Danny McBride Returns

Summary

Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend: “Danny McBride Returns”

Original Air Date: July 6, 2026
Host: Conan O’Brien, with Sona Movsesian & Matt Gourley
Guest: Danny McBride

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Overview

In this engaging and irreverent episode, Conan welcomes back writer, actor, and producer Danny McBride (“Eastbound & Down,” “Vice Principals,” “The Righteous Gemstones”) to discuss his new book, "Thrilling Tales of Modern Men," and dig deep into childhood obsessions, the nuances of comedy writing, the intersection of horror and humor, and the enduring weirdness of old friends. The conversation weaves McBride’s personal history, creative process, and current projects with plenty of trademark Conan tangents and comedic banter.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Childhood Nostalgia and Saturday Morning Cartoons

(11:32–16:19)

• Both Conan and Danny reminisce fondly about their Saturday morning cartoon rituals, underlining how influential those shows were on their comedic sensibilities.
• Conan describes devouring the TV Guide’s fall lineup and notes that timing and style from Looney Tunes shaped his sense of comedy.
• Danny clarifies he was a Donald Duck (not Daffy) kid, appreciating Donald’s “always pissed off” energy and tragic, pantless wanderings.
• Other favorites include “Dungeons & Dragons,” “The Littles,” and “Shirt Tales,” with group nostalgia (and ribbing) for these odd shows and their shirt/no-pants dynamics.
  • Notable Quote:
    "Donald Duck is so pissed... The whole universe is always on him all the time. Honestly, he just has this little blue shirt on. Just walking around, pissed off." — Danny McBride (13:54)

2. Religious Upbringing & Early Performing Arts Exposure

(16:23–20:20)

• Danny shares how his Baptist upbringing in Spotsylvania, VA, influenced him, especially through his mother’s church puppet shows.
• He wasn’t overtly religious—he mostly sat doodling in church—but credits enforced stillness and daydreaming with fueling his imagination.
• The family’s experience of divorce and feeling like outsiders at church underscored the particular societal context of the time and region.
  • Notable Quote:
    “For like an hour you had to just be forced to sit there and be quiet. My imagination would run wild during that time.” — Danny McBride (18:36)

3. Creative Empathy: Writing Flawed but Human Characters

(26:02–28:47)

• Conan observes that Danny’s work—especially “Righteous Gemstones”—successfully balances ridicule and empathy for less-than-ideal characters.
• Danny explains that treating flawed protagonists with some affection and depth is key to effective comedy: if the writer’s “disdain” is too obvious, it dulls the impact.
  • Notable Quote:
    “It’s fun to treat them still with a little bit of empathy and even giving them enough depth so there’s layers there… It becomes more unexpected if you’re confused as the audience of where you even kind of sit with this person.” — Danny McBride (27:01)

4. The Comedy–Horror Connection & The “Halloween” Franchise

(27:56–32:39)

• Conan and Danny explore the surprising overlap between horror and comedy—timing, misdirection, and structured tension.
• Danny relates the nerve-wracking experience of pitching the “Halloween” reboot to John Carpenter, then to Jamie Lee Curtis.
• Both hosts and guest agree: many comedians are also obsessed with horror, and the best scripted scares are built like great punchlines.
  • Notable Quote:
    “You’re structuring an experience. With a joke, you want the punchline to get the biggest laugh… It’s the same way with scares. You pace things out… so I think there is a little bit of that architecture [in both genres].” — Danny McBride (28:47)
• Matt Gourley gushes about the 2018 “Halloween” as personal closure from childhood trauma—his babysitter made him watch it at age five.
• Danny describes the thrill (and stress) of getting fan approval at TIFF and the collaborative/chaotic process of brainstorming grisly deaths for Michael Myers.

5. “Thrilling Tales of Modern Men”: The New Book

(37:04–47:43)

• Conan frames much of McBride's work as chronicling “men confronting a world that’s passed them by,” tying together his film/TV characters and new literary effort.
• Danny discusses the urge to test his storytelling chops in a new medium, applying TV writing skills like “cold opens” and rapid-fire plotting to short fiction.
• The flexibility of writing short stories provided a needed creative “cleanse” post-Gemstones: he could explore weird ideas quickly and move on, freeing him from the constraints of serialized TV.
• Danny’s story “Institute of Men” is highlighted—a Kafkaesque tale of a man seeking hair restoration at a bizarre clinic, with “red-flag” questionnaire questions and a macabre twist.
  • Notable Quote:
    "This kind of came to me because I really just wanted to see, could I do that and deliver that same experience... in a totally different format?" — Danny McBride (39:09)
• Danny’s writing process is organic—short morning sessions, notebooks of random ideas while immersed in TV writers’ rooms—eventually evolving into stories, then the collection.
• Editing was intimidating: “I mean, I was living and breathing it for the last year… It’s like a 400-page document. Where the hell do I even start?”

6. Teasing the New G.I. Joe Film

(48:06–49:41)

• Danny reveals he’s scripting a new, grounded, action-centric G.I. Joe movie for Paramount, with familiar collaborators.
• Fans (Matt Gourley especially) are beside themselves with excitement.
  • Notable Quote:
    "This is nuts. I used to do this when I was a kid. Every day I’d make these guys fight each other. Now I’m writing that shit." — Danny McBride (49:31)

7. Friends and Creative Chemistry—Walton Goggins Anecdotes

(50:12–52:17)

• Conan and Danny praise Walton Goggins’ unique presence, recounting their close real-life friendship and travel misadventures (the McBrides are “redneck kids” next to the “magazine-ready” Goggins clan).

8. Recurring Banter: Pens, Doodling, Office Supplies, and Product “Plugs”

(04:13–10:34), (55:45–62:20)

• Early and late in the episode, the team riffs on Conan’s lifelong obsession with pens (especially an Aurora fountain pen), doodles, blotters, and Sona’s improper penmanship technique.
• Blay brags about his Kindle Scribe, sparking a good-natured roast about covert product placement and possible IRS violations (“Blay’s tax evasion saga”), encouraging listeners to “just go for it!” when cheating on taxes, in jest.
  • Notable Quote:
    “I wanted a little stamp that said void… Did you get them? My parents were very nice to me. They would indulge me... I wanted to sign forms and stamp them and put them in a pneumatic tube like in the 1920s.” — Conan O'Brien (06:07)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Writing Characters:
  • “When comedy is written where there is such a disdain for what you’re joking about, it could kind of become boring.” — Danny McBride (27:01)
• On Childhood Obsessions Informing Adult Careers:
  • “There are so many times now where I’m doing something—this is how I goofed around as a kid, and now I’m doing it, and people are saying, ‘And cut. Nicely done.’ I’m not getting yelled at.” — Conan O’Brien (50:01)
• On Walton Goggins:
  • “Walton Goggins is a character you would create. I mean, the person Walton Goggins.” — Conan O’Brien (50:20)
  • “He gave us a full blast of the Goggins.” — Conan O’Brien (51:35)
  • “When we went to Greece, Walton is like in full white linens... I just got my little redneck kids in bad suntans.” — Danny McBride (51:40)

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Important Timestamps

• [11:32] Saturday Morning Cartoons, Looney Tunes, and Donald Duck banter
• [16:23] Danny’s church puppet-show backstory and creative childhood
• [26:13] Empathy for flawed characters in comedy
• [27:56] Comedy & horror parallels; writing “Halloween”
• [37:04] Discussion of "Modern Men" themes, book process
• [44:43] Deep-dive: “Institute of Men” story analysis
• [48:06] G.I. Joe reboot for Paramount
• [50:12] On-screen and off-screen friendship with Walton Goggins
• [55:45 & 62:00] Ongoing bits about taxes and product placement
• [53:42] Conan wraps up, inviting Danny to a future Sturgill Simpson dinner with possible Goggins cameo

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Tone, Energy & Final Thoughts

The episode is freewheeling, packed with tangents, candid humor, and the shocks of nostalgia characteristic of real friendship. The banter between Conan, his team, and McBride never lets up—moving smoothly from sincere insights into the craft of writing to affectionate roast and inside jokes. McBride’s approachability and sharp self-deprecation make his creative accomplishments seem simultaneously impressive and attainable, inspiring both laughter and admiration.

Perfect for: Fans of smart, slightly anarchic comedy; writers; pop-culture obsessives; anyone who loves to see behind the curtain of iconic TV and film—and wants to hear Conan and Danny McBride geek out about everything from ancient pens to G.I. Joe.

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Listen for: McBride’s candid thoughts on why empathy is essential in comedy, detailed steps of making the “Halloween” reboot, and some of the funniest stories ever about Donald Duck and grown-up cartoon fans sneaking into “Saved By The Bell” marathons.

