Steph Crowder (0:00)

Foreign. Welcome to the Courage and Clarity podcast. I'm your host, Steph Crowder. I'm a former sales training director who's helped thousands of entrepreneurs earn a living doing something they love over the past 10 years. On your journey, you'll need the courage to be bold, to take risks, and to do what looks crazy on paper. You'll also need the clarity, the brass tacks, simple strategies that actually work. And on this podcast, we deliver both in equal measure. Oh, and by the way, we've got absolutely no time for bs, gross marketing tactics or get rich quick schemes. Just sustainable business strategies for good humans with big dreams. If that sounds like you, you're in the right place. Let's go. Hello. Hello, CNC listeners. Welcome to the podcast. It's episode number 130, and today we are talking about summer. I know it's cliche that I'm about to say this, but I just, I truly, I cannot believe that summertime is upon us. I know for me, living in the, you know, I'm on, like, the border of the Midwest and the south, right? Kentucky. We're kind of Southern here. And for those of us who are in the Southern United States, we tend to go into summer a little bit earlier, I think. So maybe for some of you out there who have kids, you aren't going to be in summertime for another month. But for those of us, you know, maybe who are on a similar calendar to me, like, it's here. As I record this podcast and as this podcast is being released, we have two weeks. My kids are out next Friday. Okay? Typically, Memorial Day here in the United States, Memorial Day signals the beginning of summer. And I have learned so many lessons about summertime as a parent. So I'm talking to moms. But if you're a parent, you can be a mom, a dad. It doesn't matter. Even if you don't have kids, I think that there's. I hope you'll stick around for this episode. Maybe you're thinking of having kids one day, or maybe you have, like, just multiple responsibilities this summer. I'm going to be speaking as a mom because that's my lived experience. But I have lots of clients who are not parents but have other hats that they're wearing. I have some clients who are taking care of their aging parents or, you know, or caregivers of some other variety or, you know, you can just really make this fit to whatever you've got going on. But in particular, I want to talk to the moms. I want to talk to the Moms and the dads. Because my daughter is turning nine, I have a nine year old this week. That means I've had nine summers of being a mom and an entrepreneur. Okay? And so I've had a lot of practice. I've had a lot of fails. I've had a lot of complaining and wailing and just commiserating. Okay? And I am really, I wanted to make an episode here about how to handle being a summertime mom who is also a business owner. It doesn't have to be terrible. It doesn't have to suck. Sure, there's going to be hard parts. We'll get into all of that. But selfishly, part of the reason I wanted to make this episode is because I'm setting my own intentions. I always like to share with you all whatever I have going on in my business and in my life. I know makes excellent podcast content because it's just real. I know that if I'm going through it, a lot of you probably are as well. And so I want to share. This is going to be a practical episode, really, like my tangible tips and strategies that I have not only as a business coach, but as a parent myself. So let's get into it. Let's talk about, you know, preparing for summer as a working mom. Let's talk about choosing Joy this summer. Stay with me. I know some of you are like, right, like, that sounds kind of corny. Some of this might be a little on the corny side. And that is. Okay, Just lean into it. Okay, let's just. Let's just go for the corniness. Let's, you know, just, just bear with me because I think it's worth it to help the whole picture come together. Okay, here's the thing. If you're already dreading summer a little bit, you're not alone. Like, I fully get it. I feel the same way whenever maybe like a winter break comes up, my kids tend to be off for two, even three weeks in the winter time. It can feel really disorienting. Okay. And that can be painful because you might be thinking to yourself, like, isn't this the life that I worked for? Like, you know, if you're anything like me, and I'm going to talk more about this, too, when I became an entrepreneur, it was literally to be able to have the life that I have now, right? And so when I find myself complaining, stressed, miserable, let's be honest, counting down to back to school, I feel guilty for that, right? I feel like, well, what the heck? Like, this is supposed to be the dream. So we're gonna solve all of it. This is gonna be the year that you do it differently. This is the year I'm doing it differently. This is the year you're doing it differently. We're gonna do it together. But I just wanted to start by saying if you dread it, if you look at that date of school ending on the calendar and you feel a little bit of dread, that's okay. And that is so normal. And you're not alone. And yet also, we can do a number of things in order to take care of it. And honestly, like, why can't this be the best summer you've ever had with your kids? Like, I'm claiming that for myself. Like, this is going to be my favorite summer. And it's going to be my favorite summer. Because I'm deciding that right now. Okay, you can do the same thing. I invite you to do that with me. Let's