Josh Brolin

Summary

Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend: Episode featuring Josh Brolin

Introduction In this heartfelt and engaging episode of Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend, host Conan O’Brien is joined by his regular team members Sona Movsesian and Matt Gourley. The guest for the episode is acclaimed actor Josh Brolin, known for his roles in The Goonies, No Country for Old Men, and Avengers: Endgame. Released on November 18, 2024, this episode delves deep into Brolin's personal life, his memoir, and his multifaceted career.

Early Life and Upbringing Josh Brolin opens up about his unconventional upbringing, highlighting the significant influence of his mother. He shares, “[14:08] Conan O'Brien: It’s so interesting because one of my favorite movies of all time, and I think I’ve probably told you this hundreds of times ad nauseam, but No Country for Old Men is one of my all-time favorite movies.” This sets the stage for a discussion about his formative years on a ranch, where he developed a strong work ethic and a manlier persona compared to traditional Hollywood lifestyles.

Brolin recounts, “[17:03] Conan O'Brien: Your dad, very well known actor, James Brolin.” This acknowledgment of his father's fame contrasts with Josh’s own narrative of striving to forge his path outside the shadow of his celebrity parent.

Career Highlights The conversation transitions to Brolin’s illustrious acting career. He reflects on his debut in The Goonies, stating, “[34:21] Josh Brolin: I came up. They said, go. And I heard everybody else coming up, so I was late. So I wasn’t thinking. I came up, I looked at it, I turned around, and I went, fuck.” This candid admission showcases the pressures and challenges faced by actors, especially those born into the industry.

Conan emphasizes the depth of Brolin’s performances, particularly in No Country for Old Men, saying, “[14:40] Conan O'Brien: In what way? What did he mean?” This underscores the profound connection between Brolin’s characters and his personal experiences, enriching the audience's appreciation of his work.

Personal Insights and Memoir A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to Brolin’s memoir, From Under the Truck. Conan praises the book, “[13:25] Conan O'Brien: This is a gorgeous book and it really is a powerful and is brilliantly written.” Brolin delves into the themes of his memoir, discussing his tumultuous relationship with his mother and the struggles he faced growing up. He shares, “[17:16] Josh Brolin: She was a character,” highlighting the complex and dynamic nature of his mother’s persona.

Brolin discusses his writing process, revealing, “[50:00] Josh Brolin: It was impossible to write about motorcycles. And I wrote and I wrote and I wrote and I kept crossing shit out and finally I said, I can’t do it. And the minute I said I can’t do it, I started writing.” This anecdote illustrates the organic development of his memoir and the deep personal connections he weaves into his storytelling.

Reflections on Relationships and Family The episode takes a poignant turn as Brolin addresses the loss of his mother in 1995, “[14:08] Conan O’Brien: ...you talk about these experiences where you would go with your mom, you’re a kid, she would go to a restaurant and it’s just the two of you.” He elaborates on the complexities of their relationship, sharing intimate details about his mother's struggles and their bond.

Conan reflects on the impact of these relationships on Brolin's life and career, “[43:33] Josh Brolin: ... my mother spinning, man. And my mom, what I don’t write about in the book too, they go, God, your mom’s like horrible.” This honest portrayal fosters a deeper understanding of Brolin's motivations and resilience.

Motorcycles and Personal Passions Brolin passionately discusses his love for vintage motorcycles, revealing, “[47:08] Josh Brolin: ...I rode my whole life. I raced dirt bikes...I have five different motorcycles.” Conan engages with this topic by asking about maintenance, to which Brolin responds candidly about the challenges of keeping vintage bikes operational. This segment highlights Brolin's dedication to his hobbies and the sense of freedom they provide him.

Interactions with Hollywood Legends The conversation also touches on Brolin’s interactions with other Hollywood legends like Robert De Niro and Sean Penn. He recounts, “[37:02] Josh Brolin: ... you just got a fucking face. Look at your face.” These anecdotes reveal the camaraderie and occasional tensions within the acting community, offering listeners a behind-the-scenes glimpse into Hollywood dynamics.

Closing Remarks As the episode wraps up, Conan expresses his admiration for Brolin’s honesty and wisdom, “[58:00] Conan O’Brien: ...he is a very honest person who has paid attention in life and you’re sharing what you’ve seen with people and you’re very wise and you’re hilariously funny and it’s a joy.” The mutual respect between Conan and Brolin culminates in a warm farewell, solidifying the podcast's mission to foster genuine friendships.

Notable Quotes

• “[14:08] Conan O'Brien: It’s so interesting because one of my favorite movies of all time, and I think I’ve probably told you this hundreds of times ad nauseam, but No Country for Old Men is one of my all-time favorite movies.”
• “[34:21] Josh Brolin: I came up. They said, go. And I heard everybody else coming up, so I was late. So I wasn’t thinking. I came up, I looked at it, I turned around, and I went, fuck.”
• “[50:00] Josh Brolin: It was impossible to write about motorcycles. And I wrote and I wrote and I wrote and I kept crossing shit out and finally I said, I can’t do it. And the minute I said I can’t do it, I started writing.”

Conclusion This episode of Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend offers an intimate and comprehensive look into Josh Brolin’s life, both personal and professional. Through candid conversations and heartfelt stories, listeners gain a profound understanding of Brolin’s resilience, passion, and the intricate web of relationships that have shaped him. Conan’s genuine curiosity and affectionate banter further enhance the depth of this compelling episode.

Transcript

[Conan O'Brien]

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[Josh Brolin]

Hi, my name is Josh Brolin and I feel so Don Cheadle about being on Connie Headlines. I don't even know what that means. What does it mean?

[Conan O'Brien]

Who knows?

[Josh Brolin]

Badass. Horny.

[Conan O'Brien]

You feel horny? Nice.

[Sona Movsesian]

Fall is here Hear the L Back to school Ring the bell Bell Brand.

[Conan O'Brien]

New shoes Walking loose Climb the fence Books and pens I can tell that we are going to be friends Yes, I can tell that we are going to be friends hey there. Welcome to Conan O'Brien needs a friend. And we have a wonderful podcast today, joined as always by Sonam of Session and Matt Gorley, I believe.

[Sona Movsesian]

I'm not even sure myself.

[Conan O'Brien]

And Sona, this has got to be a big day for you.

[Matt Gourley]

It is because.

[Conan O'Brien]

And we rarely do this, we rarely talk about the guest, but this guest is one of the stars of a movie which has become, over time, the Citizen Kane of your generation.

[Matt Gourley]

Defined a generation.

[Conan O'Brien]

Don't scream.

[Matt Gourley]

I'm sorry.

[Conan O'Brien]

We're all in the same room. Jesus Christ.

[Matt Gourley]

Blay's not here. I'm compensating.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, when.

[Matt Gourley]

When you say like the Citizen Kane. I. I don't know.

[Conan O'Brien]

You don't even know what I'm talk. Citizen Kane was a movie with Orson Welles.

[Matt Gourley]

I know what you're talking about. Okay, that is very insulting.

[Conan O'Brien]

I know. I don't think you know about things.

[Sona Movsesian]

I think he said it to insult you.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah. I meant to insult you.

[Matt Gourley]

I know what Citizen Kane is.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay.

[Matt Gourley]

Okay. Yeah, but it's. You know what it's just such a beloved movie.

[Conan O'Brien]

It surprised me. I'm just going to tell you the movie, it skipped me because I was a little too old. And when I say a little too old. Way too old.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

The movie came out, I believe, in 1985 or 86. And I am just 85. And I'm just getting my career started out in LA and I'm with my writing partner, Greg Daniels, and I remember the two of us. Was that name dropper? Yes, yes. Well, he's a big deal. I'm very happy for his success and someday I'll have some, too. But the point is, Greg and I remember this movie came out, the Goonies, which was a big deal. So we went to Westwood and we watched it and it was like a movie for kids.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And Greg and I were sitting there and we were like, okay, well, I guess that's a fun movie for kids. I remember being very annoyed that all the kids talk over each other. Other. I know, and I'm sorry. They also, the kids call gold rich stuff. And kids know the word gold. They just do.

[Matt Gourley]

Your criticisms of this movie are so tiny.

[Sona Movsesian]

I've never known a movie to have more of a dividing line on whether you love it or hate it. And it's all due to age.

[Matt Gourley]

Yes.

[Conan O'Brien]

And so it is.

[Matt Gourley]

It's all age. So anyway, you just don't get it.

[Conan O'Brien]

So. I didn't get it. I didn't get it. I'll be honest with you. I didn't get it. So flash forward all these years and you start working with me and blah, blah, blah, blah. And then at one point, I remember we're working at Warner Brothers studio together and someone mentioned, oh, Goonies was shot in this studio where we make our TBS show. You were like a nun that had seen the holy tomb of Christ. You exploded. I mean, bats flew out of you. There was an explosion, light came down. I heard Armenian songs that haven't been heard for thousands of years. And you went nuts and you were like, where's the spot? Where's the spot where they stood? Do you think that he stood here? Do you think that? And I didn't understand. And so our guest today, Josh Brolin, of course, one of the stars of that film.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And it's amazing.

[Matt Gourley]

I mean, it's not a Goonie from the beginning.

[Conan O'Brien]

No. He becomes. Explain. Because I don't know the movie. I lost track. I know they.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah, he's Mikey's brother, who is the main kid in it. He's played by Sean Astin. Sean Astin and yeah, he's. He's his brother. And then.

