Andy Richter Returns

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

Episode: Andy Richter Returns

Date: September 24, 2025
Guests: Andy Richter, Conan O’Brien, Matt Gourley
Theme: Andy Richter discusses his surreal and hilarious journey as a contestant on “Dancing with the Stars,” with plenty of classic Conan-Andy banter about friendship, showbiz, aging, and the pains and rewards of stepping way outside one’s comfort zone.

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Episode Overview

This episode features Conan’s longtime friend and collaborator Andy Richter, who returns to the podcast after being cast in "Dancing with the Stars" (DWTS). The episode is a comedic deep-dive into Andy’s anxieties over dancing on live television, the realities of practicing with a professional ballroom dancer while managing aging knees and a soon-to-be-replaced hip, and the nature—and mechanics—of modern celebrity reality TV. The old friends riff on the absurdities of showbiz, physical decline, and their own friendship, keeping the conversation both heartfelt and uproariously funny.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Reunion & Andy’s Scorn (01:19 - 02:14)

• Andy’s Opening Jab:
  "I feel resentful that it took me to be on Dancing with the Stars for Conan O'Brien to remember that I'm his friend." — Andy Richter [01:19]
• Conan playfully accuses Andy of briefly forgetting his last name, lampooning the Irishness they share.

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2. Conan & Andy’s Long Friendship (03:12 - 04:48)

• Conan reminisces about their decade-spanning friendship, describing them as “confederates” and cracking jokes about years of imagined “heists.”
• Notable Quote: "We've known each other a long time. You're doing this, you're doing this show. And we can talk about other things as well. But I brought you in here. Cause I thought I said, get me Andy Richter." — Conan O'Brien [03:12]

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3. Dancing Phobias & Accepting the Challenge (04:49 - 06:57)

• Andy reveals a lifelong discomfort with dance.
• Relates past traumatic dance experiences—including dodging wedding dances and getting angry with choreography while filming sitcoms.
• Why Did Andy Agree?
  Andy describes initially wanting to decline DWTS, but quickly realizing, “I have to do this… because crabby baby does not want to be pushed out of his comfort zone” [05:52].
• Andy discloses he’s doing DWTS despite knee problems and a diagnosis requiring hip replacement:
  “I need a new left hip… this is like a big bon voyage to my old arthritic hip.” — Andy Richter [06:33]

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4. The Reality of Live TV & Training with Emma Slater (06:57 - 11:47)

• Conan and Andy joke about leveraging Andy’s medical condition for votes, imagining a grand entrance featuring his orthopedic surgeon presenting x-rays for pity points [07:08-08:10].
• Andy discusses DWTS rehearsal:
  “You rehearse four hours a day, seven days a week.” — Andy Richter [10:48]
• Reports finding support and fun with his pro partner, Emma Slater, who is universally beloved by staff:
  “She is just so much fun… you’ve got the best one.” [10:34]
• Conan lauds Andy’s comedic DWTS TikToks, suggesting making videos alone would be worth it.

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5. The Mental Battle & Getting the Moves Down (11:47 - 15:27)

• Andy describes the struggle of learning dance steps and the incremental progress via repetition:
  “…slowly, as you with repetition and commitment and dedication to not just throwing a fit and running out, it’s like the wiring starts to be built up.” [12:18]
• Humorous look at the pressure to stand out on live TV: Andy’s daughter advises, “Dad, don't smile too much” [20:51], wary of overdoing the ‘TV grin’.

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6. Inside the World of DWTS (21:07 - 24:24)

• The show is truly live (“No, it’s live. It is really, truly live.” — Andy Richter [21:31]), with specific instructions for dealing with on-air injuries.
• Andy highlights the camaraderie among contestants, likening their “show and tell” practices to joining a cult, cheered by “all being scared kids in front of each other.” [22:10]
• Finds reassurance in doing it right during rehearsal, lessening stage anxiety.

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7. Sabotage and Sabotage Fantasies (24:24 - 26:57)

• Conan explores devious ways to sabotage the competition; the group jokes about dosing rivals with “lead in lunches” (causing mental fog) or “the poops,” using bodily functions for comedic effect.
• "I would give them the poops… they're all wearing really tight costumes." — Matt Gourley [24:50]

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8. Physicality, Performance, and Ballroom Culture (26:26 - 27:28)

• Andy comments on the openness and lack of body shame among dancers.
  “There's something almost kind of like animal… beautiful, incredible animals that are doing animally things.” [26:32]

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9. The Voting Hustle & What’s Next (27:28 - 34:38)

• Andy outlines DWTS voting logistics: it’s live-only and time-limited, which tricks many viewers. Voting windows disadvantage some time zones.