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Recommended Next Steps:

• Pick up Danny McBride’s "Thrilling Tales of Modern Men."
• Check out “The Righteous Gemstones” and the 2018 “Halloween.”
• Get ready for a G.I. Joe resurgence.

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(End of summary)

Transcript

[Conan O'Brien]

When you're on a GLP1, you often experience a smaller appetite. That means for GLP1 users, every bite of food should be as nutritious and delicious as possible. And that's where Sprouts Farmers Market comes in. I knew they'd come in somewhere and I guess now's where they come in. From nutrient dense foods to proteins to supplements that help sustain muscle mass and energy levels, Sprouts has you covered. And with in store wellness experts available, guidance is always within reach for any GLP1 journey or broader health goals. Visit sprouts.com to find a Sprouts Market near you. Coca Cola Zero Sugar is so good, it's almost impossible not to finish it before the meal arrives. It's just too good to wait. That happens to me sometimes.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Me too.

[Conan O'Brien]

You can try rules like no sipping until the appetizer arrives, or you tell your friend, don't let me touch my glass, but every time you're staring at an empty glass. So if you've ever finished your Coke Zero before the first fry hits the table, you're among friends. It happens. Occupational hazard with Coke Zero. Yeah, Real Coca Cola taste. Zero sugar. Too good to wait. Enjoy an ice cold Coca Cola Zero Sugar today.

[Danny McBride]

Hi, my name is Danny McBride and I feel thrilling about being Conan O' Brien's friend.

[Conan O'Brien]

Wait, it's thrilling? You feel thrilling? Not thrilled to be so cool? The way you said it has nothing to do with me.

[Matt Gourley]

It sounds to me like plausible deniability about.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes,

[Sona Mifzesian]

Back to school, ring the bell, brand new shoes, walking loose climb the fence, books and pens. I can tell that we are going to be friends. Yes, I can tell that we are going to be friends.

[Conan O'Brien]

Hey there. Welcome to Conan o' Brien Needs a Friend. It's not just me that does this podcast. I am the beneficiary of having very strong, powerful, independent voices. Joining me one of those is Sona Mifzesian. Hello, Sona.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Welcome. Hello.

[Conan O'Brien]

And how can I welcome you when you already are welcome? And you are an integral part of this whole. Matt Gourli. Good to see you as well. And I thank you for your service. No one gets there alone. So here we are together on Conan o' Brien Needs a Friend. And I am.

[Trevor Noah]

What?

[Sona Mifzesian]

Sorry, who are you?

[Conan O'Brien]

My name is Conan o'. Brien.

[Sona Mifzesian]

No, you're not.

[Conan O'Brien]

And I'm someone who's just filled with gratitude. Glad to be here.

[Matt Gourley]

Have you been body snatched?

[Conan O'Brien]

I was body snatched. I was very tired last night and I fell asleep next to a strange new plant I found.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Oh, no.

[Conan O'Brien]

When I woke up this morning, there was a decayed, beady eyed carcass next to me.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And then my body felt refreshed.

[Matt Gourley]

And I like this, whatever it is.

[Danny McBride]

I do too.

[Sona Mifzesian]

If you ever got body snatched, I feel like we'd all know, like, right away.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And it would just be you being nice to us.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Or not doing bits, just being normal.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's right. That's how you would know. I would just be, hello, Sona, how are you? And how are. How's your family?

[Matt Gourley]

I'd be interested in the answer and you would wait for a response.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, it'd be funny the minute I. If there were body snatchers out there. If I came in and all I would have to do is say, hi, Sona, how are you? And you would shoot me in the head with a shotgun. Yes.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yes, I would.

[Conan O'Brien]

And you'd be right.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yes, I would. 100%. I would know immediately.

[Conan O'Brien]

I remember there was an episode of the Simpsons back in my time where I think it was one of the Halloween episodes. There's zombies that are taking over Springfield and Homer's shooting zombies left and right. And then Flanders pops up in a window and Homer shoots his head off. And someone says, how did you know that he was a zombie? And he went, he was a zombie. I just always loved that joke that he blew Flanders head off. Not even thinking about him being a zombie or not. You shot zombie Flanders. Flanders was a zombie. Anyway. No, I'm. I just wanted to give credit where credit's due. And I think, this is a village.

[Matt Gourley]

We do it together.

[Sona Mifzesian]

I know, it's really unsettling.

[Matt Gourley]

What have you done with.

[Conan O'Brien]

I want to talk about something which is I always have ink on my hands. I don't know if that comes up on the podcast, but I don't think it has. I write a lot with pens and I'm constantly doodling and I always have a pen in my hand and I'm constantly writing notes in a journal or on a scrap of paper. And lately I've been using this fountain pen that Jeff Ross got me for my birthday, which is really nice, and I use it all the time, but it does bleed a little bit of ink and I'm constantly.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Does it squirt?

[Conan O'Brien]

What's that?

[Sona Mifzesian]

Does it squirt?

[Conan O'Brien]

What are you doing?

[Matt Gourley]

Novelty.

[Sona Mifzesian]

No, I'm not. I'm not doing anything.

[Conan O'Brien]

It. No, no. It's just that when you're working around bottles of ink and stuff like that, and I kind of like it all

[Matt Gourley]

my life it's like an actual fountain pen.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Like there's liquor.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's really nice. And I'm not. This is not an ad.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

It's.

[Conan O'Brien]

I think it's an Aurora. It's an Aurora. It's really nice. It's a good pen. And he got it for me and I really like it. And thanks again, Jeff.

[Matt Gourley]

And let me try that.

[Conan O'Brien]

I use it all the time, but look at my hands. And I noticed when we were in. We were just shooting a travel show, Sona. And you were with me or in all of my different travels. I'm always about to go on camera and I see that there's ink over my right hand everywhere, and I just look like a little sight.

[Matt Gourley]

First of all, feel how warm this is. What have you been doing with this pen?

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I keep it in a safe place.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Why is it leaking so much?

[Conan O'Brien]

It's not diss. The Aurora pen. It's just that sometimes. No, no, no, you gotta. God, you're not. Just look.

[Sona Mifzesian]

See, I'm writing with the pen incorrectly. No, see, whatever you're doing, you went like this.

[Conan O'Brien]

And with a fountain pen, you need to come at it with an angle. You were coming at it straight down. And that's just stupid.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I was writing, huh? Yeah, Well, I know he's. I think he's.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I always hold it and I flip it around in my hand. Oh, okay. And I always do that with pens.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Why are pens like that better than normal pens?

[Danny McBride]

I'm not.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, they're beautiful looking.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yeah, they are.

[Conan O'Brien]

And it's just kind of nice. I've always been a little bit. Even when I was a kid, I told you I loved pens, paper. I wanted office supplies.

[Trevor Noah]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

I mean, what a freaky kid. I wasn't asking for a baseball glove. I wanted a little stamp that said void stationary. I wanted ledgers. I wanted ledgers. I wanted. Did you get them?

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

My parents were very nice to me. They would indulge me. But I remember thinking, all I want to do is be able to sign. Sign forms and then stamp them and then put them in a pneumatic tube like in the 1920s and.

[Matt Gourley]

Or Home Depot in the 90s.

[Conan O'Brien]

Exactly. So I just. I was always into that. But anyway, I'm just getting a little self conscious now that, you know, I go to these nice events or events where I'm supposed to be on camera and I Sometimes I look at the picture later on and there's just. It looks like I've crawled out of a grave.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, yeah.

[Sona Mifzesian]

I think you're doing it wrong.

[Conan O'Brien]

What?

[Sona Mifzesian]

I think you're just writing incorrectly.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know what you need is this from the person who. I'm not going to talk about the.

[Sona Mifzesian]

I'm just saying.

[Conan O'Brien]

With which you attack the page.

[Sona Mifzesian]

There's no ink on my finger, but there. There is.

[Matt Gourley]

You need some of that powder that, like, Shakespeare would throw on it after they write. You know, that. That soaks it up.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, Yeah. I think it was just sand back in the day.

[Matt Gourley]

I don't know.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Do you have a quill?

[Conan O'Brien]

I don't have a quill. I've never had a quill.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Okay, but you, like, you're a quill guy. I feel like you're very quill.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

You're real.

[Conan O'Brien]

You've seen my blotters over. I would just fill them with what little.

[Sona Mifzesian]

So many doodles. We kept them all. They were on your desk. Yeah, we have them. And then when they would fill up, I would replace them, and then you

[Conan O'Brien]

would just doodle away, blanket them. And you could probably tell my mood if you looked at like, oh, well, here's a do. Here's a. Here's a blotter from 1997. You could probably tell what was going on in my life.