[Conan O'Brien]

And he's kind of.

[Matt Gourley]

He's a cool kid. Yeah, he's like the jock.

[Sona Movsesian]

Are you nervous today?

[Matt Gourley]

I am kind of. I also. Just because he's also Thanos.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. What do you revere more? Do you revere him for his Goonies role or for Thanos Goonies. Okay. Oh, what's your problem? He's Thanos. What's what?

[Sona Movsesian]

Thanos.

[Conan O'Brien]

That's.

[Sona Movsesian]

That's who he's become. And Sicario and. Oh, Sicario.

[Conan O'Brien]

Sicario's big. Yeah. Okay.

[Matt Gourley]

I don't know. Don't you have a movie that you think about from your childhood that you watch it and you're like, yes, this always makes me happy. That's the Goonies for me. You have to have something that like some emotion for something.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, Heidi, you know, she has super strength and she.

[Sona Movsesian]

Right, you're thinking of Pippi Long.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, Pippi Long's talking. Oh fuck. Let's do it again. Heidi. Oh no. Oh, it's too good. Fuck, I got the wrong one. Oh man, I'm still Pippi Longstocking. I remembered seeing an ad. There was a terrible Pippi Longstocking movie that came out like in the mid-70s. I'm staying at my grandparents house.

[Sona Movsesian]

Take it easy.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay. I'm staying at my. I mean it was made in. Where was it made? Sweden. Okay. And this is getting diced. And all I remember is my grandparents had this crappy little black and white TV that got no reception. And we're down in misquomacut Rhode island staying at my grandparents little cottage. And my brothers and I are crowded around and they kept playing over and over again this ad for come see the new movie Pippi Longstocking. And it looked weird and you could tell the voices were dubbed badly, right?

[Sona Movsesian]

Yeah, they're very bad.

[Conan O'Brien]

And there's a part where this awkward looking girl with pigtails who looked a lot like me at the time, like lifts a horse over old man. What's that?

[Sona Movsesian]

Old man is the name of the horse.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh fuck. What is your problem? You're not helping the conversational flow anyway.

[Matt Gourley]

Or your coolness factor.

[Sona Movsesian]

I'm not after coolness.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm after veracity. Yeah, so anyway, after hard facts, Pippi. Pippi. Like any good journalist, Pippi lifts the horse over her head. Ok. And the special effect is terrible. It's pretty good for the time. And anyway she lifts it over her head and then they cut a Swedish boy who's got like Red cheeks and like some chocolate on his mouth. And I'll never forget, it's so badly dubbed. And he goes pee pee. Are you crazy?

[Sona Movsesian]

See, that's quality.

[Conan O'Brien]

And that burned into my brain. Are you crazy? So that whole summer of 1974 on Crandall Avenue in Miss Huammukut, Rhode Island, I would walk around looking not unlike Pippi and going, pippi, are you crazy? Until I was beaten by my brothers. Yes, and rightfully so.

[Matt Gourley]

I would have beaten you.

[Conan O'Brien]

God, what a terrible looking movie. Anyway, we got off track, but it was the Goonies of its day. That was the Goonies before the Goonies.

[Matt Gourley]

You think so?

[Conan O'Brien]

No, I don't. I'm just being a dick.

[Sona Movsesian]

I was a big Goonies fan as well. Well, and I'll give you one guess to which my favorite Goonie was the.

[Conan O'Brien]

One that had all the secret inventions.

[Matt Gourley]

Yes.

[Sona Movsesian]

Yeah, exactly. So much so that when I was in junior high, I took a little like travel soap dish that could open and close and made a belt buckle out of it and put a little motor with a clock cog in it.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh my God.

[Sona Movsesian]

That would pop out like a saw blade. And so I.

[Conan O'Brien]

I have one question and I just. How much did I get? Laid? No, I just need a number. No, mine is how many times were you stabbed in school?

[Sona Movsesian]

None, because I was defended by a.

[Conan O'Brien]

So you were. You made a data. He's the guy that has like these weird devices that come out of his range coat.

[Sona Movsesian]

He plays the James Bond music when he enters the movie. I mean, come on. Oh, and he played by Short Round.

[Matt Gourley]

I was going to say before or after?

[Sona Movsesian]

It's after.

[Matt Gourley]

So you already were like, yeah, I love this guy, Indiana Jones. And then you saw him in the Goonies.

[Conan O'Brien]

You're like, oh my gosh.

[Sona Movsesian]

And then I went to junior high, popped open my plastic soap dish.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh boy.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh my God.

[Conan O'Brien]

I tell you what though, I'm not even joking.

[Sona Movsesian]

Normally I would self deprecate. I was cock of the walk that day. Let me tell you something, every kid was lining up to see that soap dish Sawblade. And I walked out of there with my head held high.

[Conan O'Brien]

I was cock of the walk. And I love that that hasn't been said. I'm getting it, I'm getting it right now. Oh, here it is. Hasn't been said since 1934. Franklin Roosevelt, after a fireside chat, turned to Eleanor and said, I'm cock of the walk.

[Matt Gourley]

Now people have said that before.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh yeah, that cock of the walk.

[Matt Gourley]

Is a. Oh, that's Cock. The rooster cock or cock like dick cock?

[Conan O'Brien]

No, no, no. Not Jesus. Why do you always have to drag everything out on the gutter?

[Matt Gourley]

It's my me. I don't always do that. I'm just saying. You say cock. When I hear cock, it's the first thing I think of is a penis. I'm sorry.

[Conan O'Brien]

When you hear a light bulb, the first thing you think of is cock. Oh, God. What is that, marzipan? Did someone say cock? Yeah.

[Matt Gourley]

Rap, please.

[Conan O'Brien]

No, I want to do more of these.

[Matt Gourley]

Cock it up.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm Tony's therapist. I'm going to hold some images up to you. Here's one. Cock. Here's another one. Dick. Here's one. Screwed.

[Matt Gourley]

Most of the people who heard him say cock of the walk thought what I thought.

[Conan O'Brien]

I don't know. No, I don't think so. I don't think so. No, no. No one here.

[Matt Gourley]

Everybody okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, Yeah. I just love. You got burned. You got burned.

[Matt Gourley]

I thought Eduardo would be on my side, but I.

[Conan O'Brien]

When I say I'm wearing a turtleneck Dickie, do you think dick.

[Matt Gourley]

What are you. What is a turtleneck Dickie?

[Conan O'Brien]

A turtleneck Dickie is like a. I've.

[Matt Gourley]

Never heard of that.

[Conan O'Brien]

It looks like you're wearing a turtleneck, but you're not and only goes this far and you put it under your. We'll cut this part. It's not as good as what we just had. Cockaroo.

[Matt Gourley]

Okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

We always elevate, and then we get back into the mud, and then we actually. We never elevate. I know.

[Matt Gourley]

What are you. What.

[Conan O'Brien]

All right, let's get into it.

[Matt Gourley]

What cast do you think you're on? The rest is history in the dirt.

[Conan O'Brien]

My guest today is an actor who has starred in movies like. Oh, I love it in his credits. It doesn't say the one movie that Sona loves. My guest today is an actor who has starred in movies like no country for Old Men and Endgame and the Goonies. Doesn't say that.

[Sona Movsesian]

Thrash him.

[Matt Gourley]

Well, you don't have to read what it says. You could say the Goonies, too.

[Conan O'Brien]

Nope, doesn't say it here. He now has a new memoir titled, and guess what. I've read this book and it is beautiful and is very powerful. I can't say enough good about this book. I'm being very sincere. It's a lovely testament. This gentleman has written about his very unusual life. It's very cool. It's titled from under the Truck. I'm thrilled he's here today from the Goonies. Josh Brolin, Welcome. I think you're excited to see me.

[Josh Brolin]

I am excited. I'm really excited. The first time I went on your show was for flirting with disaster.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yep.

[Josh Brolin]

And I think you know which. I'm much less nervous now. I still get nervous, but not really. I don't care as much now.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

But back then I told a story about how my dad's so good looking that I told him I wanted to have sex with him or something like that, and nobody got it. I still think it's funny.

[Conan O'Brien]

It is funny.

[Josh Brolin]

It is funny because it's your dad and like, course you don't want to have sex with your dad. And somebody that's that good looking even the son would want to have sex with them. Every angle I look at it from, it's still funny. And literally you and I were like. You went and I looked out and everybody was like. Yeah, like nothing.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, it was a different time. It was different. It was a different time. And you were way ahead of the curve. That wasn't on you. That was on that audience that night. It was a bad audience. I remember them.

[Josh Brolin]

Or they didn't give a fuck what I had to say.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm going to start because I have to say this right away. And I address my cohorts here. Mr. Brolin here. Josh Brolin has written a book. And I told him this backstage, and I want to say it right here, right now. Many celebrities write a book or known people write a book and you look at it and you go, okay, they cranked this out. This is a beautiful book. This is a really beautiful book. What are you doing?

[Josh Brolin]

I'm just video recording it.

[Conan O'Brien]

We're recording this the whole time.

[Sona Movsesian]

He has a YouTube channel, but you're not.