• Notable Quote:
  “They're asking you to vote for your favorite dancer. Not the best dancer, the favorite dancer.” — Andy Richter [28:56]

• Andy shares hopes for staying on the show, largely relying on Emma’s online campaign.

• Next hurdle: performing a tango to “It’s Raining Men.”

• Andy gives practical voting instructions and jokes, “You’d be an idiot not to” vote for them. [32:23]

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10. Aches, Replacement Hips, and Medical Pragmatism (33:07 - 34:38)

• Conan worries about Andy’s hip “exploding.”
• Andy is matter-of-fact about needing surgery, saying, “I’m saving that for January. That’ll be my big New Year’s present to myself as a new hip… everybody says that it’s a wonderful thing to get done.” [33:47]
• Both share a readiness to address health issues head-on.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Conan on friendship:
  “I’m your friend, maybe your oldest friend, maybe your only true friend, and I want to help you in your cause.” [31:52]

• Andy, on why he’s there:
  “For me, this is a TV job. I take all different kinds of TV jobs. I’m here to serve a purpose, adding fun and value to this production.” [19:22]

• On sabotage:
  “I would give them the poops… because they’re all wearing really tight…the costume." — Matt Gourley [24:52]
  Conan: “Lead is kind of funnier because they just can’t—their brain isn’t working.” [25:12]

• Andy’s attitude:
  “Don’t smile too much… you know, like. And I know what she means.” [20:55]

• On learning dance:
  “I did slowly learn it and I did slowly kind of get a handle on it and you would be able to do it, but, you know, but it is like, I wouldn't be doing this for fun. I'm doing this because I got hired to do it.” — Andy Richter [19:22]

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Key Timestamps - Segment Highlights

• Reunion and Banter (01:19 - 04:48)
• Andy on Dancing Fears & Acceptance (04:49 - 06:57)
• Hip Replacement & Health (06:18, 33:07, 33:47)
• DWTS Rehearsal & Emma Slater Tribute (10:34 - 11:05)
• Making Comedy TikToks (11:05 - 11:47)
• Live TV, DWTS Rehearsals, and Camaraderie (21:07 - 24:24)
• Sabotaging Rivals (24:24 - 26:57)
• Voting and Fan Mobilization (27:28 - 30:33, 32:23 - 33:06)

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Summary

The episode is a candid, riotously funny, and sneakily moving reflection on late-life spontaneity, the indignities and joys of aging, and real showbiz friendship. Conan and Andy’s rapport is on full display, leavening insight with biting wit. Andy’s journey on DWTS is framed less as a quest for victory than as an adventure in pushing boundaries, embracing discomfort, and finding comedy in the midst of the absurd. For DWTS and podcast fans alike, it’s a celebration of taking risks, leaning on friends, and finding humor in awkwardness—laced with classic Conan-Andy zaniness at every turn.

Transcript

[Conan O'Brien]

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[Andy Richter]

Live free.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's Sonic.

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[Andy Richter]

Hi, my name is Andy Richter, and I feel resentful that it took me to be on Dancing with the Stars for Conan o' Brien to remember that I'm his friend.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh. And I'm not offended at all that there's a hitch in your voice after Conan because you were searching for my last name right after we've known each other since the summer of 1993. After Conan O'. Connell.

[Andy Richter]

It's just because it's. It's. It's just an Irish thing.

[Conan O'Brien]

I understand.

[Andy Richter]

They all look alike. Fall is here Hear the yell Back to school Ring the bell Brand new shoes Walking blues Climb the fence Books.

[Matt Gourley]

And pens I can tell that we.

[Andy Richter]

Are gonna be friends I can tell that we are gonna be friends this.

[Conan O'Brien]

Is a very special episode.

[Andy Richter]

Yes.

[Conan O'Brien]

Where we talk about kleptomania. No, this is a very special episode because you're on Dancing with the Stars. I am fascinated with what goes on at these reality shows. And this is one of the big ones.

[Andy Richter]

And.

[Conan O'Brien]

And I know I've brought in. I wouldn't even allow. I fired Matt Gourley and I brought in. I brought in David Hopping because David loves all reality shows.

[Andy Richter]

Something good has already come from this he's not. Fuck you, Goerly.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

Oops.

[Conan O'Brien]

Who's gonna force James Bond into the conversation? Me talking to an A list star. I understand you just had a battle with cancer. Yeah. The third James Bond.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Terrace Billick.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah. Tropic of Canc. An alternate title for Moon Breaker.

