Man Boobs - Episode 264

Summary

Crash Dummies Podcast – "Man Boobs" (Episode 264)

Release Date: June 24, 2026
Hosts: Patrick Johnson & Michael Esiobu
Guests/Co-hosts: Jean, Carrie, Various Callers

Episode Overview

This episode of Crash Dummies Podcast is a comedic deep dive into current events, internet culture, relationships, and uniquely wild listener stories. Pat, Mike, Jean, and Carrie riff about AI, celebrity gossip, social dynamics of "tricking," public confessions, embarrassing dating moments, and more. The episode features a stream of live caller interactions, each bringing fresh, unpredictable energy and serving as a springboard for hilarious group banter.

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Key Discussions & Insights

1. AI, Data Centers & Random Musings

[01:30–02:55]

• Jean jokes about the environmental impact of using ChatGPT, thinking every search "drains Memphis’ water," sparking a playful confusion about data centers.
  • Jean: "Like, man, I’m up their water right now. But I gotta know, I gotta know the data history." (01:54)
  • The group discusses how data centers affect local environments and riff on guilt over using AI.

2. AI vs. Google, and Searching for Gossip

[02:56–03:46]

• Funny rules for ChatGPT: Pat claims you shouldn’t use ChatGPT for questions Google can answer; Jean roasts him for being a business-mode user.
  • Pat: "I have a rule, though. You can’t use a chat GPT for things you can Google." (02:35)
  • Banter about celebrity face-resembling memes (e.g., Kerry Washington vs. Lil Baby), with playful jabs at celebrity dating and behavior.

3. Relationship Dynamics, Vlogs & Live Shows

[04:53–06:46]

• Pat promotes his new vlog and discusses stepping out of his comfort zone to show day-to-day life—only to be roasted by Mike and Jean for being “boring.”
  • The crew discusses doing a live show in Milwaukee, debating whether all their ex-friends should be invited for audience drama.
  • Jean: "They always say you dehydrated at every event… Soon as the fun start… y’all don’t think the music a little too loud?" (05:45)

4. Paul Pierce vs. Streamers: “Tricking” and Clout Dating

[07:21–12:00]

• Pat and Jean break down Paul Pierce's rant against "streamers" and the current climate of men spending money for attention from women.
  • Guest (imitating Paul Pierce): "Y’all only popular because y’all getting money off this and that… Y’all got all these girls out here thinking they can get dollars like that." (09:12)
  • Debate over whether NBA players or streamers are really "driving up the price" for women's attention.
  • Discussion on how “tricking” (spending money to win favor) isn’t new, but is now more visible—especially in the streaming age.

5. What Is Tricking? Is It Just Relationship Economics?

[14:03–19:48]

• The hosts get philosophical (and funny) about the definition of “tricking” in relationships:
  • Pat: "I think everybody… kind of always trick. I just think tricking has a negative connotation to it. It’s just like courting a girl." (14:10)
  • Jean says having a girlfriend is “the ultimate form of tricking” because you give "one woman daily money”—a humiliation ritual disguised as love.
  • Conversation explores money, intention, partnership, and whether “joint bank accounts” are a financial trap.

6. Cheating Confessions & Changing for the Better (Call-in Segment)

[34:22–36:47]

• Hilarious, self-deprecating caller admits to quitting cheating just "two weeks ago," but only because his side girl cut things off.
  • Caller: "I only cheat when she make me mad." (34:51)
  • Jean: "So you pump fake. She followed you and you shot two free throws and you blaming it on her." (35:41)

7. Wildest/Worst Dates Ever – Call-in Stories

[41:12–66:38]

• Multiple callers and guests share dating nightmares, each story more intense than the last.

Notable Calls:

• The Cheesecake Factory Betrayal (41:12–46:41):

  • Caller’s date spends an evening texting a shirtless guy, ruining a long-anticipated visit to his favorite restaurant.
  • Caller: "She knew how important Cheesecake Factory was to me... the whole time, she’s sitting there talking to somebody else." (41:48)

• Tipping Fiasco & Piggyback Fail (47:00–54:01):

  • Caller outraged after a guy leaves zero tip twice and requests a piggyback ride while wearing a tiny Under Armour shirt and weighing 250 lbs.
  • Guest Female: "He wanted me to give him a piggyback ride. And I did." (51:34)
  • Jean: "How’d you do, champ? Not well at all." (52:57)

• Parents' Couch Disaster + Petite Problem (59:47–66:43):

  • Carrie details a date at a guy’s parents’ house. He watches TV clips, checks a church live stream to monitor his parents, then exposes himself in toddler-like fashion.
  • Carrie: "He stands up, pants still around his ankles, and whips out a four-inch penis... I touched him for about thirty seconds. Done. All over his lap. Just thick, hot, disgusting." (62:45–63:45)
  • She ends up drying her hands with toilet paper and faking a call to escape.

8. "Man Boobs" and Body Confidence

[72:00–77:26]

• The titular segment: a caller opens up about getting surgery for gynecomastia (“man boobs”), being self-conscious despite an otherwise fit body, and how the operation changed his life.
  • Caller: "I stopped having titties, man, and made my life better." (72:08)
  • Group jokes about surgery, recovery, and confidence—emphasizing men's mental health and self-acceptance.

9. Celebrity Kinks, Kanye’s Muse & Relationship Embarrassment

[77:32–79:26]

• The group briefly discusses Kanye using his wife as a muse (“cow milking” photo shoots), and whether his openness is embarrassing her.
  • Pat: "I don’t think she cares as much." (77:40)
  • Jean: "That’s his muse, you know?" (77:42)

10. Social Commentary: Law, Conspiracies & Video Game Therapy

[79:44–90:30]

• The effect of fame on families, criminal justice empathy, being a juror/judge, and political presence at sporting events.
• Musings on men’s need for “space” and video games as adult stress relief.
  • Jean and Pat reminisce about simulator games, Roller Coaster Tycoon, and being uncompetitive with young online gamers.
  • Pat: "Guys need more… we gotta start being okay taking our space." (86:22)

11. Satirical Social Critique & Closing Thoughts

[90:30–end]

• Playful jabs at podcast listeners/followers who nitpick their opinions.
  • Pat: "That’s the point of a podcast... you have to be brave enough to give your opinion." (89:18)
• Riffing on voting, government conspiracies, and political wealth.
  • Jean: "When someone offers you a crazy amount of money... sometimes it doesn’t feel like an offer. Sometimes it feels like 'no, take this, because you’re doing too much.'" (99:54)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On “tricking”:
  • Jean: "The ultimate tricking is being a boyfriend… When the last time you paid for a meal?" (18:47)
• On streaming culture:
  • Pat: "Paul Pierce was in a… stream live. This nigga was streaming him with strippers and shit. But strippers, though, which lost him his job..." (11:22)
• On caller’s surgery:
  • Caller: "I lost over, like, 100 pounds, and that was, like, the only thing that didn’t leave." (75:30)
• On video game futility:
  • Jean: "I shot at a dude, once he built a castle and killed me." (84:29)
• On being a judge:
  • Pat: "I can’t be a judge. I feel too much empathy… I don’t think I could be personally be a judge." (81:00)
• On political offers:
  • Jean: "When someone offers you a crazy amount of money… sometimes it doesn’t feel like an offer. Sometimes it feels like, 'no, take this, you’re doing too much…' Good luck." (99:54)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• AI, ChatGPT, Environment: 01:30–02:55
• Paul Pierce & Streamers: 07:21–14:00
• Tricking & Relationship Economics: 14:03–19:48
• Confession: Cheating caller: 34:22–36:47
• Worst Date Stories (multi-part): 41:12–66:43
• “Man Boobs”/Gynecomastia Caller: 72:00–77:26
• Kanye's Muse & Relationship Kinks: 77:32–79:26
• Video Games & Men’s Mental Health: 83:42–87:26
• Podcast Critics & Social Commentary: 88:49–90:30

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Tone, Vibe & Listener Takeaway

• The tone is irreverent, rapid-fire, and cheerfully offbeat.
• Hosts are unfiltered, self-deprecating, and encourage radical honesty from callers.
• A blend of comical banter, candid takes on culture, and unpredictable listener engagement makes the episode entertaining and surprisingly insightful.
• Listeners will come away with relatable laughs, wild stories, and raucous opinions—the heart of Crash Dummies.

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For full context, listen to the episode for the banter and wild details only Crash Dummies can deliver!

Transcript

[Mike]

I see you.

[Pat]

Fire and Ash is now streaming on Disney. It's the film critics are calling the best avatar yet.

[Jean]

A true epic and completely jaw dropping.

[Mike]

This is the only pure thing in this world.

[Jean]

Return to Pandora on Disney.

[Pat]

It will be an adventure for the whole fam.

[Jean]

And watch the Oscar winning phenomenon at home.

[Carrie]

This is sick.

[Pat]

Fire and Ash now streaming on Disney.

[Jean]

Rated PG 13. So good, so good, so good.

[Mike]

New summer arrivals are at Nordstrom Rack stores now. Get ready to save big with up to 60% off brands like Rag and Bone, Levi's, Adidas and free people. Join the NordicLub to unlock exclusive discounts. Shop new arrivals first and more. Plus buy online and pick up at your favorite rack store for free. Great brands, great prices. That's why you rack.

[Jean]

Study and play come together on a Windows 11 PC. And for a limited time, college students get the best of both worlds. Get the unreal college deal. Everything you need to study and play with select Windows 11 PCs. Eligible students get a year of Microsoft 365 Premium and a year of Xbox game Pass ultimate with a custom color Xbox wireless controller. Learn [e-mail] studentoffer law supplies last ends June 30th terms at aka mscollegepc. Oh, what was he talking about the other day? So what happened? So what? Huh?

[Pat]

Said getting juiced up. That's what Kerry is talking about.

[Jean]

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Getting juiced up. But what? So okay, so if I, if I type something in on chat GPT, who does it affect?

[Pat]

The environment.

[Jean]

The environment for who though? I mean, I think it's like Memphis, right? Memphis. Like one of the main stuff.

[Pat]

It's not Memphis.

[Jean]

I don't know, bro. Why is that? In my head, that's why I hate the Internet. Because I, I chat GBT something about like Tyga and Kylie Jenner the other day and all I had was Memphis on my mind. Like, man, I'm up their water right now. But I gotta know, I gotta know the data history.

[Pat]

But I think it's the data centers, wherever they put the data centers at.

[Jean]

Got it, got it, got it. So we shouldn't send a donation to like that.

[Pat]

That's what you got. You got to offset it in Memphis. Every, like every random chat GPT thing you put into your phone, you got to donate some water.

[Jean]

Got it. I just hit up one of my Memphis like, I'm sorry bro.

[Pat]

Oh my God.

[Jean]

I need to know if Jordan really had the flu, man.

[Pat]

Or he was hung over. Now usually you, I, I, I have a rule though. You can't use a chat gbt for. For things you can Google.

[Jean]

You can't tell people what they do. Nah, nah, not Google uses AI.

[Pat]

Yeah, Google uses AI as well. But I'm just saying like just use Google. You try to be different.

[Jean]

What you mean?

[Pat]

Nah, you try to be too different, bro.

[Jean]

No, but you use it for business, right?

[Pat]

Sometimes yeah. I don't.

[Jean]

You know what I'm saying? I use the Internet for business. I save my chat GPT for random shit. Who the was? Kerry Washington and that dude really on stand up. That's too much chemistry for me. I'm not with it.

[Pat]

The Kerry Washington make that face in every movie.

[Jean]

No, that's crazy. No, when they put up the side by side with Kerry Washington and Lil Baby at the same time and they look just alike.

[Mike]

Y not gonna keep coming.

[Pat]

No, no. I love Gary Washington.

[Jean]

Twinsies. No, she used to be my crush until she started dating Namdi Ashwa.

[Mike]

And why?

[Jean]

I mean she got a man.

[Mike]

Oh, okay.

[Jean]

You know what I'm saying? It's just like Megan good when I found out she smoked cigarettes. Dunzo.

[Pat]

That's doing.

[Carrie]

Hello.

[Pat]

The radio is for people who are driving.

[Caller]

I'll drive.

[Pat]

Welcome to Crash Dummies podcast. Anyway, welcome to Crash Dummies podcast episode I think 264. I'm Mike. We got Pat here, we got Jean here, we got Carrie here with an e at the end.

[Mike]

Yes, I E.

[Jean]

Noni Juice.

[Mike]

I need to put some oil on this.

[Pat]

Look at it on the mic.

[Jean]

Yeah, yeah. This guy real crazy. Your husband listening on audio right now. What the hey. He got to the YouTube like. Oh, okay. Thought these had me up. No, sorry audio listeners for that. But also damn. I ain't talked to the audio listeners in a minute.

[Pat]

What do you mean?

[Jean]

I just feel like I haven't gave them a special message.

[Pat]

What you got to say to them then?

[Jean]

Okay, here we go.

[Pat]

This is so immature, bro.

[Mike]

Take that.

[Pat]

Anyway, make sure you guys the merch is live on the website. Patreon Patreon. Patreon Patreon. I dropped my own personal vlog on there. We're going to start dropping some BTs. I'm also have probably that vlog is probably on my YouTube channel. I'm going to link it somewhere here that you can go watch. Yeah, I've been vlogging.

[Jean]

Now we try to go follow this YouTube.

[Pat]

Try to get out my comfort zone.

[Mike]

Okay, Tell the people what's going to be in your vlog.

[Pat]

Kind of like my day to day life.

[Mike]

Boring

[Pat]

Now I told Kid cooking a little too much?

[Jean]

No, she's been.

[Pat]

I got something for you. My shit, though, is going to be twice. Twice is worse. And it's gonna happen like, eight months later.