[Matt Gourley]

Well, even right now, in your journal, you've written in some kind of hieroglyphics.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, I write.

[Matt Gourley]

Is that me?

[Conan O'Brien]

No. I just try and create little languages, and I like making lines. But anyway, that's what I got, is that I'm covered in ink all the time now, and I need to. I need to. I need to clean up my shit a little bit here.

[Danny McBride]

Yes, go ahead.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

I've completely stopped using pens and paper. I'm. I'm. I'm past that. I got a Kindle scribe.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yep.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

That I've started to doodle on, which is great.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. So are you trying to get a free one? Why would you bring this up?

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

No, I'm just saying I. If you need a solve, you can move into the digital age instead of

[Conan O'Brien]

going back to better for paper move forward.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

You can email yourself notes. It's great. I like the tactile.

[Conan O'Brien]

No offense, but I like the tactile nature.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

This is tactile.

[Conan O'Brien]

Listen, I'm very suspicious, Blay, and for good reason that you mentioned. It's a Kindle scribe.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Because we can take that out.

[Conan O'Brien]

Because. No, no, we don't have to take that. We're gonna leave it in because based on your past behavior, I think you're gonna try and write that off now. I think you are. No, no, I was gone for that.

[Matt Gourley]

And Blay, we gotta talk, man.

[Sona Mifzesian]

You know what if we brought that up again?

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

No, no, no.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know what? You're guilty of the same thing.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Pause.

[Matt Gourley]

We're gonna continue this in the seg. Will be actually part four of Blay's

[Conan O'Brien]

tax saga, tax evasion scandal. And by the way, Blay is guilty of the same thing that put Capone in prison.

[Matt Gourley]

Okay, take us to the intro.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay. My guest today as a hilarious writer, producer, and actor behind such shows as Eastbound and Down, Vice Principals, and the Righteous Gemstones. He now has a new book titled Thrilling Tales of Modern Men. Very excited. He's back on the podcast. Danny mcbride. Welcome, Danny. As you know, I'm a massive fan of yours. Have been since day one.

[Danny McBride]

Well, the feeling is mutual, and I'm

[Conan O'Brien]

just thrilled that you're here. And we have a lot of stuff to talk about, and we'll talk more in depth about it in a little bit. But you wrote a book of short stories called Thrilling Tales of Modern Men. And you write so well, and the stories are great, and I'm very proud of you. And also jealous. Cause I like to write. I haven't gotten my shit together to do something like this. And this is fantastic. And then the thing I'm most jealous of is the first quote. You know, you get known people to write a nice quote on the back. Yours is from Sturgill Simpson. And I love Sturgill Simpson.

[Danny McBride]

Oh, he's the best.

[Conan O'Brien]

And so much so that I have a band on the side, and I play Sturgill Simpson. And I've said to people, I'd like to get to know Sturgill Simpson. And people said, he was on your show. And I'm like, I know, but it's not the same. Like, I wish Sturgill Simpson was my friend. He's such a good writer, such a good singer.

[Danny McBride]

That happened. I could negotiate that meeting. I'm sure I could. Yep.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's going to end up with me. A suitcase of cash in a parking lot late at night.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Where the deal goes down.

[Danny McBride]

We'll meet you around the world somewhere. One of your destinations for your show.

[Conan O'Brien]

I would love to hang with both of you at the same time. But this book, we will talk about it, but I want to start on some other stuff first, which is, who the fuck do you think you are?

[Danny McBride]

Let me tell you.

[Conan O'Brien]

Let me tell you something. I don't like you. And I don't like your comedy. I don't like your Southern ways. I'm from Boston.

[Matt Gourley]

See?

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, I was thinking about you, reading up about you, and one of the things that we really have in common was how important Saturday morning cartoons were to us and sort of our comedic outlook. You were watching. First of all, you took it really seriously. I remember my brothers and I did, too. We would study the Saturday morning lineup. Cause it would refresh. It was a big thing back in the day. Now, I think new shows come and go all the time. But if you're like me, I'm older than you. But I remembered in the summer, you'd start reading about the shows that were gonna come out in the fall, what the schedule and the lineup was gonna be. You'd circle the ones that were interesting to you in the TV Guide. They'd be, you know, you'd talk about it, and then you. We were there. Saturday morning, I would, like, get up and have coffee.

[Danny McBride]

Oh, me. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And that was like five pounding it to get through coffee and a couple of cigarettes.

[Danny McBride]

I gotta make it to Smurfs.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. And then I would watch these shows with real interest, you know. So you were watching. Probably the thing that influenced me the most was not a new show. It was Warner Brothers cartoons. You know, the Looney Tunes characters, they influenced my comedy, timing, everything. And you were into Daffy Duck.

[Danny McBride]

I was into Donald Duck.

[Conan O'Brien]

Donald Duck, Yeah.

[Danny McBride]

I like.

[Conan O'Brien]

I don't respect that.

[Danny McBride]

I like how. I like how angry he was. He was always so pissed off. And it was just such a funny. So funny against someone like Mickey, who just literally never loses his temper.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay.

[Danny McBride]

And then he's just buddies with the angriest guy who's ever existed.

[Conan O'Brien]

All right, well, I got that wrong. So now we're talking about.

[Danny McBride]

Donald Duck is very cool, too.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

I love.

[Conan O'Brien]

I love Donald Duck because. I mean, Daffy Duck because he's. He really is disturbingly insane.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, he is. He can pull his beak off and put it around the back of his head sometimes.

[Conan O'Brien]

But, I mean, just. Just. He needs to be medicated. He needs to go to McLean Hospital in Massachusetts. And we're all laughing, but it's like, no, no, no, no.

[Trevor Noah]

He's.

[Conan O'Brien]

We know what this is now.

[Matt Gourley]

If he was on TV now, he would get the care that he needs.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Yes.

[Conan O'Brien]

So you like Donald Duck? Donald Duck is so pissed.

[Danny McBride]

Oh, so pissed.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Danny McBride]

And everything. The whole universe is always on him all the time. Yes. Like, honestly, he just has this little blue shirt on. Just walking around, pissed off.

[Conan O'Brien]

That awful blue shirt. And no pants.

[Danny McBride]

And no pants. No pants.

[Conan O'Brien]

Maybe I think that's why he's pissed.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, it probably is.

[Conan O'Brien]

Walk around with no pants for a while and you'll just be an angry guy. Bus seats.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Hot.

[Conan O'Brien]

Not that hot. It is when you have no pants. So you watch that and you watched my.

[Danny McBride]

My lineup was the Dungeon Dragons cartoon show. That was awesome. Yeah. I mean, I'm trying to think of what else came in the. The Littles.

[Trevor Noah]

Do you.

[Danny McBride]

I don't know if you're.

[Matt Gourley]

I think you and I might be born.

[Danny McBride]

I was born in 76.

[Matt Gourley]

73. So, yeah, the Little Snore.

[Danny McBride]

You were a little too old to be watching the Little Snore. Let's be honest. No, I was almost aging.

[Conan O'Brien]

I was a late bloomer, and what

[Matt Gourley]

I bloomed into was disturbing.

[Conan O'Brien]

I just have to admit, I was watching Saved by the Bell when I was 45.

[Danny McBride]

Those kids were.

[Conan O'Brien]

Those girls are pretty. Dude, you're 45. You're here in a. You're here in an electronics store watching Saved by the Bell on nine televisions. You've been here every morning.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah. The Littles were awesome, though.

[Conan O'Brien]

What are the Littles? I don't even know what that is.

[Danny McBride]

Their. Their theme song was literally we are the Littles. They just said their name, and they were just tiny people that lived in someone else's house.

[Matt Gourley]

Normal people.

[Danny McBride]

Normal people.

[Matt Gourley]

Size people's house.

[Danny McBride]

But they would, like, make their be and stuff out of, like, matchboxes, and they would, like, design things like that, you know, were full size, but they would use it to their own advantage.

[Matt Gourley]

Cutesy, animated. They kind of all look like elves almost.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, somebody should. Somebody should remake that. And then you mentioned shirt tales. I remember that. That was such a strange concept for a show which was just animals who. Their shirts said stuff. Right? That was. Wait, what that was.

[Conan O'Brien]

That was animals that wear clothing, wear shirts. There were shirts and their shirts say things.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah. I think they change depending on their emotions and stuff, right?

[Matt Gourley]

I think believe so.

[Conan O'Brien]

So the shirts are like a mood ring, but they have words on them.

[Danny McBride]

And they might not have worn pants. They might have been. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, there we go.

