John Mulaney Returns Once More

Summary

Podcast Summary: Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend – Episode: John Mulaney Returns Once More

Host and Guest Introduction

In this episode of Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend, Conan O’Brien welcomes the exceptionally talented comedian and actor, John Mulaney, who has recently launched his Netflix talk show, Everybody's Live with John Mulaney. The conversation promises a blend of humor, nostalgia, and insightful discussions about the entertainment industry.

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1. Lighthearted Banter and Friendship Goals

The episode kicks off with Conan and John engaging in playful banter about forming a comedic and lasting friendship. Their chemistry is evident as they joke about the idea of getting into humorous legal disputes.

• Conan O’Brien [05:59]: "I need to lawyer up. This is gonna be a few phone calls. I'll take you on any day. I'll like us to be in a long, protracted lawsuit that nobody understands."

• John Mulaney [06:10]: "I'd love it. And we start having to refer to each other as Mr. Mulaney and Mr. O'Brien."

Their exchange sets a jovial tone, highlighting their mutual respect and camaraderie.

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2. "Dab of the Decade" Recognition

Matt Gourley, a recurring guest, congratulates Conan on being named "Dab of the Decade," a humorous accolade voted by fans.

• Matt Gourley [01:49]: "I wanna just congratulate you because you got something called dab of the decade."

• Conan O’Brien [02:04]: "Wait now, wait a minute. Explain this to me."

The conversation humorously explores the absurdity of the accolade, complete with Conan's self-deprecating remarks.

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3. Nostalgia for Saturday Night Live and Late Night Shows

Conan and John reminisce about their experiences at Saturday Night Live (SNL) and late-night television, comparing the chaotic yet creative environments.

• Conan O’Brien [07:18]: "But then they all go their separate ways from David Geffen. The documentary goes on for another bunch of years, and then they're all. The Eagles break up..."

• John Mulaney [15:35]: "Yes. If we thought of an idea and it wasn't just anti Establishment. No, it was just really ideas that delighted us."

They discuss the intense behind-the-scenes dynamics and the pressure to constantly innovate in the entertainment industry.

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4. Broadway Dreams and Stage Experiences

Conan expresses his long-held dream of participating in Broadway productions, inspired by John’s successful Broadway stint.

• Conan O’Brien [43:38]: "Something you've done that I've always been curious about is you've done Broadway. And I have always been curious about it."

• John Mulaney [45:00]: "And it's just I've always imagined the part that seems that I've romanticized is walking to the theater like late in the afternoon."

John shares insights from his five-week run in the Simon Rich play All In, highlighting the collaborative and festive atmosphere of Broadway.

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5. Fashion and Personal Style

A significant portion of the conversation delves into the importance of personal style, with both hosts appreciating each other's sartorial choices. John credits his polished look to lessons learned from his father, emphasizing how dressing well can impact one's presence and success.

• Conan O’Brien [49:30]: "I think you put things together in a very thoughtful, crafted way, and it's all of a piece. Like, it makes sense to me that you dress as John Mulaney."

• John Mulaney [50:19]: "It just set a boundary of. I'm like, just one man. It's why I love lawsuits. One man dressing down another."

They discuss how attire can influence perceptions and relationships, especially in professional settings.

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6. Memorable Encounters: Paul McCartney Story

Conan recounts a fascinating encounter with Paul McCartney at Roxboro State Park in Littleton, Colorado. During a casual chat, Conan boldly critiques McCartney’s musical evolution, leading to an unforgettable interaction.

• Conan O’Brien [38:44]: "I told him the group they had before they were the Beatles was the best. And everything after that was shit. And then I knew to walk away."

• John Mulaney [40:24]: "I bet his head was spinning."

This anecdote showcases Conan's unfiltered humor and John’s appreciation for such fearless comedic exchanges.

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7. Insights into Live Television and Show Production

The duo delves into the complexities of producing live television shows. John praises Conan’s ability to maintain creativity under pressure, drawing parallels between their respective shows.

• John Mulaney [43:38]: "But you've done that twice now."

• Conan O’Brien [41:04]: "He wanted to show in its entirety a cut sketch that Bob Newhart starred in called Dave's Superstore."

They discuss the challenges of live broadcasting, including last-minute changes and the importance of adaptability.

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8. The Mystery of the Conan O’Brien Photo at Roxboro State Park

Towards the end of the episode, Sona Movsesian introduces an intriguing mystery about a signed photograph of Conan hanging in the office of Colorado Park Rangers at Roxboro State Park. The team speculates humorously about how this might have happened.

• Sona Movsesian [60:05]: "Colorado park rangers are desperate to know why they have a photo of Conan O'Brien in their office."

• Conan O’Brien [62:05]: "Maybe somebody who worked as a park ranger in this area of Colorado took a liking, for some reason we don't understand, to my comedy stylings and asked me if I would autograph something for the park rangers."

The segment adds an element of mystery and humor, wrapping up with the hosts playfully debating the origins of the photo.

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9. Closing Remarks and Final Banter

Conan and John wrap up the episode with more lighthearted jokes and reflections on their friendship. They reiterate their mutual admiration and tease future interactions, maintaining the episode’s warm and friendly atmosphere.

• Conan O’Brien [56:00]: "You're one of my favorites as a person and as a maker of things."

• John Mulaney [56:14]: "I Love you very much as a person, and it's really nice to see you."

Their heartfelt exchange underscores the podcast's mission to forge genuine friendships beyond Hollywood façades.

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Conclusion

This episode of Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend offers listeners a delightful blend of comedy, heartfelt conversations, and behind-the-scenes insights into the lives of two comedy giants. From nostalgic anecdotes about SNL and Broadway ambitions to playful speculations about mysterious photographs, Conan and John provide a captivating and entertaining dialogue that both longtime fans and new listeners will appreciate.

Notable Quotes:

• Conan O’Brien [05:59]: "I need to lawyer up. This is gonna be a few phone calls. I'll take you on any day."

• John Mulaney [38:44]: "I told him the group they had before they were the Beatles was the best. And everything after that was shit."

• Conan O’Brien [51:26]: "I think it's connected."

• John Mulaney [50:19]: "It's why I love lawsuits. One man dressing down another."

This comprehensive summary captures the essence of the episode, highlighting key discussions, humorous exchanges, and the evolving friendship between Conan O’Brien and John Mulaney.

Transcript

[Conan O'Brien]

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[John Mulaney]

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[Conan O'Brien]

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[John Mulaney]

Hi, my name is John Mullaney and I feel litigious nice about being Conan O'Brien's friend.

[Conan O'Brien]

Sir.

[Sona Movsesian]

Fall is here, here they yell back to school, ring the bell, brand new.

[John Mulaney]

Shoes, walking blues climb the fence books and I can tell that we are.

[Conan O'Brien]

Gonna be friends I can tell that.

[Matt Gourley]

We are gonna be friends.

[Conan O'Brien]

Hello and welcome to Conan O'Brien needs a friend sitting here with sonam of session, of course, Matt Gourley and what's going on? Sona, you have some analysis.

[Matt Gourley]

I wanna just congratulate you because you got something called dab of the decade.

[Conan O'Brien]

Which is dab of the decade.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah. You have been voted by the people as the top guest on Hot of the whole run.

[Conan O'Brien]

Wait now, wait a minute. Explain this to me. They had like a series of people were up for like a bracket. There was a bracket. Oh my God, look at this picture. Oh my God, look at that. I mean, look at that.

[Matt Gourley]

You were up against Ariana Grande in the last round and there's a picture of the two of you and her picture. She's stunning. She looks gorgeous. She's beautiful and she's beautiful and you like right underneath her you're this crazy person and there's milk just coming out of your mouth.

[Conan O'Brien]

A true monster.

[Matt Gourley]

Absolute monster.

[Conan O'Brien]

A true monster.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Nosferatu beat out Snow White.

[John Mulaney]

Post breastfeed Nosferatu.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. That's insane. So how many people who knows about this contest really knows about it? How many people were in the brackets. How many people were I up against?

[Sona Movsesian]

Was it every past guest of Hot Ones?

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah. Okay, so there were eight people. It started with eight people.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay.

[Matt Gourley]

First you're up against Jennifer Lawrence, so you know who I love and who's hilarious. The other people are Paul Rudd, Shaq, Idris Elba, Gordon Ramsey, Jennifer Lawrence, Lorde and Ariana Grande.

[Conan O'Brien]

Wow. That's actually a decent lineup.

[Matt Gourley]

And these are all really memorable Hot Ones episodes. I mean.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. You know, wow. So I won Dab of the Decade.