[Jean]

I've been talking to your old friend group, too, so I've been digging up some tea. Yeah, yeah. They always say you dehydrated at every event. They say you got a headache all the time. Soon as the fun start. Gary talking about y' all don't think the music a little too loud? We gonna dance the whole night. Like, y' all don't think we could go sit down One day, y' all

[Mike]

gonna understand my trip truth, I swear.

[Jean]

No, no, that's crazy. We gonna get them, though. We gonna do, like. We thinking about doing a show in Milwaukee. We were just talking about it. We still having problems doing a show on Milwaukee because we don't know, like, how big we want the venue to be. And when we have that show in Milwaukee, I want you to invite all your ex friends.

[Guest Female]

No.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Guest Male]

No, no, no.

[Jean]

This is what we gonna do. We're gonna be like, oh, this just crashed on his podcast. And it'll be like, oh, y' all just won. Y' all come up on stage and we gonna beat the fuck out of them.

[Mike]

Y' all gonna jump them.

[Jean]

No, no, no, not us. We're gonna hire some people to join because they women, though.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Jean]

So if you see somebody with a wig on that look like me, that's my sister. I'm about to give my sister to beat your ass. You just come out with a wig on. Where are you at? My brother said, Wait, how you know all this information? Y' all got the same tats. Yeah, that's my n. That's my twin brother we locked in. Nobody playing with you. Oh, man.

[Pat]

Did you see I'm trying to get hooked up to the Rodecaster right now? But, Paul Pierce, can we just sniff

[Jean]

the big line of coke audio listeners?

[Pat]

That's what we were talking before. We get to that, too, how easy it would be if we actually did coke.

[Jean]

Okay. So a lot of people don't know. Like, we do our podcast in the high rise. Like, we gotta go past a lot of people. Like, you might. We might catch the elevator up with some people. We got a concierge. So it's like walking past our concierge and then coming right back to him three minutes later, kind of raised some suspicion. He like, damn, I just said bye to you, and you already back, and you now he's probably, like, sniffing. It's Just like if we did coke, we wouldn't have to leave the studio. Just think about it. It probably be a different podcast.

[Mike]

That's how them Diddy parties started.

[Jean]

You think so? With coke? I don't think so. I don't think Diddy was high, bro. I think he was pretty sober in those things.

[Pat]

No, he definitely was a little high. He used to do the little. The little pills. Oh, he did? Yeah.

[Guest Female]

Yeah.

[Jean]

Well, he need to take another pill.

[Pat]

Viagra plus, he need that.

[Guest Female]

He need.

[Jean]

He need the vacuum pump. Need everything. Then they need to make a. A dick protein shake.

[Pat]

Think of this.

[Jean]

I'm everything you need.

[Pat]

One of them clowns that be making those balloons.

[Jean]

He need everything. Need everything. Put everything in that cup. Anything that's need. Honey packs, rhino pills, Ashwagandha.

[Pat]

Oh, man, all these, man, we got. We got Paul Pierce. God damn.

[Jean]

God damn.

[Pat]

My bad, my bad. We got Paul Pierce complaining about streamers right now.

[Guest Male]

You know. You know what?

[Pat]

I'm mad, though.

[Guest Male]

I'm calling out all you goddamn streamers. I'm calling out all you other who ain't got no talent getting money. This is what y' all doing because y' all really nerds in real life, and y' all going out here spending money on these chicks because y' all couldn't get them in real life because y' all weak. And y' all only popular because, oh, y' all getting money off of this and that, and y'.

[Mike]

All.

[Guest Male]

Y' all ain't got no game. So y' all going out here and putting the price of. Of a girl up to a certain level to where now all you got all these girls out here thinking that they can get. Get dollars like that. That's why she said that shit like that. When you got cats out here like,

[Jean]

hey, yeah, yeah, give you a hundred

[Guest Male]

thousand, two hundred million. This is weak. Oh, y' all getting mad at y' all getting y' all money, but, like, y' all driving the price up too much. To where Y' all got these girls out here all in their head thinking

[Jean]

they could just like, okay, ain't this nigga married?

[Pat]

I don't know. But this all stemmed from the only fan girl, Sophie Rain, on a Vlad interview, saying that an NBA player offered her $15 million. Just which is a. It's a lie. She's known for lying about a lot of things like her age and all that stuff. So Paul Pierce is reacting to that. And him saying that the streamers are driving the price up is kind of crazy, because I think NBA Players have been driving the price up for years for tricking. Yes. The streamers. Don't I.

[Jean]

No, I. I feel him, what he's talking about with the streamers, because I. You say the NBA players have been doing that for years. Most of those NBA players was married or in a relationship, so they doing that under the table, and nobody's hearing about it. The streamers are doing it, like, publicly. And they like, okay, I got five girls here, and I paid them $1,000 each. Now he's saying that. I'm not agreeing with him, but he's saying, like, a woman watching that now. Now is like, not going to Paul Pierce poker parties.

[Pat]

But I don't. I don't think streamers even pay. I think the women that be in their streams are. They treat that as, like, a funnel. I think they're going on their streams to promote themselves. Yeah, this is cloud spending. They're spending money, but not as much as NBA players are spending. Not as much as rappers.

[Jean]

But it's publicized, though. It's publicized on the streamer just like,

[Pat]

because, bro, Paul Pierce was in a. On a stream live. This nigga was streaming him with strippers and shit. But strippers, though, which lost him his job that he makes money.

[Jean]

But he paid them, though.

[Pat]

Yeah, but still. That's exactly what I'm saying.

[Jean]

But he's saying the price going up. I don't think he complaining about the actual payment. He's saying, like, the price is going up for the women to do the bare.

[Pat]

Drake just brought. Brought a girl. $200 Maybach.

[Jean]

That's Drake. He different. He's out like that.

[Mike]

Some of these dudes out here just lame now. And they're using their money in order to get these women to do whatever.

[Pat]

They're using their clout, though.

[Mike]

Clout.

[Pat]

Because a lot of these girls. Some of these girls. Those girls would be on this stream are only fan girls, and they make a decent amount of money. And their thing is a funnel. They want to go on the stream, which gets me more money. You don't have to pay me that. I'm already gonna get paid.

[Jean]

Sometimes I get paid, but I'm sorry.

[Pat]

I know. Sometimes I don't think it's like a thousand dollars. Come on, now.

[Jean]

Also, I don't. But I don't like the. What Paul Pierce say about, like, dudes being lame. Like, what the is lame and like, what is using your money? Because if. If somebody in NBA, right.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Jean]

Basketball is known as probably, like, the coolest sport you could play. Right. Because they don't have to play with any equipment on.

[Caller]

They sing.

[Jean]

You don't have to do anything. Like, rough. And like football, you got to go tackle a nigga. You might get truck. Like, it's hard to be, like, finesse. Basketball is one of those things that's deemed as.

[Pat]

You wear a helmet.

[Jean]

Yeah, but I. Some of the NBA players I've met, like, no offense. Are some of the lamest niggas I've ever met in my life. And it's just because they play basketball that is deemed as cool and is, like, not as cool that he get the. He get to take the girl to the game and he get to do this and that. But when a streamer that looks nerdy. And we can tell by some of his mannerisms, he's nerdy. He's lame now because he acts a different way. Because Neon's paying. What's the difference between Neon and a rookie NBA player that's paying for girls to be around them? Yeah, they're the same person, bro. Neither one of them could get that girl without the money. And that's the case for a lot of these people. But that's okay, though.

[Mike]

I think everybody needs to just go back to. Not even everybody. I think the guys should just go back to Mac and a girl. Like, use that mouthpiece. I don't think y'.

[Carrie]

All.

[Mike]

I don't think y' all know how to do that no more.

[Pat]

No, I'm retired.

[Jean]

Yeah. Yeah, I'm retired. I can't.

[Guest Male]

I can't speak.

[Jean]

But I will say back in my

[Guest Female]

day,

[Pat]

but a couple years ago.

[Jean]

Come on now, Come on now. Come on now. I, I, you know, I. I could do a lot with nothing. You know what I mean? I was doing it when I ain't had no car, no crib. Baby, let's take the bus together Let me show you my world. Yeah, let's. I'm the dude listening to most death and sharing a headphone with the girl on the bus. Talk about, baby, we gonna make it out of. Just gotta make it.

[Pat]

But no, I think that is true, too. I feel like everybody has their own level also of tricking, in a sense.

[Guest Male]

Yeah.

[Pat]

I think everybody. Guys, in a sense, kind of always trick. I just think tricking has a negative connotation to it. Yeah. Because it's like. It's just like courting a girl. So if I. I'm courting a girl and we go out to dinner, right? And I pay for the dinner, and then maybe I. I go to Toronto, I get her A gift. I said, oh, I think you would like this perfume that I saw in this other different country or something like that. And I gave her that. Is that still tricking?

[Mike]

I think it. It depends on the presentation. Like, that sounds like a thoughtful gift. Like, oh, I think you would like the way that this smells. I would want to smell this on you. If you just like a shorty. So send me some feet pics or something, and I'mma buy you X, Y and Z, then that's a little different.

[Jean]

So you saying the conversations in between matters if it's tricking or not. But that's. I feel like that's unfair then, because it's like some people, if you dating somebody or talking to a girl, where it's like, oh, we on the same page, then that that woman is already doing those things. Like, if a woman comes over and she cooks and cleans for you, and then you like, hey, thanks for cooking and cleaning. She like, oh, I'm about to go shopping, and the dude gives her $500 to go shopping. That's still tricking.

[Mike]

What's his intentions with her, though?

[Jean]

It don't. It don't matter. She don't know yet.

[Mike]

I don't think it's tricking.

[Jean]

It's only trick. You saying it's tricking. So if it's tricking to do have to talk to multiple women? Is that where it's coming? Like, where's the tricking come multiple women?

[Mike]

If you know that she don't want you for nothing other than just your money? That's another one.

[Jean]

But you can say that for. You can say that for any relationship. Would your partner be with you if you weren't providing the said thing that they met you with? Like, if.

[Mike]

I guess you gotta go broke to find out.

[Jean]

Yes. What if I go broken? I got no morassing to spend on you.

[Mike]

Pick me up on the corner.

[Jean]

Come on now. But you know what I'm saying? But also, like, to. To that extent, like, what if somebody came up and challenged, like, one of us, like, stop what y' all doing, and then see what y' all partner do? Nigga, I'd be looking at my partner crazy if she didn't want to leave me if I drop. You know what I'm saying? If I did, like, come on now, you gotta go and get it.

[Pat]

Yeah, it's. It's hard to always prove because, like, say one, the podcast falls, like, off the face of the earth and knock on wood and pass that something to get us canceled. And then I Try to do the podcast with Vince staple and this fails miserably and he will wait on you. No, we want to get Vince on the pod. But what was I even trying to get at with that? But would our girls still, like, be with us? I think yes. If you show an ambition of trying to bounce back.

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pat]

So that's like the difference. Like, if you, if you lost every. To the. If you lost everything today, what will you do? You're going to just sulk and like, oh, shit. Being bum or hobo sexual.

[Jean]

But they got homosexual crazy. But they got. But they got to know that it's a, It's a difference. It depends, you know, I'm saying it's just like, how did you get to where you got like. Especially if your partner can see that lineage is like, okay, I'm not gonna leave you after your podcast fall off because I believe, like, the way you had the podcast, it was based off your personality, and your personality is gonna take you further. But if you got a bunch of features at the beginning of your music career and then your girl said you ain't had a hit in two years, like, yeah, she might leave. You know what I'm saying?

[Mike]

See, that's why I stand firmly on the fact that we should not be going after people just off of what they have. It should be based off of their character. Because depending on your character, you will be able to bounce back and have that ambition to build yourself back up again if you were to lose it all.

[Jean]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shake something. The girl talking about my character is so good. Yeah, yeah, Let me see that character

[Caller]

development.

[Jean]

No, but that's, but my, my thing was like, looking at how someone is going to elevate in life and being able to see like their end goal and being excited for the end goal. And also seeing that's like with my girl is like seeing her end goal, like what she wants to do at the end of her life and like, what's like the, the peak. And then seeing like, oh, damn, she working pretty hard for this and she's pretty talented on her way to that. But being around somebo who got like this big ass goal and then you see them like not go towards it every day, it just be like, nah, yeah, come on now turn around and let me.

[Mike]

Let's trick on it.

[Jean]

No, but I don't believe, like, tricking is so weird because I feel like the ultimate tricking is being a boyfriend or a fiance or a husband. That's the ultimate tricking because you have one Woman who's a. Who's expect stuff out of you. When the last time you paid for a meal?

[Mike]

We paid together.

[Jean]

When who we.

[Mike]

We pay together.

[Jean]

Y' all got a joint bank account?

[Mike]

Technically, yeah, we do.

[Jean]

No, that's. But I'm just saying, it's just like, that's the ultimate cause, the daily money. Because, like, let's say if I was single and I was tricking, right? I'm only talking to, like, three girls in a month, right? Let's say I gave them all a thousand dollars that month. That's $3,000. They happy as hell. That', rent, blah, blah. If I got a girlfriend, I'm giving her $300 every day somehow, you know what I'm saying? You like giving out money different, though.

[Pat]

That.

[Jean]

No, that's tricking. That's the ultimate form of tricking is being boyfriend. It's a humiliation ritual.

[Pat]

I definitely saved.

[Jean]

Humiliated.

[Pat]

I feel like I definitely.

[Jean]

I love my girl.

[Pat]

I've definitely saved money. Being in a relationship, I feel like you save more money.

[Mike]

Yeah, because she cooks, right?

[Pat]

Yeah, well, not even that.

[Jean]

I'm just saying any.

[Pat]

The thing is misogynistic. I'm just saying in general, for you.

