nuts, you know, because we live in a small town and there are.

[Scott Aukerman]

What town do you live in?

[Randy Snuts]

Well, right now, Alhambra.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

East side or die, dude.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

You want to stay There, then.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, I want East Sider.

[Scott Aukerman]

Why'd you say right now Alhambra then, if you're never going to leave?

[Randy Snuts]

Well, we're living at Carissa's ex stepmom's place.

[Scott Aukerman]

By the way, anytime you say right now, I get that you're currently somewhere right now. You're currently 26. You're currently living in Alhambra. When one asks, where do you live? They don't expect the answer of everywhere you have lived and everywhere you're going to live. They just want to know where you live currently.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, that's what we're talking about right now, for sure.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. So what was this about your mom?

[Randy Snuts]

No, no, not my mom. Chris's ex.

[Scott Aukerman]

Chris. Ex stepmom.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

You and Karisha are living together with her ex stepmom?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, yeah, her ex stepmom. Judy.

[Scott Aukerman]

Judy. Okay, so she has no current relationship with Judy other than friend?

[Randy Snuts]

Not really. But Judy's like a really nice lady. She's a judge out in Alhambra.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, really?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, we just.

[Joe Bongo]

Judge Judy.

[Scott Aukerman]

Judy.

[Randy Snuts]

No, she goes by her last name.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, what's her last name?

[Randy Snuts]

Judge.

[Scott Aukerman]

Judge. Judge.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, Judy Judge.

[Scott Aukerman]

Like Mike Judge?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, like. Yeah, she's related to Mike.

[Scott Aukerman]

She's related to Mike Judge.

[Joe Bongo]

And she is a judge.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, she is.

[Joe Bongo]

That's wild.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's why. That's like Kevin Bacon cooking up that bacon. Yeah, I guess you'd be upset and want to beat her if her name.

[Joe Bongo]

Was Judy Judge and she wasn't around judging things. She would take a close to the legs.

[Scott Aukerman]

Not the money maker. Not. Not the gavel hands.

[Joe Bongo]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Randy Snuts]

This lady does Krav Maga, though. She'd kick the out of me.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Muay Thai. Tan Tai.

[Randy Snuts]

Muay Thai.

[Scott Aukerman]

Muay Thai.

[Randy Snuts]

Muay Thai.

[Scott Aukerman]

Is that what it is?

[Randy Snuts]

Don't mind if I do.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, Randy, I guess if people saw you and you weren't Randy all the time, you'd get a beating as well.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, that's true. I mean, people try to, like, deliver beatings on me pretty consistently. Yeah, because I shoot my mouth off, you know?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, you run hot.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, if I've got a filter. I don't have a filter.

[Scott Aukerman]

But if you did have one, it would be inoperable. Is that what you were trying to say? It would be too leaky.

[Randy Snuts]

I got a broken filter on my face.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, you can cut those into four, by the way, in the quadrants.

[Joe Bongo]

You can quadrant your filter. Yeah, that's not a bad idea. So you can. Sometimes you can use it. I'm just using a fourth of my filter right now. You know, I don't want to use the whole thing, dude.

[Randy Snuts]

Like, I can sing, I can talk in four octaves, but I only choose this one.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really? But. Okay, let's hear another one, though.

[Randy Snuts]

I mean, I'm out of practice.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, I mean, you have a very steady. If I were to make musical notes, if I were to transcribe the musicality of your. The rhythm of your speech, it would be pretty much a flat line.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Tell a story.

[Joe Bongo]

There was a dwarfs who were really good at bows and arrows. They were on an adventure across the.

[Scott Aukerman]

Field, by the way, I've noticed. Show that a lot of your stories have to do with mythical adventures of wizards, dwarves.

[Joe Bongo]

That's what I'm heavily into these days.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really? You're in. You're into fantasy?

[Joe Bongo]

I'm into fantasy and stuff like that, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

What kind of author? Who are your favorite authors?

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, I don't read books.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh. Just creating it.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I do my own. Yeah, I'm very into. You know, I've been getting heavily into Jethro Tull. I write a letter a day to Ian Anderson.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow. And have any of them ever been returned?

[Joe Bongo]

Return? No. What do you mean? In the sense that somebody wrote me.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Or the postman returns them.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, yeah, that I've been getting. But the first one, I did get a little something like a little join our fan club thing like that.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay.

[Joe Bongo]

But that was like a form letter. And then I got very angry because that seemed. Because I wrote him a very, very personal letter. I really put it all out there. And then to get a form letter back. So from then on, the letters have been fairly hostile.

[Scott Aukerman]

And what are the kind of personal details you've included about your own life, about your feelings for Ian Anderson?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, mostly about my own life and about different things that I have done to the tune of different Jethro Tull songs and things like that. And it's been very, very sexually explicit. I've been writing Ian Anderson some very sexually explicit letters.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

And then to get back a form letter. It's very insulting.

[Scott Aukerman]

Anything about the Jesus Christ Superstar soundtrack?

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, what about that?

[Scott Aukerman]

I believe he's on that.

[Joe Bongo]

Isn't he thinking of Ian Gilliam? Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay. I thought they were both on that.

[Joe Bongo]

No, they might be the same guy.

[Scott Aukerman]

They might be, but have you ever really met two different people with the same name? You know what I mean? Oh, like I've. I don't Think I've ever met another Randy? I don't. I certainly have never met another Joe.

[Joe Bongo]

Right.

[Scott Aukerman]

You know, you hear about them on the news or whatever, but have you ever really met one?

[Randy Snuts]

My mom's name is Randy Snotts.

[Scott Aukerman]

What?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, Randy with an I. Oh, okay.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, yeah, that makes sense. You can spell it differently and that's.