[Matt Gourley]

And they really chose such flattering pictures of everyone.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's okay. You know me, right, Sona. You know me. And what. What's picture that I would want out there?

[Matt Gourley]

You would want this picture?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[Matt Gourley]

The craziest thing, I was just thinking.

[Conan O'Brien]

Like, if my time. Whenever my time comes and I pass on to the next realm, if the New York Times runs an obit, I want that photo. I want that photo.

[Matt Gourley]

Your funeral. When they have pictures on the.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes, yes. There's a picture on the easel next to the casket or the urn.

[Sona Movsesian]

Laser etched headstone.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes. I want it to be that. And most people will think, oh, I don't know who he is, but he apparently choked to death.

[Sona Movsesian]

You should have your headstone laser etched with that. But there's a little opening that just shoots milk out of your mouth.

[Conan O'Brien]

Milk mixed with hot sauce. So people walking by the grave. And there's a motion sensor. There's a motion sensor that senses someone's passing and it shoots a mixture of 2% milk and hot sauce at you. And you're like, jesus, I'm trying to go visit my grandmother. And I accidentally pass by. Who's Conan O'Brien?

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, my God.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Matt Gourley]

A lot of things they can etch on your tombstone.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's the one right now.

[Matt Gourley]

Well, there could also be a little masturbating bear. Like your tombstone could be a freak show.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matt Gourley]

I mean, it's just all this stuff in your mind.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, you know, the technology will exist where it can be a hologram and different images can be coming up. So it can be me and the old timey baseball, you know, whatever. Different things that have gone viral over the years, moments from this podcast, and people will just pass this headstone and they'll have forgotten me. I'll be long forgotten. But they'll see these moments and they'll think this was a. What was wrong with this man?

[Matt Gourley]

This clown who was.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I don't know or what. What kind of brain disease did he have? He clearly had like some Sort of worm eating away his brain. He died a horrible death. Milk shooting out of his mouth. A bear jerking off on him. Oh, God, what a horrible way to go. This poor fellow. Well, I can't think of a better introduction. Might as well get to it. We should get into it. My guest today, it says a hilarious comedian. I think maybe the funniest comedian out there, who now hosts the Netflix talk show Everybody's Live with John Mulaney. I'm beyond excited that he's here today. He's one of the greats. John Mulaney, welcome. You want to lawyer up? Are you already lawyered up?

[John Mulaney]

I'm heavily lawyered up.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay. I need to lawyer up. This is gonna be a few phone calls. I'll take you on any day. I would like us to be in a long, protracted lawsuit that nobody understands.

[John Mulaney]

I'd love it. And we start having to refer to each other as Mr. Mulaney and Mr. O'Brien. There's a moment in the Eagles documentary where things get litigious, and suddenly it's like. What Mr. Felder fails to understand.

[Conan O'Brien]

Is.

[John Mulaney]

That we are a brotherhood.

[Conan O'Brien]

My favorite part of the Eagles documentary is there's a part where they realize that David Geffen is kind of taking advantage of them, and they unbelievably. And so the way the documentary lays out, if you watch the Eagles documentary, and you do not have to be an Eagles fan to love the Eagles documentary, You just have to have some time. Yeah, you just have to have some time. But it's a great documentary in the way things lay out. They got everyone to talk, so they have different Eagles talking about getting together, and then they meet David Geffen, and then David Geffen says, oh, they were the best. They're fantastic. They were amazing. I knew right away. And then they all start working together. Everything's great. And then some of them on camera start to say, yeah, but then we thought maybe this deal, maybe David Geffen's getting a lot of money. And they cut to David Geffen, and he went, ah, musicians are ingrates. You know, Totally. I think in the same day that.

[John Mulaney]

He go from Don Henley talking to Geffen, he goes, he's a malcontent. He's a malcontent. He's always been a malcontent.

[Conan O'Brien]

But then they all go their separate ways from David Geffen. The documentary goes on for another bunch of years, and then they're all. The Eagles break up, then they're all on their own, and Henley says, you know, I bump into David Geffen. And I'm thinking, what was that all about? Let's get back together again. And then they cut to Geffen, and he's like, I knew Henley. He was the voice, and he was the magical. He could do no wrong. And then they start working together for a little bit, and Don Henley goes, yeah. And then I started to notice that, you know, my socks were missing and my watch was missing. And then they cut to him and he goes, malka Kennedy.

[John Mulaney]

He's always gonna be a malcontent.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, we should get into that kind of lawsuit. People would love it.

[John Mulaney]

I'd love it. I love if we. Let's do something together and then fight over the rights to it until we bury each other in legal costs.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

That'd be so fun.

[Conan O'Brien]

And everyone will know about the beef we have because it will constantly. We'll make sure that it's constantly in the trades, but no one will ever really understand what it's all about. We should buy a piece of property together.

[John Mulaney]

It should also become a thing where the tactics, the lawsuit then become what we're fighting over.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

Where. Like the actual. You know, where I'm now just harassing you and you.

[Conan O'Brien]

Me.

[John Mulaney]

It's so funny. People love suing. They do just love it.

[Conan O'Brien]

They do.

[John Mulaney]

Well, I'll get. I'll see you in court, asshole. They love it. They love every part of it.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, we're going to start that. We'll tackle that later. Okay? I promise you there'll be a John Mulaney Conan O'Brien lawsuit coming very soon. Let me congratulate.

[John Mulaney]

Let's write one song together.

[Conan O'Brien]

Called We Will Always Be Friends. Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

We will always be friends. Friends.

[Conan O'Brien]

Two content men by the Contentors. Yeah. I want to compliment you. Everybody's live first episode. I don't know when this airs. When does this air, you idiots? I'm sorry. I'm looking at my own people, not you. John, I have nothing but respect for you because I don't see you that often, but I'm talking about the people I love and respect here.

[John Mulaney]

This episode, March 31st. Okay, well, okay, so we'll have done. So we'll have done three by then.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay. And, you know, we're not even going to edit this because I like people to see the process. We are fallible.

[John Mulaney]

Exactly.

[Conan O'Brien]

People don't know that you and I.

[John Mulaney]

And that this isn't coming to you right out of the mic. These are. He's banking these.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes, I'm banking these.

[John Mulaney]

He just has a bank of them.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

So he can sell the library.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Jimmy Carter still has two years to live as we record this.

[Sona Movsesian]

Now I have to edit.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay, that thing, you ruined it. All right, I fucked up.

[Sona Movsesian]

I'll see you in court.

[John Mulaney]

I saw that guy loved hospice. He was in hospice forever.

[Conan O'Brien]

He got better in hospice. Jimmy Carter's the only guy that went into hospice. And then like six weeks later, they saw him jogging around the neighborhood and lifting weights. He was down in Venice beach weightlifting.

[John Mulaney]

No, he really was. He was drinking pre workout powder and just doing leg days.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, it was crazy. Everybody's live. Your show makes me very happy.

[John Mulaney]

Thanks, man.

[Conan O'Brien]

And I really, I. I'm just delighted that you're doing it and kind of don't understand why nobody said, hey, I want to play with this format for a specific amount of time and really fuck around and play with it and then move on to some other stuff and then maybe come back to it. There was a, in my day, kind of a get down into the galley and pull that oar for. You know what I mean? An hour a day. And it's. It really does change the tenor of everything. And here you guys are just having fun and I'm not sure I know you're gonna do. You had the previous season, which had a different name.

[John Mulaney]

That was. Everybody's in la.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Right.

[John Mulaney]

And we covered the city of la. It was during the Netflix as a joke festival.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

So like every comedian was in town.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

And it was a funny situation that we're all in the town of Los Angeles. This. We've broadened out, you know, topic wise and where we're filming some stuff.

[Conan O'Brien]

And you have a very. Your monologue, I thought was. Was very funny, but you talk about. You had a focus group look at the name. Everybody. Everybody's in la. And you said people. A lot of people in the United States don't like Los Angeles.

[John Mulaney]

No, it's really. I was like, no, come on, people. It's not coastal. They say, live from New York, et cetera. Tonight I was like, people like, knowing the data. No, people don't like Los Angeles. And then after the fires, I thought now they might like it. Feel bad for it at least. No.

[Conan O'Brien]

And you know what's interesting is that.

[John Mulaney]

People pro fired the focus group.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. May have started it. Yeah, may have started the fire. Is running for president next year as a Democrat. The thing that's shocking is if you drift around LA and get a little north, like people in San Francisco hate la.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

People in LA don't feel that way. About San Francisco.

[John Mulaney]

I think they feel that way about any place.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, people in LA are quite. Oh, no, no, ask them about any place. Ask them about Boulder. They're like, oh yeah, Boulder sounds great. I've never been there, but it sounds great.