[Guest Female]

For you.

[Pat]

For single guys, they're going on dates a lot. And, you know, sometimes a guy is, like, always deemed to pay for a meal or whatever, especially in the. In the courting stage. So it's like, a lot of money going out. That's more.

[Jean]

I reflected on the balance between the two, honestly, like. But in my single life, I've been like, you know, went through the month, looked at my finances, like, all right, you know, like, I was out chilling, kicking it. You know, this is gone, whatever. And then, like, you start, you know, I started kicking it with a shorty, and I was like, all right, like, this month's a little different. Yeah, but it's the same, you know? And you kind of, like, kind of.

[Pat]

No, it's definitely cheaper, bro.

[Jean]

No, no, but.

[Pat]

Because you're not. Because you're not doing, like, the. I feel like gifts with your girl is a lot simpler. You can get her flowers.

[Jean]

You said when you live with her, you can't count that. We talking about, like, you. Y' all just started dating.

[Pat]

Why are you giving all these things?

[Jean]

We're talking on the real people. You talking about people together in general.

[Pat]

You can get flowers, right? You can do gestures. You can do acts of kindness. And those are still gifts, and you don't have to spend any money on them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jean]

It's just too much energy.

[Mike]

I feel like single or be in a relationship and get somebody that's loyal to you who don't mind doing 50, 50, 80, 20, 40, 60 or whatever and call it a day.

[Jean]

I just think that summer always changes how I get dressed. I find myself reaching for pieces that feel lighter or more breathable and outfits that are easy but still look good put together. That's why I keep coming back to Quince. They focus on high qual quality essentials that feel good and look amazing without luxury markup. With fabrics like breathable linen and soft organic cotton, you can feel elevated without the effort.

[Pat]

Quince European linen pants and shirts are the perfect warm weather upgrade to add to your rotation. Starting at just $34. Lightweight, breathable and comfortable, but you still look put together. Everything is priced 50 to 80% less than what you'll find in similar brands. Quince works directly with ethical factories, cuts out the middleman. So you're getting a premium materials without the markup. And Quinn's goes way beyond just clothing. From custom upholstered sofas, ceramic cookware to premium bedding. It's the kind of brand you end up recommending to everyone for everything.

[Jean]

So recently I picked up one of the linen shirts and it's been my go to for a while. It's soft, breathable and has made getting dressed in the summer pretty easy. And it didn't cost what I think a shirt like that would. Overall is really a great fit. You can elevate your summer wardrobe. Go to quince.com crash for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N c e.com crash for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com crash don't forget, get there.

[Pat]

Your paycheck date could soon become the most irrelevant number in your life. Earnings A non Bank Finance app. 5 million people and growing. The concept is almost annoyingly simple. You earn money, you access it. Getting paid twice a month doesn't mean money is scarce, it just feels that way. Up to $150 a day of what you've already worked for. Up to $1,000 between paychecks. Tips are optional and standard transfers take one to two business days with no mandatory fees. Expedited transfers start at $3.99 and cap at $5.99. It's not about emergencies, it's just a better way to exist financially. Day to day Worth checking out.

[Jean]

So recently I just went on Apple TV and I saw the Michael Jackson movie and I clicked it right away and was able to watch it. Think about how wild it is that we work, then wait, then get paid. That's a deal we just accepted, but you can literally go to anything else instantly. Just like I did with the Michael Jackson movie. Five million people have already made the switch. At this point, the old way is starting to look like the weird option

[Pat]

Download earning on the App Store or Google Play Store spelled like earning money without the G. Type in Crash Dummies under Podcast when you sign up. It'll really help the show. Mandatory disclaimers 1. Earnings a financial technology company, not a bank 2. Access limits are based on your earnings and risk factors. Standard Cash outs take one to two business days with no mandatory fees 3. Expedite transfers available for a fee. Tips are voluntary and don't affect the service and four available in select states. Terms and restrictions apply. Visit Earnin.com for full details. It is a percentage thing.

[Jean]

Like it's too much Summer always changes how I get dressed. I find myself reaching for pieces that feel lighter or more breathable and outfits that are easy but still look good put together. That's why I keep coming back to Quints. They focus on high quality essentials that feel good and look amazing without luxury markup. With fabrics like breathable linen and soft organic cotton, you can feel elevated without the effort.

[Pat]

Quince European linen pants and shirts are the perfect warm weather upgrade to add to your rotation. Starting at just $34. Lightweight, breathable and comfortable, but you still look put together. Everything is priced 50 to 80% less than what you find in similar brands. Quince works directly with ethical factories, cuts out the middleman so you're getting a premium materials without the markup. And Quince goes way beyond just clothing. From custom upholstered sofas, ceramic cookware to premium bedding, it's the kind of brand you end up recommending to everyone for everything.

[Jean]

So recently I picked up one of their linen shirts and it's been my go to for a while. It's soft, breathable and has made getting dressed in the summer pretty easy. Easy and it didn't cost what I think a shirt like that would. Overall is really a great fit. You can elevate your summer wardrobe. Go to quince.com crash for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N c e.com crash for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com crash. Don't forget. Get there.

[Pat]

Mine's a percentage thing.

[Jean]

What do you mean by that?

[Pat]

Like my income, my girl's income. And then we based it on percentage. So we're basically taking the same kind of hit in a way, in a sense.

[Jean]

Mine is. Save as much money as you can. Because when I need that bank account, I'm taking it. You don't need to spend nothing. Don't spend nothing. Go out to eat, vacation. You good, you good. All that money better be saved. And it better be 10 racks there when I need it. Cause the mob after us. My bad, baby. I bet on the spurs it was up 29. Who knew? This nigga.

[Pat]

That's the thing about having a girl too. They're. They're real big savers.

[Jean]

Yes.

[Pat]

They. They. You guys are really big savers for a rainy day. Yes. Because I live my life like dayto day. And then, you know, that's why I have a joint account too. But I also have my own account that, you know, I have my own account too.

[Jean]

I will. I will say. I will say. So this is. This is where I was thinking. I was saying, like being in a relationship, especially in a dating phase, it's like that. It's like that. That gray area before y' all start living together and start looking at each other like, hey, let's save for this together. But there's that one area where y' all like boyfriend and girlfriend and y' all going out on dates every day. But like, when you're. When you're single, you can bow out every time. You know what I'm saying? You could be like, man, yeah, I came. Man, my uncle died and just disappeared for three weeks. Invest elsewhere.

[Pat]

We got Haha Davis on Shannon Sharper's podcast, revealing some. Some things about himself. I don't know if it is true

[Guest Male]

or not because they're the grew up

[Pat]

in it when anytime a interviewer says, I don't know this is true or not, they already know it's true. So. And when there was traditional.

[Guest Male]

Yeah.

[Jean]

Her and him.

[Caller]

Right.

[Jean]

Somewhere along the line, they were allowed to have another.

[Guest Male]

A her.

[Pat]

A her and a him.

[Guest Male]

Yeah. When did that happen? Ha ha. Were you saying you said you sound like a throttle? Yeah, yeah. I'm asking.

[Jean]

I mean, how?

[Guest Male]

I mean. Cause I'm just trying to figure it out.

[Jean]

How you even broach that subject?

[Guest Male]

Yeah, yeah. You like, hey, girl, you don't care. You know I love you, but I was just thinking. Yeah, what you thinking?

[Jean]

What you thinking, Carlos? You know, I was Thinking, you know, shit, man, you know, I love. Hey, you know it's always gonna be me and you.

[Pat]

Listen, no matter what happens, it gonna be us.

[Guest Male]

Yeah, but I ain't gonna lie. Me and my girl have indulged in that though.

[Pat]

Y' all haven't.

[Guest Male]

We have. Like, just try to keep me happy. Like we've done those swinging. They call it swinging. Yeah, we did a little swinging.

[Jean]

She agreed to it.

[Guest Male]

Yeah, he did a little swinging. But oh, Lord dang is you don't want nobody else doing it to your lady. That's what I'm saying though.

[Jean]

So what did she say with.

[Pat]

Hey, hey, hey, Carlos, what do you think about like people going on Shannon Sharp's podcast and revealing like information like that?

[Jean]

If we, if we listen to the rest of the clip, can we listen?

[Pat]

Yeah, I got you. Because I didn't know if it was like too long winded.

[Jean]

Nah, it's cool.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Jean]

They chilling.

[Guest Male]

Get the hell off of me. I've just seen that man put you. I'm talking about he. Look, he didn't turn your way, but loose. I didn't leopard with him.

[Jean]

You hear me?

[Guest Male]

Cool. Because it was like, like when you like, you want to have fun, you want to have fun in your life. That was. You know what I mean?

[Jean]

That was a one time thing though, right?

[Pat]

Oh, of course.

[Guest Male]

I would never allow that to happen to you.

[Jean]

I like, I honestly believe, like, no, no offense to like haha. And like, obviously his great accomplishments landed him a type of interview on like Shannon Sharpe. But I believe that's a joke. I don't, I don't believe that's true. And I'd be like, because that's crazy.

[Pat]

But at what cost though?

[Jean]

To propel him maybe into whatever he got coming next? Because I remember he was just recently going through a hard time on the Internet.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Jean]

He posted that skit with the flamethrower and people was not feeling that like,

[Pat]

I mean, wrap it up or some like.

[Jean]

Yeah, it was like going viral for him to wrap it up. Like, you know what I mean? Like it was going more violent skit. So I think that's a bit. And that's a joke because I just don't believe you embarrass your wife like that. That, that's crazy.

[Mike]

I mean, I don't think it. He looks at it as embarrassing.

[Pat]

Yeah, he don't.

[Jean]

He said that about his wife. Yes, his wife.

[Pat]

His girl. Okay.

[Jean]

This is girl that he been with.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Regardless, it don't sound like nothing new in the industry.

[Pat]

No. It don't. It don't sound like there's a lot of swingers swing.

[Mike]

I mean, I don't know. Allegedly, Will and Jada, you know, Like, I don't think it's looked at in a bad light anymore how it used to be. So maybe from his perspective, he's like,

[Jean]

yeah, but the Will and Jada thing is not. That's not a good comparison, though.

[Mike]

Why?

[Jean]

Because they're swinging as, like, hey, we're a couple, but we're both, like, on opposite sides of the world or the nation doing this and that. As long as you tell me about who you're hooking up with or who you're getting a relationship, that's fine. He's saying his girlfriend is having sex right next to him.

[Caller]

That's crazy.

[Jean]

And he's watching, and then he's telling that to the masses. It's just like, that's not a good joke to me. I get, like, swinging either. That's like orgy.

[Pat]

Yeah, no, that. That is the definition of swinging. It's like the same room.

[Jean]

Yeah, yeah, definitely. Definitely a type of swinging. Yeah, but that is usually, like, going on at the same time.

[Caller]

Like.

[Jean]

Yeah, you start with your partner, and then you mix and match. Like, halfway through that.

[Pat]

So you heard, huh? So you've heard.

[Jean]

No, no, no, no, no. Wait a minute.

[Pat]

No. But everybody has their own thing. I'm not shaming the. The swinging part. It's just the. The being so open about it where it's just like. I don't know. I just feel like everybody's sex life, if you're not really trying to educate people about it and, like, how you. You know, then it's like, why are you really talking about it?

[Jean]

I just feel like, you know, because

[Pat]

it just seems like you're trying to get a clip from it.

[Jean]

Exactly. He expressed that he learned from it. You know, that.

[Pat]

I guess that is a learning thing.

[Jean]

It's not like he was like, oh, who's next?

[Mike]

And he's a comedian, so he might have just been. It could have been truthful. But he's also trying to get a joke up out of it anyway, because I could hear him doing that. Like. Like, if he does stand up.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jean]

Everybody knows. Like, it's hard. Like, obviously, she hasn't been on camera, but I guarantee the next time he takes a picture with her.

[Pat]

No, she's been on camera.

[Jean]

No, I'm just saying since the interview.

[Pat]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Jean]

She hasn't been on camera or had a picture since the interview. But the Next time she posts something or the next time they see her on his page, it's gonna be something. And as when people look as a man, they don't really think about that. They just like, ah, you let your girl, blah, blah, blah. But like when they. A woman gets it way harder and people gonna be in her comments. I don't think he thought about her psyche.

[Mike]

Do you think she cares?

[Jean]

She might not care right now.

[Pat]

No. I think that's why I said I didn't know why that that thing was to be propelled because you see how people kind of are, are on Adam 22 and his wife right now. And like the, the whole Adam 22 is a cuck type of thing. So I think that even though swinging is not technically being a cuck, but it almost is like, like cuck adjacent in a sense when you're kind of walking, watching your girl get have sex with somebody. But that's your kink. That's your kink. Yeah, but everybody has their own kink. So with that it's like, I don't know how that would have propelled his career or that joke would have propelled his career.

[Jean]

I. I kind of get where you coming from. And then I also get where Carrie is coming from. It is like, if he's going into stand up, then yeah, okay, if you are, he better have something already. Like, you say some shit like that, it got to be some shit by this weekend, my nigga. Like, you can't say some shit like that, Let it drop and then don't have nothing after it. So you just went on a Shannon Sharpe interview and didn't drop nothing. So it got to be something coming.

[Pat]

So my next question is that. Do you think Shannon already knew that, that he was going to say that when he presented the question? Because he was like, I don't know how they do it. You know, like when he says like, I don't know, whatever, and people present something like that.

[Mike]

He definitely could have been lobbing it up for sure.

[Pat]

He definitely. Because Shannon does do a lot of the lobbying and his react kind of funny too. He was like, oh, really?