first just briefly talk about the problem with summer for working moms and working dads, okay? It's not just about the logistics, although those are very real. Okay? Yes. You may have signed up for the freaking camps back in November when they make you do it like months and months ahead of time. For a lot of us, you know, summertime looks like piecing your schedule together in a way that is not typical. Right? There's a lot of whiplash, not just for us, but for our kiddos too, with the routine, hard words, routine change, the change of the routine. The lack of structure is, I know it can be difficult for kids. I think it's. I'm a very, you know, a creature of structure. So it can be really disorienting for me to not have my normal family rhythms. And this one, how about this one? This sneaky one. Unrealist, unrealistic expectations. Okay? You might go into it thinking like rose colored glasses. It's going to be so dreamy. It's going to be. Kids are going to be little angels at the pool, right? And we're like, we get into it and it's like, this is. I feel the same thing about the holidays. Picture your kids, you know, sitting on Santa's lap in their pajamas, being so sweet. And like an hour into winter break, they're like tearing each other's heads off or something, right? So the unrealistic expectations are a huge piece of this as well. And I think one of the things we're going to explore here is what I like to think of as like the mental gymnastics that come into when, when you have your Own business. This is where I think I could be talking to all working parents, but this is where I'm talking really specifically to my clients and my people. If you're listening to this podcast, you are very likely an entrepreneur or an aspiring entrepreneur. We have a. Another level of mental gymnastics, I think, and that's because we are our own boss, which is amazing, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't think you would either. But your boss expects you to be squeezing in work, right? That mean old boss of yours herself, right? Like, the mental gymnastics of, like, okay, well, I can make my own schedule, but, like, when am I going to squeeze in my little work, right? Like, when am I going to get that one little thing that I'm supposed to be doing that really presents a problem when we are also wanting to be present with our kids? I have found over the years that those two things are very much at odds with each other. Okay, If I have my kids around and I'm telling myself, like, well, I can just get this. Like, I can just get a little thing done today, or. Well, I. I have that one deadline. People are counting on me. I have to find the space to get it done today. I find that when I'm trying to do both at the same time, I. I feel brittle towards my kids and in my own body and my own mind, I feel rigid, I feel edgy, and I feel resentful. I start to resent my life. I start to resent my company. And if I'm honest, probably even my kids, right? And certainly I'm not with them. I'm not having the summer that I really dream of because my brain is in work and my brain. My brain is like trying to be in two places at the same time. And I just end up getting frustrated. It comes out as anger for me. It's like I'm watching my kids, you know, trying to take care of them. And I'm also halfway at work. I'm doing two things really mediocre, and I don't like how that feels, right? So that's kind of the problem. I think I just wanted to, like, contextualize that, give us a little bit of context for where, like, when I was thinking about this, I was like, wow. Like, why. Why is. Why is summer always kind of sneak up and feel heavy if I'm honest, Like, just can feel exhausting. I think therein lies the problem. All of the things that I just laid out. I think it's important for us to understand what is really going on before we start to dive into the fixes. I think the, the telltale signs are there that we have unmet needs. I know for me that when I'm trying to pour into my business and I'm trying to pour into my kids in the summertime histor, there hasn't been a lot of time left over for me. I know it can feel like a really tall order to figure out how am I going to do all three of these things? Well, how am I going to take care of my kids, take care of the business? And you're telling me I have to take care of myself. Like, how is that even possible? Right? It can absolutely feel impossible. And I think it is our default setting as parents and in particular as moms to kick ourselves out of the equation. We, you know, we're going to put ourselves last. Right? And you may not even want to be doing that. You may not even be consciously doing that. I just think on some level it's how we are wired. I like to, I never like to use my own wiring and my own DNA against me, against myself. I'm not going to make myself wrong for being the woman I was designed to be. Right. My maternal instinct kicking in and telling me that I need to provide for my kids and I need to protect them and I need to meet their needs. For this is literally how my brain was created. So you don't need to, you know, beat yourself up for. If you feel like you haven't been taking care of yourself the way that you want to. If you feel like you look back on your summers and you're like, oh yeah, like I don't work out in the summer or I'm just picking off my kids plates in the summer. I'm not feeding myself. You don't need to beat yourself up about that. You can just decide right now