In our last episode, we explored how women and girls are often wired for safety and connection. In this episode, we turn the lens to the men in our lives, husbands, sons, brothers, and partners, and look at what’s really happening when they shut down, become defensive, or seem distant during important conversations.

These moments can feel confusing and hurtful, especially when you’re trying to connect. But underneath those reactions is often a nervous system shifting into protection mode. What looks like disconnection is often self-protection, and what feels like defensiveness is a response to perceived threat, not a lack of care.

When we begin to understand this, everything starts to shift. We take things less personally, approach conversations differently, and create space for real connection. Because when both people feel safe and understood, it becomes much easier to stay open, communicate, and move forward together.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

Understanding Men's Nervous Systems (00:00)
Common Miscommunication Patterns (02:06)
Strategies for Better Communication (06:35)
Noticing and Naming Positive Behaviors (06:51)
Impact on Daughters and Teenagers (07:23)
Reframing and Connecting Nervous Systems (08:28)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).