[Jean]

He was definitely, he was definitely lobbing it up. And he actually, because I've done that plenty of times, there's been plenty of times where I'm trying to lob you up something and I don't want to be too specific to what you're saying, so it doesn't sound fake, but the adjacent thing I'm saying doesn't really make sense. In a way, you turn the story over Sounds like a plan. Because he was talking about a throuple.

[Pat]

Yes.

[Jean]

So I think Shannon, like, he knew what he wanted to say, but in his head it didn't go over the way he thought it was. He was like, what do you think about thruffles? And he's just like. And then ha had to change it. Like, oh, I ain't tried throuple, but I tried swinging before. Which is like way different. So definitely. He definitely knew that shit. Because there's no way you just ask a random man about trouble. Out of all people, I'm as haha Davis about thruffles I've never even heard of. Like, come on now. Maybe he.

[Pat]

Maybe I missed it. Maybe he's talked about it it before.

[Jean]

Yeah.

[Caller]

Hello. Yo, yo, yo, what's up, crap dummies? Chilling. What's up, man?

[Pat]

Should chill it. Oh, I got a question for you.

[Caller]

What's up?

[Pat]

What's something that you stopped doing that made you feel better?

[Caller]

Yeah, I started being a better man and start cheating, bro. Changed my life.

[Pat]

How to change your life, bro? When'd you stop cheating?

[Caller]

Two weeks ago.

[Pat]

Okay, what made you stop two weeks ago?

[Caller]

My girl stopped making me mad. I only cheat when she make me mad.

[Jean]

What is. What is your definition of making you mad, bro?

[Caller]

You know, just nagging like that.

[Jean]

What does she nag about?

[Caller]

So say like. Like the other day, we was. The other day, I had just told her basically like, you know, I'm cool, I'm straight, I ain't mad at you, I don't want to argue. And she still called attitude. So I'm like, what the.

[Jean]

What was the argument about? Why. Why are you bowing out the argument?

[Caller]

It wasn't even no argument. It was like she was telling me that she was mad about something and I was like, you know, all right, I understand. And she thought I was mad once I said that. But, you know, I'm like, I ain't even mad. And she thought I was mad. So it went from there.

[Jean]

So because you one worded her because you only you ain't getting no explanation. He's like, I understand, yo.

[Caller]

That that's what it be. I won't word it.

[Jean]

But you knew that would piss her off though. You could tell. So you basically nagged her in a way. So you like baited her into nagging and then you cheated on her. So you pump fake. She followed you and you shot two free throws and you blaming it on her.

[Pat]

You. So the only reason you stop cheating is because she doesn't get on your Nerves anymore. So if she gets on your nerves, are you gonna cheat?

[Caller]

Hell, no. Because it feels good being. It feel good being a lawyer, man. Okay, I'm done.

[Pat]

Has she gotten on your nerves and you haven't cheated yet since then, the two weeks?

[Jean]

Hell, yeah.

[Caller]

She just got on my nerves earlier.

[Jean]

Okay, you ain't got the. What's the. So what's. So what's the difference between this urge now and the urge then?

[Caller]

Because now it's like, n. It's like, I understand now. Like, I understand that ain't cheating. Ain't the way to, you know, go. That ain't. That's some little boy, you know, that ain't right.

[Jean]

Like, that's how dudes talk when they side girl lead them. Yo side girl fed up. She tired of your.

[Caller]

Then you know, you might be right.

[Jean]

Kind of.

[Caller]

You know, she did kind of tell me she done with me.

[Jean]

Oh, my God, that's terrible. No, you crazy, bro.

[Pat]

Are you trying to switch to FBI? Just go grab it now. All right, we'll be right back.

[Jean]

Showing you.

[Caller]

All right, I got some. I'm trying to get my damn service right.

[Guest Female]

My bad.

[Jean]

We trying to get our service right, too.

[Pat]

I was saying be careful now. Does your girl know you were cheating?

[Caller]

No, I don't. Nah. Hell no. What kind of question that I don't get cold.

[Jean]

Never been caught before.

[Pat]

I feel it. I feel it.

[Jean]

No, we. So we doing live shows. Everybody know. Sorry. We about to do a quick commercial, but we're gonna use you for the commercial. Is that okay?

[Caller]

Yeah, yeah. That's trick.

[Jean]

Okay, roll. Let's roll into this. I'm ready. Producers, we ready. Roll inside. Let's roll. Yo, y' all know we doing live shows, and we got live people on the line right now. My guy just finished a call about something else, and he gonna tell us where. Where he from. And then we gonna give away our first live tickets. Y' all about to see it here in the flesh. Yo, what's good, bro?

[Caller]

Yo, what's up?

[Jean]

Yo, what's good? What's good? Where you from?

[Caller]

I'm from Jacksonville, Florida.

[Jean]

Yes. So y' all know. Y' all know we actually coming to Florida. We got Miami, Orlando, Tampa. We about to give. What's your. You live in Jacksonville, Florida? What's high rep your real quick?

[Caller]

South side.

[Pat]

South side.

[Jean]

South side of Jacksonville, Florida. We better get him free two free tickets to the live show.

[Pat]

You gotta. You got a car, though, to get there or you need a ride?

[Caller]

No, I ain't got no car.

[Pat]

No, Car.

[Jean]

No car.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Pat]

No. Okay. You ever owned the car?

[Caller]

Nope.

[Pat]

Nope. Okay. It. No car.

[Jean]

About to give him a free. We about to pick him up, so we gonna. That's this. Our next sponsor is Uber. We. We gonna Uber black him to the show no matter where he at.

[Caller]

Sound like y' all trying to set me up,

[Pat]

bro.

[Jean]

Can we finish up?

[Pat]

Oh, my gosh, bro. No.

[Jean]

We always start over, bro. Damn, bro, that was good.

[Carrie]

That was.

[Jean]

I was killing it.

[Pat]

That was good, bro.

[Jean]

I was killing it. All right, all right. No, he gonna.

[Guest Male]

He good.

[Jean]

He go. We gotta keep him because the next person might up, too.

[Pat]

At least he knows he sounds short, though.

[Jean]

Nah, I don't think so.

[Caller]

Nah. Six foot.

[Pat]

Six foot?

[Jean]

Hell no.

[Caller]

Y. Six foot?

[Jean]

Hell no.

[Caller]

Swear to God.

[Jean]

Hell no.

[Caller]

Swear to God. I'm six foot.

[Jean]

You play football?

[Caller]

Nah, basketball and baseball.

[Jean]

Basketball.

[Pat]

How old are you?

[Jean]

That probably got dreads and 24. Jacksonville to play basketball. Definitely got dreads.

[Caller]

I ain't got no.

[Jean]

Yes, you do, bro.

[Caller]

No, I ain't got no dread.

[Jean]

What you got? Let me see.

[Caller]

You got a little fro.

[Pat]

A little fro.

[Caller]

Okay, all right.

[Jean]

Okay.

[Guest Male]

You.

[Jean]

You.

[Guest Male]

Y'.

[Guest Female]

All.

[Jean]

You probably trash in high school, though.

[Caller]

No, no, but I. I ain't gonna lie to you. I tried to take a different route, but that ain't work out.

[Jean]

No, I used my. I'm not gonna look up your stats. What high school you go to?

[Pat]

They try to get a double charge look.

[Jean]

I miss that. What high school you go to? I ain't gonna say your name on here. What high school?

[Caller]

I went to Rain.

[Jean]

To Rain. What's it called?

[Caller]

Reigns. William and Reigns.

[Jean]

Oh, okay, okay. That's all the info we need. I appreciate you, bro.

[Caller]

Damn. Damn, y'. All. That slick. Cap slip.

[Jean]

You going down, brother.

[Pat]

All right, bro. You have a good one, bro.

[Caller]

That's good. I with the same, man. I with the part, bro. Y' all keep going up, man.

[Pat]

No, I appreciate you, bro. Enjoy while it last, too, bro.

[Jean]

You keep going down.

[Pat]

All right, have a good one.

[Caller]

Yeah, you too.

[Carrie]

All right.

[Jean]

Got his ass.

[Caller]

Yo, what's up?

[Jean]

Welcome to Crash Podcast. What's good, broski?

[Caller]

My bad. Can y' all hear me? I take my brother out.

[Jean]

Yeah, yeah, we heard you. No, you. You a hoe, bro. I just, like, sometimes when we. No, sometimes when we call people and then it's like, you call them us. Freaky Mike and Freaky Pat. Just, like, out of, like, just for no reason.

[Caller]

Just straight glazing, it'd be like that.

[Jean]

Anywho, all Right. I got a question for you, bro.

[Caller]

All right. What's up?

[Jean]

What's the worst date you've ever been on?

[Caller]

Worst date I ever been on. Let's see. So my. My favorite restaurant used to be the Cheesecake Factory, and I took my ex there, paid for the whole thing. We had an expensive pasta and even had cheesecake everything. Halfway through the day, she's, you know, I'm like, what's. What's going on? You're not paying attention to me. Am I doing something wrong? She's like, no, I'm just chilling the whole time. You can see the reflection of her phone through her fat ass. Glasses look like she got monocles on, but you can literally see the conversation with somebody, and all I see is a shirtless dude immediately shut down. I think that's probably the worst because I. Like, she knew how important the Cheesecake Factory was to me, and we've been wanting to go there for the longest time, and the whole time, she's sitting there talking to somebody else.

[Jean]

What.

[Pat]

Why is it so important to you?

[Caller]

Because it was. It's my favorite restaurant. I had never, like, that was the first time I had actually been there.

[Pat]

Are you. That was your.

[Caller]

Besides with my. Like, I gone with. You know, with, like, my dad or whatever.

[Jean]

So this is, like, your first time going as a grown man? He, like, oh, perfect time to take a date there.

[Caller]

Exactly. I was. I think I was. I was 20. She was 19, and she had.

[Jean]

It was a life. It was a picture of a shirtless dude. That's what you saw in her glasses.

[Caller]

That's why. Because she. She has glasses, but she acts like she's blind, so she got to keep the phone, like, super close to her face, but you can see what's on there. All I see is a. Without a shirt. So I was like, all right.

[Jean]

But what if you're mistaken, though? What if, like, her. Her friend sent her a picture of a dude without a shirt on?

[Caller]

You know, I never actually did think about that. I. I'm so. Context. I'm 27 now. I was 20 then. I was immature. I just. First thing I thought, that's it. That's all. So I immediately thought she was talking to somebody. So I was like, all right, cool.

[Pat]

Did you say anything?

[Caller]

No, I got. I. I kind of. Back then, I was.

[Pat]

And this is before this.

[Caller]

I'm not even gonna lie.

[Pat]

This is before y' all ordered food.

[Caller]

No, we were halfway done with the pasta by this time.

[Jean]

But y' all still got dessert?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Pat]

Also, you knew this information and you down. You share some cheesecake with her?

[Caller]

Well, I mean, yes, I was gonna get her her own slice, but I was like, look, what kind do you like? Because we can just get, you know, one slice and just share it. Because she's trying.

[Pat]

She does. She didn't deserve. Ch.

[Jean]

Now he. A cheesecake cup.

[Caller]

Now, see, she. Cheese cup, look, 100%. She definitely didn't deserve that.

[Jean]

But, like, no strawberry.

[Caller]

I wasn't going to miss, I don't know, cheesecake. What you mean, like strawberry cheese cup? And what's funny is we actually had a piece of strawberry cheesecake. You funny as hell for that, Mike.

[Pat]

Oh, that Pat.

[Caller]

I'm sorry. No, that was Mike, that was Pat the Lip.

[Pat]

Oh, my God.

[Caller]

Nah.

[Jean]

What y' all love? Like, what's your love like? Like now. Damn, that's a tongue twister. Right now it.

[Pat]

What's your love?

[Caller]

I've been in a relationship for six months.

[Pat]

Are you been in a relationship for six years?

[Caller]

Yes, currently. Currently.

[Jean]

Oh, how's that going for you?

[Caller]

I think it's going pretty good. I mean, like, there's days where, like, I. I definitely. I feel like maybe I, I. I don't know. Not that, like, I don't want it, but, like, just. I uprooted my whole life, you know, to come be with her, so.

[Jean]

Oh, where'd you, like, how far did you move?

[Caller]

Maybe like, 30, 40 minutes. It's, like, not super far.

[Pat]

Shut the up, bro.

[Jean]

To the outskirts of town, acting like he traveled across the nation.

[Pat]

He said I uprooted my whole life.

[Caller]

Look.

[Pat]

To move 30 minutes away.

[Caller]

Look. Cause look. Cause look where I live. You don't understand. Where I used to live, I was around everybody, you know, all black people. Now I live around a bunch of rednecks. So, like, it feels like a completely different, you know.

[Jean]

What is she? You said, what is she, a quote unquote redneck?

[Caller]

No, she is not. She's just a, you know, a chubby country girl.

[Pat]

Just call your girl chubby?

[Caller]

Yes, because that's the nicest way I can put it. She's not skinny.

[Pat]

I mean, my gosh, bro. These dogs.

[Guest Female]

I don't know how to say.

[Caller]

Look. I don't know how to be nice about it, man.

[Guest Female]

Like.

[Jean]

Or hey. Or don't say it at all. What the.

[Caller]

You right.

[Pat]

Oh, man.

[Caller]

Just a country girl.

[Pat]

Remember when you said you used to be immature and naive and like that?

[Caller]

Let me guess. You think I still am.

[Pat]

Oh, my God, bro.

[Jean]

Hey, even add d to that, too,

[Pat]

being older and dumber. Is the. Is the most dangerous thing.

[Jean]

This got a Benjamin Button brain.

[Caller]

I promise you I've changed.

[Jean]

Oh, man.

[Pat]

All right, bro. You have a good one, man.

[Caller]

All right. You too.

[Pat]

All right. Peace.

[Carrie]

Hello.

