Fatiha El-Ghorri: A Match Made Inshallah

Summary

Podcast Summary: Comedy of the Week — "Fatiha El-Ghorri: A Match Made Inshallah" (BBC Radio 4, Feb 16, 2026)

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Episode Overview

In this lively and candid episode, comedian Fatiha El-Ghorri invites listeners on a unique journey: part stand-up show, part reality dating experiment. At 44, twice-divorced, and hilariously honest about the Muslim dating scene, Fatiha records a real first date—with permission—hoping to unravel the modern complexities of love and, maybe, find "a match made inshallah" (God willing). Listeners get to eavesdrop, judge, and laugh along as she recaps the entire adventure for her "besties"—the audience.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Fatiha’s Take on Modern Dating (00:02–02:40)

• Dating is described as a "minefield," especially for someone with "actual standards," a Muslim background, and experience with divorce.
• Fatiha rejects dating apps ("This is 2026, people"), choosing instead to find love via the BBC and record the process for radio.
• Explains in characteristic humor: “With his consent, obviously. This ain’t a kink show. Relax.”

Audio Dating Profiles (02:41–04:18)

• Fatiha’s Profile: 44, 5’8, Muslim, British-North African-Arab, stand-up comedian seeking an age-appropriate Muslim man who's "respectful, honest, thoughtful, kind."
• Tariq’s Profile: 44, 5’7, Sunni Muslim, British-Lebanese, working in the food and drinks industry, seeking someone “decent, kind, gets what I do, and someone who makes me laugh.”
  • Fatiha’s reaction: “Ooh, good voice… this is a positive start, do you know what I mean?” (02:56)

First Impressions and Cultural Observations (04:19–05:09)

• Fatiha gives comic commentary on Tariq’s appearance—blue eyes, fair complexion, “could pass for a white dude”—leading to jokes about what people expect Middle Eastern men to look like.
• Playful takes on how Arab names are mispronounced in Britain (“You don’t use your throats when you’re talking, so you end up butchering Arab names.”)

The Date: Food, Background, and Banter (05:10–06:47)

• Tariq shares he “just wants to feed people,” which Fatiha finds endearing as she loves eating.
• Fatiha is delighted that Tariq asks questions: “Oh, my God. A man that asks questions. Excuse me. Excuse me. I'm having aneurysm.” (05:22)
  • She contrasts this with past dates, humorously recounting men’s lack of curiosity and sharing a story about faking Arabic as a test.

Shared Experiences and Identity (06:48–08:43)

• Tariq recounts facing both racism and reverse racism due to his ambiguous looks and name at airports.
• Exploration of cultural backgrounds: Tariq discusses Lebanese roots, a Catholic-raised mother, and a Sunni Muslim father, reflecting mixed heritage and open-mindedness.

Types, Attraction, and Family (07:34–09:05)

• When asked about his "type," Tariq answers “woman,” which Fatiha roasts mercilessly:
  • “I hate men that answer like that. Honestly, if the producer wasn't there, I would have knocked him out. I Swear to you…”
• Fatiha delves into the realities of online dating stereotypes and expectations about body type and food.

Bad Date Stories (09:06–11:47)

• Tariq recounts tales including being invited to a Scientology recruitment date and getting locked naked on a balcony.
• The biggest shock: dating someone who turned out to be an escort seeking £10k a month.
• Fatiha shares her own “worst date”: a man who offered to share his untouched lunch from that day after a coffee date. “You know, And I picked up the phone, I called 999, okay. And I said, please, can you attend because there's been a murder.”

Hope for Love (11:47–12:04)

• Tariq reveals he remains optimistic about love despite setbacks:
  • “You can have a shitter day and you look at a child and the wonderment that they have… and you’re like, there is still magic in the world.” (11:47)

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On dating frustrations:
  “Dating is the worst, okay? If they're not ghosting you, they're still in love with their ex. Or they have a whole ass wife sitting at home watching EastEnders. What? What? You know, it's true.” — Fatiha (00:56)

• On being asked questions on dates:
  “Oh, my God. A man that asks questions. Excuse me. Excuse me. I’m having aneurysm.” — Fatiha (05:22)

• On awkward online dating ‘types’:
  “What’s your type? They go, I don’t have a type. It’s all vibes. Yeah. Why are you lying?” — Fatiha (07:39)