[Josh Brolin]

No, I don't. I won't use this for anybody other than my own.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay, There you go. This is a gorgeous book and it's really powerful and it is brilliantly written. And I read this thing and I thought there was so much in it that I did not know about you. It's fantastic. It's great. And it's called Josh A Memoir from under the Truck. I didn't know all this stuff about you. You jump around in time. You talk a lot about the different experiences you had on different projects. And there's a lot to talk about here. But the thread that runs through this whole thing is your mom, and it is very powerful stuff, man. Is she a character?

[Josh Brolin]

She is a character. She was a character, is a character, continues to be a Character.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's so interesting because one of my favorite movies of all time, and I think I've probably told you this hundreds of times ad nauseam, but no country for Old Men is one of my all time favorite movies. And your performance in it and Javier's performance in it, incredible. But I watched that movie again and again and again and marvel at it. This. What I never realized is that your character, Llewellyn is much closer to you and the way you grew up than I ever knew, which is fascinating.

[Josh Brolin]

In what way? What did he mean?

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, you grow up, I mean.

[Josh Brolin]

Oh, you mean ranch and all that kind of stuff. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

First of all, your life, and there's so many passages in this book where you're taking care of animals, you're living on a ranch, you're living in this incredibly rural environment. You've got this life that was much manlier than anything I've ever experienced. I'm sorry. I had a butterfly net. Occasionally I'd go outside with my butterfly net and then my mother would say, get back inside, the sun's out. So. But your mom. Let's talk about your mom, because she runs through this book and she died very Tragically, I believe 1995 is when you lost your mom. But she jumps off the page and it's very unconventional. She's not a conventional mom in any way. You guys are drinking buddies pretty much at an early age.

[Josh Brolin]

I think I say it in one of the. If you, you know, chapters, if you will, which we decided at the. Toward the tail end of this to put in chapters to make it followable or just, you know, stories that you could kind of note and go back to. But there's one that said I was. I can't remember exactly what it says, but it says something like, I was created in her kind of likeness to be a drinker. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. So it was like. It was kind of like a surrogate husband, so to speak. My dad was, you know, extremely. They got married in 12 days. After seven days, I think after five. No, it was seven days. They sat down, they had a scorpion drink, one of those massive cups between them. My dad was reeling from a recent breakup, and my mom, with her voice, that Texan voice, they were, you know, drinking it up. And she looked up and she goes, well. And my dad's like, yeah. And he. She goes, are we. We gonna do it or what? He was like, do what? And she said, get married. Are we gonna just. Are we gonna do it or what? And he Got so kind of, you know, perplexed and confused and nervous that he just said, yeah, I guess. And she said, okay. And she started planning it at that moment.

[Conan O'Brien]

Wow.

[Josh Brolin]

And five days later, they were married.

[Conan O'Brien]

Of course, your dad, very well known actor, James Brolin.

[Josh Brolin]

Super handsome.

[Conan O'Brien]

Super handsome. I mean, I'd fuck him.

[Josh Brolin]

Yes.

[Conan O'Brien]

Now it's full circle.

[Josh Brolin]

Full circle.

[Conan O'Brien]

I have Braggart. You're not supposed to talk about it.

[Josh Brolin]

You said it was okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

But it's interesting because we live in this era where people talk about Nepo and. Oh, you're the child.

[Josh Brolin]

That's like the new thing.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, that's the new thing. I'm saying that, oh, you're the child of celebrity. You read this book, your dad, and.

[Josh Brolin]

You'Re like, where the fuck is the celebrity?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah. Your dad is not.

[Josh Brolin]

That's kind of the point.

[Conan O'Brien]

Your dad kind of is not really in the picture that much. He's very peripheral. Your mom, you say, my childhood was on a leash of the whim to my mother. And that you were sort of told to be. You're gonna be the man of the house, even though you're a little kid.

[Josh Brolin]

And didn't mad at her. Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And then you live this life that is completely different. I mean, you are on a ranch. There's like 22s, rifles, there's. I mean, the life you're living is not that of a kid who's growing up in any kind of privilege.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah, but that's the whole thing. And that's the thing that, you know, either people are really interested in or they're not interested in. To me, I know that I've fought the idea of celebrity my whole life. Even though I didn't grow up in la, everybody thinks I grew up in Malibu. I didn't grow up in Malibu. And then you imagine what happens on a set, and you think it's this perpetual red carpet and you're just waving literally your entire life.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yep.

[Josh Brolin]

Do you know what I mean? There is a perception of. I was just on the phone with my lit agent, Kimberly Witherspoon, this morning, and I was like, I'm spinning. I'm spinning. Like you saw me. I felt it get uncomfortable when you said those nice things about the book. I got teary. This means the world to me because it's me being naked about the realities of the life that I've lived and the life of a lot of other celebrities that I know. You know, there's no. And it's not that it's looking for compassion. It's not. But there's no compassion in that. There's no. Just like, oh, you, you guys have the same problems. No, you don't. You live in a bubble. You all live in under the same apartment complex and you just go, what, what, what are you thinking?

[Conan O'Brien]

Right, right.

[Josh Brolin]

What are you thinking? What about the life of this kind of unconventional life of this guy who was germinated unbeknownst to anybody, that it was going to be this. Into an artist who just found creativity as an outlet, got attached to it, the self destructive part of him grew and grew and grew with it and then somehow through having kids and all that, found his way out of the self destruction.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I read this book and I thought it's kind of a miracle you're alive because there's so many parts of this book where your drinking is out of control and you almost, it feels like you have a death wish at times. Same thing with your mom for sure. And you read these accounts, which again are so beautifully written, and then you intersperse that by jumping around with. You show up on the set to shoot the Goonies and so there's this crazy world that you're living in where you feel like, oh, he's a ranch hand. He's not even a ranch hand. He's someone who has to work his way up to being a ranch hand. That's how it feels sometimes. And then suddenly you time travel, you're on the set of the Goonies and you feel like, this is weird. I don't know what this is, this make believe world that I'm in. This seems kind of fun, but, but.

[Josh Brolin]

Not, not even close to as surreal as my world.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes, yes, your world is much more surreal, totally than showing up and making the Goonies with Steven Spielberg and Richard Donner, like with. And by the way, I have to step outside this conversation for one second and tell you that Sonoma Session's Citizen Kane is the Goonies. And I witnessed this firsthand because this is true for an entire generation. I shoot this travel show and I was not long ago in New Zealand. And I'm in New Zealand and I see a kind of a familiar face way across the way in this strange hotel we're in. And she starts coming closer to me and she goes, conan, hi. And I go, hi. I can't see quite who it is. And she gets closer and I realize, oh, it's Martha Plimpton.

[Josh Brolin]

No way.

[Conan O'Brien]

Martha Plimpton's in New Zealand. She's there to shoot something. She sits at our table Holds Court is lovely. Fantastic. Really funny. My crew is all women. Three women, two cameras and sound. They are shaking, Shaking. And I'm.

[Josh Brolin]

Because she's in the car.

[Conan O'Brien]

And the thing is, I kept thinking, yeah, Martha Plimpton, she's great. But shaking, you know? You never shook when you met me. Why are they shaking? You guys have a. Is there a tremor going around? And at the end of the night, they went, can we just. Please, please, please, please, Martha, can we just please get a picture with you? And then after they get the picture, they're practically crying and hugging each other. That they got. And I said to them, what? And they said, the Goonies?

[Matt Gourley]

Yep.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, yeah. Matt, too. It's not just me.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's true.

[Sona Movsesian]

Formative.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

And you do whole movie of my life. You do whole monologues to me about Troy's bucket.

[Matt Gourley]

Yes, of course. It's the most inspirational monologue ever.

[Conan O'Brien]

There have been times. Cause Sona's been with me for a long time, and there have been times where I've been. And we've been all over the place. And I'm not kidding, there were times where I was on tour, and it was right after the Tonight show fiasco, and I'm down and out, and I'm like, man, I gotta salvage my career. And you would say, it's their time. You would say, conan, it's their time up there. It's your time. And I went, what are you talking about?

[Josh Brolin]

And she went, it's not your time.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's our time. It's our time. And I'm like, sona, what is this? And everyone around her was like, she's right. It's Troy's bucket. And I'm like, what the fuck are you people talking about? I'm 87 years old.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, my God.

[Josh Brolin]

Honestly, it's like if you did a Freud quote, if you did some other quote, you'd be like, wow. Yeah, but because it's the Goonies, it has this reference of, like, cute.

[Conan O'Brien]

No, but for a whole generation. It is.

[Josh Brolin]

Wow. No, no, no, no, dude. For like, three generations. I don't know how many. How old are you? My age.

[Conan O'Brien]

I am 98 years old.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah, I know. So you are. We're the same age.

[Conan O'Brien]

I fought in World War II.

[Josh Brolin]

How did you.

[Conan O'Brien]

I am 61.

[Josh Brolin]

You're 61?

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm older. Okay, well.

[Josh Brolin]

But that's.

[Conan O'Brien]

Rub it in.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah. 61. You look so good.

[Conan O'Brien]

Thank you. I've had a ton of work done.

[Josh Brolin]

Have you.

[Conan O'Brien]

Do you get filler? Honestly, I get no filler.

[Josh Brolin]

I do.

[Conan O'Brien]

And you know what? Really?

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah. My lips.

[Sona Movsesian]

No.

[Josh Brolin]

I love how he's just learning.

[Matt Gourley]

We all see those.

[Sona Movsesian]

See those guys?

[Josh Brolin]

Can you imagine somebody like me getting filler?

[Conan O'Brien]

No.