[John Mulaney]

And they love every area right outside of la. Yes, Any place. Cerritos. Oh, Cerritos. It's great. People love Palos Verdes. Anything near it. We're pro.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

There's not even like suburban, you know.

[Conan O'Brien]

There'S a very open mindedness towards other areas. But everyone's sort of decided that LA is a terrible place filled with terrible people. So I think you are right to change the title. Everybody's live.

[John Mulaney]

And it's also funny to cave just to be like, like to be at a. It struck me as a funny situation to kind of be like, I've been able to do a lot of things in the past few years and I have some options. It wasn't like it's this show or the highway. So, you know, the fact that I caved so quickly on a thing like the title was to me funny in and of itself.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

They go, we want you to take out la and me to go, okay, yeah, yeah, whatever you want.

[Conan O'Brien]

So it would be funny for you to. You would enjoy being a narc, for example. Or to, you know, if I did.

[John Mulaney]

If so, if I didn't have to. Because some people, it's like, you know, you get busted with, you know, with a kilo and you're like, you gotta flip on some other guys, that's a jam. But to choose to narc, to choose to narc outta the sheer fucking love of it.

[Conan O'Brien]

So to sell secrets to the Russians and not even profit from it.

[John Mulaney]

I love those people the most. The actual pro. The actual pro Russia people.

[Conan O'Brien]

Or they're not even pro Russia, they just enjoy it. It's fun to sell state secrets.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah. What was Alger Hiss? Was he getting money or was he just like. I just. Some people I think gave secrets because they're like, it can't be so one sided.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right, Right. He wanted to even things out.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Alger Hiss did something too. Like he hit microfilm in a carved out pumpkin, I think. Listen, he was. Yeah, you kids, you better bone up on this. But Alger Hiss, of course, really was how Richard Nixon made his career. He made his bones prosecuting Alger Hiss. There you go. Little fun fact for you kids that are listening right now. This is why they won't let me have a weekly TV show anymore. I would turn your show so quickly into Alger Hiss history.

[John Mulaney]

Yes. I'm seriously, seriously skating that right now. That's very nice. What you said about the show. That means a lot, Late Night. I mean, you. It's so funny because you did the same thing, but at the highest possible stakes nightly. And I don't think now doing it a little. I mean, meaning six episodes in one, but just having a taste of it. I'm like, there is a thing where you just can't help but do it differently because, you know. And I got the sense those early years of Late Night, it was like you guys couldn't help but make it as. It's almost like for you to do the best job possible, you had to make it as weird as it was.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

Like that to you was doing a good job.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes. If we thought of an idea and it wasn't just anti Establishment. No, it was just really ideas that delighted us. But we knew that anyone randomly tuning in would probably be very confused. Except, you know, a young John Mulaney who might really like it. If only I had known you then, that would have. I've said this to other people. It would have given me great solace to know that you were out there as a kid rooting a son.

[John Mulaney]

Oh, my God.

[Conan O'Brien]

But I. But yeah, we would do. I think of the things we do now, and it's like watching yourself skateboarding over sharks, you know, in doing some stunt that you did at the time without thinking too much about it. And now I look at it and I'm frightened for the younger me because we would do a whole episode where Andy and I got locked in a meat locker and we had flashbacks. It's insane because we'd only been on the air for a couple of months and we were totally. I think it was all very suicidal and nobody was happy. We were making ourselves happy. But one of the things I saw on your show that really made me happy, it's a great idea, was you got a bunch of people together who had played Willy Loman, some of them from Death of a Salesman, some of them quite like a bunch of very famous actors.

[John Mulaney]

Christopher Lloyd, Anthony LaPaglia, Rob Morrow.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, you got them in there and you did a focus group with them as a bunch of Willy Lomans. And it just. We live in this era where I think people got intoxicated at some point with comedy having a point and comedy meaning something and comedy driving the conversation. And the conversation, you know, whatever.

[John Mulaney]

The conversation became a term. Yeah, exactly. I never used to hear about.

[Conan O'Brien]

About the conversation no, and I also, you know, I think it's a feedback loop sometimes because the press. That's big cover name names, the press likes to cover that stuff. So if.

[John Mulaney]

And by the way, it's.

[Conan O'Brien]

It.

[John Mulaney]

Those shows are good and those people do good work and it's easier to cover. It's. I wouldn't know what to write. Covering comedy is also bizarre because it's kind of an objective result. Like it kind of worked or it didn't. Right, sorry. It's intensely subjective. But then in terms of the show, doing the piece, it worked or it didn't.

[Conan O'Brien]

But I think I just love when there's a really funny idea that's very creative. I enjoy it so much more and I swear to God, I'll go to my grave thinking it has a power that's hard to understand, but it's there. So the Willy Loman thing was making me really laugh. I really love you throwing to commercials that don't, aren't. Are not commercials that don't need to exist. But I know that you grew up seeing people, you know, like me or Letterman or whatever, throwing to commercial. And you know that it's part of this rite R I T E this religious right that you say, we're gonna take a break, but it's, you know, you're not selling anything.

[John Mulaney]

I stole Cavett's. He always said, we'll be back after this message. Which I found was like a weird way to refer to commercials. They're just. There's a statement a company wants to make a statement.

[Conan O'Brien]

We know we in no way.

[John Mulaney]

No. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

We in no way profit.

[John Mulaney]

It's like doing tv. It feels like. It feels like doing like tv. When TV were on tv. When TV were on tv.

[Conan O'Brien]

I don't think. I don't think you should have a show anymore.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, I know.

[Conan O'Brien]

I think you've.

[John Mulaney]

This is pre recorded.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, that's the other thing too, that.

[John Mulaney]

Feels like doing broadcast tv.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes. Well, also, you start the show at. What time do you start it?

[John Mulaney]

In the 7pm Pacific. We go live, 10pm New York.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right. But it was kind of exciting. You walked out and you said, hello, everybody. You know, it is 9:01.

[John Mulaney]

Oh, yeah. I give time and temp. So 7:02 in Los Angeles the other night it was 67. It was rainy.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Yeah. And it was. I don't know, it was just. There's something about that where I thought a lot of people, if they're gonna do live tv, they wanna do something like, I'm gonna put my head in a tiger's mouth, and that's gonna make it compelling. You were giving the exact time and temperature, and I found it exciting. Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

Thank you. I appreciate that a lot.

[Conan O'Brien]

Thank you. It's like, wow.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, I appreciate that. Great.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I could also look at my apple watch, but I don't know. It looks like you're having fun, too.

[John Mulaney]

It's incredibly fun. I would say doing those six episodes was. And then working on this new incarnation. It can be tiring, but it's never hard. It is a really. It just is really fun. I have to say, I haven't had a lot of experiences like that where there's kind of no other than wanting to realize the things we want to do as best we can. There's no, like. I don't know. There's not. There's no obstacle. Maybe there should be some. But there's no obstacle.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right. Also, I got a little bit of nostalgia because you're coming from Sunset Gower Studios, which is where Greg Daniels and I started. That was my first. We got out of college. Summer after college, we're sending out, trying to write for tv. We got crazy lucky and got a starting gig at a show called not to show the News that taped at Sunset Gower Studios.

[John Mulaney]

Nice.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's still imprinted on my brain. I felt that we had gone to Saturn. That's how strange it was to go from Boston, Massachusetts, and I had been on a plane, like, twice. And I'm suddenly in Los Angeles expecting to see Eric Estrada. You know, you just keep thinking, where are the celebrities? This is where the celebrities are. And you're walking around Hollywood and you're mostly seeing sex workers and the Walk of Fame.

[John Mulaney]

Barbara Broccoli.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I remember being stunned at how seedy. I misunderstood. And Greg, my partner, Greg Daniels, did too. We confused Hollywood with, like, Beverly Hills.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

So I thought Hollywood was where all the stars lived, and that's where the mansions were. So we got a place, like, on Koreatown. And then we were like, let's get spiffed up and go over to Hollywood. And we were walking around the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

[John Mulaney]

Nice.

[Conan O'Brien]

Which, of course, is you're dodging vomit. And it's grim. It's very grim. And I remember being.

[John Mulaney]

Well, you could buy. I mean, you could go buy a sword or a bong or something.

[Conan O'Brien]

You're right. I was too harsh.

[John Mulaney]

Sunset Gower's great. Because when you actually go to bigger studios in Los Angeles, there's such remote areas other than Paramount. There's such remote, overwhelming faceless just all consuming areas. Once you drive on the lot, Sunset Gower is like next to the Gower Gulch, which is like a western themed Rite Aid. And the Arby's sign that's sort of famous.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

Which is no longer even an Arby's. Right. And then like there's like a gate and you drive on and it's like a few bill. Sunset Gower is just very low key.