[Danny McBride]

And see again, the. The trend of no pants.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, just shirts. You know what? I walked through them all wearing a shirt that said, hug me with no pants. Not one person hugged me. You're busy watching Surprise. Yeah, I guess the security guard. It's kind of a hug when they pull you to the ground.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, that counts.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

That counts.

[Sona Mifzesian]

That's what they were doing.

[Conan O'Brien]

So you're growing up. That's important to you. You're raised Baptist.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah. Yep.

[Conan O'Brien]

And your mom used to perform at the church. She would write out, like, skits and do the scripts and make puppets and she would do a little show. That must have influenced you.

[Danny McBride]

It definitely did, yeah. I mean, I remember I was, like, surprised when she even took it on. Like, you know, we just went to church. Then suddenly my mom is stepping up into this position where she's going to do puppet shows in front of the whole ch.

[Matt Gourley]

Church.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right.

[Danny McBride]

I was like, how are you gonna do this, Mom? You do, you know about puppets? You know how to do puppet stuff? She does. But, yeah, they would. She would kind of like drum up these, like, two to three page little scripts and then she would. It would. It was her. It was my dad sometimes, and then it would be other people from the church playing some of the other characters. And it was just like the children's sermon before the big sermon. They would, you know, so it'd be something, you know, thou shalt not steal or whatever. And it's just a little skit about a kid who steals, like, lunch money at school and why you shouldn't do it.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right.

[Danny McBride]

But was, you know, I think what was cool about it was the idea of being able to see something, create it, and then like, a few days later, performed in front of people. And then, you know, my. From my point of view, I'm not doing the puppets. I'm not. I don't have anything. I don't have anything to do with it. I'm just sitting there watching the process. Like, I'm seeing her in our kitchen writing these scripts and, like, you know, running the lines. And then a few days later, I'm at church, like, looking around, watching people watch it and respond to it. And, you know, I just thought it was cool. I think that was like, the beginning of me sort of like, even understanding, like, oh, this is like something you could do. You can. You can write things in your kitchen and people might respond to it.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. That's so cool. You. Were you quite religious then when you were a kid, when you were Baptist?

[Danny McBride]

I wouldn't say I was religious. I think I spent most of my time, like, you know, doodling on the minister's face in the program or. Or just imagining what I think we

[Conan O'Brien]

went to the sea. I think I'm. Whatever religion you are, I'm that religion. Yeah.

[Danny McBride]

But it's funny because now that, you know, we. I stopped going probably in middle school, but we went all the time. But then you look back like, oh, it's actually Kind of awesome that for like an hour you had to just be forced to sit there and be quiet.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yeah.

[Danny McBride]

While. You know, I think my imagination would run wild during that time, too.

[Conan O'Brien]

I was Catholic, so I went to Catholic mass, but you guys had to

[Danny McBride]

stand up and sit down a lot

[Conan O'Brien]

more than stand up and sit down.

[Danny McBride]

We could just be lazy. We can just sit there every now and then, clap along to a song.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, we had to stand up and sit down a lot. But there's still a lot of time to look around. I would just look around St. Lawrence's Church and, like, I would look up and just imagine all kinds of insane things. Because you're not allowed. You weren't on a tablet. They didn't have tablets then. And you just. You had to. You were trapped with your mind. And I wasn't thinking about the stuff I was supposed to be thinking about. You said that you're. You have said that you. Your parents got divorced, and that also probably had an effect on whatever. You questioning this whole Baptist thing?

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, I just saw it as, you know, I don't think it's. It was exclusive to, like, the. The Baptist church, but it was at that time in the 80s, it was sort of like, you know, people weren't getting divorced as much, and especially at the church, I think. So it was just we. After it kind of happened, I felt like my mom didn't really feel, like, welcome there as much. And so then she would drop me and my sister off and we're like, well, we're only going because you were going. We ain't trying to go to this thing by ourselves.

[Conan O'Brien]

You walk in, you peek the cars left, and then you guys go out the back door.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah. And, you know, the cool thing about that church I went to is called Salem Baptist Church, was in Spotsylvania, Virginia, but it was actually a church that was around during the Civil War. So it was just kind of wild to go to some little church that was like, oh, this was like, standing.

[Conan O'Brien]

Was it the same Spotsylvania?

[Danny McBride]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

As the battle?

[Danny McBride]

Yeah. Yep. Same one. Yeah. A lot of. Lot of Civil War action in my hometown.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, lots.

[Danny McBride]

Those are.

[Conan O'Brien]

Those are. Those are nasty battles, too.

[Danny McBride]

That's where that area, too, had some of the nastiest battles. Like, I think it is. It's known as the bloodiest ground in all of North America because of how many battles were there. But the gnarliest one, I think, is that Battle of Wilderness that was there, and that's like this insane battle that happened over the course of a few days in the forest. The forest was on fire and guys were literally just like hatcheting each other. I mean, it was like, it was awful. It was insane. And, yeah, it's killer. I used to go there all the time and just enjoy myself. Watch. Think about that. That brutality.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Good times.

[Danny McBride]

Oh, great memories.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's a good. That's a good first date. I've talked about this on the podcast, but I'm a, you know, history buff and a Civil War guy, and I remembered what my wife and I, it's. People think it was our honeymoon. It was not. It was after we got married, but just shortly after, like a couple of months later, I had a week off from the late night trip.

[Sona Mifzesian]

That's a honeymoon, isn't that?

[Conan O'Brien]

No, we had our honeymoon and then we came back from it. But then maybe two months later, I had a week off and she said, let's take a trip. And I said, yeah, let's drive down through Georgia and visit the different towns in Georgia. And, you know, she liked it. And then the next thing you know, I'm saying, she said, where are we going to now? And I said, andersonville. And she said, what's that? And I said, said, that's the giant prisoner of war camp where the Confederates kept all the Union troops, didn't feed them, and they all died of diarrhea. And she said, we're going to Atlanta to the Four Seasons Hotel and we're going to drink appletinis and get our diarrhea there. So we did that instead.

[Danny McBride]

But I think you had a great idea.

[Conan O'Brien]

I think I had a great idea. Think of all looking at a field. Think of all the diarrhea. Peyronie's disease, also known as pd, is a condition that isn't talked about often, but it's more common than many men realize. Some men may even feel embarrassed or reluctant to bring it up. PD may involve a buildup of scar tissue that forms under the skin of the penis, which can cause a noticeable curve with a bump during an erection. That curve can lead to pain during intimacy. It also may affect a man's confidence and mental health. It also can lead to frustration, depression, lowered self esteem, and even withdrawal from sexual activity and physical intimacy. If you notice a curve with a bump down there, it might be pd. The good news is it's treatable. A urology specialist can diagnose Peyronie's disease and talk through treatment options. To learn more, visit talkaboutpd.com hey, one thing about Summer sona is that everything just feels easy.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Sure does.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's the season for comfortable go anywhere pieces that make getting dressed simple. That's what makes Quince such a great fit for the season. They focus on well made essentials that you'll actually live in all summer long. Quince's 100% European linen pants and shirts are breathable. They're easy to throw on and the summer upgrades your rotation needs. Their tees are soft enough to live in all days. Those are soft tees. I felt them.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Blay, you wear a lot of quints and you're liking it.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Yeah, I love it. I just got the 100% European linen relaxed short sleeve shirt and it's great. It's airy, especially for the hot Los Angeles summers.

[Conan O'Brien]

Also, you seem more relaxed these days. Usually you're real uptight and kind of shouting into the mic. You seem a little more balanced now.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

It's great. Also like, I like the French blue because I think it sets off my

[Conan O'Brien]

white hair very nicely. Yeah, it's a nice. I think it's more quints that's providing the goodness skin.

[Sona Mifzesian]

It looks good on his skin. And it's back to the ad. Okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

Make your summer wardrobe easier. Go to quint.comconan for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in can canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.comconan for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.comconan. This is a paid ad by BetterHelp. All of us learn about stigmas when we're a kid. Things we're probably not supposed to talk about. Things we're not supposed to share. Maybe be a little ashamed of. Even in 2026, stigma can get in the way of a lot of things, like getting support for your mental health. Unbelievably, that's still an issue for people. Yes, maybe you've encouraged friends to consider therapy while avoiding taking the first step yourself because you're busy or you're worried what others would think, or you're telling yourself you can handle it alone. Yeah, this is a situation where you can't do it alone. You need to talk to someone else. But therapy with BetterHelp, the world's largest online therapy platform, can be a space to slow down and talk through what's been building before it feels unmanageable. Here's how it works. You just take a short questionnaire to identify your needs and preferences. And BetterHelp will handle the initial therapist matching work for you, that's huge. Their industry leading match rate means BetterHelp typically gets it right the first time. You can feel confident knowing betterhelp therapists work according to a strict code of conduct. We have never had that here at the show and unlike us, they are fully qualified. Don't let hesitation hold you back. Find support with better help. Sign up and get 10% [e-mail] Conan that's betterhelp.com Conan. I do think one of the things that made the righteous gemstones just so great was you knew your subject, you understood these, these people. And also I always sense there's affection there too. Like, I don't think it works to make a comedy about people if you just think they're stupid and loathsome.