[Sona Movsesian]

As he sits cross legged on the chair. By the way, look at this. This is great.

[Matt Gourley]

We all just stared at you.

[Conan O'Brien]

Josh. You know what's amazing? No one would ever believe that I would get filler in my lips because I have no lips. My mouth is a slit. It's a gash in my face.

[Matt Gourley]

You do have great cheekbones.

[Josh Brolin]

You do have great cheekbones. And you would look amazing with bigger lips. I suggest.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm going to do it. You know what I should do?

[Josh Brolin]

I don't think it's a bad thing. I know there can be reactions, but even you, because you have no lips, if it reacted poorly, it would still look good.

[Conan O'Brien]

So even if I got a bad swelling, it would give me something.

[Josh Brolin]

So mean.

[Conan O'Brien]

Josh, you could have said something like, no, no, you look fine. But you went, no. Eat. No.

[Josh Brolin]

Because everybody says this. This is not a perpetual red carpet.

[Conan O'Brien]

I want.

[Josh Brolin]

You are not a fucking celebrity.

[Conan O'Brien]

God damn it. I thought this was my time that was there.

[Josh Brolin]

You just brought it around.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[Josh Brolin]

This is not their time. This is.

[Matt Gourley]

It's our time down here.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm gonna say.

[Josh Brolin]

I remember voice control. I remember Steve Antin said. What was it? What was Cary's name? Andy.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, Andy.

[Josh Brolin]

Like, it's the worst voice control of any actor. Until I did my next movie, which was Thrashin. That. When I was in the premiere and I saw that movie. A movie that I don't talk shit about anymore, but I did for years when I saw. And I. My. My name was Chrissy that I yelled out and she walked out of my trailer and I go, chrissy. And I was like, oh, my God, you suck so bad. You're actually hurting people. Acting is supposed to bring joy and you're bringing.

[Conan O'Brien]

Have you met All Modern yet, Sona? No.

[Matt Gourley]

I do.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, you two have got to get together. You would love each other.

[Matt Gourley]

Would we?

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Grab a mochaccino talk. No. All Modern. Let me explain. Whether your style is Scandinavian inspired or it's more iconic mid century modern, which is. I've been to your house. You guys are more mid century.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah, we are. We are. We are.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. Or pared down minimalism. All Modern has the best of modern furniture and decor all in one place. I'm sick of like, well, I want to look at some modern furniture. Well, there are nine types you have.

[Josh Brolin]

To go to nine Stores.

[Conan O'Brien]

Why am I even talking to that guy?

[Matt Gourley]

I don't know that guy. This guy doesn't sound cool at all.

[Conan O'Brien]

I hate that guy. Yeah, you can get them all in one place at all. Modern. Every design is hand vetted for quality by their team of experts who can be sure to last through moves and milestones ahead. Not to mention fast and free shipping. Yep. That means you can upgrade your space in days, not weeks. Plus, right now, you'll save big on every style of modern with Black Friday deals all month long on cozy living room furniture, holiday hosting, must haves and more. That's modern made simple. Shop [e-mail] or visit them in store in Linfield and Dedham, Massachusetts. Or in Austin, Texas. Sona, when you take a big trip with the family, and I know that you love to travel and your kids are getting old enough now where they like to travel, too.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah, that's true.

[Conan O'Brien]

Who looks after the house?

[Matt Gourley]

That's the thing. Nobody. And so I've actually been toying with the idea of maybe, you know, putting my house up on Airbnb, making some extra cash, having someone there.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's like you're hosting people.

[Matt Gourley]

Exactly.

[Conan O'Brien]

It's like you're getting paid to travel. You can use the money that you get from putting your house up on Airbnb to help finance your trip.

[Matt Gourley]

Exactly. And you know what? There's people there that are looking after my relics.

[Conan O'Brien]

You have a lot of people don't know this, but Sona has a lot of ancient Greek relics. Etruscan relics.

[Matt Gourley]

Yes, exactly.

[Conan O'Brien]

You have a lot of sculpture from the Assyrian empire. Sona has billions and billions of dollars worth of ancient, ancient artifacts that have never even been looked at by archeologists.

[Matt Gourley]

They should all be in a museum.

[Conan O'Brien]

They really should be.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

But it's nice when you're away. Your home could be an Airbnb, and that's something to keep in mind. So your home, AKA your future Airbnb, might be worth more than you think. Find out how [e-mail] host. As a B2B marketer, you know how noisy the ad space can be, don't you, Sona?

[Matt Gourley]

So many ads all over the place.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. If your message isn't targeted to the right audience, it just disappears into all that noise. Yeah, it's like dropping a coin down a fountain. You never hear that splash.

[Matt Gourley]

Down a fountain or a well.

[Conan O'Brien]

Shut up. With LinkedIn ads, you can precisely reach the professionals who are more likely to find your ad relevant. I wish someone would find me relevant. With LinkedIn's targeting capabilities, you can reach them by job title, industry, company and more. You'll have direct access to and building relationships with decision makers. A billion members. What? 130 million senior level executives. 10 million C level executives. Stand out with LinkedIn ads and start converting your B2B business into high quality leads today. They'll even give you a $100 credit on your next campaign. Go to LinkedIn.com TeamCoco to claim your credit. That's LinkedIn.com TeamCoco terms and conditions apply. LinkedIn the place to be. To be. I always go back to the one in Wall Street.

[Josh Brolin]

What?

[Conan O'Brien]

Charlie Sheen is on an elevator with his father and Martin Sheen. They're having this big argument and Martin Sheen's line is, I don't measure a man' by the size of his wallet. Is what he's supposed to yell at him. I adore Martin Sheen. He's one of my all time favorites and a lovely man. But his line reading was, at least I don't measure a man's worth by the size of his wallet.

[Josh Brolin]

It was a Pacino moment.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, it's the.

[Sona Movsesian]

Give me all you got.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. And that's what it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

That's what it is.

[Conan O'Brien]

But anyway, every actor has those.

[Josh Brolin]

By the way, have you heard that story? Give me all you got. And he was like, you know, we had planned that he was on cocaine.

[Sona Movsesian]

Yes.

[Josh Brolin]

And you go, thank God that wasn't just you.

[Sona Movsesian]

Oh, I think retroactively put in to make sense of what.

[Conan O'Brien]

And explain this. Explain for people who don't know. Yeah.

[Sona Movsesian]

There's a scene in Heat where he's interrogating a source. But the best part is he's clearly improvising because when he says, get the hell you got the other guy, the look on his face is so real, like he's looking to Michael Mann going, are we going to use this?

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right.

[Josh Brolin]

You know what you do when you get to that point? I've been to that, that place. Have been in that place. And you do it twice. Yeah, give me all you got. Give me all you got. It's like, please cut. That's what he's saying, please cut the film. Don't let this happen. I'm an actor, I can't stop. And he's one of my.

[Conan O'Brien]

I think in the same. I think in the same one, he says, she's got a great ass.

[Josh Brolin]

That's what I mean. And then he slaps the table.

[Conan O'Brien]

And he slaps the table. And the thing Is the thing about Pacino, who sat in that chair, had.

[Sona Movsesian]

A great ass and.

[Conan O'Brien]

Had a great ass. He said, yay.

[Matt Gourley]

Yes.

[Josh Brolin]

One of the greats.

[Conan O'Brien]

He is one of the greats. I mean, God, but he can get away with anything. Anything. Because he's Al Pacino.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Except that.

[Josh Brolin]

Except that. That was wrong. That was a perfect movie. Yeah. And he fucked it up. But. Or Michael Mann fucked it up. And I'm saying that from a. From a fellow actor. I've spoken with him. Not that I told him, hey, why'd you fuck up? He. But he's one of the great. I mean, Dog Day Afternoon to me, is like one of the greatest films of all time that I've probably seen 30 times. And it's just. I mean, truly one of the greatest. When I heard him back. I was on a plane and I heard him back there, whatever. He was like Tom Waits version of this. And I couldn't. I. It's one of the few people I couldn't come up to. I was so in awe. And he came up to me and he said, I'm a big fan. And I was like, wow.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

That's a moment I'll never forget.

[Conan O'Brien]

He's. He's the Godfather.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah. Did he say he was a fan of yours?

[Conan O'Brien]

No, not a fan. He went out of.

[Sona Movsesian]

Likes you.

[Conan O'Brien]

He went way out of his way to say not a fan. No, no. He was very sweet to me, and I've run into him a couple of times, and he has been enormously kind and sweet to me.

[Josh Brolin]

But can we just revisit this really quick before you move on? And I know I say this every time I see you, but I used to see you on the street in New York. You know, this Upper west side. Upper west side. But not in the park. Park. The Upper west side. I would see you on the street, and you would always avoid me. And that's the truth. Yeah, you would always avoid. You'd always look at me. You'd have your dogs. Yeah, I was totally one dog. One dog?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

Oh, I imagined.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I had a paper machine. I wanted people to think I had two dogs, really. So I had a real dog, and then I had a paper mache dog.

[Josh Brolin]

But I do. I always remember recognizing you, and then you would look up, and then basically it was your version of Stay away from me.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was very anti Goonie back then.

[Josh Brolin]

No, you didn't know I was from the Goonies. You just thought I was some weird street urchin that needed cocaine. And you Looked like a dealer.

[Conan O'Brien]

You were swinging a hatchet.