[Conan O'Brien]

Sunset Gower looks the way a studio's supposed to look from like the 1920s.

[John Mulaney]

The Blazing Saddles type studio of everyone running in. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes, it's someone. And there'd be a bunch of people outside with autograph books waiting for a star to sign an autograph.

[John Mulaney]

You know that Elvis story with the Paramount lot?

[Conan O'Brien]

Which one?

[John Mulaney]

So when he first started making movies, he drived through those Melrose gates and he had to hide under all these coats, you know. Cause the girls would be swarming the gates and didn't want to know which car he was in. And he makes a movie, goes to the army. Movie, movie, movie, movie, movie. He's deep in like, you know, you know, Blue Tampa or whatever the films were by the end.

[Conan O'Brien]

Girls, girls, girls.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, I think that was even kind of a hit. This is like the late era, later 60s. And the colonel would still tell him to hide under the coats, but there was no one waiting.

[Sona Movsesian]

We have to do that for Conan when he comes.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh man. I do a lot of traveling. You know that I do the travel shows. Nothing quite like the feeling of an upgrade when you're traveling. Well, as a T mobile customer, you can take the perks with you.

[John Mulaney]

That's good.

[Conan O'Brien]

Isn't that nice? It starts the moments you take off with free in flight Wi fi so you can stream your favorite show on the go. Obviously that would be this show, I would think.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah. You go in a plane and then you stream your podcast.

[Conan O'Brien]

If I'm anxious about a flight, the thing that calms me is seeing myself. And then when you land, T Mobile's got you covered with 15% off all Hilton brands. Did you know that?

[Matt Gourley]

No.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yep. Plus you're covered with 5, 5 gigabytes count em 5 of high speed data in over 215 countries and destinations with go 5G plus or next plans. And I have to tell you, it's a nice feeling. When I travel the globe for my travel work, I like to know that when I land in that other country, I'm covered, I'm there. Yeah. I can text you and say, hey, I got here safely. Yeah, I forgot to feed my cat. Could you feed my cat? You could remind me I don't have a cat.

[Matt Gourley]

Right.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's all good stuff. Yeah.

[Matt Gourley]

You facetime me before. From another country. And it was crisp. She was clear.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yep. You could see every mark on my face. Find out how you can experience travel better@t mobile.com Travel qualifying plan required Wi Fi where available on select US airlines. Terms and conditions apply. How hot do you like it? Firehouse Subs is turning up the heat. They've teamed up with hot ones to create two new sandwiches. The zesty garlic hook and ladder is the milder option. Can you believe that? Though still packed with flavor. And for the bravest spice chasers, the spicy dill hook and ladder sandwich is sure to be a three alarm situation. Well, Sona Blay, you guys sampled the wares today.

[Matt Gourley]

We did.

[Conan O'Brien]

You had yourself. Those hook and ladder sandwiches. How were they?

[John Mulaney]

They were great. And they had a kick.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah, they did. I. I did the zesty garlic hook and ladder and I loved it.

[John Mulaney]

I took a walk in the wild side with the spicy dill hook and ladder. And it was great. I loved it.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I'm glad you guys enjoyed yourselves. Find out how hot you like it. Try the zesty garlic and spicy dill hook and ladder at Firehouse Subs for a limited time. Life doesn't go on forever. You gotta grab the moment, dude. Visit firehouses.com to find a restaurant near you. Individuals sensitive to spice or the Carolina reaper pepper should not consume the spicy dill hook and ladder. Limited time at participating Firehouse Subs restaurants. Hey, guys. Spring cleaning time. Let's start with your mop. Cause that overgrown winter hair ain't doing you any favors. You look like Mo from the Three Stooges. It's sport. It's an old reference, but look it up. It's Sport Clips. Haircuts. They've got pro stylists who know men's hair, TVs playing sports 24, 7. And a place built for guys. That's right, guys. To get a great cut without the hassle. No appointments, no stress. You just wander in. Fresh cut. In a place that's made for you dudes.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah, bros. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

High fives all around. So shake off that winter scruff and step into spring looking fresh. Cause they got you covered, brah. Sport Clips. It's a game changer. I have a story. Sunset Gower story. Which is I was once driving to work. And I know exactly when this would have been. Cause you could look it up. But I'm going down Gower Street. I take the right off Sunset. I'm going down Gower. I see a parking space and I turn around right near where Paramount is.

[John Mulaney]

Sweet.

[Conan O'Brien]

I do a U turn, an illegal U turn really quickly. And a car is just then pulling in to the gates. And I almost hit it. And I stop fast in my shitty car. And the person looking out the window at me is Eddie Murphy. Oh, he's not driving. He's being driven. He's in the passenger side, and he's shooting the Golden Child. So I almost ended Eddie Murphy's life as he was making the Golden Child. What year would that be?

[Sona Movsesian]

That movie came out in 1986.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay, that's perfect.

[John Mulaney]

Weekend is Three Amigos.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh. Oh. Is that true?

[John Mulaney]

Yeah. And it beat Three Amigos at the box office. And those Three Amigos guys will tell you that at the drop of a hat.

[Conan O'Brien]

But Three Amigos has aged better.

[John Mulaney]

Exactly. But you can't convince someone of when. When people feel attached to something, it's in a sweet way. They're very like, well, it didn't open. Golden Child won the week. You know, I think it's done. Okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

Since they never get over it.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, a little bit.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

In a nice way.

[Conan O'Brien]

It doesn't sound nice to me.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, I know. I'm just cushioning the story of how petty they are. I'm trying with some interjecting positivity at the end. No, but it's nice. They're fixated on their own failures. It's narcissistic. But it's sweet. It's nice. It's nice. But it's nice.

[Conan O'Brien]

You can always just. It's nice.

[John Mulaney]

Marty can't see the forest for the trees. He's completely blindsided by failure. But it's sweet.

[Conan O'Brien]

He's a good guy.

[John Mulaney]

It's nice and it's fun and people like it, and it's nice. It's good to always remember the Tates.

[Conan O'Brien]

And the LaBiancas were murdered within two days. But it's nice.

[John Mulaney]

It's nice. It's nice. That's nice. It's Los Feliz.

[Conan O'Brien]

I want to pay you another compliment because that's the kind of guy I am. And this comes from the heart. I went to the snl.

[John Mulaney]

Comes from the heart with no eye contact. I know, I know. I gotta tell you a compliment.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's how we do it so much. I'm sorry. Gotta look at this rubber coaster.

[John Mulaney]

Solid guy.

[Conan O'Brien]

Here we go. Look at that. Look at that. It's so Irish. And it is St. Patrick's Day today?

[John Mulaney]

Hey, happy St. Patrick's Day.

[Conan O'Brien]

And guess what? I'm not doing this intentionally. I'm not a fan of St. Patrick's Day. I'm not a. Kiss me. I'm Irish guy. And so I. People are always giving me shit for not wearing green. And I always. It's not a statement. I just completely forget. So I'm wearing. You think it's a statement?

[John Mulaney]

I'm sure it's a statement.

[Conan O'Brien]

I wanted to compliment you because I went to the SNL 50th, and I know that you were a creative force, a writer behind the SNL 50th, along with some other fellows. Yeah. Was it Simon Rich?

[John Mulaney]

Yes. I was back, too, and I. And Emily Spivey, Paula Pell, James Anderson. Tina was working as well.

[Conan O'Brien]

I have to say, I thought the show was great. I had good seats, didn't know anything that was gonna happen. It's interesting. I think enough time has gone by, and I loved my time at Saturday Night Live, but I needed. All of us have war stories. All of us have some form of PTSD from the intensity of that time of our lives, that. That all this time went by and I came back and I just had a blast.

[John Mulaney]

Oh, that's great.

[Conan O'Brien]

I loved it. I loved talking to everybody. I enjoyed the show. I thought it was really well written. I thought it was paced really well. I was stunned at how much content there was. I just. I mean, from beginning to end, it was cool.

[John Mulaney]

There was so, I mean, granted, recurring sketches and things that had been done before or and the like, but there was so much new performance. Like, it wasn't. They showed a couple. They showed the Schiller's Reel with John Belushi. They showed a couple filmed pieces, but that was it.

[Conan O'Brien]

They showed a few commercial parody montages.

[John Mulaney]

Oh, that's right.

[Conan O'Brien]

There were very few montages. It was mostly.

[John Mulaney]

And that was mainly to make acts and get, you know, like, set transitions.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Mulaney]

So it was. It was. It was a lot of new.