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, you want it to be spelled exactly the same.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, exactly.

[Randy Snuts]

Dude. I'll search the earth for another Randy Snot. Snots.

[Scott Aukerman]

It doesn't have to be Snuts either, dude.

[Randy Snuts]

Sign up for my Patreon.

[Scott Aukerman]

You have a Patreon?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, where I travel the world looking for another Randy Snuts.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay. How much are you asking for?

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, 10 bucks. Each? No.

[Scott Aukerman]

Each what? Each, Randy.

[Randy Snuts]

Or as long as it's less than 27. Just like Bernie.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, just like Bernie.

[Randy Snuts]

Keeps it pure.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, is that right? Hey, Bernie Sanders doesn't want a contribution over 27.

[Randy Snuts]

Well, I don't know. That was his M.O. a while ago. I don't know what the deal is now.

[Scott Aukerman]

Modus operations.

[Joe Bongo]

Whoa.

[Randy Snuts]

That was another.

[Scott Aukerman]

That was really.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Let's get it.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, nice.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait a minute. The elves made an airplane.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

So there's modern technology with. In these stories.

[Joe Bongo]

These are exactly. A modern airplane.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay. So it was like a Wright Brothers type situation.

[Joe Bongo]

That kind of a thing. But mostly made out of.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, one of those things when you go to the Museum of Aviation, it's like flapping wings and.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, but I'm picturing more of a Gilligan's island type of thing because they had to use what was available in the forest.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, Franz.

[Joe Bongo]

Franz. A lot of Franz.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Franz.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, dude.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's not called business.

[Joe Bongo]

It's not called business. You know, I auditioned for that show.

[Scott Aukerman]

Did you? Which part?

[Joe Bongo]

I auditioned for Chandler. Really?

[Scott Aukerman]

25 years or so ago.

[Joe Bongo]

Whatever. I used to be an actor.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really? Did you see anyone else in the waiting room?

[Joe Bongo]

Bruce Willis.

[Scott Aukerman]

So he auditioned for the part of Bruce Willis back before the show came out?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. They make you do that.

[Randy Snuts]

People don't know that he was auditioning for himself on the show Friends?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

And then they wrote Bruce Willis off?

[Joe Bongo]

I guess so.

[Randy Snuts]

Too many white people. We can't have Bruce Willis on here, too.

[Joe Bongo]

That was a lot of white people, wasn't it?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. That's a little too many.

[Randy Snuts]

Sexual.

[Joe Bongo]

Too many.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Would you say sexual?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, sexual. Sexual.

[Joe Bongo]

Sexual.

[Randy Snuts]

Six white people together.

[Scott Aukerman]

Strange credulity, you know? Yeah, yeah. It doesn't make sense to me.

[Randy Snuts]

And they lived across the hall from each other. That's the thing. I do not want to know my neighbors.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, that's a good point.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right?

[Joe Bongo]

You don't want to know your neighbor because you stuck with those people.

[Scott Aukerman]

I couldn't. I could never figure out on that show, were they friends because they met each other because they lived across from each other? Or did they like each other so much and they were such good friends that they moved into the same building together? Was that ever established?

[Randy Snuts]

I mean, I think some of them knew each other previously. Like Ross used to have it for Rachel and then.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right.

[Randy Snuts]

Obviously Ross and Monica.

[Scott Aukerman]

Sure, they know each other.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, they know each other pretty well because they're brother sister.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, but Ross doesn't live in the building. He lives elsewhere. So he knew. He knew Monica. But what I'm getting at is Chandler Bing, the part that you. You audition for, apparently Chandler Bing and Joey Tribbiani. Is that his name?

[Joe Bongo]

I have.

[Scott Aukerman]

They lived across from Monica and Rachel, but did they live. Did they live together before that? Was it like, did they meet from being neighbors? Did Joey and Chandler have too loud of a party and Monica came over to complain and then they just. They really enjoyed each other's company and then, and then Joey and Chandler met. Met Ross. Oh. Like, oh, you should meet my brother. He'd be a good friend of yours and ours.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't know. Yeah, but who could we ask?

[Scott Aukerman]

You didn't do this kind of research?

[Joe Bongo]

No. For Christ's sake, no, no.

[Scott Aukerman]

What kind of research did you do?

[Joe Bongo]

I didn't do any research at all. I took a Polaroid of myself and I showed up at the casting office.

[Scott Aukerman]

Did they ask you to bring a Polaroid?

[Joe Bongo]

Apparently actors have pictures of themselves.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, well, those are called headshots. What did yours look like?

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, it was. You know what? I only had one shot at it and ended up. I don't even.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's a lot like Eminem.

[Joe Bongo]

Very little of my face without Rihanna.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, he's done a ton without her.

[Scott Aukerman]

He's done the majority of his songs without her.

[Randy Snuts]

I would say his best stuff was wither though.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Those two songs. Songs.

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, dude, they shred. Yeah, they pound.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. What's your favorite type of music, Randy?

[Randy Snuts]

Definitely Eminem is up there. All the stuff with Rihanna. D12. Anytime he freestyles his feud with Everlast.

[Scott Aukerman]

Bad meets evil.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, bad meets evil. Dude, can you imagine if Bad medieval dude. Things would get psychotic. It'd be like, better than the Suicide Squad movie.

[Scott Aukerman]

The Suicide. Oh, wow. So you like Suicide Squad?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, I Love that. That movie.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Is that your favorite film of the last few years?

[Randy Snuts]

Huh? Yeah. I have it on audio and I run to it.

[Joe Bongo]

That's a good idea.