[Matt Gourley]

I will say that he looked like a dealer.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah. No, I'm just saying that's probably what I thought then.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

Hey, man, you holding? You holding? Aren't you Conan O'Brien, man? No. Okay.

[Conan O'Brien]

As everyone will tell you, I'm notoriously unfriendly when you meet me on the street. Notoriously. But, yeah, I dipped out for that Goonies moment. We have another connection, which is because you mention this a lot in your book and you tell this great story, but the set where we shot our show, our TBS show for 10 years, was the set where they shot the Goonies on Warner Brothers.

[Josh Brolin]

Oh, really?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[Josh Brolin]

No way.

[Conan O'Brien]

And so I know you tell this great story where the director, Donner, and I think Spielberg, they wanted it to be a surprise when you guys come out of the water and see the ship for the first time. So they had you all go underwater with your eyes closed backwards and then turn underwater with an underwater speaker that.

[Josh Brolin]

Will tell you when to come up.

[Conan O'Brien]

When to come up. And they wanted your honest reactions to seeing this massive galleon that they had built for the first time. And speak about screwing things up. What did you do?

[Josh Brolin]

I came up. They said, go. And I heard everybody else coming up, so I was late. So I wasn't thinking. I came up, I looked at it. I turned around, I looked at it, and I went, fuck. And Donner goes, what? I go, sorry, sorry. He goes, go back under. Go back under.

[Conan O'Brien]

This is a G movie. And also, you can't do that again. You can't see it for the first time again.

[Josh Brolin]

No, that's what I'm saying. Go back under. I ruined the whole thing. And again, when we go back and talking about this book, is that you go, oh, we're hiring Jim Brolin's son or whatever, he auditioned six times. And I was. I was right for that part. I look at it objectively and I go, I was right. I look like a jock. I look like the Sean Astin. But the truth of the matter is, they were hiring a sito rat. They were hiring a guy who was already doing. Had done a lot. I'd already been to jail two times. So when I go up and say, fuck, it's organic. It's not like, oh, my God.

[Conan O'Brien]

Fuck, that's so big.

[Josh Brolin]

It's so hard being an actor's son. Anyway, I was going to show you. I keep reaching for this, and I'm going to show you. Keep talking and I'll show you.

[Conan O'Brien]

All right, well, anyway, this is a podcast. See? And I'll just keep talking while the guy I'm interviewing isn't paying attention. That's not how this works. What am I supposed to do?

[Josh Brolin]

This is. I don't know. This is a picture of me. It's my mother. JB is a kid. It's me in my crib with a mountain lion.

[Sona Movsesian]

Holy.

[Josh Brolin]

There you go.

[Conan O'Brien]

Let me see. Oh, my God. That is.

[Josh Brolin]

And it's not a cub. It is an adolescent mountain lion. And that's. That's.

[Conan O'Brien]

Is that your mom putting it in?

[Josh Brolin]

That's my mom taking the picture. Look at the camera. I'm like. I'm not. I'm not taking my eyes off the mountain line. I'm not looking at the camera.

[Sona Movsesian]

Like you and Melanie Griffith. Didn't hurt Tippy.

[Conan O'Brien]

Ced.

[Josh Brolin]

They knew each other. They did know each other.

[Sona Movsesian]

They grew up on a. On a, like, farm with all these lions and everything.

[Josh Brolin]

There's a. And if you look at the face, it will tell you everything. Not that I was beaten. That's what it is.

[Conan O'Brien]

Growing up with wild animals, because you're constantly getting.

[Josh Brolin]

That's it.

[Conan O'Brien]

Clawed in the face. You're mold, but also there.

[Josh Brolin]

Birth bites. My mom clawed.

[Conan O'Brien]

What's interesting about this Love bites. Anyway, Josh, in the book, you jump between these sort of iconic Hollywood experiences where it's you and Sean Penn and you're meeting Robert De Niro for the first time, and you had this great thing. You're such a wise. You've never met De Niro before. He sits down at the table and you say, I don't mean to be.

[Josh Brolin]

It's like even joking around with you, like, I'm in this thing right now. It's like, I don't mean to be mean. There's, like, people that I like, Colbert, you. You know, where I get along with really well. And then I. I know I do that thing, which is true.

[Conan O'Brien]

No, but I.

[Josh Brolin]

It's just what I grew up with. We all kind of poke each other.

[Conan O'Brien]

Trust me. I.

[Josh Brolin]

You know what I mean?

[Conan O'Brien]

I drink from that well exclusively. I. It's called growing up with brothers and sisters. And we're always constantly cuffing each other, and all we do is talk shit at each other around here.

[Josh Brolin]

That's family to me. That's family. Not everybody gets that. That's why when to Italy, everybody's like that. And I was like, oh, wow, I was just born in the wrong country.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

Like, everybody. Even the grandmother is like, what the fuck are you looking at? And I'm like, what?

[Conan O'Brien]

But what's funny is you have these. You have these. You jump.

[Josh Brolin]

Actively trying to ruin my career.

[Conan O'Brien]

You jump. You jump from these moments where you're telling really funny stories about these. You know, like hanging out with Brando and Travolta and, like, these great stories. But then the next chapter, you'll jump back in time and it's you. It's four in the morning and it's your job to feed, like, 75 horses because there's a.

[Josh Brolin]

There's connective tissue there somewhere. And it's not linear, because what is linear? It's. You know, I was saying. I'm saying this this morning. I was saying the whole point of the book is that it's. It's this kind of. It's a collective. Like. I love the idea of groups of people being able to lean on each other. And. And. And if it's. If, you know, you don't have the same beliefs. It's a messy fucking life, man. It's all over the place. It's all made up this whole idea of trajectory. And, like, I did the Goonies, and then I did Thrash, and. And then I worked with. You know. Then I did highway to Heaven with. You know, it's like, yeah, okay, but what were you thinking? What were you. This. What was the messiness? How did you become who you are at this point? And then. You know what I mean, it's way more interesting to me to get into the nonlinear kind of reactions off. You have De Niro in front of you, and you look at, like. I don't. I'm sure it was the wine, but I was like, look at your face, man. And he goes, what? And I was like, you just got a fucking face. Look at your face. Has anybody ever told you, like, have you ever thought about. I know you run a motel or a hotel or whatever it is, but you thought about acting.

[Conan O'Brien]

Now, did he laugh?

[Josh Brolin]

No. And then I hear Sean go, dude, shut the fuck up. No, he didn't laugh, but he was like, what?

[Conan O'Brien]

You talking to me?

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

Now it's like your face, the way you're sitting in that chair, is just so kind of a celebrity.

[Conan O'Brien]

But why not?

[Josh Brolin]

We're in this. You said it before, and it's like. And I don't mean to make it morbid or anything, but you said, death wish. It was never a death wish. I never had a death wish. It was a vivid wish.

[Conan O'Brien]

Right.

[Josh Brolin]

I just wanted things. Maybe it was the LSD I took at 13. I don't know. But it was like I just wanted my mom was that she just wanted it heightened.

[Conan O'Brien]

You talk about these experiences where you would go with your mom, you're a kid, she would go to a restaurant and it's just the two of you. And then she would start making her move to connect with a guy there. And you knew what was happening and you'd go out in the parking lot and go look for rattlesnakes by yourself while your mom cozied up with someone.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah, but she wasn't, you know, she wasn't. And I would say this, if she was, she wasn't particularly sexual. Again, it was more about whatever the event was. Like we went into a restaurant. It was very rare. My mom didn't end up in the kitchen.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[Josh Brolin]

You know, and my mom cooked every day. Whether there was somebody on the ranch or not, she cooked every day and then she'd put it on somebody's fence post. So she cooked all the time. And I have all those recipes. I have a whole wall full of recipes that she. That are all handwritten and all that. So it's very cool. But the truth of the matter is that she was a big drinker. She would go out, she was loud, she was masculine. If she wanted to kiss you, you, there's nothing that would stop her from doing that. She would grab you, she would pull her you across the table and then she'd give you a kiss. And then something else would come up, you know?

[Conan O'Brien]

Right.

[Josh Brolin]

Somebody would bark and then she'd look over and you know what I mean? It was like a high pitched whistle dog thing. She just wanted to be in the nucleus of everything, of what was most heightened and most interesting without knowing why. And she was always, she was always like that. She would tell me that her parents were super sweet parents, teachers, really smart. Corpus Christi, Texas. And that she was always sneaking out of the house. She was always causing trouble. She always had animals in her garage that she was hiding. She was just that in, in, in an organic way. And she. And I don't have it in the book. You know, she ended up. She ran away from home when she was 19. The first people she met were Clint and Maggie Eastwood. Right. So that's who before Clint did Rawhide or any of that. They kind of took her under their wing. She hung out in Hollywood. She grew up Baptist, very strict. She started sleeping all these guys, married men and all that. She kind of went crazy, took a bunch of pills, got in a car, started hitting a bunch of parked cars, ended up in Camarillo State Hospital. Three and a half week. They assessed her. Three and a half weeks later, they said, look, she's not crazy. She just had a moment. They go to Camario State Hospital to pick her up, and she doesn't want to leave. She goes, I like it here. It's fun. And she had become friends with a lady. I mean, again, this is super morbid. But a lady who had hacked up her whole family and hadn't talked for 12, 12 years. And I'm. I can see it right now, probably sat next to her and said, I don't understand why you're not talking. Do you not talk at all? Do you have a voice or do you have this? And. And the girl finally said, candy. And it was like a whole breakthrough.

