Comedy Bang Bang: Dudes Rock! (Feb 2, 2026)

Host: Scott Aukerman
Guests/Characters: Rupert McDougall (May Darmon), Duke Nukem (Matt Apodaca), Chris Thomas (Angela Giarratana)
Theme: A bro-heavy “CBB Roundtable” explores “the issues of the day”—but quickly devolves into comic camaraderie, body count braggadocio, relationship woes, and surreal manly tangents.

Episode Overview

Scott Aukerman stages a “CBB Roundtable” after failing to book a proper celebrity, instead creating a loose, anything-goes panel of repeat and first-time characters. Today’s all-dude panel—time-displaced Scotsman Rupert McDougall, hyper-masculine game hero Duke Nukem, and neighbor-in-relationship-peril Chris Thomas—finds comfort in the safe space of masculine nonsense, riffing on everything from ancient love to relationship cycles to what counts as “man gogurt.” The result is as much therapy session for hapless bros as a satire of “man talk” culture.

Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introduction & Premise: The CBB Roundtable

• Scott opens with the promise of tackling today's "crazy" issues in a “roundtable” format; panelists may try to change each other’s minds or just overshare.
• Reveals the real reason for this format: “mainly we couldn’t book anyone” ([02:33]).

2. Guest Introductions & Backstories

a. Rupert McDougall (May Darmon)

• A Scotsman from the year 1772, accidentally sent to modern LA by a portal activated mid-wedding night, forever a frustrated virgin.
• Has failed to adapt to acting auditions (“They’re telling me the couch is a person. I don’t think so, Scott.” [12:12]) and awaits a commercial callback.
• Stays with "guys in the Valley" (the cast of The Valley), struggles with modernity, and is obsessed with returning to Deirdre, his never-consummated bride.
• Notable: Is still not over Scott taking his knife.
• Quote: “People who play pretend in 1772 are witches…” ([12:24])

b. Duke Nukem (Matt Apodaca)

• Video game action anti-hero, parodying hyper-masculinity; boasts of high “body count” (sexual partners and enemies alike)
• Has been cloned (“I’ve kicked my own ass…” [13:14]), is running for governor (“If you try to step to anybody in California, I’ll rip your head off!” [18:17]), and claims to be “Pan”—he’ll have sex with anything.
• Panel catchphrase generator: “Hail to the king, baby!” and “Damn, I’m looking good.”
• Quote: “The only offer I accept is kicking your ass.” ([33:38])
• Quote: “I don’t drink any water. I only drink Monster Energy drinks, brother.” ([36:11])

c. Chris Thomas (Angela Giarratana)

• A hapless, nervous local, newly moved in with girlfriend Quinn, whose period-induced mood swings have left him literally fleeing the house.
• Seeks advice and compassion from the “dudes,” worries his girlfriend is possessed, and admits to feeling overwhelmed by cohabitation.
• Quote: “I don’t know what monster took her. Took my sweet baby girl…” ([22:06])
• Eats cereal out of vases (since Quinn is a florist) and is unsure how to handle emotional cycles.
• Quote: “I love her so much. She would have never done this two days ago. And what’s weird is she did this a month ago.” ([22:19])

Memorable/Notable Moments & Quotes

• Manly Safe Space:

  • “It’s so awesome to be in a room to speak freely with a bunch of men.” ([25:47])
  • “This is a safe space.” ([25:51])

• Body Count Braggadocio:

  • Scott asks for sexual “body count”—a running CBB parody of bro-metrics:
    • Chris: “Body count: two, by the way.”
    • Duke: “10,000.”
    • Rupert: “Still at zero.” ([23:07], [17:44], [06:29])

• Duke on Relationships/Politics:

  • “I’m running for the Duke Nukem Party, baby, because I don’t submit to any one party.” ([18:45])
  • “If you don’t vote for me, you better get well acquainted with my boot, motherfucker.” ([33:48])

• Rupert’s Portal Problem:

  • His inability to consummate his marriage due to bathroom-related portal mishaps (“There’s a ton of portals. There’s multiple.” [09:52])
  • Legree Pilates machine as accidental time machine ([10:10])

• Debate: What is “GoGurt”?