[Conan O'Brien]

It was a lot of new material. One of the revelations, and I just brought him up, and I'm so glad I didn't kill him. In 1986, I had a great seat to watch Eddie Murphy do two of the sketches. He was in my seat, was just looking right into it. And I maintain, if he's not the most talented person to ever grace Saturday Night Live, I don't know who it would be. He became Tracy Morgan. I watched him. I watched him getting ready. Band's playing they're counting down. We're getting to within 30 seconds. His face is still completely neutral. He walks. He gets behind the podium where they're gonna play Jeopardy. He picks up his controller. And then I saw his face morph, and he became Tracy Morgan with, like, three seconds to go. And then he's in a Scared Straight sketch.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Which is in the exact same position. And he was mesmerizing to watch. I'm. I'm stunned by him. I really am.

[John Mulaney]

And also, it felt like a lot of Saturday Night Live on display in one moment, which is. He says he's all the way Ray because he never does anything halfway, but his hair is braided on one half and then sticking up. And it was like that dumbass funny joke that Jost wrote. Then the hair department made that wig specifically for that. It looks perfect. And the sketch starts, and it's just sort of like a broad touch. And then he has that joke. It was just a lot of things, every department, you know, hard at work on, like, oh, it was the funniest, dumbest joke.

[Conan O'Brien]

I had a absolutely lovely time. And this was, I think, a week and a half or something before the Oscars, and I didn't have time to go. And this. Something in me said, you have to go.

[John Mulaney]

Oh, that's cool.

[Conan O'Brien]

And I got my ass there and just loved it and loved getting to talk to Lauren and tell him. I hope some of this is sinking in. Lauren, at what you've achieved. I want that for you. Getting to talk to so many people from over the years, some of whom worked on my late night show for a while when we were in Rockfarrel center and then drifted back to snl. But I thought it was a triumph. And wow. I mean, I can't imagine everything that went into putting that show together.

[John Mulaney]

What was fun was, from my perspective, months out there was Radio City, nothing Saturday and then the broadcast on Sunday. And I talked to Lauren and he'd tell me a couple things that were gonna be at Radio City, and then he would tell me, and Sunday, I think it's Paul and maybe one other DJ tale this for months.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right. Which Paul?

[John Mulaney]

Exactly.

[Conan O'Brien]

You never know.

[John Mulaney]

He broke a broom in half and said, fight it out. They both won. They both won.

[Conan O'Brien]

Which Paul? The one who had a partner that they didn't get along. That still doesn't help.

[John Mulaney]

Wait, real quick. Speaking of Paul McCartney, I have to. I feel bad because one of the two participants should break this joke. But right after the 50th, Marty Short did the end of the show, you know, the good nights. He had introduced McCartney. And then he was doing the goodnights and thanking everyone and thank. And thanks Paul McCartney. And it's big applause and all crazy. And then right after the credits are done, Fred runs up to Marty and he goes, dude, what did you say? And he goes, what? What? And he goes, you said Tony McCartney.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, my God.

[John Mulaney]

And Marty goes, what? Oh, my God. Damn it. And he was like, you said Tony McCartney.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's fantastic.

[John Mulaney]

It's such a good bit.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's such a good bit. Because I would imagine immediately believe that.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Because. And this isn't true. Armisen. Who would lie about that.

[John Mulaney]

Exactly. And when you're speaking in a setting like that live on tv, you really do feel slightly disconnected. It just all feels like air coming out of you. And dude, you said, Tony McCartney so messed up.

[Conan O'Brien]

I had a.

[John Mulaney]

And what if. And Tony McCartney. And everyone still kind of applauded. But Tony. Marty had lost his mind.

[Conan O'Brien]

Did he tell him right away? I'm just kidding.

[John Mulaney]

I'm not sure how long. Probably right away. Away.

[Conan O'Brien]

They probably still haven't told him. It's why he's gone into seclusion. You know, There was the. The show and then there was a party at the Plaza, man. And I went to that party at the Plaza.

[John Mulaney]

I got beef with that party again.

[Conan O'Brien]

What's that?

[John Mulaney]

I got beef with that party again.

[Conan O'Brien]

What. Which is the.

[John Mulaney]

The 40th and the 50th. Everyone's trying to talk. And these musicians get up and start playing.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

And it stinks. I want them off the stage. They're so loud.

[Conan O'Brien]

We can't have a conversation.

[John Mulaney]

You can't have a conversation. We all want to sit and stand in various areas talking poorly about our contemporaries.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

Thank you. Out there trying to do an arcade fire. Get out of here.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

I wanted to get a little spray bottle of water and just scoop them off stage. I was so mad.

[Conan O'Brien]

Like you're training a puppy.

[John Mulaney]

Exactly. No. What about us? Looks like we want to move our bodies and dance. We're all tired and we wanna speak lovingly but poorly of our contemporaries, co workers, the show as a whole and what the planning was like.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

And you. I remember at the 40th that. Who's that guy?

[Conan O'Brien]

I didn't get to go to the 40s.

[John Mulaney]

Gets up.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

And everyone talks about this, like, as the greatest night in New York history. It stunk. They sounded like a wedding band. It was like Elvis Perkins, Paul McCartney, you know, maybe Aykroyd. All of them just Playing at once loudly. And then Prince got up, and we had to act like that was a big deal. And I'm just trying to. I just was like, I just wanted to talk shit with Bobby Moynihan. Yeah. It was such a bump. It's so not what this is about to me. Loud guitars I had. I was really mad. And then when I saw them start to plug in at the 50th, I left. I said, I can't do everything.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay, well, here's the thing.

[John Mulaney]

I know how to make a good party. We would lower the music, and we would all quietly say slightly negative things. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. There were different levels at the Plaza. And I walked in and I decided I knew there was music, and I didn't go towards the music. I stayed down. There was a bar.

[John Mulaney]

I ended up in the lobby where there were couches.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Just hung out. I went past the lobby, There's a bar area, and I'm standing at the bar area, and I had said hello to a couple of people, and I turn around, and Paul McCartney's standing right there. And I'm an insane Beatles fan. I've interviewed him a bunch of times, but I always assume, I think correctly, that he's. He's met too many fam. He's met too many people in his life. So I don't say, like, hey, Paul, you know who I am? We start chatting. I tell him I really liked the Golden Slumbers medley. And I like how the guitar parts at the end are so distinctive because the three Beatles played them.

[John Mulaney]

Paul first, then really cool, dude.

[Conan O'Brien]

Sounds really cool. I know, I know, I know.

[John Mulaney]

I like three guitar parts.

[Conan O'Brien]

Sorry. I know. I'm saying. I know. I'm celebrating my dorkdom.

[John Mulaney]

Three guitar parts. Because all three of you Beatles played them.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, I didn't remember the other one's names.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, all three of you.

[Conan O'Brien]

And so he.

[John Mulaney]

Joel and Rob.

[Conan O'Brien]

But he's chatting and he's like, oh, you know, he's talking about it, and we're having, like, a nice conversation. Goes on for a while. I said a couple of things about. I think a couple of nice things about more contemporary work he's done. He seemed to like that. And then he said, well, you've said some nice things to me. He said. And then he said, maybe you want to even it out a little. Like, you know, you've said some nice things. Maybe you should. Maybe you want to go the other way for the next comment. And I said, you guys peaked.

[Matt Gourley]

Jesus. Oh, my God.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm sorry. Fucking. I said, you guys peaked with the Quarrymen. Everything after that was shit.

[John Mulaney]

That's great.

[Conan O'Brien]

And he didn't laugh. He looked a little surprised. But I basically told him the group they had before they were the Beatles was the best. And everything after that was shit. And then I knew to walk away. And I thought maybe, maybe that's gonna penetrate everything else he's heard tonight. Maybe he's gonna wake up at 2 in the morning, go, did that fucker say that I peaked with the Queen?

[John Mulaney]

I mean, I think three people in Liverpool Prize said that. And it stuck with them. Yeah, like when you was playing Weddings, you was better. And they're like, you know, it stays with you. And you go like, yeah, I'd like to see that lady see us now, you know. And with the Tony McCartney insult, I bet his head was spinning.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, he didn't know he had. He was taking punches left and right.

[John Mulaney]

My point, sorry. The thing I was, I failed to say was that those conversations with Lauren, like, I feel like in a marvelous way, in order to get the collective heart rate where it needed to be, that show was not planned till much closer to it than I realized. I mean, you would know, but it really was. It was really fun. It was humorously down to the wire. And then it passed the point of humor. Yeah, it was great.

[Conan O'Brien]

I knew that that would be the case because that's the way it has to be. I also knew.