[Conan O'Brien]

So your mom broke through this woman who wasn't talking to Ann out of.

[Josh Brolin]

Total annoyance, I'm sure.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah. Would you please shut up and I'll tell you exactly who I hacked and why?

[Josh Brolin]

But, you know, I don't tell that story because there's no need to tell that story because it has that in the fabric of each story. And you can see that for me, in my life, it's hard to tell those stories when you're promoting a book, because who the fuck wants to read about that? But at the same time, you go, that's normal, man. That's normal for us.

[Conan O'Brien]

What you clearly inherited from your mom, as you said, is this need that you wanted. And it's in all these stories you tell throughout your childhood and through a chunk of your adulthood. You need the dials turned up all the way. You need that. That's just something that you insist upon. And so if that means whatever that means, whatever that means, what you're going to do.

[Josh Brolin]

And then you go, why would I be an actor? I had no interest in being an actor. Like my dad. My dad's profession didn't interest me in the least. There was nothing that kind of drew me toward, like, what do you do? And, wow, you do the thing. And it was nothing. And I did a. I took a theater class because there was like underwater basket weaving in theater. And I was like, well, let's do the theater. And this woman had me get up on stage. I was the first one she chose. Get up on stage. Create a character, any character you want. How does he look? How does he feel? Where is he from? How does he. This. Now, as the house, we're going to ask you questions and you answer as the character. And as I was. I was like a balding Middle aged guy from Brooklyn or something. I don't know. Whatever I came up with in my head. And as I was answering in humor, once people started laughing at my answers, it just clicked. I was like, this is it. This is heightened. This is. Is me able to resort to my imagination, which is far more interesting than my reality.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, I completely relate to being a kid, making people laugh. And when people describe, oh, the first time I tried a drug and I realized that's who I want to be that person. That's how I felt when, oh, these kids at The Baldwin School, K through 3 school, are laughing at some nonsense I'm doing. And I'm like, what is this?

[Josh Brolin]

What is this?

[Conan O'Brien]

I got to have more of this. Yeah. And I don't care who I hurt. There's a lot of beauty in the book. There's a lot of darkness in the book. You grew up with this group, this pack of kids. And there's one quote that I circled. The group of guys I grew up with, 37 of them are dead.

[Josh Brolin]

36.

[Conan O'Brien]

I got some bad news for you. I just got a word.

[Josh Brolin]

You actually just did.

[Conan O'Brien]

I just got word five minutes ago.

[Sona Movsesian]

And it's you.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, no, it's not you, but it's your friend Spencer and it was totally his.

[Josh Brolin]

See, now your family. And now your family.

[Conan O'Brien]

It was a ballooning accident.

[Josh Brolin]

I appreciate you.

[Conan O'Brien]

No, okay. What said. I thought it said 37, but. Okay, 36.

[Josh Brolin]

36.

[Conan O'Brien]

But that is.

[Josh Brolin]

And there's, by the way, still people that when I talk about it, they go, hey, tell Brolin I'm not fucking dead, man. You know what I mean?

[Conan O'Brien]

You're just laying low.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah, it was the punk rock. It was punk rock. It was the heroin epidemic. It was all that. A lot of people died.

[Conan O'Brien]

This stuck out to me. You were given your first motorcycle when you were four years old.

[Josh Brolin]

Three and a half.

[Conan O'Brien]

I got bad news for you. No, I'm kidding. Your birth certificate is wrong. You were four. I want this to be a recurring.

[Josh Brolin]

I love how you're rewriting my book.

[Conan O'Brien]

I want this to be a recurring thing where every time Josh corrects me, I got bad news for you.

[Josh Brolin]

And by the way, you get mad and you shoot back.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, okay. Three and a half. And you get a motorcycle.

[Josh Brolin]

Three and a half. An Indian.

[Conan O'Brien]

Why are you still here?

[Josh Brolin]

Indian 20 and Indian 12. Indian 20. I got. I was three and a half. And then two weeks later, I had him take off the training wheels, as you see in my face. And all those sanctioned this. Who? My dad. My dad, dad. My dad, who doesn't ride motorcycles anymore and was never very good. I, he, he, he fell at one point and really up his ankle and, and yeah, but I, I, I rode my whole life. I raced dirt bikes. I got my 80s and I got, and that, that's where I was spoiled. My dad always got me a motorcycle. So I had probably five different motorcycles.

[Conan O'Brien]

And you've done some crazy rides like through New Zealand.

[Josh Brolin]

Well, then when I was 19, then I got into the kind of Harley thing. And then, and then from 19 on. So however many that years, that is 19 to 56. Right. I ride with a group of guys now and we go 1200 mile poles and we go to chopper shows and stuff like that. I have a 1937 Knucklehead. 1968 Shovel Head, 1956 Pan Head, 1947 Knucklehead.

[Conan O'Brien]

Can I ask a very nerdy. Which is, what about maintenance on those?

[Josh Brolin]

I mean, we're breaking down because we're vintage motorcycles.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes, that's right.

[Josh Brolin]

So you have to ride with people who can fix them. I'm, I'm not good, like admittedly not good. I wish I was better. But I ride Steven. You know, there's several people that we ride with that, you know, you'll see a transmission on a sidewalk. Yeah, I have full transmission and we'll.

[Conan O'Brien]

Fix it whenever I get a chance. I try to ride a vintage motorcycle and we were shooting something in Thailand and they found this absolutely gorgeous vintage. I think it was a BMW. I could be incorrect about that, but it was. And it was like from the early 50s and it was just this bike that you could drool over. I couldn't wait to get on it. I get on it and my first feeling as I'm riding is, this is fucking terrible. Meaning, Meaning the ride.

[Josh Brolin]

Oh no, I know what you mean.

[Conan O'Brien]

And also, if you don't keep the throttle just right, it's gonna conk out. The guy kept having to come out and kick it and take it apart and put it back together again in.

[Josh Brolin]

Order for you just to ride 50 FE.

[Conan O'Brien]

Just literally for 50ft for the shot. And we ended up getting the shot. And it looks amazing. But I kept thinking, this is why I. No, I mean there's, I like an automatic transmission, not an automatic.

[Josh Brolin]

When you see Hell's Angels or Mongols now and they're all on nice bikes, they're all on new bikes. I mean there's guys, real true motorcyclists that I know that have super nice bikes that look at us and say, I could never do what you do because it's too exposing. It's too, it's just. Yeah, I mean, you break down, there's no front brake, there's sometimes not a back break. You know, if you're going to throw.

[Conan O'Brien]

An anchor, you have to throw an anchor. Well, in 100 yards, I'm coming for a stop.

[Josh Brolin]

Grab me, grab me, grab me. But that's why I think even now, and my older kids can attest to this, I have a 36 year old, a 31 year old, a 6 year old and a 3 year old and my older kids. My son's a great artist and there's a lot of like electrical towers. And you go, oh, I know. That's because he was in the back of the car looking out the window. Like we stayed in motels, we stayed in that. And I do the same thing now. We make, I make it as uncomfortable as I can. We don't. This, I have an absolute like fear of living in nothing but comfort. Sorry for them, but it's just how it is.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

There's something, like I said, there's something substantial about the vintage Harley Davidson's where it's. I, I wrote about it in the book. They said, write about motorcycles. Impossible to write about motorcycles. And I wrote and I wrote and I wrote and I kept crossing shit out and finally I said, I can't do it. And the minute I said I can't do it, I started writing. And then there was some connection with my mother and being in the back of the car with my mother and then riding motorcycles now and those connections and riding through a swarm of bees and all that, and you go, that's the deal. The discomfort is the deal. If you can, if you have some resilience. I have a massive worry about a lack of resilience, even with my kids. I look at my 3 year old, my 3 year old's literally the toughest person I know. My girl, she's just, you can see it in her face. You're like, oh, you're 100% Brolin. You're going to be okay. We just got to keep you from going crazy. But there's this again. It's character. It's all the stuff that's colorful and lively that I embrace.

[Conan O'Brien]

The other thing that I used to say to my wife when our kids were little is let's remember that it's important they be bored.

[Josh Brolin]

Yes.

[Conan O'Brien]

And because the culture now and the technology is such that there's never a moment where you are bored and I remember being bored as a kid because.

[Josh Brolin]

And having to resort to your imagination.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

Who you are.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. And so I think. Do you have that with your kids, Sona?

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it takes a lot of work to just remind yourself that it's okay if they're doing nothing. And then you see them start to resort to their imagination and you realize that's what they should be doing.

[Conan O'Brien]

Do you? I mean, because I sometimes see people that just give. They give their kid the screen.

[Matt Gourley]

No.

[Conan O'Brien]

And they say, yeah, you're fine with the screen. I'm going to go off. I'll be back in six weeks.

[Matt Gourley]

No, no, no. We.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm talking about Matt Gourlay.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah. Matt does that. Not me.

[Conan O'Brien]

He also gives him a little rum.

[Sona Movsesian]

Yeah, well, that part.

[Matt Gourley]

Yeah, Well, I mean, Matt and I Both also have 3 year olds too, and it's.

[Josh Brolin]

It's twin.

[Matt Gourley]

I have twins. He has one. Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

Right, right. You have. Right. Okay.

[Matt Gourley]

Oh, we're not together.