[Danny McBride]

Totally.

[Conan O'Brien]

And that's not what you did. You had a real understanding and affection for these people and found them ridiculous, but also understood them at the same time. Does that make sense?

[Danny McBride]

It does make sense. And I think we were, that is what we were trying to do. And I think we extend it to a lot of the stuff from even eastbound to vice principals. It's sort of. We know that we're not dealing with the best examples of mankind, but I think that it's fun to treat them still with a little bit of empathy and even giving them enough depth so there's layers there. I think when comedy is written where there is such a disdain for what you're joking about, it could kind of become boring. I think it becomes more unexpected if you're confused as the audience of where you even kind of sit with this person.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, I think, I mean, I talk about this now. I do think it's very tricky. You always have to have a blend in comedy. If you're just thinking about the comedy. And obviously we're very divided right now in this country and people are yelling at each other a lot and it's very vitriolic. And I think sometimes that, I don't know, it just makes comedy. If you want to talk about it or portray it in any way, the only way to do it is to show some nuance and empathy for a different point of view. But that's not what a lot of people are interested in. Yeah, that makes sense.

[Danny McBride]

It totally makes sense. Then the thing is, when everyone is kind of like on both sides are angry about the same exact stuff, it also just makes any comment you're making sort of feel redundant like people. It's like well traveled paths, you know. So I do think when you can find that nuance, you. You probably have a better shot of actually, like making people think if it's not something that they've been shouted out about over and over again.

[Conan O'Brien]

The. What's interesting. Another thing that's interesting to me is that you came to be known through comedy and hugely successful in comedy, but you've also carved out time to do these other things. You were a huge force behind the Halloween franchise, the reboots. And it's so fascinating to me because I've always thought there's a weird. Like sometimes they. People say, or I've said, many people have said it, there's a symbiosis between comedy and music. Like, a lot of comedians also love music and there's some kind of weird parallel. I also think there's something going on between comedy and horror. There's some. They're very different, but also there are things about them that aren't that different because it's all about surprise.

[Danny McBride]

Exactly. I think you're. You're with both of them. You're structuring an experience, you know, with a joke. You obviously want to pace things out so that the punchline gets the biggest laugh. And I think it's the same way with those scares. You think about how we'll make them a little scared here and then we'll let them off the hook here, and then, boom, we'll hit them here. So I think there is a little bit of that is similar, is the architecture of trying to make sure you get the result that you're going for.

[Conan O'Brien]

Also, I mean, if you look at Jordan Peeler, his work, if you look at obsession, if you look at weapons, a lot of these people got their chops in comedy. And then when I was watching Weapons last year, and one of the reasons that I really wanted to do something with it on the Oscars was that character of Aunt Gladys is to me, a comedy character. And there's so much to the movie that's kind of funny at the same time. And it's that weird, that's that razor thin line between this is hilarious and this is horrifying. And many times when I've been trying to be funny in my career, I've been horrifying, but. And if I tried to, you know, frighten any guy, I think they would just start laughing. So. But there's something going on there. And so it must have been a great creative outlet for you. Clearly, it was.

[Danny McBride]

It was a lot of fun. You know, that was. Jason Blum had come to David Green about adapting that. And, you know, David Green and I have gone to college. We went to college together. We've known each other for a really, really long time. And, you know, he came to me and was like, I think I might do this. Would you want to help me? I'm like, no way. You shouldn't relaunch Halloween. It's a terrible idea. I love Halloween. Don't do that.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Yeah.

[Danny McBride]

But then as we were thinking about, it was like, well, I mean, if someone's going to, why don't we give it a shot and let's see if we could. And, yeah, it was honestly, was, like, unreal. It was so funny to be sitting there, like, writing on that script, and you're just writing. You know, the shape walks into the room, you know, you're gonna.

[Matt Gourley]

I was formed in that movie. My babysitter made me watch it when I was five with the lights out. And so to, like, do away with all those sequels that, in their own way, I love. But to come back the way you guys did with the 2018 one, oh, man, it was, like, closure for me. Thank you.

[Danny McBride]

The whole experience was awesome. Not only getting to do that, but even we had to go through steps of approval to do it. David and I had to go to John Carpenter's house and pitch him what we wanted to do. And it was sort of like, I've never really been nervous about pitching an idea ever. It's just like, they don't like it. They don't like it. But suddenly, as we're knocking on his door, it's like, oh, God, I think I'll be crushed if he doesn't like what this idea is. Listen. Is insane. And so we, you know, I'm meeting him and pitching him this idea of, like, we. We have an idea of what we want to do with something you've made. It was all of a sudden, like, what the balls of us? What are we thinking?

[Conan O'Brien]

We should never have this.

[Trevor Noah]

Great.

[Danny McBride]

It was awesome. And then, you know, we. Once we got his approval, we sent it to. To Jamie Lee Curtis to. Because obviously it wouldn't work without her in it. And, yeah, when she called back and was like, yeah, I want to do this. I mean, Green and I are just looking at each other like, what is going on? I mean, it was. It was insane. And when it premiered at tiff, I think it might have been the most proud I've ever been of anything that we've done. I mean, I was so nervous of what that reception was going to be for that one Because I'm there with them. I'm a fan of this. It meant a lot, and I just really wanted it to work for the other fans. And I remember watching that, and just my stomach was in knots. I wasn't eating for, like, two days leading up to it. And we're sitting there, and when it got to the last half where they're, like, in the house with a. And everybody in the theater's, like, cheering and applauding, I was just like, oh, God, yes.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes, I'm gonna live.

[Danny McBride]

It was. It was awesome. It was so much fun.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

I also think writing how someone gets killed would be kind of fascinating because there is a real art to it. You know, just if. If the character just gets killed, well, that's, you know, gets shot. It's boring. It's trying to think of these inventive ways that are sometimes 50% comedy. The way someone. You know, and you watch these movies as they're competing with each other to do it in a more interesting way.

[Matt Gourley]

That's the scene at the rest stop when Michael Myers comes in and just drops teeth on the ground from. It's harrowing.

[Danny McBride]

Well, yeah, I think that idea about the teeth dropping, it might have Even. I. I might be remembering it wrong, but I feel like it was our location, our buddy who works in locations who had that idea. And so that's. The other thing is you're working on a. You know, if you're on a comedy, sometimes you'll get jokes from people sitting around like, oh, you should say this. Like, oh, it's not bad. When people suggest things like, he should drop the teeth, you're like, great idea. But also, keep an eye on this dude that is up.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Where'd you come up with that idea? Sometimes, I don't know. I don't want to talk about. I mean, I want to take the credit, but. Yeah, that's fantastic. Yeah. It just occurred to me that it would be. I don't know, it'd be really funny to shoot a short thing where it's you going to John Carpenter's house to pitch him, and he doesn't really like the idea, but you hang around, and then you use all the tropes from horror movies. Like, he goes into the kitchen at night and opens the refrigerator door, and then when he shuts it, you're right there and you're like, I just really think if I told you I don't want to do it.

[Sona Mifzesian]

The pitch.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, it's just. It's called the pitch. He's In a season of the Pitch. Yeah, Season of the Pitch. And you just keep.

[Danny McBride]

I don't let it go.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, you don't let it go.

[Danny McBride]

I become his dog after the thing.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, it's all the. Exactly. It's all the. This stuff that has been used a million times. I'm always amazed now when people use some of those tropes that have been used way too many times and they don't put a spin on it.

[Matt Gourley]

Like, really, that's where we're talking about Widow's Bay.

[Unidentified Dell Ad Speaker]

There's a.

[Matt Gourley]

There's a slasher episode and a moment with a shotgun that you wish you'd seen in slasher movies for decades, and you finally see it, and it's wonderful.

[Conan O'Brien]

Widow's Bay is there.

[Danny McBride]

I mean, I can't wait to see it. Everyone I know loves it. And here's what it is on my list.