that you're going to do something different. So the first thing I want to say, we're going to kind of get into some guiding principles for a joyful and productive summer. We're doing both, my friends. We're not choosing joyful, productive. May I even add into the mix restful. What could we be doing rest this summer? I think we should. I think we should. So I had five guiding principles, but I'm going to go ahead and say six because this is a bonus one that didn't make it onto my list that I'm going to go ahead and touch on first, which is knowing what your success habits are. Okay. Know what your like, metrics are or your vitals call them vital signs. Okay? I'm thinking of your body when you go to the hospital or even, like, your vehicle when you take it to the shop. What are those key indicators? What are they looking for? Like, how's the oil, right? What's your gas tank doing? How about the engine? Is the engine light on? Like, go with me on this analogy, right? Like, what are your body's and your brain's vital signs that, you know, you have to be, like, meeting those needs daily. And guys, it doesn't have to be perfection and it certainly doesn't have to be a lot of things. But for me, like, just to give you some ideas, I know that if I go, you guys know what I'm gonna say. If you've been listening to my podcast a lot, you know that I gotta go to my bootcamp classes, right? I. They have childcare at my gym. If you're a parent and you wanna work out and your gym doesn't have childcare, find a gym with childcare if you possibly can, okay? It's a game changer. And I feel like it just takes so many excuses out of the equation, right? Like, if your kids can be cared for and you can take care of yourself, everybody wins. And I personally think it sets an incredible example for your kids, okay. Of taking, like, I have open conversations, especially with my daughter at this point, who's older than my son, about, like, mom taking care of mom's health and how much I want to have a long life, right? And she gets that, and I think that's really cool. So for me, it's getting to my bootcamp classes. It's water, water, water, water. Especially in the summertime, right? It's hitting my protein goal, feeding my body properly. I'm not eating off my kids plates. I'm making myself a lunch. I am doing what needs to be done to fuel my body. If you need a shortcut and you want to order factor meals, do that right from the website. Factor high protein meals. Also getting my steps for the day. That one is one I can do with my kids. Like, let's go on a bike ride. Will you guys bike? I'll walk or jog alongside you. Scooters, playground, Right? But those are the things. Oh, and sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep. No sacrificing our sleep. Knowing what your core metrics are that keep you at your best. Because if you're not. You guys know this. I know you know this, and I don't mean to harp on it, but, like, I'm reminding myself because it's just so easy to be like, no, no, I'm fine, I'm fine. And it's like, it's not fine, right? It's just not fine. So you know that you have to be taking care of yourself. If you had to have any prayer at taking care of your kids in a way that makes you proud and running your business in a way that's going to lead to success. So that's very first thing. I've said this before. This changed my life when I really got this. When things are difficult at home, when it's a. A busy season. So a perfect example. I learned this lesson when I was solo parenting. There was this one time where my husband went to Hawaii for a work trip. He went to a wedding in California and then a work trip in Hawaii and he was gone for like, I want to say ten days. Okay, seven, ten, something like that. And I just remember by the end of that trip, I was hanging on by a literal thread and I'm sure some of you can relate. And I just remember when I was doing that solo parenting and texting with some friends or whoever, people would say things to me like, oh, man, make sure you pour yourself like an extra big glass of wine tonight. You know, things like this. And I did. And you know what ended up happening? I was just burnt. Like I said, by the end of it, I was unwell. Right. And I think we do. It's the human experience too. Like when we get stressed, a lot of times we do stop doing what I would call the basics. And in that moment, I learned that when things, when the tighter your schedule gets, the busier you are, the fuller life feels, the more you need to double down on your success habits. Okay. A lot of times our brain is like, that's optional stuff like, I'll get to the gym if I get there. No, no, no, it's the other way around. You need the gym more when life is full, when the demands are higher, you need it more, not less. Maybe for you that's meditation journaling. I don't know what it is for you, but you got to stop talking yourself out of the things that make you successful. Being busy is like the number one easy excuse, I think, to stop doing those things. And so when my husband was gone on that trip, I remember the light bulb going off and saying to myself, when I'm alone with my children, or again, like, maybe summertime's another great example. I'm going to have like increased demands on me. I need to be thinking about self care as an extreme sport. And I remember telling friends that and they were like, you are so dramatic. And I'm like, yes, this is true, I am. But that's how I see it this summer. Your self care should