[Josh Brolin]

No, I got it. I got. You got what?

[Conan O'Brien]

I mean, together, not together. I keep trying to get them together, which is creepy because we are together.

[Sona Movsesian]

I just won't acknowledge one of the.

[Josh Brolin]

No. I just saw you playing footsies underneath the table and I thought, there's something going on.

[Conan O'Brien]

They often just trade shoes underneath.

[Josh Brolin]

So you each have three year olds.

[Sona Movsesian]

Yeah, yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

Right.

[Sona Movsesian]

And we have a. A real pistol, too. And I know you do as well.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sona Movsesian]

It's a girl.

[Josh Brolin]

It's a girl.

[Matt Gourley]

And yours are two boys. They're twins.

[Josh Brolin]

Two. Two boys.

[Matt Gourley]

Wow. They're crazy.

[Josh Brolin]

It's great, though.

[Matt Gourley]

It is.

[Josh Brolin]

Even the irritation is great. I mean, there's time. There's. There's. There's a thing right now where they're both going through. Like. Like when you get mad, it would be great if you lived in a different house. And I'm not even getting mad. I'm just like, please don't do that. You know? And they're like, can you live in a different house? And I'm like, fuck you, man. Like, there. So I go. I looked at my 3 year old at one point and I said, is there nothing about me that intimidates you?

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

And they just stare. You know what I mean? But there's something.

[Sona Movsesian]

My daughter's so passive aggressive. You speak to her. Hey, Glenn, we're getting. And she'll go, we're listening.

[Josh Brolin]

Oh, God, that's the worst. It makes you crazy.

[Sona Movsesian]

It does. And I'm going crazy.

[Conan O'Brien]

I love that you have a little kid who stares at you With a brolin face and is like, hey, old man, keep walking. Oh yeah, keep walking, old man.

[Josh Brolin]

You don't even know the depth.

[Conan O'Brien]

I kind of do.

[Josh Brolin]

No, but I'm saying she's saying that in her mind when she looks at me. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're old now. No, we're the next generation. I'll bury you, like literally, I'll pour.

[Conan O'Brien]

The dirt on you.

[Josh Brolin]

I'm not afraid of many people in this lifetime, but my kids, definitely. My 31 year old daughter who's on tour, she just got off tour music. She was headlining all over the country. And she's one girl who I'm absolutely, utterly in love with, but who scares the shit out of me. She's the. Yeah, she's the first person in this life that actually scared me.

[Conan O'Brien]

Do you see? It's a very personal question, but do you see your mom coming through? When?

[Josh Brolin]

For sure.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah, for sure.

[Josh Brolin]

In the, in the best way though, you know, My mom was spinning, man. And my mom, what I don't write about in the book too, they go, God, your mom's like horrible.

[Conan O'Brien]

No, no, no. That is not what comes across.

[Josh Brolin]

Okay, I'm glad.

[Conan O'Brien]

Not, not at all. Your mother has her. Your mother is an absolutely fascinating character. She is the thread, she's the propulsion behind a lot of the book. She's clearly a huge propulsion for you through your life. And what you do very beautifully is you talk about her troubles, her struggles, decisions that today some people would question. But you also include a beautiful letter. She writes to you about how proud you can. There is no doubt she loves you. There's no doubt she's proud of you. There's no doubt that she's like Zorba the Greek. She has lived, living every single second. That all comes through.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah. There was a moment toward the end of her life and I found like it was an Al Anon book and I still have it. And it had her name in the, in the front that she wrote, hand wrote. And I know that there was a thing at the end she had thought of. What's that show on right now? Chimps or something like that.

[Conan O'Brien]

Oh, chimp crazy.

[Josh Brolin]

Chimp crazy. And she had thought of a show 30 years ago about like a sitcom of chimps and people and doing it like animatronically or something like that because she was into the wildlife thing and somebody took her seriously and said, I want you to develop that show. And she wasn't in the business or anything, it was just somebody that she knew and said, I want you to develop that show in a serious way. And I remember my mother crying, and she said. I said, what's the matter? And she said, I've never been taken seriously in my life. So she was a freak show.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

And she. And then you start living up to that freak show. And then, interestingly, there's a guy. I remember who it was. There was a guy who said, hey, my friend's coming. He was. He was Canadian. Canadian. And he said, my friend's coming into town. Do you want to go out? And I said, sure. And I went out, and I had done something a couple of days before, so I, like, stopped drinking for a few days. And we went out. He said, what can I get you? And I said, water's fine. And he goes, what do you mean? And I go, I just take a water. I'm not drinking tonight. And he goes, I brought my friend down from Canada, you know, I told her about you. And I go, what do you. What do you mean? And he said, you know, this, like, you're gonna have a night. I told her that you're crazy. And I was like, oh, I'm like your fucking clown, man.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Josh Brolin]

I'm like your thing. I'm like, you. You pay the $2. I have the two heads, or I have the thing. And you're gonna experience a brolin moment, a brolin night. He's gonna go to jail, and you're gonna go home and go, how crazy is that guy? Right? And then you're gonna go on with your life. That was when I started to go, oh, yeah. You know, because my mom lived a life of that. And I saw right at the end when she was taken seriously at 55, and I'm 56. And strangely enough, this book was never intended to be this book. This book happened organically. I just started writing. I'd look at my journals and I'd go, oh, that's. I remember that moment. And I start writing about it, and poorly. And then this thing formulated into this. All these stories about my mom. And you go, maybe that's. And it happened at 55. What a strange thing.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, you know, it is. I can't recommend the book enough. And again, when I picked it up, I didn't know what I'd be discovering. And my big takeaway is, you have lived for a still a young man. You have lived an incredible life. And your prose style is really striking and great and admirable. And that's something that hit me across the face, is you are a very talented writer. And you should write more as a writer.

[Josh Brolin]

You as a writer. I appreciate that very much. Seriously.

[Conan O'Brien]

Well, I. Yeah, I'm a very great writer.

[Matt Gourley]

Okay. All right.

[Conan O'Brien]

Wait. Did I go. Did I go the wrong way back on that?

[Matt Gourley]

Why can't you just make a moment normal?

[Sona Movsesian]

Just let it happen.

[Matt Gourley]

Let him come and say, I'm one of the great.

[Josh Brolin]

I'm a great, very great writer. Which, grammatically is so up.

[Sona Movsesian]

It's the worst writing possible.

[Conan O'Brien]

Me be. I'm not done. Very great writer. Oh, say thank you, Josh. Every time I've encountered you in. In my life, other than when I used to run away from you on the street.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah.

[Conan O'Brien]

I swear to God, you had a weapon. You were going through some bad at the time, but every time I've talked to you on one of my shows and today, you are a very honest person who has paid attention in life and you're sharing what you've seen with people and you're very wise and you're hilariously funny and it's a joy. So thank you so much for being here. Really.

[Josh Brolin]

Yeah. Thanks for having me.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. And I'm going to come hang with you now for a couple of days, if that's cool.

[Josh Brolin]

That's fine. Fine.

[Conan O'Brien]

I don't think.

[Josh Brolin]

Crawl into bed, brother. Crawl into bed. Snuggle up. Snuggle up.

[Adam Sachs]

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[Conan O'Brien]

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[Sona Movsesian]

Adam Sachs our a wonderful overlord here at the podcast.

[Conan O'Brien]

He's a podcast genius. He's the boy wonder. We owe him our thanks. Great debt of gratitude.

[Sona Movsesian]

That's right. He alerted me of something on Reddit and the title is Is Conan's Podcast Using the Dick, Dork and Deer Formula? I started wondering if Conan is a classic radio TV construct known as the Dick, Dork and deer formula. For those unfamiliar, this is a common structure in big morning radio shows where the dick plays the antagonist, saying the bold or jerky things. The dork is quirky or socially awkward, creating funny friction. Gorly, the deer is the heart of the show, keeping things grounded and often echoing what the audience is thinking.

[Conan O'Brien]

I have a theory. Yeah, we're using the dick, dick and dick from the three because I think it switches on and off all the time. I don't think there is a deer here. You know what's amazing is that when you hear that, if I didn't know any better, I'd say, oh, that makes sense. I'm sure there is a format for these things. People would be stunned by how little thought went into Conan O'Brien needs friend. That's true. It was Adam saying, conan, you should do a podcast. And I said, huh, well, if I do it, I better have Sona there because. Because that's just. She's in my life, she's my assistant, and we seem to be really funny together and it's a real connection. And then they said, we need a dick. And they brought Matt Gorley in.

[Sona Movsesian]

Professional dick.

[Conan O'Brien]

A professional dick.

[Matt Gourley]

You guys are both dorks and dicks.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[Matt Gourley]

You're both dork dicks.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah, yeah. Or dick dorks.

[Matt Gourley]

I like dork dick.

[Conan O'Brien]

Do corks.

[Sona Movsesian]

We're corked dicks.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[Sona Movsesian]

Ready to blow.

[Matt Gourley]

You are, though. I mean, I think we are definitely dicks.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[Matt Gourley]

I think it's.

[Conan O'Brien]

I think it's a different formula, but I think that is very interesting that that is a formula. When I think about it now, and whatever we've come up with is random. This is a Jackson Pollock painting, except it wasn't even painted by Jackson Pollock. There was a can of paint on the side of the road.