[John Mulaney]

And it got there and it was really hard with a two year run.

[Conan O'Brien]

Up and this is selling very.

[John Mulaney]

He got it there.

[Conan O'Brien]

Very hard to do that.

[John Mulaney]

It's like if they announced that Thursday.

[Conan O'Brien]

They announced two years out that they were going to be going to Mars with a rocket and it's the night before and they're trying to figure out where the nose cone is.

[John Mulaney]

Or they're like. Or it could be Venus. And you're like. Like to get everyone there with such a good feeling. But by Thursday, to create an atmosphere where like me and Tina and Seth and Jost are running into each other going, what the hell is happening? Like, that was real. That was a work of art. The stress leading up to it was a work of art.

[Conan O'Brien]

Selling out Jim Downey. But I know it was. Cause Jim Downey was calling me, pitching things.

[John Mulaney]

Oh, yeah. To me, like showing that full Bob Newhart sketch.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. A week before and saying, wait. I said, yeah, I think I'm gonna be able to come. But wait, you want me to do something? I don't think I'm doing anything. And he's like, no, no, it'd be great. It'd be great. And also with Norm, you could do a Norm thing, but you could also do this. And I said. And I got the impression. I started to have the impression that he was wandering around the basement of 30 Rock with a phone and the cord had been snipped. He wasn't talking. And so he. He was pitching things that I don't think had any chance of happening.

[John Mulaney]

Well, he wanted to show in its entirety a cut sketch that Bob Newhart starred in called Dave's Superstore. Have you ever heard of? It's like, based on, you know, those Midwestern stores, like a Ben Franklin which sells Hummel figurines and kites and any.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, is it the store that has everything?

[John Mulaney]

Kind of.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Mulaney]

And so it's, you know. Hey, do you have a crossbow made out of white chocolate?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

Oh, we have one. And so it's that bit with Bob Newhart. It sounded great, but in the middle of the 50th, Jim wanted to show it in its entirety. And I thought that that was such a funny thing to be pushing within 72 hours of the Broadway.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes, yes. And I was getting these calls from Jim, like, so it's. Hey, it's all planned. You're gonna introduce a sketch. And I.

[John Mulaney]

It's all planned.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, it's, you know, the fix is in. You're gonna.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And so I discreetly reached out to some other people who said, no, the.

[John Mulaney]

Best call was the Saturday before. I was about to fly in for the week. And Jim goes, now when are you going to be in the office? And I go, well, I land Monday at this time. He goes, but what time are you getting in? I was like, I'm not sure what time I'm arriving at the office. He goes, I will commit now to keeping bankers hours if you do. I will commit now to keeping bankers hours.

[Conan O'Brien]

Something you've done that I've always been curious about is you've done Broadway. And I have always been curious about it. Cause it's always been kind of like a secret dream of mine.

[John Mulaney]

Why secret?

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I don't know it just now for such a long time. There were years ago I was offered a chance to do the Music man, which I was built to do. And it was this big production of the Music man, but I was doing the late night show at the same time, and we realized there's no way that's gonna work. It was just not gonna work, and.

[John Mulaney]

I didn't do it. You would have been done. What time were you done taping? 6:30. You walk over to what, the Winter Garden?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

You could have done it.

[Conan O'Brien]

I know you could do it now, but I, I'm not kidding.

[John Mulaney]

You could totally. Why wouldn't you?

[Conan O'Brien]

I saw you and Nick Kroll do. Oh, hello. I had such joy watching you guys up there, but. And then you invited me up for some to. To be part of the madness for a little bit as you did with Secret Guests. And it was so fun and I always thought, oh, I know what I would love. I don't want to have to carry a Broadway show, but I would love to be a cameo in a very funny, successful Broadway show. Sort of like King George in Hamilton.

[John Mulaney]

Hamilton, Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

I want to come in like Jonathan Groff and get my laughs and then go backstage.

[John Mulaney]

Like you could do Master of the House and like.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, I just would love the idea of living in New York for a couple of months.

[John Mulaney]

Oh my God. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And. And you've done that. You've done that twice now.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, we just did. I did a five week run in what was a total 10 week run of the Simon Rich play all in. So I was in it, opened it with Richard Kind, Fred Armisen and Renee Elise Goldsberry and then Chloe Feynman joined the cast when Renee was. And it was great. Five weeks at the Hudson Theater, which is a great theater for comedy and with Richard and Fred, Chloe and Renee and Alex Timbers who's directed my past two specials and I've worked with on lots of things and who had directed. Oh, hello. So it was the best. It was like Christmas on Broadway for five weeks with very close friends, written by my favorite person in the world.

[Conan O'Brien]

And it's just I've always imagined the part that seems that I've romanticized is walking to the theater like late in the afternoon. Like you say it's winter, sun going down. I'm headed to the theater. I'm on tonight. Goodbye. Goodbye, darling.

[John Mulaney]

You get a big expensive ass coat. Big ass collar, walk down the street.

[Conan O'Brien]

I hadn't thought of the coat. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Mulaney]

Imagine you were picturing a little tiny cheap coat.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[John Mulaney]

Big ass coat, barely long overcoat, big ass collar like Babe Ruth.

[Conan O'Brien]

I exactly know the coat you're talking about.

[John Mulaney]

You know the one I mean? Yeah. And the big hat.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, I want it all. I think that would be so much fun.

[John Mulaney]

This is one of those things I bet that you will not do soon enough and you should do it.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah.

[John Mulaney]

What? Go do it. The world. You.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm busy.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, sort of.

[Conan O'Brien]

Not really. I know I'm not busy.

[John Mulaney]

No, you are busy. But you can fit it in, you know?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. So proud. I didn't make a crass joke there, you know, Fit it in, but. You know what I mean? No but. And I'm sand joke. No, but here's the thing.

[John Mulaney]

You've turned a family program into something else entirely.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know what I meant by fit it in, though, right?

[John Mulaney]

Oh, Jesus.

[Conan O'Brien]

Do you remember. Do you know what I was talking about?

[John Mulaney]

Do I know what you're talking about? The euphemism of fit it in.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, I get it. Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

And honey, I'm laughing on the inside. Look, I'm not. I'm not the. The stiff patrician guy, you see, I've got a body sense of humor. Not on the air. Not ever. Not ever. So I.

[Conan O'Brien]

That was a mistake.

[John Mulaney]

Families are sitting around one big radio listening.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's the depression.

[John Mulaney]

It's the Depression.

[Conan O'Brien]

And I. I just want you to know what I meant by fit it in. Do you know what I mean?

[John Mulaney]

I know what you meant.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's like a guy with a. You know what I'm saying?

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah. I think we all get it. If you go to New York, can Matt and I come too?

[Conan O'Brien]

No.

[Matt Gourley]

Maybe we can come.

[Conan O'Brien]

This is my big chance.

[Matt Gourley]

We can do the podcast.

[Conan O'Brien]

There is a buzz out there that you've been holding me back. Oh, and this is my chance to wear a big ass coat.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah. And people go, is that Babe Ruth? Oh, no, it's Conan. That excitement of the bambino.

[Conan O'Brien]

No musc. No athletic ability. That's Conan.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah. He doesn't have the athletic physique of one of one Babe Root.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Six more of those conings.

[John Mulaney]

Not jacked like George.

[Conan O'Brien]

Hey, you know what? The thing is, the three of us should walk around in one big coat.

[Sona Movsesian]

Are we side by side or, you know, we're side by side.

[John Mulaney]

So huge lapels.

[Conan O'Brien]

Giant lapels.

[Matt Gourley]

Gets all arms.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And eating a hot dog.

[Sona Movsesian]

We each get an arm.

[Conan O'Brien]

You and I. Oh, you and I.

[Matt Gourley]

You should do Death of a Salesman.

[John Mulaney]

You should do Death of a Salesman. Oh, and tap into the barely hiding rage. You know, act like it.

[Conan O'Brien]

I like that it's at all hidden. Sure. Yeah. I have to ask you too, about your style, because you brought up the big ass coat. You've got great style. That is something that eluded me a lot of writers get, especially from my era. All of us owned, like two shirts. We looked like shit. We lived in shitty apartments. You One of the great comedy writers, certainly of your generation, of all time. You always. It seems like you know how to dress. Where did you know how to dress? When did you know how to. You always look good.

[John Mulaney]

You're a sharpest of you to say.

[Conan O'Brien]

Don't you think that that's true? I mean, always.