be an extreme sport. Maybe that doesn't resonate with you. It really what that means to me just to break that, like what am I, what do I mean? I just mean like if you were to go, like, if you were to exaggerate it, right? If you were to commit to it on like a whole other level, like when you watch extreme sports, you're like, why are they doing so much? Like I thought we were skiing, why are we flipping in the air? It's an extreme sport. They're just on another level with it. And it's like, I just love that limitation of like self care as an extreme sport. How do you put that above everything that you possibly can and see it as the assignment, the urgent call that it really is. I cannot emphasize this enough. You have to be prioritizing that. I don't mean to preach at you guys. I try not to preach, but I'm on my pulpit right now just because this has changed my life so much and I'm talking to myself too, that like every day I like to check in with like, have I done the things for myself? Okay? Because if I don't, I just don't think that it's reasonable to expect myself to perform at the level that I'm asking myself to perform for my family and for my business. Okay? So that's number one. Number two, designated work time and designated kid time. Going back to the problem that I mentioned, I really do believe that is at the core of what makes it feel so difficult is when you're trying to do two things at once. And like I said, I do this too. I'm like, shoot, I have them all day today and something is due from me. Like a client's waiting on something for me, right? Instead of planning ahead enough to be like, when they're home, I'm with them. I'm not trying to be like, well, maybe if I put the TV on I could get a little bit of. No, none of that, right? I. This summer I'm going in with the thought, if they're around, I'm off, if they're around, I'm off. And you might be like, well, how, how, how are you going to do that? Look, look, this summer I'm putting it all on the table. Early morning, evening or weekend work. All of that is better than constant Interruption. Okay. You know, if you have a partner and you're able to maybe work when they're not working, that becomes an option. If you don't have a partner, what are other options that you have other people in your life where you may be able to rely on for some of that protected time if you need to use. You know, I have a friend who calls it TV camp. Right? Like during the summer they just do a week of tv. Maybe you need a TV camp. Okay? But really thinking about designated work time versus designated kid time, in a couple of steps here, I'm going to get to a piece of this. If you're thinking to yourself like, that does not seem realistic. That doesn't. That doesn't seem doable, I'm going to clean it up for you. I think it's the last step that I have for you because what you're thinking in your head about this is what's going to turn the key in the lock, okay? And so if you're thinking, that's not possible, that's not. It's never enough time. I don't have enough time. I don't see how I could possibly get this all done in this tiny, tiny amount of time that I have. I want you to have the thought, I. This is more than enough time for me to get my work done. Like, it's not a problem. We'll get back to that in just a minute. If you're like, I need to hear more about that, we're going there. Okay? The second thing, and relatedly is book the camps, guys. Book the camps. Get the babysitter. Lots of people are home from college looking for work. Get somebody. Buy back your time in the summer, okay? I want you to have lots of juicy experiences with your kids if you desire that. Me too. And also, we're going to be doing some camps and having some help. All right? So I don't know about you, where you live, but here it feels like a lot of the camps are like a tiny amount of time. It's like 9am to 12pm or I think my son is 9am to 1pm it is so tempting to look at that and be like, that's not even worth it. I'm here to tell you it's worth it. Okay? Let yourself have that time. Let them do the YMCA camp or whatever you have around you. Even if it's a half day camp, it's worth it. Even if it's four hours with the babysitter, it's worth it. And you can have the Thought, I can get all my work done in three hours. I can get all my work done in three hours. Like all the things I need to get done, I can get them done right. Again, we're going to come back to this. If you're like, no, literally I don't understand how I could do that. We will come back to that. But that it starts with you having that thought, right. And then you know, just thinking about how when again sort of going back to the success habits. Right. I was having this thought today because I noticed it in myself that I've been really tired and really run down. I've had a lot of travel, an unusual amount of travel. And yesterday when I was really exhausted on Sunday, I was trying to make decisions with a low tank and I just noticed my ability to get things done, to make decisions was so degraded in that state of exhaustion right now that I'm a little bit more rested. I came back to some of those decisions today and I was like, oh like this isn't a problem. I can get this done in like 20 minutes. Okay. So if you are struggling to get things done and you're thinking like everything just takes me so much time. I want you to go back to those success habits and be like, are you sleeping? How's your diet? How's your movement? I know it's so