[Scott Aukerman]

So how did you get it on audio? How did. Did you hook up your VCR to a. To a tape deck?

[Randy Snuts]

I bought a ticket, I wore a trench coat, and I. I pulled some audio equipment into the movie theater.

[Scott Aukerman]

You did a rerun in what's Happening to this. Did. I hope you didn't start dancing in the Doobie Brothers Busted you. You.

[Randy Snuts]

They wouldn't bless me, but I love what's Happening.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow.

[Joe Bongo]

Wow. Wow. The airplane landed on the ghost ship. The dwarves got involved in the war between the elves and the ghosts on the ghost ship. And that's when the wizard.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, oh, oh, I'm sorry. I keep getting snippets of this story. It's captivating.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore.

[Randy Snuts]

You gotta write this stuff down.

[Joe Bongo]

I'm just in a bongo zone. And it's hard to know what's going on when you're.

[Scott Aukerman]

Hard to know. Yeah. I wonder if you're transporting your mind to a parallel world where.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, wow. I don't know. That would be wild.

[Scott Aukerman]

Describing what you see. Like a reporter almost.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, sure.

[Scott Aukerman]

Who knows? Like Ian Anderson, you know, the doors of perception, you get opened up into other worlds when you take lsd.

[Joe Bongo]

Were we talking about the doors a little while ago?

[Scott Aukerman]

We were, yeah. Okay, good. Well, look, we need to take a break. Speaking of doors, we need to go through this door into some commercials. And when we come back, though, we're still gonna be talking to Randy. Still gonna be talking to Joe, I hope. Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

And I'm gonna find out if my podcast got picked up.

[Scott Aukerman]

It did not. And we'll come right back with more comedy Bang bang after this. What do you mean, no, we're not picking it up?

[Randy Snuts]

I mean, I got a podcast that I'll pitch to you.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, we'll do that after the break.

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[Randy Snuts]

Psoriatic arthritis symptoms can be unpredictable.

[Joe Bongo]

I had joint pain and I couldn't move like I used to.

[Scott Aukerman]

I needed relief.

[Randy Snuts]

I got Cosentyx.

[Joe Bongo]

It helped me move better.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Cosentix Secukinumab is prescribed for people 2 years of age and older with active psoriatic arthritis. Don't use if you're allergic to Cosentyx. Before starting, get checked for tuberculosis. An increased risk of infections and lowered ability to fight them may occur, like tuberculosis or other serious bacterial, fungal or viral infections. Some were fatal. Tell your doctor if you have an infection or symptoms like fevers, sweats, chills, muscle aches or cough had a vaccine or planned to. Or if inflammatory bowel disease symptoms develop or worsen, serious allergic reactions and severe eczema like skin reactions may occur. Learn more at 1-844-COSENTIX or cosentix.com.

[Scott Aukerman]

Ask your dermatologist about Cosentyx. In the mood for something crunchy, saucy and boneless? Try Jack's new crispy boneless wings from Jack in the Box starting at just $5.99. Get em with honey, garlic, Sriracha or smoke show smoky barbecue sauce in Enjoy so much more Comedy Bang Bang. We're back here with Joe Bongo, who stopped playing the bongos and has been staring into space for the past couple of minutes.

[Joe Bongo]

Is that space? That was space?

[Scott Aukerman]

No, I just mean into the space in front of us. Were you looking into space? What did you see?

[Joe Bongo]

I didn't know where I was looking.

[Scott Aukerman]

What did you see? Tell me everything.

[Joe Bongo]

I saw an angel.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really? How do you know it was an angel?

[Joe Bongo]

Because it had wings and a halo and it was carrying five babies.

[Scott Aukerman]

Five babies?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Like, are these dead babies that carrying into heaven?

[Joe Bongo]

It was pretty clear that she had stolen these babies.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, dear. Is that what happens when people die? Angels steal us?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, I think so.

[Scott Aukerman]

So if we are to not die, we just have to outrace the angels, which is hard. With your thigh eyes.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. It's not gonna be easy.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, the angels are gonna get you, my friend.

[Joe Bongo]

If somebody wants me dead, it's done.

[Randy Snuts]

The taste is gonna get you.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

And I was staring at the space between.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Oh, wow.

[Randy Snuts]

Your wicked lies. Which is a mashup I'd like to see between Dave Matthews and Eminem.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, that's the ultimate mashup.

[Randy Snuts]

Do people still do mashups?

[Scott Aukerman]

I hope so. That was such a good couple years for music, wasn't it?

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, dude. Man, Dave was crushing it every single time he got out. If it felt like every other week, he was like, here's my Live from Red Rocks album.

[Scott Aukerman]

Sure. Why is he always going to Red Rocks?

[Randy Snuts]

He frigging loves it, dude.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's like he had a residency there and he just put out every single time he was ever there.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, dude. Something. Something in the atmosphere. A bunch of crystals and shit.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, Randy Snuts is here. He's returned with us from Alhambra. Currently.

[Randy Snuts]

I'm back again. Guess who's back, back again?

[Scott Aukerman]

Randy Snuts and his friends and my.

[Randy Snuts]

Friends Joe Bongo and Scott Aukerman, who's got a podcast that will not quit.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, well, speaking of podcasts that, won't you say you have a podcast pitch that you want to pitch me? No, Joe, he sent us a pilot on audio cassette.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, I made a podcast pilot and I sent it into Scott and he hasn't decided whether he wants to get up or not.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, it's not happening.

[Randy Snuts]

And it sounds like Scott's mulling it over.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, just waiting to hear.

[Randy Snuts]

A lot of fan pressure will push him over the edge.