[Conan O'Brien]

It was originally Jawbreaker, About a candy, but they changed it. Listen. You're going to listen to me.

[Andy Richter]

I am.

[Conan O'Brien]

We have been good friends and confederates. I like to use the word confederates.

[Andy Richter]

Because we've been involved in many, many heists.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's my secret confederate, Andy Richter. We've known each other a long time. You're doing this, you're doing this show. And we can talk about other things as well. But I brought you in here. Cause I thought I said, get me Andy Richter. And they said, he doesn't want to come on. Oh, and then we met your friend.

[Andy Richter]

I'm here twice a week.

[Conan O'Brien]

I know you're here all the time. It's ridiculous. But anyway, I want to know. First of all, I was watching you do your routine the other night, and I was thinking. I couldn't remember all of that. I just couldn't remember. I could. I would go. My mind would go blank. Whenever I've had to do any choreography, I've told them, you need to keep it to three moves.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Like I'm a.

[Andy Richter]

An old pony on Andy Richter controls the universe.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

They had. And it was very. And I, I, I objected to it because I just thought it was kind of hacky and overdone. They had a fantasy musical sequence that they wanted to break into. And I was like, really? Okay. And they said, yeah, we're going to have it and it'll be choreographed dancing. And I said, and I be. Just because I was exploiting being number one on the call sheet. I was like, I will come in at the end and do jazz hands, but I will not do anything else. Because anytime I had had to learn choreography, Hulk smash. I'd get so mad, you know, like.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, I've seen Hulk smash. Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah. And. And I just, I'd get so furious because I couldn't get it from here to there.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

And. And also Jen, my wife, reminded me that on, on our wedding, she said, like, well, you know, what about our dance together? And I was like, shortest song possible. And that was my only. There was no, like, let's go to Arthur Murray and learn something. I was like, no, I don't want, I don't want all those eyes on us for that long.

[Conan O'Brien]

So don't you feel. I know you're not.

[Matt Gourley]

You went on Dancing with the Stars.

[Conan O'Brien]

I know. That's what I'm thinking right now is that there is a God, and he watched all that and said, he shall go on Dancing with the Stars.

[Andy Richter]

Here's your hubris. It's an email from your agent. Oh, no. Yeah. No. In April, I got an email about doing it, about being they. You know, here's your invitation to be on Dancing with the Stars. And I was. I was home at the time. It was in the morning. And my honest to God, my first reaction was, turn it down and don't tell anyone. Like, don't let anyone know that I've been asked, like, because they'd be like, why wouldn't you do it? And it's like. Cause, you know, crabby baby does not want to be pushed out of his comfort zone, basically, is the long and short of it. But of course, like, within two seconds, I was like, I have to do this. Yeah, I have to do this.

[Conan O'Brien]

It looks like fun.

[Andy Richter]

I'm. It is pretty fun. Yeah. And I'm also. It's like, I'm 58 years old. I got problem knees. I. You know, all kinds of stuff going on. As a side note, just who should.

[Conan O'Brien]

Be dancing on television.

[Andy Richter]

Yes, exactly. I got. But. But. And also, too. What's even better is that, like. And this was April, I said yes. And then, like, in July, they figured out what all the leg pain and stuff had been going on is, because I need a hip replacement.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, wow.

[Andy Richter]

So I need a new left hip. And I was like, hey, you know, the minute I was like, I'm supposed to be doing Dancing with the Stars, which was a violation of the NDA, and I could have been fired to tell my doctors, but they're like, yeah, you should be all right. And they, you know, I got, like, some kind of injection that was supposed to sort of help. And it did help, but, like, I'm gonna. This is like, a big bon voyage to my old arthritic hip.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know what I think. Because this is what comes to mind, because I'm always trying to game the system, and I very much want you to do well on this show. You've got judges that are looking at you.

[Andy Richter]

Yes.

[Conan O'Brien]

And I think you should begin every number with us. There's a silhouette of someone walking out, and it's your orthopedic surgeon.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And he has actual. He has actual imaging of your decrepit.

[Andy Richter]

Hip on the big screen.

[Conan O'Brien]

Big screen.

[Andy Richter]

My mri.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's your mri. And he says, as you can see here, there's the flaring of the joint where the. Where the. The bone slips into the socket. And we've lost too much calcium there. It's cracked. And so this man. And that should be like a golf hand.

[Andy Richter]

Absolutely.

[Conan O'Brien]

They should add 15 points.