[Caller]

Hello. Yo, hey, what up?

[Jean]

What up? My bad, dear. And Fox, bro, If y' all seeing this, man. De' Aaron Fox, you got. We got a bone to pick with you. Go ahead.

[Pat]

Welcome to Crash Podcast.

[Guest Female]

I'm glad to be here.

[Jean]

You don't sound like you're glad to be here. What's wrong?

[Guest Female]

Nothing's wrong. I didn't think you guys were gonna call. I thought it was kind of a

[Pat]

boring answer, but I got you.

[Jean]

You kind of pessimistic. God damn. Give it a chance.

[Guest Female]

I'm giving it a chance. I'm giving a chance.

[Pat]

All right, I got a question for you. What's the worst date you've ever been on?

[Guest Female]

The worst date I've ever been on was with this guy who came into my job. He, like, kind of talked me up, and we swapped information and we went to this, like, rooftop restaurant kind of where we live. And when we got there, he, like, just to start off, I was wearing, like, like, a tight black dress and, like, heels because we were going to, like, a nice restaurant.

[Caller]

I just fly.

[Pat]

Shit.

[Guest Female]

Yeah, whatever. It doesn't matter.

[Carrie]

It was funny.

[Guest Female]

He was wearing, like, really tight jeans and a fucking Under Armour. Like, like, athleisure. Like baby tea. It felt like. Like, it was really, really small. And for reference, he's, like, six three. Like, has to be a minimum 250.

[Pat]

Okay. Was this. Was this the outfit that he normally wears? Is this what you met him in when you asked him on a date?

[Guest Female]

This is not what I met him in.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Carrie]

All right.

[Guest Female]

He is like a. He knew you're gonna. He was a firefighter, so he was wearing, like, firefighter shit.

[Pat]

Oh, he raised you up in the. In the fit. Okay.

[Jean]

You had a little fantasy going on, and you fulfilled it. That's what happened.

[Guest Female]

Go ahead though the crime. No. So we went to this dinner or whatever. I was like, okay, I'm gonna let it go. Like, clothes can change. Like, a man will change what he wears if he likes you.

[Caller]

Whatever.

[Guest Female]

So we get to the dinner, like, the conversation's okay, and he gets the check. And, like, the check has to be, like, over $150. I'm not really looking at it because I purposely try not to. I think it's weird to, like, pocket watch or something. Whatever. So he gets a check. He does the thing. We go to Go, leave. And when I, like, caught a glimpse of the check on the way out, I was like, no way. I saw that, right? So I, like, pretended I left something at the table and, like, circle back. And he didn't tip.

[Pat]

Oh, damn.

[Guest Female]

Like, not even a little bit. And he met me in a service industry job

[Pat]

and his fire outfit

[Guest Female]

and that.

[Pat]

Oh, man, that's some role playing. That. Go ahead.

[Guest Female]

Yeah, so.

[Jean]

Hey, baby, can I get a. Can I get a steak, please? Don't burn it. Don't burn it. Now. I'm have to come put it out.

[Guest Female]

First off, I work at a bar, so there's no food involved.

[Jean]

Oh, okay, okay, okay.

[Pat]

Drinking this firefly.

[Jean]

Let me get a spicy margarita. Hold the fire now.

[Guest Female]

Okay, so. No, you're kidding. I go, and he didn't tip. So I, like, I had cash in my bag from work. I just put some cash down and I walked to the elevator. And when I got to the elevator, I was like, hey, like, did you mean to not tip? And he was like, oh, I thought they automatically added it.

[Pat]

That's a fair excuse.

[Guest Female]

Yeah. So I'm like, okay, I listen. I gave him the benefit of the doubt, so he said, okay, let's go get another drink. So, fine. We go to another place. He had to have ordered four to six drinks between the two of us. Whatever. Had about, like, an $80 tab. He was like, I'm gonna get my check. I'm gonna go to the bathroom, and then we'll leave. He gets the check, he pays, he doesn't tip.

[Jean]

You checked again.

[Pat]

You pocket watching up.

[Guest Female]

He left it there when he went to the bathroom. And, like, I wasn't gonna check, but it's like, it's blank as fuck. Like, I'm looking at it. That shit look white as fuck. I know what it looks like when people write it. Whatever. So I gave them cash. We left. And I'm like, I'm really tired. I just want to go home. He's like, okay, I'm going to walk you to your car. As we're walking in my car, he goes, do you think that you could pick me up?

[Jean]

Like, Like.

[Pat]

Like physically?

[Guest Female]

Like, physically pick him up.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Guest Female]

Like, he wanted me to give him a piggyback ride.

[Pat]

Okay. And I did.

[Carrie]

You.

[Guest Female]

I laughed out loud and I said no, like, repeatedly, over and over again. Like, almost like that movie that just came out. Like, I was like, no, no, no. And I'm like, not only am I not dressed for it, like, I have heels on and a dress and shit.

[Guest Male]

Oh.

[Jean]

He tried to do this while you had heels on. Yeah, it's crazy. And he likes you. Said he's six tall. He said he's six.

[Guest Female]

Three, two, six three. He's got to be a minimum 250.

[Jean]

How tall are you?

[Guest Female]

Probably over. I'm five nine, five ten.

[Jean]

Okay, so you're pretty tall.

[Guest Female]

I'm tall. I'm not. Listen, he got that.

[Jean]

But no, you're pretty tall. I got a question for you.

[Guest Female]

Oh, God.

[Jean]

If I jumped on your back, do you think you could carry. No, listen.

[Guest Female]

Okay. Because he said, do you think you could pick me up? And I said no. Like, I don't even want to try. And honestly, that's not my thing. Like, I don't want to pick my man up. That just doesn't sound like a vibe to me. And instead of, like, hearing me, he put his arms. Like, he came behind me, he put his arms around my neck, and then dead weighted my body.

[Pat]

Oh.

[Jean]

How'd you do, champ? Not well at all. You fell?

[Carrie]

I literally, like.

[Guest Female]

And I didn't fall. Thank God. I didn't fall, but I tried to take, like, a step. The hardest step I've ever taken.

[Jean]

Oh, so you attempted it. You sitting here acting like you didn't participate with us. That's what I don't like.

[Pat]

Because you said you weren't pocket. You said you weren't pocket watching, then you're pocket watching. And then you said you weren't gonna pick him up, and then you actually attempted to.

[Jean]

So my. So our. Our next question is what happened on the second date?

[Guest Female]

We didn't go on a second date.

[Jean]

Why, though?

[Guest Female]

Because he's texted me, like, six times and I didn't respond.

[Pat]

Did you drop him off at home? Oh, no.

[Guest Female]

You said pick him up because he drove separately. He just wanted me to physically pick him up.

[Jean]

Yeah, maybe you didn't pass his test.

[Guest Female]

He's been blowing me up, so I don't think that that's true.

[Jean]

Nah, he probably thought you had some potential. Like, man, I felt this. She didn't have to give up like that. He just wants.

[Pat]

You felt the stride.

[Jean]

He want to see what you can do with some flats. That's it.

[Guest Female]

Yeah. I'm not looking for a personal trainer.

[Pat]

Oh, man.

[Jean]

N. Man.

[Pat]

I mean, it sounds like a good story for a date, though.

[Guest Female]

I'm. It's. Yeah, it's a funny story to tell for sure.

[Pat]

All right, we're going to take another quick break to thank today's sponsor, gld. Fellas, summer is here from festival season. Beach Trips, pool parties, weddings, you name it. This is the time of the year where your fits actually matter. And when you're not hiding under hoodies and jackets anymore, the details really stand out. A Clean Chain and bracelet A clean chain and bracelet can take a basic outfit and make it look complete without even trying. That's why we're rocking with gld. Summer style can get expensive fast, but GLD gives you that elevated look without draining your wallet.

[Jean]

The value is honestly crazy for the quality you're getting. You see the piece I got on? I know y' all like it, I know y' all rocking with it. And this isn't some cheap jewelry that fades after a few wears. God uses real gold. Every stone is handset and the craftsmanship is on another level. You can literally see and feel the difference. If you're trying to level up your summer fish G O D a move. They got everything to chains, pendants, bracelets, even watches. Whether you keep it simple or you like a little shine, they got the perfect piece for you.

[Pat]

And listen, just don't take our word for it. GLD has over 2 million customers and 50,000 five star reviews to back it up. Not to mention it's worn by some of the biggest names out there like Justin Bieber, Michael Parsons, Tyreek Hill, Malik Neighbors, asap, Rocky, and a ton more. The best part? Every single piece is guaranteed for a of lot life. It's a no brainer.

[Jean]

For a limited time only new customers are getting an insane deal. Use code crash to get 40% [e-mail] that's 40% off with code crashod.com after your purchase they will ask you where you heard about them. Please support the show and tell them that we sent you. It's time to lock in and upgrade your style this summer with God. This episode is brought to you by State Farm.

[Mike]

You know those friends who support your preference for podcasts over music on road trips. That's the energy State Farm brings to insurance.

[Jean]

With over 19,000 local agents, they help

[Mike]

you find the coverage that fits your

[Jean]

needs so you can spend less time

[Mike]

worrying about insurance and more time enjoying the ride.

[Jean]

Download the State Farm app or go [e-mail] like a good neighbor. State Farm is there.

[Pat]

All right, you have a good one.

[Caller]

All right.

[Jean]

Swag.

[Pat]

Peace. Your paycheck date could soon become the most irrelevant number in your life. Earnings. A non Bank Finance out 5 million people and growing. The concept is almost annoyingly simple. You earn money, you access it. Getting paid twice a month doesn't mean Money is scarce. It just feels that way. Up to $150 a day of what you've already worked for up to $1,000 between paychecks. Tips are optional and standard transfers take one to two business days with no mandatory fees. Expedited transfers start at $3.99 and cap at $5.99. It's not about emergencies. It's just a better way to exist financially. Day to day Worth checking out so

[Jean]

recently I just went on Apple TV and I saw the Michael Jackson movie and I clicked it right away and was able to watch.

[Pat]

Watch it.

[Jean]

Think about how wild it is that we work, then wait, then get paid. That's a deal we just accepted. But you can literally go to anything else instantly. Just like I did with the Michael Jackson movie. Five million people have already made the switch. At this point, the old way is starting to look like the weird option.

[Pat]

Download earning on the App Store or Google Play Store spelled like earning money without the G. Type in Crash Dummies under podcast when you sign up. It'll really help the show. Mandatory disclaimers 1. Earning is a financial technology company, not a business bank. 2. Access limits are based on your earnings and risk factors. Standard cash outs take one to two business days with no mandatory fees. 3. Expedite transfers available for a fee. Tips are voluntary and don't affect the service. And four available in select states. Terms and restrictions apply. Visit earning.com for full details. All right, we're going to take another quick break to thank today's sponsor, gld. Fellas, summer is here. From festival season, beach trips, pool parties, weddings, you name. This is the time of the year where your fits actually matter. And when you're not hiding under hoodies and jackets anymore, the details really stand out. A clean chain and bracelet. A clean chain and bracelet can take a basic outfit and make it look complete without even trying. That's why we're rocking with gld. Summer style can get expensive fast, but GLD gives you that elevated look without draining your wallet.

[Jean]

The value is honestly crazy for the quality you're getting. You see the piece I got on? I know y' all like it. I know y' all rocking with it it. And this isn't some cheap jewelry that fades after a few wears. God uses real gold. Every stone is handset. And the craftsmanship is on another level. You can literally see and feel the difference. If you're trying to level up your summer fish God is a move. They got everything too. Chains, pendants, bracelets, even watches. Whether you Keep it simple or you like a little shine. They got the perfect piece for you.

[Pat]

And listen, just don't take our word for it. GLD has over 2 million customers and 50,000 people. 5 star reviews to back it up. Not to mention it's worn by some of the biggest names out there like Justin Bieber, Michael Parsons, Tyreek Hill, Malik Neighbors, asap, Rocky, and a ton more. The best part, every single piece is guaranteed for life. It's a no brainer.

[Jean]

For a limited time only. New customers are getting an insane deal. Use Code crash to get 40% [e-mail]. that's 40% off with code [e-mail]. after your purchase they will ask you where you heard about the them. Please support the show and tell them that we sent you. It's time to lock in and upgrade your style this summer with God.

[Carrie]

I have listened to this podcast. Very exciting.

[Jean]

Okay, let's fix your phone before so. So you can stay on the line. Our producer is telling us to kick you, but we not giving up on you.

[Carrie]

Oh, is this better?

[Pat]

Yeah, way better.

[Jean]

Chill out, Jean. Chill out. Jean, the phone.

[Pat]

Did you take your air. You just took your AirPods out or something?

[Carrie]

I had my phone on speaker. I have groceries in my hand.

[Pat]

All right.

[Jean]

Are you carrying your own groceries?

[Carrie]

I know, it's sad, isn't it?

[Pat]

Yes. Go save her then, Pat.

[Jean]

Oh, I got somebody for her. He get out in six months.

[Pat]

All right, I got a question for you. What's the worst date you've ever been on?

[Carrie]

Oh, my God. Okay, so let me start this out by saying I wanted to not be a good girl anymore. I got on the apps and did everything I said not to do. So I went to this guy's house. We were supposed to watch a movie.

[Jean]

Damn over it. First date?

[Carrie]

Yeah. Yeah, but. But I knew what I was getting into, so it's fine. Well, I didn't know, but I thought I knew anyway. So leading up to it, he was telling me all these things he's gonna do to me. Whatever. Like. Like, it's just stupid. But I get there as soon as he opens the door. He tripped and fell out the door. And mind you, he told me he lived with roommates. His roommates are his parents. And so I said, because when I pulled up to a house, I said, oh, this is a family home. This is bad. So he was like, oh, welcome in. Okay, come sit on the couch. Didn't offer me any food, no water, no nothing. He's not watching TV or a movie. He's watching clips of a TV show off of YouTube.