counterintuitive to be like there's no way she's asking me to work on that stuff before I think about my clients or my even sales. Okay, I'm your sales girl. But even sales, I'm going to tell you to fill up your tank before you start trying to solve more complex problems. And again, this is not to my procrastinator like my procrastina productive people. This is not an opportunity. I'm not telling you to go spend three hours a day on self care. Your self care for the day should be taking less than an hour. It doesn't have to be a huge like I'm not asking for a huge investment of your time, but you do need to prioritize sleep. You don't have to kick out your work. You can kick out your scrolling. Okay. You can kick out tv. I don't really watch tv. Guys, my friends will tell you that my, my best, best friend Claire Pels, she'll be like, I always forget you don't watch any tv. I can't talk about TV with you. It's not worth it to me. I will probably like. It kind of becomes a question of like how badly do you want it how badly do you want to sleep? How badly do you want to feel good? I don't drink alcohol because I desire feeling so good. So we have to take a hard look at our stories. And I can only say that because I have done that myself. I would never ask you all to do something that I haven't been willing to do myself. Okay, all right. The third thing, and this one was a game changer for me over my winter break. This past winter break was my first experience of genuinely loving my time with with my kids over winter break. Like, then that sounds awful to say. Of course I enjoy the time with them, but I was not counting down to school coming back. I wasn't. And we actually even had an extra week off because of snow. A whole week. And I was like, I kind of don't want them to go back. Like, we were having a great time. One of the things that really helps is what I like to call one anchor activity per day. Especially if you have like a non camp day or like you have no child care that day, you need an anchor activity. Another way to look at this is one project a day, one project, one thing to do. It could be as advanced or like as, you know, I don't know, as like sophisticated as going to a museum or the zoo. But it could also be simple. It could be like, honestly, going to your gym that has the childcare could be your anchor activity. It could be booking a spot in a play cafe for two hours. It could be, here's another idea of like, my kids and I are going to be making a big poster together. That's like a summer bucket list of all the ideas of things we want to do together, big and small. Some of those things will be as simple as make homemade popsicles. Go to the store, get the things to make the popsicles, make them freeze them, eat them. That would be an anchor activity. If you want to do some baking, some art, like what a slip and slide. We're going to put a slip and slide in our backyard. That gets to be your anchor activity for the day. It gives the day some shape and helps everybody's mood, especially maybe mine. Okay. Just to be like, okay, yeah, that's gonna break up the day. We're not gonna be climbing the walls. How did I not mention swimming? Going to the pool, if you have access to a pool, having that be your anchor activity, it's like, okay, at 3:00, you know, if you have younger kids, when people are getting up from their naps, we're gonna Go to the pool. That's gonna be like, our anchor activity. I don't think you need to have an overly structured day, but I think that that can bring back some of those rhythm and routine feelings that we get and we crave during the school year. So anchor activity. One per day. At least one per day. You could do more, but I think that gets to be a little crazy. So just pick one, and it will give your day some shape, and your kids will love it. They'll be like, we did so many fun things this summer. If you do do just one thing a day, it really adds up over the summertime. Okay, two more things. One is. And this is the cheesy part. So again, bear with me. But for real, like, let's just have a moment. Okay? Gratitude as an anchor. Okay. I was preparing for this podcast episode, and I had the thought, this is the life that I dreamed of when I was 26 in Chicago, listening to podcasts, driving to my corporate job, being like, could I really do this? Like, when I pictured it having kids, I didn't have kids yet, but I knew I was married, and I knew I wanted kids. My husband and I wanted kids. I was, like, picturing it, and I was like, summer with the kids and a thriving business, and I wouldn't have to choose. You're telling me I could be in charge of my own schedule and make all the money that I want to make all the money that I desire, have all the success that I desire, and I could, like, spend this quality time with them, right? Are you kidding? If you're anything like me, you lose sight of that. It's a miracle. It's a miracle. It's a privilege. And some of you listening to this might not be there yet, and you're like, yeah, that's what I'm working for, right? But once you get here, just like anything, as humans, we acclimate. You get the dream house, you acclimate, you lose the weight, you get what? No big deal, right? It's a big deal. It's a really big deal. And so, you know, I know I don't personally love all of the content on social media about, like, we only get 18 summers with our kids. Like, I think that just. I don't know. I just think that's. I don't understand how that's helpful. It's, like, too