[Andy Richter]

Y. Absolutely. Like, instead of the tape package about me and Emma practicing, it should just be like, there. His. His hip bone has always. Or his femur has always had an impingement, which means that it's not spherical, it's egg shaped. So his entire life it's been, like, building up and like, you know, like bone on bone rubbing against each other.

[Conan O'Brien]

But also, he should be. Your surgeon should be doing commentary as you're dancing.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, that's a major load bearing move. The pain he's reaching now would be at least an 8.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

If 10. If 10 is visibly uncomfortable. He's at an 8 right now. He's at a 9. Now he's at a 2.

[Andy Richter]

He's just twirling around the dance floor.

[Conan O'Brien]

Twirling. And I mean, do you think about it? That would. I think that, no, I don't be a hero.

[Andy Richter]

I. I just am, like, powering through it and just. And it does. I do take solace in the fact that, like, the people who are much younger than me, which is everybody, but the ones that are even much younger than me in their 20s, are like, my legs hurt, my knees hurt. I go home and, you know, and just ache. And I certainly do at night. It's like I lay in bed and it just hurts, you know, so it's. I just. Lots of Advil and ice, and that's it, you know? But then I thought, no, I need to do this. I need to do this, like, just to get moving. And it got me to go to the gym and do cardio, which I loathe. Started to do a lot more stretching just to kind of prepare myself. And then, like, the week before I met my partner, I was, like, having stress dreams. I was just dreading it and just felt like crap for the whole week before. Just like kind of crabby to my family and stuff. And then I went, but I signed up for it. I was gonna do it. Was terrified that I was going to get injured, that I just wouldn't be able to do it. Like you said.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

Like, I'm not going to be able to remember all that. I'm not going to.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

And then would have to, like, pull out and be embarrassed. And, you know, as one is when One pulls out and I didn't think you'd go there. I did, though.

[Conan O'Brien]

I thought. No, Andy did. I would do it. I thought of it and I. You know what? I thought of it and I let it go. Oh, that's how. That's how low this is.

[Andy Richter]

That is bad.

[Conan O'Brien]

Thought of it and pulled out, huh? Sounds like my wedding night pulled out. Now I was in embarrassed.

[Matt Gourley]

You still did it.

[Conan O'Brien]

I did it afterwards.

[Matt Gourley]

I know.

[Conan O'Brien]

So now I win.

[Andy Richter]

Exactly. I'm guilty and you're innocent.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's right. Enjoy your jail while I get on my victory yacht. This is all happening in my head. Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah. But then I luckily was paired with just a sweet angel of a ballroom dancer.

[Conan O'Brien]

Her name is Slater, Emma Slater. She seems lovely.

[Andy Richter]

She's fantastic. And. And I. And there were so many people around there, like, from promo people to security guards to different people. Like, stagehands are like, oh, you got the best one.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, nice.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah. Because she is just so much fun. And you are. You rehearse four hours a day, seven days a week.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Okay, so I'm gonna bring up something that I think is your secret weapon, which is you've been making these videos and Emma Slater is in a bunch of them.

[Andy Richter]

No, she's the Cecil B. DeMille of our TikTok presence.

[Conan O'Brien]

We've been doing a bunch of videos and I started looking at your videos. I don't know how to access these things.

[Andy Richter]

Right, No, I know someone showed them to you.

[Conan O'Brien]

David brought me this.

[Andy Richter]

Your dog.

[Conan O'Brien]

My dog brought me what's, I think called an E phone. But I was looking at it, I was like, andy's really funny and he's making these funny videos, which you, you know, did at our late night show thousands of times. And I'm looking at you just be super funny. And I was like, oh, this is great. I mean, if there wasn't. If you didn't even get to do the rest, if they somehow said, no, no, we're canceling the dancing part. You're just going to make these videos. I'd think this is a home run.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah. Oh, thank you. Well, I just, you know, I went into the thing, as I said, dreading it, but still resolved to be open. Resolved to saying yes. Resolve to being compliant, and. Which is really in these days. But I started.

[Conan O'Brien]

I will not have political commentary on this show. Back to how much Advil you're having and what kind of inflammation you're suffering from. This is a medical show, not a political show.