[Jean]

What? So, like, what, like, how old is he?

[Carrie]

26. Too old. Too old.

[Jean]

Okay, all right, so. So take us through it. Y' all watching clips of a show on tv.

[Carrie]

Yeah. And I'm trying to make conversation because we had talked on the phone previously. So I'm like, okay. We were able to like hold a conversation. So I'm trying to chit chat, trying to, you know, start conversation. He won't talk to me. He won't look at me. So I'm like, oh, this is it. And he keeps checking his phone. And I said, oh, you expecting somebody else? He was like, no, I'm watching the church live stream. Why are you doing that? He's like, oh, just to make sure my parents don't get up.

[Caller]

Oh.

[Carrie]

I said, can you see them in the live stream? He said, yeah, I can see him.

[Jean]

No, that's crazy.

[Pat]

Oh, my God.

[Jean]

You're trying to. You're trying to get you a little Sunday service before they go home.

[Carrie]

No. No. Well, so we're sitting there and I'm like. I said, when he tripped out the door, I knew this is not gonna happen. I said, this is a no go. But whatever. I said, I'm gonna see it through. We'll watch our little movie and then I'm gonna gracefully leave. Then he's trying to, like, touch on me and like, whatever. And I was like, no, no. I kissed him a little bit and even that was gross. But then I felt bad, so I said, I'll give you like a little hand job. That's fine. He was like, yeah, absolutely. I'm not body shaving. I'm not body shaving. But we're sitting on his couch in his family room, mind you. He stands up, pulls his pants down his ankles, and whips out a 4 inch penis.

[Jean]

No, pants down to the ankles.

[Pat]

Our hand job is so crazy.

[Carrie]

That's ridiculous.

[Pat]

I bet you that's some toddler ass shit.

[Jean]

No, that's. I bet you that's how he's still. That's how he's pee at urinals too. He probably jump. He one of the things that jump this down to his ankle.

[Carrie]

Yes. So now I'm scared because I'm like, oh, no, I'm in too deep with his, like, petite penis. So I was like, okay, well, here we go. I kid you not. I touched him for about 30 seconds. Done. All over his. My hands all on his lap, everywhere. Just thick, hot, disgusting. So now I'm sitting there looking at him and he's looking at me. And I said, can I have a towel, please? He stood up, pants still around his ankles, waddled into his kitchen, wiped himself off with a paper towel, then came back in the living room and handed me that same paper towel.

[Jean]

Nah, that's crazy.

[Carrie]

So I said, well, can I wash my hands? He was like, oh, yeah, just go through that door. When I opened his bedroom door, it looked like a hoarder's house. Absolutely disgusting. So I'm washing my hands, no towel. I had to dry my hands with toilet paper. And then I was like, oh, I'm getting a phone call. I gotta go. And I ran.

[Jean]

That's actually crazy.

[Pat]

You still have semen in your hand when you ran away?

[Carrie]

No, I washed my hands.

[Pat]

Oh, you about to say you might

[Jean]

have like legit been the first person to ever touch his penis.

[Carrie]

I think so too. And I said, you know what? That's so disrespectful. Like, why would you have me at your parents house while they're at church? That's horrible.

[Jean]

Now watching them on a live stream is crazy. Every time they get up and sing a song, he like, hold on, girl, they might be. Nah, they just sing.

[Carrie]

He actually did because he said, oh, they're standing up. I said, oh. And he was like, oh, no, no. I guess it's just like prayer or something.

[Pat]

Oh my God.

[Jean]

Now him watching a church live service and a hand job, both. He dragging you with him. Both y' all get sizzling fajita. No.

[Guest Female]

Yes.

[Jean]

You're good.

[Carrie]

No, I'm not.

[Jean]

No, that's crazy.

[Pat]

No, that's a bad date.

[Jean]

That's actually like the worst date I've ever heard. You put yourself a little bit in the position of going over somebody's place where you didn't know who they were, but you didn't deserve all that, you know?

[Carrie]

I know.

[Jean]

Yeah.

[Pat]

That was the last time you spoke to him?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Carrie]

Yes.

[Jean]

Yeah.

[Carrie]

He text me and I say like, oh, how are you? I said, yeah, I'm good. You be blessed. We don't need to see each other anymore.

[Jean]

Oh.

[Pat]

Oh, man. So you said this whole thing started off because you. You were tired of being a good girl.

[Carrie]

Yes.

[Jean]

That's some fucked up ass karma, man.

[Carrie]

Immediately punished.

[Pat]

So trying to be a bad girl and then getting a handful of semen leaving is crazy?

[Jean]

No, Watching a waddle out ass first as.

[Guest Female]

Yes.

[Pat]

So after that, did that make you go back to being a quote unquote good girl?

[Carrie]

I mean, sure.

[Jean]

Nah, she. No, she used that. No, you Use it as your floor. You probably said, it can't get any worse than you double down. That's probably you did.

[Carrie]

I didn't double down.

[Jean]

Yes, you did. I can see it in your voice. You double down.

[Pat]

See it in your voice.

[Jean]

You can't trick me.

[Carrie]

It wasn't a double doubt. I said, well, let's just. Let's just keep exploring.

[Jean]

We know.

[Pat]

How soon after that experience did you go on another date, though?

[Carrie]

Oh, like a couple weeks later.

[Pat]

Okay. Yeah, that's a good one too.

[Jean]

Traumatized hands, one too sticky. You got back again.

[Carrie]

Stop, stop. Well, and then I was like, no, but anytime people ask like, oh, like, how bad has it been for you on the apps? I was like, let me tell you. And they're like, oh, I won't treat you that bad. So I'm like, see? Tricked. You

[Caller]

got him.

[Jean]

Yeah, you did it. All right, we got another car to get on Sticky.

[Carrie]

Perfect.

[Mike]

Thank you.

[Pat]

All right, here I go.

[Jean]

Girl got cutters on.

[Caller]

Yo, what's up?

[Jean]

What's the word? Welcome to Crash on me's podcast. What's good, bro?

[Caller]

How you doing, man?

[Jean]

Good, good, good, good, good.

[Pat]

How you doing?

[Caller]

Good.

[Jean]

I really got a question for you, bro. It sound like you sound pretty plain, Jane.

[Caller]

All right.

[Pat]

What's something you need? What's something you need forgiveness for?

[Jean]

Too late now. Don't try to show us your personality. Just answer the question.

[Caller]

For hiding my grandpa underwear.

[Pat]

Okay. All right. A lot to peel back, I guess. Why did you hide your grandpa's underwear?

[Caller]

We had got into it a little bit and my grandma was doing the laundry and I said, I know I'm gonna get this him. I'mma hide his underwear. So when she folded his up, I just put them in the bottom cabinet in the kitchen. Why are you be searching for them?

[Pat]

You heard him looking for it?

[Caller]

Yeah, like he was searching my grandma. I felt this. Why I need forgiveness cuz my grandma, he made my grandma go get him more underwear cuz we couldn't find this there.

[Pat]

What was he saying when he was looking for it?

[Caller]

He was just like. First he was trying to like blame it on the dude that was living at his house. My grandparents, like, was taking care of somebody, so he was like, oh, he's taking my underwear, taking my underwear and kicking the dude out, but he still couldn't find his underwear. So yeah, I kind of feel bad because it affected more people than him.

[Pat]

Why were you beefing with your grandfather?

[Caller]

I was just out of college and. And I was like staying with him for a Little bit. And he was just like, oh, you need to get a job and stuff into it all the time.

[Pat]

He's trying to motivate you. Why weren't you getting a job?

[Caller]

I was thinking I was working. I was just like. They thought I was, like, supposed to be making a $50,000 or whatever, like, dealing with. To graduate college and buy a house.

[Jean]

Did they. Did they graduate college?

[Caller]

I don't know.

[Jean]

Yeah, see, that's usually what it is. They probably think, like, just because you got the degree is automatic what you get your degree in.

[Caller]

I'm a farmer. My degree is in sustainable agriculture.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jean]

They couldn't expect much from that.

[Caller]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They don't understand. They never, like, really understood it. Yeah, you want to be a farmer?

[Jean]

Okay, let's. Let's go back to your thought process, because I feel like there's a lot of things that you could have did to your granddad to get him like that. What's so special about his underwear? Was it something you saw? Like, oh, when he ain't got his underwear, he tweak out?

[Caller]

Nah, nah, I just.

[Jean]

I don't know.

[Caller]

It's like the. It's really weird thinking about it now. It's like, why did I go for

[Pat]

his underwear at least?

[Jean]

Yeah, no, I'm just saying, like, like, what kind of underwear were they anyways? Like, just boxers.

[Caller]

Just like old.

[Guest Female]

Ha.

[Caller]

Underwear brief.

[Pat]

He hit his granddad's tidy wadies, man.

[Jean]

Hit his granddad draw. That boy went from his granddad draws. This a first thing for revenge is. Is grabbing a underwear,

[Guest Male]

bro.

[Jean]

New generation say, how can I. I make my granddad mad. Oh, let me go grab the thing. He put his dick and balls in.

[Guest Male]

Oh, man.

[Pat]

Okay, man. You have a good one, bro.

[Caller]

Y' all too, bro.

[Jean]

He just took it.

[Pat]

Yo, yo, hold on, hold on.

[Jean]

Yo, what's good? Yo, what's good? I hate. I hate clocking into work like this. Bro up. This shit about this shift about to be fucking terrible. Y' all know I should be allowed to have a bad shift because I feel like everybody else is just, like, you ever clocked in? Like, bro, you work. Who is this? Yeah, I work. You work. And then, like, it's some shifts that you don't want to clock in because it's just like, your co workers just, like, annoying as fuck.

[Pat]

Are you saying I'm annoying?

[Jean]

What?

[Guest Female]

Like.

[Jean]

No, I'm just saying I feel like the callers are our co workers, too, because we working with them to get viral videos.

[Pat]

True.

[Jean]

And sometimes we gotta Help them with question. I'm just saying, don't make my day hard. Oh, my God.

[Pat]

All right. What up, bro? I got a question for you, man.

[Caller]

All right, all right.

[Pat]

What's something you stopped doing that made you feel better?

[Caller]

Stopped having titties.

[Pat]

Okay, okay.

[Jean]

Like, like.

[Caller]

Yeah, all right. No. All right, so I stopped having titties, man, and made my life better.

[Pat]

Like, were you like, overweight?

[Guest Male]

You mean? Mean?

[Caller]

I wasn't overweight. I. It was just like a genetic thing. Like, I'd be like, fit, but, like, the chest would just always be fat as it just be a puffy. Yeah, yeah, it was bad. It was. It was a bad situation no matter how active I was.

[Jean]

Was it like a. Was it like a self conscious thing or were people actively telling you this?

[Caller]

Hell yeah. No, no, no. Actively, Actively.

[Jean]

Who was telling you this the most?

[Caller]

I go, who, bro? Both. I go, who? Or whatever. Talk a little and be like, shut up, titties. Damn.

[Guest Male]

And

[Caller]

since, you know, since I lost him, since, like I had surgery and all that, because it's like, that's what

[Pat]

I was gonna ask. How you.

[Caller]

How.

[Pat]

How'd you lose him?

[Caller]

Yeah, it was surgery, so. Cuz.

[Pat]

But the doctor Miami, no matter how much I.

[Caller]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Pat]

Go ahead, go ahead.

[Jean]

My bad.

[Caller]

I had to go. They had to go under the gland or some to pull the fat out because I can't just lose that, you know, just working out and like that.

[Jean]

Damn. So what's.

[Pat]

What's crazy?

[Jean]

What's the worst joke you ever heard about him

[Caller]

just straight up acknowledging bro? That's. That's bad enough.

[Pat]

So what was the surgery call that

[Jean]

you did now got surgery so he don't get motorboated.

[Caller]

What's it called? Was it like a gyno? It's like, like just gyo surgery.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Caller]

Or chest ex chest extraction.

[Pat]

Like, what was the recovery for that, though? Like, did it make your chest look a little bit weird now?

[Caller]

No, it just looks flatter. Like, it makes. It makes sense. Like, like I tell you, it made my life better.

[Pat]

Can you like, build muscle there? Because obviously, like, is it like you got a bird chest now or can you like.

[Caller]

No, no, no, no. I could build muscle now.

[Guest Female]

Yeah.

[Caller]

He said I can go back to better muscles. I just couldn't do. Related to my chest for like the last six weeks.

[Jean]

No, you got.

[Caller]

But I'm like, at my final wig. Nah.

[Pat]

Oh, you just got. You just got it?

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Jean]

Nah, he got the Brittany grinder chest.

[Caller]

Ever since I've been back to the court.

[Jean]

I like her chest.

[Caller]

I.

[Guest Female]

Okay.

[Jean]

I can't say that it.

[Pat]

Look, she's a fan of the pods.

[Jean]

No, she really is. But I like her chest.

[Pat]

Yeah, okay.

[Jean]

She had surgery on her chest. He did, too. That's a great comparison. How's that funny?

[Caller]

I go back to hoop now. I go back to hoop now. Right? And remember I said, they say, oh, yeah, shut up, titties. Whatever the. Like, I'll go hoop. I'll talk my. I like, yeah, step up. And they like, yeah, all right, bro.

[Jean]

Because before you was sitting down that big butt, they were still staring at the titties, though,

[Caller]

bro. What the.

[Pat]

Nah, bro. That's dope. At least you. You did something to work on yourself. Obviously, there's nothing you. You could have done to get rid of him. So you say the thing about when people say things, then there's gonna be somebody in the comments saying that you're. You're full of bull. You're full of that. You could have got rid of it,

[Jean]

but if you got surgery, I feel like it was real. I feel like they wouldn't have did the surgery.