  • Arguments about what counts as "gogurt": “Is aioli gogurt? Is caramel gogurt? Concrete is man gogurt.” ([25:12], [25:40])
  • “My piss is thick like gogurt.” ([36:03])
  • “Period blood is gogurt.” ([69:17])

• Masculine Camaraderie/Satire:

  • Repeated celebrations of “dudes rock” and the freedom and stupidity of an all-male panel
  • Chris, emotionally: “This group here, I don’t know what it’s been...there’s something really special here.” ([77:54])

Key Segments & Timestamps

• CBB Roundtable Announcement / Premise: [02:33 – 03:59]
• Panel Introductions & Backstories: [03:59 – 21:00]
  • Rupert’s time-travel story, virginity hangup
  • Duke Nukem’s clone/combat philosophy
  • Chris Thomas’ domestic woes
• Safe Dudes’ Space/Body Count Bits: [23:00 – 25:00]
• Defining “GoGurt” & Tangents: [25:09 – 26:00]
• Getting to “Issues of the Day”: [26:12, 39:10, 40:14]
• Pet Preference Roundtable (Horse, Big Monkey, Lizard): [40:14 – 44:01]
• Exploring Outer Space v. Bottom of the Ocean: [63:28 – 76:35]
  • Sidebars on swimming, movie recommendations, and living with women
  • Screensaver hijinks—visual metaphor for the panel’s shifting focus ([69:29 – 75:06])
• Speed Round: “What Would You Buy with a Million Dollars?” [79:04 – 80:51]
  • Duke would buy another clone; Rupert, expensive fragrances; Chris, a cryochamber to “freeze my girlfriend...when she’s in a good mood” ([79:58])
• Plugs: [82:56 – 87:09]
  • Rupert: UCB’s Herald Night
  • Duke: Get Played Podcast, Netflix’s Strip Law
  • Chris: Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists podcast

Character Interplay & Running Gags

• Scott's Running Annoyance:

  • With Rupert’s loquacious, meandering backstories
  • With Duke’s cocky, cyclical catchphrases
  • With Chris’s anxious interruptions and requests for refuge

• Weapon Confiscation:

  • Scott must keep track of Rupert’s knife and Duke’s arsenal in the studio: “I’ll give them back at the end of the show.” ([15:11])

• Bro Wisdom and Inept Relationship Advice:

  • The panel’s mixture of mock-support, bad advice, and feigned sympathy for Chris’s period panic and relationship confusion
  • “As bros, we need to level with each other…” ([54:53])

Notable Quotes (with Timestamps)

• Rupert: “People who play pretend in 1772 are witches, so…” ([12:24])
• Duke: “I’ve been cloned and I kicked my own ass. I take my own name.” ([13:41])
• Scott (to Chris): “Sometimes as bros, we need to level with each other and say bro…” ([54:53])
• Chris (on male safe spaces): “It’s so awesome to be in a room to speak freely with a bunch of men.” ([25:47])
• Duke (on diet): “I don’t drink any water. I only drink Monster Energy drinks, brother.” ([36:11])
• Chris (on partner): “My girlfriend’s on her period... I love her so much. She would have never done this two days ago. And what’s weird is she did this a month ago.” ([22:19])

Tone & Style

Irreverent, rambly, self-aware, and playful, the episode lampoons bro culture, relationship cliches, and pop masculinity, taking refuge in dumb, competitive digressions. The panel is quick to bond over shared idiocy, hostile or anxious posturing, and inside jokes.

Conclusion

The “Dudes Rock!” roundtable finds accidental depth through comic shallowness, offering a snapshot of what happens when men are left alone to “solve” the world’s problems: pet debates, snack metaphysics, relationship panic, and a lot of emotionally constipated, literal, and metaphorical machismo. The panel never gets to real issues but ends with plugs and affectionate chaos—Chris runs off, reinvigorated by an NSFW text from Quinn, and Scott makes it clear the open-door policy is strictly for the show.

Summary Table of Main Segments

| Time | Segment | Highlights | |----------|--------------------------|------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:33 | CBB Roundtable intro | Scott sets the scene (“couldn’t book anyone”); theme of finding common ground | | 03:59 | Panel intros | Rupert’s portal woes; Duke’s bravado/history; Chris’s relationship crisis | | 23:00 | Bro/Body Count bits | Sexual history comparisons; safe space for bro sharing | | 25:09 | GoGurt debate | What counts as “man gogurt”; food/masculinity absurdity | | 40:14 | Pet preferences | Rupert (horse), Duke (giant monkey), Chris (lizard/family wants) | | 63:28 | Space v. Ocean | Everyone picks “ocean” for manly reasons; fear and camaraderie | | 79:04 | Speed round | What you’d buy with a million dollars—clones, fragrances, cryochamber | | 82:56 | Plugs | Guests recommend live shows, podcasts, new animated series |

For New Listeners

This episode is less about tackling news “issues” and more a comic riff on the idea of the men’s panel: expect time travel snafus, over-the-top machismo, and a parade of “dudes rock” nonsense. Engaging, quotable, and a great showcase of comedy character work.

Best quote for the vibe:
“It truly is. This is a safe space. Of course, we’re going to be talking about the issues of the day. Are you guys prepared for this?” - Scott Aukerman ([25:51])