[Andy Richter]

But so, you know, I started doing the rehearsals With Emma, and. And it was like it Hulk smash was there. Like, she was trying to just show me, like, the basic steps, and I'd watch her do it and then try to do it myself. And it really was like I couldn't do it. But then slowly, as you with repetition and commitment and dedication to not just throwing, you know, throwing a fit and running out, it's like the wiring starts to right. Be built up. Whether or whether it's like wiring that was there, that was, like, somehow crusted over. Like, it's now, you know, we're going from the first dance into the second dance and from a cha cha to a tango, and it's easier, much easier to learn the second one. And I'm assuming it's going to be easier to learn the third one. God willing and America willing, if you people vote me off, you're making a big, big mistake. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, I always find. I always find that if you want people to vote for you, it's really good to threaten them.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah, yeah. Oh, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know.

[Conan O'Brien]

You should do it on the show.

[Andy Richter]

Oh, you better.

[Conan O'Brien]

You better. I know who you are.

[Andy Richter]

The doctor can also do that part.

[Conan O'Brien]

The doctor can do that part.

[Andy Richter]

My partner on Tuesday because Bruno the. That one of the judges gave me a four, and they mentioned four out of four out of ten, right? It was. I tied with Corey Feldman for the lowest score. But I'm like, I'm 30 years older than fucking everybody. What do you want from me? But when we were up in the skybox with Julianne afterwards, and they gave the scores and he gave a four, and everybody in the place went, boo. And I went, yeah, get him. And she said, no one has ever done that.

[Conan O'Brien]

Get him. Never done that before.

[Andy Richter]

Like, told the crowd, yeah, get the judge. Yeah, you know, So I was like, oh, okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

You always know what to say in those situations. It's funny you brought that up. And you always know what to say in the right situation. And I remember one time we were in the studio and, you know, we're in 30 Rock and we're in our studio, and there's no windows or anything, and it suddenly the power went out and the lights just went. The lights went out and it went, like, pretty black. Just was, like, the lights went out, went black. And Andy, without missing a second, went, my pearls. In, like, old 1930s movies, my pearls. My pearls have been stolen. Yeah, but you just said my pearl pearls. That's what comes to mind. Now would you say, get him? That's. Those are the things that are just going to come out of here. There's nothing that can be done.

[Andy Richter]

No, I. It's like I don't even. It's not like I sit around going like now when the lights go out, remember, say my pearls, right? It just comes out.

[Conan O'Brien]

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[Matt Gourley]

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[Conan O'Brien]

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[Matt Gourley]

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[Conan O'Brien]

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[Andy Richter]

I don't know if it's.

[Conan O'Brien]

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[Matt Gourley]

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[Conan O'Brien]

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[Matt Gourley]

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[Conan O'Brien]

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[Matt Gourley]

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[Conan O'Brien]

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[Matt Gourley]

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[Conan O'Brien]

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[Andy Richter]

All right?

[Conan O'Brien]

No one asked me, but I'm telling you, the kind that makes everything else in your day fade into the background. You know, I've been there at the birth of a child, but then bitten into a Sonic Smasher and I forget that I had a child. That's how good it is. Always made to order, served hot off the grill, piled high with melty cheese and tangy smasher sauce. Juicy, savory, built for maximum satisfaction. It's everything a burger should be and could be. Fresh, flavorful, and just dangerous enough to make you forget you had other plans. Buy one, get one Sonic Smasher in the Sonic app for a limited time. Live free. Eat Sonic.

[Andy Richter]

I did slowly learn it and I did slowly kind of get a handle on it and you would be able to do it, but, you know, but it is like, I wouldn't be doing this for fun. I'm doing this because I got hired to do it. And I've said this too. Over there, a lot of these people, you know, they're reality stars or they're, you know, athletes and things. And it's like, for me, this is a TV job. I. I take all different kinds of TV jobs. I've been on all different kinds of tv, and I'm doing basically the same thing in all of them. But, I mean, not so much when I'm. When I'm acting, but certainly with these kind of live and live Ish shows. I know, like, okay, I understand how all this works. I understand how it's put together, right? And I'm here to serve a purpose and of adding fun and value to this production, right? Like, we'd be doing, you know, these rehearsals, and in some of them, she'd be like, you know, you gotta sell it more. And I was like, you turn it on, make the faces and stuff, but it's like, I'm not gonna waste the faces when we're doing it for the 17th time on, you know, Thursday, right? We went into the camera rehearsal on Monday, and I saw a tape of it. And what I thought was giving them the camera version of selling it, I realized was nothing. It didn't look like anything. So I was like, oh, okay, tomorrow, bigger. Got to really go big, big, big. Without my. My daughter. My older daughter did say, dad, don't smile too much. She's like, don't. You know, like. And I know what she means.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, she's probably saying. Because then you're not. You. You're kind of like.