• On date disasters:
  “I once got locked down naked in a balcony.” — Tariq (10:13)
  “And then it turns out she was a bloody escort. Yeah, exact. And she asked him for 10k a month. I know.” — Fatiha (10:26)

• On still being hopeful:
  “It is everywhere. You just have to go from. So, yeah, I am very hopeful.” — Tariq (11:55)

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The Second Date Reveal & Finale (12:04–13:15)

• Fatiha shocks the audience by announcing, "Well, it turns out Tariq is here tonight. This is actually our second day..."
• However, in a comic twist, Tariq confesses:
  “The reason why we didn’t go on a second date is because I have something to confess... I have a wife waiting at home.” (13:02)
• Fatiha quips:
  “No guys I'm sorry, I'm still single and if you want to date me, get in touch. But please be aware my producer will be the third wheel and it will be for a Radio 4 show and I’ll write loads of jokes about you.” (13:15)

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Timestamps for Noteworthy Segments

• 00:02 — Fatiha’s opening and dating woes.
• 02:42 — Audio profiles: Fatiha and Tariq.
• 04:23 — First impressions at the pizza place.
• 06:47 — Discussion of heritage and cultural identity.
• 07:39 — "What's your type" discussion.
• 09:39 — Bad dating stories.
• 11:47 — Discussion on hope and optimism in love.
• 12:51 — The second date reveal and comic twist.
• 13:15 — Fatiha’s sign-off and open call for listeners.

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Overall Tone

Brilliantly irreverent, self-deprecating, and packed with cultural observations, “A Match Made Inshallah” offers both belly laughs and honest insights into navigating love as a British Muslim woman. Fatiha El-Ghorri’s wit and warmth ensure the episode is as inviting as gossiping with a close friend—one who tells it all, ugly dates and all, for the sake of comedy and connection.

Transcript

[A]

Hi, I'm Fatih Al Gorey and this is a match made Inshah. It's part stand up show, part actual date. Sort of a fly on the wall then gossip with your friends about it afterwards kind of thing. Do you know what I mean? And you, dear listener, are my bestie. So I'm going to tell you how this date was and I'm going to tell you what Dayton is. Dating is a minefield, man. And it's even more of a minefield when you're me, a 44 year old, twice divorced Muslim woman with actual standards. So yeah, I'm looking for love, but I ain't doing it on the apps no more. This is 2026, people. Come on. I'm changing things up. I'm doing it on radio. Yep, that's right. I'm going to find my man through the bloody BBC and I'm going to go on a date with him and I'm going to record it for you all to listen to. With his consent, obviously. This ain't a kink show. Relax. And then I'm gonna tell you all about it in my natural habitat in front of a stand up comedy crowd. Oi, oi. Dating is the worst, okay? If they're not ghosting you, they're still in love with their ex. Or they're looking for something casual even though it says on their bloody profile that they're looking for something serious, okay? Or they have a whole ass wife sitting at home watching EastEnders. What? What? You know, it's true. So when I was going into this state, I was just going in with the mindset of like, this going to be another one to add to all the hell knows, you know, And I'm on the verge of like bloody joining a convent. Maybe not a convent, you know, because they probably wouldn't let me in. By the way, I got hearts on my hijab. See the things I do for you, Prince? Together we're going to try and work out all this dating and love nonsense, okay? And maybe, just maybe, we will have a match made. Insha'. Allah. Insha' Allah means God willing. Just let you know there all those people going for their phones and dialing 999. So let's do this properly. Here is my audio dating profile. My name's Fatiha, I'm a stand up comedian, I'm 44, I'm 5 foot 8 and I'm a Muslim, British, North African Arab. I'd like to meet a guy that's age appropriate, a Muslim man who is a gentleman. A man who is respectful, honest, thoughtful, kind, and I want to share his life, his dreams, his struggles, and I want to be able to share mine with him too. Cor blimey. I have more chance of winning the bloody lottery than getting what I want. But let's hear from my date. Here's his audio dating profile.

[B]

My name is Tariq, I'm 44 years old, I'm 5 foot 7, Sunni Muslim, British, Lebanese, and I work in the food and drinks industry. I would like to meet a woman, is decent, kind, gets what I do, and someone who makes me laugh.