[John Mulaney]

So I'll tell you this story. The first time I ever came to New York, I was 13. I was with my dad, and we're walking around downtown New York, and two memories that meant a lot to me, both just how to comport yourself as a person. This guy's coming down the street that my dad had done a deal with, and the guy had been super unethical. So he walks up and he goes, hey, Chip Mulaney. And my dad goes, I'm not shaking your hand. And we're. And he goes, I didn't mean to do that in front of you, but that man was very unethical in a deal we did. I thought, I've never seen anything so badass in my life. That's great. Just. I'm not shaking your hand and walk away, because I also. My parents always were talking about being nice and polite and friendly and neighborly. So I just liked the boundary of. I'm like, just one man. It's why I love lawsuits. One man dressing down another.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah.

[John Mulaney]

One man excoriating another. So then we go to NYU Law School. My dad wants to see a classroom that's been dedicated to a federal judge that he once clerked for, this guy Ed Wein, who had passed away by then. So we walk up into the law school, and there's a security desk, and there's a student who has misplaced their id, and the security guard is giving them, like, a ton of shit. Like, well, I can't let you back. And, you know, you can't get into the library without. And my dad's wearing just a jacket and tie just because. And we just walk right past the security guard, and as we're walking up the stairs, my dad doubles back and looks at me and goes, the power of dressing well. Yes.

[Conan O'Brien]

So do you think that's maybe where it came from?

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, I think so. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

I wear, like, a tie sometimes at home so that my kids think. I mean, like, it's a bit put on. Obviously, I don't need to be wearing.

[Conan O'Brien]

It, but I understand it's become. Your aesthetic is attached somewhat, I think, to the work you're doing. Like, you are a sharp dresser. Your choice of words is better than Other comedians. And I think the whole thing is.

[Matt Gourley]

No, no, I'm laughing at what he's doing.

[Conan O'Brien]

I know, I know. I think it's connect. I think it's connected.

[John Mulaney]

I do think it's connected.

[Conan O'Brien]

I think you put things together in a very thoughtful, crafted way, and it's all of a piece. Like, it makes sense to me that you dress as John Mulaney.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah. I will say I am genuinely very comfortable in the things I wear. And if I were more comfortable, I am often not comfortable in jeans and New Balance. And I don't know, what would Ray Romano wear?

[Conan O'Brien]

An $8 Casio watch.

[John Mulaney]

You know, I don't mean to name names, but what would a plebeian like Ray Romano wear? That's who I was picturing. As I went feet up, I was like, open shirt. Who am I seeing here? Modern day Ray Romano. But I feel more comfortable doing it. You always dress very nice. Nice.

[Conan O'Brien]

I. I learned over time to. To.

[John Mulaney]

When I was a writer at snl, I wore the same thing every day.

[Sona Movsesian]

Yeah.

[John Mulaney]

Because I heard Obama had dark gray and dark blue suits with a red tie or a blue tie. So he never had to think about what to wear.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right.

[John Mulaney]

So I got a ton of Gray Heather 5050 cotton T shirts from American Apparel and then khaki pants from J. Crew. I would wear that. And a. If it was cold, I'd wear a blue crewneck sweater. And it's the only thing I Wore for like four years.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's very interesting. When I started, which is 85, the old timers at that point were people that worked on counterculture television. And they were all they. They would go up into their office and smoke pot. They wore out of Pride T shirts and ripped jeans. And I remembered thinking, that's not me. I hadn't quite figured out who I was. But over time, I saw the value of I don't wanna look like a bum. And also, when I had kids, I liked looking like a dad.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know what I mean? I liked, for some reason, come in and I've got, you know, I would wear sometimes my tie from work home. And I would. They would see that when I worked, I was dressed up and I thought, yeah, I want them to have that idea of what a dad is.

[John Mulaney]

That's really funny.

[Conan O'Brien]

Someone who. Who is supplied Tom Brokaw suits by NBC and then wears makeup when he comes home.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah. Like a dad. Yeah. Having a lot of bass on.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Eyeliner.

[John Mulaney]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, the show which I really love, everybody's live. It drops live On Wednesday nights. Is that correct?

[John Mulaney]

Yeah. Wednesday Night Live, March 12th. We started. We're done. May 26th.

[Conan O'Brien]

And it's really fun, if you can, to watch it.

[John Mulaney]

If you can.

[Conan O'Brien]

If you can watch it live. If you have. If it's. If it's in your schedule.

[John Mulaney]

Sorry, I thought, like, it's really fun if you can watch it. You know, I thought you were speaking in general. I was like, you can. Just. A hard plug would be nice at this point, if you don't mind. Check out one episode.

[Conan O'Brien]

A lot of people don't have access to television. You know that.

[John Mulaney]

Oh, right. Shame.

[Conan O'Brien]

Only for the 1%. Whatever. You're in a bubble, so. Yeah. Yeah, I guess. Yes. Everyone go out and buy a new television.

[John Mulaney]

Let me tell you something. When I see you on the street in New York, I'm not shaking your hand.

[Conan O'Brien]

You don't like the way I've comported myself.

[Sona Movsesian]

Wait, this is your lawsuit. Here you guys go.

[Conan O'Brien]

Hey, here we go. N. That's not it. No, I think we need to. It can't be.

[John Mulaney]

It can't be defamation. It's. I needs to be over the rights to something.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes, yes.

[Sona Movsesian]

Yeah, I'm going to sue you for that.

[John Mulaney]

You could sue him. Honestly, being like, oh, there's the show became. Was. We were integral to it. You know the way. Like. Like. Cause he'll be like, nah, it's my show. I do whatever I want with it. You know, he's the Don Henley. He's the Malcontent. Yeah, but you guys are the Don Felder.

[Conan O'Brien]

You're Don Felder and Joe Walsh. Yeah, and I can just.

[Sona Movsesian]

Schmidt.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. I'm just gonna leave you behind. And then you say, no, no, no. I was in the room when you came up with Hotel California.

[John Mulaney]

That's what you should say. I was in the room and I contributed content essential to the creation of the work.

[Conan O'Brien]

Hey, you were in the room when I said, do you think it'll fit? Oh, oh, you know you can fit it in, right? You fit it in.

[John Mulaney]

No one wants credit for it.

[Conan O'Brien]

And you, you were in the room and you want credit for that.

[John Mulaney]

You were integral to that.

[Sona Movsesian]

I both want credit for it, and I feel sexually harassed, so I assume both sides.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. I'm gonna let you go, sir, because we've.

[John Mulaney]

Nice to see you, man.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, you're one of my favorites. You're one of my favorites as a person and as a maker of things.

[John Mulaney]

Thank you.

[Conan O'Brien]

And I. One of my all, all, all time favorites. And I'm just.

[John Mulaney]

I Love you very much as a person, and it's really nice to see you. And I've been thinking about you a lot, so.

[Conan O'Brien]

Wow.

[John Mulaney]

I hope.

[Conan O'Brien]

Thank you so much. Life is good.

[John Mulaney]

You seem good, which is great.

[Conan O'Brien]

Just before I went out to do the Oscars, I got a lot of texts from a lot of people. You sent me one of the most meaningful texts I've had in my life of quick text encouragement, the eggplant emoji, and said, I hope you can fit it in.

[John Mulaney]

I hope you can fit it in. You know what that means, right?

[Conan O'Brien]

No, I don't. I don't know what it means. Why would I violate myself with such a vegetable? No, you sent me an email. A text. I'm not kidding when I say it. It gave me, like, a 20% boost of confidence. So, seriously, thank you very much.

[John Mulaney]

I'm glad it meant something. You're the best. We were so excited. It was so exciting to watch that show with everything going on in the world. And I don't know for, like, that, like, it, like, it just felt during that it was like. Cause, you know, like, it's a bad time in the world and no one saw any of those movies, but, like, for that show, it was like, things seem happy and positive and we're acting like everyone saw these and we know what they are. You know what I mean? We're like, oh, my God, it won that one.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's great. Great.

[John Mulaney]

You know no one saw a thing, right?

[Matt Gourley]

No one did.

[John Mulaney]

No one saw a thing. But you really did put on a show that said, this is a cool night and we're going to have fun. And that is. That sounds like a very simple thing. But as we were talking about comedy, that is, like, just not quite always messagey. It's harder to do.

[Conan O'Brien]

All right, well, listen, thank you for saying that. Go work on your show and keep enjoying it, because I can tell you're having fun, and when you're having fun, you're golden.

[John Mulaney]

Thank you, man.

[Conan O'Brien]

Go in peace.

[John Mulaney]

Go in peace.

[Conan O'Brien]

Airbnb, man. That's what kids are doing now. Yeah. Blay, you like your Airbnb, don't you?