[Andy Richter]

She's kind of saying that. But you also have seen people, you know, like, on. They give that.

[Conan O'Brien]

They give the 10,000 megawatt, like, Lawrence.

[Andy Richter]

Welk dancers, like they always were, grinning like they. I don't know, you know, like they were in the afterglow.

[Conan O'Brien]

I think he would shock them if they didn't. He had a big generator out back. So how scary is it when you're just about to. You know, when you're standing there and you're in silhouette and you're facing away from the camera and, you know, this music's kicking in. Is it fight or flight kind of stuff?

[Andy Richter]

No, it wasn't that.

[Conan O'Brien]

Can you redo it if something goes horribly wrong?

[Andy Richter]

No, it's live. It is really, truly live.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's live.

[Andy Richter]

And in fact, they give you. They give You a little talk beforehand that, like, if. And I mean, direction was like, you know, if you're hurt, keep going. Unless, like, you're really hurt, and then you'll put your hand up, and then I'll cut away from you. But until you. If you hurt yourself or fall, like. Like, he's like, I want to keep the camera on you, and I'm gonna keep the camera on you. He said, but if you, like, really hurt, raise your hand and then I'll know to cut away to somebody else.

[Conan O'Brien]

Someone being sawn in half.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah. Somebody eating a human hand.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

But one day, about a week before, all four couples that were there at that point, we all did our dance for each other. They call it a show and tell. And it was Baron Davis, Jen Affleck, Danielle Fischel, and me. So it's NBA All Star, a reality star, One of the Mormon housewives. Danielle was on Boy Meets World and was like everybody's teenage crush and me. And so it's like people from different accomplished backgrounds, all being scared kids in front of each other doing this thing for the first time for somebody other than just their partner. And it felt like everyone, you know, we all cheer for each other. When they were all done cheering, I was like. I said, I feel like I've joined a cult because, like, my heart was singing. And I was just like, I did it. And somebody said, now you're gonna have to do that in front of the studio audience and on TV in front of people. And I kind of felt like, well, this is the bubble being burst like this. I did it here. And so, like, okay, now I'm. And I did it right. And I did it. You know, that's the thing. Did I do it right? Did I screw it up? Did I forget anything? And no, I didn't. So I was sort of already ready. And then you get to the ballroom, and you have all day Monday, where you run it a bunch of times. And then Tuesday, you're in that thing from, like, 10:00am until 10:00pm because afterwards, there's all kinds of press and stuff to do. So by the time, like, it's my turn to dance A, I was like 12 out of 14. I was just like, let's get this over with. And I'd been in the room all day, so I was comfortable in the room and comfortable in front of the people. So it was kind of just like, it wasn't hard. And I knew that I knew what I was doing. There is, like, a moment of hope. I remember everything, but other than that it's just. And I do love Emma so much, and we do have so much fun together, and she's been so nice and so supportive that I'm also not alone in it. Like, she and I have been cooking up these things for people and then making silly tiktoks on the side. So it is. It's all pretty fun. You know?

[Conan O'Brien]

Is there a way to harm anyone else that you're competing against? Oh, no, because this is where my head would go. And I don't mean physically harm them. Although if there's an idea for that, we'll take it. What I mean is, is there any way to get in their head or somehow sabotage them or. That's not cool.

[Andy Richter]

I. The only thing I've been doing is lead in lunches. Yeah. Just a little bit of lead in different lunches.

[Conan O'Brien]

But, you know, it does. It's been proven. And your. Your doctor will tell you this. It slows down the neural response.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matt Gourley]

I would. I would give them the poops.

[Conan O'Brien]

What's that?

[Matt Gourley]

I would do something with their lunch.

[Andy Richter]

And, like, give them the diarrhea. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Matt Gourley]

Because they're all wearing really tight. The costume.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, so you want that to happen on live tv?

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah, I know. I'm.

[Andy Richter]

I don't know. Yeah, but then.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, but lead is good. Let's do long term.

[Conan O'Brien]

Lead is kind of funnier because they just can't. Their brain isn't working. Right, right, right, right. And it's. And this is long term damage.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah, it's long term.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, absolutely.

[Matt Gourley]

The poops, they're over it tomorrow. You're talking about, like, permanently impairing these.

[Andy Richter]

But are you. If you on TV in front of a millions of people, would you be over it and the next day. No.

[Conan O'Brien]

That would scar you for life. No, people would be just so horrified by the whole thing.

[Andy Richter]

Nobody relates to pooping.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

But they have to raise their hand to cut the camera.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah. And when the director yells out, what's wrong? The poops.