[Conan O'Brien]

Here's what I. They're doing something new on that show, which is. It's not a comedy. It's horror and there's comedy, but they've got this ratio. It's like they invented this cocktail that's kind of perfect. And I don't think anyone's done quite that yet. That's great. And they do. I think one of the real brilliant things about the show is they'll get the tension up to this highest pitch, and then they'll always deflate it in this kind of humiliating way, but then get the pitch right back again and without giving anything away. But there's just one point where there's like a demon. And the main character, Matthew Reese, has gone in to talk to the demon, and this other woman says, you gotta go in there and talk to the demon. So he goes in and he's starting to talk to the demon, and it's like knife's edge tense. And then the door just opens and she goes, I forgot my purse. And the demon and Matthew Rhys. Wait a second. While she gets her purse and she backs out, and you're like, who the fuck does that? Who does that?

[Matt Gourley]

It's great.

[Conan O'Brien]

Anyway, I don't know why we're plugging this show that neither one of us is involved in, but Widow's Bay, you're a genius killer. I just have to give a shout out. Katie Dippold is the mind behind Widow's Bay. I think she's brilliant, and she's a former intern on our show, and she's brilliant. She's done a ton of other work, but I think Widow's Bay is her masterpiece. And also While we're talking about other people's work, I think Hyundai makes an incredible audience.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Oh, boy.

[Danny McBride]

They've come a long way.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Oh, boy.

[Conan O'Brien]

Let's talk about this book because. Thrilling Tales of Modern men. I know that this is a theme you've worked on for a while in your work over the years, which is men kind of trying to confront maybe a world that's passed them by, or men who feel. Well, you're going to describe it better than I am.

[Danny McBride]

No, no, you keep going. I want to hear how you describe it. No, you're totally right.

[Conan O'Brien]

Men like me, who are masculine and never lose. I'm gonna do. Oh, actually, I can read from a New York Times review.

[Danny McBride]

Oh, okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

This is shit. It says. No, I'm Elementary. It's a very interesting.

[Danny McBride]

Oh, I haven't read that one yet. No, no.

[Conan O'Brien]

This is the New York Times. What a piece of shit. Shitty, shitty, shitty shit. What the hell?

[Danny McBride]

My mom wrote that.

[Conan O'Brien]

I thought this was in my toilet, but it was. No, it's a book. No New York Times review. Some of the stories fit neatly into the canon of wounded protagonists who lash out. Others tip toward a quieter emotional depth, albeit laced with obscenity and the occasional violent outburst. They're all undeniably the work of a storyteller interested in entertaining while also poking at what makes men tick and then go boom. Which is.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, I'd buy that book.

[Conan O'Brien]

You'd write that book. I don't have to because. I don't have to because you gave me one for free.

[Danny McBride]

Not for free. I need the Venmo.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's coming. It's coming because I'm real good with tech, but this comes out of, like, you're so good. And I'm going back to even your first work Foot fist way. And through everything you've done at. And also Donald Duck, people who are assertive male characters that are also pissed off and frustrated because things aren't working out. And that seems to be this area that you love exploring. And now you've got this really terrific book of short stories that tackles that.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, it's just, you know, it's an extension. I feel like. Like what you were saying about the. The work I've done in tv. Like, this kind of came to me because I really just wanted to see, could I do that and deliver that same experience, that same vibe, the same level of storytelling. Could I do it in. In a totally different format? And that was kind of why I entered this. And, you know, even the way the stories are sort of Structured, like, they start, in essence, with, like, a cold open. And the title of the story, like, comes up later in the story. And so it was kind of a way of me sort of trying to translate what I. I mean, I've written at this point, like, over 80 episodes of TV. And so it trains your brain to work in a certain way when it comes to storytelling. And I was just trying to use some of the stuff I learned doing that to just put it into a totally new endeavor.

[Conan O'Brien]

Also, it feels too like, if you're writing episodic television, as you have brilliantly over the years, you've got these characters you want to get multiple seasons, and you set up your own rules, and you set up who your protagonists are and your side characters, and then that's what you've got to work with over and over and over and over again. And with a project like this, you can have an idea, explore it in a short story, and then pivot, say, okay, I'm done with that. Now it's gonna be about a robot. Now it's gonna be about a magician who's suspended in a box in a mall and gets in over his head. Now it's gonna be about a sitcom actor who takes revenge on the coyote that killed his pet.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Like,

[Conan O'Brien]

you're working in a shorter form, but you can go nuts, which is great.

[Danny McBride]

You can go nuts. And gemstones. I was writing on that for seven years, basically, and it was so much fun. And it was fun writing for all those characters. And that world that we established was a ton of fun. And it's weird when you've worked that long on something, once it's over, it is almost like a breakup. It's like getting over a relationship or something that. I wanted to write more, but I felt like I ain't trying to get into anything too serious. I just need. I need to get in and out. I just need some short stories, you know, I felt like I couldn't, like, commit myself to telling a story that was going to take that much time, you know? And so the idea was like, I think there's just a lot of stories I want to tell. And this allowed that to happen where you didn't have to think of the story of like, well, will this have legs for four years? Will this. You know, when you tell this one episode, it has to connect to six other episodes that tell a story. It's like you could enter it it, start it, and take it to completion in one sitting. And, yeah, it was a lot of fun. And I think after writing so much tv, it was. Yeah, it was just sort of a cleanse that I needed.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, now is this. What is your process? I know it sounds like a boring question, but to me, it's fascinating. Do you write these stories here and there? Did you sit down to write a collection of short stories?

[Danny McBride]

You know, I started. I think there's only, like, maybe one or two of them that are from this. But how I even began even writing in this format was when we were writing vice principals. It was. We. We wrote both of those seasons in one year. So it was one solid year of just working on that morning, noon, and night. And it was. I was about. I think about five months in, I was feeling that thing of like, oh, I love these guys, but fuck, I have to do more with these guys.

[Conan O'Brien]

You're locked in a room mentally, with

[Danny McBride]

these few characters, and you're just trying. It becomes a puzzle, figuring it all out, and. And I was just sort of like, the idea of anything else felt appealing. So I just started this thing where in the morning, before I'd go into the writer's room, I would just freehand write, like, anything I wanted. And I would just get to about three or four pages, and I would stop it. And I had no ambitions for what any of it would be. It didn't have to be anything. I didn't have to continue the same story, just whatever idea I wanted to. I would just let myself write that. And I did that for the rest of that year. I ended up filling up, like, four books full of just all this stuff. And I put it away and didn't go back to any of it. And it really did kind of help my brain as I was writing by sprints, helped me exercise different ideas and get things out and kind of stay excited when I would go into the writer's room. And then I guess it was around 2020, I just, like, pulled those books out and looked at them for the first time. Like, was there anything in here that was, like, worth anything? And most of it sucked, but there were a few things that. That just kind of got my imagination going, or I was like, oh, it'd be kind of interesting if this thing continued or if I wrote more on this, I would do this with it. And so of the beginning of it, I pulled out of those books, probably about maybe like, 8 to 10 of the little kind of like, snippets of stories, and then started focusing on expanding those things. And then as I did that, I ended up getting rid of most of them. I Kept like one or two. And then I just kind of was like, I want to do this. I want to try to like create a, a book that I put this sort of level of thought into. And.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Danny McBride]

And then that just became, you know, I was kind of teaching myself how to do it. I thought the big difference between doing this and then writing a script is with the script there's always someone else really talented is going to come in to make it better. You know, whether it's like an actor's going to come in or the DP is going to make it look cool. And it was kind of interesting to have it where you're like, oh, I'm just writing this. And then I really need to go, I need to do all that stuff myself. I need to make sure that this is translated to people the way I'm imagining.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Ernest Hemingway didn't say, well, this is what I got. Punch it up.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, give it a little juice.

[Matt Gourley]

The font will be really, really nice.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's one. Let's focus on this one story, Institute of Men, because it's a fascinating idea. Do you want to talk about it a little bit?

[Danny McBride]

It's, it's a story about a guy who is getting self conscious about his. His hairline is receding, he's losing his hair and he's worried. A coworker of his thinks that he has Gollum esque features and that if he loses his hair it really could be bad for him, you know, so he, he starts to, he's like looking for a solution and he sees this ad for this place called the Institute of Men and he decides to sign up and then he goes to this place and it's a little unorthodox. There's some strange questions they ask him and it's a very odd procedure that he has to kind of sign away to and then it's one of those monkey paw situations. He gets hair, but there's a price that he has.

[Conan O'Brien]

But he also loved. There's little things in it that remind me of some of the sort of comedy slash horror things we've been talk about where you know, he has to fill out. You know, when you're getting going to get a medical procedure, you have to fill out a questionnaire and the questions are just really. Yeah, they're not things that you would normally see on a medical questionnaire.