[Joe Bongo]

I think that's a good idea. It's very possible. Everybody write Ian Anderson a letter and tell him to write to Scott Aukerman and tell him to pick up my podcast, please.

[Scott Aukerman]

So if I start getting mail from Ian and Anderson. It's worked.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay.

[Randy Snuts]

The endless possibilities. That one, driving and.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

Like, some episodes could skew more toward driving, some could skew more toward fucking. And then, you know, you hit the sweet spot where you're talking about both or you're talking about driving and fucking the whole time. Like, yeah, like, honey, I'm trying to see the road. Stop fucking me so much.

[Scott Aukerman]

It could be a true 4 quadrant type of podcast too, if it's like, hits driving and fucking and where they meet and just, you know, right there. Where are those four states that meet at the one in the corner of each of them?

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, yeah. Massachusetts.

[Scott Aukerman]

No.

[Joe Bongo]

Washington, Rhode Island. Is that what you say?

[Randy Snuts]

Massachusetts, Rhode island, and Atlanta.

[Scott Aukerman]

I don't think so.

[Randy Snuts]

Hot Lanta, hot braves. This is the year.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, sure, Randy.

[Randy Snuts]

Chipper Jones is coming back from both sides.

[Scott Aukerman]

Not interested.

[Randy Snuts]

Chipper fucked a Hooters waitress, which is an all timer dude.

[Scott Aukerman]

Now I'm interested.

[Randy Snuts]

You can retire sexually if you a Hooters waitress.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really? So that's where you hang it up on the. From the rafters?

[Randy Snuts]

Yep.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, I can't wait to retire sexually. I've been saving.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's exhausting keeping it going. Exhausting, isn't it?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Tell me about your podcast pitch. What do you got, Randy Snuts?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, it's called I'd hit it. And it's audio of me hitting a. Like. Like, people would tweet at me objects, and then I would get that object, and then I would hit it with the bat, and we'd hear about it, and then a couple people would talk about what the sound made, what the.

[Scott Aukerman]

Sound made, or what sound it made.

[Randy Snuts]

Huh?

[Scott Aukerman]

What do you mean, what the sound made?

[Randy Snuts]

What the sound made.

[Scott Aukerman]

You keep repeating it. What do you mean by that?

[Randy Snuts]

What the sound made?

[Joe Bongo]

Sounds make things. You don't know that.

[Randy Snuts]

Look, I gotta admit, I made a mistake. Or I could keep saying it and win you over.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, you did what the sound made.

[Randy Snuts]

What the.

[Scott Aukerman]

A sound, man.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. Anyway, it's called I'd Hit It.

[Scott Aukerman]

So it's all about people bringing you or requesting things to hit. Do you have to buy the things that you hit or do people bring them to you?

[Randy Snuts]

I guess people would bring them to me. Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Because you're going to be spending a lot of money if you. If people are just like, hey, a Lamborghini. And then you have to buy a Lamborghini and hit it with a baseball bat.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, that would.

[Scott Aukerman]

All right, so that would bankrupt you.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

So it has to be stuff that people bring to you or send to you.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, I'd be like. I'd start small with, like, a wrench or a socket.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right.

[Randy Snuts]

And then to hit that stuff with a baseball.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's always with a baseball bat.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. Dude, I'd hit that with a bat. Maybe that's a better one. I'd hit that with a bat.

[Joe Bongo]

Not bad.

[Scott Aukerman]

Although I'd hit. That is actually a phrase, so it maybe would stick in the mind a little bit. Yeah. What do you think, Joe?

[Joe Bongo]

I think it's pretty good. Who are the people who you say a couple people would talk about what the sound made? Who?

[Scott Aukerman]

You.

[Joe Bongo]

Who's. Who's gonna. Because I would. I'd love to be. I'd love to volunteer.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. All right, so I'll have Joe on it.

[Scott Aukerman]

So this is sort of like the elderly people in Marina del Rey. It's a volunteer sit.

[Joe Bongo]

Your situation. It's the phone tree.

[Scott Aukerman]

Do you have to bring your own step ladder?

[Joe Bongo]

I bring my own ladder.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. It'd be a good idea to, like, toss something up in the air, and then I'd hit it from the ladder with the bat.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's not a bad idea. Yeah. Once people start getting tired of the.

[Randy Snuts]

Baseline, and then maybe we get like, a couple people that are, like, really good with audio. So Maybe we got Dr. Dre and Jimmy Ioviney or however you pronounce the defiant ones. Yeah. And they'd probably be like, I didn't like the sound because they're defiant.

[Joe Bongo]

But Joe would be like, yeah, that's great. I probably like it every time, you know what I mean? Because I don't have a high standard of sound sounds.

[Scott Aukerman]

Or what they make.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. Or what they make.

[Randy Snuts]

What sound made. What the sound made.

[Joe Bongo]

What the sound made.

[Scott Aukerman]

What the sound.

[Joe Bongo]

Should that be the title of the podcast? What's the sound made?

[Scott Aukerman]

I don't know.

[Randy Snuts]

So Scott hates it. Scott it is. Scott is a no on that podcast.

[Scott Aukerman]

How long are these episodes?

[Randy Snuts]

How long are they?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, because it seems like you hit one thing that takes about three seconds.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. It probably top out at like 45 or 60 seconds.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, every episode of the podcast.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. But we could. You could film. You could like record a bunch in a chunk.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's true. It's sort of like doing Wheel of Fortune, you know, Pat Sajak works three weeks a year, I think.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. So I'm thinking about your overhead, dude. Thank you. Hold on. He only works three weeks out of the year.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, he. He does all 52 weeks in about three weeks.