[Andy Richter]

It's a coming.

[Matt Gourley]

It's not coming. They would zoom in and then just.

[Conan O'Brien]

Catch a studio audience. It's a crane shot from outside the studio at abc and people were just streaming out, running for their lives.

[Andy Richter]

Yep.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, thanks, Sona, for bringing it around.

[Matt Gourley]

I'm helping.

[Andy Richter]

No, we did say one of the stars. And y' all can look up. Whoever it is just gave birth, like, four weeks ago. And we have been making jokes about, you know, like, the strength of pelvic floor. And. And is there urine being Sprayed around during tosses and things.

[Conan O'Brien]

This is the stuff I wanted to get Andy.

[Andy Richter]

Well, I also will tell you, too.

[Conan O'Brien]

I mean, this is the good stuff.

[Andy Richter]

Dancers are, like, very physically oriented, and, like, there's not a lot of body shame. Yeah, yeah, exactly. You know, so there's something almost kind of like. Like, animal, you know, it's like, where it's just a bunch of, like, beautiful, incredible animals that are doing animally things. Jumping and leaping and, you know.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right.

[Andy Richter]

There's just, like, very little sort of personal boundaries.

[Conan O'Brien]

But they're athletes. They're just great athletes.

[Andy Richter]

Absolutely athletes. Yeah, definitely. And also, you're, you know, you're holding on to somebody through this whole thing. You know, it's. It's there. There's a lot of physical contact, but. But, yeah, especially. Cause, like, Eastern Europeans, it's just another sport. It's just another. You know, you can be a gymnast, or you could be a soccer player, or you can be a ballroom dancer. And it is incredibly, you know, athletic and sporty. It is. You know, it's all competition. So.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay, this is coming out six days from now. So what's your next hurdle? What's it gonna be? What's your. What's coming up that you have to overcome in order to stay on what I call dwts?

[Andy Richter]

Wow, that was good.

[Conan O'Brien]

You look like you're a burger. Well, there's so many. I'll be honest with you. I had a lead burger this morning, so I'm doing pretty well.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah, we'll have a pizza led pizz.

[Conan O'Brien]

Instead of the pepperoni. Yeah. Giant lead coins.

[Andy Richter]

Wait, what was the question?

[Conan O'Brien]

I don't know.

[Matt Gourley]

What's next?

[Andy Richter]

Oh, what's next? Yeah. We are doing a tango to It's Raining Men.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay.

[Andy Richter]

Which will have already happened, and I don't.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, but as we're speaking right now, how many days out are you from that?

[Andy Richter]

This is Thursday, and that'll be Tuesday.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay.

[Andy Richter]

And you said this is airing Wednesday.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right.

[Andy Richter]

So my fate will have been decided by America then. But, I mean, I kind of. I kind of feel like I'm remaining very hopeful that I'll stick around for a little bit, because I do think, like, it's a TV show and when people are voting. And also, I mean, I. I am again, relying so much on Emma's online presence and her sort of military campaign to get people to vote for us. I think I'll stick around because I do kind of feel like it is a TV show, and the question isn't, like, who's the dancer. It's like, who do you want to see in the TV show? Is ultimately what it ends up being like. If you're going to watch this show next week, who do you want to see in the TV show if somebody has to go. And like one of the EP said at one point and it struck me was they're asking you to vote for your favorite dancer. Not the best dancer, the favorite dancer. So that can be whatever it means to any. Anybody watching and anybody taking the trouble to vote, which the voting is weird. And I guess I knew this, but I didn't understand it. You only vote while the show is on live, which is from 8 to 10 on the East Coast, 7 to 9 in Midwest. So that also means here you got to vote from five to seven. You got to vote three hours before the show airs in order to have your vote count. So if you're watching it on ABC or Disney plus or whatever here in Los Angeles and you're watching it in the delay, tape delay, you can't vote. So you. It's like for people on the west coast and in mountain time, if they want to vote, they're voting based on their preference from last week, sort of, I guess, because you don't know what they're. What the dance is.

[Conan O'Brien]

I thought you were going to reveal that there's like an electoral college too.

[Andy Richter]

No, no.

[Conan O'Brien]

In some states there's.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah, but like they were.

[Conan O'Brien]

People have more electors.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah. I was doing interviews today. We rehearsed and I did interviews and. And they were saying like it's a double elimination on Tuesday. How do you feel about that? And I'm like, I don't know. I mean, I. What can I do that I did as much as I could and. And I'll do as much as I can.