[Danny McBride]

It should have been the first red flag. Yeah, they're, they're asking him things like how many friends he has and the last time he cried when Was the

[Conan O'Brien]

last time he cried?

[Danny McBride]

Yeah. When have you been in a fight?

[Conan O'Brien]

It's so funny because I've had. Had ideas over the years for little strange things that's like. It's not a comedy sketch. It's just a concept. It's kind of freaky, but I'd like to expand on it more and write it out. But, you know, I've never. I don't know. Never. I've never done it. It's. It's why. I mean, I've been a massive fan of yours. And then when you did this, I was like, well, this man. This man. This man did the thing that I have never been able to do.

[Danny McBride]

An idiot like me could do it. Conan.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's. That is not how I. That is how. That's not how I think about it. But it's. It's really exceptional. And. And also it has to just feel to have a book on the shelf. I mean, there's. There are a lot of celebrity, famous people toss off books and it's. That's not what this is. Do you know what I mean?

[Danny McBride]

Yeah. No. I worked as hard on this as I would on any of this, any of the shows I've worked on. I mean, I was like living and breathing it for the last year. And, you know, the craziest part about it is like, you. You finish it and then you turn in and then it's like the rewriting it where it's like, you know, you rewrite an episode of TV, it's 30 pages. Like, ah, I can get through this in a day or two. You get the notes and you look at it like, this is like a 400 page document. I gotta rewrite this. Where the hell do I even start? I don't even know if I could read this thing in a month, you know? But then you, you do. You get down into it where you do just start it. It just happens. I just. I went away and just left my computer on and just sort of like, would just pace back and forth, like, just approach it sentence at a time. Danny. Like, don't get intimidated by the. By the weight of it. And then it does start to strip away. You do start to, like. You're like Neo in the Matrix. You're like, get rid of that. Put that in. Change that. You can just start doing it.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, I've never had that.

[Danny McBride]

I'll show you.

[Conan O'Brien]

I've never been Neo in that. I'm Keanu in Point Break. That's who I am. So what is. Okay, this. What are you working on now? Because this. This project is done, and I hate to say. Okay, what else you got? You know, what have you done for me lately?

[Danny McBride]

I've been working on something I'm pretty excited about. You know, I. I approached Paramount last year about trying to relaunch GI Joe for them as a feature. Yeah. Talk about cartoons, dog. And so, yeah, the guys I write gemstones with, Jeff Riley and John Kachuri, we jammed. We. We've jammed out this script that Paramount's excited about, and we're going to try to. That's what we're trying to make next year.

[Conan O'Brien]

Wow.

[Matt Gourley]

You can't say anything, huh?

[Danny McBride]

I can't say. You know what? It's not a comedy. It's like a grounded action movie.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, my God.

[Danny McBride]

You know, in the comics, there's this town, Springfield, that is like, secretly. Cobra lives there.

[Matt Gourley]

I have that original comic.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, I loved it. And so our. Our story takes place there.

[Conan O'Brien]

And I realize that Matt's gonna follow you home.

[Danny McBride]

Yeah, you gotcha.

[Conan O'Brien]

Make sure you watch the gate close behind you when you get home, but don't. Don't just assume that no one's walking in after you.

[Matt Gourley]

But don't worry, I'll be dressed like Duke from GI Joe.

[Conan O'Brien]

You're gonna go to shut the refrigerator tonight.

[Danny McBride]

That was, like, the Halloween thing of, like, feeling, like, insane writing the shape. This was like, I. When I'm, like, right in the climax of it and we're sitting here and I'm putting things like Cobra Commander and Snake Eyes fighting, I just had to, like, stop and, like, go downstairs with my wife, and I'm like, this is nuts. I used to do this when I was a kid. Every day I'd make these guys fight each other. Now I'm writing that shit.

[Matt Gourley]

You're living my life. I'm so excited.

[Conan O'Brien]

Wow. Tears of blood from that Gorely.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

The. I've. I. I do think that. And I chalk it up to pure luck. But there are so many times now where I'm doing something. I realize this is how I goofed around as a kid, and now I'm doing it, and people are saying. And cut. Nicely done. I'm not getting yelled at.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yeah.

[Danny McBride]

They're not telling you to clean up your toys. They're paying you handsomely.

[Matt Gourley]

That's all fine. Let's get back to G.I.

[Sona Mifzesian]

joe.

[Danny McBride]

Joe.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Walton Goggins. I. I have to ask you about Walton Goggins because, you know, I know him a bit, and he's been here. He's just a fascinating Creature.

[Danny McBride]

He really is.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

He re.

[Conan O'Brien]

I mean, and I mean, you must have, the second you saw him do anything, thought like, oh, I got to know that guy 100% because he's such a. He's like a. Walton Goggins is a character you would create. I mean, the person. Walton Goggins.

[Danny McBride]

The universe pushed us together. I love, love him so much. He's one of my best friends. And, yeah, I mean, since the very first time we worked together in vice principals, him and I have just had such a fast friendship. And, you know, we went to. We took our families to Greece together last year and.

[Conan O'Brien]

Just hilarious.

[Danny McBride]

He. Yeah, he's just so funny and so good.

[Conan O'Brien]

He was here to do the podcast. I don't know if you remember this, but they. He got here a little bit early, and then his. One of his people said, walton's very tired. He's going to take a power nap for five minutes. And he went into that little office where you were sitting, that little green room with the couches and the sliding door that goes outside. And I walk by and he's asleep on the couch. But he looked like Dracula sleeping in his casket. He was like this, and his eyes were closed, and he slept really hard for exactly five minutes and then came in here and he. He gave us a full blast of the Goggins.

[Danny McBride]

I love it.

[Conan O'Brien]

He gave us full Goggins.

[Matt Gourley]

Full metal Goggins.

[Conan O'Brien]

Full metal Goggins. Yeah.

[Danny McBride]

When we went to Greece last year, it's like, you know, I mean, he is. He's a force. And it was awesome walking around Greece. Everyone recognized him. He had such a stellar year with White Lotus. And everyone was coming up, and Walton was dressed for it. I mean, we would go out and Walton is, like, in full white linens. And then, you know, I'm there with my kids. They're wearing, like, Crocs, you know.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Danny McBride]

We'll take this photo. We'll take the photo for you. We go to these beach clubs, and, like, everyone in his family are just, like, finely dressed and just look like they're off a ma. A magazine. I just got my little redneck kids

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

in,

[Danny McBride]

sitting here with bad suntans.

[Conan O'Brien]

So he's like Aristotle Onassis and Jackie Onassis walking around Greece off the yacht. And then you got.

[Danny McBride]

I'm like, you know, Randy Quaid and, you know, vacation. Just like, wait for me.

[Conan O'Brien]

You're like, I'm going to get them Duke boys.

[Danny McBride]

Wow.

[Conan O'Brien]

I wish I could have again. I would just want to shoot that we just want to see the B roll of you guys walking around having a killer time. Unbelievable. Well, I. This has been a huge shot in the arm. I didn't even need a shot in the arm today, but I was. Was weird. I do this sometimes. I'll be driving in and I think, hey, I get to see Danny McBride today. And I love his book and so happy for him. And I just love talking to you and getting any time to hang with you. And I will take you up on your promise to just the three of us. You, me, Sturgill, Simpson.

[Danny McBride]

I'll coordinate it.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'll pay for the meal. You guys pick the Outback Steakhouse.

[Danny McBride]

I'd love that.

[Conan O'Brien]

And we'll go there. And if Goggin wants to drop by at some point, we'll bring him, too.

[Danny McBride]

He would.

[Conan O'Brien]

He might.

[Danny McBride]

We might have to change what we're wearing. If he comes, we're.

[Conan O'Brien]

We're going to have up our game, you know. Well, Danny, thank you for dropping in. And congrats on the book. I love it. Thrilling Tales of Modern Men.

[Danny McBride]

Awesome. Thank you.

[Conan O'Brien]

This won't air.

[Danny McBride]

Great. That's fine.

[Conan O'Brien]

When you're on a GLP1, you often experience a smaller appetite. That means for GLP1 users, every bite of food should be as nutritious and delicious as possible. And that's where Sprouts Farmer's Market comes in. I knew they'd come in somewhere, and I guess now's where they come in. From nutrient dense foods to proteins to supplements that help sustain muscle mass and energy levels, Sprouts has you covered. And with in store wellness experts available guidance is always within reach for any GLP1 journey or broader health goals. Visit sprouts.com to find a Sprouts market near you. You know what? Yeah, I need lots of data to run this business.

[Sona Mifzesian]

You're a big data guy.

[Conan O'Brien]

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[Sona Mifzesian]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Tame your data chaos with EverPure. Visit everpuredata.com to learn more.