[Sona Movsesian]

It was painted by a dick.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah. A car ran over it and splorched a bunch of paint onto a can canvas. And that's what this is for. Better and clearly worse. Yeah, right. Is that now, you weren't thinking anything like that, were you? Adam. You're Adam. You're allowed to jump in. Here he comes. He's just. He's unfamiliar with the format, so he's sitting 50ft away.

[Josh Brolin]

I.

[Conan O'Brien]

Is this mic on? The headphones are not on. Okay. Wow. So you're the podcast genius. Do I speak into this tube?

[F]

No. The answer is no. I definitely would, thinking that we would. I'd never heard of that dick dork dear thing either. I can see how it makes sense. But no, that wasn't the thought. The thought was start with you. You actually said, like, you want some people around you, you need people to bounce off of. You can't just do this by yourself.

[Conan O'Brien]

I mean, I could. It'd probably be better. Oh, well, you said that you didn't bounce off. No, what I said was, I don't want it to be too good.

[Josh Brolin]

Oh.

[Conan O'Brien]

So let's make sure that son is here in Goerley. Remember, you know, like sort of if something gets too. If a nuclear reactor gets too hot, they these rods to cool it of just sort of mediocre stuff.

[Matt Gourley]

Dick dork.

[Sona Movsesian]

Yeah, real dork.

[Matt Gourley]

You're dick dorking it this time right now. Dick dork Move. You're doing a dick dork.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yes.

[Matt Gourley]

Better than you do.

[Conan O'Brien]

I'm being a dick. And I'm also explaining how a nuclear reactor works.

[F]

Well, we should give some credit to Jeff Ross, who never.

[Conan O'Brien]

And not Jeff Ross, the roast master general comic Jeff Ross. Our own Jeff Ross, my producer of 31 years.

[F]

Yes.

[Conan O'Brien]

Who 25 of them. Very capable.

[F]

He also identified the fact that you and Sona have a great thing and it's really funny. So we should have Sona there. And I had known Matt for many years at that point, worked with him for many years. And so when we said we wanted the best producer, in my mind, Matt's the best kind producer.

[Conan O'Brien]

I got confusing. You had me come into a meeting and Matt was there and we met, we got along great. And you said, well, Matt will be the producer. At the time, I thought that meant he. This isn't a bit or anything. I thought he was behind a glass case.

[Josh Brolin]

Me too.

[Conan O'Brien]

Producing it. I had no idea that he'd be in the Room with us. And when you were in the room with us and talking, I was like, oh, I was surprised for years. Hated it.

[Sona Movsesian]

Yeah, I mean, I got that sense.

[Conan O'Brien]

Just years. No, no, I'm kidding. No, I was surprised and then immediately saw, oh, this is. No, this is great. This is a triumph. This is triangulation. Because you. I'm going to take a second and be legitimately nice to you. You bring so much great stuff to the podcast and you think differently than I do. Not as quickly and not as you were so close.

[Sona Movsesian]

Not as all dear, just a little dork.

[Conan O'Brien]

Not as touched by the gods, not kissed by the gods. But you do such an amazing job. And so. But that was a complete surprise to me.

[Sona Movsesian]

Same with me, because I had no understanding that I was going to be on Mike. I was just supposed to come on and help develop the pilot. But I do remember one of the first times you engaged with me on Mike and in true service to this thing, it was a question about Star wars. And you, I think, turned to me as like, what do you think of this? And I had this answer about the prequels or something.

[Conan O'Brien]

I didn't even know. You just looked like someone. I think it was because you were dressed as a Jedi. And I mean, in a child's Jedi costume, the kind that ties around like an apron and just says Jedi on it. Not a good Jedi, not a cosplay Jedi, but an 11 year old going out on Halloween Jedi.

[F]

I did, in the back of my mind, think there was a world where Matt would speak more, but the premise was that, yeah, you weren't going to talk, you were just going to be the producer.

[Sona Movsesian]

Got there to be a microphone out there where I was kind of like, why is there.

[Conan O'Brien]

Yeah.

[F]

And I wanted there to be a microphone in front of you just in case. And.

[Conan O'Brien]

And for a while I kept, if you remember this Easily the first 20 episodes, I was hiding your microphone. You were. I'd come in early, I would, using a saw. I would saw it off.

[Matt Gourley]

I know. You didn't know. They just come off.

[Conan O'Brien]

I didn't know.

[Sona Movsesian]

Someone says, you just duct tape my mouth too.

[Conan O'Brien]

That was harder because you, you're quick. You're very quick. But then Blay comes, stumbles in. Blay is like, if you're at a campsite and you don't put your food away, Blay will show up. So Blay stumbled in and, you know, he was like, like outside the tent. And then he started saying things. We thought, okay, well, Blaze here. And then Eduardo, now, Eduardo designed the studio. Right. Eduardo is the one here who actually knows things. He actually has skill, he's trained, he's talented. And. And you actually, Matt, you have some actual real world abilities and ed editing. I don't do anything Sona. Jesus. I'm sorry, but you know the way light can't escape a black hole? I mean, just you. What? You don't do anything. And it's amazing. It's absolutely amazing.

[Matt Gourley]

Does it infuriate you a little?

[Conan O'Brien]

No, I love it.

[Matt Gourley]

Okay. I'm glad.

[Conan O'Brien]

I love it.

[Matt Gourley]

I love it. You're right.

[Sona Movsesian]

You are the best at doing nothing. Like you've turned it into not only an art.

[Conan O'Brien]

No, I'm saying you're just always been Sona. And it's amazing. Don't change a thing. Okay, but that's also an insult. Shit. Oh, and. But no, I mean, Eduardo is the one who designed the studio. Just makes this whole thing hum. You're the maestro. You deserve so much better from me. Except you have to take the occasional shot because you're a human being in the room with me. That's fair. And you have to absorb some of that hate that was crystallized in Brookline, Massachusetts in the 60s. This is going to sound corny.

[Sona Movsesian]

I can't take credit for hardly any of it. I just do what you guys allow me to do, so.

[Conan O'Brien]

You know, I hated that.

[Sona Movsesian]

He's a deer.

[Conan O'Brien]

He's the deer. That's the deer right there.

[Sona Movsesian]

There's three deers over there.

[Conan O'Brien]

I knew you're gonna give me shit for it, but I have to say.

[Matt Gourley]

Should we be more like those?

[Sona Movsesian]

Like, fuck you.

[Matt Gourley]

Okay. Oh, you're gonna do the dick part.

[Conan O'Brien]

Also, we don't have sound effects. And I think all those shows have like a wall and then fake fart noises stuff. Yeah, we use real farts here. We don't use fake fart noises. We can't afford. We couldn't figure that out.

[Matt Gourley]

We have a fart mic. Fart mic.

[Conan O'Brien]

Sona's always carbo loading before every episode.

[Matt Gourley]

Get ready.

[Conan O'Brien]

£900. Cans of beans. Give me some beans. Give me some beans. I got work. Sit. And then Eduardo's always like, you know, there is a fart sound effect. It's literally on this board. Sun is like, that sucks. Yeah, we.

[Matt Gourley]

Give me the fart mic.

[Sona Movsesian]

There's just one we have to pass around or are we individually mic.

[Conan O'Brien]

Okay, I'm calling it.

[Matt Gourley]

No, there's one fart mic.

[Sona Movsesian]

Okay.

[Matt Gourley]

And then when you feel it, you give the look.

[Josh Brolin]

Hey, pass me the fart.

[Matt Gourley]

It's fart time.

[Conan O'Brien]

Maybe we should sona to your credit, you're always ready to go when you feel it. Son is always ready to go.

[Matt Gourley]

I prepare, son.

[Conan O'Brien]

You are money in the bank.

[Matt Gourley]

Yes, I do. Yes, I am.

[Conan O'Brien]

All right, I want to wrap this up. But that's the origin story of how.

[Josh Brolin]

Oh, God.

[Conan O'Brien]

Wait a minute. That was so. That sounded like wet corduroy ripping. I know. That did not sound. What is was. That was like a lung being pulled out of someone's chest. Eduardo. Different type of farts.

[Josh Brolin]

Whoa.

[Conan O'Brien]

That far like anything I've ever heard.

[Sona Movsesian]

Before someone falling into a trash compactor.

[Conan O'Brien]

That was Aquaman farting. All right, all right. Funny farts.

[Matt Gourley]

And the wet farts are not that funny. The first the.

[Conan O'Brien]

The.

[Matt Gourley]

That one was what? That one was funny.

[Conan O'Brien]

This is. I know.

[Matt Gourley]

Comedy.

[Sona Movsesian]

We really have turned into a radio drive time show.

[Conan O'Brien]

This is. All right, well, avoid the 405. Avoid the 405, and we'll be back with the whack pack right here on Z5535.

[Matt Gourley]

Beer Baraboo.

[Conan O'Brien]

Hit the fart. Jesus, that's so pathetic. That's just a dead person. That person's been dead for six weeks.

[Matt Gourley]

But we're all laughing at the fart. Farts are always funny.

[Conan O'Brien]

No, never funny. Oh, gosh.

[Sona Movsesian]

Conan O'Brien needs a friend With Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Session and Matt Gourley produced by me, Matt Gourley executive produced by Adam Sacks, Jeff Ross and Nick Liao. Theme song by the White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples in J. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Geena Bautista and Brit Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of serious when you sign [e-mail] Conan and if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien needs a friend. Wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

[Conan O'Brien]

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