[Conan O'Brien]

Which is until every other dancer has diarrhea. You have not done all that you can do.

[Andy Richter]

Yes, he's on board now.

[Matt Gourley]

He's gone to those diarrhea.

[Andy Richter]

I have come around every other dance, every other dancer's family remains unthreatened. You know, I have not done enough or remain. No can always do better.

[Matt Gourley]

And I can take care of it.

[Conan O'Brien]

We can take care of this. You take care of the diarrhea. I've got some very soft Roman lead. It's from the piping in Rome that brought down the empire. And I am going to be sprinkling that in the other dancers burritos.

[Matt Gourley]

You know what I was thinking?

[Andy Richter]

A lot of burritos backstage.

[Matt Gourley]

I was thinking about if I ever saw you do any choreography, choreographed dance. And I remembered your K Pop video and how you. You just. You couldn't really get it.

[Conan O'Brien]

What do you mean I couldn't get it? I killed that thing.

[Matt Gourley]

I don't know. He was having trouble. He kept on, like. I feel like you kept forgetting how to do the string dance.

[Conan O'Brien]

I. I think I. I will say, I think you did great in the K Pop video, but you did do an Irish dance where you kicked a girl in the face.

[Matt Gourley]

You did kick a girl in the face.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, first of all, she had a.

[Andy Richter]

I don't know what's more Irish than that.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. I'm just saying she had a little bit of an attitude beforehand. See, Irish. That's how the Irish take care of things.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

No, there is footage of me accidentally kicking a young girl in the car.

[Andy Richter]

I remember that.

[Conan O'Brien]

And then we showed it again and again in slow motion. I did bring her out on a massive. In front of a massive crowd at the Chicago theater and kicked her again. Such a good prank. All right, so, Andy, I'm your friend, maybe your oldest friend, maybe your only true friend, and I want to help you in your cause. So maybe you could give us some information. How can people vote for Andy and Emma?

[Andy Richter]

They can vote for us. And again, you have to do it Pacific, 5 to 7pm on Tuesdays, East Coast, 8 to 10 on Tuesdays. And that is your window for voting. And you can text Andy a N, D, Y. It's with a y to 21523. And you can do that 10 times per couple per method of voting. The other way to vote is online to DWTSVote. DWTSVote.ABC.com and there again, you can vote 10 times per couple. So you don't have to vote all for us, but you'd be an idiot not to.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's true.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, Andy, good luck.

[Andy Richter]

Thank you.

[Conan O'Brien]

Keep enjoying it, because that's key. And take care of yourself.

[Andy Richter]

I am.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

I mean, I'm just worried about your. Your hip exploding.

[Andy Richter]

No, no, no. It'll be fine. And the doctor said. I did say, like. Yeah, but do I have to. I was like. I just said, like. Like, am I gonna have to worry about. Like, it's snapping at some point? It's like. No, no, no. You'll be. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

What does he know?

[Andy Richter]

I know.

[Conan O'Brien]

I know you. You didn't go to the best doctor.

[Andy Richter]

I did. I did. It's a. Yeah. It's a horrible clinic.

[Conan O'Brien]

You tore a piece of paper off a lamppost.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah. Yeah. Need a new hip.

[Conan O'Brien]

And I. And I. Yeah.

[Andy Richter]

No, and I'm gonna. I'm. I'm saving that for January. That'll be my big New Year's present to myself as a new hip. And. But everybody says that it's a wonderful thing to get done.

[Conan O'Brien]

Done, sure.

[Andy Richter]

That you heal up real well. It lasts forever. And. And the consistent thing that everybody says is, I wish I'd done it sooner. So, yeah, I don't. I'm not, like, I'm not somebody. When there's like, a medical thing that needs to be done, I'm like, do it.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, I'm that way, too. I'm not a guy that's like you're 90% blocked in your heart. We'll get to that later.

[Andy Richter]

Yeah, yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Now I've got a mountain to climb and liquid cheese to eat. Once I'm done with my cheese, a thon on the Matterhorn, maybe I'll come back and see. All right, Andy Richter, onward and upward.

[Andy Richter]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Podcast Narrator]

Conan o' Brien needs a friend With Conan o' Brien, Sonam of session and Matt Gourley Produced by me, Matt Gourley executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross and Nick Leo. Theme song by the White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples, engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Bautista and Brit Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple podcast and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign [e-mail] Conan and if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O' Brien needs a Friend. Wherever Fine podcasts are downloaded.

[Andy Richter]

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[Podcast Narrator]

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[Conan O'Brien]

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