[Pat]

Guys don't get freaking breast surgery.

[Jean]

Yeah, he must have really.

[Caller]

Like, I lost. I lost over, like, 100 pounds, and that was, like, the only thing that didn't leave.

[Jean]

Damn. You got. You still got pictures of it?

[Caller]

Yeah, I got, like, pictures of, like, the whole recovery and all of that.

[Jean]

That's like.

[Caller]

Like, day one and all the weeks and like that. And I'm about to go in sometime this week.

[Pat]

The picture on your. In your profile, did you have the titties or do you didn't have the titties. Cities picture.

[Caller]

My profile. What's my picture on my profile?

[Pat]

The only picture you got posted.

[Caller]

That was like. Oh, that was like. That was like. That was like a couple weeks before I had my surgery.

[Pat]

Oh, yeah.

[Caller]

Oh, And I wore, like, a bunch of, like, compression shits to hide it and all that.

[Jean]

You should have put some tape on them. I can still see you

[Caller]

up, bro. No, I haven't took a picture since, bro, but. But I'm about to now.

[Pat]

You're good, bro. I'm glad you got your confidence back, though.

[Guest Male]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Is that. That's what they really helped with, though? What Is that what it really helped with? Get your confidence back?

[Caller]

Hell, yeah. Hell, yeah. I ain't gonna lie. I've. My social life been 100. I've been just out here. I've been talking my. I've been feeling. I've been doing. I've been doing me so since.

[Jean]

Since you don't look like Sydney Sweeney no more. You over here talking your.

[Guest Male]

Oh, my God.

[Caller]

Yes, sir.

[Jean]

Get surgery.

[Caller]

That's a fact.

[Jean]

You always be taking change

[Caller]

up. That's crazy.

[Pat]

All right, Br. You have a good one. Hey, go ahead.

[Caller]

Hey. But I went to the Detroit show. I went to the Detroit show. And that was nice before.

[Pat]

Oh, yeah. You just said he's the last week. So you already had the surgery by then.

[Jean]

Oh, he already had the surgery.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Caller]

I was about to say some. Yeah, that's why I went, man. I, I. When I went with titties.

[Jean]

Yeah. You knew not to bring them titties.

[Pat]

Let just say you can't be vulnerable on here. You can be vulnerable.

[Caller]

No, no, no.

[Jean]

I would have signed your bro

[Guest Male]

talk. My what?

[Jean]

Your titties, bro.

[Pat]

Now you have a good one, bro.

[Jean]

Glad you got the confidence back.

[Pat]

Appreciate you coming out to support.

[Caller]

All right.

[Pat]

All right, bro.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Mike]

You had mentioned embarrassing the girl. It made me think of Kanye and what he does with his wife currently. Do you look at that as embarrassing her?

[Pat]

I don't think she cares as much much.

[Jean]

I see it as like, that's his muse, you know?

[Pat]

Yeah. And I think she. I think she's embodied being his muse.

[Jean]

Is he the last shoot they did.

[Mike]

Yeah. With the cow.

[Pat]

Yeah, the milking the cow thing, I just. And then made her drink it.

[Jean]

He didn't make her drink it.

[Pat]

No.

[Mike]

But I don't know, the whole barefoot thing.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

To me, being like half almost naked in public spaces.

[Guest Female]

I don't know.

[Pat]

That's not probably how they met, though.

[Jean]

Yeah, exactly. To me, that's exactly what he said. Like Kanye at that point, when she met Kanye, like, there's no way she didn't think that was going to continue to happen. Like, obviously, you see him, he already doing half the he doing now in a relationship. And obviously, like Mike said, that's probably how they met. She was probably on some wild too. And they like, damn, I'm a milky one day.

[Pat]

You know how, like when you see two people or that might seem a little odd, but then they're both odd. It's like, oh, you guys are really meant for each other.

[Jean]

Yeah.

[Mike]

But there's north meeting hair.

[Jean]

Huh. Then north be around, but north just like her dad, you know? I mean, she kind of like music. Yeah.

[Mike]

She like I mentioned north in the sense of her age and seeing how her dad treats this woman or whatever. And maybe how Kim might look at that. Like, dang, how you got her around my daughter.

[Jean]

Like, yeah, that's true.

[Pat]

I think they've had those conversations, like in depth conversation, like who your dad is, what he does, and how he may be at times.

[Jean]

Yeah, I think, but I also think they been used to that. Like, look at who their dad is. You can't tell me north has never had a Twitter account or Instagram account and seen random shit about her dad or a random shit about her mom. So like, she has to be numb to all that and know, like, I'm never gonna believe or look too far into like, what the Internet is posting.

[Pat]

And that's their norm.

[Jean]

They literally grew up like that shit. If anybody is ready, it's gotta be them damn kids. Somebody said a tweet said, why when get laced, they get an Android. I feel like that's always true. You never seen somebody get laced. It's like one of the saddest things in the world, bro.

[Pat]

They get an Android.

[Jean]

Yeah, like, they just like, they get an Android.

[Mike]

I don't care anymore.

[Jean]

They start believing in conspiracies and I know what you're talking about. Yeah, bro, that's crazy. That is wild. You know what it is though, is that like, it is the conspiracies. They're like, oh, the iPhone got something in them and shit like that. They do no real shit. But the, the thing I say, I knew this dude that got laced in high school, right? And he got so paranoid that he, he grabbed his like dad's gun and did like three armed robberies within a span of like an hour, 30 minutes. Like, strong arming people for their cars, just driving to random places. And then they got 11 years off that shit. Damn, ain't that crazy? Like, you can get laced and like, make like the justice system is so fucked up. Like, they don't even be looking at cases. Cases, like just case to case, like people like us to be judges. It's just like, okay, bro, you robbed a store. Like, where do you live? Okay, you broke. You know what I'm saying? Like, why did you rob this store? You gonna do it again? Let's, we can judge off character and

[Pat]

I can't be a judge. Why not? I feel like I, I, I feel too much empathy. Like sometimes when I, even when I see like those young kids who committed murder and then seeing them break down when they get their verdict, the life sentence or whatever, even though I know they committed some crazy crime, they deserve to be in prison.

[Carrie]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You still feel that, that empty empathy because, like, damn, they just really ruined their life. So I don't know. I don't think I could be personally be a judge. I don't got that. I don't know. I'm not stern enough in that sense.

[Jean]

Yeah, I couldn't be. I'm not doing no major judge, like, a murder case and all that. No, no, no. I'm doing, like, armed robberies and like that. Come on, bro. Like, let's like, okay, you got $3,000 in your bank account.

[Caller]

Account?

[Jean]

Why the. Is you stealing visa cards, bro? 10 years.

[Mike]

Have you ever been a juror?

[Pat]

I can't even say it.

[Jean]

Oh, no, you're not allowed to say no.

[Pat]

No, I have not.

[Jean]

I was. I was a jury for a murder case. I was ready to go, so I kept saying, guilty, guilty.

[Mike]

Recognize me.

[Jean]

Come on, man.

[Pat]

Be me. Being a jury. And I say, like, the person. Person that. That knows me. That's like being prosecuted. That's like a weird feeling.

[Jean]

I know you, bro. That's crazy.

[Pat]

Crash dummies and pass me like, audio listener or YouTube watcher.

[Jean]

Oh, my. My DM of the week. Somebody DM me for some reason and said, I had a dream that Mike was streaming Minecraft on Tick Tock Live, and I came and told him to shut his ass up because y' all had previously FaceTimed the Knicks player in their shared hotel room and didn't invite me. I'm sorry, man. What do you gotta say about that?

[Pat]

Having dreams about pressing me,

[Jean]

like, what? No, that's funny. Over Minecraft? You ever played Minecraft before?

[Pat]

A couple times.

[Jean]

Really? I never played that, bro.

[Pat]

But not, like, probably, like, like, three hours of my life.

[Jean]

Hell, no. I'm done with video games, bro. Wait, I don't. I don't. You said what?

[Pat]

Why are you dumping video games?

[Jean]

I. So I recently tried to dive back into video just to, like, kind of, you know, create a safe space for my brain because I feel like I'm always thinking about, like, the next skit or something. So I played 2K, and when I tell you it was the most horrific experience of my life, bro. Like, I couldn't do shit that I used to. And even when I, like, went to the gym and practiced by myself with my player, I still couldn't get it down. And I just started thinking, like, bro, it's people like me, me that's giving all their energy to this video game, and that's all they doing. And that's why they so good. Like, it was a dude on there talking trash like you.

[Carrie]

Sorry.

[Jean]

As Unc. Wrap it up. And I'm like, bro, like, what. What the do you do for a living? And like the worked like night shift or whatever, but he claimed he got bands and it's whatever. Weak as hell. No, he was, bro, I'm talking about, bro, I played this like one on one five times. Damn near didn't even score.

[Pat]

I'm like.

[Jean]

But I'm like, bro, this all you do and you focus and it's just like these video games, like, especially the popular ones is like, bro, I can't compete, bro, because I. I'm coming home from a podcast. Just. No, I kept playing. I kept playing for like three hours. But they was busting my ass, bro. And I kept asking him like, how old is you to like, I'm 26. I'm 27. And just like, bro, like, this is what he do. Like, he clock in at Myers, he clock out, he come play the video game. They try to teach you. Like, they try to teach you like Charles Barkley and Space Jam. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now the little. Y' all got it, bro. Y' all got the video game. I see. Like, I even tried to do some bor. Like jump on Fortnite and I played like the. The builder mode, bro. I shot at a once he built a castle on kill.

[Pat]

I remember those days where Fortnite was popular when I used to try to play. The reason I hopped off Fortnite, it was just like, bro didn't say you're. You sucked by a 14 year old, 16 year old. There was the. The age gap with the people that. Or the age like. Yeah. Of people that can play that game or play that game is like too wide for me.

[Mike]

Yeah, I've never played it before. I only stick to the games that I know. Like when I will play Crash Bandicoot.

[Jean]

Oh, that's old school.

[Mike]

I used to play like Halo a lot.

[Jean]

That's old school. But like, you have you play video games in your adult life?

[Mike]

Sims. I think that's a girl's.

[Jean]

No, that's definitely a girl's game. I like, seems to be like how the you get pregn America. Nobody want to hear that.

[Pat]

I like. I do like those simulator games. Like, it'd be like a. Like you own a convenience store type of similar. Yeah, like, like stocking up or the farm. The farming games and like that. I kind of like playing those sometimes.

[Jean]

Roller coaster tycoon used to be Fire, bro.

[Pat]

What's. Which one?

[Jean]

Is that where you build a roller coaster? You control an amusement park.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Jean]

And hot dog stands. Yeah, bro, he's like throwing up.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Jean]

If you ain't hired too many generators, like you got too much throw up on the sidewalk. My favorite one was zoo tycoon though. Like building a zoo and like getting different animals and that. Then when a like throw up on your sidewalk, you can put a hole in the lion's cage. That's what I used to do. They'd be like, it's a lion loose. I was like, I turned my head, I see that you got the game

[Mike]

you need to pick up and play again. What the zoo tycoon. Cuz it is Men's Mental Health Awareness Month. Right. And I know a lot of guys play video games for their mental health

[Pat]

and it relieves their spouses.

[Jean]

Yes. Oh, that's what it really is.

[Pat]

Sometimes it is.

[Jean]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Guys need more. You know, we gotta start being okay, taking our space. Taking your space. That's okay. Your space, fellas.

[Jean]

Cuz it used to be random sports. But like, like the older you get, the harder it is to find a, like a random spot to base play a sport without being committed. Like if I want to play flag football, I gotta go join a team full of people I fucking hate just to play a game once a week that I might miss if it falls too early. If it's 10 o' clock and I ain't got no babysitter for my son. Now I miss a whole fucking football game. So it just like that shit is very hard to find. Or you walk into a basketball, it's usually basketball is literally the only thing you can like walking to randomly and there's like no tears. Like you're either walking into like damn near a NBA pro run and you're the shortest dude out there at six foot one or you walking in, you playing with 50 year old man and you score him 50 and you feel like LeBron James.

[Pat]

And no, that's a good ego boost. When you play against the old fella,

[Jean]

the old people keep getting.

[Pat]

Oh my gosh. And then all you do is facilitating too. Yeah. You try. You're making them better. And yeah, those old people people like to like the older people, like I'm saying like 50 and up. They like to feel like they're still contributing. Yeah. So once you feed them the ball, especially the corner three.

[Jean]

Shoot that Earl. Oh that's. Oh, that's the best thing you can do to them is when they miss a three, you look at them and say keep shooting. Oh, they love that sh.

[Mike]

They love.

[Jean]

I got you. And then they bank in the game winner. I Believed in you. It's like, bro, I got my local dentist to score four points in a basketball game. Like, I'm him, bro. I'm him, he.

[Pat]

And the thing about once you, like, befriend those old people, they will ride for you wherever. Like, if you need a job or some like that, they gonna help you in the real world, bro.

[Mike]

That's a problem. These young dudes don't have no OGs.

[Pat]

And they, no, no, they're not trying to be friends. They be clowning the OGs too much,

[Jean]

but the OGs be trying to compete too much.

[Pat]

And that is true. Like Paul Pierce.

[Jean]

Yeah, like, they exactly. Oh, Paul Pierce. You also be married and, like, saving these girls for the young and so they can go through their lessons and maybe find their wife. But you over here competing with. And I'm like, stop paying so much for the girls.

[Mike]

That's the example.