sad, right? But what I will say is it is true that we only have so many summers with our kids before they leave the house, right? And I just had the thought, like, as I was preparing for my summer. I was like, I don't want to miss it by white knuckling my way through it and being stressed. Not only do I want, not want my kids to remember me like that, but like, I don't want to remember my experience of being a mother. Like that. Right? And it really is a choice. It can be annoying to hear, but it's also empowering and empower. It makes me feel empowered to be like, oh, I get to pick, right? So I think gratitude is the way in just being grateful that you have the opportunity at all to get to do this right, that you have choices. We have so many options as entrepreneurs who are also parents. Like, let's not forget about our free will. Right? Let's not forget about the fact that we're the grown up in the situation. If you don't like how it's feeling, toss it, get a blank piece of paper, start again, right? Like, what would it look like to build it the way that you want it? How amazing. It's a blank canvas. I think we forget that. So I'm personally going to be really focusing on my gratitude this summer. I'm going to be journaling it in my, in my journal every day. And I'm only, it's only gonna take me five minutes, but just reminding myself of how grateful I really am and how, how beautiful this life really is. Okay. And I think I've had also had this thought, Let presence. This is so good. Let presence be part of the success. Let presence be part of the success. We're so good at kicking our own butts about our revenue goals and our, you know, likes on Instagram or how many subscribers you have or what. Whatever metric you're all twisted up about, you've got a goal. I love that for you. But what if you put presence into how you're defining success? What if part of your success for this summer is, yeah, I achieved my business goals, but I was also like, so super present with my kids when I was with them. I was going down the damn slip and slide. I was in the pool. I was, you know, really hanging out with them. I wasn't trying to squirrel away little pieces of work. When I was with them. I knew when my work time was, I scheduled it on my calendar and when I wasn't working, I was with them. I mean, it just puts such a smile on my face to think about that weighing into part of your success. I know for me, that's success in motherhood. Right? And that has to be just as Valued as all of our big, bold, audacious business goals. Okay. The last guiding principle I wanted to share with you is possibly the most important, probably the most important. And that is. We gotta talk about time. We gotta talk about time. I've shared this on the podcast before. I am someone who has really struggled with thoughts about time. I think all parents do, certainly to some degree, maybe some of us more than others. Right? But not having enough time, never having enough time, wanting more time. I've had so many stories about this and they still come up. It's still something that I have to manage, but I've really been talking a lot about this with my clients and also on social media. If you follow me on Instagram at hey. @heysteffcrowder, I just recently posted a reel about it about this that people really liked, which is that time is actually not the problem. If you feel like. If you feel overwhelmed, we've been talking about overwhelm. If you feel overwhelmed, you have to look at your capability and your capacity. So I want to have you think about capacity versus time. When you feel capable, when you're like, I got this. Yeah, I have a lot on my to do list. But, like, I can do everything on my list. If you have the thought, like, I can. I can handle this, you will just move through it. There's no problem. You can feel busy, but you're not gonna feel overwhelmed. I want you to think about the difference between feeling full, feeling fully scheduled, and being like, when your head. It's okay, by the way, for when your head hits the pillow to be like, damn, I'm tired. That's okay, great. That being tired means you lived a full life. Okay. And your body can handle it. You can handle it. You have to be the judge of that. But that generally is not the issue. The issue Overwhelm. Feeling like, I'm so overwhelmed, I can't figure it out. Oh, my God. The chicken with the head cut off. You have to really look at. Where are you telling yourself you're not capable of achieving it? There is somewhere, if you're overwhelmed, there is somewhere that you are telling yourself, I don't have what it takes to figure this out. This is too much for me. I can't handle this. I don't know how to do it. I'm gonna screw it up. Those tend to be those tricky little thoughts that are undermining your whole ability to see yourself as capable. And it's coming out as, I just need to manage my time better. Right? That's what My clients tell me, I just need to manage my time better. I just need more time. I don't have enough time. Right? When we dig in and find, like, if you had the thought, like, I can figure this out. I always do. Like, I can figure this out. There's no problem. I can solve any problem. You have to look for where you're not in belief of that. Because if you think about it like, this is why I'm so excited for this summer. Because I've been really working on my thoughts about how capable I am. And it's helping me, like, bend time. I feel like time, like, you hear people