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, it's great. Because when I go on a trip, you know, I'm gonna go back to Michigan for about three weeks, and my place is just sitting there empty. Might as well make some scratch.

[Matt Gourley]

Why not?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Scratch is money, right? Yeah, I think so. Write some greenbacks. And it's nice because you're gonna go stay in Michigan. That's right. That's where you're from. But why not make some money off your pad? Exactly.

[John Mulaney]

I'm staying with my mom. No one's staying at my place. Let's get some money from it.

[Conan O'Brien]

And it's a good feeling to know that your place is being used, it's being enjoyed, and you're getting paid for it. Yeah. And I got a cool place. Yeah. You know, I went to this bachelor party last year in Miami. Remember when I went to that bachelor party, I heard it was wild and I wasn't even invited. I just, I saw that there was a bachelor party and I went in. I have. Nobody my age is getting married. Yeah. And it just was so great. But I made sure that I rented out my home before I went to the bachelor party that I wasn't invited to. And it was a good feeling. Great.

[John Mulaney]

Made some money.

[Conan O'Brien]

Not a great feeling to be asked to leave the bachelor party.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Think about it. If you host while you're traveling, it's a great way to offset some of the costs of your trip. And if you've got a big year of travel ahead of you, hosting's a pretty cool and unique way to make some money back. And then you can buy that special travel purse you want or man bag or purse. 2025 is the year to be financially savvy. So don't leave money on the table when you travel. Your home might be worth worth more than you think. Find out how [e-mail] host does it ever feel like you're a marketing professional.

[John Mulaney]

Just speaking into the void? Well, with LinkedIn ads, you can know you're reaching the right decision makers. You can even target buyers by job title, industry company seniority skills. Wait, did I say job title yet? Get started today and see how you can avoid the void and reach the right buyers with LinkedIn ads. We'll even give you a $100 credit on your next campaign. Get started at LinkedIn.com results. Terms and conditions apply.

[Sona Movsesian]

All right, we have a mystery to solve that maybe only you can solve.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay, let's hear it.

[Matt Gourley]

Maybe I can do it.

[Sona Movsesian]

That's that can do American spirit.

[Matt Gourley]

Maybe I could do it.

[Sona Movsesian]

This is an article in Crack. Colorado park rangers are desperate to know why they have a photo of Conan O'Brien in their office. So it's a signed photo that's hanging in these Rangers office, and I guess they've changed personnel and there's enough turnover that nobody knows what the story of it is. And in the article, they're basically asking, can you shed some light on this.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, first of all, it's an insult. It's a huge insult.

[John Mulaney]

I knew you were gonna say that.

[Conan O'Brien]

No, it's true.

[John Mulaney]

I knew it.

[Conan O'Brien]

If. If someone takes over an office and there's a signed photograph in there of, say, Jerry Seinfeld, no one says, who would want this?

[Sona Movsesian]

That's not what they're saying.

[Conan O'Brien]

Why would this be in here?

[Sona Movsesian]

They want to know the story.

[Matt Gourley]

What is the picture?

[Conan O'Brien]

What does the story.

[Matt Gourley]

What does the picture say?

[Sona Movsesian]

I'll show. Okay, here's the actual tweet. It's insulting the Colorado park rangers, Northeast region. Hey, Conan O'Brien. We realize you're a bit busy today. This was during your Oscars. But at some point, can you explain the sign pick at Roxboro State park in Littleton, Colorado? No one knows the story, and we would really love to. You clearly left your mark on the park, though. And it says, your autographed photo says, to the park rangers, best Conan O'Brien. And then they tweeted a picture of all the mountains with little orange pompadours.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's nice. Let me see the photograph. Let's see. So, okay, this is a photo of the bearded Conan to the park rangers. It's on the TV if you want to look up Conan. Oh, all right. Well, there I am in my handsome beard phase. Huh?

[Matt Gourley]

I have an idea of how this happened.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Matt Gourley]

When you know, you. You get a lot of fan mail.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yep.

[Matt Gourley]

And it's your job of your assistant to take the fan mail, get the autograph picture, and then do it sometimes. And this is my fault. I would take too long to show you the thing so you would do it. But at that point, it may have been like a year after we got the actual letter. So somebody may have sent a letter asking for it.

[Conan O'Brien]

So someone said, we here at the park ranger booth. Where is it? Colorado.

[Sona Movsesian]

Yes. And apparently it has made the local news there. They're wondering as well.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay, well, big shocker. Maybe somebody who worked as a park ranger in this area of Colorado took a liking, for some reason we don't understand, to my comedy stylings and asked me if I would autograph something for the park rangers. And I sent it in, and they put it up on the wall, and it stayed there. And the fact that it's this big mystery is like someone shoving a hot poker up my ass. It's not. It's just insulting. I'm gonna go back to. It's insulting. We can't figure out, obviously, long before civilized man existed. I don't know if this will help.

[Sona Movsesian]

Or hurt, but the first ad on this page two is a big picture of an enlarged prostate. Has nothing to do with age. Just stop doing this one common thing. Can we play the local news segment that's on that page? There's a video there.

[John Mulaney]

Meanwhile, comedian Conan O'Brien hosted the show, leading to a very interesting question from.

[Conan O'Brien]

Colorado Parks and Wildlife.

[John Mulaney]

Where did this picture come from? So they posted this on X on.

[Conan O'Brien]

Sunday, a signed photo of Conan O'Brien.

[John Mulaney]

And asked this question, why does this exist? The signed photo is on the wall in the CPW office in Roxboro State park down near Littleton. They say no one knows the story.

[Conan O'Brien]

Behind it and they would like to.

[John Mulaney]

Find out why he left his mark at the office. Roxboro State Park.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay.

[John Mulaney]

To the park rangers. That's awesome.

[Matt Gourley]

That is cool.

[John Mulaney]

I wonder if he stopped down there. If he was in town, he must have. And maybe an ex IM employee had it signed. Who knows? I love it.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Who knows?

[Sona Movsesian]

Oh, my gosh.

[Conan O'Brien]

Let us know.

[Sona Movsesian]

This must be the most amazing place to live that they have literally no news.

[Conan O'Brien]

This is. I'm sorry, Roxboro State Park. And to those anchors, I'm with you. What?

[John Mulaney]

Yeah, what?

[Conan O'Brien]

Why is Conan here? The real question is. The question is why would someone like Conan. Why would someone cherish an autographed photo of Conan? What's that this doing here? That's what you say. That's what you say when there's like a weird crop circle that no one can explain. What does this mean? I'm sorry. Somebody in Roxboro State park once took a shining to.

[Matt Gourley]

My colleague, liked you enough to ask for a picture, but didn't take the picture with him or her.

[Conan O'Brien]

They didn't take it with them. It came and they were like, well, you got everything. Hey, what about the picture? You at. Eh, leave it it. Let's leave it. It'll be a real mystery. It'll probably end up on the news.

[Matt Gourley]

Why is Conan here?

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, I've got. We've got beef now, Colorado. We've got beef coming for you. I'm coming for you. I don't even know what that means. I'm coming for you. I know.

[Matt Gourley]

What do you mean?

[Conan O'Brien]

What do you mean you're going to.

[Sona Movsesian]

Now there's another mystery.

[Conan O'Brien]

That is another mystery.

[Sona Movsesian]

What did Conan O'Brien mean when he said we're coming for you?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, exactly. Oh, wow. That is hilarious.

[Sona Movsesian]

That's good. Conan O'Brien needs a friend with Conan O'Brien. Sonam of Session and Matt Gourley produced by me, Matt Gourley executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross and Nick Leow Theme song by the White Stripes Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino Take it away, Jimmy. Our Supervising Producer is Aaron Blair and our Associate Talent Producer is Jennifer. Samples, engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Bautista and Brit Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the TeamCoco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign [e-mail] Conan and if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien needs a friend. Wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

[Conan O'Brien]

Finding the music you love shouldn't be hard. That's why Pandora makes it easy to explore all your favorites and discover new artists and genres you'll love. Enjoy a personalized listening experience simply by selecting any song or album and we'll make a station crafted just for you. Best of all, you can listen for free. Download Pandora on the Apple App Store or Google Play and start hearing the soundtrack to your life. Carl's Jr. S new snack Stash was made for Munchy Madness. Mix and match any three sides, just five. Get onion rings, waffle fries and Jalapeno Popper Bites. Natural Cut fries, Fried zucchini, and why not another fried zucchini? Get any three sides in your snack stash? Just 5.99 only at Carl's Jr My.

[John Mulaney]

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[Conan O'Brien]

With any new triple burger purchase in the app Munch responsibly only for my Rewards members for a limited time of participating. Restaurants CF for terms.