[Joe Bongo]

He still does his late night talk show, though. On cbs.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Yeah. In his house.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Wouldn't that be great? What if that had, you know, caught on as big as the Tonight show and he was just out here like, giving the. The. The counterpoint to Colbert still had a monologue every night.

[Joe Bongo]

I. That'd be great. Wouldn't it be great? I can't believe that. Yeah, he doesn't do it anymore. You say he doesn't do it.

[Scott Aukerman]

I don't think he does. Yeah, he doesn't get the opportunity to do it anymore. If you had it on, I think it was on cbs.

[Joe Bongo]

I did believe it was. Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Can you believe that? What if that had gotten popular, Letterman never would have went over. Boy, that's an alternate universe, Right now that I want to start.

[Joe Bongo]

Let's visit that alternate universe.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Play the bongos.

[Joe Bongo]

Pate. Jack has a show and it's been going on for 20 years or more. 25. 24.

[Scott Aukerman]

4, 24, 27. No, actually, 30. Almost.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow. That's a scant few details, I have to say.

[Randy Snuts]

Still trippy to step into an alternate universe still.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's always trippy.

[Joe Bongo]

Pretty wild, right? And I think there's probably elves and dwarves there.

[Scott Aukerman]

You know what? I actually if you could grab a newspaper next time you're in there and read the headlines from it, you know, it would be very inspiring from that alternate universe. Yeah, yeah. Try to slip into the bongo zone again. Here we go.

[Joe Bongo]

Okay. All right, Pat, stay. Deck has a CBS late night talk show and has had it since 1993.

[Scott Aukerman]

Rabbit newspaper.

[Joe Bongo]

It's a really big, big head. All right, here, I got a newspaper.

[Scott Aukerman]

What's it say?

[Joe Bongo]

What does it say? It says, great deals on washer dryers.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, no, look past the advertising. Go above the fold.

[Joe Bongo]

Lingerie. These lingerie ads are nice.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, no, go to the headline.

[Joe Bongo]

These girls.

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, it's mostly ads.

[Joe Bongo]

It's amazing.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's the newspaper business, isn't it? Yeah. Wow. Well, we didn't learn it anything.

[Joe Bongo]

Did we not? I was in the bongo.

[Scott Aukerman]

Next time, look up into the air and see if there's, you know, dirigibles and Isn't that weird? Anytime you go into an alternate universe, you know, they have Zeppelin, you know, up in the air.

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, yeah. Like, people are obsessed with, like, older technology, but they've made it. They've made it better. Whereas in our timeline, we're like, that sucks.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, that sucks. Who wants to. We've seen that picture on the Led Zeppelin. One album of it crashing. We don't want to get up in those. You know, it's kind of insensitive for Led Zeppelin to do that, you know.

[Joe Bongo]

What's that?

[Scott Aukerman]

They put that.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Zeppelin crashing into the ground.

[Joe Bongo]

Hindenburg survivors were very mad at the. What.

[Scott Aukerman]

What if your dad died in the Hindenburg and you're like, I love Led Zeppelin. I cannot wait for their album to come out. It comes out and look at it. I mean, I guess, you know, the fact that they're called Led Zeppelin, that would give you.

[Joe Bongo]

That would have been a tip off.

[Scott Aukerman]

A tip off. Why would you even like that band?

[Joe Bongo]

That thing's not going anywhere.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, it's already pissing you off. Because even the people, like the. The victim. Like, the victims, like children and stuff, their family members, they'd be like Led Zeppelin. Like, it was a smooth ride.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

It was filled with helium flames, but it was a smooth ride.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

It was not like a heavy lead ride. You know, it went down slow.

[Scott Aukerman]

I mean, it's kind of. It's really intense. It's kind of like calling your band 911 or something like that. You know, like the twin. The former twin Towers or something, you know, and then putting a picture of it.

[Randy Snuts]

Geez.

[Scott Aukerman]

I mean, it's terrible. We shouldn't. Why? Why, why does he want to.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, how many years did they wait from Hindenburg? When did the Hindenburg crowd.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, so I think it was in the 30s, and then the 70s. It's 40 years.

[Joe Bongo]

So they waited 40 years. So how long do you have to wait?

[Scott Aukerman]

2041.

[Joe Bongo]

2041.

[Scott Aukerman]

Fair game.

[Joe Bongo]

Fair game. Have at it.

[Randy Snuts]

This is one, like, on the ride home. I'm going to be laughing my ass off about this, but I had to pay respect in the moment.

[Scott Aukerman]

I appreciate that. That's nice of you, Randy. I, I, I shouldn't, I shouldn't even probably be talking about this. It's not 2041 yet.

[Randy Snuts]

All right, look, if you edit this out, you're a fucking coward.

[Scott Aukerman]

I will not edit it out.

[Randy Snuts]

You won't?

[Scott Aukerman]

No, I'm not a coward. As established before, I told him right to his face that I'm not picking up his pilot.

[Joe Bongo]

What?

[Scott Aukerman]

Do you not remember? No.

[Joe Bongo]

What do you mean you're not picking up my pilot?

[Randy Snuts]

John, you're on the fence. You're on the fence, dude. No fan pressure is going to push you over.

[Joe Bongo]

Fan pressure?

[Randy Snuts]

Joe, I got full confidence that your podcast is going to get made.

[Scott Aukerman]

I don't know.

[Randy Snuts]

People want to hear about these things.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, they do. They do. People like driving and fucking.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

You said you had a second idea for yours, though, Randy.

[Randy Snuts]

For my podcast?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Because just in case, can I hit it where we figure out what the sound made?

[Randy Snuts]

Let me hit it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, let me hit it.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, I'd hit that.

[Randy Snuts]

I'd hit that.