[A]

Ooh, good voice. Like, I'm decent, I'm kind, I'm a comedian. Oh, besties. This is a positive start, do you know what I mean? So listen, as I speak to you now, today is the day of the date. Like, I'm actually at the station, like right now, about to go and meet him and we've decided to do that classic first date thing of going to a pizza place. A pizza place that I'm expressly unable to talk about on the BBC. Do you know what I'm saying? Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Right, I'm outside the restaurant now and I'm about to go in, but first I'm sneaking a look through the window and there is only one guy in there on his own. Loser. I'm joking. That's him. That must be Tariq. Not gonna lie, he looks like a white guy. Oh, man, I need to talk about this on stage. So listen, I've actually gone on a date and recorded it. Ooh, King, King. So his name is Tariq. Okay, that's how you say it in Arabic, Tariq. Not Tariq. Your white Tariq. Are you cat Slater from EastEnders? Bruv, it's Tariq yous don't use your throats when you're talking, so you end up butchering Arab names. Tariq looked quite different to what you might expect of like. Like a Middle Eastern man. You got blue eyes in here.

[B]

I do

[A]

guys, you can't get nothing past me. He had a fair complexion, blue eyes. Hello, alien. And you could pass for a white dude. Basically.

[B]

When I was growing up, like my maternal side of the family, they were all in America and my dad's side, they were kind of all over Saudi Arabia, Lebanon.

[A]

Is that your heritage? Lebanese?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Both your parents? Both of them, yeah.

[B]

But yeah, there's like a bit of Syrian, bit of Egyptian, stuff like that.

[A]

Oh, nice for you. Thank God he's not a white dude. I've never Dated a white dude, right? I've seen the film. Get out. Okay. Ain't no way, okay? I'm not stupid. So now let's get to the next most important question, which is, what does he do for work?

[B]

I just want to feed people.

[A]

Well, well, well, you just happen to be in luck, mister, because I is a girl that loves to

[B]

your nine to five me. What was that job? If you don't want me, ask.

[A]

Yeah, no, of course. Oh, my God. A man that asks questions. Excuse me. Excuse me. I'm having aneurysm. Honestly, I've been on dates before where the men never ask questions. They're too busy talking about theirselves. Sometimes I speak Arabic to them and then they go, oh, yeah, yeah, that was great. Anyway, do you know what I mean? One time I was on a date with this guy and I said to him was like, I. I have a candle in my shoe, right? He was like, oh, my God, that's amazing. So as I was saying, but this guy, he was asking me questions back. He was listening, he was interested as well as interesting. Do you know what I'm saying? That's right, you carry on with those mistakes. So I told him this is the truth. I told him what I did for work. I used to work in a university and I loved it because I loved helping people. Me and him matched in that way. Like, he liked feeding people, I liked helping people. Like, hello, guys. That's got Hairy Bikers written all over. Hello. We need our own TV show, please. The title still works. We've got North African, Arab, Middle Eastern blood, and that equals hair. We have lots of hair. Our platelets are made of hair.

[B]

I like to travel to the Middle east when I go to the airport. On both sides, like racism and then reverse racism. How does a white guy have this name? And they'll say, where are you from? And I'll say, well, clearly I'm British because I got a British passport. They're like, yeah, with a name like Tarek Elianfi.

[A]

Oh, my God. Guys, okay, so far, we both love food, we share a culture. He's asking questions and listening, and we both experience racism. Tick, tick, tick. Be still my fluttering hijab. So although we had a lot of things in common and things that were similar, I still wanted to know his type and I wanted to know if it could be me.

[B]

People are like, what's your type? I'm like, woman.

[A]

I hate men that answer like that. Honestly, if the producer wasn't there, I would have knocked him out. I Swear to you, you go, what's your type? They go, I don't have a type. It's all vibes. Yeah. Why are you lying? And I know it's a lie because I saw this online video and there was a petite girl and she had like free trays of food, like chips, burgers and donuts. And she ate them all, right? And there was all these guys in the comments going, I love a girl that can eat. I love a girl that can eat. So. So I come in the comments and I was like, hello. Yoo hoo. Yoo hoo. And then they go, not like that. It's a liberty, innit? So I didn't like that vague answer. So I asked him if he dated in his ethnic group and if he dated non Arabs as well. And he said to me, he does. Cause his family's mixed.