say time is a concept. And I'm always like, rolling my eyes. I'm like, what does that even mean? But I think I kind of get it now where I'm like, I really do believe that anything I want to get done in my business, I'm like, I can do it, I can do it. I can increase my. I. I'm not able to increase my time, okay. Kind of maxed out on how much time I have. And that's. That's gonna have to be what it is. But you know what? I can increase my capacity. I can increase my capacity for doing hard things. I can increase my capacity for doing things imperfectly. I can increase my capacity for getting it 80 of the way and shipping it right. I can increase my capacity to work at night, even though it's not my favorite. Okay. I can increase my capacity to wake up early. There's so many different places that I. And it's not just about doing more and more and more. It's about expanding. If you think about like a container, it's about like, I think we believe that we are this rigid container that can never take on more. And it's like, if you want to be able to hold more, you have to grow the container. Now we're back to success habits, because that's one of the ways that you grow the containers by taking care of yourself, right? My capacity has grown tenfold since I started doing self care as an extreme sport. So it really all ties together. So I think you can ask yourself, where am I telling myself that I'm not capable? And if there, if you've run into something where you're like, no, I really don't know how to do this. Okay, great, let's figure it out, right? Like, now you can troubleshoot, now you can problem solve. Don't know how to do it. Find somebody who can, who can help you. Who can you ask? Who can you learn from, but you really do. I mean like this such a winning thought for me is I can figure this out. I always do. And, and when you have that mentality, time is not a problem. I'm like, I can launch. I'm gonna guess what I'm gonna be launching all through June. A sold out group programs. Mastermind's gonna be opening up at the end of June and I'm gonna have my whole launch done ahead of time. I don't have to even like June. I'm gonna be spending a lot of time with my kids. My kids and my clients is my theme for June. My kids and my clients. Right? I'm gonna get, I have two weeks. I'm gonna get my launch done, I'm gonna get it done and I'm going to get it scheduled and it's just going to be running and I'll be present with my kids. My business will be doing what it's supposed to be doing. You can bend time when you believe that you're capable, right? And you look, because I think when you have the belief I'm capable, that's where you make room for creative problem solving. That's where you get to look at like I think when we, when we're in overwhelm, there's no creativity, there's no creative problem solving, there's no new ideas, there's no. How can I look at this differently? It's very rigid. It's like it has to be done this exact way. I need eight hours, hours a day and if I don't have it, I'm totally screwed. How often have you thought that? I know I have, but with my new thoughts about like, no, I'm capable, it almost feels like a challenge, like a healthy challenge where I'm like, how do I have the business of my dreams on the schedule that I want? I'm letting myself believe that that's possible. How can you let yourself believe and like let go of that story that only like successful people have, you know, nine to five? Not necessarily. That's just what we've been conditioned to believe, right? This doesn't mean that that's actually what's required to get the work done. Okay, so my friends, that is what I have for you about summer. This summer. Let's choose presence. Let's choose productivity and joy and rest. The three of those things, right? You don't need to be perfect, but you can be intentional. So if you were to maybe take to your journal, give you a little bit of homework, I want you to maybe try these prompts. You can use them exactly the way I'm about to say them. You can make it feel better for you. You know the drill. But try this. Okay. If I believed I had enough time or. And. Or if time wasn't a problem, what would I plan for the summer? You could even say, what would I plan for this week? How would I hand. Like that's kind of how I'm going to be handling it is like a bit week to week. Some weeks we have a lot of camp stuff going on. Other weeks we have nothing. Okay. So you. It's okay to take it week to week, especially in the summertime. And then here's the second prompt for you. What would my summer feel like if I showed up as both CEO, Right. Operational Excellence CEO Identity and Present Mom. Summer Mom. You can have both at the same time. My friends, I hope that this has been helpful. It's been helpful for me, honestly, just to even bring my. Like, this feels like helping me set my own intention. So I thank you for giving me the opportunity to say it all out loud. Let's go have the best summer with our kids that we've ever had. Let's have a successful summer where the measuring stick for success is business. Results and presence, joy and productivity, fun and hard work, rest and all the things. All the things all at once. You got it. I'm rooting for you. Please reach out to me on social media if this episode was helpful for you. I always love to hear from you. You can DM me at hey, Steph Curr router. I'll catch you next time. And until then, I'm wishing you the courage and the clarity to go after what you love.