[Joe Bongo]

Started out as I would hit it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, I did.

[Randy Snuts]

Well, now I got three ideas out there and you're saying maybe to all of them.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, different idea. I'm not talking about the title, dude.

[Randy Snuts]

What are you drinking? Coward juice. Say yes to one of these. Green light it. You're yellow lighting everything I do.

[Scott Aukerman]

You can't same me me and call me a coward.

[Randy Snuts]

That's my next idea. Shaming Scott. I follow you around and I go tsk, tsk to all the things I don't like in your life.

[Scott Aukerman]

Like, what would that be?

[Randy Snuts]

I don't know. Like, what'd you have for breakfast today.

[Scott Aukerman]

Dude, I had an egg thing and some egg thing.

[Randy Snuts]

Egg thing.

[Scott Aukerman]

I forget what you call it.

[Joe Bongo]

Did you have Kevin Bacon over?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, he came by.

[Joe Bongo]

He did?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. I was like, look, the only. If you're friends with Kevin Bacon and you invite him over for like around 9am yeah. He has to know. Oh, okay. I'm supposed to bring the bacon.

[Joe Bongo]

Absolutely.

[Randy Snuts]

I bet a couple of years ago he was flipping out when people were coming out with bacon beers and like.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, yeah. Like, now I'm on the clock all day.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

Helping everyone forget about Hollow Man. Has he ever. You should have him. That's my next pitch.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay.

[Randy Snuts]

Shaming Kevin Bacon about Hollow Man.

[Scott Aukerman]

Shaman Bacon.

[Randy Snuts]

Shame. Yeah, actually.

[Scott Aukerman]

Or Shaman Bacon.

[Randy Snuts]

Shaman Bacon. I don't get. What the angle on that podcast.

[Scott Aukerman]

I don't know. Maybe you get some sort of, like, Indian tribal chief and Kevin Bacon. They have a conversation.

[Randy Snuts]

Dude, I'm wearing cargo shorts. I'm as wide as they come. I can't, like, do, like, podcasts about other cultures. I got shredded. Rip my mentions.

[Scott Aukerman]

I. I noticed your cargo shorts, by the way.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Take a look at his thigh highs. You ever think about putting on some of those?

[Randy Snuts]

Dang, if I. If I weren't looking at the top half, those thigh highs would be mighty inviting.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, yeah. Yeah, dude, thank you.

[Randy Snuts]

They look scoring.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, thank you very much. Well, they're really just protective because I'm tired of getting hit in the legs.

[Scott Aukerman]

They're hot pink. Almost like the St. Vincent album.

[Joe Bongo]

Well, and that wasn't a choice because, you know, it was a long story, but I'm at the emergency room and they're like, I'll cut you a deal on these hot pink ones.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay.

[Joe Bongo]

And I said okay, because insurance will not cover preventive casts on your legs. They won't do it.

[Scott Aukerman]

So how much did those run you?

[Joe Bongo]

This was like $8,000.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, my God.

[Joe Bongo]

For these hot pink.

[Scott Aukerman]

I hate to be insensitive when I say run you, by the way, because I know you can't run.

[Joe Bongo]

I can't really run running these. Yeah, that's true.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Do you have crutch? I haven't noticed how you. I came in and you were already sitting down.

[Joe Bongo]

I couldn't afford the crutches. That was going to be another $3,000.

[Scott Aukerman]

I mean, you're already pot committed, though, with the 8,000.

[Joe Bongo]

I know, but I could. You couldn't do it because I was like, I don't need those. I'll just, you know, lift myself up to my feet and then topple over and then get back up.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

But even that.

[Joe Bongo]

It's turned out to be hard. It's mostly just even that. Yeah. I've just been dragging myself around.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, yeah, that's. That's the opposite of Tom Petty.

[Joe Bongo]

Stop dragging my heart.

[Randy Snuts]

No, he wouldn't back down, and he wanted his heart to stop being dragged around, right?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

We can go deep on that.

[Scott Aukerman]

How did. How did you feel, Randy? Are you a Tom petty fan?

[Randy Snuts]

Absolutely. 100%. He's my number one.

[Scott Aukerman]

That was a tough year last year.

[Randy Snuts]

I was crushed.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, I bet.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, dude. I was on the floor. It took a while. It took a while to get up from that one.

[Joe Bongo]

I feel like he will be back, though.

[Scott Aukerman]

You think so?

[Joe Bongo]

I do.

[Scott Aukerman]

You think an angel's going.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't know the mechanics of how it's going to happen, but I do feel that Tom Petty will return.

[Scott Aukerman]

So he didn't back down to the angel, which was his ultimate mistake, because, you know, if he just would have escaped.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah. We have not seen the last of Tom Petty. That guy. He'll be back.

[Scott Aukerman]

He'll be back. He'll be back. Trust me.

[Randy Snuts]

He's running down a dream right now.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

I wouldn't be surprised if just next year, suddenly, like, surprise album release, and we're like, what?

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

And it's like, oh, no, no.

[Joe Bongo]

He's back and he doesn't talk about it. It's not a big thing.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's not a big thing.

[Joe Bongo]

He's just like, I'm here. That whole thing from last year didn't work out. It just didn't go how I thought. And I'm back, and it's fine.

[Scott Aukerman]

I'm back. Let's just forget about. And he does that song Back Again. That's the.

[Randy Snuts]

That was back.

[Scott Aukerman]

I was so upset. He never covered that song, the Eminem song.

[Randy Snuts]

I bet he covered a ton of stuff in studio because they were a prolific band.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

Just like, you know, someone would be like, play this, and they'd play it. So there's probably going to be a lot of, like, pop culture cover.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

Posthumous albums that are coming out.