[B]

My mom was sort of raised Catholic, but my dad was more sort of Sunni Muslim. But you know, we grew up with like candles, you know, my mom loves a candle.

[A]

Oh my God, guys, I've got a candle in my shoe. She is gonna love me. From talking to Tariq, I felt like he was open minded. And for him it was more about the connection. But I wanted to know what he was looking for in a partner.

[B]

As a kid, I was like, very insecure, right? So it was just always to be like, I think the first girl to touch my hand are gonna marry her.

[A]

You are terrible. You know how terrible? You're not trying to ruin my life. Listen, keep your ass to yourself. I've already touched his hand back up. So when you're on a date also, you always talk about, you know, the classic what's your worst date? And boy, oh boy, did Tarek have stories.

[B]

I realized about 10 minutes in this was a recruitment date. No, with Scientology.

[A]

I stuck for a long time. Basically, right? He met this girl on a night out and then they met like a few days later or whatever. And then she tried to recruit him. This girl's smart, man. She's like stealing my ideas, literally. Do you know what I'm saying? Surprise. Thank you for coming to the New to Islam meeting. He also told me another story that

[B]

started with, I once got locked down naked in a balcony.

[A]

Who is this guy? Who is this guy? He also told me another story. You'll be glad to know this was the last one, but I'll. I think this was the worst.

[B]

She's a business.

[A]

I'm sorry, say what? When he said this, right, I thought it was some kind of fetish thing. Yeah, like for real. You know how people marry trees and walls and buildings. And I thought, shit, this geezer's thing is businesses. I didn't know. But it turns out, yeah, basically he went on a date with this girl and it was going really well and they were seeing each other quite a bit and stuff like that. And then it turns out she was a bloody escort. Yeah, exact. And she asked him for 10k a month. I know. There's me thinking, I've had really bad dates. Yeah. Like my worst date, I went on a date with this guy and it was a coffee date. And at the end of it, he said to me, we've had a good time. Do you want to get something to eat? And I said to him, okay. And then he went into his backpack and pulled out a packed lunchbox. I swear to God. I swear. And he goes to me, this is my lunch from today. I didn't eat at work. Do you want to share it? You know, And I picked up the phone, I called 999, okay. And I said, please, can you attend because there's been a murder. So that's my worst state. But I think he's blown me out of the water. What the hell with all this bad luck, all these shitty days. I wanted to know if Tariq had hope, like for the future. Hope for love, hope for relationships.

[B]

Doesn't matter what the hell is going on in the world. You can have a shitter day and you look like a child and the wonderment that they have and whatever. And you're like, there is still magic in the world.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it is not just because they're a child. It is everywhere. You just have to go from. So, yeah, I am very hopeful.

[A]

He's so polite and so thoughtful and engaged in our conversation, and he was genuinely interested in me as a person. Like, getting to know me. It was all positive. And I know you lot of little nosy bitches, okay. And you want to know if you went on a second date. Well, it turns out Tariq is here tonight. He's here right now. This is actually our second day and then our third one. We're getting married. So we're going to bring him out now and chat to him. Please welcome Terry. So tell us, why did we not go on a second date?

[B]

The reason why we didn't go on a second date is because I have someone to confess to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I have a wife waiting at home

[A]

who's watching ocean look up the Tara.

[B]

Guys, thank you very much.

[A]

So no guys I'm sorry, I'm still single and if you want to date me, get in touch. Yeah, but please be aware that my producer will be the third win and it will be for a Radio 4 show and I will record it and write loads of of jokes about you. So, yeah, if that's the kind of stuff you're into, then get in touch. A Match Made Inshallah was written and performed by me, Batya El Ghori. It was produced by Laura Grimshaw and it was an unusual production for BBC Radio 4. I'm Eleni Jones. And I'm Mark Kermode. And in screenshot, we guide you through

[B]

the ever changing landscape of the moving image. I really like any story about self delusion.

[A]

My intent is to allow the audience to see the shining through these people's eyes, meeting those on both sides of the camera and uncovering fascinating insights into what we watch. How would you describe the difference between the doppelganger and the clone? Why is it such a cinematic subject? What was your relationship like with your double? Screenshot from BBC Radio 4. Listen now on BBC Sounds.