[Jean]

No, but I, I, I be getting where everybody come from. That's why, like, I hate being so opinionated. I hate that people even pay attention to what I say sometimes. Cuz, like, I got, I got my own opinion and then sometimes I'll express it and then I have 20 people DMing me be like, that you said, not true. I'm like, it's not true for you, ass. But it's true for me.

[Pat]

I'm a always, like, willing to be wrong about something. Even when I, Even when I listen back sometimes to pods that I've done, I'm like, oh, I was probably wrong about that. But that's the point of a podcast. That's the point about giving your opinion because you have to be brave enough to give your opinion on something where everybody can hear people be giving their opinions in private and be like. Or they have the, you know, we always talk about that. They have the, the convenience of Google to, like, prove them right and then comment about something I'm wrong about. Like, bro, I didn't know, bro.

[Jean]

I don't listen to people that, like, come on here and be like, pat was wrong about such and such. Like, ass, you got two friends and you say, I don't know. Every day, like, y', all, all three are in the group chat. Like, I don't know, bro. Y' all scared to give y' all peace to each other. Like, I'm doing this for the masses. I'm taking risks every day I'm wrong. Y' all asking me who gonna win the finals, and then I give y' all my opinion. Then y' all come back and throw it in My face. Y' all some hoes, man. That's some old ass. Ass, bro. Why you asking me?

[Pat]

I do like a debate, though. I do like people saying, like, in a. In a more informed way, like, are you wrong? So then it kind of gives me room to then rebuttal with where I'm coming from or elaborate on my opinion.

[Mike]

Yeah. Rather than conversation.

[Pat]

I like the conversation. Not like, shut y' all dumb ass up. This and that. And it's like, okay.

[Jean]

No, I don't really. I don't say I'll let people cook. But it's all about the approach, though. Like, some people be doing it as like to. To make you look bad. It's just like, oh, y' all didn't know about the court case in 1967? Duh, we didn't. Why don't you type it out instead of just telling us about the court case from 1967? Some. You probably went in Google or everybody.

[Pat]

Why do you have that in your brain?

[Jean]

Exactly. But I'm not. I'm not blaming them because we all have random information.

[Pat]

I don't. I won't weaponize my random information because

[Jean]

I know it's random. I know it's random. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, just like I know who Susan B. Anthony is. You know what I'm saying? Like, it just be like, why would I weaponize, huh?

[Pat]

Who is she?

[Jean]

A woman?

[Pat]

The fuck?

[Caller]

No.

[Jean]

Go vote. Go vote.

[Pat]

Go vote. When is the next election? Like, what we got midterms? Come on.

[Jean]

Come on.

[Pat]

I don't know why we looked at Carrie. You just seem like the most responsible out of the all.

[Mike]

Got to do the. I think the primary.

[Jean]

What we voting for the mayor in, like, fall.

[Pat]

Oh, yeah, Mayor.

[Jean]

That's why he. That's why he doing all them videos.

[Mike]

Governor.

[Jean]

The governor. That's why the mayor.

[Pat]

Governor. Governor.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Jean]

He's voting for the governor or the mayor?

[Pat]

Yeah, the governor. One of Donnie just got inducted.

[Mike]

So he's the mayor.

[Pat]

He's the mayor now. I'm just saying that's why the mayor won.

[Jean]

Inducted? Is it inducted?

[Pat]

It is.

[Jean]

It's elected.

[Pat]

No, inducted. Inducted into the.

[Jean]

The hall of Fame.

[Guest Female]

Yeah.

[Jean]

Mandani just got abducted by some aliens. They got abducted.

[Pat]

They come in here for the political news. America's GDP just dropped 10%.

[Mike]

Speaking of that, real quick. I feel like you finna cook with something. I gotta know how y' all feel about this UFC claw being built on the White House right now. Have y' all seen that?

[Jean]

Yeah.

[Mike]

What's up. Like, are y' all into ufc? Do you know the relevancy of all of this?

[Pat]

I think, I think obviously it's Trump's birthday too, on the day, on this day. And usually UFC fights are on Saturday nights. So I think that also people are suing, trying to sue and stop it because they say that it's. You're using government property and stuff like that. But Trump and Dana White, who owns the ufc, are buddy, buddy. So I think personally, this is my conspiracy theory. Well, the conspiracy theories I hear is that that Trump owns a percentage of, you know, the TK TKO group, which oversees ufc. So him doing the event profits him as well, right?

[Mike]

Allegedly.

[Pat]

Allegedly. Yeah, allegedly.

[Jean]

I mean, he gained so much money since being in office. I don't, I don't like that shit, though. Like, I want, I want our elected officials to be broke. Like, I want to be able. I want to be able to walk into Walmart and see Trump in the dairy aisle. You know what I'm saying? Just like I, I think, I think that's how it should be. So I can walk up to him like, hey, like, what is we doing, bro?

[Pat]

No, but they're. Their salaries. Their salaries are obviously, I think the president's salary is like $400,000 a year. Yeah, but like every politician is.

[Jean]

But we, but we know, but it makes sense. Why. I. I don't. Sometimes I don't blame them because it's like they have insider information on like, stocks and trades. So just like the person that owns the company is they're going out to dinner with every day. And if a. Looking crazy, crazy like, wait, why this not paying for dinner? Oh, your about to. Okay, let me go ahead and take my money out real quick.

[Pat]

I'm just saying, if you had insider information, would. Would that make you trade differently, bro?

[Jean]

Hell yeah, bro. And I'll be bragging about it. I'll be, I'll be teaching classes.

[Pat]

No, it is illegal.

[Mike]

That's what I'm about to say. Do it on the radio.

[Pat]

But I don't know. I don't know. I think separating sports and politics needs to be a lot more. More even. Like the Trump coming to the Knicks game.

[Jean]

And then that was some.

[Pat]

I think, I think it's one of those things where it made it harder for people of New York to like, get in the game, get out the game.

[Mike]

It's crazy though, because I said on the pod that I feel like if it was Obama, nobody would have cared

[Pat]

that he was at the game.

[Jean]

Yeah, no, they Would have went crazy.

[Mike]

They would have embraced.

[Jean]

Yeah, but as a president. As a president that went crazy, I

[Mike]

think it would have been amazing.

[Jean]

No, it would have been amazing. But it's just like, Obama just. I don't think Obama would ever present himself like that. I think Trump is doing lot of things that. When Obama was in office. That's why I feel like Obama does a lot of stuff now. Obama would have invited him to the White House, like, after he. But I think Obama would have never make a public appearance like that. And we're at war. He would just. Obama was a person that, like, when he came on tv, no matter what he did, like, the bombings, whatever. Y'. All. Y' all gonna be in the comments, like, did you know Obama did the same thing as Trump? Like, cool. But one thing Obama did is he hit it. He was like that good parent is just like, you hear your parents fighting, and then your dad come over there like, yeah, me and your mom was arguing about who better, Jordan LeBron. You like?

[Pat]

Ah, damn.

[Jean]

That's what I thought. Pops, we all good. You know, he make you feel good.

[Pat]

And I also think Obama is just more popular among NBA fans at that game because Trump was getting booed. I don't think Obama would have got booed when he was there. So I. You're right. I don't think people would have cared if. About the person because. But it's like, if somebody I already don't like is making my life harder, you're getting booed. Like. But if somebody that I really like, and it's like, I get it, I'll. I'll suffer this minor inconvenience or maybe major inconvenience, because I really like this person.

[Mike]

You cool with me?

[Pat]

Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

[Jean]

But. But also, we. We live more in a world where, like, the new generation, we kind of don't care, but the generation under us don't give a fuck. Yeah, but like, back when. Back when, like, Obama was president his first term and before him, it was kind of like, damn, can we boo the president? Yeah, like, will something happen to us if we boo the president? But now people are in the stages, like, ah, I wish a president would just. And blah, blah. And he's saying it publicly. Back in the day, nigga, you'll get gone. But it's so much technology that if. When somebody says, like, something erratical these days, they're almost protected. Like, okay, we watching you now because you're going against these people now. You can't die. But back in the day, you Make a video like that nigga, you gone.

[Pat]

It's like that was a point. It was a time. I was like, if you didn't stand up and put your hand over your heart, you felt like, bro, I'm sorry. You felt like you're getting in trouble.

[Jean]

Especially around, around 9 11, man, somebody beat the out. You're gonna take your hat off. They can take your hat off. What's under the hat?

[Pat]

I'm not gonna lie. I stopped taking my hat off and like for the pledge of allegiance for a while. And even like putting my hand over my heart. Even in college, I, before the whole anthem. Okay, Even in college when we did like the thing, I never really put my hand over my heart. I just do like, I put my head down and put my hands behind my back or something.

[Jean]

I, I, I wish, like, so I was one year old year removed from college, so I was, I was actually like a GA coach. So I coach college football and. But no, but they took a knee that year. Yeah, no, maybe, maybe this was when. Because you weren't there.

[Pat]

Maybe I was there when there was

[Jean]

when they taking a knee.

[Pat]

Right?

[Jean]

Okay, so some players took a knee and I, like, I technically wasn't allowed to take a knee or I could have lost my job. So I stood by the players that like, took a knee and like put the shoulder. I felt like Jerry Jones and shit. Get a boys. Yeah, but it's just like, not like, I feel like that's when it first started. Like people taking knees during the national anthem. That's when it's like, okay, I forgot.

[Pat]

That was like, it felt like a trend too.

[Jean]

Yeah, it was.

[Pat]

Yeah. Like five year olds at their peewee games.

[Jean]

Grown ass white man. Get up right now.

[Pat]

Get up right now, little guy.

[Mike]

Shout out Kaepernick.

[Pat]

Yeah, shout out Kaepernick.

[Jean]

No, Kaepernick was taking knees, bro. He had old white man fucking red look at his tattoos.

[Pat]

Especially after it was a white man that told him to. That would be more respectful than sitting down.

[Jean]

No, bro, but now people don't fuck

[Pat]

with Kaepernick like that no more because they, you know, he settled with the NFL.

[Mike]

So did Jay Z.

[Pat]

That's true too.

[Jean]

Yeah. I mean, a lot of people think they know what they would do until it's $10 million waving in front of

[Mike]

say that about every.

[Jean]

I say that about you and him and me and him. I just don't, I don't care. I'm not saying you would take the money, but to sit there and act like you Already have your decision, right? I'm not saying you can't.

[Pat]

That's true.

[Jean]

I'm not saying you can't say no again. But to act like you wouldn't reset and reevaluate it, it's just a blatant lie. So if somebody say, like, hey, I want you. I want to offer you 10 million, and we love your podcast, Brain Squeeze, but I want you to never talk about black excellence. I want you to keep it just pop culture and push, you know, celebrity breakups and that. And we gonna pay you 10 million every year. You do that. The table. And, like, right. Like right now, you say no, right? Yeah, right. But, like, when it's like, the money in front of you, they like, okay, here's a $10 million check, or here's the wire transfer that we're about to send. You sure you don't want this?

[Pat]

I think you got to reevaluate for things like that. It's easy for me to say. I would say no just because if I'm being offered 10 million from someone, I already think I'm in that realm of, like, that money already, where I could get another offer where I can keep my morals in the same path.

[Jean]

Oh, yeah, whatever, buddy. What do you think about gang violence?

[Mike]

I feel like it's fine.

[Pat]

No, but I get you're still right, though. Your point is still right, is that you, like you said, you won't know what you would do until the money. It's easy to say no to hypothetical like this because just like, why am I going to be like, I'm on the other side of I'm already Basically, you're cashing in your morals already before there's money in. In your face. Yes.

[Mike]

I get tired of these social media critics. They like to bash everybody else and talk about what they would or wouldn't do. And it's like, you truly don't know unless you're in their shoes.

[Jean]

Also, the other thing is, like, now that we know it's some conspiracy theories, I won't put them out there because I want nobody tapping my phone or some shit. But, like, when someone offers you a crazy amount of money, Money to do something, sometimes it doesn't feel like an offer. Yeah, right. It feels like, no, take this because you're doing too much. Brain squeeze is. Hey, we calculated. We did the demographics on brain squeeze. And you making all these people think differently.

[Mike]

We.

[Jean]

Not with that. We offering you 10 million. Okay, you want to turn it down? Okay. We're gonna put a brick on Your gas pedal. Good luck.

[Pat]

Is it a brick on the gas pedal or is it the brick under the, the brakes?

[Jean]

No, I feel. But you know, they, they can control your car. Like all cars are controllable that way. Like the newer cars can like be

[Mike]

sped up like the electric ones.

[Pat]

Yeah, I know you can slow down your people's Teslas.

[Jean]

Yeah, you can.

[Pat]

Like when you're renting out Teslas and like, especially like if you're renting like, like through an app like Turo, where it's like peer to peer.

[Guest Male]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You can speed cap it where it's like they can't go over a certain. So because some people be like burning like going on 20 and they if

[Jean]

you can speed cap recap, you can't tell me that that, that technology can't be reverse engineered into speeding.

[Pat]

I. I don't know.

[Jean]

It has to be. So I'm just saying like if they got that control to me, like anytime you watch a movie and you see something crazy like, damn, that's some futuristic. The government already did that to me. They just hiding it because they just be like, why the will we give these dumbass flying cars? They still accidentally shaking ass. I was listening to some walking music and you know how like they be getting on Little Milwaukee for throwing. Throwing ass. And during the dance, I was doing one of the dances and when you do the arm movement, your hips start to slightly move and it's just like, that's why they be. I feel like they'd be accidentally throwing ass and they don't even know it. They'd be like, whoops. That's why they always do it like once or twice. And they turn off the video.

[Pat]

Oh my God. Anyway, that's been the episode. Appreciate y' all supporting. Make sure you guys grab the Patreon. Make sure you guys follow us on all platforms. Everything's in the description.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Peace. Peace.

[Jean]

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