[Scott Aukerman]

You think he'll do the entire rap, too?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

And then him. And who's that guy from the Heartbreakers? Mike.

[Randy Snuts]

Mike Campbell.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, Mike Campbell, like, you know, redoing the video where, like, Dre and Eminem were Batman and Robin.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

That would be amazing.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, for sure.

[Scott Aukerman]

If they just secretly filmed that. And Tom Petty was like, put this out after I die.

[Randy Snuts]

We're getting. Hey, I'm loving it, but we're getting insanely disrespectful.

[Scott Aukerman]

But that's. That's you, though, Randy.

[Randy Snuts]

Dude, that's.

[Joe Bongo]

What, are we gonna wait 40 years before we can talk about this?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, come on. It's like 40 years after his first album.

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Joe Bongo]

When he's eligible for the Rock and Roll hall of Fame and then another 50.

[Scott Aukerman]

So it's already been.

[Randy Snuts]

It's been 42 years since his first album, so.

[Scott Aukerman]

So there we go. He's a fair game at this point.

[Randy Snuts]

Classic self titled album.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers.

[Randy Snuts]

The rifts that took over America.

[Scott Aukerman]

Play the bongos. Play the bongos.

[Randy Snuts]

He's gonna cover the friends.

[Scott Aukerman]

Franz, I want to hear more of this story.

[Joe Bongo]

And the war between the elves and the ghosts was joined by the dwarves and the wizard. Look up into sky and there were blimps made of lead.

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, there's. Look at the ground. There's a newspaper.

[Joe Bongo]

Okay, let me look. There's a war raging on a ghost ship in the harbor. And this wizard is destroying everything in sight. But I'm going to take a quick look at this newspaper and I thought.

[Scott Aukerman]

That was the headline.

[Joe Bongo]

Let's see here. Buick LeSabre. They're bringing that back. Wow. Good price on a car, though. Not bad.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, so we know that in this alternate universe, the LeSabre was the most popular car.

[Randy Snuts]

So they have like rudimentary flying machines and the sabers. Hey, don't you love it when people are like, hey, what kind of car is that? Is that a nice, fancy, expensive car? And someone's like, no, it's a Buick. And they're like, off. Buicks suck. That can't be a Buick. That's like. Buick's like.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's Buick's their current ad campaign. We know we suck and we know we currently suck and we apologize.

[Randy Snuts]

Fuck Buick. I will never let Buick advertise for anything. I do.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

Why?

[Scott Aukerman]

What do you do? We've never established that you worked at that ampm.

[Randy Snuts]

I post up with my boys and I create epic, legendary stuff.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right, right. I forgot about that.

[Randy Snuts]

I do.

[Scott Aukerman]

Like, what have you created?

[Randy Snuts]

We set a bunch of my friend's old clothes on fire. He gained a ton of weight and so we had to say buy to a lot of his smaller clothes.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, that's tough.

[Scott Aukerman]

So it wasn't. It wasn't the opposite. It wasn't the Dom DeLuise.

[Randy Snuts]

Oh, no.

[Joe Bongo]

He had no aspiration to get back to a size where he could fit back into.

[Scott Aukerman]

He's just like, it, burn it. I'm happy where I am.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

He was too thin to be honest.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

He went from a small to a medium. You guys are making it seem like.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, yeah. I don't mean to body shame him. Whatever size he is.

[Randy Snuts]

He had a lot of like, this guy's behind the Times. Like, he. He still had frosted tips. So we shaved his head and burned his clothes.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow. Oh, my God. Wait, is this. This isn't that Diners Drive Ins and Dives Guy. Is it?

[Joe Bongo]

Ooh.

[Randy Snuts]

Guy Fieri.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow. You pronounced it so perfectly.

[Joe Bongo]

That's beautiful. A true Italian pronunciation.

[Randy Snuts]

One of my favorite shows. Dude.

[Joe Bongo]

Diner. Diner. What did. Diner. Driving and fucking. Diner.

[Scott Aukerman]

Driving, Drivings.

[Joe Bongo]

Diners. Driving and fuckings.

[Randy Snuts]

How.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, man.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, guys, I could talk to you all day. I just. I enjoy you guys.

[Joe Bongo]

Okay.

[Scott Aukerman]

You have nothing else to do today?

[Joe Bongo]

I don't think I do. No. I mean, I'm supposed to be teaching now, actually.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really? Yeah. Also, you're supposed to be in that parking lot.

[Joe Bongo]

Yeah, but the parking lot takes care of itself.

[Scott Aukerman]

Does it?

[Randy Snuts]

Wait, Scott, are you saying. Let's take this offline. Let's kick it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Let's slide into the dm.

[Randy Snuts]

Let's lick it and kick it. All right.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, but we do have to wrap it up.

[Randy Snuts]

Hey, here's a doll of you. Show me on this doll where you want me to lick it, then kick.

[Scott Aukerman]

Nowhere.

[Joe Bongo]

That's a really weird doll. Did you have that made?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Why do you have a doll.

[Joe Bongo]

Why do you have a doll of Sky?

[Randy Snuts]

I don't know. Everyone's got their hobbies.

[Scott Aukerman]

Is that a hobby of yours? Making dolls of people you know, or just of me?

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

Wow.

[Randy Snuts]

Of you. Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Of me.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay. How many do you own?

[Randy Snuts]

I don't know. Six or seven. They take a while.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Joe Bongo]

It's not very flattering, if I may say.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. I mean, you've. It's almost like getting a caricature down by the bead. You've enhanced my most grotesque attributes. My nose is enormous. But thank you very much. I appreciate the interest.