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[Matt Gourley]

Here we are, we're talking about Blaze Tax. This is part four and maybe an ongoing series and hopefully it doesn't, you know, hopefully it ends well.

[Conan O'Brien]

Blay along with his mother are part of a criminal gang where Blay was able to write off his various nerd collections of swords, lightsabers, Darth Vader helmets, whatever else he can think of. He was writing them off because he was bringing them up on the podcast. And if the Internal Revenue Service is listening, and I think they should be, I think he should be investigated. And now you were a stranger to all of this, Matt. I edited because you were out on a, I think a nine month paternity leave, which is fine.

[Matt Gourley]

We began with conception and then ended with delivery.

[Conan O'Brien]

Ended with her starting at a very good college in the northeast. But now, so you have a fresh approach to all this. We haven't heard your opinion. So you speak, you listened to what Blay was up to and what'd you think?

[Matt Gourley]

Well, God, you know, I love you, Blay. And this only comes out of concern.

[Trevor Noah]

Oh, boy.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, it's not going to be good when you hear that stuff up front.

[Matt Gourley]

I'm just concerned that you're doing things backwards, that. You know what I mean, that you're coming on and saying that I should. After you've purchased these, like, oh, I'm gonna mention them now, as opposed to having an actual solid reason for bringing them on the show, which I think would justify a write off.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Huh? Yeah. Well, how can I bring them up if I don't already own them?

[Matt Gourley]

Well, I think they have to be organically.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

This is organic. He talked about the pens.

[Sona Mifzesian]

No one needed to mention the brand.

[Conan O'Brien]

Why'd you say is it called. What's it called again?

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

No, it's called it. It's a, called the, it's called the Kindle Scribe.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

By Amazon.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Oh, boy.

[Conan O'Brien]

I find it suspicious that you give lots of labels. You give a lot of. This is how. This is what it's called. This is where it's available. I think it's a really reasonable price. Get yours now. Click to proceed to cart.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

You said what Kind of pen you had. You said it's an Aurora pen and it's really nice. Didn't you say the kind of pen?

[Conan O'Brien]

I did say that.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

But I don't think he's writing it off.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

How is that different?

[Conan O'Brien]

If you could have written it, It's a gift.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

No, I'm just writing it off.

[Matt Gourley]

But I think the difference is if was to say like, oh, I was taking out the trash last night. Hefty trash bags. And they are good trash bags.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

The force, you know the difference. Odor play, you know the difference. Which is I just said this is a nice pen. It's an Aurora. I'm not expecting anything from Aurora. Were they to give me something which would be very nice, if I got a free pen from Aurora, I would accept it, but I would never mention it on air.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

No, I know.

[Conan O'Brien]

Although I might. I probably would. Aurora. But anyway, that's not what I would. Very good pens. It's just a pen that I use and it's a pen that I have right now on camera.

[Sona Mifzesian]

You can't write with it normally. Well, you have to write on an angle. No offense, Aurora, but what the fuck?

[Conan O'Brien]

Also, it's everywhere.

[Matt Gourley]

You're right. Throw that thing into a hefty trash bag.

[Conan O'Brien]

Squirting all over the place. Sonny, when I watched how you tried to write with this, I was appalled because listen, you're. You just came right down straight. It was a 90 degree angle. It was completely perpendicular. And I felt, I was like, oh my goodness.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Goodness.

[Conan O'Brien]

And 11 year old me was appalled.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Oh, no.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

That is not how one holds a pen and pen.

[Sona Mifzesian]

The one with the one who wants the stamp that. That 11 year old version of you.

[Conan O'Brien]

All I wanted was a void stamp.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Oh, I really wish I could, you know, impress that 11 year old version of you.

[Conan O'Brien]

Go out with me stamp, kid.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Hey, you like stamps

[Conan O'Brien]

a rubber stamp. It's really fun. And you get to like with real authority say void.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Oh, no.

[Conan O'Brien]

Remit. I wanted a remit stamp. So now what?

[Sona Mifzesian]

What? Me no blade, remember? I get it, I get it. Oh yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Auroras are great too.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

All I want to do is a quick shut up and then onward to blay Blay.

[Matt Gourley]

I just don't want to see anything happen to you, that's all. I can.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Thank you.

[Matt Gourley]

I appreciate it.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

It. I.

[Conan O'Brien]

The reason I do want to see something happen to you, I would be delighted if you and your mother who does your taxes for reasons that still escape me, even though she's not a tax person, she gets you on the phone. And then she calls.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

What is it she's good at TurboTax.

[Conan O'Brien]

She calls Turbo Tax and, you know, calls TurboTax. You don't call. I'm doing your part for you. Calls Turbo Tax. Who calls Turbo Tax? I did that for you as a gift to you.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Thank you very much. Anyway, who calls TurboTax?

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm just showing you that I can do your role on this podcast, too.

[Sona Mifzesian]

If you know you.

[Conan O'Brien]

I won that argument with my Hubba Bubba.

[Sona Mifzesian]

You're writing it correctly. Is it an Engle?

[Conan O'Brien]

You mentioned all the products buy Amazon readily available. I think it's a good price. I know what you're up to. I see what you're doing. And you leaned in, and you also still do the thing we've talked to you about, which is you put your mouth over the mic like you're eating a giant kielbasa and you shout into it.

[Sona Mifzesian]

You need to grab it. He's grabbing it, too.

[Conan O'Brien]

He grabs it. What is the. What are you grabbing?

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Well, because Eduardo and I share. Ooh.

[Conan O'Brien]

No one likes Mike separating. Eduardo is not having.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Well, no, I was just saying we share a mic, so I. I need to grab the mic to pull it over to me.

[Conan O'Brien]

Why are you yelling?

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

I don't know. I'm trying to take. Can I just. In defense, the reason why I say what it is is not to write things off. I'm not going to write this off. It's in case people are like, oh, that's pretty cool. Where can I get that? That's pretty. I like that product. I would like to buy it also.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, so that's where your role here is on the. On the podcast is to direct people towards items that are in your life that they might also have an affiliate

[Matt Gourley]

link where you get a percentage.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

You know what? We could have an affiliate link for the podcast to make a little extra dough on this.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, can I say something? I like paper, and I like the idea that. And. And I'm never going to be someone that wants to doodle and then press a button and it goes into the cloud.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

Okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

Because guess what? You think you're saving paper, but now server farms have to handle my doodles. And we're burning valuable energy. We're burning fossil fuels so that somewhere a server farm can hang on to my little guy that's going bibble babble, dibble.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

But you could lose your doodles. And this is. My notes are being saved forever.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's important. And you know what? It's important that your thoughts are saved Blay for all of time. Well, I've never said anything that's more ridiculous. We're going to end there. But Blay, I've got my eye on you. I think you're up to no good. And if the IRS is listening, his name is Aaron Blair.

[Matt Gourley]

That's the thing though, is the IRS has been gutted.

[Conan O'Brien]

So you're gutted.

[Sona Mifzesian]

We can all just.

[Blay (Aaron Blair)]

And you know what?

[Conan O'Brien]

The worst criminals like Blair are going to get away with murder.

[Matt Gourley]

It's like tax fury road right now. Just go for it.

[Conan O'Brien]

Go for it. Well, if that's the message of a of our podcast today, it's if you're thinking of cheating on your taxes, just go for it.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Do it.

[Unidentified Dell Ad Speaker]

Conan o' Brien needs a friend. With Conan o', Brien, Sonam of Session and Matt Gourley Produced by me, Matt Gourley executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross and Nick Leow. Theme song by the White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Bautista and Brit Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign [e-mail] Conan and if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O' Brien needs a Friend. Wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

[Trevor Noah]

Hey, what's going on over there? It's me, Trevor Noah. You know me. You don't know me.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, you do.

[Trevor Noah]

I was worried there for a second. Well, if you know anything about me, you'll though I love having interesting conversations. Conversations where we scratch beneath the surface, like what's really going on in the news? Or what is that celebrity really thinking about that scandal that they had? Or what's the worst way to be a parent? I mean, you want to find that out so you can be the best parent, right? Well, regardless of what it is, this podcast is all about figuring that out. Talking to interesting people who have interesting ideas that give us an interesting perspective on the world that we're living in. So make sure you tune in. Check out what now with Trevor Noah, available Now on the SiriusXM app.

[Sona Mifzesian]

Hi, I'm Angie Hicks, co founder of Angie from Roof Repair to Emergency Plumbing and More when you use ANGIE for your home projects, you know all your jobs will be done well. Angie the one you trust. Define the ones you trust. Find a pro for your [e-mail].