[Joe Bongo]

I get into a lot of fights with those caricature guys out there.

[Scott Aukerman]

You do?

[Joe Bongo]

On the pier.

[Scott Aukerman]

On the pier.

[Joe Bongo]

You know, everybody knows there's one awesome spot on the pier where you get a little sun, but not too much. If the caricature giant guy gets there before me, I gotta drive him away.

[Scott Aukerman]

You get a little sun, but not too much.

[Joe Bongo]

You don't want too. Too much, son.

[Scott Aukerman]

Slightly shaded. I'm sorry. We don't have time to get into all that, but another time. Please come back. Sure. But we do have to do one last feature on the show, and that's a little something called plug.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, boy.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow. That was Plug Me Baby by Maxwell James. Joe Bongo remix.

[Joe Bongo]

Beautiful.

[Scott Aukerman]

Ah, beautiful stuff. Now, if you had someone like Maxwell James in The band. What would you do?

[Joe Bongo]

Play the bongos? What do you mean? What was the question? I don't understand the question. What would I do?

[Scott Aukerman]

Flunk him? I don't know.

[Joe Bongo]

Oh, I see what you're talking about. If he was a student at Marines Del Rey High School and he was in my band, yeah. I don't think I would let that guy go.

[Scott Aukerman]

Forget about it. He's too talented. Yeah, yeah. Amazing stuff. Thank you, Maxwell James. All right, what are we plugging? What do we got out there? Like, obviously you have a show.

[Joe Bongo]

Yes, my new podcast is starting up as a regular podcast on Earwolf. Definitely not immediately. Also, Rose Bush read my band. We're playing the Battle of the Bands out in Dana Point. We're gonna be out on a barge. And that's how they do it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Is it. Is it. When you say Battle of the Bands, what happens during this? Do you just play songs or is there something else that happens in this battle?

[Joe Bongo]

Well, no. I mean, yeah, everybody plays songs. You get to do three songs each. But then the real really goes down in the parking lot of the Ocean Experience Aquarium thing they have over there. That's when the bands really fucking settle.

[Scott Aukerman]

Who's best, right? Bring your own bat. Yeah. Maybe you could bring a ringer over here. The star of. I'd Hit it. Yeah, he has his own baseball bat.

[Joe Bongo]

That'd be great. I usually bring a broken bottle, but a bat would be good, too.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, I'll hit the ground with it.

[Joe Bongo]

Sweet. That's great.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay, so great. Go check that out. And Randy, what are you plugging?

[Randy Snuts]

I mean, I'll plug a hangout, kind of impromptu kegger that me and my friend Kevin are doing. Ok. And we're going to be listening to One Hot Minute out of the stereo in my car.

[Scott Aukerman]

Now, when you say that, you mean the Red Hot Chili Peppers album? Yeah, the one that Dave Navarro did.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah, that's right.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

Kicks ass. It's pretty thin after My Friends, but otherwise it's a pretty good album. Actually, if you don't listen to My Friends, it really lowers expectations and you can enjoy it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, okay. Because My Friends is so good.

[Randy Snuts]

Yeah. Yeah. It's way better than the rest of the album.

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay.

[Joe Bongo]

Interesting walkabout. That's a good song.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Randy Snuts]

Pretty good song.

[Joe Bongo]

Aeroplane.

[Randy Snuts]

I don't know.

[Joe Bongo]

I'm a little pee. That's a good one.

[Scott Aukerman]

A lot of true music lovers in this room.

[Randy Snuts]

Sounds like you guys will either be there or you don't need to be there.

[Scott Aukerman]

I think I don't need it. I can pass in any situation. That's where I like to be.

[Randy Snuts]

I'll plug a show called Shrink, which is streaming for free on NBC on all its platforms, the website and the app.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, get in there, get in there. Hey, I want to plug the PCast Blast. Coming up very soon, in two weeks. PCast Blast, the live podcast performance event of a generation, if not a lifetime, over at the Ace Hotel, the theater at the Ace Hotel here in Los Angeles. December 15th, Saturday all day. We have incredible shows. We have teachers lounge doughboys off book throwing Shade, the Andy Daily podcast project, which you will be interested in, and a live comedy Bang Bang with myself and Paul F. Tompkins, Lauren Lapkis and more special guests. Head over to the My Twitter has a link for to buy tickets right at the top in the pin tweet. And head over to the theater at the Ace Hotel website as well. They'll help you out. You're not going to want to miss that. Tickets are moving fast. PCAS blast 2018 December 15th okay, let's close up the old plug bag. Oh, let's turn it up. Ah, man. If only that had started at full volume, we could have gotten the remix and played it till the end of the year. But unfortunately, engineer Cody Sam fucked it up, so we will not be playing the Joe Bongo remix. I apologize to you, Joe.

[Joe Bongo]

I don't even know what's happening.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, okay. What are you seeing right now?

[Joe Bongo]

I'm just looking straight into the void. And Pat is there and he is beckoning me in with the baby.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, don't.

[Joe Bongo]

And the wizard is there and I can't. I go. I gotta go.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, don't go in there. Okay, we'll see you next time. Bye.

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[Randy Snuts]

Psoriatic arthritis symptoms can be unpredictable.

[Joe Bongo]

I had joint pain and I couldn't move like I used to.

[Scott Aukerman]

I needed relief.

[Randy Snuts]

I got Cosentyx.

[Joe Bongo]

It helped me move better.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

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[Scott Aukerman]

Ask your rheumatologist about Cosentyx. I know I'm not alone when I.

[Randy Snuts]

Say adulting can be overwhelming.

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[Randy Snuts]

At home and on the go.

[Whole Foods Market Announcer]

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